#but i don't know my owm mind

[photomatt]

mrrroww! meow~~~ meme~~ meow- owme woem meow mrrrow?

nya ~~~

Lol! I don't speak cat, though I've had feline friends my entire life, they're still inscrutable to me. In terms of translating language, though, my mind was pretty blown by this new HeyGen AI technology:

[moonlightguardianmoon]

Why has the internet been so depressed over tragic gay men lately? Like- from what I've on the internet so far, is tragic gay men in either pirate theme, time traveling interdimensional multiverse non-sence, to biblical characters stoping Armag-NOPE, getting tragic over a simple miscommunication over something the other said and taking it too in deep over what the other actually means- OR because both wish to understand each other on a personal level, so they try and become something for the other on both ends OR try to do something to make improvements for their lives to work out for the two so they could leave in some form of peace, Sometimes they don't even realise they're gay (or they just decided to add it in the last minute so they could get more fans to see their faith ship come true (kind of)) but ultimately end up being a giant miley cyrus, size wrecking ball and wreck everything! All because of a simple miscommunication from both parties! Like- BOY YOU KNOW THAT NOT WHAT HE MEANT! Because both men are just sharing a single brain cell, and they have to take turns sharing said one brain cell. Usually, one man has the brain cell longer than the other but is still an emotional and social fool. The other just big head empty most of the time, but has their far share of "Eureka!", moment, also usually the one who realizes everything first despite the other being the keeper of their shared brain cell. Also, the other just like wearing black- not because their egdy or "tragic tragic" its just because they like the look and hot topic was a good choice. The other is just a fancy pants who likes books and enjoys just living life as is with their respective partner and just want to have one simple day with them without some kind of looming threat over their head and is also the one who secretly is the "Actual body gard of the two" (sometimes), Bro all I'm saying is, is that there some werid trend going on here in the show business. Is this where humanity has led to now? Just gay men being tragic in every conceivable timeline and / or interdimensional universe in every multiverse!? Like, I'm not complaining, but bro, this is too much tragic for me to take in man. Do you have any idea how much my heart has been broken seeing all these tragic gay men? Makes me kind of want to write my owm story about two tragic gay men being tragic! Like MIGHT AS WELL! EVERYONE ONE ELSE DOING IT! Maybe I'll give them a dog or something? Like, maybe I'll give them a 200 year old being with the fresh mind of a child just wanting to do their best- or maybe a nearby guy who's so wholesome for his own good- Or MaYbE I'Ll JuSt GiVe tHeM a cReW oN sHiP wHo aRe jUsT LiKe- "Oh ya we're totally fine with this." (Have yet to watch ofmd but you never know) Bro, I'm just losing my mind right now over this! Apparently, this trend of gay men make me crazy- CRAZY!? I WAS CRAy once! They locked me in an internet page- an internet page full of gay men! Gay men make me crazy- CRAZY!? I WAS CRAZY ONCE-! Bottomline is I forgot where I was going with this, and uuuuh sometime gay men are just an angel and a demon trying to be on their own side. Sometimes it's a pirate and a noble guy trying to live life on the sea, sometimes a god of mischief and some office worker for the multiverse and timeline who both don't even know their in love to begin with... or Marvel is just trying to hop on the tragic gay men train before it fades, just like when Thanos snapped half the universe, Disney also faded along with it.

[dayandnightitsjustlife]

dude i couldn't tell you shit about the back of my hand, that saying is garbage

[bumblesimagines]

We All Have Secrets

Part 2

Request: Yes or No

TW: Homophobia, transphobia, biphobia

~

(Y/N) opened the fridge, taking out the orange juice. Maria watched him with a small smile, head resting on her fist as she took in the smell of bacon and eggs.

"I love having an aspiring chef as a boyfriend." Maria cooed, giggling softly as she watched him. (Y/N) chuckled, pouring her a glass of juice and placing it infront of her.

"These are the basics everyone knows how to do." (Y/N) reminded, turning off the stove and putting the plate infront of her. He sat across from her, handing her a fork. (Y/N) looked at his phone, picking it up and answering the call from Isabela.

"Yeah?" He asked, getting a bacon strip and taking a bite.

"Remember the hacker shit? Natalia, Raul, and Gerry were the assholes who betrayed me. They chose me." Isabela told him, huffing lightly. (Y/N) heard Isabela zipping up her bag. (Y/N) looked at Maria, licking his lips. Maria blinked, eyes widening as she stared at something on her phone.

"The hacker asked if I wanted revenge." Isabela said softly. (Y/N) put down his fork, rubbing his forehead as he sighed.

"Let's talk more at school. I'll see you there." (Y/N) said, hanging up and going on instagram. He saw the posts from the hacker, watching them. (Y/N) scoffed as he watched Pablo's video.

"What a piece of shit." He whispered, scrolling down to Natalia's video. Maria put her phone down, gaze flickering from place to place. She quickly ate and finished her juice, standing up and going to (Y/N)'s bedroom.

"Princess?" (Y/N) called out, standing up and following her. Maria glanced at him, changing out of (Y/N)'s clothes and into some clothes she had left behind from previous visits and nights over.

"I-I should be there for Natalia. God knows what she might be going through." Maria said, picking up her bag. (Y/N) nodded, changing as well and grabbing his keys.

