#being cat called and getting a “EW NEVERMIND” when you turn around

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

Dancing 'til the Break of Dawn - Pt 21

<Pt20

(TWST Zombie apocalypse AU where Yuu beast tames just a little too close to the sun)

“Can’t believe I showed you around the whole complex and you didn’t even pay attention!” Azul said.

Yuu lifted his hands in a shrug. “It’s not like it’ll matter.”

The twins didn’t seem to care if Yuu, nicely put, took himself off the census, so he doubted he would be allowed to walk around freely.

Frankly, he was pretty sure that the only reason he was allowed to walk around now was because Jade and Floyd were too busy torturing his friends for the high crime of Being Yuu’s Friends to remember that Yuu himself existed.

He wasn’t sure how long that would last.

He worried his lip.

And then he pulled a cigarette box from his pocket. It was Deuce’s. Yuu had never given the boy any, so it was still full. There was a splatter of blood across the already red packaging from one of the many times Yuu had been injured.

He shook a cigarette out and brought it to his lips, flicking his lighter to light it.

He had no intentions of breathing it in. In fact, doing so would defeat the purpose of this:

Establish a pattern.

If he inhaled, he’d start coughing, and that would be… well, an indication that he didn’t do this often. And embarrassing, which was far more of a problem, in Yuu’s eyes.

“That stressed already?” Azul said, looking a little too pleased about it. The dickhead.

Yuu smiled, and it was real, because he was more than happy for any excuse that would get the cigarette out of his mouth, if even for a moment. “This isn’t my first rodeo. And, y’know, I was starting to miss my old arson days, I’m glad to have an excuse to do it again.”

Azul’s smug little smile dropped.

“Please don’t burn down my mall. Do you know how long it took to get this place functional?!”

“Don’t give me a reason to burn the place down, and I won’t,” Yuu said. “It’s really that easy.”

“You know it’s not.”

“Get your dogs on leashes. I’m a cat person, you know?”

~

They were in the room that Yuu was sure he wouldn’t see the outside of for quite some time.

At least there was a window, this time.

Azul was already preparing to leave. But he hesitated, his hand in the doorway.

He turned to look at Yuu.

Yuu had flopped on the floor to inspect the carpet, stunned to find that there were no hints of blood among the white. Who cleaned this (because Yuu needed to ensure their pay was, at the very least, doubled)? Was it, somehow, untouched? Wild.

“How are you so calm about –? Nevermind. You’re clearly insane. Pro tip: if you want Jade and Floyd to not kill you, make sure they’re never bored.”

Yuu looked up just long enough to flash a wink his way.

“Who could ever get bored of me?”

~

The second Jade appeared in the doorway to Yuu’s house, he held a hand out for Yuu’s lighter.

Yuu smiled sweetly, batting his eyelashes. “You’re gonna have to fight me for it.”

He barely even got the sentence out before a fist came sailing for his head.

Yuu stumbled back, his eyes wide. He really hadn’t expected Jade to call his bluff.

But, hey, Yuu never really got to fight… anything, really, anymore! Who knows! Maybe attempted murder could be fun, if your target is literally unkillable!

He pulled a knife from his pocket and launched himself at Jade.

~

Yuu, of course, lost. He, frankly, wasn’t willing to risk popping the stitches in his shoulder again, because Ace and Deuce would never let him hear the end of it if they found out… and also, ew, pain, or something.

So, he got his ass handed to him. He was definitely going to have a few bruises in the morning.

On the bright side, though, Yuu got to stab Jade a few times. Which is basically free therapy. Stab any ‘Jade’s in your life to cancel your prescription to Mental Illness today!

Wait, he’d had a goal with all of this, hadn’t he?

He turned onto his side to face Jade. “Can you guys at least light my cigarettes for me?”

Jade raised an eyebrow, amused. “And since when have you taken a liking to smoking?”

“Very recently,” Yuu said, smiling innocently.

Jade smiled. It was an unnatural smile, stretching too wide on his face. The kind of smile zombies wore when they had just set eyes on their newest prey.

Jade didn’t trust him in the slightest.

But, apparently, he was into that:

“If that’s what you need to live comfortably, we would be more than happy to provide that for you,” Jade said. “... so long as you do not do anything idiotic, I don’t see the harm in providing you with small things like this.”

