#edgarafe

[nolanhollogay]

edgarafe: an exploration (sources under the cut)

saltburn (2023) - emerald fennell/marcel proust/smell ya later - killing eve s2e5/nosugarallspicenothingnice on pinterest/mothering - ainslie hogarth/something in the water by me :)/arsony - ethel cain/fleabag s2e6/take me to church - hozier/something in the water/frankenstein - mary shelley/it's impossible to keep white moths - emily skaja/i cannot find the source so if anyone knows it pls tell me

taglist: @witchofinterest @richitozier @partiallypearl @eddysocs @dogscomplex @compoundvee @hiddenqveendom @daughter-of-melpomene @bibaybe @joshdiaz

[dogdaysof]

SOMETHING IN THE WATER, ACT TWO.

Rafe and Edgar reunite.

taglist:

@witchofinterest @nikosasaki @daughter-of-melpomene @dogscomplex @compoundvee @hiddenqveendom @bibaybe @partiallypearl @joshdiaz

[nolanhollogay]

you're just like me.

taglist: @witchofinterest@kentaroranda@partiallypearl@eddysocs@dogscomplex@compoundvee@hiddenqveendom@daughter-of-melpomene@bibaybe@joshdiaz

[nolanhollogay]

i love you like my canines are falling out of my gums. like a monster, like a beast.

taglist: @richitozier @witchofinterest @compoundvee @daughter-of-blood-and-starlight @joshdiaz

[nolanhollogay]

i'm sorry I'm the one you love, no one will ever love me like you again

[nolanhollogay]

"What about Mikey?"

"What about him?"

[nolanhollogay]

I've got my mind on you...

[nolanhollogay]

yeah

[nolanhollogay]

"You're safe, I promise."

vaguely s3 extremely insane rafedgar moment For Me

+

Edgar woke up in a bed he didn't recognize. The sheets were warm from the sun streaming in through the open curtains. He blinked, groggy, and grunted when he was struck with a pounding in the back of his skull.

He moved to hold his head, only to realize that his arms were handcuffed to the headboard.

"What the fudge?" he whispered.

His heart began to jackhammer in his chest. He didn't know where he was or what was going on. When he tried to remember the night before, everything was fuzzy, nothing but lights and colors, shapeless and unhelpful.

"Good, you're awake."

Stepping into the light was Rafe Cameron. Bile rose in Edgar's throat.

He sat on the side of the bed next to Edgar's feet. "Morning."

Edgar pulled his legs up to his chest. "What is going on? Did you freaking kidnap me?"

Rafe's smile didn't meet his eyes. "You're safe, I promise."

All the air left his lungs. "Answer my question, Rafe."

"I'm not gonna hurt you."

He wanted to kick him in the face, but he couldn't quite reach. The room was starting to spin. "Answer my question!"

"I think you already know the answer," Rafe replied, resting a hand on his ankle.

Edgar kicked his hand away. "Do not touch me! Get away from me!"

Rafe made an exasperated noise. "I'm not gonna do anything to you! I'm trying to protect you!"

Edgar tried to kick him again, grunting as he missed. "By chaining me up? By kidnapping me like a psychopath? How are you protecting me in any way?"

"You can't get hurt if you're in here," Rafe said with a shrug.

Edgar wanted to strangle him. "Uncuff me now."

Rafe shook his head. "I can't do that." He ran his hand over his buzzcut, exhaling slow. "There's people who want to hurt you."

"Yeah," Edgar scoffed, "I'm looking at one."

He paused, frozen in place, as if he couldn't believe what he'd heard. "I would never hurt you."

Edgar huffed in frustration as he missed another kick. "You shot Sarah. You tried to drown her. You tried to kill Mikey!"

"Mikey was an accident!" he argued, throwing his hands up. "And you're different than them. I care about you."

Edgar stopped kicking in his shock. This was what he defined as care? Locking him up? Scaring the mess out of him? "If you really cared you would let me go."

