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#breed: pan unicorn
the-character-lounge · 11 months
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Despite the seriousness, he makes Spinel Laugh
"Honestly? I was going to have some ponies look in to the 'Smiles' family." Spinel paused, levitating the tracking box over and flicking the switch on and off. "Nothin' from here either. Not a peep." On closer inspection, it seemed the unicorn didn't get a whole lot of sleep at all.
Randy studied the box before looking up at Spinel. “… A- Any leads?” he asked, with a raised brow, sitting up again and scooting over towards him. “.. I- If we’re n- not getting an- any clicks, w- we could always head over t- to the Smiles r- residence and t- take a peek f- for ourselves.”
"Well. That's the thing..." he frowned, "They're just visiting here. 'Back home' apparently is in upperclass Baltimare, in a huge estate. Apparently dogs are a bigger fucking deal than I thought, they're the founders of dog shows and created many of the pure breeds we have today." He scratched his face, slightly irritated, repeating what he'd heard. "... And there's a 'Sweet Smiles' who is, yes, very active in charity work."
“Okay.. w- well I s- say we maybe t- try to contact Sm- Smiles again. I d- didn’t get his number, b- but he has mine. H- Hopefully, h- he’ll call t- to have lunch sometime… S- So in the meantime, wh- what else sh- should we do? Sh- Should we take a look a- at the house th- they’re temporarily staying at?”
"Mmm... It's a hotel. Not sure where Candy is staying but definitely no doubt where Sugar is, his fiance is kind of hard to miss." His ear flicked, "He said he takes the dogs on walks every morning right?" He paused, suddenly something clicking, his jaw slacking. "No. No way. Randy. He wasn't... That pony we spotted a few days ago... Was he...? With the huge dog...?"
Randy nodded slowly. “O- Oh… I g- guess that part of th- the transmission d- didn’t go through… Y- Yeah wh- when I s- saw him in th- the park with Candy’s dog, I tr- tried to tell you… b- but I guess I wasn’t close enough to get a s- signal.”
Spinel nodded, frowning, "Well then I guess we know where he'll be walking soon, don't we...?" He glanced at Randy, "So what do we need to get from Sugar...?"
“W- Well… h- he doesn’t s- seem to know anything a- about his brother’s.. ‘other’ business…’ I suppose w- we should.. get names? F- Find out wh- who Candy’s friends ar- are, a- and see what th- they know. Y- You’ve taken d- down Osiris b- before… we may b- be able to u- use some of y- your strategies t- to find this f- fucker’s base of o- operations."
Spinel grinned wide suddenly, "You're starting to speak my language here honey." He couldn't help but reach up and play with Randy's ears a little, "We need to find out where Candy goes. Who he knows. How he's still under the radar. Where he's staying. Maybe find out what his plans are next." He pushed his hooves in a way that made Randy's ears flip inside-out and he paused to stare, then slowly built in to a giggle.
Randy stared at him flatly, obviously looking very unamused. Then he made a really dumb looking face with intent to get Spinel to giggle more, his brow all scrunched up and his tongue hanging out the side of his mouth. To top it all off he made a low ‘dur’ noise. He held it for a few moments, knowing how silly and ridiculous he probably looked, then quickly returned to his dead-pan expression. He loved hearing that giggle so much, he was willing to sacrifice a little dignity just to hear it.
Spinel choked a moment, back legs kicking before he built in to an even bigger fit of giggles, having to contain himself by gripping on to Randy's shoulders and breathing between laughs. It was the stupidest thing, but he just couldn't feel anything now but the urge to laugh, even if it was giving him a harder time breathing suddenly.
Randy’s dead pan cracked, and his lips betrayed him as they curled into a tiny smirk, his eyes remaining unamused. He softly patted his ears back down and raised a brow. “.. Y- You’re having w- way too g- good a time over this,” he replied flatly, but unable to stop himself from smiling just a bit bigger with each giggle.
"I-I'm sorry I don't know what's come over me- I just- Ahahahaa- you're so- funny..!" He had to let go and cover his mouth to stifle his giggles, closing his eyes tight and taking a few deep breaths to try and calm down. He felt so stupid reacting like this when everything going on was pretty serious, but instead it just made his laughter a much more welcome experience.
Randy felt himself flush a bit. Spinel thought he was.. funny? He couldn’t help but smile now, a satisfaction and kind of prideful feeling washing away his false irritation. He started giggling with him, unable to hold back the laughter. It’s true what they said, it was contagious. And Spinel’s laugh, that cute, wonderful giggle filled him to the brim. He leaned against him and continued to snicker. “Y- You’re g- gonna pay f- for that y- you jerk… A- And I still n- need to get you f- for last time!” He softly papped his shoulder, but was quick to smoosh his cheek into it and sigh with content.
He finally managed to catch his breath, breathing and speaking in a happy, slightly tired sounding voice since he was worn out from the laughing. "I'll be in debt for a long time then, because I don't plan on paying any time soon." he stuck his tongue out, paused, then nudged his head down to lick Randy's face. Wasn't sure why, he just needed to. Probably the tea.
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nygaardpurcell3 · 2 years
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hermes crocodile bag 3
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05/24-2022 🦄 Horse: Bi and Pan Unicorn (I can't think of any funny names)
I'm now also taking unicorn requests! 💕
if you're able to provide a flag for reference that'd be great, but it's not a necessity.
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thessalian · 2 years
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Thess vs Christmas Day
Another holiday survived! (Look, this is by no means a guarantee with ... well, any family, honestly.) I mean, there were Shenanigans of the highest order at various points, but survived regardless.
First was discovering the phone handset in the living room does not work. This I found out when my stepfather called to make sure I didn’t need a lift to the house - I mean, it’s not far but it’s been cold and damp and that’s always a recipe for fibro flares so honestly, fair enough. Wound up having to bounce between his calling on the mobile to his calling the land line again to make sure it’s just the handset and not the entire phone line having the problem, and that flustered me enough that I forgot both my Lactaid and my gluten-free gravy when I left the house. Didn’t realise until I was all the way down the hill and no fucking way was I walking back up the whole way. Thankfully my stepfather agreed to thicken the gravy with cornstarch and the lactose intolerance ... well, I coped with dessert, more or less.
Anyway, the gifts went over well. I just now remembered to email my mother a list of recommendations of shows to watch on Netflix, because I got her a £15 gift voucher for Netflix so she’s not entirely beholden to the whims of Sky and Disney+. I also got her a T-shirt with a Nova Scotia Duck Tolling Retriever on it - this was by request, since their dog Digby is of that particular breed. And, for her birthday (which was a week ago now but I always make sure there is a separate birthday gift when I see her for gifting at Christmas), unicorn-print socks. She likes cool socks.
For my stepfather, two bottles of interesting beer, a pair of hedgehog socks, and a mug that reads “A Brew Will See You Through”. He liked all of these things, which is good because the man is impossible to shop for.
And I got Digby some dog treats because why leave out the fluffbutt of the family?
As for me? I got everything on my list except the Steam gift card, and when I explained that the reason I ask for those for Christmas rather than my birthday is the Steam Christmas sale, they may have said a thing about giving me part of my birthday present very early to compensate. (Well, when I say ‘very’, I mean a little over two months, but still.) But what I did get was a really good T-fal frying pan, a Le Creuset baking dish that came over from Ireland (because apparently you can’t get Le Creuset stuff in England anymore so Brexit’s fucking with that too), a whole array of spoons and spatulas with a little rotating cup / stand to put them in, and a few microwave-safe food storage containers. Also, more of an “adopting of things they don’t need anymore” than a gift, but still appreciated - a specialised dish for microwaving bacon.
Dinner went a little awry because when I said I really didn’t like turkey all that much ... well, Mum got carried away. She wanted her turkey but didn’t want me to have to eat the turkey if I didn’t like it so she insisted on trying to cook a whole duck and a whole turkey. They can do this because their kitchen has, like, two ovens and they’re both very sci-fi in their design. That was a problem because apparently when they went to turn the turkey-oven down, something reset and turned the oven off entirely, and because no one noticed until after the gift-opening was done, the turkey was going to be very late. Ironically, the duck was fine. Mum got very angry and sulked a lot, but thankfully got over it reasonably quickly. My stepfather didn’t see any reason to be overly upset because we could all just have duck, since we had a whole freakin’ duck that I wasn’t going to eat all by myself, but no, Mum wanted her turkey. (I think she probably had turkey and stuffing as a midnight snack last night. More power to her, say I.)
Things with my mother and I these days are ... well, they’re okay, but I’m sensing some ... it’s not disapproval or anger or disappointment, but there’s sadness there from her. See, I’ve pretty much decided at this point that I’m going to be the person I am around my parentals because it’s too stressful to do otherwise, and while that does involve keeping silent on some issues for the sake of peace around the dinner table (I do that at work too - there is a time and a place), it does involve my refusing to sit still for some things. I am not very tactile, so I’m not going to put up with the hand-holding that Mum always wants to do at Deep Emotional Conversation Points. She may need and want the reassurance; I just don’t like it. I also won’t be babied about things just because she’s had a couple of glasses of wine and wants to do the Mum-Thing that we missed out on during my actual childhood. This makes Mum sad. Too bad; my personal emotional clock doesn’t go back just because she now wants to cuddle and coddle. I could have done with more of that when I was six. I’m not six anymore; that time is done.
