#bp fic

[youcantkillamutant]

I’m in NOLA and you know what that means...

I’m plotting another fucking BP fic. 

[tjadakaa]

I wrote a chapter for something sweeter. 3800 words. Not loving it but gonna keep chugging along.

It’ll be a great month if I can update anything else. Prayers up for bloody waters, Brevity In Death and all my other disregarded WIPs. Forgotten but not abandoned.

[hai-nae]

meant to post these sketches a few days ago? a week? but, well, life.

[jebewonmorelike]

I Didn't Think You Had It In You

(part one - "devil by the whiteboard") wc: 5k (i'm so sorry, longest one yet i've gotta chill but it's WORTH IT I PROMISE) pronouns: none used; n/a warnings: angst, fluff, swearing, some mean!hanbin and some infatuated!hanbin :) also this one's funnier than the last one warnings for alternate ending: suggestive/mature content - minors dni!! (link to it is *in* the fic for proprer conext/placement) summary: studentbodypresident!hanbin is majorly regretting the grief he's put introvertedrival!reader through for their entire academic career. i wonder how he'll try to make it up them... ~masterlist~ ♡ ~kofi (no pressure at all)~ *edited to say that... i edited this haha and it should be free of errors now* FINALLY DONE. PART TWO OF MY MASTERPIECE. lmaoooo. omg super secret surprise ending; my first attempt at such. hope you read both endings tho bc i really like them both :) love y'alllllll gonna go to bed now that i've marathon wrote this for 5 hours!

“WHAT!?” You shout, the shock of the words that just echoed through the hallway nearly knocking the air out of your lungs as you whip around to face the boy who uttered them.

You expect to see him smirking back at you, eyes taunting and mean. But what you find instead appears to be a look of surprise somewhat mirroring your own.

"You heard me that time, too," Hanbin responds quietly, averting your gaze.

You stare at the boy in front of you for a while, desperately trying to fill your lungs back up with the air you had lost. But the more oxygen you take in, the more anger you feel brewing in your blood. Abruptly, you start to walk back to where Hanbin stands in the middle of the hallway and the closer you get, the wider his eyes grow.

Only a few inches away from him now, Hanbin is staring back at you unblinkingly and you swear his cheeks are redder than they normally are. Without thinking, your hands reach up and connect with his chest--

Hanbin stumbles back as you push him, lips parting in surprise despite the lack of force behind your shove. Your hands remain on his chest as shock at your own actions suddenly renders you immobile.

Your face is mere centimeters from his for the second time tonight, both of you staring at each other; unsure what to do next. Hanbin coughs first, the tips of his ears now matching the scarlet of his cheeks. He places his hands on top of yours and removes them from his chest wordlessly.

You're positive that your cheeks are heating up now, too. You take a shaky breath before managing to clumsily demand, “What’s... What's wrong with you!? Why would I ever go out with you!?”

You watch as Hanbin's expression suddenly shifts, the condescending look returning to his eyes. “Maybe so you’d finally have someone to eat lunch with other than the collector’s edition of Jane Eyre.”

You frown, suddenly uneasy that Hanbin must have seen you alone in the library during lunch before. You wondered what other observations he was sitting on until it was the right time to shame you with them. Quietly, you lie, "I have people to eat lunch with."

"The Bronte Sisters don't count," he says with a smirk.

You swallow the lump in your throat that's starting to build. "I don't need anyone to eat lunch with."

"Hey, it's okay," he coos mockingly. "No need to cry. You cry enough during lunch as it is."

"You are such a bastard," you spit, watching as Hanbin's eyes seem to light up at the fire igniting in you once more. "Even if I wanted someone to eat lunch with, what gives you the audacity to suggest that that someone should be you!?"

He's just staring at you again, but his expression now seems to be one of awe rather than blank shock— though it's unrecognizable to you with white hot rage clouding your vision.

"You are a despicable human being, Hanbin. You're a liar; you're a phony. And now you've even become a cheat! You have never caused me to feel anything other than annoyance, anger and, tonight, disdain. But now..."

Hanbin's eyebrows raise slightly as he waits for you to continue.

"Now I can't help but pity you, too. Would it really have been so bad if my team won the Decathlon? Is your ego that fragile that you'd rather sabotage all of your integrity than to fail publicly? I feel so bad for you that you'd risk ruining your entire reputation in some misguided attempt to save it."

"I wasn't--," he says quietly, but you cut him off and he doesn't protest.

"I let you push me around, because I thought it was in everybody's best interest. But now that I've watched you stoop so low, I'm not making excuses anymore," you say, determinedly. "So, after I've said all this, I'll ask again: why would I ever want to go out with you, Sung Hanbin?"

It takes awhile for a response to appear on Hanbin's face and, once it does, you're a bit shaken at how unrecognizable it is. He seems to notice how you're looking at him and clears his throat before forcing himself to laugh in offense.

“I was just joking! No need to be so—… Why would I ever want to go out with you? Like I'm not way out of your league," he rambles haughtily, shaking his head in disbelief. "I just thought it might make joining my team seem like a better idea by comparison.”

"Well, it didn't," you declare, knowing there had to have been a motive behind Hanbin's words but still feeling a bit foolish for having almost considered believing them. "I'm not joining Blue Team next year. And now I don't think I'll be joining any team next year."

"What!?" Hanbin exclaims, eyebrows furrowing in confusion. "What do you mean you're not joining a team next year? You love Decathlon!"

You smile sadly. "I do. It's too bad you had to go and ruin it."

"I didn't know that you wouldn't--," he starts, fumbling his sentence and starting again as if he's panicking. "I didn't want you to quit! (Y/N), that's not--."

"I really hope you're happy now that you got what you wanted, Hanbin," you cut him off, making your way back to the exit doors and throwing them open. Over your shoulder, you call:

"You win!"

~

“If I had a penny for every time I caught you reading this book…” 

The sudden voice startles you, your collector’s edition of Jane Eyre falling from your hands and onto the table. The book shuts closed before you have a chance to mark the page you’re on.

“Oh,” Hanbin mumbles awkwardly. “Sorry.”

You open the book back up, quickly flipping to the page and placing your bookmark in it before setting it back down.

“I guess you would have every page memorized by now,” Hanbin says with a laugh. 

You frown at him suspiciously. “What do you want?”

“I don’t want anything except to have lunch with you,” he says smiling ear-to-ear, before glancing at your book. “And Miss Bronte, of course.”

You roll your eyes, picking up your sandwich for the first time since you sat down. “Well we both would rather gauge our eyes out than make small talk with you.”

“Oh, ouch,” Hanbin says as he bites his lip in a smirk. “Should I call your bluff?”

You pick up the spoon for your yogurt, immediately raising it to your eye before Hanbin reaches out in a panic and wraps his hand around yours. He lowers your hand that’s holding the spoon back down to the table with a nervous laugh.

“You’re a funny one, aren’t you?” Hanbin asks rhetorically, nodding as he pops off the lid to his soup and spoons it into his mouth. “This is nice! Why haven’t we done this before?”

Your face scrunches up in confusion. “Because I hate you.”

“No, we hate each other,” he corrects, eating another spoonful of soup. “Friendship is a two-way street.”

You choke a bit on your sandwich, coughing to clear your throat before exclaiming, “We are NOT friends!”

“But we could be,” Hanbin muses far-too happily. “Wouldn’t that be great?”

“No,” you answer plainly.

“It would be better than what we are now, right? Think about it: we would be a pretty unstoppable duo!”

“I wouldn't be your friend even if you paid me,” you spit. “And I know you’re really into paying people to get what you want lately.”

