#especially if the moral was going to come across as ‘actually genetics to matter a little’

[astro-duck]

The finale of DuckTales is deeply flawed

I don’t know if I’m alone in thinking this, but I’ve always wanted to explain this to someone.

It’s not all bad. It’s actually an enjoyable watch, it’s fun and charming like most episodes are. The animation is incredible, even more so then it usually is, there’s lots of great moments that are really beautiful. I also enjoy a fair few of the plot moments, the one that stands out most to me is Scrooge immediately surrendering to Bradford the second he threatens to kill Donald, saying “it’s not worth the risk.” Really, all of Bradford’s eventual surrender to petty villainy is well done.

I will likely end up making a post talking more in-depth about why the finale is great, but that is not this post. This post is strictly about the flaws in the plot of the finale.

A few important notes:

I am not a genius media critic, I’m an asshole on Tumblr. This is entirely my opinion and if you love this episode/this one is your favorite I am genuinely happy for you. I understand that it can suck to have someone criticize your favorite piece of media, and if you don’t want to hear this then I don’t want you to hear it either. (/gen)

I, as a person, am very resistant to change. I find it difficult to cope with extreme changes to form in the media I love. I tried to look at this from a non-biased perspective, and I think I did a good enough job, but I’m sure my personal bias slipped through the cracks very frequently.

The very final episode made me cry, despite all this. I cried because the end credits were so sweet and I cried because it was over. I was watching the end credits and I cried. So, that’s something.

I will refer to the three part finale as “The episode” throughout, because this is the easiest way for me to understand it. I will specify if I am talking about a specific part, but for the most time it is just “This Episode” or “The finale”

Actual Episode Criticism:

I think May and June were a terrible idea. I think that the reveal that Webby is a F.O.W.L clone of Scrooge was also a terrible idea. I think the episode has too many plot twists and characters thrown in and it means hardly anything truly meaningful happens.

I believe that May and June were a harmful addition to the finale and the overall canon of the show. Strictly speaking from a finale perspective, they are completely new characters who take up a large portion of the finale of a show, especially in the first part. The episode should not have centered around new characters, but instead been a grand final adventure with the existing characters all having their moments, but especially showcasing the McDucks.

They divert so much of the time of the episode away from other characters that nobody else really gets to shine. Huey, Dewey and Louie sort of get replaced by Webby, May and June. They feel like the new triplets because it’s literally Webby and two clones of her. However, instead of being three distinct personalities, they’re all just literally clones of Webby, personality and all. I have nothing against Webby, but I don’t think having three of her running around taking up 60% of screen time in the finale was good.

The “Webby is a Scrooge Clone” thing is dumb as hell. Especially because Webby calls Scrooge “Dad” at the end of the end of the episode. I’ll get in to this more in a second, but it sort of shits on the message that family isn’t blood. I don’t think Webby needs to see Scrooge as a father. It also doesn’t make sense that they made her a girl, even though trans Scrooge/Webby is a good thought, it’s not canonical.

This is also another twist that they shouldn’t have thrown in last second, because it’s such a large idea to flesh-out. I’m glad they kept it for the finale though, strictly because I would not have enjoyed the arc of Scrooge and Webby being Father/Daughter. Especially because it doesn’t make sense, like if May and June are “sisters” to Webby and they’re clones of her, wouldn’t Scrooge be more like a brother? At least save Webby calling him “Uncle Scrooge” for this grand moment at the end, if you’re going to go to this terrible twist.

These two plots shit directly on the face of whatever message the show was saying up to that point, that “Family is just the people who love you.” Because when May and June show up, Webby immediately begins calling them her sisters because they have the same blood as her. She goes directly against the wishes of the people who, up to that point, were her actual family. Just for two girls who are F.O.W.L spies and who she doesn’t know.

Webby being genetically identical to Scrooge also flies in the face of this a little, because it makes it so that the Papyrus appearing to her, and Webby and Scrooge being family, arguable as being because they are genetically related. This is not the point the show is trying to make, but it still is an argument to be made. Why do they have to be biologically related at all? Why can’t they just be family?

Especially because this show had, for a while, done such a good job portraying non-standard family dynamics. An uncle raising his sister’s kids? A grandmother raising her (adopted) granddaughter? Both in non-standard environments? We don’t often see things like this casually portrayed. But with the return of Della and the Dad-ification of Scrooge it almost feels like they’re saying families aren’t complete without a mom or a dad. Even though they aren’t saying that, it’s still there.

Gosh this post is getting long. Last thing, nobody gets any screen time. So many characters are in this episode, and they had 60 minutes to use them all, but so much of it was dedicated to Webby, May and June that it’s nearly impossible for anybody else to get a complete arc. Webby and Huey are separated from the rest of the McDucks for a while, which would be fine except they don’t even really get a proper reunion. Webby doesn’t get one at all, and Huey gets a quick “I’m so happy to see you, I used your book to find you.” Before they are immediately captured again. Most of the cast actually spends a large portion of the part just before the climax in cells, not being a part of the action.

I mean, Gyro has a few references yo feeling like he’s “losing his touch” before it’s never a big deal again. Della is mad that Donald is leaving but they don’t ever talk about it and then Della just decides it’s okay. Donald never interacts with May and June before deciding to take them on his boat with Daisy. B.O.Y.D, Goaslyn, Violet and Lena don’t really do anything at all, except for B.O.Y.D and Lena having some plot point that no one else really would have been able to do (Reprogramming the Gizmoduck armor and making the ship invisible.) I think that the addition of these characters feels forced, when they should have been a natural addition to a grand adventure finale.

Overall:

May and June are unnecessary and hinder the other characters relationships and I don’t think Webby should be genetically related to Scrooge because then it feels less like “Found Family”. I think nobody gets enough screen time except Webby and her clones, but I don’t think they should have been the focus of the episode.

I’m sorry this post was so long, remember that I don’t hate watching this episode. I just think that the finale of my favorite cartoon should have been handled better.

[summerwritesfics]

🌎While We Escape Just To Survive

Pairing: None Length: 2091 Words Rating: Mature Warnings: Cyberpunk AU, On The Run, Escape, Fights, Starvation, Corrupt Military, Dystopia, Morally Dubious Science Experiments, Genetic Engineering, Human Experimentation, Human Weapon, Angst, Bi-Han Get’s His Ass Kicked By An Old Woman, Dine And Dashing, Simulations

Meanwhile In Another Universe Masterlist

Notes: So, uh, let’s face it, it was only a matter of time until I posted something cyberpunk-ish for this series given my bias for that genre. The three boys have been through some shit in this, Kuai definitely has had some horrible shit happen to him (because this is me, and despite how much I love him I’ve made it my life mission to make him suffer… because I love him 💕) Also sidenote, but my original draft for this I didn’t actually name Kung Lao or Raiden, refering to them as the man and the other man respectively, and reading it back I was like “oooh, I need to change this.” So, if their name drops seem a bit forced that’s why 😂 Fic title is from “Neo-Tokyo” by Scandroid. :)

Bi-Han’s eyes darted around the room. The teahouse was busy, groups of people huddled around tables as they ate and drank their cares away. Bi-Han wished he could join them, forget all his worries for the night and get so shitfaced he couldn’t walk straight. But they couldn’t relax, not when The Lin Kuei were still hot on their heels. Really stopping at all was risky, but it had been days since they’d last eaten, and Kuai Liang was already looking frail enough as it was.

