its so weird and wonderful watching in real time as i become more intimate with my friends... like oh.. your husband doesnt think of me as "my wifes friend" anymore but got drunk in costa rica and started talking about how he wants me at his birthday party because im his friend too... oh your brother is drinking a beer and talking about how his wife makes rice and asking me for recipies... oh your aunt is going on and on about how she wants her son to marry someone like me and how good it is to see me again... oh all your husbands old college buddies are excited to see me while since we saw eachother and are including me in alll their inside jokes now.... oh your sister in law just gave me a big hug and your nephews are asking me to draw bluey with sidewalk chalk again... oh im in the kitchen cooking with your mother and shes saying how proud she is of me for getting my teaching license .. she gave me a kiss on the cheek before I left... oh your dad leaned in to hug me to say goodbye this time instead of giving me a handshake and a clap on the back..oh i think im loved i think im loved a lot
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uhgg coworkers dinner tomorrow. they decided to go in a place thats like 30m by car from mine (we live in a pretty small city and im in a town connected to it so it's not that little time. most places would took me 15m at max. so i cant even ride a bike) and i dont have a car because we have 1 in family and it broke. so im gonna have to ask one of them to. give me a ride 🙂 but i dont want to say no. i have to grind the "good workplace enviroment" because if i dont it wont ever feel *okay* to work.
i was talking with my brother and he was complaining about the daughter of the owner of his job. he said he doesnt like her because "she's lunatic, one day she's your best friend, one day she doesnt even talk to you" and i realized im probably that one person at work. i talk when i want which is not every time.
is it that bad in the eyes of the majority of people?? i never really realized it. i even though that it was good that sometimes we talk because i wouldnt talk to them like. ever. theyre so so bland and talk about boys, ibiza, clubbing or shitalking people they know (and i dont). i tried to make friends so i ask aboht them about these things and listening. i talk about me too. but i really dont care. its not a friendship that gives me anything excpt for not feeling like highschool freak when we work.
i dont get it. what do this kind of people want? they dont include you in their talk but if you dont force yourself in them youre a lunatic. so you either suffer from being excluded or suffer from looking desperate to talk to them
this rly brings me back to highschool. uhg. i havent experienced this in a few years because i guess i surrounded myself with people way different from them. good
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dont u love it so much when u just burst into tears with how much u love everyone in your life
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psychological torture is being the only single girl in a gc full of girls who loveeeee to talk about their partners
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