#banger sandman volume

[rabbit-surfboard]

Years ago I pirated a digital copy of the first volume of The Sandman and I think I got about halfway through the first volume before deciding I just couldn't read it without a physical copy because the panelling was just too cool.

Last month I finally picked up the first couple of volumes from the library and was pleased to find that I was 100% correct -- the visual presentation is sick as hell and really adds to the experience. Also, reading it at 2am with some candles and incense is just peak horror vibes.

I despise reading comics on my phone because the screen is too small for the art, but trying to get through these page in the second volume on a PC screen would be such a waste.

My favorite part of this dream sequence was that the last textbox going upright perfectly cued me to put the book back into the original orientation before turning the page. Absolute banger panelling technique.

[drasnianfrank]

Twenty Books Challenge

Hypothetically, you are only able to keep 20 of your books. Only one book per author/series. So what books are you keeping? Credit due to @the-forest-library (I have been thinking about this list for like a week straight)

Guardians of the West by David and Leigh Eddings - any of the Belgariad/Mallorean series frankly. I read these series I don't know how many times as teen. Yes, they are a problematic. Yes they are trope-y as hell but I love them.

Memory by Lois McMaster Bujold - inching just barely above Miles in Love or Mountains of Mourning.

Goblin Emperor by Katherine Addison - This is a book that always makes me cry.

Whale Talk by Chris Cutcher - A swim team comprised of various kids with disabilities and are deeply flawed but are also attempting to do good things? I wish this was on every book list for teens.

All Systems Red (Murderbot Diaries) by Martha Wells - I mean all murderbot series is great. Funny story, I told my mom to read this book eons ago and she only read it after a librarian recommended it.

Return of the King by JRR Tolkien - though technically LotR is one book and I don't have single copies of this anymore. But the scouring of the shire just hits me in different places when I read it.

A Child's Anthology of Poetry edited by Elizabeth Hauge Sword and Victoria Flournoy McCarthy - My textbook of poetry when I was young.

Cloud Cuckoo Land by Anthony Doerr - Another a book that makes me absolutely sob.

The Realms of the Gods by Tamora Pierce - I love the Wild Magic Series the most of all Pierce's series. And yes, I recognize the problematic relationship. But also, talking badger.

Sabriel by Garth Nix - I'm sorry the far superior goth necromancer with bells.

First Truth by Dawn Cook - If had I pick one of the truth series. I have an unnatural fondness of a book series that combines magic with Punnett Squares.

Macbeth by William Shakespeare. Narrowly above Midsummer Night's Dream. But the tomorrow speech is an absolute banger.

All Creatures Great and Small by James Herriot - Any of the Herriot books. I read these almost to pieces.

Double Whammy by Carl Hiassen - It was this or Squeeze Me. But Skink really deserves to saved.

House of Leaves by Mark Z Danielewski - Post Modern Horror.

Where the Sidewalk Ends by Shel Silverstein - More Poetry of my childhood.

Dark Tales by Shirley Jackson - specifically The Possibility of Evil.

Daredevil vol 6 by Mark Waid, Chris Samnee - Graphic Novels count and I will fight you. This has one of the first individual issues I picked up.

Sandman vol. 8: World's End by Neil Gaiman, Micha Allred - Sandman holds a near and dear place in my heart. It was a close call between this and American Gods or Preludes and Nocturnes. But I will have echoes of Crements in my head.

Hawkeye vol. 4: Rio Bravo by Matt Fraction, David Aja - Pizza Dog! Also any of the volumes are fantastic and visually gorgeous.

I did take the prompt literally, but here are five more books I either always buy on kindle/can only get as an ebook. I would pay an extraordinary amount of money for these in print.

Toad Words and other stories by T Kingfisher - I was following her when she was still writing fantasy!

I Reap You Not by Catelyn Winona - Second Person done right.

True Porn Clerk Stories by Ali Davis - This causes me to giggle, rage, and cry.

The Heiress Effect by Courtney Milan - Brothers Sinister series is the standard I compare all Regency Novels to.

Night Shift by Stephen King - Specifically Quitter's Inc. But frankly any collection of Stephen King is gold.

Tagging @thatoldstandby, @msfehrwight, @raventycho, @timemachineyeah, @theneptuneviolin and anyone else. And of course you can include pictures too.

[uovoc]

2022 media consumption year in review

God tier

Matthew Swift series and Magicals Anonymous duology by Kate Griffin (reread). London sorcerer is raised from the dead and accidentally gets fused to the blue electric angels of the telephone lines along the way. Luscious prose, best urban magic I've ever read, and wickedly funny sense of humor.

Kane and Feels - podcast. Paranormal investigators go around London poking the mystic forces with a sharp stick. Surreal. Funny. Moderately comprehensible. There's nothing else quite like it. Someone described it as "the anti-TMA: you cannot form any theories about it no matter how hard you try."

The First Fifteen Lives of Harry August by Claire North (reread) - two time travelers, defined as people stuck in time loops of their own lives, attempt to unravel the mystery of their existence. Suspenseful and beautifully constructed piece of nonlinear storytelling.

The Particular Sadness of Lemon Cake by Aimee Bender (reread) - Rose tastes people's emotions in food. Her brother disappears into thin air. Their parents are fine. Surreal and haunting pearl of a story.