“So. What exactly are we gonna do when we’re asked to pay?” Tomas questioned, although he kept his tone low. Bi-Han returned his attention to him. “We don’t have any money to pay for this.”

“We’re going to dip before they can even show us the bill,” Bi-Han informed him, leaning across the table.

“Thats- That doesn’t feel right to me,” Tomas muttered, shaking his head. “We’re just stealing at that point.”

“Well what else do you suggest we do?” Bi-Han asked roughly. Tomas shut his mouth and remained silent. “That’s what I thought.” Bi-han surveyed the teahouse again. “Besides, with how packed this place is, the owner’s probably making bank. Three street rats dipping on their payment won’t cause a dent.”

“They cannot take the money with them to the grave,” Kuai mused, completely out of nowhere, causing Bi-Han and Tomas to share a bemused glance. “And the grave is the final destination for all.”

This had been happening with alarming frequency since they’d escaped. Kuai Liang saying the weirdest, creepiest and most cryptic shit imaginable, completely unprompted. It was unnerving, especially coming from his once cheerful sunshine younger brother. But since they had been inducted into The Lin Kuei, his personality had changed. The Kuai that Bi-Han remembered was still there, he was still the sweet and kindly person he’d always been, yet there was also this morbid side that would slip out. And sometimes, even when Kuai was happy and smiling, his eyes looked vacant, like he was a million miles away.

Bi-Han didn’t know what experiments The Lin Kuei performed on his brother, but if he ever found out, he’d make sure they suffered the same fate a thousand times over.

“That aside,” Tomas began, shuffling in his seat like he was uncomfortable. “We’ll need to wait until the old woman who owns this place is distracted. She doesn’t feel like the type who’ll let us go without a fight.”

Bi-Han nodded, the woman in question was across the room, talking with two young men who’d walked in seconds earlier. It seemed she knew them, given how the three seemed to be laughing and joking with one another. Bi-Han glanced at their table, they’d all finished eating and there seemed like no better time than now to try and make an escape.

“She seems pretty distracted now.” Bi-Han declared, pushing himself to stand up. He grabbed Kuai’s arm to try and get him to get up with them. “Let’s go.”

His brothers silently agreed with him. He kept his grip on Kuai, somewhat scared of losing him somewhere in the crowd. He could see Tomas from the corner of his eye, as the three of them tried to make a quick exit. They were so close, they just had to make it to the door.

And then the old lady stepped out in front of them with her arms crossed over her chest.

“And where exactly do you three think you’re going?” She questioned, glaring at them like they were lower than dirt.

“Uh, we were just going to get some fresh air,” Tomas immediately chimed in, although the grimace on his face gave him away. Dammit Tomas. He always was the worst liar of the three of them.

“Oh of course. You’ll be free to get all the fresh air you like, once you pay your bill.”

Bi-Han hissed, letting go of Kuai and stepping forward, keeping himself tall and trying to look as dangerous as he could muster.

“Move out of our way,” he growled, the threat implied by his tone. “And I won’t have to hurt you.”

“Do not try me, young man,” she snapped back, pointing her finger at him. “You wouldn’t stand a chance.”

Bi-Han felt his rage rising, and before he even registered what he was doing his fist was flying towards her face. He was surprised when rather than hitting his target, her hand darted up and grabbed his wrist, stopping him in his tracks. He tried pulling back, but damn was this woman far stronger than she looked.

He attempted to punch her with his other hand, only for the same thing to happen again. Except she suddenly released his first wrist and got in a punch herself. He stumbled back slightly, only to feel himself flying forward as she yanked on the wrist she still had a hold of. He sloppily threw his fist again, completely missing her.

A leg swept at his feet and he hit the floor. The woman stood above him and he threw yet another punch, just for her to yet again catch it. This time, she flipped him over onto his stomach. There was a pressure on his lower back, realising she was sitting on top of him, bending his arm behind him so far his shoulder began to ache in protest.

“Get off me!” He thrashed, but stopped when he almost dislocated his shoulder. “I’ll fucking kill you!”

“Madame Bo!” Bi-Han looked up to see the two young men who’d been talking to her run over. “What’s going on?”

“Just a few street rats attempting to dine and dash, Raiden, nothing to worry about.” She yanked on Bi-Han’s arm, and he gave a pained and angry scream.

“Wait, please, we’re sorry,” Tomas tried, holding his arms in front of him. “We haven’t eaten in weeks and we have no money.”

“That may be so,” Madame Bo huffed, “but if you have no money, you should not come into a restaurant. I have bills to pay too, you know?”

“We are so sorry,” Tomas pleaded, and Bi-Han shot him the dirtiest look he could. The fact he was pandering to these people was pissing him off. “We don’t have a way to pay, but we’ll make it up to you.”

Madame Bo scoffed, until one of the two men, the one who wasn’t Raiden, cleared his throat, “how about we pay for their meal, would that de-escalate this situation?”

“You boys would really do that?” Madame Bo questioned, raising an eyebrow at them. Both of them nodded. She gave an annoyed sigh, as she commented “you two are too good for this world, and certainly too good for people like this.”

“Fuck you!” Bi-Han growled and he began to struggle again. “We don’t need your fucking handouts.”

“Bi-Han, it’s either let them pay or get your arm broken,” Tomas pointed out, desperation in his voice. Bi-Han was ready to scream at him, until he looked at Kuai Liang.

He wasn’t even watching the scene in front of him, his eyes fixed somewhere else, completely glazed over. Shit. 

“Fine,” He spat out, “just get this crazy old bitch off of me!”

Finally Madame Bo let go of his arm and got off his back. He pushed himself to sit up, Tomas running to his side to help him. Meanwhile, Kuai didn’t move. Madame Bo walked over to the two boys, wiping down her dress with her hands and glaring over her shoulder at Bi-Han.

“That’s Madame Crazy Old Bitch to you,” she snapped, and Bi-Han jerked forward to attack her again, only for Tomas to grab the back of his shirt and stop him.

“How much do they owe you?” The man asked, getting out his payment card.

“150 credits, Kung Lao” she said, and the guys eyebrows raised at that.

“Only 150 credits? Shit, I spend triple that on just myself.” Kung Lao passed the card over to Madame Bo before looking toward Tomas and Bi-Han. “You really can’t afford 150 credits?”

Well no, because we’re homeless and jobless and on the fucking run from a corrupt military sect. 

As much as Bi-Han wished that was his answer, instead he just bared his teeth at the man.