Yuu raised an eyebrow. “What would I even do? Swallow a flaming cigarette whole?”

“... you see, you have managed to come up with something far beyond anything I could imagine in a mere few seconds, and this is not instilling me with faith.”

“Shutting up now!”

~

Yuu blinked as he stepped out of the bathroom, and found Azul there.

Jade and Floyd were also there, but that, at least, was expected. They were zombies, they slept with Yuu – they slept in the same bed as Yuu, sorry, Yuu wouldn’t want anyone to get the wrong idea. Lord knows he got enough of that shit from Ace.

Regardless, the symbiotic nature of Yuu’s relationship with zombies was irrelevant. Azul was here and it was weird.

He frowned at Jade. “What’s he doing here? Aren’t we going to bed?”

Jade smiled. “Of course, a good night’s rest is vital for one’s health.”

“... you didn’t answer my first question, not sure if you noticed!”

“I did.”

“Floyddddddd,” Yuu whined, spinning on his heel to look at Floyd instead. “Heeeeelp.”

Floyd lifted Yuu off of his feet.

Hm.

“It’s my shoulder that’s injured, not my legs,” Yuu said, his patience already straining. It was day three, and actually using those cigarettes was becoming more and more tempting by the hour.

“I know!”

Yuu sighed through his nose. Loudly. Frankly, it didn’t sound much different than the scream he was suppressing, just a little quieter.

Thankfully, no one acknowledged it.

Unfortunately, this was also infuriating in its own right, so Yuu really wasn’t getting any wins here.

He looked at Azul. “Has anyone ever bitten them out of spite before? Because it’s really tempting.”

“I’ve considered it,” Azul admitted.

“You could always be the first, Yuu-chan!” Floyd said.

Yuu glared up at him. He would not be tricked into becoming inhuman, thanks.

Unfortunately, Floyd just seemed to think this was cute, because he pressed a kiss to Yuu’s forehead and squeezed him just a little tighter.

Yuu stabbed his knife into Floyd’s shoulder.

Which made his entire arm spazz out for a second. So, Yuu went crashing to the floor.

Yuu suffered. Every day. All the time.

Maybe this is why you don’t stab the people who are carrying you. An important thing to remember for later.

He sighed, pushing himself up to sit. At least the carpet cushioned his fall. A little. Like, marginally.

“Why are you here, senpai?” Yuu asked.

Azul hesitated, briefly, shuffling from one foot to the next. “Well, running a society is somewhat time-consuming, and I, occasionally, forget to sleep.”

“‘Forget’,” Jade said. He didn’t actually scoff, but the feeling of a scoff was definitely there.

Azul pulled his glasses down so he could glare at Jade. Yuu’s gaze caught on the dark bruising beneath his eyes.

“How do you forget to sleep for, like, three days in a row?” Yuu said.

Now Azul was glaring at him, too. Fun.

(It actually was a little funny, watching Azul’s head spin on a swivel so he could continually glare at either Jade or Yuu.)

Floyd rested his chin on Yuu’s good shoulder, smiling widely. “Exactly. So, since he’s stupid and can’t take care of himself, we take care of him instead!”

Yuu just nodded along. This all checked out. He still wasn’t sure why Azul was here, though.

“Now,” said Jade, placing his hands delicately on Azul’s shoulders before pushing him over, sending him toppling into the bed. “Sleep.”

Oh. Ohhhhhh.

If Azul wasn’t going to sleep, then Jade and Floyd were going to make him sleep. And the only way they could do that was if Azul was in the same bed as them.

Which would be fine. If Yuu wasn’t also, according to Zombie Law, forced to sleep in the same bed as any zombies who were currently watching over him.

“I’ll sleep on the couch!” Yuu said hastily. “It’s within view, so you guys don’t have to –!”

Arms wrapped around his waist from behind, lifting him just far enough off of the ground that he couldn’t get enough leverage to run away.

He went for his knife, but found his pocket already empty.

Damn it. He’d already used the stab Floyd in the shoulder trick once before! They were wise to it, now! Nooooo!

Despite their struggles against The System, it wasn’t long before Yuu and Azul were forced to lay beside each other in bed, as stiff as boards despite the two zombies wrapped around them.

