#calling herself ‘helly’

[shrinkthisviolet]

…I said I didn’t want to make another OC and YET I can’t stop thinking of a “what if Mark and Gemma had a daughter before Gemma died” OC idea

[fellhellion]

the way fans try so desperately to divide Helena and Helly into seperate people instead of recognising that this is one person now at war with herself when divorced from the influence of her upbringing is so bizarre. “She’s starving Helly, can you believe?!” she’s starving herself, of whom Helly is both a half and whole of and vice versa, hope this helps 👍

[ocdhuacheng]

Finished severance

[kendrysaneela]

Thinking about how Helena was the one who saw Mark after the extension cord incident. Millchick says that Helly didn’t wake up Helena did. So this?

Is Helena looking at Mark who she either doesn’t know yet or only knows as a random Severed employee. She’s hearing him scream for help as he gets her down. She’s feeling him carry her, she’s hearing him call “Helly!” Over and over again with great concern in his voice, she’s seeing him have to be convinced and yelled at to leave her side.

I think this is what leads us here.

She stops the tape here. On Mark. She recognizes him from that day. The man who saved her. So she follows him around the building seeing where she goes and then she sees him talking to Helly. Herself essentially. And then.

She finds out. This man who saved her? Saved her because he loves Helly. That’s why she watched it so many times. Helena has never been loved before. But here he is. Loving her. He saved her. And he loves her. Just….its not really her. I can see why she rewound that tape.

[kestrel-of-herran]

there's sooooo much meaning in mark turning and walking back towards helly and so many layers to the scene in terms of both emotions and narrative implications.

up to this point they both thought they were about to die. mark would get gemma out of lumon for his outie, turn into him and wait on his mercy to be sucked into his consciousness in a capacity that might render him into nothing more than an echo or a ghost, and helena would never turn back into helly because mark scout and gemma would expose lumon and terminate the innies' existance. mark s. is staring at this oblivion when he's staring at the door and the woman he doesn't recognize calling out for a version of him that needs him only for the labor he can provide for him in dulling his pain and earning his money and rescuing his wife.

when the red lights turn on over helly she thinks it's already over, that mark got gemma out and she'll never get to see him again. britt said the alarm reminds her of her escape attempt at the staircase, so this is where she runs to on impulse, for the slightest chance she might be able to see him again.

when she calls out his name it's just a single word to all of gemma's cries and pleas, but it's the only time in this scene when "mark" denotes him, the innie. her voice and the sight of her at the end of the corridor ground him back to himself, remind him he is a person, he has people who care about him and love him and want him because of who he is, not who he could be, and that he has things he wants and people he doesn't want to lose. he might have nothing in this world built just to control him but he has this choice and he has her and their love.

when he starts walking to helly he's made that choice with every atom of his body, but she still doesn't understand, she's thinking maybe he wants to tell her something, maybe he's coming just to say goodbye. it only hits her fully when she sees his expression, all the love and desire and rapture there, all the feeling in his heart, that this is real, that he's making this choice, which means she's not about to die and she's not about to lose him. the girl who didn't want to live half a life has become the only thing he wants to live for. it's this sublime moment of disbelief and relief at the enormity of salvation that can be achieved through your actions when you didn't ever hope you could be saved.

and then he takes her hand, and nothing exists in the world but them anymore. the world was built for lovers all along. he looks at her like he wants to drink her in and she finally lets herself have it, lets herself feel joy and pride and this conviction, my love mine all mine, nothing in the world belongs to me but my love does. and triumph, too, she chose well, she gave her heart to him and he's more than worthy of having it, and love as a source of power and lust for life, if it's the two of them against the world nothing can stand in their way.

the music is enormously important here, it coocoons them in their emotional journey, shelters them from the incomprehensible anguish of the outsider. this moment is only for them, their connection something they built and earned and will continue to fight for, independently and in spite of every controlling entity in their lives.

it's an action that is also a statement, a discovery and definition and actualization of self, i'm this kind of person, i'm the kind of person who wouldn't lose you. it's a rubicon moment, a point of no return which is the start of time, a line whose crossing will remap their world.

what he did is life-defining for both of them, the choice to put themselves and their love first, the choice to say i am a person worthy of life and joy and agency. the triumph of the human spirit over the dehumanization of the dystopian narrative.

