Tumgik
#but when i hear ppl being close to their neighbors or anyone that lives near them i go a little insane with longing tbh
ablednt · 4 months
Text
Granted I have the overall geographical and cultural knowledge of a 4th grader but from what I can tell the nuclear family model really does seem to be a white colonial invention
Different cultures have different approaches but I mainly hear about either large family units where multiple generations support each other and raise their children and grandchildren together or an "it takes a village" approach where children are raised somewhat communally
And I can't really speak on it much or claim that these families were free of abuse or that children aren't often an oppressed group basically everywhere I know of but the way ownership of your children is so engrained into white society is so bizarre
Like once you notice it you can't unnotice it even the most loving well meaning parents don't know what to do about it because everyone is so isolated from their own families and their own communities so you wind up with 1-2 parents who have full legal ownership of their child and are raised in a culture where you don't have personhood until you're 18 and all attempts at self actualization before them are seen as clueless rebellion. Like our culture is so divorced from the concept that a parent is someone who is helping mentor and care for their child so they can thrive as a fellow human being and it's actually so alarming
And ik this problem isn't unique to white and colonized people but it's honestly really soothing to hear about how other cultures approach and view parenting and community as a whole and to internalize it doesn't have to be this way
#like i was reading a book by Sabaa Tahir who's Pakistani#and the perspective on parenthood portrayed in it so healing#like when Salahuddin mentions that his mom taught him not to thank his parents growing up#''Ama taught me that saying thank you to your own parents is unnecessary. Akin to thanking your lungs for breathing. The times I tried#she looked at me like I’d rejected Saturday-morning paratha.''#and like obviously the idea isn't that your kids should be ungrateful im assuming that it's their behavior and overall respect thats thanks#but as someone who was raised thanking everyone for everything especially my parents no matter what it really stood out bc even little stuff#like that can make a huge difference yk? since I can remember white adults particularly my parents taught me i was a burden#and that their taking care of me was an act of kindness rather than a responsibility and I don't think it's some big conspiracy to make kids#feel horrible but it's not really teaching gratitude it's just teaching guilt#thats just one example tho#I also am at the extreme end of white cultural isolation (neither of my parents are close to their families we've never lived near them and#they specifically isolate us from everyone so the difference is a lot more drastic for me than it probably is a lot of other people#but when i hear ppl being close to their neighbors or anyone that lives near them i go a little insane with longing tbh#like what is that like? to grow up in an environment where your world is more than just your parents approval?#where there's some kind of insulation between you and all of your parents problems bc there is no one else#this was not a ramble with any kind of conclusion tho akehrjdhr#and once again I am absolutely not saying that child abuse is uniquely white bc. el em ey oh thats not how any of this works#it's just that white cultures view on children is sickening
12 notes · View notes
soulwillower · 3 years
Text
semi-charming •  bill denbrough
(bill denbrough x reader smut)
requested:  Do you have any bill denbrough x reader’s that you have finished that can be posted? I really love your work I re read it like everyday lol :)    +      AKANSHAKAKMA U SHOULD POST THE BILL DENBROUGH HATE SMUT AHHHH     +     don’t be shy post the b.d hate smut 😀🔫🥰🌝
i haven’t posted a fic in well over several months but i hope u guys like it :) im here and around still so send me something if u wanna chat <3 i also have re opened my requests lkajsdlkaj
also - i gained a lot of new followers while i was gone and im sure some ppl want to be removed from my taglist SO: i am gonna start a new taglist!!! pls send me a message and let me know if you want to be on it bc after this post im starting fresh  !!!!!!!!!
warnings: drinking, mentions of weed, dorm living, almost-strangers hooking up, smut, choking (light), light spitting, a tiny bit of dirty talk, switch!bill, its kinda fluffy smut tbh, enemies-to-lovers but its so lowkey, kinda cute guys, neighbor-ish au, 
(losers + reader are 19+.)
4.1k words
the first time it happened, you wrote it off as unintentional. 
it's happened to everyone: you're joking around with your roommate, or reaching over to grab your laptop, and you fall off your bed to the floor. you knock over your lamp or someone knocks over the handle that was sitting half-empty on the mini-fridge. the tile on the ground of the dorm rooms are hard and cold and don't do much to quiet the noise of anything, so you get that. 
but whatever the hell was going on in the room above you was not that. it was three in the morning, and your head was spinning in that sickening way that only happens when you take too many drinks in a short time and find your way to bed for a few hours before being startled awake. 
a loud thump made you jump in your bed, heart racing as you woke in surprise. 
it was around twenty more loud thuds from your ceiling (in a span of barely two minutes) that you gathered the energy to slide out of your bed, sliding on your dorm slides and throwing on a shirt to cover your near naked body before storming into the hallway to climb the most challenging single story of stairs in your life, right to your upstairs neighbors' door. 
your hand was banging on the door for a mere five seconds before the door swung open and a terribly confusing sight fell onto your eyes. 
three boys who you've only ever seen in passing before in your dorm, all shirtless and heaving breaths. the one who answered the door, possibly bill or mike (judging by the stupid name tags on their door), has bright eyes and dark auburn hair that reflects in the dim light of the hall, backlit by the neon purple from inside the room. his sweaty bare abdomen made your eyes twitch as you glared at him, suddenly more irritated because he's kind of really hot and stupid and annoying, and you needed to sleep.
"hi.” he said casually, and you could tell he wasn’t entirely sober, either. 
“so what is your fucking problem?" you said in lieu of a greeting, half-asleep and pissed beyond belief (also still drunk). the boy who answered the door raised his brows, head turning with a brow raised, as if to ask his buddies 'are they for real?' before turning back with a large, cocky smile, "pardon you? we already turned down the music." 
you blinked, knowing you must have seemed so rude and looked insane but it was a weeknight and you had class in the morning, "wh- what, no- i'm not here about music. it's like three, you're slamming on the floor and i can hear it like i'm in a fucking tornado in my room below you so you need to knock it off." 
then the other boy, further back with foggy glasses, started laughing. the other one laughed too, rubbing his neck sheepishly, still breathing heavy. "what the hell are you guys even doing in there?" you added, running a hand through your hair in exasperation. 
"they were trying to bench press me. but then bill decided to start doing squat jumps onto his bed." the boy with glasses explained as he rubbed his chest, still concealed by the darkness of the room, illuminated only by the stupid LED neon lights that every single person in the dorms had lining their rooms. that explained the thudding. 
"why." you'd deadpanned. you were too tired for this, but you'd wanted them to understand that it was keeping people up. "richie got us kicked out of Pike for stealing their doorknobs and pledge class photos." the third boy says, elbowing the boy, richie. "we felt like working out, but then richie said we couldnt press him, so..." he trails off at the look you give. 
"you want my workout routine or something?" richie asks you. you sharply inhale and bill smiles, "well, if that's all, we'll be going. i've got one more rep to get in." 
your eyes widened, jaw dropping at his words. he'd laughed, then, and your eyes couldn't stop as you stared at his sculpted abs flex in the light. god damn it. 