"Come on." He smiled softly, grabbing her hand. They left the house, getting into (Y/N)'s car and driving to school. Maria's leg bounced from nerves. She anxiously nibbled on her bottom lip, looking out the window.

"Who do you think is Hunny Bunny?" (Y/N) asked, staring at the road. Maria blinked and turned her head, looking at him. Her lips parted as she shrugged.

"I'm not sure." She breathed out. (Y/N) hummed, a sigh leaving him as he shook his head. He drove into the parking lot, pulling into a spot and getting out. He could hear people talking about the videos, wrapping an arm around Maria's shoulders as they headed inside. Maria immediately spotted her sister, quickly approaching her and giving her a hug.

"What they said.. Wasn't true, right?" Maria asked, pulling away and placing her hands on Natalia's shoulders. Natalia scoffed, rolling her eyes and pushing Maria's hands away.

"Of course, Maria." She crossed her arms, glancing at the other students. (Y/N) noticed Isabela walking in, heading towards the lockers.

"I'll see you in class, gorgeous." (Y/N) said, pecking Maria's temple and jogging over to Isabela. He caught up to her, gently grabbing her arm. Isabela turned her head, noticing him and sighing softly. She pulled him into a classroom, arms crossing as she leaned against a desk.

"Natalia, Gerry, and Raul were behind it. I can't believe them! They sacrificed me to save their owm asses." Isabela shook her head, tapping her foot on the ground. She bit her bottom lip, eyes watering.

"They were supposed to be my friends. I wouldn't have saved my ass. I would've had my own secret revealed to save them. I guess the truth's out. Natalia's a thief, Rauls dad is a corrupted politician, Gerry's gay, and Pablo is a cheater." Isabela shook her head, sighing deeply. She looked at (Y/N), eyes softening.

"I know you love Maria. You can stick by her and Natalia-"

"No, Isa. I've known you longer than any of them. I love Maria but she'll support Natalia like always. I'll support you. You know Maria supports you as well. She just doesn't want to hurt her sister." (Y/N) shrugged lightly, running a hand through his hair. He placed a hand on Isabela's arm, giving it a gentle squeeze.

"You'll always have my support, Isa. Don't listen to what these nosy fuckers have to say." (Y/N) said, pulling her in for a hug. Isabela hugged him back tightly, sniffling softly. They pulled back and gave each other smiles. Isabela took out her phone to check her makeup, making sure it wasn't running.

"You're the person I can trust." She mumbled, fixing her hair. They headed to class when the bell rang, entering and getting their lab coats. (Y/N) sat down beside Maria, gaze briefly locking with Javier. He looked away, sighing softly. The classroom was mostly silent, tension high in the air. A lot of things had been revealed over the span of two days.

"Jeez, why is everyone so tense? The only who should be tense is Natalia." Rosita said, chuckling as she motioned towards the irritated girl. The boys snickered, earning glares from Natalia. Isabela didn't spare Pablo a glance, simply looking forward. Maria glanced at (Y/N), reaching over and taking his hand. The teacher, Gabriela, walked in, greeting the class as she walked towards the front. She noticed the silence and sighed.

"Look, I know all of us are a little nervous after what happened but let's try to stay focused in class today, alright?" Gabriela looked over them.

"Let's start by brainstorming ideas for the science project." She tugged on the bottom of the projector, letting it rise to reveal a drawing on the whiteboard with 'Pablo's giant dick' next to it. Snickers spread across the classroom. Gabriela scoffed, beginning to erase it. Pablo got up to help, mumbling things under his breath. Isabela rolled her eyes, tapping her pen on the table. (Y/N) snorted quietly, earning a nudge from Maria.

"You've never seen one that big?" Pablo asked, dusting off his hands and looking at the others.

"Why are you doing it? Why not let her do it? It's her dick." Gerry said, motioning to Isabela. (Y/N)'s small grin dropped, sitting up and glaring at Gerry.

"Shut the fuck up, Gerry." (Y/N) sneered. Maria gave his hand a squeeze, shaking her head lightly. Isabela scoffed and raised her hand.

"Gabriela, can I change partners? I don't want to work with Pablo." Isabela said. Gabriela nodded.

"You can work with Natalia. Maria can work with Pablo-"

"I don't want Natalia either." Isabela crossed her arms, avoiding Natalia's stunned gaze. "Can I work with (Y/N)?"

"Isa! I already told you I didn't steal anything!" Natalia huffed, frowning and glaring at her classmates. Gerry raised his hand, looking serious.

"Can I make a suggestion?"

"What is it?"

"I think Alex, (Y/N), and Ismael should work together. They'd make a diverse and open-minded project." Gerry said, shrugging as students laughed. Isabela stood up from her seat, walking towards Gerry. Gerry quickly stood and backed up.

"Isabela! My name's Isabela, asshole." Isabela snapped, glaring at Pablo when he got between them. (Y/N) got up, walking towards Gerry and grabbing him by the collar.

"(Y/N), baby, calm down!" Maria stood and went after her boyfriend, pulling on his arm. She glanced at Javier who tried pulling him back as well. Isabela pushed Pablo back, stepping away from him.

"(Y/N), let him go. Do it this instant." Gabriela ordered, glancing at Isabela and Pablo. (Y/N) let him go, turning and looking at Isabela as she pushed Natalia back as well.