Ironically, though, for all she wanted to cuddle and coddle, she also has really selective perception about some things. She was playing around with the dog, and getting him all worked up - and let me tell you, that dog can get some fucking volume on the barking. Also he was about a foot from my head at the time, and that was aggravating the low-key sinus headache I’ve been dealing with since the weather went Silent Hill. Mum didn’t notice that I was actively flinching every time Digby barked (that with her also being about a foot away from me), but my stepdad did; he was nice enough not to call attention to my obviously being in pain, but it was just as clear that he would have if he’d had to - and he almost did, because he had to ask three times before she’d stop teasing the dog.
Between the growing headache, the lactose intolerance making its presence felt (my own fault, really, but still) and a growing fibro flare, I managed to get out unscathed. Honestly, most of it wasn’t bad, but there’s always going to be some stuff, I think. Still, this is stuff I can deal with - the regrets for stuff that got missed in my childhood and how everything turned out on the whole. I don’t waste a lot of time on those - I like who I turned out to be in the end, and I’d be a different me if it hadn’t been for all those things - but I guess I can’t blame my mother for doing so, all things considered. But she’s gonna learn some boundaries. There isn’t even an ‘or’ there; she will learn them. She will be sad about it; that is not my problem.
I hope everybody had as good a Christmas Day as it was possible to have, and that any iffy situations were dealt with sensibly and with a minimum of drama. Now we spend the next week or so bracing for the new year.
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bansheeoftheforest · 3 years
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OC Masterlist
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Welcome to my OC masterlist! I have a lot of ocs! I hoard them like a goblin and I will never stop! SO!!! OCS!!!! So far we got two collections of OCS; The O’Jekylls, which is Dr. Jekyll’s fam, and my very own DND character who I turned into a Lodger! <3
All OCS can be found under the tag #Banshees OCS!
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               --Lodgers--
——————Humans——————
Cederic Beumont
Cederic Beumont is a French artist (and prostitute) turned mad scientist throughout multiple events happening in his early adulthood. He is the oldest twin out of him and his sister, Cassandra, and the two of them were raised by their single father in a small village in France. After the death of their father by the age of twenty, Cederic and his sister travel around Europe until they move to America, where they lived for five years. During those five years, Cederic and Cassandra-- previously inseparable-- have a falling out which ends in Cederic storming out and leaving Cassandra to run the hotel they had set up on the coast of Florida. The falling out, combined with a lot of other stressful and dramatic things happening around him, manages to make Cederic’s mental health crumble until he practically goes insane. Previously an artist, Cederic turns to science in hopes of being able to achieve something that would make him “more” than his sister, who always has been the “smarter” one out of the two of them, which ends up in him studying Frankenstein’s life like the Holy Bible. He gets obsessed with the study of lightning and he gets obsessed with the idea to one-up God, as he previously had been born and raised Catholic, and he feels like he would be able to do everything that Frankenstein failed to do (take care of Creature, own up to the responsibilities, keep the innocent safe, etc) despite having no proof of him being able to do everything differently.
With the help of his boyfriend, Wilhelm, and Wilhelm's biology studying friends, he manages to continue his experiments. He moves between calling himself a Fulminologic Necromancer and a Necromantic Fulminologist, depending on the people he surrounds himself with, as he studies lightning as a whole and applies the knowledge to necromancy. His early experiments involves reviving dead animals with the use of electricity, although he does dabble in alchemy and chemistry when it’s needed.
Around the time he is 30 years old, he hears the word upon the street about the Society For Arcane Sciences in London, England. His boyfriend helps him scrap in enough money for a one-way ticket to London on the promise that they will still hold contact, to which Cederic immediately agrees. He travels to London by ship and marvels over how fantastically dirty and gross the entire city is, there is slums everywhere! So many animals and mythical creatures!! The moment he is within the city walls, he manages to find Sergeant Enoch Brokenshire and pleads for him to show Cederic the way to the Society. Brokenshire is, of course, very put off by this hyper-energetic bastard he can barely hear over his (normally trained away) french accent, but Brokenshire does not get paid enough to care. He basically just grabs Cederic by the collar and drags him like a stray cat over to the Society and to Dr. Henry Jekyll’s office, to which he basically dumps him on the doorstep and leaves. As Jekyll practically collects scientists, and as they already have a necromancer in the Society, Jekyll welcomes Cederic with open arms and shows him around, unaware how Cederic... is an actual mad scientist, not just using that word as a moniker.
Cederic quickly becomes friends with Sinnett and Luckett, all three of them having a knack to blow things up and play with fire. Cederic also loves to harass Tanis, the local necromancer, as he loves that they practically study the same thing and did you know this and that and wouldn’t it be cool to blow up a corpse? You know Moreau might actually have been onto something with the animals and yadeyadeyada-- Tanis does not like Cederic. Cederic thinks that they are best friends.
Cederic joins the Society sometime before the events of TGS, however, immediately jumps all over both Jasper and Frankenstein like a yappy dog excited to have new friends. He is absolutely in love with Frankenstein, much like everyone else, but quickly has a change of heart as he feels she is a wimp, because he could do this and that so much better and why would you do x y and z when you could have done a b c instead. He has a massive ‘R.I.P to them but I’m different’ complex and feels like Frankenstein can’t own up to her work and her legendary image like she should. He thinks he can one-up her, and basically tries to snatch her stuff and studies when she isn’t looking. Creature would very much like to bonk him over the head with a frying pan.
Cederic also has a pet ghost cat-- or more or less spirit cat as she has never actually been alive-- that he has had since he was a baby. He named her Adelaide-Antoinette because he is french and extra like that, and the two of them are actually inseparable, as Adelaide is connected to Cederic through a bunch of magical hijinx. Adelaide can talk to Cederic, however, no one else can hear or see her, making most people think that Cederic is genuinely insane as he is not afraid to walk around talking to himself. The only one who knows about Adelaide is Maijabi, who saw her in one of his ghost mirrors one time, but he thinks its fun to see the other Lodgers thinking that Cederic is insane, so he doesn’t say anything.
Random Trivia: Cederic is originally my DND character, played in a specific type of campaign called Scion. It takes place in the real life world, and our campaign is set during the 1960′s if WW2 had never ended. Cederic and Cassandra were originally forced to flee by the outbreak of the war and the invasions of France. Scion is also based on mythologies, were the player characters (the Scions) are children of the ancient gods. Cassandra and Cederic are children of the egyptian god Bastet, ergo, the ghost cats.
Tags: #Banshees Cederic
Art of Cederic / Original Info dump on Lodger!Cederic
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——————Animals——————
Adelaide-Antoinette
Adelaide-Antoinette is a spirit and companion cat connected to Cederic. She has been by Cederic’s side for as long as he can remember and her, her sass, and her snobbishness were many of the core influences that shaped Cederic into the person he was before his mental breakdown he is today.
Adelaide is a Birman and lives up to the snobbish reputations of such breeds. When she is particularly feisty, she likes to sit on top of Cederic’s head and use him as her steed, and also loves to call him a peasant. She is also very territorial, and very protective of Cederic too. She is basically the epitome of “No one is allowed to bully him but me”. She is also very vocal and loves to have Cederic seem like he is talking to himself. Cederic has a knack to recite Hamlet and other Shakespeare plays to her, and while it’s fun for him, Adelaide wish she could bite his tongue off after the 10th recitation. After so many years, the recites might be up in the thousands.
Adelaide also did not like all the other creatures in the Society immediately, but quickly realized that it was either them or Cederic forever, to which she quickly began to force herself to warm up to them. Her favourite is Jasper’s unicorn, who most likely share her snobbishness, but a close second is Zosi and Griffin’s cat. When she is particularly mad at Cederic, as he tends to neglect her a little once he gets caught up in his work, she likes to hang around Maijabi as he is the only other living person who can see her. Cederic also uses her to spy on the others sometimes, as she can go through walls and can’t be seen.
Tags: -
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        --The O’Jekylls--
——————Humans——————
Collin O’Jekyll
Collin O’Jekyll is Henry Jekyll’s “paternal uncle” and also his make-shift father. Collin and Henry loved each other from day one and the two of them often spend most of their free time in the pastures with Collin’s horses. Collin is an artist, who dabbles in both writing and art, but mainly breeds and sells horses for income, despite not really needing it due to his inheritance. He has always been supportive of Henry’s scientific interests and was the one to take him out to all of the scientific plays that Henry watched as a child, as his parents were less than supportive of the boy’s interests.  While mainly breeding and raising horses, Collin also buys and takes care of every animal he can get his hands on. One of his oldest pets is a male calico Maine Coon named Paddington, who got dumped by his breeder for being male. All of Collin’s animals seem to hate everyone but him, and of course, Henry. Collin also bred and gifted Henry his own horse once he turned 15; a dapple grey Clydesdale named Mayhem, named after her fiery temper. Much like Paddington, she hates everyone but her owner.
Random Trivia: Collin has a very weak immune system and therefore always wears a scarf, no matter the season or weather. He also knows how to sword fight and taught Henry a few tricks before he left Scotland. He is mainly a very cheerful and optimistic guy but won’t hesitate to throw hands if you try to hurt those he loves.