"chill out, neighbor. sorry to wake you from your beauty sleep." he said as he noticed your look, and you wanted to fucking hit him. 
you rolled your eyes, picking up on his facetious tone. "whatever. just knock it off. thanks," you'd griped, sarcastically smiling at them before trudging away towards the stairwell. and you'd caught it when bill muttered, "is now a bad time to assemble my ikea desk with my drill?" 
you'd run into bill once again a few days after when you'd gone to use the bathroom on the floor above you where your friend lived, washing out the bowl you'd used for lunch. a 'shh!' had made your brows furrow as you'd walked in, not paying attention as you'd heard a shower stop and a girl laugh from the other side of the bathrooms. 
but a deep voice grunting 'ow, fuck' made you freeze and then feel hot, wondering what kind of luck you have to be in the bathroom when some people were hooking up in the shower. but you're reminded that you had the worst luck when you go to leave the bathroom and two figures round the corner, hair soaking wet and hoods pulled over their heads. making eye contact with him, he must've seen how flustered and irritated you were, because he cracked a grin, "good to see you again, neighbor. you sleeping well these days?" 
that was only a few days ago. you'd seen him in passing at a party at one of the frats, but had avoided any interaction with him after you saw him and his friend with the glasses snickering to themselves after sneaking looks to you. god, you didn't want to face them again - they were so mocking, so cocky.... so rude, and they made you feel like you were being insane just for wanting to have peaceful sleep. bill was not your favorite person. 
but as bad as the first two experiences were, the third time you had the misfortune of interacting with bill, it was the worst. 
your roommate was out for the weekend, and you'd found yourself stuck with your leg and ankle pinned between your heavy file cabinet under your bed and your bedframe, unable to scoot it over on your own to free your leg. 
you were planning on relaxing tonight, after being stood up from a booty call hook up. you’re mad, frustrated, horny, and close to tears now that you’ve gotten yourself stuck pinned to your bed.
it’s nearly one in the morning, and nobody’s in the hall. 
but then, bill walked past your open door as you struggled, and desperately you called, "hey!" 
his double-take into your room, his head poking in, would have been charming if the face was anybody but him. 
"what?" he asks, suddenly noticing it’s you. his voice is not charming and calm as you've seen him be with other peers, but in your stubborn mind, you convince yourself it’s fine; you don’t like him, either. 
"i'm stuck, can you help?" you say despite your thoughts. 
he sighs, dropping his backpack next to your bed and then tugging to try and move the cabinet. 
"how did you do this?" he mutters as he pulls as hard as he can to pull it, but your shoe is too wedged diagonally against the floor, cabinet and frame. you sigh, "thought i could nudge it to the side with my toes, i dropped my dab through the crack." 
he chuckles, trying to instead shove it backwards instead; to no avail. "smart girl." he says sarcastically, and you roll your eyes, trying to help him shove it. "what was the point of you keeping me up all fucking night if you aren't strong enough to move this shit?" you say, exasperated because it's starting to dig into your calf. 
he stops, rolling his eyes at you. "has anyone ever told you that you can be a bit rude?" he asks, moving closer to you to try and push it away. you look down at him from where you stand, elbows on your mattress. "no. you're just a dick. fight fire with fire, or whatever." you mutter, face feeling hot. 
you can't stop staring at his shoulders, his arms - they're so hot, the veins popping out of his hands and forearms, the smell of his aftershave wafting into your nose from where he kneels next to you. 
he just hums. "i'm going to try to push your leg forward and then push the cabinet away." he states, and you nod, just wanted this nightmare to be over. you're still terribly embarrassed and the proximity to such a hot and confusingly irritating boy is making you lose your grip. 
it takes a lot in you to not jolt when his warm hand wraps around your bare leg and starts to pull you, his strong hold on you making you tingle. "what's your name?" he asks, and you almost laugh as his grip on your thigh tightens, the feeling of his fingers wrapped around your skin making you hot. this is insane.  "y/n." you struggle out, throat feeling dry - there's no reason his hand needs to be so high up on your leg, but some part of you really wants it. "it says that on my door." you say breathlessly. 
whatever he was going to reply with is cut off as he tries to readjust his grip on you and the cabinet, but his hand slides up and grazes the skin near the apex of your thigh, coaxing a sharp gasp to fall from your mouth. 
he turns red, looking up at you, "god, sorry." he mutters, and you bite your lip, unable to look away. 
you kind of forget to say anything, stuck staring at him, heart thumping as wetness pools between your legs just from this boy's touch. god, you've got to get laid. 
his arm is wrapped around the onside of your leg, thumb reaching higher on your thigh than his other fingers, and for a moment you hesitate before deciding to go for it: you drop your hand hand to his hair, pulling lightly as you 'steady yourself,' smirking as you feel his shaky breath against your thigh. 
you don't even care about getting unstuck now, all you can think about is being fucked into the mattress by this asshole boy from the fourth floor. you’re not sure where this feeling came from. 
when he finally pushes the cabinet away, causing you to stumble to catch your ground. he helps you get the cart and then push the cabinet back, awkward small talk making you want to die. "why were you down here anyways?" you ask, rubbing your leg. "mike kicked me out to be with a girl and all my friends are out for tonight." he sighs, rubbing his neck. "i have to do homework tonight, just going to find somewhere quiet to get it done." 
"that's surprisingly responsible." you say, looking at him wearily. he gives you an annoyed look, "what's that supposed to mean?" you roll your eyes, "you don't seem particularly academically motivated." you state, unsure if you're coming across as flirtatious or just a dick. he gives you a look as he moves to grab his things from next to your bed. "you seem more pleasure motivated." 
you catch your mistake immediately - and he does, too, smirking. you stutter to fix it, "don't be gross." you defend weakly. 
he's biting his lip and something rumbles in your chest, flames in your abdomen. it's hard to gauge if you don't like him or if you do. maybe you're just horny.
"i thought you were cute, you know, until you showed up at three in the morning to chew me out." he mutters, eyebrows raised, "i get that that was annoying, but it was a saturday. everyone was drunk, i don't get why you are still being a bitch." his face drops when he says that, as if he didn't mean to say it at all, but he doesn't take it back. you shrug, not too offended. he kind of has a point, "i don't get why you have to make everything so much harder than it has to be. doesn't matter how hot you are,  i don't have to like you, you know." you say, crossing your arms with a smirk. 
"believe me, i'd rather you not like me." he says, smile on his face troubling. you look at him, trying to gauge why you're feeling so flustered, why you want to jump his bones right now no matter how annoying he is. "then why haven't you left yet?" you challenge. you figure if you're reading his actions wrong, this gives him an out. 
"because i kind of want to fuck you now." he says boldly. you just smirk, walking towards where he sits on your desk chair, lowering yourself to straddle him. he looks up at you, eyes large and mischievous as he pulls you down on him all the way, your hips grinding lightly. "i think you want to fuck me always." you whisper, lips hovering above his, teasing. you're eating up all his attention, soaking it up and savoring the way he watches you. 
you boldly snake your hand down between the two of you, lips still refusing to touch his, your hand starting to tease his clothed cock as it hardens under your palm. you stroke him as you lean, almost kissing him before pulling away. he glares at you. 
then you move your hips, the tension in your room killing you. he lets out a half-moan, causing you to buck your hips again, relishing in the pleasure it gives you. he leans forward, trying to catch your lips, but your hand catches his chest, your lips just centimeters from his own.  "fuck you, y/n." he says, fed up with your teasing as his hands squeeze your ass, moving to the bottom of your thighs and then rising with surprising ease, holding you against him and making your heart thump in shock. he takes four long strides towards your bed, tossing you on it. you grin, expecting for him to climb onto you, but instead he's walking towards your door, making your heart quicken. is he leaving? 
he slams your door shut, though, and it makes you smirk as he clicks the lock. you're on your back, the sight of him upside down making you bite your lip, eyes nearly even with the bulge in his sweatpants. 
he walks up to you, and you eye him as he bends forward, hand catching your chin, holding your head forward with a strength you didn't expect. "look at me." he says suddenly. you blink, feeling hot as you stare into his eyes. 
