#disclaimer that i always add here: i am not religious. as far as being a christian is concerned

[jesusology]

my jesus obsession extends to creating a story based around it with one of the ocs being SO jesus coded it is felt viscerally. i have a sickness

[itsagrimm]

Research Special

I have been asked to share my notes and references to 'He Who Comes from under the Water'. So here is my ongoing list of myths, fables, tales, practices or customs i have referenced so far.

People from central & eastern Europe are explicitly invited to add, argue or disagree with stuff they are familiar with.

Disclaimer: While I enjoy many traditional stories & practices, this is not a trad life safe space. Regressive misanthropes, fascists, right wingers, racists, anti-feminists and science deniers be gone. Romanticism may be my personal escapism and access to some of my heritage, which I am willing to share with you. But this is not a white supremacists playground in fairy tale costume. You guys are always the evil in my stories. Stay away.

König is a Vodyanoy or водяно́й. It's a re-occurring character and entity in many eastern European and slavic stories. There is not one version of Vodyanoy. Depending on the region and story they are all slightly different with Western Slavs leaning to a more elegant (?) Vodník who might even pass as human, likes tobacco offerings and tea pots to keep souls in, while the eastern Slavs tend to have more stories of a wild king who fears nothing and "enslaves" aka drowns anyone who crosses his kingdom. What most of these stories share is that this very powerful entity, is playful and open to bargains or games. It's possible that many fairy tales and characters stem from old pagan gods and traditions which explain the amount of power and connection to the land. The name Vodyanoy is literally translatable as 'he who comes from under the water'.

The heron & the fox is a fable written by Aesop. I would also like to add that the fox is a re-occuring fable animal in may central & eastern European stories in which it is considered a clever animal. Also in at least Russian the fox often is considered female while the german stories tend to name the fox as male.

Curses and being cursed here in this context is a more central European witch hunt reference. The villager Ivar wants readers property and goes after her, claiming she is cursed and due to being a woman not allowed to own the land of her family. During Medieval times in central Europe many peasant women owned the land in the same way as men did, being bound to the same expectations of service and work. Not saying that peasant women in the central European Middle Ages had many personal liberties bc simply the concept of personal liberties and governance was a different one, but since they were expected to work the land in the same way as men did, it is odd to not allow the reader to work the land of her dead family. Claiming something as unprovable as being cursed, is at least in the historic context more a post medieval attempt to strategically disenfranchise the vulnerable female coded reader by playing up religious, mostly christian fears, to get her land. Witch hunts were not a massive phenomenon in Eastern Europe, but rather common Modern Times occurrences until the 18th century especially in german speaking regions where they noticeably affected disenfranchised groups like women*, the poor, the sick, jewish communities, migrants, ... This is in basically in any german history class book for school. But I can also recommend this or this.

The idea of marriages between human women and male animal/magical beings/gods/spirits/etc is very common theme appearing nearly everywhere on the globe. I concentrated on german tales about animal-human-marriages, especially tales from the Gebrüder Grimm Collection. The Gebrüder Grimm fairy tale collection is a collection of german tales from 1812. Unlike the Disney retellings of fairy tales this german collection is brütäl, meaning it never really got reworded much since the 18th century, mirroring what the brothers considered a fine and acceptable story to tell to kids. In the 18th century. As you can imagine that was very different to what we consider appropriate for kids now. Anyway, I did a closer reading on the german "Froschkönig", "Schneeweißchen & Rosenrot" and the "Eisenhans" tales. They include cursed swamp being, cursed bear and cursed frog. Especially in Froschkönig the princess is the vocal point of the story while being forced into a marriage with a frog. Also, the story has many sexual undertones and especially the early male psychologist carl jung had a blast writing about a young woman's sexuality, ignoring her lack of agency in the whole scenario (wtf carl.). Eisenhans is different for it is about a prince and is essentially the male, more action including version but it includes a dangerous but also somewhat helpful underwater being which drowns whoever comes to it. Finally "Schneeweißchen & Rosenrot" shows a bear as a protector for the then later brides. As you can guess I draw a lot of the psychological impacts especially from Froschkönig for the Reader perspective. Also, lot's of food references.

Female owlets cry ‘Kowitt!” which sounds like the german ‘komm mit’ / ‘come with me’. Therefore, it is said in German folklore that the owlets are birds of death wanting to take a soul with them or warning of the impending death of those who listen to it because it was heard so much around the dead and dying. Owlets and many other nightly birds of prey were hunted because of that in German speaking regions. The real reason for owlets crying around the dead is a different one: the lights of the wake for the dead drew the birds in at night.

Herbs might be something we consider magical now during an honestly odd revival of new age mysticism. But it likely wasn't magical per se in the same way for European central & eastern people in the undefined past. Of course there are stories and legend about magical herbs like the herb 'Moly' in the Odyssee. But the use of herbs just to flavour food can be found in the Edda the same way teas and foods are used to help with flavouring food, keeping healthy and curing sickness till this day without being magical. It's just practical to use what is at hand. Reader drinking a sage tea, which is a wild plant widely available basically everywhere is exactly that. If you want to try it, i recommend adding some honey. But please don't buy white sage just to make tea from it. That's wasteful considering the importance white sage has in other practices I am not familiar with when one can use Common Sage.

Because hair in whatever length or form is beautiful but requires work, many traditional hair styles for longer hair from the especially the eastern European region include ‘косы’ or braids/plaits. It's a very practical way of keeping your hair tidy and out of the way during a days work. Head coverings for female presenting people from the region also play an important role. The most known ones are head scarfs known as 'платки', they are beautiful scarfs with often flowery motives. Depending on the region of origin the patterns will be different. Платки used to be associated with being married and being older but not so much anymore as it can also be just worn as protection against the elements or as an accessory. Платки also play a role in various religious practices for both christian and muslims as well as cultural pride so I recommend doing serious research before just wearing this type of head covering just because you find it beautiful. I remember being called names for wearing this traditional dress so for someone just to take it and 'play' with it without learning more first, feels off to me. Another important head wear I plan on referencing is the 'кокошник' which is something like a crown or tiara worn by mostly married female presenting people. I remember seeing the кокошник drawn on basically all queens and princesses in my fairy tale books as a kid so you bet I will give reader one.

The swamp light's are another staple in many parts of the world where swamps exist. The German folklore know them as 'Irrlicht' or 'Sumpflicht' and consider them evil doers trying to lure wanderers into the dangerous swamps or just off the road. Slavic tales also associate the lights in the swamp with something bad. There is the entity of the 'боло́тник' who lives in the swamp and likes to lure people in by lighting up those fires, making animal noises and confusing wanderers by intoxicating them with gas from dangerous herbs. The боло́тник is not as common and I only read up on this creature as research for HWCFUTW since he does very similar things as the водяно́й and more stories are about him as the generally associated being ruling all types of waters.

At last:

Generally speaking I noticed a leaning in especially english speaking media to see everything slavic as culturally Russian, and everything German-speaking as from the whole of Germany. That is a dangerous simplification. If you want to learn and research more on your own about those regions and their traditions & stories i have to stress the importance of local culture and complex diversity in those regions.

Also, if you liked this I can do a follow up post about my references in my writing once I have introduced a bit more.

@thesinsoflust @kdkj122920 @die-prophetin @lillianastuff @1234ilikecowsthanyoumore

[i-cast-teatus-deletus]

Part 0 - Blind Spots

These aren't "disclaimers" or anything, just stuff that you need to keep in mind as you read along with this blog. Every one of these facts should be appended at the end with, "so if you are not in the situation, you may need to do something different than what we are doing."

I will probably keep adding to this list as I think of more things that might need mentioned here.

We are, unfortunately, USAmericans

We own our home

Our house is always chilly, even in summer

We deliberately picked a house that is in-town (albeit a smallish Appalachian town) so we don't drive far for groceries, the pharmacy, etc

One of the guys has his own bedroom, and the other one shares it with me

We have people living in our home who are 100% on board to help with aftercare stuff, including someone who works from home.

We are all moderately handy with medical/home care stuff, are not squeamish, and are able to do all of those tasks safely and hygienically

We don't have kids. Our pets consist of two adult cats and some fish.

We don't have to travel extensively for consults or for surgery (probably 90-120 mins each way for everything)

Both guys are moderately skilled at sewing, and we own a mid-tier sewing machine. The one guy sewed his own dress for his senior prom, which was a big fluffy 18th century-inspired thing with a crinoline. There's a few things we intend to sew rather than buy, especially a Comfort Pillow since it's basically just a long rectangle. (I suggested somewhere to buy a pattern and got "I don't need a pattern for that, it's a pillow.")

We intend to keep the overwhelming majority of the items we are purchasing even after both surgeries are done (because we will end up having injuries or surgeries we didn't anticipate and most of this stuff is nice for recovering from other issues as well). Some of it may end up being repurposed or converted into something else (see the previous point ), but we intend to sell or give away very little. It's the other reason we're doing this much research.

We already own a shower chair (though we're actively looking for a nicer one), which you should consider getting if you're able to. We also already have a 7" Squatty Potty on each of the toilets in the house already (which you also definitely consider if you don't have one)

We desperately want natural fabrics (cotton, linen, silk) and are willing to pay more to get pajamas and shirts that aren't polyester.

We are not deeply concerned if something is Men's Clothing or Women's Clothing, and that extends to not just brand/size but color, cut, etc.

The guys both have short (ear-length or shorter) hair and intend to keep it at least that short into the future. My goal is to get them haircuts in the week before surgery, and if they want to go even SHORTER for recovery, I will not stop them.

I am going to be washing their hair/helping them wash their hair after surgery and we have a decent-ish spot in the house to do so.

Both guys in question are FOR SURE getting double incision surgery due to the amount of tissue that will need to be removed.

None of us are religious and have a pretty big aversion to Christianity in general (which may not sound relevant, but try looking for literally anything on Pinterest written by someone who isn't a loud and proud evangelical Christian)

And, while we're listing things to keep in mind, I'll just add these here too:

I use top surgery resources specifically for people who are trans pretty much interchangeably with mastectomy resources for cis women. Obviously, if you don't want to hear about cis women having mastectomies (even if they have info I thought was useful and have already been vetted by someone who isn't cis for offputting female-centric content), do not click on them. I will do my absolute best to tag them [#mastectomy resources for cis women] and mention it in the text of the post as well in case tagging fails. The primary thing to keep in mind about mastectomy resources for cis women is that a mastectomy on a cis woman is a MUCH more invasive surgery (often with multiple additional steps depending on how much tissue is being removed, what kind of reconstruction, etc.), so the recovery at roughly every stage is about double the length of top surgery and that's assuming there's no complications. It's nice to see what they needed for their 8-10 week layup with similar restrictions, but I think it would be easy to overbuy if you use them exclusively since you will be actually laid up for a substantially shorter length of time.

I'm currently tagging general surgery resources with [#general surgery resources] and mentioning they are not top surgery specific resources in the text of the post. Although I've read them over before posting them, general surgery resources may and probably will give advice that conflicts with advice a top surgeon (or your top surgeon in particular) would give.

