#don't fucking prone conversation and listen to people and “im here for you and to help” when you just don't give a shit. and ignore ppl

[chaotictomtom]

cannot stop thinking abt what she said i'm loosing my mind i think ive lost the ability to have peace of mind ever this that """conversation""" 5h ago. like i keep realising shit and augh!!! auuuugh!!!!!wtf!!!

[starboy-acer]

“get him back!” [Chip JRWI x You!]

(this is the "slightly spicy" one. basically im just being more detailed abt kissing instead of just saying "passionately" or some bs like that)

(very slight spoiler warning for a mention of jazz and mid-later game crew members)

you chug back another shot of vodka and slam the glass down on the bar. you look back at the barkeep who just gives you a slightly disappoint sigh and tops off your drink.

"don't look at me like that. at least i'm paying, plenty of people here wouldn't. given that this is outlaw land, after all." your words slur together slightly. you're not completely drunk, but definitely tipsy.

your reasoning for trying to drown out your sorrows with liquor are complicated. complicated just like your relationship with chip. you aren't exactly dating, but there's no denying the feelings between you two. you can't tell if its actually love or just some sort of lust or passion for him, and chip can't tell what his feelings are for really anyone. all you know is you get extremely jealous on your adventures whenever chip tries to pick up women, and then you heave a sigh of relief whenever he inevitably fails. whenever jazz had flirted with chip after that whole fight between the crews and the giant sea monster, you almost punched him in the face. and by him, you definitely mean chip, not jazz.

you're fairly new to the crew so its difficult to say anything about your feelings for chip. you don't know much about his life; you don't even know his last name. you just know that you have a soft spot for funny, cocky men. it also doesn't help that whenever you're alone, things get a little tense.

for example, the night before you got to land, you and chip were alone together on the deck, except for alphonze. you were just talking about the most random stuff. chip was talking to you about his new found power of "hot hands" and talking about going "hot mode". you made a joke that he's always in hot mode. he didn't get it, so you clarified that it's because he's attractive. just like a romcom, the ship hit a wave that made you slip and fall into him. you both fell with you on top of him and turned bright red, but you didn't move immediately. chip didn't say anything, he just kissed you. it wasn't the first time you guys had kissed. however, last time you were drunk. the time before that, chip was drunk. this time, you were both sober. you definitely knew it wasn't a completely thought-out action from him as he is prone to impulsiveness, but you definitely didn't care. i'm sure he could tell that you didn't care because you ran your hands up his arms as he snaked his hands around your waist and pulled you as close to him as possible. you're sure it would've gone further if it wasn't for alphonze chastising you two and telling you to go to bed. "and go to SEPERATE beds." he had emphasized. the next morning, he didn't say anything about it and just went off with jay and gillion to do whatever it was they were doing there while you went to the nearest hotel, book a room, then headed to a tavern.

you had noticed chip walk into the tavern alone a few minutes ago. whatever the captains had to do here, it didn't take but around two hours. you assumed that jay and gillion were off doing their own thing, and chip hadn't noticed you yet. he walked around, got a quick drink, and then was approached by a beautiful dark elf woman. you had to refrain from squeezing the glass so hard that it broke.

being a wizard, you knew how to fuck with them without being caught, but you decided against it for now. instead, you just listened in to their conversation from afar.

"i haven't seen you around here at all," the dark elf said to him while touching his arm and running her fingers along his firey tattoo. "nice tattoo, where'd ya get it?"

"ah, just someplace. somewhere. not important! i'm chip, what's your name?"

"zidara. nice to meet you, chip. very nice to meet you."

"zidara..." he dragged out the name and smiled. "gorgeous name for a gorgeous lady."