"don't tease me." he says, and you swallow, heart racing in excitement. "okay." you croak, and it seems to satisfy him because he tilts your neck from here he holds your neck and chin, kissing you soundly on your lips. you feel on fire at his touch, squirming as you slip your hands into his hair - it's making you so needy that he's holding you, almost trapped on the mattress, kissing him upside down. 
he pulls away and you flip around, allowing for him to climb onto the bed, barely enough time before you pull him in for another kiss, this one heated and desperate. 
he bites marks on your neck as your hands palm him, pushing your own thighs together in need. slowly, you push him down against your mattress and sling a leg over his hip, moving to straddle him. his hands find your hips easily, looking at you like you're the only thing ever worth looking at; your breath leaves your lungs and you steady yourself, the reality of how fucking beautiful bill is hitting you at once. 
you pull his shirt off, yours coming off, leaving you in just your shorts and underwear. he palms your tits, pinching your nipple as you grind down against his cock, whimpering at the feeling of his pants against your clothed clit. "if only you'd come up to my room like this." he says, and you snap your eyes to his, seeing the teasing grin but glaring at him. "maybe you would've been nicer to me if you knew how good i'd make you feel." he whispers as you resume your hip's movement, "shut up, bill." you hiss. he laughs, his thumb making contact with your clit takes you by surprise and you jump a bit, moaning quietly as your eyes close in pleasure. 
"take these off." he mutters into your mouth as you bite his bottom lip. you take off your shorts, quickly resuming your spot straddling him, his lips trailing from your breasts to your throat and then your mouth again, grinding against him in need. he toys with your slit over your panties before he pulls them slowly to the side, spreading your juices on his long fingers, humming as he brings his fingers to his lips, watching you as he licks his fingers. you nearly moan, impatient enough that you kiss him, tasting yourself on his lips faintly; "do you want me?" you whisper against his lips.
"i wish i didn't," he says, "but yes. do you want to do this?" 
you're breathless, beside yourself with need, "yes." you say quickly, tugging his sweats off and tossing them to the floor. "fuck you, by the way." you spit, flipping him off. he grins and it's fucking beautiful, his smirk, his red cheeks, heaving chest. budding hickeys bloom over his neck and chest as he catches your hand, tugging you forward over him, whispering, "you're about to." 
you roll your eyes, ignoring the butterflies in your chest, hand falling over his as he pumps himself. your thumb swipes over his tip, spreading his precum before opening the condom he'd pulled out of his pocket (you don't even want to know why he brought one with him to study) and roll it onto his cock. 
and then you’re pushing aside your panties and stabilizing yourself on bill’s chest. you line yourself up on him and look to him for one last confirmation. he nods, “quick fucking around, babe.” he says, but his voice sounds desperate and his cheeks are flushed and you let out a strangled moan as you sink onto him, the nickname making your stomach flutter. you have to stay and give yourself time to adjust to his size, his moans swallowed by your own mouth as your tongue swipes his. his hands roam your body, squeezing your hips, your ass, your breasts and then rising to cup your neck and back. 
“shit, bill.” you whimper as you slowly start to move up and down. his eyes fall shut in pleasure and his head tilts back, exposing the entire expanse of his throat for you to claim, his hands falling to your hips. your eyes watch his thin necklace shine in the faint light from your lamp and he's filling you up perfectly. 
he looks like fucking heaven.
you kiss his neck lightly as you pick up the pace, bouncing on him steadily as his fingers grip the sides of your thighs.
“fuck, y/n.” he whispers, staring at you with his lips caught between his teeth. the feeling of him stretching inside you and hitting the perfect spot has your legs shaking already, breathing heavily. he’s soon surging up, kissing you deeply as groans fall from his lips, his arms rising to your waist to hold you as you move.
"you're much better when you're not talking." you mutter as you fuck yourself on him, moving your hips as you bounce. he rolls his eyes, "i'd fuck you every day if it meant you wouldn't come ruin my fun every night." he quips back, eyes challenging. and your hand rises to squeeze around his throat, at first as a joke, but then he smiles brightly, a smirk that stirs something in you and you squeeze ever so slightly, the feeling of his pulse making you moan. 
his smirk sends butterflies through your stomach, pleasure swirling in your core. but then his own hand rises to your own throat, squeezing lightly.
you moan, unable to keep it together. "you think two can't play this game, y/n? it's like you don't know me." he tuts, seemingly pleased as you're flushing, gasping as your legs stutter, his hips moving up to meet yours, strokes hitting you deep. “i don’t,” you whisper, and he hums. 
your legs stutter after one particularly satisfying thrust and he grabs your hips, lifting slightly and biting his lip as he starts to thrust up into you. “oh, my god,” you moan as he hits your g spot and he curses under his breath.
your hand comes up to rest on the wall behind him as you meet each other half way, hitting a spot deep inside you that has you moaning his name loud enough for anyone to hear. you hope to god your next door neighbors are out. 
he presses his lips to yours and you know its to get you to stop being so loud - it makes your toes curl in pleasure. then his thumb snakes its way to your lips, his grin widening when your lips immediately part and suck on the finger, humming around it as your hand rests on his neck, the other over his abs as you bounce. 
"so pretty like this, y/n." he leans up, then, sitting up more and changing the angle, making you gasp with a moan as his hand snakes around your waist, pulling you closer to his face with the hand on your face. he pulls his thumb from your mouth with a light pop, your legs barely riding him at your proximity, instead steady on his hips, his cock warm and stretching you. "do you think you'd look pretty under me?" he asks. you swallow, moving your hips again and sliding on his cock, movements making you stare at him, pleasure building. 
"i think you would." he whispers, hand still on your neck. you whimper a bit, sliding off of him, allowing him to climb over you, kissing you soundly before pulling you to the edge of your bed, legs hanging off as he stands in front of you. lifting one leg, he kisses your knee and holds it up as he teases your slit with his cock before sliding into you again, causing you to let out a loud moan, his own melding with yours. 
your eyes roll back at the new angle, legs shaking as his fingers dig into your thigh. “wanna see your f-face when i make you cum.“ he mutters, hand rising to thumb your lip, dragging your bottom lip down.
 "you think you're gonna make me cum?" you bite, knowing no man you've been with has been able to. 
you watch as his eyes admire the half-lids of your eyes, the blissed, fucked-out look on your face. your chest is littered in blossoming hickes, varying from pink to dark red and slightly purple already. 
he says nothing in response to you, but pulls your leg further open, spitting down onto your cunt, making you moan lightly, the action being terribly sexy. his thumb finds your clit and starts to rub perfectly in counteraction to his thrusts, his lips finding your nipple. 
you gasp in pleasure, panting as you start to wonder if he really is going to make you cum. then his thumb rubs circles on your clit and as he presses lightly, you can’t hold off any longer. “fuck,” you hiss as you hit your peak, your orgasm making your legs shake. you can’t help it, gasping and bucking your hips as you clench against his cock in bliss, your orgasm causing you to tug his hair in ecstasy. “so pretty.” he mutters against your neck, pressing kisses to it as you’re moaning and arching your back. "so good, cumming for me." he says cockily. you're panting as you whisper, "shut up," his hips still pounding into yours. 