I am currently unsure what surgery goals are for the guys after top surgery, but I'll likely continue to do similar stuff for hysto/whatever else if they decide to do it.

While "top surgery shopping with a goal of having the MOST ethical top surgery recovery" is certainly someone's goal, it's not the goal of our recovery or blog. There's NO ethical consumption under capitalism, and I am trying desperately to maximize my purchasing power. So, I have bought stuff for this blog on Amazon and Sam's Club, and will probably continue to do so if their prices are dramatically better for the items I'm after.

[aresstan]

Ancestor work as a concept is absolutely a beautiful part of Heathenry- I love learning about it and hearing of experiences secondhand. I myself probably won’t get into it just simply because of time reasons (I am VERY busy from my job and I don’t have a lot of energy to begin with) and also, a good portion of my ancestors were genuinely evil. It’s just not something I’m comfortable with doing for myself. Idc what others do with ancestry work, but I do want to talk about the experiences I’ve had with being pressured into it.

I’ve also noticed sometimes among certain Heathens (obviously not every single one who talks about ancestor work- I’m talking about a particularly loud group of toxic reconstructionists who are in the minority), that some of them act like you HAVE to do ancestor veneration in order to be a real Heathen or norse pagan. It really gets on my nerves when these particular people within our faith try to pressure people into doing it by flat out refusing to listen to a person who isn’t comfortable doing it. Even if their reasons are legit- as in abusive family members, or horrible family members, or simple reasons such as it’s not physically attainable, due to work or physical circumstances. I understand you can avoid these particular family members and find others, but I still think it’s quite rude and borderline controlling to tell a newbie that they HAVE to. I was in a huge discord server full of Heathens, it’s unfortunately very popular, and it was filled with a lot of recons who clearly viewed their methods of practice superior to others. Haven’t noticed this on tumblr at all, and I’m not vague posting about anybody on tumblr, just to clarify lol. The entire time I was in this particular server and I asked a question, I very rarely got a straight answer with *options* for worship, and almost always got answered with somebody just telling me what to do and becoming very judgmental when I didn’t want to do it for whatever reason. It was a whole headache and a half. I’ve since left that server and my other friends have too (for far more serious reasons as this, those reasons are legit problematic and I won’t get to them here).

The point of this post though is that it is never, ever okay to make a person feel like they have an obligation to add something into their religious practice just because it’s beneficial to you, or just because it was done in ancient times. Even though this particular Heathenry focused group I was in said it was anti-bigotry (which uh. Kinda wasnt but again I’m not talking about that in this post), it was still extremely hostile because it just was not friendly to beginners or people who didn’t want to be reconstructionists. We will never have adequate online spaces based in our faith if we sit there and act like newbies have to fall in line and fit a certain practice/aesthetic. It’s oppressive to a person’s individuality- not following rules, but a group of people trying to instill those rules by using shame or any other tool. It was genuinely unhealthy for me and others- it ended up preventing me from connecting with my deities in the long run, and I have friends I personally know who were shamed and yelled at for completely menial things. Anyways. If someone from that old server still follows me I’m gonna be eaten alive in a few but all of you dicks can kiss my ass LMAO.

But basically TLDR: please avoid Heathens who pressure you into pursuing a certain spiritual practice that you do not feel comfortable with or do not want to do. It’s probably also wise to just avoid any pagan in general who acts like their way of practicing is the Only Correct Way to exist. It will save a lot of drama.

Also disclaimer: TALKING about these things is not social pressure for Heathens to practice. It’s just talking and educating, and I will never have a problem with that at all- there is no way we will grow in our own faiths without learning something.

[classpectcurse]

glossary intro

disclaimer: okay finally writing up my glossary -- this is for my own reference. im RIGHT but dont fuckin ask me to defend this i’m too tired. you can dm me i guess but i’ll only respond if i think theres a point worth debating. i’ll substantiate with examples whenever relevant but this is a definitive guide of my interpretation. i am NOT tagging this because i don’t want anyone to fuckin see this besides the people i’ve told about this tumblr ok. will probably edit and update as i remember things.

anyway, classpect. system of character classification. it entails class + aspect and what it reflects is a characters core character traits. it is the nature before the nurture. your base character template before life experiences, personal quirks and everything else gets layered on on top. classpect generally determines a character’s impact on their environment and the people around them.

most clearly seen in fictional characters since a) their peak performance/impact is far more evident when looking at their personal development and character arc and b) physical impacts can be demonstrated through fiction in a way that doesn’t happen irl; besides literal magic powers (which don’t always map 100% cleanly anyway) thematically relevant motifs, life-changing plot events as well. more on that in the aspect section.

irl it often is most observable/confirmable in interpersonal impact, so you would look at their effect on the people around them –– what role do they fill in a group setting? how do people change from being in their presence? what energy do they bring to the social interaction? (on energy –– more on that in vibespecting) 

general disclaimers under the cut (i will not interact with people who don’t take these disclaimers to heart)

anyway classpect is fun and useful but a few general disclaimers for classpecting.:

- don’t take it too seriously. like, it is REAL and it is INTERESTING and it is very fun to read into, but don’t use classpect to prescribe what you think you need to be like, or as a basis to pass judgement on others. the later discussion will talk about flaws, and strengths, and general vibes. they all have a basis in truth obviously, or else i wouldn’t mention it, but some can be misread or exaggerated. in the past people have taken those definitions and used it to make themselves and others very, very miserable. it’s literally about superhero powers from a stupid webcomic. don’t take it so seriously.

- there is no room for interpretation here ok. there is a right and a wrong definition. this is not an area where room for disagreement is really possible, except in specific classpecting since that can take time to observe and really identify a person’s behaviour and impact. i’m open to improving my definitions and especially terminology, but just so you know. for my purposes i’m generally right. i’ve spent EIGHT YEARS (gross) hammering out my understanding. there are people out there who have very very different interpretations that i have gone through and disagreed with but i DO NOT have the time to dig that shit up. if you disagree with me massively please just go away

- no master classes. master classes are very cool in theory but they do not exist in real life. the whole point of the 12/12 classpect system is that it places all people on equal footing; no class or aspect is superior to the other. each classpect serves a DIFFERENT function and has strengths and weaknesses but each individual is equally valid and worthy of respect. not so for master classes. master classes explicitly exist as THE superior classes, of the active and passive roles respectively. they represent the ULTIMATE active and ULTIMATE passive, which inherently places them outside of the classpect system. master classes can be sparingly applied to supercharged supernatural/religious figures, and maybe i’ll discuss them briefly someday, though i don’t really care for them, but i will not be discussing them as a viable option wrt real people and to most fictional characters.

- no gendered classes. sorry if you missed the memo but gender is fakey fake. and “gendered classes” are bullshit. the only real effect of gendered classes is that certain classes are often associated with characters of a certain gender, abs that’s usually due to Sexism and Gender Roles, blech. generally the goal is to weed out gender stereotypes from characterisation when trying to use any of these examples as representative of their class.

will probably add more later as i think of things. anyway onto classes and aspects. :’)

[travelingprincess]

Marriage in the Time of Liberalism

Some time ago, we had a post asking what was stopping Muslim women from getting married. In the course of that thread, I was kindly asked to expound on some of what I stated regarding the differences in how marriage is perceived when one is younger vs. older and more mature. This post is the response to that request, inshallah.

Disclaimer: As always, I must state plainly and clearly that I am not a person of knowledge or someone fit to take knowledge from. What's presented here is simply my own opinion; any religious rulings or opinions are cited but if you see something which isn't, kindly inform me immediately so I can locate the source and add it or remove that point altogether.

I'd also like to apologize upfront if the post rambles a bit too much. This is a topic which can be hard to describe, and harder to understand, without actually being older and looking back on the past in hindsight. For the young, it's easy to take umbrage or have the knee-jerk reaction of, "yea, okay, but that's not the case with me." Most of the time, it is, though. Even for those of us that were relatively mature at a younger age. That's just life.

The Fairytale Doesn't Exist

One of the biggest issues with being raised in a non-Muslim country is the way the ideology seeps into you, even without trying. Even when you're actively fighting against it. It gets to you, because it is the norm everywhere; you're surrounded by it and you see what appears to be "success" from it all around you.

As far as the discussion on marriage, the biggest issue is the way it's romanticized in the West. Well, these days it might even be more accurate to say that haram relationships are romanticized more than marriage, aouthubillah.

There is this idea that there is one, single, perfect soulmate out there just for you, and once you find him, you'll have found marital bliss. They'll complete you, your sentences, and your sandwiches.

The man will be attentive and emotionally intelligent enough to know when you're upset. He'll drop whatever he's doing to coddle you until you open up to him about what's bothering you, which he will resolve by knowing, intuitively, exactly the kind of approach you're looking for at that exact moment. If he's rich, he'll shower you with expensive gifts and trips to exotic locations. If he's poor, he'll give you smaller gifts and make thoughtful gestures to show he was listening that time you casually mentioned in passing that you didn't like violets and roses in the same bouquet. He'll do 50% of the household chores, and take on your half whenever you've had a rough day without complaint. He'll massage your shoulders and make dinner three days out of the week. He'll celebrate when you're promoted at work and won't even care that you make more than he does now (but he'll still provide for you and your needs, alhamdulillah). He'll be a great father and take the kids out for fun and educational time at the park, museums, or play groups. He'll love to do it, you won't even have to ask. You'll be number one in his life and no one, not even his parents, will ever interfere with your marriage or gain a hold over his heart stronger than yours. You've arrived.

In reality, this doesn't exist. The last paragraph may have even sounded funny because it's a (very little) bit over the top. The sad reality is that many women suffer through these presuppositions even when they know they're unrealistic. Apart from all the romcom-esque personality tropes, it's important to understand that this man, this Ideal Husband^TM isn't one single being out there who's waiting for you. And he wasn't born like that.

There's no doubt that the Qadr of Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَتَعَالَى) (the Divine Decree) is written for each individual, but it's not necessarily based on some romantic idea of you being "the perfect match" with some special and unique individual who complements you in every way.

Priorities: Then & Now

The poison of the fairytale directly leads to what we see of skewed, un-Islamic, and frankly embarrassing priorities among young Muslims looking to marry in the modern age.

In following the kuffar into the lizard hole, Muslimahs today require that potential suitors:

understand their "love language"

have a similar sense of humor

like the same movies they do

get along with all their friends

provide a lifestyle that matches their friends' on social media

will tRaVeL with them

will do everything 50/50

will have a compatible MBTI personality reading

and on, and on, and on.

This truncated list is without even going into the nitty gritty of extravagant mahrs, lavish weddings that require riba-based loans, family drama (racism, tribalism, classism) and so on.

This is not the way of marriage in Islam.

If we look at how the people married during the time of the Prophet (ﷺ) we find that they looked for the essential characteristics:

good religion

good manners / character

the ability to fulfill the needs of the contract (support a wife and family, even if just modestly, able to perform sexually, able to run a household and/or manage the realities of a given suitor's situation)

fulfill attraction minimums required by each party

agree on a mahr.