"aw, you flatter me. what are you in town for?"

the conversation continued on. it was incredibly boring for you. it was just small talk and exchanging compliments. the moment you started really paying attention was when she started playing with his hair and getting all up on him, and he wasn't denying her. you had to play your cards right here. you didn't want to piss off chip, but you wanted to get her away from him. you decided to discreetly cast telekinesis and just push her back ten feet. the dark elf was ripped from chip's arms and as she let out a yelp, chip looked around for the caster. he locked eyes with you and you simply waved. his eyebrows furrowed as he turned back to the dark elf and pulled her up. he apologized and claimed he didn't know what happened. he turned her around so that her back was to you and he could see you. he caressed her face. you couldn't tell what was being said, but there wasn't much before he kissed her. his other hand wrapped around her waist and you saw him flip up his middle finger at you from behind the elf's back.

you stood up from the bar and went up to a guy who had hit on you moments before chip walked in. you talked him up. it wasn't exactly hard to talk him up either. you were gorgeous and he was tipsy. it didn't take long before you were able to get him to kiss you, but before his lips even touched yours, you were getting pulled away.

"hey, what the fuck?" you yelled as you turned to look at who was pulling you. it was none other than chip, the bastard that just made a whole scene to piss you off. he didn't say a word as he dragged you outside to a more secluded place by the tavern. he let you go and you turned to him.

"what the hell, chip. what was that?"

"i was getting you away from him." chip replied. "i could tell you weren't into him. you just wanted to piss me off."

"no shit, sherlock. you kissed that elf just to piss me off!"

chip crossed his arms and looked down at you (he's a good few inches taller). "that's different."

"literally, no it isn't. that guy was hitting on me just like five minutes before you walked in."

"how long have you been there?!"

"none of your business, chip."

"it is my business. you are my business."

"oh, really? and why is that, chip? i definitely didn't feel like your business when you blew me off this morning."

"last night was a mistake and you know that."

"didn't feel like a mistake when your hands almost wandered under my shirt."

chip scoffed. "you're the one who had their hands feeling up my arms."

"i think having hands on your arms is not near as intimate as having someone's hands on your bare back."

"you're being impossible right now."

"I'M BEING IMPOSSIBLE?!" you chuckled. "oh, that's rich. that's actually insane."

"you're being crazy! you're expecting shit to happen from a few accidents."

"i cannot stress this enough, but i do not think that having your tongue in my mouth or hands all over my body is an ACCIDENT."

chip just scoffed again and looked off to the side. you decided to press further. "why are you so afraid of admitting that we like each other? things would be so much easier if you did."

"i have my fucking reasons, okay." chip sighed. "listen, i'm sorry. my reasons for pushing you away are irrelevant. i shouldn't have even done it in the first place. i do like you, i really do."

"you have a pretty shit way of showing it."

"i haven't actually shown it at all. i'm very good at showing it when i do."

"yeah, i'm sure." you said with obvious sarcasm. it's not that you didn't believe him, it's that you wanted him to show you. you wanted to know what he meant by that. chip raised an eyebrow at you. before he could speak, you suggested that you go back to the hotel where the crew is and to get some rest, as it's late, and you can talk when everyone heads to bed. you didn't want to continue this conversation around anyone else because whether it went bad or good, you didn't want anyone else around to hear it.

you both walked silently to the hotel where the crew was gathered in the lobby. the lobby here was a big meeting spot for guests at the hotel, perfect for your large crew. gryffon had already headed to bed and alphonze was out doing maintenance on the ship, and earl was out buying more fruit. it was just jay, gillion, ollie, and queen left in the lobby. jay was messing around with some contraption of hers with ollie with gillion and queen were trying to make a song. jay waved at you when you walked in and gillion called chip over for some input on their song. you told everyone that you were going to head to bed and what room you were in, just in case anyone needed you. when you got to your room, you changed into some more comfortable clothes. right before you could get in bed, chip barged in and walked over to you. he pulled you close to him and just said, "this is me showing you that i like you," before kissing you.

