#cowardice. he lives in fear and he cannot see it cannot even fathom it

[toerrishumansodontbeone]

man, its such a drag trying to find objective reviews of books with disturbing content. 9 times out of 10 it will center around the shocking subject and criticize it mainly on how justified was its usage.

Read Tender Is The Flesh yesterday and I wanted to see what more people thought, but ugh its so tiring having to filter through all the shocked normies.

I wanna hear peoples thoughts on the issues of sustainability that have been entirely left out of what is an obvious satire of late stage capitalism and the meat&dairy industry!

I wanna be validated on my nitpicky pro science sceptics pet peeves about how little enthusiasm the author has for the scientific method, how shallow the worldbuilding feels when youre faced with the premise of " all animals carry a virus deadly to humans, so they can no longer eat meat". I have a million questions having some basic interest in biology that I do. I have a million questions from being a vegetarian by simple preference. I wanna hear from other people who have trouble suspending disbelief cus INSECT PROTEIN IS RIGHT THERE AND WHAT DO YOU MEAN PEOPLE KILLED THEMSELVES BECAUSE THEY COULD NO LONGER EAT MEAT THATS INSANE

[aveaugvstus]

UNDERWATER.     /    FOR WHEN YOU GAZE LONG INTO THE ABYSS

it is the rare opportunity of a lifetime — not the kind you would expect of glorious battle and imperial conquest — but an opportunity nonethless: to go where no man has ever been. in an invention so novel and cutting-edge as to be considered perilous, the thrill of courting death and flirting with the very brink of dauntlessness is a surge of anaesthetic for the fear. there are other volunteers too invaluable to make the plunge, vladimir among them. you would not allow it even if the quartermaster had turned you away.

here, at last, there is a grim satisfaction in the knowledge that you are no different. mortality is the great leveller that cares not for dormant heroics and prestigious bloodlines. you will be useful. you will be a pioneer to the deeps.

one. advance, half a fathom’s slack. 

two. halt, the tube is kinked.

three. emergency, help, pull him up.

the diving suit is a lumbering, graceless contraption, layer upon layer of heavy grade twill and rubber but the moment you hit the water, all is forgotten. the cold permits your presence like nothing more than stray flotsam, the vast indifference of the waves sending a fragment of ocean wreckage returning to the deep. a distant awareness seeps down your spine as you are lowered inch by screeching inch of pulley and rope: this cold could kill you. a single stray movement, a too-sharp turn, could send a deluge flooding into your helmet. at which point it would not be a question of survival, or how quickly the crew stationed like sentinels at the gunwhale could haul him up against the crushing weight of the ocean, gravity and flawed human ingenuity laying their stake in you — but whether man can conquer nature, and if it was ever meant to.

you move through the descent with a muted, sunken calm, breaking the oil-slick skin of the water, and then under it, into the impenetrable depths of the sea. the quartermaster and a few handier members of the crew have rigged a lamp to the helm. if you turn you head, you can see an arm’s length or two ahead of you, but beyond that, you could stare into the maw of a beast and not know it. you would describe it akin to stygian waters, or dante’s purgatory, if you could see anything past your own hands. there is no marvelling at the deep and your pilgrimage into a land unchartered by man or god, all there is to see is endless nothingness. 

guided by the dim lantern light afixed to your suit, you turn to face the keel. the world narrows before you, framed by the circular periphery of the vision port. the cause of the incident is immediately apparent: a hunk of ice lodged between the gunmetal blades of the screw propeller. 

you hack at it with your spear, weakening the structure until it splinters, the fragments cleaving away from the mass caught between the blades. it’s over faster than the time it had taken to don the suit, run through the safety and rescue protocol, and be lowered into the water. for a moment, there’s a surge of relief that washes over you like laughter — is that it? all the pomp and circumstance for a straightforward errand solved in half the time than it took to volunteer yourself. and like the most haunting kinds of hubris, the pomegranate-sweet crush of pride comes before the fall.