“god, you're such a sweet talker.” he mutters sarcastically as you look at him desperately, his eyes fall shut in bliss, a deep groan leaving his lips, you can tell he's close. 
"and you're such a gentleman." you jest back, pulling him closer by his shoulders, eyes shutting in bliss. he hums, strokes getting sloppier, "i let you cum first, didn't i?" he counters. 
you huff a laugh, something in your heart twinging in affection. you kiss him so you don't say something stupid, moving your hips with his. a few strokes and he's pulling you closer to him by your back, whimpering into your mouth, “y/n, fuck.” beautiful moans fall from his cherry colored lips as he cums, and you just stare at him in awe, surprised by how hot it is as he says your name. he rides his high and then falls off of you, onto the mattress between you and the wall. 
"hey," he says after a few moments of you both catching your breaths, your hands overlapping on your stomach but not nearly holding hands. it makes you feel warm in a weird way. excited, nervous. 
"what?" you ask, turning to stare into his eyes. he smirks, "you think we woke up the downstairs neighbors?" he whispers, eyes alight with tease. 
you shove him, smothering him with a pillow while he laughs, pulling you onto him. 
tag list:  @gabiatthedisco @blisshemmings @stenbrozier  @sft-core @clownsloveyou  @moon-shine-baby  @daughter-of-the-stars11 @trashedfortozier @oceandog13 @kait16xo @upamongthestarss @fiantomartell @beverlyparkerr @beauregard-s @diorbubs @leighjaenikhowell @groovybimbo @deepestofwaters @unfortu-nate-ly @sassy-uris @loverloserrr @hauntingkaspbrak @soph-ec @hockslutter @babytortie  @decafcoffeew
688 notes · View notes
nikvs-blog · 5 years
Text
Tumblr media
pov rp: i try to wink at u but i close both eyes like jinsoul in this gif <3 SBJDWBDJWBDJ hello im xan im 22 & from the est timezone i use she / her pronouns & ur watching disney channel. is this super late ? yea...but thats super on brand for me its fine its fun its sexy so * jugkook vc* let’s get it !
— jung jinsoul. she/her. cis female. | was that niko seo i just saw in the hideaway lobby ? i hear the twenty-two year old spends most of their time working as a waitress, but i’ve always just seen them scribbling poetry on napkins. they live in 3A and i often see them in the halls. they always give me a vibe of making wishes on falling stars, silk ribbons adorning messy ponytails, and breakfast at midnight.
BACKSTORY
so miss niko was born in a teeny tiny suburban town in north carolina to a pair of  young high school sweethearts ! unfortunately her mom passed away during childbirth so it was a very bittersweet arrival into the world for baby niko
her dad was a mechanic who never made it to college since his girlfriend got pregnant towards the end of their senior year. they got married before niko was born though because they were pretty serious abt raising her right but they never really got the chance to /: but her dad loved his job he loved working with cars & it was something his own dad did before him plus it was a job the town really valued since it was so tiny ( u really only needed one of everything )
when i say tiny i mean everyone knows everyone tiny. growing up the town kinda pitied niko bc of her mom dying so to compensate everyone kinda tried to do their part in raising her ! her neighbors were just as much of a parent to her as her own dad was, and everyone had stories abt her mom so niko kinda appreciated how small the town was.....sometimes
that changed as she got older ! when she started high school her dad kinda entered a rough patch & started drinking more with his buddies, started working less, and niko started getting calls from the sheriff at 2 am like “hey we’re gonna keep ur dad for the night he didnt do anything crazy but he got a little too drunk u can pick him up tomorrow” sort of thing 
she was there for him every time but it got kinda overwhelming knowing everyone was in her family's business & how much kids would gossip at school or adults would give her sad looks
basically she kinda just....became very disillusioned with her reality & began to realize no one around her was really.....happy or had big dreams and their entire lives revolved around this tiny town which scared her
but also ? it had started becoming her life, too. she was voted prom queen senior year, she had a job at a diner where the same people ate everyday, she’d been dating the same boy for four years and everyone talked about how they’d probably get married soon. she’d become exactly like everyone else without even realizing it....she didnt have some big dream.....she didnt even have plans for college she was just so stuck
and then disaster hit the summer after she graduated high school. her dad had crashed right into a tree on a rainy night trying to drive home after a night out drinking & died on impact. the news honestly didnt feel real to her until her grandparents were helping her clear out her house so she could come move in with them 
which is when she finds her mom’s old diary ! and boy was that thing . fat & juicy ... it had all four years worth of her mom’s high school years inside and niko became ...obsessed with it. all she did that summer her dad died was read her mom’s old diary learning more abt the woman from those pages than she ever had from the mouths of everyone in her town
 thats how she found out her mom had always dreamed of moving to some city like seattle and starting this new life once she found out she was pregnant with niko ! so niko was like ok this has to be a sign....told her grandparents she loved them but she couldnt stay in north carolina.....and boop ! she pretty much disappeared from the town, didnt tie up any lose ends ( including her bf of four years who she was kinda engaged to ? JSDBJBDJ ) because she just had to leave that bad. 
cue a scene on bus with niko looking out the window as some dramatic song abt new beginnings plays . JSDBJSBDJW seattle was truly her new start at 18 ... and all she wanted to do was just ... reinvent herself 
so she did ! first thing she did was get a job as a waitress bc uh ur girl was BROKE broke but she knew she was good at serving. the first year was.....pretty rough there’s no sugar coating it niko was struggling bad, probably living in some questionable apartment when she wasnt coach hopping at her coworker’s places. despite all this she was....insanely happy she really believed ( and still does ) seattle is magic !
she was working at a diner ironically, just like she had been back home, but this diner changed her life about a two years ago. one day one of her regulars ( a very well off lawyer who worked downtown ) told her she was way too pretty and charming to be serving at a place like this & that he had a buddy who owned an upscale restaurant near his job downtown & that he could probably get niko a job there if she wanted
so she was like UH hell yes....showed up the next day at this fancy restaurant, charmed the pants off the owner, and the rest ? is history !  she moved into hideaways a bit after getting this new job & has been there ever since <3
PERSONALITY + TIDBITS
personality wise niko is kinda ....hard to figure out. she doesnt do it on purpose, she’s just still learning about who she is and what she really wants. back home in north carolina she was kind of the small town golden girl, loved by everyone type of deal but also very romanticized by those around her ??? ppl thought she was brilliant and knew so much about everything when the truth was she just knew a little about a lot. she would read to escape the suburban boredom of her reality & took a special interest in things like art and poetry and astronomy. shes the type to want to share the stuff she’s learned with those around her
in seattle since no one knew her the way they did back home, niko decided she wanted to keep it that way. because of this and because shes so hesitant to talk about her family sometimes she can come across as mysterious but she’s a surprisingly open person !! she’s naturally super curious and friendly and she’s found it really helps to be the kind of person people want to get to know and trust when working in the service industry. she’s got the type of aura about her that makes you feel as if maybe you’ve known her forever, even if she’s only told you one thing about herself ( which is often the case) . can probably make anyone feel at home within five minutes of talking to her & you won’t even realize how she’s doing it. her boss swears she’s charming enough to sell honey to a bee ! 