If the general conditions listed above were fulfilled, the marriage was done and life moved on. This is because the Sahaba (radhiAllahu anhuma), the Salaf, and those who followed them in good were keenly aware of one critically important detail: the life of this world is temporary and the ultimate success is the Hereafter.

How many ayat1 and ahadith2 do we have speaking to the above? Yet we find that young Muslims today are extremely comfortable considering someone who "tries to pray most prayers," even considering them to be "religious" because they are looking at their benefit, comfort, lifestyle, etc. through the lens of this world only. What a short-sighted bargain that is. Subhanallah.

The reality is that if you're a good, pious Muslim who is striving to please Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَتَعَالَى), most members of the opposite gender who are striving to do the same will be relatively compatible. That is to say, both of you are facing the same direction, striving for the same goal, which reduces a lot of the friction points. Of course nuances exist which are totally valid, including personalities, individual situations and circumstances, etc. but getting into the minutiae is neither beneficial nor realistic. I'm talking here in a general, overarching basis.

I also want to mention that it is important to acknowledge, accept and work within the understanding that the male is not like the female. Their needs, thought processes, thresholds and response patterns are not like ours. And while the modern woman is hell-bent on feminizing her male partner, good Muslim men are neither looking to be feminized nor seeking to marry women who strive to be men.

Students of Knowledge

Because of the nature of our sub, I think this note is important to bring on the topic: many practicing Muslim sisters also romanticize the idea of marrying a student of knowledge. Don't do that, ladies.

This route is not for everybody and not enough of us understand what it really means to play second fiddle to 'ilm. Yes, it's a noble calling but it requires a lot from these men, which means they have less to give of themselves and worldliness to their wives. This means less time, perhaps less resources/money, less attention, etc. Not only does their seeking of knowledge make demands of them, but so do the community at large. Lectures, khutbahs, questions—everyone thinks their problem needs to be solved yesterday. After all that, a man doesn't want to come home and start teaching his wife, also. He has the same needs as other men; practicing women would do well to remember that not put these individuals on pedestals.

Several students of knowledge have made mention of this issue on YouTube, as well, including Abu Ibraheem Hussnayn, Imran ibn Mansur (Dawahman), and Abu Taymiyyah (just off the top of my head).

Not Your Other Half

In closing, and in returning to the matter at hand, I find that the older you get, the more you realize it's not on a partner to make you whole. Your relationship with yourself and with Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَتَعَالَى) should be solid regardless of your spouse. They will not fill in all your deficiencies in deen and dunya, that is still on you. Those deficiencies will still be there even after you marry the best person for you. It's on you to take the initiative and improve yourself.

Too many times, younger people can be incredibly emotionally immature. They may even be too immature to be honest with themselves, how will they handle another person / family / life change? It's actually a little alarming what you'll read on some of the marriage forums online or hear among young people casually discussing the topic.

Much of this can be resolved through developing your relationship with your religion and working on self improvement / self actualization in the Islamic context—understanding more about your responsibilities towards a spouse than their rights towards yourself. It's a shame that many of us put off this vital work until our later years.

Footnotes

1. From Surah Al-A'la:

"He has certainly succeeded who purifies himself And mentions the name of his Lord and prays. But you prefer the worldly life, While the Hereafter is better and more enduring."

—Qur'an 87:14-17

2. Abu Huraira reported:

The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ),said, “The world is a prison for the believer and a paradise for the unbeliever.”

—Sahih Muslim 2956

[oddsnendsfanfics]

Two Strangers : Movies & Marriage

Genre: Fan Fiction (Vikings) Pairing: Ivar/Reader Warnings: N/A Rating: G Length: Drabble Disclaimer: a strict work of fiction, I own nothing except the original characters and the plot line. In no way am I affiliated to any of it.  

A/N: Yes, once again we get to play with some cute, fluffy, adorable Modern!Ivar. 

Two Strangers Master List

The heavy groan that rose from Ivar was impressive and startling, as he managed to somehow flop down on your couch. Leaning his head back onto the soft material, he closed his eyes and rubbed his stomach, a satisfied grin crossing his handsome face.

"That was amazing," He complimented, with another pat of his tummy. "I haven't ate like that since," Ivar paused trying to remember a meal that good, ever. "Well, I'm sure it was probably Helga who cooked it."

You nod in understanding, pulling off your socks and sinking down on the couch beside him. Ivar's boss was married to one of the best cooks that you'd ever met. Giving his tummy a final, dramatic pat, Ivar sighed in content.

"I shouldn't have had the third piece of pie, though. But how could I say no? Your mom may be a better cook than Helga."

"Not possible, but not impossible." You smile at the praise.

Resting his hand on your knee, Ivar turns his head to look at you, his eyes bright despite the jet lagged bags forming under them. "I had a good time, thank you gorgeous."

Any and all doubts Ivar previously had about your family were gone and squashed, after dinner. They had been kind, accepting, and genuine people. Ivar was another guest, in no way different – other than he was your boyfriend. Your mother had gushed over him, making sure he was at home while she kept filling his plate. Your father had been happy to sit and talk sports, cigars, and whatever else they had discussed in the living room when you weren't in ear shot.

"My parents love you," You gently slide your hand into his. "You do know that?"

"They're nice people, I should have just listened when you told me not to worry, but there is always that anxiety meeting the parents." Ivar winked. Shifting around to get comfortable, he furrowed his brow with a sudden thought. "If it isn't too much trouble, I want to return the favour."

"You mean we make them dinner?" If that was the idea, it was a great one. Your parents would be thrilled that Ivar wanted to spend more time with them.

"We can make them dinner, take them to dinner, I don't care. Whatever you think is best." Ivar didn't know your parents well enough to know which option would be more their style, which is why he would leave that detail to you and pick up once the choice was made.

"Mom has Wednesdays off, we can make dinner and have them here. They're going to love it." You lean over, kissing his cheek, wiping your lipstick away after the act.

"Good," Ivar continued excitedly, sitting up straighter. "I'm cooking. Point me to where everything is, then get out of my way." He laughed in a childish manner.

"Ivar, babe," You draw out the words, rolling your eyes. "You're my guest, you don't need to cook. Let me treat you."

"No way," Ivar gave a quick head shake, his dark hair swishing with the sudden jolt. "It's my treat, I insist. And next week," He leaned over giving you a soft kiss for emphasis, "will be 10 months since we've met. I'm taking you to dinner that night."

Ten whole months! It was crazy to think that ten months ago, you'd walked onto that plane and had Ivar sit next to you. Ten whole months wrapped up in this beautiful human being, literally and figuratively. Time really did fly when you were having fun.

Since Ivar was visiting, you had agreed to celebrate the ten month mark, not knowing if you'd be able to be together on the actual one year mark. An anniversary celebrated two months early was better than a FaceTime date on the actual day, not that the video chat date would be passed by, either way.

"You're too sweet," You whisper, leaning back into Ivar, your lips brushing his. Tugging at his bottom lip, fingers running through his soft hair, you feel the butterflies again. They had impeccable timing, soaring in whenever you and Ivar got too close.

His signature sandalwood and citrus scent was enough to hit you like a truck, lost in the feeling of his fingers running up under your shirt, you nipped at his neck and adam's apple. Eyes closed, Ivar leaned his head back, your body against his was one of the greatest feelings he'd ever experienced. Your lips felt smooth and your hands pulled his hair just the right way, but...Ivar mentally paused.

Opening his eyes, Ivar licked his lips, his hands stopping their climb under your shirt, and his brow creasing with a scowl to follow.

"I'm sorry," Ivar spoke, the rigidness of his tone causing you to stop.

Leaning back, you gently run your fingers across the back of his head, a concern growing within you. "Are you okay, Ivar?"

"Oh, I'm more than okay," Ivar laughed nervously, glancing down he grimaced. "I just...right now...it may not be the best time for that. I uh, I've had a big day and..."

"Say no more." You place another innocent kiss on his cheek. "We don't have to."

"I want to." Ivar clarified, feeling frustrated with himself. He desperately wanted to, but what good was he if his entire body wasn't willing to cooperate. "Oh fuck, I want to." His eyes were wide and lustful. "I'm sorry."

"Ivar, you have nothing to be sorry for." You assure him, gently massaging his scalp. "I get it, today was a busy day. You're probably tired and that is perfectly fine." You search for a quick topic search, if you dwell on this for too long then Ivar will only start to beat himself up, if he hasn't already. This isn't the first time for this to happen. "What do you say, we get into something comfortable and watch some movies?"

"What did I do to deserve you?" Ivar smiles softly, thankful that you didn't press the subject and went along with it, no hurt feelings.

"Now you're trying to be cute," You tease him, nudging him in the arm.

"No, I'm being honest." Ivar replied with a little push to his voice. "I'm serious, some days I think about us and I don't get it. But I'm glad."

Why you would want to hang out with him, to have a relationship with him, baffled Ivar at least once a day. You could be out, enjoying life and being with anyone, but you had chose him. For whatever reason, the universe had given you to him.

Maybe his father had always been right, to think the world gives you the best of things, when you need them most? Maybe that is why he had you? Ivar wouldn't say he was a religious man, but maybe this was his parents way of making up for all the things they couldn't give Ivar when they were with him?

"Love isn't supposed to make sense, Ivar."

"No, I suppose not." Ivar agrees, taking the chance to remind you just how much he loves you. Hearing the words always causes a deep blush to creep up your neck and into your cheeks.

"I love you, too." You enjoy reminding him, just as much. "You're hard not to love, Ivar Lothbrok." You wink.

"And it isn't just me," Ivar is wide eyed. "My brothers are crazy about you, I swear. I think Ubbe and Torvi may be planning our wedding, but I have no proof." He joked.

"Ugh," You roll your eyes dramatically. Ivar feels his body go stiff with the action, fear creeping through him. Had he said the wrong thing? "Would we really want Ubbe planning a wedding?" Your question eases Ivar's fear.

Ubbe Lothbrok was not the first name to mind, when you thought of a wedding planner. Truthfully, none of the Lothbrok Brothers seemed like they would be much good at organizing and planning a wedding. It would surely turn into a mess of chaos, arguments, and somebody getting punched. Torvi on the other hand, you could very easily imagine asking her for some help – after all she'd done it before, and unlike your mother or friends she would have no issues giving you the brutal truth about things.

"Not unless we've got our hearts set on a pub and some fried food for a reception." Ivar snickers.

"Then Hvitserk should hire him, if he ever decides to settle down." The middle Lothbrok brother had two loves, fried food and women, if he could combine the two then there was no doubt Hvitserk would be all over that.

It's Ivar's turn to roll his eyes, the idea of Hvitserk ever settling for one woman was laughable. His older brother would have to stop thinking with his dick long enough to do that. "Hvitserk will settle down, when I can walk on my own and pigs fly."

"Has he ever had a serious girlfriend?"

"Nope," Ivar blushed a little. "None of us have, aside from Bjorn. He's had two, married them both. I guess the rest of us aren't as romantic. Or foolish." Ivar smirked. Gingerly running his finger tips over the top of your thigh, he adds. "Some of us never expected to find someone to actually love us."

"Mmm, well Sigurd can be hard on the head," You refuse to let Ivar turn this into some sort of self loathing conversation.