“We tried to spend as little as we could so the damages would be as low as possible,” Tomas lied. They hadn’t really thought that far ahead, it was more that they’d just got enough to maybe keep them going for a couple more days.

While Kung Lao began to generally converse with Madame Bo about the bill, Raiden was preoccupied with Kuai Liang. When Bi-Han looked towards his brother, he was still staring vacantly at nothing. He’d had moments like this, but not for as long as this seemed to have lasted.

“Uh, hey,” Raiden started, reaching a hand forward to touch Kuai’s shoulder. His entire body tensed and his eyes widened. “Are you okay?”

“Is this real?” Kuai asked, voice sounding panicked, head snapping to the man beside him. “Or… Am I just going to wake up in that laboratory again?”

Laboratory? Bi-Han’s gut twisted and he rushed to his feet. Stumbling a little, Tomas grabbed him before he fell to the floor again. He reached for Kuai, taking his face in his hands. Kuai looked at him with watery eyes.

“You always die,” Kuai whispered, blinking and causing the tears to roll down his cheeks. “They always make sure I can’t save you, and you die.” Kuai’s hands came up to grab his wrists. “And then there is fire, and burning, and it hurts but I can’t stop it because it’s coming from me.”

“Kuai Liang,” Bi-Han breathed out, he had no idea what to say. “I’m okay. I’m not dead yet.”

“But you will. One day.” He nuzzled against Bi-Han’s hands and gripped him just a little tighter. “And I don’t know that I will be able to hold back. I am The Scorpion. My destiny is to turn the world to ash.”

“What?” Madame Bo questioned, and when Bi-Han turned to look at her, she was looking… terrified .

“Sorry, he’s not been the same since-“ Tomas began and stopped himself, realising that explaining too much would give away who they were and what they were running from. “He’s just very unwell right now.”

Madame Bo approached them again, slapping Bi-Han’s hands away from Kuai. He had no idea why he complied. She gently angled Kuai’s head towards her.

“What is your designation?” She asked, and Bi-Han immediately went cold.

“LK-520,” Kuai said without hesitation. Bi-Han’s head was screaming at him to do something. If she knew to ask for a designation, that meant she was familiar with The Lin Kuei’s ways. It meant she could call them to collect the brothers.

And yet, the way she pursed her lips, how gently she pat Kuai’s head. Bi-Han got the feeling she wasn’t going to rat them out.

“Oh. I’m so sorry, boy.” She closed her eyes and sighed, before turning slightly to Bi-Han. “You three are Lin Kuei.”

“Lin what?” Kung Lao questioned, but Madame Bo ignored them.

“Please,” Bi-Han whispered, reaching to grab Kuai’s hand. “Please don’t tell them where we are.”

“I won’t tell them a thing,” she assured him. “I am just like you.” Bi-Han paused at that. Did she just admit to being a Lin Kuei runaway? It would explain how she was such a skilled fighter. “I never thought they’d actually go through with the Scorpion Project. It was barbaric, even by their standards.”

“I am so confused right now,” Raiden complained, rubbing his head like it was hurting him.

“They did something to him,” Bi-Han explained, ignoring the man completely in favour of Madame Bo. “I don’t know what but-“

“We should not talk of such things in the open,” Madame Bo told him in a hushed tone. Her hand went to take Kuai Liang’s. “Come into the back room. I can explain everything.” Her eyes flicked over to the two men. “To you two as well.”

And with that, she was walking across the teahouse, gently pulling Kuai behind her. Bi-Han sighed and looked at Tomas. Silently, it seemed they agreed this was about as good as this situation was going to get. So, they followed, hoping to god they’d get answers to what had happened to Kuai in that God forsaken laboratory.

Although Bi-Han had a terrible feeling the truth would be worse than he could have imagined.

[bonesaldente]

Ferocious I Darth Maul x Reader

Chapter 6: The Interrogation

last chapter

all chapters

ao3

words: ~1800

_____

He hears the prisoner before he sees her. The woman who was so inconspicuous in the throne room is now cursing him, the troopers, and the entire Republic out at the top of her longs, her voice echoing through the corridor. At least he highly suspects it is her voice; it is undistorted and clear, much lighter than the voice he remembers.

“... And your brothers and every single person who has taken part in this, no mercy, no survivors, and if you think you can-”

The angry ranting stops at once when Obi-Wan steps into the woman’s view.

For a moment, his breath is taken away. This face… It is like he is back on Naboo, carrying the lifeless body of Master Qui-Gon. The memory hits him hard and unexpectedly, causing him to falter in his step for the fraction of a second before he regains his composure.

“You,” the woman looks daggers at him through the force field that separates her from the outside, suddenly not looking like the woman he remembers at all but much more like how one would expect Spectress to look like under that signature mask, except for much more… human. And vulnerable.

He does not like the swell of pity he senses rising in himself when he catches a glimpse of her bloodshot eyes and the bruising on her cheek - after all, she stood by and watched as Satine was killed, slaughtered by Maul, and even appealed for his own execution.

But Revenge is not the Jedi Way… And neither is resentment, no matter the deed.

“General,” The guards salute him. “We have confiscated her belongings and searched them for any tracking devices.”

“And you are certain that she is unarmed?”

“We’ve run several scans, sir.”

“Good.”

He assesses the situation briefly, taking in her hands that are cuffed to the table.

“Open the cell, I wish to speak to her.”

She has stopped speaking, only glowering at him when he enters the claustrophobic space.

“You got a lot of nerve-”

“Please,” he interrupts, sitting down. “Do not make this any harder than it needs to be.”

“I am- It was you who kidnapped me!” Her features are contorted in rage and with it, her light accent shines through otherwise flawless Basic.

“Kidnapped?” Obi-Wan questions. “You have multiple open arrest warrants and were complicit in the violent takeover of Mandalorian rule-”

“That took place in a neutral system and is thus not under Republic jurisdiction if I have to remind you. Besides, it was Pre Vizsla who pushed your duchess off her throne,” Her voice takes on another, more malicious undertone while she widens her eyes mockingly sweet, “Obi.”

The old nickname stings more than he would like to admit, especially coming from someone who was there when it happened, but he forces himself to remain objective... and fair.

“We have a few questions for you. If you cooperate and answer them truthfully, we will be able to lower your sentence considerably.”

Considering she is responsible for the assassinations of multiple senators, her prison sentence is still going to be at least two digits, but there could be worse things. Aside from that, Obi-Wan has seen how quickly one could escape from prison. Somebody like Spectress, who is already known for being one of the... craftier faces of the underground could probably-

“Lower my sentence?” She sounds almost offended. “After you unlawfully took me from my planet? I don’t think so.”

His heart sinks when it becomes painfully obvious that she will do anything but cooperate, even though he expected that going into it.

The prisoner leans forward on her elbows, a dangerous glint in her eyes. “You will regret this, Kenobi:”

“Look, as much as you may dislike this, we have the upper hand here. We can start simple. Your name?”

“None of your concern.”

“Since you have committed crimes against the Republic, it is, actually.”