she’s also got a flighty side though that comes out when you get too close. niko’s great at relationships when they aren’t deep, but the moment you start and figure her out and see past the smiley walls she’s got up she recoils fast. in a way she’s terrified of anyone knowing too much about her because she’s scared that once they do they’ll pity her, and niko can’t stand being pitied. she’s also super good at dishing out affection but not so good at receiving it. the type to fall in love then right back out of love in one day. kinda a heart breaker bc of this but she doesn't mean to be, she just gets infatuated kinda easily & isn’t very good at keeping things serious ever since literally running away from her long-time ex in north carolina JSBCSJBDJW 
some fun facts: she wants to get a cat and name it cat so bad but she’s not sure she’d be a good pet mom so she just settles for petting stray cats in public. 100% that weirdo crouching in the street making kissy noises because she saw a cat and wants to pet it. she can name just about every constellation & loves to sit outside and look at the stars on clear nights, usually while smoking a joint . she’s a hardcore lightweight .... im talking one tequila shot and she’s floored ... two glasses of wine and she’s taking her top off  then crying kinda deal like she CANNOT handle her liquor so she tries to keep partying to a minimum. she’s got a collection of napkins from work were people have scribbled their phone numbers onto as well as a collection of napkins niko herself has scribbled on. she mostly writes poems and sometimes she even leaves a napkin with a poem on it behind at a table like a little gift for whoever sits there next. she’s probably always writing poems for all her friends or infatuations so if you’re in her life....you’ve gotten one at some point ! 
the only thing she brought with her from north carolina were all her records. she’s got a pretty extensive collection that ranges from donna summer to louis armstrong to led zeppelin & when she finally got a record player of her own in seattle it was probably the best day of her life <3 she really likes to watch scary movies but also they scare her so bad so it’s a cycle of oh yes lets watch this.....fuck why did i do that.....im sleeping with the lights on rinse & repeat. she really likes to cook ! she learned at a pretty early age out of necessity but now she does it for her own pleasure also because of her growing interest / knowledge in the restaurant industry. her wardrobe is 95% thrifted and 5% stolen from miscellaneous people ( her dad, old boyfriends, hookups, friends, etc. ) is a notorious hoodie thief so dont lend her yours......
and this is WAY too long im.....so sorry this literally always happens aha <3 yes i ramble but thats bc . i have a lot to say and i also have a lot of love to give ! spare some plots ? we can im on tumblr but i am 100% easier to reach on discord  @ EL i love u 💖✨🌙#8172 so hit me up there & lets get this show on the road baby ! 
17 notes · View notes
nikatyler · 5 years
Photo
Tumblr media
Last replies before I move to my dorm tomorrow! Prague, here I come. 
I’m in this weird state of freaking out and being calm at the same time. It’s hard to explain. It’s very different from how I felt the day before starting high school, I remember crying about how badly I don’t want to go there. As for today, I’m actually looking forward to the classes. Especially the history ones. Oh my god, and I’ll see my new friends again on Thursday! Maybe even tomorrow, but I’m not counting on that. I’m so exciteeeeed.
I don’t think I can give you any updates on my sims saves at the moment. I played a bit of Roses (finally!), a bit of my Realm of Magic save, a little bit of NSB...but mostly I just recoloured stuff. I’ll release it for simblreen I think, even though it’s not Halloween themed at all. For one of the tops I’ve even taken the preview pictures and the only “spooky” thing about them is that they were taken in Forgotten Hollow. But oh well. I mean, at least you’ll be able to use my simblreen treats all year!
elisabettasims replied to your photo “So basically, I’ve come to conclusion that high free will is broken in...”
Something I had to do in TS3 when I attempted something like this was remove almost EVERYTHING that was fun to get them to socialize at ALL. Because they would rather do something fun than talk. Before that, I would manually tank their social so they would have a NEED to talk. Yeah, it's kind of cheaty but, jeeeeesh.
Here’s a tiny spoiler: I moved the whole BC household to Twinbrook, which is most definitely smaller than St Claire (and, being an EA world, it has to be somewhat optimalized to run on all PCs I believe)...and suddenly my high free will is working, there are interactions between the sims...I love that! Wish I had realized that earlier though, it could’ve made the BC more interesting. Oh well, it was a learning experience. I might do another BC in the future. Keyword might. It definitely won’t happen next month.
poisonfireleafs replied to your post “You would think that signing up for classes is no big deal...but the...”
I'm almost done with my studies, but I really know this feeling
plumbobhart replied to your post “You would think that signing up for classes is no big deal...but the...”
im at the end of my uni studies and i still get anxious about signing up for classes D:
plumbobhart replied to your post “Phew, that was fast! The best times were gone in less than five...”
that sounds horrifying. my university is so small that some courses are self study cause it's very possible you're the only one taking it (love that). i'm taking a course in chinese though, and we're over 40 ppl on the course and it's kinda terrifying.
I’m going to the oldest and I think the biggest university in my country, so yeah, so far quite a lot of my experiences have been terrifying because there’s just SO MANY PEOPLE EVERYWHERE. I signed up for an optional class today though, and so far there’s six of us. But for the other ones, there’s about 20-40 students in every group, and then there’s one lecture where there’ll be 250 students. It IS scary.
1o8percent replied to your photoset “Glimmerbrook Home I know, I know. Not the most creative name but hey,...”
I love it!
Thank you! I really like it too. It’s not too complicated because I just wanted to play the game.
elisabettasims replied to your photoset “Tao: “This is getting more fun with every second.” Annemarie: “I...”
I miss the TS2 days when your neighbor would come yell at you for peeking in their windows.
They would WHAAAAT? That’s so funny! Wow, I really should give TS2 another try, every time I hear about these little things I’m so amazed.
tashsim replied to your post “�� yeah!”
hah, no idea
Yup, that was the point haha!
toxoplasmajuice replied to your photo “Maybe my high free will isn’t as broken as I thought it was. I...”
ur doing great sweetie
lbr that would be me if I ever entered a BC
swinging outside while everyone else is socializing
tiny-tany-thaanos replied to your photoset “So what exactly is happening here? Tao is flirting with Hannah and...”
They are just exploring their options in case they get eliminated XD
I’m not surprised...but in front of the bachelorette? The girl they’re fighting for? Ruuude
1o8percent replied to your post Closing ts3 now because I need to take some pictures in ts4...in the...”
From your NSB I like Valentine. As for your Rose legacy I’ve always liked Reagan and Sammy from your current generation.
Aww yeah, they’re my, let’s say, secondary faves too!
Secondary faves sounds so sad tho
tiny-tany-thaanos replied to your photoset “Scarlett: “Why did you do that? Of course we’re not supposed to do it...”
It was expectable... Especially from such sim. I actually feel sorry for her - she isn't that lucky so far... Except for winning a challenge but it didn't save her from a further failure...
