#can't blame him for using the lord's name in vain

[technically-human]

Confessional... things get complicated when you're a ghost.

@i-am-as-normal-as-you-are asked for, and this is a literal quote, "R!Edwin going to a confessional (full angst)" so yeah... full angst indeed.

[maybanksbabe]

Little lamb sitting on rafe's face while with her panties in her mouth to bite down on to not make too much noise bc her father is hosting a backyard bbq with everyone in the church to celebrate little lamb's birthday (my birthday is tomorrow! So this is a little self indulgent)

Little lamb would be so nervous at first and double checks if the lock is locked and the window is covered completely so rafe says they don't have too but she interrupts him by kissing him & telling him that she NEEDS him "right now! Or I swear to God" rafe shakes his head, big ass smug smile on his face before looking back at her with his hands on his hips "didn't your daddy ever teach you to not use the lord's name in vain" she halts for a second "rafe i swear to-" he makes a sound of disapproval and then takes her hands in his and gently beings them up to his lips and kisses her knuckles before looking into her eyes, like she's got him in a trance "you swear to who?"

She's getting nervous again, she wasn't going to get punished again for being impatient but it's not like anyone can blame her especially when her 'secret boyfriend' looks at her like this. She can't say anything but look into his eyes as he brings her hands to his chest and then his shoulders as he bends down, on his knees kissing her thighs before speaking "you shouldn't use the lord's name in vain, you should pray that God forgives you for your impatient behavior or your naughty mouth" they both know what he means by 'naughty mouth'

He slides her panties off from under her beautiful sundress that the Cameron's (he told Sarah to gift it to little lamb for her birthday bc he knew papa lamb would never let her keep the dress that the 'godless delinquent' bought her) were so nice to her for her birthday, he looks at her face before looking at the cute cotton panties that are so wet he can feel it on his fingers as she's looking up at the ceiling. He's leading her to her bed, he sets her down before taking a seat himself with her soaking wet panties in his hands and kisses her some more while fingering her

Rafe is selfish almost by nature by now, but why should he be the only one to taste how good little lamb does right now "while you're at it, maybe you should pray that you won't be so loud like you were last time lamby" he stands up for a moment and kisses her. When he pulls away he slips his fingers gently into her mouth and revels in how she's instantly closes her eyes and sucks on his fingers, tasting herself on his fingers. He pulls out his fingers but uses his thumb to keep her mouth open, she tries to suck on that too but he stops her with a gentle yet stern look

"now, last time you got just a little too loud ok? So I'm going to stick your panties in your mouth to give you something bite down on" rafe knows fully well that she loves to bite, hopefully her panties will muffle her moans if not maybe just a little bit "do you feel comfortable with that little lamb?" He let's go of her mouth to let her speak but all she does is nods her head "words, lamby, we use our words when we do stuff like this" he lightly scolds her for a moment "I'm ok with it, I swear" he nods approvingly "good girl Bambi, now I'm gonna lay on the bed and you're going to sit on my face you got that? And I mean sit not hover" he looks at her for any kind of acknowledgement of what he said "sit not hover got it" she grabs her panties and waits for rafe to lay down on her bed

Once he's laying down little lamb climbs on top of him, she looks at rafe silently asking if this is really what he wanted and he nods with a smile on his face "you won't hurt me, I swear" he chuckles slightly and kisses her thigh "ok...I trust you" she says like there isn't a subtle shake in her voice "don't forget about where to put your panties, little lamb" she puts them in her mouth and hesitantly sits on his face, he goes slow at first. But when she's feeling less anxious to feeling confident enough to practically riding his face does he starts eating her out like a man starved. She lays her hand on his, his hands are on her thighs so he decides to take her hands into his when she let's him.

Oh my god -

Oh my god wait a minute I need to catch my breath -

HIM TELLING HER WHAT SHE SHOULD PRAY FOR?!!!? GETTING HER TO SIT ON HIS FACE WITH EVERYONE ELSE OUTSIDE???

[the-firebird69]

There are a few more things that are not right and they're here in this little village we need to fix them and we're going about and we're trying to get it done and we're getting obstructed by certain individuals we need them to stop doing that and we're telling people who they are and what they're doing and they're rude and crude and nasty and dumb and have a plan to take over everything and they're not going to stop until they're out of here no we hear it now too they knocked out the fleet so we can just sit around bothering you taking stuff that's what they're saying they don't want to run their plan until they have what they need and stuff like that so they really wanted to sit around for a while and not run it and we are going to start shutting that window we need them to do that and we're going to close the window on them and they will not like it and yeah several movies happened before it and they're not going to like that either and he goes on all these trips and his nailed and all those people getting nailed and it's a bit slower than people expected without a fleet but he is ringing everything and they can see it already and to see it a lot more in the next few days now he does go through the Lord of the rings and he goes to the watchmen and he does all this horrific stuff and it is him and it doesn't take very long a couple weeks and then he's gone while it's happening he is getting kicked out of here and physically too all of his people they saw him going back and forth now they're capturing them and they're not releasing them and it's because of pseudo empire is in charge and they're doing most of it BJ gets blamed and he starts doing it then he gets blamed and he starts doing it and it's awful he's not one protect people and he's out to lunch jackass and he's very evil to our son most of the time we're not paying attention to him and no we are but we're giving him scrutiny or not helping the idiot. And we have a lot of programs that are starting. One of them is to watch and monitor these people in the right way we're not giving him a fair shake and he wants them out he's been saying it there just terrorists it's coming up movie blindsided because we think they're working for us and it's evil very evil and we are going to change that and today we're putting an effort in and we want people in and we will have a discussion and we're going to go through it and now we understand they say but no you will there's a couple other things

