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#brojake
strangedetectivepenis · 5 months
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brojake brojake brojake brojake
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wow this sucks i wish gay people blew up
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brojaked · 6 months
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INTRO!
hiiii i'm jay. i like brojake. it's the only proship i like lol.
this blog is only for brojake ^_^
that's it. lol
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shhisp · 10 months
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Writing Cute Girlfriend again making my brain hurt (affectionate)
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okay so this PROBABLY exists already butttttttt
Toxic Homestuck Ships Tournament
You like homestuck? You like toxic ships? Wow, I wonder what the most popular ship that ticks both those boxes. That's this. That's what this is.
Some rules:
Don't be a dick. I'll push you down the stairs.
Only two ships per two characters. Ex BroGrandpa, BroJake, DirkJake. Only two of those will be allowed. If there are more than two, there will be a poll to decide what ones. Lil Hal and sprites will be counted as their own people. (this mayyy or may not be to prevent having it being just stridercest)
And yeah, incest is allowed. Incest, age gaps, selfcest, whatever. This is homestuck. Any ship is allowed as long as they have a good claim to being toxic.
Rairpairs are allowed too!! They never talk in canon but you just KNOW they'd be bad for each other? yeah!!!
No Hiveswap or HS^2. No crossovers.
I'm going to say I'm closing submissions October 6th, but that could change if there are very few or a lot of submissions. (how many toxic ships can homestuck have? a lot, probably)
Toxic Homosuck Bracket (google.com)
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dirkdave-yaoi · 2 months
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this is my intro post
my name is dirk.
i’m profic.
l like stridercest, alphacest, brojohn, brojake, and dirkjake but make it underage.
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alterniastims · 6 months
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brojake perhaps?
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ee they're so cute
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agatanogowska · 7 years
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photographer: Bogdan Jabłoński
model: Justyna Michalska
hair: Magdalena Brojak
makeup: Julia Motylińska
stylist: Agata Nogowska
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brojaked · 4 months
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more brojake art neowwww :////
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My jake cosplay from the recent geek meet. Set 1.
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Sushi Confessions
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timaeusTestified [DIRK] joined chat.
GT: Hello dirk!
GT: Why I do believe it’s been quite some time since we’ve last conversed!
DIRK: Heh, hey Dude.
GT: How’ve you been?
DIRK: I guess so and uh, i’ve been pretty good actually. Getting alot more robot junk done.
DIRK: How about you though? How’s your life?
GT: That’s great, i’ve been quite hunky dory, really. Missing you, ol’ chap!
DIRK: Great! So uh, what do you wanna do?
DIRK: I mean we are just hanging for now.
GT: Erm, well. Do you have anything in mind? I’m down in the ground and all about whatever.
DIRK: Eh, not really. I was kinda hoping you had something to do.
GT: We could go out and get food? There’s a plethora of cuisines i’m dying to try.
DIRK: *You gave a soft smile and nodded* Sure why not, my treat.
GT: -Smiles wildly and perks up- Gun ho! i’m so ecstatic!! You really mean it dirk?!
DIRK: Mhmm. *You set your hand on his shoulder and smiled at how happy he was* I have about 3 hundred burning a hole in my pocket.
GT: -Jake hugs Dirk tightly- Can we get, uh Sushi is it? I’ve heard grand things friend. I used to try to make it on the island but oh gee, it would be great to taste it how it’s supposed to be made!! -Jake pronounced it terribly wrong-
DIRK: *You squeaked a little bit as he hugged you, rubbing your hands on his back and sighing lightly* You mean Sushi? Heh, well yeah sure why not. It’s good if you’re into raw fish I guess. I really don’t like it, but hell i’ll get it for you.
GT: Oh, pish posh how could you not like sushi, dirk? Aren’t you ‘soooo anime?’ -Jake giggled a bit-
DIRK: *You shook your head and smiled a little* that’s the only food from Japan I don’t like. I just really don’t like the smell of fish. And that is part of the reason I like men instead of women.
GT: Ohhh, okey doke. What about the ones without fish in it, I do believe california roll doesn’t, or does it? Whatever you will eat some still, won’t you?