“Oh please, that was so three days ago,” Hanbin sighs exasperatedly. “Things were so much easier when you didn’t have a backbone. I pay to win one competition and you’re suddenly acting like you didn’t used to do everything I told you to?”

“I told you I’m not letting you push me around anymore,” you say definitively.

He smirks. “I just don’t really believe you…”

Your hand wraps around your spoon again, hurtling toward your right eyeball as Hanbin’s eyes widen in sudden fear. His hand reaches out to grab yours again, bringing it back down to the table in awkward silence.

“Please stop trying to impale yourself at the lunch table,” Hanbin requests quietly, attempting to steady his breathing. "I'll do anything you want, just do not make me have to carry your eyeball in my soup cup to the nurse's office."

You blink back at him. "Anything?"

"Oh, uh..." Hanbin says, clearly surprised that you clung onto his plea. "Did you want something... from me?"

You sigh, eating another spoonful of yogurt. "I have a proposal for Student Government."

"Oh sure, if you send it to me I can put my name on it and sign it," he says with a nod.

"No," you respond quickly.

"No? What do you--?"

"It's mine," you announce, placing your spoon down. "It's my proposal and it really means a lot to me and... I want everyone to know it's mine."

Hanbin looks at you curiously for a moment before a small smile graces his lips. He blinks at you as he whispers, "Cute."

"What?" You ask, one eyebrow raising in confused shock.

The boy in front of you's eyes widen for a moment before he shakes his head nonchalantly and looks down into his soup. "I meant, it's cute you think you'll be able to pitch it without puking..."

"I want you to pitch it," you respond, glaring back at him. "I know I can't make a speech to save my life. But people always like my words best when they come out of your mouth anyway."

Hanbin's eyes are doe-like as his lips form into a little surprised pout.

"So, could you pitch my proposal to the Student Council for me?" You ask, chewing your cheek. "All I want this time is the credit. It's really important to me so... I just..."

"Okay," he agrees, nodding gently. "I can do that."

You blink back at him. "Really?"

"Sure, I can help you," Hanbin says, before adding with a smirk:

"We're friends now, after all."

~

You take your seat at the far right of the Officers’ Table, adjusting your name plaque after neatly tucking your bag under your chair. It’s been two weeks since the last Student Government meeting and you are incredibly excited about the new proposal you’ve drawn up in support of increased mental health services on campus. You have to admit you’re glad that Hanbin had agreed to make the pitch speech for you.

“I’m excited to hear your proposal!” Stephanie, the Student Council Treasurer, says as she sits down next to you. “Are you nervous to pitch it? I know that public speaking is not your strong suit.”

Your eyebrows furrow confusedly at her question. “What do you mean? I’m not pitching it. Hanbin is.”

“Oh, um…” She smiles at you awkwardly. “Proposals can only be pitched by the member that created them! Those are the rules. I thought you knew that.”

“But I write Hanbin’s—…” You cut yourself off before you expose the Student Body President to the Treasurer. Your proposal is something you are terribly proud of and you want everyone to know it’s yours! But to find out now, only minutes away from the beginning of the meeting, that you’d have to be the one to present it to the entirety of the Student Government… Your vision is already burring with anxiety. All you can muster in response to Stephanie is, “Oh, okay.”

Completely frozen in fear, you’re only pulled out of your dissociative state when Stephanie taps you on the shoulder. She nods at you, gesturing with her hands for you to stand up. You scan the room, surprised when you realize it’s filled with the members of Student Government and that you must’ve zoned out for the entire first half of the meeting.

“Wait—,” Hanbin interjects from where he sits on the other side of Stephanie. He frowns at you confusedly, continuing, “I thought I was reading (Y/N)’s proposal…”

Hyungjun, the Vice President, laughs on Hanbin’s left. “Pretending he doesn’t know the rules. This guy!”

Hanbin’s eyes widen as he glances at the other Officers, unsure of how to react.

“It’s (Y/N)’s proposal,” Stephanie thankfully elaborates. “So, obviously, (Y/N) has to pitch it. And breaking that rule is immediate grounds for a dismissal vote.”

“Oh,” Hanbin mumbles, slowly nodding as he must be considering— just as you had— how many times he should’ve had a dismissal vote called on him by now. “Obviously.”

“So, (Y/N), if you’ll please,” Hyungjun prompts, nodding his head for you to stand up and recite your proposal. You're positive that all the oxygen has left the classroom as you shakily rise to your feet.

Gathering your proposal paper in your hand, you stare at the words on the page-- suddenly rendered illiterate by the amount of fear coursing through your body. Your breathing is shallow and thin and you wonder how long it will take before you've fainted from the anxiety.

"Um, the--... the, um, proposal I am sharing today," you begin; the nervous stammering you always developed when forced to address a crowd rearing it's ugly and reliable head. "Is about--... Or, well, it's to address... It's to help fix the campus's lack of rental mealth hesources."

"Oh god," you hear Hanbin whisper under his breath as you completely flub your words. All of the Student Council members are now chuckling at your mistake as you shake your head quickly, trying to refocus yourself so you can continue.

"There's--... Um, there's plenty of evidence that," you say, eyes locked on your paper as you attempt to make sense of the proposal you'd written which now appears as nothing more to you than a page full of gibberish. "That... That this school... That it's--..."

"Is this a joke?" A Student Council member shouts from the back of the classroom, as you resign yourself to a mere dear in headlights. "Aren't you embarrassed? You're the Student Government Secretary and you can't even form a coherent sentence?"

"HEY!" An angry voice booms to your left as you try to force down the bile that's currently stinging your esophagus. The sudden shout jolts you back to awareness as you look to see who it came from.

"Do you want to leave?" Hanbin threatens, jaw set in an uncharacteristic public display of fury. "Would you care to explain how bullying a Student Government Officer is at all in line with your duty as a Council Member?"

The student's eyes widen as he stares back at the Student Body President in shock. "I--... I--..."

"Look who can't form a coherent sentence now," Hanbin says with a smirk. A few moments pass before Hyungjun clears his throat, causing Hanbin to remember where he is. He looks around at the room apprehensively before standing and bowing sheepishly to the rest of the Student Council.

"I'm so sorry for the disrespectful outburst," he apologizes, voice returning to its usual "perfect" tone and the dimples beneath his eyes cratering as he smiles embarrassedly. "But as Student Body President, I simply can't condone bullying. Especially of one of our Officers, who is..."

Hanbin finally looks at you, his eyes suspiciously genuine. He averts your gaze awkwardly after just a moment, turning back to address the rest of the Student Council members. "Who is the best Student Government Secretary I could've ever asked for. And whom unfortunately, has a terrible fear of public speaking."

You watch as the crowd of students begin to look down at their hands and their laps guiltily.

"(Y/N) has had incredible ideas for this school," Hanbin starts, his eyebrows raising when he remembers he can't actually mention all of the ideas you've had for this school-- as he had always been the one to pitch them and, in turn, pass them off for his own. He recovers, "That have never been heard by us before due to (Y/N)'s fear of public speaking! And it's a shame that on (Y/N)'s first attempt to show them to us, you responded with bullying and ridicule."

The students in the classroom are now all doe-eyed as they take in Hanbin's words and, as you realize what's going on, you have to suppress a laugh.

"Incredible," you whisper, shaking your head in disbelief at the boy that is Sung Hanbin.

"I think we should all treat each other with the utmost respect and kindness-- especially as members of the Student Government. And this, coincidentally, plays into (Y/N)'s proposal about mental health resources at our school," Hanbin continues, doing what he does best. "I think we should move to vote on this proposal immediately."