one hand was on your hip, pulling you into him, while the other was tangled in your hair and holding your head in place. your wrapped your arms around his neck as you turned and fell onto the bed. chip's coat quickly started to get in the way, so he pulled away for a moment. he smiled and looked down at you below him before throwing his coat out of the way and smashing his lips back into yours. his hands quickly began to wander as they ran down your side and tugged at the bottom of your shirt before sliding up and under it. your hands ran up his back. your hands were cold as they naturally were, but his body was warm. it was a nice sensation to both of you. chip's leg split yours apart and rest just between them so that he could get more comfortable as he pulled away from your face and kissed your cheek, then your jawline, all the way down to your neck. you breathed out softly as he kissed your neck and gasped when he lightly bit you. he just laughed and looked up at you. you rolled your eyes and he kissed your cheek and then your lips again.

before anything else could happen, jay and gillion kicked down the door. "I KNEW THERE WAS SOME EVIL HAPPENING HERE!" gillion yelled while pointing at you two before he realized what was happening. "wait. WHAT?!"

chip scrambled to get his coat and cleared his throat. "gillion, jay. what are you two doing here. this isn't your room."

"this isn't yours either!" gillion said while looking between you and chip.

jay very quickly noticed a red mark on your neck from where chip had bit you and laughed. "don't get too rowdy in here. we have things to do tomorrow. let's go, gill."

"DON'T DO ANY EVIL. I WILL KNOW!" he said as jay dragged him out of your room. chip then promptly went to the door, locked it, and threw his coat to the side.

you yawned as you walked out to the lobby where the rest of the crew was having breakfast. you went and sat beside chip and he kissed you on the cheek before handing you some food. you noticed that everyone was staring at you and you looked up at them. jay was giggling, gillion's jaw was hitting the floor, and ollie was looking at chip and then at you.

"why does your neck have purple spots?" ollie asked while pointing at your neck. you almost spit out your juice.

"i'm sorry? what?"

earl spoke up. "ya got hickies! nasty kids..."

you looked over at chip and he was just smiling and enjoying his food. you promptly slapped the back of his head and he burst out into laughter.

"what are hickies?" ollie asked earl. earl opened his mouth to speak, but gillion held a sword to him.

"do not speak of this evil to the young boy. chip, you are a bad father."

"HEY!"

[pastelraes-blog]

Bitch Why Are You Like This: meeting Miss & Daddy (Jan 22)

A picture of me looking at me during the entire evening.

Starring: Daddy, Miss and a bitch (that's me!)

i've been thinking about my meeting with Miss and Daddy. Before that very moment, i have never felt young. Truly young - innocent, energetic, inexperienced, requiring guidance, in-over-my-head. Ever. Welcome to childhood, bitch.

Miss is fucking amazing. Although intense, she embodies the person i want to be. There's a quiet strength about her, a self-assurance, and she's beautiful. When the hostess pointed her out, i was quite sure i'd die before ever reaching the table. But here i am. Still living. While sitting at the table i marveled at how blessed i felt. Do i know what the fuck i'm doing? No. Do i know what i'm getting myself into? Hell no. But i trust in the experience Miss has, her thorough questioning, and deliberate actions.

For a moment, i wondered about sex trafficking. Atlanta is the sex trafficking hub of the nation, and to get women, sex traffickers often recruit other women. Because girls/women feel safer with and trust women more than men. With reason. But i requested to see and talk to her and Daddy was kind enough to let that happen.

And then in comes Daddy. i doubted He was real but He sure as fuck is, and boy do i feel little. It's not something i've ever experienced in my life. And i like it a lot (question mark?). i was pretty sure i was going to fuck some shit up and fuck some shit up i did. He told me to ask Him a question. i didn't feel i deserved to ask a question and quite frankly i was suffering from slight sensory overload and i didn't have a question to ask. Every question i had left my mind the moment He asked. Somehow, i found one - something about my age. i don't remember what i asked or His answer. i do remember getting comfortable and asking another question. He leans forward and says, "What part of one question do you not understand?" and i respond, "the one part." 🤦🏽‍♂️ Internally, i was yelling at myself to shut the fuck up.

And then He looked at me.