Tags: #Banshees Collin, #Collin O’Jekyll
Art of Collin / Art of Collin and Paddington
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Douglas O’Jekyll
Douglas O’Jekyll is Henry’s “biological” father and Collin’s older brother, but dislikes his role as both father and brother. He is a policeman and known for his ruthlessness and hatred for those he deems have done wrong, and he also has a massive superiority complex. He has always disliked Collin greatly and the two of them have always had a rivalry between them, however, that rivalry got to it’s boiling point when Douglas and Collin were in an accident as kids, mainly caused by Collin unintentionally during a riding trip in the Highlands, which made Douglas earn some of his scars and bred the resentment between the two of them even more. Douglas has always been disapproving of Henry’s... Well, he has always been majorly disapproving with anything that comes to Henry. He dislikes Henry’s love for his uncle, his scientific interests, Henry’s friends, his wish to become a doctor... Douglas dislikes pretty much everything with Henry, which might have its grounds in Henry looking like and taking after a lot from his uncle. As Henry grows older, Douglas’ dislike for both him and Collin grows stronger, and Douglas starts getting outspoken of his hatred for Henry. He also gets physical every once in a while, which was one of the reasons for why Henry left Scotland completely despite Collin doing his best to protect him.
Random Trivia: His scars are either from the Accident, from his work as a policeman and also from many of Collin’s animals. He has a family pedant made out of emerald with a ‘J’ for Jekyll in it, as he is the first born and the heir of the family. He has always felt like Collin was the favourite with everything, both by their parents and by the fact that Douglas’ own son and wife likes Collin more than him, which just bred his resentment for his younger brother even more.
Tags: #Banshees Douglas, #Douglas O’Jekyll.
Digital art of Douglas / Traditional art of Douglas
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Abigail O’Jekyll (Née O’Haggins)
Abigail is Henry’s mother and Douglas’ wife. She comes from a long line of Scottish non-aristocratic nobles and she is the oldest out of six sisters, making her the main heir of the O’Haggins as she has no brothers. In her youth, she was very sought after by many bachelors, and met the O’Jekyll brothers during a ball hosted by her parents. She immediately took a liking to Collin and during the dances, they fell quite in love. However, as the first born, she was forced to marry Douglas instead due to pressuring from her parents who deemed Douglas more worthy than Collin, but she and Collin continued their relationship in secret. Both Douglas and Abigail knows that neither really loves the other all that much but they play their parts due to societal expectations, even if that doesn’t make Douglas any happier when the suspicion of Abigail’s and Collin’s relationships arise. Abigail is, too, not very supportive of Henry’s scientific interests due to all of its stigma and consequences that it can bear, not to mention that she is quite afraid of Douglas’ reactions to Henry’s continuous love for science, but she allows Henry to pursue non-harmful studies in secret to keep him happy, as his happiness is the most important thing for her. She does her best to be a good mother and succeeds in that, although everyone has their bad moments. Random Trivia: While Henry looks more like Douglas and Collin, Hyde takes after Abigail’s side of the family. She wears a locket with an ‘A’ on it with a picture of Collin and Henry inside, which needs a lock to be opened (mostly to keep Douglas from discovering the photo). While she is indifferent to most animals, she loves cats (that are well behaved, which rules out all of Collin’s cats) and she likes horses, although she will never, ever ride one ever again after she fell into a hay bail when Collin tried to get her to ride one of his horses. Tags: #Banshees Abigail, #Abigail O’Haggins.  Old Art of Abigail / Updated Art of Abigail
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——————Animals——————
Paddington
Paddington is one of Collin’s most beloved cats. He is a male, calico coated Maine Coon that got dumped by his breeder for being a male calico (therefore, sterile). He lived in the streets for a while until Collin found and adopted him, to which Paddington immediately became a little diva who hates everyone but Collin and Henry. He is the cause of some of Douglas’ scars and have torn more than one of Abigail’s dresses, but is as good as gold to Collin and Henry.
Tags: #Banshees Paddington
Art of Collin and Paddington / Written description of Paddington
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Mayhem
Mayhem is Henry’s own horse that Collin bred and helped Henry to raise. She is a dapple grey Clydesdale named after her fiery temper and knack for chaos, much like most animals that Collin has been responsible for. She is quite spoiled but very well behaved when needed to be, and she often thinks that she is the mother of those she likes, such as Henry, Paddington, Zosi and Collin. Once Henry left Scotland, she was one of the few things he took with him, and he still owns her to this day; allowing her to live her best, destruction-bringing life in London, striking terror in every stable boy in the entire city.
Tags: #Banshees Mayhem.
Written description of Mayhem
15 notes · View notes
the-miss-lv · 5 years
Note
How is your finger??? And can you tell about any new ideas?
My finger is doing better! Thanks to everyone who asked. It’s all swollen still and itchy like the devil but it’s on the mend.
As for fic ideas, check under the cut!
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So one idea is that Fae are kept like house elves are, their a lot like omegas, smaller than average, submissive, and delicate, very gorgeous to look at. Percival is given Newt as a young boy and grows up with him, Newt never aging but staying forever at a certain age, young adult maybe? Either way Percival’s interest and love for Newt turns sexual when he’s a teenager and it’s not uncommon. Fae are often sexual partners to their masters. So Percival’s life but with Newt at his side for it all.
Another is Percival staying the summer with a fellow auror in UK and meeting his son Newt. Newt would be nineteen or so, just finished schooling and not off to work just yet. Or maybe it would be when he was expelled. Either way, Percival can’t keep his hands to himself and quickly learns that Newt knows nothing about sex at all. Like completely unaware of anything because it’s not taught anywhere and his parents never speak of it. Newt doesn’t even know anal sex is possible. Just this really sexually innocent Newt and dirty bad Percival.     
I also wanted a fic where Theseus or Albus owns omega pet Newt and decides that it’s time to breed his beloved pet. He wants a more meeker alpha but Newt’s drawn to the aggressive growly Graves. So he gets what he wants with his master watching as Newt goes into heat with a alpha around and takes his first ever knot. Graves in a muzzle and master watching so Newt doesn’t get overwhelmed, Newt of course in utter heaven.
I’m working on a fic about student Newt being a omega and sleeping with both professor Graves and Dumbledore. Omegas expected to explore sexually in their teens and so allowed to ask anyone regardless of age or status.
I want to start a long fic about Professor Graves and Dumbledore looking after omega Newt who is being stalked, this fic would be darker.
A nice dark fic about regency time where Newt’s father isolates omega Newt far off in a country house with a small staff and keeps marrying him to terrible alpha men in order to gain more power and wealth. Newt slowly realizing his father doesn’t care about him. His husbands keep dying when they abuse Newt and the rumors are the house is cursed or his mothers ghost haunts them, perhaps the staff themselves protecting Newt, maybe even the omega himself. Newt having a slew of children by various husbands who all have the same dark hair and eyes like the stable master, Percival.
Also ideas for Newt and Albus:
Newt’s a mythical ancient unicorn Albus seeks out to see if his soul is worth/can be redeemed. Newt takes a human form and follows the poor man home, determined to show him he is good. All sorts of sexy times since Newt doesn’t link sex with purity at all. Confused when Albus does. 
Albus realizing when Newt comes to Hogwarts that they have the soul mate mark and are destined to be together. Feeling a bit doubtful of the shy awkward boy but slowly seeking the lack of greed in Newt and how kind he is with his beasts, falling in love and then awkwardly feeling desire when Newt’s older. Complete with cock tease teenage Newt begging Albus to touch him and Albus wants to be a good man but dat assssssss. More so his soul mate’s butt. A butt made for him even. 
Theseus and Newt:
Their father was a powerful auror who was killed with their mother and they where sent into hiding. To disappear better, Newt pretends to be a girl but the game begins to go too far as they begin playing at being like a wife and husband with eventual forbidden sex.
Newt always looked up to Theseus and want to be like him, eventually growing to love him far too much and so hiding it away. Unaware the whole time that Theseus has always felt the same.
There is also a idea where wizards and witches aren’t born with magic but instead their parents make a deal with a powerful magical beast and when the kids are ten they make their own pact and when they come of age eighteen/twenty they make bonds in various ways. The Hogwarts houses are actually powerful creatures Slytherin is a Basilisk, Gryffindor a Griffin, ect. I want to do something with this idea, either Albus/Newt or Percival/Newt.
Anddddd I was playing with this idea that omega are expected to begin relationships, ask alphas out. Alphas are expected to be virgins before marriage and have good reputations if they ever want a omega to propose to them. It’s seem that alphas are too aggressive and so the omegas must make the choice rather than be pushed into it. I just imagine this shy omega Newt trying to get up the nerve to ask someone out. 
Well see what pans out and actually happens. I still have other fics in various states as well, forest god, vampire fic, ect.
