#episodes : 1x01 / 1x07 / 1x08

[poirott]

AGATHA CHRISTIE'S POIROT (1989-2013) 1 gif per episode | SEASON 1

[confused-pyramid]

Coming Up For Air | s1

pairing: aaron hotchner x childhood bsf!reader

summary: Hotch and his childhood best friend working together at the BAU: a slow burn across the seasons.

word count: 10.4k

warnings: canon!typical violence, mentions of abuse, death of a spouse, slow slow slow burn, specific episodes mentioned in this part are 1x01, 1x06, 1x07, 1x08, 1x15, 1x16, and 1x22

a/n: I started rewatching Criminal Minds from the beginning, and this is what came out of it heh. This is the first part in a little series I'm starting that follows Hotch and his childhood best friend in the BAU, beginning with the pilot. If all goes well, this will continue through the rest of the show, with ~1 part per season :) Title is from Coming up for air by Signals in Smoke

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You haven't used your oven in over a year. It's not that you don't like cooking - because you do - you just haven't had the time. If you could, you would blame it on the extra hours you have had to put in after starting at the BAU, but that wouldn't be fair. Your transfer to the unit was the only thing that got you through his death at all.

After your husband was shot and killed in action while tailing a kingpin of one of the New York mobs, you couldn't bear to be in this house at all. You had gone back home to stay with your father for a couple of months, but eventually you had to get back to your real life. With a month remaining on your bureau-mandated leave, you returned to the home you had shared, before one of the lower-level mob soldiers misfired -

You didn't let yourself think about it for almost a year, but time heals all wounds. The poets were right. At least you hope they are.

Even back at home, you still couldn't bear to be there alone, other than when you were sleeping. That's why your peloton was gathering dust and your kitchen went untouched, until just now.

So, of course, the call from the office comes when you're making dinner. It takes five minutes to change into slacks and a button-up, and two more to toss your half-cooked vegetables in the trash, before driving down to headquarters.

A fourth girl has been taken in Seattle, and the local PD only now decided to invite your team. You know the BAU isn't well-liked by the other departments, but that doesn't mean you aren't effective.

When you enter the building, you rush through the I.D. check and jog over to the lecture hall, where Morgan and Reid are standing outside of a neighboring office like children waiting for their father to come and get them.

Shooting them both a thin-lipped smile, you step inside just as they finish discussing the unsub's pattern.

"They want you back in the saddle," Hotch says to the man beside him after greeting you with a nod.

Your eyes are so immediately drawn to Hotch that it takes you a moment to realize that you recognize the man standing next to him. You haven't seen him since the day you were assigned to the BAU, mostly because you were technically transferred to this unit because of his extended leave.

What was supposed to be one month became six, before Hotch informed you that your temporary placement would be permanent, if you were willing to stay in Virginia.

It was a no-brainer.

You turn your gaze to Jason Gideon as everyone in the room stares at him expectantly. He looks self-assured, but you're sure the confidence is a front. "They sure they want me?"

"The order came from the director," Hotch says simply.

"Well," Gideon states, "we'd better get started, then."

Hotch glances over at you as everyone files out of the room and you raise your eyebrows momentarily, a quick check-in between the two of you. He nods imperceptibly and it's enough for now. He didn't tell you Gideon was coming back today, but now isn't the time to give him hell for that.

***

Hotch is the last to board the plane, and he takes his usual seat beside you, this time in the aisle, a few rows away from the rest of the team.

"I was going to tell you," he says as soon as you close the case file in your hands. "The section chief wants me to evaluate him to see if he's ready to return to the team."

"That's a lot of pressure." They have to know that Gideon will be able to smell him out within the day. "You sure it won't get in the way?"

Hotch makes that face you hate, the one that says he knows you're deflecting. "I was going to tell you."

It doesn't take much for you to forgive him. It helps that you trust him completely, especially after everything he has done for you.

"Still," you smile, bumping his shoulder with yours, "it would have been nice to know about the sudden change to my job security."

You're mostly joking, but his frown is genuine. "Don't be silly. You'll always have a place on this team."

He takes everything so seriously these days. You suppose it's only fair, given the files he has to sort through on a daily basis. Picking which case deserves the team's attention the most.

But he wasn't always like this. You're the newest member of the team, but you've known Hotch longer than any of them.

You still remember the first time you met him, at eight years old. He was your first real friend at school, and you became inseparable easily. Your shared love for The Beatles and Law and Order made you fast friends, and as you grew older, your interests shifted in tandem.

Sometimes when you look at him, you still see that little boy who knew too much, but still managed to always make you laugh.

***

The team disperses soon after you land in Seattle. You've never had to come up with a profile in one afternoon, but it's also been a long time since your ticking clock to find the victim was just over a day.

When Gideon and Morgan head to the latest crime scene, you join Hotch and Reid to interview the victim's brother. The moment the three of you step into his house, his dog, Sandy, starts barking up a storm.

"It's what we call the Reid effect," Hotch smiles, walking over to pet her. "Happens with children, too."

You can't help but smile as well, peering over at Spencer, who looks about as uncomfortable as he usually does.

It doesn't escape your notice that the brother looks looser now. Hotch has a way with people that traces back to his childhood self. He was always wiser than his years, something you chalk up to his need to grow up faster than he should have, but his paternal instinct comes from practically raising his brother, Sean, after his dad's untimely death.

The casual interview reveals enough about the victimology that when you head back to the station, Gideon calls the officers in to explain the profile.

You can feel Morgan's agitation wafting off of him as he watches Gideon state his assumptions with startling clarity and confidence. Hotch, on the other hand, looks contemplative, which reminds you that he's been tasked with the returning agent's evaluation.

He can see your furtive glances in his direction, even as you try to remain secretive about your interest in his demeanor. He presses his lips together to keep from smiling as he thinks about how lucky you are that you went into profiling and not covert operations.

You have never been especially good at keeping your own thoughts or intentions to yourself around him. While some would call that a weakness in this field, he sees it as your greatest strength, because it clearly shows how much he can trust you.

As a kid, you were outspoken about every idea you had, and you used your strength and willpower to look out for him when he needed it. It took him a long time to admit how much he used to need you (maybe too long), but you always knew.

***

Gideon's profile leads to the arrest of Richard Slessman and Tim Vogel, and Elle manages to save the last girl while she's still alive. You catch your breath for the first time in 36 hours as you stand with Hotch in the shipyard, watching the paramedics and local police clear the scene.

"What are you going to tell them?" you ask under your breath as his gaze turns to Gideon, who is getting patched up in the back of an ambulance.

He had goaded the unsub into shooting him instead of the girl, but your mind can't seem to focus on the silver lining.

Hotch sighs, crossing his arms over his chest, as though to hold his coat closed against the breeze. "They want to know if he's fit to be a field agent again."

Normally, you would give him shit for using that tactic. Avoiding a question by providing more information. This time, you know he's just thinking out loud.

"What would you say?" Hotch asks as Morgan walks over and sits on a barrel next to you.

"Gideon saved her life," Derek shrugs, his eyes flashing to you for a moment. "That's good enough for me."

Hotch seems to ponder this for a second. "Do you know what Gideon means in Hebrew?"

"Mighty warrior," Reid interjects, popping in to the conversation with the subtlety of a tiger.

You're confused at first, but then you remember the baby names book that was sitting in Hotch's living room the last time you visited him. "You cannot let Haley name your child Gideon."

Hotch laughs suddenly, and you can tell you surprised it out of him. Your chest warms comfortably as he smiles, his cheeks flushing softly in the chill air.

He looks over at Gideon again, deciding in real time that he's going to recommend him to come back to the team. He would never admit it to you or anyone, but he knows that if your position on the team was in jeopardy from Gideon's return, he wouldn't have been able to complete his evaluation fairly.

It was Hotch who recommended you for the open position after he was promoted into Gideon's role as unit chief. You deserved the spot, of course, but Jeff's death had still been fresh and he knew better than most how much the job can take one's mind off of the other aspects of their life.

While Hotch watches Gideon, you watch him. You can tell from the look on his face that it's a done deal. Jason's coming back to the team. It will be a change of pace for everyone, but that doesn't mean it won't be good.

Having joined the team right after the bombing, you saw exactly how Gideon changed after getting the profile wrong, but so did everyone else. What people didn't talk about was how Aaron changed too. Rising into the rank. Growing to fill the hole that Gideon left in the unit, but somehow also shrinking into himself at the same time, because that's what this job does to you...it takes and it takes and it takes until you have nothing left to give.

But sometimes that's what you need: to give something up so you know you aren't losing everything.

***

Gideon settles into the team faster than you anticipated, and soon it's almost like he never left. Even though you can see the vein on Morgan's neck pulsate every time he hijacks a profile, you can't help but appreciate the support he gives to Spencer and Elle, both of whom are becoming incredible profilers before your very eyes.

That's also why you find yourself a little worried when Hotch tells you that Reid failed his weapons recertification.

"I thought you said you were helping him practice," you say as the two of you walk past security and toward the bullpen.

"I was," he emphasizes, before correcting himself, "I did. I'm sure he was just nervous."

You nod, pushing open the doors and spotting Reid sitting quietly at his desk. "He can test again in two weeks. He'll be fine."

When Morgan hands him a whistle with a quippy joke, you sigh into your coffee tumbler, but don't bother stepping in. He's being childish, but if you try to intervene, it'll just embarrass Spencer more.

"Okay," JJ starts, "Franklin Park, Des Plaines. Yesterday afternoon."

She dives into the case, but you have already read the file (and you know Reid has too) so you scoot your chair over to his desk and lean forward so only he can hear you. "I failed my first weapons certification at the bureau too."

Spencer looks up immediately, his face colored with surprise. "Really? You're one of the best shots I know."

You smile with a shrug. "The tests aren't real life. When it comes down to it, I get the job done. Just like you will."

He doesn't say anything for a moment, but then his lips curve up into a small smile. You both turn your attention back to the front just as JJ finishes explaining the case details.

"Wheels up in 30."

The flight to Illinois is filled with heated discussions about the bureau's fruitless history of trying to profile long distance serial killers.

"L. D. S. K.s are so rare, we haven't been able to build a standard profile," Hotch explains as the jet reaches cruising altitude.

Gideon chimes in immediately. "Here's what we do know: they're always male, and they frequently have law enforcement or military experience, and they always contact the police or the media."

Elle looks confused and you echo her sentiment as you lean your hip against her armrest. "To take credit or relive the experience?"

"Both," he says simply. "All serial killers attempt to relive the ecstasy they get from their killings. Some use souvenirs taken from the victims, and others return to the dump site to interact with the body. Both modes require contact with the victim, contact which, by definition, long distance serial killers don't have."

"Our unsub hasn't contacted anybody," you point out. "What do we do until then?"

"Sometimes it's not what the unsub does that reveals the profile. Sometimes it is what they do not do."

Reid glances up from the file in his lap, and you notice that he looks at Gideon first. "He doesn't kill his victims."

"Underkill's a unique signature," Hotch ponders, standing up and walking along the cabin. He only paces when he's deep in thought. "The question is, does he shoot them in the stomach intentionally just to wound them, or is he just aiming at the biggest part of the target?"

The team is silent as you take in this new analysis. You're not surprised when Gideon is the first to speak up. "Specifically, does the unsub lack the skill to make the head shot, or simply the will to take it?"

When the plane lands, you check out the last crime scene before spending the day talking to the local police and the victims' surgeons at the nearby hospital.

That night, when you check into your hotel room, the click of the door lock closing behind you is a welcome relief from the tension of the day. Many of the Des Plaines police officers were unhappy with the team's initial assessment, because it heavily implied that the unsub may have been a law enforcement official himself.

You wash your face and change into a tee shirt and a comfortable pair of sweatpants, before climbing into bed and opening the case file back up again. The rest of the team has also gone to their own rooms, but you can't help but wish you had another set of eyes looking at this with you.

As though reading your mind, a knock thuds on your door and you stand up quickly, in case it's an emergency. When you check the peephole, you see Hotch standing way too close to the door.

Unlocking it slowly so you don't startle him, you open the door to find him in still in a full suit.

"Is there a problem?" you ask immediately. "Do I need to get dressed?"

He shakes his head, glancing around the hallway so quickly that you almost miss it. "I was just looking over the profile and I wanted your opinion on some thoughts I had."

