#but fr the benefits of knowing four languages

[juyeonszn]

CYBER SEX

PAIRING eric sohn x f!reader x kim sunwoo

WORD COUNT 3.11k

GENRES smut yktv

WARNINGS 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT, mature language, this is Literally Porn With Plot, gamer!eric, gamer!sunwoo, i’m so sorry but sunwoo is a bitchless loser incel until he’s not a bitchless loser incel, eric has Game literally and figuratively, jealous sunwoo 🤭, exhibitionism, voyeurism, phone/video call sex?, vaginal fingering, male masturbation, unprotected sex, going at it on eric’s gamer chair 💪 , a good amount of praise, degradation (the words dumb and slut) 🫨, soft dom!eric, mean? dom!sunwoo, sunwoo is a little mean at one point but i’m not apologizing 😁👍, pet name princess is used, creampie 🥸, sunwoo is an idiot, lmk if i missed anything!

SUMMARY eric is determined to show his best friend the benefits of having a girlfriend.

MORE hey… LMFOAOOO so i ended up finishing this in like… a day… 😭 what can i say ?1?1!1? when i have an idea, i Must stick with it <3 ANYWAY i got the inspiration for this after watching eric’s wv live on 09/25/23 and thus it has consumed my every waking thought since then ajejfwjdnen also shout out to reese to feeding my delusions and another shout out to doja cat for having the most out of pocket songs and titles bc she came in clutch fr 🤞 pls reblog if u enjoyed! i’m exhausted! (also this is not beta’d bc everyone was asleep and i also had to go to sleep so if there are any errors pls lmk)

PERM TAGLIST @winterchimez @maessseongs @itsbeeble

“Eric.”

Silence. You hear nothing but the sound of his keyboard clacking and his mouse clicking under his fingers from where he sits at his desk. You exhale through your nose, rolling your eyes.

“Eric Sohn.”

Again, you’re given nothing to work with. He curses under his breath, something about him being outnumbered and needing a cover. You don’t even know what game he’s playing, just that he’s been playing it for over an hour. You’re starting to get annoyed.

What kind of boyfriend tells his girlfriend to come over and then plays his stupid online game instead of talking to her?

When you get out of a long day of work, you just want to relax. You don’t want to lay on your boyfriend’s bed all by yourself, forced to watch him play a game you didn’t care for, much less understand. You burn holes into the back of his head when he starts swearing at the screen, hovering over his chair and leaning closer to the PC.

“Youngjae!”

That finally catches his attention, pushing one side of his headset off so he can hear better. He keeps his eyes on the screen but turns his head towards you, humming in response. “What’s up, baby?”

“Is your girlfriend there?”

“Yeah dude, shut up.”

You recognize the other voice as belonging to his best friend, Kim Sunwoo. Your lips form a pout and you flop backward on his bed. “I’m bored. And I wanna cuddle.”

“After this round, I promise.” He smiles at you, returning his focus to the match he was in. His fingers move quickly on the same four backlit keys, tongue poking the inside of his cheek in concentration. From your perspective, it just looked like his character was running aimlessly. (Apparently he had an agenda.)

“Bruh, you said we were gonna play until we won one.” Sunwoo complains. Your mouth forms a scowl. No wonder the guy was still bitchless. He had no concept of how girlfriends were maintained.

“I’m gonna kick your ass.” Your boyfriend says into the mic, tone monotone and no mirth behind the words. You know he wasn’t trying to be intimidating, but it kind of turns you on to see him so focused, his jaw slightly tensed and his bottom lip now between his teeth.

It had been about a week since you last did anything sexual, and you think that paired with your mind numbing work day was the cause for your sudden rush of hormones. You’d think dating a gamer would mean he wasn’t skilled in the sexy department, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. If anything, being so adept with his fingers made him that much better than the average person. Eric’s eyes narrow when he sees a group of players in the distance.

“Dude, back me up. We can take them, we can take them,” he commands, sitting back down at the same time he starts shooting at the other characters. Sunwoo’s comes into view on the other side of the monitor, also firing at the group of maybe four.

With a lazy sigh, you stand from his bed, sitting yourself on the edge of his desk. He offers you a small smile before resuming the intense gameplay he was engaged in. You cross your legs not so subtly due to his appearance, his hair falling into his eyes and his brows knitted together. You wanted him so bad right now. Fucking Kim Sunwoo would pay for being a cockblock.

You nudge his knee with your foot, silently whining in hopes he gets the hint. He holds a finger up to you, leaning into the monitor again. You know what they say; if you want something done, you gotta do it yourself.

You perch yourself on his lap, grinning in sweet victory when his expression falters and he accidentally releases the mouse from his grip. The momentary distraction is enough for his character to get killed, the screen flashing to showcase Sunwoo’s character’s point of view. Eric’s shoulders sag and he gives you a pointed look. You simply bat your eyelashes at him, lips curling into an innocent simper.

“What the fuck, Eric? You said we could take them.”

“My fault,” he apologizes, reclining in his seat and wrapping an arm around your waist as he watches Sunwoo. “You got this, bro.”

Right as he says that, his character also dies, the monitor reading ‘Match Over’ almost instantaneously. He shares an amused snort with you upon jinxing his best friend, one of his hands rubbing up and down your bare thigh. You can hear Sunwoo cussing him out through his headset. Eric winces, unplugging it from the headphone jack so his friend’s grievances weren’t directly in his ears.

“—And it’s all because you can’t keep your dick in your pants, you fucking horndog.”

You snicker at that, slapping a hand over your mouth when you realize that it might’ve been a little too loud. Eric shakes his head at the other male’s irritation. From where he stood, it sounded a whole lot like jealousy rather than anger. The guy really needed to get laid before gaming consumed him entirely and he stayed a loser incel for the rest of his life. Eric was lucky enough to have you in his corner.

“What’s so funny, Y/N?”

“You,” you shrug even if he can’t see it. “I think it’s kinda comical that you’re mad Eric gets pussy. You should take notes, Kim.”

Your boyfriend bursts into uncontrollable laughter, squeezing your thigh gently. You can hear Sunwoo sputter over your words, stumbling and stuttering every time he opens his mouth to speak. You’ve rendered him speechless, because you’re right. He is jealous that Eric has a girlfriend.

If it were any other girl, he doesn’t think he’d give a shit. But it was you. He wasn’t envious of the fact that his best friend was cuffed and he wasn’t. He was envious of the fact that he had you.

Something that doesn’t get brought up a lot, is how Sunwoo actually introduced you to Eric. He knew you first. Naturally, he thought that his tiny crush on you would blossom into something greater, especially because you saw each other twice a week. You were lab partners for Gen Chem and you became friends outside of class pretty quickly. He didn’t think he was terrible looking, and his personality wasn’t that bad either, so he hoped you might’ve been into him too.

And then you met Eric. God, he should’ve known bringing you together was a horrible idea. His best friend was not only extremely handsome, but also quite the flirt and a little too friendly. You were hooked from the get go. Sunwoo really shouldn’t have been that surprised when the two of you started dating.

That didn’t mean it didn’t suck though, having you constantly ask about Eric during your lab and slowly watching you distance yourself the closer you grew to him. It explained why you were so comfortable shitting on his lack of relationship experience, because once upon a time, you were something he could confide in. It was actually sort of hilarious that you were the same reason why he lacked said experience.

Now it’s been over a year and he still doesn’t think he could ever fully get over you.

“Damn, Sunwoo, you really just got your ass handed to you.”

The older of the two males deadpans at his screen, despite knowing neither of you can see him. But now that he’s been backed into a corner, all he can do is save face. “Having a girlfriend is the least of my worries.”

Eric hums, unconvinced. “Maybe I just have to show you what you’re missing out on.”

You turn in his lap, raising an eyebrow. What the hell did he mean by that?

Luckily for you, you don’t have to wonder for much longer. He clicks on his and Sunwoo’s chat in the bottom taskbar, pressing the video call button and allowing it to ring for a few seconds. This gives you the smallest idea of what he has in mind, and deep, deep down, you’re excited by the thought.

Sunwoo answers after the fourth ring, his face appearing in its own window on Eric’s monitor, pouty lips formed in a straight line and headset hidden under his hoodie. He looks sexy like that, in his element. You would never admit that out loud though. He was too attractive for his own good. He didn’t even know what to do with the beauty bestowed on him, resorting to being a gamer who holed himself away in his apartment.

“What am I supposedly missing out on then?” He finally says, and even with the not-so-stellar quality of his video, you recognize that dark look in his eyes. It has you shifting uncomfortably on Eric’s lap, desperate for some friction.

“Well first of all,” your boyfriend starts, brushing your hair behind your shoulder and sneaking a hand under the t-shirt of his you were wearing. “You should cut your losses now. Because no one could ever be better than my precious, Y/N.”

You crane your neck to the side, giving his lips access to your skin. He starts to pepper gentle kisses along the side, making eye contact with you in the smaller window that reflects yourself. Your mouth parts with a sigh when he reaches that sensitive spot just below your ear, and again when he nips at the juncture where it meets your shoulder.

It’s hard to focus on anything but Sunwoo’s expression and the way his jaw clenches upon not being able to touch you himself. And fuck, if Eric wasn’t right. He could never truly find anyone better than you. This was the closest he’d ever get to the real deal.

“You gonna be a good girl for Sunwoo, baby?” Eric murmurs into your ear, nibbling the lobe as his hand travels further up your shirt to palm your bare breast. You merely nod, a small whine escaping your lips when his thumb grazes your peaked nipple.

“Are you seriously about to fuck your girlfriend in front of me?” His best friend asks, voice a bit strained. The concept of you naked in just his head was enough to have him creaming his pants like a goddamn high schooler. But actually getting to see it with his own eyes? Getting to see your face when you orgasm? He doesn’t think he has the mental strength.

“Do you not want me to?” Eric slips his free hand between your legs, pushing your panties to the side. “I can easily end this call and keep this all to myself.”

Your boyfriend takes his silence as an answer, continuing to pleasure you. He helps you pull off the t-shirt, exposing your chest to both him and his best friend. Sunwoo holds his breath, leaning back into his gaming chair with his bottom lip between his teeth. You raise one of your legs, placing your foot on Eric’s knee to give him a clearer view of what’s going on with your lower half.

Eric holds the thin material of your underwear out of the way, languidly thrusting his ring and middle fingers into your hole. You rest your head on his shoulder with a low moan, observing Sunwoo’s different reactions, though he tries to mask them. Even he knows he’s doing a shitty job, because how could any sane person not lose their mind perceiving what he is.

“Need more,” you whimper, tongue darting out to swipe across your lips. “I need more, please…”

“Well, since you asked so kindly,” Eric grins against the side of your head, kissing your temple as he adds a third finger and begins to circle your clit with his thumb. “How could I say no to you, princess?”

The stretch burns slightly, but not too much that it distracts from how good you feel. You half wished your boyfriend suggested this a long time ago. Having someone else’s eyes on you while he fucked you open with his fingers just added more fuel to the fire, rousing the squelching sound your pussy made. The fact that it happened to be Kim Sunwoo just made the experience that much thrilling.

Your heavy eyes glance back to the screen, getting a glimpse of his entranced face. It took everything in him to bite his cheek and keep his mouth shut, longing to extend an arm through his PC and put his own hands all over you. You looked so hot, legs splayed open so he had a perfect view of Eric’s fingers scissoring in and out of your cunt.

“Please, Eric…” You plead. For what? You’re not sure yourself.

“What do you want, baby?”

“Want you to fuck me for real,” you attempt to meet his fingers, telling him all he needs to know.

He grabs your jaw and turns you to face him so he can kiss you, lips moving against yours so softly you might melt in the palms of his hands. You aid him with ridding his pants and his briefs, shoving them down to his ankles so he can kick them off. Your mouth nearly waters, having missed his cock in the past week you’d been apart.

You take a hold of the edge of his desk, eyes rolling to the back of your head when he slips the tip of his dick into the warmth of your cunt. A drawn out whine bubbles up from your throat, risking a look at Sunwoo. He’s still, legs manspread and arms crossed over his chest. By the time Eric’s bottomed out, you’re no longer coherent, brain jumbled.

Your boyfriend begins to move after allowing you to adjust to the fullness of his cock sheathed to the hilt in you. You sit back on him, practically cradling his head as he leisurely fucks you. In spite of him moving without a rush, you can feel all of him, so deep inside of you, you think you could faint.

“You’re— oh god— Eric…” you moan, unable to formulate a comprehensive sentence.

He chuckles lowly, the sound reverberating along your spine. “Don’t forget to include our guest, baby.”

“T-Take off your pants, Sun,” your tone wavers, vision cutting in and out as Eric’s pace increases. “Wanna see you get yourself off…”

Sunwoo groans, covering his face and dragging his hand down to his mouth. He’d barely put his dick inside of you and you already looked so fucked out. He wants to follow through with your wishes, but how can he with your boyfriend right there? Then again, it was Eric’s idea to do this and he did have you spread out in front of him. He needed to act fast, for this was a once in a lifetime opportunity.

He pushes his sweatpants and underwear down mid thigh, freeing his painfully hard cock. He doesn’t have it in him to be embarrassed by the pearl of precum that’s sitting pretty on his slit, using his thumb to smear it around his tip. You mewl, digging your nails in the armrest of Eric’s chair and tugging at his hair.

Your boyfriend’s best friend grabs the base of his dick hesitantly, sighing when it brings momentary relief. He starts to jerk the shaft, twisting his wrist and pumping his hand up and down. He feels so much lighter, like a part of his guilty conscience had just been lifted from his chest. He didn’t have to feel so ashamed of jerking himself off to the thought of you now that he’d been given permission to do so. And in front of you, nonetheless.

“Fucking look at you,” Sunwoo all but growls, fist wrapped tightly around his cock as he bucks up into his hand, head falling back with a groan. “Nothing but talk, aren’t you? Getting off to the loser watching you get fucked like a dumb slut.”

You moan loudly, keeping your hooded eyes on his video. Eric tightens his grip around your hips, holding you in place as he fucks up into you almost brutally, face buried into the crook of your neck. You feel insane, Sunwoo’s degradation inching you closer and closer to your sweet release.

“You’re doing so well, baby,” Eric coos, pressing open mouthed kisses on your neck and shoulders. “Taking me so fucking well, like the good girl you are.”

The contrast between the two males’ approach has your head spinning. On one hand, you had your doting boyfriend and his endless praise. The thought of impressing him always multiplied the butterflies fluttering around in your stomach. You wanted to do anything and everything to keep him satisfied. On the other hand, you had Sunwoo and the string of near insults he kept hurling at you. Something about him calling you demeaning names while still fucking his own fist at the sight of you had those butterflies going rampant.

“I’m— shit— I’m so s-so close,” you babble, reaching down to rub ovular motions into your already sensitive clit.

Sunwoo didn’t think he’d last long from the second he touched himself, so he can’t imagine what will happen when he takes in you orgasming. He bites his lip hard enough to draw blood, tasting the bitter metal-like flavor of the red fluid as his hand speeds up.

“Cum for me, princess,” Eric groans in your ear, fingers sliding down to help you apply more pressure to your clit. “Cum all over my cock for Sunwoo.”

You wail as you hit your climax, toes curling and back arching into your boyfriend’s chest. Your walls squeeze around his dick, triggering his own release. He paints the inside of your cunt with sticky white ropes and a grunt, plugging you up as your breathing regulates and your body stops shaking. You both gaze through the monitor as his cum starts to leak out of you, your pussy filled with so much that you’re surprised he didn’t pass out.

Sunwoo follows after that, coating his hands and thighs in his own ejaculation. He sits there for a minute, eyes closed as he process what the fuck just happened. Once the fogginess of the moment subsided, he feels his heart rate spike. Now that he knows what you look and sound like, how could he ever see you the same?

“Uh, woah that’s crazy, someone’s calling me. Gotta go, bye!” He lies, ending the call before either you or Eric can properly register his words. He reclines in his chair with a pinch of the bridge of his nose.

There was no going back from this.

© juyeonszn. do not steal, claim, or repost.

[lunarimagines]

ATEEZ REACTION TO THEIR BFF HOOKING UP/BEING FWB WITH ANOTHER MEMBER

anon said: Hii, can I please request an ateez reaction to his crush (who's also his best friend) being friends with benefits with another member? Thank uu

warnings: sexual themes, language

A/N: you can now support me on Ko-fi! click [here]

Seonghwa: Seonghwa likes to pretend he's above playing truth or dare, but he's four shots in and sitting in the circle almost giddy as he watches the bottle spin to land on the next person. Wooyoung had just gone, daring San to drink a tablespoon of hot sauce and San was spinning the bottle.

"Y/N!" San yelled, words slurring together ever so slightly. The glazed look in his eyes was enough to know he was truly drunk. "Truth or dare?"

"Truth." Your last dare had been to dunk your sock in the toilet so you stood to loose a lot. Like your other sock.

"Okay, um. Have you ever... hooked up with Seonghwa. Be honest. You two are friends so..."

Seonghwa nearly choked on air. He coughed dryly, eyes going wide as he tried to signal San to shut the fuck up before he told everyone Seonghwa was one smile away from falling in love with you.

"No, we've never hooked up. But Hongjoong and I have when we were friends with benefits." Okay, maybe you were drunk, too.

Hongjoong giggled and Seonghwa felt like he was going to throw up, and the liquor couldn't even be blamed for it.

"But! I like someone else," you whispered, leaning closer to Seonghwa. The image of the two of you have sex, you riding him, replaced the horrific image of you having sex with Hongjoong in his head.

Needless to say your second time having sex with Seonghwa was when he was your boyfriend and you were both sober.

Hongjoong: Hongjoong like to pride himself as the perfect gentleman and someone who knew how to woo the person he liked. He bought little trinkets or treats he found on his way home from schedules in convenience stores or subways stations because he kept finding things that made him think of you. He remembered special events and days, always asking how things went after a presentation at school or a tough day at work. He would have done this simply because he was your best friend, but he also did it because he loved you as something more.

So when Yunho called him, frantic, at 2am one morning to tell him the two of you had hooked up and he maybe sort of probably liked you, Hongjoong felt first happy that you were getting some and then something like terrified and frustrated - terristrated? - that he wasn't the one to give you everything.

"Yunho, call down, my God. It's okay. Did Y/N say anything?"

"No, no. Called a taxi. Work tomorrow or something." Hongjoong knew. He had your schedule memorized after accidentally calling you during a work meeting once. "But I think Y/N likes someone else."

"Oh?" Hongjoong tried, and failed, to sound neutral. Yunho didn't offer more and Hongjoong simply told him to sleep it off and think about it tomorrow after he was rested.

After the phone call from Hell, he texted you.

hongjoongie joong: yunho? woof

you: rude as hell

you: but no, not yunho anymore

hongjoongie joong: you don't have to tell me

you: damn and here i was going to confess to you in the most romantic moment after i fucked your best friend and band mate

hongjoongie joong: you have me blushing and giggling and kicking my feet fr

you: take me out on a date and i'll really have you giggling and blushing and kicking your feet

hongjoongie joong: seriously?

you: yes

you: unless you don't want to

you: but when I was thinking of you the whole time i was with Yunho it was a sign from the universe or whatever

you: i'm off at 5:30

hongjoongie joong: i know. i'll be there to pick you up for our date!

Your first date with Hongjoong was like every other time you went out with your best friend, but this time you could kiss him. He would still be your best friend first but now, he would be your boyfriend second. He also never stopped giving you shit for it taking having sex with Yunho to realize you liked him, forever destined to be "cliché loser" in his phone.

Yunho: Yunho had picked you up from your apartment for your monthly "terrible cooking show remake" where you would try and make the recipe as seen on a cooking show. No rewinding, no saving the recipe, no looking it up. The food was pretty hit or miss, but watching you frustrated, chewing on your lip with furrowed brows was worth eating even the worst recreations.

Currently he was trying to goad you into doing karaoke in the car with him. His favorite pastime was teasing you and trying to get you to roll your eyes at him. God, you were cute.

You were distracted, though, your phone buzzing incessantly in your lap. You had been ignoring it until now.

"Fuckboy is an outdated term now, isn't it?" you asked Yunho, locking your phone after turning off the ringer.

"Yeah it totally is, you old hag," he joked, reaching over to squeeze your arm to show he really was only joking. "Why?"