"You're right, Sunbaenim!" The same student that had hurled insults at you earlier agrees enthusiastically as he stands up from his seat, eyes practically turning to hearts as they gaze upon Hanbin. "We need to provide more anti-bullying and mental health resources for our students. I'm so glad you came up with this brilliant proposal!"

"Oh, I didn't! I--," Hanbin starts to correct, but you already know how this ends as you sit back down in your seat with a heavy sigh.

"What would we do without our shining Student Body President?" Another student calls, starting a round of applause for Hanbin.

You observe him quietly, watching as any signs of protest slowly leave his face. He smiles resignedly back at his peers, clasping his hands together to nod graciously at them as the other Officers join in on the applause as well.

Even when Sung Hanbin tried to help you, it all ended up falling perfectly back into his lap anyway.

~

"What page are we on now?"

You groan, slamming your book down on the table. "Is this going to be a pattern? Do I have to eat lunch in the bathroom from now on?"

"Not my ideal place to eat lunch, but," he pauses, placing his hands down flat on the table with a smile. "I'll brave it for you."

You pick up your collector's edition of Jane Eyre and drop it on his right hand.

He presses his lips together firmly, looking up to the corner of the room as he tries to ignore the pain. "Okay, I know yesterday didn't go like we'd hoped, but--."

"Like I hoped," you correct, shaking your head in disgust. "I asked you to read my proposal for me. And everyone just ended up pretending like it was yours anyway. And you went along with it!"

"Well--."

"Where is the 'we' in any of that?" You cut him off quickly, watching as his brow furrows. "There is no we. You stole my proposal; just like you stole the Decathlon."

Hanbin stares at you silently for a moment, before responding softly, "I'm sorry."

"Sure you are."

"I am!" He pleads and you hate to admit that he appears earnest. "Really, I didn't mean for that to happen. I stuck up for you when that asshole made fun of you! It's not like I didn't do anything at all."

You stare back at Hanbin wordlessly. He had stood up in front of the entire Student Council to scold that stupid kid in your defense. You'd never seen him get angry in front of people like that before. He'd always cared too much about his perfect, clean image.

"I want to make it up to you," he says with a nod. "So I have a proposal for you."

"Is it the one you stole from me?" You deadpan.

He sighs exasperatedly. "Shut up and let me tell you I have a spot for you on the Blue Team for the rest of this semester!"

You blink back at him in surprise. "What?"

"You deserve to win Scholastic Decathlon at least once, (Y/N)," Hanbin says with a smile. "And if you're really not gonna compete again next year then let me make it happen this season."

"Hanbin..." You falter, brow furrowing suspiciously. "Y-... your team is full."

"I told you there's always a spot for you," he rebuts quickly. "Ilsung's been pretty annoying recently anyway. Didn't you hear what he said about you at Regionals?"

Sighing annoyedly, you take a sip of your iced tea. "Hanbin, I can't join your team."

"Why not?" He whines, folding his hands on the table and resting his chin on them. "You'd be doing me a really big favor!"

"Aren't you the one whose supposed to be doing me a favor?"

Hanbin blinks up at you, pouting in a sickening display of cuteness. "Pleeeeaaase..."

"If you don't stop that right now, I will shove this entire bottle of tea UP your--."

"I'd like to see you try."

~

It's been a week since Hanbin had asked you to join the Blue Team for the remainder of the season. Since then, "Hanbin's" Student Government proposal regarding mental health resources on campus has passed three student votes and, today, a school-wide assembly is taking place to celebrate the proposal and the Student Body President's exceptional efforts.

Your moral obligation to your Secretary duties coming before your feelings, you had written Hanbin's speech for this afternoon just like you always did.

It has also been a week and a day since Hanbin started eating lunch with you in the library. No matter how hard you tried to bully him into leaving you alone to your collector's edition of Jane Eyre (or how hard you smacked him with various items from your lunchbox), your efforts were in vain.

Hanbin had no intentions of ceasing your "lunch dates", as he called them (always prompting you to hit him once more). He'd flinched at first when Hyungjun and Stephanie walked up to the both of you last Friday, face flushing when they asked him what he was doing eating lunch with you.

But just as soon as that fear of being perceived as imperfect appeared, it subsequently faded away.

"A President and his Secretary notoriously make a pretty good duo, don't you think?" He'd said with an innocent smile.

Hyungjun and Stephanie looked at each other confusedly, of course interpreting Hanbin's words to imply something different than he'd meant.

"Oh! Oh no," Hanbin had clarified quickly, raising his hands in defense. "I meant, as... I meant as friends!"

Hyungjun and Stephanie had nodded quickly before excusing themselves and running out of the library.

"This is why I have to curate all of your words for you," you had said, rolling your eyes at him.

But no matter how much you outwardly displayed your dislike of Hanbin's presence during your lunch period... you'd be lying if you said you hadn't started to get used to him bothering you with his company.

Perhaps you'd even started to like it.

So now, as Hanbin stands behind the tall, wooden podium in the center of the gymnasium delivering the speech you wrote for him, you stand at the back of the gym and observe him carefully. He really is a great public speaker-- every word you've written for him coming to life on his tongue.

But there's a sentence he utters that suddenly catches your attention as you realize he's no longer referencing the paper in front of him.

“The truth is… I didn’t write this proposal,” Hanbin confesses, a wave of confused and shocked whispers sounding across the room. Your stomach churns as you hang onto his every word.

He swallows nervously, before continuing, “And, furthermore, I also haven’t written any of the proposals or speeches that I’ve given during my time as Student Body President. Secretary (Y/N) has written all of them.”

Horrified, you look around the room as everyone’s eyes come to rest on you. Desperately resisting the urge to curl up into a ball and die, your focus remains locked on Hanbin. 

“I'm so sorry to disappoint all of my peers and teachers, but I needed to tell the truth as it's the right thing to finally do,” he continues, nodding affirmatively. “And I also have something to say about the Scholastic Decathlon. The only reason the Blue Team won Regionals this year is because—.”

“Because you’re such an incredible team!” You shout, standing up suddenly and instantly regretting it. Hanbin’s eyes meet yours immediately, his eyebrows raised in shock at your sudden outburst. But there’s no going back now. 

Walking up to the stage quickly as you do your best to dissociate, you push Hanbin aside when you reach the podium. “Hi, everyone. I’m so sorry for the confusion, but Hanbin is actually quite under-the-weather. He’s so dedicated to his role as Student Body President that he still wanted to deliver his speech today even with a fever. We pumped him full of ibuprofen, but…”

You turn to Hanbin, who is staring at you as if you have two heads. You touch the back of your hand to his forehead and put on the performance of your lifetime as you dote over him. “Oh my gosh, he’s burning up! You poor thing.”

“What are you doing? I was gonna—,” Hanbin protests, but you cut him off by stepping on his foot behind the podium. He seethes at the pain, glaring at you as you continue to save his ass.

“Unfortunately Hanbin is very sick, so he’s not really making much sense. I’m sure he will apologize for the confusion when he’s feeling better,” you conclude, grabbing Hanbin by the arm. “I’ll bring him to the nurse’s office now.”

As you drag a flabbergasted Hanbin through the crowd and out the gymnasium doors, you march down the hallway and into an empty classroom. Pulling him inside, you lock the door behind him quickly and shove him up against it a bit more aggressively than you’d intended.

“Are you CRAZY!?” You shout, hands balled up in his dress shirt as he gawks back at you wordlessly.

“Are YOU!?” He shouts back, eyes nearly popping out of their sockets. “(Y/N), what are you doing? I was trying to tell everybody the truth!”

“WELL, STOP IT!!”

Hanbin’s cheeks flush pink as he looks at your hands fisted up in his white-button down. He’s entirely flustered by your uncharacteristic display of force. “W—… What?”