The corner of your mouth twitches and you open the door further to let him in. He doesn't miss a beat as he takes a seat on the armchair in front of your bed and flips open his notepad.

"I was thinking about the bullet we recovered on the scene," he says slowly, like he's thinking through every word he's saying.

You nod, sitting on top of the bed covers and crossing your legs under you. "Garcia called after you left the station. The bullet was a .223 fired from the M-4 variant of the M-16."

"That means he's military," Hotch says, reaching his hand out without taking his eyes off his notepad. You close the case file you had laid out and hand it to him. "M-4 is a shorter barrel than the M-16, so it's less accurate and a lot harder to fire, especially at these distances."

"This level of skill indicates specialized training. That means..."

"It means the underkill was on purpose," Hotch says, finishing your thought. "What is he trying to prove?"

You purse your lips as he sits up in the chair to give himself room to remove his jacket. His pinstriped button-down is slightly crinkled under his arms, but you can tell it was freshly ironed this morning.

"Maybe he's in a fast-paced occupation," you suggest, "which would fit with the profile that he has a big ego."

"Then we're back to law enforcement."

You lean forward, your eyes following his hands as they fidget with his cuffs and undo the buttons, one at a time. You've always been attune to every one of his movements, but maybe it's just because you've spent so much time around him.

"Hotch," you whisper-yell, snagging his attention from your case file, which he tosses back to you.

He hums and you take that as an invitation to continue speaking. "Be careful tomorrow, when you're giving the profile."

One of his eyebrows lifts and you can tell he's holding back a smile. "It's just in front of the Des Planes PD. You'll be there too."

"It's not that," you sigh, shaking your head. "Everything about this profile points to the shooter being either current or former law enforcement. I'd be surprised if they didn't take it personally."

His eyes flit up to yours, his brow furrowing. "I can handle myself."

"I'm sure you can, Hotch," you say with a breathy laugh. "Doesn't mean I don't still look out for you."

He pauses and it's like his whole body takes a beat. "I know."

***

You're talking to Dr. Landman with Derek, Elle, and Jason the next day when a gunshot rings out through the hospital. Last you checked, Hotch and Reid were in the E.R., but you haven't heard from them since you arrived.

"It's Phillip Dowd," a nurse informs you when you meet with local police outside the closed E.R. door.

After a quick call to Penelope, the profile becomes clear.

"He joined the army at 18," Gideon recites, pacing around the room in a vaguely reminiscent manner, "went to ranger school, did 6 years before being dishonorably discharged in '95 for conduct unbecoming. Obviously lied about it, joined the Arlington P. D."

"You were right," the police captain sighs. "He was a cop."

His hopeless tone is disheartening, and you find yourself upset for not the first time that your team was correct in their assessment.

After the initial commotion, the E.R. is silent except for a few muffled voices. You can't hear what's being said, but the lack of gunshots or loud noises is all that's keeping you from falling apart.

"It'll be okay," you hear whispered from next to you. You turn to see Derek, who presses his shoulder to yours briefly. "Hotch will know what to do."

You know there's nothing you can do from out here, especially with how precarious the situation inside is, but doing nothing has never been your strong suit.

"I know," you tell him, echoing your thoughts. "I just wish we could help."

Derek cocks his head at the S.W.A.T. team readying themselves to break the door down. "We can help. We need to give Hotch and the kid time to wear Dowd down."

His tone is light and you feel yourself laugh, ignoring the thickness that swells in your throat. "That shouldn't take long."

Derek bumps your arm again in a silent extension of comfort, and you mouth a silent thank you.

You can feel Gideon losing patience as he reasons with the captain, but he eventually buys them three minutes to do what they can. When the final five second countdown starts, you unconsciously hold your breath, only to be released when Hotch's voice calls through the door.

"Hold your fire!"

Your breath comes out like a gasp and you squeeze Derek's arm before rushing forward. Hotch stumbles past you with a murmur that sounds obscurely like "help Reid", so you push your way through the throng of civilians moving to escape until you see him.

"Spencer," you gasp, crouching down to help him into a standing position. You would never admit it to him, but ever since he joined the team, he's been something of a little brother to you. "What happened in here? Are you okay?"

"You were right," he says with a surprising steadiness to his voice. "I got the job done."

You don't ask what he means, knowing that Hotch will fill you in when the time is right. Instead, you decide not to fight the vaguely maternal urge rising within you and you pull him into a tight hug. It's more of a quick squeeze, because you don't want to push past his physical boundaries, but he doesn't complain, instead looking over at you with a small smile that's more than enough for now.

***

You find Hotch where the departed ambulance that patched Reid up was parked. All of the hustle and bustle of the paramedics and local police officers and bureau agents comes to a standstill as you walk over to where he's sitting on the edge of the curb.

"I heard what happened," you say as a way to announce your presence. "Can I sit?"

He nods without looking up, and you crouch down next to him, settling on the curb with your shoulder pressed to his. You can feel the tension in his muscles as he grips the sidewalk, his palms digging into the concrete like he could break through if he pressed hard enough. "Reid.."

"..is fine," you whisper, nudging him so he looks up to where Spencer and Jason are chattering excitedly. "He's more proud than anything."

He doesn't say anything, so you bump your knee against his. "I guess all of the physical training classes you made him take at the academy paid off."

He knows you know exactly what is running through his mind, so he doesn't bother trying to articulate it. Instead, he lets out the breath he didn't realize he was holding, and looks over at you. "Do you remember that self-defense class we took before law school?"

You're not expecting this question, and you almost laugh. "You mean the singular self-defense class you dragged me to before dawn in the summer before we started at Georgetown?"

He levels you with a look that you would think is serious if you didn't know him so well. "You don't regret it, though."

"No," you smile, your eyes blurring with emotion. That's where you met Jeff. "I don't."

He was your instructor that day. He only taught that class twice a week, between lectures at Georgetown Law, and it doesn't escape your mind that you so easily could've missed him. One day earlier or later and you never would've met him, never would've been his girlfriend, or his wife, or his widow.

Hotch remembers meeting him that day too. He had to literally come to your apartment and drag you out of bed to make the seven AM class that he had signed you both up for, and you had been grumpy the whole drive over.

There wasn't much, other than coffee, that could get you alert before eight in the morning, but the moment you walked into that gym, it was like you were wide awake. He spent the rest of the class trying not to look as the man he would later come to know as Agent Adler kept coming over to give you extra pointers, and he pretended that the coil of ice slithering up his spine was there just because he was watching out for you.

When he found out the two of you had started dating, he continued to pretend the nausea rising in his stomach was from the day-old sandwich he had had for lunch, because it wasn't fair. Especially since he was with Haley, and he was happier than he had ever been, even if the new law school course load was making it harder to see her as often as he wanted to.

But eventually, your happiness with him overpowered every protective urge he felt, and he realized that even if there was a feeling in his gut that he didn't recognize when he saw you two together, Jeff was perfectly suited for you.

***

"He's so gorgeous!" JJ coos, her hands twitching at her sides like she's trying not to reach forward and take the baby out of Haley's hands.

She brought Jack, their newborn son, in to work today to show the team, and Hotch looks prouder than you've ever seen him. "Thank you."

"If you find baldness and wrinkles attractive."

"Reid!" you chastise, swatting at him. He dodges your hands without even looking.

"Look at his widdy biddy nose," Garcia squeals, before turning to Morgan with an inquisitive look. "Don't you want one of these?"

He just laughs as he rests his chin on her shoulder. "Mm, I'll stick to practicing."

"Congratulations," Elle chimes in before returning to Gideon's side to continue discussing the new case that came in. She's always on top of things, and it's something you respect greatly about her.

"Thanks," Hotch smiles, his gaze returning to Jack after looking away for only a moment. Jack is like a siren, the way each of his little sounds or movements holds Hotch's attention so steadily. He's the most focused of all of you, but you've still never seen him this enamored. "She's amazing. I'm a little terrified."

"You're glowing," you tell Haley as the rest of the team heads to the briefing room. "How is it that you had a baby just a few weeks ago?"

"You're sweet," she smiles, before tilting her head forward. "Do you want to hold him? You're practically his aunt."

You gasp quietly, so as not to wake little Jack. "That is a title I will carry proudly. And yes, I would love to hold him."

Haley hands him to you slowly, and you make sure to support his head carefully as you cup your arms around him. He looks so much like Haley that you almost make a joke about Hotch's genes not even putting up a fight, but that nose...that nose has Hotch written all over it.

When you glance back to where the team left from, you see him turn back at the same moment and offer you an encouraging smile.

"How are you holding up?" you ask Haley, barely able to focus on your surroundings with a newborn in your arms. Maybe there is something to the siren thing.

"Jack's been incredible. He barely cries, it's kind of a godsend...but I do wish Aaron could take time off with me."

You give her what you hope is your most comforting smile. "We've been super swamped with cases here, but in all my years working with him, I have never seen him so eager to leave every night."

She laughs, a pretty sound you remember from your youth. "I know. I feel so unfair when I complain about these things, but I appreciate you humoring me."

"Not at all," you assure her, glancing back down at Jack, who is mid-yawn. "I understand completely. If I had one of these little guys, I wouldn't be able to think about anything else."

You hear her breath catch and you open your mouth to reassure her that it's fine, but she is already reaching forward to squeeze your arm. "You and Jeff would have made amazing parents."

When you both joined the bureau, you were so busy with work that kids weren't on your mind at all. It wasn't until you got settled at the BAU, and Jeff found his place with organized crime, that you even started talking about it.

You want kids, don't you?

Only a few. Maybe four or five. Yeah, five's a good number.

"I should get back to the team," you say softly, blinking away the memories.

Haley sees your face and she smiles sadly as she takes Jack back from your arms. "I'll see you soon. Tell him I'm heading home, will you?"

You nod and watch the elevator doors close in front of her, before joining the team.

***

"I can't believe you went bar hopping without me," Derek shakes his head, feigning offense as he leans so far back in his chair you're afraid it may tip over.

"I think hopping is kind of a strong word," you say, glancing over at Elle, who is perched on the edge of your desk. "We only had one bar in mind, but it closed earlier than we thought, so we went somewhere else after."

"This was a much needed girl's night," Elle grins, patting Morgan on the shoulder as he continues to pout. "We'll invite you next time."

"How was your weekend, Dr. Reid?" you ask, turning around to face him.

Spencer doesn't look up from his crossword.

You say his name again, recalling the attention of Derek and Elle, who had started talking about some trip they've been planning for what feels like months.

When he still doesn't look up, you pick up one of the BAU-provided pens on your desk and chuck it at him, just hard enough to bridge the gap between your desks, but not so hard that it hurts on impact.

"Ow!" Spencer yelps anyway, glancing up with a look that's somewhere between confusion and indignation. He picks the pen up off the ground and turns it over to see the tiny insignia on the cap. "This is FBI property."

"How was your weekend, Spencer?" you ask again, ignoring him. "Didn't you say you had some fun stuff planned?"

"I did," he lights up, instantly forgetting about the pen incident. "My local movie theater was showing reruns of the first season of the original Star Trek, so I got to experience it on the big screen."

Derek laughs and walks back over to his desk next to yours. "We have very different definitions of fun weekend plans, kid."

You're about to tell Derek that no one wants to hear what his idea of fun is when the office door upstairs flies open and Hotch and Gideon walk out.

Reid hands you back your pen, and Derek sits up in his chair so fast it's almost comical.

"We have another case," Hotch announces before coming to a stop.

Gideon takes it away. "Our unsub is male, intelligent, organized and methodical. He has the confidence of a man who's been killing for a long time."

"Only victim removed from the scene is Freddy Condore indicating some tie to him."

Hotch turns to you. "You, Elle, and Reid stay on Condore's background with Garcia. The rest of us will head to the crime scene."

You nod before standing up. "Let's go, kids."

Penelope's lair is just as eccentric as you remember it.

"Take a seat," she instructs before logging into her computer and opening up her criminal history database. "Just don't get too comfortable."

Your lips quirk up as Elle flashes her eyes at you, and you nod your head at the empty chair on Garcia's opposite side. Reid is already sitting on a desk chair by the back, spinning in aimless circles as he rattles off a list of markers to search for.

After a minute, Penelope stops typing. "Credit card receipts show Freddy loved crab cakes, preferred light beer and used to spend his Thursday nights with a woman in Fells Point."