She rolls her eyes shifting away from him again, unresponsive.

“Perhaps something else, then. What do you know of the creation of the clone army?”

“The clones?” The mercenary furrows her brows. “What would I know of them? And why would you care, isn’t it you they work for?”

He chooses to ignore her last question, instead pushing further.

“We know you were acquainted with Jango Fett, and that you’ve been to the facilities on Kamino.”

She only quirks an eyebrow, in turn ignoring him.

“Pardon my choice of words, the clones don’t work for you, I forgot. They don’t get paid, do they?”

“What was your relationship with Fett?”

“Again, none of your concern. Hey, you!” The woman looks over his shoulder at one of the two guards standing by the cell. “Do you get paid for this? And did you choose to risk your life for people who don’t even care about you?”

Obi-Wan glances at the trooper, Flamer if he recalls correctly, who remains unmoving, though his back straightens almost unnoticeably.

“Again, it is my concern. Were you related?” She scoffs in response. “Were you a client? Partners? Lovers?”

The last word makes her grimace in distaste.

“We were friends, Kenobi, a concept I’m sure must be quite foreign to the likes of you.”

“Friends?” He raises an eyebrow. At last, something to go off of. “Do you know who hired Fett as a genetic donor?”

Her eye twitches.

“I find it quite presumptuous of you to be asking me all these things… After all, it was one of your Jedi knights who decapitated him. Perhaps if you had been more considerate then, you’d now be able to ask him yourself.”

For a moment, heavy silence hangs in the room like a cloud of smoke. “But you can’t,” she concludes. “Because you murdered him.”

Oh, her tone is so bitter, Obi-Wan knows his death struck her hard, even though it had been years back.

“I do not believe he was solely a friend of yours,” He comments. “I think he was more than that, or you would not be so caught up on his passing.”

“His violent murder? You are correct, it was quite memorable, not only to me but also to his son,” she spits. “I believe you’ve met him, haven’t you? How does it feel knowing one of you slaughtered his father before his own two eyes? How can the Jedi be so morally condescending after all the families they have ripped apart?”

“Your family amongst them?”

“Numerous families, Kenobi. And yes, most recently, you have torn me from whatever I had on Mandalore.”

“Did you consider Jango Fett family?” He presses on further.

“Does it matter? Certainly not to you, right?”

“We are trying to get to the bottom of a case here,” he explains calmly. “And any information you have may prove to be useful.”

“Why would I help you?” She snorts. “To get one life sentence instead of two? A cell with a window? An autograph from the famed Jedi general himself?”

Obi-Wan has a strong urge to bury his face in his hands in frustration. Instead, he puts on the kindest smile he can muster at this moment.

“Because I believe that you, contrary to popular opinion, do have morals. We are looking into something that goes deeper than a simple feud you have with our order, even deeper than the hatred Maul harbors for it… and me.” He closes his eyes for a second to reflect.

“I am asking you, in all seriousness, if you can give us anything that could possibly point us in the right direction.”

The woman looks at him differently now. The constant scowl is gone from her features, replaced by a slight frown.

“You speak of the Sith.”

“What do you know of them?”

She glares at him. “More than you.”

“Then I take it you know who the master is?”

Something flashes across her face, brief enough to miss it if he blinked. Silence ensues as she seems to ponder, intense eyes focused on something invisible in the air

He holds his breath, feeling the revelation so close.

“I…” she finally begins hesitantly, “He is-” She gulps and goosebumps rise on Obi-Wan’s spine when he sees her fingertips tremble against the metal table, wondering who could have the ability to instill this much fear in a person.

Her mouth opens to continue, but no words come out. She blinks in confusion, trying again and looking down to the side when the words refuse to leave her mouth.

“He is… he controls…” The words come out in a strained voice, but before she reveals concrete information, she starts choking as if something is closing around her windpipe.

True, sincere panic fills her eyes when her hands struggle against their restraints as she attempts to claw at the invisible force around her throat. Intuitively, Obi-Wan reaches out, despite there being no physical enemy. His hand drops when she flinches away from him, too, but in that moment the invisible attack ceases and she gasps for air, slumping forward, facing the sterile floor.

Neither party speaks for a minute.

“I can’t help you,” the woman eventually states, voice hoarse. “Just know you face an evil of a scale that you can’t… comprehend yet.”

The atmosphere has gone through such a complete change that Obi-Wan feels it is unwise to continue the interrogation much longer.

“Thank you for your cooperation.”

“I am not cooperating,” she hisses, right back to being the renowned mercenary. “I just know we have a common enemy. Which does not” Her glare tells him she knows he was about to make a hopeful comment about working together, “make us allies. I still despise you and everything you stand for.”

“Well, it was lovely talking to you. We will resume tomorrow.” He pushes the metal chair back, moving to stand up.

“Wait.”

The urgency in her voice makes him freeze for a moment.

“Something else you would like to tell me?”

“Give it back.”

“Give what back?”

“My stuff, Kenobi. You have taken several of my possessions, some of which were,” she curls her lip, “of value to me.” “What exactly are you talking about? Perhaps if you show more willingness to work with us in the future, something could be arranged.”

“For one, I want my anonymity back, but you destroyed that option when you took away my mask while I was unconscious.”

The last words are delivered with force, her gaze downright deadly.

“But that’s not all. You took something else, something of… sentimental value.”

She glances at her hands.

“When I was kidnapped by your rebel friends, I was wearing a ring on my right hand and somebody took it. All I want is to have it back, is that too much to ask for?”

A ring? He didn’t expect a request so… mundane.

He gives her one last look before turning and leaving the cell.

“We will talk tomorrow.”

“Can’t wait.”

_____

notes: Whew, quite a bit of dialogue in this one, though I have to admit that I do really enjoy writing it :)

See you all next week ~

@princessayveke @spaghetti-666 @noiralei @larawl @secretnerd00 @bagpipes606 @zabrak-show @brilliantbutbatty @eleine-t1d 

[wolf-heart1197]

MASS EFFECT DS9 CROSSOVER PLEASE SHARE SOME THOUGHTS

You have. Opened a can of worms, friend.

WELL.

Ok so as far as set up i was picturing like. Wormhole/space magic shenanigans bringing the Normandy to DS9, set somewhere during that little window after Shep and Co. return from the Suicide Mission at the end of 2, but before Shep turns themself in to the Alliance.

The Normandy, badly damaged, limping up to this mysterious space station theyve never seen or heard of before, don't even recognize the outline or architecture, but hey at least they seem to be friendly? And they're offering to help fix our ship and get us back where we need to be so I guess they aren't all bad?

So then Shep and crew are stranded on DS9 for at LEAST a couple weeks while they try to get the Normandy fixed up, and allllll the shenanigans the respective crews get into, especially once they start interacting with each other

-There's the obvious of course, Shepard and Sisko would get along fantastically, I think. Both the leaders of crews of mixed bags, sometimes trying to get them to work together is like herding cats. Strong cats with guns and opinions, but at the end of the day they really are kind of a family, aren't they?