We Have Always Lived in the Castle by Shirley Jackson - after a family tragedy, the surviving Blackwoods live in isolation from the village. A little Piranesi-ish subverted horror: the sense there's a secret at the heart of the world, and the secret is both joyful and terrible.

Our Flag Means Death - the crangst-filled pirate show that it seemed like the internet lost its mind over, for good reason.

Bee and Puppycat: Lazy in Space - Bee travels between the island and fishbowl space working temp jobs with Puppycat, until their pasts catch up with them. Dreamy, bittersweet, and gorgeous. Season finale was a banger.

Vesper Flights by Helen MacDonald (reread). Nature essays on humans and birds. Quiet, luminous, and filled with love of place. Faves were "The Human Flock", "High Rise", "Eulogy", and "What Animals Taught Me"

Natsume's Book of Friends (anime) - Technically about boy who can see youkai, learning how to navigate the world of human relationships. But really about masking, healing from trauma, and learning to trust.

Decent entertainment

The Deep by Rivers Solomon with Daveed Diggs, William Hutson, and Jonathan Snipes

Encanto (2021) - movie

The Witcher, season 2 - show

What We Do in the Shadows - seasons 1-3, got bored afterwards

The Hands of the Emperor by Victoria Goddard

Seraphina by Rachel Hartman

Shadow Scale by Rachel Hartman

Island of the Blue Dolphins by Scott O'Dell (reread)

The Faceless Old Woman Who Secretly Lives in Your Home by Joseph Fink and Jeffrey Cranor

Touch by Claire North (reread)

Sing - movie

Notes from the Burning Age by Claire North

The Sign of the Beaver by Elizabeth George Speare (reread)

The Brothers Lionheart by Astrid Lindgren

Moon Knight - show, season 1

Moon Knight comics - 2011, 2014, 2016, 2021

The Batman (2022)

Spider-Man: No Way Home (2021)

The Girl with the Silver Eyes by Willo Davis Roberts (reread)

The Bad Guys (2022)

The Golem and the Jinni by Helene Wecker (reread)

The Hidden Palace by Helene Wecker

The Pursuit of William Abbey by Claire North

Johannes Cabal series by Jonathan L. Howard (reread): Johannes Cabal the Necromancer, Johannes Cabal the Detective, Johannes Cabal: The Fear Institute, The Brothers Cabal, and The Fall of the House of Cabal

The Owl House season 2

Dear Mr. Henshaw by Beverly Cleary (reread)

Strider by Beverly Cleary (reread)

Loki - show, season 1

Tess of the Road by Rachel Hartman

Paprika (2006) dir. Satoshi Kon (rewatch)

Sideways Stories from Wayside School by Louis Sachar (reread)

The Bloody Chamber and Other Stories by Angela Carter

Supernatural - seasons 1 – 6, selected episodes

The Sandman by Neil Gaiman - comics (reread)

The Sandman - show, season 1

Microcosmic God: The complete short stories of Theodore Sturgeon, volume II by Theodore Sturgeon

Various Dick King-Smith books (reread): The Merman, Harry's Mad, and Harriet's Hare

Klara and the Sun by Kazuo Ishiguro

Never Let Me Go by Kazuo Ishiguro

The Girl From the Other Side - anime

She Who Became the Sun by Shelley Parker-Chan

The Farewell (2019) dir. Lulu Wang

Horatio Lyle series by Catherine Webb: The Extraordinary and Unusual Adventures of Horatio Lyle, The Obsidian Dagger, The Doomsday Machine, and The Dream Thief

Mononoke (2007) dir. Kenji Nakamura - anime

The Haunting of Hill House by Shirley Jackson

Dark Tales by Shirley Jackson. Fave: "The Beautiful Stranger"

The Lottery and Other Stories by Shirley Jackson. Faves: "Like Mother Used to Make" and "Flower Garden"

Legend of Nezha (哪吒传奇) - the 2003 cartoon

Annihilation by Jeff Vandermeer

Jane Doe by Victoria Helen Stone

Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller

Lucie Babbidge's House by Sylvia Cassedy

The Goblin Emperor by Katherine Addison

Pinocchio (2022) - dir. Guillermo del Toro and Mark Gustafson

Bloodsucking Fiends by Christopher Moore

You Suck by Christopher Moore

Bite Me by Christopher Moore

Disliked and usually DNF

Guardian (cdrama)

The Gameshouse by Claire North

Kim's Convenience - show

Across the Green Grass Fields by Seanan McGuire

Victoriocity - podcast

Sporadic Phantoms - podcast

Guardians of Childhood series by William Joyce - okay I finished it out of loyalty but it was no rotg that's for sure

Iron Widow by Xiran Jay Zhao

Keep Your Hands off Eizouken - anime

Arcane - show

The Girl in the Flammable Skirt by Aimee Bender

Willful Creatures by Aimee Bender

The Color Master by Aimee Bender

Where the Drowned Girls Go by Seanan McGuire

Megan's Island by Willo Davis Roberts (reread)

First Light by Rebecca Stead

Goodbye Stranger by Rebecca Stead

The Apothecary by Maile Meloy

To Your Eternity - anime

Bloomability by Sharon Creech

Everything Everywhere All At Once (2022) dir. Daniel Kwan and Daniel Scheinert

Malevolent - podcast

Midnight Burger - podcast

Under the Whispering Door by TJ Klune

Sunshine by Robin McKinley

The Blue Sword by Robin McKinley

Carter & Lovecraft by Jonathan L. Howard

Swordspoint by Ellen Kushner

The Order of the Pure Moon Reflected in Water by Zen Cho

Black Water Sister by Zen Cho

M.E. and Morton by Sylvia Cassedy

Forty Stories by Donald Barthelme

Hangsaman by Shirley Jackson

The Bird's Nest by Shirley Jackson

The Ten Thousand Doors of January by Alix Harrow

The Witness for the Dead by Katherine Addison

The Stench of Adventure (podcast)

We Ride Upon Sticks by Quan Barry

Invisible Cities by Italo Calvino

Assorted nonfiction

Songs of the Gorilla Nation by Dawn Prince-Hughes

The Organized Mind by Daniel J Levitin - nothing new except for the part about using your spatial memory to hack organization.