Dropping your hands to your sides, you repeat, “Stop it before you ruin your fucking life, you absolute moron!”

“I—… Isn’t that what you want?" He asks confusedly. "I was terrible to you. Don’t you want me to pay for what I did?”

“What I wanted was to finally win Decathlon fair and square. And to have my name on my own stupid proposals and speeches for once.”

“But… I’m the one who made sure none of that happened. You even said you were gonna quit Decathlon next year because of me," Hanbin protests. "Come on, you have to want me to face some sort of serious consequence!”

“Hanbin! What’s… Why are you doing this!?" You exclaim, stepping back from the boy. "Do you want me to join the Blue Team that bad? You won't even be allowed back on it if you tell everybody the truth.”

He shakes his head quickly. “No, of course not!”

“Then what’s the deal, huh? I know it’s something. Do you seriously expect me to believe that you really just feel sorry for everything that's ever happened between us all of a sudden?”

“It’s not… It’s not all of a sudden. I—…” Now Hanbin is giving you a run for your money as the worst stammering mess. “I’ve been sorry ever since you said that you…”

Growing impatient, you demand, “Since I said that I what!?”

“That you were disappointed in me!” He shouts under pressure— his lips parting slightly as he sharply inhales at his own words.

You blink back at him, eyes just as wide as his. “I said that?”

He nods slowly. “You—… you leaned towards me and with all of this fire in your eyes, you told me that you were disappointed in me. I didn’t think you had it in you.”

"I don't remember," you say as you swallow nervously-- the tone of Hanbin's voice almost daring you to think he might’ve meant something more. “To be honest, I was so mad that I… I sort of blacked out.”

He smiles now, genuinely and the cute under-eye dimples that are reserved for public events are now on display only for you. You’d be lying if you said they didn’t make you feel some type of way in this unexpectedly intimate moment. “I’m not surprised. You also called me a ‘cheating asshole’ and a ‘self-righteous prick’.”

You press your lips together, slightly embarrassed before mumbling, “You deserved it.”

“I did!” He agrees a little too enthusiastically. “I deserve worse, actually.”

“Hanbin…”

(super secret spicy alternate ending 🌶️ HERE 🌶️-- minors do not view/interact; just continue reading below!! also pls read bothhhhh if you are of age hahaha if you want no pressure but pressure)

“Come on, (Y/N)— I’m everything you said I am and more,” he says, biting his lip. “So why shouldn’t everybody know what you know?”

“Because I already forgave you, you dumbass!”

Hanbin’s mouth is already open to protest, but when he actually hears your words it shuts tightly. His head tilts to the side innocently in a questioning gaze. "You did?"

You sigh. "Yes. I mean, you've done a lot to try to make everything up to me. And I let you keep eating lunch with me, didn't I?"

The boy in front of you's lips part in surprise before he finally grins. "I knew you liked eating lunch with me more than Jane Eyre!"

You roll your eyes, trying and failing to hold back a grin of your own. "Any more unkind words towards Jane and we're kicking you out of the lunch club."

He laughs and you notice for the first time how beautifully joy manifests on his face. But his expression quickly becomes more serious once again. "I really am sorry, (Y/N). For everything. I've been awful to you for way too long and... I can't tell you how much I regret it. It turns out I actually really like you!"

Your jaw drops at his sudden confession and... so does his.

"As a person!" He exclaims, holding both hands up in defense as he laughs awkwardly. "I meant, as a person. You know phrasing's not my strong suit."

Cheeks heating up, you nod understandingly though you hate to admit his words had your heart racing.

Hanbin's lips press together in a dimpled smile. "So... does this mean you'll join the Blue Team for the rest of the year?"

You pucker your lips for a moment as you think, before answering definitively, "No. I could never betray my Pink Team like that."

He bites his lip, nodding sadly in agreement at your sentiment. Reaching for the door handle and unlocking it, your eyes reconnect with Hanbin's. In the end, he'd gone through all this effort just to make things right-- more than you'd ever expected him to do for you.

And the tiny frown on his face isn't helping to convince you to leave him empty-handed.

"But if I remember correctly," you add, your hand falling from the door knob to your side as you muster up all of the courage hiding deep within you. "You also pitched me an alternative."

Hanbin's eyes narrow in confusion before they suddenly light up, lips parted in shock.

"So maybe we can graduate from 'lunch dates' to a real date some time," you say, and it's not a question. Hanbin just stands there, grinning like an absolute idiot. "How does that sound?"

"Good," he says, nodding rapidly. "It sounds good."

"Good," you affirm, opening the door of the classroom. "Now let's get out of here..."

Hanbin follows you into the hallway, still smiling like he just won the lottery.

"Stop looking so happy," you say, smacking his shoulder playfully. "You're about to have to go to the nurse's office and fake the worst flu of your fucking life."

[yoonjikooka]

#20. I still have memories of you (Jennie)

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[jinlias]

tally - rosé

— songwriter!, musician! rosé, paparazzi

i say fuck it when i feel it, cuz no one’s keeping tally i do what i want with who i like

rosé was exhausted, she hates this cycle. of sneaking around and hiding under dark clothes when you’re in public, of hiding her lockscreen and the polaroid on her phone case from appearing on photos or videos, she hated being unable to talk about you to everyone, she hated all of this, loathed it.

but she always kept you around, even if you had to ride with crew most of the time, for when she was away from you too long she would start to hear her own heartbeat more than she’d like. you were peace to her. rosé was exhausted, but mostly, she was furious.

and i ain’t gon conceal it, while you talking all that shit, i’ll be getting mine

it was a thing of time, that everyone started noticing the same feminine silhouette around her even when none of her crew was. fans kept up with her management team, everyone even knew her re-ocurring friend group, they just couldn’t pinpoint where u fell, yet, you were always there.

don’t apologize for my behavior, if you’re offended i don’t care.

she never fit in the usual korean mold, the delicate, educated and always quiet women she shared the industry with because they valued their dream career more than their own freedom. controversy is what made her stand out, it’s how she blew up, it’s expected no one was too surprised when she started a soft launch of your relationship. pictures of the two bowls of food, tangled hands, two shadows on a crosswalk, small, private, intimate photos like these easily gave away it was not just one of her friends.

sometimes i like to go play dirty, just like all of the fuckboys do, that’s my choice and there’s no one i’m hurting, when that’s not girly.

but rosé has always been open about her private life, she’s never hid behind dark clothes or hats, at least not until you. she was a weekly topic on social media, everyone took out the time to discuss her possible hook ups, like that was of important matter to anyone else.

that’s why everyone else was so observant now, because all of the sudden she stopped running out of models’ apartments at three am with tousled hair. instead, she was seen hiding behind her clothes and around a becoming familiar silhouette at restaurants, movie theaters, parks, at houses and parties of families who no one’s ever seen before, which was the ideal, but people would just not stop watching her. and you.

everybody tells me to play nice, everybody judge but looking twice, but my body don’t belong to none of them though, and i’m not going to change cuz you say so.

she was tired of playing nice, of laughing it off when men asked her about her love life, when the woman interviewer asked about any special boys in her life. she was tired of everyone assuming and deciding which one of her friends she was dating today. why couldn’t they see she loved you? why couldn’t they just move on? she wasn’t theirs to play around with, she just wanted to do what she loved, surrounded by people she loved. surrounded by you.

warned me to make the rules, or play the fool, it ain't that hard to choose

“rosie, this could make or break your career” you really wish it wasn’t this hard, you wish you could just love each other and live contently. without anyone else interfering.

