#definitely LOVE this and the comp is just chefs kiss

[chiscribbs]

Asking some AU comp competitors & supporters:

- Are there any AUs you weren't familiar with that have recently caught your attention, or that you would like to learn more about?

- What are some AUs/fanworks that you enjoy, and would encourage more people to go check out? (Doesn't have to be in the comp!)

Oooooooooooh my gosh, SO many!! I wasn't terribly involved in the fandom before this, mostly just stayed in my little remote corner and got whatever happened to find its way into my space. This contest has introduced me to a whole host of fascinating AUs that I'm definitely going to be checking out in the near future. Just to name a few: @noval1t's Void Brothers AU, @theemployees AU, @theserpentsnight's Red Rover AU, @phoebepheebsphibs's Until I Found You AU, @twinpathy AU, @separatedleoau (which I'd seen some content of before, but had yet to check out for myself), @donniesbrows' REBOOT: Second Chance AU, @getindumdums' AU (that I got a brief, but very memorable, glimpse of via that one comic lol), and uuuuhhh...oh gosh, so many. Just- A *lot* of really neat and interesting AUs to be had around here that I found thanks to this competition. THANKS, @tmntaucompetition!!! ❤

I've been a big fan of @vangh17a's Wanderer comic and @kathaynesart's Replica comic for awhile! I also absolutely adore @star-sparkler's fanchild Augustine Hamato and @shiveagit's Spiderverse AU is one of the coolest I've seen, the designs are just - *chef's kiss* - SO beautiful! I also have to take this chance to promote an incredible fanfic series that a friend introduced me to awhile back that I have not been able to put down and as someone who typically isn't the most avid fanfic reader, that means a lot - it's called "Mind Over Matter" by @danzinora-switch on AO3. It's SOOOOO GOOOOOD - the characterization is so on-point, the plot is so well thought-out and developed with good pacing that makes it easy to blow through several chapters in a sitting. I especially love the way the author shows whose perspective a chapter is being told from, it's easy to tell which brother is "narrating" based on the way that they think and how they see things. Mikey's has to be one of my favorite examples of this. Anyway - I won't spoil any of the plot, but I highly recommend giving it a read if you haven't already. 👌

Thanks for the ask, btw - this whole event has been such a fun and thrilling experience for me and it's nice to see people out here spreading love & appreciation for each other's works. Hope you have yourself a nice day!

[tokillamockingbird427]

Is Logan as thicc as his boyfriend/husband Keegan?

I'm fucking ranking them all on thiccness now. You've pushed me to this point.

Rorke. Rorke is easily the tallest and strongest Ghost. The muscles on this man are *chefs kiss* I mean, have you seen his biceps??? I was so jealous of Logan when Rorke got him in that headlock on the train. Shape association: Trapezoid.

Merrick. I like to think Merrick is actually a bit shorter than Hesh, which makes him one of the shorter Ghosts, but he's still very well muscled. He's got a bit more fat comp too, so his shape is rounder. (Kind of obsessed with this guy.) Shape association: Pentagon.

Keegan. Unfortunately, though a fan favorite, Keegan simply isn't as thicc as the top two. He is very shaped though. Great thighs and butt, kinda snatched waist. Shape association: Dimond.

Elias. He used to be one to contend with Rorke, then he retired and lagged behind, never really caught up. Now he has a bit of a dad bod. If he were a celebrity, tabloids would go nuts after his un-retirement: "Dad or Daddy?" Shape association: Dimond.

Hesh. This man was definitely a playboy in his early years. Got that triangle shape going on with his torso, so small waist and big shoulders. Strong and sweet. Shape association: Triangle, but the pointy bit points down.

Logan. Not known for being thicc, still very well loved. He's got a fantastic ass though. Pulled a lot of boyfriends with that. Shape association: Spade.

Kick. Lean motherfucker. One of the more lithe Ghosts. Shape association: Rectangle.

Neptune. No one knows what they look like tbh. They do not like being perceived. (Schrodingers law places them at 1 and 8. Both the best and the worst.) Shape association: Square. (Very reliable shape.)

(Less how thicc they be and just how attractive I find them lmao.)

[randomvarious]

Athamay - “Kiss the Whip” The Gothic Sounds of Nightbreed Song released in 1996. Compilation released in 1998. Goth / Darkwave

So, if I was gonna make a playlist that was called something like, "Songs From the 90s, But Not From the Early 90s, That Sound Like They're From the 80s," this and probably a bunch of other gothic/darkwave tunes would be on it. See, the 80s didn't actually die when pop music decided that it was time to move on to some other shit; deep in the subversive underground, the goths and BDSM folks actually managed to keep that synthesizer-and-drum-machine-driven content going for a looooong time past December 31, 1989. And now, the synths, they've come full circle, folks! Despite all the technological advances that we've made in music, with digital audio workstations and such, the sounds that emanate from an analog 1980s synthesizer are something that we've actually come to cherish again. And we absolutely love it!

So here's one of those 90s goth bands that sang about BDSM and who helped to keep that 80s goth sound on life support. Athamay, a British trio, who were fronted by a woman who merely goes by the letter J, only released one album in 1996, and then a mini-album promo on CDr in 2003, but they've also operated under the name Torturetekk as well, and as Torturetekk they released one album in 2000, and then returned just last year with a couple mp3 singles, too.

That 1996 Athamay album though, features a fun tune called "Kiss the Whip," which then appeared a couple years later on a comp that was put out by Cleopatra Records called The Gothic Sounds of Nightbreed.

Now, I can't say for certain that people in the 80s actually found synth-laden goth stuff to be particularly spooky, but I'm guessing that if they did, by 1996 that spookiness had definitely worn off, and those who were still digging that dark, 80s synth sound at that point just found it more endearing, nostalgic, and fun than anything else. At least that's the vibe I get from a song like this one. A sound and scene that was once considered edgy had turned passé and inoffensive, but just because the shock had evaporated doesn't mean the music wasn't still good, especially if you can't get enough of an 80s synth sound, which is a sound that I, myself, happen to love.

So, with that said, despite the fact that I don't think that I'll ever be interested in doing BDSM anytime soon, I can still dig the shit out of a song like this. One reason is that the synth work and drum track are great as they really channel a classic, definitive 80s sound. But there's something about a spoken-word, deadpan female vocal that I love, too, and I think that's grounded in the idea of someone being so arrogant as to think that they're actually above the concept of singing. I guess there's, like, a rejection of tradition in that, too, like how a lot of punk vocalists purposely try not to sing like a trained professional. But with a vocal like J's, you can actually understand what she's saying 😅 .

I may not ever want to kiss or be kissed by the whip, but this mid-90s goth tune sure whips and is *chef's kiss* 😏.

[squarecarousel]

Interview with Elizabeth Beals

Here we are at the end, our final interview! Fittingly, we're capping it off with Elizabeth Beals, the other long standing member who has stuck around since Square Carousel's very beginning. While Elizabeth's signature style has remained instantly recognizable from Challenge 1 through Challenge 143 and counting, her skills have undoubtedly blossomed over the past decade. Today, we're catching up with our resident long haul Square Carousel member, admin, and comics professional, Elizabeth Beals!

Emma Frost

Q: Even though your art style is beautifully consistent, your work still stays fresh with each new challenge. What are the biggest aesthetic changes you notice in your work when you compare your most recent pieces to your graduation portfolio?

A: I haven’t looked at my graduation portfolio in a hot minute, it’s pretty wild seeing how far I have come. I’ve gotten better at compositions/ I’ve leaned into cooler, more saturated palettes/ have a better use of textures/ and I also don’t force myself to create a full bleed illustration if it’s not completely necessary to get the story across.

Elizabeth’s workspace

Q: Has your art making process changed at all during your post college years?