The Art of Gathering by Priya Parker - how to organize social gatherings for meaningful and memorable experiences

Rust: the Longest War by Jonathan Waldman - investigative journalism book about corrosion, the hazard it presents to physical infrastructure, and how we mitigate it

Fall Down 7 Times, Get Up 8 by Naoki Higashida

Dear Friend, from My Life I Write to You in Your Life by Yiyun Li - DNF

The One-Minute Manager: The World's Most Popular Management Method by Ken Blanchard and Spencer Johnson - techniques for one-minute goal setting, one-minute praisings, and one-minute reprimands

The Chinese Language: Its History and Current Usage by Daniel Kane. Good concise history of the development of written Mandarin Chinese and the underlying structure of the characters.

A Sand County Almanac by Aldo Leopold - essays on the American landscape and conservation ethics ca. 1950. Neat from a historical standpoint, but nothing to write home about these days. Which kinda is the point I guess.

Oregon Salmon: Essays on the State of the Fish At the Turn of the Millennium, ed. Oregon Trout

Caring for your Parents by Hugh Delehanty and Eleanor Ginzler

The Man Who Mistook His Wife For a Hat by Oliver Sacks - DNF

The Grid by Gretchen Bakke - history of how the physical and regulatory infrastructure of the American power grid was developed, and how it needs to be reimagined for the future.

Wildlife Wars : The life and times of a fish and game warden by Terry Grosz. Tales from his career as a California game warden catching poachers.

The Undocumented Americans by Karla Cornejo Villavicencio. DNF. author's writing voice was supremely annoying

Wilderness and the American Mind by Roderick Nash, 3rd ed (1982) (reread) - history of Americans' changing attitudes towards nature and definitions of wilderness. A classic banger.

Black, Brown, Bruised: How racialized STEM education stifles innovation by Ebony Omotola McGee - good summary of what the successful programs for STEM students of color are doing right, everything else is the same old same old

Maybe You Should Talk to Someone: A Therapist, Her Therapist, and Our Lives Revealed by Lori Gottlieb. Account of the experience of going through therapy while working as a therapist. Excellent look at how we construct our personal narratives, and how to change them.

Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When the Stakes are High by Kerry Patterson, Joseph Gremmy, Ron McMillan, and Al Switzler. Strategies for having effective high-stakes conversations and managing your emotions. Good stuff.

Engineering and Social Justice by Donna Riley. Pretty entry-level, but it's a good bibliography for further reading.

Send in the Idiots by Kamran Nazeer

Why Are We Yelling? The art of productive disagreement by Buster Benson - DNF. disliked his writing style.

[manichewitz]

eddie munson can’t die in volume 2 bc he has to live to 1991 so he can hear metallica’s iconic banger Enter Sandman

[burningdarkfire]

the sandman thoughts (compiled from my drafts)

this show is soooooooooo profoundly british it's hilarious.

i feel like we are at a cultural moment where personifying concepts as just people is Not Very Cool (i would want them to be monstrous u know?) or perhaps i simply hate the actor’s face a little. intentional?

anyway my friend promised me the most pathetic sad man alive and you know what? he's right. we made it to episode 3 and not only is he pathetic and sad but he is annoying about it too which is exactly the kind of fucking combo that i love. when matthew was like yea boss i promise whatever they’re doing right now they’re not thinking about you and then it smash cut to the lesbians making out .. that’s humour

episode 4 with lucifer/gwendoline christie: an incredible banger i love her. also still being in love with someone after 10000 years? simp. putting her in hell and telling her he doesn’t forgive her? petty bitch. i love him

episode 5: honestly the slow roll was just toooooooooooo slow when it’s not doing anything new 

episode 6: yessss besties it’s time for the best episode of the show .. white men looking at each other!! pop the bottles we are shipping

episodes 7-8: something about the dialogue and rose's dialogue in particular is so stilted? so awkward. she talks way younger than 21

my interest fell off a cliff in the final arc and it took us like a month to finish the show after that. overall i liked it and i think dream is a great character and a great protagonist, but i feel like it wasn’t particularly well adapted to a tv season? i don’t want my tv shows to feel like comic books, i want them to feel like tv shows. the pacing in particular was very odd/bad for a tv season.

my friend gifted me the first volume of the comic so in theory i’m going to start reading them except that (oops) i don’t really like the art style so. we’ll see how far i get

[vgperson]

What Did I Translate in 2018?

[crosswhenandwhere]

Top 30 Most Underrated Albums!!

My top 30 favorite albums that I think are lovely and should be praised WAAAAY more than they are! Everything on here is great and I recommend all these albums!