[forpsheturnpesbian]

Baby they’re gonna clown mee

Word count: 900+

Paige Bueckers x Azzi Fudd

AN: this took me WAYY too long to finish sorry abt that anon, hopefully I did this ask justice love yall.

Its a random tuesday when Azzi decides to say “fuck it” and post a draft dump.

And in that very moment Paige doesn’t think much about the reasoning behind her phone buzzing, so she picks it up without too much thought.

Till she ends up a little shell-shocked by the fact that the girl who’s barely on socials, posted? again? For the fourth time in the past two weeks?

“Damn mackenzie workin overtime” she thinks logically rare occasion that mackenzie probably posted a few more things for azzi

“Damn..” she mutters, already stuck trailing over the first photo, now all of a sudden very grateful.

She takes a quick breather and checks the time with her peripheral, “pretty late, Azzi prolly posted this” she thinks then moves on to the next slide.

She sees herself on it. And even with her back turned toward the camera she knows in that moment azzi is all she sees. Hovering over her—as if looking over her long enough would cause her to never leave her sight, even after tonight, like a moment that won't ever end and won’t ever fade—she catches herself doing it more and more nowadays.

Cause back then she didn’t need to, back then she had the luxury of seeing her damn near every single day, but now? Paige will have to earn the essentials, and learn how to spot the speckle of peace buried within the chaos, and to steal it for moments like that. Then she thinks- no she knows—that if she could, she’d steal all the time in the world for azzi.

Then she shrugs herself out of the rabbit-hole she dug herself into, moving on to the next slide- and oh dear god she’s already writing the thank you letter to whoever built the camera, sold the camera, distributed the camera, and captured the picture in all its flawless glory. She finishes the letter in her head by the fourth slide

Then her eyes hit the 5th slide.. That time she absolutely didn’t catch herself staring at her chest.

And just to add insult to injury Paige was clearly gripping her knee at some odd attempt of regaining composure.

Not a minute later azzi’s phone is basically yelling at her to answer, and she does. What she didn’t expect to hear on the other line was:

“WHAT THE HELL?”

Paige asks tone slightly frantic

“what the helly..? Did I do that right?”

Azzi questions still oblivious as to why Paige was calling in the first place

“Imma just ignore u said that and move on to more important things, like idk the dump. WHYY-”

She says rubbing a hand down her face

“What you don’t like it?”

Azzi says barely concealing her amusement

“BABY I LOOKED LIKE A 14 YEAR OLD BOY THAT'S NEVER EVEN SEEN BOOBS BEFORE ” she says all in one breath then proceeds to look at her ceiling her mouth tilting downwards—wallowing in her own self pity.

“I mean you-“ azzi (smirking) manages to get out before Paige cuts her off

“BRO I'M BEGGIN YOU DO NOT FINISH THAT SENTENCE”

“This is it now huh? This is my life now—never leaving this room, I'll just live off of doordash.” The guard says, staring blankly at an empty wall. Then squinting suspiciously at azzi hiding her face

“ARE U LAUGHING AT ME RN?!?!?” Paige say appalled

Azzi sucks in her teeth “No baby, of course not” she says soft and low which seemed to calm paige down a notch.

“Quick question what and why the HELL-“

“The people need to know you think I look hot”

azzi says like it's the most obvious thing in the world—as if she was stating grass were green

“And so they can keep it cute”

“So that every girl in Dallas who even thinks about trying anything knows who came first”

azzi says it like it is—Simple.

While Paige lies there, staring at her through the screen, equal parts dumbfounded and completely-utterly in love.

Before she snaps out of it and remembers she’s supposed to be mad right now.

“God forbid I want to keep the little dignity I have left.” Paige Mutters with a hint of amusement

“Eh it's not that bad-”

“That's easy for you to say, YOU’RE NOT THE ONE GETTING SIMP ALLEGATIONS.”

“Aren’t they just fact checked statements at this point?”

“Baby they’re gonna clown mee” Paige practically whines

And Azzi tries— like really, really tries not to let it slip that she’s absolutely laughing her ass off in her head, while paige is mentally preparing herself for the mental warfare that is being teased by not only the people you love the most, but everyone with a pair of functioning eyes and ears.

“No they won’t” and even azzi doesn’t believe herself the second she says it, while paige just stares at her for a moment with a knowing look.

“Be so fr rn” the same expression on her face and running a hand through her forehead

“I mean you did give them the fuel” azzi says on the verge of snorting

“WHAT?!? BRO ME??”