"Which is why you want to pawn him off on your best friend?" Ivar giggled, remembering a conversation previous. "Makes sense, although I think it is a good idea. He needs someone nice. And this time, I won't sleep with her."

"You, Ivar Lothbrok, are a terrible man." You can't bother to contain the laughter, as you fake disgust. "Although, I do admire your idea of revenge."

"He had it coming," Ivar feigned innocent. "Taught him not to insult me like that, ever again."

"What am I going to do with you?" You asked with a tsk.

You could marry him.

No, Ivar mentally kicked himself. Too far.

Despite the joke about planning weddings, this wasn't the time to ask. One day, though, Ivar would find the nerve and ask you. Thinking about it at any great length would cause his nerves to rise and his breath to grow short. He knew this from experience, after having a similar thought one evening while laying on the couch watching tv. He'd began to mildly panic and had sent Ubbe into full on dad mode.

Not wanting to tell his big brother what had cause it, Ivar had assured Ubbe that he was fine and had only grown nervous over an upcoming routine doctor's appointment. If thinking about asking caused such a reaction, Ivar could only imagine how asking would go.

"I have some ideas," Ivar's best resort was to play devious. "But what if we worry about that later?"

"I've got my eye on you," You locked eyes pretending to stare him down, breaking out in another uncontrollable grin.

"Enjoy the view, then gorgeous." Ivar gently smacks his hand down on your knee, "Now, what does a guy have to do around here, to get a girl into his tshirt, and cuddled in front of a good movie?"

Groaning, you sighed and dramatically fling your legs onto the floor. "If I have to move, then I will. You pick the movie and I'll go grab some blankets?"

"Sure," Ivar straightened up, thanking you for handing him his crutches, he carefully and cautiously stood up. "Oh and we're going to need snacks!"

"Where do you put it?" You wonder out loud, looking him up and down.

"I'm related to Hvitserk, do you need to ask? Oh hey! Do you think your mom would bring us some left over pie?" He teases, his tongue held between his teeth, gently nudging you with the end of his crutch.

@pathybo , @imgoldielikehawn , @sparklemichele , @titty-teetee , @kirah32 , @kduran04 , @capitanostella , @badassbaker ,  @pagan-raider , @cute-freak27 , @bloodyivar , @normanallthewayforever  , @blackcoffeeandgreenteaforme , @imyourliquor-youremypoison , @nikky-the-writer  , @seremedyxiii , @rrwilson66 , @alex-ivar-minx , @deleteidentity  , @hoeghfabulous , @ateliefloresdaprimavera  , @mydarlingwhim , @tornupandbored

[aquarad-a]

Tempest’s Really Cool Magical/Mystical Powers

hey what’s up it’s ya girl, here to rant obsessively about a new atlantean topic: magic!!! mostly about garth’s magic (and his other abilities) but with some general aqua-magic as well in order to set the scene!!

so let’s begin with a disclaimer  that I’m speaking almost entirely about pre-boot canon here. Because I am way more familiar with that canon, it has way more material to work with, and a lot of that material explains the magic. I will probably add to this post once we have learned more about reboot magic, but at the moment I have no idea how much of the original canon the dc writers are using in rebirth. Overall, it doesn’t seem to be similar to the older stuff.

In regards to Tempest’s powers, those will all be only in regards to preboot. His current backstory has gone through some major changes and, as you’ll read later on, this significantly affects his abilities.

another disclaimer: I probably didn’t proofread a lot of this/was drinking at times so I probably forgot stuff and will add things later.

so...an overview:

magic exists. this is an established fact. Atlantis makes use of technology and magic for their defenses. But Atlantis actually relies mostly on science than magic, unless the threat against them is also magical in nature. There are also religious groups -- Religion and magic, however, are not necessarily related concepts to Atlanteans. It’s important to note that magic users in Atlantis aren’t all that common.

Magic is hereditary, but it's not guaranteed

According to Tempest #3, the reason Garth is magical is because his “magic energies of his sorcerous ancestors” mixes directly with his genetic makeup. Unlike his forebearers, this means Garth is born with the ability to “manifest” some of his magical abilities. His abilities beyond “normal Atlantean abilities” (eg: underwater breathing, enhanced vision/hearing, etc) are caused by his genetic makeup.

Why is this interesting? Because essentially Garth hit the genetic lottery and managed to unlock some magical/mystical abilities before unlocking his birthright. This is weird. Nobody else in his family could do this.

Garth comes from a line of sorcerers-- both his father and uncle can use magic, and use it well. Atlan states that the abilities are already in Garth, however he cannot access all his powers without completing his training as well as performing a special ritual.

Additionally, his powers did not manifest until he was grown (as established by "Oceanus" in Brave and the Bold #10) which implies that the training had to come at a certain time to “unlock” those powers, even if he was “born with them.”

So this isn't like Harry Potter, where without Atlan's help Garth could have made glass disappear on Shamu's tank all willy-nilly. It takes a deliberate attempt to be trained in the art of magic at a specific age (it's unclear if it's always 18 years of age as it was with Garth) in order to gain magical abilities. Garth showed absolutely no signs of being magic when Atlan rescued him and whisked him away to train.

Had Garth not completed his birthright, he would not have been able to unlock all his magical abilities (I’ll talk more about those in a bit) This is an established canon fact. So while he had the potential, Garth may not have developed any control over his “natural” powers or even developed them at all!

This is also why everyone was so put off by Garth’s eyes -- it implied he had the potential to be a great sorcerer (and...other stuff. we’ll get to that in a bit) which is why the Idylists spread rumors that babies born with purple eyes were genetically inferior and should be put to death. Because Atlantis loves killing babies, they were all on board.

Additionally, this might explain why Arthur does not/cannot use magic-- assuming he does possess the potential for magical abilities (also assuming Atlan is his father-- obviously in other canons he is only Atlantean/Human and therefore nothing suggests he would be magical) then he may have missed the training threshold and lost his potential powers. He does gain a magical hand later on, but it was given to him by another magical entity and therefore doesn’t count in for this discussion.

The Idlyists had a magical king, but the kingdom of Atlantis has never claimed that their royalty can use magic. So royal blood is not an indication of magical abilities.

Back to training...there was an secretive Atlantean school city B’Miria (destroyed in the Black Baptism storyline) and its location was nowhere near Atlantis. B’Miria was the home of many powerful magic users, but it also appears tht their families live in the city as well. Yet another piece of evidence supporting the idea that you must start your training at a specific time in order to gain powers. Plus, almost every magic user seems to be an adult...it is possible that most magic users begin training upon reaching adulthood.

B’Miria was destroyed as were all its inhabitants. However, Garth is visited by every magical spirit who ever lived in the magical city so they could pass on their wisdom and knowledge to him and it could live on.

Now birthright rituals are probably all different. Garth’s birthright involved him stabbing himself in the heart, but that was only added because his people thought nobody would actually fucking do that (they were pacifists, so violence was not in their nature...unfortunately they didn’t take Garth’s self loathing and willingness to stab himself into account here) Presumably most others aren’t as intense and they just involve spells and reciting readings off scrolls and such. No idea. We literally only ever see Garth’s.

Some magic is based on spells, some on “energies” and others aren’t as clearly defined. But powers are defined by your genetic makeup -- someone not related to Garth or his ancestral line couldn’t shoot energy blasts for their eyes, for example.

Just because an Atlantean has unique abilities, does not mean those abilities are magical.

So this is where it’s a little weird, because there are characters who have abilities that are out of the norm, but don’t have magical origins. Again, it’s been established that magic is based on bloodlines and being lucky in your roll of the genetics dice.

Mera is not a magic user. The ability to manipulate water the way Mera and others from Xebel (Dimension Aqua for us die-hard Silver Age fans) do is actually an incredibly common ability in that dimension. Mera happens to be way more powerful than most people in Xebel, but because everyone there can do it, it’s not considered magic. You could call it hydokinisis.

Hard water constructs made by someone with connections to Xebel would not be considered magical powers. This is why Aquababy/Arthur Jr. can use hard water, but he possessed no magical abilities as far as we know.

This is also why Jackson Hyde can use hard water. He, too, possesses no magical abilities, but was given the powers of hard water.

Koryak does have the ability to control water, but has no connection to Xebel. This would be an example of water manipulation that is potentially magical. It may also be due to a really lucky genetic lottery like Garth, since he has the magical ancestry of Atlan.

Garth does not have the ability to use hard water, but he can manipulate water due to psychic powers he possesses. More on that later.

Telepathy is another ability that some Atlanteans possess that is not magical. Only certain characters display the ability and they are not connected by bloodlines or familial relation. Their telepathy also varies in power without explanation. It is most likely a dormant trait that expresses itself in some rare cases.

Aquaman has the most powerful telepathy. He is able to command sea life and even cause seizures with telepathy.

Garth has similar telepathy, but is nowhere near as powerful when he’s Aqualad. He also loses his abilities briefly (due to a mental block/mental illness) and is able to communicate with sea life but cannot command them. This does change later, but due to an increase in his mental abilities later on.

Tula has what is described as "limited telepathic abilities" and seems to be he only telepath with no royal blood which would eliminate the theory of telepathy being a royal trait (Tula was adopted by a royal family before Arthur took the throne, but has no royal blood)

Mera seems to also have a limited ability to communicate with sea life. As Mera is from Xebel (and generally considered an alternate dimension and not Atlantean) I don’t want to make any assumptions on her abilities in this case.

Additionally, neither Garth's nor Arthur's parents are shown to have telepathy. Again, proof against a "royal telepathy" theory. It's honestly probably just an ability that some Atlanteans are lucky enough to possess.

Garth && his really neat powers

Garth is an incredibly powerful wizard. He is often described as having incredibly potential, so everything he is shown doing in canon is implied to be only part of what he is truly capable of. He is also considered the most powerful sorcerer in Atlantis (and imo is one of the strongest magic users in the entire dc universe) In fact, Garth is said to be more powerful than his ancestors in terms of magic due to his powerful genetic makeup and the power of his ancestors. Basically he got a super lucky break. Although he had the potential for greatness, the reason he became so skilled as due to training. His mentor was Atlan, the Wanderer.

His training with Atlan lasted an undetermined amount of time in an alternate dimension where time passes differently -- Garth returns to his home dimension having aged years without more than a few minutes going by. We know it took several months for him to master is optic blasts alone (Tempest #1, 1996)

His training began shortly before Garth turned 18 -- we know this because it takes Slizzath 18 years to return to his home dimension, and Slizzath was killed when Berra, Garth’s mother, was with child. Since it’s later implied that Atlan has been monitoring Garth throughout his life, it’s safe to say Atlan picked the opportune moment to start training Garth. More evidence for powers manifesting only at certain ages.

Now, Garth had to perform a magical ritual in order to fulfill his birthright and receive the “energies of his ancestral energy pool” (Tempest #2) It involved plunging a dagger into his (pure) heart. This also happened to free his evil uncle, Slizzath who stole Garth’s powers. Garth had to defeat his uncle in order to rightfully gain access to all his abilities.

It should be noted that Garth is so much stronger than any of his ancestors. He literally just got lucky and became the most powerful Atlantean. Go figure.