30. Bon Iver - 22 A Million

Bon Iver takes his sound to the most experimental. Vocoder passages are super dope, 715 Creeks is an insanely underrated tune.

29. Siriusmo - Mosaik

Great kitschy synth music. Catchy, lighthearted, sweet and playful.

28. Bones - Useless

Best underground soundcloud rap album in my opinion. Cavernous, edgy, loud and depressing.

27. Mellowhype - Numbers

For an album with what I consider to be one of the best Frank Ocean features ever I hardly see it talked about in hip-hop circles. Great album.

26. Justice - Audio Video Disco

Grossly overshadowed by it’s monolithic older brother Cross, Audio Video Disco still serves bangers. Civilization is one of my top 10 songs of all time but On’n’on, Helix and New Lands should not be overlooked!

25. Gesaffelstein - Aleph

If I had to describe Aleph in a single word it would be brooding. Runners up include expensive, violent and scary.

24. Duck Sauce - Quack

If anything proves that we are long overdue for a full length A-Trak solo album, it’s this.

23. Yung Lean - Unknown Memory

Cloud rap pioneer Yung Lean’s opus. Volt, Sunrise Angel, Sandman and Blinded are all incredibly ahead of their time.

22. Playboi Carti - In Abundance

This one comes with a bit of a caveat considering it is a fan-compiled mixtape and not an official album but many of the songs on this project in my opinion stack up against highlights from S/T, Die Lit and WLR.

21. Dead Can Dance - Within the Realm of a Dying Sun

Referring to this album as moody and ambient don’t do it justice but for the sake of keeping  this list concise it will have to do. Dead Can Dance deserve the highest order of praise for this medieval epic.

20. Porches - The House

A melancholy and personal look into Porches frontman Aaron Maine’s experiences with social anxiety and depression. It’s groovy and will have you dancing with tears in your eyes.

19. Oni Ayhun - Oar003

Only two tracks long which makes it the shortest album on this list, Olof Dreijer of The Knife, under the pseudonym Oni Ayhun, makes curious, twinkling techno on Oar003.

18. Amnesia Scanner - Another Life

Abrasive and glitchy, german electronic duo Amnesia Scanner’s first album is not for the feint of heart but anyone who decides to keep an open mind (and the volume knob sitting lower than usual) will find some truly captivating moments of electronic brilliance on this record.

17. Mr Oizo - All Wet

Absolutely fucking hilarious album. With features from Skrillex, Boys Noize, Peaches and even Charli Xcx. All wet is modern dadaism and if you don’t believe me make sure you check out No Tony and Chairs in particular.

16. Crystal Castles - Amnesty (I)

I do not understand why this album isn’t  considered more when talking about Crystal Castles’ discography. It sounds related to their self titled trilogy but takes the band’s style in a less dance oriented, more experimental almost instrumental hiphop direction. Edith Francis’ vocals are great and the songs Ornament and Fleece stand out in particular, not to mention that the bonus track Kept may be one of the group’s best.

15. Simian Mobile Disco - Murmuations

Very low-key electronic music from Simian Mobile Disco, Murmurations features some flooring choral pieces backed by soft dance patterns. Great relaxing listen for fans of Caribou, Jamie XX and Chrome Sparks.

14. Mdou Moctar - Ilana (The Creator)

Where to even begin with this one! Mdou Moctar is a guitarist from Niger and Ilana (The Creator) is in my opinion his best work. Fuzzy rock music that sounds like it’s being played from 50-foot monitors in the middle of the Sahara.

13. Chemical Brothers - Further

Chemical brother’s second sleekest album after born in the echoes, Further has glamour that you’re seldom able to find elsewhere.

12. Boys Noize - Mayday

Absolute fucking rager of an album. Featuring Policia, Remy Banks and Hudson Mohawke among others, Boys Noize is in your face and doesn’t give a shit on Mayday. The remix of Birthday released after the album with Danny Brown is priceless.

11. Nico - Desertshore

Break out the tissues if you plan on listening to Desertshore today, this album is unrelentingly melancholic. Nico’s vocals sound almost ghost-like at times and the instrumentals on here are gorgeous.

10. The Newcomer - Earth Motivation

Sopping wet with OPN influence, Earth Motivation is glitchy but retains an emotional quality that will sit with you for a while after your first listen. Perfect for fans of Autechre, Oneohtrixpointnever and Venetian Snares.

9. Tami T - High Pitched and Moist

High Pitched and Moist is definitely not for everyone, but if you like your pop smeared with autotune and in-your-face sexuality then Tami T’s 2019 album is perfect for you! I recommend this one for any fans of Fever Ray and GFOTY.

8. Ryuichi Sakamoto - Async

From the jump, Japanese avant garde classical composer, pianist, electronic musician and synthpop legend Ryuichi Sakamoto hits you where it hurts on Async. The first tune Andata is one of the most beautiful and soul crushing instrumental songs I have ever had the pleasure of hearing, but the quality remains consistent throughout the entire record.

7.  Blanck Mass - World Eater

Holy. Fuck. Drop whatever you’re doing right now and listen to this album. I don’t care if you’re in a business meeting or getting lunch, World Eater demands the utmost attention. After hearing the transition from the end of Rhesus Negative to Please my life was never the same. I can’t sing Blanck Mass’ praises enough so you’re going to have to check this one out yourself but I guarantee you will NOT be disappointed.