Said zombies were openly staring at the two humans in their arms. Which is fun. You know, ever since Yuu was a little boy, he had always thought that the thing that would make sleep easier was two sets of eyes on him while he was trying to relax! So, really, he was having the time of his life right now!

(At least Grim had the decency to pretend to sleep.)

Yuu looked at Azul.

“If you have a nightmare I’m making you deal with it on your own.”

Azul’s eyes narrowed. “You’re such a disrespectful junior.”

“I am not doing any of the ‘there was only one bed’ tropes.”

~

“This place smells like an ashtray,” Azul commented when he stepped inside a few days later, his nose wrinkling.

Frankly, Yuu agreed. He tried to stay in the corner, to keep it as far away from where people actually lingered as he possibly could, but that wasn’t really how air worked…

He looked at the ceiling, and realized there was a thin layer of smoke over the whole room. Honestly, he’d barely even noticed. Dully, he wondered if he was slightly high. He had been trying to not inhale anything, because a cigarette addiction didn’t sound particularly easy to deal with, but… well, he was certainly calmer than he should be when cooped up like this.

He shook his head to clear it, and took a moment to recall what the conversation had been about. He really was high, huh?

Whatever.

“Certain people won’t let me open the window.”

Jade and Floyd sported infuriating smiles.

“I do not smell anything,” Jade said.

“You don’t breathe,” Azul hissed.

“We can breathe if we want to,” Floyd said, doing an exaggerated inhale –.

And then he erupted into a coughing fit.

“Ha!” said Azul. “Told you!”

Needless to say, Yuu was now allowed to open the window to smoke.