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thatkidryder · 6 years
Text
horse roleplay ideas
trying to write a ruleset for a lighthearted horse-themed roleplay game: working title, Horseplay: The NeighRPG
current idea is there will be a variety of goals each horse can strive for, ranging from becoming champion at a show, becoming a literal unicorn, or becoming completely broken and retiring early. they can gain points in certain categories to make this point.
stats so far are
stamina: functionally, this will be constitution
horse: physical ability, like strength, dextarity, clearing obstacles
heart: horse magic, staying calm in stressful situations, being empathetic towards humans and other creatures
I think different breeds might get different bonuses to certain stats or get advantage or disadvantage on certain checks due to hm's(horsemaster's) discresstion. like a shetland pony might get advantage on a heart roll to charm a child, but a -2 horse role when clearing large obstacles.
players will roll for their rider, which will determine more help for rolls and possibly give them an edge over others in regards to their goals. a trainer would be a great asset to a competition oriented horse, but would stand in the way of a potential bucking bronco
spook! will be what happens on any nat 1's. in the event of a spook!, the player will take a penalty tag
tags will be descriptive features players can gather by performing actions or from their backstory. a dressage horse could take the tag 'dressage' and have a +2 to horse rolls in a dressage test. a player who has spooked over a fence might get the tag 'bowed tendon' and take a big penalty to horse checks for the rest of the game.
this is still a work in progress- I'm thinking there will be a "before the show" stage, where players can go for certain tags that would boost their stats that might help them in the long run. things like look for a strangely adorable forest creature who may know where to find a magical spring that would grant the tag "horse magic" for +2 heart rolls, or go eat lots of apples for a bonus to horse rolls in an approaching event.
suggestions from pals are welcome! I've already got playtesters selected, but who knows, if this pans out I'll post more formal rules 🐎🐎🐎
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ghost-the-innocent · 6 years
Text
Things I wish were in vanilla Minecraft:
Camels
Songbirds, or at least canaries
Geodes
Farmable crystals
The ability to place two double chests right next to each other without a gap
Savanna mobs like elephants or lions
Farmable herbs that you could use to make different effects
Cobblestone that turns mossy after a certain length of time
Lily pads that grow back on their own/spread out
Hirable villagers
Seasons
Mirrors
Puddles and mud
A pan so you can look for gold nuggets in rivers
Natural disasters
Moss and lichen and algae
Tamable bats
Sticks as a loot drop from trees
A sorcerer who naturally spawns in a big obsidian tower, like a bigger, stronger witch
Beetles, butterflies, fireflies, bees and honey/wax for candles, which could be crafted into chandeliers
Obsidian/Emerald tools (obsidian is easy to get, but you need diamond tools to mine it/Emerald is super rare to mine, but easy to mine with iron or trade for)
More dog breeds
Lizards
Bags that add extra inventory slots
Usable shelves
An inner world, something "journey to the center of the eartj" like
Falcons or hawks, so you can hunt rabbits
An opposite of the Nether, kinda like the Aether mod but in vanilla
More minerals
More fruits/fruit growing trees
More cakes/customizable cakes
Rare dragons in the overworld that you can fight against and loot, with different types of dragons that hoard different items (so a Gold Dragon hoards gold, a Diamond Dragon hoards diamonds, etc.), and collectable dragon scales for armor
New types of villagers like healers or prophets who can give you quests/hermits that spawn in little huts in certain biomes/nomads or traders who travel with a caravan
Unicorns or fairies (because why the heck not?)
A spear, a knife, or a battle axe (just more weapon options that do different things)
The ability to make way point blocks which leave a marker on your map when placed
The ability to zoom in on a map
Larger ships
Mermaids
Canvas/paints to use on your house
Seals and axlotls
Snakes
Opening windows
Rainbows
Birthstone gems
Werewolves and silver ore, but no guns-- instead, silver-tipped arrows
Alligators
Craft able chain mail squares, made from filling each space in the crafting table with one iron nugget to form a square. Then each square would be used like any other resource to make armor.
Jewelry, or at least the ability to make rings that will give you a skill (like speed or strength). There'd be a jeweler's bench, similar to a crafting table, but you could only make jewelry with it (and vice-versa). In the top middle, you'd put your gem, and in the remaining spaces except for the center, gold or silver.
Some type of Ender ore that could be used for enchantments or to make Ender pearls
Expirable foods, salt, a buildable smokehouse or drying rack for foods to make jerky
Hot air balloons, built from wool in a certain pattern (in the same way you spawn the Wither) or zeppelins
And I'll add to this list as ideas come
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12/09-2021 🦄 Horse: Panpploosa [Pan themed Appaloosa]
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artdjgblog · 4 years
Photo
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​Innerview: ? / AIGA-KC​
October 2007​
Poster: DJG Design​​
​Note: ​The Afterparty poster submission explanation on the subject of diversity​.
Cowboy Mo Bumpkin is slappin’ five with his pal Uncle Glen on their first day to romp together following a thankfully non-routine tragic accident. An incident that would change them forever. The following extremely long and hastily written paragraph is borrowed by the author from Mo and Uncle Glen’s own testimonies. Folks, this ain’t reality T.V., it’s reality. Mo is enjoying a mild, boot heelin’ frolic with his friend who is in need of a best friend after losing his back leg quarters in a bear trap. You see, the bear trap was a big ol’ bully boy. Mr. Bumpkin has set out plenty of snares in his day. He never thought twice about it because the steel teeth and springs always kept his big belly even bigger (though, he most certainly can hide his weight well, and he exercises at a recolored pace). Mo can feed off a bear for a blemin’ month or a month and a half (pending on if he got a special deal on pie from Old Lady Cryer back in town, which helped him save his good meat back a bit because that Old Lady Cryer pie was so good it made his belly ache and cry and holler all evening for several days’ even after his programs were finished). Well, one day two weeks ago last Thursday on a routine trappin’ check, Mo heard the most awful of cries coming from on yonder, echoing down there in that valley not too far, but just far enough to where all that was noticeable in the thick brush and thickets was a blur and a rustle. A face stricken with horror was had by Mo when he approached closer and sawed to his big black eyes (eyes that never got so big unless pie and hickory smoked tender bear meat with Rosedale’s BBQ sauce got him to bed early with a swift kick in that juicy spot in between the bread basket and the bible belt) the sight of his soon-to-be best friend Uncle Glen all caught up in a big bear trap something fierce. The sight was almost as bad as the shriek belching from deep within the unicorn, a sound not much unlike that of a mama bunny rabbit frightened from the snarled toothy scare of the clever weiner dogs who found a way to nudge up the makeshift fencing steeple and stick lock apparatus on the silver-sided smoke house to get a peek or a piece of some new born baby bunnies binkying all over the cage. Oh, and did Uncle Glen or Mo mention to you that Uncle Glen is a unicorn? Yep, full-blooded and with a bit of sparkle and he don’t need to poop or vomit puff paint, glitter and stickers for you to recognize this worldly trait. And these gentle creatures don’t get hot unless they are under the knife or in deep threat from weiner dogs. The knife in this episode is Uncle Glen’s own beautiful, yet extremely sharp, solo horn tusk jutting from his forehead. Did you know that a rhino was once mistaken for a unicorn? Geesh, what morons? Uncle Glen can’t remember the last time he was mistaken for a rhino, maybe a tad from the backside after a winter of swollen hips and troubles with confidence. Enough of that, by all means his back side would never be the same as he was heroically half-way thru sawing off (well, more like jabbing until the raw flesh poked apart and dilapidated from the penetrations of multiple action pierces, like a butcher with a big meat thermometer, bad aim, judgement and nothing else to do on the job) his own back legs out of that trap when Mo came upon him on knees and hands clasped, begging for forgiveness, or at least an army enlistment in order for his own legs to feel such a thing as the knife or rusty civil war saw blade, without pain killers, during a quick man’s land mine field amputation in war time. To make matters worse, and the clock and conscience big hands tick swifter, was the fact that the very bear Mo had planned to be slicing open and cooking tonight was right to his and Uncle Glen’s stage left looking quite queerly at the situation. Instantly, Mo somehow grabbed his bearings, woke-up for a second and tossed his big Slavic Yukotang stogie (an import only, hard to get cig, known for it’s custard-flavored aroma and taste…Mo was that one thing…retardant to milk? Non-lactos or some sort?) at the brown bear. Because, we all remember from school that certain breeds of brown bear have a lovingly glow for custard and for smoking cigars and kicking it. Though, Mo wasn’t going to kill two birds with one stone…nor, would he let Uncle Glen go as well. Well, while the brown bear was huffing and kicking so low as to finally put together properly, on acid free paper, that stamp collection she’d been collecting since the late ’80s and remembering the wise words her distant cousin (twice removed) Charcoalio said back in the day when kids actually listened, especially to bears, Mo found just enough time to shoot four rounds off and out of his trusty seven shooter (though of course the safety stuck a bit as he pulled the barrel out of his boot). No silly, he didn’t shoot the poor bastard pile that was left of Uncle Glen. He shot up in the air to get the attention of a drunk skinny dipping down the way, panning for gold (unicorn glitter?) on the side with a pair of sheep skin trousers with a butt flap that kept coming undone from those underpants and undoing with it any chance of striking it rich (at least in a mineral deposit format). Mo never did knowed the name of this drunk. Everybody just called him Drunk. But, the good thing about Drunk is that he didn’t need his buggy parked and beat all to Heaven no longer because Drunk don’t need to be out there driving on the open ragweed ranges. Mo wasn’t no good worth a lick at written exams, but he was pretty confident in thinking and doing on his own clock, crown and crooked back. The sun began to get closer to the earth as poor Uncle Glen sat bleating and bleeding to death, dragging himself in pain to the river. Would he hold his head under until the last breath or bleed to death getting there? Or, was he headed this way in respect to not stain the wild grass, to sit in the shallow end and let the clear water carry his DNA down to the school yard about 67 yards to the south as the children celebrated an after school birthday outing for their instructor with what they thought was red flavored (Cherry?) Kool-Aid in the river bed (p”Party with the big man!”). Well, Mo thought quick (you already knew that) and asked kind Drunk permission for use of his wagon wheels. He shot twice more to bust the wood wheels free and applied them on his friend, using the still warm shell casings to solder shut Uncle Glen’s stumps. -djg
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18 classic viral videos that will always be hilarious
New Post has been published on https://funnythingshere.xyz/18-classic-viral-videos-that-will-always-be-hilarious/
18 classic viral videos that will always be hilarious
It’s Viral Market Crash week on Mashable. Join us as we take stock of the viral economy and investigate how the internet morphed from a fun free-for-all to a bleak hellscape we just can’t quit.