6. Jean-Michel Jarre - Oxygene

French synth deity Jean-Michel Jarre’s intergalactic journey Oxygene is a record that soars above and beyond its compatriots (namely Mort Garson’s Plantasia and Jean-Jacques Perrey’s Moog Indigo) and will take you on an extra-planetary voyage from which you may never return. I recommend listening to this album with the best sound system you have available to really get the most out of it.

5. The Knife - Shaken-Up Versions

Technically The Knife’s last album before their retirement (not counting the Terminal 7 Live album), Shaken-Up Versions sees Karin and Olof Dreijer metamorphosing songs from all across their discography into dancefloor fillers. Electronic musicians retooling their material into more danceable, DJ set ready tracks is nothing new (See Alive 2007 and All Across the Universe) but the Knife’s catalog is already so impressive that hearing classics transmogrified like this is a phenomenal experience that I don’t want any dance music fans to miss out on! They reworked Silent Shout for christ’s sake how can you not love this.

4. Geinoh Yamashirogumi - Ecophony Rinne

Katsuhiro Otomo famously tapped Geinoh Yamashirogumi for the soundtrack to Akira, but what some of you may not know is that, while working on the Akira manga, Otomo was listening to this record in particular which inspired him to collaborate with the collective for the Akira film. Ecophony Rinne is like nothing I have ever heard before or since. It’s got a tectonic quality to it that makes you think you’re witnessing an extinction event or the birth of a new universe while listening which is an experience I highly recommend, ESPECIALLY for fans of the Akira manga and film; this album sounds like how Akira looks and Akira looks damn good.

3. Buy Muy Drugs - Buy Muy Drugs

Slept on in every regard, Buy Muy Drugs is a triumph of experimental and industrial hiphop. The duo made up of rapper Denmark Vessey and producer Azarias are welding together grime, bass music and afro-cuban percussion into a dystopic and pummeling listening experience that gets better and better with every listen. To quote JPEGMAFIA, “Death Grips can’t do this shit”.

2. Susumu Hirasawa - Technique of Relief

This album is jaw-dropping. It’s pop, ambient, traditional-Japanese experimental choral synth music delivered with soaring, regal grandiosity. One of the closest things to musical perfection I can think of, Technique of Relief is an album that even now I am having a difficult time describing. Intensely emotional yet hopeful; groovy but substantive, Susumu Hirasawa penned an oeuvre with this record.

1. Daft Punk - Human After All

The number one spot goes to the black sheep of the world’s most beloved electronic music making androids’ discography. Panned on release for being “spread thin” and “too minimal”, (The Village Voice went so far as to call the album “ a bad record whose details rarely merit further thought “) Daft Punk’s third album Human After all is definitely different from it’s rhinestone studded predecessor but in the absolute best way possible. It’s groovy, dark, emotional, tragic, minimal, distorted and it yields some of the robots’ best tracks (Human After All detractors seem to forget that Technologic, Robot Rock and the title track do not actually stem from the Alive 2007 Coachella set but rather find their home on this album). Sleeper gems like Make Love, Emotion, Television Rule the Nation and Prime Time of Your Life range from introspective and moody RnB that would not feel out of place on a Sebastien Tellier record to blown out, gravelly rock oriented tunes that remind the listener of Daft Punk’s roots as french garage rockers. Phenomenal album, criminally underrated.

[smocatoff]

Music Retrospective #1: Metallica

In 1981, Danish drummer Lars Ulrich put out an ad in a magazine known as The Recycler for a jamming buddy. The man who answered that add? James Hetfield. Lars then asked Metal Blade records founder Brian Slagel if he could record a song for their compilation album Metal Massacre. Slagel gave them the okay, and the rest they say is history.

Officially forming in October of that year, Metallica would go on to influence the next 30 years of hard rock and heavy metal. And in this review/retrospective of their staggering discography, I intend to give you my critical thoughts and personal take on one of the finest metal bands of all time, and one of the bands that inspired me to become a musician.

Ground rules before we get going: No live albums and no compilations. So no S&M, no Live Shit, no Garage Inc., you get the idea. First album up!

Kill ‘Em All

Starting out with bassist Ron Mcgoveny and shred master himself Dave Mustaine, Metallica enjoyed a fair amount of success on the club scene, and recorded some demos for Metal Blade Records, but due to drug problems and all around shitty behaviour, James and Lars gave Davey boy a bus ticket and told him to get out of the band, with McGovney leaving soon after. The line up that would grace the debut record Kill ‘Em All would be James, Lars, and new guitarist Kirk Hammet and bassist Cliff Burton. Oh boy, what a debut album it was.

Firing on all cylinders with scorching riffs and solos, this album provides you with some of the best 80s thrash metal that you can find. Kirk Hammett and James Hetfield provide blistering thrash metal guitar work, with some of the heaviest riffs and firey solos you can find. Further, the mastery of Cliff Burton’s bass work is on full display, most notably on the incredible solo known as “Anesthesia (Pulling Teeth)”. My personal favourite song would have to be the 7 minute biblical head banger, which Dave Mustaine would later perform on in its original incarnation on Killing is my Business (We’ll talk about that band another time), “The Four Horseman”. While a great album, it is certainly not a perfect one.