 A: Oh yeah, definitely!

In college I would thumbnail/ flesh out the comp at scale with normal mechanical pencil/ ink with a 005 micron/ erase the under drawing/ scan in the piece/ clean up in Photoshop/ then color until completion. 

Whereas I now thumbnail/ scan in the one I like/ format and print it out at a larger scale (in light blue)/ go back over the print with a blue pencil to refine details/ ‘ink’ it with a extra fine mechanical pencil/ scan it back in/ clean up in photoshop/ and then color until completion. 

And if we want to do an even deeper dive we can look at the ‘Color until Completion’ portion.

In college I would create a top layer, which was always the scan/line art set to multiply, and then I would place the coloring layers beneath it. I was just getting into textures and color holds so they were pretty crude but it was nice that I was still fussing with them.

I currently use the same process as a base but I’ve also started painting on top of the line art (like, A LOT), using overlays, adjustments, effects, and more.

Glitter Hearts

Q: What's been your favorite professional project to work on?

A: Mmmmm, I think this one’s a tie for me, the first one would be my cover run on Star Trek: TNG - Terra Incognita. It was my first cover run and the writers/ editors I got to work with were a complete and total dream. They whipped up some pretty fun concepts and I really got to stretch my art muscles for it. Plus the Ice cream I designed for issue one got worked into the story, so having a cannon ice cream design is pretty dang neat. The second would be my first OGN, Virtually Yours, with writer Jeremy Holt! It’s been a project that we’ve had waiting in the wings since 2015 and got to revamp for ComiXology Originals in 2020. It was the largest project I’ve ever worked on and it was such a tough/ joyous/ and complete learning experience for me. I was glad to have an amazing team of people to work with and you should deff check it out if you haven’t already ;D
  [Link to Virtually Yours on Comixology]

Virtually Yours cover

Q: Any non-art hobbies?

A: Baking / Cooking/ Trying out new recipes! *Chef’s Kiss* Just chilling outside in general/ soaking up some sun ( as a former So. Cal girl I miss the high/ dry heat.) Binge watching trash T.V.

Q: Tea, coffee, or hot chocolate?

A: I love all three dearly but coffee wins, hands down.

Q: What's a career goal you have for the next decade?

A: Pretty broad but I would love to get to a place where I become less dependent on private/ personal commissions and focus more on Comic Covers and Pin-up work. 

She Hulk

Q: Do you have a favorite superhero? A: Short answer, no.
 However, I can provide a short list of some of my faves: Jubilee, Storm, Rogue, Spider-Man, Anya Corazon (Spider-Girl), Spider-Gwen, Mystique, and I’m gunna end it there before I just keep rambling.

Q: What's one thing you wish more people knew about you or your work?

A: One fun thing about me/ my work is that my love of drawing hair came from wanting to create Cammy White (Street Fighter) fan art. With braids as long as her’s you gotta take your time and learn to draw them right! XD

Q: While working, do you prefer to watch tv, movies, listen to music, or sit in silence? Any recommendations for background media?

A: Definitely a TV series or movie, preferably something I’ve already seen (less potential to distract me). I always end up falling back on older shows like Murder She Wrote or Midsomer Murders, basically anything with a long syndication. When I was working on Virtually Yours though I would have HBO’s Gentleman Jack on. It’s a newer series with only one season but it served as a good timer/ work schedule for me.

Star Trek TNG: Terra Incognita (issue 6)

Q: If you could choose one character from the Star Trek universe to befriend, who would it be and why? A: To avoid getting too crazy, I think I’m gunna limit myself to TNG (plus I have the most knowledge of that series) and go with Guinan. She’s wise beyond her years (if you could believe that), funny, empathetic, resourceful, and makes a mean drink! And not to break the 4th wall or anything, but it’s freakin’ Whoopi Goldberg!!! ;D

Elizabeth herself

Q: Excellent choice! Anything else you would like the readers to know?

A: Just that y’all are fantastic and we appreciate all the love and support you’ve shown us over that last 10 years! Thanks for letting us go out on a high note!

P.S. Stay safe. Stay healthy. And get vaccinated <3

You heard her folks! Thanks so much to Elizabeth for sharing her answers, and to you, dear readers, for getting to know us all at the Square Carousel Collective these past years.  Check out Elizabeth’s website, and follow her on Tumblr, Twitter and Instagram for fresh art as soon as it drops!

[ramblingclandestinethoughts]

So visiting my bf over the weekend (which included going to his archery shoot with him and then hanging out at his house after) was interesting because it...basically reaffirmed everything I’m feeling about our relationship and my identity? In both good ways and bad. It’s interesting how you can platonically love someone so much, but that still doesn’t make being in a romantic relationship with that person feel remotely okay. They’re just completely different types of love. I had a lot of fun hanging out with him and he’s one of the few people I can feel truly comfortable around, and I’m going to miss that so much. Tbh in a weird way I think I kind of forget I’m dating him sometimes? I mean not that I actually forget, but like subconsciously? Since we still don’t kiss or have sex or anything, it can be easy to feel like we’re just buds or whatever - and I’m just so disconnected from the fact that I’m supposed to be into him romantically. And there are times where I think I’d be okay with kissing him (not like it, probably, but be okay with it, and sometimes I kind of want to bc I’m curious what it would feel like) and then I think maybe that means I’m attracted to him or that I should at least keep trying to make this work. Which brings me to my next thing, which was when I had my attraction to women (and non-attraction to men) reaffirmed. 

So there was this guy in the group my bf was shooting with who was really fit, had great muscles (and was wearing a tank top that showed them off), and had a nice face too - just overall a pretty hot dude. So I’m kinda admiring the muscles and such throughout the time we were there, and I get a little worried bc whenever I’m able to acknowledge a man as attractive I begin to doubt my gayness (thanks, comp het). So I imagine actually touching said muscles, or kissing the guy, and...none of that is remotely appealing. In fact, there are two girls with the group that are fairly conventionally attractive but I’m not particularly attracted to (for no real reason, just didn’t happen to be drawn to them) and even though I don’t even feel very attracted to them, the idea of kissing them is still more appealing than kissing this super hot guy. And then, of course, now that I’m no longer worried about being attracted to the guy I switch to being worried about NOT being attracted to the girls (”bc if you’re not attracted to every single woman in the world you obviously can’t be gay” -my brain). BUT THEN, after we’re done shooting and back in the registration area where people are just hanging out, I see a girl I’m actually attracted to. She was wearing a tank top and short shorts, and I’m basically just (discreetly) admiring everything about her. At one point she got on a bike and rode it back to the parking lot, and her legs in motion were just... *chef’s kiss* 

Anyway, all that to say...I looked at this girl, and looked at my boyfriend, and was reminded of what attraction is supposed to feel like. And was also reminded of how sad it’s going to be if we can’t be friends anymore after we break up. So yeah, for better or worse, this trip definitely reinforced everything I’ve been feeling. 

[dvp95]

throw your head back laughing

pairing: chris kendall/pj liguori rating: teen & up tags: outsider pov, au, established relationship, idiots in love word count: 1657 summary: Cara has to wonder how much of it is performative. Of course she does; everything she knows about this game points to them being in a Scene of some sort. They seem to genuinely enjoy each other's company, if nothing else.

written for the LOVELY @jestbee <3 happy goddamn birthday jane!!!!!! you’ve been such a good pal to me and i hope i can make you smile with this stupid thing!!!!!

read on ao3 or here!

"Hello, welcome to -" Cara cuts herself off in the middle of her spiel when she looks up from the podium. Two men stand in front of her for probably the ninth time this year, matching grins on their faces as they watch the recognition wash over her. She smiles, closer to a real one than a customer service one, and gestures behind her. "Your table is available. Do you need me to escort you?"