(If, privately, he missed the high, and maybe ‘accidentally’ breathed in cigarette smoke every once in a while, then that was no one’s business but his own.)

~~~~~

Pt22>

[braincoins]

Castlevania 3 Liveblog

I dumped all of this on @toxicure because they were asleep and then I decided to dump it all on all of you. 

Minor spoilers occasionally, but most of it is out of context babbling.

and now to make cryptic non spoilery comments while you sleep

such as:

Awww

and

EW

and

Oh, I was wondering about THAT. WELL THEN.

oh, someone's done well for themselves

I'm glad to see Treffy's friends continue to treat him ...well. >_>

and that Treffy continues to be a stranger to soap and water

"scribal skills" I'ma put that on my business cards

oh he gets a THE now 

Fancy fancy

OH THAT'S A MEME IMAGE

never ever thought I'd say this but I agree with Trevor

also, so many people this season who are like, "I have no name. Call me The ___"

maybe THAT'S where the "the" came from!

oh that explains Mr. Freaky Eyes then

I LOVE HER

LOVE HER

"you saw that I have a knife, right?" Oooooh someone getting snarky

y'know, for a show that's so blatant about murder and gore and violence, they're SUPER squeamish about any sort of nudity

wait that might've been a sliver of penis! QUICK GET THE BELMONTS HERE STAT!

oh, yeah, nevermind, they're getting less squeamish about it all the time

OMG THEY FOUND THEM

lesbians

is... is that one dude masturbating?

oh no it's just crazy rocking okay nevermnind

wait shit I'm starting to agree with Crazy McFuckoEyes

In this episode we find out Trevor is not stealthy

AND SYPHA IS FUCKING AMAZING but we knew that but SERIOUSLY I LOVE HER

well. talk about being a slave to fashion

Isaac would be one hell of a Pokemon Master. 

Like no one ever was.

Remind me never to put my elbows on the table or use the wrong fork. o.O

I really really really wish Alucard were here for this moment. xD

Oh, well, at least SOMEONE walked in on this self-pitying monologue

also, no surprise it was HER idea because she's awesome

what a leaden town [ba-dum TISH!]

no but seriously are they gonna try to turn it into gold?

Sypha is ENJOYING this

i love her SO MUCH my heart's gonna explode

I can't wait to see the Ifso Factso of this

OMG HE'S TOTALLY ADOPTED THEM

[snerk] wow, whipped and he KNOWS it

and speaking of whipped men...

aaaaaaand someone's just developed a BDSM kink

oh well there's where the effects budget went

the cows are like 'dude you took SO MANY SHROOMS'

Oh, and in case you forgot, Warren Ellis thinks Christianity should Aria of Swallow His Dick

omg they're a mood

also can I just say that I support guys wearing crop tops?

OMG STOP TOYING WITH MY HEART WARREN ELLIS

BELNADES AND BELMONT

also. ALSO. I want to know what Jason Isaacs thought when he was given THAT LINE.

"Okay, okay, we want you to say this the same way you'd say 'MUGGLES' or 'MUDBLOODS' or..." "Look, I did movies other than those ones. You know that, right?" "Yeah, yeah, sure whatever, just say it like MUDBLOODS." "Ugh." "YES, LIKE THAT!"

Oh no, no, no, hon. You haven't just felt useless. You've been useless.

Useless, but hot [fans self]

uh oh. See, I knew not to like that dude.

OKAY THAT IS FUCKTASTIC.

Castlevangelion?!

I SWEAR TO SYPHA IF THEY HURT HIM....

[snort] Dude is not used to being helped; Treffy is not used to helping people, it's awkward for everyone involved here.

TREFFY IS A CAT PERSON CONFIRMED

SERIOUSLY.

You thought TREVOR was the main character of "Castlevania"?

Trevor Belmont, last son of the House of Belmont: I am the main character. Sypha Belnades: [clears throat] Trevor: What? I am. Sypha: [gives him a Look (TM)] Remember that sex you were hoping to have? Trevor: No, no, you're right, she's right, Sypha's the main character. Sypha: Good brain-damaged servant. ^_^ You can have a beer now. Trevor: Thank God. Sypha: And after the beer, you can go punch some monks. Trevor: YESSSSSSSSS. And, uh... after the beer and monk-punching? [hopeful grin] Sypha: [looks him up and down] After the beer, the monk-punching, and a BATH. Trevor: Absolutely.

"I'm... I'm pretty?" This is a man who has never looked in a mirror.

Look, in Castlevania-land you're either pretty or you're some sort of horrible freak, man-wise. That's really the only two options.

You're Dracula or you're Godbrand. That's it.

omg he's pretty AND stupid

Okay I think the main message of s3 is "Men are stupid and need women to set them straight. Just be careful what KIND of woman you're obeying totally and entirely." I might be reading into things a bit. I mean, there's also... y'know... the entire rest of the plot.

wow that random guard dude has NO sword discipline whatsoever. Just waving a sword around like that? You'll take someone's knees off! Probably the guard dude in front of you!