"Don't touch me!" Isabela glared at them, continuing to back away from them. Gerry was pushed away from (Y/N) by Gabriela to keep them apart.

"Calm down your bunny, dude!" Gerry told Pablo. Isabela scoffed, eyes watering as she rolled her eyes. Gerry feinged surprise, hand covering his mouth.

"Oh my god. That's right! Ismael isn't your bunny, right?" Gerry asked. Isabela grabbed a testing tube, throwing it at Gerry with a frustrated scream. Gerry ducked, letting it shatter behind him. The classroom went silent.

"And that's Ismael!" Gerry laughed as Gabriela grabbed him, pushing him towards that door.

"That's enough! All of you to the principals office!" Gabriela shouted at them, pointing towards the door. Isabela took off the lab coat, tossing it to the side and leaving the classroom. (Y/N) followed after, walking out of the classroom. Natalia, Pablo, Gerry, and Javier followed after.

"Miss-"

"You stay here, Maria." Gabriela breathed out, pushing her red curls away from her face as she panted softly.

(Y/N) plopped down beside Isabela, hands in his pockets. He sat up and scooted closer to her when Javier sat beside him. Javier noticed, jaw clenching but he stayed silent.

"That's one way to skip class." (Y/N) muttered, tilting his head back. Isabela sighed, arms crossed and shoulders tense. Lulu, Quintanilla's secretary, looked over them with a disapproving head shake. They silently waited to be called into Quintanillas office. Sofia joined them, sitting beside Javier. Quintanilla opened his door, motioning to Pablo. Pablo pushed himself off the wall, entering his office. (Y/N) scoffed at the flirtatious look Lulu gave him when he passed by her.

"I always knew she had a loose screw." (Y/N) mumbled, toying with his hoodie strings. Isabela glanced at him, lightly shaking her head.

"Bet it's drier than the Sahara down there." Isabela mumbled with a small grin, earning a chuckle from (Y/N).

"(Y/N), can we talk later?" Sofia asked after leaning forward. (Y/N) looked at her, nodding. He glanced at Javier before looking forward again. Sofia shifted her gaze onto Isabela. The two quietly spoke before Isabela was called in. Sofia stood and took her spot, giving (Y/N) small smile.

"It's been a while since we've hung out." Sofia said quietly. (Y/N) licked his lips, shrugging as he gave her a small grin.

"Yeah, we haven't had a depressing conversation on the roof in forever." They chuckled. Sofia smiled and sighed, running a hand through her short hair. (Y/N) wrapped his hoodie string around his finger, gaze drifting to the ground.

"What do you want to talk about?" (Y/N) asked, brows furrowing. Sofia looked at him, licking her chapped lips. She glanced at the others, leaning in slightly.

"The hacker's identity." She explained quietly. (Y/N) hummed, nodding slowly. He glanced at Javier when he stood up to get a cup of water.

"I don't think you'd do something like this." Sofia said, giving him a small smile. (Y/N) looked at her, cocking a brow.

"And why not? Am I not smart enough to be a hacker?"

"Yeah, basically." Sofia nodded, laughing when (Y/N) scoffed and gently pushed her. He looked up when Isabela left the office, letting the door slam behind her. She mumbled things under her breath as she passed by. Javier sat down, watching her walk away. Quintanilla called for Natalia but Lulu reminded him of a meeting.

"Luis mom is here cause her son's backpack was peed on." Lulu explained. (Y/N) immediately looked at Gerry, scoffing and shaking her head.

"You've got to be a certain type of breed to pee on people's stuff like an animal." (Y/N) said under his breath, leaning forward and resting his arms on his knees. Natalia entered Quintanillas office as Sofia stood up to get water. (Y/N) stared up at the ceiling as he waited to be called. Natalia quickly rushed out of the office, earning odd looks.

"(Y/N), come in." Quintanilla called, nodding inside.

"Finally." (Y/N) whispered as he stood, walking into his office and sitting down. He rested his arm on the armrest, watching Quintanilla sit down.

"I'm surprised to see you here. You're usually a well behaved student. Now, I know Isabela is a good friend of yours-"

"Is Gerry gonna face any consequences? What he's doing can be considered bullying." (Y/N) cut him off, tilting his head. Quintanilla licked his lips, giving a small nod.

"Well, as far as I'm aware, this is a one time occurrence." Quintanilla shrugged.

"With Isabela, maybe. What about Luis? Gerry and his ass kissers always bully him. They peed on his fucking backpack. You would've made time for his mom. What kind of principal lets a bully get away with no consequences? Oh, wait... I know. The type who just wants to suck up to the parents of the rich kids. You know, I really hoped you were better, Quintanilla. You're just as incompetent as Lulu." (Y/N) shook his head, looking towards the window. Quintanilla cleared his throat.

"Where is this attitude coming from?"

"From exhaustion. When Luis finally snaps and does something stupid or Gerry decides to impress his friends by doing a shitty thing, it'll be entirely on you." (Y/N) stood, chair scratching loudly against the floor. He walked towards the door, opening it and grabbing the door handle. He pulled on it, making it slam loudly. (Y/N) dug his hands into his pockets, walking away. He glanced at the four remaining, giving a small shrug.