-Both are able to understand what was supposed to be one (relatively) simple mission turning into way more lives at stake than they signed up for (Shep with. Well. The entire events of the trilogy, but then Sisko too. Bring Bajor into the Federation. Thats it, that was the mission, but suddenly we're at war with a frankly stronger superpower from another quadrant and suddenly one station is supposed to be the head of it all? The pressure. The lives at stake if they fail. Yeah.)

As for the rest of the crew:

-The next obvious, I think, would Grunt and Worf. Very different methods and cultures, obviously. I'm not saying they'd necessarily GET ALONG even, but there'd be a mutual respect there, I think. Both coming from warrior races, fighting is in their blood, its what they know. And theyre both outsiders to their own culture, being raised primarily if not exclusively by Someone Else, having to fight for their right to have a place amongst their own people. There's a shared strength in that.

-Mordin and Garak, and their shared past as spies. Garak's penchant for lying with every other word out of his mouth vs Mordin's tendency to only say about half of the words in his sentences, each trying to weasel the truth out of the other. Each at the very least recognizing that theyve done horrible things in their past, but not necessarily having regrets for them. Well, no regrets they're willing to admit to.

-BUT THEN ALSO Mordin and Jadzia, really just. Best Science Bros. Mordin can be extremely focused, which I think might turn Jadzia off of him at first, up until she catches him singing under his breath while he works. And once their discussions start trending more towards the importance of art and culture alongside scientific advancement is when they really start to shine together. Also I think Mordin would be absolutely FASCINATED by the Trill, the symbiotic relationship and the symbiont carrying memories across hosts, how the symbionts and hosts merge, etc. Nothing like that really exists in the ME universe

-Julian and Dr. Chakwas could talk some about medicine, certainly, barring nothing else about the differences in their respective medical technology. But I think ultimately she would get tired of his attitude, and he would decide she didn't really have anything new to teach him.

-Julian, I think, would be much more interested in spending time with EDI and Legion. I mean, consider how he was in the one TNG episode, when he got to meet Data? He would be over the moon especially for a chance to study legion. The Geth Collective is genuinely an interesting idea, and I think he would be fascinated by the varrying levels of simulated intelligence, but without individuality. EDI would be an interesting study, because this would be before she got the mech body, so she would still for all intents and purposes "be" the Normandy. A ship as a living entity? With emotional attachment to the crew inside? Absolutely fascinating. And if it were a bit alter on that this happens? She has wants! And fears! Absolutely fascinating!

-Dr. Chakwas, on the other hand, would probably end up spending her time with Keiko O'Brien. Swapping stories about their times being forced to be on the relative sidelines, having to watch all the horrible things their loved ones are constantly dealing with and only being able to do so much. Keiko's exasperation with Miles and Chakwas' with Joker. (And Shepard). Plus really i just like to imagine them having tea together ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

-Kira Thane and Mordin I can picture spending hours upon hours deep in discussion, about ethics and morality and religion, and how the hell you're supposed to reconcile it all when you have so much darkness in your past.

-Kira and Thane, especially, have a lot to talk about. Kira fighting in the resistance her whole life vs Thane being raised as a living weapon, both deeply spiritual and refusing to believe that their respective peaces are denied to them, that they can still find their own redemption and make up for their pasts.

-Joker would spend a lot of time trying to avoid Julian, who I think would be very insistent on wanting to study his Vrolik's syndrome, and possibly trying to cure it. Joker really Does Not Like Him.

-Tali would inevitably spend a lot of time together with Miles, because assumedly they'd be working on fixing the Normandy together (when Miles isnt busy trying to fix one of DS9's 50 million other problems). I don't know that they'd honestly have much in common aside from engineering-related stuff, but they're both geniuses in their respective versions of their fields and comparing the 2 universe's technologies alone could take more discussion time than they would have.

-I don't think Jack would. Actually try to get along with anyone. I see her spending the vast majority if her time camping out in a holosuite trying to program it to let her kill simulations of everyone she's pissed at.

-Miranda and Julian. The two genetically engineered kids. Yeah there'd be a lot to talk about there. Parent drama? Feeling like you have something to prove?? Trying to find the "you" underneath the genetic tampering??? Yeah they'd get along.

-Ok hear me out on this but. I really think Garrus and Garak would end up having a lot in common. I mean, think about it: Cardassian military/goverment/cultural structure compared to the Turians? Love of state above all else, everything is for the State (but then family above even that). And on a more personal level? Getting into a profession, a LIFE, to impress your father and then it still isn't good enough, nothing will ever be good enough, so you keep trying and going to more and more extremes to be good enough and still nothing matters. And you haven't given up on your people, no, never, but they sure have seemed to give up on you, in a way, haven't they? Exiled (Garak), ignored at every turn (Garrus), but hey, here's this one human at least that'll listen to you, and maybe even help you where others won't, so maybe things aren't all bad? Garak lies through his teeth at every turn, Garrus knows this, but he knows where to pick up the specs of truth, too.

-Jacob, bless his soul, gets roped into "babysitting" Jake and Nog. Jake distracts him by taking advantage of his chill exterior, just long enough for Nog to set off chaos halfway across the station. Cue montage of Jacob chasing the boys up and down the Promenade.

...that's all I got I am. Definitely willing to discuss more/get add-ons to this/hear other people's ideas!!!

Man this got long ajxhahavxhs

[aclosetfan]

For the Salty asks: 1, 3, 5 and 6?

Thanks so much for playing along! Ima be real with you 2 out of the 4 questions you asked really opened up a can of worms for me, and I’m so sorry. I put the less stressful ones first, and the other two are under the cut! Anyway, these were super fun to answer, but plz don’t hate me for it!! 😂😂

for anyone wondering, here’s the ask list: Salty Asks List 

3. Have you ever unfollowed someone over a fandom opinion?

lmao yeah. It’s petty, but honestly, people’s personal morals really bleed through into their fandom opinions, and I’m not willing to put up with any unnecessary hate, especially in environments that are supposed to be fun. I’ve even blocked a few people. In the ppg fandom specifically, I’ve blocked a person who, I guess, thought it was necessary to try to gate-keep with racist/sexist/etc. terminology and ideologies, and I truly don’t have time for that 🤷‍♀️ (a lot of people probs know who I’m vaguing, but if you don’t, you’re lucky)

I can’t say I’ve ever unfollowed anyone for any innocent/not-in-conflict-with-my-morals fandom opinions. Usually, if I don’t agree with something, I just keep scrolling because lol whatever. Everyone’s entitled to their own opinion.

but ngl I have unfollowed people who just get annoying 😬😬 lol

6. Has fandom ever made you enjoy a pairing you previously hated?*

I went into this fandom without having too many preferences, so I didn’t have a pairing that I’ve previously hated!

I guess I could say that while I never really hated them, the color-mixing and color-clashing ships weren’t ever on my radar until I came across the fandom content. Now, I really like them! Particularly, Brick and Bubbles!