"Thanks, love," one of them says with a wink, "but I think we can manage."

He takes his companion by the sleeve and makes a beeline for a table near the middle of the restaurant, the same one they always go for. Cara bites back a laugh as she makes eye contact with one of the waitstaff.

Nate makes a big show of sighing and turning back around to tell the kitchen at large about their arrivals. She can't hear it from here, but Cara knows that people who have been here long enough are either thrilled or frustrated, and the new hires are probably just confused. When Nate is looking at her again, Cara taps her glasses and holds up three fingers. He makes a note on his order pad. She wonders how big the betting pool is going to be this time.

The men are, as always, ensconced in their own little world the moment their asses hit the seats. Their long legs overlap under the table in a comfortable, familiar sort of way, and they talk to each other with such dramatic hand gestures that Cara wishes she could hear the topic that's got them so riled up.

Sometimes she makes excuses to walk by their table and eavesdrop. So far she's learned that they're passionate about science fiction, craft supplies, what specific colour the ceiling is painted, and gender expression. It doesn't seem to matter if they're talking about the sliding scale of acceptable femininity for men to show in public or how easy it would be to build a robot out of cardboard - they have the same amount of enthusiasm, every time.

Cara has to wonder how much of it is performative. Of course she does; everything she knows about this game points to them being in a Scene of some sort. They seem to genuinely enjoy each other's company, if nothing else.

It's always a strange atmosphere for the first half hour or so after they've been seated. They talk and they eat and they seem oblivious to the wary eyes of the staff around them, even though anyone with half a brain knows they're fully aware of the attention on them. The only time they left without anything happening was when the place was practically empty and there was no audience of unsuspecting patrons for their nonsense.

That had been a different sort of anticipation. Like the whole building had been waiting for a beat that never dropped. The men had left without fanfare, and every employee had gone home perplexed.

The general consensus, up to that point, had been that they did this for the free food and champagne, but their need for some kind of audience opened up a Pandora's box of possible motivations. Nate's convinced that they're doing some sort of social experiment, one of the line chefs thinks they must be YouTubers or something, and a very optimistic new waitress has been positing that maybe it's genuine every time.

"Maybe one of them has short term memory problems," she'd explained to Cara. "Or they're very on-again off-again."

Cara had nodded along at the time, but she's not buying it. It's the grins on their faces every time they meet her at the hostess podium that convince her they know exactly what they're up to.

As far as Cara can tell, they might just do it for the hell of it.

Forty-something minutes after the men are seated, the signs start to show themselves. Cara drifts over to Nate and nudges him, interrupting his bussing for something much more entertaining. He grins and turns around. Neither of them make an effort to hide that they're staring, because it's happened seven or so times before.

The man in glasses is twitching like he's nervous, all of a sudden, and keeps patting at the same spot in his jacket. Cara might find it sweet if she hadn't seen it so many times.

"Ha," she whispers. "Told you it was him this time."

"They don't have a pattern," Nate argues. He's always a little prickly when he loses.

"But only one of them is wearing a jacket," Cara points out. "So obviously, it was going to be him. Is it a 50/50 split again?"

Nate sighs and shakes his head, pulling out his notepad as the men start talking in low voices across the small table. "No, most people guessed the other guy. You're only splitting the win with two of the cooks."

"Nice."

It seems like Nate wants to whinge some more, but then the man in glasses is standing up. The waitstaff all pause in what they're doing and turn to look, prompting the other diners to look as well. With hilariously awkward movements for how practised Cara knows the motion is, he drops to one knee and takes his companion's hand in both of his own. Some of the diners gasp or whisper amongst themselves; the waitstaff mostly just seem annoyed to lose the pool.

"Christopher," the man starts. His voice trembles the perfect amount, and Cara is reluctantly impressed by how sincere they make this seem every time.

"Oh my god," Christopher stage whispers. Cara wonders if that's actually his name.

"We've been friends for so long," the man continues, "and I've been so deeply in love with you for most of those years - I couldn't believe it when you first agreed to see a film with me in a non-platonic sort of way."

Out of the corner of his mouth, Nate murmurs, "What the hell is that accent? I can't place it for the life of me."

"Not sure," says Cara. "He just sort of sounds like he's on telly, doesn't he? Like a presenter?"

"D'you think there are hidden cameras?"

"Surely we'd have seen it somewhere if there were."

"But why else -"

"Shh," says Cara.

They're all so familiar with this song and dance that she knows Christopher is going to fan at his face with his free hand and then start tearing up. Watching him cry on demand is her favourite part. They can argue about motivations once they've left.

Sure enough, Christopher is wiping at his eyes and grinning down at his partner in crime. "Are you serious? Of course I'll marry you."

The other diners applaud politely when the men embrace. Cara makes a mental note of those who aren't, those who roll their eyes and mutter things to their companions, those who look upset when Christopher tugs the other man into a short, sweet kiss. She's not sure if it's a perk or a curse to know which of their regulars hate her, but it's certainly useful to know who to sit by the loo.

"Better bring them their celebratory fucking champagne," Nate sighs.

"Every goddamn time," Cara says, unable to hide the fondness in her voice. She can't help but root for these idiots. "Don't forget to comp their food."

"That's not even why they do this," says Nate. He's whinging, but Cara knows it's not actually a bother to him.

Nate's right; the free food and champagne clearly isn't the reason they've proposed to each other a half dozen times in the middle of their restaurant, but it's probably a bonus. Just like weeding out the homophobes on the staff is a bonus.

When everyone goes back to their dinners and their jobs and the newly-engaged-again men are back in their seats, Cara approaches them.

"Congratulations," she says, tucking her hair behind her ear. She sees the way Christopher's eyes linger on her interlocked Venus tattoo. He holds tighter to his fiancé's hand and gives her the same shit-eating grin as whenever they ask her for a table.

"Thanks, love."

"I'm Cara," she says, tapping at her name tag. "Just so you know how to address the invitation."

The man in glasses laughs, loud. He still seems like he's performing in some way, but a look passes between them and makes his voice softer, less put-on. "I promise that we would," he says, "except that we got married eight years ago."

Cara bites back a cackle of her own and shakes her head, trying not to make eye contact with any of her curious coworkers. She's definitely keeping this one to herself - you never know when another opportunity to win a betting pool will present itself, after all - so she doesn't exactly want to draw attention to the conversation.

"Alright," she says. "I better go back to work."

"Don't you want to know why we do this?" the man in glasses asks, sounding a bit put out.

Cara shrugs. "For the hell of it, right?"

Another look passes between them, and Christopher tips an invisible hat to her. "Pretty and smart, eh? Do you accept tips?"

Technically, no. And while she thinks she probably deserves one for this, Cara knows she's got a good chunk of everyone else's tip money tonight.

"Do you?" she asks instead. "Because I've got a tip for ya. You should try saying no next time."

"Saying no?" Christopher echoes, grinning across the table.

"We haven't tried that," his husband agrees. "Not as much fun, maybe, but surely the sympathy from it will make up for that."

"Plus, I can cry more."

Cara snorts and heads back to her podium. As curious as she is, she thinks it'll be more fun to wait and see how it pans out the next time they wander in to shake things up.

[survivorreelsmagicwithin]

Episode 3- “Y'all wanted magic within and we delivered- case closed”-Autumn

Another super fun challenge! I want to shout out to the hosts for just doing a great job so far. This is making this quarantine just a little less terrible. So happy we have immunity and getting our first reward is so exciting! I’ve been trying my best to connect with members outside of my tribe in the great hall chat and get close with my tribe mates. For the most part I really trust all of them. And that’s horribly scary. I really love being on hufflepuff. But I have a feeling a swap is gonna happen. Kevin told me he thinks it’s going to be 2 tribes of 8. We will see. GL to slytherin and ravenclaw! 