"I hook up with Wooyoung once, drunk, and he keeps trying to hook up again now that he knows I'm coming over today."

Yunho nearly crashed the damn car. His hand jerked involuntarily before he gripped the steering wheel with white knuckles. He lifted his arm from the center console where it had been resting to grab the wheel with both hands. You may be his best friend but he also desperately loved you.

"Didn't know you were that good at sex," he mumbled, going for joking and sounding much more hurt.

You furrowed your brows at his comment. "Why? You asking for a demonstration?" Part of you was joking but the other part seriously meant it. You may have hooked up with Wooyoung but it was purely sex. With Yunho you felt nervous that any move to show that you liked him as more than a friend would harm your friendship. But you swore that he was... jealous. Jealous that you'd slept with Wooyoung.

Yunho's grip had tightened impossibly more on the steering wheel after your comment. "Don't say things you don't mean."

"I meant it. Mean it."

Your monthly cooking was put off. You also found out just how well Yunho could fuck you. Best friend-turned boyfriend Yunho knew exactly which buttons to push to make you moan.

Yeosang: Yeosang was one step away from buying noise cancelling headphones, and if he had to listen to San's bed frame smack against the wall one more time he was going to use San's credit card to buy the headphones. He wasn't expecting the others to be celibate but he was asking for a little respect.

yeo yeo: guess who is fucking again!!!

you: not you based on the fact that you're texting me!!!

yeo yeo: i'm blocking u :)

you: do it :)

yeo yeo: he can't seriously be that good

you: he's okay

Yeosang shot upright in bed as he read your message. There was no way you, his best friend and the light of his life (and his crush but whatever), had had sex with his friend and bandmate AND HADN'T TOLD HIM.

yeo yeo: you're so fake

yeo yeo: when?

you: few months ago

you: we were fwb for a while but it was nothing to write home about so I didn't tell you

Yeosang called you, paying no mind to the slamming on the wall.

"He's got a good rhythm," was all you said when you picked up.

"Y/N..."

"Yeah it was for about and month and that was all it needed to be. I dunno... It was kinda weird because he's your friend and I didn't have any feelings for him. I'm not sure he and I are even friends so it wasn't truly "friends with benefits". And I learned I don't do casual hookups."

"Oh, so not a waste, then," Yeosang teased. He felt mildly ill at the thought of you having sex with San, his stomach clenching uncomfortably. He tried to push the feeling down knowing he had no right to be upset.

"But," oh, God, why was he still talking, "I could do better."

Your heart jumped to your throat. "I'm not sure why you're not at my place right now."

Yeosang was totally better than San ever was. No offense to San...

Mingi: Mingi had watched for a whole year as you pined after Yeosang. It was hard, especially when Mingi was pretty sure he was in love with you. But he was your best friend, and you were his, so he listened to you whine and complain that Yeosang didn't like you back even when Mingi assured you he did. He had also had the duty of getting the two of you together for a first date.

You and Yeosang had gone on a grand total of three dates before the dates stopped and you and Yeosang just hung out at the dorm or with the others. The pining and crushing had seemed to end, but you never told Mingi why. You just said that it hadn't worked out but that you found you liked Yeosang as a friend. Not a best friend, of course. Nobody could replace Mingi.

Mingi never pried, but he wondered. He wondered when he saw Yeosang and you together, as the two of you laughed, and he wondered when he was overly tired and lacking a filter. Which is probably why he finally asked Yeosang.

"We didn't really have romantic feelings. And we weren't sexually compatible."

Sexually compatible... Mingi probably should have left it at that but he'd texted you instead, despite it being three in the morning. It woke you up.

light of my life: you and yeosang hooked up?

you: it's not hooking up if you were dating at the time right?

light of my life: but it didn't work?

you: obviously not

you: why?

light of my life: why didn't it work?

you: idk mingi probably because your name in my phone is light of my life and i thought about you the entire time

you: goodnight

Not even thirty minutes later the doorbell to your apartment rang incessantly. You pulled yourself out of bed and opened the door to find Mingi, eyes slightly drooping with sleep but otherwise alert.

"You're mad at me?"

"It's not how I wanted to confess, Mingi. Yeosang was helping me plan how to confess to you."

"He knew?" Mingi sounded slightly pained at the idea.

"Yes, Mingi. We went on a few dates but the romance wasn't there. We had sex but were on completely different rhythms. He called it before I did. We're lucky he's our friend, Mingi. He deserves so much."

"We'll send him a thank you card, then."

And then he was kissing you, warm lips pressed against yours and tongue swiping at your lips.

"Can I come in?"

San: San knew what made his friends tick. He knew what foods everyone liked, their favorite colors, he had birthdays written down, and he knew their fears. He knew their partners and he knew their crushes. Except yours, he didn't know who exactly you liked but he took you telling him as a good sign for his own chances with you. He may be your best friend but he also hoped to be your boyfriend eventually.

What he didn't know was that you and Jongho had hooked up once. Jongho wasn't planning on telling anyone but when the boys were teasing him about being a virgin (they knew he wasn't) and San joined in (to be a little shit) Jongho couldn't help but tease San back.

"Ask Y/N. Y/N knows for sure I'm not a virgin."

San stopped immediately as the other boys "ooh"-ed and giggled like prepubescent boys. No way. No fucking way. Did you have a crush on Jongho and that's why you didn't tell him.

The thought stuck in the back of his head, but he couldn't figure out when to bring it up. It's hard to casually say "Hey, Y/N is the reason you haven't told me who you like is because you like Jongho and you're afraid I'll tell him and it's not that you secretly like me and want me to be your boyfriend, right?" Best friend or not, it's a little off-putting to say all of that, bordering on deranged.

But it did come up when the two of you were tipsy and watching reality TV. And it wasn't classy at all.

"Why didn't you tell me you hooked up with Jongho," San practically whined as he draped himself across your lap.

You laughed and carded a hand through his hair. "It didn't mean anything."

"It's because you know I like you."

Your hand nearly stilled, your nails scratching his scalp distractedly as you took in what your best friend and the one you loved most said. You hadn't known he liked you before, instead harboring your own romantic feelings for him to yourself.

"Tell me you like me in the morning and we'll go from there," you replied, turning your attention back to the TV.

Exchanging confessions sober was much more exhilarating. So was the sex that came after.

Wooyoung: Wooyoung often cooks while you prep veggies or sit and watch him and catch him up on all the gossip from your workplace. He never has any idea who any of these people are but he's always enthusiastically listening as you describe the ridiculous email someone sent you or the time your boss let everyone go home early because he was hungover and wanted to go home.

It's a weekly tradition. You've only missed it once when you had a date, which he tried not to feel jealous about. He liked you, as more than a friend, and he always felt the cooking nights were dates in their own right. Your date the one time must not have gone well because you never went on a second or, now that he thinks about it, any other date ever.

The thought occurs to him as you recount the horrifying first date details your coworker had shared with you - including a terrible drunk-induced serenade on the sidewalk - when he blurts it out.

"What happened to that guy you went on a date with that one time? What was his name?"

You clicked your tongue and sighed. "Seonghwa."

"Seonghwa. As in the Seonghwa I know and live with?"

"Do you know another Seonghwa?"

Wooyoung shook his head and put aside the spoon he was stirring the broth with. He lowered the temperature on the stovetop and stared at you, wiggling his eyebrows. "Details please."

"You want me to give you details about... sex with Seonghwa?"

"No way he put out on the first date!" Wooyoung shouted as you shushed him laughing.

"He did! I'm just that hot! It was good sex, but it wasn't what either of us wanted."

Wooyoung tried to catch on to your words but he was trying not to imagine you having sex period because then he would think about he and you having sex and then he would probably pop a boner and damn that would border on embarrassing probably.

"Oh my, God," you totally clocked him, "you're thinking about me having sex right now aren't you!"

Wooyoung didn't blush, but maybe he turned a little pink. "What, my best friend's hot..."

"You've already wined and dined me... just ask me out," you said lowly, not at all teasing.

Wooyoung saw it in your eyes, the way they turned soft and slightly hooded.

"Y/N, will you go out with me? As in a romantic date?"

You and Wooyounng were much more compatible.

Jongho: Twenty questions was for losers according to Jongho. Thank god you and Jongho were losers.

It had started out with you jokingly asking him to play, rattling off three questions before Jongho finally jumped in to make you stop asking him what his credit card number was, what the expiration date on his card was, and if he could tell you the CVV on the back. He made sure to tell you you were a loser for playing, but he asked questions back, too. He would do anything for you as your best friend. Oh, and also because he was in love with you.

"What's your date of birth?" he asked, sighing over the phone loudly.

"You going to ask for my social security number next?" you joked. "Come on! Ask good questions. Ask juicy ones."

You could practically hear Jongho rolling his eyes over the phone. "Who was the last person you kissed?"

"Juicy!"

"You're avoiding the question."

"Mingi."

"What! When?" Jongho yelled.

"It's my turn. Who is the last person you kissed?"

"My mother on the cheek. When?"

"When we may or may not have hooked up last month."

"Oh my, God. You told me you were helping film Mingi's dance practice before you came to see me!" Jongho pushed down the jealousy in his chest. "Are you telling me not to touch the couch in the dance practice room now?"

"Yes and also it's my turn. Are you mad?"

"No." The answer was immediate.

"You sound upset."

"I'm not upset."

"You sound it," you replied softly.

"I'm just a little hurt you didn't tell me. You don't have to tell me everything but you're my best friend and he's also my friend."

"That's the only reason?"

Jongho stayed silent for a whole minute. "No. I like you Y/N. You know that."

"I didn't know. I just hoped you did."

"You can't say that over the phone. I'm taking you on a date tomorrow."

Mingi, when he found out you and Jongho were dating, begged Jongho to get him a gift for getting the two of you together. Jongho offered only a foot up his ass.

Respectfully, of course.

[wherearemyglassesbro]

i saw that you play genshin impact, so i’m kind of curious... what’d be the axis and allies’ vision and weapons?

Uh oh...now you got me started. Be warned, it’s a long one cause I have no self control

Some key terms for those who don’t play genshin impact and want to be included!!

Cryo -> ice, Hydro -> water, Dendro -> nature, Geo -> rock, Pyro -> fire, Electro -> lightning

Hilichurls: a common enemy found in the wild. Despite looking like hairy trolls, they have a district language as well as texts, art and song that they share together making them an advanced species!

Ruin guards: another enemy. Giant, scary robot...they scare me...

Knights of Favonious: an organization of knights within Mondstat that keep order and peace :) very nice guys and gals over there!!

Mondstat: modeled after Germany

Liyue: modeled after China

Alfred: pyro, claymore, Springvale Mondstat

Alfred would be a super heavy hitter in battle but his drawbacks are that despite his energetic nature, he’s slower because of the weight of his weapon

He blows stuff up a lot and sets all of the grass around you on fire so if you fight with him...His teammates will take damage from him Jeez Louise!!!

Since we don’t have all of the nations of Teyvay unlocked, I don’t know where he’d be from! I’d have to explore to get a sense for it so for characters that don’t have a place on the map yet, I’ll mark them with an asterisk from now on! :)

Idk where he lives but I do know that he’d be a devoted member of the adventurers guild! He’s always willing to offer a helping hand to anyone in need! Wether it be helping Granny Ann make hash browns or taking comissions to go kill a huge ruin guard who’s terrorizing the town!! He’s always leaping into new jobs! He isn’t even in it for the money or rewards! He just loves helping out!

Arthur: Dendro, archer, Mondstat

Artie is a beast in battle! Shooting vine Aries at enemies to tie them up or temporarily blind them??? Sick as fuck. Keep in mind, Genshin doesn’t have any Dendro characters that are playable yet so idk how they’d fight but I think I can guess :)

Artie is technically part of the knights of favonious because he works in their library. He translates books written in ancient texts into the standard language so historians and others can read what the old civilizations had to say

Instead of having normal eyes, they’re slit like snake eyes. And he has leaves instead of hair :)

He has a little seelie that floats around at his side. He talks to it but it doesn’t really do anything but provide company to a lonely guy :’) he needs more friends

Matthew: Anemo, catalyst, *

It’s always good to have a catalyst on your team! Ningguang is a great example of an underestimated catalyst cause she can do INSANE damage man!! So I think Mattie would be the same way

Matt isn’t violent and doesn’t enjoy fighting so his in-game voice lines would say that lol

Mattie is an alchemist! Well...A student alchemist. He didn’t take up an interest in alchemy until like, 3 years ago so he’s got a lot to catch up on still! He’s doing his best!

He gets very annoyed with Alfred since Mattie is detail oriented and gentle...Alfred is not any of those things. But he still loves his brother and on rare occasions, he’ll assist him with his commissions

Ivan: Cryo, catalyst, Liyue(temporary)

Ivan would be a support character for sure but he’d do a damn good job of doing it

He’s buff but he doesn’t do hand to hand combat, he’s mastered magic for a reason

Ivan spends most of his time studying hilichurls. He writes books about them, translates their texts and acts as a peace keeper when he can. He gets information from them about the Abyss Order in return for free reign of small portions of protected land where they can live without fear of being killed

Because he’s from Schneznya(spelling?) he’s kinda expected to be a bad guy but he left a long time ago. But he still sounds like he’s from there and...He’s super pale too so there really is no mistaking where he’s from

Ivan can’t stand how ignorant humans are towards hilichurls so he does everything he can to advocate for them. He’s covered in scars from when he first started engaging with the beasts. A huge scar runs down his face but he doesn’t mind it

He’s got big, sharp teeth!! So he doesn’t often smile cause he thinks he looks weird

Francis: Hyrdo, long sword, *

Fran is underestimated when it comes to combat (like Kaeya...I see you slandering this man) but he has so much potential!

Since he’s a hydro, he is so useful for elemental reactions! If he’s paired with a cryo or pyro user, he’d totally boost them!!

Fran is a traveling entertainer, he goes between the 7 nations as a singer and actor for small stage plays. He has a crew of friends who travel with him, they’re one jolly bunch!

He always acts all nonchalant and stuff but once he’s in a battle, he’s wild. Especially if the abyss order holds up his crew on their way to their next tour destination “We need to be in Liyue Harbor in four hours you are NOT holding us back!” *tidal wave*

He’s a regular tavern hopper! A very recognizable face since he’s been banned from a handful for getting too rowdy

He can make not one, but 2 special dishes :0

Yao: Dendro, polearm, Liyue

I just imagine him as a shorter, richer and cooler version of Zhongli

He’d do that kick move that Zhongli does with his polearm oh man that looks SICK dude!!!

Yao would shoot vines out and they’d strangle enemies for a few seconds before disintegrating but if he’s leveled up enough, they’ll totally strangle those stupid hillichurls lol

Yao sells rare gems and other miscellaneous items for very high prices in Liyue where he grew up. His shop is upstairs by the Fatui bank. Rich people enjoy looking at what his shop has to fifer and will argue prices with him. They’re getting scammed for sure. He’ll list a set of cor lapis earrings as $50,000 and the rich will be like ‘I’ll pay $25,000, no more than that’ and he’ll take it!!....Cause thise earrings are worth $5000 at most >:)

Hes close with a lot of the higher ups in Liyue and is often invited to fancy lunches or dinners where they discuss policy, contracts and vendor permits. He doesn’t really get a say in any of that but he benefits from listening

Kiku: Electro, claymore, *

Kiku would be SUCH an awesome electo user are you KIDDING me??? I can see it now, him swinging that huge sword around, purple lightning bolts flying all around and he looks like a total badass? Amazing vibes

When paired with cryos???? He’d do an insane amount of damage fr

Kiku runs a small restaurant where he...runs the place...but doesn’t cook. His restaurant is extremely exclusive and people often throw fits when they can’t get in cause the wait list is over 5 years long. He’ll rest his hand on their shoulder and smile ‘is something wrong? I’d love to take a complaint if you have one’...No one has even dared to complain to his face lol

Behind the restaurant front he deals with the Fatui, buying and selling minerals or artifacts. That’s where his knowledge is at, not with food. He pays his staff to ignore what goes on behind the scenes and the locals are too busy enjoying the restaurant to question what goes on after dark

Gilbert: Pyro, long sword, Mondstat

Gil would be one of the free characters given to you at the beginning of the game but hey, I’m not complaining

He’s highly destructive and very chaotic in battle, he can do that spin move even though that’s meant for claymore users

He’s Mondstat’s biggest trouble maker. He runs an underground gambling room that sits underneath a tavern. He isn’t really into gambling but he makes a lot of money by running it

The only knight who knows is Ludwig which is not good cause...Gil pretty much bribes his brother into not telling the knights of favonious (peace keepers of Mondstat)

Gil never got his gliding certificate cause he kept flying into buildings. He broke his nose doing that lol

Lovino: Pyro, catalyst, *

I can’t add anymore images so imagine a floating, red and black orb. Lovi doesn’t get a book catalyst cause he doesn’t read :) That’s the catalyst thing I’m talking about 😅😅

My guy has the angriest in game voice lines, he’s inconvenienced by every battle, every enemy is ugly and a fuckin disaster. He’s just. Angry.

He’d be a super weak character if he needed to rely on hand to hand combat but he learned magic for a reason babey

He owns a flower stand in his country and makes all kinds of beautiful flower arrangements. He even picks his own flowers in the fields when he can (but usually pays the town’s children to do it for him to ‘teach them the value of hard work’).

Everyone knows he’s a total hothead and will piss him off on purpose just cause it’s funny lmao. But then somehow...Their hair or clothes will just...catch on fire. So is it really worth it to tease him? :/

Feliciano: Hydro, archer, Mondstat(temporary)

I feel like Feli would also be a free character, not cause he isn’t good or anything! But you always need an archer on your team!

Feli has healing properties for his team and doesn’t do an insane amount of damage but when given the right resources, he’d be a pretty sick healer

He moved to Mondstat to join the church there. He leads prayers in front of the church and sings in the choir inside.

He is the sweetest and has never committed a crime in his LIFE but he’s afraid of the knights lol he’s terrified that he’ll get in trouble and be kicked out of Mondstat forever! That would never happen but he’s a worry wart cause of his brother

Ludwig: Geo, long sword, Mondstat

Lud is the only one that I could really think of as a Geo but Geos are awesome :)

He’s a hard hitter but has like...No shield so he’ll take damage fast if you don’t give him those artifacts with shield in them or whatever lol uhhhh I wouldn’t know anything about that cause I suck at building my teams ;-;

He’d totally be in with the knights of favonious! (I think that’s spelled right lol) but he’d take his duty as a knight very seriously!! He’s a familiar face around Mondstat, the elderly absolutely adore him and the local teenage girls swoon over him which he finds super embarrassing lol

He has to work hard to keep Gilbert in check cause even though Gil isn’t a knight, his actions reflect negatively back on Lud very often... :(

Please ignore the spelling errors and terrible photo cropping on my part lol this was so fun!!

By the time you’re seeing this, ive already made full outfit red sheets for everyone mentioned above!!!! :D

[ckret2]

Request Denied, Request Denied

Summary: Red and Purple are the most wildly successful Tallest the Irken Empire has had in ages. This, despite the fact that the Empire is starving, dying, and decaying around them. Series: Invader Zim Word count: 2700 Notes: I discovered that I wrote this eleven years ago and I don’t even remember writing it?? But it only needed like a few paragraphs to have a proper conclusion, so I decided to type it up and wrap up the ending. also u can tell this was written by a 16-year-old who was not quite exactly sure what world leaders do all day but assumed that it probably mainly consisted of a lot of paperwork. (For those of y’all waiting for my long-promised ISS updates—don’t take this as 100% congruent with ISS verse; I picture the ISS version of the Irken Empire to be slightly less crapsacktacular and significantly better at, like, governing itself.)

Under the rule of Almighty Tallest Red and Purple, the Irken Empire was the strongest it had ever been. The sheer size of the empire said enough about their success; and despite the fact that resistance, rebellions, and revolts against the Irkens were higher than they had ever been before, in proportion to the number of citizens under their rule, the relative percentage of the population that was fighting against its Empire had actually decreased. Sullen slaves and unconquered races outside the empire could never really understand what it was about these two particular Tallest that made them, bumbling as they were, so successful. But the answer, really, could be summed up with a simple Earthen expression:

Two heads are better than one.