"Today's a great day." He grinned, heading downstairs. (Y/N) blew a raspberry, walking towards a water fountain. He drank some water, leaning back and wiping his mouth with his sleeve. He looked at Maria as she approached him. She wrapped her arms around him, gazing up at him.

"(N/N), what happened? What did you talk about?" Maria asked, frowning. (Y/N) shrugged, wrapping an arm would her waist and walking beside her.

"We talked about conversing before escalating things." (Y/N) replied, giving her a small smile. Maria relaxed, leaning against him and wrapping an arm around his waist.

"Isa probably already told you but Nati stole her phone and let the hacker have it." Maria said softly, still in disbelief.

"I can't believe my sister is not only a thief but a terrible friend." Maria looked up at him, giving his side a squeeze. (Y/N) looked down at her, smiling softly.

"I'm thankful I got with the better sister." (Y/N) grinned, laughing softly. Maria rolled her eyes playfully, giving him gently.

"Maria, I need your help!" The couple looked at Natalia with furrowed brows. Natalia looked between them, a frown on her face.

"Help me look for my purse. I think I left it in science class but.. I-I don't know." Natalia grabbed Maria's hand, pulling them along. (Y/N) sighed, letting go of Maria when they entered the science classroom. The three searched for Natalia's bag.

"How do you lose a pink bag?" (Y/N) asked, glancing under some seats. Natalia shrugged, continuing to frantically search.

"I'm not sure." Natalia breathed out. (Y/N) dusted off his hands on his jeans, standing beside Maria. The two watched Natalia, sharing a glance.

"It'll appear again, Nati. We need to focus on the Nona thing." Maria reminded as she faced her. (Y/N) wrapped his arms around her from behind.

"Maria, focus. Do you know how much that purse costs?" Natalia asked, frustrated. Rosita entered the classroom, letting a grin slip.

"Are you okay, Nati?" Rosita asked, tilting her head. Natalia spun around to face her.

"No! My purse is missing!" She huffed. Maria sighed, leaning back against (Y/N). Rosita clicked her tongue, pouting.

"Too bad they stole your purse. I'm sure you had to save up a lot for it." Rosita said, the fake pity clear as day. Natalia looked at her, slowly approaching her.

"You know where it is?" She asked quietly.

"What's the matter with you? Not everyone is like you." Rosita said. She grinned widely, blowing her kiss.

"See you around." She turned and walked away.

"Fucking bitch!" Natalia screamed after her, earning a look from Maria. (Y/N) chuckled, shaking his head and looking away when Natalia glared at him. He pecked the top of Maria's head before stepping away from her.

"So, where else have you been?" (Y/N) asked, tilting his head. "Maybe you left it somewhere else."

"I already checked my locker and the lunchroom. Rosita fucking stole it. She's such a bitch." Natalia muttered. (Y/N) took out his phone when it vibrated, looking at the text.

Javier W.

We need to talk.

[raindrop-on-a-spiderweb]

Just like back then

Richie remembered smells.

Many psychologists and psychiatrists, etcetera, bloviated about vision and taste and touch, and how it related to POST TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER.

That was what they called it. Not Shell Shock. Not Battle Fatigue. post traumatic stress disorder. A pussy hippie word invented by white-coated Harvard professors, who would never know what it was like to fire a shell into the skull of a man, or beat him to death with a rifle. Who would never feel the sear of honorable Agent Orange against his face.

It smelled like blood and mud and the unbearable humidity of the jungle.

***

Richie's hair brushed against his bare shoulders. He wore an olive tank top, his dog tags hanging proudly between his pectorals and glinting in the Florida sun.

A Range Rover slowed down and pulled over in the grassland up ahead. Richie approached, flipping his hair. He smelled the blacktop of the asphalt, stinging his sinuses as he appraised the vehicle.

The car had a They Can't Trick Our Dick bumper sticker. Dick's jowly face stared at him from the bumper, peeling and grinning. Mom had voted for Dick, hadn't she? She would, of course.

The man poked his head out of the cat. He was fleshy, stretched out like a bag of suet. His head was like the tip of a penis, all bald and wet in the sun.

"You need a ride, kid?"

The man's tongue went out to minutely lick his lips as he said kid. Richie stared at his owm reflection in the rearview mirror as he approached. Small faced, faggot faced. Girly. He had his mother's round face, soft and plump-cheeked. Those green eyes his father had cooed over as he cupped his son's face between his soft hands and worked his thumbs over his cheeks. 

"Sure do, cowboy. Headed to Miami." Richie bit his lip subtly as he eyed up the car driver, and within a moment he was in the passenger seat.

They rode onto the highway, and the chickenhawk looked over at him, still sweating. "What are you doing hitching this way?" He said, as foreplay. Richie smiled.

He remembered fleeing the house in Sicily. All of his brothers and sisters. He remembered his first friend that he had met on the bus over to Vietnam. He remembered his friend's guts falling out of him in the first bombardment. 

He remembered the woman. The Vietcong woman with her dark eyes. As he leveled the gun at her, all his mind screamed was that her eyes were just like his father's.

Richie tucked a lock of hair behind his ear and smiled at his driver. 

"Just got tossed around, I guess."

The flat green plains were giving way to palm trees. The skeletons of cigar factories rose above the heavy inland swamp that approached the black asphalt like the legs of a spider.