the FUCK was that shot? It looked like we had claymation from a British kids' show for a second there

omg how are you THIS DUMB

does... does he wear a nightgown?

loosely laced like that, too?

damn, you little slut fodder for fanartists says what?

oh no. oh NO.

oh MY.

I LITERALLY JUST CHOKED ON MY COCOA

holy hell where'd she get those tits from? She must've been binding like HELL. HOW COULD YOU BREATHE?!?!?!

we're hopping between 4 different scenes: 2 are violence and 2 are sex. And I just KNOW that Pengy's gonna wake up and come out during a sex bit. I JUST KNOW IT

okay that's... that's like Katamari Hellmacy I guess 'cause What the FUQ

IT'S RAININ' MEN!

SING IT, ISAAC

Okay, look. We get to see all THIS sex, but we didn't get to see the one we REALLY WANTED? Like. Mr. Ellis. My Dude.

you're immortal and you never, in all that time, learned any combat skills? Not even in self-defense?

Isaac still leading the way in Forgemaster Fashion tho

does that thing have an eye in its crotch? Eye vagina. Vag-eye-na

OH FUCK YES LOOKIT MY BABE GO

the weird super smoothed-out combat animation is trippy tho

I have a THEORY there but I left it out 'cause I'm trying to keep the spoilers to a minimum

OH NO! THE MAD STRAWBERRY LORD TRIUMPHS?!?!?

OR NOT!!

I KNEW IT

oh no oh no I KNEW it

[has to actually clap hand over mouth so as not to wake husband]

you know... on one hand, if I'D been running this show, I'd've made that the last shot of the season because I'm an evil bitch. on the other hand, THANK SYPHA THAT IS NOT THE LAST SHOT OF THE SHOW

HELL YES THAT PIECE OF DIALOGUE

the fuck

WHERE DID YOU SEND THAT KID?! O_O

LEVEL UP! NEW SPELL UNLOCK!

DRAMATIC ORGAN MUSIC SAYS YOU'RE FUCKED?!?!?!

omg

will you two just go home and fuck Alucard already?

apparently everyone who dies goes to Hell.

Just. Just straight up.

ok but seriously dude the kid's okay?

OMG YOU FUCKER

good Treffy smart Treffy

[snerk] Carmilla and the lesbians like "TMI TMI TMI"

oh no honey you're not a SLAVE, you're a PET.

That's SO MUCH BETTER

and... wow. Okay. So. Yeah. Honoring our families again, I see. Yay.

THE END.

[the-last-magpie]

“Lincopia, you’ve got mail” A Ghost Fanfiction

So: this is a very light kind of fanfiction. It is based on the daily life of the members of the church (ghouls, sisters, brothers, papas, clergy), and it is set at the beginning of era III (yeah I know, sounds nostalgic but I had a lot of this stuff on my mind for months). This is meant to be humorous (with some romance in the future).

Why “You’ve got mail”? 

Because this is a fic about the members of the church talking to each other about their sheningans and daily life through messages, WhatsApp or something. There are also some pieces of actual writing here and there, but I have to add, English is not my mothertongue, so I apologize for any mistake, of any kind. I hope to entertain you.

First Chapter.

Enjoy!

-          11.02 am

It wasn't his fault, and that was a concept well punctuated by the calmness of his stride, even if a little stompier than the usual, because, well, being in his actual position made him nervous after all. He already knew it: there was no one left in the chapel. He was late for sure, and the ceremony had gone without him, he, practically an ambassador for their image, and the new pope was around, and Sister Imperator too, probably left scolding at the air since, again, he had not been there.

Special sighed. There he was, hand on the big handle, heavy door ajar.

Just silence and emptiness.

"Uhh... This sucks".

  -          1.17 pm

Message from Mist:

Special. Ceremony was great. You'd have loved that. The guy talks more than you do. You'll get along well. He won't skin you alive, don't worry. Probably just make you feel like he could though.

Message from Cat boy:

Very funny. I wasn't fooling around, I had stuff to do, a flight to take. The new Papa was informed. I'll go knock on his door later. But anyways, what did you mean by that? The skinned alive bit?

Message from Mist:

It's okay. He is ok. Well, I mean. He's not his brother.

Message from Cat boy:

Enlightening. Look, can we talk on WhatsApp? Who uses messages nowadays? Just install it. It's useful.

Message from Mist:

We have very different jobs kitty. I don't need WhatsApp. Also weren't you going to knock on a door? What, you need a push?

Message from Cat boy

Thank you very much Mist. On my way.

PS: DO NOT CALL ME THAT.

Message from Mist:

Love you. ♥

PS: bring the lube.

Message from Cat boy:

...what?

  -          5.38 pm

When Special walked out the office, he stood still two steps away from the closed door, very quiet, very collected. Looking into space. He looked down at his hands, now full. There were his new robes. Very much practical indeed, and he had already seen them some weeks ago when he himself helped the sewing department, launching some ideas. The mask, that was Omega’s idea.

