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#billy on the other hand vets tempted sometimes.
aziraphale-is-a-cat · 8 months
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DPXDC Community Service Mentor
After Dan's redemption arc and subsequent chilling out, the observants still feel he hasn't paid back for what he ruined, and decided that rather than incarcerate a perfectly nice guy, he's going to have mandatory community service.
And thus, Dan Phantom is shunted off into the mentor program for shitty powerhouses known as Marvel Duty.
So when Billy Batson is chosen and meets his new head mates, he's faced with morally questionable mythical figures such as Zeus, Hercules, Solomon, Atlas, Achilles, Mercury and,,, some guy named Dan???? Who, for the record, gives horrible life advice.
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Billy: Batman kinda scares me.
Dan: oh, he's one of the easier ones, actually. Just go after him first real quick when he has no reason to suspect you, worked real well.
Billy, very concerned: ...what?
Dan, doesn't realize how insane that was: what?
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Billy: How do I get rid of this rogue? He's really persistent!
Dan: kill him.
Billy: NO!
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Dan: That rich guy, the Wayne one.
Billy: yeah?
Dan: don't let him get your genetic material, crazy billionaires are an epidemic.
Billy: what the hell happened to you?
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Flash: so what were the crusades like, did you participate on either side?
Billy, put on the spot and panicking: uhhhh
Dan: say you were in China, Kublai Khan was trying to relive his grandfather's glory.
Billy awkward as hell: oh I was in China for that. Kublai and all that jazz.
Billy: were you alive in ancient China? You sound American?
Dan: I am, time travel.
Billy, confused: oh...
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