He looked *into* me

and i fell

When i was 4 or 5 or 6 (who the fuck knows honestly) my mother took me and my sister (who was 2 or 3 or 4) to a pool. i could somewhat swim but knew i should never cross 4 feet deep. Keeping this in mind, i jumped in the pool. And then i started drowning; the '4 feet' pool marker was missing and i thought i was jumping into 3 feet water. As i drowned, there was no panic. i felt no discomfort. i remember being surrounded by light blue waves. Looking up to see the sun shining through the water. i was at peace. There was no sound, there was no disturbance. And then i closed my eyes.

And when i opened them i was staring into Daddy's.

*still*

There's a common descriptor phrase - looking like a deer in headlights - and i have had the terribly unfortunate opportunity to witness this in reality in the passenger seat of my grandfather's jeep speeding toward a deer at 50 miles per hour.

and i am the deer

and the deer is me

drowning in water

over four feet deep

with eyes staring into Daddy's

Eventually i look away. And to mask my terror - that i could feel the depth of those experiences, i do the worst possible thing i could do in the moment: i look back at him defiantly & *i get smug*. And when i return my attention to Miss, i am smiling. Daddy asks Miss if i have signed the waiver yet and he says to get that done *as soon as possible*

A bitch is in trouble .

Should i be terrified for my life? Should i try to suck His ****? Who knows 🤷🏾‍♂️ (lxlzkzkzjkzjzb why am i like this! 😳🤣). Fuck Twilight AND ESPECIALLY fuck its fanfic 50 Shades, but Bella. Sweetie. If this is how you felt when Eddy-boy stared at you, i understand and im sorry for ever doubting you.

The night goes on. Daddy pours his coffee in a very particular manner. i am very thankful for Miss. They work well together. A perfect balance. She asks about me staring down Daddy and asks if i wanted to or felt like i should look away. Hell yeah i wanted to look away. i felt like i should look away. i wanted desperately to look away. i couldn't. And then it felt like maybe i shouldn't look away? Like what was this Man thinking i wondered. And when i caught myself looking i realized i kinda didn't want to stop? A bitch is a brat. Why do i poke the Lion? i don't knoooww 😭. Miss says she can't imagine me being submissive and that hurts a lot.

And of course in typical fashion of one who emotes (?) dramatically, i begin to cry. Because being smug is a defense mechanism. Bucking authority is another. i have had to puff myself up and build up walls and be hard for so long to *survive* and i don't want to be like that anymore. It's not me. i didn't have a childhood. i've always felt impossibly old. At 10, i raised my siblings for four years while momma went to college. because making 6k a year aint shit with 4 kids. At 14 when she finished, she wanted her role and her power back, but the children didn't recognize her as momma. And she hated it. It was a constant power struggle. To me she was irrational, led by the heart and prone to overreaction. Her favorite punishment aside from capital punishment was to take away everything i cared about at any moment *because she could*. So i became smug. *Because fuck you.*

Fast forward 4 years when i finally get to college and shit aint much better. i'm in an environment i wasn't ready for academically. The learning curve was exponential with a slope asymptote to infinity (undefined). That joint is a straight line lol. People are mad racist, dudes are mad sexist, the black people super rich and i'm slipping into depression. When i took a break from school last semester, i learned the traits i picked up - the way i operate in groups/the constant fight - don't work in other environments. It's dangerous to myself and it hurts others. And i don't want to be like that anymore. this is what i've had to do to survive all my life and it's ugly and it's not me.

i'm done with surviving. i want to thrive. i want to *live*. i want to submit desperately, i just don't know how. i'm tired of being defiant and smug and provoking because it's not me. i care so deeply for people, and i struggle because my face, my words, and my attitude are incongruent. When shit is bad, and i mean real bad, i smile and laugh. Not because something is funny or amusing - i smile because it isn't. i guess i started smiling cuz that's much simpler than bursting into tears. And these behaviors are habits i desperately want to break. my life has been fight after fight and resistance and war. i've made it so i would not submit to the negative forces in my life, but now i don't know how to accept the good. and that's why it hurts me so much when i smile at Miss or stare down Daddy when i would truly love not to be.

i was sure after that fiasco i'd never hear from them again. i failed so epically at something i know myself to be. regardless of the tears (because i definitely cried more last night), i am so thankful for that one opportunity to be in the presence of Miss and Daddy. The experience allowed me to gaze intently at those very ugly behaviors that i didnt truly recognize until last night. i left feeling like i failed a lot. But that failure was good because it was necessary. i'm now one step closer to knowing the person i am and transforming into the person i want to be.