In fact, the Tallest would only benefit from having quite a few more heads. Not, of course, that they'd get them.

The particular room they were standing before now seemed utterly inconspicuous—it was designed that way. There was no need for other Irkens on the Massive to know when they were passing the second most important room in the Empire, surpassed only by the vast, vault-like main chamber of the Primary Snack Warehouse on Irk itself.

The room was labeled "Foreign Visitor Toilets," and since foreigners were never allowed on the Massive, the room was never disturbed. Despite its label, it had a huge, imposing doorframe and a powerful lock; no one seemed to question this, but then the room was on a rarely-used corridor. The official name of the room was Office of the Tallest.

Red called it "a glimpse of hell."

Purple called it "reasonable justification for suicide."

And neither wanted to open the door.

"I opened it last time," Purple said.

"No you didn't, I did," Red said. "Because you said you'd done it the last time before that, too."

"Nuh-uh, I sad that the time BEFORE last time!"

"You're such a liar."

"Am not!"

"Yeah, you are."

Purple made a disgusted noise. His antennae twitched in agitation, the shafts almost vibrating. "Can't we just... get someone else to open it, and then throw 'em out the airlock?"

"No, what if someone else finds them before their head explodes from lack of air? Then they know where our office is. And can steal government secrets or something." Red wiggled his fingers, illustrating the secrets. Though he did like the idea. It was only the risk of groups like the Resisty getting their slimy little alien hands on someone who'd seen inside this room that kept him from agreeing.

Purple put his hands on his hips (which actually had taken him more practice than you'd think to master, balancing his armored guantlets on the hover belt at just the right angle to let his fingers wrap around it), but his eyes were no longer narrowed in annoyance—as they'd been for the past hour, in anticipation of this trial. Instead, they were half lidded, thoughtfully, as he regarded the door. "... What'll you give me to open the door?"

"Um..." Red reached over his shoulder into his Pak, stretching his spindly fingers to feel what he had with him. "I've got... four candy bars, some popcorn, a bag of cheese puffs, some chips..."

"What flavor?" Purple asked.

Red pulled out the bag to check. "Uh... sour fruit?"

"Sour fr— since when do they make chips out of sour fruit?"

"I'unno. That's just the flavor." Red shrugged.

Purple grabbed the bag to inspect it. "Oooh. That's NEW." As a species that survived entirely on snacks, they had to be creative to keep their diet from becoming monotonous. It is a terrible thing to grow tired of eating chips.

"Fine." Purple put the bag in his own Pak and said, "What else you got?"

What, that wasn't enough? Red thought for a moment, and then sighed. He did have something else. "Well... you... DO remember our last trip to Sintillia, don't you?"

Purple's antennae stood straight up. "Yeees?"

Sintillia was the one world that had never been on the list for conquest in either of the Operations: Impending Doom, with good reason.

The inhabitants were small, unthreatening creatures that looked like furry puffballs with hard blue gem-like eyes. Some races valued their eyes as jewelry.

That had nothing to do with the Irkens' reasons for not conquering them. They didn't like jewelry and had no sympathy for puffballs.

The reason Sintillia was protected was because of its farms. Specifically, its vast plantations, which produced a particular sugar crop that tasted sweeter than any the Irkens had ever found before and that, as far as the Irkens could tell, were unable to grow on other planets. And oh, had they TRIED to grow it on other planets. Big surprise, it turned out the Sintillates had been selectively breeding their crops to need their home planet's conditions in order to thrive. The Sintillates were willing to trade with Irk—for a steep price—but said that if they ever got so much as a hint that the Irkens were looking at their planet for conquest, they would raze their own plantations to the ground.

"Yeah... I might have a few pieces of Sintillate fudge left somewhere in my room." Red had been saving them for a special occasion, like the completion of OID-2. Or the unconditional, sudden surrender of the Sintillates, leaving the Irkens with the largest chocolate surplus they'd ever enjoyed.

"Done!" Purple tapped in the access code to the office door, and Red quickly hovered out of the way before it opened.

"Hey," Purple said, as the door started to slide open, "that wasn't so hard." Red was grateful for his ignorance. He might've struck a harder bargain if he'd thought about what was waiting behind the door.

As the door slid all the way open, the relieved smile was quickly wiped off Purple's face, to be replaced by sheer horror. For a brief, terrifying moment, a trembling wall of paper hung suspended in the doorway, before tumbling down on Purple. Red winced. All he could see was one flailing arm underneath the endless paper. Had it really been that long since they'd been in the office?

A muffled scream emanated from under the papers. Red floated over and kicked the top of Purple's gauntlet. "Shut up or I won't dig you out," Red said. "We're trying to do GOVERNMENT things, here. We can't let anyone hear us."

Purple slowly quieted down, and—after a furtive look both ways to ensure the coast was still clear—Red deactivated his hover belt so he could kneel on the ground and scoop the papers back into the room from whence they came. Man, he didn't even recognize some of these languages. Red picked up a paper, then turned a paper-upside down; the language seemed to consist of squares of various sizes. What kind of species wrote like that?? Some sort of race of blockheads?

Heh. Blockheads.

He hoped Purple would recognize it. As Tallest, they had to be able to understand any race under Irken command—so they'd split up the duty of downloading the languages. That left them with about seven hundred each.

A muffled whine drifted up from under the paper pile. "Are you still digging?"

"Yeah, of course I am!" Red threw the paper back in the room and resumed shoving papers until he saw an antenna, then the other, and finally Purple's head was exposed.

Purple looked up at Red plaintively. "Can you pull me out yet?"

Red glanced warily at the mountain of paper on Purple's back. "... Lemme try."

After ten minutes, several strained muscles, and many yelps of pain, Red managed to pull Purple out. The hall was still clear; thank goodness. Otherwise they'd be answering quite a few awkward questions. (Still, though. Some top security, for the Massive of all places.)

"You broke my arm," wailed Purple, cradling the thin limb by which Red had pulled him free, which was definitely not broken.

"Oh, calm down and help me move these," Red muttered. He leaned his shoulder against the pile of paperwork like it was a particularly lumpy piece of furniture and started shoving.

"But my arm!"

"It's not broken. Come on. Do you want to complain about you arm or contribute to the stability and growth of the Irken Empire?"

"I wanna complain about my—"

"What kind of Tallest ARE you?! Huh? You and your arm."

Miffed, Purple stuck his tongue out at Red, but nevertheless started pushing the papers as well. They managed to get the mass of it back inside, and, after scooping up and tossing in the stray paper left outside, they turned their hover belts back on to help them climb over the papers into the room. The door finally slid shut, trapping them inside.

With their paperwork.

Although the reign of Red and Purple was considered by many to be a golden age for the Irken Empire, the truth was conditions for the vast majority of the empire were abysmal. Over half the Irken population suffered in deep poverty. A further twenty-five percent was on the borderline of slipping under, and losing ground. The billions upon billions of non-Irken lifeforms being assimilated into the empire by the day were even worse off. They lived in slave-factories, vast multi-species ghettoes, or devastated worlds with rapidly dwindling populations. It wasn't because the Irkens were inherently cruel—well, they WERE inherently cruel, but that was only a secondary contributing factor. The primary issue was simply that the empire was too massive to be efficiently cared for by a bureaucracy that, like a spider web, eventually converged on a single infinitesimally small point.

Or two points, as the case may be.

And no matter how tall the Tallest were—in comparison with the empire that they were charged to rule, they were indeed very, very small.

Red and Purple gave the paperwork a helpless look, shared the helpless look with each other, and got to work. They were stuck until they finished at least enough to reach the doorpad that would let them open the exit. Best estimate, it would be a labor of at least seven hours. Purple bent down—with pained groans, still sore from being buried under the avalanche earlier—grabbed the first paper with a language he understood, and started reading. Red turned off his belt, took a seat on the papers, and grabbed another.

A request from the Invader on the Planet of Open-Minded Supermodels. He wanted whipped cream. Red pulled a stamp out of his Pak, propped the paper against one thigh, and smacked the stamp down. "REQUEST DENIED – RED". The empire didn't have the resources to fulfill the stupid request of some lazy Invader that would rather spend his time snacking than conquering. He rolled up the paper, wiggled it at Purple, and Purple grabbed it and stuck it in a chute near the ceiling—over the place where they SHOULD have had a shared desk, somewhere, buried—and it was sucked away to be taken care of. Since it was a denial, odds were against the Invader ever finding out his request had been seen, much less rejected. The Massive's messengers had no time for such courtesies.

Red had wasted thirty seconds on a useless request.

"Hey Red," Purple said, studying a paper with a frown. "Do we have any available troops?" A troop was a unit of 81 Irken Soldiers.

"A few. Why?"

"Riots on Parkinglotia. The slaves working in the hotels want to get off-planet and get food."

Well, they didn't have food to spare and they didn't have anywhere off-planet to take the slaves. Irkens knew what famines were like. They'd take care of their own before they took care of aliens. "Ugh, deny it. If the slaves don't have food, the troops that are sent there won't either. Can we... do without the slaves?"

Purple continued frowning at the paper. Then his eyes lit up. "Oh! Oh. Send in a carnivorous species to replace the current slave force. THEY'LL be well-fed."

"Brilliant."

"Thanks!" Purple stamped the paper—"REQUEST DENIED – PURPLE"—scribbled on his additional recommendation, and sent the paper up the chute.

Starvation on Unnamed Irken Colony #13—food request partially denied, after a bit of debate Red and Purple agreed that they could probably get them 30% of their original request. Extreme poverty among all but four extremely fortunate merchants on Morbia—request for financial assistance denied, but accompanied by a direct order to the four merchants to redistribute the entirety of their finances among the five hundred Irkens on planet; if they distributed what they had among all two billion inhabitants, EVERYONE would be broke. The empire had been in perpetual debt for centuries.

"Hey, hey Red." Purple fought back a giggle. "This one's from Zim."

"Oh, really?" Red smiled weakly. "What does HE want?"

"Two tons of snacks, five more MegaDoomers, and four million monies."

The Tallest locked eyes. Then they cracked up. Red leaned back against the paper pile and slid down to the floor as he gasped for breath through his hysterics. Purple only shakily managed to hold the paper up against the wall so he could slam "REQUEST DENIED – PURPLE" on the sheet.

"Wh-what a... what a LOSER!" Purple shoved the paper up the chute. "Is he completely oblivious o-or WHAT?"

"Two tons! Did he really—did he really say two tons?!"

"I'd rather send it to the Parkinglotia slaves than him!"

"Yeah! Hah! Or colony thirteen!" Red's hysterics slowly trailed off. Quietly, he said, "... I wish we COULD send another two tons to colony thirteen."

Purple's laughs immediately cut off. "Yeah. ... Or even Parkinglotia."

"Yeah."

For a moment, they looked morosely at all the paperwork around them. Purple forced himself to pick up another paper, muttering, "I'd make snacks out of ZIM, but they'd weigh less than the packaging needed to ship him to thirteen."

Red forced a laugh. "They'd probably poison whoever tried to eat them, anyway."

"Hah! Yeah."

They said very little else for the rest of the time needed to go through enough paperwork to get to the door, except to occasionally consult with each other on what limited resources to send where. They spent a half hour arguing about a stock of medicine that, quite by accident, they'd both sent to two different planets, and the next two hours not talking to each other.

Every once in a while a second chute over the long-buried desk would drop out a new request for their attention; once, with a scream of frustration, Purple grabbed a wad of papers and shoved them up the chute. The next time a request came through, they all came raining back down on Purple's head.

Purple broke into the pack of fruity chips Red had given him, and then they slowly worked their way through the rest of Red's snacks, and then—holdout that he was—through Purple's stash; and they were still hungry, groggy, bleary-eyed, and in a foul mood as they left the office.

They both tried not to look at the sea of paper they hadn't gotten to.

As they locked the door again and hovered down the hall, Red turned to Purple. "Maybe we should start looking into annexing Sintillia."

"What—and let them burn their crops? Then we get NO sugar, Red."

"No, hear me out—if we're very careful when we send in the Invader, maybe mix them in with a diplomacy mission so they don't suspect anything—"

"Until it's too late and they've been conquered?"

"Yeah! And they’d probably be hesitant to retaliate if they weren’t 100% sure they were being invaded.”

“Yeah... yeah, I get it. I mean, it's not like they WANT to burn their crops, right? That's the only reason we haven't razed them and they know it. Without that..."

They drifted off toward the bridge, conspiring.

Two heads were better than one. Twice as much paperwork stamped, twice as many cries for help ignored. But even so—even so—that was twice as much progress than a singular Tallest could make in a day's work. And at least some cries had been answered, hadn't they? It wasn't like having twice as many Tallest meant the empire suddenly had twice as much food. They did what they could.

Yes—true—the Empire was the strongest it had ever been. It held vast swathes of the galaxy in its iron grip. But no one was more aware than the Almighty Tallest themselves just how brittle that iron was.

If you want a tiny fic/story, buy me a coffee and leave a prompt in the comments!

(Feel free to reblog/add comments)

[pamphletstoinspire]

Fr. Robert Spitzer’s Prayers in Times of Suffering, Trial, and Anxiety

In times of suffering, prayer is one of the first refuges of the faithful, but it can be hard to know where to begin. In this excerpt Fr. Spitzer details what prayers he uses in his own life and how they can help.

Help

The first and most important prayer in times of suffering is “Help.” We oftentimes forget it because we think it is too easy, or that God would not respond to something that simple; but if God really is Unconditional Love, and God not only hears us but wants to help us in our time of need, then the prayer “Help” should be more than sufficient to engender the heart of God toward a myriad of unexpected graces. This prayer can be further (and beneficially) specified by a variety of other prayers. I will here mention only four which have been very important in my own life.

The Hail Mary

For some reason, this prayer has not only been a foundational contemplative prayer, but also one of galvanizing grace in times of trouble. Our Blessed Mother’s consoling presence seems to be evoked (along with her help) during the most desperateof times.

This prayer, when repeated, opens upon a consolation filled at once with familial strength, a mother’s understanding, and the assistance for a “child not fully in control.” It seems to activate a providence (a conspiracy of grace) which betokens a mother’s request of her son,much like the Wedding Feast at Cana (Jn 2:1)

Countless have been the times when it has come naturally to my mind, inviting me to repeat it. Countless too, have been the times when that repetition has led to increasing peace of mind and clarity of thought. I do not know why, but it always seems to give me courage – the courage to do what is right, to face adversaries, to move ahead with unpopular plans, and to bear the possibility of defeat bravely.

Jesus intended that His family be our family, and that His Mother,be our Mother (Jn. 19: 27), and so we can believe that she would do for us everything she would do for Her Son – particularly comforting us, interceding for us, and being protectively present tous. Speaking from experience, in my times of need, I have never been disappointed by Her.

Lord, make good come out of this suffering

Sometimes trials turn into times of suffering, and sometimes suffering has neither speedy relief nor obvious meaning. At these times, it is essential to ask for the Lord’s help to optimize the good in suffering (good for oneself, good for others,good for the community, and even good for the mystical body of Christ).

Suffering can be debilitating and depressing if we do not see any good coming from it. However, if we recognize a good in suffering for ourselves, others, the culture, the community, and even the mystical body of Christ, suffering can become not only meaningful, but an invaluable companion in the life of grace, virtue, and salvation.

The above prayer has helped me to invoke the Lord’s blessings upon my suffering (and to recognize that blessing) in the deepest ways.

When I first became aware of the onset of a serious eye problem six months before my ordination to the priesthood, I was completely baffled. Fortunately, I knew that God’s providential love would be operative through this challenge throughout the rest of my life. In that faith, I began to pray,

“Lord, do not waste one scintilla of this suffering. Make some good come out of it for me (a change in life direction, a deepening of faith and love, a protection from other adversity), for others (a zeal for Your kingdom, a desire to help others, an empathy with those in need, and an eagerness to serve the kingdom), for the culture, and for the community. Lord,please optimize the good that can come from this suffering.”

The Lord has certainly answered this prayer, for He has deepened my sense of gratitude for what I do have; He has helped me to see that every day and every moment counts in manifesting His love and presence; He has made me far more circumspect about what matters and doesn’t matter; and He has deepened my appreciation for the Beatitudes and the love intrinsic to them. I frankly cannot imagine what my priesthood or apostolic zeal would be like without my challenge. But I do know this, it would be less, much less.

Offer it up

One of the great mysteries of Christian life is that our suffering can, with Christ’s, help in the redemption of others. This is best explained in Jesus’ final words on the cross, reciting Psalm 22: “My God, my God, why have You forsaken me?” Jesus, here, was not referring only to the first line of that Psalm, but rather to the Psalm in its entirety. When one reads the Psalm one notices a man who is going through a set of trials uncannily similar to Jesus’own sufferings on the cross; but more importantly, one notices that the psalmist is not discouraged by the trials being suffered.

He has a deep trust and confidence that God will use his sufferings not only for the good of the community around him, but also to bring all the nations to Himself in the future. Thus, when Jesus recited the words, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me,”

He moved beyond the note of lamentation (in the first line) to a sublime confidence that the Father would effect universal salvation through His suffering. Jesus’ passion is His free gift of self, that is, His unconditional Love. When Jesus was dying on the cross He created a “gift of self,” that is, an unconditional Love (as scapegoat, as paschal lamb, and as blood of the covenant) which He intended to give to the Father to shower down upon humanity so that all the nations might come into His kingdom of unconditional Love.

We can imitate Christ in our own limited ways by presenting our sufferings to the Father asa “gift of self” (love) for the Father to shower down upon humanity as a grace to strengthen andunify the mystical body of Christ. Every moment of suffering is a potential for a gift of love(grace) to be showered upon humanity in its need. All we need do to convert suffering into gracefor the world is to offer it up to the Father as our gift of self.

When I was a child, I would complain to my mother about various things that had gone wrong at school, and she would say, very matter-of-factly, “Offer it up.” My general reaction was, “I’m always offering it up, and no good seems to come from it.” It only occurred to me years later that the offering was not intended to be a direct benefit to me, but rather a benefit for the world and the kingdom — which would eventually become my life’s purpose and passion.

By offering up my sufferings to God, I turn it into self-sacrifice – into gift of self – which Jesus taught is “love for the life of the world.” When I offer my suffering as a self-offering (act ofl ove) to the Father, and ask Him to make it a source of grace for those who need it, I know that He will do this – just as He did it for His Son.

In this way the negativity of suffering turns into the positivity of self-offering, love, and grace. My mother used to say, “Mothers know everything.” In this particular case, that would be true.

I give up, Lord. You take care of it

Sometimes life gets out of control. No matter how hard we try to obviate free fall or to figure ourselves out, life’s circumstances seem to get the better of us. It is at these moments that I recommend the above prayer which I have put to great use throughout my life.

I recall my discovery of this prayer in Rome back in 1980.

I had been sent to the Gregorian University to take all of my theology classes in Italian. I went to Italy two months early without any background in Italian to attain “fluency.” I was reasonably confident after studying the language in Perugia for two months that I would be able to understand my classes.

My first class on the first day was an exegesis class on the Gospel of Matthew taught by a Spanish professor who spoke Italian faster than the Italians (with a Spanish accent). I was not able to understand twenty-five percent of what he was saying, and began to panic. I kept thinking to myself (in my unqualified ignorance) that I was going to “go down.” What would I say to my Provincial? To my classmates? “Here I am, back in the United States. I couldn’t understand anything and I flunked out.”

Needless to say, I began to feel considerable discomfort. Realizing that circumstances were quite out of my control, I muttered, “I give up, Lord. You take care of it!” When I said this it seemed like steam came out of my ears. A pressure was relieved by simply giving it over to the Lord who could providentially bring some good out of my predicament. As a matter of fact, He did. The moment this prayer enabled me to calm down, I became content with understanding partial sentences and concepts. I could then begin to make sense out of the general line of thought, which, in turn, built my confidence, and, in turn, enabled me to understand more.

As the semester progressed, I began to understand far more of what the professor was saying, and eventually made it to the final exam where the professor gave two or three choices of questions for various passages of Scripture. I was able to choose questions that pertained to the last parts of the course, thereby hiding my inadequate understanding of the first part. In the end, I did quite well. (Thank You, Lord!)