you feel it on you like dead men can feel the bayonet at their back, the point pressed to spine before it sticks you through, the moment right before bullet ruptures skin. you turn, because you must, and terror does not care for the cowardice of devouring you with your back turned. if it is death, then you would face it headfirst as you have with all else in your life, survival be damned.

the vision port becomes crosshairs and you at the center. the diving suit a cage for your earlier arrogance, a waterproof coffin for a soul lost to the sea. the shadows billow and swell like black tar swallowing everything around you, your mind stretches wide and still it doesn’t quite comprehend what it is seeing till it is illuminated by your ghostly light, pale as a grave. the shape of the face you have known all your life is not one you were expecting to see down here, amidst the ice and nothingness and endless cold but you would recognise him in death, at the end of the world —

vladya  —

you reach for him, because you always will and your body reacts in a daze, the grip of soothing paralysis enveloping you like a siren luring you to obliteration before your mind can think no, no, a trick, a shade of death sent by the devil himself, or worse, whatever it is that even the devil cannot reach down here below the world, and the jerk of your hand is enough to tip the balance keeping you anchored to your lifeline. 

he, it, it reaches for you, too, but his eyes his eyes, unseeing, the life gone right out of them, severed like a throat.

you scream. 

a guttural, animal howl of raw anguish, a sound of deliverance with nothing but the depths to hear you. you claw at the ropes, three pulls, five, six — heaved out of the water like a deus ex machina snatching you at the last beat from the jaws of terror. 

you are shaking as the command gather to hear your report, the survey of your success, and you relay the news from a strangled state of detachment. you do not speak of what you saw, or who. not because you are afraid to be labelled mad or dismisssed, but because you know even in your bated silence, in time they will all come to see what you glimpsed in the ice.

it knows. you could have seen any face or murdered soul down there; it could have been anyone. a body would have been horrifying enough, you have seen men die before — it knows; it has seen into your heart and vivisected it, it has taken your fear and made a feast out of it what it found there.

you are still shaking as they release you, grasping at the taffrails for purchase with the rationalisation of the cold. 

when vladimir comes, you cannot look him in the eye. you do not know how without seeing what the sea has shown you. it has lain waste to the salvation you harboured in your heart, the assurance that just this once, this life, he would live. and if he comes to you now, with soft words and slivers of aching kindness, you think you will break. 

it has shown you the prophecy; the cycle begins anew. 

[imagine-loki]

Such a place like this

TITLE: Such a place like this

CHAPTER NO./ONE SHOT: One shot

Author: lizwritesfanfic

Original imagine: Imagine taking a rather grumpy Loki to an aquarium to show him how beautiful this earth can be. Loki pretends at first that nothing is of interest to him, but as soon as he sees the underwater creatures he cannot hide his awe and starts to ask the workers and scientists hundreds of questions, much to your amusement.

Rating: Teen

It’s a fluffy one.

‘Come on, Mary Poppins,’ you yelled from the hallway. You slammed your flat hand against a door repeatedly. It was starting to hurt as you had been at it for a while, but you ignored it. ‘You should know by now, I will not stop until you come out the door dressed and ready!’

The door was yanked open, revealing a very annoyed Loki. He was dressed up nicely in a black suit with a green shirt and a golden tie holder. His jaw was clenched and his eyes showed anger that unnerved you. You bit your lip suddenly doubting whether you really were the person that should be forcing him into all this.

Loki passed you without giving you a second glance. He pushed his hands deeply into his pockets as he made his way over to the elevator.

‘Explain to me again, brother, why my presence is needed?’ Loki sneered as he joined the others, pressing the button to close the doors. You quickly slid through the closing doors into the elevator.

Thor glared at his brother for his rude behaviour towards you, before giving you an apologetic look. You shrugged at him. Fidgeting with the hem of your sleeves you turned to face the doors. Your hair was loose, but otherwise you were dressed up formally, as were Tony, Steve, Thor and Loki.