Miss told me to look up what submission means and give ten examples of when i have ever done that in my life. For a moment i was quite terrified because i don't think i have ever submitted to someone or something without resistance first.

Submission - the action or fact of accepting or yielding to a superior force or to the will or authority of another person; an act of surrendering to a hold by one's opponent; humility; meekness

Okay the '10 examples' activity is super hard because i see now i've been the bitch reluctant to listen and follow. people must loved me to put up with this shit. Jesus take the wheel.

i still don't think i'm off the hook. i live on the hook. i am the worm 😂. i'm super disappointed in myself, but my love for myself has not changed. i'm really proud of myself for taking the chance and putting myself out there and meeting people who i fantasize about binding me, dragging keys down my back until i bleed, whipping my *****, leaving marks/bruises and other normal shit like calling me hideous degrading names and looking at me in ways that make my entire being quiver. If we're being 300,000% truthful, though i didn't intend to fuck up, the intensity of those moments, the acute embarrassment i felt, the topic of conversation in that public environment is something i truly enjoyed and if given the chance to experience it again i definitely would. ☺️

Eventually i'll ask Miss about her role because she's Daddy's sub but i have to pass her first to get to Daddy. Does that mean one day she's going to hand me off and i don't get to have her as Miss anymore 😢? i'm going to enjoy things as they are and take them as they come. Because i like Daddy & Miss a lot 🤷🏾‍♂️

[hippityhoppityyourenowmyproperty]

Reset! Rant (part 3)

Chapter: 16

That familiar feeling of rage returned to him. His fist and teeth clenched and he had the urge to hit something, preferable someone. Bart was the first thing that came to his mind, but he had better control of his Impulses than his brother did. He couldn't let Thawne win.

This is another big hypocrisy moment. He is not better at controlling his impulses than Bart is. Whenever he gets angry, he starts insulting and picking on Bart. He hurt Bart before because he couldn't take Kon making fun of him, and while doing so, he made the mission more dangerous and more prone to failure. He let's his anger out on Bart every time, and he had multiple agressive outburst. He's not as in control as the story leads on.

Bart hopped to his feet and rocked on his heels. "I screw up all the time. Everyone says so. That's why I'm not supposed to do the hero thing without an adult. That's why I wasn't invited to join the Teen Titans."

"Are you kidding me?" Thad's tone was sharp and angry. "What business does anyone have in telling you you how to help people? What business do you have in even listening to them? I don't see you calling yourself Kid Flash and running at Wally's side like and obedient puppy. You're not a side kick."

...................................."In any case, we're more than capable of operating on our own. We don't need some nosy busybodies lording over us and expecting obedience just because of the legacy we inherited."

At the first glance, this looks like Thad trying to emotionally support Bart and make him feel better. At the second look, not so much. Let's untangle what exactly is happening in this conversation. Bart is explaining why he is still supposed to have adult supervision, namely because people think that he can't handle missions on his own and that he'll mess up. Then Thad argues that he's not a side kick and therefore no one should tell him how to do the hero thing. Which...doesn't really makes sense. It was said that the reason why people are convinced that Bart can't be a hero without some guidance is not because he's part of a legacy, it's because they think that because of his impulsiveness and trouble at focusing he will screw them up. They're not expecting obedience because Bart is part of a legacy, they're expecting a willingness of Bart to work with a mentor because he's not experienced enough and will mess up at being a hero, otherwise.

Thad is self-projecting here. If he didn't misunderstand the situation for being about legacy, he wouldn't have tried to make Bart feel better. I'm certain he's just saying this because he's angry about the legacy he is conected to. The only reason Thad rants about Wally is because it reminds him of his situation with his legscy, and not becaus he's mad at Wally for being mean to Bart. Again, Thad is doing this for himself.