-if you are our people you're not to use our names in vain at all if they're forcing it we want to see it

-these people use his name in vain so many times it's making everyone angry I want you angry but I want you to do stuff to stop them it's illegal for them to do and she is under dress and I want it fixed I want us to do work here this place is busting at the seams with Intel on stashes and caches we need and we have to start doing work real work if you're tied up and you're bound I want to hear about it

-we have a lot of stuff to do but this is where it's all at this is the main game we're just starting into the big time and we need to be a lot more alert and a lot quicker and we need to cut out all the fat and I trim it out and more and I believe it's the correct thing to do all these people are doing a distracting and we can't put our thumb on people and we used to do that a lot

-furthermore the two are doing okay they have successful projects they have successful businesses and creatures but they are hurting and they're separated and these people have them under house arrest both of them and that's the morlock and we don't like it it's very evil to them but it could take a while and it's disgusting so we have to get to work and try and make it more pleasant the more you do that the more advances we make

That's what I had to say

Duke nukem Blockbuster he says very good and I know what it means and she says it too and they both says it means very good

And that was Duke and Blockbuster very helpful and very helpful people and we are going through it now it's Duke nukem and they spelled the name wrong on purpose we are going to help him and provide things and they know about it and are working with us. One of them is going to come by mail. Yes. And yes he's getting a monthly check. But we are anticipating somebody to try the IRS and other program when the initialize it people will be investigated and they want to use it on the molar not the other way around and that's why the morlock are not doing it because they're guilty of all these crimes even though it was Mac money that they were holding on to they don't even know that's the case and they're going to get beaten up for that real soon I'm actually starting to try and take it and it is very deadly stuff and tons of fighting ensues. We have other work that we're doing and we are going to go ahead and do it but we do have a plan to help him out with things one of them has begun and he is going to go all over the world doing stuff and yeah eventually gets evicted and finds he can't get back it starts pretty soon because he has no ships and Tommy f hates him the pseudo empire hated him the empire and foreigners we don't like him either and everybody keeps him out and we can use ships and he can't do anything about it and bja too and believe it or not he will be evicted fairly soon and by others and a crazy huge fight and he does get killed this grievous because of it and he goes on again back in his own body and he does a couple movies then he does Passion of the Christ and he leaves supposedly a similar route and he ends up on Titan and we think that it's Prometheus the movie and he decides to wear a suit and he's still not contained cuz he always has a helmet opened and his big mouth but he ends up going and that's coming up soon and he wants to go have Chinese food he says and Hera is thinking about it and he doesn't want you to have crab rangoon and for crying out loud it's supposed to be helpful and yes it is cuz they eat people and people got it and fish it has to be from a farm and it kind of s***** but that will change the bugs in the water will change soon is thanking me doesn't know what it is that does need some assistance yes and Ronald be really likes you driving around with not enough money for gas but he did say you need a backup and that's what he's thinking about so we are going to try to arrange things for you to do to have some extra money and people are into it like Jason and $20 is not working social security doesn't give a s*** that's what they said they don't listen to him and they start beating him up there's more we are at war with a whole bunch of people Saturn is is very stick wicked and it will change pretty soon foreigners are going to them and miscellaneous and warlock and they're getting information here they're invading down below and they're going to start taking their ground bases which are preventing them from doing something about Saturn there's a full-blown war and we need people all of us to sign on and this is the apocalypse and and we will start using the right language it is Armageddon as well

Uriel and Goddess wife are we of saying it is is the year of the dragon it means the dragon is awakened in aroused and brought out and he is a risen and our son has a plan to try and help our daughter remove Godzilla who is underneath him it's one of them and the original is in the island chain in Hawaii it's a sign when she is awakened for the others to come out we are going ahead and we're going to help that happen and she is a terror and he says just like her around the house and she was nice and calm and quiet but yeah she was kind of getting mad at him and tell him and go off and steam and they both do that it's going to be an attorney that she says he says yeah I guess okay

We're here too and we're here we're getting ready all of us are this is going to be a wonderful event and the closing of our project at this particular phase 2 portion is going to be intense we're ahead of time we're ahead of schedule and we know why it's due to recruiting more people and we're going to say it now and in the future and forever and we thank our son and daughter for pushing it and now we see why it sounds odd a little but they can't help it but we know what they're saying we need help and we need it now and our people know how to help people so we're going to hire and we're going to hire now today I do thank you all for your attention

God and goddess of China the Chan family and the Lynn family and we'll fix the spelling

We are looking forward to speaking and ours want to say something we are providing you a message that our time to hear is short and we must fight to get what we want we need to get everything we can and every inch matters and these two always say it and sometimes we don't act it it's because of projects are huge and he says it too we have a lot of those things in our face and he has some of it but not really much and he is poor destitute and in trouble and we are too he doesn't have separate income and they won't let it and we need to fight

Poseidon and got his wife and it affects us it affects our people and they're in a similar situation we have to work out of it and we have to do it now

God and goddess of Japan and yes Toyota and Nissan families

We are in trouble we're in dire straits and we have to get out of here and we need to evacuate and we need assistance