“You were the one looking weren’t you?”

“GOODNIGHT.”

“Goodnight I love you” she says—still a bit of amusement left in her tone and a chuckle at the end, but still like each letter was wrapped in a warm blanket.

“I love you more” P says after letting out the longest sigh of her life, but says it with every bit of sincerity left in her nonetheless, she smiles a dopey “only for azzi smile”

[helenaeaganenjoyer]

Helly rebels against a tyrannical system not only because she has an innate sense of justice, but because she has nothing to lose. Born into oppression without indoctrination. She is a clear-cut victim. She doesn’t have to unlearn anything to act on her gut feeling without internal collapse. It's easy and natural for the audience to love her.

Helena was born into a gilded prison. She is trauma bonded to a cult and cannot conceptualize what a normal life looks like. She survives by aligning herself with the abuser (her father, the board, the mythos of Kier). At Lumon, she's a paper tiger, clinging to the illusion of power to justify sacrificing everything that makes her a person. Because power has been used against her for her entire life, it's the only thing she believes can keep her safe.

At surface level, for a good portion of the audience, it's easy to see Helena as the oppressive force, directly antagonistic to the obvious hero, Helly. It's easy for them to ignore the context clues that show Helena as the latest cog in a never-ending cycle of generational trauma, because we empathize with Helly so strongly. It's easier to blame our parents for raising us poorly than to face the reality that they are deeply flawed, broken people too.

So when Helena does morally dubious things like stealing Helly's identity and calling the innies animals, it's easy for the audience to write her off as an evil wench who should be banished to non-existence, giving her body to the person who actually deserves it. But how long until Helly gets broken down by life? How long until Helly decides she has something to lose (MARK) and is forced to compromise her morals and actions to protect herself? We've already seen a glimpse of this during the season 2 finale and people are so allergic to the idea that they're convinced she must actually be Helena.

Helena didn't choose Lumon any more than Helly did. Helly is morally lucky because she's free of the psychological chains Helena was born into. I have a feeling those chains are coming for her soon.

[notbxnny]

Can you imagine being Milchick and walking past Helena on one of the upper-Lumon floors after she laughed in your face about her own family’s made-up religion??

Up there, she’s one of the unflinching upper echelon holding him to the impossibly high, demeaning standards that weight down on him—but down there, in Woe’s Hollow, she’s playing the part of a severed employee, the figurative and literal lowest of Lumon, there’s the expectation that the dynamic would be flipped, except Helena is trying to imitate Helly who she sees as volatile, unpredictable, animalistic. She is presented the opportunity to openly indulge in ridiculing the whole Kier-religion for what’s probably the first time in her life, under the guise of being an innie, whose thoughts and feelings and lives are entirely null. 

For Helena, it’s probably therapeutic but meaningless, it’s little more than screaming into a pillow because she’s not going to voice these thoughts or act on them afterwards, the severance floor is a self-contained little escapade for her to indulge in—what they’d probably class as—sin.

Milchick is never given the opportunity to break from the insane belief system or the innumerable rules within Lumon, he finds no connection or camaraderie. The entire ORTBO was carefully arranged by him personally, not Helena, and he recites from the book in a way that seems almost haunted. And before Helena starts laughing, they all seem slightly shaken by it, even Mark and Dylan, before she kinda lets them in on the joke, before she gives a glance of an outside, lucid perspective that rattles the illusion they have spent their whole lives under. He has to stand there, reciting to her a story crafted by her people to be read as gospel, and immediately Helena laughs like she’s breaking character.

In the end he can’t even directly address or reprimand her, instead he turns to look at Mark and seems to shift the blame to berate him for siding with her, and then likewise snaps at Dylan. Burning the marshmallows was a punishment for the innies, Helena as an outie has access to pretty much whatever she wants, but food is one of the very few things that is rewarded to the innies; where they are deprived of so much, it’s one of their few, fleeting points of connection to the outside world.

I dunno. In episode two, he says that hearing that Helena Egan herself was coming to personally work with them was a miracle, and that probably was the case for a relentlessly dedicated employee such as Milchick. He brought her flowers after her first day, he held eye contact with her as her skull was drilled into and her brain was severed. Mr Milchick I kinda get why you let her drown just a little bit before you called it in.