Remember when I told you to keep in mind what Thad said about Bart somewhere in Chapter 11? "Bart lacks the capacity of forethought that is requiered in an operation like this"? Also remember how Thad is always insulting Bart's intelligence, criticizes him and says that he won't survive without him? So what about the "In any case, we're more than capable of operating on our own"? This is not Thad suddenly making a turn around and seeing the flaws of his thoughts he had earlier. Thad's always saying what fits his interests best. He changes his opinions on whatever suits him best at the moment. He's such an obvious hypocrit at this point. He's bending his opinions on whatever he needs them to be. This is one of the most in your face instance of Thad gaslighting Bart. Through denial, controdiction and lies relating to his actions and words, he's planting seeds of doubt in Bart. Thad is making Bart question his own perception of memory, perception of reality and his sanity, whether Thad is intentionally gaslighting Bart or not doesn't matter. It's still damaging.

Chapter: 17

Thad thumped his fist against the garage door. "At least I had Craydl before. Now, I'm stuck with you." He glared at Bart again.

Gosh what a horrible fate, Thad. I feel so sorry for you. No really, I can't fathom what an awful nightmare this must be for you! He can never be satisfied, can he? He can count himself lucky that Bart is tolerating his toxic behavior. He is stuck with Thad. Bart is the one who has to put up with his constant belittling and verbal abuse. No one forced Thad to stay at Bart's home, Thad just decided that it now be that way. If it bothers him so much he could've asked to stay with the Garricks. Which would've also made more sense for everyone involved because Jay has superspeed and can look after Thad in case he would try to kill anyone else again.

Also note how Thad is threatening Bart through his gestures.

"Besides, mom said I'm the big brother and that's what big brothers are supposed to do." Rolling his eyes, Thad snorted, "Thanks for the touching moment, but it's not making my situation any better."

This is a form of withholding. It's also condescending demeanor.

Thad clenched his jaw and fists and said nothing in return. He stalked back into the house, punching the doorframe as he passed by.

He threatens Bart yet again.

I'm pressing buttons", Thad snapped. "What does that accomplish? This-" He pointed at the television, "is frivolous. It does nothing!" Bart tilted his head, looking at his brother then the controller. Then, without a word, he punched Thad. Startled, Thad stared at him, and then noticed the surprised expressions on Jay's and Helen's faces. Bart stood up. "Well, aren't ya gonna hit me?" Thad eyed Bart warily and stood. "What is this? Is this a trick?"

"No I'm serious. Hit me." When Thad hesitated, Bart insisted, "Fighting game im real life. Right here." Helen sucked in a breath as she realized what Bart was up to. "Not in the house." Bart nodded and grabbed Thad's arm. "C'mom! I know a place that's still in Manchester." When they ran off, Jay tipped his head to Helen. "I'll keep an eye om them." Once the boys were sure that nobody other than Jay was watching, Bart faced Thad with a combative stance.

Thad struck with a punch and Bart blocked with his forearms. Jay stood aside and watched, ready to intervene in case the fight got out of hand. Every now and then, a particularly solid strike by either boy, he tensed up and stepped forward, but they would continue on as if there was nothing to worry about. As Jay watched, he saw Thad smile for the first time. It was a wicked, predatory grin, full of bloodthirsty pleasure. Bart wasn't smiling. Instead, it was taking everything he had to hold himself against Thad. Sparks of static and stray speed force lightning trailed after them. Then Thad slipped past Bart's defenses and slammed down with an elbow and up with a knee. The next thing Bart knew he was looking up at Jay's concerned face. The elder speedster held out an arm to halt Thad. Thad's yellow eyes gleamed and he was still smilling, spoiling for more. Jay held out his other hand to help Bart to his feet. "You all right, son?"