He shook his head. "No."

"Fine. I'll do it myself then," he said, before beginning to struggle against the grip of the handcuffs.

The metal was unforgiving against his wrists as he thrashed against them. He could feel it, ripping through the top layer of skin, leaving them raw.

"Stop!" Rafe shouted, "What the hell is wrong with you?"

Edgar panted as his right wrist began to bleed. Maybe if he bled enough his hand would slip out.

"Jesus fucking Christ," Rafe mumbled before climbing into the bed. He pinned Edgar down with ease, stopping his movement. He reached into his back pocket and pulled out a tiny key. He sighed before unlocking the cuffs.

Edgar's body went slack against the pillows beneath him as he exhaled in relief.

"Better?" Rafe asked. He nodded. "Don't even fucking think about moving."

Edgar met his eyes, keeping his face blank as he stared. "What'll you do if I try? Shoot me? Strangle me?"

Rafe smiled. "Let's not find out."

[nolanhollogay]

in s3 theres a scene between rafe & edgar with this exchange:

“That's what I like about you, Edgar. You aren't a little bitch like your friends. You'll actually fight back,” he sent him a smile, his eyes gleaming darkly, “You're just like me, you ever think about that?”

Edgar wanted to spit in his face again, but his mouth was dry from fear. "We're nothing alike!”

"Yes,” he tightened his grip and Edgar grunted in frustration, "We are. Think about it. You have a dead sister, my sister's dead to me. Both of our dads are terrible people.”

“That doesn't mean anything!"

“I've seen you with those pogues. Following ‘em around like a scared little rabbit. You want ‘em to like you so bad you'd risk your life for it. I understand that feeling more than anything.”

and, like, rafe is being a weird creep freak asshole but hes right <3

they were both brought up by these intense domineering men who did more harm than good, ward is obviously complicit in rafe's behavior bcuz he clearly ignores and dismisses rafes mental health issues, and pressures him to "make himself useful" feeding into his delusion that if he just does something, anything to help then he'll earn his love and his pride and his affection

edgar's dad was similar in the sense that he would give him love and affection only to immediately snatch it away of edgar did anything that didn't align with his beliefs of how a good child should behave, and how a boy should behave

then theres the sisters of it all, where rafe Knows that sarah is ward's favorite but still believes that he can win that spot, if he does the right thing to protect the family or if he goes as far as to get rid of her, even though theres a part of him deep down that knows his goal is unachievable

edgar on the other hand was always compared to his older sister, lucia, and when she passed away, this stopped, but not to him, in his eyes, she's reached angel status and he'll never be able to get there unless he dies as well, she's untouchable now, unable to be criticized or judged in anyway bcuz you cant speak ill of the dead and you cant taint an angel

and they both just want to be loved so bad to the point of their own ruin, rafe drives himself mad and edgar lets himself get hurt over and over and over and its still not enough for either of them

[nolanhollogay]

#21 - "You're the most precious thing to me. So, I have to keep you as safe as possible." + uou know!

[nodding enthusiastically] i DO know!!!

+

"I'm gonna kill my dad," Rafe announced.

Edgar spit apple juice all over himself, along with the table. Rafe somehow managed to look more endeared than disgusted. "What did you just say?"

"'M gonna ki—"

Edgar lunged across the table, reaching out to cover his mouth. "What is wrong with you?"

Rafe gently grabbed his wrist to move his hand, but kept hold of it. "You asked!"

Edgar pulled his hand away, sitting back in his seat. "Don't say that here," he whispered. "We have company, remember?"

They were in some mom & pop diner for breakfast with Limbrey's henchman in a booth across from them, watching them like hawks. They weren't very good at subtlety.

Rafe looked over his shoulder and sent them a mocking little wave. Edgar kicked his shin to gain his attention again.

