#current thoughts

[lanaknowsitried0]

I always love more 😓

[gwyrol]

leglocking around a deskpet's head so it chokes on it while desperately trying to breathe but getting more and more muskdrunk and hazy. til it passes out. god, having its pretty lil eyes roll back as it goes limp

maybe using its throat while its completely out of it too. itd be a wasted opportunity to not use its throat like a fleshlight when it's literally limp and helpless...

[merl-merl]

It’s sexist to say that women who decide to change what they eat anytime, or rather just choose to go vegan or at least try some aspect of vegetarianism, is only for ‘health’ reasons — aka just to ‘lose weight’.

That is feeding a stereotype both of women in and vegans in general, and contributes to anti-fat sentiments in a typifying way. It also seems dismissive to women who currently suffer with eating disorders, or have gone through something similar for actual health issues.

[yeetedpotato]

[magister-avalon]

Who's your favorite dedicated, back-end damage dealer?

Me:... Ulmus

[thatvictorian]

[aquamanscumsock]

like I know I’m not much, but oh god I would’ve loved you forever.

[the-missing-sock]

Sitting on my balcony in front of a tree of pink spring blossoms, I listen to the sounds of crickets chirping in the background, dogs barking, motorbikes zooming off, and my downstairs neighbor listening to a French classical radio station. The piano’s keys drift up into the night’s warm air, interrupted by a low-flying plane distracting me from the concerto’s finale. Now my thoughts have returned to my internal silence, but wait—a new song, so beautifully played—then a car rushes past, an engine roaring to life, people talking in the outside courtyard. One, two, three; the waltz plays on. A car door opens and slams shut, and then another one; the ignition starts, the gear stick shifts into reverse.

The music. I listen to the violin and the piano marry each other in an emotional exchange of movement, sound, and energy. So beautiful. More cars. Always crickets. And a lizard on my roof. A dramatic ending to the nighttime concert. Audience applause as the lights are turned off. Wait! A dog barks; it’s an encore.

[torrentialmonsoon]

no matter how

loud the music

in my ears sings,

my thoughts remain

louder.

[acourtofquestions]

I personally love all of SJM’s books, and have read TOG and ACOTAR (I’m on the second book of CC) but I’ve seen multiple anti-SJM posts on tumblr. I personally disagree with them, but what’s your opinion?

(One of the main things they argue is that Rhysand was abusive)

A very good question! Thanks for asking! I always love talking about fandom stuff & your posts are always a fav😊🫶 @romantasyreader28 (apology in advance for the delay & long ramble lol; it was a good question I had many thoughts on🤣)

I was actually pondering something similar within this note but separate for an updated reading post on Rowan from TOG (I’m reading HoF for the first time; & though I generally try not to pick “pro/anti” (as there’s always another side to the story) not gonna lie I was near “anti”-Rowan… until PT. 2… hence the more “pro”-Rowan upcoming post😂).

— So there are definitely a LOT of changing opinions depending on the point in the series.

As far as Rhysand goes:

I was on a rollercoaster with him at first too, the introductory chapters & UTM time period were concerning (assault is a big trigger for me; so having Feyre drink faerie wine, “marking” her with paint, & kissing her without consent was disturbing).

With that said, I did find his character generally easier to “like/not loathe” on first read in comparison to other “enemies to lovers”. I think this is because of a few reasons… The 1st being you know there is more going on beneath the surface. 2nd, the perspective it’s written in shows their draw to each-other & makes swaying the audience easier. 3rd the undercurrents to their banter & little clues to more within their interactions; such as him betting on HER; shows he believes in her & also something more. Finally, it is furthered by the already very dark setting, not to give excuse but to more easily explain the why which is NOT of malice. My biggest point is that he does not defend it, apologizes for it & it is not portrayed as “okay”.

He is not perfect, he can be read as hero or villain; he does NOT make the same mistake twice, he DOES apologize, he does TRY to be better. He creates a sanctuary specifically for women to escape abuse, he makes a lot of effort to give Feyre HER choices & empower her to make them. And the times we are shown his side it is much less morally murky.