Evidently, much of that success is attributable to my natural gradual appropriation of the Italian language and exegetical method, but much of it, in my opinion, was due to the composure and openness to the content induced by my trust in the Lord of love. That trust was galvanized through the above simple prayer, “I give up, Lord. You take care of it.”

Lord – Push Back the Foreboding and Darkness

Foreboding is a complex phenomenon.

Some of it can come from feelings of anxiety and depression which our conscious or unconscious psyche projects into the future—so it is internally, psychologically induced. To those, who like myself, are not materialists, there is another side to foreboding—a genuine premonition about darkness or evil in the future. I am uncertain about the cause of such premonitions—whether they are a warning from God, harassment from an evil spirit, or a kind of psychic protention—intrusion—into an impending future.

They could be the result of two or three of these causes. Whatever the cause, I believe that foreboding is not completely psychological—and that it does portend some kind of future darkness. I believe this for the simple reason that most of the time I experience it, something dark does in fact happen a few days later. It contains not only a sense of darkness, but powerlessness toward the darkness, and resembles the descriptions of it by prophets (like Jeremiah, Ezekiel, and Isaiah) — mythologists (like Thomas Malory and J.R.R. Tolkien) and litterateurs (like Sophocles and Shakespeare).

When these premonitions are accompanied by the feelings of powerlessness and anxiety—I refuse to entertain them. I give them over to the Lord immediately by saying the simple prayer, “Lord, push back this darkness and foreboding.” I even use my hands to gesture pushing back against something tangible and palpable—while I repeat the prayer, “Lord, push it back.”

Since I’m fairly sure that something dark or harmful is about to happen to me, I also use this follow-up prayer—“Lord, take care of the dark situation which is about to befall me—please protect me, and minimize the harm that may come to me.”

I frequently repeat that prayer until the foreboding begins to subside. Most of the time, the foreboding does subside. It does so in stages—first, it loses its bite and intensity, then it gradually weakens, and finally after some time,a sense of normalcy or even consolation occurs.

I can think of only a few occasions when the sense of normalcy-consolation did not occur—though the sense of foreboding decreased considerably.

Conclusion I recommend that readers use these prayers to get started on the life and adventure of transcendent grace, purpose, and happiness. They will be both an indispensable support and a passageway to even deeper faith and prayer. When you feel called to a deeper relationship with the Lord, I would recommend using two resources:1. Five Pillars of the Spiritual Life: A Practical Guide to Prayer for Active People(Ignatius 2008).2. Finding True Happiness: Satisfying our Restless Hearts (Ignatius 2015).These two resources will help you to develop three other kinds of prayer:

1. Contemplative prayer 2. Transformational prayer (called the “Examen Prayer”), and 3. A primer on how to follow the inspiration and guidance of the Holy Spirit (including a summary of “St. Ignatius’ Rules for the Discernment of Spirits”).

Catholics will want to become more deeply aware of the significance of the Holy Eucharist according to Jesus – this can be found in Five Pillars of the Spiritual Life as well as another resource, God so Loved the World: Clues to our Transcendent Destiny from the Revelation of Jesus.

The power, peace, and communion of this gift of the Lord at the Last Supper cannot be underestimated.

[pctestbench]

When it comes to the best gaming set up, everyone has their own opinions and preferences. Some like gaming on a triple monitor set up, while others prefer a single, high refresh rate screen. I say a 34″ ultra-wide is the best of both worlds. So, when we were asked to take a look at the AOC CU34G2X 34″ ultra-wide, I couldn’t wait to get my hands on it. The CU34G2X from AOC is a 34″ ultra-wide with a 21:9 aspect ratio. With a refresh rate of 144 Hz, a 1 MS response time, and a beautiful 3440 x 1440 resolution, the CU34G2X is designed with gaming in mind. However, there are several other benefits to having an ultra-wide monitor that goes beyond just gaming.  So, we put the CU34G2X to the test to see the benefits out way the cost of on paper, what looks to be a great option for anyone looking for an ultra-wide monitor. But specs aside, how does the CU34G2X perform, let’s find out.

  We would like to thank AOC for providing us a sample of the CU34G2X to check out!

Specifications

Monitor color

Black Red

Monitor size

34 inch

Resolution

3440×1440

Refresh rate

144Hz

Response time 

1 ms

Panel type

VA

Backlight

WLED

Aspect ratio

21:9

Brightness

300

Contrast (dynamic)

80M:1

Pixel pitch

0.23175

Active Screen Area

797.22 x 333.72

Viewing Angle

178/178 º

Colors

16.7 Million

Bezel type

Frameless

OSD languages

EN, FR, ES, PT, DE, IT, NL, SE, FI, PL, CZ, RU, KR, CN (T), CN (S), JP

Connections

Signal input

HDMI 2.0 x 2

DisplayPort 1.4 x 2

Display Port version

1.4

USB Input

USB 3.2 (Gen1) x 4

Audio output

Headphone out (3.5 mm)

Features

Curved screen Curved

What’s in the box

HDMI Cable 1.8 m

Displayport Cable 1.8 m

Power shuko c5 Cable 1.8 m

Sustainability

RoHS 

Ergonomics

Swivel -30°±2°~+30±2° °

Tilt -5±2°~+23±2° °

Ergonomic height amount 130mm

Base removal 

VESA 100×100

Power

Power supply

Internal

Power Consumption On

37W watt

Power Consumption Standby

<0.5W watt

Dimensions

Carton dimensions mm x mm x mm

903x548x280

Net weight excluding packaging

8 kg

Gross weight including packaging

9.47 kg

Warranty

Warranty period 3 Years

A Closer Look at the AOC CU34G2X

Being an ultra-wide, the CU34G2X takes up a fair amount of desk space measuring 903 mm x 548 mm x 280 mm. However it also gives you a fair amount of screen space without having to deal with annoying bezels like on multi-screen set-ups. The CU34G2X is also a curved monitor. We all know the benefits of a curved screen. A curved screen offers wider viewing angles. The shape also gives you the illusion of panoramic viewing. But overall, a curved ultra-wide screen offers an all-around more immersive experience than even a flat ultra-wide can.

  The CU34G2X from AOC is a 34″ ultra-wide with an aspect ratio of 21:9, a resolution of 3440 x 1440, a 1 ms response time, and a refresh rate of 144 Hz. The CU32G2X has a vertical alignment or VA panel that is back-lit by white light-emitting diodes, or WLEDs. The VA panel on the CU32G2X has a dynamic contrast ratio of 80M:1. The CU32G2X has a viewing angle of 178/178° and sports 16.7 million colors. The stand on the CU34G2X does both swivel and tilt. The swivel range is between -30°±2°~+30±2° and the tilt range is between -5±2°~+23±2°.

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In addition to both tilt and swivel, the height of the CU34G2X can also be adjusted. At its highest point, the bottom edge of the CU34G2X sits 6.25″ or 158.75 mm from the top of the desk. At its lowest point, the bottom edge of the monitor sits only 1.25″ or 31.75 mm from the top of the desk.

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The CU34G2X has the standard 100 mm x 100 mm VESA mount. It even comes equipped with VESA mount screws already attached to the back of the monitor. The included stand does not require screws to install. It simply slides into place at the top of the VESA mount cutout and clicks into place at the bottom. There is a release switch on the mounting plate on the stand. Pushing this switch up releases the stand from the monitor.

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The Stand for the CU34G2X is made prominently out of plastic, aside from the part that attaches to the actual monitor. But more on that later.  As we mentioned earlier, the stand on the CU34G2X both swivels, as well as raises and lowers. Also, there is a cutout in the actual stand made for cable management. This is a small but welcomed feature. Especially when you have as many cables running through your office as I do.

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On the back panel, there are four USB 3.2 (Gen 1) ports and one USB B port. Using a USB A to B cable, you can power the other USB ports on your monitor. The Yellow USB 3.2 (Gen 1) port is an always-on port.  So, as long as the USB A to B cable is connected to your PC, even when the PC is off, this port will have power. I keep my phone charger plugged into the always-on port so I can always charge my phone.  For video, there are two HDMI 2.0 ports and two Display Port 1.4 ports. Last, there is a single 3.5 mm audio out port for headphones, speakers, or a soundbar.

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The CU34G2X has an internal power supply. This means, no external power brick. When on, the CU34G2X consumers about 37 watts per hour. When on stand by, the CU34G2X uses less than 0.5 watts per hour. The CU34G2X uses a standard computer power cord (NEMA 5-15P to IEC 320 C13). The port for the power cable is located left of the monitor when looking at it from the front. Just below the port for the power cord is a Kensington Security Slot for a Kensington Lock. For those who may not know what a Kensington Lock is, more on that here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kensington_Security_Slot

AOC describes the CU34G2X as having a frame-less bezel. Unlike traditional monitors that have a bezel around the screen, the panel on the CU34G2X goes directly to the edge. So, if you were to pair two or more of these monitors together, there wouldn’t be a large gap between monitors. But, there is only so much to say about the outside of a monitor. So, let’s get into the initial assembly.

Assembly

This section will consist of assembling the actual monitor. The assembly of the CU34G2X is rather straight forward. The base has four feet. Two small feet on the back and two large feet on the front. In the center of the base, there are two metal nipples, for lack of a better word. In the center, you can see the tip of a bolt that will attach the stand to the arm.

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The center of the base has a red ring around the part that swivels. There is a cutout in the middle of this red ring for the stand arm to sit in, as well as slots for the stand base to sit in on the arm. There is a screw with a wing nut on the bottom of the base of the stand. This screw tightens down to secure the arm to the base.

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As we mentioned earlier, the CU34G2X has a standard 100 x 100 VESA mount. The Stand is made up of mostly plastic. However, there is a metal VESA mounting plate on the arm. This is the part that attaches to the actual monitor. there are two metal clips at the top of the plate, and two plastic clips at the bottom. The plastic clips are what snaps the monitor on to the stand. On the back of the mounting plate, there is a release switch for the monitor stand.

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Now that our CU34G2X is assembled, its time to get into the OSD, or on-screen display.

On-Screen Display

I’ll admit, I never, ever go into the OSD, or on-screen display for any monitor I buy. I generally find them annoying and tedious to use. I am still holding out hope that someone will put out a monitor with a remote. That being said, the OSD for the CU34G2X from AOC wasn’t difficult to navigate at all. My one complaint on the OSD is I have a hard time seeing the icons on the bezel. But, that is due to my poor eyesight.  However, my camera can see them. So, going from right to left, there is first a light that indicates power. If the monitor is on, the light will be in. Next, there is a power button. For the actual OSD controls, there is the Menu button, that brings up the OSD, the scroll right and scroll left buttons, and the Go Back, or return button.

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Before we get into the OSD, there are a couple of quick menus that can be brought up with the touch of a button. Pressing the “Go Back” button for the OSD will bring up the input selection menu. Pressing the left arrow button will bring up gaming mode. Pressing it again when the Game Mode box is on the screen, it will allow you to scroll through the different game modes. Pressing the right arrow will put a crosshair on the center of the screen. Now, on to the menu.

When using the OSD for the CU34G2X, the fist section the menu will open to is Luminance. In this section, you can adjust settings such as contrast, brightness, and Gamma. Here is where you can also enable modes such as ECO Mode, DCR, and HDR mode.

The next section on the OSD is the Color Set-Up section. Here, you can set the color temperature. You can also enable DCR, or Dynamic Contrast Ratio mode, as well as enable the DCR demo. Enabling the DCR demo will initiate a split-screen mode. One side with DCR enabled and the other with it disabled. This is more meant for when the monitor is on display at say a retailer like Best Buy or Microcenter. Also in color setup, you and adjust the RGB levels. By this I mean the red, green, and blue levels on the display. Not RGB lighting, The RGB levels can only be adjusted when the color temp is in User Mode.

The picture boost section has an option called Bright Frame. This allows you to create a picture frame of sorts in any position on the monitor, at any size. Inside the picture frame you create, you can control the brightness and contrast of that section of the screen, separately from the rest of the screen.

The OSD settings allow you to adjust the settings of the On-Screen Display. you can adjust everything from position to transparency. You can also switch between several different languages including English, French, and Spanish just to name a few. a full list is in the Specifications section of this review. There is also an option to adjust the volume of the audio output, as well as the timeout of the OSD. I wish I had played with that one before trying to take pictures of the OSD.

The PIP, or Picture in Picture menu allows you to set up just that, the picture in picture feature. It allows you to select from the four inputs, what one you want as the main display, and what one you want as the secondary display. You can select from three different sizes, small, medium, and large. You can enable or disable the audio as well and select the position you want the secondary display.

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The Gaming section is where you can customize your CU34G2X for gaming. Here you can enable game mode. Game mode will lower your response time, but usually at the cost of image quality. But not that much. The gaming settings also have shadow control, game color, and MBR, or Motion Blur Reduction sliders. You can also enable Adaptive Sync, Pixel Overdrive, and LowBlue modes in the Gaming section. But, my favorite feature in the Gaming Settings has to be the FPS counter that can be enabled.

The final section of the OSD is the Extras section. here you can select the different inputs, reset all settings, and set an off timer. Now, let’s get into my personal experience with the CU34G2X from AOC.

Testing and Benchmarks

Test System

Processor

Intel Core I7 9700K (Confidential Processor)

Motherboard

Aorus Z390 Pro

 Graphics Card

AORUS RTX 2080 Waterforce

Memory

Aorus RGB Memory 3200 MHz Cas 16

Storage

512 GB Crucial P1 NVM3 M.2 SSD

Power Supply

850 Watt EVGA SuperNova P2 80+ Platinum

Cooler

Custom Cooled

XSPC D5 pump

XSPC Photon 270 ml Reservoir

360 mm x 60 mm Radiator

3 Fractal Design Prisma Fans

3 EK Vardar Fans

EK Vector RGB Waterblock

Case

Thermaltake Core P5

Games

Assassin’s Creed Odyssey

Deus Ex: Mankind Divided

Far Cry New Dawn

Far Cry 5

Strange Brigade (DX12)

Strange Brigade (Vulcan)

Red Dead Redemption 2 (DX12)

Red Dead Redemption 2 (Vulcan)

Shadow of the Tomb Raider

Wolfenstein Young Blood

Testing a monitor is unlike testing say a graphics card. It isn’t much different I’d do from my day to day uses as most of the experience is very subjective. However, there is a process for everything. So, the first step once the monitor was set up and ready was to calibrate the screen using the Spider5 calibration tool and the Spider5 Express software as that’s what came with the actual tool. Once Spider 5 Express was installed, we placed the sensor on the screen, and it took about 4 or 5 minutes to calibrate as the screen changed to several different colors.

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Once the CU34G2X from AOC was calibrated, it was time to get to the real-world testing. Now, I’ve been using the CU34G2X for about a month and a half. I previously had a 34″ ultra-wide that I sent an umbrella stand through. When it came time to replace it, I ended up with a 32″ 144 Hz screen in its place. I have felt empty ever since. Until the CU34G2X hit my desk. Now, for gaming, an ultra-wide is a great option. However, the benefits of an ultra-wide go far beyond just gaming. Originally, I had a 3 27″ 1080p monitors and I used to game in surround. When I first started writing reviews, I opted for an ultra-wide simply so I could include 3440 x 1440 resolution in my gaming results.  Then, I started getting into editing in Photoshop and Premiere Pro. No, it wasn’t Photoshop that made me fall in love with this monitor as I have a 10-Bit 4k monitor for editing pictures and the CU34G2X is only an 8-bit panel. It wasn’t even gaming, but Premiere Pro. I forgot how great it is to have all that extra screen space dedicated to my timeline.

With a 1 ms response time and 144 Hz refresh rate, the CU34G2X was designed with gaming in mind. and it does an excellent job in-game. The 144 Hz refresh rate gives you buttery-smooth game play. But, depending on the game, there are random dips here and there. So, I enabled adaptive sync as well as the on-screen frame counter. Adaptive sync dynamically adjusts the refresh rate to match the refresh rate of the GPU. The CU34G23X is the first monitor I’ve ever tested that has adaptive sync. I have Freesync monitor sure, but I’ve never had a GPU that supports FreeSync. So, I had never really used adaptive sync before, until testing the CU34G2X.  I was so impressed with how well adaptive sync works. It kept even RDR2 running at 144 Hz and it looked amazing. We decided to add in some gaming benchmarks for the RTX 2080 Waterforce in amazing 3440 x 1440 resolution, at 144 Hz and adaptive sync off.

All games were tested at their highest preset. in 3440 x 1440 resolution. The system we used consisted of an i7-9700k, AORUS RTX 2080 Waterforce, and 16 GB of AORUS RGB memory running at 3600 MHz. The two best performing games were Strange Brigade in Vulcan and Wolfenstein Young Blood. Strange Brigade in Vulcan averaged 104 frames per second on the RTX 2080 Waterforce in 3440 x 1440 resolution. Wolfenstein Young Blood was second with an average of 102 frames per second. Strange Brigade in DX12 was next with an average of 88 frames per second. Far Cry New Dawn and Far Cry 5 were both close in averages. Far Cry New Dawn averaged 76 frames per second and Far Cry 5 averaged 74. Shadow of the Tomb Raider was next on our list with an average of 57 frames per second followed by Deus Ex with an average of 51 frames per second. Red Dead Redemption 2 in Vulcan averaged 49 frames per second. In DX12, Red Dead Redemption 2 tied with Assassin’s Creed Odyssey with an average of 46 Frames Per Second. Now with all that being said, enabling adaptive sync the built-in frame counter was always at 144 Hz in any game I played. Except for one. My absolute favorite experience with the CU34G2X from AOC had to be playing modded Skyrim in 3440 x 1440 resolution. Although the game doesn’t support a 21:9 aspect ratio, it can be tweaked in the INI files of the game to support 3440 x 1440 resolution. and it looks great. But this was the one game that the frame counter was locked at 100. Without adaptive sync, Skyrim usually stays locked at 60 frames per second, or at least won’t go higher than 60 frames per second.

Final Thoughts and Conclusion

Overall, I can’t say enough good about the CU34G2X from AOC. I’ve owned other ultra-wide monitors before. However, this is the first time I’ve had a 34″ ultra-wide with a 144 Hz refresh rate in my office. I remember now why I originally switched from a triple screen set up to a single ultra-wide. The CU34G2X offers an amazing and immersive gaming experience. The curved screen offers better viewing angles than a flat version would and it just looks better than any flat screen I own. For an 8-it panel, the CU34G2X offers very vivid and bright colors, as well as deep, dark blacks. This makes the CU34G2X a great option for gamers who also do some editing on the side. For a YouTuber who is just uploading twitch streams or talking head videos, the colors on the CU34G2X are more than good enough for editing both video and even stills. Now, if you edit on a more professional level and get into color grading, then this probably isn’t the monitor for you. But again, this is a gaming monitor, not a professional one.

Games ran great on the CU34G2X. The gaming features on this monitor are plenty. One feature I never expected to use was the picture in picture feature. This was a very useful feature, especially when bench-marking. When running benchmarks, I won’t run anything else on that system in case it messes up the benchmark. So, having a picture in picture was great. I had two computers hooked up to the CU34G2X and when I was running benchmarks, I could still watch YouTube or and my benchmark on the same screen. It’s the little things in life. This was my first experience with adaptive sync and I fell in love with it. It is one of those features that you can’t go back to not using once you experience it. When my previous ultra-wide broke, I just couldn’t afford to drop another $1000 on a 34″ ultra-wide. So, I’ve put it off for a very long time. Generally, the features I am personally looking for in an ultra-wide would run between $700 and $1000. But, the MSRP of the CU34G2X from AOC when it officially launches on May 12, 2020, is only USD 449.99. That is an amazing price for the number of features AOC crammed into this 34″ ultra-wide. The CU34G2X is the ultra-wide monitor I have been waiting for for a very long time. Try it out, you won’t be disappointed!

[sc name=”award-editors-choice” ]

      AOC CU34G2X 34″ Curved Ultra Wide Monitor Review When it comes to the best gaming set up, everyone has their own opinions and preferences. Some like gaming on a triple monitor set up, while others prefer a single, high refresh rate screen.

[isabelleloveyouall-blog]

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http://www.recitequran.com/fr/tafsir/en.ibn-kathir/3:1

لتكملة  التفسير ادخل    go heir

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Tafsir

3

Ali-‘Imran

La famille de ‘imran

https://youtu.be/gsC2AnaV9y0

Ibn Kathir – Anglais

Chapitre

SUIVEZ-NOUS

Verset

1

Page 50

(Chapter 3)

Surah Al `Imran was revealed in Al-Madinah, as evident by the fact that the first eighty-three Ayat in it relate to the delegation from Najran that arrived in Al-Madinah on the ninth year of Hijrah (632 CE). We will elaborate on this subject when we explain the Ayah about the Mubahalah (3:61) in this Surah, Allah willing. We should also state that we mentioned the virtues of Surah Al `Imran along with the virtues of Surat Al-Baqarah in the beginning of the Tafsir of Surat Al-Baqarah.

﴿ بِسۡمِ ٱللَّهِ ٱلرَّحۡمَـٰنِ ٱلرَّحِيمِ ﴾

﴿ الٓمٓ • ذَٲلِكَ ٱلۡڪِتَـٰبُ لَا رَيۡبَ‌ۛ فِيهِ‌ۛ هُدً۬ى لِّلۡمُتَّقِينَ • ٱلَّذِينَ يُؤۡمِنُونَ بِٱلۡغَيۡبِ وَيُقِيمُونَ ٱلصَّلَوٰةَ وَمِمَّا رَزَقۡنَـٰهُمۡ يُنفِقُونَ • وَٱلَّذِينَ يُؤۡمِنُونَ بِمَآ أُنزِلَ إِلَيۡكَ وَمَآ أُنزِلَ مِن قَبۡلِكَ وَبِٱلۡأَخِرَةِ هُمۡ يُوقِنُونَ ﴾

(In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful) (1. Alif-Lam-Mim.) (2. Allah! None has the right to be worshipped but He, the Ever Living, the One Who sustains and protects all that exists.) (3. It is He Who has sent down the Book to you with truth, confirming what came before it. And He sent down the Tawrah and the Injil,) (4. Aforetime, as a guidance to mankind. And He sent down the criterion. Truly, those who disbelieve in the Ayat of Allah, for them there is a severe torment; and Allah is All-Mighty, All-Able of Retribution.)

We mentioned the Hadith in the Tafsir of Ayat Al-Kurs (2:255) that mentions that Allah’s Greatest Name is contained in these two Ayat,

﴿ ٱللَّهُ لَآ إِلَـٰهَ إِلَّا هُوَ ٱلۡحَىُّ ٱلۡقَيُّومُ ﴾

(Allah! None has the right to be worshipped but He, the Ever Living, the One Who sustains and protects all that exists) and,

﴿ الٓمٓ • ذَٲلِكَ ٱلۡڪِتَـٰبُ لَا رَيۡبَ‌ۛ فِيهِ‌ۛ هُدً۬ى لِّلۡمُتَّقِينَ ﴾

(Alif-Lam-Mim. Allah! None has the right to be worshipped but He, the Ever Living, the One Who sustains and protects all that exists.)

We also explained the Tafsir of,

﴿ الٓمٓ ﴾

(Alif-Lam-Mim) in the beginning of Surat Al-Baqarah, and the meaning of,

﴿ ٱللَّهُ لَآ إِلَـٰهَ إِلَّا هُوَ ٱلۡحَىُّ ٱلۡقَيُّومُ ﴾

(Allah! La ilaha illa Huwa, Al-Hayyul-Qayyum) in the Tafsir of Ayat Al-Kursi. Allah’s statement,

﴿ نَزَّلَ عَلَيۡكَ ٱلۡكِتَـٰبَ بِٱلۡحَقِّ ﴾

(It is He Who has sent down the Book to you with truth, ) means, revealed the Qur’an to you, O Muhammad, in truth, meaning there is no doubt or suspicion that it is revealed from Allah. Verily, Allah revealed the Qur’an with His knowledge, and the angels testify to this fact, Allah is sufficient as a Witness. Allah’s statement,

﴿ مُصَدِّقً۬ا لِّمَا بَيۡنَ يَدَيۡهِ ﴾

(Confirming what came before it) means, from the previous divinely revealed Books, sent to the servants and Prophets of Allah. These Books testify to the truth of the Qur’an, and the Qur’an also testifies to the truth these Books contained, including the news and glad tidings of Muhammad’s prophethood and the revelation of the Glorious Qur’an.

Allah said,

﴿ وَأَنزَلَ ٱلتَّوۡرَٮٰةَ ﴾

(And He sent down the Tawrah) to Musa (Musa) son of `Imran,

﴿ وَٱلۡإِنجِيلَ ﴾

(And the Injil), to `Isa, son of Mary,

﴿ مِن قَبۡلُ ﴾

(Aforetime) meaning, before the Qur’an was revealed,

﴿ هُدً۬ى لِّلنَّاسِ ﴾

(As a guidance to mankind) in their time.

﴿ وَأَنزَلَ ٱلۡفُرۡقَانَ‌ۗ ﴾

(And He sent down the criterion) which is the distinction between misguidance, falsehood and deviation on one hand, and guidance, truth and piety on the other hand. This is because of the indications, signs, plain evidences and clear proofs that it contains, and because of its explanations, clarifications, etc.

Allah’s statement,

﴿ إِنَّ ٱلَّذِينَ كَفَرُواْ بِـَٔايَـٰتِ ٱللَّهِ ﴾

(Truly, those who disbelieve in the Ayat of Allah) means they denied, refused and unjustly rejected them,

﴿ لَهُمۡ عَذَابٌ۬ شَدِيدٌ۬‌ۗ ﴾

(For them there is a severe torment) on the Day of Resurrection,

﴿ وَٱللَّهُ عَزِيزٌ۬ ﴾

(And Allah is All-Mighty) meaning, His grandeur is invincible and His sovereignty is infinite,

﴿ ذُو ٱنتِقَامٍ ﴾

(All-Able of Retribution.) from those who reject His Ayat and defy His honorable Messengers and great Prophets.

﴿ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ لَا يَخۡفَىٰ عَلَيۡهِ شَىۡءٌ۬ فِى ٱلۡأَرۡضِ وَلَا فِى ٱلسَّمَآءِ • هُوَ ٱلَّذِى يُصَوِّرُڪُمۡ فِى ٱلۡأَرۡحَامِ كَيۡفَ يَشَآءُ‌ۚ لَآ إِلَـٰهَ إِلَّا هُوَ ٱلۡعَزِيزُ ٱلۡحَكِيمُ ﴾

(5. Truly, nothing is hidden from Allah, in the earth or in the heaven.) (6. He it is Who shapes you in the wombs as He wills. None has the right to be worshipped but He, the Almighty, the All-Wise.)

Allah states that He has perfect knowledge in the heavens and earth and that nothing in them is hidden from His watch.

﴿ هُوَ ٱلَّذِى يُصَوِّرُڪُمۡ فِى ٱلۡأَرۡحَامِ كَيۡفَ يَشَآءُ‌ۚ ﴾

(He it is Who shapes you in the wombs as He wills.) meaning, He creates you in the wombs as He wills, whether male or female, handsome or otherwise, happy or miserable.

﴿ لَآ إِلَـٰهَ إِلَّا هُوَ ٱلۡعَزِيزُ ٱلۡحَكِيمُ ﴾

(La ilaha illa Huwa (none has the right to be worshipped but He), the Almighty, the All-Wise.) meaning, He is the Creator and thus is the only deity worthy of worship, without partners, and His is the perfect might, wisdom and decision. This Ayah refers to the fact that `Isa, son of Mary, is a created servant, just as Allah created the rest of mankind. Allah created `Isa in the womb (of his mother) and shaped him as He willed. Therefore, how could `Isa be divine, as the Christians, may Allah’s curses descend on them, claim `Isa was created in the womb and his creation changed from stage to stage, just as Allah said,

﴿ يَخۡلُقُكُمۡ فِى بُطُونِ أُمَّهَـٰتِڪُمۡ خَلۡقً۬ا مِّنۢ بَعۡدِ خَلۡقٍ۬ فِى ظُلُمَـٰتٍ۬ ثَلَـٰثٍ۬‌ۚ ﴾

(He creates you in the wombs of your mothers, creation after creation in three veils of darkness.) (39:6).

﴿ هُوَ ٱلَّذِىٓ أَنزَلَ عَلَيۡكَ ٱلۡكِتَـٰبَ مِنۡهُ ءَايَـٰتٌ۬ مُّحۡكَمَـٰتٌ هُنَّ أُمُّ ٱلۡكِتَـٰبِ وَأُخَرُ مُتَشَـٰبِهَـٰتٌ۬‌ۖ فَأَمَّا ٱلَّذِينَ فِى قُلُوبِهِمۡ زَيۡغٌ۬ فَيَتَّبِعُونَ مَا تَشَـٰبَهَ مِنۡهُ ٱبۡتِغَآءَ ٱلۡفِتۡنَةِ وَٱبۡتِغَآءَ تَأۡوِيلِهِۦ‌ۗ وَمَا يَعۡلَمُ تَأۡوِيلَهُ ۥۤ إِلَّا ٱللَّهُ‌ۗ وَٱلرَّٲسِخُونَ فِى ٱلۡعِلۡمِ يَقُولُونَ ءَامَنَّا بِهِۦ كُلٌّ۬ مِّنۡ عِندِ رَبِّنَا‌ۗ وَمَا يَذَّكَّرُ إِلَّآ أُوْلُواْ ٱلۡأَلۡبَـٰبِ • رَبَّنَا لَا تُزِغۡ قُلُوبَنَا بَعۡدَ إِذۡ هَدَيۡتَنَا وَهَبۡ لَنَا مِن لَّدُنكَ رَحۡمَةً‌ۚ إِنَّكَ أَنتَ ٱلۡوَهَّابُ • رَبَّنَآ إِنَّكَ جَامِعُ ٱلنَّاسِ لِيَوۡمٍ۬ لَّا رَيۡبَ فِيهِ‌ۚ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ لَا يُخۡلِفُ ٱلۡمِيعَادَ ﴾

(7. It is He Who has sent down to you the Book. In it are verses that are entirely clear, they are the foundations of the Book; and others not entirely clear. So as for those in whose hearts there is a deviation (from the truth) they follow (only) that which is not entirely clear thereof, seeking Al-Fitnah, and seeking its Ta’wil, but none knows its Ta’wil except Allah. And those who are firmly grounded in knowledge say: “We believe in it; all of it is from our Lord.” And none receive admonition except men of understanding.) (8. (They say): “Our Lord! Let not our hearts deviate (from the truth) after You have guided us, and grant us mercy from You. Truly, You are the Bestower.”) (9. “Our Lord! Verily, it is You Who will gather mankind together on the Day about which there is no doubt. Verily, Allah never breaks His Promise.”)

LIRE

Tafsir

3

Ali-‘Imran

La famille de ‘imran

Ibn Kathir – Anglais

Chapitre

SUIVEZ-NOUS

Verset

10

Page 51

Only Allah Knows the True Ta’wil (Interpretation) of the Mutashabihat

Allah said,

﴿ وَمَا يَعۡلَمُ تَأۡوِيلَهُ ۥۤ إِلَّا ٱللَّهُ‌ۗ ﴾

(But none knows its Ta’wil except Allah.)

Similarly, as preceded in what has been reported from Ibn `Abbas, “Tafsir is of four types: Tafsir that the Arabs know in their language; Tafsir that no one is excused of being ignorant of; Tafsir that the scholars know; and Tafsir that only Allah knows.” Scholars of Qur’an recitation have different opinions about pausing at Allah’s Name in this Ayah. This stop was reported from `A’ishah, `Urwah, Abu Ash-Sha`tha’ and Abu Nahik.

Some pause after reciting,

﴿ وَٱلرَّٲسِخُونَ فِى ٱلۡعِلۡمِ ﴾

(And those who are firmly grounded in knowledge) saying that the Qur’an does not address the people with what they cannot understand. Ibn Abi Najih said that Mujahid said that Ibn `Abbas said, “I am among those who are firmly grounded in its Ta’wil interpretation.” The Messenger of Allah supplicated for the benefit of Ibn `Abbas,

« اللَّهُمَّ فَقِّهْهُ فِي الدِّينِ وَعَلِّمْهُ التَّأْوِيل »

(O Allah! Bestow on him knowledge in the religion and teach him the Ta’wil (interpretation).)

Ta’wil has two meanings in the Qur’an, the true reality of things, and what they will turn out to be. For instance, Allah said,

﴿ وَقَالَ يَـٰٓأَبَتِ هَـٰذَا تَأۡوِيلُ رُءۡيَـٰىَ مِن قَبۡلُ ﴾

(And he said: “O my father! This is the Ta’wil of my dream aforetime!”.) (12:100), and,

﴿ هَلۡ يَنظُرُونَ إِلَّا تَأۡوِيلَهُ ۥ‌ۚ يَوۡمَ يَأۡتِى تَأۡوِيلُهُ ۥ ﴾

(Await they just for it’s Ta’wil On the Day (Day of Resurrection) it’s Ta’wil is finally fulfilled.) (7:53) refers to the true reality of Resurrection that they were told about. If this is the meaning desired in the Ayah above (3:7), then pausing after reciting Allah’s Name is warranted, because only Allah knows the true reality of things. In this case, Allah’s statement,

﴿ وَٱلرَّٲسِخُونَ فِى ٱلۡعِلۡمِ ﴾

(And those who are firmly grounded in knowledge) is connected to His statement,

﴿ يَقُولُونَ ءَامَنَّا بِهِۦ ﴾

(say: “We believe in it”) If the word Ta’wil means the second meaning, that is, explaining and describing, such as what Allah said,

﴿ نَبِّئۡنَا بِتَأۡوِيلِهِۦۤ‌ۖ ﴾

((They said): “Inform us of the Ta’wil of this”) meaning its explanation, then pausing after reciting,

﴿ وَٱلرَّٲسِخُونَ فِى ٱلۡعِلۡمِ ﴾

(And those who are firmly grounded in knowledge) is warranted. This is because the scholars have general knowledge in, and understand what they were addressed with, even though they do not have knowledge of the true reality of things. Therefore, Allah’s statement,

﴿ يَقُولُونَ ءَامَنَّا بِهِۦ ﴾

(say: “We believe in it”) describes the conduct of the scholars. Similarly, Allah said,

﴿ وَجَآءَ رَبُّكَ وَٱلۡمَلَكُ صَفًّ۬ا صَفًّ۬ا ﴾

(And your Lord comes, and the angels, in rows.) (89:22) means, your Lord will come, and the angels will come in rows.

Allah’s statement that the knowledgeable people proclaim,

﴿ يَقُولُونَ ءَامَنَّا بِهِۦ ﴾

(We believe in it) means, they believe in the Mutashabih.

﴿ كُلٌّ۬ مِّنۡ عِندِ رَبِّنَا‌ۗ ﴾

(all of it is from our Lord) meaning, both the Muhkam and the Mutashabih are true and authentic, and each one of them testifies to the truth of the other. This is because they both are from Allah and nothing that comes from Allah is ever met by contradiction or discrepancy. Allah said,

﴿ أَفَلَا يَتَدَبَّرُونَ ٱلۡقُرۡءَانَ‌ۚ وَلَوۡ كَانَ مِنۡ عِندِ غَيۡرِ ٱللَّهِ لَوَجَدُواْ فِيهِ ٱخۡتِلَـٰفً۬ا ڪَثِيرً۬ا ﴾

(Do they not then consider the Qur’an carefully? Had it been from other than Allah, they would surely have found therein many a contradiction.) (4:82).

Allah said in his Ayah (3:7),

﴿ وَمَا يَذَّكَّرُ إِلَّآ أُوْلُواْ ٱلۡأَلۡبَـٰبِ ﴾

(And none receive admonition except men of understanding.) meaning, those who have good minds and sound comprehension, understand, contemplate and comprehend the meaning in the correct manner. Further, Ibn Al-Mundhir recorded in his Tafsir that Nafi` bin Yazid said, “Those firmly grounded in knowledge are those who are modest for Allah’s sake, humbly seek His pleasure, and do not exaggerate regarding those above them, or belittle those below them.”

Allah said that they supplicate to their Lord,

﴿ رَبَّنَا لَا تُزِغۡ قُلُوبَنَا بَعۡدَ إِذۡ هَدَيۡتَنَا ﴾

(Our Lord! Let not our hearts deviate (from the truth) after You have guided us.) meaning, “Do not deviate our hearts from the guidance after You allowed them to acquire it. Do not make us like those who have wickedness in their hearts, those who follow the Mutashabih in the Qur’an. Rather, make us remain firmly on Your straight path and true religion.”

﴿ وَهَبۡ لَنَا مِن لَّدُنكَ ﴾

(And grant us from Ladunka) meaning, from You,

﴿ رَحۡمَةً‌ۚ ﴾

(Mercy) with which You make our hearts firm, and increase in our Faith and certainty,

﴿ إِنَّكَ أَنتَ ٱلۡوَهَّابُ ﴾

(Truly, You are the Bestower)

Ibn Abi Hatim and Ibn Jarir recorded that Umm Salamah said that the Prophet used to supplicate,

« يَا مُقَلِّبَ الْقُلُوبِ ثَبِّتْ قَلْبِي عَلَى دِينِك »

(O You Who changes the hearts, make my heart firm on Your religion.)

He then recited,

﴿ رَبَّنَا لَا تُزِغۡ قُلُوبَنَا بَعۡدَ إِذۡ هَدَيۡتَنَا وَهَبۡ لَنَا مِن لَّدُنكَ رَحۡمَةً‌ۚ إِنَّكَ أَنتَ ٱلۡوَهَّابُ ﴾

(“Our Lord! Let not our hearts deviate (from the truth) after You have guided us, and grant us mercy from You. Truly, You are the Bestower.”) The Ayah continues,

﴿ رَبَّنَآ إِنَّكَ جَامِعُ ٱلنَّاسِ لِيَوۡمٍ۬ لَّا رَيۡبَ فِيهِ‌ۚ ﴾

(“Our Lord! Verily, it is You Who will gather mankind together on the Day about which there is no doubt”) meaning, they say in their supplication: O our Lord! You will gather Your creation on the Day of Return, judge between them and decide over what they disputed about. Thereafter, You will reward or punish each according to the deeds they did in this life.

﴿ إِنَّ ٱلَّذِينَ كَفَرُواْ لَن تُغۡنِىَ عَنۡهُمۡ أَمۡوَٲلُهُمۡ وَلَآ أَوۡلَـٰدُهُم مِّنَ ٱللَّهِ شَيۡـًٔ۬ا‌ۖ وَأُوْلَـٰٓٮِٕكَ هُمۡ وَقُودُ ٱلنَّارِ • ڪَدَأۡبِ ءَالِ فِرۡعَوۡنَ وَٱلَّذِينَ مِن قَبۡلِهِمۡ‌ۚ كَذَّبُواْ بِـَٔايَـٰتِنَا فَأَخَذَهُمُ ٱللَّهُ بِذُنُوبِہِمۡ‌ۗ وَٱللَّهُ شَدِيدُ ٱلۡعِقَابِ ﴾

(10. Verily, those who disbelieve, neither their properties nor their offspring will avail them whatsoever against Allah; and it is they who will be fuel of the Fire.) (11. Like the behavior of the people of Fir`awn and those before them; they belied Our Ayat. So Allah punished them for their sins. And Allah is severe in punishment.)

On the Day of Resurrection, No Wealth or Offspring Shall Avail

Allah states that the disbelievers shall be fuel for the Fire,

﴿ يَوۡمَ لَا يَنفَعُ ٱلظَّـٰلِمِينَ مَعۡذِرَتُہُمۡۖ وَلَهُمُ ٱللَّعۡنَةُ وَلَهُمۡ سُوٓءُ ٱلدَّارِ ﴾

(The Day when their excuses will be of no profit to wrongdoers. Theirs will be the curse, and theirs will be the evil abode (i.e. painful torment in Hell-fire).) (40:52).