Islands of Asia gods and goddesses

We're going to assist we're going to organize it today and it's a monster we need to do it now

Olympus

[deathc-re]

up late

characters : usopp x gn!reader

warnings : suggestive towards the end ig? not proof read i'm writing this at 4am

an : short little fluff. i'm not the biggest usopp simp but i love him all the same. yk this started out as a head canon post for multiple characters but then i got carried away 💀

you couldn't sleep, you had tossed and turned in your bed for the past hour. you weren't tired enough to sleep but didn't have enough energy to go work out so you opted for just sitting on the deck.

you leaned again the railing, looking out into the darkness of the ocean night. the moon was out, a shinning crescent reflecting off the rippling waves. you sighed, what a beautiful night.

usopp is a light sleeper so having heard movement outside on the deck woke him up immediately. the unusual cricking of the floor boards didn't sit right with him. it made the hairs at the back of his neck stand up.

he sat up and looked around, letting his eyes adjust to the dark room. everyone in the boys room was accounted for. sanji, zoro, luffy, brook, franky, and chopper.

damnit, he thought, who the hell could be out there this late?

climbing outta bed he tried and failed to wake up zoro. he knew zoro was his best bet because if he woke up anyone else, they'd make a fuss, and that would wake up the rest of them, who would also make a fuss, then everyone on the ship would be awake and blame him if it really turned out to be nothing but the wind.

with a sigh and several minutes of internally pumping himself up he went to go check. when he peaked out the door to look he saw you and relaxed greatly; before again freezing. it took everything in him not to gasp. you looked gorgeous, the moonlight shining on your skin made it seem like you are glowing. an angel sent from the heavens just for him to witness.

he walked out of the room and let the door click closed behind him. you looked back at the sudden noise.

"oh no! sorry usopp did i wake you?" you asked, apology already written all over your face. he smiled at the ground, walking over to you.

"yeah but it's ok. what's wrong? can't sleep?" he asked, assuming the same position as your before.

"nope."

"d'ya know why?"

"nope."

"hm..."

the two of you sat in silence for a while. just listening to the sound of the waves hitting the side of the ship.

"want me to tell you a story?" he asked suddenly, looking at you.

you smiled a small smile and nodded.

"alright let's see. what marvelous adventure would you like to hear?"

you chuckled and leaned your head onto his shoulder. moving closer so you were body to body. his cheeks grew warm and a wobbly smile rose to his face.

"uh h-how about the time i saved a dear crew mate of mine from a horrid monster." he started.

"oh yeah? what kind of monster?" you asked, amused.

"the monster of boredom!" he laughed, albeit forced.

"you're such a dork." you said with a snicker.

"but i did saved you didn't i?" he looked down at you, brow raised even though his question was rhetorical.

"yeah sure, god usopp."

"hey! don't use the lords name in vain!" he chuckled.

as the giggling died down you fell back into another calm silence and stayed like the for a while. then you shivered, just slightly, but he took notice.

he wrapped an arm around your shoulder and pulled you into his chest. you looked up at him and made direct eye contact.

"y'know it's cold out. you should have put on a sweater." he said, voice low, dangerously low.

"oh yeah?" you asked, letting your eyes flicker to his lips for just a second.

"mhm..." he hummed, dragging it out as he searched your eyes.

"wanna keep me warm then?"

[lazypeachsoul]

you promise?

Request: by anon “Could you write an Osferth drabble. About anything you'd like. Please and thank you.”

Warnings: Nothing.

Word count: 1,8k

A/N: Here's the first fic for The Last Kingdom Week! Hope you enjoy some sweet baby monk. I might have gone overboard with this story, but I can't help it when it comes to osferth. Enjoy 🌼

The streets of Cookham were bustling with workers returning home from the fields that surrounded the village. Thanks to Lord Uhtred and his fame the once forgotten town had become a stop for every merchant that traveled through Wessex and the workload had increased. And you were no different than any of those other people.

The sun was now setting and it was your time to return the children you minded back to their homes, where their overworked parents would take care of them. It wasn’t normal for common workers to have child minders, normally leaving the kids at home with their mothers, but Cookham was busier than ever and women were working the fields too. And that left you to take care of the little rascals that lived in town.

You had tried to work as a seamstress and at the alehouse, but nothing seemed to really suit you. Well, at least until you started taking care of the kids. You didn’t get much pay since the people you worked for were underpaid to begin with, but the little you got you saved for a new fabric, or a sweet treat or for those times you would meet Osferth at the alehouse and you wanted to prove him that you were a hard working woman.

And how you loved those times. Osferth seemed to always be busy either training or meeting with the rest of what had now been named the “Cookham squad”. Lord Uhtred and his loyal warriors were the talk of all Wessex and a great source of gossip for the entire town. Lord Uhtred and his beautiful wife Gisela took care of the people that lived inside their walls. Then there was Finan, the loud irishman who seemed to bring joy and fun to any occasion celebrated, always close to him was Sihtric, the mysterious dane who didn’t speak much but said a lot with just a look. And the last one was the monk who is not really a monk Osferth.

When you first met him you were trying to learn to become a barmaid and accidentally tripped on his foot, sending a pitcher of ale flying everywhere and leaving you both embarrassed and asking for mutual forgiveness. Since that moment, you had started to meet together at the alehouse every few days, providing you with a nice friendship but keeping all the rules a respectable young unmarried woman should follow.