HOES MAD 

https://giphy.com/gifs/lifeminute-birthday-rihanna-3fihINg62RNynS9cbY 

I'm so dead and drained rn but I look forward to reading this round and seeing how heated people are over this. And this will definitely follow me the entire game but you know what I'm glad. Don't let the 16 month hiatus fool you: when I show up I show out. Everything is mind over matter in a way and y'all caught me on a good day so I was just like fuck it I'll do this all day if I have to. So I walked into that challenge at 11:30 am and deadass my phone never left my side... for 9 1/2 hours. Also y'all know I'm at my best when I'm an underdog? So of course I went all out, please tell me you didn't expect anything less. And can I just say Gryffindor legitimately and collectively earned that because everyone participated and put points up. So yes I am that girl but I do it for the squad because I know they'll do it for me. BIG ups though to Vi and Jess- I don't care what their alliances were before today they better have each other's backs and I'll riot if they don't both survive. Literally do the right thing and send a man home. And the same goes for Ravenclaw! I wanna know what's going on over there and I'm not picky but send a man or inactive home if you can. Let it be known that I literally came into this game to raise hell for Dan and Owen lmaaaaooo. I mean I don't want them to go (yet) because that's not what good frenemies do and where's the fun in that. We make each other's arcs better and if we're cast, there will be a fight to the death sooner or later. But until then! Yes I am absolutely living for them sweating it out for a full round. Can y'all believe it? They finally lost at something God is so good. Would've loved to make Hufflepuff sweat too but hey. There's always next round

https://thumbs.gfycat.com/UnsungOblongBlesbok-max-1mb.gif

14 minutes later

Also I just wanna say that 6:00 hour was chef's kiss. In my entire org career, I have never been on a tribe that pulled off a shutout like that and that was ICONIC. Hoes mad but did your entire tribe come together and get a streak of points nonstop for upwards of an hour?? No ma'am you did not. I kept us alive all day but that hour was THE hour that took Gryffindor from 4th to 2nd and that's how you win immunity. Y'all wanted magic within and we delivered- case closed

I don't trust Nick at all. I know in the back of his mind he's thinking i'm gonna play like our previous game which I wasn't exactly loyal to him because I was loyal to some bitch ass alliance that ended up... ANYWAYS. So he seems like the type of player to keep that into consideration because he happened recently and he's sort of a newer player. So I have to be mindful of this all and as much as i'm STRESSING the fact that obviously there were external factors in that game.. that won't impact this game kind of a deal. I know this all could just be my paranoid little brain and thinking that he's out to get me when he's not.. but I haven't played any back to back games in FOREVER and when something THAT FRESH happens.. it's hard for me to not have the after thought of: Wow Nick must think i'm an loyal person who won't tell him my real thoughts. 

 But Nick gonna be a scary player down the line. He's already in my pm's bragging about how him, Landen, and I think his name is Matt? idk one of the "Weebz" (still don't know what that means) and how he will have those potential relationships moving forward.. I just... don't.... understand..... him. ANYWAYS

 The thing is... I think? I can trust Jacob fully. I think this vote SHOULD BE EASY.. but I can't help but feel really fucking bad. Like terrible. Like extremely heart broken about voting out VI. She's put her all into everything and honestly I would be so mad if i've given my all and these two dweebz didn't even show up to the comp. I know she's gonna be upset and I hate knowing that. So i'm TRYING to take emotions out of this decision and make this all strategical and within the game environment because if I was voting with my HEART i'd keep her. BUT then I have that voice in the back of my head that is saying "But if you save Vi.... she'll be loyal to you!" BUT ALSO... I know from HOSTING VI... is that Vi is only loyal to... the fun she has. If she gets bored she fucks around. She's a crackhead. But I obviously can't VOICE THIS TO ANYONE because they could flip this and reverse this on ME. 

I'm scared that if I cast any form of doubt about the vote to Jacob he will relay the message to Nick and well I become more threatening than Vi at this point because I pointed the gun at him... SO I was fucking around with the idea of... using my idol on myself, causing a 2 to 2 tie.. and well.. unless Jacob wants to go to rocks by himself... and basically get voted out.. Mr. Nick goes. But it's LITERALLY FINAL 18............ If this was final 11, sure i'd do this in a heart beat... but this is such a bad bitch move i'm scared people will see I got something on my resumé already. They'll see I went against an alliance for VI. It's just so risky.. but I told myself i'd have FUN in this game.. I just don't want to make a move purely on a past game or purely on emotion. I want to be making moves that move me forward in the game..

I LOVE JOANNA!!! THIS IS A JOANNA APPRECIATION POST!!!!!! and dan has the idol. 

Unsurprisingly, we lost the challenge. I worked my lil booty off as best as I could (I did give up but that is beside the point at this current moment) and I have been friendly, fricking nice as all hell, and then Miguel wants to vote me out. And honey... I think that sealed your fate. I am working on being a little more ruthless I guess because I really want to win this game, so if you come for me, you bet I'm coming for you. I've always made jury and I don't think that this is the season I'm getting stuck with pre-jury. Miguel is the only relationship I don't feel confident in so... bye sis. 

The immunity challenge was a hard-fought battle, but we managed to pull out a win near the end. It was the most stressful time of my life. Honestly, I felt that if we lost then I would get voted out next. Thankfully, that did not happen. However, this is a huge wake up call for me to get my ass into gear and start being more social with my tribe. Otherwise, I might find myself in the bottom and that is not a position I want to be in.

AHHHH so my tribe won immunity and reward and things are great!  Someone mentioned yesterday (Kevin?? Maybe) that this means we are the last tribe to have to see tribal council and that is a GREAT THING!  I really wonder who is going to go home- I just hope it isn't Owen.  I also really hope he still wants to work with me if we end up on a tribe together. In other news, I'm curious to see if a swap is about to happen.  With a double tribal happening tonight it seems as though it would be a big maybe! Also I'm still irritated that my glee shirt didn't count as a band tee, when everyone asks what kind of music I like the first thing I always say is 'anything by the cast of glee' xD I don't feel like I was much help in the challenge but I was there and got points for wine and sequins if that means anything. 

doing this ON TIME.. anyways chile. WOO WE DID IT! finally not coming in last hehe. god the amount of i was just frantically running around my house.. well thank god my family didn’t question it for the most part hehe. overall this challenge was super duper fun and i’m HOPING we can continue to win some because the stress of my tribe wanting to go against me.. yea it’s there. hopefully my paranoia is just that and i have nothing to worry abt ✨

Hey all you cool cats and kittens! It’s Dan, not Carole Baskin, but with the same crackhead energy. So Miss Miguel should be leaving tonight! It’s not anything personal at all. He’s a really sweet guy, but he’s just not around. I work mad hours a week and still make time for this stuff. Joanna is worried because she knows her name is going around so as long as she doesn’t try to pull something, everything is good. I think the chances of that happening are slim to none honestly. I feel like had I been able to compete in the comp I could have helped way more than others. I have a ton of random shit in my apartment that was asked for!!! I was a little shady toward Jacob in the Great Hall chat so lettuce pray that he doesn’t act like a petty fool if we swap together. I am kinda anticipating a swap after this tribal but we’ll see!!! 

we won immunity and nothing has changed on my tribe for me since my last confessional woo consistency yay c:

im sad. we have to vote out vi which is so sad. i love her shes so sweet but i have suhc a tight bond with jess and nick that like there isnt another option. but ugh someone hold my hand

Darn, we were so close to winning, yet so far. Always remember, the unintentional matsing is just as mighty as the intentional, so 3 of us making swap or merge is much more advantageous than a unit of 4. I love my tribe, I do, and I genuinely feel I may be in danger! I trust Jess and Jacob though (JJJ: Jess, Jacob, Jay), so I’m hoping for another unanimous decision. (I will probably be asleep at tribal since I have 1 hour of sleep today)

So out tribe basically gave everything they could in a 12 hour challenge of Hell. I tried especially hard thinking I would be voted out if we lost because no one really talks "game" with me. I know that side seasons are 'Survivor Lite' but typically people at least talk game. I know I wasnt the target from last vote because everyone assured me they want to work with me and Josh said to vote him out in the tribe chat. Apparently though Josh wanted to do a blindside and reached out to Autumn to let her know asking me if he had asked me. So honestly Autumn is the truest! The other two notnvoting me inlobe seeing but if Josh talked to them then... hm Anyway I cant play a perfect game anymore :( Also I have officially dug through all of Hagrids things and he has no idol for me. I thought he might have something in could take and use somewhere else since he is a keeper of keys. But naw.