He looked away, sensing the calmness of the twilight, when people retired from the greenhouses and the fields, the various offices, the library, and showering or maybe simply taking a rest before dinner. He listened to that, the silence, recalling the previous minutes. The man was… he had no idea. Mist had been right. He was not his brother. He seemed cheerful, not so talkative as stated, very stern sometimes, but always with a light, imperceptible smirk at the corner of his lips. He had tried to make him uncomfortable, Special was sure of that. Didn’t even mentioned the fact that he had missed the ceremony for his election. The pope had stared at him, looking him in the eye, with that mix of unknown intentions behind his mismatched ones, and then went straight to business.

So he sighed. Alpha would keep doing interviews, of course. Maybe one, or two every century, by the sound of it. Omega was in charge of a lot of things, and always moving around departments because he was that charismatic. So sure, he would help Special.

But Special was now officially in charge of everything connected to the public. He would be the first in line at concerts, at promotional events, radio interviews, normal interviews, every interview. He would talk to companies, bands touring with them, some lesser members of the clergy (because the big pieces were for Papa, of course) and simply do everything that connected with the core of their engine. He started counting the number of plane he’d have to meet closely from that moment on.

He started walking towards the dormitory, very determined to just fall face deep in the mattress and woke up the next century.

  -          7.22 pm

WhatsApp Chat Group: Feel Ya Sista

Lumia: Guuuuurls

Maery: what?

Lumia: Are you done with the dinner? WE HUNGRY HERE, you know.

Ambrosia: oi, let us work. you’re not the only ones that do things in here, YOU KNOW.

Lumia: I plow the soil from which your damn food comes from. Chop chop.

Mitra: SHUT UP LUIAMN

Lumia: ??

Ambrosia: do you grow cheese from that soil? ham? entire cows? last time I checked, those grew from the truck of the dairy we actually buy from.

Valeriana: Also, let us work. Cirice told us Papa himself is going to dine with us in the hall tonight. We are pretty under the gun rn.

Lumia: NO WAY.

Maery: eh

Lumia: Wtf is the world going to end, this is a first

Era: my life is going to end.

Lumia: You alright?

Era: No. This morning I noticed a mistake I made on Papa’s alb. Every time he flapped that sleeve a year of life left me. The moment he’s gonna notice he gonna suck my very soul out of me.

Mitra: overreacting

Lumia: What mistake? I saw none

Era: I sewed too tight in a place.

Maery: c’mon

Era: AND THE MITRE TOO. The patch is too much on the right. HE GONNA KILL ME.

Mitra: OVERREACTING

Ambrosia: he’s nice, stop worrying

Era: HE HAS THE SAME BLOOD OF THAT MUSSOLINI IN HIM. HE’S A TICKING BOMB, I TELL YOU.

Valeriana: Girl, you talked to him for 30 seconds.

Era: Is there some wine left yes? Because I need it.

Maery: yeah

Ambrosia: i’m turning off my phone. work. see you all at 8.

Era: Don’t leave me…

Lumia: I’m still here

Lumia: Nope, nevermind, I actually have to go to the toilette

Era: Can’t you bring your phone in there?

Lumia: I use it for music

Maery: era stop, or i’ll send scary omega to your chamber

Era: …that isn’t exactly a threat. I fyou know what I mean…

Valeriana: Lmao.

Rita: uuhhhmmm

Rita: girls

Maery: yeah?

Rita: talking about subtext…

Maery: yeah?

Rita: …is it okay if I say I wanna bang him?

Valeriana: Bang WHO.

Lumia: Omega?

Rita: nope

Ambrosia: RITA NO

Lumia: Werent’ you turning off your phone?

Ambrosia: RITA NO

Ambrosia: NO

Ambrosia: wait AT LEAST a week. Ffs.

Maery: also ew

Rita: ok.

Maery: imam send you scary imperator to your chamber

Era: THAT INDEED IS A THREAT.

Ambrosia: ENDING ALL TRANSMISSIONS, NOW. SEE YOU AT 8. BEHAVE, OK? Y’ALL HEATHENS.

Maery: yes ma’am

Lumia: Toilette

Era: dying

Rita: ok.

Rita: …

Rita: …a week is a lot

Ambrosia: RITA NO

   -          8.29 pm

Alpha: Dude, where are you?

-          8.37 pm

Alpha: Seriously.

-          8.43 pm

Alpha: OMEGA the new Papa is here with us. Where the fuck are you?

   -          0.31 am

Omega: Bro, I was busy. I am always busy. What’s the matter. Special missed his ceremony, I missed dinner, so the real loss here is that I’m hungry as fuck.

Alpha: What was so important?

Omega: Fucking haunted trees? You know, those who started slapping people with their branches last week? One of them lifted a root and was trying to actually take a step.

Alpha: Are you high?

Omega: I wish I was.