Further, what they were granted in this life of wealth and offspring shall not avail them with Allah, or save them from His punishment and severe torment. Similarly, Allah said,

﴿ فَلَا تُعۡجِبۡكَ أَمۡوَٲلُهُمۡ وَلَآ أَوۡلَـٰدُهُمۡ‌ۚ إِنَّمَا يُرِيدُ ٱللَّهُ لِيُعَذِّبَہُم بِہَا فِى ٱلۡحَيَوٰةِ ٱلدُّنۡيَا وَتَزۡهَقَ أَنفُسُہُمۡ وَهُمۡ كَـٰفِرُونَ ﴾

(So let not their wealth nor their children amaze you; in reality Allah’s plan is to punish them with these things in the life of this world, and that their souls shall depart (die) while they are disbelievers.) (9:55), and,

﴿ لَا يَغُرَّنَّكَ تَقَلُّبُ ٱلَّذِينَ كَفَرُواْ فِى ٱلۡبِلَـٰدِ • مَتَـٰعٌ۬ قَلِيلٌ۬ ثُمَّ مَأۡوَٮٰهُمۡ جَهَنَّمُ‌ۚ وَبِئۡسَ ٱلۡمِهَادُ ﴾

(Let not the free disposal (and affluence) of the disbelievers throughout the land deceive you. A brief enjoyment; then, their ultimate abode is Hell; and worst indeed is that place for rest.) (3:196, 197).

Allah said in this Ayah (3:10),

﴿ إِنَّ ٱلَّذِينَ كَفَرُواْ ﴾

(Verily, those who disbelieve) meaning, disbelieved in Allah’s Ayat, denied His Messengers, defied His Books and did not benefit from His revelation to His Prophets,

﴿ لَن تُغۡنِىَ عَنۡهُمۡ أَمۡوَٲلُهُمۡ وَلَآ أَوۡلَـٰدُهُم مِّنَ ٱللَّهِ شَيۡـًٔ۬ا‌ۖ وَأُوْلَـٰٓٮِٕكَ هُمۡ وَقُودُ ٱلنَّارِ ﴾

(Neither their properties nor their offspring will avail them whatsoever against Allah; and it is they who will be fuel of the Fire.) meaning, they will be the wood with which the Fire is kindled and fed. Similarly, Allah said,

﴿ إِنَّڪُمۡ وَمَا تَعۡبُدُونَ مِن دُونِ ٱللَّهِ حَصَبُ جَهَنَّمَ ﴾

(Certainly you (disbelievers) and that which you are worshipping now besides Allah, are (but) fuel for Hell!) (21:98).

Allah said next,

﴿ كَدَأۡبِ ءَالِ فِرۡعَوۡنَ‌ۙ ﴾

(Like the Da’b of the people of Fira`wn.) Ad-Dahhak said that Ibn `Abbas said that the Ayah means, “Like the behavior of the people of Fir`awn.” This is the same Tafsir of `Ikrimah, Mujahid, Abu Malik, Ad-Dahhak, and others. Other scholars said that the Ayah means, “Like the practice, conduct, likeness of the people of Fir`awn.” These meanings are all plausible, for the Da’b means practice, behavior, tradition and habit. The Ayah indicates that the disbelievers will not benefit from their wealth or offspring. Rather, they will perish and be punished. This is the same end the people of Fir`awn and the previous nations met, those who rejected the Messengers, the Ayat, and proofs of Allah that they were sent with.

﴿ وَٱللَّهُ شَدِيدُ ٱلۡعِقَابِ ﴾

(And Allah is severe in punishment.) meaning, His punishment is severe and His torment is painful. None can escape Allah’s grasp, nor does anything escape His knowledge. Allah does what He wills and prevails over all things, it is He to Whom everything is humbled and there is no deity worthy of worship, nor any Lord except Him.

﴿ قُل لِّلَّذِينَ كَفَرُواْ سَتُغۡلَبُونَ وَتُحۡشَرُونَ إِلَىٰ جَهَنَّمَ‌ۚ وَبِئۡسَ ٱلۡمِهَادُ • قَدۡ ڪَانَ لَكُمۡ ءَايَةٌ۬ فِى فِئَتَيۡنِ ٱلۡتَقَتَا‌ۖ فِئَةٌ۬ تُقَـٰتِلُ فِى سَبِيلِ ٱللَّهِ وَأُخۡرَىٰ ڪَافِرَةٌ۬ يَرَوۡنَهُم مِّثۡلَيۡهِمۡ رَأۡىَ ٱلۡعَيۡنِ‌ۚ وَٱللَّهُ يُؤَيِّدُ بِنَصۡرِهِۦ مَن يَشَآءُ‌ۗ إِنَّ فِى ذَٲلِكَ لَعِبۡرَةً۬ لِّأُوْلِى ٱلۡأَبۡصَـٰرِ ﴾

(12. Say to those who disbelieve: “You will be defeated and gathered together to Hell, and worst indeed is that place of rest.”) (13. There has already been a sign for you in the two armies that met. One was fighting in the cause of Allah, and as for the other, in disbelief. They saw them with their own eyes twice their number. And Allah supports with His aid whom He wills. Verily, in this is a lesson for those who understand.)

Threatening the Jews With Defeat and Encouraging Them to Learn a Lesson From the Battle of Badr

Allah commanded the Prophet Muhammad to proclaim to the disbelievers,

﴿ سَتُغۡلَبُونَ ﴾

(You will be defeated) in this life,

﴿ وَتُحۡشَرُونَ ﴾

(And gathered together) on the Day of Resurrection,

﴿ إِلَىٰ جَهَنَّمَ‌ۚ وَبِئۡسَ ٱلۡمِهَادُ ﴾

(to Hell, and worst indeed is that place of rest)

Muhammad bin Ishaq bin Yasar recorded that `Asim bin `Umar bin Qatadah said that when the Messenger of Allah gained victory in the battle of Badr and went back to Al-Madinah, he gathered the Jews in the marketplace of Bani Qaynuqa`.

Therefore, Allah said,

﴿ قَدۡ ڪَانَ لَكُمۡ ءَايَةٌ۬ ﴾

(There has already been a sign for you) meaning, O Jews, who said what you said! You have an Ayah, meaning proof, that Allah will make His religion prevail, award victory to His Messenger, make His Word apparent and His religion the highest.

﴿ فِى فِئَتَيۡنِ ﴾

(In the two armies) meaning, two camps,

﴿ ٱلۡتَقَتَا‌ۖ ﴾

(that met) in combat (in Badr),

﴿ فِئَةٌ۬ تُقَـٰتِلُ فِى سَبِيلِ ٱللَّهِ ﴾

(One was fighting in the Cause of Allah) the Muslims,

﴿ وَأُخۡرَىٰ ڪَافِرَةٌ۬ ﴾

(And as for the other, in disbelief) meaning, the idolaters of Quraysh at Badr. Allah’s statement,

﴿ يَرَوۡنَهُم مِّثۡلَيۡهِمۡ رَأۡىَ ٱلۡعَيۡنِ‌ۚ ﴾

(They saw them with their own eyes twice their number) means, the idolaters thought that the Muslims were twice as many as they were, for Allah made this illusion a factor in the victory that Islam had over them.

It was said that the meaning of Allah’s statement,

﴿ يَرَوۡنَهُم مِّثۡلَيۡهِمۡ رَأۡىَ ٱلۡعَيۡنِ‌ۚ ﴾

(They saw them with their own eyes twice their number) is that the Muslims saw twice as many idolaters as they were, yet Allah gave them victory over the disbelievers. `Abdullah bin Mas`ud said, “When we looked at the disbelievers’ forces, we found that they were twice as many as we were. When we looked at them again, we thought they did not have one man more than we had. So Allah’s statement,

﴿ وَإِذۡ يُرِيكُمُوهُمۡ إِذِ ٱلۡتَقَيۡتُمۡ فِىٓ أَعۡيُنِكُمۡ قَلِيلاً۬ وَيُقَلِّلُڪُمۡ فِىٓ أَعۡيُنِهِمۡ ﴾

(And (remember) when you met, He showed them to you as few in your eyes and He made you appear as few in their eyes.) (8:44)”.

When the two camps saw each other, the Muslims thought that the idolaters were twice as many as they were, so that they would trust in Allah and seek His help. The idolaters thought that the believers were twice as many as they were, so that they would feel fear, horror, fright and despair. When the two camps stood in lines and met in battle, Allah made each camp look smaller in the eyes of the other camp, so that they would be encouraged to fight each other,

﴿ لِّيَقۡضِىَ ٱللَّهُ أَمۡرً۬ا ڪَانَ مَفۡعُولاً۬ ﴾

(so that Allah might accomplish a matter already ordained (8:42) meaning, so that the truth and falsehood are distinguishable, and thus the word of faith prevails over disbelief and deviation, so that the believers prevail and the disbelievers are humiliated. In a similar statement, Allah said;

﴿ وَلَقَدۡ نَصَرَكُمُ ٱللَّهُ بِبَدۡرٍ۬ وَأَنتُمۡ أَذِلَّةٌ۬‌ۖ ﴾

(And Allah has already made you victorious at Badr, when you were a weak little force) (3:12). In this Ayah (3:13) Allah said,

﴿ وَٱللَّهُ يُؤَيِّدُ بِنَصۡرِهِۦ مَن يَشَآءُ‌ۗ إِنَّ فِى ذَٲلِكَ لَعِبۡرَةً۬ لِّأُوْلِى ٱلۡأَبۡصَـٰرِ ﴾

(And Allah supports with His victory whom He wills. Verily, in this is a lesson for those who understand.) meaning, this should be an example for those who have intelligence and sound comprehension. They should contemplate about Allah’s wisdom, decisions and decree, that He gives victory to His believing servants in this life and on the Day the witnesses stand up to testify.

﴿ زُيِّنَ لِلنَّاسِ حُبُّ ٱلشَّهَوَٲتِ مِنَ ٱلنِّسَآءِ وَٱلۡبَنِينَ وَٱلۡقَنَـٰطِيرِ ٱلۡمُقَنطَرَةِ مِنَ ٱلذَّهَبِ وَٱلۡفِضَّةِ وَٱلۡخَيۡلِ ٱلۡمُسَوَّمَةِ وَٱلۡأَنۡعَـٰمِ وَٱلۡحَرۡثِ‌ۗ ذَٲلِكَ مَتَـٰعُ ٱلۡحَيَوٰةِ ٱلدُّنۡيَا‌ۖ وَٱللَّهُ عِندَهُ ۥ حُسۡنُ ٱلۡمَـَٔابِ • قُلۡ أَؤُنَبِّئُكُم بِخَيۡرٍ۬ مِّن ذَٲلِڪُمۡ‌ۚ لِلَّذِينَ ٱتَّقَوۡاْ عِندَ رَبِّهِمۡ جَنَّـٰتٌ۬ تَجۡرِى مِن تَحۡتِهَا ٱلۡأَنۡهَـٰرُ خَـٰلِدِينَ فِيهَا وَأَزۡوَٲجٌ۬ مُّطَهَّرَةٌ۬ وَرِضۡوَٲنٌ۬ مِّنَ ٱللَّهِ‌ۗ وَٱللَّهُ بَصِيرُۢ بِٱلۡعِبَادِ ﴾

(14. Beautified for men is the love of things they covet; women, children, Qanatir Al-Muqantarah of gold and silver, branded beautiful horses (Musawwamah), cattle and fertile land. This is the pleasure of the present world’s life; but Allah has the excellent return with Him.) (15. Say: “Shall I inform you of things far better than those For those who have Taqwa there are Gardens (Paradise) with their Lord, underneath which rivers flow. Therein (is their) eternal (home) and Azwajun Mutahharatun (purified mates or wives). And Allah will be pleased with them. And Allah is All-Seer of the servants.”)

http://www.recitequran.com/fr/tafsir/en.ibn-kathir/3:1 لتكملة  التفسير ادخل    go heir LIRE Tafsir 3 Ali-'Imran La famille de 'imran Ibn Kathir - Anglais…

[vicicicici-blog1]

20xx/06/30

I woke up early this morning. I could barely stay asleep to begin with, after everything that happened last night. It's never fun to wake up early on the weekend.

I went to check on him, to see if perhaps he tried to run away. I didn't hear him make a sound all night, but considering how quiet he is to begin with, I wondered if maybe he might've been able to perform some sort of sneaky vanishing act without me knowing.

Upon entering Alex's room, I found him fast asleep, laying on his back with his hands tucked in close to his face, not even stirring when I entered the room. I guess I can't exactly quantify it with experience, but I don't think I've ever seen someone look so peaceful and comfortable while sleeping as he did. I left him be, and went to check on the new benefits package.

Like the last one, this was a black bag, with the same rabbit icon and zipper, but this was was much bigger, and stuffed as full as it could get, even bigger than a backpack. Some of the booklets were the same, but in more detail about the products and contractors, like [LOL INFO DUMP AGAIN], and now, I know what that company's full name is - Future Day Neverland.

The newest stuff, however, is what I'm guessing are the new gift items, about five boxes of varying sizes, four black and one white, as well as a plain, white booklet, compared to the black magazine-like booklets that make up the rest of this pack. This booklet, with his photo and name on the cover, was the care booklet I was told about.

I put everything else in the locker, not wanting to bother with whatever random weapons and body parts might've been inside the gift boxes, and decided to take a look at the care booklet, at least to get some information about this poor kid.

It turns out I was off about his age, a little. The book lists the year of his birth. This year, though I don't know when, he turns eighteen. I remember reading that poor treatment and malnourishment can cause someone's physical development to slow. Might that be what’s happened?

He was also listed as having a Damage intake of 2, based on a scale from 0 to 10. I'm not sure what exactly that quantifies, but it also lists below that his current average fatal recovery speed (shortened to frs) is 8%. I'm guessing this has to do with them supposedly being immortal, so it makes sense that these stats would actually just be complete nonsense.

Most everything else listed is various types of diet and exercise plans, depending on how you want to care for him, as if taking care of a pet. None of the food listed is actually any different from human diets, and besides sticking to solitary activities, the exercises are no different. The main thing it constantly points out is a lack of concern for total wellbeing. On every single page, often even two or three times, it constantly notes that, really, you don't NEED to do these things, not even feed them. If they don't eat, they'll suffer from starvation, but never actually die. The same goes for if their muscles atrophy, and if they become unhealthy or stressed enough to have a heart attack, a stroke, or any fatal illness. They'll still feel it, but it will never actually kill them.

'Customization' is also listed. Apparently, the higher their frs, the harder it is to keep customization permanent. Tattoos are impossible to keep, and will eventually bleed out of their skin, and a similar issue occurs with with hair dye. Piercings will eventually be forced out by the wounds healing themselves, and forcibly trying to keeping anything forced into a wound of any size in can result in the frs increasing much faster than any other form of injury. Other things, such as contacts, are able to stay in, but also risk being forced out if left in to a point that they irritate the eye, though apparently this concern only exists if the frs is above 75%. They can wear any normal outfits, but other outfits are offered for purchase on the website.

Once I was done reading it, I threw it back in the locker. I've got everything in there organized into a neat pile, and no one other than me and my brother has access to it. Even a fire won't burn up this evidence.

It took me longer than I expected to go through all that, and I am actually currently typing this in the afternoon. The boy has yet to wake up, and I don't feel like waking up someone who looks so relaxed. Perhaps, for the time being, I'll make him a sandwich, and leave it for him to eat once he wakes up. _____________________________________________ 20xx/07/01

The boy spent all day sleeping yesterday. By the time I went back to bed myself, he was still napping. The sandwich I left there hadn't been eaten either.

Today, I managed to sleep in for a while. If I keep flipping around my schedule like this, work is going to end up hellish, and I could become careless.

When I went to go check up on him, I was surprised to find him sitting up, holding the sandwich, and eyeing it carefully, looking at it like it might be poisoned. Well, that's what he was doing for a split second - when he noticed me enter the room, he jumped, dropping the sandwich and tucking himself back into bed. I've been curious, since then... did he fake being asleep, at least at some point?

I didn't want to make him feel discomforted, so I moved the sandwich off the bed, and asked him if he'd rather eat something else. He didn't so much as move, or say anything. That's another question - can he speak English? Or any language, for that matter?

I dropped off a chocolate bar and a bottle of water in his room this time. I'm not sure if he recognizes the significance of it still being packaged, but I hope he's less reluctant about taking at least this much. I'll take him to the police station tomorrow.

I have a day off tomorrow, too. Even better.

[mrjohnhthompson]

4 Facts You Need To Know About EPF Investments Overseas

On September 13, Prime Minister Datuk Seri Najib Razak announced that the Employees Provident Fund (EPF) and Khazanah Nasional Bhd planned to expand their investments in the US. The backdrop: his diplomatic trip to meet President Donald Trump. Citing economic gain, Najib said EPF was expected to invest between US$3 billion (RM12.6 billion) and US$4 billion. “They (EPF) have got big sums of capital to be exported. They have invested close to US$7 billion in terms of equity in the US and they intend to invest an additional US$3 billion to US$4 billion to support your infrastructure re-development,” he said. Typically the announcement was met with swift backlash from social media users and opposition politicians. PKR leaders Datuk Seri Azmin Ali and Rafizi Ramli said the investments were a form of capital flight and could be better kept in the country. Najib responded that such spin of facts gave the impression that there were no returns while the truth was that much more money was brought back to the country. So as the debate rages on, we decided to get to the heart of the matter. Here are four things you need to know about EPF and its overseas investments:

1) The EPF has the right to invest abroad

Before we start jumping the gun – that the EPF is not bound by law – let’s start with the fact that the fund’s activities is subject to law i.e. the Employees Provident Fund Act 1991. It is an act “to provide for the law relating to a scheme of savings for employees’ retirement and the management of the savings for the retirement purposes and for matters incidental thereto”. And EPF’s investment activities fall under the purview of Section 26. In a reply to English-language daily The Star, the fund cited this section of the act and said it practisced a disciplined and prudent investment process. An Investment Panel approves all investment decisions and this panel consists of members appointed based on extensive knowledge and professional experience in financial matters. Here’s how the accountability structure looks like:

According to the EPF, the Investment Panel determines and approves investment activities in line with existing guidelines, policies on risk control and asset allocation. Members on the panel consist of representatives from EPF, Bank Negara Malaysia, independent industry experts and the government.

2) There are checks and balances

Aside from a quarterly audit process done internally, the Auditor-General is also tasked to keep track of EPF investments. For example, in 2014, the then Auditor-General Tan Sri Ambrin Buang urged the Public Accounts Committee to check the EPF’s growing investments overseas. Ambrin was concerned after noting that the fund chalked up RM6.46 billion in real estate investments abroad last year. This despite the healthy returns. Also, EPF’s overall asset position and performance are announced quarterly and accounts reported in accordance with global accounting standards, FRS 139. All audited accounts are tabled in Parliament for approval and is subject to scrutiny by PAC. This means all investments being pumped into overseas institutions are accounted for and tracked. In fact, the fund issued a statement right after Najib’s announcement, assuring Malaysians that all investment proposals are assessed and go through a robust due diligence process.

3) You can keep track of the EPF’s performances

The fund releases its quarterly income statements online under its News & Highlights section. This is, by far, your best bet in keeping track of EPF investments. For example, last week the fund reported an increase in quarterly investment income to RM11.51 billion for the second quarter ended June 30, 2017, which was a year-on-year increase of 36.36% from RM8.44 billion during the same period. However, there is no exact information available on its official website on the overseas institutions the fund invests in. Checks with EPF directed us to the communication affairs department and we were told to submit a written request regarding our query on overseas institutions. Still, there’s some information available in their media statement. Citing their latest quarterly income statement, the fund said its overseas investments – which account for 29% of its total investment asset – contributed to 32.5% of the total investment income during the period under review. Aside from this, members can also download and read their annual reports. So, in the latest Annual Report 2016, it states that the EPF’s diversified investments allowed it to take profits from other markets. As at December 31, 2016, the EPF’s foreign investments, which constituted 29% of total assets under management, contributed 39% of the total RM46.56 billion gross investment income. Actually, even the fund’s net impairment are also public knowledge. For example, in February 2017, EPF recognised net impairment amounting to RM8.17 billion, compared with RM3 billion in 2015. This is due to weaker equities market and a slump in crude oil prices.

4) The overseas investments does benefit its members

So over the past three years, the EPF overseas portfolio has recorded double digit annualised returns of 11.1%, boosting the overall return by 1.39%. According to EPF chief Shahril Ridza Ridzuan, 29% of the EPF portfolio invested overseas remained “a significant revenue driver” for the portfolio. He said strong gains on overseas holdings, at an annualised 11.1% for the three years through June 30, helped the portfolio more than overcome a 3% appreciation of the ringgit versus the dollar during the period.