Guess who lost by two points!! Fricking Nicholas and Jacob leaving us for 7 hours. Then nick only showed up for the last 3ish but he didn’t even submit anything. Wth? We’re gonna try to kick him out.

i love my tribe so much we keep having more and more fun each time :D i definitely think after max's april fools prank i'm even more inclined to want to vote him if we lose, but i'm also grateful he's not really gone because mayhaps a weeb alliance in the future is possible.... !!! i also always utilize the great hall segments to make myself known and thought about even if people also think i'm a bit annoying, idc, the main thing is they remember me and when we meet on a swap or something i am one of the first they choose to talk to! it is always an important strategy of mine, people don't realize that in big games, one of the most crucial things you can do is leave a big first impression on people on the other tribes, you have the lucky opportunity to get some spaces where you meet them in ORGs unlike in the real world - USE it to let them form an idea of you in their head and decide they like you before they even meet you, it's a weird phenomena but i've found it's one of my most consistent strategies, when i actually decide to employ it (flashback to me being so lazy in 2020 i barely even used one world.. eep) hufflepuff is cute and we WILL be continuing to make marshmallow moves, until i get to make my own independent marshmallow moves to win

Soooo we finally lost a challenge kfjahsdj time to put this alliance to the test! The answer seemed pretty clear to me though - everyone kinda just wants to do Miguel. I feel bad, because I do think these competitions have NOT played to his strengths at all and I know he can be a great competitor. And I really wanted to get to know him again this time around. For a second, Dan and I considered saving him as a loyal number... but I just can't do that to Joanna, who has rlly busted her ass lately. So tonight it's a harder choice than it seems, but ultimately, I'm going with Miguel, and I told him that. I really wish he would've put more effort into our conversations before he was in trouble lmao. Also, DAN FOUND THE IDOL HEHEHEEH so that's great :) Glad to know he trusted me enough to tell me about it! I think he's probably going to be pretty loyal this time to me? And I feel like I have to give that same courtesy back to him. Someone will probably take one of us out eventually. I rlllly do not want to stress. If for some reason they blindside me tonight or Miguel has another idol or something, it has been fun <3

[bookwyrmling]

100 Questions

Tagged by @zombizombi (ty dearie) a while back.

below a cut for length!

1. Coffee or tea? Tea, but never black. 2. Black and white or color? I appreciate all forms of light. 3. Drawings or paintings? That I make? Drawings (not well anymore, please don’t ask). Too look at? Why not both? 4. Dresses or skirts? Dresses. I’m lazy. 5. Books or movies? Books. Definitely books. 6. Pepsi or Coke? Coke...with rum and a slice of lime. No, seriously, I can’t drink soda without alcohol to cut the carbonation down. 7. Chinese or Italian? I’m guessing this is about food? Italian tends to be my ‘easy’ go-to but Chinese just tastes so good. If it’s the language, I don’t know either but may be able to use Spanish to piecemeal meaning out of Italian. 8. Early bird or night owl? Is there a bird for people who just like to sleep all the time? (for real, tho, a night owl trying to be an early bird) 9. Chocolate or vanilla? VANILLA. I’d rather not die. 10. Introvert or extrovert? I’m such an introvert it’s painful. 11. Hugs or kisses? Ask first; depends on the mood. Hugs more acceptable than kisses. 12. Hunting or fishing? I was actually off fishing when I was originally tagged in this! I haven’t hunted before, but I’d be up for learning. 13. Winter or summer? WINTER. *is a hot gay* 14. Spring or fall? Fall is gorgeous and cool and wet and comes right after the horror of summer heat and I love it. 15. Rural or urban? Urban. If I don’t live in the middle of things, I become a hermit. When I live in the middle of things I’m only mostly a hermit. 16. PC or Mac? My first comp was a mac and I learned on macs, but then switched to PC when their price point started dropping and I have no clue how to work a mac anymore. 17. Tan or pale? I am so stupidly white *cries* 18. Cake or pie? Cake, but only if it’s buttercream frosting. None of that whipped crap. 19. Ice cream or yogurt? Ice cream <3 20. Ketchup or mustard? Mustard 21. Sweet pickles or dill pickles? Dill is the only type of pickle that exists. 22. Comedy or mystery? Mystery. 23. Boots or sandals? Sandals, tho barefoot is even better. 24. Silver or gold? Silver. Yellow gold looks a little odd with my skin tone. 25. Pop or Rock? I’ll listen to just about anything *shrugs* 26. Dancing or singing? Both. I was a show choir nerd. 27. Checkers or chess? Checkers. Chess is way too intense. 28. Board games or video games? Board games. 29. Wine or beer? Both have their times. 30. Freckles or dimples? I have both. Which do I prefer? *shrugs* People’s faces look nice with or without either. 31. Honey mustard or BBQ sauce? BBQ sauce 32. Body weight exercises or lifting weights? I don’t have weights. 33. Baseball or basketball? Neither? Baseball is way too slow and basketball just never caught my interest. 34. Crossword puzzles or sudokus? Sudoku. I like numbers. 35. Facial hair or clean shaven? No preference? It doesn’t matter to me. 36. Crushed ice or cubed ice? Crushed 37. Skiing or snowboarding? Sledding 38. Smile or game face? Smile 39. Bracelet or necklace? Necklace 40. Fruit or vegetables? Fruits 41. Sausage or bacon? Turkey bacon 42. Scrambled or fried? Scrambled, unless there’s hashbrowns to mix it with, then fried over-medium 43. Dark chocolate or white chocolate? Chocolate allergy. 44. Tattoos or piercings? Considering a tattoo; piercings all closed up. 45. Antique or brand new? *shrugs* both? 46. Dress up or dress down? Down. Have I mentioned I’m lazy? 47. Cowboys or aliens? How about cowboy aliens? 48. Cats or dogs? Cats. 49. Pancakes or waffles? Waffles. 50. Bond or Bourne? Neither ever really caught my interest. I’d love to see Idris Elba as Bond, tho 51. Sci-Fi or fantasy? Yes. 52. Numbers or letters? Numbers. 53. Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings? They’re both pretty okay. I don’t have much attachment to either. 54. Fair or theme park? Theme park 55. Money or fame? Money makes the world go round the world go round the world go round~ 56. Washing dishes or doing laundry? Dishes. You can technically actually finish dishes. 57. Snakes or sharks? BOTH. 58. Orange juice or apple juice? orange juice frozen <3 59. Sunrise or sunset? Sunrise 60. Slacker or over-achiever? Over-achiever with executive function problems 61. Pen or pencil? Pencil 62. Peanut butter or jelly? Peanut butter 63. Grammys or Oscars? Neither 64. Detailed or abstract? Detailed. Highly detailed. 65. Multiple choice questions or essay questions? multiple choice 66. Adventurous or cautious? cautious adventurer (i’m stealing your answer for this one, zombi) 67. Saver or spender? Saver 68. Glasses or contacts? Glasses 69. Laptop or desktop? Laptop 70. Classic or modern? Classic 71. Personal chef or personal fitness trainer? If I could afford? Fitness trainer. I honestly don’t know where to start. 72. Internet or cell phone? Internet 73. Call or text? Text 74. Curly hair or straight hair? If I braid it and let it dry, it’s curly. If I brush it out while it air dries, it’s straight. This stays until the next time it gets wet no matter what you do. 75. Shower in the morning or shower in the evening? Morning 76. Spicy or mild? Spicy 77. Marvel or DC? Dark Horse 78. Paying a mortgage or paying rent? Rent 79. Sky dive or bungee jump? My feet stay connected to something at all times, tyvm 80. Oreos or Chips Ahoy? Golden Oreos 81. Jello or pudding? Jello 82. Truth or dare? Truth 83. Roller coaster or Ferris wheel? Roller coaster 84. Leather or denim? Denim 85. Stripes or solids? Solids 86. Bagels or muffins? Bagels. Real bagels. 87. Whole wheat or white? I make my own sourdough. 88. Beads or pearls? Pearls 89. Hardwood or carpet? Hardwood. Carpet is disgusting. 90. Bright colors or neutral tones? Neutrals 91. Be older than you are or younger than you are? My age is fine as it is. 92. Raisins or nuts? Nuts 93. Picnic or nice restaurant? Picnic lunch, nice restaurant dinner. 94. Black leather or brown leather? Both. 95. Long hair or short hair? Long. 96. “Ready, aim, fire” or “Ready, fire, aim”? Why would you fire before you’ve aimed? Is this a reference to something? If it is, I don’t get it. 97. Fiction or non-fiction? Fiction 98. Smoking or non-smoking? Non-Smoking 99. Think before you talk or talk before you think? Think first. Always. 100. Asking questions or answering questions? Conversations tend to be best when all parties do an equal amount of both.

tagging: @whiskeytangofrogman, @embyrr922, @solosorca, @voxofthevoid, @moonliel

[mooosicaldreamz]

but for a prompt....I would love a ficlet set in the "mix the bourgeoisie and the rebel" verse, maybe a few months/years after the end of the fic?

this is a good faith gesture that i do see your prompts and that i will write them, slowly but surely, over the course of the next few days. SO SEND ME ONE???? IN CELEBRATION OF ME REACHING 1K FOLLOWERS? ps if you’ve never seen the chandelier at the omnia club in vegas, you might want to find a video of it to understand this.

It’s not Beca’s idea. It never really is Beca’s idea, she’s pretty certain - one morning, she’s waking up with Chloe in her face talking a mile a minute about going on a trip to celebrate Emily’s album release, blah blah blah - Chloe’s not wearing a shirt and that’s a separate, exciting thing and so Beca nods along with what her girlfriend is saying in an attempt to move it along to the kissing. She doesn’t realize what she’s agreed to until almost two full days later, when Emily sends a picture of a little black dress and asks if it’s an appropriate length for a girls’ trip to Vegas, and Jessica is texting to ask if Omnia can have a set list so they can start programming the chandelier.

It’s a massive chandelier. She and Chloe get to Vegas first, on Chloe’s insistence - something about ambience and alone time, which Beca had read to mean more making out uninterrupted - and when they do, they get picked up by a private driver from Caesars, who does his very best not to stare at Chloe the whole time. There’s a VIP entrance and a way-too-expensive suite that’s been comped to her for performing, and yes, for sure, Chloe had definitely wanted to make out a lot.

Eventually, they make it out of their room and are shown the cavernous club, lights on and freezing. When the sound technicians start playing the setlist Beca had provided, and the chandelier starts glowing and moving, Chloe actually screams, nearly tearing Beca’s arm off she’s clutching it so hard.

“I need one of those,” Chloe says, and promptly begins taking a mass of pictures to send to Aubrey.

The next morning, Emily, Stacie, Aubrey, Jessica, and Ashley arrive, and Chloe spends all of lunch trying to explain to Aubrey about how the chandelier is a must-have for the next tour, that if she doesn’t have it or something like it, she’ll just die.

“Your girlfriend is insane,” Jessica mutters to Beca, as though she isn’t smiling at the admittedly over-the-top display of excitement as well. Emily hums in agreement, reaching for one of the weird oyster things someone had brought over as compliments of the chef. She throws it back and nearly spits it right into her champagne glass. Ashley pats her on the back as she chokes it down, chugging the bubbles to wash it out of her mouth. Beca resolves to not touch the oysters.

“Your girlfriend is insane,” Beca returns, grinning when Jessica rolls her eyes. “How much did Jesse complain about not getting to come when he drove you guys to the airport?”

“He complained the entire time,” Stacie offers. “Aubrey almost punched him.”

“I think it was definitely a punch,” Jessica says. “Legally, I think she’s dead to rights. He started crying.”

Stacie makes a mysterious humming noise, smiling and drinking her champagne, then reaching out for the oysters and not even puking. Emily sulks a little bit, and is only brightened when a waiter arrives with a new glass of champagne for her.

“Okay, so what’s the plan?” Emily asks, clapping excitedly. “You’re playing tomorrow night, right?”

“Have you seen the chandelier, Em?” Chloe asks, leaning halfway over the table to offer out her phone. Aubrey very gently reaches out to lower her hand and lower Chloe into her seat. “Right. I’ll show you later.”

“They comped us tickets to the Cirque du Solelil shows,” Jessica says, pulling out an itinerary at the same time Aubrey does. God, they are the worst together now that they’re friends. Beca should have never resolved to repair that relationship.

“And we’ve roped off time in the day to go gamble safely,” Aubrey continues. Chloe is pouting at Beca like it’s her fault that Chloe had been so consumed by the chandelier that they had been separated. Beca nearly jumps out of her skin when she feels the heeled toe of Chloe’s foot brush against her shin.

“Fat Amy is coming tomorrow, before the show,” Jessica says. Emily looks at Beca nervously. The last time Emily and alcohol and Amy had met, Emily hadn’t crawled out of bed for three days. Beca shrugs, distracted by the look on Chloe’s face as she drags her foot up and down Beca’s calf. “And then we’re going to probably get smashed and go to more clubs.”

“I would really like to go to this thing called TopGolf,” Ashely offers.

“Gay,” Chloe nods, like she doesn’t have her foot halfway into Beca’s chair. “I like it.”

“I have a meeting with Calvin tomorrow morning about my record progress,” Beca says. Chloe grins at her. “So we can’t get too smashed tonight, okay?”

“Speak for yourself,” Jessica mutters, passing out copies of their apparent itinerary. Beca frowns when she realizes its planned nearly to the minute.

“You’re supposed to go with me,” she says back, shoving at Jessica’s arm.

Jessica frowns.

-

“What the fuck?!” Jessica screams, raising her golf club up over her head and aiming to swing it down on the machine that’s tracking her scoring. Ashley manages to tackle her before she does it, grabbing her and wresting the club from her grip with some calming, nice, drunken words that turn way too quickly into kissing for Beca’s taste. Admittedly, Chloe is draped in her lap, singing along to the song playing over their sound system and tapping against Beca’s thigh to the beat. She probably shouldn’t be complaining, but she one hundred percent does, yelling at them to stop making out.

“Fuck you, Mitchell,” Ashley volleys back, and Beca flips her off, and Jessica looks like she might start crying.