And that’s exactly where you were headed after dropping your last child at home with his grateful mother. Your heart skipped a beat when you saw the familiar blonde mop of hair sitting on one of the outside benches, and you had to admit to yourself that maybe it was more than just casual meetings at the alehouse. At that moment Osferth turned around and waved in your direction and with a small wave you made your way to the bench, sitting in front of him.

“I thought you didn’t see me, you looked distracted.” Osferth's sweet voice spoke and you had to admit he was right, you almost missed it because of your constant daydreaming about the man. But you couldn’t admit that.

“Excuse me, the children were wild and I’m extremely tired. Must be because of the nice weather.”

“Maybe we should meet another day, I wouldn’t want to tire you more Lady-” “No!”

You hadn’t been able to stop the agitated answer from coming out when you heard his dismissal. You were tired but never too tired to stop meeting Osferth. You could feel your cheeks hot with embarrassment and you tried to clear your throat to diffuse the tension.

“I mean, I would rather stay here with you and relax with a friend.”

Osferth’s face seemed to harden at your words but as soon as the barmaid brought you two cups of ale everything seemed to go back to normal, except for a small curious voice at the back of your head wanting to know why the expression changed.

“A friend. Of course. I enjoy the time we spend together too.” He nodded his head, his blonde hair falling in front of his eyes before taking a sip from his cup. “The weather is really nice so I wouldn’t blame the children. Lord Uhtred told us that the weather would turn nicer before we leave.”

You felt the ale you had been drinking get stuck in your throat but you tried to conceal it with a soft cough so as to not cause a scene in the packed alehouse. Leave? They were leaving?

“Are you leaving soon? You didn’t say anything before.”

“Lord Uhtred just confirmed it this morning. The King has requested the Lord’s help in some negotiations with the danes. He thought it best for us to accompany him since his history with the king is not the most amicable.”

You nodded along as he spoke but your brain was overworking itself trying to comprehend the situation. They were leaving to assist the King of Wessex and they would leave Cookham unattended for God knows how long. Of course the real reason you were worried was not the village, Lady Gisela could take care of it and more without a problem, you were worried about Osferth and you. Was there even an 'Osferth and you' to worry about?

“That’s...great that the King and our Lord are speaking again. Maybe it might help us get resources from the crown.” You tried to excuse your previous silence but it must have been obvious you were deep in thought because Osferth looked at you with a curious face. “And when are you leaving?”

“We’re expected to depart tomorrow morning. Apparently those matters are very important and require us to be there as soon as possible.” He shrugged in a move to downplay the entire situation.

Silence was the only thing that could be heard from your side of the bench, a deep contrast from the rest of the groups happily chatting and drinking. The table was silent but your mind was not, still overthinking every word your companion had said. You were overthinking so much that you almost missed his quiet voice.

“I am going to miss you.” Osferth spoke and as soon as you looked at him again he seemed to flush. “And our conversations. Or friendly conversations as...friends.”

You wanted to laugh at the poor man in front of you. In the many months you had known Osferth you had never seen him that flustered in his life, cheeks and ears bright red and a stuttering mess.

“I’m going to miss you too Osferth. And our friendly meetings.” You placed your hand next to his on the table next to his, not wanting to overstep and make the poor man more uncomfortable.

He moved his hand carefully almost imperceptibly until his fingers touched yours and a warm feeling ran down your entire arm from your hand. He seemed to be the one deep in thought at the moment and you almost wished you could pick at his brain to see what was going on. Is that how he felt every time you zoned out?

“Maybe you could remember me-” “Of course I’m going to remember you Osferth, don’t be silly. You are not going to war, only a mission for the king.”

A nervous chuckle was the only thing he could let out now and his reactions were starting to worry you a bit. If it was only a small trip he shouldn't have been that nervous.

“Let me finish. Maybe if I gave you something that you could remember me by, it would be easier.”

“You don’t have to do that, Osferth. I will remember you anyways.” You tried to reason with him but you couldn’t stop him from moving to look for something in the pockets of his robes.

After a bit of fussing with the robes he placed his closed fist on top of your hand, opening it just enough for something small and metallic to fall into your hand. Moving your hand closer you found a small fragile chain that seemed to have been at least as old as you.

“It’s not much, just a scrap of metal if you try to sell it. But it was my mother’s, the only thing I have from her. I hid it from the monks when I was growing up so they wouldn’t take it away. Carried it into battle with me every time I’ve fought too.”

Every single word of the explanation seemed to make your throat close a bit more and your eyes glossier. You knew Osferth had no real memories with his mother and you could imagine how important that bracelet must have been for him.

“I can’t accept it, it’s so important to you. Why would you give it to me?” You debated with your head shaking and trying to push the chain into his hand again. “Don’t be silly, Osferth. It’s your mother’s bracelet.”

“You must keep it. Please.” He kept his fist tightly closed to avoid you giving him back the piece of jewelry. “I want you to have it.”

“But I don’t have anything to give you in return.”

You kept trying to pry his fist open, all in vain because he wouldn’t even budge. You wanted to get up and hug him for such a meaningful gesture and hit him at the same time for wanting to part with such a meaningful piece.

“You have.” He spoke, grabbing your hand and halting your movements. “Maybe you can give me your promise.”

You looked at him curiously at what his proposal might be. Maybe he just wanted you to take care of Lady Gisela, you knew how he saw her as the mother he never had. Or maybe he wanted you to care for Lord Uhtred’s children.