DIRK: True, it has crab or lobster which I really don’t mind. Alright, sushi it is!
GT: Yay!
GT: ——time skip, pchooooooooo———
DIRK: *You two were sitting at the sushi place with your food and you couldn’t help but keep looking at him. Geeze he was adorable..but he left you a while ago, jsut get over it dirk.*
GT: I really do think I’m starting to get a hang of these chopsticks dirk! Watch!!! -Jake picks up an california roll with the chopsticks, using the one hand as he taught himself slowly lifting it up to his lips and taking a bite. Jake swallowed and smiled widely.- Booyah!!! -Jake looked up at a Dirk and smiled-
GT: Hey Dirk.
DIRK: *You grinned and just picked yours up with your fingers, not wanting to show Jake up with your chopstick skills* There ya go. Now just do it a few hundred more times and it’s perfect. *You chuckled a bit, eating a few california rolls, your plate was full of them. Fuck he was such a cutie..*
GT: -Jake chuckled and picked one off of Dirk’s plate and leaned over toward Dirk.- “Say ahhhh” -Jake held the sushi near his mouth smiling-
DIRK: *You couldn’t help but laugh, opening your mouth and rolling your eyes* ahhh..ehe..
GT: -Jake accidentally dropped the piece of sushi back onto the plate looking down at it and cursing- Oh, shoot. Sorry Dirk.
DIRK: *You smiled and waved him off* pffft, dude it’s fine. *You picked up your chop sticks, twirling them and picking up the sushi, eating it* mhmm..
GT: -Jake gaped at Dirk and his weird talent with chopsticks- Why golly gee fuck, dirk! How’d you get so darn good with chop sticks? Oh wait super sugoy anime boy, yes? -Jake laughs and looks down at the sushi-
DIRK: Oh geeze, do you even know what sugoy means, jake? I mean, you make my kokoro go doki doki but..yeah. *You smiled, praying that he didn’t know what that meant.*
GT: -Jake cocked his head to the side and smiled innocently- Uh, right-o, Dirk. I have no clue as to what any of that means, friend! But uh yes, doki doki to you too! -Jake smiles at Dirk and eats another piece of sushi-
DIRK: *You smiled and sighed on the inside. If he only knew what it meant, you know he wouldn’t say it back. Oh well, lets not get sad now.* Ehe..yeah. *You reach down and throw another piece in your mouth using the chopsticks.* Ya know, it’s nice hanging out with you again.
GT: -Jake looks up at Dirk- I’m so happy we could be this good again, I do say an evening with you is always a most invigorating one, Strider. But do tell me, what does all those japanese phrases I catch you saying translate to, anyhow?
DIRK: *His words tugged a string in your heart, making your chest ache* heh yeah..and uh, well sugoi means cool and all that and kokoro means..well it means heart and doki is the sound it makes. *You shrugged a little bit and sighed*
GT: -Jake bites his bottom lip in thought-
DIRK: *You just started to stuff your face with sushi, feeling to broken and awkward to talk*
GT: That’s quite cute, actually! -Jake smiles reassuringly-
DIRK: *You smiled a little, feeling like a douche* heh..yeah.
GT: Dirk, can I ask ya something a tad blunt?
DIRK: Mhmm, sure shoot. *You shrugged a bit and slid down your shades, looking him in the eye*
GT: -Jake felt a little nervous when Dirk did so getting a bit lost in his eyes, losing his train of thought for a moment- I, I uh -ahem- Are you s-still infatuated with me by any chance, Dirk?
GT: -Jake took a bite of sushi-
DIRK: *Your gaze kept on him, shrugging slightly and thought for a second* Well, yeah kinda. I know you really don’t like me anymore, but hell I can honestly say you’re the best thing to ever happen to me.
GT: -Jake blushed and nodded, looking down to the right.- Hey, Dirk if you’ve got such a knack with the chopsticks, I’d like to see you try and feed me with them. What do ya say?
DIRK: *You smiled a bit, picking up your chopsticks and picking up a piece off his plate, getting it close to his mouth* alrighty, open up. *You tapped his lower jaw to get him to open it.*
GT: -Jake pushed the chopsticks to the side and cupped Dirk’s chin, leaning forward and pressing his lips against Dirks-
DIRK: *your eyes widened and your face turned a dark shade of red as your lips pressed against his, pretty much sinking into it* ..hmm..