1. What OTPs in your fandom(s) do you just not get?*

Before anyone gets pissed off at me, before you get into my answer for this question, I’d like to really stress that you’ve got to go into it with absolutely zero fanon context. Like, erase all your headcanons from your mind. I’m dead serious. Because I literally DO NOT get why ANY rrbxppg ship would realistically work ever.

Okay, canonically, these six little funky science experiments were dead set on ending each other. The boys were absolutely horrible to the girls. And the girls literally KILL the boys. I know in fairytale romances, nothing stops love, but bruh, it’s hard to come back from murder 😂 And yeah, I know Clipsville showed the girls and the boys together as older teenagers, and they weren’t trying to kill each other, but that was an obvious gag. In the documentary, it was revealed that that particular “clip” was made because a bunch of people wanted the boys and girls to interact again, and CN gave into the demand. (also, lol I know it super embarrassing, but I did watch the documentary. I just really like Craig McCracken) I just don’t think that realistically a canon pairing between the two sets of triplets would ever be considered a healthy relationship. 

Also, ethically, I just—okay listen, I go back and forth with this allllll the time, but the ppgxrrb ships make me confront the “Would I sleep with my clone?” question way too often. Depending on my self-esteem, the answer changes each time. Like sometimes I’m like fuck yeah I would! Other times I’m like, ew, no, I’d have to consider my clone as a twin! I know counterparts aren’t technically clones, BUT the boys really do come across as identical to the girls in the show. The only difference really is their moral alignment (I’m nixing any gender argument). So, I’m like, omg, can I honestly pair these six together in any way??? Are they too close to each other genetically in some sense for this to be morally right??? Like if you ship Brick and Buttercup together, would that just essentially be shipping Brick and Butch/Blossom and Buttercup together in some messed up way??? Is Brick just Blossom, and Blossom just Brick?? Is it better just to ship color-matching instead of mixing???  

On top of all of that, wouldn’t the boys and girls be pseudo cousins since Mojo was the Professor’s lab monkey? Technically, in canon, Mojo ends up being both sets of triplets “creator,” so could the rrb and the ppg be considered siblings of some sort? Some of you are probably like, wow, calm down. Stop thinking about it. They’re science experiments. It’s not so deep. Which I get, but I can’t stop, so let me hit you with something ten times worse: should the girls (or the boys) actually be considered biological siblings? Does sugar, spice, and everything nice make you genetically related? Nothing put in the stirring pot was organic—just a bunch of chemicals. If you ship the boys and girls together this could be a good thing! BUT, but, could some sick fuck use this information to somehow justify shipping siblings (ppgxppg or rrbxrrb) together??? This is a literal nightmare to think about!!

All in all, I can’t think about these pairings too much without getting caught up in the logistics of their existence even if they’re fictional lmaoooo! If it wasn’t for the fandom, I wouldn’t ship them together at all. I just think it’s amazing that the ships took off like they did lol, because their literal (fictional) existence is just one giant mind fuck for me. Anyway, I ship them at the end of the day, but tbh I do it with a bit of a guilty conscience. Is it morally correct to ship clone-like counterparts? Or should counterparts be treated like twins? Does it even fucking matter at the end of the day, it’s just fiction? I don’t know the right answer. But I do know the pairings don’t make sense. 

Aside from the ppgxrrb, I don’t think there are many other BIG fandom wide pairings. Still, I just want to say that I don’t get why people ship Ace and Buttercup together. The pairing sounds off a few major alarms in my head for obvious reasons. There’s also a bunch of crack ships that involve crossovers with other cartoons. Generally, I don’t mind them, but it seems popular to ship Aku (from Samurai Jack) and Blossom together. And I’m real sorry to those devoted shippers, but again I do NOT get it. I see a lot of romantic fan art depicting romantic situations with Blossom still drawn as a child, and like I get Aku is an immortal demon, so “age is just a number,” but again, BIG ALARMS go off in my head.

5. Has fandom ever ruined a pairing for you?*

🙃 🙃 Kind of don’t want to answer this, but I will anyway because only a few people actually read my blog lolol, so lol, yep! And it’s the reds. Don’t shoot me lol. When I was in middle school, I got into this fandom, forgot about it, and then came back when I was hit by a round of nostalgia. I’m finishing up college now, and I can confidentially say that the fanon content for the reds hasn’t changed one bit. Or the demand for it.

I tended to find that a lot of red content follows many archetypes that I’m just not into. Their stories can get a real cringey, real fast. Blossom is always written like this “perfect, except she’s not (but she really is)” character. Like she’s the girl you WISH you could be, but she’s also going through a shit ton of stuff that no person IRL would be able to handle without having a mental breakdown. And sometimes, in some stories, Blossom does have a mental breakdown, but in a sexy way, so she’s still perfect. Generally, there’s still something problematic about Blossom that makes it easy for a reader to relate to her on some level, unlike the way people write Bubbles. And then there’s Brick, who’s broody, hyper-possessive or jealous, and hot figuratively and literally (gotta love the fire/ice trope). He’s the only boy—no! Wait!—the only person who could ever possibly outwit Blossom, and he is just so undeniably attracted to Blossom. They’re the smart power couple that should honestly just hook-up in Chapter One to save everybody time, but they don’t. Nah, they’ve got to survive at least two love triangles before they even consider admitting they’re attracted to each other.  

And don’t get me wrong, none of that’s bad, but there are a million fanfics that go through the same song and dance with these two. And it’s kind of easy to tell when someone’s hardcore projecting onto Blossom because the type of person they’re personally attracted to is the way they write Brick. And I’m not knocking anyone self-projecting onto characters, sometimes people got to do that to give themselves a fun mental break, but bro, I don’t want to read about it. For one, smart broody assholes aren’t my type. Maybe when I was in middle school, but not anymore. And two, it’s just not interesting to me, which is a real shame since the reds are a majority of the fanon content.

Maybe if I found more red stories where the plot isn’t character-driven but plot-driven, so I see the romance between these two characters in a context where it’s not the main focus of the story, it would solve my issue with the pairing. I haven’t found many fics like that, though.

I can’t really think of any reds fic where I’m like ey, this aint bad unless it has a “major character death” tag attached to it lmao (which are always plot driven stories). However, in all honesty, since I’ve stayed away from red content for a while now, I don’t know the current state of things. Maybe there’s been a load more development for these two, or people have broken away from the same plotlines, but I’m too busy to check. I do browse people’s fic rec lists from time to time, but it sort of feels like everyone just puts the same fics on their lists and moves on.

And before someone’s like, “well, you can say all this about the greens or the blues,” just know I’m fully aware. The greens make me cringe too because there’s a shit ton of possessive and abusive storylines filling their story tags. And what makes me super uncomfortable is how people make Buttercup hit Butch or call him derogatory names, oftentimes unprompted. I don’t know why people make Buttercup such an unlikeable and overly aggressive person. I also don’t get why they make Butch some perverted idiot, but to each their own, I guess? Still, I see these green-character patterns most often in red-focused stories, which is another reason why I avoid them. I’ve found a lot of green-focused content that strays from the abusive tropes I try to avoid. Considerably less than I’d like, but the greens are typically the b-plot pairing, so that’s to be expected. Personally, I’d really like to see more content with the greens finding some kind of inner peace, and recently, I’ve seen a few fics that have tried to tackle this concept.

