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m1d-45 · 1 year

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Now I thought of something fluffy that make my heart burst

So you're chilling with lil bird xiao on ya

And you're singing to him to sleep

But the moment xiao falls asleep

Your lil birdie poofs into ACTUAL FUCKING XIAO

you at first are panicking until you see xiao start cooing and trying to snuggle up to you

So you end up just having a sleepy xiao on ya until he wakes up

So you end up just having a nice cuddle with xiao

That is until xiao wakes up and nearly has a panic attack due to still thinking you'll freak out

From raccoon anon 🦝

xiao is probably used to his human form and likely found being a bird for you awkward at first simply because he wasn’t used to it. his limbs were in the wrong spots, his joints were different, everything was so odd.

and sleeping is already an activity that he doesn’t partake in anymore. he meditates at night, if he takes a break at all.

but with you…

his eyes droop when he’s curled up with you under the leaves, his mind slows to a crawl sitting under the sun with you. it’s so easy to rest with you.

he tries to be careful, he does, but when he sits on your knee and watches you practice with dendro… it’s so peaceful. so calm.

so… so quiet.

when your bird falls asleep, you don’t think much of it. when the wind seems to blow w bit harder, ruffling his feathers, you double check nothing had blown away before continuing your practice.

when your bird is gone, and it’s a human head resting in your lap instead, you notice.

you startle, dropping the small stick you’ve been working with, the wood landing in the blue strands of a yaksha’s hair. he looks… peaceful, when he’s asleep, his head resting where your bird once was.

so he… was your bird? you knew adepti had different forms, but now…

oh god, you’d been feeding an adeptus bird food.

there’s more to unpack, about the likelihood that he was sent as a spy, about the repeated kindnesses he’s shown you, about the fact that xiao felt comfortable enough around you to not only sleep, but to unconsciously reveal the secret he was unable to spill while awake. a lot to unpack and think about, but you’re not equipped to unzip that suitcase.

so you pick up your stick, and sprout a flower, feeling satisfied with how it looks in his hair.

#m1d : [chats]#m1d : [secrets]#raccoon anon #bird!xiao shenanigans #i could say more #but i need to get up rn and Do Task #so

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dykedvonte · 3 months

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Preston x Danse is the only companion ship I think would actually work because Preston’s inner turmoil is sort of a loss of faith in himself due to the traumatic experiences he’s faced while Danse is looking for something to have faith in and would find the fact that despite the desire to give up Preston held out so long not just for the honor of the Minutemen but because he had some hope.

It would 100% start off as a lotta unhealthy on Danse’s side as I believe he completely lacks the emotional intelligence (due to a combination of factors) to recognize the he’s feelings as anything but a sort of respect for a superior along with leaning too much into Preston as a substitute for the BoS. Preston may not really have a title but he’s like THE Lieutenant of the Minutemen. Realistically he’s the only companion Danse would probably be comfortable taking instructions from especially for how trusted Preston is by the Sole Survivor and his adherence to military standards despite how unstructured the Minutemen are. It would be him waiting for orders, approval, anything from Preston and he thinks it’s just the desire to have the regiment of the BoS again but he also like when Preston compliments him on being useful or resourceful. He likes the stories of Minuteman glory days and he trades the stories of the BoS that don’t hurt to talk about. He likes the familiarity Preston would provide and he’d be oblivious that it’s not just new found loyalty to the Minutemen.

Yet Preston explains it himself that he’s not a natural leader. He’s not an instructor. He helps manage what the General has put in place and he content on doing that. He relays what needs to be done and does major upkeep but I don’t think he’d know what to do with this guy this literally marches up to him and practically begs for a mission that doesn’t exist. Like the formality and respect is nice but he can tell it’s covering something even if Danse doesn’t.

Danse could go to Sturges for the many repair and upkeep assignments he gives him and has the freedom to go straight to the Castle if he really wants a big mission, but he chooses to come to him everytime. He’s aware enough that Danse only trusts him out of all of the Generals confidantes but it would take a bit for him to understand why. If anything Danse should be strategizing with him as equals seeing as he almost got the Minuteme wiped out and Danse was a Paladin for the Brotherhood with many successes under his belt before Preston even led his first scouting mission. It’s like he sees him as some figure of hope, some one who can come in and add stability. Someone with a fresh outlook who can provide a new perspective for him.

It’s like he sees him like he saw/sees the Sole Survivor but that would be crazy because that would also mean… and then oh, it clicks.