‘There is a fundraiser at the aquarium, Rock of Ages,’ Tony mumbled putting his phone away as the elevator came to a stop.

‘I still don’t see why I must be present in the midst of some fish,’ Loki growled. He bluntly pushed you out of the way as he made his way to the limousine. You rubbed your arm where his large hand had slightly painfully gripped you.

You sighed, feeling a brick drop into your stomach. This was going to be a long night. Fortunately, you sat down opposite of Loki. At least he could not shove you out of the way during the ride. You could only imagine falling straight on your face during the ride.

‘You were always thriving during these sorts of meetings on Asgard, brother,’ Thor said laying a hand on his shoulder. ‘Those skills are what we need now.’

‘That notion makes it even more tedious,’ Loki said. He stretched his legs forward, promptly kicking your feet out of the way. You clenched your jaws.

‘Are you trying to murder me through stress induced cardiac arrest,’ you asked sarcastically through your teeth. Rage was burning in your eyes by now. Loki grinned, letting his tongue slip over his bottom lip. He let his eyes roam over the green dress you wore. You feared that might happen the moment you pulled it on, as it was one of his colours. You did regret it more as you saw the green shirt he was wearing. You matched, which implied things. However, not many colours would do well in a room illuminated by fish tanks, so the options were slim. A nagging voice in the back of your head told you just how many colours would do well, but you chose to ignore it again.

The moment you were inside, you made sure you were as far away from the God of Mischief as you could get. Chatting happily with Steve and some other guests, your night was proving to be better than expected. After an hour or so, Thor laid a hand on your shoulder. He looked troubled by something, which most probably was his brother.

‘Would you care for a dance, Lady Y/N?’ he mumbled. Steve took over your glass of wine with a smile. You made your way over to the small makeshift dancefloor to slowly move on the music of the violinist. You felt tiny in the presence of such a large man. Thor’s hand felt like he could cover the entire with of our back as he laid his hand on your waist.

‘What is wrong?’ you asked moving your lips as little as possible.

‘We lost sight of my brother,’ Thor mumbled. You snapped your eyes down to look around the room. ‘Tony is looking for him now.’

You cursed as softly as you could. Loki roaming free in an aquarium could result in all kinds of mischief that you could not even start to fathom. ‘You said he was good at this sorts of things?’

‘He is usually,’ Thor mumbled. ‘Though I believe he wished to please father. I have been blind to their troubled relationship.’

You smiled up at the worried man. ‘You cannot blame yourself for the actions of your father.’

‘Thank you, Lady Y/N’ Thor mumbled. Thor let it slide, but the guilt in him told him that he had been enjoying his own privilege too much to notice. He had been young, but the problem had been there in front of his eyes all along. He chose to ignore it, not to see it, use all the arguments he could to act like it was nothing. He chose not to stand with his brother and with it, helped him down the path he had eventually taken. You let go of him and stepped back as the music ended. Nodding slowly, you turned around. ‘Are you going to look for him as well?’

You grinned over your shoulder. ‘Looking for Loki? I would if it was not anything but wishful thinking, but you and I both know that Loki will not be found if he does not wish to.’

Thor clenched his jaws at the remark. Many encounters flashed before his eyes, before realisation settled. He clenched his eyes shut. For a Midgardian woman to explain such a thing to him… 

You grabbed a glass of wine before you sat down in the window, looking at the fish move around with such ease. It was an amazingly beautiful sight. Such peacefulness was not often found in a city like New York, especially not when surrounded by Avengers.

‘What is that?’ a silk voice came from behind you. You smiled without looking over your shoulder. Only one person had a voice that could give you goose bumps. Too bad it belonged to such an insufferable person.

Loki glanced at you from the corner of his eyes. The dimple in your cheek formed by the smile made him swallow. He had witnessed the dance between you and his brother. The impact your words had had on his brother had blown him away.