Long before Vine and Instagram, sites like Newgrounds, eBaum’s World, and of course YouTube were the breeding grounds for viral video legends. 
The viral video market has sadly taken a greedy turn for the worst. Thankfully, we can still look back on the iconic viral videos that set a standard for internet greatness. 
It’s been years since these videos first premiered, but they’ve never faded from our hearts or minds.
1. Grape Lady Falling
[embedded content]
What started off as friendly competition turned into a few broken ribs and viral fame. Melissa Sander aka “Grape Lady,” was reporting for Fox 5 in Atlanta at a vineyard in the late ’90s when she took quite the tumble.
After falling to the ground letting out very strange sounding “ows,” the camera returns to the newsroom where the two hosts comment on how she could possibly be hurt.
This video was uploaded in 2007 and has racked up almost 20 million views. 
2. Leprechaun in Mobile, Alabama
[embedded content]
The “Leprechaun in Mobile, Alabama” video was one of the first news stories to achieve viral status on YouTube back in 2006. The story itself was about a leprechaun sighting that turned the community into a search party.
An amazing amateur sketch of the magical creature, as well as interviews with people who had different theories ranging from “it could be a crackhead,” to “it’s casting a shadow,” made the video so entertaining. 
[embedded content]
This man having a meltdown over witnessing a double rainbow in 2010 proves we should enjoy the simpler things in life. Apparently over 45 million people agree. 
Drugs may or may not have been involved in the making of this viral video. 
[embedded content]
Arguably THE original YouTube viral video. Liam Kyle Sullivan released this banger in 2007 and it has been viewed over 67 million times. 
Kelly, who is played by Sullivan, is not happy with her birthday gifts. When her father asks what she’s going to do with her life, she fiercely responds, “I’m going to get what I want.” 
What happens next is the best song dedicated to shoes known to humanity. Sullivan has also made quite the career following his viral fame. 
[embedded content]
Poor Chris Crocker, all he wanted was for everyone to leave Britney Spears alone. During Britney’s rough spot in 2007, Crocker went on YouTube and hysterically begged the entire internet to leave the pop star be.
This video became an instant viral sensation, and Crocker got a lot of backlash from all over the internet for his femme appearance and sobbing. Since the release of this video, Crocker rose above the haters, and went on to become a porn star, blogger, and a singer-songwriter. 
6. Fenton
[embedded content]
A peaceful stroll through Richmond Park in London turns to chaos when someone off in the distance can be heard screaming “FENTON.” When the person recording the video pans right, a herd of deer being chased by a dog runs past.
A few seconds later the dog’s owner can be seen chasing the him while screaming “Jesus Christ, Fenton!” Thankfully no one gets hurt.
This video was uploaded in 2011 and it currently has over 18 million views.
[embedded content]
A classic video for any Harry Potter fan out there. The “Potter Puppet Pals” went on to become a successful YouTube skit that garnered millions of views. 
The first episode of the series “The Mysterious Ticking Noise” released in 2007 has over 181 million views. Those of us nerds who watched the video back then, most definitely still know the lyrics in 2018.
[embedded content]
After Stephen Quire gets his World of Warcraft subscription canceled, his brother Jack (aka wafflepwn) recorded his brother’s reaction to the punishment. Stephen goes on to throw the biggest tantrum in tween history, not knowing Jack left the camera in the room to record it all for YouTube.
Jack went on to record more videos of Stephen freaking out, but most of them were deemed fake or scripted. Nothing compares to the first video of the series that came out in 2009 that has garnered almost 100 million views. 
Real or fake, the original is still just as ridiculous as it was when it was released in 2009.
[embedded content]
Gary Brolsma aka the “Numa Numa Guy” was out here living his best life on Newgrounds in 2004. In this video, Brolsman was lip-syncing to O-Zone’s “Dragostea Din Tei,” and he became an instant meme and viral icon. 
Although the Newgrounds took the video down for licensing reasons, someone uploaded the video on YouTube so his legacy lives on. According to an old BBC article in 2006, the video was estimated to have been viewed 700 million times, just falling shortly behind the next video on this list. 
[embedded content]
Ghyslain Raza, aka “Star Wars Kid” was also living his truth during the early days of the viral internet. While he didn’t intend for this video of him in 2002 to get thrown on the web, his attempt to copy Darth Maul’s lightsaber moves became one of the most viewed viral videos of all time. 
According to an article by NBC in 2007 Raza’s video had gotten well over 1 billion views on the internet since. Sadly, the price of this kind of internet fame caused Raza to get teased and bullied from people in school, and all over the internet.
Raza rose above this, and is now a lawyer who takes on many legal cases surrounding cyberbullying. He is absolutely following the way of the Jedi, and we’re here for it.
[embedded content]
Personally, I never understood the appeal of this video. But what do I know? I might just be one out of the almost 1 billion people who watched this video that just doesn’t understand why Charlie biting his brother’s finger is funny. 
[embedded content]
Sweet Brown’s iconic “Ain’t nobody got time for that” line was a big mood for 2012 when this video came out. There was also an auto-tuned version that accompanied the video that achieved its own viral fame.
Since her narrow escape with a fire at her apartment complex, Kimberly Wilkins starred in a Tyler Perry movie and got a shoutout from Beyoncé.
[embedded content]
Another Newgrounds relic from 2005, this animated video pit comic and pop culture’s most recognizable figures against each other in a battle to the death, along with a song narrating the entire scene. I don’t want to spoil who wins, so give this video with over 20 million views a watch.
[embedded content]
When I first watched this video in 2009, I was expecting something really horrifying or creepy to happen at the end because you can’t trust anything on the internet with a catchy tune and a cute duck. Thankfully this cheery viral video with over 350 million views was only annoying as this duck who keeps asking for grapes. 
[embedded content]
Originating from Newgrounds, “Charlie the Unicorn” was an iconic flash cartoon that had everyone saying “shun the nonbeliever,” like someone who was tripping on something from Candy Mountain. The video first came out in 2005, and was uploaded onto YouTube in a year later. In 2008 an official version of the first episode was uploaded and currently has over 30 million views.
[embedded content]
Apparently, “Apparently Kid” has to be on this list with his viral news interview that has over 30 million views. Noah Ritter stole the hearts of everyone on the internet with his hilarious usage of the word “apparently” during an interview with a local news station at a county fair in 2014. 
Ritter also caught the attention of Ellen Degeneres, who later brought him on the show for a very cute interview. He’s also apparently, over the word, “apparently.”
[embedded content]
Everyone talks about Rick Rolling, but “HEYYEYAAEYAAAEYAEYAA,” which came out around the same time, is so underrated. According to KnowYourMeme, He-Man singing 4 Non Blondes’ “Whats Up” first made an appearance on the Something Awful forums back in 2005. The video then made a few appearances on the eBaum’s World forums in 2005. 
It eventually found its way onto YouTube in 2006 where it continued to go viral before finally getting its official video and meme title. Truly, a viral relic from the past that has over 100 million views today.
[embedded content]
Look at how happy Fatso was back in ’80s playing his keyboard! Even though this kitty cat was long gone before YouTube even became a thing, his owner Charlie Schmidt allowed Fatso’s legacy to live on by uploading his amazing piano skills onto the site in 2007. 
After becoming a massive meme and viral icon, Keyboard Cat continues to dazzle audiences all over the world. With over 50 million views this cat — from a time period before internet fame wasn’t even a concept — is truly timeless.
Source: https://mashable.com/article/best-viral-videos/
0 notes
18 classic viral videos that will always be hilarious
Tumblr media
It’s Viral Market Crash week on Mashable. Join us as we take stock of the viral economy and investigate how the internet morphed from a fun free-for-all to a bleak hellscape we just can’t quit.
Long before Vine and Instagram, sites like Newgrounds, eBaum's World, and of course YouTube were the breeding grounds for viral video legends. 
The viral video market has sadly taken a greedy turn for the worst. Thankfully, we can still look back on the iconic viral videos that set a standard for internet greatness. 
SEE ALSO: Elon Musk was once tech's angel. Now he's an overplayed meme.
It's been years since these videos first premiered, but they've never faded from our hearts or minds.
1. Grape Lady Falling
youtube
What started off as friendly competition turned into a few broken ribs and viral fame. Melissa Sander aka "Grape Lady," was reporting for Fox 5 in Atlanta at a vineyard in the late '90s when she took quite the tumble.
After falling to the ground letting out very strange sounding "ows," the camera returns to the newsroom where the two hosts comment on how she could possibly be hurt.
This video was uploaded in 2007 and has racked up almost 20 million views. 
2. Leprechaun in Mobile, Alabama
youtube
The "Leprechaun in Mobile, Alabama" video was one of the first news stories to achieve viral status on YouTube back in 2006. The story itself was about a leprechaun sighting that turned the community into a search party.
An amazing amateur sketch of the magical creature, as well as interviews with people who had different theories ranging from "it could be a crackhead," to "it's casting a shadow," made the video so entertaining. 
3. Double Rainbow
youtube
This man having a meltdown over witnessing a double rainbow in 2010 proves we should enjoy the simpler things in life. Apparently over 45 million people agree. 
Drugs may or may not have been involved in the making of this viral video. 
4. Shoes
youtube
Arguably THE original YouTube viral video. Liam Kyle Sullivan released this banger in 2007 and it has been viewed over 67 million times. 