You pick up a stress toy shaped like a tomato from one of her shelves and bounce it in your palm, just for something to occupy your hands.

"What about his associates?" Elle asks, grabbing a pen with a pom-pom on the end and poking it at Spencer's knee.

"Most of them have criminal records."

Elle glances up. "That much I guessed."

Penelope frowns, and looks pointedly at the pen in her hand.

"She's holding the tomato!" Elle complains, throwing a finger at you.

You lift up your hands in surrender, dropping the stress toy. "Thanks a lot, Greenaway."

"Anyway," Reid interrupts, to everyone's surprise, "One of these guys is particularly interesting. Pull up James Baker's rap sheet."

Penelope turns back to her computer as Spencer reads over her shoulder. "He spent time in juvenile detention for attempted murder, was released at age 21, and then subsequently arrested for, and this is in order, armed robbery, petty theft, burglary, narcotics sales, and rapе."

"What's so interesting about that?"

"When it comes to psychological behavior, anything is possible but this criminal history? It just isn't probable."

Elle nods in agreement. "I mean, as a minor, he began with attempted murder and then devolved into pettier crimes?"

"It's the criminal history of a fractured schizophrenic with multiple personality disorder," you sigh. "It just does not make sense."

***

Hotch calls you into his office when he and Morgan return from Baker's address. You can tell something is off before you even step through the door, so you shut it behind you and take a seat in front of his desk.

"What's going on?" you ask, your eyes glancing over his face to see if his micro-expressions can give you a hint. "What's wrong?"

He looks up with a sigh, his hands clasped on his desk. "Baker's place was an artificial dwelling, and the weapon we recovered on the scene was standard law enforcement issue."

It takes you a few seconds to comprehend what he's trying to say - a few seconds longer than usual - and your breath stutters in your throat. "He was undercover?"

"That's what it looks like," Hotch agrees. "I wanted to inform you before telling the rest of the team."

You nod, pressing your eyes closed for a beat.

He missed his pick-up, Mrs. Adler.

We'll call you as soon as we know more.

The memories start to flood back in and you squeeze your eyes shut tighter before opening them. Hotch looks blurry for a moment until your eyes adjust to the light again.

"Does organized crime know where he is?" you ask, desperately needing to fill the silence.

He looks down at the case file. "We assume so, but it's not like they would tell us. They weren't too happy that we were taking on this case at all, and now we know why."

"Maybe they'll talk to me," you suggest, even though the idea of talking to Josh Cramer makes you taste bile. You haven't seen him since a month after the funeral. It's not for his lack of trying, you just couldn't stomach looking at any of them after what happened. One missed call turned to ten and eventually they stopped trying.

There's a piercing pain behind your eyes and you squeeze them shut for a momentary relief. "It was only supposed to be three months."

Hotch's brow furrows and you don't look up at him just yet. You can already picture his expression, the anguish you know he feels for you whenever you bring up Jeff.

"It was a three month operation," you continue, knowing you won't be able to discuss it later if you stop talking now. "That's all we signed up for. Three months away from me and then he was on leave for the rest of the year, so that we could focus on us again. Maybe even start a family."

Your voice cracks on the last word and you tilt your head down to hide your face. He hates it when you cry, but that's not fair. He knows how important it is to get your emotions out, so they don't pile up inside of you, but if he had his way, you would never have had a reason to cry in the first place.

"I hadn't seen him in over a month when he was..."

He can hear the tightness in your voice and he resists the overwhelming urge to reach his hand out and take yours. You're sitting a foot back from the desk, and it's not he could reach you from here anyway, but his fingers still ache.

"I don't want to blame them, Aaron," you sigh. Your words sound watery, and he pulls a handkerchief out of his inside jacket pocket and hands it to you. He's almost surprised when you accept the gesture, pressing the cloth square under your eyes to catch the tears leaking out. You were so self-reliant as a kid, never wanting or needing anyone else's help. "I don't want to blame them, but I do. I can't help it, I just do."

Someone else would have consoled you. They would have assured you that feeling this way was natural, and that no one could blame you for feeling what you do, but that isn't who you two are. "Jeff wouldn't."

His name is like a dagger to your heart. You practically wince as Hotch digs further. "That team was his family, just like we are yours. He wouldn't blame them, not for this. Not for something he chose."

Something he chose. This is why you don't let yourself remember that day. This is why you kept that day - the day you got that horrible call - locked up inside your brain, where not even you could reach it. Because if you let yourself think about it and remember, then you will remember that it wasn't really Cramer or his unit or the bureau that you blamed. It was him.

For choosing to miss his pick-up. For choosing to go undercover. For choosing to join organized crime.

You take a deep breath and re-adjust yourself in the uncomfortable chair Hotch refuses to replace, even though it's literally splitting at the seams. Something about your tax dollars hard at work. "What are you going to do about Baker?"

He lets you change the subject. "We have to contact Agent Cramer before-

"What the hell is wrong with you people?"

Speak of the devil and he shall appear.

"Sorry?" Hotch frowns, both of you standing up immediately.

Cramer doesn't take his eyes off Hotch as he seethes with anger. "I told you, this is my case! You ran my agent through IBIS?"

"Because I wanted to know who he worked for and now that I do, I'd like to talk to him."

"You don't have him?"

You can hear your heartbeat in your skull.

Hotch looks at you then, and finally Cramer notices your presence. "Y/N...it's been a while."

Your lips press into a thin line. "Almost two years." The anger you've been trying to avoid seeps into your voice against your will and you sigh, returning to the investigation. "How long has Baker been missing?"

"About 12 hours."

"You think he ran?" you ask, watching Cramer closely as his jaw ticks.

"No, Jimmy's too experienced to run without contact."

He realizes his misstep immediately and his shoulders fall. To his credit, he doesn't break eye contact, even as his expression softens. "That's not what I meant. All I'm saying is that I think someone's keeping Jimmy from calling in."

You can feel Aaron looking at you, but you avoid his line of sight. If you're going to have to interact with organized crime, you might as well make yourself useful. "We all want the same thing, Cramer: to get Baker back to his family."

You wait outside as he explains the situation in more detail to Hotch and Gideon, and you're surprised when he's the first to leave. "Can we talk?"

Hotch comes out behind him and raises his eyebrow for a fraction of a second, a check-in. Swallowing thickly, you nod your head and follow him down the hall to the top of the stairs.

"I'm sorry I haven't reached out recently," he says as soon as you're out of earshot of the others. "You know Jeff was one of our top guys."

Your eyes shut at his name, as though someone clapped their hands too close to your face. It's almost laughable how sure you were that you were past your grief. You passed the bureau's psych evaluation after your six month leave with flying colors (because your team practically wrote the answers yourselves), and as each new day passed and you weren't so debilitated by just the thought of him, you thought it meant you were fine. Because time heals all wounds. At least it's supposed to.

"I know," you whisper scratchily, before clearing your throat. "I know that. And it's okay. We've all been busy." You look down at the bustling bullpen where his agents are interacting with your team. "Clearly."

Then you remember you're job here in the first place. "We really are just trying to help. It wouldn't hurt to keep us involved."

Cramer sighs and you know he won't refuse. "We'll loop you in."

***

James Baker is found and Vincent Perotta gets taken into custody, but you can still hear the end of the interrogation ringing in your ears.

"You were just responding to what you learned, Vincent.

When you grow up in an environment like that, an extremely abusive and violent household... it's not surprising that some people grow up to become killers.

And some people grow up to catch them."

You can't pinpoint exactly what you're feeling, but if you had to guess, it would be sorrow. Sorrow for that little boy who got dealt the worst hand you can imagine, and still turned into the best version of who he could've been.

Hotch can't get the interrogation out of his mind either. He had grabbed his briefcase and headed out to the elevators as soon as Perotta was taken away, in the hopes of avoiding everybody. He's about to let out his breath when a hand reaches between the doors and sends them flying open again.

Normally your appearance is a welcome sight, but tonight, he's had enough talking. Perotta took everything he had to give, and then some, and he doesn't know if he has the strength to go through the proceedings again with you.

"I just want to get home," he says as you stand next to him without a word and face the doors. To my family.

You don't say anything as the little fluorescent floor number ticks down - has it always been this slow - and he feels his nerves tighten with agitation. You're never silent, especially not about something like this.

Just before the elevator reaches the second floor, you reach forward and pull the emergency stop button. He whispers your name, half irritated half relieved, and you step in front of him, focusing your eyes on his. It's a classic profiler technique, both to mentally establish trust and to physically block him from the keypad.

"You're a great father, Aaron."

His mind flashes back 25 years, but he squeezes the hand in his pocket into a fist to keep himself from succumbing to the memories. "I'm trying."

He knows what you're doing, and he would normally be open to a healthy exchange between two adults, but tonight he just can't. It's too fresh.

You seem to understand at least a fraction of what he's trying to convey. Your next words are gentle. "That already makes you a thousand times better than him."

That almost makes him smile. "You can say his name, you know."

You shrug, looking at him with a glint in your eye. "Honestly, I don't think I can. I'm afraid I'll turn into a pile of ash, with the fury your father instills in me."

That's what gets him. He coughs out a laugh that echoes around the elevator, and you return to his side, giving him a moment to breathe on his own.

This time, when his mind spirals back to his childhood, he's not as equipped to block it. The memories come in flashes, a blackening bruise on his abdomen, a split lip explained away through roughhousing in the backyard, the thin scars on his hands and elbows as he finally started to fight back. He would've taken it all forever if he had to, if it meant that he could keep the horrors away from the people he loved. "I really should go."

"Yeah." You push the emergency stop back into place and the elevator hits the ground floor in no time. "I'll see you tomorrow, Hotch."

He steps out, half expecting you to follow him. Instead, the doors close and he's by himself again, and he suddenly can't remember why he wanted to be alone in the first place.

***

When the Keystone Killer is finally caught after 18 years of inactivity, he finds himself expecting for there to be some sort of celebration, either in the form of a commendation, or a much-needed break. Instead, what he gets is a mountain of paperwork.

He usually doesn't mind the paperwork that comes after a long case. It's a helpful way for him to sort through his thoughts on what went down, and to learn from mistakes that were made along the way, whether in the profile or in the capture of the unsub.

Lately, paperwork has felt like an added torture to the long hours he already spends at work. It's not that he wasn't excited about going home before, but ever since Jack was born, he hasn't been able to get out of the office fast enough. But being the unit chief of the BAU has its responsibilities, and this is one of them.

He's drowning in consultation files and case reports when you knock on his door, two coffees in hand.

"Thought that was you," he says, finishing the sentence he was writing.

You frown, setting one steaming cup down on his desk. He hasn't even looked up yet. "How'd you know? Or do you just say that to everyone who walks in here?"

His lip twitches and he puts his pen down. "I could smell the coffee. It always smells the same when you make it."

"Oh?" You weren't aware you had a method. "And how's that?"

"Burnt."

You take the lid off your cup and chuck it at him with surprising accuracy. It would have thwacked him in the forehead if he hadn't swatted it aside with his stupid catlike reflexes.

"What are you working on?" you ask after taking a scalding sip of perfectly brewed coffee.

He looks up for a beat before diving back into the file he was skimming. "Paperwork for the Keystone Killer case."

"But we just finished that," you point out before reaching forward and taking the file out from under his nose.

He huffs. "I was...looking at that."

"This is a report on what happened a couple of hours ago," you say, ignoring his remark. "You can easily do this tomorrow, or later this week."

"It's fresh in my mind now. I don't want to forget any details."

You shrug in a motion that says 'fair enough'. "Or, you could actually go home before midnight for once."

You slide another file off the top of his pile and flip it open, reading over the notes Hotch has scribbled in the margins. He's so meticulous about his job that you almost forget he was promoted just a little over a year ago. He became unit chief at the same time that you joined the team, so you didn't get to see him in his early days, but looking at him now, you almost can't imagine it. It's like he's built for this, for taking responsibility and leading people with kindness and respect.

"Elle said something on the plane today," he says suddenly, jerking you from your thoughts.

You close the file and look up as he runs a hand over his head, pushing his thick hair back just for it to bounce forward again. "She said that she's scared she's going to look up and see that her life has passed her by while she was chasing monsters."

Something cold runs through your veins and you sit up straighter in your chair. "And what did you say?"

"I told her the truth."

You smile in an effort to keep your eyes from shining. "What, that we're all doomed?"