[sorrydetka]

helena watching helly kiss mark over and over… helena laughing at helly’s joke with mark… helena being comfortable with mark and joking around… helena never feeling love and tenderness in her life so she stole it from helly, a version of herself she considers subhuman… helena not having to say she was ashamed of her “outie” to mark because mark never pressured her on the lie, because mark loves helly unconditionally but doing it anyway… helena hearing that mark doesn’t care who helly is out there, only who she is with him… helena will never be forgiven for her moment of weakness because of the cruelty of it… irving sacrificing himself for helly, willing to kill her… helena calling only to mark for help... mark slowly realizing the lie and rushing to hold helly… helena proving to herself how unworthy of anything good she is…

[redclovertea]

burt saying “i drove people places, i didn’t ask what happened when they got there”… the episode being called “the after hours”, that unknown period in the realm of work… this episode is about uncertainty. this episode is about walking into the dark, making choices, blindly, following orders, blindly. it’s about what happens when we submit ourselves to the unknown. mark and devon going to cobel not knowing for sure that they can trust her, and then mark s waking up outside of work, entirely confused. irving getting on the train not even really knowing where he’s going (burt drove him there, he can’t know what happens). both versions of dylan wanting to quit, knowing what that means for outie dylan’s security and innie dylan’s life, but still going through with it. dylan steps into that elevator, into the unknown. helly faced with jame, the audience not knowing what will happen now he’s got there. milchick standing uo to drummond, not knowing for certain that this won’t cost him greatly. ms huang getting in that bus, because she has no choice. even cobel is only helping mark and devon because she’s no way else to deal with this situation. she drove herself there, drove them all to the cabin, but she doesn’t know for sure what’ll happen. it’s an episode of uncertainty, and the real after hours of it will unfold next week, and unlike burt we will get that question answered - what happens when they get there?

[ovenproofowl]

I loved the conversation ms cobel had with mark s this episode. call it scientific fascination, infatuation or obsession, but by placing herself directly into both marks' lives, she was the only impartial party shy of the audience itself. she doesn't try to win mark over by selling him fantasies about how he can still have a life afterwards, she's the one who told mark's outie about his innie's relationship with helly, she knows that won't work. instead, she tells him the cold hard facts. that his entire purpose at lumon was to create the very consciousnesses that are keeping gemma trapped in her own perpetual hell. his job has been the direct cause of her suffering, and whether he likes it or not, once his job is over, so is his life. there is no out for him. she isn't appealing to him through his outie's love for his wife, she's appealing to him as a person. a person who is being used, just like she was. a person who will be discarded, just like she would've been if she'd gone with helena that night. she's not waving a secret third option in front of his nose, but making him swallow a cold reality that she's only barely sipped on herself. ulterior motive or no, in that moment she became desperate to save him from making the same decision that kept her trapped beneath lumon's thumb for all those years. she knows what he is, her mind made his. but just like her, he wasn't ready to hear the truth. just like her, he turned his head and ran straight back into lumon's arms.

[wren-writes-stuff]

I don’t care that Mark S chose Helly and actually I’m so glad he took back some of his autonomy that way. Outie Mark, however unintentionally he meant it, insulted Mark S by calling Helly by the wrong name and comparing it to his own “more significant” relationship with Gemma. I’m GLAD he got his “fuck you, I’m a person too” moment.

But WHY could he not have just taken a single second to give some context to Gemma and make sure that she was safe before turning to Helly? You’re just gonna leave her in a (likely) camera-monitored stairwell to fend for herself? In a building full of people trying to capture her? Come ON.

I sincerely hope Outie Mark coordinated something off screen with cobel and Devon to help her get out of there bc oouugghhhh

[butchreg]

mama ! alicent hightower headcanons !!

requested by @apartfromgod . this is a little out of my depth as i don't really typically see alicent as a cg ( she's just an itty bitty baby to me :C ) but i do love her relationship with helaena && think of helly as a regressor who just wants her mama so drawing inspiration from dat . :03 let her cook !!

alicent is a bit hesitant to touch due to her past . she's not used to being shown affection which makes it hard for her to show it in return . she's a bit anxious when she first learns of your regression due to this — she wants to be a calming && safe presence for you but she's not really sure how to provide something she herself never really got .

she doesn't want to draw attention to your regression && potentially embarrass you so she lets you come to her . she's a bit shy about the topic at first , certainly not weirded out in a bad way but feeling confused as to why you would turn to her of all people for safety . at first you two don't acknowledge it much , you'll come to her , she'll brush your hair && let you ramble but she doesn't say much herself . as time goes on both of you relax around each other , slowly becoming more talkative && comfortable in your little routines .