Kirk had been told to emulate Dave’s playing as much as possible during the recording of this album, and while stellar, it would pale in comparison to the unique style Hammett would eventually adopt later on. Moreover, I was never a big fan of lower quality, 80s thrash production style, so I was not the biggest fan of hearing James’ voice caked in reverb and the playing not as tightly knit as on later albums. Plus, the weakest song on the album has to be “Phantom Lord”. I’m sorry, but this is some weak ass, generic thrashy bullshit. Nothing memorable about that song.

Overall, an essential album for metal fans, and Metallica fans especially.

8.5 out of 10

Ride the Lightning

With thrash metal beginning to flourish in the early 80s with the likes of Slayer and Anthrax gaining prominence, as well as bands like Exodus and Sodom starting to form and get noticed, Metallica maintained its foothold atop the mountain and did so with 1984’s “Ride the Lightning”. Becoming more technical and pristine in their playing and production, Metallica evolved into the band we know and love on this album. Incorporating acoustic guitars, more complex arrangements, slower tempos, and providing some of the grandest sounding metal I have ever heard, Ride the Lightining is a treasure. From brooding ballads such as Fade to Black, the magnificent title track, the Hemmingway inspired anthem For Whom the Bell Tolls, this album features Metallica venturing into more morose and serious lyrical content, resulting in some of their best material ever. My personal favourite song, a little gem of a diddy known as “Escape”.

I doubt you could find a song you didn’t like on this album. Highly recommended. With Metallica getting this great, I don’t know how we’re going to top this album. But oh boy, do they ever top this album.

9.5 out of 10

Master of Puppets

In the year Nineteen hundred and eighty six of the common era, the gods bestowed upon us MASTER OF FUCKING PUPPETS. Good god. This. Fucking. Album. Easily Metallica’s most pristinely produced, tightly performed, and expertly written album. Evolving to combine the more progressive, grand arrangements of “Ride the Lightning” with the more straightforward, blistering thrash of Kill ‘Em All. Kirk Hammet and James Hetfield’s guitar work raging through with precision and soul, and Lars ripping out some of the most blistering drum work he has ever done, with Flemming Rassmusen and the band conjuring the most pristine and polished sound they could. There is a reason why this is regularly cited as one of the finest albums in metal history. Not a single bad song can be found on this album. Personal Favourite? Jesus god, throw a dart. But if I had to choose, I have always had a soft spot for the heavy as hell “The Thing That Should Not Be”.

This was the first Metallica album I heard, but even if you shed the nostalgia goggles and look at the album with critical eyes, you still find a towering classic of the genre. Unabashedly recommended, buy it yesterday. 

10 out of 10

...And Justice for All

Metallica has reached an all time high...but tragedy would strike, and take the band to a very personal low, as bassist Cliff Burton would pass away due to a bus accident on September 27th, 1986. With the tragic passing of Cliff Burton, Metallica was short a bassist. Enter Flotsam and Jetsam member Jason Newstead *cut to interview regarding Jason joining Metallica* With Newstead entering the picture, Metallica would then release the follow-up to the staggering Master of Puppets known as And Justice for All. Look, this is great album in its own right, but this album had to follow Master of Puppets. This album could not live up to such hype. But despite personal tragedy and a insurmountable challenge of trying to match, or even top, a bonafide masterpiece, Metallica managed to pump out a highly respectable album.

Continuing down the grander and more progressive road they had been travelling since Ride the Lightning, they also incorporated much darker and more brooding lyrics and guitar tones. This is no more exemplified by the song which resulted in Metallica’s first music video, the number one music video on MTV when it was introduced, and their first American hit on the Billboard Top 100, “One”.

While a very good album, Justice falls flat in certain respects. Firstly, while there aren’t necessarily bad songs on this album, some of the songs like “The Shortest Straw” and “Frayed Ends of Sanity” are a tad on the weaker side. Also, there’s the whole bass thing...so for whatever reason, whether it be as a form of hazing, or because of feelings regarding Cliff,  Lars told the album’s mixer, Steve Thompson, to lower the volume on the bass, and despite questioning this, he was made to do it anyways...Okay...

Really? Are you serious? Just because you’re “hazing the new guy”, or you miss your friend, or are just the self absorbed putz even Metallica fans know you to be, it doesn’t give you the right to pull childish bullshit like purposefully messing with the mix of a widely released album. Now, the other hazing bullshit, I don’t care about that. Pulling a rib on the boys can be light hearted fun, but when personal shit like that bleeds into your work and you leave an album without bass lines to properly fill it out, you officially become a prick. Despite me standing by his side for Napster (I’ll explain that thing another time), this is just juvenile. Luckily, a fan mix called “And Justice for Jason” remedied that, and allowed people to hear what Justice would have sounded like if it were properly mixed. Hell, despite Lars being a primadonna and taking certain things a bit too personally, Newstead has always remained fairly chill about the situation.

Overall, despite the bullshit with the bass mixing and some weak cuts, ...And Justice for All is a solid follow up to the towering classic that is Master of Puppets, and is definitely worthy of your collection. Recommended.

8.5 out of 10

Metallica (The Black Album)

With Newsted established as the band’s new bassist, and with song ideas brewing during their tour for Justice, Metallica hopped back into the studio with brand new producer Bob Rock, and popped out the highest selling record the band would ever produce, the self titled album commonly referred to as The Black Album. Lauded by many music publications, with 4s and 5s being thrown at it like Shibata throws out stiff kicks, everyone seemed to love it. However, does it truly live up to that acclaim? My answer: not quite.

Do not get me wrong, this is one of Metallica’s first five albums, so it’s a great fucking record. Pounding, groove laden metal riffs coupled with more melodic songwriting, it was a clear departure from the progressive, grandiose thrash metal of their previous 3 records, yet it still retained Metallica’s style and seminal songwriting. There are some superb cuts, with headbanging anthems like “Sad but True” and the smash hit “Enter Sandman” as well as my personal favourite hidden gem “Holier than Thou”, but there are some weaker, dare I say filler level cuts such as “Through the Never”.  Yeah, call me when your case of the word vomit ends guys. But overall, this is a stellar record and it is a very important benchmark for Metallica, as well as 90s metal. Moving on!

8 out of 10 

Load

Short haircuts? Check. New sound and experimentation with genres that alienates even the most steadfast of fan? Check. Trying even fucking harder this time for mainstream attention? Check. Yup, Metallica’s gone full fucking 90s on us. Load is for sure a weaker album than the Black Album, and it is full of hard rock snoozers like “Bleeding Me” and “Poor Twisted Me”, but when this album turns it up and actually goes, good god does it go. Hard rocking headbangers like “Ain’t My Bitch” and “Wasting my Hate” as well as more melodic, downpaced rock such as my personal favourite track “The House That Jack Built”, While the music may have mellowed out, Kirk and James’s guitar playing has not and they rip out some killer riffs on this record. Hell, even the really far out there experiments work very well, such as the pop-y sounding “Hero of the Day” and one of the best fucking modern, mainstream country songs ever “Mama Said”. Like, that is a sad statement on the genre when fucking Metallica outdoes the sorry excuses for country acts that were starting to permeate the genre in the 90s, and we are talking dick cheese such as Billy Ray Cyrus, Kenny Chesney, and all that shit.

Metallica’s “Load” is not for everyone, but if you look past and ignore all the 1st degree filler that is on this record, there are some superb cuts that rank among Metallica’s best work in my opinion.

6.5 out of 10

Reload

Metallica went into the studio to record Load and actually had enough material to fill a double album. Metallica decided to delay the release of a majority of this material in order to perfect it, and the result of this was 1997’s “Reload”. Continuing down the more commercial hard rock path they had started travelling, Reload offers, in my opinion, a more consistent and sonically pleasing offering than its predecessor. With alot of the grader experimentation from Load being scrapped, Metallica decided to unleash some pure fucking rock and roll, with James and Kirk throwing down headbanging riffs and Lars producing some memorable drum beats. With powerful hard rock beatdowns like “Fuel” and “Attitude”, as well as slower, more melodic and groove laden songs like “Devil’s Dance”, “Unforgiven 2” and “Where the Wild Things Are”. While this album is better than Load, it does have its share of filler like “Bad Seed” and “Slither”. My personal favourite song though has to be the somber ballad “Low Man’s Lyric”. While Reload is certainly not a return to form for the band, it is a more consistent and better offering than Load and certainly worth a listen.

Metallica wouldn’t release a proper studio album for another six years, releasing other offerings in the meantime, such as the cover album Garage Inc., as well as S&M, a live show Metallica did with a full symphony orchestra.  This period would also prove to be one of the most tumultuous times in the band’s career, which is expertly shown in the documentary “Some Kind of Monster”. During this harrowing period, bassist Jason Newsted left the band, citing creative and personal differences, including Jason’s want to do other projects. There was also...Napster...welp, we had to do it. Let’s talk about Napster 

Okay, so basic rundown of the issue. Metallica records a song entitled “I, Disappear” for the soundtrack of Mission Impossible 2. However, a demo of the song was leaked, and ended up getting radio airplay. The band was able to trace this leak back to a file found on Napster, which led them to also find out that all their shit was on Napster. Lars then filed a lawsuit, and after a whole giant legal battle involving Metallica and a ton of other artists, Napster was forced to file Bankruptcy and was shut down for good. People...did not like this. With people staging mass destructions of Metallica CDs, and many media outlets just roasting the fuck out of the band. It was not a pleasant time for the boys. Here’s the thing though. Amidst all the media hoopla and everyone jumping on the “fuck Metallica” bandwagon...the band was in the right. Firstly, Music is a business like any other, and while these artists do for the most part love what they do, they are in this to make a living out of it, i.e. MAKE MONEY. Piracy of music, while admittedly not a big blow to the artists, is still a blow to their profits. Could you blame someone for trying to take down something that was giving away their product for free without their permission? Secondly, a fucking DEMO was leaked. Meaning the song was in the rough stages of its production. It was like that unfinished version of X-Men Origins, or that trailer of The Mummy without all the sound effects. It doesn’t look good on the band, so you should obviously shut that down and shut it down fast. In summary, Metallica did nothing wrong and took down a program full of stolen shit, and people had a hissy fit about it because “muh free music!” Fuck those morons for not understanding how business works.

After the turbulent tides of this period had begun to subside, with James getting clean after a year of rehab, a new bassist being found in Rob Trujillo, and being honored on MTV Icons, Metallica would drop their next studio album and it would prove to be a return to form...sort of...not really.