I felt so bad when I rolled the dice and had to pick this interaction. But also, I was curious. Maybe it would work out. Well, it didn’t, and then I felt twice as bad.
lilleputtu replied to your photo “The title for the most useless BC host goes to…”
She is doing her best and I appreciate her efforts of absolutely ignoring the whole BC moderating business :D
She’s a whole mood in this challenge and I’m living for it.
toxoplasmajuice replied to your photo “Scarlett: “It’s happening, isn’t it? We’re running for the worst BC of...”
i mean. it could be worse, scarlett. nobody's dead. *yet*
*nervous eye emoji*
(i’m not saying anyone died, but there might have been some uhhh...near death experiences)
melien replied to your post “Hi I just wanted to come in and say I hope you’re having a good day...”
Wow damn this is so organized, it inspires me to clean out my mess at least a little bit
It’s the curse of being taught to think like a librarian for four years and having some slight OCD on the side
melien replied to your post “Closing ts3 now because I need to take some pictures in ts4...in the...”
Gen 6 of the Roses was pretty fun, and I especially liked Lydia (even before I got to make a spouse for her)
Ahh...I really, really want to love gen 6 as much as I love gen 4. If anything, the storylines (especially Regan’s) are so much better than anything og gen 4, and I’m proud of them. But I guess it’s kind of like dating a new person while still missing your ex. You love them but you miss what you had before. Which totally makes sense coming from a person with zero dating experience.
berryconfetti replied to your post “simmeronnie? Doing simblreen this year? It's more likely than you...”
i did it for the first time last year and it was pretty fun. Crazy to keep up with, but fun ��
I hope I’ll be able to do it! I have my cc ready like I said, but will I be here to have my porchlight on? I don’t know. I mean I should. Just because I’m moving to uni and have already made plans with some people doesn’t mean my social life will suddenly make me unavailable for simblr stuff. If anything, that might happen over longer time period, not in a span of one month.
elisabettasims replied to your photo “Happy Bi Visibility Day to all my fellow bisexuals! ������”
*raises a fist* That me.
*high fives you* *gives you awkward finger guns* Yayy!
8 notes · View notes
devouer · 7 years
Note
unusual asks: 1-100,,,,, All of them,,,,,
Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora?
spotify!!!
is your room messy or clean?
clean usually, although it’s weird right now with moving back home and getting rid of pretty much everything I owned before this year
what color are your eyes?
dark brown!
do you like your name? why?
i like elma ling but not elma very much just because of the flow + because my host family used it to differentiate me from my host sister emma so I associate it with warmth and familiarity + it’s cute and reflects my heritage?? idk I feel like it fits me well enough
what is your relationship status?
marrying @katsudaddy and adopting our dog cranberry and our cat sock and living in a cozy apartment together
no but rly im single but so involved in my friendships that like... honestly I put no difference in commitment between them and romantic relationships
describe your personality in 3 words or less
grateful, I think, more than anything! I hear things like sincere and mature pretty often too, but I think love and thankfulness define my perspective towards others more than anything
what color hair do you have?
dark brown
what kind of car do you drive? color?
I don’t drive
where do you shop?
a lot of MUJI and uniqlo ngl + a bit of zara/h&m + school apparel + thrifting
how would you describe your style?
minimalist but dreamy? kind of a mix of european and asian styles
favorite social media account
instagram probably! I use tumblr and snapchat quite a bit too
what size bed do you have?
I mean, I had a twin in france + at school, but here I have a full which makes me very sad it’s too big for one person so I’m trying to switch rooms/beds with my brother
any siblings?
my brother, who’s 13! I also have five host siblings even if they’re not my real family :’)
if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why?
honestly, considering the languages I know right now, I’d want to live on the west coast of france – there’s nowhere I feel more at home in terms of the people and lifestyle, and I love the way the light endures in the evening and the delicate beauty of patchwork cities and gardens... I’d love to live for some time in Russia, China, and Japan for language acquisition, though!
favorite snapchat filter?
I never use the filters omg but hm I love when @katsudaddy sends me bunny filter snaps she is cute
favorite makeup brand(s)
colourpop is the bomb! + nuxe, la roche posay, and the body shop are good for skin and beauty things that aren’t makeup
how many times a week do you shower?
probably around 5
favorite tv show?
YURI ON ICE
shoe size?
36 EU/6 U.S.
how tall are you?
5′2″!
sandals or sneakers?
sneakers!
do you go to the gym?
I work out regularly, but not at the gym bc it was too expensive in france >:( I’ll probably start going now that I’m back, though!
describe your dream date
picnic and museum or exploring tbh... or going to the sea at a quiet hour... anything rly what matters is the other person!!
how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment?
around $40 I think
what color socks are you wearing?
not wearing socks atm, but was wearing grey socks earlier!
how many pillows do you sleep with?
one usually
do you have a job? what do you do?
I’m camp counseling this summer!
how many friends do you have?
probably a good dozen, although I have around 4-5 really close friends!
whats the worst thing you have ever done?
clarify worst
whats your favorite candle scent?
LAVENDER I LOVE EVERYTHING LAVENDER it reminds me of home and early autumn in the loire and the fields of provence and my favorite honey :’)
3 favorite boy names
remi, alexeï, antonin
3 favorite girl names
irene, tereza, kiyoko
favorite actor?
the 12 year old in me is still hopelessly in love with orlando bloom
favorite actress?
katherine reber class of 2017
who is your celebrity crush?
nathan chen......................
favorite movie?
i rly love amélie!
do you read a lot? whats your favorite book?
i read a decent amount, but used to read all the time before hs! my favorite book is The Unbearable Lightness of Being by milan kundera!
money or brains?
um brains lmao I don’t like having many physical possessions
do you have a nickname? what is it?
elmy, elm tree, elmdog, soup dumpling, soup, xiao long bao, red bean, elma ling was a sort of nickname that became my normal name, french bitch
how many times have you been to the hospital?
none lmao
top 10 favorite songs
rachmaninoff piano concerto no. 2 (esp. the second movement!)
rach 3
rachmaninoff ave maria from “vespers” (can you tell that rachmaninoff is my total comfort music)
debussy arabesque no. 1
theme for a taiwanese woman in lime green by devendra banhart
immobile by cliché
you only live once by the strokes
chosen by blood orange
astor piazolla tangata
getting to know you by spazzkid
do you take any medications daily?
nope
what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc)
normal-ish? i have acne which is annoying but it’s been getting a lot better since I’ve come back I’m convinced bretagne water was just really bad for my skin
what is your biggest fear?
losing my ability to learn with the ease needed to continually better my understanding of the world and others (lest the progress of time bypass my ability to view the flow) and thus have unsatisfiable ambition and love
how many kids do you want?
none rly
whats your go to hair style?
half-back, sometimes french braided
what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc)
decent-sized family home, but I can’t wait to get out and live in an apartment I rly hate having space idk
who is your role model?
MY TEACHERS especially my physics and french teachers I rly adore them and could never express my gratitude for the dedication of their lives to my growth
what was the last compliment you received?
friends’ parents saying they believe I’ll do great things in the future and wishing me good luck at uni :’)
what was the last text you sent?
“OH MY GOD TOO FAR”
how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real?
idk little me was caught between knowing better and remaining purposely ignorant out of a nostalgia for wonder in total unknowing of infancy so
what is your dream car?
i literally don’t ever want a car of my own
opinion on smoking?
very harmful, never something i’d try... like, I have a lot of friends/classmates who smoke and I’d never judge their characters from that, but idk I think it’s a rly bad habit
do you go to college?
yep, uchicago!
what is your dream job?
i’d love to be a journalist or writer with international involvement but idk really! I’m very flexible when considering my future!
would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs?