He looks at you candidly. "That this job will eat you up if you let it." Your smile falls and he continues. "You just can't let it."

"I'm sure Elle loved hearing that."

He shrugs. "She was surprisingly receptive."

That gets a laugh out of you, even if the good humor doesn't last long. "I don't know how you do it."

"Do what?"

"This job, while also being a husband, and a father." You sigh, and you can almost feel the weight of the air as it leaves your body. "When I go home, I don't have to be anything to anyone. Most of the time it feels awful, but sometimes, after an especially bad case, I'm almost relieved when I can go home and just check out."

You aren't talking about him anymore, and he can tell. He doesn't mind, if this is what it will take for you to work through your emotions.

"We were gonna start trying for a baby."

That surprises him. Not that you wanted to be a mother - he knows that - but that he didn't know you were already thinking about it, especially because of how you grew up. You don't talk about it often, but after losing your mother to a drunk driver when you were ten, you almost transformed into her, becoming the emotional support for your family when there was no one else to fill that role.

You press your lips into a thin line and take a deep breath, your coffee cold and forgotten on the desk in front of you. "We had been talking about it for years, but with the paths our careers were taking, there just wasn't enough time before then." Your eyes look far away, and you don't seem to notice that your lips have unconsciously curved up into a reminiscent smile. "Jeff wanted five kids. Five. God, can you imagine?"

He can, but he doesn't say anything, because he knows you aren't looking for a response. Just for someone to listen.

"I'm an only child," you say with a laugh. "I don't even know what it's like to have one sibling, let alone four." But Jeff had come from a huge family, and he had wanted you to experience that. He loved how full his home always felt growing up, never without someone to talk to. Now you won't ever get to experience that. "I guess I just wish sometimes that we had tried earlier."

"You'll have it someday," Hotch says simply, practically reading your mind. "If that's what you want, you'll have it."

"I waited so long," you whisper, closing your eyes for a long moment. "I was just so afraid that I wouldn't do it right, because I didn't have my mother anymore to help me."

"You would've been a great mother," he assures you, his voice confident. "One day, you will be."

Your breath comes out like a gasp and you clear your throat to keep the tears at bay. "How do you know?"

"I just know."

***

When you push through the doors to the bullpen the next morning, you are greeted by a familiar head of blonde hair.

"Sean?"

He turns around slowly, clearly recognizing your voice, and pulls his lips up into a smile that you return. "Hey, Y/N, how's it going?"

You weren't close to him as a kid, mostly because of the age gap between him and Hotch. You had tried to make more of an effort after graduating college, but Sean was fierce in his convictions, and there were a lot of things he didn't understand about his childhood that you certainly weren't going to explain to him now.

"Good, good," you say, leading him away from the throng of staring women. You shoot them a look that makes them disperse. "You here for your brother? He's upstairs."

He nods, glancing up at the closed office door. You start to lead him to the stairwell when he stops in his tracks and turns to you. "What mood's he in?"

"Why?" you ask, your brow furrowing. "You got bad news? Nothing I need to worry about, I hope."

Sean shakes his head, glancing up at the closed door again. "Nothing like that. I'll just go up."

You let him walk up on his own, knowing he doesn't want you getting involved in whatever he's thinking about. Before you have a moment to catch your breath, the three women return to your side.

"That's Hotch's brother?" Penelope asks, standing so close you can feel her breath on your ear.

"Maybe Hotch is adopted."

"What do you mean?" you ask, unconsciously glancing up the stairs. "They're honestly pretty similar." You're only half joking. They don't look anything alike, but that Hotchner brand of righteousness runs deep.

JJ frowns. "I don't see it."

"Yeah, he looks...like that," Penelope murmurs, before looking at you. "Did you know him when you were younger? Was he hot then too?"

You choke on your own spit. "He was nine years old when I left for college, so...no."

Her eyes widen and she lifts her hands in surrender.

"Ooh, here he comes."

You look up to see Sean storming down the stairs, Hotch hot on his heels.

"Sean, listen to me."

He turns so fast, you're afraid they're going to crash into each other. "Don't profile me, Aaron."

Sean stomps out of the bullpen while Hotch watches him leave, and you can't get the striking feeling of deja vu out of your head. Two boys, 15 years younger than they are now, standing in the same positions, with the same looks on their faces.

You imagine that you and Hotch probably act the same way around each other as when you first met, at eight years old.

The memory comes easily, even with more than two decades of time standing in the way. The little boy with dark hair who had sat next to you on the school bus, just because there were no other empty seats available that day.

You hadn't said anything for the first few stops, just watched him out of the corner of your eye as he nodded his head unconsciously to the music coming out of his large headphones. Eventually, curiosity got the better of you and you tapped on his shoulder. "What are you listening to?"

He had taken his headphones off quickly, as though caught in the act. "What?"

You repeated your question before leveling him with a pointed stare that meant 'there is a correct answer'. You were a feisty kid, and you weren't always the best at making first impressions, so his steady response impressed you. "Beatles. Revolver album."

"I love that one!" you had gushed, leaning in closer without a warning to press your ear to one of the speakers on his headphones. "Is this Yellow Submarine?"

He had nodded, the confusion in his eyes slowly transforming into delight. "You know their stuff?"

"Of course. My favorite's Eleanor Rigby."

He had frowned then. "That one's too sad."

You weren't surprised by his opinion. You had yet to find a boy your age who could appreciate serious music, but liking The Beatles was a start, at least.

"I'm Y/N," you had said, extending your hand like you were starting a business meeting.

He shook your hand furtively. "Aaron."

"Maybe I'll see you around."

The school bus had stopped at your street then, and you had gotten up without another word to this boy, who would one day become your best friend in the world.

Luckily, the next day, Aaron chose to sit next to you again, this time with a second pair of headphones to attach to his compact cassette deck. Two days turned to three, and before long, you had a new friend.

***

"I can't imagine what two weeks away from this place is gonna feel like," you sigh, packing some essentials into your bag and snapping it shut. "I might actually miss you guys."

"Not me," Morgan grins, before pressing a kiss to your cheek as he zips around you. "Two weeks of pure heaven with nothing but young, beautiful adults looking to make vacation memories."

"Your friend's resort better be as nice as you say it is," Elle says sternly as she wiggles her finger at Derek, who is busy inviting Reid to join their vacation.

"Thanks, but I'm going home," he says quickly, without looking at any of you. "Have a good one, guys."

"I'll head out too," you announce, grabbing your things and following him to the elevators. "Wait up, Spence."

He doesn't seem to hear you, but you slip through the doors just before they close. "You okay?"

"Huh?" he says, finally looking up. "Oh, yeah. I'm just not looking forward to the Nevada heat."

You can tell he's lying, but you don't want to press him right before the long break. "You can always call me if you need anything. Seriously."

"Yeah," he nods. "I know."

You wave goodbye to him in the parking lot, and you're back in the silence of your home by the end of the hour.

The rest of your day is spent lazing around the house, and you're asleep when you hear a knock at your door. After Jeff's death, you started keeping your gun in your nightstand, more out of a general sense of security than any specific acute fear, but its proximity during late night calls has given you the peace of mind you needed to finally sleep through the night.

Lifting it from the drawer, you hold it behind your back as you tiptoe to your front door and look through the peephole. When you don't see anyone, you carefully pull the door open, only to find a small packet sitting on your welcome mat with your name scrawled on the top.

After bringing it inside the house and locking the door again, you pry open the seal and extract a large piece of paper covered in a series of numbers and dots.

That's when the phone rings.

***

"How's it going?" you ask Reid and Morgan as you enter the conference room where all of the Fisher King's clues have been laid out. Neither of them have taken their eyes off the paper you brought in since you tacked it up on the board.

As expected, Reid doesn't look up. "The answer to what book we need has to be in here."

"Yeah," Derek sighs, glancing over at you, "but we sure as hell can't see it."

"Yet."

You look at the numbers again, hoping that your short walk to the coffee station and back would have been enough to unlock something new in your brain. Nothing. "The answer has to be based on specific details of each person's clue." A small sound turns your attention to the couch, where Elle is lying on her side. "Is Elle asleep?"

"I'm awake!" she starts, sitting up lethargically.

At the outburst, Hotch walks into the room and points at her bags. "I'm sending you home. You need to get some rest."

"No-"

"We won't do anything without you, I promise."

"Elle, seriously, we're not any closer than we were."

She nods, her lack of sleep seeming to dawn on her as she yawns again.

"Anderson," Hotch calls out, before you stop him. "What is it?"

"I can take her home," you suggest, looking over your shoulder as she lugs her bags down the hall with bleary eyes. He looks like he wants to protest, so you speak up before he has the chance. "She barely knows Anderson. I'll make sure she's settled, and then you can send him to watch her house, so I can come back here."

"I don't know if that's a good idea," he sighs, his eyes still trained on Elle's silhouette lingering by the elevator. "We may need you here."

You cock your head at Reid and Morgan, who have been sitting in the same positions for so long, you're surprised their necks haven't locked. "It's like they said. We haven't made any progress in over an hour. I'm not helping here."

He still looks unsure, but you know it's just worry. He'll always worry about you. "Okay, go. Call me in an hour to check-in."

You dip your head in a nod and jog through the bullpen to catch Elle as she's heading out.

"So you're my bodyguard, huh?"

You laugh, pressing the button for the ground floor. "Something like that."

"Good," Elle says, trying and failing to stifle a yawn, "you're much more fun than Anderson."

"Prettier, too."

The car ride to her house starts off silent, but eventually you break your internal promise to let her come to you. "How are you feeling after last night?"

She just shrugs. "It was more annoying than anything. I'm just glad I got to enjoy at least some of my vacation."

"I heard there was blood all over your room," you point out lightly, trying to broach the subject in a delicate manner. "That can't have been fun to wake up to."

"It was all on the outside. That's part of why they weren't able to hold me. That, and Hotch's lawyer chops."

You raise an eyebrow, glancing over at her as you pull over to the sidewalk. "His lawyer chops?" You know he used to be a prosecutor before joining the bureau, but you never got to see his skills in action.

"Yeah," Elle gushes, her face brightening considerably, "you should have seen the way he walked in there. Those beat cops had no idea what hit 'em. He was in full prosecutor mode, went all rainmaker on them until they released me."

You can imagine it. If any of you were in trouble, he wouldn't let anything get between him and your safety. "I wish I could've seen that."

When you put the car in park, you help Elle with her bags and walk her up to her door, where she insists that she'll be fine on her own.

"I promised I would wait with you until another agent could come and relieve me," you emphasize, instinctively scanning the vicinity around her home as she walks inside and drops her things on the floor.

"In about thirty seconds, I'll be passed out on this couch right here," she points at the window seat behind her, "so you'll just be watching me sleep for an hour."

You open your mouth to argue but she cuts you off. "Y/N, I'll be fine."

If there's one word to describe Elle, it's stubborn, so you let her shut the door behind her and you walk back to your car. Even if she won't let you sit with her inside, you still can't bring yourself to start the ignition, so you lean your seat back halfway and close your eyes, just for a few moments.

You haven't gotten much sleep either, and you're about to doze off when you hear a loud thud from outside the car. Jerking up, you undo the clasp of your holster and push open the car door. The world is silent, except for the rustling of leaves in the wind, but you start making your way up the drive, just to be sure. There's another thud, quieter this time, and you reach for your sidearm as you ascend her porch steps. Then comes a gunshot.

You start running.