I know there is a lot of anger around him hiding the risk of Feyre & Nyx; I don’t disagree it is wrong & confusing, but we do not get the full picture, clearly showing in the other perspectives. & The other being his threat to Nesta after she tells Feyre; which was wrong & he knows it. — There is a difference however between anger & action. — While many of these patterns could probably be deemed as abusive, they could also be deemed as acceptable/explainable. Which one is correct?

— Well, at the end of the day it’s fiction. Within a genre that very much struggles with this as a whole. & While there is something to be said for “real world” power within fictional escapes. It also comes with a different & messier set of non-existent rules; if we are to examine them all, quickly everything becomes problematic. & maybe that’s good to do, maybe not; it’s worth acknowledging; but in that acknowledge that it is fiction.

Meanwhile, writers are real people. So be wary of jumping toward conclusions on either side…

As far as SJM goes:

I don’t know & we’ve never met, I don’t know what she’s like, what she believes in, what she’s experienced. I doubt anyone would write a series with the intention to sway people into abusive relationships. & though intent is a good question to ask; I tend to lean similarly towards no.

There are times I think abuse is shown; whether intentional (as Arobynn and Celaena), or questionably (Tamlin & Feyre’s first kiss; a moment that bothered me as she is drunk, but I actually appreciate because it is shown how problematic they are later; point to it as a key warning, not “romantic fairytale” to aspire for).

I also think the Maasverse does take time to give survivors & “unspoken stories” a spotlight, that means a great deal (or at least it did to me) with characters like Gwyn being a large one.

It serves as an enjoyable escape from the world; one we know is fiction. A morality that can be more “fun” to debate & ponder, but still exists within fiction & opinion primarily over actual moral grounding.

For me: I love Rhysand (though I may not wish to marry him in the real world) I wish to have someone to hold my hair when I have nightmares & I loved watching him and Feyre fall in love in moments like that; I love the way SJM turns plots on their heads & think she does a great job with them.

Reading throne of glass as my next Maasverse series has been cathartic; I have thoroughly enjoyed many dynamics and actually praised them for flipping stereotypes on their heads & NOT being abusive.

So, while I think there are many sides and points to argue & at the end of the day is generally within fiction; I enjoy SJM’s writing & reading them. I generally don’t find it more problematic than other series. And prefer to enjoy fandoms, or move along if it doesn’t feed me healthily.

[lanaknowsitried0]

I always end up alone

[freeced]

you ever reach that point in your chronic back pain where it just feels like a dick measuring contest with your nervous system

and it's being a WAY bigger dick

sometimes I'm like "damn, I guess I am getting old" and then remember crumpling to grocery store floors as a kid whenever muscle spasms wrested temporary control from my brain

last year when I started using a cane, people who'd known me for years came up to ask if I'd been hurt, because I never let it show on my face

sometimes somebody's BEEN hurt and you'd never know

so disability rights now and I won't say please

[gentle-zephyr]

He’s the Hozier to your Olivia Rodrigo

[kiwibirbkat]

How to get people to know what's wrong with me without telling them what's wrong with me

How to tell people what's wrong without getting concern in return

Voids for sale

FANG SURGERY

[magister-avalon]

Yeah, after reading this letter at [373; 322], I think Eomir might be mindcontrolled, like what Cass said would happen with the gemvine grapes if ingested.

There's no way this poor guard would miss his daughters birthday for the first time out of duty and short notice from eomir, as well as question quitting for the 21st damn time and just following blindly to this degree because of the trust he has in Eomir, unless Eomir has proven himself worthy of it... in which case, I can only assume either mind control, or he's just shitty and working with either the adamant syndicate or the graveborns (maybe both?).

Though, I also think there's a possibility that the guy is just being manipulated by someone he trusts, in which case, big oof, nobody deserves that.

[corvus-space-station]

Something's been on my mind recently cuz I've been sick.

Do whatever you need that helps you, if you have to do something differently that's fine.

If you can only do some chores while sitting down do them wile sitting.

If you need to sit down cuz you've been standing or walking for a bit and you're tired. You can and should

It doesn't matter how most people do something. What matters is what helps you do something.

I should take that advice though. I'm bad at listening to what my body needs