“You can promise me that once I’m back from Wincester you will allow me to properly court you.” He explained and you felt your heart stop. “I-If you want, of course.”

Courting Osferth was not something you had thought about, mainly because you had nothing to offer. Your parents didn’t have fields or many resources they could offer a prospective husband. And Osferth was a warrior, so you thought settling down seemed to be out of the picture for him. But you had to admit the idea made your stomach turn in the best way possible.

You realized you had been thinking for a long time and still hadn’t given an answer when you felt him squeezing your hand. Could you promise him something like that?

“I promise.” Of course you could, the idea of a lifetime with Osferth only made you more excited about life. “Only you have to promise me to come back soon.”

He nodded with enthusiasm, moving his hands to take the small chain from your delicate hand and clasp it around your wrist. This mission hadn’t even started and you already wanted it to end.

Taglist: @webreathfandoms @thebohemianpenguin @emilyhufflepufftlk @solinarimoon

[punkscowardschampions]

Lux & Dash

Lux: Hey 😊 Lux: wanna hang out today? Dash: Bummer! There's no way Dash: I promised Sapphire we'd hang Lux: Can't I come with? What are you doing? Dash: she wouldn't be down Dash: you get the picture, yeah? Lux: I don't think I know Sapphire...? Dash: she has a groovy Cleopatra vibe Lux: 🐍🐍🐍 love that Lux: you gonna be Marc or Julius? Dash: Who did she dig more? Lux: You're more of the Antony type Lux: they had their own drinking club called inimitable livers Lux: and they played pranks on people in disguise Dash: Right on! Lux: I hope your love affair doesn't end in such dire circumstances Dash: it'll be outta sight, don't sweat it Dash: she's made loads of her own promises back Lux: She's not the sister of anyone is she? Dash: Onyx but he's cool Lux: Hmm, actually, my point is moot regardless, if she's Cleopatra, it's Octavia's brother you need to worry about Lux: Cleo could 💀 her own Lux: never mind then, you should be fine 😁 Dash: you know how to lay a real trip, huh? Dash: I almost forgot Lux: forgot about Marcus Antonius?! Lux: don't wanna be doomed to repeat it, Dashiel, think on Dash: no doom in my 🔮 babe Lux: 🌈✨ good times Dash: that's more the shit to 🗨 into being Lux: I don't think you can blame the eventual fall of Rome on me being in your inbox when you'd rather I weren't 😄 Dash: No blame, I just gotta do my own thing Lux: do you think any of us can ever be unique Dash: Beats me, that's heavy 💭 Lux: I thought that's what you were getting at Lux: Bummer Lux: I'll ask around Dash: I'm not trying to get into anything with you Dash: later, maybe Lux: You aren't going to have an answer for me later Lux: Don't sweat it, Dash Dash: if you wanna go ahead & cut me some slack I'll have magic for you Dash: just not now Lux: It doesn't matter Lux: I want conversation and someone to hang with, you want neither, that's chill Dash: what you want isn't a bad scene but it's not mine Dash: I can turn you onto someone whose it is, you'll have a blast Lux: that's okay ✌ Lux: I'll make my own friends, continue to Dash: Cool Lux: godspeed 🚀 I will let you know my findings 🗳📋 Dash: you know where to find me to lay whatever you want on me Dash: 🍎🍏🌳 Lux: what do you like most about 🍎🍏🌳 there Dash: 👀 Lux: good answer Lux: the ☀ looks best through 🍃🌳🍂 Dash: & the sky looks 🍒 from that high Lux: 🍒🥧 sounds good Dash: I'm hip to that Lux: does that mean you're going to make one? Lux: I'll get the 🍨 a la mode or nothing baby Dash: you're the girl, why aren't you making it? Lux: ha, I wasn't raised one though, so that kind of nonsense does not work on me 😅 Lux: I like brown sugar and cinnamon on the top please Dash: I'll find a 🐤 who's not wise to it & pass that on Dash: but they won't be fitting an apron how you would ✨ Lux: I don't want deception pie Lux: it will taste all the bitter for it 😖😖😖 yuck yuck yuck Dash: I'll pick the 🍏🍎🍐🍊🍋🍌🍉🍇🍓🍈🍒🍑 for it Dash: keep it sweet & honest Lux: make me a basket Lux: that way you get to be sweet and I don't have to participate in any misogyny for baked goods Dash: What's with the goddess demands when you know I've got demands on my time? Lux: you're so busy, right? Dash: 🚀🪐💫 Dash: I can't be weaving you a basket like it's no biggie Lux: well that is not what I meant 😏 Lux: but if you can't handle it then I'm sure I'll manage just fine Dash: weave a 🐤 a basket and she's 💖 for a day, teach her to basket weave... Lux: how very like a man to claim mastery over a skill women for centuries just did because they had to Lux: you had your chance to be 👏 over your pastry making expertise but you declined Dash: how righteous of you to keep the faith on that belief but yo, can you do it? I can Dash: declining everything I can teach you is a bad trip to be on Dash: you said you weren't down to feast on bitter fruit, that's gotta include sour 🍇 baby Lux: It's a very wholesome past life you've painted for me if I somehow acquired that skill Lux: certainly a prettier picture than the truth alas Lux: I haven't declined any invitation Lux: that's you Dash: I haven't either Dash: There's a time & a place for us to reconnect Dash: after Sapphire's Dash: & Lotus' Lux: your schedule isn't going to dictate mine Lux: we'll see when that time is Lux: 🌍🌌💫 willing Dash: come & 👀 me then Dash: it'll be unreal again Lux: you want me to watch you from the nearest 🍎🍏🌳? Dash: or 🌌 til the 7th day of the 7th month if you still vibe with that story Lux: That's an interesting way to inquire about my faith Lux: you'd make an excellent youth pastor Lux: 🤭 Dash: you've heard me play 🎸 Lux: and your cool lingo Lux: yep, it is indeed your calling Lux: we'll start your bible study as soon as the 🌍 is ready Dash: sounds like a drag Dash: how are we gonna make it fun? Lux: 🍪🍪🥛 and fellow youths, duh Dash: if you're gonna teach me it needs to be visual Dash: that's my way Lux: really? Lux: well, I'm going to need all my creativity and crafting skills to recreate Noah's Ark Dash: Moses'll be easy, I'll weave a basket for real Dash: he's the one, yeah? 