7 out of 10

St. Anger

This album is one of the most reviled things in music history. Every fan, every critic pretty much hate this record and think it’s an abomination. But, and you’re probably gonna stop reading for this (you probably stopped after the Napster thing), I don’t think it deserves the shit it gets. Don’t get me wrong, 2003’s “St. Anger” is a flawed record for sure. From the odd production, guitar tones, drum sounds, and some of the most tedious songwriting Metallica has ever engaged in, this album is far from a masterpiece. But, that does not mean this is not devoid of highlights. Despite its repetitious nature, there are some gems on this record, and some great riffage from James and Kirk, plus Lars puts on an incredibly underrated drum performance. My personal favourite song has to be the badassery of a diddy known as “Shoot me Again”. This is not a great record, do not get me wrong. It’s arguably the weakest thing Metallica has ever done. but if you give it a chance, there are some solid gems on this record. With Metallica reformed, they would hold off another 5 years on a new record, but we did not expect the course correction that came.

6 out of 10

Death Magnetic

Welcome back, Metallica! With the band parting ways from Elektra records, Metallica was in need of a record label for their new album. Enter the legend known as Rick Rubin. Signing with Warner Brothers and hiring on Rubin as a producer (I use that term liberally by the way because Rubin doesn’t do much producing these days and leaves it up to his underlings), Metallica popped out the staggering comeback known as Death Magnetic. Released in 2008, this album proved to be Metallica’s best record since the Black Album, nixing the repetitive nature of St. Anger and returning to the more grandiose, progressive and technical thrash metal style that made them the legends they are. The guitar work on this album is superb, with James and Kirk laying down some excellent riffs and incredible guitar harmonies. This also proved to be a return to form for Lars Ulrich, laying down some of the most precise drum work he has ever done. My personal favourite song would have to be the insanely heavy instrumental, something that Metallica hasn’t done since Justice, the song known as “Suicide and Redemption”, which like “Call of Chuthlu” and “Orion” before it, served to show off the technical side of their bass player, and Rob Trujillo lays down some killer bass licks in this song. 

While this is arguably their best songwriting in many years, the production leaves a little to be desired, and that’s putting it nicely. The major culprit in all of this? Those fucking guitar tones. Like, what the fuck did you do? It sounds like a two chainsaws grinding against each other, and it splits your fucking ears. Like, listen to that album with good headphones and at a fairly high volume, it’s painful. But, see, here’s the thing. Slayer (A band we will be talking about in the near future), also had Rubin and his crew as producers for World Painted Blood, and it worked for Slayer because that suits their sound. This does not suit Metallica, and it fucking kills an otherwise excellent record. Despite the pitfalls in the production, Metallica’s “Death Magnetic” is a fantastic return to form, and will kick your ass. Buy this record.

With Metallica back on the rise, what new projects would await them? *Listens to Lulu*...DONE!

7.5 out of 10

Lulu

This album...is SHIIIIT. 2011’s collaboration with, of all fucking people, Lou Reed entitled “Lulu” is a failed experiment. Combining the styles of two artists, namely, the experimental, 60s and 70s rock music of someone like Lou Reed and the thrash metal headbanging of Metallica, they did not fit together at all. And listen here folks, collaborations between odd pairings of artists can work. Korn’s team up with various dubstep artists on The Path to Totality album generally was a solid effort by that band; David Bowie, being the musical chameleon he is, fit like a glove when Nine Inch Nails and him worked on remixing “I’m Afraid of Americans”; when Weezer and Lil Wayne teamed up to do “Can’t Stop Partying”...ok, point taken. But still, odd pairings in music can work. But this just didn’t. From the sloppy songwriting put forward by Metallica, to Lou Reed’s rambling street preacher vocal style which only works on certain songs, this album sounds like Lou Reed decided to just rant over a bunch of b-sides Metallica had left over and had no idea what to do with. I suppose if I had to pick a highlight from this album, it would have to be the 2nd last song “Dragon”, a heavy offering that actually manages to marry the styles of these bands quite effectively. But overall, just avoid this record, outside of hearing a couple songs. It’s not for Lou Reed fans, it’s not for Metallica fans, i’ts for no one. Say it with me homeboys, MOVING ON!

3 out of 10

Hardwired to Self Destruct

With the dogshit that is Lulu behind them, Metallica embarked on a few years of touring, playing pretty much nothing but old shit, playing for the first time with the big four, as well as doing fan requested setlists, it was time to head back into the studio and make some kick ass music. The result of this was last year’s Hardwired to Self Destruct. This album is both stronger and weaker than Death Magnetic. It is stronger in that it is much more tightly produced, with those chainsaw guitars being replaced with a more crisp sounding tone more in line with their previous output. With the band getting up there in age, they however show no signs of slowing down, with James’ voice not showing an instance of faltering since blowing it out all those years ago. Further, the guitar work on this album is superb, and Lars lays down some tight and precise drumming. However, this album isn’t the tightest in terms of songwriting, and begins to falter around the end of disc one and by disc two they let out some grade A filler like “Man-Unkind”. Yeah, this song sounds like they’re trying to hearken back to the days of Load with this one, and those days are gone and should stay gone. But this album is not devoid of highlights, with my personal favourite track being the cybernetic dystopian fury of the closing song “Spit Out The Bone”. Hell, the first disc on this album fucking slays, with tracks like “Moth Into Flame” and the grandiose, almost Maiden-esque “Atlas Rise.” Overall, a solid album full of really heavy songs, but the band’s age is showing, and the idea well is starting to run dry. It might be time to hang it up. But we’ll see.

7 out of 10

Well, I thank you for reading this tirade about one of my favourite bands of all time, the incomparable Metallica. Hope you have a good day.