The far horizon was darkening behind the vast skyscrapers of Miami, dyeing the black steel purple and red.

The chickenhawk pulled over on a dirt road. 

"You know, kid, you owe me something too."

Richie knew what was coming, and knew with a bitter triumph how much his mother would have hated it. That spurred him to lean over the obese man and open his fly.

The trees covered them in a dark veil. Richie could see the distant glimmers of stars over the ocean as he sucked and bobbed on his erection.

The man's face was distorted and tense, his chest heaving as Richie worked between his thighs.

He didn't know when the slight man drew out a hammer from his back pocket.

***

Richard Winslow never thought of his life as blessed, although his mother did. When he won the Purple Heart, Patience put it right on their flawless, polished mantle, above the doctorates and awards of her other children. She had always seen him with a different eye. You look just like my father, Richie.

Not Riccardo, his given name. But Richie. A softly-spoken endearment from the lips of his mother.

***

Richie swung the hammer once. A crater erupted in the man's sweaty forehead.

The man barely had a chance to squeal or gasp. Richie aimed for his hippocampus, slamming the length of rusted iron between his eyes. He slammed it until his skull fractured into a thousand shards and his throat spasmed in gurgles.

He wished the chickenhawk had a bitch with him. Then he could hear her squeals while he shoved his hammer into her eye. And he could pretend that she was his own mother.

When Richie was done with him, his head looked like a soft sack of mushed tomatoes. His brains were dripping over the back of the car seat. His hands were still clenched over the leopard-print steering wheel. He was looking forward to a weekend in Miami, wasn't he? But Richie would be taking his place this time.

Richie got out and opened the driver's side door. He dragged him to the thick canal beside the road, where refuse and rainwater drained. He tossed him in. His bloated white body sunk immediately, and a dozen yellow eyes fixed on it. Dark green tails of alligators swished towards him.

Richie wiped his prints off the wooden handle and tossed it in after him. Then he shoved his hands in the pockets of his camouflage pants and headed back onto the road.

The beaches of Miami were right within his reach.

***

This is very much a remnant of a sequel I planned. 

TW and stuff, this is the 70s. I'm tired poor and busy and I don't really care anymore.

[zuffer-weird-girl]

Prison break, another chance

You followed the guard with a stoic face plastered on your features, feeling the slight movement of your overcoat almost floating behind you as you walked through the cells of tartarus...

"Have to say miss, have no idea how ya can keep coming in here after what he done so far." The only answer you gave it to the guard was a shrug before readjusting the beak mask on your face with a cough.

Honestly, how Kai could breath and hold this thing...?

You stopped just when the guard did, bowing his head in respect and showing it with his palm at the place where you should enter.

You thanked him and closed the door, seating down on a chair, waiting for the man himself to appear.

Chisaki was brought by a guard, physical form easing up a bit at seing your presence on the room. The guard who brought him dismissed himself and told you two that you had only half a hour before abruptly closing the cell.

"You didn't showed up for the past weeks." He whispered, dissapointment and hurt present on it as he pushed his chair to sit on with his new robotic arms. "And your eyebags grew..." he pointed our coldly, feeling like he was shotted at the fact that you weren't looking at him... more interested on your hands placed on your lap.

"Of course they grew, think having the love of your entire fucking life imprissioned in tartarus is the best thing that let me sleep at peace?" You said angrily as you controlled the burning feeling of your eyes before breathing in slowly to look up at him... numbly.

He opened his mouth to say something but nothing came out... now his owm head hanging low. Metalic hands now interviewed together ass he rested his forehead on them.

".. you found my mask and now you're using it. Intriguing." He winced mentally at hearing your scoff, glancing back at you to found you had crossed your arms over your chest. "What's the deal? Why such attitude?"

You let out a bitter chuckle, averting your eyes from him for a bit before looking onto his eyes again.

"What was that thing again you said once to me? Our relationship is based on 'trust'?" You leaned up a bit to look at him deep on his eyes "How longer did you hide the girl and experiments from me Chisaki?"

He gagged... he freaking gagged.

Hearing his surname falling from your lips in such a... hurt and betrayed tone of voice made him feel... worse than he was already.

Not only he ruined the whole yakusa, left his father figurine on a coma, but also left his lover... his angel whose he so desperately didn't want it involved.

"Angel, it was-"

"For a better cause? Keep your words, please." You leaned back on your chair with a huff, checking the time on your wristwatch, boucing your leg a bit.

"(Y/n)..." he breathed out, not knowing anymore what he could do to ease your feelings since he was mentally panicking...

He couldn't lost you too... please don't do this. Just listen to him.

You looked at him, raising one of your eyebrows up.

"It was to retribuite his kindness, it was to return this sick world back to normal, bring the yakusa back from the shadows, you got to-!"

You lift yourself from your chair, starung him down, his mask covering half of your face made difficult to him to see how you were feeling...

Although he did saw your eyes... which pierced his chest by the way you looked at him.

"You lied to me Chisaki. You hided this from me and also got arrested, most of the yakusa was... have any idea how hurt I am and how difficult this is for me?" He widened his eyes at seing one silent tear drop from your eye.

"I-" he got interrupted by some beeps coming from your wristwatch, you widened your eyes a bit and returned the chair to the inicial place.