Kelly, who is played by Sullivan, is not happy with her birthday gifts. When her father asks what she's going to do with her life, she fiercely responds, "I'm going to get what I want." 
What happens next is the best song dedicated to shoes known to humanity. Sullivan has also made quite the career following his viral fame. 
5. Leave Britney Alone
youtube
Poor Chris Crocker, all he wanted was for everyone to leave Britney Spears alone. During Britney's rough spot in 2007, Crocker went on YouTube and hysterically begged the entire internet to leave the pop star be.
This video became an instant viral sensation, and Crocker got a lot of backlash from all over the internet for his femme appearance and sobbing. Since the release of this video, Crocker rose above the haters, and went on to become a porn star, blogger, and a singer-songwriter. 
6. Fenton
youtube
A peaceful stroll through Richmond Park in London turns to chaos when someone off in the distance can be heard screaming "FENTON." When the person recording the video pans right, a herd of deer being chased by a dog runs past.
A few seconds later the dog's owner can be seen chasing the him while screaming "Jesus Christ, Fenton!" Thankfully no one gets hurt.
This video was uploaded in 2011 and it currently has over 18 million views.
7. Potter Puppet Pals
youtube
A classic video for any Harry Potter fan out there. The "Potter Puppet Pals" went on to become a successful YouTube skit that garnered millions of views. 
The first episode of the series "The Mysterious Ticking Noise" released in 2007 has over 181 million views. Those of us nerds who watched the video back then, most definitely still know the lyrics in 2018.
8. Greatest Freak Out Ever
youtube
After Stephen Quire gets his World of Warcraft subscription canceled, his brother Jack (aka wafflepwn) recorded his brother's reaction to the punishment. Stephen goes on to throw the biggest tantrum in tween history, not knowing Jack left the camera in the room to record it all for YouTube.
Jack went on to record more videos of Stephen freaking out, but most of them were deemed fake or scripted. Nothing compares to the first video of the series that came out in 2009 that has garnered almost 100 million views. 
Real or fake, the original is still just as ridiculous as it was when it was released in 2009.
9. Numa Numa Guy
youtube
Gary Brolsma aka the "Numa Numa Guy" was out here living his best life on Newgrounds in 2004. In this video, Brolsman was lip-syncing to O-Zone's "Dragostea Din Tei," and he became an instant meme and viral icon. 
Although the Newgrounds took the video down for licensing reasons, someone uploaded the video on YouTube so his legacy lives on. According to an old BBC article in 2006, the video was estimated to have been viewed 700 million times, just falling shortly behind the next video on this list. 
10. Star Wars Kid
youtube
Ghyslain Raza, aka "Star Wars Kid" was also living his truth during the early days of the viral internet. While he didn't intend for this video of him in 2002 to get thrown on the web, his attempt to copy Darth Maul's lightsaber moves became one of the most viewed viral videos of all time. 
According to an article by NBC in 2007 Raza's video had gotten well over 1 billion views on the internet since. Sadly, the price of this kind of internet fame caused Raza to get teased and bullied from people in school, and all over the internet.
Raza rose above this, and is now a lawyer who takes on many legal cases surrounding cyberbullying. He is absolutely following the way of the Jedi, and we're here for it.
12.  Charlie Bit My Finger
youtube
Personally, I never understood the appeal of this video. But what do I know? I might just be one out of the almost 1 billion people who watched this video that just doesn't understand why Charlie biting his brother's finger is funny. 
13. Ain't Nobody Got Time For That
youtube
Sweet Brown's iconic "Ain't nobody got time for that" line was a big mood for 2012 when this video came out. There was also an auto-tuned version that accompanied the video that achieved its own viral fame.
Since her narrow escape with a fire at her apartment complex, Kimberly Wilkins starred in a Tyler Perry movie and got a shoutout from Beyoncé.
13. The Ultimate Showdown
youtube
Another Newgrounds relic from 2005, this animated video pit comic and pop culture's most recognizable figures against each other in a battle to the death, along with a song narrating the entire scene. I don't want to spoil who wins, so give this video with over 20 million views a watch.
14.  The Duck Song
youtube
When I first watched this video in 2009, I was expecting something really horrifying or creepy to happen at the end because you can't trust anything on the internet with a catchy tune and a cute duck. Thankfully this cheery viral video with over 350 million views was only annoying as this duck who keeps asking for grapes. 
15. Charlie the Unicorn
youtube
Originating from Newgrounds, "Charlie the Unicorn" was an iconic flash cartoon that had everyone saying "shun the nonbeliever," like someone who was tripping on something from Candy Mountain. The video first came out in 2005, and was uploaded onto YouTube in a year later. In 2008 an official version of the first episode was uploaded and currently has over 30 million views.
16. Apparently Kid
youtube
Apparently, "Apparently Kid" has to be on this list with his viral news interview that has over 30 million views. Noah Ritter stole the hearts of everyone on the internet with his hilarious usage of the word "apparently" during an interview with a local news station at a county fair in 2014. 
Ritter also caught the attention of Ellen Degeneres, who later brought him on the show for a very cute interview. He's also apparently, over the word, "apparently."
17. HEYYEYAAEYAAAEYAEYAA
youtube
Everyone talks about Rick Rolling, but "HEYYEYAAEYAAAEYAEYAA," which came out around the same time, is so underrated. According to KnowYourMeme, He-Man singing 4 Non Blondes' "Whats Up" first made an appearance on the Something Awful forums back in 2005. The video then made a few appearances on the eBaum's World forums in 2005. 
It eventually found its way onto YouTube in 2006 where it continued to go viral before finally getting its official video and meme title. Truly, a viral relic from the past that has over 100 million views today.
18. Keyboard Cat
youtube
Look at how happy Fatso was back in '80s playing his keyboard! Even though this kitty cat was long gone before YouTube even became a thing, his owner Charlie Schmidt allowed Fatso's legacy to live on by uploading his amazing piano skills onto the site in 2007. 
After becoming a massive meme and viral icon, Keyboard Cat continues to dazzle audiences all over the world. With over 50 million views this cat — from a time period before internet fame wasn't even a concept — is truly timeless.
WATCH: Meet the man who makes music with vegetables
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The Alphabetical List of Mythical Creatures
List of Mythical Creatures A-C
Alicorn - The name for a winged unicorn.
Banshee - A spirit appearing as a frenzied old woman whose high pitched shriek prophesied a death soon to come.
Basilisk - A legendary lizard who could kill a man with its stare.
Bigfoot - A type of Sasquatch native to North American forests.
Black Dog - An evil spirit dog that stalks city streets at night.
Black Eyed Beings  - They take human form but have black, soulless eyes and emanate a sense of pure evil.
Bogeyman - A semi-corporeal being whose sole purpose is to scare children.
Bogle - A ghostly being whose purpose is to confuse and scare humans and other creatures.
Bray Road Beast  - The nickname for a werewolf-like creature seen multiple times in Wisconsin.
Brownies - Small humanoid creatures wearing all brown clothing who sneak into homes at night to help with household chores.
Centaur  - Half-men, half-horse creatures that ran wild and unruly.
Cerberus  - The three-headed dog that guards the entrance to Hades.
Charybdis  - The whirlpool on one side of the Strait of Messina that swallowed ships that came too close to it.
Chimera  - Part-lion, part-goat, part-snake - all monster.
Cockatrice - A flying part-rooster/part-snake that could kill with its stare.
Cyclops - The one-eyed giant who captured and ate people.
Cynocephalus  - A member of an ancient race of men with the heads of dogs.
List of Mythical Creatures D-G
Demon  - Malevolent spirits of Hell who battle humans for control of their souls.
Doppelganger  - Apparitions of people that occur in impossible situations.
Dragon - Giant, flying, fire-breathing lizards who often guard treasure.
Dwarf - A short, stalky humanoid who live in underground mining communities.
Echidna  - The snake-woman who became the mother of most Greek monsters.
Elf - A race of pointy-eared humanoids who excel in magic and archery.
Fairy  - A small, flying humanoid with magical abilities.
Ghosts - Spirits of the dead whose souls remain in the realm of the living.
Gnome - A small, humanoid creature who lives and moves beneath the earth.
Goblin - A grotesque, troublesome little creature with a strong greed for gold and jewels.
Golem  - Magically animated human-shaped creatures typically made of solid stone.
Gorgon - The snake-haired and snake-bodied humanoid that was created in its mother's image. Its stare could turn a person to stone. Medusa became one of these creatures in a later myth.
Griffin  - A creature with the body of a lion, the tail of a snake, and the head and wings of an eagle.
Grim Reaper - The embodiment of death itself, the Grim Reaper comes to take your soul to the afterlife.
List of Mythical Creatures H-N
Hobgoblin - A type of Brownie who is inherently less helpful and more mischievous, even to the point of causing harm if antagonized.
Hydra - The nine-headed serpent who grew two new heads for every one that was cut off.
Imp - Small, mischievous creatures who liked to play pranks on people.
Ladon (Python) - The snake that guarded the golden apples in the Garden of the Hesperides.
Leprechauns - Small, bearded men who have a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.
Loch Ness Monster - The elusive sea-monster from the Loch Ness in Scotland.
Manticore  - A mythical beast with a lion's body and a human's head.
Medusa - A disciple of Athena who was turned into a gorgon.  She had the hair of snakes and could turn men to stone with her gaze.
Mermaids  - Sea creatures with the head and torso of a woman and the tail of a fish.
Minotaur  - The creature with the head and legs of a bull and the torso of a man, who guarded the exit to The Labyrinth.