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DIRK: *You could feel your heart starting to race horribly as you got a little nervous, which almost never happens*
GT: -Jake pulls back from the kiss and frowns a tear rolling down his cheek- I am so sorry, dirk
DIRK: *You quickly reach and wipe away his tears, kissing his cheek* ..please don’t cry. *You sighed lightly and took your shades off, even though the lights were hurting them as you folded them on your shirt* ..don’t be..I was an asshole okay?
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GT: -Jake shakes his head wiping away his own foolish tears- no, no no. i just think, maybe we both kinda rushed into things, yeah? Neither of us were really ready for a relationship and i just gosh darnit, i never stopped thinking about you, dirk.
GT: and i couldn’t figure out why, until now.
DIRK: *You felt your heart start to ache as you nodded along with his words before hugging him tightly* …you’re always on my mind and I..Well I miss you something terrible. You were my world and I need you back. *You gave a weak smile even though he couldn’t see it*
DIRK: ..why’s that, hun?..
GT: -jake hugged dirk back laughing into his neck and then talked into his ear- i-i don’t know, look, can we just get out of here and snuggle up on your futon watching my little pony?
DIRK: *You nodded and kissed his neck lightly* yes..yes yes yes we can dude. Fuck you’re perfect. *You let him go, eating a little bit more food and leaving the money on the table.* let’s go..
GT: —-time skip pchooooooooo—-
DIRK: *By the time you two get home, your heart was still racing and you felt like you were finally complete. You both plopped down on your futon and you had flipped on one of your favorite episodes of MLP. The one where Twilight Sparkle becomes a princess.*
GT: -Jake moves to lay down behind dirk patting a spot in front of him for dirk to lay down with him-
DIRK: *You smiled a little and laid down with him, putting Jakes hand around your middle stomach as you two always used to* hmm..
GT: -jake whispered into dirk’s ear- Bejesus, I’ve missed your touch awfully so.
DIRK: *You smiled still but even wider.* hmm..I think I understand. *You chuckled and rested your back against his chest*
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GT: -Jake kissed Dirk’s neck and held Dirk tight against himself- Do you, now?
DIRK: *You smirked a tad and nodded* mhmm..ehe. *You intertwined your fingers with his lightly*
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GT: God, I’ve even missed this show playing in the background. -Jake laughs-
DIRK: *you laughed lightly and nodded* yeah..it’s lonely watching it without someone. *you sighed, nuzzling against him lightly*
GT: Good fucking gravy i missed you so much it hurts, dirk. -jake starts to suck on dirk’s neck lightly, lovingly-
DIRK: *at first you smiled and chuckled a bit, but it quickly turned into a soft whine* J-Jake..ah shit you remember how hmm..sensitive my neck is..
GT: L-let me rediscover, yes? -Jake sucks down harder, grazing it with his teeth-
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DIRK: *You gripped his hand, moaning lightly and biting your lip* hm..s-shit if you want, go right ahead mhmm..
GT: g-god i’ve missed those sounds -jake licks the shell of dirks ear, nipping down the lobe getting a bit hard-
DIRK: *Your hips shift a little, accidentally grinding against him as you whine a little more* a-ah..god i’ve missed your kisses..and bites..and licks and everything, fuck..
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GT: ((test))
GT: -Jake lets out a rugged moan due to the friction- f-ffuck, dirk -jake said huskily into dirk’s ear-
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DIRK: *You gulped and bit your lip, feeling yourself getting a little hard just from his moans and the little bit he was doing on you neck* hmm..you like that eh? ehe.. *You pressed your plush ass back against him, grinding it*
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GT: (())
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GT: -Jake let out a long low moan and pulled his hand away pinching dirk’s ass- you little tease -jake bit his lip-
DIRK: *You squeaked a little from the pinching, pushing back again because fuck those moans were hot* hmm..aww come on, you love it.. *You grabbed his hand that pinched your ass and pushed it down on your ass, so he was grabbing it. That drew a small moan out of you* a-ah…oh Jake..