“i don’t give a fuck anymore. i need you to do the same” she’s cried, she’s given up. but she’s angry, she wants this over. she wants you two to be free. “will you walk the red carpet with me? please” she asks again, begs, her eyes are telling you all of the above. how she can’t take this anymore, if she has to pretend she doesn’t know you for one more night, she might just explode.

rosé can’t ever explain to you the amount of bliss she felt when you agreed, she had been given an ultimatum since the beginning, play the fool or break the rules. play the fool because it could save her career, break the rules because it could save her. she’s finally brave enough to choose for you. and she chooses to be immensely happy, publicly

i say fuck it when i feel it. cuz no one’s keeping tally i do what i want with who i like.

that night, hell broke loose. so did the internet, the photo of her kissing you at the red carpet had millions of fans publicly giving up on her, but so many more expressing their gratitude and pride for her. regardless she couldn’t care less about the numbers, the money, all she cared about was you, her, your future together, and how it was finally possible.

[bp-zb1fics]

doll~

pairing: leejeong x reader

pronouns: none used

genre: heavily suggestive themes, smut

wc: 736

summary: jeonghyeon really needs more self control (lmao no he doesn't)

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT PLEASE!!!!!

tw/tags: plot where? flirting, implied nudity, kisses, making out, lap sitting, hair pulling, name calling (doll), fingering, riding, choking, pre-negotiated safeword/signal, leejeongs a lil wild but v soft for u

a/n for 🐺 anon ty for sharing the dream that inspired this short, spicy and spontaneous fic and for @yunacoeur bc our little leejeong obsessed squad won’t be complete without your hype energy ily both 💜 enjoy this fic and the lil mood board I made to destroy our sanity. I hope you dream of him tonight!

You’re in bed when he gets home.

It’s late. He’s missed you. You’re all sleepy and soft and fuzzy around the edges, whining as the light from the hallway filters in when he opens the door. 

“Leejeong-yah!” God, he hates it when you call him that. (He really doesn’t)

“I’m home.” He announces. 

“Yeah, no shit.” You groan, sitting up, running a hand through your mussed up hair.

His response promptly goes flying out the window along with the rest of his sanity. 

You’re wearing his shirt. And what looks like absolutely nothing else. Jeonghyeon takes a deep breath. He needs to control himself. Really, if he lost his shit everytime you did something like this, he’d literally have a heart attack.

Still his eyes wander down to the sliver of skin between the hem of his shirt and the sheets. You shift a little as he stays quiet. Oh, you’re definitely not wearing anything else.

“Jeonghyeonie?”

“Hmmm?..” No, he’s definitely not moving closer, his legs just have a mind of their own, is all.

“Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Like what?” He says absentmindedly. Oh look, he’s on the bed now.

“Like…this…” You’re suddenly faint, he’s right in front of you, his legs bracketing your bare ones, his arms more or less pinning you against the bed frame.

Okay, maybe Jeonghyeon’s a little crazy right now but who can blame him when you look like that? Cheeks flushed, gaze bashfully trying to avoid his. Well that won’t do. 

The edges of his mouth quirk upwards, just a little, before his hand is tilting your chin up and his lips meet yours. It lingers, sweet and needy and just leejeong. He pulls away briefly just to say”

“I missed you.” And then he’s kissing you again, hotter and hungrier. You can’t help as your fingers fly to his hair, tugging at the strands.

Jeonghyeon snaps, a hand snaking around your waist and flipping you over so he’s leaning against the bed frame, you on his lap. His shirt is all rucked up, exposing your bare thighs and well, everything. He runs his fingers over your skin reverently, leaving goosebumps in his wake, all the heat pooling between your legs where he’s pressed, firm and straining.

“Pretty doll.” He murmurs and you whimper, just a little. Jeonghyeon doesn’t even bother to undress, slicking up his fingers and opening you up for him, other hand cupping the back of your neck to hold you close.

“You’re so good for me.” He praises as you get shaky, hands gripping to the back of his shirt as his fingers send jolts of heat up your spine.

Your boyfriend can’t help but call your name as he slides in, saying it like a prayer, holding onto your hips for dear life as he breathes heavily, jaw clenching. Then, he wraps one hand loosely around your throat and pauses. Jeonghyeon looks at you, a tentative question.

“Okay?” You nod. “You know that I’ll stop if you tell me to stop?” Another clear nod. “And if you can’t talk?” You give him the signal you agreed on. “Okay I’ll-”

Fingers tighten around your neck and you gasp as he coaxes your hips up only for gravity to bring them back down. Both of your breaths stutter, your more than his. He’s slow at first, glancing up every few seconds to check on you. But soon, his pace becomes frantic and you can only cry out faintly, warm fingers cutting off your airflow.

“You feel…” He whispers into your ear, almost as overwhelmed by the sensation as you were. “You’re doing well, doll.” You swear you nearly white out from that alone.

Later, concerned hands carefully run over the red marks around your neck. You’re blissed out and boneless, lying on top of him, his chest still heaving.

“Good?” He asks like it’s your first time, so tentative that you can only smile.

“Very good.” You breathe out. You’re warm and cleaned up, having changed out of his soiled shirt into another one, still his of course. He’s in his pajamas too, hair still a little damp from the bath you both took.

“Goodnight Leejeongie~” You murmur as you doze off. Jeonghyeon closes his eyes.

If he lost his shit everytime you did something, he’d definitely have a heart attack by now. But sometimes, you know? That didn’t seem too bad.

[robobarbie]

robo 😘😘😘 can we please get juicy masculine tiddies OF DILF NIGHTOWL 🤭🤭🤭🤭 PLEASE (teehee)

i wish i had the time... however, in the meantime, i saw a dilf nightowl fic tonight courtesy of [REDACTED] about hooking up in a hotel room a couple years after your divorce from each other. I feel like this could quench the thirst

[twinkminnie]

♡ my works ♡

finished one shots

⋅˚₊ if you're ready, come and get it - 6.3K

rated: explicit pairing: jeon jungkook/park jimin summary: the one where omega porn star jimin gets wrecked by the newcomer, alpha jungkook. tags: service top jk, overstimulation, exhibitionism

⋅˚₊ everytime i see you, i don't wanna behave - 5.8K

rated: explicit pairing: jeon jungkook/park jimin summary: jeongguk can't stop thinking about it. tags: established relationship, canon compliant, bottom!jm, top!jk

⋅˚₊ we could belong together - 10.2K

rated: explicit pairing: jeon jungkook/park jimin, park jimin/park jimin summary: twenty-one year old jimin wakes up to find that not only has he traveled six years into the future but he is in a committed relationship — with jeongguk. tags: threesome, self-cest, two jimins, bottom!jm, top!jk, canon divergence

⋅˚₊ worst nightmare, sweetest dream - 3.3K

rated: explicit pairing: jeon jungkook/park jimin summary: when jungkook, a hunter, wanders too far in the forest, fairy jimin decides he has to have to him. tags and warnings: dead dove do not eat, non-con elements, dub-con, sex pollen, magical realism, bottom!jm, top!jk

⋅˚₊ punish me, daddy! - 13.2K

rated: explicit pairing: kim namjoon/park jimin summary: his daddy has wielded rigid, consistent discipline and unrealistic expectations his entire life. jimin was to be the best, the smartest, the prettiest, the most obedient child. and jimin, more than anything, wants to be good, wants to please him, wants to become the son his daddy has tried so valiantly to shape him into. but jimin is a bad boy. tags and warnings: dead dove do not eat, non-con elements, dub-con, incest, grooming, emotional manipulation, boypussy!jm with breasts, top!nj