‘That,’ you started, ‘is a stingray. I am not sure what kind of stingray, though.’ You watched the creature make its way up the glass. You took a sip of your wine before turning to face him. The sight of him caused you to blink a couple of times. It was a rare sight to see Loki enthralled. His jaws had finally unclenched. Your eyes made their way over to his shoulders, which were much more relaxed now. It made him less threatening. His eyes had turned an even more vibrant green in the blue light. Looking like this, the man was absolutely beautiful.

‘I saw some fish turn two times its size just now,’ Loki mumbled pulling his hands from his pockets. He stepped next to you to stand closer to the glass.

‘Puffer fish,’ you mumbled, rendered speechless by the sight of him. ‘Very poisonous.’

Loki nodded with a frown. He laid his hand on the glass, watching numerous amounts of fish move as one only to disperse as a large fish swam past them. He smiled ever so little at the sight, before removing his hand from the glass and glancing over at you. You had softened your expression to him, which startled him at first. The entire setting and the training he had had on Asgard made sure that he did not show any of the unwelcome emotion. He noticed you stopped biting your lip, your usual nervous behaviour was all gone. He had himself to blame for your previous reactions to him, though, and he knew it well. He had taunted you, made you his target for everything, pushed you over. It was a cowardice excuse to touch you if he was honest with himself. He would rather take a trip to Helheim than admit that.

When he had first arrived, the politeness and kindness had thrown him off. To be honest he did not know how to act around people like you. He was not used to people giving him an honest chance and as he was sure he would destroy that part of you. He would make sure that the image the Avengers had of you, would be the way you looked at him very soon. Yet, it seemed like it did not work. You were nervous around him as you readied yourself for the next unpleasant experience, but the hatred Loki had been waiting for never appeared.

‘Care to dance,’ Loki said holding his hand out for you. You smiled at him, taking the hand so he could help you up.

‘Later,’ you said grabbing his hand. ‘I wish for you to meet some people.’

‘Lovely,’ Loki growled softly.

Loki’s jaws clenched, annoyance rising again. He had met enough people here to know that they all were pretending to be things they most certainly were not. He was yet to run into someone to have a proper conversation with. Thor had been right about one thing, he had been in his element here. He did not enjoy people that tried to manipulate him with every move they made, but he knew how to play those games well. 

However, he noticed his own body had betrayed him the moment you laid your hand on his elbow. He had not fully grasped it, but he was already well on his way to meet these people.

Introductions were short and Loki could not be bothered by listening to the names. It was when you squeezed his arm that he came to pay attention. You had asked a question about how the puffer fish grow.

You smiled as Loki was suddenly indulged in conversation with the professors. You had known Loki to be a frequent reader and very intelligent, but to see him speak so easily with the professors blew you away. He seemed to speak with the men and women in a language you did not understand. Sure, you were quite versed on most subjects. As you were hired to deal with Public Relations to take the load off of Pepper, you had to know something about everything.

Loki had not realized you had silently excused yourself, making your way back to the glass behind which another world lived. This time you leaned your aching back happily against the cold glass. You had been standing for too long and those heels were making you pay. Steve soon joined you, looking exhausted.

‘I informed Tony and Thor you found him,’ he mumbled. ‘Nice move there, kid.’

You grinned over the edge of the glass before taking a sip of wine, looking at Loki grin with the professors as some researchers joined the conversation. ‘Thank you, gramps. I am just glad he is in a better mood now.’

Steve raised an eyebrow at you, smirking a little. You knew what he was implying, but you refrained from making a comment on it. Better not indulge the man.

‘Are you, now?’ Tony chimed in, wiggling his eyebrows. You sighed and rolled your eyes, before biting your lip softly. Of course Tony would take the opportunity. Steve started laughing, before shaking his head slowly. The glass of wine in your hand was quickly empty.

You stretched your muscles before looking at yourself in the mirror. It was good to be home again. The night had been long, but the network had broadened once again, though you doubted anything useful would come from it. You made your way from your bathroom over to your living area and dropped on the couch. You were just about to take off your shoes, when a knock came at the door. You sighed deeply, putting your foot back on the floor and straightening your back.