And lol, if you’ve read some of my posts before, you already know that I think the blues are an underdeveloped fanon pairing. The fandom can’t ruin that pairing for me because it never does anything substantial with it.  

Anyway, at the end of the day, I’m just personally not into the way the reds are popularly written, but I get why people are and that’s good with me. 

[nosybookworm]

Ninja Academy vs Hero School Rant

Naruto was my jam back in the day. I stayed up late to watch the new episodes, bought the dvd box sets and manga volumes, collected toys and cards just to stare at adoringly, even pretended to be sick so that I could stay home and watch a Naruto marathon. Point is, I LOVED Naruto.

I was invested in the characters. My heart ached for every single character that gave me a backstory. I ugly cried on more than ten occasions.

The action and moral dilemmas sucked me in and spit me out, made me the person I am today thinking critically about the stuff I love because wow that universe is in no way safe or sane for the people living in it lol.

The villains absolutely TERRIFIED me DESPITE STILL WANTING TO SEE MORE OF THEM, Orochimaru alone had me sleeping with the lights on and ripping the arms off his action figure just to be safe.

When I started watching My Hero Academia those old happy feelings started slapping me in the face drawing me in. MHA hits a lot of the same points that Naruto had and I didn’t really notice until the end of season 3 because those points weren’t as in-your-face or emotionally impactful as it was in Naruto I guess. Not to say it didn’t have an impact! Just that it rolled off me a lot easier which might just be a me problem.

I Mean:

The main character getting bullied/excluded because of something he can’t control. 

Underdog character then meeting or making an emotional connection with a mentor figure truly feeling “acceptance” for maybe the first time and taking that all important first step toward their life long dream. 

A teacher willing to sacrifice himself to protect the students. 

A school training teens to protect/serve. 

Rivalry that may or may not be actual friendship.

Students fighting against each other to “rank up” by showing how capable they are to their superiors.

Enemies invading to terrorize the kids and escaping to terrorize another day.

Traumatic family backstories that child will now attempt to seek justice through own power.

Previous underdog character actually having a secret power that no one knows about but a select few and that he has to train to learn how to use, but it makes him a powerhouse that is always surprising the enemy and inspiring his fellows.

Sure all that can be tied to any story when generalized like this, but the way MHA presents them is pretty similar to Naruto.

(Okay, ALL OF THIS is going to be my personal opinion. Things I want to say to get out of my system so that I can move on. It’s long too. So, now that you’ve been warned continue on.)

The more I got into it the stranger it felt because despite hitting those same points I loved they hit in a different way that....well... made me a little uncomfortable to sit through.

Like Aizawa

Very clearly the Kakashi in MHA. He’s sly hardly ever telling his students the truth but has incredibly high expectations of them, has been known to expel students left and right until his most recent batch of kids, is ready and willing to throw himself in harms way for them, and surprisingly competent despite his exhausted persona/personality. However the way these two teachers act get two very different results from me. Naruto got a chance to introduce Kakashi in a way that endeared him to me, the bell test was more than just showcasing the kids current abilities it was introducing Kakashi (the Jounin that is a kind of jack of all trades, the known perv that will publicly read porn, the guy that will happily mess with a bunch of kids to “teach them a lesson” and because its funny, the guy that requires the students under his care to care about each other because caring for his team matters to him more than any mission, that guy). MHA gave the quirk test. Aizawa mostly in the background taking notes and jotting down scores after his speech about expelling whoever comes last. We didn’t get to hear Aizawa’s thoughts until the very end when Izuku surprised him. 

I didn’t really feel any connection toward Aizawa until I stumbled across fanfics that wrote him more involved with the students and I think that’s the problem. Aizawa is dedicated to his student’s education, he believes they will all be amazing heroes one day, but he hardly ever interacts with them. He can be seen watching their training from afar, sleeping in a corner as another teacher takes over for a bit, protecting them from danger or fighting along side them, and proudly declaring that Bakugo would never turn villain but all of that means very little emotionally when I can’t see him making connections with these students to make this standoffish confidence understandable. He comes off as one of those super smart teachers that have undecipherable lessons because he has no idea how to connect with his students enough to explain in way they understand. Similarly, he like jots down that he’s taking note of Bakugo and might need to step in before he goes down the wrong path but then does nothing and confidently tells the press Bakugo would never be a villain.

Kakashi was pretty standoffish too, no denying that, and the little episodes when the kids conspire to try to see him without his mask are the kind of outside interactions that would be weird for a modern teacher-student relationship like in MHA, so I get why Aizawa doesn’t really have that with any of the kids. However, Kakashi saw the path Sasuke was going down and spent time with him and confronted him about it (it did nothing to stop him but he tried). He took time to find a teacher for Naruto. He was present and awake for just about every milestone in there education with him. He told them when he was proud of them not other people. He involved himself in some of their high jinks to measure their growth and as such was able to have confidence in them when they went off on their own.

The Villains

And My Hero Academia villains, namely All For One. 

I felt nothing when he showed up. I was all caught up in All Might and his passing of the torch. The guy without eyes didn’t feel threatening, didn’t feel like the big bad he was suppose to be. The League of Villains really didn’t feel like “serious enemies” either cause I actually really enjoyed them when they were on screen for their dynamics with each other. Similar to how I liked the Akatsuki in their more light-hearted scenes when they where super strong idiots banded together by sheer force of will and explosive personalities that refuse to leave a job half finished. With the League I would be just as entertained (probably more so) if they were in a slice of life anime just being terrible people together.

I get the feeling All For One was supposed to be MHA’s Orochimaru. (And I say this despite knowing Orochimaru’s introduction is probably a lot closer to Stain what with the confrontation and all, but his whole “the world is corrupt, I will cut out the wrong and remake it into the pure world it should have always been” aligned more with Pain especially with his quick turnabout saving Izuku.) 

Orochimaru always felt in control even when he was in hiding or on the run, he felt like he had more up his sleeve which is the only thing I got from All For One when he was imprisoned. Both Orochimaru and All For One showed up out of nowhere, very obviously in a class of their own that the teenage main characters had no hope of beating, and a mysterious backstory that clearly put all the adults in the know on edge. But I just don’t see All For One as a villain. Nothing about him screamed “Run for your lives this man will smile as he tears you apart!” like Orochimaru. Nothing about All For One’s secret Mad Scientist lab gave me creepy vibes that left me on the edge of my seat clutching at the nearest pillow the way the Sound Village that practically worshiped Orochimaru and the many base of operations he had did.

Terrible Parents

The Todoroki family. 

...