⋅˚₊ secrets, secrets 6.3K

rated: explicit pairing: jeon jungkook/park jimin summary: “i know your secret.” jimin peers from where he’s washing his hands, lured to where the school’s resident asshole, jeon jeongguk, is stepping into the bathroom. he’s not sure if he should feel lucky or frightened that it’s only the two of them alone. or; the one where school bully jeongguk takes advantage of school nerd, jimin. warnings: dead dove do not eat, homophobia, homophobic slurs, non-con, blackmail, painful sex, unhappy ending, humiliation, degradation, top!jk, bottom!jm

⋅˚₊ vicissitude 10.5K

rated: explicit pairing: jeon jungkook/park jimin summary: popular, pretty girl bully cisfem!jm takes advantage of closeted transfem!jgk. warnings: dead dove do not eat, transphobia, blackmail, non-con, humiliation, bullying, emotional/mental manipulation & abuse, hurt no comfort, unhappy ending, heavy angst, misgendering, threats, penis in vagina sex, +more on ao3

finished chaptered works

⋅˚₊ i can be your china doll (if you'd like to see me fall) - 2 chapters, 30.5K

rated: explicit pairing: jeon jungkook/park jimin summary: it’s becoming hard to not want to be around jeongguk all the time. jimin wants to soak up all the knowledge jeongguk can offer him, to learn from the best, to be close to him. he hopes he'll have many more chances to show jeongguk that he is willing to do whatever he can to make him proud. warnings: dead dove do not eat, non-con, dub-con, emotional manipulation, coercion, power imbalance, professor!jk, student!jm

ongoing chaptered works

⋅˚₊ if you're too shy (let me know) - 39K, 2/5 chapters completed

rated: explicit pairing: jeon jungkook/park jimin, kim taehyung/park jimin summary: in order to impress his crush, jimin has to turn to his favorite hyung and well-known bachelor, jeongguk. jimin needs jeongguk to teach him how to have sex. as expected, things get more complicated. tags: boypussy!jm with breasts, endgame jm/jk, friends to lovers

ongoing series

♡ milf jimin series ♡

part one

⋅˚₊ put him on his knees, give him something to believe in 6.8K

rated: explicit pairing: jeon jungkook/park jimin summary: the one where jungkook finally gets to eat his best friend's milf of a mother's pussy. warnings: cunnilingus, aged up jm, de-aged jk, 90s au, mommy kink, munch!jk, face-sitting, bp w/ tits!jm

♡ finished twitter threads on ao3 ♡

⋅˚₊ masterlist ⋅˚₊

[notacelestialbeing]

criminal (tiffany x f!reader)

a tiffany au, chapter story.

⤷ synopsis: tiffany is the leader of a criminal society known as the syndicated. she meets you through her father who wants her to marry you as a way to grow army of the syndicated. it all starts to spiral out of control until tiffany and you begin to develop feelings for each other. tiffany being unable to love/be loved, doesn’t know what this new emotion is, you help her figure it out. however, an unknown society begins to invade any possibility of happiness entering the two societies and tries to take revenge from the past. a past two guys tried to put behind. but can you two truly defeat whatever unknown society has started to take over the world?

⤷ characters:

switch!f!reader - co-leader of the jaded morningstars

switch!tiffany - leader of the syndicated seraphs

jung ho-seok - father of tiffany

kim namjoon - father of the reader

IU - mother of tiffany

han sohee - mother of the reader

kim chaewon - sister of the reader

rosé - right hand woman of the reader/older sister

bang chan - left hand man of the reader

huh yunjin - right hand woman of tiffany

min yoongi - left hand man of tiffany/older brother

newjeans - the reader’s younger sisters

dreamcatcher - the reader’s cousins (special appearances)

aespa - tiffany’s younger sisters

itzy - tiffany’s cousins (special appearances)

the serpents/vampires

the dearils/shapeshifters

lilith’s messengers/demons

hades’ pigeons/phoenixes

+ more guest appearances/special appearances.

⤷ warnings: violence, sexual themes, suggestive language, cursing, mature themes, gore, mentions of traumatic experiences, fluffy, slightly angsty, supernatural characters/places, themes of paranormal activity, greek mythology, dark.

⤷ themes/tropes of the story: enemies to lovers, arranged marriage, cults, dystopian societies, cyberpunk, paranormal, supernatural themes, mentions of greek gods/goddesses, mentions of demons/vampires/evil seraphs/phoenixes/shapeshifters.

⤷ songs:

s-class by stray kids, venom by stray kids, freeze by stray kids, charmer by stray kids, etc.

cyberpunk by ateez

end of the night by jay park

love killa by monsta x, got me in chains by monsta x, rotate by monsta x, etc.

dive by jooyoung

bother me by chungha

mirotic by tvxq, everyday it rains by tvxq, wrong number by tvxq, etc.

trauma by sf9

love on the floor by nct 127

criminal by taemin, move by taemin, artistic groove by taemin, heart stop by taemin & seulgi, eclipse by taemin + a lot of songs by taemin.

bite me by enhypen

eve, psyche & the bluebeard’s wife by lesserafim

sinphony by kim wooseok, shame by kim wooseok, red moon by kim wooseok, etc.

miss right by bts, dimple by bts, coffee by bts, rain by bts, 21st century girl by bts, etc.

h2o by lay

⤷ a chapter series.

⤷ chapter 1: the unknown society.

[hwangalleryy]

➨ JENNIE'S BODY

capa inspirada no filme Jennifer's body x jennie e rosé.

status: disponível.

[http-mianhae]

13 ➛ never have you ever got spat in the face

previous | masterlist | next

please comment or lmk in any way for the taglist!

TAGLIST ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ @tocupid @cyberpunksunwoo @aerivrs @minhui896

[jebewonmorelike]

Good Luck, Mickey!

wc: 1k warnings: a pretty flirtatious little joke made by ricky... do you need to be warned of that? maybe if you have a weak heart. otherwise very very light angst and fluff. pronouns: none used; n/a summary: planetmaster/idol!reader and their boyfriend ricky have to pretend they don't know each other while the cameras are on ~masterlist~ ♡ ~kofi (no pressure at all)~ this was a request! it's short and sweet but fun. i might want to expand more on this one eventually. spending tonight rewatching bp after work :,)

Positioning yourself in the wing of the stage strategically, you lean forward just a bit so you can take a look from behind the curtain at the crowd of unsuspecting trainees lined up after completing their second mission.

You spot a head of perfectly styled blonde hair sticking out from the group almost immediately due to the height of its owner. Smiling to yourself, you hop up and down a bit to pump yourself up. You can't wait to see the look on your boyfriend's face when you step out onto the stage.

The lights dim quickly, then flash dramatically back on as a producer gives you the go ahead. You nod respectfully and steady yourself as you begin to make your way out from behind the curtain and to the center of the stage. The boys gathered in front of you in neat formations begin to scramble excitedly; shouting and jumping with enthusiasm as you step towards the front of the stage.

Your eyes find Ricky, who is standing completely still as he stares up at you in shock-- not knowing how to react properly to your presence. Some of his teammates are poking him and laughing, teasing him about your unexpected appearance as a Planet Master.

You had met Ricky a while ago when he joined your company as a trainee. You would run into each other in the hallways at night, as you were always in a practice room trying to improve even after your debut. He could be uncharacteristically shy around you, since you were his senior (and he was secretly such a big fan). Needless to say, Ricky was incredibly surprised when you were the one who eventually asked him out.

"Hello Boys Planet trainees! I'm leader and main vocalist (Y/N) from Virtual Reality," you announce confidently. "I know you've only just finished your Second Mission, but time is limited when you're forming the next big K-Pop boy group!"

Most of the trainees begin another uproar, some complaining that they're exhausted and some shouting for you to hurry up and announce the next mission already. You sympathize with both sets of emotions.