"Angel, it didn't reached half a hou-"

"I have some things to do." You walked towards him and looked at the camera apprehensively.

"(Y/N)... please." He almost begged while reaching his metal hand to grip on your clothing, refusing to accept that his lover was getting out of here before the time stabilized... getting away from him with absolutely hatred.

"Good bye. Chisaki." Just before he could even get up you whispered onto his ear before grabbing onto his hand.

'Run as fast as you can'

He arched one eyebrow, golden eyes puffy red but yet refusing to let go of any tear before he almost jumped at the sound of explosion.

"NOW!" you shouted while dragging him out of the cell.

While running, your free hand came up to your ear, pressing onto some device that only now he had noticed.

"KURONO AND IRINAKA JUST GET IN POSITION! GET RIKIYA TO RETREAT FROM THE ATTACK!" you shouted.

Kurono? Irinaka?

What?

He tried to formulate words before the same guard that had lead him to the chat room vlicked you two from the way.

"BITCH YOU'RE COMING WITH ME!" You let go of Chisaki's hand to dodge and pushed Chisaki out of his attack while in one quick and gracious movement you crouched down to give the man a sweep and then spin again in the air to kick the poor security guard's jagular, making the poor guy unhurt, but completely knocked out.

You quickly stole his gun and hold it close to you.

Chisaki was absolutely out of words... his angel just did that? THAT?

You heard shouts from guards and Nemoto and Tengai's, cursing under the mask yiu got up again and looked around to see if any guards were coming up.

"Kai come on!" You shouted as you mentioned for him to follow you.

His metal hand grabbed onto your shoulder and spun you around, disbelied and confused golden eyes staring you down.

"Kai we have to go!" You almost shouted while letting out ome or two tears.

"What did you do?" He asked hushed, not caring about the loud sirens and shouts coming from everwhere.

"Dumbass we're taking you out of here!" You almost cried, gripping onto his metal wrist.

"Why? You ruined your life with this! HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT ARE YOU RISKING?!" he shouted, feeling his own eyes watered as he shook your shoulders slightly.

"YES I FUCKING AM! IM SAVING THE ASS OF THE MAN I LIVE FOR AND LOVE! WHAT ABOUT IT?! I AM THE BOSS OF THE YAKUSA FOR NOW SO LISTEN TO ME FOR ONCE KAI CHISAKI!"

"I WON'T LET YOU RUIN YOUR WHOLE LIFE FOR HAVING ME BACK IDIOT!" you two turned your heads at heating the amount of sounds of guards running, you two intestantly going up for the fire exit.

"You ruined my life already Chisaki Kai!" You said between muffled breaths, Chisaki widening his eyes and feeling a hreat griff and sorrow corrupt his soul... until you looked from your shoulder to him, with teary but he could tell that how your cheek bones had raised up that you were... smilling. Smilling for him.

"You ruined my life for getting out of it... so I am getting my devil back." You kicked the door open, smilling widely behind that mask at seing the helicopter.

"KURONO! IRINAKA!" You shouted at the top of your lungs, shortly after seing the ladder that Hari throwed from up above.

"HoP On FuCkInG IdiOTs!" Mimic yelled as he down at you both, both him and Hari smirking.

"How the hell did you got these two idiots out of prison?" Chisaki asked in disbelief as he stared up with wide eyes.

Tengai and Nemoto passed through you two and quickly climbed up to the machine, Tengai saying something about 'be quick boss' to you as he pushed himself up.

You placed your feet up before notocing that Chisaki didn't make any movements to follow you.

"Kai?" You asked before yelping at feeling you were being pushed away from the building "WHAT THE HELL IRINAKA?! KAI IS STILL HERE! KURONO TELL HIM TO STOP!"

"WE HAVE TO GO! THE COPS ARE GETTING CLOSER!" Hari shouted back.

"TiCK FUcKInG ToC BettEr HOp FucKinG On!" Mimic yelled while he curswd loudly at seing the cops getting closer....he had to lift up.

You widened your eyes in horror, before looking at Chisaki with pleadind and esperate expression.

"Please! KAI!"

"I don't deserve this..." he murmured as he hearded the shouts of the cops coming to him... "My angel got into this... I ruined everything, lost everything..."

"KAAAAIII!" You shouted at the top of your lungs, extending your hand desperately at him... waking him up from his self deprecating thought as he widened his eyes at the scene above him.

His angel crying out and extending her hand to him... for him to grab it.

He swallowed the air stuck on his throat...

~

"I bet he only needs time for him to understand that whatever it is your method will work, Kai... be a little pacient." You cooed sympathetically, hesitantly placing a hand on his shoulder and carresing it sweetly.

His gloved hand came to grip on yours as his head still lung low as he stared at the outside.

"Maybe if I talk-"

"No." He breathed out, slowly pushing your hand away from his shoulder to bring you to a close hug "I told you. Its business stuff... you don't need to worry about it... I just..."

"You want to repay him for taking you in." You smiled as he squeezed you to him tighter "Kai, even if you don't want to tell me becaus eyou worry about my mental health or something..." you pushed his chest a bit far away to look up at him with a sweet smile.

The way the city and the shiny sky lights reflect on your beautiful eyes were just... fascinating to him.