Alpha: SERIOUSLY.

Omega: Look, this place is a mess. We are not just some campy satanists, we attract some attentions.

Alpha: So what, local flora is pissed off because we worship the big bad guy?

Omega: Most likely someone enchanted things. But it’s okay now. I had to work with that nerd of Brother Euthanasia, just because Imperator couldn’t make a bad impression on our CEO.

Alpha: That would explain why she was so edgy all dinner.

Omega: And when exactly she is not.

Alpha: Whatever.

Omega: Besides, was he pissed?

Alpha: He didn’t even notice.

Omega: So what.

Alpha: MAYBE he just looked not pissed.

Omega: Tomorrow I’m gonna buy him flowers and take a knee okay? Or maybe next time I’ll invite fucking trees at our table so we can go all Isengard with that.

Alpha: Dude, chill. Or eat. You’re not yourself when you’re hungry.

Omega: FUNNY.

Alpha: Yeah. Take a rest, you big idiot. Tomorrow we have to do things.

Omega: And don’t I know that.

Alpha: Take a rest. Love you.

Omega: …gay.

Omega: …Love you too.

(All original characters belong to the band Ghost.

OCs are mine.

Feedback and critics [corrections too if needed] are always appreciated!)

[such-a-common-girl]

“Family” Part Two

Words: 1,581

Norman Reedus x Daughter Reader

Warnings: Swearing

Link to part one

“You have got to be kidding me.” Anna showed up at my doorstep. It had been a few days since my encounter with my dad. I haven’t seen him since, he had to fly to San Diego for Comic Con, but he’d be back next week.

“Anna? What are you doing here? We don’t usually meet until seven.” I say, looking at the clock. It was barely six in the morning- the sun wasn’t even up yet.

“I told you to watch The Walking Dead, not have coffee with Norman fucking Reedus!” Her eyes are wide.

“How do you know about that?” I questioned her, letting her come inside. She obviously wasn’t leaving.

“Have you been online lately?”

“No, I’ve been busy trying to finish my homework. AP Calculus is kicking my ass. But that doesn’t answer my question.”

“Search up Norman on Google. Look at the recent media posts about him.” She looks at me weirdly. I pull out my phone, typing in his name. I gasp at the results- there were pictures of the two of us drinking coffee together, being swamped by fans, and getting into the taxi together. The headlines were worse. ‘Norman’s new woman?’ ‘Hot young girl getting coffee with Norman Reedus- See the pics!’ ‘Norman is dating a mystery girl!’

“Oh my god.” I want to scream.

“I just want to know how the fuck you managed to score him! I’ve been trying to get his attention through Twitter forever.” She seemed frustrated.

“Ew, listen, I did not ‘score him.’ We’re not, like, together.” I try to say calmly.

“I don’t understand.”

“Look, if I tell you something, you can’t tell a soul.” I tell her.

“Swear.”

“He’s my dad.”

“No way.” She shakes her head. “You’re lying.”

“I’m not. I just found out.”

“Wow.” She seems like she can’t figure out what to say. “Okay.”

“It’s a lot to process, I know. Trust me.” I grab some water from the kitchen.

“I don’t understand why you wouldn’t want to tell people.”

“People are going to treat me differently. I don’t want people to want to be my friend just because I have a famous dad.” I admit.

“Oh, hun.” Anna laughs. “People are going to treat you differently regardless. They think you two are, like, dating.”

-

I underestimated his fame.

People stopped me on the streets while I walked to school, asking me questions about my “relationship” with my father. I ignored them and just kept walking, but people still looked at me funny. The whole day throughout school, everyone looked at me weird. Some girls looked jealous, other disgusted. Most of the guys just smiled at me.

“So, dating a big shot, huh?” One of my soccer teammates came up to me in the locker room after practice. “I’m jealous. He’s like a sex god.”

I looked at her in disgust before slamming my locker door, walking away.

“Hey, Y/N, I’m sorry, that wasn’t supposed to make you mad.” She followed me.

“We’re not dating. Not even close. So please leave me alone.” I say with attitude, opening the door and walking outside. “And feel free to tell everyone else that. I’m tired of being stared at.”

I get in bed as soon as I get home, exhausted. All I want to do is talk to my mom, but she’s nowhere to be seen. I grab my phone, going through my twitter feed. It’s filled with people talking about me. Shocker. I don’t even read them. They’re probably just more bullshit rumors.

I was about to shut it off when a new post pops up- a video from the San Diego Comic Con. I click on it, seeing that it was the Walking Dead’s con. It starts off with the announcer talking to my dad, who is not paying attention to him at all. My dad was too busy messing around with the guy who’s name tag says “Andrew Lincoln.” I frown, realizing that this was the guy who I’ve been telling Anna is hot for ages, and he’s seemingly my dad’s friend. Crush gone.