[geronimomo-spd]

and there we go! the full Confidential Archive!

here are all the episodes, according to tardis wiki list, including all of the mini specials and chrismas specials and most if not all in good quality! the full list of everything is under the cut because yeah, its a longgg list!

all in order, including some youtube videos and dvd rips hehe, all according the the tardis wiki list

SERIES 1 -

1x00 - A New Dimension (a prolog to season one, narrated by David Tennant)

1x01 - (rose)

1x03 - (the unquiet dead)

1x04 - (aliens of london)

1x05 - (world war 3)

1x06 - (dalek)

1x07 - (the long game)

1x08 - (father's day)

1x09 - (the empty child)

1x10 - (the doctor dances)

1x11 - (boom town)

1x12 - (bad wolf)

1x13.1 - The Ultimate Guide (another little documentary right before

parting of the ways, about key aspects about filming the season)

1x13.2 - (parting of the ways)

1x14 - Backstage at Christmas (the nine minutes they gave us from some of behind the scenes of The Christmas Invasion)

SEIRES 2 -

2x00 - One Year On (a general preview for season 2, including the series 2 press launch, a lot more behind the scenes of The Christmas Invasion and some Torchwood stuff)

2x01 - (new earth)

2x02 - (tooth and claw)

2x03 - (school reunion)

2x04 - (the girl in the fireplace)

2x05 - (rise of the cyberman)

2x06 - (the age of steel)

2x07 - (the idiot's lantern)

2x08 - (the impossible planet)

2x09 - (the satan pit)

2x10 - (love & monsters) - (featuring the winning of the contest of designing a monster)

2x11 - (fear her)

2x12 - (army of ghosts)

2x13 - (doomsday)

2x14 - Music and Monsters (the behind the scenes of doctor who's first music show, including some behind the scenes stuff of The Runaway Bride)

SERIES 3 -

3x01 - (smith and jones)

3x02 - (the shakespear code)

3x03 - (gridlock)

3x04 - (daleks in manhattan)

3x05 - (evolution of the daleks)

3x06 - (the lazarus experiment)

3x05 - (42)

3x06 - (human nature)

3x07 - (the family of blood)

3x08 - (blink)

3x11 - (utopia)

3x12 - (the sound of drums)

3x13.1 - (last of the time lords)

3x13.2 - Children in Need Special (the behind the scenes of the special where 10 meets 5, really cute stuff)

3x14.1 - Kylie Special (series 3 christmas special. version 1 - the full version in less of a good quality i found on youtube, bless this youtube channel honestly)

3x14.2 - Kylie Special (series 3 christmas special. version 2 - the shorter version that was up on iplayer)

3x14.3 - Kylie Special (series 3 christmas special. version 3 - the version i edited to include the low quality parts that were missing with the good quality shorter version)

SERIES 4 (INCLUDING THE SPECIALS) -

4x01 - (partners in crime)

4x02 - (the fiers of pompaii)

4x03 - (planet of the ood)

4x04 - (the sontaran stratagem)

4x05 - (the doctor's daughter)

4x06 - (the posion sky)

4x07 - (the unicorn and the wasp)

4x08 - (silence in the library)

4x09 - (forest of the dead)

4x10 - (midnight)

4x11 - (turn left)

4x12 - (the stolen earth)

4x13 - (journey's end)

4x14.1 - The Journey (So Far) (a documentary about the entire show so far)

4x14.2 - Confidential Christmas 2008 (behind the scenes of The Next Doctor christmas special)

4x14.3 - Doctor Who: Top 5 Christmas Moments (a sort of confidential behind the scenes clip show of all of the episodes set at christmas)

4x15.1 - At the Proms 2008 (behind the scenes of doctor who at the proms 2008)

4x15.2 - The Eleventh Doctor (the special they used to announce Matt Smith as the new doctor who)

4x15.3 - Desert Storm (behind the scenes of Planet Of The Dead)

4x16 - Is There Life on Mars? (behind the scenes of The Waters Of Mars)

4x17 - Lords and Masters (behind the scenes of The End Of Time, Part One)

4x18 - Allons-y! (behind the scenes of The End Of Time, Part Two. version 1 - full dvd version)

4x18 - Allons-y! (behind the scenes of The End Of Time, Part Two. version 2 - shortend higher quality version from iplayer, this version has a song in the soundtrack that is diffrent from the dvd version, this is the most accurate version to what aired on tv at the time)

SERIES 5-

5x01 - (the eleventh hour)

5x02 - (the beast below)

5x03 - (victory of the daleks)

5x04 - (the time of angels)

5x05 - (flesh and stone)

5x06 - (the vampires of venice)

5x07 - (amy's choice)

5x08 - (the hungry earth)

5x09 - (cold blood)

5x10.1 - (vincent and the doctor)

5x10.2 Monster Files: The Daleks (a little documentary about victory of the daleks/daleks in general)

5x11 - (the lodger)

5x12 - (the pandorica opens)

5x13 - (the big bang)

5x14.1 - Monster Files: The Weeping Angels (a little documentary about the weeping angels episodes this season)

5x14.2 - Monster Files: The Silurians (a little documentary about the silurian episodes)

5x14.3.1 - Monster Files: The Alliance (a little documentary about the alliance of monsters from the pandoica opens)

5x14.3.2 - Backstage at the Doctor Who Prom 2010 (behind the scenes of doctor who at the proms 2010)

5x14.4.1 - Charlie McDonnell - Runner (the first Charlle behind the scenes videos, pretty quiet - Currently not up on the archives as Charlie has expressed the need to remove her old videos)

5.14.4.2 - Charlie McDonnell - TARDIS (another Charlie video, she explores the tardis set this time -Currently not up on the archives as Charlie has expressed the need to remove her old videos)

5x14.4.3 - Charlie McDonnell - Decorating Bus (another Charlie video, she decorates the food place with christmas decorations, i liked them Charlie - Currently not up on the archives as Charlie has expressed the need to remove her old videos)

5x14.4.4 - Charlie McDonnell - Christmas Presents (badger) (the famus Charlie video where she brings the cast and crew presents! this is where Matt gets his badger puppet - Currently not up on the archives as Charlie has expressed the need to remove her old videos)

5x14.5 - Christmas Special 2010 (behind the scenes of A Christmas Carol)

SERIES 6 -

6x01.1 - (the impossible astronaut)

6x01.2 - My Sarah Jane: A Tribute to Elisabeth Sladen (a special memorial for the late Elisabth Sladen 😭😭)

6x02 - (day of the moon)

6x03 - (the curse of the black spot)

6x04 - (the doctor's wife)

6x05 - (the rebel flesh)

6x06 - (the almost people)

6x07.1 - Charlie McDonnell interviews Neil Gaiman (Charlie interviews Neil Gaiman, appewrently causing some ruckes on Charlie's blog at the time hehe - Currently not up on the archives as Charlie has expressed the need to remove her old videos)

6x07.2 - (a good man goes to war)

6x07.3 - The Monster Files: The Silence (a little documentary on the silence, thank god because i needed that)

6x07.4 - The Monster Files: The Gangers (a little documentary on the gangers, my beloveds)

6x07.5 - Charlie McDonnell Becomes A Dalek (the last Charlie video, released late because it had the 1-4 tardis set, also she gets to ride a dalek in this one - Currently not up on the archives as Charlie has expressed the need to remove her old videos)

6x08 - (lets kill hitler)

6x09 - (night terrors)

6x10 - (the girl who waited)

6x11 - (the god complex)

6x12 - (closing time)

6x13.1 - (the wedding of river song)

6x13.2 - The Monster Files: The Antibodies (a little documentary on the antibodies from lets kill hitler)

6x13.3 - The Monster Files: The Cybermats (a little documentary on the little adorable cybermates because awww)

6x14 - The Nights' Tale (a little documentary on on the nights mini episodes! the last confidential stuff ever made rip)

[ladyluscinia]

I still cannot wrap my head around the S2 timeline for the life of me. Why did they do it like that?????

I've seen more than one person insist that it works better on rewatch, or that I've just forgotten how fast the S1 pace was, and like... No? Because, yeah, S1 was about 5 hours of tv and pretty zippy, but it also had in-universe timeskips that I feel S2 desperately needed.

Off the top of my head there's a skip before 1x03. A short one before 1x05, and a longer one before 1x06. There's probably one before 1x08, one in the middle of 1x09, and a montage/timeskip in the twin arcs of 1x10. Not to mention I think you can headcanon more skips in around the end of 1x01 and just before 1x07???

Yeah Izzy goes from grumpy to itching for Stede's murder in no (screen)time at all, but I don't have any trouble with the pacing of it because first they tell me "here's enough information about Izzy to see he doesn't want to be here" and then "now he's been stewing on his bad feelings for nearly two weeks". I didn't need to see the stewing in depth, I just needed to know it happened so the blowup made sense.

Same for Stede and Edward's relationship development. Yeah they wake up every episode closer together than they left off - time is passing. It makes sense. It's also really fast and kind of fragile, which they let us know with the beats they do put on screen, but I'm not baffled when the hell Stede found out how Edward likes his tea? It feels like a rushed month or so of relationship, not a speedrun of 5 days.

S2 did not do this? In fact, S2 strung almost all of its episodes together with a joke or an event or some kind of visual cue that each takes place immediately after the one before. To headcanon a timeskip I have to deliberately bend the evidence in a way that comes across more "it technically doesn't specify" than any supported reading of the canon.

Why? What's the point? The main thing it accomplishes is making abrupt character turns (e.g. Jim's anger at Edward vanishing) stand out as problems because I can't even pretend there was an offscreen conversation or time for tensions to cool.

Bitch, that happened yesterday???

[cobbbvanth]

please reblog for a larger sample size! defend your fave in the tags! i did this last year on @ofmdsource (results) but i'm very interested to see if the ranks have changed

SEASON 2 POLL

[goodwhump-temp]

Kuroko Whump | Kuroko No Basket (Anime)

"I'm typically forgotten 364 days a year."

1x01 Manhandled 1x02 Kise confrontation 1x03 'Choked' 1x04 Gut punch, smacked, bleeding, light headed, passes out, bandaged 1x05 Hospital checkup, 'missing', bully confrontation, manhandled, tackled, pain 1x06 Picked up, insulted/annoyed 1x07 Anxious 1x08 Head grabbed 1x09 Annoyed 1x12 Punched 1x14 (12:30), smothered 1x18 Aomine issues, manipulated 1x19 Kagami issues/inbalance the whole episode, (11:00) 1x20 Inbalance cont.

2x01 Head threatened 2x02 Annoyed 2x05 Insulted, depressed 2x06 Shoved 2x11 In danger (12:10), angry, anxious 2x12 Lightheaded, weak 2x14 Shock, angry, crying 2x15 Knocked down 2x16 Exhausted 2x17 Depressed 2x18 Tumble, crying flashback/protected (21:00) 2x19 Passes out, carried 2x20 Collapses, unconscious 2x21 Slapped 2x22 Angry 2x24 Knocked down

3x13 Crying, nervous/trembling, trips, bloody nose 3x15 Emotional, crying 3x16 Knocked down, hospitalized, emotional pain, crying, chest pain, depressed, guilt 3x18 Dissapointed x5 (shut-down) 3x24 Exhausted, emotional, happy tears 3x26 Birthday!

"Last Game" Movie - Punched, pain, protected/comforted/carried, angry, emotional

[whumpystuffy]

Whump list -Burn Notice (2007-2013)

Main character Michael Weston portrayed by Jeffrey Donovan.

Trailer for the series.

Some of the whump are inflicted on purpose, meaning he could’ve prevented it with his skills but is often undercover so has to withstand the pain. I’ve chosen to include it with cursive writing since you sometimes can see him “faking it” and that kinda ruins the whump for me.

Season 1

1x01 Gunpoint, manhandled. Kicked multiple times, grunting in pain, bloody bruised face, fight, limping, passes out. Aftermath, bruised body/ribs, grunting by movement. Pain inflicted on bruised ribs.

1x02 Inside burning house, coughing.

1x03 Chased, jumps off building, twists ankle, limping, ice on ankle. Outnumbered, fight.

1x04 Attacked, struggle, slammed against wall. Gunfire, hit with ricochet bullet in shoulder, bleeding. Field medicine, bullet removed, grunts in pain, needs help getting dressed.

1x05 Gun to chest, manhandled, pushed to the ground, fear. Blindfolded.

1x06 Fight, outnumbered, threatened. Under gunpoint, under gunfire. Slammed against car twice.

1x07 Under gunpoint, punched multiple times, bloody mouth, manhandled, grunts in pain. Punched, kicked, arm twisted in pain, strangled.

1x08 Fight, hand grabbed, twisted in pain, punched, strangled, heavy breathing.

1x09 Punched, under gunpoint. Strangled by wire, coughing, gasping for air, wound on neck.

1x11 Crying, emotional. Under gunpoint, punched.

1x12 Wanted, gunpoint. Fight, multiple punches, slammed against wall, beaten up, grunts in pain, strangled, bruised face. (Plus major Sam’s whumps)

Season 2

2x04 Beaten up for cover, punched multiple times in face, bloody cut on face, bloody mouth & nose. Handcuffed. Fight, punched, slammed into wall.