You glance at Ricky, who is now smirking at you from the crowd-- eyebrows raised as he chews his cheek. Fighting the urge to grin back at him winningly, your eyes return to your script card in your hand.

"The Third Mission is..." You look back at the screen behind you and gesture towards it as a new pair of words appear. “Artist Battle!"

Yet another commotion ensues and you suddenly understand why the boys kept losing their voices in the first two missions. As you finish your script, announcing that teams will be formed and then re-formed after eliminations, you're instructed to meet and greet the trainees and give them your well wishes.

After a half hour of greeting all of the contestants and having to pretend like you'd never met any of them before in your life, an especially familiar contestant strolls up to you.

"Hello, how are you?" Ricky greets formally as a few of the trainees he is closest with giggle behind him. "It's so nice to finally meet you."

"Hi, how are you?" You return, extending your hand for him to shake as you bite your lip to keep yourself from laughing in front of the staff. "What did you say your name was?"

"Ricky," he replies, taking your hand in his and shaking it firmly. "And your name is?"

You squeeze his hand hard, raising your eyebrows in a stern warning. Too far, you mouth.

"Ow!" He whines before looking around to smile nervously at the closely observing staff. "I mean, WOW that joke did not land! Of course I know who you are. I love you."

You pinch his hand harder.

"--R WORK! I love your work," Ricky corrects after your warning, but the mischievous glint is still in his eyes. "I'm a big fan of your entire body of work."

Zhang Hao and Kuan Jui have to excuse themselves as they burst into laughter, running out into the hall to (most likely) tell everyone what Ricky just said with cameras rolling.

Ricky smiles at you smugly and you finally drop his hand. A producer frowns at you both confusedly. "Do you two... know each other or something?"

Ricky shakes his head. "Where would I have met the leader and main vocalist of Virtual Reality before?"

The producer nods, shrugging in agreement. "Huh. You just have good chemistry is all."

"He's not my type," you reply coolly, eyes narrowing as you glare at your boyfriend.

"Hey," Ricky pouts softly; a little frown forming on his lips.

You fight the urge to lift up on your toes and give your tall, handsome boyfriend a peck, opting instead to pat him on the shoulder and give him a boastful grin. "It was nice to meet you, Nicky!"

His eyebrows furrow now, the adorable pout growing deeper (and more powerful). "It's Ricky."

"Good luck, Mickey!" You call over your shoulder with a wave, following two staff members out the door.

~

Walking through the empty hall to the back parking lot after you've finished removing your wardrobe and makeup in your dressing room, you see your favorite trainee (okay-- your second favorite trainee. Red House Mingyu is actually your favorite but you can NOT tell Ricky that) waiting for you in the doorway.

"Hey Nicky," you greet with a laugh as Ricky looks up from his phone.

"Stoooooop," he whines, basically collapsing in your arms as you hug him. Into your shoulder, he mumbles, "I am your type."

You kiss his cheek, rubbing his back comfortingly. "You totally are my type.”

"I can't believe you're hosting the show I'm on," he says, pulling back from the hug to look at you. "You told me you were getting the cats bathed today."

You throw your head back in a laugh. "Cats don't get bathed, lovey."

He laughs awkwardly. “Oh."

"I thought that was such an obvious lie that you'd catch on!" You exclaim, grabbing his hand in yours and swinging them back and forth playfully.

Ricky looks around, checking if any staff are lingering in the hallway before swinging open the door and pulling you through.

"Where do you think you're going?" You ask with a giggle as Ricky pulls you towards your car.

"To get ramen with you," he replies with a smile, raising your hand in his above your head so he can twirl you around.

You spin around with a grin, bowing after the impromptu dance move before he continues to pull you along. You watch as his pretty, dangly earring jingles while he runs.

"Fine," you relent with a grin. "But you're gonna have to buy me a lot of ramen to make up for that body joke."

[boyprinzessin]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Super Dangan Ronpa 2 Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Hinata Hajime/Komaeda Nagito Characters: Hinata Hajime, Komaeda Nagito Additional Tags: Post-Neo World Program (Dangan Ronpa), Suicidal Thoughts, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Hopeful Ending, Komaeda Nagito-centric, Self-Reflection, Jabberwock Island (Dangan Ronpa) Summary:

Nagito contemplates how to move forward after awakening from the Neo World Program when he never expected to live past high school.

---

Komahina in 2024? It's more likely than you think. I wrote this 4 years ago and never posted it, but I'm digging through my old drafts and finding stuff that passes my inspection. Hope you enjoy

[birdricks]

i fully truly wholeheartedly believe that if rick had gone in the hole there would have been birdrick moments.

[bp-zb1fics]

My heart keeps on

pairing: na kamden x secret s/o reader

pronouns: none used

genre: canonverse  (finale), angst ish, fluff

tw/tags: long distance relationship, very emo in general, a lot of tears LIKE A LOT, you surprise kamden twice, citing ep 12 as my ref for all this, kinda secret relationship, realities of dating a trainee/idol, reunions so more emo, cuddles, cheek kissing, using a pic as a page break, yes the title is fr kam’s rap in switch ty for noticing 💜

wc: 2178

summary: kamden hasn’t seen you in over a year. you surprise him.

a/n this was supposed to be a gift fic for 101 followers but y'all are 200 now 😭😱 omg so thanks so much for supporting my little blog!!! I know this took a little longer than expected so thanks so much for patiently waiting! 💜Special thanks to the anon who sent me an ask about missing kamden and especially to @seok02 for giving me the motivation to finish this fic and kinda just helping me with the overall process 💜💜💜

check my pinned for more fics!

“Star Creator, we always thank you and love you!”

They wrap up the pajama party livestream, thanking the staff and staying to chat as the cameras are switched off. (Or so they think, lol)

“The vibe was pretty good,” Kamden tells Matthew. The other boy agreeing instantly.

“I think we were able to show new sides of ourselves.”

Suddenly the staff play a recording, surprising them all. It’s video messages from Star creators all over the world for them to watch. Kamden grabs a fluffy pillow as he watches everyone slowly get emotional. Seungeon cries. Zhang Hao cries. Yujin cries. Almost everyone is crying. 

Kamden gets a message from a fan in Norway, which is pretty cool. Then, something he never expected happens. He recognises your voice before he even realises it’s you.

“Kamden, annyeong~”

The pillow falls off his lap.

It’s you. It’s really you. You who he hasn’t been able to video call in a few days because of practice and your schedule and the time difference. He almost calls out your name but it sits tight in his throat, unable to reach you. 

You’re on screen, wearing one of the shirts you’ve stolen from him, holding onto the plushie he bought for you at that silly little shop after you insisted it looked like him. God, he hasn’t seen you in over a year.

“Dude, you okay?” Jay asks him softly.

He must look like an idiot, eyes blown wide, mouth slightly open, hanging onto every word that comes out of your mouth.

“I’ve been watching Boy’s Planet since the teasers were released. And you’ve always been my favourite.”

Kamden knows. You’ve been spamming your chat with him with all these little clips from the PR videos to the behind the scenes footage. Screenshots of you voting for him on the Mnet+ app, comments you’ve left on his fancam videos, even the funny memes you found of him on Twitter all greet him when he opens his phone after practice.

Hope my favourite trainee is doing well and staying healthy! Take care of yourself and know I’m always rooting for you! I love and miss you so much! Hoping for your debut!

Your messages are his favourite. And speaking of:

“I’ve made a little compilation of photos right here. I hope you like how I decorated them, I really tried my best~”

All the trainees ooh and ahh over the handmade album you bring up to the screen compiled with photos of him from the program and cute little notes and stickers. Kamden can’t move, can’t talk. 