GT: -jakes hand clenched onto his ass and he moaned into dirk’s ear- unnnngh dirk you know i adore when my name escapes those lips -jake moves his other hand down to dirk’s crotch-
DIRK: *You grunted slightly as his hand gripped your ass, fuck you loved it. Soft whines and moans slipped out as he lightly touched your crotch, you bucked your hips into it* ehe..o-oh Jake..*You teased.* ..I haven’t done anything in so long..
DIRK: ((yooo be right back I gotta eat
GT: ((kk
DIRK: ((back
GT: ((dayumn
GT: -Jake palmed dirks crotch slowly, teasingly, keeping his mouth preoccupied by sucking on the back of Dirk’s neck-
DIRK: *Your jaw dropped as you felt him on your crotch. Fuck did it feel good. Slowly you whined and moaned out in pleasure, every so often grinding your ass against him* ..f-fuck i’m getting hard..
GT: -jake brings his other hand over and bites down onto the side of dirk’s neck unzipping dirks jeans-
DIRK: *You squealed lovingly as he bit your neck, your ass grinding back and you felt how hard he had gotten* hmm..ah..Jake please, make me your bitch..take me.
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GT: wheres the lube, i know you’ve got it handy round here somewhere?
DIRK: ehe..in the cushion of the futon. I’ll get it. *You reached back and behind jake, giving his ass a loving squeeze before you grabbed the bottle and brought it back up*
GT: ((brb
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GT: -Jake grabbed dirk’s ass while he was bent over retrieving the bottle
DIRK: *You squeaked a little and looked back, facing him* you little shit..ehe.. *You lovingly pressed your lips against his, whining into them*
GT: -jake kissed back, hard-
DIRK: *You bit his bottom lip, tugging at it as you pulled back* mhmm
GT: i’ve missed you so fucking much
DIRK: I know..I know i’ve missed you too. *You smiled as you slipped off your shades, tossing them on the floor*
GT: -jake took off his glasses neatly putting them on a nearby table-
DIRK: *before he was done putting his glasses down, you grinded your ass lovingly against him, whining his name as you did* ..j-jake..
GT: -jake moaned out loudly- f-fuck dirk, you’re so hot
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DIRK: *you chuckled and smirked* hmm..I know..ehe, but you’re even more sexy..
DIRK: that beautiful accent..hmm It gets me so hot..
GT: im going to ravage you until walking seems sickly, love
DIRK: *you bit your lip as you felt your cock throb from his words* ..p-please..oh god please just fuck me..
GT: -jake starts to unbuckle his pants pulling them down-
DIRK: *You did the same, completely slipping yours off along with your boxers, shoes and socks* hmm..i’ve been waiting months..so many months..
GT: -Jake puts his hand over dirks ass, cupping it-
DIRK: *You bit your lip as he touched your bare ass* hmm..baby please…pound me senseless..I don’t want to be able to walk.
GT: prepare yourself dirk, i want to watch
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DIRK: *You nodded, propping your foot up on your other knee and popping open the bottle of lube, pouring a little bit on two fingers.* hmm..ehe. *You gulped as you brought your fingers down, pressing them against your hole and pushing them in, gasping lightly* a-ah..jake.
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GT: fffuck, dirk -jake snatches the lube rubbing some onto his dick letting out low moans- unggf
DIRK: *You pressed both fingers deeper, loving the feeling* hm..please I can’t wait..ah I wan’t you to take me already..
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GT: fuck, dirk come here
DIRK: *You pushed your fingers a little deeper, brushing your prostate as your jaw dropped* A-AH..o-okay.. *slowly you pulled your fingers out and wiped them on your floor, backing up a little to line him up atleast a bit*
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GT: -jake grabs dirks hips and pushes him against the couch sliding in-
GT: fffffrick
DIRK: *Your jaw drops as you’re penetrated by anyone but yourself for the first time in so long* A-AH..I fogot how hmm..big it is Jake..
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DIRK: mhmm..please, jake.. *You pushed back against him getting it deeper as you moaned his name* A-AH..jmmhn jake..