RURAL AREA like anywhere but the suburbs tbh like a city would be ideal, but at least in a rural area, I could have a thoreau-esque retreat
do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels?
no i never use them
do you have freckles?
yes i have so many spots on my skin idk it just pigments very easily
do you smile for pictures?
i do now (even though i prefer candids by a long shot) but i would refuse to when i was very little maybe until i was like 6-7
how many pictures do you have on your phone?
7133 
have you ever peed in the woods?
so many times lmao i hike i have no qualms
do you still watch cartoons?
.........does yuri on ice count
do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds?
idek the difference
Favorite dipping sauce?
curry sauce!!!
what do you wear to bed?
if it’s cold i bundle up in sweatpants + a patagonia, but if it’s decently warm, i just wear underwear
have you ever won a spelling bee?
no
what are your hobbies?
piano, painting, picking up new languages bc i’m a loser, organ, photography, hiking, teaching english from time to time + writing + editing
can you draw?
decently ehhh
do you play an instrument?
piano, violin, and organ!
what was the last concert you saw?
probably the marriage of figaro at the prague opera if that counts lmao..... i don’t go to non-classical concerts idk
tea or coffee?
tea usually, but I love a good espresso
Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts?
neither
do you want to get married?
@katsudaddy and I are already married
what is your crush’s first and last initial?
CB
KIDDING lmao no i’m not really into anyone romantically right now
are you going to change your last name when you get married?
depends on what sounds nicest tbh... I don’t like the sonority of my last name much so...yeah probably
what color looks best on you?
deep red looks nice, but I prefer wearing neutrals + greens/blues
do you miss anyone right now?
my family (host fam)
do you sleep with your door open or closed?
closed, but i used to leave my balcony doors open sometimes in france
do you believe in ghosts?
no
what is your biggest pet peeve?
PHONES OUT DURING MEALS
last person you called`
my dad
favorite ice cream flavor?
hmm I had a honey-almond gelato near marseille that I rly liked!!
regular oreos or golden oreos?
i don’t even remember what they taste like
chocolate or rainbow sprinkles?
rainbow bc they’re gay
what shirt are you wearing?
white t-shirt with a loose denim dress on top
what is your phone background?
aljkdfsh fanart of yuuri kissing viktor on the head... very cute
are you outgoing or shy?
honestly i think the best way to describe me would be intense? like, i rly swing between extremes with this depending upon where I direct my energy, so like... idk I’m naturally quite private but come off as outgoing bc I put up that front in public events when I have to
do you like it when people play with your hair?
ppl don’t rly play with my hair but I like playing with others’!!
do you like your neighbors?
idk the neighbors in PA or even in France, but at school, I lived with my classmates and teachers, and I loved the majority!!!
do you wash your face? at night? in the morning?
both!!!!
have you ever been high?
nooooo
have you ever been drunk?
yes, but I stay pretty in control
last thing you ate?
strawberries!
favorite lyrics right now
idk I don’t really think I have any! the sonority of music has always been a lot more moving to me than the lyrics
summer or winter?
summer, but the dawn of spring is my favorite time of year
day or night?
the last hours of day in the northern summers where the sky will be light almost until midnight
dark, milk, or white chocolate?
DARK like 85%-95% is good
favorite month?
maybe march or april... it depends on the weather each year!
what is your zodiac sign
taurus but idk it’s Very inaccurate for me (like i constantly crave change and take initiative to throw myself into uncomfortable and new situations, and I eschew material possession... at least i’m rly loyal though?) tbh my chinese zodiac (dragon) is much closer to my personality
who was the last person you cried in front of?
dave, my physics teacher :( I was thanking him one last time for showing me a way of surviving, u know? like there’s so much love and passion in what he does and idk I always worry about losing spark and so it’s like... idk he reminds me that there is always life in love if that makes any sense
2 notes · View notes
leaughrilke · 7 years
Text
super-sensate-seestras replied to your post
“Who do u think the superbabies will date?? :D (also since stella looks...”
I would love to hear more about Stella and Beth's relationship drama cause I absolutely love all of these breakdowns about the superbabies
WELL FRIEND there’s other drama too but this is the Major drama that hinders their relationship for a long time
so stella know she has a crush on beth, has been like aggressively ignoring said crush and tryin to Live Her Life and its been a year since stella came out, came to terms and she’s just started her nighttime shenanigans as a vigilante, just started trying to help the way kara does, the way maia does and its going ok???  until she.  you know.  gets stabbed (LIGHTLY STABBED) and is like hmmm i feel as though i should reassess maybe
and then beth’s back in national city after graduating early with like three bachelors (xenobiology, nanotechnology, and engineering) and at least one masters and a corresponding doctorate (in something sciencey, listen im barely an english major), working at l-corp bc she’s a Documented Genius and stella wants to step up her vigilante game, especially since she recently was lightly stabbed and doesnt rlly want that to happen again, and beth’s always been rlly calm and steady, very logical and she keeps all of maia’s secrets, so stella approaches her a little reluctantly to see if she’s willing to help and beth gives her this long, searching look and finally agrees, designs and builds her a new suit with a shitton of gadgets, is the main reason stella starts getting called mechagirl by the press but only helps with stella’s promise that beth can then help with actual missions bc like??  beth cares about her a lot too, doesnt want to see her die ya know??
and it’s weird??  bc now she’s friends with beth in her own right???  works alongside her a lot and beth serves as her tech person, finds her jobs she can do that supergirl or birdy (maia’s superhero alter ego) haven’t gotten to yet and national city gains a new superhero pretty much bc of beth.  and then its a late night of saving ppl and stella comes back to her apartment/headquarters and beth’s still there, wrapping up some end of night reports (she insists on keeping detailed logs in order to avoid any issues with the cops later on) and she’s ordered stella’s favorite takeout, put it in the oven to warm for her and stella’s so grateful and also pretty tired??  rlly tired and beth basically lives with her and sometimes the proximity blurs lines in stella’s mind and so she just leans down to kiss beth, murmurs thank you sleepily and goes into her room to change.  and beth’s just sitting there??  like oh my god, the girl i’ve been in love with for months just kissed me and she doesn’t even realize it but then stella REALIZES IT and runs back out like shit im so sorry beth, that was so inappropriate of me but beths like??  wait do you not like me and stella’s like WAIT DO YOU LIKE ME???? 
surprise!!  this is how stella finds out beth’s an alien and also how beth finds out stella’s an alien lmao.  like.  beth’s species has mental shields, similar to martians??  so stella’s never been able to read her or see in her mind but she never rlly tried to or even questioned it??  or even noticed bc she’s rlly empathetic anyway, reads body language rlly well, so she’s never known that beth likes her the way stella likes beth
like, later in their relationship, stella suddenly can read beth??  like rlly well and she’s like um what the hell and beth’s like oh, yeah, i stopped putting up the block and stella’s just like starry eyed like holy shit you trust me that much???  