All of these power descriptions are based on Tempest #3 and #4

What’s interesting is Tempest’s magical powers are specifically defined as non-Atlantean. Contextually, it means these are powers other Atlanteans do no possess (the issue before featured his “Atlantean powers” thus the distinction)

However, we know the following abilities were unlocked before claiming his birthright. As I said before, these are just his “you’re really fucking lucky” powers that he got before doing the ritual.

Optic Beams, which are powerful enough to stun something the size of about a grey whale (50 feet, 36 tons) or kill an average human. He can, however, adjust how powerful the blasts are. They are approximately one inch wide at the source, and can span up to 4 feet wide. Their max range is 320 feet. He cannot control the width (yikes!) and he cannot change their path (meaning they literally only go in a straight line, and only move if he moves his head)

Spells. Tempest claims that an invisibility spell was one of the first things Atlan taught him. He also claims to be able to turn people into other objects/animals, and can perform spells found in spell books. He can also “will things” to happen, as shown with his creation of his costume. It was a magical event that Garth didn’t actually seem to consciously attempt to do.

Abilities that came after he claimed his birthright fall into several categories:

Water Control:

Current Manipulation: Garth’s power over water is based on psionic (psychic) abilities. He can create and manipulate three different types of currents: drifts (slow moving and broad); streams (quick and narrow); and upwelling (bringing cold water from the bottom of the ocean upward). He can change the direction and temperature of currents, which also can affect the weather/create rough seas. He can also ride the currents, which allows him to move faster than he would be able to on his own (and why he’s faster than any Atlantean ships) or send objects along the currents.

Whirlpools: Tempest can essentially force two tides or currents together to create whirlpool that can reach about 12 feet wide. He can also create rapidly-moving funnels of water for various purposes. The example given in Tempest #2 is a battering ram.

Heat Generation via his left hand. This is also a psionic power, but it’s why his left hand is usually draw glowing yellow/orange. He can heat bodies or water or areas with a lot of moisture present. He can boil water approximately 5ftx9ft in area (and 12 ft below sea level) to about 320°F. His range is about 60 feet on this one...anything farther away and he doesn’t have much affect.

Cold Generation via his right hand. Same as his heat powers as they are psionic, but Garth is better at using cold than heat. He basically can remove heat from water until it freezes. He can create shapes such as spikes or walls and has way more control over his ice creations. His “signature creation” is an ice prison made of bars that can hold an average Atlantean captive. Again, his range is about 60 feet on this power. Basically Garth was the original Elsa, complete with anxiety issue and depression!!

Mystical Powers:

Mythical Detection of changes in the mythical fields around him. Garth can sense other magical uses, other magical events happening, or events that are going to happen. Sort of a “sixth sense” that he doesn’t have direct control over.

Occultism - this is referring more to Garth knowing the inner workings of secretive societies/cultures. Specifically, Atlantean magic (especially the information gained from B’Miria) and the knowledge of Atlan the Wanderer.

Postcognition. You know, the opposite of precognition. Garth is able to “see”/sense magical entities or even spells that have been cast nearby up to seven hours prior. This is useful in finding ways to reverse or counteract spells, or to track other magic users.

Telepathy. Talked a little about this before, but specifically after he completes his birthright Garth’s telepathy gets a huge power surge. He can use interpersonal as well as broadcast telepathy. They’re not technically considered magical, but maybe mystical? It’s still unclear why some Atlanteans can do this at all.

Telekinesis. His powers in this respect are limited, but Garth has been shown to be able to use his mind to draw poison out of somebody’s bloodstream and through their pores. So, like, that’s pretty badass.

Astral Projection. Super badass imo. Garth is able to not only astral project himself but can do it to others as well. Basically transferring consciousness to another body or form. Garth does this to himself and Arthur and then they swim through Arthur’s water hand. Super underused power imo.

Dimensional Travel/Portal Generation. Basically Garth can create or maintain portals to different dimensions. He can move himself through these portals, or move other people (or objects. like.........Atlantis, for example) They are incredibly difficult to keep open for long periods of time, especially if Garth himself didn’t create the portal. Tends to be a “if you ask me to do this thing, don’t ask me to do anything else for a while” type of power.

Demonic Summoning: For all your demonic summoning needs. Presumably needs a summoning spell. I guess in theory Garth knows how to do necromancy because his uncle learned that and Garth learned all his family secrets. But using necromancy turns you into a gross demon thingy and it’s Bad so Garth wouldn’t do that. He might summon a demon tho. That’s different.

Other Spells In theory, Garth should be able to perform nearly any spell given to him, and create his own. He does this several times (sometimes better than others) and obviously prefers more structured spell casting.

Communication with the “spiritual essence” of the planet itself -- the energies of all the seas, oceans, rivers, any body of water. As well as the protector of those energies, the Naiad.

AND MORE! We know Garth continues training even after Atlan, and he has access to spell books from all over. Even the writers acknowledge that the powers he possesses are just a sampling of what he is truly capable of.

Thanks for reading through (or skimming!) and I’m always open to discussions if you have any questions or feel I’ve missed anything!!

And again, this is only discussing pre-boot. Because Garth has a completely different backstory in rebirth, I have no idea if he can use any of those powers, or how powerful he can become. @ dc comics give garth his curly hair and his origin story back you fucking COWARDS.

[skam-season4]

SKAM Theories, Speculation, and Analysis of what we know so far - Season 4 Hiatus

Hi all, It’s Holly, your least favorite SKAM blog again. I am putting together a master post of speculation, theories, and other stuff because this hiatus is killing me. You’d think after 112 days of absolutely zero content would prepare me for ten days, but here I am. So, this will kind of be chronological, and kind of in order of small details to big picture stuff. Because It’s semi - chronological, most of the beginning sections will be Even and Balloon Squad stuff, and  Feel free to message me on your thoughts, I encourage you all to disagree, have your own opinions, but just do it respectfully.

This should be pretty obvious, but if you aren’t caught up with S4E5 yet, this will be spoilers galore.

Bolded things are summaries of a topic, or main / important ideas of a topic

Disclaimer: I am not an expert on anything bipolar / mental illness related, or anything related to Islam. I’ve pulled an Isak and googled different types of bipolar, I know a few people who are mentally ill, but its different for everyone. I’ve read a little bit of the Qur’an, and I’ve tried to educate myself of some Islamic traditions and rituals, but I definitely do not know everything. If I say something wrong or ignorant, PLEASE CORRECT ME, but do it respectfully and I will gladly change it.

Here is the list of topics in order that will be covered:

Sana being ignored - a look through the ages

Even’s timeline

Even’s relationship with each member of the Balloon Squad

Hvem er Mikael?

The Even x Mikael x Yousef situation

Sonja’s Role

Even’s Christmas Text

Season 4 Trailer analysis

Sana’s feelings towards Vilde in S4

Was Yousef going to kiss Sana at the end of “The Best of Islam”?

Sana + Noorhelm drama

Yousef + not Fighting

What was the fight about?

Girls in the bathroom

Noora’s motivation to kiss Yousef

Yousef’s Motivation to kiss Noora

Season 4 Hiatus Trailer Analysis

BIGGER IDEAS

Why the Russ bus is Important

Vilde’s Character Development / Gay Vilde

Sana’s Mirror and Foil

Parallels

Themes

Perspective

Here we go!

Sana being ignored - a look through the ages 

Sana has been being ignored from the first episode she is introduced.

Vilde’s first visit to the school doctor: Where’s Sana?

The rest of the girls drinking in Eva’s room before Vilde sleeps with William: Where’s Sana?

We didn’t really think much of it when it was happening, and thats because of perspective. Perspective is possibly the most important lesson in this entire series (more on that later) and we were seeing this from Eva’s perspective. Eva probably didn’t notice too much that Sana was being left out, probably because she wasn’t that close to her yet, but now we get upset about Sana being excluded because we are actually affected by it.

Even’s timeline

This is what we have been told as of now. Some theorize that some of this info is false, and we obviously have a lot of missing information, but here’s what we think we know so far:

In Even’s second year, the video interview with him and Mikael was made. (x)

It’s 2015

Even is in his third year at Bakka

He is part of the Balloon Squad

Sonja and him have been dating for a year or two at this point

At some point, Even tries to kiss Mikael

Mikael pulls away because he is religious

Even memorizes the Qur’an in Arabic in attempt to cure himself

Even begins posting verses on Facebook about gay people going to Hell (flame emoji?)

We know this is the school’s Facebook page, as per Vilde in this text

I think its safe to assume that Even was manic when he posted that stuff

BUT we cannot be sure whether he was manic or not when he decided to read the Qur’an.

Sonja says he was in S3E8

But Sonja has also said that Even’s feelings for Isak are a result of mania, and basically that Isak was a symptom of Even’s mania

Obviously this turned out to be false

So the line between his mania and non-mania regarding what happened at Bakka is still extremely blurry. (non-mania? idk what to call it sorry, as I’ve said, I’m not an expert on bipolar, and I'm pretty sure it’s not appropriate to call it “when he was ‘normal’”, is “stable” an okay word to use? someone please educate me)

He hurt someone, and we have yet to find out who that is.

We know he hurt someone, or at least thinks he did because

Take a look at the aluminum leg story in S3E3. It seems like a harmless little joke, but it turned out to be an allegory to how he thinks Sonja views their relationship and such. So in S3E10 when he says “I’ll just hurt you, and then you’ll hate me”, this isn’t just because he thinks it will happen, it’s because it has happened before.

The obvious answer at the beginning of the season was Mikael, but now it seems to be Yousef. (I think it’s Yousef)

Even’s relationship with each member of the Balloon Squad

Mikael refers to Even as his best buddy, so we know they were close at some point, definitely before the kissing incident happened.

Elias and Even must have been close as well. This is demonstrated when Even asks Sana how “the boys” are doing, and then asks specifically about Elias. This is probably because Elias is her brother, the one she would know most about, but he doesn’t go on to ask about the rest of them individually.

Yousef and Even’s relationship seems more complicated than the others. They were close friends at some point, (battle 2015 photo, Yousef knows too much a lot about what happened between him and Mikael) Even obviously still loves all the boys, as I said in the bullet above, and Yousef seems to still love Even too, as we see in S4E4. He was so upset about what happened with Even, he gave up his religion, his beliefs. I think the reason he could have been potentially upset at Sana for having them be in the same place at the end of S4E5 was because he wasn’t ready. Not because he didn’t love Even, or was mad at Even, but because he wasn’t ready. (I think this goes without saying,but when I say love here, it is being used 100% platonic. The Balloon Squad, those boys, love each other. That much is obvious, and that’s that.)

I think Mutta and Adam are just more side characters, to add to the dynamic of the squad. They balance out the 5 Girl Squad members and the 4 (5? Is Even officially part of the Boy Squad now?) Boy Squad members, so it just kinda makes sense that there would be 5 Balloon Boys as well. They were probably Even’s buddies, but not as close to him as the other three.

Hvem er Mikael?