So do you need to be worried about your EPF savings?

With all the information available, the answer is no. Sure, your dividends might be affected as investments are after all a risky affair. But to see some returns on your savings, the EPF has to look abroad to diversify its risk. The good news is there’s some measure or accountability by way of the EPF Act and the fund’s duty to publicly disclose its finances on a quarterly basis. If you are enticed by the US economy, then you can try opting for an EPF-approved unit trust that invests a certain portion into US-based assets. One such fund is the Eastspring Investment Global Leaders MY Fund which invest 54.28% of assets into the US. [table id=869 /] If the EPF’s investment adventures still nag at your conscience, then you can try saving in a Private Retirement Scheme (PRS) as well as in shares, unit trusts, REITs and other investment instruments to spread your risk. Because at the end of the day, forced savings is better than no savings at all. And it’s the lack of savings that’s the larger reality we’ll have to contend with.  

The post 4 Facts You Need To Know About EPF Investments Overseas appeared first on iMoney Malaysia.

[menkymos-blog]

Tips for Custom Framing

There are always things we like to keep that remind us of a wonderful moment in life. We cling to things and become memories, treasures, part of our journey. I have notebooks full of movie ticket stubs, restaurant napkins I kept while traveling, concert tickets, etc. I am sure that too. I still think that making a nice scrapbook or putting it in a frame is a much better way to remember that moment and to decorate my home with my most precious memories. Getting something framed should not be complicated but in my experience a simple metal poster frame or an ornate gold leaf is a different language than some. So, here are some things to keep in mind when visiting a custom frame store.

Framing can be expensive. A beautiful $ 5 print that you purchased from an overseas street artist can cost more than $ 100 to the structure. Keep in mind that not all frames are the same and not all frames are in your piece. A simple black metal frame works wonderfully with posters, but will not benefit from a delicate watercolor. Remember that you are going to -almost- frame this only once, so invest a little more and use quality materials. Preserving your piece is important. Do not commit it to your budget. Ask your professional framing professional for tips to make your piece look good and be conservative right. They will be happy to answer your questions and guide you in your choices to make sure your piece is framed correctly.

There are four main aspects to your frame: the frame itself (wood, metal, modern, ornate, etc.), glass (regular, non-reflective, UV protector, acrylic), mat if you choose to have one Acid, paper, preservation, fabric, etc.), and the materials used to seal the back of the frame (acid free, conservation). Most rack stores have implemented using only acid-free backs for all parts, but it never hurts to remember your binder that you want / need. The more prepared you are before it goes in, the easier it will be for you and the frame store professional to frame your print. Keep this in mind: the frame needs to complement the piece first, but it can be adapted to your furniture and decoration. A modern home could be removed from a gold leaf, Renaissance style, but not limited to a simple black frame. There are always good reasons to explore.

A binder that I know always said "If you are completely clueless about what to choose, a good custom frame frame shop will help. However, you will need to have a clue as to where the art could go in your house, what color Walls are, if the art will be in the sunlight and what kind of furniture you have. "The more information the framer finds useful, the easier it will be for them to help him. Custom frame shops have a lot if frame samples and sample mats for you to deal with with your print. Do not refuse to take everything on your walls, you are the one who will be seeing this every day.

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[pamphletstoinspire]

Fr. Spitzer’s Prayers in Times of Suffering, Trial, and Anxiety

In times of suffering, prayer is one of the first refuges of the faithful, but it can be hard to know where to begin. In this article, Fr. Spitzer details what prayers he uses in his own life and how they can help.

Help

The first and most important prayer in times of suffering is “Help.” We oftentimes forget it because we think it is too easy, or that God would not respond to something that simple; but if God really is Unconditional Love, and God not only hears us but wants to help us in our time of need, then the prayer “Help” should be more than sufficient to engender the heart of God toward a myriad of unexpected graces. This prayer can be further (and beneficially) specified by a variety of other prayers. I will here mention only four which have been very important in my own life.

The Hail Mary

For some reason, this prayer has not only been a foundational contemplative prayer, but also one of galvanizing grace in times of trouble. Our Blessed Mother’s consoling presence seems to be evoked (along with her help) during the most desperateof times.

This prayer, when repeated, opens upon a consolation filled at once with familial strength, a mother’s understanding, and the assistance for a “child not fully in control.” It seems to activate a providence (a conspiracy of grace) which betokens a mother’s request of her son,much like the Wedding Feast at Cana (Jn 2:1)

Countless have been the times when it has come naturally to my mind, inviting me to repeat it. Countless too, have been the times when that repetition has led to increasing peace of mind and clarity of thought. I do not know why, but it always seems to give me courage – the courage to do what is right, to face adversaries, to move ahead with unpopular plans, and to bear the possibility of defeat bravely.

Jesus intended that His family be our family, and that His Mother,be our Mother (Jn. 19: 27), and so we can believe that she would do for us everything she would do for Her Son – particularly comforting us, interceding for us, and being protectively present tous. Speaking from experience, in my times of need, I have never been disappointed by Her.

Lord, make good come out of this suffering

Sometimes trials turn into times of suffering, and sometimes suffering has neither speedy relief nor obvious meaning. At these times, it is essential to ask for the Lord’s help to optimize the good in suffering (good for oneself, good for others,good for the community, and even good for the mystical body of Christ).

Suffering can be debilitating and depressing if we do not see any good coming from it. However, if we recognize a good in suffering for ourselves, others, the culture, the community, and even the mystical body of Christ, suffering can become not only meaningful, but an invaluable companion in the life of grace, virtue, and salvation.

The above prayer has helped me to invoke the Lord’s blessings upon my suffering (and to recognize that blessing) in the deepest ways.

When I first became aware of the onset of a serious eye problem six months before my ordination to the priesthood, I was completely baffled. Fortunately, I knew that God’s providential love would be operative through this challenge throughout the rest of my life. In that faith, I began to pray,

“Lord, do not waste one scintilla of this suffering. Make some good come out of it for me (a change in life direction, a deepening of faith and love, a protection from other adversity), for others (a zeal for Your kingdom, a desire to help others, an empathy with those in need, and an eagerness to serve the kingdom), for the culture, and for the community. Lord,please optimize the good that can come from this suffering.”

The Lord has certainly answered this prayer, for He has deepened my sense of gratitude for what I do have; He has helped me to see that every day and every moment counts in manifesting His love and presence; He has made me far more circumspect about what matters and doesn’t matter; and He has deepened my appreciation for the Beatitudes and the love intrinsic to them. I frankly cannot imagine what my priesthood or apostolic zeal would be like without my challenge. But I do know this, it would be less, much less.

Offer it up

One of the great mysteries of Christian life is that our suffering can, with Christ’s, help in the redemption of others. This is best explained in Jesus’ final words on the cross, reciting Psalm 22: “My God, my God, why have You forsaken me?” Jesus, here, was not referring only to the first line of that Psalm, but rather to the Psalm in its entirety. When one reads the Psalm one notices a man who is going through a set of trials uncannily similar to Jesus’own sufferings on the cross; but more importantly, one notices that the psalmist is not discouraged by the trials being suffered.

He has a deep trust and confidence that God will use his sufferings not only for the good of the community around him, but also to bring all the nations to Himself in the future. Thus, when Jesus recited the words, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me,”

He moved beyond the note of lamentation (in the first line) to a sublime confidence that the Father would effect universal salvation through His suffering. Jesus’ passion is His free gift of self, that is, His unconditional Love. When Jesus was dying on the cross He created a “gift of self,” that is, an unconditional Love (as scapegoat, as paschal lamb, and as blood of the covenant) which He intended to give to the Father to shower down upon humanity so that all the nations might come into His kingdom of unconditional Love.

We can imitate Christ in our own limited ways by presenting our sufferings to the Father asa “gift of self” (love) for the Father to shower down upon humanity as a grace to strengthen andunify the mystical body of Christ. Every moment of suffering is a potential for a gift of love(grace) to be showered upon humanity in its need. All we need do to convert suffering into gracefor the world is to offer it up to the Father as our gift of self.

When I was a child, I would complain to my mother about various things that had gone wrong at school, and she would say, very matter-of-factly, “Offer it up.” My general reaction was, “I’m always offering it up, and no good seems to come from it.” It only occurred to me years later that the offering was not intended to be a direct benefit to me, but rather a benefit for the world and the kingdom — which would eventually become my life’s purpose and passion.

By offering up my sufferings to God, I turn it into self-sacrifice – into gift of self – which Jesus taught is “love for the life of the world.” When I offer my suffering as a self-offering (act ofl ove) to the Father, and ask Him to make it a source of grace for those who need it, I know that He will do this – just as He did it for His Son.

In this way the negativity of suffering turns into the positivity of self-offering, love, and grace. My mother used to say, “Mothers know everything.” In this particular case, that would be true.

I give up, Lord. You take care of it

Sometimes life gets out of control. No matter how hard we try to obviate free fall or to figure ourselves out, life’s circumstances seem to get the better of us. It is at these moments that I recommend the above prayer which I have put to great use throughout my life.

I recall my discovery of this prayer in Rome back in 1980.

I had been sent to the Gregorian University to take all of my theology classes in Italian. I went to Italy two months early without any background in Italian to attain “fluency.” I was reasonably confident after studying the language in Perugia for two months that I would be able to understand my classes.

My first class on the first day was an exegesis class on the Gospel of Matthew taught by a Spanish professor who spoke Italian faster than the Italians (with a Spanish accent). I was not able to understand twenty-five percent of what he was saying, and began to panic. I kept thinking to myself (in my unqualified ignorance) that I was going to “go down.” What would I say to my Provincial? To my classmates? “Here I am, back in the United States. I couldn’t understand anything and I flunked out.”

Needless to say, I began to feel considerable discomfort. Realizing that circumstances were quite out of my control, I muttered, “I give up, Lord. You take care of it!” When I said this it seemed like steam came out of my ears. A pressure was relieved by simply giving it over to the Lord who could providentially bring some good out of my predicament. As a matter of fact, He did. The moment this prayer enabled me to calm down, I became content with understanding partial sentences and concepts. I could then begin to make sense out of the general line of thought, which, in turn, built my confidence, and, in turn, enabled me to understand more.

As the semester progressed, I began to understand far more of what the professor was saying, and eventually made it to the final exam where the professor gave two or three choices of questions for various passages of Scripture. I was able to choose questions that pertained to the last parts of the course, thereby hiding my inadequate understanding of the first part. In the end, I did quite well. (Thank You, Lord!)

Evidently, much of that success is attributable to my natural gradual appropriation of the Italian language and exegetical method, but much of it, in my opinion, was due to the composure and openness to the content induced by my trust in the Lord of love. That trust was galvanized through the above simple prayer, “I give up, Lord. You take care of it.”

Lord – Push Back the Foreboding and Darkness

Foreboding is a complex phenomenon.

Some of it can come from feelings of anxiety and depression which our conscious or unconscious psyche projects into the future—so it is internally, psychologically induced. To those, who like myself, are not materialists, there is another side to foreboding — a genuine premonition about darkness or evil in the future. I am uncertain about the cause of such premonitions—whether they are a warning from God, harassment from an evil spirit, or a kind of psychic protention — intrusion — into an impending future.

They could be the result of two or three of these causes. Whatever the cause, I believe that foreboding is not completely psychological — and that it does portend some kind of future darkness. I believe this for the simple reason that most of the time I experience it, something dark does in fact happen a few days later. It contains not only a sense of darkness, but powerlessness toward the darkness, and resembles the descriptions of it by prophets (like Jeremiah, Ezekiel, and Isaiah) — mythologists (like Thomas Malory and J.R.R. Tolkien) and litterateurs (like Sophocles and Shakespeare).

When these premonitions are accompanied by the feelings of powerlessness and anxiety — I refuse to entertain them. I give them over to the Lord immediately by saying the simple prayer, “Lord, push back this darkness and foreboding.” I even use my hands to gesture pushing back against something tangible and palpable — while I repeat the prayer, “Lord, push it back.”

Since I’m fairly sure that something dark or harmful is about to happen to me, I also use this follow-up prayer — “Lord, take care of the dark situation which is about to befall me —please protect me, and minimize the harm that may come to me.”

I frequently repeat that prayer until the foreboding begins to subside. Most of the time, the foreboding does subside. It does so in stages — first, it loses its bite and intensity, then it gradually weakens, and finally after some time,a sense of normalcy or even consolation occurs.

I can think of only a few occasions when the sense of normalcy-consolation did not occur —though the sense of foreboding decreased considerably.

Conclusion

I recommend that readers use these prayers to get started on the life and adventure of transcendent grace, purpose, and happiness. They will be both an indispensable support and a passageway to even deeper faith and prayer. When you feel called to a deeper relationship with the Lord, I would recommend using two resources:1. Five Pillars of the Spiritual Life: A Practical Guide to Prayer for Active People(Ignatius 2008).2. Finding True Happiness: Satisfying our Restless Hearts (Ignatius 2015).These two resources will help you to develop three other kinds of prayer:

Contemplative prayer

Transformational prayer (called the “Examen Prayer”), and

A primer on how to follow the inspiration and guidance of the Holy Spirit (including a summary of “St. Ignatius’ Rules for the Discernment of Spirits”).

Catholics will want to become more deeply aware of the significance of the Holy Eucharist according to Jesus – this can be found in Five Pillars of the Spiritual Life as well as another resource, God so Loved the World: Clues to our Transcendent Destiny from the Revelation of Jesus.

The power, peace, and communion of this gift of the Lord at the Last Supper cannot be underestimated.

Written by: Fr. Robert Spitzer

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A Padre Pio Inspirational Story

The Clergy Remembers Padre Pio – Part III

Fr. John Esseff, while on a pilgrimage to Rome in 1959, decided to make a detour to San Giovanni Rotondo and visit Padre Pio. His friend on the pilgrimage, Fr. Robert was going to accompany him. As far as Fr. John knew, at that time, there were only two individuals living, who had the stigmata – Padre Pio who lived in Italy and Therese Neumann who lived in Germany. In 1959, Padre Pio was a controversial figure. Some people said that he had been banished from the priesthood, that his stigmata was self-inflicted, that he could no longer hear confessions. Others believed him to be a living saint, a man in touch with God. Fr. John was of the second opinion.

Fr. John had a small grasp of the Italian language and while in Rome, he was able to understand it to a limited degree. But when he left Rome for Padre Pio’s monastery, all of that changed. He was not able to understand even one word of the Italian language that was being spoken. Someone was able to foresee the problem of the language barrier because he was given some helpful advice. When he and Fr. Robert arrived in San Giovanni Rotondo they were told simply to say the words, “Maria Pyla” to the first person they saw and they would be sure to be directed to the home of Mary Pyle. Mary Pyle was Padre Pio’s American secretary and she greeted the pilgrims and offered hospitality to the many visitors who came to see Padre Pio. She often helped people find lodging who were staying for a time in San Giovanni Rotondo.

When Fr. John and Fr. Robert stepped off the bus in San Giovanni Rotondo, the words “Maria Pyla” drew an instant response. They were directed to Mary’s home, which was very close to Padre Pio’s monastery. They received a warm welcome from Mary and she invited them to dinner. Padre Pio’s nephew joined them for the meal.

As they were eating dinner, the front door opened and Padre Pio walked in. Needless to say, Fr. John was very surprised. Padre Pio looked directly at Fr. John and said, “Why are you here? Are you one of the curiosity seekers?” “No, not at all,” said Fr. John. “I am a believer.” Padre Pio walked over to the left side of the table where Fr. John was sitting and spoke to him for a few minutes. Then he turned and left. Fr. John was so surprised by the visit that he asked Mary about it. “Does Padre Pio come to your house often?” he asked. Mary understood that Fr. John had received a special blessing and that the experience was meant for him and for no one else. Mary said to Fr. John, “Padre Pio had something special for you. He sometimes does that. None of the rest of us saw him.”

Fr. John tried to take it all in. For those minutes when Padre Pio was talking to him, Fr. John was somehow not present to the others at the table. Mary Pyle understood and Padre Pio’s nephew understood but Fr. Robert did not. He was completely mystified. “I find the whole experience that happened at dinner spooky,” Fr. Robert said. “I don’t know what to make of it.”

The next morning, in order to get to Padre Pio’s 5:00 a.m. Mass, the two priests got up in the middle of the night. They got to the church at 2:30 a.m. where a huge crowd was already gathered. When the doors opened, the two priests went into the sacristy. About 200 men were already assembled there. When Padre Pio walked through the sacristy, all of the men knelt down. Padre Pio stood right in front of Fr. John and in silence, stared at him. His expression was solemn, almost angry. Everyone looked at Padre Pio as he looked at Fr. John. This went on for what seemed like an hour but Fr. Robert told Fr. John that Padre Pio stared at him for about 15 minutes.

Padre Pio made his way with difficulty through the crowd, to a kneeler where he paused to pray before vesting for Mass. When he finished his prayers and passed through the sacristy again, he once more stopped in front of Fr. John. This time, however, he had a beautiful smile on his face. He had removed his gloves and Fr. John could see the stigmata. There was light passing through the wounds on his hands. The stigmata appeared transparent. Fr. John bent down and kissed his hand and then Padre Pio put his hand on Fr. John’s head in a blessing.

The Mass of Padre Pio was an unforgettable experience. The church was filled to capacity and although his Mass was long, the time passed quickly. Fr. John noticed that after the Mass, the local Italian people took dabs of cotton and touched it to the floor by the altar. There were bloodstains around the altar and it was gathered on the cotton as relics.

Fr. John wanted to make his confession to Padre Pio, but Padre Pio’s assistant, Fr. Dominic Meyer told him it would not be possible. The confessions were booked solid for two weeks in advance. However, Fr. Dominic told Fr. John that he would speak to Padre Pio about him. A short time later, Fr. John received a letter from Fr. Dominic. Padre Pio had sent a message saying that if Fr. John ever needed his help while hearing confessions, to send his guardian angel to Padre Pio and he would help him immediately. Padre Pio added that if he needed help for any other reason, just to send his angel, and he would respond at once.

In the years since his visit to Padre Pio, Fr. John Esseff (now Msgr. Esseff) has kept very busy in his priestly ministry. He has traveled worldwide and has given retreats to the Missionaries of Charity in Lebanon, Haiti, Italy, the U.S., India, and more. He was very close to Mother Teresa and while in India, he served as a confessor and retreat director to her and her religious community. He was appointed director of formation at the seminary in Fargo, North Dakota and at Creighton University he has served as spiritual director for formation of priests and seminarians. He is the creator of Telespond, a program which addresses the needs of the elderly and he has been an advocate for the handicapped, the retarded, the poor, the homeless, and the migrant farm workers. For 12 years he served at the Lackawanna County Prison as a counselor and chaplain to prisoners and their extended families. For his many contributions to humanity, he has received the Pope John Paul II award, “Prelate of Honor.”

In June of 2007, Msgr. Esseff celebrated his 79th birthday. He has been a priest for 54 years. He continues to serve as a retreat master and spiritual director for bishops, priests, and seminarians. He has never forgotten Padre Pio’s words, “Just send me your guardian angel if you ever need my help,” words spoken almost 50 years ago. As a confessor and spiritual director, Msgr. John has needed Padre Pio’s help and guidance on many, many occasions. Frequently, when faced with a difficult case, not knowing the right words to say or the best advice to give, he has sent his angel to Padre Pio. The answer has always come. He continues to send his guardian angel to Padre Pio and has felt Padre Pio’s ever-present help through these many years. ________________________________

Memories of Padre Pio

Fr. Joseph Anthony shared a close friendship with Padre Pio. Five years older than Padre Pio, Fr. Joseph Anthony lived side by side with Padre Pio at the monastery of Our Lady of Grace for four years. When Fr. Joseph Anthony was transferred to the monastery of St. Anne in Foggia, his health began to decline. On December 30, 1936, Padre Pio received the news that Fr. Joseph Anthony was gravely ill. His condition had grown steadily worse and he was close to death.