‘It’s open!’ you yelled too tired to stand up and open the door.

The door creaked open, revealing the blinding light of the hallway. You had only lit a small light next to the couch. The soft lighting helped you relax. Loki stepped in and closed the door behind him.

‘I must apologize, Lady Y/N,’ he said making his way over to you.

You frowned with a little smile. ‘What for?’ Again, that voice reduced yours, add that graceful walk into the mix and you were reduced to the vocabulary of a toddler.

‘I asked you to dance, yet I was drawn into the conversations that I lost my sense of time,’ Loki said. ‘There are apparently creatures on this world that do not stop moving when sleeping.’

You laughed softly by just how taken he was by the aquarium. ‘Next time, we should go to a tropical garden with butterflies and terrariums,’ you said to him.

A playful smirk was flashed at you. ‘My, my,’ Loki said. ‘Are you asking me out on a date?’

You blushed deeply and bit you lip again. You stood up from your seat on the couch to give yourself some posture to hide the awkwardness. Loki bent down to grab your hands, placing one on his shoulder and holding one. He waved his hand before laying it on your waist. You looked around as music started playing, but the source could not be found.The beautiful sounds of a piano made you smile softly.

‘How about this Friday,’ Loki whispered in your ear as you started dancing. He was a lot closer than Thor had been, your chests almost touching. Feeling brave, you let your hand travel from his shoulder, under his arm to his back. Loki grinned as he closed the slim distance between you. ‘I’ll take you to dinner after.’

You smiled and turned a deep red. ‘I would like that.’ You laid your head on his shoulder, inhaling his scent greedily. ‘Or you could take me back to the aquarium and teach me what you have learnt.’

You could feel Loki smirk wider. ‘That,’ he mumbled,‘I shall accept as a second date.’

[cthmpsxn-blog]

[text]: i’ve got one last client, i’ll catch up with you there, okay? don’t do anything I wouldn’t do ;)                                                                           ➟ sent.

She was late; she knew she’d be late, her later sessions with clients always seemed to run longer than they were meant to and as she pulled her fingers through her hair, the foggy bathroom mirror at the gym painting her in a slightly more put together state than she expected, Caitlyn caught the time on the glowing screen of her phone and cursed her way out into the quiet street. Everyone was likely already at the event, they’d probably been there for hours and momentarily she hated that she’d chosen to work late. A typical response really, work to stay busy, to keep her mind from wandering even though she knew at any moment Maddox could walk through those same doors and shatter her weakly built persona of composure that she threw up whenever he was around. 

Her friends; a drink; a night to live, it was all she really needed to get through another night on her own. How pathetic she felt to need that; to not be okay, it felt childish and she was far from a child. Nevertheless, thinking about it was redundant, and it got her nowhere. How far someone that seemed to eternally perch themselves on a pedestal of positive energy could fall so quickly was not a line of thought that she’d wander tonight. Slipping into the drivers seat of her car, she tossed her gym back to the back where it habitually lived since she always forgot to take it out and deeply regretted it whenever she realized she’d done it again.