Ahh, here we are, the ever elusive Mikael. The Man, The Myth,The Legend. He is

Even’s “best buddy” in 2015

“I’m honest because I care about you” (x)  We’ve seen Mikael and the other boys be affectionate with each other, physically and emotionally. This seems to be just another example of this.

Even refers to him as the “previous man of my life” in this text, and as I’ve stated before, Even’s jokes always have an element of truth in them somewhere.

“He tried to kiss Mikael” - Okay, but if all of what Yousef said in that clip was true, why would Mikael be laughing at the mention of Even’s name in the SMS Roulette video?

When Yousef brought up Even in “The Best of Islam”, he was sad talking about him, obviously because one of his friends tried to kill himself.

I will explain in the “The Even x Mikael x Yousef situation: A Theory” section of this post why I think that is that they have such different reactions.

The Even x Mikael x Yousef situation: A Theory

This is a theory, not an analysis of what we already know and etc.

Sooo... here are some theories (x) (x) (x) especially the last one, etc. about Yousef (and Mikael) being gay / not straight, and I honestly don’t agree with it. As much as I would love to see a Muslim LGBT+ character in the media, it just doesn’t seem like it would be Yousef to me.

Some of the evidence pointing to the fact he might be gay is

the visual parallels between Isak and Emma making out in S3E1 and Yousef and Noora making out in S4E5 (I.E. just kissing, arms at the sides, generally disinterested) which makes sense.

Julie is looking for any opportunity to throw us off, plot twist the shit out of this season, and keep us on our toes, which is getting more and more difficult as time goes on, so we always have to keep that in mind.

 Now here’s why I think he’s not gay

If Yousef was gay, and it was actually him that was involved with the kissing situation then

 the Qur’an verses that Even posted would be directed at Yousef (and himself)

Hence the flame emoji thing in the SMS Roulette video

But Elias is the one that said that.

I highly doubt that when Even posted that stuff, he called Yousef out by name. So assuming the passages were just directed at Yousef and that’s what Elias was referencing with the flame emoji thing, that would mean Elias knows that Yousef is gay or that something happened between him and Even. Then that would mean Elias encouraged Sana to romantically pursue Yousef in Humble, while knowing he was gay, and intentionally fucking over his sister???? which is the exact opposite of everything we’ve seen with him????? It just doesn’t add up

I could see Yousef being bi or something and having a sexuality crisis in his Bakka days, because I truly believe he had feelings for Sana, and if he was bi, then that takes care of that.

I also don’t think Mikael is gay / LGBT+ because

he supposedly pushed Even away for being gay because he is religious

but he wears nail polish and kisses other boy’s hands and stuff like that

and in no way am I saying that because he does that stuff that makes him gay

But if Mikael is actually homophobic, or if he is actually gay and had internalized homophobia and issues with himself, I highly doubt in either situation he’d be too keen on doing traditionally gay things a lot

does that make sense?

I think that Yousef is the only Balloon Boy that knows Even tried to kill himself

Yousef seems to be the only one that is sad to see / hear bout Even

The others seem not affected, like Mikael in SMS Roulette, or upset / startled / angry, like Elias at the end of S4E5 etc.

Other people have pointed out that if he’s the only one that knows

Yousef must have been the one to find Even when he tried

Sonja’s Role

If I did the math right, her and Even started dating roughly around 2012, waayyy before the kissing incident with the Balloon Squad

As I talked about above somewhere, she claims Even memorized the Qur’an, “because at the time he thought it was a ‘good idea’”, and how that might not be entirely true because the line between mania and non-mania back then was so blurry

So did she know about the Mikael situation?

I feel like her role might be really important, because it was actually one of the most important roles in S3, but I don’t think we’d ever see Sana and Sonja interact, so maybe when we get the full story she will have something more to do with it.

Even’s Christmas Text

This is bolded because it’s my favorite theory I think. Who could it be? That little facial expression (timestamp: 5:09) was not in there for no reason, and like Julie said, she’s looking to throw us off.

Mikael: I don’t think it’s him. The second Mikael sees Even and Isak at the karaoke bar, he’s outta there faster than a green snake in a sugar cane field. He doesn’t seem too keen on acknowledging Even.

Sana: She might have texted him right before she walked in and told him not to worry, she wouldn’t say anything, or something along those lines. Again, possible, but not likely.

Yousef: Probable. Like I’ve said before, Yousef was probably upset to see that Sana brought him and Even together because he wasn’t ready. He seems like a very thoughtful person. After Sana asks him why he doesn’t believe in Allah, he doesn’t immediate respond. He takes a moment to gather his thoughts, and I feel like he would want to think over what he wants to say to his friend he hasn’t talked to in a year who tried to kill himself very carefully, (who wouldn’t) and what better way than a text he can write over and over again and revise it?

Sonja: Everything points to her, at least to me. After Isak texted her, maybe she felt she should say something directly to Even. This always seemed the most probable to me, but I am absolutely set on finding out what that was about, and like I said in the “Sonja’s Role” section, I don’t think we’ll see more of her. The only thing I could think of is if Even tells Sana that Sonja texted him, but I don’t see how that would be relevant to anything.

Season 4 Trailer Analysis

I’m not gonna go into what each action in the trailer means. People have already done that. But the new speculation: The Trailer Is In Reverse!!!

I’m going to refer to the original trailer as the original, and the edited one as the “forwards” one.

So, in the forwards trailer, Sana trips Noora and causes a chain reaction that ends with Even getting hurt (with a selfie stick = social media?) and Isak stays by his side.

But, in the original, it starts with Even gathering up his blood (clearing up his past?) and Isak helps him back on his feet.

It ends with Sana pulling Noora up.

In the forwards version, Sana makes a decision that causes people to get hurt, while in the original Sana fixes everything just like she’s done in all three past seasons.

Also, are the roles reversed? Even bleeds in the trailer, but Isak got punched. Sana tripped Noora but Sana got hurt when Noora kissed Yousef. So if Isak is actually Even and Sana is actually Noora, is Yousef actually Mikael (and Vilde falls for Eva?)

Sana’s Attitude Towards Vilde in S4 so far

Sana seems generally annoyed at her and is ready to snip at her

“your mom is not having a wine tasting party”

Sana won’t let her talk when they go to look at the bus

Sana tells the girls they are joining with Pepsi Max, and that they pay and she is the Bus Boss

This is Vilde’s reaction:

She looks angry

But she says “sana’s the boss, she’ll fix it. Remember when she fixed the toilet paper situation (in S1)?”

This seems innocent, but I think it’s a challenge

Like “You can fix it... can’t you?”

Vilde is waiting for Sana to screw up so she can take over.

In S2, Vilde talks about how much she likes William, after she saw Noora kissing him

She does this because she’s trying to get Noora to tell her about it and get a reaction out of her

So isn’t she trying to get a reaction out of Sana too?

She’s also trying to get a rise out of Sana by talking about her and Magnus

In S4E1, before Sana walks in they are “casually talking bout different shades of blue”. Everyone stops, says hi, to her, and the Vilde pipes up and says, “anyway Magnus and I have sex all the time blahh blah blah”

In her mind, maybe what she wants to happen is Sana snaps and does something, Vilde will tell the Girl Squad she’s psycho (I could see her being like “I knew from the beginning and you guys didn’t listen to me”) and then she will be the new buss boss

Was Yousef going to kiss Sana at the end of “The Best of Islam”?

First off, I’d like to say props to Julie Andem for creating potentially the most pure relationship in television history. If Sana and Yousef do get together, I feel it is highly unlikely for them to kiss or anything, so this would be a relationship fueled by purely emotion, trust, and communication, and not on physical things (of course there’s the physical want we’ve seen from Sana’s side, but you know what I mean). I’m pretty sure no one wants to see her compromise her beliefs and have sex with Yousef or something stupid like that (like Noora did with William)

I think that he was going to kiss her

they seemed to have an entire conversation that we, the viewers, didn’t understand entirely just by looking at each other.

Yousef does this tiny little head nod (timestamp: 14:24) and leans forward a minute amount, and then Sana starts shaking her head.

Then, at 14:30 he rolls his eyes a little, and says, “No?” like he was asking to kiss her, she said no, and then he was like “why am I such an idiot, she obviously doesn’t like me if she deleted me on Facebook” etc.

This would also explain why he would kiss Noora

Sana + Noorhelm drama

Eva was the first one to know about William’s knew

Sana was the only one who wanted to tell Noora

She wanted to tell her because she’s trying to protect her friend

Just like she told Vilde William wasn’t interested in S1

Noora thought that was mean of Sana to be honest with Vilde

But Noora thought it was mean of Sana to not tell her?

SANA WAS LITERALLY ABOUT TO TELL NOORA AND THEN NOORA STARTED TALKING OVER HER. In “heartbreak”, (timestamp: 5:28) Sana takes a breath and says, “Du-” (you) and immediately gets cut off by Noora saying “oh my god, if I think about him with anyone else I’m going to break” or whatever

Maybe Noora will realize this and apologize to Sana right away and it will set up Noora being on Sana’s side when she finds out about Sana being kicked off the bus?

But maybe I’m just being optimistic

Yousef and Not Fighting

I feel like the reason he stayed behind was because he didn’t want to choose sides. If we’re sticking with the theory that he knew about about Even’s suicide attempt, but the others didn’t, then this makes sense. He didn’t want to choose sides. He wouldn’t want to go out there and fight with the Balloon Squad because he obviously still cares about Even and wouldn’t want to fight his friends. But he wouldn’t want to fight with the Boy Squad because then he’d have to explain why he stood up for Even to the Balloon boys, and tell them about the suicide attempt.

What was the fight about?

My original theory: before the clip came out, I saw the BTS pics and thought maybe Magnus finds out about the SMS roulette Nudes 4 Nudes thing and dukes it out when he sees Elias. This is probably not true now that we’ve seen the clip.

Obvious theory: Mikael or Mutta, the only two outside with the Boy Squad, started a fight because they didn’t like seeing Even in a homosexual relationship. Obvious. Too obvious. Especially because the girls in the bathroom think that's why it happened.

Other: Isak threw the first punch. As we see him walking away, we see him shaking his hand. Maybe because he was shaking off blood, maybe because he was shaking off pain?

Girls in the bathroom

Like I just said, Because they think that the fight was about Muslims Vs. Gays™ this is probably not true.

Sana can’t win. According to the girls, she’s too Muslim to be on the bus and be a good bus boss... but she’s not Muslim enough to be a good representation of Islam... like... what? That conversation upset me so much.

Did Vilde snake? Or is that just false rumors? I don’t think Noora knows, or Chris, but did Eva know that they were going to throw her off the bus? She looks uncomfortable when Sana and Noora approach them and the Pepsi Max girls. Assuming they didn’t know, will they stand by her? Will they take Pepsi Max’s side?

Noora’s motivation to kiss Yousef

1. Noora did not know about Sana’s feelings for Yousef. She had already expressed interest in him, and was lonely and upset and saw him and kissed him.

2. Noora did know about Sana’s feelings for Yousef, and she was upset at Sana and wanted to get back at her. Some think that Noora expressing interest in Yousef was actually her subtly asking about Sana’s feelings for him. This seems ooc to me, but who knows?