Padre Pio’s prayers were requested. He lifted up his prayers to Heaven, begging God to come to the aide of his friend. What Padre Pio did not know was that Fr. Joseph Anthony had passed away on that very night. While Padre Pio was praying, he heard a knock at his door. When he opened the door, to his great surprise, there stood Fr. Joseph Anthony. “What are you doing here?” Padre Pio asked him. “I was told that you were in a great deal of pain and were gravely ill. I have been praying for you.” “I am well,” said Fr. Joseph Anthony. “All my pains have gone away and I have come to thank you for your prayers.” Saying that, he vanished. It was then that Padre Pio understood that his friend had already passed away. When Padre Pio told the Capuchins about his experience, Fr. Raffaele suggested to him that he was probably dreaming. Padre Pio explained that it was not a dream. He was wide-awake and Fr. Joseph Anthony appeared at his door in flesh and blood. The friary records stated that Fr. Joseph Anthony had passed away at 2:00 a.m. That was the same time that he had visited Padre Pio. ________________________________

Fr. Bernardo d’Alpicella had contracted malaria one summer, and even though he was receiving very good medical care, there was no improvement in his condition. Every two days, his fever would return. His doctor told him that it would be a good idea for him to have a change of climate. Perhaps his health would benefit from the change. Acting upon his doctor’s advice, Fr. Bernardo decided to make a visit to San Giovanni Rotondo. However, his condition showed no improvement and the fever remained. One evening Father Bernardo was in the dining room with the friars and Padre Pio. He said, “Padre Pio, will you give me a blessing? I mean one of those strong ones!” The moment that Padre Pio blessed him, the fever disappeared. ________________________________

Egidio Vagnozzi (1906-1980), a Catholic priest for 52 years, served as a Bishop for 31 years, the last 13 of those years, as a Cardinal. At one time he was designated Apostolic Nuncio to the Philippines, and it was at this assignment that Bishop Vagnozzi encountered many serious problems within the church. The responsibilities of his office and the complex issues he faced each day weighed on his mind. While in Rome, he spoke to the Holy Father, Pope Pius XII and asked for advice. Pope Pius XII encouraged Bishop Vagnozzi to visit Padre Pio in San Giovanni Rotondo and speak to him about the matter. The bishop found the advice hard to understand. Padre Pio never left his monastery and although not technically a cloistered monk, for all intents and purposes, he was. He did not have any training in diplomatic matters. Living in the remote and isolated town of San Giovanni Rotondo, he was not in touch with the real world. How could he possible offer Bishop Vagnozzi any advice?

After thinking it over, the bishop decided to make the trip. He did not tell anyone of his plan to visit Padre Pio as it was his desire to maintain a low profile. When he arrived in the small town of San Giovanni Rotondo, no one recognized him as a bishop. No one in this remote area in southern Italy had ever seen him before. At the monastery of Our Lady of Grace, upon meeting Padre Pio, Bishop Vagnozzi was very surprised to hear Padre Pio greet him with the words, “Hello, Your Excellency.” He was shocked. How did Padre Pio know that he was a bishop?

The bishop confided to Padre Pio the many problems he faced as Apostolic Nuncio. With great kindness, Padre Pio said to him, “Your Excellency, you are the Apostolic Nuncio for the Philippines. Is that correct?” He answered, “Yes.” “Who was it that sent you to the Philippines?” “It was the Holy Father who sent me,” the bishop answered. “Well, who is the Holy Father?” The bishop replied, “The Holy Father is the Pope, the Vicar of Christ.” Padre Pio said, “So then it was Our Lord Jesus Christ who sent you to serve the church in the Philippines. You are a representative of the Pope but you are also a representative of Jesus Christ. If Christ were to go to the Philippines and see all the problems and abuses that you have shared with me, what would He do? Whatever Christ would do, that is what you must do.” The bishop returned to Rome and told Pope Pius XII what Padre Pio had said. The Holy Father told the bishop to take to heart the wise counsel that had been given to him. When he went back to the Philippines, he thought about Padre Pio’s advice and acted upon it. Everything turned out very well. ________________________________

Padre Pio’s methods in the confessional sometimes seemed drastic, but they were effective. On occasion, Padre Pio applied a bit of “shock treatment,” by sending the person out of the confessional without absolution. This acted as a wake up call for many. The young man in the following story received one such wake up call and it changed his life.

Father Mariano Paladino, one of the Capuchins in San Giovanni Rotondo, was approached on one occasion by a young man from the northern part of Italy. The young man confided to Father Mariano the many burdens that were in his heart. He was going through a particularly difficult religious crisis and many other problems were weighing on him. After listening, Padre Mariano suggested to the young man that he speak to Padre Pio.

Acting upon the advice, one day the young man went to confession to Padre Pio. But before he could utter even one word, Padre Pio said to him, “I want you to answer either yes or no to the questions that I ask you. Only that and no more.” Padre Pio then began an examination of conscience. One by one, he named a list of serious sins, inquiring as to whether the young man had committed them or not. Much to his embarrassment, the young man had to answer yes to every sin that Padre Pio had named. After this humiliating experience, Padre Pio then told the young man that he should leave the confessional, that is, without absolution. The young man was devastated and began to cry. He cried for three days.

But something impelled him to return to the monastery and so he did. He managed to position himself at a place where Padre Pio was passing by. As he was standing there, he perceived a wonderful fragrance of perfume. The young man assumed that Padre Pio was wearing after-shave cologne.

When he went back to his hotel, he saw a photograph of Padre Pio on the wall. The penetrating gaze of Padre Pio’s eyes was so striking that the young man had to tightly close his own eyes. When he opened them, the photo had disappeared. He asked one of the employees at the hotel about the picture. He was informed that there had never been a picture of Padre Pio hanging on the wall. The young man then realized that Padre Pio’s presence was with him and he began to deeply ponder the encounter he had with Padre Pio. After regaining his peace, he decided to go back to the monastery and visit Padre Pio once again. Again, he made his confession to Padre Pio and he spoke to him about his life’s direction. The young man was able then to act on his desire. He became a Catholic priest. ________________________________

In September 1955, Padre Alberto D’Apolito along with 45 others, made a pilgrimage to the shrine of Our Lady of Tears in Syracuse, Sicily. Padre Alberto invited Padre Pio to accompany them but he declined the invitation. He almost never left the monastery. “Go on ahead. I will stay in San Giovanni Rotondo but I will follow you,” Padre Pio said. He meant that he would be praying for Padre Alberto and his companions while they were away.

On the way to the shrine, they drove through a large area of watermelon farms. In the warm September sunshine, the watermelons looked delicious and so the pilgrims asked the bus driver to stop. Unable to resist the temptation, the pilgrims ate too many of the watermelons. They began to suffer terribly from indigestion and nausea. Fortunately, they were all feeling better by the next day. They visited the beautiful shrine of Our Lady of Tears and then went on toward Palermo. Just as it was getting dark, on a lonely and desolate stretch of countryside, they came to an obstruction in the road. The bus driver stopped and told everyone to get out of the bus. The people became frightened and began to pray to Padre Pio. All at once, a wave of perfume filled the bus. When another wave of perfume passed through the bus, everyone understood that it was Padre Pio and that his presence was with them. They got out of the bus and began clearing away the fallen trees and rocks that were blocking the road. Just then, the Italian State police officers (the Carabenieri) arrived. They told the police officers that they had been praying for Padre Pio’s protection. At the mention of Padre Pio’s name, the police officers all removed their hats as a gesture of respect. “When you see Padre Pio again, please ask him to pray for us,” they said. “As police officers, our lives are exposed to constant danger.”

Padre Alberto received confirmation that Padre Pio had indeed been watching over them on their journey. As he entered the monastery, Padre Pio greeted him and said, “You all made fools out of yourselves with those watermelons!” And then he added, “And that night on the road to Palermo, you were all so frightened. What a scare!” ________________________________

Padre Pietro Tartaglia left this very beautiful reminiscence of Padre Pio:

“I can see him today as he appeared to me when I was a youngster. It was beautiful to see him there in the silence of his cell when we Capuchin aspirants went to him for confession. The dim light gave a mystical touch to his emaciated but radiant countenance. Near him was a photograph of his mother who had died a short time before, and a little statue of Our Lady. He spoke about her to us and taught us to love her. At a certain hour he used to walk in the friary garden, absorbed in his sufferings and his love while the beads slipped through the fingers of his wounded hands. And how full and ardent was his voice when he recited the Angelus with the others – in the garden, in the choir, or at the window. Who could fail to be moved by the sight of him as he walked with painful steps towards the altar for evening devotions and in a voice breaking with emotion recited the Visit to Our Blessed Lady.” ________________________________

Padre Pio had a great love for the religious habit. He lived in the time when the Capuchins had a habit they wore in the daytime and a night habit which they wore to bed. When Padre Pio became ill, the Superior of the monastery did not want him to wear his habit at night. However, Padre Pio was not in favor of any change in this regard. Only an order could convince him of it. So the Superior gave Padre Pio a dispensation from wearing the habit to bed, in favor of pajamas. Padre Pio started crying upon receiving the news. On the night that he died, September 23, 1968, knowing that his end was at hand, he went and put on his habit. He wanted to give his soul back to God, wearing his religious habit. The following story shows Padre Pio’s deep respect for the habit:

One time when Padre Pio was hearing confessions in the sacristy of the church, he kept looking intently toward one particular man who was in the confessional line. The man noticed it and began to feel very uncomfortable. He moved to another place and tried to remain inconspicuous, but Padre Pio’s penetrating eyes still followed him wherever he went. All of the people nearby noticed it as well and were quite curious as to why Padre Pio was staring at the man. Finally, Padre Pio motioned for the man to come over to him. The man thought there was some mistake and so he did not move. One of the men who was standing nearby told him, “Padre Pio is calling you. You must go to him.” Although nervous, the man approached Padre Pio’s confessional. In a soft voice, just above a whisper, Padre Pio said to him, “Father, go and put on your habit then come back and I will hear your confession.” The man was a Dominican priest. He had come to San Giovanni Rotondo because he had heard much talk about Padre Pio. It seems the opinion was evenly divided. Some people believed that Padre Pio was a living saint and others did not. The man wore civilian clothing because he wanted to find out for himself the truth about Padre Pio. His experience convinced him that Padre Pio was truly authentic.

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Prayers In Times Of Suffering, Trial, And Anxiety

In times of suffering, prayer is one of the first refuges of the faithful, but it can be hard to know where to begin. In this excerpt, Fr. Robert Spitzer details what prayers he uses in his own life and how they can possibly help you.

Help

The first and most important prayer in times of suffering is “Help.” We oftentimes forget it because we think it is too easy, or that God would not respond to something that simple; but if God really is Unconditional Love, and God not only hears us but wants to help us in our time of need, then the prayer “Help” should be more than sufficient to engender the heart of God toward a myriad of unexpected graces. This prayer can be further (and beneficially) specified by a variety of other prayers. I will here mention only four which have been very important in my own life.

The Hail Mary

[Hail Mary, Full of Grace, The Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou among women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now, and at the hour of our death. Amen.]

For some reason, this prayer has not only been a foundational contemplative prayer, but also one of galvanizing grace in times of trouble. Our Blessed Mother’s consoling presence seems to be evoked (along with her help) during the most desperateof times.

This prayer, when repeated, opens upon a consolation filled at once with familial strength, a mother’s understanding, and the assistance for a “child not fully in control.” It seems to activate a providence (a conspiracy of grace) which betokens a mother’s request of her son,much like the Wedding Feast at Cana (Jn 2:1)

Countless have been the times when it has come naturally to my mind, inviting me to repeat it. Countless too, have been the times when that repetition has led to increasing peace of mind and clarity of thought. I do not know why, but it always seems to give me courage – the courage to do what is right, to face adversaries, to move ahead with unpopular plans, and to bear the possibility of defeat bravely.

Jesus intended that His family be our family, and that His Mother,be our Mother (Jn. 19: 27), and so we can believe that she would do for us everything she would do for Her Son – particularly comforting us, interceding for us, and being protectively present tous. Speaking from experience, in my times of need, I have never been disappointed by Her.

Lord, make good come out of this suffering

Sometimes trials turn into times of suffering, and sometimes suffering has neither speedy relief nor obvious meaning. At these times, it is essential to ask for the Lord’s help to optimize the good in suffering (good for oneself, good for others,good for the community, and even good for the mystical body of Christ).

Suffering can be debilitating and depressing if we do not see any good coming from it. However, if we recognize a good in suffering for ourselves, others, the culture, the community, and even the mystical body of Christ, suffering can become not only meaningful, but an invaluable companion in the life of grace, virtue, and salvation.

The above prayer has helped me to invoke the Lord’s blessings upon my suffering (and to recognize that blessing) in the deepest ways.

When I first became aware of the onset of a serious eye problem six months before my ordination to the priesthood, I was completely baffled. Fortunately, I knew that God’s providential love would be operative through this challenge throughout the rest of my life. In that faith, I began to pray,

“Lord, do not waste one scintilla of this suffering. Make some good come out of it for me (a change in life direction, a deepening of faith and love, a protection from other adversity), for others (a zeal for Your kingdom, a desire to help others, an empathy with those in need, and an eagerness to serve the kingdom), for the culture, and for the community. Lord,please optimize the good that can come from this suffering.”

The Lord has certainly answered this prayer, for He has deepened my sense of gratitude for what I do have; He has helped me to see that every day and every moment counts in manifesting His love and presence; He has made me far more circumspect about what matters and doesn’t matter; and He has deepened my appreciation for the Beatitudes and the love intrinsic to them. I frankly cannot imagine what my priesthood or apostolic zeal would be like without my challenge. But I do know this, it would be less, much less.

Offer it up

One of the great mysteries of Christian life is that our suffering can, with Christ’s, help in the redemption of others. This is best explained in Jesus’ final words on the cross, reciting Psalm 22: “My God, my God, why have You forsaken me?” Jesus, here, was not referring only to the first line of that Psalm, but rather to the Psalm in its entirety. When one reads the Psalm one notices a man who is going through a set of trials uncannily similar to Jesus’own sufferings on the cross; but more importantly, one notices that the psalmist is not discouraged by the trials being suffered.

He has a deep trust and confidence that God will use his sufferings not only for the good of the community around him, but also to bring all the nations to Himself in the future. Thus, when Jesus recited the words, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me,”

He moved beyond the note of lamentation (in the first line) to a sublime confidence that the Father would effect universal salvation through His suffering. Jesus’ passion is His free gift of self, that is, His unconditional Love. When Jesus was dying on the cross He created a “gift of self,” that is, an unconditional Love (as scapegoat, as paschal lamb, and as blood of the covenant) which He intended to give to the Father to shower down upon humanity so that all the nations might come into His kingdom of unconditional Love.

We can imitate Christ in our own limited ways by presenting our sufferings to the Father as a “gift of self” (love) for the Father to shower down upon humanity as a grace to strengthen and unify the mystical body of Christ. Every moment of suffering is a potential for a gift of love(grace) to be showered upon humanity in its need. All we need do to convert suffering into grace for the world is to offer it up to the Father as our gift of self.

When I was a child, I would complain to my mother about various things that had gone wrong at school, and she would say, very matter-of-factly, “Offer it up.” My general reaction was, “I’m always offering it up, and no good seems to come from it.” It only occurred to me years later that the offering was not intended to be a direct benefit to me, but rather a benefit for the world and the kingdom — which would eventually become my life’s purpose and passion.

By offering up my sufferings to God, I turn it into self-sacrifice – into gift of self – which Jesus taught is “love for the life of the world.” When I offer my suffering as a self-offering (act ofl ove) to the Father, and ask Him to make it a source of grace for those who need it, I know that He will do this – just as He did it for His Son.

In this way the negativity of suffering turns into the positivity of self-offering, love, and grace. My mother used to say, “Mothers know everything.” In this particular case, that would be true.

I give up, Lord. You take care of it

Sometimes life gets out of control. No matter how hard we try to obviate free fall or to figure ourselves out, life’s circumstances seem to get the better of us. It is at these moments that I recommend the above prayer which I have put to great use throughout my life.

I recall my discovery of this prayer in Rome back in 1980.

I had been sent to the Gregorian University to take all of my theology classes in Italian. I went to Italy two months early without any background in Italian to attain “fluency.” I was reasonably confident after studying the language in Perugia for two months that I would be able to understand my classes.

My first class on the first day was an exegesis class on the Gospel of Matthew taught by a Spanish professor who spoke Italian faster than the Italians (with a Spanish accent). I was not able to understand twenty-five percent of what he was saying, and began to panic. I kept thinking to myself (in my unqualified ignorance) that I was going to “go down.” What would I say to my Provincial? To my classmates? “Here I am, back in the United States. I couldn’t understand anything and I flunked out.”

Needless to say, I began to feel considerable discomfort. Realizing that circumstances were quite out of my control, I muttered, “I give up, Lord. You take care of it!” When I said this it seemed like steam came out of my ears. A pressure was relieved by simply giving it over to the Lord who could providentially bring some good out of my predicament. As a matter of fact, He did. The moment this prayer enabled me to calm down, I became content with understanding partial sentences and concepts. I could then begin to make sense out of the general line of thought, which, in turn, built my confidence, and, in turn, enabled me to understand more.

As the semester progressed, I began to understand far more of what the professor was saying, and eventually made it to the final exam where the professor gave two or three choices of questions for various passages of Scripture. I was able to choose questions that pertained to the last parts of the course, thereby hiding my inadequate understanding of the first part. In the end, I did quite well. (Thank You, Lord!)

Evidently, much of that success is attributable to my natural gradual appropriation of the Italian language and exegetical method, but much of it, in my opinion, was due to the composure and openness to the content induced by my trust in the Lord of love. That trust was galvanized through the above simple prayer, “I give up, Lord. You take care of it.”

Lord – Push Back the Foreboding and Darkness

Foreboding is a complex phenomenon.

Some of it can come from feelings of anxiety and depression which our conscious or unconscious psyche projects into the future — so it is internally, psychologically induced. To those, who like myself, are not materialists, there is another side to foreboding — a genuine premonition about darkness or evil in the future. I am uncertain about the cause of such premonitions — whether they are a warning from God, harassment from an evil spirit, or a kind of psychic protection — intrusion — into an impending future.

They could be the result of two or three of these causes. Whatever the cause, I believe that foreboding is not completely psychological — and that it does portend some kind of future darkness. I believe this for the simple reason that most of the time I experience it, something dark does in fact happen a few days later. It contains not only a sense of darkness, but powerlessness toward the darkness, and resembles the descriptions of it by prophets (like Jeremiah, Ezekiel, and Isaiah) — mythologists (like Thomas Malory and J.R.R. Tolkien) and litterateurs (like Sophocles and Shakespeare).

When these premonitions are accompanied by the feelings of powerlessness and anxiety — I refuse to entertain them. I give them over to the Lord immediately by saying the simple prayer, “Lord, push back this darkness and foreboding.” I even use my hands to gesture pushing back against something tangible and palpable — while I repeat the prayer, “Lord, push it back.”

Since I’m fairly sure that something dark or harmful is about to happen to me, I also use this follow-up prayer — “Lord, take care of the dark situation which is about to befall me — please protect me, and minimize the harm that may come to me.”

I frequently repeat that prayer until the foreboding begins to subside. Most of the time, the foreboding does subside. It does so in stages — first, it loses its bite and intensity, then it gradually weakens, and finally after some time,a sense of normalcy or even consolation occurs.

I can think of only a few occasions when the sense of normalcy-consolation did not occur — though the sense of foreboding decreased considerably.

Conclusion

I recommend that readers use these prayers to get started on the life and adventure of transcendent grace, purpose, and happiness. They will be both an indispensable support and a passageway to even deeper faith and prayer. When you feel called to a deeper relationship with the Lord, I would recommend using two resources:

1. Five Pillars of the Spiritual Life: A Practical Guide to Prayer for Active People (Ignatius 2008).

2. Finding True Happiness: Satisfying our Restless Hearts (Ignatius 2015).These two resources will help you to develop three other kinds of prayer:

Contemplative prayer

Transformational prayer (called the “Examen Prayer”), and

A primer on how to follow the inspiration and guidance of the Holy Spirit (including a summary of “St. Ignatius’ Rules for the Discernment of Spirits”).

Catholics will want to become more deeply aware of the significance of the Holy Eucharist according to Jesus – this can be found in Five Pillars of the Spiritual Life as well as another resource, God so Loved the World: Clues to our Transcendent Destiny from the Revelation of Jesus.

The power, peace, and communion of this gift of the Lord at the Last Supper cannot be underestimated.