For a town that very rarely did you ever run into someone you didn’t know, it still felt like too long of a drive to the high school, Caitlyn switching through songs until she found something to boost her mood, grabbing for her phone to call ahead. If Remi or Lenny weren’t waiting for her at the door they’d hear about it, a thought that brought a quick smile to her face. The dial tone filled the interior of her car as the music cut out, the bluetooth kicking in after the first ring, tapping her fingers across the steering wheel, a deep frown set in place when Lenny’s phone rang out, Caitlyn only looking down for a moment at her phone to try Remi instead before a bright light on the road drew her attention. Like a flash bang, it blinded her, Cait instinctively shielding her eyes as best she could without blocking her view. It faded, slowly but surely, leaving blinding spots glimmering in her vision, the road took shape, trees that lined it no longer blurred shapes. ----- And neither the figure standing in the middle of the road. Standing there; just waiting. Too close to brake in time, she swerved left sharply, the squeal of tires drowning out the sound of Remi’s voice mail kicking in and recording the next three minutes of noise. Gravel and dirt crunched beneath tires as her car went off the road, spiralling a quick descent into the cavern of trees that lined the road and opened up into a branch of the woods lining the far side of the town. It was impossible to see -- to make sense of what lay in front of her, but the ground beneath her car falling through, drew the screaming in her throat louder while she fought for control over the steering wheel.  It was quick and sharp, the car coming to a deafening stop as it slammed into a tree, the impact rough as the front end of her car crumpled by the force of it. Airbags deployed a moment too late, Caitlyn’s vision already waning after her head smacked the window, hard.  Move. Get out and move. It didn’t make sense ---- why would someone stand in the middle of the road like that? The only real reason brought a sense of panic to her chest. People were dead. Murdered. Move. Coughing and groaning as she shifted as best she could in her seat, pushing the airbag out of the way with frustration that bordered a sense of fear, Cait only paused long enough to grab for her phone, it’d fallen to the floor on the passenger side, fingertips barely reached it before she tugged her seatbelt clean off, the sound of fallen footsteps against gravel and autumn leaves. Throwing the drivers door open, she fell out onto the ground, her head spinning violently as she fought the urge to vomit. 

Get up. Her body hadn’t given in, she was fine -- she could run. She knew this town; knew the woods and she damn sure knew she could outrun most. Sticks broke beneath her weight as she pushed herself to her feet, swaying slightly on the spot, the glow from her phone flashing low battery and Remi’s phone call. “--- Remi... Remi..” Footsteps sounded louder than before, Caitlyn only looking around briefly towards the road above before she took a few steps away from the car, her trail into the trees already in front of her

Impact was brutal. Caitlyn might have sworn she heard it perforate the air like nothing else she’d ever heard when everything went black. Her body hit the ground and rolled through the debris of glass and rocks, her phone tumbling from her hand to bury beneath the foliage, the phone call ending after three long minutes of voice mail was left for Remi Kinkade to find; the screen flashing low battery before going dark too.

She didn’t come to by choice, her lungs begged for air as the smell of something awful corrupted her airways. What she did know -- was her head hurt, and though she tried to reach for it, the feeling of dried blood cracking on her forehead bothering her enough, she couldn’t. Bound. The rope around her wrist and ankles dug into her skin so much that it hurt. Breath didn’t reach her mouth, nothing did --- every confused sound that fell from her lips muted by the material tied and shoved in her mouth, the feeling of it alone foreign and enough for her to pull against her restraints just long enough for Caitlyn to completely miss the figure drowned in the dim light above as it came to a crouched stop beside her, a finger as detestable a skeletal figure lifting her chin high enough for her to see the camera.  “I did warn all of you that my games had just begun,” a distorted voice began, garbled and animatronic as though the speaker were half-machine. “The first move was mine, the second yours. If silence and pathetic, shameful cowardice is the route each of you wishes to take, then I accept.” The hand released Caitlyn’s jawline and the camera panned back with each step its wielder took. “And so I make my next play… Caitlyn Thompson’s life hangs in the balance. Each of you must decide who will be the first to open their skeleton closet and reveal a secret hidden away from the rest. Failure to do so will result in consequences you cannot even begin to fathom, especially for sweet Caitlyn.” Panic --- more panic filtrated her bones, Caitlyn pulling against the restraints more as the voice she could never recognize but would never forget implied what might happen, a muffled sound of objection grew to a scream as she remembered the bodies; how the papers said they were found, the boy hung on the goal posts of the football field, tears leaving dirty tracks against her cheeks as they fought their way through her desperate need not to cry.

Vision blurred, and her head spun, darkness threatened to take her under. 

“The day of atonement is coming, Blackwater Bay. You have thirty minutes.”