Yousef’s Motivation to kiss Noora

This is more complicated.

Perspective: He didn’t actually like Sana, and since we’re seeing things through her eyes, she made it up in her head. He is affectionate with his friends, so he would be affectionate towards her too. (This kinda makes sense, but my Yousana shipping heart refuses to believe it)

Mama Bakkoush told him to stay away. This seems like a possibility, like after she knows 100% that there is nothing to worry about, and then she texts Sana and is like “I trust you” etc. I just feel like every time we see a kid with a religious family, the parents are always portrayed as overbearing and suffocating, and I feel like Julie is gonna give us a new look at a religious poc mom that is actually a great mom, like most of what we’ve seen of her.

The most likely thing to me seems like he liked her, and then was upset because he opened up to her in S4E4, and then she put the Balloon Boys and Evak intentionally in the same place without warning him. Or Noora told him what Sana said about him being immature etc.

Season 4 Hiatus Trailer Analysis

Who is eating the carrot?

Assuming it’s Noora, the carrot represents Yousana. She destroys it.

Assuming it’s Sana, the carrot represents her feelings. Instead of “pulling it closer”, like Yousef suggests, she “pushes it away and looses control over it.” Her feelings eat her up, and she’s stuffing all her feelings inside.

It is Isak’s black eye, someone did a side by side comparison proving it’s him.

Whose hair and whose hand?

Yousef running his hands through his hair?

Mikael running his hands through his hair?

Even running his hands through Mikael’s hair? (Pls no Julie)

It looks like a male hand, so not Noora and Yousef.

I think it’s Yousef. look at how he does it in “feel it coming”

Sara’s Mouth.

She’s smiling... dos this mean she gets what she wants and Sana is actually thrown off the bus?

BIGGER IDEAS

Why the Russ bus is Important

It’s a symbol. Y’all are complaining that it’s getting too much screen time for something we won’t even get to see, but first of all, It’s what brought the girls together in the first place. But it’s also a symbol to Sana. It’s a symbol of her Norwegian identity. 

Vilde’s Character Development / Gay Vilde

Very few side characters have gone through development. It’s mainly only been

William through the second season.

We’ve also heard of Even’s development; he hated himself for wanting to kiss boys and now he’s comfortable with himself. We didn’t actually see that though, we only know him after he’s comfortable with himself.

One could make the argue Jonas had a little development, from Jonas “you only know gay songs” Noah Vasquez in S1 to Jonas “what’s up with you dissing gay people”  “he needs to break up with his girlfriend”  “straight up” Noah Vasquez in S3.

Vilde is the most complex non-main character we’ve ever had, but is there even time for a redemption arc?

When I first saw the gay Vilde theory, I thought it was just people on Tumblr doing their thing and head cannoning her as gay with only 1 questionable scene as evidence but upon further inspection....

The thing that sticks out to me most is the scene in S1 when Vilde is trying to get turned on when thinking about William, she says “nothing makesme horny”. Then in S2 when are the girls are sitting on the windowsil, Noora is texting so it’s only in some versions of the subtitles, but Vilde’s back at it again talking about Noora being a lesbian. And Vilde says “I’ve made out with Eva. The feelings that arise when you make out with a girl don’t necessarily mean you’re a lesbian.”  Eva replies, “What kind of feelings?”  To which Vilde responds “horny”.

This post does a nice job outlining it.

Sana’s Mirror and Foil

Even is Sana’s Mirror (click here if you don’t know what a mirror is, or here to see how Noora was Isak’s mirror in S3)

Even pulled away from Isak after Isak said “I don’t want mentally Ill people in my life”

Sana pulled away from Yousef after he said “I don’t believe in Allah”

Again, God bless Julie Andem, we get to see the perspective of both sides

Even’s struggle with his past vs. his future self, and we’ll probably see him find a great balance, Sana’s struggle with her Muslim self vs her Norwegian self, which again, we will hopefully see resolved.

Noora is Sana’s Foil (click here or here if you don’t know what a foil is)

She is the epitome of the typical Norwegian girl, what Sana thinks she is expected to be like, or what she wants to fit into. The girls in the bathroom saying “wow Noora’s so pretty” Noora kissing Sana’s love interest, etc. etc.

Evak is paralleling Yousana

Evak is the foil to Vildus

I will explain more of that in a later post I will make and link to it

Parallels

Like I said, I’m working on it. It needs to be a whole separate post because this is already so long.

Themes

Figuring out who you are and who you want to be, rather than what others want you to be. In Season 1, when Eva tells Jonas that “his opinion meant more than her own, and that’s not okay.” The central theme of Season 1, reflected again in Season 3 with Isak struggling to fit in with his friends. This also seems to be making a comeback in Season 4, Sana struggling between her Muslim identity, her Norwegian identity, and her personality. She’s the kind of person who’s comfortable with who she is, but I think she has yet to find out who that is.

Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Be kind. Always.

Learn to consider how other people think. Everyone has their reasons for what they do, not everyone will think the way you do, and that’s not necessarily a bad thing. Think back to Sana and Noora and the windowsill talk in Season 2, or in Season 3 when Sana tells Isak “can’t we just agree that there’s a lot between Heaven and Earth that none of us know anything about? Instead of sitting here criticizing my religion, just respect that we’ve chosen different beliefs.”

Alt er love

Predestination. In season 3, with all of the Christianity symbolism and talk of parrallel universes, we see that you can’t see the future. Every choice you make affects the possibilities for the future, so instead of worrying about what you did, and what might happen, just remember that

Life is Now.

Misunderstandings. Season 4. This is pretty self explanatory, and I’m extremely interested to see how his plays out.

Perspective. THIS IS HUGE. THIS IS THE OVERALL THEME OF THE ENTIRE SHOW, SO IT GETS ITS OWN SECTION.

PERSPECTIVE

Oh boy, here we go. The reason why the narrative only stays in one person’s perspective for a whole season is because that’s how we get immersed in the story. We don’t know more than they know, we are frustrated because we don’t know why that other person did that thing to the main. It makes everything more relatable, and hit closer to home. This ties into communication is key, this ties into misunderstandings, this ties into be yourself, this ties into Alt er love, this ties into be kind always. It teaches us that we can’t get into someone else head. We can’t make assumptions about other people. We won’t ever truly understand someone without seeing everything from their perspective.

So remember: Karma’s a bitch, be kind, always, alt er love, and life is... Now.

[scriptpastor]

Hi! In my fantasy story the main goddess is the creator goddess and she has a very long history of being worshiped. Her priestesses can literally speak to her in certain situations, and if she chooses, she can appear to mortals, so she's very real to the people. How might a millenia old religion be structured as far as evolution of places of worship and hierarchy of the priesthood? Sorry if it's out of your realm. Thank you for running this blog!

DISCLAIMER: These replies are only writing advice and intended for entertainment purposes only.  Your personal experiences may vary.  The author accepts no liability stemming from improper use of any material presented here.  I am not here to be your pastor; I am here to help you write better pastors.  If you need real life spiritual advice or are experiencing a spiritual crisis, please search for local resources related to your specific crisis as these will be best equipped to assist you. If the first resource doesn’t work out, try the next one. You matter.

Eh, you could probably look to any of the millennia-old religions in our world today and copy one of them.  XD  These are some of my thoughts:

Unless your goddess actively tries to squash these, places of worship are likely to be really grand.  Humans like building beautiful things, and if they can excuse it as commemorative/glorifying a deity, so much the better.  Everything about the place of worship can be symbolic in some way: murals depicting the Creation; high ceilings to represent the vault of the sky; floors that resemble the sea or the shore; there's a certain architectural detail that always faces the direction of the sunrise. You can add in some very rich detail here to make the religion more real.

Houses of worship (I'm going to start calling them temples, to save myself typing) are often built at sites of great religious significance, like where a miracle was performed or the death of a prophet occurred, etc.  People make pilgrimages to these significant sites, and then someone gets the bright idea to actually build something there so pilgrims have somewhere to spend the night and know which patch of dirt is the one to kneel before, and then you need someone to actually look after the building, so on and so forth.  Eventually there's enough demand that you want to start building additional temples, to serve the people who're too poor or too far away or too lazy to make the pilgrimage, or maybe the idea of pilgrimage itself has been forgotten.  So, for your religion, you might think about where the oldest temples are and what kind of significance that has for the people in your world, and how they might differ, architecturally, from the newer temples.

Alternately, if this is a state-run religion, temples may be located near other buildings of civic importance, like the courthouse and city hall.

The more time goes by and the more people join an organization, the more institutional it's going to become.  When a group of friends get together to start a new business, it's usually very informal and characterized by casual work culture; as it gets larger and people no longer know each other as well, uh oh suddenly you need a human resources department to manage all these personnel and lawyers to manage all the contracts and hey, this place is no fun anymore.  So it is with religious institutions.  It seems likely to me that the priestesses who're able to communicate directly with the goddess will be at the very top, and they'll delegate the responsibilities of actual temple upkeep, conveying the messages of the ordinary people, performing certain rituals, enforcing rules, etc. to acolytes and/or middle managers.  They might have a lot of rules about behavior/who can be a priestess/dress code/whatever because a hundred years ago someone did something dumb and ruined it for everyone else.

It's worth noting that no religion of any size is monolithic.  In the early days of Christianity it would have been more accurate to say that there were "early Christianities," plural, rather than a single "early Christianity." What I'm saying is: is there a significant faction that doesn't like how the temples are being run?  Do some of the priestesses believe that the goddess likes her better than the other priestesses?  Did they, long ago, stamp out some heresies that have simmered under the surface ever since?  Of course, since your goddess is Real to the People she has the option of stepping in to settle these disputes, or maybe she prefers to sit back and popcorn.gif.

That's all I can think of for now.  Hope it helps!

[writetoremainsilent]

11/13/18 the nostalgia rant/i hate memories

You know what time it is, friends? It’s time to rant about nostalgia, as my title indicates. 

I have a love-hate relationship with nostalgia. I hate it, and it loves me. 

I can’t do goshdarn ANYTHING without it popping up in my head, whisking me away to some memory that I really don’t want. And it’s always like people say, how nostalgia sharpens the good and dulls the bad or some crap. I’m constantly plagued by these thoughts like, “Man, what I would do to not be here right now.” 

I get really into these time-travel desires of, like, “you know what sounds nice? You know where I wanna be? 10:32 a.m. of Wednesday, September 14th.” It’s so stupid. It’s so pointless. And it’s so not true. I’m miserable constantly. I know for a fact I was miserable at 10:32 a.m. of Wednesday, September 14th. But the problem is, I’m miserable now. So I’d rather be anywhere but now. Just like, I’m sure, how I felt at 10:32 a.m. of...yeah, you get it. Nostalgia isn’t an actual desire to be somewhere, it’s just my desperate wish to not be here, now. 

But, believe it or not, that’s not why I’m ranting about nostalgia. Its effects on how I view my past are annoying, but manageable. Where it gets really hard is in the present. 