Stacie, who has done more shots than any of the rest of them, gets off the couch as though sobriety was her middle name, reaching for her golf club and looking out over the field of holes. She swings - and she fucking nails a perfect shot, the ball rolling into the far hole with the kind of precision that Beca could dream of. God, how had Ashley managed to catch that?

“That’s my wife,” Aubrey yells, standing up victoriously and raising her arms as though Stacie’s massive TopGolf score is a life-changing accomplishment. Beca flips her off, too.

“Em, it’s you,” Beca says, reaching over to knock her hand at Emily’s knee. She’s been drunkenly stirring her drink for the last ten minutes, and it sloshes a little onto Beca and Chloe when she gets up.

She swings so hard that she throws her club onto the grass.

-

“I have a meeting in forty minutes,” Beca whispers, even as Chloe is in the middle of pulling her shirt up and over her head. “With my boss. Who you know.”

“Calvin won’t care if you’re late,” Chloe whispers back, her mouth somewhere down Beca’s stomach. It’s hard to tell, Beca’s eyes are closed.

“Right,” Beca says back. “Right. Okay.”

-

Fat Amy has accumulated a crowd of people watching her decimate the Roulette table. Chloe and Beca are sitting at the bar across from her table, Chloe fiddling with the video poker machine and cheering excitedly every time she gets a good hand and wins a dollar, and Beca is mostly just watching Fat Amy - because the kind of insanity that’s taking place needs to be watched. Emily is settled at the table as well, losing left and right, betting against Fat Amy’s very particular picks.

“Are we sure she didn’t load her own ball in there?” Beca asks, glancing over at her girlfriend, who has a Mariners hat pulled low over her eyes.

“Fat Amy’s rule is to never commit crimes unless there are people watching,” Chloe says, sticking out her tongue at the game when she loses fifty cents on her new hand. “So, no. Just lucky.”

“I wish I was that lucky,” Beca mutters, turning back around in her seat in time to see Chloe dial up her bet all the way to a dollar. “Wow, a big spender.”

“I know, right?” Chloe says, grinning and leaning towards Beca to press a kiss to her lips. “And you are already lucky babe. You’ve got me.”

-

It’s the loudest club she’s ever been in. She’s certain of it. When it had been empty, it hadn’t seemed so massive and capable of holding so many goddamn people. But there they all were, losing their minds to her music under the massive and insane chandelier that Chloe still hasn’t quite managed to shut up about it. She can’t really pick out their group - they’re up in the VIP level, she knows, but that’s hard to see when the lights are crazy and people are screaming and she’s having the biggest, most insane high she’s ever had off a crowd. How can people play this kind of club every Friday night?

When she finally gets offstage, sending the crowd away with a raucous remix of “Parade” that sets some people into hysterics, she finds the group hanging outside her little VIP lounge, and there’s a lot of squealing and yelling and she hears Ashley say, “I totally get the chandelier thing now.”

-

On their last night in Vegas, Chloe buys a cheap paper rose off some guy outside the Bellagio fountains and presents it to Beca with a shit-eating, beautiful grin. She’s not much better at dealing with her feelings than she was when she and Chloe started dating, but she knows enough to say I love you when Chloe hands it to her. Fat Amy is singing “Time to Say Goodbye” in anticipation of the fountains, clutching at Ashley like she’s a lifeline, and Stacie is talking to Emily over by the railing with a huge grin, her arm slung around her shoulders. Over by a tree, Jessica and Aubrey are gesturing at each other and whispering heatedly, Jessica holding the itinerary and Aubrey her phone.

Beca’s happy. That’s obvious. And it’s more obvious when Chloe kisses her, leaning in and pressing closer when the music starts up and a distinctive noise of water falling joins it.

She nearly gets shoved straight into the railing when someone shoulder checks Chloe, and Beca grabs ahold of her girlfriend by her hips and prepares to rip into whatever asshole needed so badly to see the show up close and personal that they felt like shoving a beautiful woman was the answer - but she watches as she realizes who it is, as Stacie suddenly moves back towards Aubrey and Benji is there, kneeling on the ground, and Emily is crying.

Beca is crying too, of course, but Chloe doesn’t mention it when she reaches up to wipe away the tears from Beca’s face.

-

“You planned that,” Beca says, staring suspiciously at her girlfriend as Chloe sings her way through the suite, throwing their clothes in a suitcase. “Benji.”

“Well, duh, silly,” Chloe says. She glances up at Beca, who’s sitting at the head of the bed and watching her. “Benji asked for a good way to propose.”

“And you helped him plan it,” Beca says. It’s sort of shocking to her, all of a sudden, how easily Chloe’s intertwined herself in Beca’s life, how she has lunches with Jesse every Thursday, how she helps Benji plan a proposal, how she loves Emily and hugged her for a full forty seconds after Emily and Benji had finally stopped making out.

“Don’t worry babe,” Chloe says, winking and sending a shock right through Beca’s bones. “I’ve still got plenty of ideas for my proposal.”

Beca blinks, as Chloe returns back to their packing, and she lets Chloe’s gentle voice wash through her as she sings her way through the silence. It’s like the moment after a lightning strike, in her heart. She has this. She’s got this, this beautiful, crazy girl who’s obsessed with a damn chandelier and for some reason thinks Beca is the coolest.

“Good,” she says, in response, probably way too late, but Chloe smiles at her like she’s already said yes, and then she’s climbing on the soft, soft bed, and then there’s kissing, and it’s all great, then.

[fitzyhere]

Hi there! I had a few questions for you! What are some of your all time favorite Overwatch memories? Do you enjoy Overwatch less or more than you used to and why? What are your thoughts on the meta? What was your favorite meta? Lastly, what type of character do you think Overwatch needs next? Thanks in advance! ^-^

OHH sorry for the late reply i wanted to answer this when i got on pc cos i knew i’d have a LOT to say

So as far as ovw memories, idk if u mean personal or esports so I’m doing BOTH, with esports first:1. Libero’s hack on Evermore right out the gate on Hanamura. It was the first time I’d seen Sombra in pro play and it SHOOK me to my core seeing her be played AND so well!!2. Zunba’s grav through the window on Eichenwalde. Shit’s legendary. It was one of the first games I’d ever seen since I had just gotten into ovw esports and the High seeing that play gave me made me love esports ever since3. Surefour’s bait from spawn. Fucking iconic. chef kiss. one of the best moments from last season.4. That one game, shortly after Aero became head coach where Mickie was on Winston and Seagull was on D.Va vs NYXL. I love that game so much i need to rewatch it I loved watching them.5. Shanghai’s first victory. A bitch might have cried. I’m not as huge of a fan as many other are on here, but I recognize hard work and Shanghai has been doing their absolute best from the get go. I’m so happy for them.

and now for personal:1. One time, my friend Griffin, my ex, and I all played against Sylphea (at the time she was the highest level player in ovw) and that was REALLY fun. Griffin was on Mei, and he just. fucked them UP, even getting potg. We also had a solid McCree, and I had fun on sym :)2. I used to do widow custom games with friends (mostly 1v1s w phil) but we had a huge boss fight with Griffin, where it was 5 of us against him, and he STILL whooped us. He was such a wicked good widow it’s crazy.3. Before the mercy 2.0 meta, Sombra was my most played hero, because she’s so much fun. I played w friends who liked having a sombra on their team, too so that worked out Nicely. I love playing Sombra4. Back when Comp could get to five rounds on koth, I switched to Bastion on round three, and Griffin was on Ana, and we managed to win with nano tank alone. Three fucking rounds in a row i only died once.5. One comp game I had 23 players rezzed with 3 five man rezzes. We still lost but like holy fuck that was fun. 6. Idk if it’s still in the game, but there was a glitch with mercy’s wings where if she said hello with her gun out and angelic descent was active, her wings would get REALLY big. Griffin and I spent like 2 hours one night just fuckin messin w it it was so fun7. honestly… late night qp w griffin was rly good. nothin like tryharding in overwatch till 5am… i miss that

8. ALSO THIS CLIP

And… when it comes to playing… yeah I definitely enjoy the game less. I used to have a bunch of people I played with, different groups, different needs, so it was really fun when I was really social, but I broke up w my ex, I lost contact with others, and many just don’t play overwatch anymore. Now its rare I’m in anything bigger than a duoq. I spent most of my time in game w Griffin, and when we stopped playing together I had to relearn the game and how I tracked things because we had our Way of playing. I’m still highly invested in the game, hence having and Overwatch League sideblog. I still really love the game, and I don’t think that’s going to change even I don’t play it nearly as much as I used to.