beth’s like uh yeah but dont let it go to your head you nerd
but are they smart abt this and admit their v deep feelings for one another then??  no.  they just hookup and then keep hooking up, pretending like nothings changed, pretending like theyre not basically living together or doing all the shit Couples do but just refusing to tell anyone or acknowledge it at all.  and it’s ok for a while??  its solid
but then stella’s suit malfunctions, gives her a nasty burn down her side and she begs beth to not tell anyone that she’s in the hospital, that she’s been hurt and beth’s like shit, stella, i can’t keep doing this bc they’re working with a budget of about eleven dollars, a starburst, and stella’s bus pass, building with shit from the scrap yard and old electronics from secondhand stores and beth wants stella to just tell her family she’s the new vigilante bc then they’d have access to better resources, then beth wouldn’t be so scared every time stella runs out to go save a family from a burning car or stop a bank robbery, but stella refuses, knows that it would be a battle to be accepted like this.  
its a fight they’ve had for months before and then stella’s armor fucks up and beth just calls it.  tells her that she comes clean or beth won’t help her keep almost dying, so stella tells her that she doesn’t need her and beth moves all her shit out of stella’s apartment and its all rlly quiet, subdued and its so fucking sad
she takes the job offer she has at wayne security in charm city (wink wink) and doesnt tell stella, stella finds out when she goes over to her moms and finds beth there, with maia and her moms and finn, all laughing and grinning and maia tells her that beth is getting her own department at wayne security, that she’s moving on friday and stella fakes a smile, congratulates beth before she leaves and that’s the end of it, she never sees beth again
but then stella wrecks her motorcycle.  i think i mentioned once that stella is a little bit of an adrenaline junkie??  well she’s a huge adrenaline junkie and she was testing the limits of her newly redesigned bike, pushing it past 90, 120, 150 and then she just??  loses control of the motorcycle.  it just spins out and stella tries to stop it, turns into the spin and pumps the brakes which slows it down enough that she doesnt just fucking die, but not so much that she’s not close to dying
beth is still her emergency contact.  so beth gets the call, middle of the night, that stella danvers was in a wreck, is on the way to the hospital and that she should get here as soon as possible.  but beth is a ten hour drive away and can’t possibly know that she’d get there soon enough, be there if....if it came down to stella not being alone.  and.  well.  its not her place, never was.  so she calls lena, tells her the emts called the last number stella called bc its so much easier that way, kinder to everyone she thinks
she still drives through the night to national city.  gets there just a little after maia does, her eyes red and puffy from sobbing on the freeway, hands shaking a little.  thank god no one asks why she’s there or why she’s this panicked, bc she’d probably tell them and she knows that’s the last thing stella would want (or, well.  she thinks that at least).  maia just sobs out that beth is the best friend for coming, holds onto her in this desperate, damp sort of hug and beth just stays quiet
beth doesnt stay after she finds out stella woke up, is going to be okay.  she can’t right??  she shouldnt be here in the first place right??
so maia stays in national city to help stella in her recovery bc stella’s being stubborn and refuses to move back in with their moms, and maia figures most of her moping is to do with the fact she’s not allowed anywhere near her motorcycle anymore, but then she finds this one shirt that she knows is beth’s, knows beth has had since high school and its tucked under stella’s pillow and she puts it together pretty quickly.  the way they were friends and then all of a sudden they werent, the way beth came running back to nc the second stella got hurt, that weird pulse of anger, hurt she felt when stella found out beth was moving to charm city.  and like???  she doesnt know what to do with that information, she’s not sure what to feel or how to think about this so she just files it away for a later time, tucks the shirt back under stella’s pillow without saying anything
so eventually stella gets convinced to move back home, bc maia’s like hey.  i dont mind living with you and i dont mind helping you, but the neighbors are starting to think its weird that i carry you up the three flights of stairs to your apartment every day so finally stella moves home and maia comes with her bc they’re finally in a good place again??  they finally worked things out between them from when they were kids and maia’s not about to leave stella, not when stella’s like finally started seeing her as another Certified Safe Place.  so they’re back in their childhood bedrooms and then lena finds out about stella’s vigilantism.  mostly by accident??  stella’s still p much out of commission until her body’s at a 100 percent again but lena finds the mask and its a whole Thing between them, the first time stella’s ever really fought with lena and then by natural extension, kara finds out and then maia clues in and then the whole family has an opinion on it and stella’s just like MCFUCK OFF
and maia??  is like desperately scared for her sister, and she’s angry and she’s hurt that she didn’t tell her, didnt think that she would do anything to help her, but she also knows how isolated stella feels, how helpless she must be feeling, how stuck she is, so she calls beth
and when beth is beating around the bush with it, playing dumb like idk why you’d call me??  stella and i really aren’t that close, maia just calls her out on it like.  elizabeth, i know for a fact you were sleeping with my sister
oh
yeah, oh.  i have some words to share with you at a later date, but right now stella needs someone in her corner and that can’t be me 
and beth doesnt like.  doesnt even hesitate.  she drives her shitty beat up jetta the ten hours it takes to get from charm city to national city and gets a shitty hotel and is so, so nervous??  bc what if stella doesnt want her here??  what if she never wants to see beth again???  but then maia’s texting, saying that the house is empty if she wants to talk to stella and she does, she really does, like?  she didnt realize how big of a part of her life stella was until she was gone, until she had moved to a new city and met new people like she’s completely in love with stella, so she goes
stella opens the door and just stares for a second before she says that maia’s out for a while but beth just keeps looking at her and finally says it outright, says i’m here to see you, stella like its the most obvious thing in the world and stella’s so tired, she’s starting to close the door and she’s saying i dont need another lecture, i’ve had enough of those for a lifetime and beth lets her close it, knows her well enough to know she wont walk away from the door before beth does, so she calls through and says im not here to lecture you, stell.  i just.  i wanted to see you
the door opens
and its incredibly uncomfortable for a while, incredibly tense and when beth tries to ask her what’s going on, stella just hisses what, like you care?  and beth like??  normally would fire back with something, normally would let this blow up into a fight but she’s thought about it, she really has, and she knows that any time she can have with stella is better than no time at all.  that she’d rather take stella as she is, thrill seeking and too good for words and hard headed in the extreme, take the risks that come with her than have anything else.  so beth nods.  yeah.  i care.  i care a lot about you stella, and i shouldnt have forced you to make a decision like i did.  but its scary when the girl you love doesnt see the same value in her life that you do and it was terrifying watching you leave every night and not being sure if i would wake up to your face on the news
and stella’s like??  shit.  shIT, didn’t account for this at all.  but beth is very steady, is giving her this even-keeled look, keeping her eyes on stella but not forcing eye contact and she finally stands, gets ready to leave 
and she tells stella i love you.  and believe me when i say that transcends boundaries like platonic and romantic.  i love you, stella danvers, and i will always be here for you, in whatever way you want me to be and then she’s leaving 
and stella has a choice to make, two paths she can take and she stands a little unsteadily and grabs beth’s hand and pulls her back 
and she’s like im still pretty stupid, you’re aware of that, right?  and beth laughs, refutes the statement as she rests her forehead against stella’s.  you’re not stupid, stella, never stupid.  a little dense sometimes...  and stella laughs too before she admits, finally, i love you too, genius.  and i dont think i can keep doing this without you?  and she tries to backpedal, bc she’s worried she’s being manipulative or something but beth just shakes her head, says im going to kiss you now, ok?  and stella’s nodding fast, tears finally starting to fall when it all hits her and then they’re kissing for the first time in six months and theyre maybe still kissing when everyone comes home and maia groans bc like i texted you specifically so i could avoid seeing this ugh you guuuyyysssss
19 notes · View notes