2x06 Under gunpoint. Attacked, punched multiple times.

2x07 Chased, outnumbered, thrown into wall, manhandled, gun to chest. Punched, head slammed into table, all an act though. Hit with bat, pain, strangled, interrogated, punched.

2x08 Bruised back shown from previous episode, worried mom. Car crash, pain, limping.

2x09 Pushed against fence, gun point, pinned against wall, pistol wippped, fear. Field medicine, head wound, stitched up.

2x10 Hit by explosion, unconscious, needs help walking, pain, injured arm. Tied to chair, hooded, interrogated. Homemade arm sling. Pain/grunts caused by movement of shoulder. Fight, punched, bruised face.

2x11 Under gunfire. Emotional, manhandled, angry, held back.

2x13 Hostage in bank robbery, gunpoint, threatened, punched, bloody face cut, field medicine.

2x14 Attacked, knife cut on arm, bleeding.

2x15 Fight, punched multiple times, slammed against wall.

2x16 Fight. Wanted by agency, on the run.

Season 3

3x01 On the run, surrenders, handcuffed, arrested, in jail. Painfully gets arm twisted, interrogated, shoulder dislocated, grunts in pain, begging, painfully set back, ice pack on shoulder. Shoulder twisted again, shot at, fear. Tied up, punched, cuts wrist by freeing himself, fight.

3x02 Tied up, interrogated, multiple punches, knife play in face, cut, fear, bloody mouth.

3x03 Cuts himself on glass. Brother shot in front of him.

3x04 Hit’s himself, bloody cut, bruised eye.

3x06 Attacked, outnumbered, fight, tasered, unconscious, manhandled, captive, tied up. Fight, escapes. Rough fight, grabbed by throat.

3x09 Shot with rubber bullet, coughing, pistol whipped.

3x15 Threatened, inside burning warehouse, coughing.

3x16 On the run, wanted. Hit by explosion, bloody head wound, kicked, foot on neck, pinned down, suffocating, jumps off building. Car crash, dizzy, fight, slammed against car multiple times, bruised face, hooded, handcuffed.

Season 4

4x01 Bruises from previous episode. Rough fight, under gunfire. Crying, emotional whump.

4x02 (Plus Jesse’s whumps)

4x03 Slammed into table twice, gunpoint. Punched, interrogated, manhandled, grabbed by throat.

4x05 Fight, knife cut, bleeding.

4x09 Walks into trap, gunpoint, hostage, tied up, punched, threatened. Attacked, fight.

4x10 Attacked, thrown through window, pinned down, cut, bleeding chest wound. Field medicine, stitched up. Handcuffed, prison undercover, threatened, power play. Multiple small fights.

4x12 Walks into trap, outnumbered, gunpoint, pistol whipped, bleeding head wound. Manhandled, shot in shoulder, bleeding out, interrogated, in pain, car crash, unconscious.

4x13 Coma, life support, head wound. Discharges himself, arm in a cast, refuses painkillers. Lots of pain throughout the episode by moving injured shoulder.

4x14 Still pain from bullet wound in previous episodes.

4x18 Car crash, on the run, rough fight, emotional, crying. (Plus Jessie’s whump)

Season 5

5x03 Paranoid, night terrors, punched.

5x04 Drugged, unconscious, tied up, interrogated, plastic bag over head, choking, gun point. Hostage, tied up, explosion blast.

5x08 Pistol whipped, bleeding head wound, threatened, gunpoint, tied up, kneeling, interrogated.

5x10 Inside burning building, burns arm, field medicine. Cuts himself, bloody head wound, manhandled, gun point, punched, pinned down, grunts.

5x11 Rough fight, gunpoint, tied up.

5x12 Hostage, forced to do job, punched, threatened, head slammed into disk, pinned down, bloody head wound, threatened, kicked.

5x16 Mind games, emotional, talks about dark past.

Season 6

6x01 Crying. Fight, hit with metal bar. (Plus Jessie whump)

6x04 Emotional, hit by explosion blast. (Plus Sam’s whump)

6x06 Major emotional whump episode, crying, brother dies in front of him..

6x07 Shot in vest, grunts in pain.

6x10 Attacked, punched, bruised ribs, pain when moving throughout episode. Jumps through window, bleeding face wound.

6x11 Bruises from previous episode. Fight, captured, gunpoint, handcuffed, interrogated, kicked multiple times, electrocuted, in pain, bloody mouth.

6x12 Emotional, wanted, on the run. (Plus Jessie’s whump)

6x14 Hit by flash grenade, ringing ears, dizzy, gunpoint. Tied to chair, burned with curling iron, hooded, manhandled.

6x17 Attacked, gunpoint. (Plus major Sam and Jessie whump)

6x18 Emotional, blood donated by syringe. (Plus major Sam whump)

Season 7

7x01 Bloody knuckles, rough fight, punched multiple times, bloody face, strangled, lip cut.

7x04 Cut on arm, bleeding, bandage, manhandled, punched. Waterboarding, handcuffed, interrogated, coughing.

7x06 Breaks down crying.

7x07 Tasered, unconscious, blinded, manhandled, interrogated, sleep deprived, worn out. Dragged, weak, drugged, hallucinating, breaking down, crying. Needs help walking, limping.

7x08 Hit by explosion blast, limping, field medicine, bandages. (Plus Jessie’s whump)

7x10 Tied up, gagged, punched, kneeling.

7x11 Attacked, rough fight, knife cut on arm, bleeding, field medicine. Cover blown, slapped, punched, bleeding face wound, interrogated, gunpoint, pain inflicted in arm wound, begging.

7x12 Bruises from previous episode. Fight with best friend, not himself.

7x13 Shot in the shoulder. And lowkey suicidal.

Phew! What a show I must say. Enjoyed every minute of it. There’s a lot of good whump here and I think this list speaks for itself! It’s lowkey reminding me of MacGyver but with a twist of The Mentalist?

[911lonestarrewatch]

Welcome to the 2024 hiatus rewatch!

Starting January 1st, we will be watching two episodes per week (Monday - Sunday). These can be watched at any point throughout the week. Complete rewatch schedule can be found below the cut!

Reminders of which episodes we will be watching each week will be posted on Sunday around noon CST. On Monday, a discussion post will go live that you can reply to if you want to talk to your fellow rewatchers, as well as a list of any fanfics that are tagged on AO3 with the episode number.

We encourage anyone participating to live blog, share their thoughts, scream about their favorite parts, or post any newly created fanworks about the episode using #911 lone star rewatch 2024

Other ways you can participate:

Reblog gif sets, fan art, fan fics, edits, metas, etc. related to the episodes of the week! Tag them ‘911 lone star rewatch 2024’ and we will do our best to reblog as much as we can as well, including queuing up posts throughout the week. (Obviously we will not reblog spam, or anything hateful or bigoted.)

Send us fic recs pertaining to the weekly episodes! Not everyone tags the episode on AO3, so send us anything we missed.

Please mention us @911lonestarrewatch or use the tag ‘911 lone star rewatch 2024’ if you post any new gif sets, fics, or fan art pertaining to that week’s episodes

Feel free to come and go as you please, there’s no obligation to take part every week. Also feel free to fall behind and reblog stuff from past weeks. The schedule is just to give this some structure, not a deadline anyone has to meet.

And have fun!

Schedule under the cut:

January 1st - January 7th:

1x01: Pilot

1x02: Yee-Haw

January 8th - January 14th:

1x03: Texas Proud

1x04: Act of God

January 15th - January 21st:

1x05: Studs

1x06: Friends Like These

January 22nd - January 28th:

1x07: Bum Steer

1x08: Monster Inside

January 29th - February 4th:

1x09: Awakening

1x10: Austin, We Have a Problem

February 5th - February 11th:

2x01: Back in the Saddle

2x02: 2100°

February 12th - February 18th:

2x03: Hold the Line

2x04: Friends with Benefits

February 19th - February 25th:

2x05: Difficult Conversations

2x06: Everyone and Their Brother

February 26th - March 3rd:

2x07: Displaced

2x08: Bad Call

March 4th - March 10th:

2x09: Saving Grace

2x10: A Little Help From My Friends

March 11th - March 17th:

2x11: Slow Burn

2x12: The Big Heat

March 18th - March 24th:

2x13: One Day

2x14: Dust to Dust

March 25th - March 31st:

3x01: The Big Chill

3x02: Thin Ice

April 1st - April 7th:

3x03: Shock & Thaw

3x04: Push

April 8th - April 14th:

3x05: Child Care

3x06: The ATX-Files

April 15th - April 21st:

3x07: Red vs Blue

3x08: In the Unlikely Event of an Emergency

April 22nd - April 28th:

3x09: The Bird

3x10: Parental Guidance

April 29th - May 5th:

3x11: Prince Albert in a Can

3x12: Negative Space

May 6th - May 12th

3x13: Riddle of the Sphynx

3x14: Impulse Control

May 13th - May 19th

3x15: Down To Clown

3x16: Shift-Less

May 20th - May 26th

3x17: Spring Cleaning

3x18: A Bright and Cloudless Morning

May 27th - June 2nd:

4x01: The New Hotness

4x02: The New Hot Mess

June 3rd - June 9th:

4x03: Cry Wolf

4x04: Abandoned

June 10th - June 16th:

4x05: Human Resources

4x06: This Is Not a Drill

June 17th - June 23rd:

4x07: Tommy Dearest

4x08: Control Freaks

June 24th - June 30th:

4x09: Road Kill

4x10: Sellouts

July 1st - July 7th:

4x11: Double Trouble

4x12: Swipe Left

July 8th - July 14th:

4x13: Open

4x14: Tongues Out

July 15th - July 21th:

4x15: Donors

4x16: A House Divided

July 22nd - July 28th:

4x17: Best of Men

4x18: In Sickness and In Health

[emonydeborah]

snw episodes rated by Una

in which Una is my unit of measurement, not that this is what she would think of the events

All from memory bc who has time

SPOILERS FOR EVERYTHING

1x01: she’s literally the catalyst for getting Chris off his butt and the whole episode. Barely in it but she did all the detective work for everybody. “Somehow I knew you would” with the little smile and “La’an!” in the softest voice immediately established both relationships and my abiding love for her. She’s literally driving the plot but still not there much; 6/10.

1x02: she shares some LooksTM with Chris. Chris was slightly subdued at one (1) dinner party and Una went something is deeply wrong. Chris is sad and Una tells him to live his gosh darn life. Pretty sure she flies the ship a bit. She’s here. Can’t complain. 6/10.

1x03: OOOOHOHO here we go. Whatever camera angle it is that shoots from the floor to watch people walk away and makes them look tall was excellently utilized. Girl was STRIDING everywhere. Hauled a grown man over her shoulder and was greeted with the shock and awe she deserved. Told her biggest secret (!!!!) to help the crew!!! bc she would sacrifice herself for them!!!!! also she googled her glowworm episode like it had not happened her whole life (which I will accept as a writer thing. but she really looked at a picture of someone glowing bc of an infection and went 😮). Girlie managed a whole ship of sedated/crazy people and did not let anyone jump into the sun/warp core. Had a deep talk with La’an and revealed more of their shared history. Stunning. 10/10.

1x04 another case of I can’t complain. As my favorite character I want her to be happy, but I will take some internal bleeding and other catastrophic injuries. As a treat. The sheer power of ordering the medical staff to give away her blood transfusion and then knocking herself out before they could argue. Unparalleled. Had no impact on the main plot but what she did do in her sphere of influence was important and exemplary. I’ll take it. 7/10.

1x05: back at it again with the b-plot but I AM HERE FOR IT. GIVE ME LA’AN AND UNA BEING GOOFY. Loved the death glare at Joseph so he would confess and how she pretended not to be huffy about her nickname. La’an went can we… play a game… and Una went YEs sounds educational. For science. The look of absolute shock and betrayal when La’an shot her and her little “ow.” “People are idiots. You’re fun.” La’an went lol my childhood was a bleak horror scape and Una went absolutely NOT I’m going to commit crimes to rectify this. I like people having wacky misadventures while the plot is plotting somewhere. 8/10.

1x06 Chris forgot her name. She had to leave so she wouldn’t verbally tear him to shreds in front of his crew. Most likely explanation. Where was she I miss her. 4/10.