The revelation is both flattering and he doesn’t know what to do with it cause how do you address “I know you respect me but is that the only feeling you have for me?” To the guy who like refuses to rest unless you tell him at ease? He has to reevaluate his whole manner of interaction with Danse cause this is a very slippery slope that he’s sliding down and it’s even more perilous due to Danse’s repressed emotions regarding… everything. There’s an equal chance Danse will try to open up as completely shut down and he’s not just concerned about it cause Sole Survivor cares for him but because he has grown to care for the guy too. It’s not like he doesn’t also enjoy Danse’s company and value as a Minuteman member. He’s not a love at first sight guy but he’s played with the idea, anyone would when you’ve spent nights trading stories, historical facts and beers by the fire in a little home you’ve carved for yourself through literal blood, sweat and tears.

I think it’s one of those cases where it’s agonizingly slow to the actual relationship but neither part are anguished about that. If anything happened to soon Danse would be too dependent and Preston not equipped to handle it. It’s a case where I genuinely think they’d bring out the best in each other cause theyd want to figure out what is best for the other and not just apply what they think is the best. It’s the care that Preston would ask Danse what he wants to do and encourage it and at the same time Danse would be incredulous everytime Preston second guesses himself.

Long story short it’s a good ship to me because it’s just two guys with broken confidences and faith in their roles being each other’s hype man and kissin a little about it.

#my thing with the other ships is less that the compatibility is bad but a lot of these characters would not enable the best behavior in eac #other or they want drasticlu different things in life or partners and while flings or non serious things would work long term I imagine #problems would arise that a lot of them would not know how to address with each other like Preston is the most well adjusted besides like #Piper. I’d say Nick but he has the whole I’m technically another guy thing going on and DiMA and he’s a workaholic and throws himself into #danger a lot if Ellie is to be believed so like Piper is the closest next to Preston #a lot of these people should not be in relationships rn honestly because they have barely worked through their issues and should learn to b #health mentally and physically and emotionally alone first as they cling to hard to SoSu #like it’s almost all of them but like Piper Preston and MacCready but RJ is also just kinda a dick but we knows he’s always been like that #Preston x Danse is till more so a like this develops slowly and Danse doesn’t know why his stomach hurts when Preston doesn’t include him i #his patrol squad for the day and blames it on feeling like he’s being excluded for not being good at it and Preston excluding him cause he’#like I need you to do something for yourself of of your own volition but also his buddy deserves a break and does not get that Danse is lik #a work dog that constantly needs a task or he becomes neurotic #I have so many thoughts on the compatibility of the companions cause some of them are like fun partners and fwbs and others would have the #most heartbreaking toxic romances known to man but still get over it the next day and be fwbs like none of them have healthy feelings #Preston x Danse #dunno if they have a ship name #fo4 #preston garvey #fallout #fallout 4 #paladin danse #danse #Danse’s active flirting is like ‘you know how to perfectly create a secure perimeter I have trouble believing it wasn’t just bad timing and #luck with the misfortune that followed your group to concord Lieutenant Garvey’ and it’s like the most reassuring thing Preston has heard #but that is like not a flirty thing but Presont is still smitten by it cause what the fuck does this guy see in him or why is he suxking up #to him and his poor planning skills

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tangledinink · 1 year

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; w ; i said i was gonna be productive and get stuff done today but then i got overwhelmed and took a three hour nap and im not sure if its too late to take adderall or not

#i mean on one hand its not like i have to get up at any certain time or anything so....#i guess its fine?#but also im kinda sorta trying to FIX my sleep schedule rn #not #WORSEN IT #gosh diddly dangit. fudge and beans. jeez louise. man.#personal #txt posts #vent #i really need to make some food to eat #but to do that i should really go to the grocery store #but to do that i really need to do my laundry #thats tOO MANY TASKS

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savetheghost · 4 months

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i hate that i get penalized at work for doing too much work

#its technically a software error cause they want us to have so much money on the record #and the dollar amount correlates directly with the frames on my list that i need to make #so dollar goes down for every frame i put together #this incentivizes getting sales so you are trapped in the cycle of capitalism #generally speaking i think framing costs are high but in a semi-understandable way when youre doing it #materials are made for longevity and have coatings and shit to seal up your art for actual decades to protect it #it Should be a one time purchase when its done properly and theres lil maintenance stuff you can have done #but generally speaking it should last as long as you dont let the wood rot #i do maintenance on shit thats like 200 years old #take it apart clean the glass check the adhesive seal it back up with new paper #thats like $10 #doing a new frame is like $80-a billion dollars and usually its scaled on the size of the art #idk im bored rn i did all my tasks and now im waiting for the imposter to kill me

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a-concert-just-for-me · 8 days

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no yeah I’m getting def getting reassessed for adhd because this ain’t it, chief