Mothman  - A winged creature in the shape of a man with hypnotic red eyes sighted in West Virginia.
Mutants  - A term describing abnormal creatures created by genetic or environmental mutations.
Nemean Lion  - The giant lion with impenetrable hide who becomes the constellation Leo.
New Jersey Devil  - A flying creature with a high-pitched scream and a horse-like head native to the New Jersey Pine Barrens.
Nymph - Divine female nature spirits who inhabit certain natural sites.
List of Mythical Creatures O-S
Ogre - An ugly, oversized humanoid creature with great physical strength and little intelligence.
Orthros  - The two-headed monster dog.
Pegasus - Technically the proper name of Bellerophon's winged horse, which became the general name for winged horses.
Phoenix - The golden bird who, at the end of its life, burst into flames only to be reborn again.
Pixie - A small humanoid creature with pointy ears who likes to cause mischief.
Sasquatch - Large, hairy, man-like beasts that live in the woods.
Satyr - Half-men, half-goats who were wild and lustful.  The god Pan was one of these.
Scylla  - The man-eating beast that lived on the opposite side of the Strait of Messina from Charybdis.
Sea Monsters - The generic term for several breeds of water-based monsters.
Sea-Goat  - The half-goat, half-fish who are the children of Pricus, who becomes the constellation Capricorn.
Shade - The ghosts of dead people before they are admitted entrance to Hades.
Shapeshifters  - Humans who can willingly take the form of an animal while maintaining their consciousness.
Sirens  - Man-eating beautiful women whose song compels men to them.
Sphinx - The half-human, half-lion that forces those it meets to answer its riddles, or die.
Sprite - A category of elemental, fairy-like spirits, invisible to humans (a Sylph is one of these).
Sylph - An invisible, fairy-like being dedicated to the element of air.
List of Mythical Creatures T-Z
Thunderbird  - A giant bird that creates storms with its wings.
Typhon  - The fire-breathing giant who challenged Zeus for control of Mount Olympus. Also the father of most Greek monsters.
Unicorn  - A magical horse with a single horn on its forehead.
Valkyries - Mythical Norse female divinities who choose heroes to die in battle and carry them to the great Valhalla.
Vampire  - Legend's most charming bloodsucker gets a whole section of this website all to itself.
Wendigo  - An evil spirit that possesses humans and turns them into cannibals.
Will-o'-the-wisp  - Strange flame-like lights that seem to beckon travelers to follow.
Werewolf  - Human by day, wolf by night.
Wraith - Evil spirits of the dead who are trapped on Earth.
Zombie  - The living dead who feed on human flesh.
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garynsmith · 6 years
Text
3 reasons investing is a no-brainer for real estate agents
http://ift.tt/2DkUYXP
If real estate is a numbers game, the numbers are currently fairly depressing. According to the National Association of Realtors (NAR) there were approximately 2 million real estate agents in the United States in 2016.
According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics (BLS), the median pay for real estate agents in 2016 was $46,410 per year, which translates to an hourly rate of $22.32 per hour based on a 40-hour work week.
What active agent works only 40 hours?
And while agents continue to work harder and longer, they are faced with the complexities of a market that forces them to spend even more to compete online with the featured agents on the big real estate portals. That means less money in their pockets.
Having worked with investors worldwide, I know how important a great agent is to the investment process. From market knowledge to your professional network, you hold many of the keys to a successful outcome — and great ROI — for investors.
Why shouldn’t your skills earn you more dividends?
BoomTown brings growth-minded teams into the digital age
Professional lead gen, a sleek website and a next-gen CRM in one platform READ MORE
If you’ve been depending on short-term and intermittent earnings for your financial stability, how can real estate investing offer you long-term wealth building potential? Why is real estate investing better than a 401k or playing the stock market?
Below, we’ll discuss three reasons agents should cash in on their knowledge through real estate investing.
Real estate investing uses what you know
You’re looking at market statistics and data every day. You have your ear to the ground, and you know what areas are generating buzz. You’re meeting with colleagues and hearing their stories of where listings just aren’t moving or where they’re selling like hotcakes.
You have access to investors, lenders, title company reps and more, as well as colleagues who have clients who are potential sources of investment leads.
Do what you do best — study the market, connect people, negotiate, manage the transaction.
It offers a variety of models to suit you and your market
Have access to a reliable contractor and crew? Fix-and-flip might work well for you.
Do you live in a college town or near a military base? Buy-and-hold might be a winning strategy with all of those potential renters.
Perhaps some combination of the two would work if you have access to the capital you need to reliably fund your projects.
However you choose to focus your time, money and energy in real estate investment, you are bound to find an investment opportunity that works well for you and for the amount of risk you are able to tolerate.
Don’t want to handle your projects personally? Use your contacts to find a well-run real estate investment group, and use your market knowledge to evaluate the projects they are considering.
You may find you can buy in for a few thousand, then increase your stake over time.
Real estate investments produce returns you just can’t find in other investment models
Compared to the volatility of the stock market or the meager returns of CDs and bonds, real estate investing can produce returns that are exponentially greater than those of other stock market-based investments.
Although corporate unicorns are, as the name suggests, a rare breed, market and property appreciation is far more frequent and reliable.
In addition, there are far fewer moving parts in a real estate investment, which reduces volatility and risk. No need to worry about an embezzling CFO or a class-action lawsuit against the company.
Although real estate investment has its own risks, you’re far more likely to be able to choose your team and work with dependable professionals you know and trust.
Plus, your market knowledge is more likely to steer you in the right direction than an earnings report that may not pan out or an international investment in a market you’ve never heard of.
Whether you have capital to work with or start out wholesaling to build your initial nest egg, start creating opportunities to move into real estate investment.
You’re bound to find that it will create new avenues for financial and professional growth and can help you scale your business faster than you ever thought possible.
Adapted from Abhi Golhar’s upcoming book “Make It Rain: The new launch model for moving from real estate agent to investor.”
Abhi Golhar is the host of Real Estate Deal Talk in Atlanta. Follow him on Instagram or connect with him on LinkedIn. 
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smokeybrandreviews · 7 years
Text
NBA Rant: Inmates Running The Asylum
-So i wrote this yesterday but couldn’t post it. Apparently, Tumblr wouldn’t let me log in. So, i’m posting it today. I know there was a lot of sh*t that happened last night but i’ll get to it in the next rant.-
Whoo, boy, this post-Paul Clippers tenure has been a goddamn roller coaster!
We are 19 games into the season and, goddamn, what the hell is going on in Lesser-LA? You lose Paul. Get shafted in that trade for a bunch of sub-par and injury prone role players. Give Griffin a 173 mil contract on the hopes he’ll actually see the court for the duration and then he goes blows out his knee. Your Coach/GM favors the f*ck out of his mediocre son so you constantly miss out of beneficial trades because he refuses to move his kid, which breeds animosity in the locker room. You have absolutely no offensive talent on the floor outside of the injured Griffin. AND you’re next best asset, Jordan, is on the way out. Cats have actively been shopping him around, too! The Clippers are a f*cking mess. You’d  think Junior Buss was running that team. While i’m on that topic...
Should the Clips fire Doc?
It’s been, what? Half a decade and the closest they’ve gotten to a title was the second round? Seriously, the Clips have never been contenders, as much as analyst want you to believe otherwise. Now that they’ve lost Paul in a terrible trade facilitated by Doc, Lost Griffin to injury for the foreseeable future, and have had rumblings of nepotism f*cking up that locker room chemistry, methinks it’s about time for a change. There are some interesting candidates available. Speaking of…
The Grizzlies have fired their coach in an attempt to placate a disgruntled Marc Gasol because that’s how you assure a talent like that, with uncertainty.
Dude’s in a contact year and you’ve installed an interim coach, after firing the coach he actually like, the season before last. Dave Jeager is a goddamn savant at basketball and you send him away in favor of Fizdale? Really? Okay, buddy. On top of all of this, you still might trade Gasol? Why even fire Fizdale then? That doesn’t make a lick of sense!! I had the Grizz in the Playoffs with the lack of competition out West but this is shenanigans. They might as well tear it down and start from scratch. Like the Clippers.
Cats are kind of overreacting to the Cavs right now.
Whether we want to believe they’ve lost it or not, they are still the clear favorites out East. There are no teams that, in a playoff environment, can beat the Cavs in a seven game playoff series. No teams except for the Celtics. The C’s are a force right now and it’s scary. They’ve played brilliant hoop and rattled off an pretty substantial win streak. It’s early, of course, but barring another catastrophic injury (RIP Gordon Hayward) these cats have a real chance to dethrone King James as the Tyrant of the East. Boston looks like they won that trade because, as much as I love Isiah, he ain’t the cure all for what ails the Cavs, man.
Also, Derek Rose is out with yet another knee injury.
Kid’s the new Brandon Roy. Unfortunate…
The Lakers are surprisingly fun to watch.
And they’re winning. I don’t expect them to sneak into the playoffs without an actually star, their core is WAY too young to compete with anyone, but they have shown signs. Ball’s court vision would make any team envious and Randle is a legit force in the paint. Plus, we got all of the cash. All of it. Next offseason should be interesting wooing actual, legitimate, talent to Lalaland. While I’d hope to snatch PG and/or Marc Gasol and another star talent, we’ll probably end up with LeBron or some sh*t. Whoo.
Boy, the Kings gon’ Kings.