alicent calls you sweetling , && my lovely . you love being her lovely , that makes you feel so special !!

you're obsessed with alicent's hair && alicent knows this . her hair is important to her && she doesn't let just anybody touch it . over the course of your relationship she slowly begins to allow you to brush && braid it , something that makes both of you feel safe && peaceful . if you yourself have long hair she loves to weave yours into the intricate styles that she learned as a girl.

alicent giving you baths , she's so sweet and gentle , humming softly as she helps you to wash your hair. she gets a bit shy not wanting to overstep , asking your permission before touching you each time she bathes you , checking in to make sure it's still okay as she slowly washes your entire body.

alicent sending away all of her ladies in waiting when you're regressed so you two can have privacy.

alicent goes rigid the first time you call her "mama" or anything of the sort. it all crashes down on her and she feels oh so guilty for everything. she asks you to leave, maybe a bit too loudly before breaking down entirely. it takes her a day or two before she's ready to see you again. both of you can't keep from apologizing profusely. you two have a long discussion about what happened where she explains that she needs time before using titles. she's willing to try you calling her anything but "mummy" as that's what aegon and helaena tend to call her. she's quite anxious that you won't trust her anymore after having this difficult conversation but it only brings you closer together. you two decide on you calling her ali and you even half jokingly suggest regression to her.

[kestrel-of-herran]

people claiming it's helena be so so so for real right now........ walk with me for a second now.......... it's called natural reitegration... this whole season helly and helena have been growing closer in goals and feelings. this last ep helly saw her dad and felt the resentment and fear helena experiences every day. both of her love mark and loathe the prison her life is. helly got from swearing she and helena have nothing in common to beginning to accept the whole of who she is, "i'm her."

selfishness is a natural human quality that lets you put your own needs first and take care of yourself and declare your life and wants equal or more important to those of others. she has no allegiance to the outies. the outies are like gods to both her and mark. they have the power to decide if helly and mark live or die.

and them choosing to claim ten minutes of agency is a celebration of autonomy and she WILL stare that god down and tell her to go fuck herself and that IS who helly is!!!

[illumoonated]

Severance S2 thoughts so far on the innie vs outie, nature vs nurture question.

***Spoilers***

I was struck by how much Irv's outie sounded like him. The same intonations and playfulness with Burt's outie as his innie had. Episode five really showed how much these innies and outies are the same people--truly arguing for nature over nurture at the moment.

I think people are both nature and nurture and I believe the show explores the grey areas brilliantly, but in episode five, I felt like I was watching "whole" characters and not just halves.

Innie Irving started the series as an earnest company sheep. He believed in Kier, Lumon, the "management" to such a degree that he'd tell on himself and his co-workers simply because he knows "Kier" would not approve. He drinks the proverbial punch. By episode five he is nearly identical to his outie: secretive, critical, outspoken, on a mission to find the exports hall, and distrustful of the entire Lumon mentality.

Innie Dylan started the series as a smart-ass, perk-seeking achiever. He believed in his own abilities, his intelligence, and is largely distrustful and territorial. By episode five he is unsure of his capabilities, feels like a failure, and especially wants to do right by his family (his wife, kids, and Irving). Like Dylan's wife said: he never quite "found his thing". Dylan thought he found his thing at Lumon. In season one, he still looked out for his co-workers by staying behind during OTC, but by episode five, innie Dylan is self-conscious and doubts himself and his value.

Innie Mark started the series as a perky, unbothered average joe. He did his job and that was that. He believed in Lumon's plan for the work, didn't ask questions unless it was to clarify that he was operating the "correct" way, and was open, albeit naively, about his emotions and thoughts. By episode five he is closed off, flippant, and distrustful of himself, Lumon, and his co-workers. He is angry and ready to blow his top just as outie Mark would. If you could not see outie Mark's personality shine through during Irv's "funeral" then I don't know which show you've been watching. Mark has engaged the same emotional repression outie Mark has.

Now, Helena is the only one who I think operates differently than the others. Helena becomes more like Helly rather than the other way around and it's fascinating. Helena started the series as a diligent, cold-blooded, dutiful daughter of Kier. She believed in her family's tradition, her protected status as an Eagan, and that she has "tempered" her emotions. By episode five, she is more like Helly than she cares to admit. Her anger is rising with heat rather than ice, she is vocal about her dissent in Lumon's plans (though, she's still going along with things for the moment), she fears Helly and her power over her life on the severed floor whereas in season one she felt totally in control.

