#catholic memes

[tomicscomics]

04/26/2024

It's a metaphor!

What's a meta for?

Nothin! What's a meta for you!

*wheezes for six minutes straight without taking a breath*

___

JOKE-OGRAPHY: 1. In this Bible story, Jesus describes Himself as a vine (like a grapevine), and His disciples as its branches. Branches can only bear fruit while connected to the main vine. If their connection is severed or tainted, they wither and die, and then they're pruned, suitable only for being tossed in a fire. Jesus is warning His disciples that their mission's fruitfulness depends on their continued, dedicated, healthy connection with Him and His Father. 2. In this cartoon, after hearing Jesus's metaphor, Peter declares that he and the other apostles (the "branches" in Jesus's metaphor) will "stick" with the vine. A "stick" is a long, thin piece of wood (like a branch), but "stick" can also mean "stay connected to." This is an inferior pun, because while the word "stick" has the two above meanings, only one of those meanings makes grammatical sense in Peter's comment (the latter). 3. Jesus replies that the vine (Him, in the metaphor) will be "rooting" for them. "Rooting" can either mean "laying down roots" (as in a tree growing its roots into the ground), or "cheering on" (like an audience cheering for a sports team). This is a superior pun to Peter's, because both meanings make grammatical sense in Jesus's comment. His declaration can be taken to mean either (1) that, as the vine, He'll provide the apostles with roots to nourish their fruitfulness, or (2) that, as their teacher, friend, and Lord, He'll be cheering them on and supporting them in their mission.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is another "Tomics Resurrection," where I have plucked the desiccated husk of an old cartoon from the withered branch of the past, and gorged it with so many steroids and hormones that it blasphemes nature but looks way more colorful! Also, it's been slightly reworded to flow better while maintaining the meaning of the passage; the disciples have been moved inside to the Last Supper, since this reading takes place either during or just after; and the image of the grapevine is in the second panel now, including a lush branch and a withered branch to illustrate what Jesus is saying. Tell me, how does it compare?

[catholike]

[psalmlover]

endless cycle

[mayor-of-losertown]

“Forgive them Father, they know not what they- WHAT’S THIS? IT’S KING CLOVIS AND HIS BRAVE FRANKS WITH A STEEL CHAIR!!!”

[apesoformythoughts]

via Catechesis Memes

[virtie333]

[nasranilady]

God: Okay, listen up, here are the three things that a King of Israel mustn't do:

Must not multiply horses

Must not multiply wives

Must not greatly multiply silver and gold

King Solomon:

[butterflies-and-bumble-bees]

[holyhyphae]

[indynerdgirl]

Happy Easter!

[tomicscomics]

03/31/2024

Happy Easter! He is risen! Hallelujah!

JOKE-OGRAPHY: 1. Mary Magdalene makes early trips to Jesus's tomb, maybe to anoint His Body with funeral oils, or maybe just to cry. In this cartoon, she refers to these trips as her "mourning routine." The word "mourning" (grieving) sounds like "morning" (the early part of the day). This pun implies that Mary's early daily ritual (her "morning routine") is one of sorrow (hence, "mourning routine"). 2. As Mary approaches Jesus's tomb in John's version of the story, she sees that it's open and hurries to the apostles to have them inspect it. In this cartoon, however, she's too exhausted to recognize what the open tomb implies (that the dead Jesus has somehow left His tomb). She continues into the tomb to wait for Him to return, and only after several minutes does the event literally dawn on her. This particular sunrise has seen the Son rise.

[psalmlover]

from iwishyoucouldtakemeupstate on instagram

[heresylog]

I was blocked by the original poster of this image but I still wanted to share it!

[apesoformythoughts]

via Catholic Memes

[catholic-on-main]

To all my fellow Catholics who are also giving up Tumblr for Lent, it’s been an honor.

[annabellesarchive]

top 3 pope facts

four popes are said to have died during sex- pope leo vii, pope john vii, pope john xiii and pope paul ii

the 7 month rotting corpse of pope formosus was exhumed, dressed, propped up and put on trial. a deacon was appointed to be his voice. he was found guilty

pope francis used to be a bouncer at a nightclub