They missed out in a trade for Andre Drummond last year in favor of snatching Buddy Heild. Like, Divac had that sh*t done. All that was needed was ink to paper and the Kings would have one of the post players in the league right now. Instead, Viveck vetoed that sh*t because he saw Buddy as the next Curry. Buddy disagreed. Hours after the trade, he literally said his game is nothing like Steph’s game. And, surprise-surprise, the Kings suck this season. But guess who is second out East? Yessir, Detroit. Behind that brilliant play of Avery Bradley and solid anchor action of Drummond, the Pistons have surprised all year. The Kings, not so much. Can you imagine Drummond in Jaeger’s system, playing alongside Collie-Stein or that other trash big they have Scary! What could have been…
Giannis is a goddamn monster!
His time is mediocre but Giannis is a f*cking unicorn. The Bucks better figure out how to keep kid happy because with ability like that, he can write his own story in the NBA.
Kristaps is a Goddamn monster, too!
After severing ties with The Zen Master and Melo, Porzingas has thrived. He looks like he belongs on the court, that he IS a franchise guy.
I like how everyone is surprised that OKC experiment isn’t panning out like they thought.
I called that nonsense the second Anthony waived his No-Trade clause. Everyone wants to say Russ out here balling and that he deserves his MVP and that’s cool or whatever but did they win? Did he take a bad team and elevate them into contention? Did he will his lackluster squad into the West Finals against a stacked Warriors team? No. Russ lost to the guy who he beat out in MVP votes, James Harden. Last season’s MVP WAS Harden. But because he ain’t average a triple-double, he didn’t get the nod. His team beat Russ, and i say run becuase that’s all they were; The OKC Russel Westbrooks. Consistently. His team beat Russ in the Playoffs. Convincingly. His team made it to the Western Conference Finals. The only reason Russ put up the numbers he did was because he was the only viable option on offense. Harden took his guys and made them better while average a near trip-dub all season. Harden should have got that crown last season but politics dictated otherwise. It’s funny to me how The Beard has maintained his numbers and his team is actually doing much better than last year, but Russ is tanking, That’s what happens when you put two ball-dominate guys on the court together, especially when one is coming off winning the most prestigious award outside of an actual chip, for being a ball hog.
On the plus, Paul George is all but guaranteed to be in Laker gold next season because of this nonsense.
Come on home, PG. We love you out here i SoCal!
Ayesha Curry bad as well, manq.
That really doesn’t have anything to do with the current state of the NBA but I saw her picture pop up as I was doing research and, goddamn, Ayesha Curry bad a hell, manq!
The Sixers look legit.
My cousin got drafted to their G-League team, the 87ers (?) so I have a vested interest in their success all of a sudden. It sucks that Simmons is out with an ankle injury but Embiid looks like the truth. They ain’t ready yet, the Cavs proved that last night, But they’re close. The League post-Bron should be mighty interesting. Between the promising kids out in the city of Brotherly love, Those surprising Knickerbocker with that Unicorn of Porzingas as the franchise, All that potential down in Lalaland, and the Greek Freak’s little tribe in Brew City, we good for another decade as far as quality hoop is concerned.
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smokeybrand · 7 years
Text
NBA Rant: Inmates Running The Asylum
-So i wrote this yesterday but couldn’t post it. Apparently, Tumblr wouldn’t let me log in. So, i’m posting it today. I know there was a lot of sh*t that happened last night but i’ll get to it in the next rant.-
Whoo, boy, this post-Paul Clippers tenure has been a goddamn roller coaster!
We are 19 games into the season and, goddamn, what the hell is going on in Lesser-LA? You lose Paul. Get shafted in that trade for a bunch of sub-par and injury prone role players. Give Griffin a 173 mil contract on the hopes he’ll actually see the court for the duration and then he goes blows out his knee. Your Coach/GM favors the f*ck out of his mediocre son so you constantly miss out of beneficial trades because he refuses to move his kid, which breeds animosity in the locker room. You have absolutely no offensive talent on the floor outside of the injured Griffin. AND you’re next best asset, Jordan, is on the way out. Cats have actively been shopping him around, too! The Clippers are a f*cking mess. You’d  think Junior Buss was running that team. While i’m on that topic...
Should the Clips fire Doc?
It’s been, what? Half a decade and the closest they’ve gotten to a title was the second round? Seriously, the Clips have never been contenders, as much as analyst want you to believe otherwise. Now that they’ve lost Paul in a terrible trade facilitated by Doc, Lost Griffin to injury for the foreseeable future, and have had rumblings of nepotism f*cking up that locker room chemistry, methinks it’s about time for a change. There are some interesting candidates available. Speaking of…
The Grizzlies have fired their coach in an attempt to placate a disgruntled Marc Gasol because that’s how you assure a talent like that, with uncertainty.
Dude’s in a contact year and you’ve installed an interim coach, after firing the coach he actually like, the season before last. Dave Jeager is a goddamn savant at basketball and you send him away in favor of Fizdale? Really? Okay, buddy. On top of all of this, you still might trade Gasol? Why even fire Fizdale then? That doesn’t make a lick of sense!! I had the Grizz in the Playoffs with the lack of competition out West but this is shenanigans. They might as well tear it down and start from scratch. Like the Clippers.
Cats are kind of overreacting to the Cavs right now.
Whether we want to believe they’ve lost it or not, they are still the clear favorites out East. There are no teams that, in a playoff environment, can beat the Cavs in a seven game playoff series. No teams except for the Celtics. The C’s are a force right now and it’s scary. They’ve played brilliant hoop and rattled off an pretty substantial win streak. It’s early, of course, but barring another catastrophic injury (RIP Gordon Hayward) these cats have a real chance to dethrone King James as the Tyrant of the East. Boston looks like they won that trade because, as much as I love Isiah, he ain’t the cure all for what ails the Cavs, man.
Also, Derek Rose is out with yet another knee injury.
Kid’s the new Brandon Roy. Unfortunate…
The Lakers are surprisingly fun to watch.
And they’re winning. I don’t expect them to sneak into the playoffs without an actually star, their core is WAY too young to compete with anyone, but they have shown signs. Ball’s court vision would make any team envious and Randle is a legit force in the paint. Plus, we got all of the cash. All of it. Next offseason should be interesting wooing actual, legitimate, talent to Lalaland. While I’d hope to snatch PG and/or Marc Gasol and another star talent, we’ll probably end up with LeBron or some sh*t. Whoo.
 Boy, the Kings gon’ Kings.
They missed out in a trade for Andre Drummond last year in favor of snatching Buddy Heild. Like, Divac had that sh*t done. All that was needed was ink to paper and the Kings would have one of the post players in the league right now. Instead, Viveck vetoed that sh*t because he saw Buddy as the next Curry. Buddy disagreed. Hours after the trade, he literally said his game is nothing like Steph’s game. And, surprise-surprise, the Kings suck this season. But guess who is second out East? Yessir, Detroit. Behind that brilliant play of Avery Bradley and solid anchor action of Drummond, the Pistons have surprised all year. The Kings, not so much. Can you imagine Drummond in Jaeger’s system, playing alongside Collie-Stein or that other trash big they have Scary! What could have been…
 Giannis is a goddamn monster!
His time is mediocre but Giannis is a f*cking unicorn. The Bucks better figure out how to keep kid happy because with ability like that, he can write his own story in the NBA.
 Kristaps is a Goddamn monster, too!
After severing ties with The Zen Master and Melo, Porzingas has thrived. He looks like he belongs on the court, that he IS a franchise guy.
 I like how everyone is surprised that OKC experiment isn’t panning out like they thought.
I called that nonsense the second Anthony waived his No-Trade clause. Everyone wants to say Russ out here balling and that he deserves his MVP and that’s cool or whatever but did they win? Did he take a bad team and elevate them into contention? Did he will his lackluster squad into the West Finals against a stacked Warriors team? No. Russ lost to the guy who he beat out in MVP votes, James Harden. Last season’s MVP WAS Harden. But because he ain’t average a triple-double, he didn’t get the nod. His team beat Russ, and i say run becuase that’s all they were; The OKC Russel Westbrooks. Consistently. His team beat Russ in the Playoffs. Convincingly. His team made it to the Western Conference Finals. The only reason Russ put up the numbers he did was because he was the only viable option on offense. Harden took his guys and made them better while average a near trip-dub all season. Harden should have got that crown last season but politics dictated otherwise. It’s funny to me how The Beard has maintained his numbers and his team is actually doing much better than last year, but Russ is tanking, That’s what happens when you put two ball-dominate guys on the court together, especially when one is coming off winning the most prestigious award outside of an actual chip, for being a ball hog.
 On the plus, Paul George is all but guaranteed to be in Laker gold next season because of this nonsense.
Come on home, PG. We love you out here i SoCal!
 Ayesha Curry bad as well, manq.
That really doesn’t have anything to do with the current state of the NBA but I saw her picture pop up as I was doing research and, goddamn, Ayesha Curry bad a hell, manq!
 The Sixers look legit.
My cousin got drafted to their G-League team, the 87ers (?) so I have a vested interest in their success all of a sudden. It sucks that Simmons is out with an ankle injury but Embiid looks like the truth. They ain’t ready yet, the Cavs proved that last night, But they’re close. The League post-Bron should be mighty interesting. Between the promising kids out in the city of Brotherly love, Those surprising Knickerbocker with that Unicorn of Porzingas as the franchise, All that potential down in Lalaland, and the Greek Freak’s little tribe in Brew City, we good for another decade as far as quality hoop is concerned.
0 notes