"Why would you even do.. that?" he asked. What would he even gain from Ward being dead? He would be the head of the family, sure, but that was a superficial title at best, and a sword waiting to fall on his head at worst. Ward's legacy, all the pain and harm he'd put into the world, would follow him and haunt him until he died, and he had to have known that.

"For you," he said with ease. He reached over and picked a piece of bacon off of Edgar's plate even though he had his own. "You're the most precious thing to me. So, I have to keep you as safe as possible." He took a bite of the bacon, the crunch filling Edgar's stunned silence. "And the only way I can do that, the only way I can guarantee that is if he's..." He made a slicing motion across his neck.

Edgar didn't know what to do with that. "I don't want you to do that. I don't want you to kill someone for me. Especially not your father."

"Sometimes you gotta kill people, angel," Rafe said with a shrug. "God does it all the time. He probably gets a kick out of it too."

Edgar's body locked up. "Don't say that."

Rafe reached out and rested his hand on Edgar's. "Sorry. No disrespect," He picked up Edgar's cup of juice. "'Sides it's not like I don't benefit from him dying too. He'll finally stop breathing down my neck, ya know?"

Edgar looked up to the ceiling. "Señor, por favor, cuida de mí."

[nolanhollogay]

Brontide - The low rumbling of distant thunder. + edgar!

pov: u have a trauma response while stuck in a car with the guy who you hate, who is deeply obsessed with you and two men who want u both dead

+

Edgar had never been claustrophobic, not in any meaningful way, but now, locked in a car with Rafe and two men who wanted to kill them, he was starting to feel it.

It didn't help that he could hear thunder rumbling, getting closer by the minute.

"You look like you're gonna throw up," Rafe said. He glanced at the man in the passenger seat. "Aim for his face."

Edgar gave a weak chuckle, as the man driving snorted in amusement. The other man was not as amused. There was giant gun in his left hand. The sight of it only made Edgar's stomach turn even more.

Rafe's eyebrows knitted together. "What's wrong?"

"I, um, don't like rain," he admitted. As soon as he spoke, the clouds were ripped open and rain drops began to assault the windows. He inhaled sharply. "Oh, cheese and fries."

The driver shot his partner a look. "The hell did he just say?"

Rafe tilted his head, blinking at Edgar in confusion. "Why don't you like rain?"

He blinked, breath getting caught in his throat. Suddenly all he could see was Abuela and Luci in the front seats, singing their hearts out to some song on the radio. He couldn't remember what it was now, not through the fog of his memory.

He could remember the rain, the way it came down in sheets. He felt like the only person in the world as he sat in the backseat. The car was warm with love and the heat from the air conditioner.

Everything happened so fast.

He still wasn't sure what caused them to start sliding. A puddle from the rain, a patch of mud, maybe. All he knew was that one second, they were fine, the next they were sliding and colliding with someone's souped up pickup truck. After that, there was nothing but torn metal and the white walls of the hospital and an emptiness he'd never felt before.

"Edgar," Rafe said, placing a firm hand on his knee. He gasped, coming back to reality.

He blinked again, tears slipping down his cheeks as he struggled to get air into his lungs.

Rafe wiped away a tear with a warm hand. "Hey, you're good. You're okay."

In what could only be a moment of weakness, Edgar grabbed his hand, squeezing hard. "We need to get out of here."

Rafe's face melted into something awestruck before it went hard. "Don't worry, angel. I already have a plan."

[nolanhollogay]

🌹🌹

from edgarafe secret dating au!

Rafe looked down at Edgar's hand that was still resting against him. “That was kinda hot."

Edgar closed his eyes, exhaling through his nose. “Why are you here?"

[nolanhollogay]

hiding face in neck

c'mon even More trauma!!

tw for descriptions of a murder :0

+

Limbrey stood in the center of the room, still just as blonde and regal as when Edgar has last seen her. Ward was beside her, to her left, and the man who had stabbed Edgar was on her right. They looked like a nightmarish trio of PTA parents in their business casual clothing.