This whole scene is so wrong, in so many ways, for so many reasons. Yes, you read this right. Bart suggested that Thad beat him up in order to let Thad get rid of his anger. Jay and Helen hear this offer, and say fucking nothing about it. Once again, they're irresponsible and neglectful. Helen shows absolute zero concern for Bart's well being. For crying out loud, the first thing she says after she realizes what Bart's suggesting is: "Not in the house." I repeat, the first thing that comes to her mind after she hears that Bart offers getting beat up by Thad is: "Oh no! My poor house! Everything will be so messed up!" I mean, damn. You have to be a really neglient, bad parent when you're more concerned with the state of your house than with the physical and mental health of your child. Helen and Jay should have been disgusted and put off by this offer. Helen should have said something along the lines of: "If Thad has anger issues, then that is his problem to work through, not yours. It's not your responsibility to keep his emotions under control. You are not his personal punshing bag, and you shouldn't put his well being before your own. No one expects you to make sacrifices like that for him." But nope, she is more afraid of what will happen to her precious kitchen than of the fact that Thad might break every bone that Bart has in his body because he feels like it. They both know what Bart is suggesting, and they don't see anything wrong with it whatsoever. They should have been horrified by this suggestion.

And keep in mind: This all happens after Thad killed the clone and almost killed Max and Bart. Helen knew of both altercations. She knows how brutal and vicious he can get. She knows that Thad is quick to violence, so why isn't she more concerned? Wouldn't she be at least a little scared that Thad might kill Bart because he can't control his brutal urges again? The only resonable explanation I can find is that she doesn't care about Bart. That's why she let's this happen, that's why she allows Thad to emotionally abuse Bart and call him names right in front of her eyes. She never makes Thad apologize for what he does to Bart, not even once. I don't like accusing her of favoritism, but that is what it looks like. Seeing how dispicable Thad's actions and words are is not that hard. Helen should have noticed by now. Jay isn't much better in this. He watched until Thad hit Bart so hard that he fainted and collapsed. I know that I couldn't stand idly by while watching a kid beat up another kid until he lost his conciousness and still feel like a good person.

If you think that we've hit rock bottom yet with this scene, think again.. Jay's and Helen's complete lack of concern makes Bart's actions seem like this was a healthy, acceptable way of helping people deal with their anger. That this is something normal in a sibling relationship. Worse, that offering someone to hurt you so that they can relieve their anger is something that is expected of you. A relationship where one part is expected to take responsibility for the other's negative emotions is a twisted, damaging one. You get what this is saying? "Someone's anger justifies them hurting and beating you up." This is just as bad as "abuse justifies abuse" (Which is also being taught here.) God, those are terrible, atrocious morals to teach to people. What Helen should have done with Thad the moment he moved in with them was taking him to an anger management class and getting him a good therapist, not ignore/encourage Thad's abusive tendencies.

Jay sat down at the table. "He's not as mean as his brother though. That kid...For his own grandfather to make him like that..." Jay shook his head with a frown. "If I ever get a chance to meet that man..." He clenched his fist on the table. "I hope I never do."

"Same here", Helen replied.

Seems like Thad's not the only one who takes a liking to being hypocritical and two-faced. This makes total sense, talk about poor Thad and all the abuse he went trough, but completely ignore the fact that he is abusing and actively inflicting pain on Bart right now. They're furious about what Thawne did to Thad, but when Thad does the same things to Bart it's totally okay and fair. In case you couldn't tell, this is a shit moral. Stop trying to justify abuse by saying that the abuser has been trough a lot and just needs an outlet. Having been abused does not give Thad the right to ruin Bart's life. It does not give him the permission to be a toxic jerk to him. He should be held accountable for his actions. Abuse doesn't justify abuse.

Chapter: 18

"So, you don't know anything on how to properly maintain it." Thad snorted and rolled his eyes. "Wonderful. Do you know where engineering is? Take me there. I'll do what you neglected to do and actually learn about the mechanics of this ship." Bart opted to ignore Thad's nasty tone, brushing it aside as just how Thad talked.

....................................

"If I'll get lonely, I'll come visit." Thad snidely assured. Not wanting to listen to another degrogatory rant, Bart decided to just let Thad find the room on his own.