👶 Lux: that's him Lux: have a whole cast of 👶 to choose from Dash: & animals Lux: I'll just try to avoid being like Sarah and 👊 all the mothers in envy Lux: not a good look Dash: I can get you a baby 🐈 if it'll keep the peace Lux: 😄 it'd be a whole other story if that's what Abraham had done Dash: he coulda taken 5 & let me 🛹⚡️ to my nan's place Lux: a man who marries his sister and needs to populate the 🌍 ain't got no time to chill, Dashiel Dash: the more you tell me, the more he fits into my family 🌳 Lux: 🤨 🧐 Lux: you're holy too? Dash: last time we got together you seemed to 💭👀🗨 so Lux: false prophets hold a certain amount of appeal, of course Dash: what was false? Lux: well, it's not for me to say you weren't speaking the word of God, I suppose Lux: but it's also a big no-no to worship false idols, it's in the big 10, so Lux: very tricky, actually Dash: Do you want me to try & make amends or what's left of the other 9? Lux: How many of do you think you've broken today? Dash: tell me what they are Lux Thou shalt have no other gods before me Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain Remember the sabbath day, to keep it holy Honour thy father and thy mother Thou shalt not murder Thou shalt not commit adultery Thou shalt not steal Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbour Thou shalt not covet Lux: score out of 10 please Dash: what's a graven image? Lux: that's the idol part Dash: right on, I don't have time to like carve a statue of you & worship it but the intent is there Dash: no adultery or murder either, but the rest Lux: well Lux: consider me appalled not shocked 😳 Dash: what's your score? Lux: 3, I think Dash: you covet the fruit for a pie & Lux: Yes 😘 Lux: and I am not honouring my father or mother and I've put myself before god so Lux: I think those are the only ones, though arguably referring to myself like that is taking it in vain but I wasn't the first one to say it Dash: that's the shit you should ask around about 🗳📋 /10 Lux: maybe I'll do weekly questionnaires Lux: no one else is as mad as you were to be compared to Mark Antony but A LOT of people think we're all ❄️ Dash: beauty enough for ❄ & false idols Lux: Sculpture isn't my forte but I'll do my best Lux: you'll have to stand still long enough for me to 👀 Dash: I don't think I can Dash: we're poetry in motion, I know you felt it Lux: I'm not in the business of denying what I feel Dash: you haven't grown a totally different head since I last 👀 you Lux: now that WOULD be impressive Lux: stuck with this one only Dash: stuck makes it sound like that's a bummer Dash: looking how you do could NEVER be a drag Lux: you've not lost your charm either Dash: every compliment I've given you before, I would give you today Lux: damn timing Dash: Meet me under the 🌙? Lux: I shan't turn into a 🎃 Dash: I won't turn into a 🐀 Lux: then I don't see why not Dash: Then I'll be waiting for you Lux: Patiently? Dash: you already know that's not one of my virtues Lux: 😇 takes a lot of hard work Dash: you're the 👼 Lux: I do like hearing it Dash: I'll write you another song Lux: you keep writing songs for everyone, no wonder you've got no time Dash: school's that much of a hassle, it's that or crash 💤 Lux: what don't you like about it? Dash: I don't like anything about it Dash: nothing radical ever happens Dash: & there's way more commandments than 10 Dash: I could be spending my time here on the farm, helping things run smooth Lux: Hmm Lux: Interesting Dash: I read, I know shit Dash: I can write and do maths Dash: understand people Lux: and you feel like that's all school has to offer you? Dash: I don't see why I have to do x or y number of years more in an institution Dash: there's nothing I can get there that I can't get in the 🌍 Lux: I'll add it to my survey ideas Dash: 🤯💭 Lux: 🐝🧠 or 🎨🧠 Lux: only time will tell Dash: I'm hip to it being about getting out of just being around the same 🐈 & 🐤 Dash: meeting people with different vibes who you probably won't dig Dash: but I've got my bro for that Lux: the footballer Lux: I remember Dash: my dad & his piece too, they're drags in the same way Lux: what do you bond with your dad over? Dash: I don't Lux: is it like school and you're not bothered though Lux: or is it a shame Dash: Do I 🌠 he 👀 me? Used to Dash: not a rush I need to chase now Lux: I get it Dash: He's got the ⚽🏆 son he wants & I've got a family here Lux: it's not a good enough replacement though, is it Lux: no matter how nice people are here, or wherever I end up next and after that Lux: I'm never going to hear the people I grew up with, who loved and raised me, call me by the right name Lux: or daughter, or sister Dash: You're not gonna stay? Lux: this place was made for moving out, right? Lux: it's transient Dash: they can love you, raise you, you don't have to split Lux: I've been raised but Lux: I get what you're saying Lux: when I put roots down again Lux: it needs to be for keeps Dash: this can be for keeps Dash: it is for me Lux: we had some travellers at my daddy's church for a while Lux: 'til they got moved on Lux: places like this Lux: it's never forever Dash: What's forever? Not my parents marriage or my dad's football career Dash: if we have to go we go together, all of us Dash: new