1x07: she locked the pirates out of the ship!!! We love a competent first officer shooting people on her bridge. She shook her head half an inch and Spock went absolutely whatever you say. Chris was thrown to the floor in front of her and she crossed her arms and watched him get up. “We’re starting a mutiny.” "Someone's breaking the rules today." Legitimately appreciated her teamwork with Chris in planting the mutiny idea. Would love to see it again sometime. 7/10.

1x08: bow and arrow. She checked on Joseph after and I appreciated that they carried that through from her finding out about Rukiya before. Una was here but she wasn't Una. Also. If we're real she wasn't really there. I liked the eye shadow though. 5/10.

1x09: "you should really try the omelet." The breakfast scene is my favorite and in fact the only scene. Nothing else happened with Hemmer or Spock or anyone. Really short episode. I would have liked to have seen her face when Chris snapped the tongs. She tried to follow the shuttle to the surface with scans and Chris went nah babe we're fine. Let her do her job Chris. Breakfast scene 10/10. Episode 5/10.

1x10: notable by her absence. She checked on Chris and once again told him to live his life. She's not there in the future but I won't take points for that because Chris immediately went where is my bestie. I cannot function without my work wife where is she. Her arrest kick-started the series and for our cliffhanger she was arrested again. I'm sensing a theme. What will they incarcerate her for next and how will Chris break her out this time. I will always appreciate Chris going absolutely feral for his first officer/life partner. 9/10.

2x01: prison. She tells Chris not to be stupid and he goes don't tell me what to do *cough* I love you *cough* Not a strong start for our girl but I trust her to overcome. Once again Chris is going off on a mission to save her. Lost points for the brevity of her appearance and the weird black jumpsuit. 4/10.

2x02: Girl sat in a chair and watched her friends say nice things about her for days. I would shrivel up and die. Una looks teary. Her lawyer put some heat on a guy who said he would NEVER hire Una if he knew her real race and Una said that was too mean leave him alone. La'an confessed her feelings in public. Spock gave the whole courtroom a heart attack to make Una smile. Chris hugged her looking panicky. please don't go away again. Una looked at Chris like she wanted to kiss him or perhaps sip one milkshake through two straws. The whole episode is about how great she is. 15/10.

2x03: unfortunately for most of this episode she did not exist. Liked the professional and sassy attitude towards Pelia but I must reduce points for Una not existing. 2/10.

2x04: Una succumbed to a disease she should canonically be immune to. Fridged almost immediately. Chris said I need some good fighters and took his doctor instead of his super strong first officer who was familiar with the terrain. Una called Chris out on relationship nonsense like the og she is but this cannot repair the damage. Drove me to writing fix-it fic. -10/10.

2x05: Una is canonically one of the girls. She hangs out with some very specific junior officers including her emotionally constipated son and her traumatized daughter. She laughs very loudly and I like to think the writers are purposefully making her more open now that people know her genetics secret. Tells Mr. Spock how to be a Vulcan. Part of a lineup to talk to Spock and is a head taller than the rest of the line. All in all a great time. 9/10.

2x06: she yells at her former professor who is also thousands of years old. I would simply perish. "yoU HaVe CruMBs oN yOuR uNifOrM" Starfleet said we need someone to get this defunct and thus far unmanageable station up and running. Send Una. "Oh good, I was afraid I'd miss the speech." Rebecca Romijn note- she is nine inches taller than Carol Kane, but she manages to look/act a lot younger and smaller than normal. Pelia takes about 14 seconds to get Una teary eyed. "My final paper was METICULOUSLY researched." 8/10.

2x07: "That's ridiculous, we can't just 'Not Look.'" "Like... a p i n - u p p o s t e r?" Girl is constantly baffled the whole time. One (1) young man was unnerved by her and she went he knows how I die. She then winked at him and he almost had a stroke. We see a picture of her as she is idolized in the future. Excellent. Different flavor than 2x06 but still 8/10.

2x08: lots of Significant Eye Contact with Chris. She said if you don't get this ship where it's going asap I will revoke your command and drive us there myself. "Everyone is on their own journey." I feel like she knows Joseph murdered a man in sickbay but we don't know for sure. She's out here being a competent first officer and telling the captain how the crew is feeling. I like the reminder of her priorities. Chris is here to explore and it's Una's job to make sure he has a functional crew to do so. 6/10.

2x09: Una Chin-Riley, musical theater nerd, had the absolute time of her life and I am so happy for her. Girl JUMPED into that first song with much soulful pushing of buttons. "A surprisingly beautiful baritone." Chris asked Uhura the singer how musicals work and Una answered. Is feeling her feelings so much these days she started singing about her job. Waltzed through the halls with James T Kirk. La'an went I would like to not do this please and Una said feel your feelings. Fly away with me. Accept yourself. Love yourself. "You came in here hot. On fire. It's making me sweat." The whole ship is singing and La'an is making friends. This was the best day of Una's life. 1000/10.

2x10: Una volunteered for a dangerous forbidden mission to save her husband's gf and spent the whole time stalking around the bridge like a tiger or a mom looking for sales at Target and giving hopeful speeches. She did tell Spock his gf might be dead but if you want to look for her go for it champ. "ORDERS CAPTAIN" Chris is hanging on by a thread. Una is the thread. Not a great end if I'm honest but she did look fantastic walking around murderously. 5/10.

[elizadushkudaily]

Dollhouse masterlist!

February 2009 - January 2010 | Dollhouse. Eliza Dushku plays Echo and others - full 27 episode masterlist below! (Eliza appears in every episode.) Echo is part of a top secret corporate operation, and she is based out of the Los Angeles "Dollhouse."

You can also find the episode list by season in the Dollhouse posters. Episodes in parentheses did not air live on TV.

Masterlist: (1x00 Echo) 1x01 Ghost 1x02 The Target 1x03 Stage Fright 1x04 Gray Hour 1x05 True Believer 1x06 Man on the Street 1x07 Echoes 1x08 Needs 1x09 A Spy in the House of Love 1x10 Haunted 1x11 Briar Rose 1x12 Omega (1x13 Epitaph One) 2x01 Vows 2x02 Instinct 2x03 Belle Chose 2x04 Belonging 2x05 The Public Eye 2x06 The Left Hand 2x07 Meet Jane Doe 2x08 A Love Supreme 2x09 Stop Loss 2x10 The Attic 2x11 Getting Closer 2x12 The Hollow Men 2x13 Epitaph Two: Return multi [multiple episodes, sometimes also tagged by episode] all [everything! can also be viewed in archive mode] bts [sometimes with other cast] cast [not on set] icons [and gifpacks, etc] promos and stills

Dollhouse aired in the 9 pm Friday night timeslot, and has an overall IMDB rating of 8 / 10. S1 was shot on 35 mm film but S2 was shot on high-definition video. Eliza also served as series producer on Dollhouse. This was Eliza's second TV show where she was a series regular cast member, after Tru Calling.

In case you haven't seen this show: On Dollhouse a corporation runs numerous underground establishments (known as "Dollhouses") that program individuals referred to as Actives (or Dolls) with temporary personalities and skills. The series follows the Active known as "Echo" on her journey toward self-awareness. (x)

(both gifs thanks to brainpocalpyse!)

[gallavich-headcanon]

Episode Masterpost - Gallavich-Headcanon

S1 1x01 1x02 1x03 1x04 1x05 1x06 1x07 1x08 1x09 1x10 1x11 1x12

S2 2x01 2x02 2x03 2x04 2x05 2x06 2x07 2x08 2x09 2x10 2x11 2x12

S3 3x01 3x02 3x03 3x04 3x05 3x06 3x07 3x08 3x09 3x10 3x11 3x12

S4 4x01 4x02 4x03 4x04 4x05 4x06 4x07 4x08 4x09 4x10 4x11 4x12

S5 5x01 5x02 5x03 5x04 5x05 5x06 5x07 5x08 5x09 5x10 5x11 5x12

S6 6x01 6x02 6x03 6x04 6x05 6x06 6x07 6x08 6x09 6x10 6x11 6x12

[amuseoffyre]

Collating a list of Stede's flashbacks/trauma-hallucinations across the seasons (so far). Hallucinations will be italicised. I hadn't realised just how many there were.

1x01

"this is what a man's work looks like" - Father Bonnet killing the goose, then verbally abusing Stede

"left your comfortable life" - family portrait, the family discussion of horses with Stede isolated at one end of the table.

"this is my home now" - the same scene, only this time Stede is sitting with them instead of isolated from them.

1x02

Ghost Nigel beside the Revenge

Flashback to dead Nigel on the deck

"They'll never see papa again" - during the trial in the village.

"This is all coming from you" - Stede thinking about his departure and whispering goodbye to his children.

1x03

Life flashing before his eyes when he's hanged - Mary and the children at a distance

1x04

Department of Backstory - unhappy betrothal, marriage, children and "we were just playing pirates"

Anniversary presents going wrong - he and Mary at odds

"I was a coward" - Mary's appeal for him to try and his departure

Fever Gravy Basket incident when he manifests his family to tear him a new one and then he's killed by the fantasy version of piracy

1x05 and 1x06 have Ed's flashbacks. 1x07 has Jim's flashbacks. 1x08 has none.

1x09

"Mr Bonnet. Welcome" - sees Nigel instead of Chauncey

"weak-hearted lily-livered little rich boy" returns

"I stole his sword and jabbed it through his head" - dead Nigel on the deck

"wife, Mary Bonnet" - flash of Mary's disapproving face

Repeat of the happy families flashback from episode 1, with all of them sitting together and laughing" mismatched with the "which is your favourite pig" passive aggression

Beach flashback including "playing pirates", "I don't hate our lives" and Stede's arrival on the Revenge

Post-kiss flashback to Mary's "we have to try, don't we?"

"You defile beautiful things" flashbacks to dead Nigel, unhappy family portrait and Ed

"God's perfect little rich boy" - goose-killing and flower-picking flashbacks

1x10

"Death is an unavoidable part of the pirate lifestyle" - dead Nigel on deck, dead Chauncey in the forest and Stede screaming

"His name is Ed" - Stede's romance flashbacks

None in 2x01 but a full fantasy dream sequence that references a lot of the stuff he's worrying about.

2x02

"You wear fine things well" - Stede's POV

2x03 is only Ed flashback/trauma/coma hallucinations. 2x04 & 2x05 have none.

2x06

back-to-back flashbacks of flower-picking and goose-killing, immediately after Ned's death

Technically no flashbacks in 2x07, but since Stede spends his entire day being cheered on and praised by a man in a blood-stained leather apron (like this father in the goose-killing incident) after doing 'man's work', don't think he really needs to be flashing back 😬

And 2x08 really didn't have time for any, despite the fact that Stede ended up in the same uniform of the first two people who's deaths he was involved with.

[fexalted]

watching tos for the first time since like, roughly 2012/13-ish? i don't remember what year it was, or why i only got thru most of season 1 before stopping

it's been fun to refresh my swiss cheesed memory with this tho so here's a semi-liveblog of the first 10 eps that i watched over the past couple weeks

1x01 - the man trap

things i remembered beforehand:

salt monster

"plum" uwu

that gay little run and crawl jim does when he's taking cover (it fills me with such delight)

things i did not remember:

how many people died, good god man it's only the first episode

1x02 - charlie x

things i remembered:

jim's bright red exercise pants

that stupid fucking face charlie makes when he uses his powers

not liking this ep at all when i first watched it, possibly due to me being around the same age as charlie at the time

additional thoughts: i enjoyed it more this time and felt more sympathetic for charlie. poor kid needed some parents, and also, like, a hug

1x03 - where no man has gone before

things i remembered:

bones isn't in it :'( (bored) (sad) (missing my bestie)

"James R Kirk"

that post i saw on here recently about how their contacts were made of glass

the only thing i could think about while watching:

their contacts

were made

of GLASS

(yes i understand this was how contacts were made back then. still freaked out by the concept of people putting glass in their eyes on purpose)

1x04 - the naked time

things i remembered:

sweat disease

sulu fencing

oh kathleen

"ONE-MORE-TIME!!"