"The guy with the crazy eyes," Edgar whispered, making Rafe tilt his head to hear him, "What's his name?"

"Renfield," he replied. "Why?"

Like Dracula's servant, Edgar's mind supplied. "He's the guy who stabbed me."

Rafe tensed, bristling like an angry dog.

If he tried anything, he'd blow their cover. Then this whole scheme would be for nothing, and even worse, they'd probably get killed.

"It's fine," Edgar said, grabbing his wrist, "I'm fine."

Rafe relaxed ever so slightly, but his jaw stayed clenched so hard it had to hurt his teeth.

"I'm fine," Edgar repeated, but it was drowned out by Limbrey calling for the room's attention.

She smiled at the crowd, a collection of rich men and women - and him and Rafe - all dressed like an H&M catalogue. It was kind of disappointing that they all obviously had money but didn't even try to flaunt. They could've at least made their slimeball business tactics worthwhile.

"Thank you all for coming tonight,"she exclaimed, beaming. "It's an honor to have such esteemed members of society in one room, to see something so important."

The "esteemed members of society" gave her a round of applause, and she grinned so wide that her mouth turned sharklike. She cleared her throat, subtly tapping Renfield on the back. Without a word, he left.

"Before we show you what you've all come to see," she began as Renfield came back, wheeling something on a chair. "We have a bit of a demonstration for you."

Edgar frowned as he realized what exactly he was looking at. "That looks like-"

His suspicions were confirmed as Renfield removed the sheet and revealed a man underneath. He was tied to a swivel chair, with duct tape over his mouth. His face was red, tearsoaked, and bruised on his cheekbone.

Edgar gasped at the sight of him as did almost everyone else in the room.

Limbrey continued to smile. "This is Steven, a man we'd hired to guard the cross," she explained, "He'd been doing an excellent job until we overheard him on the phone, telling his wife eveything he'd seen since he started his new job."

Renfield pulled a gun from the holster on his hip, pressed it to Steven's temple.

"No," Edgar whispered. Rafe gripped his arm as he unthinkingly took a step forward.

"It's a shame that he was so excited," Limbrey said with a sigh. Renfield pulled the trigger. As Steven's brains, and his skull, and whatever lived in his head burst out of it, Rafe pulled Edgar against him, hiding him against his neck.

Edgar choked on something that was half sob half gasp, falling into him.

"That is what will happen if any of you speak about the cross outside of this room. Understand?"

[nolanhollogay]

🛑🚫✋🏽nsfw under the cut✋🏽🚫🛑

GAY RIGHTS, GAY WRONGS, BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY GAY SEX

[nolanhollogay]

A kiss while someone watches + dealers choice!!!

feeling evil <3 (also i realized as i was writing this that its just the evil version of this)

+

"Someone is going to see us," was all Mikey heard before he rounded the corner. As soon as he turned, he was rooted to the spot, eyes lazer focused on the scene in front of him.

Hidden in the shadows of the wide Cameron mansion hallway were Edgar and Rafe wrapped around each other, coiled together like snake. Mikey wasn't religious by any means, but he couldn't not think of Eve and the serpent.

Rafe's head dipped down to whisper in Edgar's ear, but Mikey heard him just as clearly as if he'd spoken aloud. "Maybe I want someone to see us."

Mikey's stomach almost leapt out of his mouth.

Rafe had never wanted anyone to see them together. Not even once. He went out of his way to ensure that no one ever saw them together.

"You're so—" Edgar was cut off by Rafe kissing him.

In an instant, they were curling even closer, drawn together like magnets. Rafe tilting Edgar's face in his hands, one hand under his chin as if he was something delicate, another around his throat. Edgar was gripping his shirt, like he needed something to steady him.

Mikey had never been kissed like that, especially not by Rafe. He'd never been wanted so desperately.

He was gonna puke all over his shoes if he kept watching. Forcing his eyes away, he turned on his heel and left them in the shadows.