#call of duty modern trollfare.

[lxvvie]

You and Simon are that couple who have a lot of inside jokes. You'll text him, "Send dick," and it's a picture of someone who gets on his nerves (it varies and Graves and Johnny have been featured a couple times). He'll text you, "Send tits," and it's different pictures of the bird.

It becomes your way of checking up on each other when he's deployed.

[lxvvie]

Do you think Simon tells a different story why he wears that mask every time he’s asked? Like that one chef from Ratatouille?

In pure Simon fashion... yes.

The latest one is, "Too good-looking, luv. It keeps the birds away."

You just—

[lxvvie]

This is slightly angsty but imagine Simon took his sass too far one day and genuinely hurt his s/o‘s feelings. He‘s just going shit, shit, shit when he realises his mistake.

Aww, anon. 😢

Simon is panicking so bad internally and while you know he didn't mean to hurt you, it feels good to have THE Simon Riley grovel swallow his pride, cater to you, and ask for your forgiveness.

If he did it through text, block his ass lmao.

Speaking of text, imagine texting him something like this: