#despite that it didn't end up completely terrible so i'm kinda proud of myself in all honesty

[undertalethingies]

The Third Worst Day

Loosely inspired by the ninth chapter of @undertalethingems Unexpected Guests comic, and by the end of John Mulaney’s Delta Airlines bit. (“In fact, we’re gonna frame you for MURDER! [...] ~Because we’re Delta Airlines, and life is a fucking nightmare~”)

Sans was not having the shittiest day of his life, because everyone was on the surface and Frisk was being nice this timeline. 

The second shittiest day, though- well, no, not that either, technically speaking. Nothing was on fire except maybe Undyne’s house underground, and that just because no one could be bothered to put it out when everyone was moving to the surface anyway. (Please don’t ask about the second shittiest day of Sans’ life, he will not tell you and will instead have flashbacks)

Ugh, it was really indicative that this BS only ranked third.

So, the curtain opens on the third shittiest day of Sans’ life, and maybe, like, the eighth worst thing to ever happen to him.

What could be bad enough to rank on Sans’ top ten worst days list, though? (which is a list he actually made once, as a joke, and then he looked at it and kind of wanted to cry, before laughing instead because that’s just how Sans copes with things)

Well, you see, he was being framed for murder.

Flowey, specifically, was currently attempting to frame him for the death of the old royal scientist, W.D Gaster, who Sans had met maybe once in his entire life.

Admittedly, the fact that he actually remembered said meeting, and that there had been a previous royal scientist at all, was highly unusual.

He didn’t remember for anywhere close to the reasons Flowey was insinuating, though. No, the reason Sans remembered the old royal scientist had very little to do with the scientist himself and a lot more to do with how remembering across timelines was triggered in the first place.

Cross-timeline memory retention (which are the Official Science Words for it) was triggered by high levels of Determination. No more, no less. And Sans had very high DT levels for a monster. It was pretty much the only reason he’d managed to make it to adulthood with just a single point of HP to his name. (Undyne remembered a bit too, he suspected, though he’d never called her on it)

So the reason Sans remembered the existence of Gaster was the same reason he had what little knowledge he did of the RESETs, though he remembered far less of those, due to having fewer triggers for the memories to resurface. (The fact that no one knew who had built the CORE had been enough for Sans’ mind to fill in the blanks)

Flowey was saying that Sans remembered because he’d known the guy, which was just flat out wrong. The weed was insinuating that Sans couldn’t possibly due the things he did without being a scientist, which was partially true, and finally accusing him of killing Gaster, either to steal his research or because Sans was the Judge, (Nice of Flowey to out him, the little shit) which was blatant slander.

Sans could see that the others (excluding Alphys, who knew the story was bullshit) didn’t want to believe what Flowey was saying, but he could also see that, despite that fact, he was still convincing them.

Flowey, after all, was a very skilled liar. Especially when it came to convincing people of crazy backstories he’d concocted on the spot. It made sense, since he’d had rather a lot of practice.

As Flowey finished his story, Sans looked at Alphys. He texted her a question about an old promise he’d made to her that was suddenly not one he was sure he should keep. (He’d do it anyway, if she asked, but breaking it would make disproving Flowey’s allegations that much easier.)

“And that’s why- are you on your PHONE?” Flowey interrupted himself, looking hilariously offended for someone who was actively framing a guy for murder.

“Is that how little you care? You killed him and you can’t even be bothered to hear out the allegation?” Oh, so that’s how he was playing it. Sans narrowed his eyes, just a bit, before responding.

“eh, you looked like you were having fun. wouldn’t want to interrupt, ya know?” Earlier in the conversation, when Sans was still actively participating, Flowey had interrupted him several times. Alphys snickered at his jab, and hit the send button on her phone.

Sans checked the text, and inwardly sighed in relief. Seemed like he could take the easy way out here.

“Sans, please put away your phone. This is a serious conversation,” Toriel said. Sans supposed he had to agree to disagree on that one. This wasn’t much of a conversation at all as much as it was Flowey using his knowledge to manipulate the room in a way that allowed him to frame Sans for murder.

“yeah, don’t worry, tori. it was relevant,” She looked as if she doubted that, but she didn’t say anything. Sans sent Alphys a quick thank-you and stuck the offending device back in his pocket. He turned to look at Flowey, who probably would have shrunk from the ice in his gaze if Flowey had ever bothered to figure out how to read his expressions.

“so, you done, pal?” There were several winces around the room at the vitriol present in his tone, but none of them belonged to Flowey.

“Yeah, I think I’ve made my point pretty clear!” Flowey looked positively cheerful at the thought.

“good, ‘cause i’m getting pretty tired of hearing you speak. don’t want a repeat of the last time you tried something like this, right?” Last time Flowey had attempted something like this with Sans present, the weed had still been in control of the timeline. Sans had killed him before he could even finish his speech.

“Ha! You wouldn’t dare! Not when Frisk is-” Flowey cut himself off before he could dig all three of them (four of them?) into a hole they really wouldn’t be able to talk their way out of. Frisk shot him a glare, with an expression that said they’d probably kill Flowey themselves, if he didn’t shut his trap. The weed gulped audibly.

“A-anyway! Are you gonna explain yourself, trashbag?” Papyrus made the same pinched expression he always did when Flowey used that particular moniker.

“heh. sure, why not,” Sans’ grin turned predatory. 

“i’m not gonna bother asking you to back your claims with evidence, since we both know you don’t actually have any,” Flowey narrowed his eyes, probably thinking of a thousand ways to justify that, but Sans continued without giving a chance.

“you’re right that i used to be a scientist, so kudos for that, i guess. my leaving the field had nothing to do with gaster, though. it actually happened quite a while after that,” Sans preferred not to talk about this, but with Flowey forcing his hand, it seemed like the simplest solution.

“my leaving had nothing to do with gaster, and everything to do with the experiments that got alph fired,”

--

When Sans had been younger and more optimistic, he’d wanted to be a scientist more than anything in the world. He’d spend hours combing through the dump for old textbooks, and the few he found, he’d pore over until he had them practically memorized.

So when an ad went out saying that the new royal scientist was looking for an assistant, he’d jumped at the opportunity. Sans had spent hours studying for the required tests, barely even eating in his complete dedication to the task before him.

Sans didn’t know whether he’d had the highest score, or if he’d been selected for his blue magic, (a rare ability that was extremely useful for engineering) or if had simply been because he lived so close to the lab at the time, but he got the job. He’d celebrated for a day straight, and would probably have irritated the hell out of Papyrus if they’d been living together at the time. (Sans was in that young adult phase where he lived alone in a shitty apartment because he was trying to be independent)

When he’d first met Alphys, he was not ashamed to admit to having geeked out a bit. She was considered one of the greatest minds of their generation, after all. 

He’d tried to keep it to a minimum, though, (correctly) figuring that she wouldn’t have much use for him as an assistant if he was too busy with hero worship to contribute anything.

Though they’d been awkward together at first, they’d quickly warmed up to each other, and soon at least half of the new innovations exiting the lab had their roots in Sans’ ideas as much as Alph’s.

Quickly enough, they’d become best friends.

And then…

Then had come the Determination experiments.

Both Alphys and Sans had agreed it would be best not to allow the amalgamates out of the True Lab. Alphys had confined herself to her workplace, moving in a bed and her anime collection so she’d only have to leave for the occasional grocery run.

Sans had kept his status as her assistant under wraps, though, so he didn’t have to worry about being cornered by the victims’ families like she did. Papyrus had mentioned recently that he was looking for someone to go in halfsies with him on a housing lease in Snowdin, so Sans did what he did best, and ran away from his problems, packing his stuff and moving just about as far from Hotland as it was possible to get without entering the Ruins.

He and Alph stayed friends, though. When you’re the only two people who know about a catastrophic disaster like that, it kinda brings you together.

--

Sans finished his explanation with a nod to Alphys, before saying,

“and as for gaster, the only connection i’ve got to the guy is that i named an attack after him in honor of his scientific prowess,”

The room was silent for a few moments as everyone thought through his words. Suddenly, Flowey said,

“Yeah, that’s all well and good, but how did you even know about him? Everyone else forgot he ever existed!” Sans smiled secretively.

“probably the same way you do, asriel,” Let no one say he couldn’t give as good as he got. If Sans had to share his backstory, well.

Might as well take the flower down with him.

[the-stray-liger]

when your current art looks shitty compared to what you used to do that's when you know your getting better at it

ive got an old sketch on my wall from middle school of Typical Not Self-Insert Character In Cool Armor With Giant Sword. It's incredible. How did I do that. I can't draw like that now.

but I can SEE this old picture, despite the embarrassment around it's actual subject, is actually good. When I first hung it up way back when it was just because I wished I had a sword. Now I look at the confident lines, the shading, the grasp of depth perception on so many angular objects, the way the cloth of the cape falls in folds that have weight to them. I can recognize what makes it a nice drawing. I couldn't do that before.

there's this thing i read about once where people who are getting better at a skill go through this cycle of This Is Impossible to WOW I'M SO GREAT AT THIS to I Have Lost The Ability To Preform Even The Most Basic Part Of This And Should Fire Myself Forever

and then slowly they realize they can kinda do it again. Hey, they can even do that one thing they've never been able to do before!

rinse, recycle, repeat. Every year I go through it. Depression doesn't help. For a few years I didn't draw anything at all and almost burned all my old sketches. Now I'm doodling ducktale characters and making fat circular birds with twig legs.

I aged out of school and have never had a job (thank you family for not letting me starve) and my whole damn life people have been asking me why I don't sell my drawings.

because I can't draw, I tell them, staring at the things I made two years ago and couldn't replicate now if someone put gun to my head.

but sometimes, for a few months, I can. I can sit down and have an idea and make it happen. Sometimes the idea is a favorite character. Sometimes its just a random pattern of flowers. Every time it happens I'm scared it'll be the last time.

Then I remind myself of all the other people who go though some version of this stupid cycle. If you like drawing, you'll probably draw again someday- maybe not in the same style as you used to- but if it makes you happy you'll do it for the happy feelings, and if you draw you'll get better at it, and as you get better you'll learn to see all the flaws, and you'll get discouraged, and that's normal.

I also remind myself of how other people always seem to like the drawings I'm least happy with, and pass over the ones I'm actually proud of. People have different taste. Everyone else's sucks compared to mine, for example, which a completely true and unbiased fact (lol).

Right now I can draw because I never show any of my drawings to anyone. They're for me. Mine. And the voice in the back of my head chattering about wasting time and being a useless burden can go stuff itself.

Yesterday I drew a cartoon duck. It sucks. I had a lot of fun WHILE making it though. And the duck looks a lot better than it did when I first drew one a week ago. Practice makes progress. Talent is bullshit. Skills are learned and maintained.

so my advice is draw something badly and giggle while you do.

Hey anon! You're absolutely right. I remember back when I was drawing fulll time going thru a couple art blocks where everything I made looked awful bc I was learning to look at it with more critical eyes and my hands hadn't caught up yet. I feel like that's a big part of my burnout too-I suddenly learned a lot of theory and I had come to a point where I hadn't developped the skills to match and it destroyed a lot of my confidence and self esteem

It's also that at the end of the day I forgot who I was drawing for bc I was so obsessed with social media recognition and with algorithms and stuff the harder I worked the less notifications I got

And I generally have a HUGE problem with guilt and feeling like a burden too like I feel you 600% on that lol I always felt terrible bc I couldn't make a living out of my art

I think Im gonna work again on making art that's only for me and drawing things I enjoy even if it's not like the best quality or quantity. I'm gonna take it slow (even if it drives me up the wall) and have fun again!

Thank you so much for the kind word and advice!!

[inessencedevided]

The Untamed, episode 25 - watching notes

This is what i got for Easter. An Egg-cup with a "no drama lama" on it :D I will be completely disregarding it's good advice and keep on watching these dramatic gay bitches

Also, when I told my mum that I'd go and watch another episode of the untamed, she said "ah, the show with the beautiful men". I did not correct her. :D

I got some tissues ready, as to the advice of several people 😅

I love wwx with kids :)

And is that genuine smile I spot there? :')

I love jc's little "what was I supposed to do about it" shrug to wwx :D

Jin Zixuan isn't that terrible (he really did get some growth in during and before the sunshot campaign), but I think I'm rather in line with wwx and jc that just because he's not terrible, doesn't mean he's good enough for Shijie

But then again it is her decision and I'm really glad that wwx and jc don't even try to persuade her in any direction. With his patriarchal this society is structured that seems anything but self-evident

Okay, Jin Zixuan's little outburst of genuine joy at her acceptance is kinda cute

I think we just fast-forwarded to the night hunt

Wwx's excited wave at his sister! 😭

Everyone looks already done with this party before it even really started

Lan Wangji even has his eyes closed at some point, like he's slowly counting down from ten :D

Holy shit! Well, fuck you too!!!

(I know I said I wouldn't curse but this warrants cursing and nothing else!)

Seriously???? They're now using political prisoners as targets in a tournament???

Okay, they're not targets. They're human obstacles before the target. Not much better

Me @ jin Zixuan

Okay sorry, but when that other Jin guy started bragging all I could think was "okay, we get it. Now stop your dick-measuring-contest and do something useful" 😒

I'M SCREAMING! Did wwx just actually asked for lwj's headband in front of everyone??? He might as well have started snogging him right then and there 😂😂😂😂

Lan Wangji doesn't even dignify that with an answer :D

Wwx .... he doesn't even have a bow

Okay, blindfolded

Okay, there's the bow

That was ... so hot

Perfect gif for wwx, btw

I feel this is going to bite him in the ass later, but for now I'm glad to see jin Guangyao and jin Guangshan humiliated :D

Also, lwj microexpressions are everything here 😏

And wwx, looking at him like a little puppy. See, see, see? I performed the trick! 🤩

Lol. Wwx just killed it so much that they just cancelled the whole opening. I feel like it's kind of indicative of his role going forward. A rupture in the system.

I just legit cried when wwx played his flute. Somehow, with forest reminding me a bit of Austria, it made me really homesick for the Alps. :')

Wwx looking so excited for a second to see lwj, but then deflating as he remembers lan Xichen's words is too much. 😥 Sweety, I'm sure he wants to know. You don't have to bear it all alone 😔

Aaaaaaahhhhhhh!!!!!

He wants to share your love song with you and you push him away on purpose you STUPID HERO!!!!

I never want to see that expression on lan Wangji's face again! 😭

I took a screenshot. See what I mean???

He opened up! Lan Wangji, mister stone-faced-and-sturdy opened up!!! And got rejected!!!

Also, with your flirting and the headband line earlier, you're sending really mixed signals here, wwx!!

And wwx regrets it instantly :/

The life-long confidant line 😭 (also, confession, I've seen a post stating that this could also be translated as "soulmate", which... highnhg)

"I still am" *clutches chest*

Please tell me they kiss during this scene in the book!!!! (Actually don't because spoilers, but still ...)

2 minutes of longing staring later ...

Oh Jin Zixuan, you daft idiot 🤦‍♀️ not everything is about you

Not that wwx is making things better right now...

Protective lan Wangji to the rescue!

Oh, I like madame Jin!!!

I appreciate wwx's concern for Yanli, but COULD YOU PLEASE NOT SOEAK FOR YOUR SISTER, SHE HAS HER OWN MOUTH! THANK YOU!

Sorry ... I know he specifically forced the clans to listen to her instead of deciding over her head.

Soooo ... wwx snapped 😬

Wangji and Shijie calming him down gives me all the feels 😭 I hope we see more of them working together. Despite their different personalities I feel they would get along well.

"There are three things all wise men fear: the sea in storm, a night with no moon, and the anger of a gentle man." Make that woman and apply it to Shijie. That icy anger in her gentle face? You should be terrified

Also, I just wanted to point out that during this 5 minute scene, with several different people speaking, Lan Wangji's eyes haven't left wei Wuxian even once

Yanli: "it's not his fault you can't hunt the prey." Oh SNAP

I'm so proud of Yanli right now :')

Jin Guangyao... at this point I feel a sense if dread when he appears. Though I am interested what he and Lan Xichen were doing alone in the woods

Wait FIVE THOUSAND participants? 😳

Where were they during the opening ceremony? They didn't hire that many extras for sure

Jin Zixuan is about to confess his feelings and immediately starts to get an audience. I love how, in this show, there's no drama without spectators 😂😂😂

I feel almost bad for him

Jiang Cheng is way too late to the party

If these cultivators weren't zo gossipy 90% of the drama of this show could be avoided, I swear

Could you please not listen to them Jiang cheng? 🤦‍♀️

*fist clench of suppressed man-pain*

Wen Qing! My love! 🥺🥺🥺

"I want to bring a man to cloud recess." That's basically lwj confessing he has a boyfriend to his brother, right? Right?

Meanwhile Lan Xichen, internally: finally 🙄

My heart

The tenderness in his voice when he says "bring him back and hide him there."

Lan Wangji must be terrified for wwx at this point. I'm kind of bewildered that all his efforts at this point seem to be centred around wwx. Like, I knew this ship would be intense, but ... whoa

What a beautiful scene to end an episode on :)

Also, to take stock. I did need the tissues, but only once and not during a scene that many people would, I think. I'm bracing myself for the next couple of episodes now

Also, I'm now half-way through the show. I both want to get through it quicker and prolong this experience to make it last longer. What a strange feeling 😅

@sweetlittlevampire @fandom-glazed @elenirlachlagos @allhailthedramallama @luckymoon @kyrrahbird 💚🐇💚