"love mankind"

spock breakdown (extremely uncomfortable to watch)

bones casually ripping jim's shirt sleeve to jab him in the arm (extremely hilarious every time i think about it)

did not remember:

anything about them almost crashing into a planet lol

jim's little monologue when he gets infected (lmao)

time warp???

additional thoughts: hey remember when they reused this plot in tng and tasha and data fucked (<- literally the only thing i can remember about it) ((edit from future fex: i rewatched that ep. it was wild. tos did it better tho))

1x05 - the enemy within

things i remembered:

unicorn dog :)

evil kirk and poor little meow meow kirk

"I'M CAPTAIN KIRK!!!"

things not remembered:

dog dies :(

evil kirk's killer eyeliner

additional thoughts: say what you will about shatner / his acting but this ep is Peak shatner performance and a lot of fun to watch. he put his whole pussy into it, as the kids say these days

1x06 - mudd's women

things remembered:

could not forget harry mudd if i tried

the women are color coded like the powerpuff girls lol

they're also like, on some kind of drug that keeps them looking young or something

cool costumes tho

i don't have much to say about this one lol, harry's a fun character but the rest of the ep wasn't super interesting to me. did finally learn how to pronounce "ophiuchus" tho so i'll thank it for that

1x07 - what are little girls made of

things remembered:

is this the penis rock episode (it is)

uhhh i think kirk gets put into some kind of spinny machine that makes androids (he does)

more cool costumes (debatable)

things i find funny:

the number of planets we've encountered so far that are populated by like. 2-4 people

the way ruk (the big guy) just picks up and throws kirk like he weighs nothing

so much buildup with kirk and the penis rock and he doesn't even get to hit ruk over the head with it smh

also not a funny moment but i liked the way kirk was able to get a message to spock thru the android kirk, v clever

wait i just realized bones wasn't in this ep either. deducting 1/4 of a star from my mental rating bc i missed him (but apparently not that much)

1x08 - miri

remembered:

planet of children (bc everyone else died of terminal puberty)

"no blah blah blah!"

bones tests his newly discovered, untested cure on himself, in true mad scientist fashion (also spones moment <3)

saw this ep on a "what's your fave 'bad' episode" poll here recently and i can't remember if i thought it was good or bad when i first watched it lol

forgot:

another earth?? there's just a second, identical earth floating around out there?? and (of course) they don't mention it at all for the rest of the episode

300 year old children

oh these kids are so much more annoying than i remembered, however i may just be biased bc i don't like kids shfkshfk

1x09 - dagger of the mind

remember:

absolutely nothing! oh boy!

thoughts:

wow this ep is fucked up!

okay actually i don't think i've seen this one at all before?

usually there'll be moments that jog my memory but the only thing even slightly familiar to me was kirk going "helen don't go!" while in the neutralizer chair, but i could've just seen a clip/gif of it before

i remember skipping episodes in season 1 (i was impatient and wanted to get to city on the edge of forever) but i thought i'd at least made it to halfway thru the season before skipping any

anyway did i mention this ep is fucked up? (star trek really does love to drop an absolutely haunting 50 minutes of television on you and then never address it again, i understand this now. roll credits!)

1x10 - the corbomite maneuver

remember:

uhh

there's a thing out there

it's in the way

preventing them from boldly going, even

looks like an old windows screensaver

i might've skipped this ep too now that i think about it

thoughts:

cute mckirk moment in sickbay :3

i love that this cube has its own theme music whenever its on screen

oh shit it's the sequel to cube: orb

jesus christ that's a big orb

man they really said "okay we've got 3 music tracks and we're gonna get our money's worth out of them"

i gotta say this ep slaps tbh—WAIT HE'S A BABY???

LITTLE BABY MAN

LMAOOOOO

honestly great episode tho i'll stand by that

[goodwhump-temp]

Jake Peralta Whump | Brooklyn 99

1x01 Pilot - Manhandled, thrown, held at gunpoint 1x02 The Tagger - Career in jeopardy/threatened 1x03 The Slump - Really bad day, "cursed" 1x04 M.E. Time - Squeamish 1x05 The Vulture - Angry, spanked twice 1x06 Halloween - Falls from the ceiling, concussion, falls into Terrys arms, handcuffed, painfully slams onto table 1x07 48 Hours - Exhausted 1x08 Old School - Very hungover, aches/pain, reprimanded 1x09 Sals Pizza - Punched, manhandled, talks about childhood trauma 1x10 Thanksgiving - Talks about sad childhood x2, manhandled, choked 1x11 Christmas - Santa fight, held at gunpoint 1x12 Pontiac Bandit - Exhausted 1x14 Ebony Falcon - Chest bumped to the ground, worried, punched multiple times, numb arms 1x15 Operation Broken Feather - Denial, feels betrayed 1x17 Full Boyle - Pepper sprayed 1x18 The Apartment - Daddy issues, feels doomed from eventual homelessness 1x19 Tactical Village - Jealous, heartbroken 1x21 Unsolvable - Very sleep deprived, depressed/heartbroken, drunk 1x22 Charges and Specs - Very drunk, reprimanded, fired

2x01 Undercover - Picked up/arrested, punched, balls knee'd, cuts burn/pain, held at gunpoint, bummed 2x02 Chocolate Milk - Head manhandled, back issues from Terrys 'body slam,' exhausted x2, feelings hurt, tortured (forced to eat carrots) 2x03 The JimmyJab Games - Attacked by fire hydrants, still heartbroken 2x04 Halloween II - Robbed by bears, falls, hurt by barbedwire, arrested 2x05 The Mole - Feels betrayed, exhausted, slapped 2x06 Jake and Sophia - Hurts his hand 2x07 Lockdown - Passes out (flashback) 2x09 The Road Trip - Slapped 2x10 The Pontiac Bandit Returns - Daddy issues, gut punched 2x11 Stakeout - Punched 2x13 Payback - Exhausted, collapse, numb, sad 2x14 The Defense Rests - Heartbroken/depressed 2x15 Windbreaker City - Heartbroken/depressed, obsessive 2x17 The Boyle-Linetti Wedding - Finger pain, hearbroken 2x18 Captain Peralta - Major daddy issues, major denial, abandoned, feels hurt, confrontation 2x19 Sabotage - Suspended, feels betrayed, almost hit by a truck, held at gunpoint, kidnapped, restrained, gagged, life threatened, trust rooted daddy issues 2x20 AC_DC - Painful fall, limping the whole episode, cracked ribs/broken toes/thumb fractured, hit by box, extreme pain, addicted to work, hit by a car, hospitalized 2x21 Det. Dave Majors - Drinks really strong drink, annoyed, nervous, hurts his fingers, goat jumpscare

3x01 New Captain - Punched x3, briefly sad 3x05 Halloween III - Witch jumpscare, exhausted, throws up x2 3x06 Into The Woods - Falls, surrounded by poison ivy 3x09 The Swedes - Annoyed the whole episode, disgusted, briefly held at gunpoint 3x10 Yippie Kayak - Diehard situation, punched unconscious, hostage/restrained, headache, held at gunpoint, checked out by EMTs 3x11 Hostage Situation - Handcuffed/betrayed, daddy issues !??! 3x12 9 Days - Has Mumps, constant pain, drunk from cold medicine, delerious, mump painfully poked multiple times 3x14 Karen Peralta - Slams into multiple things, falls, major daddy issues, angry 3x15 The 9-8 - (Making Boyle jealous), uncomfortable between friends, punched, nards kicked, pain, tackled 3x16 House Mouses - Flattened by Scully, knocked unconscious, restrained 3x17 Adrian Pimento - Knife to throat/restrained, jumpscared, daddy issues, talks about therapy, held at gunpoint 3x19 Terry Kittens - Daddy issues, screaming scared, sleep deprived 3x21 Maximum Security - Worried, beaten up 3x22 The Bureau - Exhausted (1 pullup) 3x23 Greg and Larry - In danger, life threatened

4x01 Coral Palms, Pt.1 - Depressed, Holt jumpscare, hit by gokart, weird wrist, scared of snakes, tackled, reprimanded (redepressed) 4x02 Coral Palms, Pt.2 - Punched multiple times, headlocked 4x03 Coral Palms, Pt.3 - Falls over fence, calf scratched, queasy/gagging, (+great Holt bonding), throat punched, held at gunpoint, shot 4x04 The Night Shift - Crutches, hair intervention, picked up by Terry, limping, pain, falls over fence 4x05 Halloween IV - Terry jumpscare overreaction, betrayed 4x06 Monster in the Closet - Falls through roof 4x08 Skyfire Cycle - Relived trauma pantsing people 4x09 The Overmining - Angry 4x10 Captain Latvia - Cut palm (bleeding), thrown against a wall, unconscious 4x12 The Fugitive, Pt.2 - Betrayed, held at gunpoint 4x14 Serve & Protect - Feelings hurt 4x15 The Last Ride - Bruised thigh, crying 4x16 Moo Moo - Talks about depressing childhood 4x17 Cop-Con - Hungover, chest pain, literally on fire, gag/dizzy 4x18 Chasing Amy - Scared, worried, slams into bars 4x19 Your Honor - Claustrophobic, daddy issues 4x20 The Slaughterhouse - Water & milk drugged, extremely jittery 4x21 The Bank Job - Hungover, held at gunpoint, framed, arrested 4x22 Crime & Punishment - Hardcore framed

5x01 The Big House Pt.1 - Life threatened multiple times, jumpscared, aggressively beaten up x3 (limping/cuts), scared 5x02 The Big House Pt.2 - Solitary confinement, daddy issues/panic, blackmailed, life threatened multiple times, on meth, very jittery 5x03 Kicks - Daddy issues, nightmare, prison trauma, confession/suspends himself, sad 5x04 HalloVeen - Jumpscare x2, prison trauma, restrained, betrayed 5x06 The Venue - Daddy issues 5x07 Two Turkeys - Sad childhood + daddy issues 5x08 Return to Skyfire - Tired, painfully thrown to the wall 5x09 99 - Daddy issues 5x10 Game Night Pt.1 - Emotional 5x11 The Favor Pt.2 - Emotional/daddy issues 5x12 Safe House - Stir crazy, throat punched, tear off mustache pain, held at gunpoint, daddy issues 5x13 The Negotiation - Held at gunpoint, hostage, sad childhood, brokenheart 5x14 The Box - Embarrassed, relationship tested, angry outburst, hit by a chair, bloody nose 5x15 The Puzzle Master - Hand twisted, jealous, hand cramp 5x17 Dfw - Very nervous, shared daddy issues 5x18 Gray Star Matual - Intimidated 5x19 Bachelor/ette Party - Sickly drunk, guilt, heartbroken 5x20 Show Me Going - Daddy issues, worried, scared 5x21 White Whale - Stressed, 5x22 Jake & Amy - Life threatened, jealous, emotional

6x01 Honeymoon - Stressed 6x02 Hitchcock & Scully - Trapped 6x03 The Tattler - Annoyed, angry outburst, therapy denial, betrayed, angry 6x04 Four Movements - Body slammed, beaten up and sobbed offscreen, pain 6x05 A Tale of Two Bandits - Emotional 6x06 The Crime Scene - Bad childhood, sleep deprived, losing sanity, looks horrible, guilt 6x09 The Golden Child - Choking, heimliched, probably broken rib, punched unconscious, kidnapped 6x10 Gintars - Nervous, guilt 6x11 The Therapist - Massively in denial, hates therapists, held at gunpoint/captured, confesses, emotional 6x12 Casecation - Daddy issues/bad childhood, scared, life threatened (bomb) 6x13 The Bimbo - Emotional x2, bad childhood, height insecurity 6x14 Ticking Clocks - Arm punched x2 6x15 Return of the King - Feelings hurt, angry 6x16 Cinco de Mayo - Tazed x2, betrayed, emotions manipulated 6x17 Sicko - Career threatened x2, almost bit, insulted 6x18 The Suicide Squad - Punched, betrayed, imprisoned, depressed

7x01 Manhunter - Undermined 7x02 Captain Kim - Stepdaddy issues/trust issues x2 7x03 Pimemento - Scared of heights 7x04 The Jimmy Jab Games II - Falls from the ceiling, pain, trips, ceiling falls on him, extreme pain 7x05 Debbie - Knocked unconscious, restrained 7x06 Trying - Hungover, sad 7x07 Ding Dong - Daddy issues, uncomfortable the whole episode, emotional 7x08 The Takeback - Angry, feels betrayed, smushed, threatened 7x09 Dillman - Sad, framed 7x10 Admiral Peralta - Punched 7x11 Valloweaster - Trips, therapy 7x12 Ransom - Held at gunpoint, kidnapped, restrained/threatened