#sillyposting #2 more friends just told me I sound like them when they’re off their meds. cool cool cool #my mom said today I make her anxious because she worries about my deadlines more than I do lol #being a student again has really made me say yeah girl you really ARE a hot mess #unfortunately my next appointment with my NP is in a month and they don’t have anything sooner #just refer me somewhere now mannn I wanna get on a waitlist 😓#I’m genuinely in distress trying to focus on important tasks due to boredom #I could be writing rn *buzzer noise* I could just do this tomorrow *buzzer noise*#I already have 30 tasks overdue. what’s one more? what’s the rush? *buzzer noise*#making a to-do list is boring and also scary therefore I refuse to do it *buzzer noise*#I could be sleeping right now *buzzer noise*#I could be researching and writing a paper on a special interest right now *buzzer noise*#I have no concept of what all I need to get done but it’s okay bc my happiness right now is more important #*buzzer noise*#I have no clue what any of my classmates are talking about #because I haven’t kept up with the readings and assignments like they did #but that’s okay I’ll catch up later *buzzer noise*#I’ll take a break and come back. I’ll take a break and come back. I’ll take a break and come back. *buzzer noise*#I’ll start this task and switch to this next one and man I’m bored so I’ll go to the next thing I need to do and man this is boring too #*buzzer gets stuck*#tired of life being one never-ending game of catch-up. I just want to do things without needing a gun to my head #I’ve BEEN saying saying this since high school

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toytulini · 3 months

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wish my fucking brain worked

#toy txt post #feel like im pretending to function by using everything i have to accomplish Some of my Basic Everyday Chores or whatever #but anything that requires the slightest bit more and its just. i got fucking nothing #i need therapy. guess what. sorting through therapists on that little website takes So Much. figureing out what id need to discuss and #address. is So Much. emailing a therapist or 2 to try to see about seeing them? thats fucking insurmountable. i cant do this.#i cant fucking do this. i cant apply for jobs i dont think i can make it thru an interview rn even if it was something well within my #capacity to actually do which is also feels like Not Much i feel like im fucking Rotting #everything takes So Fucking Much and the only way i can do anything is to not think about anything bc that will get me #crying and spiralling and using precious fucking energy that couldve maybe gone to executive functioning for basic tasks #used up to cry about something which doesnt help feels bad hurts uses an annoying amount of tissues makes it impossible to talk and fucking #exhausts me and for fucking what. for what. i dont feel better. i dont feel like ive let go of or released anything or addressed anything #i think im gonna have to do online therapy cos im gonna be cryin so fucking much and i dont wanna cry into a mask every session

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toastsnaffler · 3 months

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looking up info on keloid scarring is so helpful. thanks man I didn't think of trying that one

#well actually that kind of is relevant bc ive been trying to find more info abt tattooing keloid prone skin #which is effectively opting to wound urself. but everywhere is just like if ur keloid prone ummm. Don't do it 👍#theres not enough known abt keloids to predict if theyll be triggered or not by the healing process like it depends on so many things #i mostly get them from acne scars. but they dont always immediately appear sometimes its weeks or months after #n once u get them theyre permanent. treatments for them have a 100% rate of recurrence n will grow back bigger if u try to excise them #and they cant be tattooed over like other scars bc they dont hold ink n the irritation can cause them to get bigger too #it depends a lot on the tattoo artists skill/experience ig like u have to know Exactly how deep ur tattooing + how the wound will heal #bc if healing triggers keloids. well ill just end up with permanent scarring instead theres nothing i can do if it happens #which honestly might still look cool but its unpredictable bc they tend to extend past the original wound. n it wouldnt scar uniformly #urgh. i should probably talk to a gp n an actual tattooist abt it. i could ask to get like a rly small tattoo to test how my skin reacts #pointless thinking abt rn anyway cuz im not gonna get one any time soon i have some other shit to sort before that #but it would be so frustrating if i cant i have so many tattoo ideas i do rly want them.... :-(#ah well whatever.. im just procrastinating doing shit i need to crack on bc i cant spend another entire weekend doing nothing #after a month n a half of being on meds i feel like theyre becoming less effective. my task paralysis n focus is getting worse again :(#like its taking more and more effort its been rly noticeable at work. hoping its just bc of general mental health or poor sleep or smth #and not that im building tolerance or smth bc man. what else can i even do if that happens #this is gonna make me miserable to think abt so lets go do smth else!#at least i woke up feeling tons better today 💪💪💪 storm passed baby #.diaries

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therandomfandomme · 7 months

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it feels like there is a knife being stabbed in my back and I haven't had a free day since January, like genuinely zero 🫠🙃

#rrrambles #we love having bad posture #and being forced to sit at a desk to complete tasks #of which there are many #psa pls check when your classes are before signing up for them #bc i have too many #and it is kinda my own fault #as is the thesis deadline i personally planned in this period #which was an older deadline that i moved #bc im dumb #and didnt check when my finals would be before moving it #so now it is in the week before finals...#yeah i wish i was making that up #but im making progress #though rn im procrastinating on going to bed #to get the rest i need to do all the work

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izzy-b-hands · 1 month

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My doctor messaging me at 12:30 in the morning to tell me she wants to do a telehealth visit abt the side effects I'm having with my new Lamotrigine dose (including worse insomnia than my usual insomnia, as u may have guessed lmao) is. something.