"I'm always by your side. Chisaki Kai. Even if the whole world burns down."

~

While your words echoed in his mind his legs moved onto their own, running at the end of the building.

Grab on her hand. Granb it-!

Just as he took one last step he jumped as high as he could, clenching his jaw and extending his right metalic arm in your direction.

GRAB IT AND NEVER LET GO AGAIN-! NEVER MAKE HER FEEL THIS WAY YOU DID IT ONCE-!

Your hands connected, you cried out loud a happy and relieved sound.

"Thank God!" You cried as he stared you up, golden wide yet relieved eyes piercing your soul.

Chrono shouted in glee before pushing you two up along with Rikiya. Just as you two got in you let go of his hand to grab onto a device, a small box with a button that you had pressed onto it and gave it to Rikiya.

"You know what to do big guy." He nodded in agreement and threw it just above Tartarus, exploding into a wide and huge puff of purple smoke.

"Wha-"

"It will erased their minds of the current event... I placed a hologram on your cell that's exactly a replic..." you said while taking off the mask with a relieved sigh.

You guys were in the ground in minutes, everyone jumping off with victorious shouts at the fa t they just broked into Tartarus.

"ThE YaKUSa Is BaCK AgAIn BiTChEs!" Mimic yelled witha fist on the air.

"HELL FUCKING YEAH!" Kurono shouted along just when Kai had jumped out of the helicopter and offered his hand to help you down.

"You brought not only them, but all the precepts of death back." He mumbled in disbelief.

"Almost. Bitch Rappa stayed fucking behind." You mumbled before you giggled.

Tengai bowed along with Nemoto.

"Thanks to miss (Y/n) sama we got the honor of getting you back master Overhaul."

Setsuno smirked alomg with his three commurates nodding in agreement.

"Be proud dude. Your girlfriend was the one who took us out of our prison and brought the yakusa back up again." Chrono commented while wiping the sweat on his forehead.

Chisaki almost let out a sob as he looked at your smilling self, offering him his plague mask.

"I cleaned Kai... sorry! Ovedhaul."

He looked at the mask before shoving it away to brought you to a crushing hug. Not only surprising you but the whole gang as well.

"The greatest blessing that I will have on my whole life is having you..." he parted from your hug to wiped one tear away from your eye "my dear angel as my partner..."

"Cheesy shit." Mimic got punched from Chrono for that.

You touched foreheads together for one last time, before Chisaki darkened his eyes and looked at mens.

"The Shie Hassaikai is back from the shadows." He said numbly.

"And thank god im not the leader anymore..." you sighed with a giggle, smilling widely at the brighest look you saw from your boyfriend.

He had hope again.Chisaki Kai was back. Not Overhaul.

Kai. Your Kai Chisaki was back.

[juyeonbot]

"Rich people are so amusing." Rolls my eyes at you. Before walking away. After a few weeks, everything seem normal. You weren't bothering me, I wasn't acknowledging you were there. It was almost perfect, which it was. "You know, you seem really cool you wanna come to our party thos sunday?" Hm, why is everyone in this school so damn flirty. "Nah I'm okay, I gotta study for our quizzes next week." I said to the boy offering me. You can tell Juyeon was listening in at your conversation as he chuckled a bit after you rejected him. "Did that guy trip on something because why on earth would he flirt with you.", "Can you mind your owm business Juyeon. Are you that interested with me?" He looked at me with an intense gaze before saying "HA! Me? You must be kidding yourself. Why would I like you?", "Oh really." I scooted closer to him not caring about other people inside the class. Going close to his ear. "Sure, Juyeon. I know you want me. If you didn't. Then why are you practically falling apart when I do this." I sucked at the nape of your neck slightly, Juyeon trying to hold his moans. "See." You turned your head to look me in my eyes, lust filling them. "Meet me after this." I chuckled. "Sorry I have to study. Besides, you don't like me right?" Before I got to move my sit away from you, you grabbed my waist and this time you were the one who whispered in my ears. "Afterclass, don't make me repeat myself.", "Not until you admit you got the hots for me." I said. "After fucking class, you think you can just do that without any consequence? Get ready for a ride, you started a war."

As you said I met up with you afterclass. "Wow you're such a gentleman bringing me into your apartment. Is this all daddys money hmm?" You didn't answer. "If you aren't gonna say something, I'd rather leave. We have quizzes next week. And I am not gonna waste my time here." I was close to the door before you pulled me back to your chest, capturing my lips with yours right away. I was responding to you right away. The kiss was intense, you were kissing me like I was your life source. Pulling me closer and closer. Tounges dancing together. Before finally letting my lips go. Panting and gasping for air while looking into each others eyes. I chuckled before talking "Guess I won." - 😈

“😒 technically you didn’t. You’re the one that said agreed. But whatever. I’m curious, why’d you even decide to come over if you hate me so much? I just wanted to play with you is all. You didn’t have to be so rude. Now why don’t we continue that kiss.”

juyeon/byeol/??

[rishabhbs]

'Just write what you feel like. Your best thoughts.' This happens to be quite a bad pseudo advice i usually give myself. I can't just write anything i feel like. Let's just say it's not pretty enough. But 'pretty is not the price you pay to exist in this world' right? my own way of feeling about things. let alone those feelings. And how i 'over'think all of this. I like simple things, i guess everyone does. Like when someone shows POVs of life while talking about trees and air conditioners. Or missing places you visited only once. Does that make sense? And is that sufficient?