Because that’s your album, the one you had insisted on starting when he and you began dating. He knows that if you flipped to the other pages, it would be full of photos of both of you, dates, anniversaries, birthdays, holidays, awards that either of you might have won, events that were important to you or him or both of you, everything carefully labelled. It was one of your favourite things to print out all the photos and he’d help you decorate them.

He can’t believe you kept that up after he left for Korea.

“You’ve stood out to me in every performance. You’re so talented and so many people are cheering you on so please remember to have confidence in yourself.” Your voice wavers a little towards the end of the sentence and as slight as it is, he catches that. He knows you.

Kamden only registers the wetness on his cheeks when the tears are already going, fast and furious. He reaches up, trying to dab them away gently with his sleeve. On screen, you blink rapidly and he knows you’re trying your best not to cry either. Even thousands of miles away, on a video you probably recorded weeks ago, you and him are still in sync. Maybe the rest of the trainees don’t see it but he does. Of course he does.

“I hope you take care of yourself always. Make sure to eat enough and get enough rest. I’ll be voting for you everyday so just do your best in practice and performing and us Star Creators will take care of the rest. We’ll support you so you can achieve your dream of debuting~”

To everyone else, you were just a particularly supportive fan. But to Kamden, you were his person, the one he was devoted to and he can’t help it, sobbing a little into his sleeve. Several pats on the back as the other trainees around him try to comfort him. He can’t help but cry even more. Why were you so far away? Why couldn’t you be here where he could hug you and kiss you and just be with you?

“Na Kamden hwaiting! Saranghae~”

That’s it. He turns and buries his face fully into his hands as if doing that would soak up all the tears that won’t stop coming. Matthew and Jay have scooted over, voices overlapping as they rub his shoulders and back and ask what’s wrong. Even Zhang Hao’s hovering a little on the side, equally concerned.

Maybe he’ll say something later, when there are no mics and no cameras. He’s been training for years and you’ve both agreed that in a career like the one he aspires to get into, keeping it quiet would be the best. Idols don’t date. Idols don’t have a significant other in a whole other country that they call when they can find free time. Even when it comes to casual conversation where there isn’t a camera directly trained on them, Kamden just doesn’t say anything.

They do ask him later. And when he says you’re a close friend he hasn’t seen in awhile, their faces light up in recognition. He leaves it at that.

You walk into the arena with a little trepidation. 

It’s all been a blur. Packing your things, flying to Korea, meeting up with Kamden’s mom and brother who have been kind enough to get you a ticket pass for the family section. Of course, he has no idea you’re even here.

You’re quite a bit more nervous about surprising him than you thought. While you’d give anything to see him again, it was a little risky in such a public venue with so many people watching and cameras everywhere filming almost any angle. Maybe you can be discreet enough if you do break down but Kamden’s on stage, the spotlights bright and on him. Fans are probably filming him on their own devices.

At this point, you’ll just have to trust your boyfriend to keep his reactions to a believable level. You don’t stand too close to his family, trying to keep your distance but also staying near enough that you’d be in the same general direction if Kamden glanced your way.

You end up on the side, along with a few other people who seem to be dressed as discreetly as you, masks on too. The looks you exchange seem to come to a general understanding of why you’re all here and who you’re here for.

Kamden doesn’t notice you when the Top 18 first file in. You don’t expect him to but you see him though. There’s a growing knot in your stomach, emotions welling up from actually seeing him not through a screen but so close that you could walk on stage and touch him. You don’t do that, of course. But still, he’s so near that it almost hurts not being able to throw yourself into his arms for a hug.

You’ve wanted this so much, especially after more than a year of not seeing him. But right now, you feel frozen. You only watch as they start getting into positions for the signal song. Fans are cheering, even the family members and friends of the trainees are calling out words of support. Still, your voice sticks to your throat, as much as you want to shout out, something keeps you from doing it.

Good thing Kamden’s brother does it for you. It probably surprises you and his mom more than it should but who can blame you when he almost never does that? Kamden’s surprised too, maybe it’s a twin thing but he immediately stands up straighter looking for where his brother’s voice is coming from.

And then he sees you.

His eyes meet yours and they widen considerably. His mouth even drops open a little. You’re smiling so much and you’re sure it shows from how your eyes crinkle, just a little glossy. But you’re not going to cry just yet. Instead, you wave at him. He can’t do much more than give a little wave back before they seem to be ready to start filming. 

Suddenly, your heart feels just a little lighter. You step back and watch him dance the signal song. You’ve seen him do it a thousand times, every time you stream his video. It feels so surreal, being able to see it like this, right in front of you. When the song ends, you see his eyes flick back in your direction, searching for your face. When he finds it, his expression brightens.

It’s amazing, watching someone you love do what they love. Sure, you’ve seen Kamden dance, you’ve gotten him to sing and even rap for you a little before. But it’s different with the stage and the lights and the crowd and he looks so comfortable there. You laugh when you see the Jelly Pop teaser, maybe you’ll get him to wear that dress again, just so you can get photos. The final song is almost bittersweet and you try your best but a few tears do slip out.

He’s messaged you about barely making it to the finale, you’ve monitored the program, watched his rank. You both know his chances are slim. But they’re possible. Still, he’s told you that he’s prepared for the equal possibility of not debuting. His company should have plans, he assured you. You watch him walk over to every one of his fellow trainees who’ve made it to debut, offering hugs and congratulating them. And as the number of spots dwindle, you keep your hopes up but you begin to accept it as well.

By the time they’ve called third, you watch as he walks over to Matthew, one of the trainees he’s closest with from what he’s told you. Maybe he lingers a little longer. Maybe you catch his eyes as he looks over. Hwaiting! You mouth, shaking your fists a little in encouragement. The emotions are swirling inside you. When the camera pans over to him, he’s teary eyed, covering his face the way he always does when he gets like that. You can’t help it. The emotions are starting to spill over and you breathe between the occasional tears.

After they announce the ninth place, everything suddenly starts moving so fast and so slow. They wrap up filming. The audience begins to file out. The cameras switch off one by one. You go backstage.

When he walks in, mic gone, still in that uniform that you keep teasing about, you don’t hold back. His arms wrap around you and you fall into him, holding him so tightly you wish you didn’t need to let go. And then both of you start crying.

“I missed you so much, Kam.” You’re holding onto the fabric of his jacket, gripping at it so desperately you’re almost afraid it might rip.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were coming?” He manages, his head somehow buried on your shoulder, tears soaking the cloth of your shirt.

“Surprise?” It comes out weak, a little shaky as you both laugh brokenly through your sobs.

“I can’t believe you’re here.” He holds you even tighter, like he’s afraid you might fade into thin air.

“I’ll be here for a while.” You tell him. “I wish I could’ve come sooner but-”

“It’s okay seriously, you’re here now.” If he squeezes you anymore, you feel like your heart might burst. “I’m so happy to see you.”

He goes back with you. There’s few brief introductions to Jay and Matthew and a few other trainees he’s grown close with, nudges and knowing looks and raised eyebrows. But it’s nothing to stress about, you manage to make it back under the radar.

You feel him watching you as you grab a few more things from your suitcase after both of you have showered and you’re wearing another one of his old shirts. Before you know it, your legs are tangled together, your head resting on his shoulder, your hands intertwined. 

“I don’t want to sleep,” he says quietly. “I don’t want to wake up and find out this is a dream and you aren’t here.”

“You aren’t dreaming, Kam.” You reassure him, lifting your head to kiss his cheek. Even in the privacy of this room, he blushes.

“Even if I didn’t make it, at least I have you.”

“You do, Kam. You always do.” And you know he will make it, one day.