Helena called the innies "animals" but I think she's at a point of desperation rather than hatred. She has lost control to the version of herself she deemed "wrong" -- the non-Lumon-friendly version.

Helly was loved for her authentic emotions. She achieved friendship, love, and purpose with the innies. On the outside, Helena is a mere prop for her family. And after living as an "innie" on the severed floor, Helena is coming to realize the personhood she was convinced she had over her innie.

Helena is coming to be more like Helly who, though trapped on the severed floor, is freer than she has ever been. She became playful (giving Irving his snow seal) adventurous (smiling in the tunnel with Mark on their way to the goats), outspoken (showing the picture of Gemma during the threat from Gwendolyn and the Goaties), emotive (touching Irving and telling him it's okay in one of the earlier episodes), and no, I do not think she was "trapping" Mark with the end goal of sex.

I don't think it's right but I don't think it was her or Lumon's goal. As far as the 'baby trap' theory goes: I don't think a company with so few scruples as Lumon would make a convoluted plan to get their heiress pregnant by some random worker is plausible when they could probably shut off Mark's brain/knock him out/steal some DNA instead.

I think Helena was nervous but exited to be around Mark. She waited for him to initiate a kiss in the hallway corner but didn't force him into one. She truly looked guilt-ridden when she told him she was sorry for being a distraction at the ORTBO. And again, I don't excuse her using Helly's identity in any way, but I truly do not think Helena rubbed her hands together after seeing the footage of Mark and Helly's kiss and said: "I'm going to ensnare this innie to have a baby with me."

Mark was her outlet to an expressive, honest love. But the issue here is, obviously, that Helena doesn't know how to be honest while being an Eagan.

Her laughter at the campfire shows how much Helly has been in her all along. She craves for the freedom Helly's emotions are given. Whether she'll realize it in time to do right by Mark, Dylan, and Irving is another thing entirely.

Mark, Dylan, and Irving are becoming like their outies where their true freedom lies. Helena is becoming like her innie where her true freedom lies.

[sukibenders]

I don't know but I'm little frustrated at how some people are painting the Severance finale, specifically that brief interaction between Helly and Gemma, and just making both of them seem catty.

Like, let's be honest, Helly, Helly R. in no way shape or form would fight over a man when she has other priorities. Miss girl has other things on her mind. I think her going to the stairwell wasn't even to try and get Mark to stay necessarily, as she looked surprised when he took her hand and led her away, but probably to just get one more second for herself because she believed that was their ending. Even the look she sends Gemma doesn't give the vibe of a woman celebrating taking someone else's man. As the show has told us, Helly was never cruel, so why would she be in that moment? I read as more of two things: 1.) Helly is sympathetic to Gemma in some way. She understood for a while that, outside of Lumon, Mark, or more so his outie, had/has a life and now, that Gemma is still alive, there's a chance that he'll want to get her back and she's been helping him get her [Gemma] back. Even outside of Gemma being Mark's outies wife, she generally was pushing for the mission even when others around her were hesitant because Helly is a good person. Now, however, she understands that with Mark's innie choosing her, his outie doesn't get to be with his wife who was kidnapped and tortured for two years. There's a melancholic feel to it all, even if she gets her happiness. 2.) Helly doesn't like outies, as we have been shown. Even if she was fighting to free Gemma, it was more so under the guise of freeing Ms. Casey because she was an innie like them. But now that Gemma is free, that's no longer the case as she's an outie. That look probably had more to do with that than it being about Mark. If s3 proves me wrong, I'll admit it, but for now, I'm sticking to this point.

Also, regarding Gemma and some believing that she doesn't know Mark has been severed and just thinks her husband chose another woman over her: I think Gemma, who even with gaps in her memory was still suspicious enough to question the place around her, immediately call out the doctor's bs lie and knock him unconscious enough to escape, was a literal Russian Lit professor, would be able enough to deduce what is going on once she's had time to collect herself after the ordeal. I'm pretty sure that she's aware, especially given the times when Mark switches expressions from loving to distant.

I don't know, maybe I just don't want to see two interesting female characters be narrowed down to being spiteful over a man.