#text post #like i know why i am awake babe why are YOU awake this late #and god why do we have to do another visit #they aren't bad enough to make me stop this dose and i haven't been on the new dose long enough to let it even out #can i not just Not have to do another uncomfortable visit where even if things turn out okay after #i later feel like I'm still not being wholly trusted/treated like i know my body and how i feel #i had worse side effects restarting this med months ago and we didn't have any additional visits for that #they fucking forgot to even book me for a f/u and i had to call in and beg for one basically #and then they misbooked it for the wrong reason and with the wrong doctor #and made it out like it was my fault when i made clear i begged and told the receptionist i spoke to to book said appt #that it needed to b with my doc for the Lamotrigine and that i hadn't been told when to follow up so i was just. doing it #bc she said i needed to but then didn't say when to book it #they're trying hard and im trying to give them grace but then this shit happens and like #im tired. makes me want to go into my new doc like nah never mind im fine. don't ask me nothing and i won't bug you with anything #unless im dying or nearly dead already.#would suck beyond believe attempting to raw dog life mostly again but goddamn. im so sick of this lack of stability with my care #anyway. probably an appt next Tuesday which is great #that's the week of the weekend that i work again and the week before my bday #(a bday I'll be working now which I'm not normally irked abt but. i am a bit rn)#so cool. yeah. let's stack anxiety and fear over a medical appt on top of everything else for that week #and that's not counting that this weekend I've been tasked with buying and getting signed a v expensive and rare figure #for my mum's bf and I'm kind of terrified im gonna fuck it up #he paid for tickets to the con the figure will be sold at and that the person he wants to sign it will be at #so if i fuck this up he'll want (understandably) to be paid back asap for that #and that's money i don't fucking have rn #i really wish she had waited till the actual day proper to contact me bc i couldn't sleep before this #and now i definitely cant bc like #it's dumb. but what if she takes my med away. it isn't perfect but it works better than any other med I've tried #what if she wants me to try a new one. i cant do that and b dealing with major side effects during the intense work schedule #that'll be happening for me v soon and then into November

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arklay · 2 years

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WIP DAY.

tagged by @girlbosselrond @morvaris @aartyom @risingsh0t @phillipsgraves @leviiackrman @indorilnerevarine & @denerims over the past month! sorry it's taken me so long to get to anything at all, i'm sure you guys have heard me address it enough, but thank you all so much for continuing to tag me in things while i've been inactive ♡

tagging @aelyosos @brujah @calenhads @florbelles @jendoe @lightwardens @liurnia @nokstella @nuclearstorms @shadowsofrose @shellibisshe @steelport @swordcoasts @wrymbloods @voerman & all of those who tagged me again cause i'm so behind + anyone else who'd like to share anything they're working on, not just writing! ♡

i haven't written anything since the last wip game i did, but i started trying to put diana's timeline together at the start of january, so i mean... i'll show that instead. as you can see, fatigue hasn't let me do much with it even though i've got all of her timeline already done and strewn about all over the place.

started with 1995 onwards cause it was originally going to be an ewskers timeline situation, but then wanted to include all of her backstory so i went back to the start and still have the late 80s and early 90s to get through before then, but yeah :]

it's going to include like all little moments i've thought of between the ewskers just for me and placing them on the timeline, so you can imagine how long this is going to get if i have to go to 2021 for village... like just 1996-1998 is going to be so much... she's very special to me if you couldn't tell already lmaoo

never sharing this though, it's just for me, and like will help for when i do her timeline page (more in-depth version of what's on her oc page) to just run through canon events and brief descriptions and whatnot. you understand.

everything is blurred out besides 1995 ewskers momence and the years, just cause like idk her i feel weird sharing her in-depth backstory unless it's in dms or something, just cause there's lots going on there and yeah. things. idk

i also made a carrd for twt if you wanna have a look at that :] there's some cheeky subtle things with the two resi items i used as pics hehe

actually, you know what, i'll give a lil bit from where i left of with that rewrite anyways, even though it's been months since i wrote it. but why not

Wesker left a fleeting kiss behind her ear then reached around her and hooked his fingers beneath her coat, prompting Diana to glance back at him. But all he did was gently pull it from her shoulders. She watched him from out of the corner of her eye as he hung it up on the rack by the door, his movements careful and almost calculated, until he turned back towards her, and the warmth of his body returned once more. He pressed up against her side this time, as opposed to her back, and one of his hands found a home on her waist. The way the arm it belonged to was resting firmly against her as he began leading her towards the kitchen was comforting, secure, yet unmistakably possessive. And she revelled in it. He had quite the knack for handling her just the way she wanted.