buildings maybe but the same family Lux: I'm glad that you have that Dash: you can Dash: you're welcome & wanted Dash: nobody here is related to me by blood but we're still connected Lux: I know, everyone has been very welcoming Lux: on the whole Dash: you can get comfortable, this place has been here years Lux: alright Lux: anyway, didn't Cleopatra show yet? Dash: She'll be waiting for a mirror Lux: huh? Dash: she's not cool with coming to me before checking what she looks like Dash: as if I've never 👀 her Lux: doesn't it feel Lux: Abraham and Sarah vibes Dash: what do you mean? Lux: incestuous Lux: because you say they're your family Lux: but you sleep with them Dash: she won't stay Dash: a tourist Lux: and you only sleep with the ones that won't stay Dash: they sleep with me, it's part of the tour Dash: you remember Lux: Cool speech there then Dash: I don't always get it right, like Dash: I thought that was your vibe, it's not Lux: no, you were exactly right Dash: Lux, come on Lux: it's family to you Lux: you don't care about the endless stream of fucked up girls who can cross here off their nowhere left to go list Lux: what they might be searching for Lux: never mind you actually have a home, somewhere you could be Lux: I was beyond wrong about you Dash: Don't fucking frame it like that Lux: 'cos you did a brilliant job with your narrative Lux: part of the tour, give me a fucking break Lux: you know, you aren't superior because you choose to be here, it's the opposite Lux: what kind of person lords that over people who have no choice, nowhere else they can be Lux: what the fuck Dash: that's not what I'm doing, chill out Lux: just don't Lux: you have no justification, you have no reason Lux: and clearly whatever you are doing here is going unchecked so whatever Lux: I'll be gone soon, but just know, I fucking see you Dash: I told you before we started, you set the pace, everything we did we both wanted to do Dash: nothing I do needs to be checked Lux: so you're that guy Lux: it isn't only bad if it's some serial killer down an alley and the girl is screaming and crying no Dash: You're making this way heavier than it is Lux: You don't get to tell me what I'm making it Dash: I don't get why you're twisting everything Lux: I haven't twisted anything Dash: we had fun, you said you liked me Lux: this isn't a straight issue of consent Lux: it's the fact that I know you knew I was vulnerable, I told you things, why I was here Lux: and you think it's acceptable to fuck people who are in that position, and you can't deny it because you literally did it to me, because, you know, they won't be here long Lux: and to have the nerve to advertise this place, these people, yourself, as a fucking safe space Lux: family Lux: that is insanely fucked up, I don't know how no one has ever told you that Dash: you can back off this witch hunt, yeah? Dash: you're not the same as Sapphire or Amber or Lotus or whoever Dash: they don't tell me things, it's not the fucking same Lux: Well I'm definitely sorry I did Dash: that's all been shallow, this got deep, you know Lux: I don't think I know anything about you Lux: not really Dash: You're just flipping out, I flipped you out Dash: but I didn't mean to & you don't mean that Lux: I just need to not be here right now Dash: Lux Lux: It's fine Lux: I mean, it's not Lux: but I'm leaving the main house to go for a walk, so just don't let me see you, okay Dash: You're not gonna tell anyone, are you? Lux: excuse me? Dash: all that shit you said about how it's not a safe space Lux: who the hell do I have to tell? Lux: and that's the worst part Dash: There's loads of people you could, but it's not true Lux: for a second there, you almost sounded like you gave a shit Lux: places like this will always exist, I'm not under any illusion I can stamp them all out Dash: I do! Dash: maybe I fucked up but that's not the farm's fault Lux: I'm not going to the cops, I have nothing to tell Dash: my head didn't go there, there's loads of good people here, doing beautiful things Dash: if I'm not one of them, that'll be my karma Dash: you don't have to leave Lux: I'm not Lux: that's your karma Lux: someone needs to stick around so there's some sense of consequence for your actions Dash: you don't have to go full avenging 👼 on me Dash: I won't be going heavy on you Lux: It's not a joke, Dash Dash: I'm not 🤡ing Dash: nothing uncool needs to happen between us, I'll give you space or whatever Lux: You're afraid Lux: aren't you Lux: that if I tell what you're like, girls like Cleopatra won't go near you anymore Lux: Jesus Christ Dash: I don't need to be afraid of that, I told you, we're all having fun Dash: there's no big soap opera vibe Lux: Fuck off now Dash: Ask Amber, she was mad at me before you but not like that, you've got this wrong Lux: I haven't got anything wrong Lux: this is what you did, to me, that's the end of Lux: you can tell yourself what you like about the rest, that's no concern of mine Dash: Nah, we talked about it, how I've done shit before that's 💔 & you said you didn't care Dash: that I couldn't hurt you Dash: & that you could tell I wasn't a bad person Dash: Why are you just taking it all back like none of that fucking happened? Lux: Why did you prove me wrong in such spectacular fashion? Lux: there's a reason you prefer keeping things shallow, and this is it Lux: if the answer isn't a yes or it's cool, you don't want to know, you don't want to be checked Dash: The reason I keep things shallow is they're on a fly by, they don't want to stay & I don't wanna be connected to someone else that'll split on me Lux: you aren't the gatekeeper of this place Lux: and nothing's forever, by your own admission Dash: I am of myself & I do my own fucking checks, yeah? Maybe you don't have a heart left to break by your own admission but I'm protecting the one you don't believe I've got, like Lux: There's no world in which I'm feeling sorry for you right now, okay Lux: you do not vet every girl you fuck for her tragic backstory, cut the crap Dash: Gimme a break, I said talking isn't usually part of it, going both ways, wouldn't be very chill or shallow if it was Lux: Yeah, like I said, you don't care Lux: and that's your lookout Lux: but to give it that faux hippie bullshit about family and welcoming, when you mean only for yourself, fucking sucks Lux: don't bother pretending, just be honest Dash: it happened different with you, that's the honest truth Dash: search me why Lux: right Lux: I wasn't born yesterday Dash: I do care Lux: you should be a better friend Lux: to these people, the ones you care about Dash: yeah Lux: that's all I have to say Dash: I'll cool it too then Lux: I don't think you're evil Lux: but I don't think you're a good person now Dash: I can't change your mind? Lux: Of course you can Dash: by doing what? Lux: by being a good person or a bad Dash: Beats me how that's getting judged when everyone else already thinks I'm being a good person except you & my bro Lux: don't confuse people not caring either way for approval of your actions Dash: you want me to care more for people who don't, nothing confusing about that Lux: I said being good wasn't easy Dash: & responsibility isn't my bag, he takes all that on Lux: there we go then Lux: I'm not expecting anything Dash: like I said, I'm not giving you anything but space Lux: Whatever Lux: Goodbye Dash: I'm sorry we read each other wrong Dash: it hasn't happened before Lux: It's happened plenty before Lux: they leave Lux: your behaviour and attitude is bullshit and I won't be apologising to you Dash: chill, you've made your point Lux: it's not about making it, it's about you understanding Lux: but why the fuck should I care, actually Lux: you're right, way too confusing, way too hard, no point Dash: get out of here then Dash: I don't understand & you don't care Lux: I'm not leaving, remember Lux: and that's the fucking point, you'll have to get used to feeling uncomfortable with it Dash: you can split conversationally, was more the vibe Lux: no, Dash Lux: you don't control the conversation, the narrative, any of it, that's the 'vibe' Lux: if you're feeling some type of way, you should go, take some responsibility for yourself Dash: You're responsible for hassling me now Lux: Then leave Lux: you control you, I control me Lux: I'm not doing what you don't want to do for some notion of being the fucking 'chill' cool one here Dash: I don't understand this, that's why I don't want to Lux: I don't think you want to Lux: it's fun and it's easy to do fucked up things Lux: and if everyone else is doing them, or not calling you out for it, why not Dash: I didn't do a fucked up thing to you Lux: I've said you did Dash: but that's not the way it was Dash: I opened up to you to, I still am Lux: You tell me about the tour and then you tell me I'm different though Lux: How do you expect me to take you at your word when what you've described there is exactly what went down Dash: I showed you around & I've showed some of them around, that doesn't mean everything else that happened was the same Lux: you said it like you thought I'd think it was funny Dash: I don't know why I did that Lux: Be honest Lux: was it just to see how cool I was and how I could hang Lux: or was it because you forgot, and thought I was one of the boys Dash: that couldn't be further from how I see you Lux: okay Lux: that's something then Dash: I meant what I said when I told you you're like a song I can't get out of my head, how I wanted to live in all those moments cos of what they felt like Dash: it's only got worse since then Dash: I didn't wanna hurt you, I don't Lux: you didn't hurt me by what you did Lux: at least, not at the time Lux: it's what you said Lux: to have to put bad intentions to those moments, you must get how shitty that is, you at least feel that too Dash: I was trying to show you this is different Lux: my head hurts Dash: Yeah 🌪 Lux: make sure you have some water Dash: that's your magic 🔮✨💖 Lux: I don't think I have any right now Dash: You haven't lost it Lux: I just need to replenish Dash: Me too Lux: I'll wish you good luck on that then Dash: Later? Lux: Yeah Dash: 🚀🪐💫

[exvangelical]

Cw: mentions/descriptions of abuse

I really can't stand when Christians are so eager to deny abuse occurs or when they do acknowledge it, they try and blame the victim. My father was about as evil as you could get. Everyday he'd beat me over the smallest of infractions and used the bible to justify it. God told him I had took the lord's name in vain? Whipped with a belt until I had welts on my thighs. Caught me reading a book on science? Slammed into a wall and punched hard enough to fracture my ribs. Didn't read the bible the way he wanted? Strangeled and screamed at until I passed out. That's barely the worst of it and yet the responses I get range from "you're a troll" to "you angered God". One bitch even called me a "christophobe" because, to quote her, "you're scared of Christians and persecuting us".

that's fucking awful. i'm so sorry that happened to you. absolutely nobody has the right to tell you that, and if they do have a loving god like they claim, he is not going to have kind words for them when they meet him.

also, if christians are persecuted for you calling out abuse within the faith, that means their entire faith is built on abuse........ so why would it be "bad" to get rid of it, in that case?