It never starts off good for me. Like a chaos of randomness and I'll try to weave sentences only to realize i am some alien with no hands. Random. Just like that. I get a lot of "i once read somewhere" thoughts. Even though putting them into something I'm going to call "mine" just feels wrong. But then i think every thought we have was most probably something we heard or read somewhere. Maybe even this one. I've read somewhere our mind picks up things mostly when we are not paying attention. Fine. I haven't. I made that up.

Overthinking. the way it's romanticised. I think about it, a bit too much at times. The cute race between "my overthinking is so bad" and "who tf asked". I guess it was the last thing millennials found to flex about. After depression and anxiety, of course. I ask people what they 'over'think about. The answer is always, concisely, people. For me overthinking is when you try to think twice at once. If that makes sense. Thinking more isn't overthinking. Is it? Maybe. Let's not overthink this.

Happiness. Let's just slow down, take a deep breath, before we dive into intellectual thought processing about how happiness lies in little things and it is, in some way, a cheat code to life. The way people explain it. For me it's like those stories you learn as a kid. One for which you're not given any context, character development, plot or storyline, separately. One where you don't ask if the rabbit had irregular sleeping patterns or the turtle was on drugs. You just take your moral lesson and spend the rest of your life not knowing what to do with it like the rest of us. Respect the drill.

Maybe it's all about finding that one line from some Netlfix show which typifies how you you are. Or finally creating something so intellectually good no human could possibly reflect their owm insecurities on it. Or just making everyone happy.(lol). okay fine. Making a few people really happy. Or just doing something jiska tutorial YouTube par nahi hai. Like sleeping on time. Or not bragging about your coffee addiction. Or just being kind.

[mali121216]

Sunday 19th June @ 0155h

Tonight was so hard Ali. For the first time since we met, I'm in Melbourne for a reason that's not you...

To get to the city we drove down Williamstown Road, the road that leads to home, the road I would always get slightly disappointed about seeing because it meant we were right around the block from home, so I'd have to stop holding your hand on my leg, or stop snuggling my head into your arm, it meant that we would no longer be alone side my side in the safe and private little bubble that was your car. Fuck did I take those moments for granted. I mean the disappointment was there, but I knew once we went inside I could still come distract you while you were gaming, or you'd eventually come upstairs and cuddle up to me in the bed... the disappointment was always only ever fleeting. But now, fuck Ali, now I'd give anything for more of those simple but tender moments driving home in your car.

It was so hard driving by so many all too familiar places, places I had come to call home over the past 5 years, places that held so many memories of you and I together. Everyone else in the car with me was so oblivious to the anguish these seemingly trivial things were causing me.

As the night went on it only got harder, not only was everyone in the group coupled, but we were also at a bingo rave, it was so exactly like the one you and I went to together, we were so happy that night, we laughed and sang and danced, a night to remember from yet another event I'd happened to stumble across and organized for us.

My mind kept switching between replaying bittersweet memories of us, and thinking of how much I want to tell you about all the funny or wild moments of the night. I still yearn for you to be the one person I tell everything to. I miss being each others' human diaries.

The more we ventured around the city after bingo, the more I found you everywhere I looked. This entire state is stained with the image of you and our love. It hurt so bad I wanted to cry. I contemplated getting in an uber and just showing up at your house. I know I'd have to call you to not seem like a psycho, but honestly the temptation to just show up and let myself in to your room was insane. If it weren't for the fact that that would make me seem psycho I would have done it.

I know that house like the back of my hand. I know the code to the key lockbox on the fence by the bins is your and Serkan's birthdates, I know how to get through the door without letting it make a sound, I know what spot of the floor on the landing at the top of the stairs makes the squeaky noise, I could find my way into bed beside you even if I were completely blind... your room... our room... the mattress we bought together...

I'm so scared that you're lying about having shifts this weekend. That the truth is you never had work today, you just didn't want to pick me up from the airport, and you don't really have work tomorrow, you just don't want to see me. The idea of that kills me. I keep questioning whether or not I should ask annè for coffee in the morning, I would love to see her, but also, I wish I could know the definitive truth.

I can't imagine how I'd be if the truth were that you're avoiding me, and you're infact dating someone else, Hollie maybe... fuck why could she not have another name. You used to call me by my full name all the time. You would smile that beautiful playful smile and call me out by saying "Madison Holly"... but now it feels wrong.

If I do see you tomorrow I hope I hold it together. I want to stay cool and collected, give the illusion that I'm doing great... I mean its half the truth, I'm in my owm house, I'm finally finished with uni, I have 3 jobs, I've got a pretty bustling social life, I'm planning a Europe trip, I'm eating and looking healthier... even Nat who hadn't seen me in a long while before tonight and the first thing she said was how good I looked having lost the relationship comfort weight.

I want you to see me and be surprised and impressed and jealous. I want to be everything you want but can non longer have. But who am I fucking kidding, I would explode into a panic attack heap if you were to so much as tell me you miss me.

I'M IN LOVE WITH YOU ALI. I'VE NEVER STOPPED. I WISH I COULD. BUT YOU'RE MY PERSON.