See, I’m aware of my affliction to daydream into the past. And like any good addict, I’m constantly planning out my supply of daydreams and how I can best ration it. So for instance, imagine me now. I’m in the fall quarter of my senior year of college. I know for a fact that I will look back to this quarter with some sort of wistful longing. And because of that, I’m planning things out. I’ve been listening to King Rat with the hopes that the song becomes a conduit of memories for me, I’ve been watching Melee videos that I’m positive will be a nice trip down memory lane, stuff like that. 

I’m completely doing things to cater to the future me. I know how much I’d kick myself for not associating things I love with things I’ll inevitably dream of. The idea of free will and the memes associated come to mind. Regardless of where I stand on that philosophically, it really does feel like I have no free will. I’m a puppet for the future, and I do things now to bring greater joy to my future self. I write down little notes of when exactly I finished an anime or show so I can concretely remember my precise state of mind and life and well-being when I look back on it in the future. I write down when I finish books, similarly. I constantly agonize over when exactly it was that I went to the movies with some friend that one weekend, because I’ll want to know the date, time, temperature when I remember that movie in the future. Heck, I have a blog where I try to jot down the rough details of every single day so I can have something to reminisce on in the future. 

Nothing I do in the present is for myself. Which sounds selfless, but it’s stupid. This could be so easily solved if I learned to appreciate what I’m doing right now, instead of fearing how I’ll remember the event. Kind of like when you see those losers at concert recording the entire freakin’ thing on their phone instead of actually watching the concert. So I can try that, I guess. 

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Disclaimer: this proceeding anecdote is probably the biggest first world problem ever seen on this website. I also apologize for how whiny I’m sounding. 

I’m angrily writing about this whole nostalgia bit about this because of an accidental misstep. I had watched the majority of this Persona 4 playthrough last winter, Holiday 2017. And, my lord, it was the perfect nostalgia cache. Every time I was miserable in the coming school year (which was constantly), I just plugged in a Persona 4 song and was warped back to a ‘happier’ time. And this time, it really was happy, what with my family all around and me chilling in my pajamas. 

But I screwed up by abruptly halting. I just...didn’t watch for a long time. And now, here in Fall 2018, I started watching it again. I didn’t think there’d be any harm, but I went home this past weekend, for Veteran’s Day. 

Every morning of this weekend, I’d sit there, happily in my warm bed, with my cute little doggie coming to greet me and my parents wishing me good morning. And I was watching this accursed playthrough. And I could feel the weight of this nostalgic moment. But the problem was, this moment involved Persona 4. Which effectively shatters my Winter 2017 nostalgia, which I was quite attached to. 

For reference, a similar thing happened in Fall 2017, where I got really into George Michael. I had this obsessive need for a holiday feel, so I listened to his song Last Christmas almost religiously (heh). The thing was, my mom used to listen to that song all the time when I was a young child of maybe 7 or 8. And those childhood memories, man, they’re the happiest. So I could feel my nostalgia receptors shifting and I immediately stopped listening. I couldn’t afford to lose those childhood memories. 

But, I think I’ve lost my Persona 4 Winter memories. Or, at least, I’ll think back to now when I think of Persona 4 primarily. I’ve been watching too much of it now, and I drew some stupid fanart of the characters. It’s really painful, because I plan these things out so calculatedly, and then I screw up by investing time and effort into something I liked in the first place. I’m being punished by future me for trying to casually indulge in an activity. 

So now, Fall/Winter 2017 is kind of...useless? I repeated the same thing just now, so I’ve hit a redundancy. Hopefully anyone reading this can understand how twisted my logic is. This definitely isn’t how things should be, but it’s how it feels to me. 

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Oh, right. This is a blog where I write about things I do in a day.

So, what’d I do today?

Well, I woke up, all ready to drive back to college in the morning. But I got a message saying classes were cancelled. Why? Because of the apocalypse.

So I nestled back into bed and cracked open the Persona 4 playthrough (take a shot for every time I mention Persona), and watched for a little. Then, my dad came home, and we resumed DareDevil season 3, which is fantastic so far, I might add. We watched a loooot of it, and then my mom came home with lunch. 

I tried to study a little, but I can’t for the life of me study at home. So I just chilled. It was a nice day, but had a bit of that “Final Hours” feel from Majora’s Mask. I hate going back to school.

Also, my parents found my art instagram. I’m a little salty about it, but came to terms with it, ‘cuz they just wanna be involved with my life, and it’s not like I have anything worth hiding on there. It’s just crappy fanart. My dad laughed at my bio description, so I guess I really am his kid. 

[joannealiciasd-blog]

Let’s talk about... series

Hi dollies!

This is my first entry here in a long, long time. I’m aware I don’t have many readers here, so I guess my words will dissipate into nowhere, but I thought by writing this, I could get my current thoughts and opinions down, reach a tiny audience, and come back in a few years to see how much I’ve changed, because I’m very sure I will. (I imagine I’ll also be cringing when reading this in future, but it’s okay, that happens when you learn. Hi, future Joanne! Hope you’re doing well!)

As a bit of context as to why I’m starting a series here, I still hold the role of Starblogger in the Stardoll community, and about a month ago, I released a post called “My Perspective” which received a lot of backlash. Basically, I shared my views on Marriage Equality as a conservative Christian during Pride Month, an unpopular opinion, and many users took issue with this opinion.

(Paragraph of rant, not necessary so feel free to skip, I just had to get it out) I honestly thought I shared it in the nicest, most respectful way possible. I wanted to bring attention to the fact that not everyone’s going to share the same opinions, that the world is made up of left and right wing people and that’s okay. Because although there may always be a power struggle in the politicians and media, we as citizens can open our perspectives to others and learn to respect other opinions. It’s no use living in an echo chamber if you want to develop a nuanced understanding of your opinions. And maybe my opinion was that offensive that my point of respect flew over many people’s heads because they proceeded to call me a number of bad names, insult me, label me as a homophobe when I have absolutely no issue with homosexuals as people. Don’t get me wrong, there were some religious or conservative users who were otherwise quiet during the Pride Month activities who actually stepped forward to stand up for me and some other people who disagreed with my conservative view but saw the point I was trying to make and tried to push the conversation forward by respectfully either asking why I believe the way I do or tell me that they still respect my viewpoint. But the other awful users, it really hurt me, which I knew full well I signed up for when I first released the post so I’m not blaming anyone, but I honestly hoped on a site like that, people wouldn’t be as ruthless as they were then. It’s scary what people can say when they hide behind a screen. At the same time, I try to find satire in it to soften the blow, you know, like it’s ironic that they would call me a close minded bigot when I’m trying to say that there exists many opinions. Frankly they’re the ones being close minded, even jumping on the people who are on their side but could see past this and asked them to respect me, also in a respectful way. When good users can see past our differences to prioritise actual transparent humanity, I’m very grateful for that and it really gives me hope that someday a compromise, or at the very least, a mutual agreement to disagree can be found.

Needless to say, I was quite disappointed about the good to bad ratio of responses, but throughout the course of the next few weeks, I was able to strike up some civil productive conversation that I otherwise wouldn’t have been able to and I was very grateful for those.

After all that drama. I’ve been growing more passionate about politics, initially just reading into the topics surrounding the LGBTQIA+ community but gradually expanding out into the other ‘hot topics’ of politics. I considered starting about a series ‘Let’s talk about… (insert topic)’ on Stardoll, but as much as I want my ideas to be heard, I’m not ready to go through that horrible cycle of hate. That’s why I decided, these posts are technically ‘not making the cut’ by me for my Starblog, so I’ll publish them here, since that’s what I promised when I was first granted my Starblogger role.

I’ll start with an introduction about me.

As you know, I’d consider myself a conservative. However, I see politics as a spectrum of left to right. with the far right being totalitarian/dictatorial and far left being Marxist/communist Some people sit near the extremes, more accomodating people closer to the centre. Talking about explicitly left or right is easy, but not accurate, because even within each of the sides, there are still many discrepancies. Right now I like to think I’m closer to the centre. I grew up in a Christian, conservative family with parents and relatives who were also heavily conservative having immigrated out of Maoist (communist) China after a long history of persecution as a result of their religion. Me being born in Australia, I was blissfully unaware and followed along blindly. My early diaries were extreme, following the likes of ‘gay people are bad, it is a sin and they need to repent’, shocking stuff like that but if it softens the blow, it was what I was taught ever since I was little and I didn’t know any better. I was essentially living in an echo chamber, which is exactly why I now strongly support free speech and sharing all views. We as a race aren’t going to get anywhere without listening to each other, the divides are only going to widen and we’re going to end up quarrelling about the tiniest of issues.

Back to me, you’ll be surprised to hear, I made a big jump across the spectrum. Yep, I became a lefty. I was in my pre-teen phase and was becoming a lot more involved on social media, watched a lot of Buzzfeed, and as a result, reread and was absolutely shocked at the contents of my old diaries. Finally, as a young teen, I promptly decided I was going to do an extreme 180 on my political views. This lasted about 3 years, I was very passionate, but when I sought out discussion in my attempts to persuade my family too, I soon realised I had nothing to base it on except a few outdated facts and my own emotional response alone. I started to think about why I believed the way I did because as important as emotions are, they’re not something to base all of your life off. I also sought out more liberal and conservative sources as well as consulting my church peers who would be more understanding of what I was going through since they could relate to me easier.

Now, I’m back to being conservative, but I hope with a more nuanced understanding of how each side works, having been on them both. There are still some topics in which I maintain a liberal view on, simply because nothing has persuaded me on those yet, but for the most part, I am conservative. The ideal would be to sit in the middle, but frankly, it’s such a fine line, it’s impossible to do that so I strive to be as understanding as I can.

The topics I want to address in this series (may add more)

Homosexuality

Marriage equality

Feminism

Gun-control

Abortion

Religious freedom

Racism

Hate speech

Body positivity

The victim complex

Gender

Finally, a big disclaimer 

I don’t claim to be an expert on any of these topics. I’m just a student who reads things in her spare time. If you read my words and find something you disagree with or even just see something that I missed, please tell me. This series is my thoughts at this moment in time. 

Like I said at the start, I’m very confident that I will change over time, not necessarily switching sides, but maybe just how strongly I believe things or the reasons why I believe things. I want to learn as much as I can. My only request is that we remember we are all humans with feelings, and although we can hide behind our screen names here, words still have big impacts on us, I know that too well. If you do decide to give me feedback, please respect me and I will respect you. With respect, we can be civil and push the conversation forward.

Take care,

♡ Joanne

(*For my future reference. I am currently 17 years old. I am midway through Year 12, Australia. Much of this is influenced by Extension English, see: Research Notes - Jane Austen and Worldviews doc)

edit: I’ve consolidated my political views and did the quiz on australia.isidewith.com. Lo and behold, I’m a centrist (though still slightly conservative and authoritarian), which I’m quite pleased with, since I do believe in keeping an open mind but maintaining some traditional values/morals, a compromise. And though politics is tricky and manipulative, our government isn’t out to ruin our lives... surprise surprise! I highly recommend doing that quiz, just pick your own country (the questions will vary). I guess sharing my personal results wouldn’t hurt, so if you want to explicitly see where I stand, here it is: https://australia.isidewith.com/results/3529756200  Also, I’ve graduated now. Woo hoo!