This is critizising and judging and a put down, delivered with a very very condescending tone and manner. Do me a favor and take a shot everytime you read the sentences "Thad snorted" or Thad rolled his eyes." You'll be drunk in no time, trust me. Bart has been exposed to Thad's emotional abuse so long that at this point he is willing to accept Thad's verbal abuse as normal.

Chapter: 19

Thad:"They probably got distracted by with something shiny."

Thanks again Thad, for enforcing hurtful insults and exaggerated stereotypes about people with ADHD.

Thad:"Moron! Can't you come up with something that simple?"

Again with the name calling and the put down linked to Bart's ADHD.

"He's a nuisance" grumbled Thad.

"Not that I've had much first hand experience, but that's what siblings generally are, from what I've heard."

"So wanting to strangle Bart is normal?" Cissi laughed. "Everyone's wanted to strangle Bart at one point or another. That's just him."

Oh now it all makes sense! It's Bart's own fault for being abused because he's so annoying! Remember folks, if you've been abused, it's your own fault. If you hadn't been so burdensome, they wouldn't have treated you this way. They can't be responsible for their actions, it has to be you! How can we expect them to control their impulses and get a handle on their anger? That really would be too much to ask of them. The victim is to blame for being abused, that's obviously the logical conclusion here, right? God I hate this fic so much.

This whole conversation serves one purpose: Normalizing and rationalizing Thad's repugnant behavior towards Bart. Look! This is how healthy sibling relationships work! This is how they're supposed to be! Except not really.

This conservation is actually very cleverly done, because it only shows Thad's oppinion while stimuntaneously making it seem like Cissi agrees with his values about relationships when she's really not. They're coming from two completely different points of views, but that is concealed here.

Starting with the "He's a nuisance."

"That's what siblings generally are."

I get her statement, there will be many times when one can get annoyed with their sibling and not find themselves in an abusive relationship. Every sibling pair fights and argues, that's in the nature of things. It only gets problematic when that's literally the only thing you do. When the only thing you are to each other is an annoyance and someone to get mad at. When every encounter with them ends in hurtful words and accusations. Indicating that your brother/sister is sometimes a nuisance in a playful, teasing way is fairly common in healthy sibling relationships. "Those 5 minutes before you were born? Haha, those were the best 5 minutes of my life." Something like this is normal. The problem here? Thad doesn't mean what he says in a sarcastic or playful way. He's completely serious with this. This is all he sees in Bart. An annoying idiot who always stands in his way. There's no sympathy and no compassion for Bart. Only unjustified resentment and hatred. See, in a positive brother or sister relationship the individuels really love each other. Despite the jokes they sometimes make about not wanting the other around, they see more in their sibling than an annoyance. Thad doesn't, and that's what Cissi misunderstands. Thad is dead serious about his feelings towards Bart in this conversation. All he sees in Bart is a nuisance he has to tolerate. He has nothing but contempt for him. He doesn't try to see more in him than that. Thad has no right to complain about Bart. He has been nothing but nice to him. Despite all the shit he put Bart through, despite Bart still tolerating and trying to support Thad in every way he could, Thad somehow still has the audacity, the arrogance to make himself out to be the victim in this situation. Thad is an abusive jerk to him, if anyone has the right to vent, it's Bart.

Moving on to the "So wanting to strangle him is normal?" argument. Feeling a desire to hurt your sibling 24/7 just for existing isn't normal. Cissi means what she say in a more playful, harmless way. None of Bart's friends would go through with harming Bart because he was annoying them. There's a big difference between wanting to do something, and actually doing something. Moreover, Cissi doesn't get that Thad would like to hurt Bart all the time and not only when he was being annoying. Thad wants to hurt Bart even when he is nice to him. Thad means it in a "If Bart looks im my direction one more time I might strangle him and I really don't care if I accidently suffocate him and he dies." Cissi doesn't. Thad is aggressive and violent to him for absolute no reason. The emotions Thad feels towards Bart aren't normal, not in the least. Stop trying to justify his abusive behavior.

And, I think this goes without saying, hurting someone solely because they're annoying you isn't okay, either.