GT: fffff -jake started to rock his hips picking up his pace- fffuck dirk, you feel so good
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DIRK: *You bit your lip and groaned deeply as you pushed back again, wanting it even deeper as you moaned out his name* mhmm J-JAKE oh god..please fuck..me more..
GT: -jake started slamming into dirk feeling the pressure building up-
DIRK: *You were going to say something, but it was long lost in the hot breaths that escaped you. Right now you felt heat pooling in your loser stomach as he pounded his cock into you, making you drool slightly* mmmnahAH..ah..ah..bmhmm..
GT: dirk, ungf i-im close -jake started to speed up slightly-
DIRK: *Your eyes shut tightly as he hit your prostate, your vision going blurry even behind your eyelids* mmah.. jake-jjake fill me..oh god please fucking fill me. *You felt the heat growing stronger and stronger as a twinge of pleasure shoots down your cock a-ah..
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GT: ffffrick dirk -jake thrusted a few more times before coming and moaning out-
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DIRK: *You tightened greatly around him as strings of hot, white cum spurted out of the head of your cock, coating the futon and your shades below.* A-AHH..J-JAke oh my fucking..mhmm..
GT: -jake slides out and plops onto the couch next to dirk- bejesus, ive missed that
DIRK: *you bit your lip as you slowly road out your orgasm before you flipped over now facing jake* baby..ehe..
GT: -jake pulls dirk into a sloppy loving kiss-
DIRK: *You kissed him back lovingly, your lips pressing harshly against his as you muttered* I love you..
GT: -jake smiled and mumbled back- i love you too
DIRK: *you smiled and laid against him, nuzzling him* so are we..back together?
GT: -Jake wrapped his arms around Dirk- If you’ll have me back
DIRK: *You smiled widely and hugged him as tight as you could, giving him little loving kisses* yes yes yes all kinds of yes
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DIRK: ((hey I gotta go
GT: ((aighht
DIRK: ((night!
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strangedetectivepenis · 5 months
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hey hey we should make some weird and concerning as fuck porn of jake n bro and jake is small. yeah i produce some good ass posts
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shhisp · 1 year
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Brojake is like the best ship in Homestuck and by far the best splintering of Dirkjake I'm dead serious. I think about them and short fucking circuit
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2x2verse · 9 years
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BroJohn or BroJake - Things you said that I wish you hadnt im so sorry if its annoying that im requesting all of these but I adore how you write Bro
[this is actually part of a larger work that i want to get out there, sort of]
“I’m afraid I’m rather new in town,” you admit over the noise of the bar. The dregs of your last bitter are getting warm at the bottom of the glass.
“Oh, now, I wish you woudn’t’ve said that.” At the same time as Bro takes another sip of his rum and Coke, he runs his hand up from where he casually put it at your knee, dragging his nails along the sensitive insides of your thighs before he hits your shorts. “Now I just wanna show you all the good breakfast places around here.”
“Ah.” You can feel the tips of your ears go hot. “So, shall I meet you then?”
“Or you could always stay with me for the night.” And he says it so casually, too. “Wouldn’t have to find a restaurant in an unfamiliar city. Just easier if you came back to my place, really.”
This is going so much better than you thought it would. “If you insist,” you tell him graciously, but with a smirk and a good waggle of the old eyebrows. “I’m never one to turn down a gentleman’s offer.”
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vaguelygeiszlerian · 9 years
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why do i ship such terrible trash crack ships that have next to no fics for them?
anyone pls rp these ships with me (hell just write me a good ol fic with them)
dirkhal, brojohn or brojake
pls save me
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nonpanary · 9 years
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*sigh* I kinda feel like reading a brojake fic where everyone alive (all or most of the beta kids and Jake) are sent back to present-day Earth. Jake's shattered bc he lost his friends, and the beta's are trying to take him in their group and cheer him up, but he feels like he needs closure, so he goes and visits Jane's grave, then Roxy/Mom (who's too drunk to comprehend what's happening), then Bro/Dirk but Jake breaks down entirely upon meeting him and leaves. Anyway, Bro/Dirk finds himself really attached to the guy for some "UNKNOWN" reason, and then angst + fluff ensue.
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