“Norman, we’ve got a question from a fan.” The announcer says, and my dad starts paying attention.

“Hi, Norman! We’ve been all wondering- who was that girl you were with a few days ago?” This blonde lately asks.

“She’s my daughter.”

The crowd goes crazy. I guess they didn’t know I existed.

“You have another kid besides Mingus? What’s her name?” A fan yells from the crowd.

“I don’t know if she’s comfortable with me telling the world that.”

Then the screen cuts black, and the video is over. Half of me is glad he told everyone, so people will stop looking at me like I’m some huge seventeen year old slut dating an older guy. But another half of me is upset. My life is about to change dramatically. Suddenly, I’m not just Y/N anymore. People are going to look at me and just see Norman’s daughter.

I pull out my phone and call my dad.

“What’s going on?” He answered. There was talking in the background, like he was out with friends or something.

“I can call you later if you’re busy.”

“Give me a minute.” He says to someone in the background, and then the noise stops. “Sorry, all the cast members and I are together in the hotel room. Celebrating for the last night of being here.”

“Don’t apologize. I just needed to talk to someone. My mom’s not here, and I’m just super stressed out. People are stopping me on the streets and taking pictures of me. Everyone at my school are treating me weird. I don’t know what to do.” I sigh.

“Hey, look, I go through this all the time. So did Mingus. It’ll die down eventually.”

“Mingus?” I question.

“Yeah, I uh, I have another kid.”

“You’re a busy man.” I joke.

“Shut up.” He laughs. “You know, I fly back into New York tomorrow morning. Why don’t you come stay with me for a few days? I don’t have much to do, but I got a cat and a bunch of South Park recorded on TV if you’re into that thing.”

“I have school.”

“I live in a different borough, not a different state. You can still get to school. Hell, it’s only for a few days, you could skip school if you wanted and we could actually hang out. I don’t have long until I have to fly back to Atlanta to film.” He drove a hard bargain.

“Fine.” I finally say. “Can you just pick me up after school tomorrow? I don’t want to have to walk all the way home just to have to leave again.”

“I’ll be there. See you tomorrow, Y/N.”

“See ya.”

-

The next day was worse. People literally stopped me on the streets to take a picture with me, which was the weirdest thing. They all knew my name, so I guess someone spilled information to the tabloids.

School was about the same. People stared at me all day, but at least not in disgust this time. A few people tried asking me if they could meet my dad but I just ignored them. Finally the bell rang, indicating that school was over. Thank god.

“You coming to practice?” Anna asked me as we took our stuff out of the lockers.

“Nah.” I shut my locker door. “Got shit to do.”

“Coach is going to be mad.”

“No offense, but I don’t really give a flying fuck what coach thinks. I go to every single practice. I have never missed one, and I participate in every single game. Now, if you’d excuse me, I still have shit to do.”

Yeah, she is a little annoying sometimes, but I didn’t mean to be that rude to her. “I’m sorry. I just have a lot going on.”

“It’s fine. Go. I’ll tell her you got sick.” She smiles weakly at me.

I hug her before I go outside. I see a car sitting in front of the school with dark tinted windows. The window to the backseat rolls down, and my dad smiles at me.

“You ready?” He asks. The people outside gasp, but thankfully don’t freak out. I nod and get inside the car.

“Upper East Side, please.” He tells the driver.

“A driver, huh?” I raise my eyebrows at him once I get settled in the car.

“I’m not a pretentious douchebag, if that’s what you’re hinting at.” He laughs.

“Jesus, I feel like I’m in Gossip Girl. Serena, where at you?” I joke.

“What?” He asks.

“Nevermind.”

We get to his apartment building a while later. It’s nice-definitely the Upper East Side. The driver let both of us out, and we walked up to his apartment.

“This is where you live?” I gaped. It was huge, at least for New York standards. It was also really messy, but the nice furniture and the cute cat meeting us at the door made up for it.

“Yeah, sorry it looks like a tornado blew through here. I’ve been sleeping all day and didn’t clean.” He admits.

“I don’t mind. You saw where I lived.”

“Want some food? There’s leftover Chinese in the fridge from lunch.”

“Starving.”

I reheat the food, and then take a seat on his couch while I turn on the TV.

Maybe being his daughter isn’t so bad after all.