The current meta… is still GOATS right? I havent seen any of stage 2 (im a fake fan who been BUSY) so idk how baptiste has changed anything. But I hate GOATS. I remember disliking triple tank and playing it but GOATS isnt even… fun to watch. I like zen and lucio play, but my fave supports to see are moira and ana. and I love myself a good zarya but Man. Tone it Down.

And as far as favorite meta? Hard to say. I definitely played the most during the mercy meta, and I love watching good mercy play… but I wouldn’t say it’s my favorite to watch. I’d probably go out on a limb and say dive. Dive or Triple tank. Dive could get real creative, but nothin smacks my ass quite like a good ol fashioned deathball comp. There’s pros and cons to every meta, and I have fun with all of it, because overwatch is a Fun Game. Even GOATS has its moments, especially the ways teams try to shut each other down.

And as far as new hero… I’m not sure. Still Tank/Support cos we still have too many dps, but… idk. I really like hybrid heroes, and I’d like another Support/Tank hybrid, but utility heavy heroes are deffo always on my list. But that aside… where the black women at, Jeff? I wanna play as one.

Sorry this is so long, but ty for asking!! I love overwatch so so much It’s so weird to think it’s been with me for almost three years.

[playablekairi]

answer ALL the wlw q’s, please. 1-30!!!! ❤️

WOW thank you!! just skipping the few i’ve already answered. i’m so sorry i don’t know how to insert a read more on mobile this got very long

1. how long have you known you liked girls?

at least around 11-ish years old, but comp het is a demon and i was still seriously questioning whether or not i ‘really’ liked girls until well into my 20s

2. talk about the girl who made you realise you liked girls

despite what question one suggests, this girl came much later. maybe i already knew i Liked girls, but this was when i realized that maybe i Loved girls. i was vulnerable, and confused, and she made me feel listened to. being affectionate with her felt different than it ever had with anyone else. i wanted the world for her, thought the world of her. i loved her very, very dearly, and i’m so grateful to have had someone like her in my life.

3. are you in a relationship at the moment?

i’m not and i’m not like... actively looking for one. if it happens, it happens, but i’m not in the best circumstances to jump into one again yet. there’s a lot of me to work on and a lot of baggage i don’t want to bring into my next relationship.

4. do you have a crush at the moment?

hmm!! maybe? that’s not even me playing coy, i’m honestly still grappling with figuring out whether it’s a crush or not.

5. describe your crush!

there’s a genuine softness to her that never fails to make me smile. she always knows what to say. she gives me time. i want her to have a very happy life. i think she’s beautiful.

6. do you tend to like more masculine, feminine, or androgynous girls?

somewhere between feminine and androgynous, usually. i guess like more feminine than i am, but i wouldn’t call myself into femmes specifically.

7. do you look/dress more masculine, feminine, or androgynous?

i think i’d put myself on the androgynous side of feminine? i like to keep my hair long, and i like to wear a lot of pink and a lot of soft fabrics, but i don’t do very much to ‘perform’ femininity with my appearance anymore and i have a pretty stereotypically lesbian wardrobe.

8. what’s your gaydar like?

beyond atrocious. downright humiliating. we do not speak of it.

9. tall girls or short girls?

i definitely have a Thing for tall girls but it’s not in any way a requirement. being slightly taller/almost the same height as my ex was actually quite nice? my other partners before were all much taller so that was a nice change of pace.

10. intimidating girls or kind girls?

there’s something about ‘intimidating girls’ that feels like it implies conflict. i would rather be with a kind girl who is assertive but doesn’t seek out conflict, and i would rather be that kind of girl myself, too.

11. hugs or kisses?

look okay i live for Good Hugs. kisses are great but you know those hugs where you’re pressed completely together and wound around each other? the way hands can travel from the back of your neck and across your shoulders down your waist to the small of your back? *chef kiss* i like kissing but i also find it distracting, i can’t think when i’m kissing. with a good hug i’m there in the moment.

12. do you have an ideal ‘type’? what would they be like?

not really? like all my fantasies about my future wife take no form i can’t ever actually picture her in any way. maybe because then i’d feel too lonely lol.

actually wait i take that back: my ideal type is two wives.

13. what’s your favourite personality trait of yours?

okay i not have done enough therapy to answer this question without melting down! try again later!

15. what’s the best thing about liking girls?

often much easier to share clothes.

16. do you have any friends who are wlw?

i do!! probably most of them. the token straights are friends from work.

17. have you ever been to pride? if so, what was your first pride like?

my first pride was right at the tail-end of my very long, very arduous ‘am i bi or am i lesbian’ internal debate. i had my cheeks painted the bi flag colours. i went with people i felt safe and comfortable around. i came home feeling like maybe putting so much emotional effort into defining myself wasn’t productive, and that i didn’t have to be so scared of the world lesbian.

18. do you like the lesbian flag?

i /love/ it. bitches love pink (im bitches)

the variant that goes from pink to orange with five stripes i think is very nice and i wouldn’t mind that becoming the most recognizable one.

19. what was your first kiss with a girl like?

you know when you go outside before dawn when it’s been snowing? the way everything is kind of muffled and insulated, and that very specific colour of the clouds? like that.

21. what’s your favourite lgbt+ movie?

oh hands down no contest absolutely ‘imagine me and you.’ the first time i saw it still rings as one of the first times i felt like maybe i could have a real love story with another girl, that the choice wasn’t between ‘force yourself to create a happy love story with a boy’ or ‘be with a girl but risk never being able to get a happy ending with her’

22. who’s your favourite openly wlw celebrity?

i’ve unironically become a big fan of kristen stewart. i absolutely love stephanie beatriz. alyson stoner’s coming out essay resonated so deeply with me. tessa thompson is incredible and so ridiculously beautiful. don’t make me pick one lmao.

23. do you wear makeup?

very infrequently. i hate putting it on, i hate taking it off, i hate feeling like i can’t do anything that might smudge it so i need to move carefully and frequently monitor it (insert conversation about the performative ornamentality of expected femininity here). but i won’t pretend like it doesn’t make me feel pretty and won’t act like i don’t make sure that when i post pictures of myself i try to be wearing makeup in them, i definitely still have that pressure.

24. who was the first person you came out to (if you have)?

coming out in general was so long ago that i honestly don’t know, but the first person i told i was a lesbian was my little sister. it was the first time i had ever said ‘i’m a lesbian’ out loud. i cried.

25. has anyone ever come out to you?

yes. a lot of people, actually. maybe i have a good vibe for it.

26. have you found a community of lgbt+ people?

honestly? not really. i mostly keep to myself and i don’t participate much. i would like to, though.

27. do you have any older lgbt+ people you look up to?

i have two wonderful elderly gay aunts who sometimes post on facebook about how much they love each other and i just... can’t wait for that.

28. do you identify with butch/femme labels?

i don’t. all the power to people who do, it’s just not really for me.

29. who’s your favourite fictional wlw?

scorpia in the she-ra reboot is absolutely to die for, i fucking love her.