Look. The world of Naruto has terrible parenting, but they also live in a dictator/military run nation where kids can be a front-line defense or key players in a war zone so it’s hard to measure how to view these people. Cause a father that beats his kid and yells at him to get stronger has genuine reasons to rightfully freak out when children as young as 8 get sent to ninja academy. Families that have a rare genetic trait like the Hyuga or Uchiha have every right to be tough and stern if they feel that will protect their kids when they know putting them out into the world makes them an easier target for enemies that would rip out their eyes. 

I can judge their actions based on their consequences. Like the Uchiha clan planning a revolt forcing their eldest to massacre them to keep the peace and their youngest to live with a crazy amount of trauma. Like the Hyuga clan branding their branch members to protect family eyes, but forcing them into being lesser than the main branch and all the trauma that forced on Neji’s poor head. The stupid level of expectation set on Hinata’s young shoulders that she couldn’t meet in the way her clan wanted that made her self-confidence practically non existent. The Hokage leaving Naruto mostly alone for his entire childhood in a village that openly hated him. The Kazekage trying to have his lonely three-year-old assassinated multiple times once by his beloved uncle - the only person that was kind and loved him - that scarred him so entirely that he carved “love” into his forehead and rampaged around the village and did casual murder intentionally for years before meeting Naruto. 

All that... I can get behind as abuse. I want those sad kids to be happy. They deserved better and I will happily lose myself in a fix-it fic where they get that.

MHA gives me similar scenarios but without the clear-cut consequences that shows when parenting for that world is abuse. 

Endeavor is not a good husband. He is emotionally abusive to his wife to the point she has a mental break and attacks a child. 

However, in a world of heroes, in a world where high school students are trained to protect and serve and that self sacrifice is a noble heroic trait. How do I compare such a society to my own? They put children in harms way with hero internships yet don’t allow them to defend themselves if they don’t have a hero license, that would be like getting a learners permit but not being allowed to practice driving.

All this to say I have a hard time telling when bad parenting falls into abuse when it comes to MHA. Endeavor is not a good parent, he is an abusive husband, but is he an abusive parent? As a hero training up the next generation of heroes can it be argued that he is pretty okay even if his methods are a little harsh? None of his children fear him from what I’ve seen. Shouto happily tells him his plans to never use his fire and all the reasons why without fearing he might be punished for it. The other kids seem to be pretty okay going on with their lives. Toya being the exception but again I don’t know what happened to him and he’s a follower of Stain so did he have a falling out with heroes or did his father push too hard?

Nighteye & Tsunade

Okay so this is where I get super rant-y. I have feelings on Nighteye and none of them good.

Nighteye being the estranged comrade of All Might the underdog’s teacher, Tsunade being the estranged comrade of Jiraiya Naruto’s teacher.

Tsunade has been hurt deeply. She ran because she felt that was the only way to save herself from more pain. Here comes Jiraiya with his new little tag along demanding she come back home, she gets appropriately angry and tries everything she can to get them to leave her alone. Naruto being the special little underdog that he is immediately gets under her skin reminding her of all the loved ones she lost bringing back all of that old pain back, so she gets even. She beats him down and challenges him to an impossible challenge to show him how small he really is and get out of her own responsibilities. But he wins. He wins, and shows Tsunade how closed off she’s become forcing her to face reality head on and face her fears at last. He changes her whole world view through action.

Nighteye has been hurt deeply. He sees the future for every person he touches and as such sees futures in which people he loves get hurt and sometimes die. He believes there is nothing he or anyone can do to change these visions. All Might is his hero, His friend and mentor, his comrade. His friend gets hurt in a way he can never fully recover from and he sees a vision where his friend dies on the battle field. He then tells All Might who refuses to retire and leaves without a backward glance. They don’t speak until years later when Nighteye picks out a successor for One For All, but Toshi chooses Izuku and never meets Nighteye’s pick.

Izuku, needing an internship not Gran Torino, goes to Sir Nighteye All Might’s old side kick. He gets tested, told he’s not worthy of One For All, and has to work under this man as he tries to get Izuku to see how Mirio is more worthy of All Might’s quirk. Facing off against Overhaul when they are at their most desperate Nighteye uses his quirk to see what will happen and sees the worst possible scenario. They lose. Then Izuku flies in sweeps Eri into his arms and fights Overhaul saving the day. Izuku proved, unknowingly, that the future Nighteye sees is not set in stone with his actions and on his death bed Nighteye acknowledges that without acknowledging it.

Nighteye’s treatment toward Izuku makes me uncomfortable. This is a man in a position of power over this student telling him that he is not enough, will never be enough, and that he is a disappointment.

His glorifying of All Might makes me uncomfortable. He was All Might’s partner and yet he practically had a shrine of the man in his office. He made him more than just a man, built him up as The Symbol of Peace and kept him there (as many of Toshi’s friends seem to do except for Nedzu and Naomasa) despite getting close enough trusted enough to learn about One For All. And despite all that “love” and “devotion” he left Toshinori alone to deal with his new normal of a permanently damaged system alone for years then takes out all that frustration and grief out on his friends chosen successor.

Then when all is said and done and he’s dying and he’s confronted by Toshinori and Izuku what happens? Does he apologize? Explain his actions? Get closure in his final moments?

No. Well, Toshinori got some measure of closure. Izuku got a few words that essentially boiled down to “Good job, your better than I thought.” without talking about the newfound hope Izuku’s action gave him that his visions are only possibilities not absolute. All of his attention then goes to his choice for One For All, Mirio. 

Understandably. 

He’s dying and Mirio was always his main priority as a mentor, and you know who Mirio looks like? All Might. He’s blonde, buff, blue-eyed, cheerfully friendly, and with a happy-go-lucky persona about him. Sir Nighteye taught him to smile. Chose him to be the new wielder of One For All and without telling him anything planned to introduce him to Toshinori to make his choice reality. Doesn’t that sound... I don’t know... uncomfortably close to manipulation? Grooming? To taking this child under his wing and molding him to be pretty close to a new version of All Might?

I don’t know. Maybe if Sir Nighteye had lived this uncomfortable impression I have of him would be lessened as he began to internalize the full extent of possibilities for the future that he never thought possible before and acted more hopeful, more willing to take gambles because his visions were no longer a guarantee of what will happen. 

[a-woman-apart]

Astrological Compatibility

After experiencing all that I have this year, I definitely believe that astrology does play a role in compatibility, in the sense that astrology is a pseudoscience based around how time of birth, planetary cycles, and place of birth affect personality. It was developed by human beings at a time when scientific methods of interpreting data were not developed to where they are today. 

If we take a look at how this might play out from a more scientific perspective, think of the “nature vs. nurture” argument. Nature applies to traits that develop either from genetics or during fetal developmental. Nurture applies to external social and developmental factors that contribute to personality after birth. 

There does seem to be a correlation between what season and month people were born in and certain personality traits. It is definitely true that levels of sunlight can have a huge impact on human health and development, but light exposure and seasons can be vastly different across the globe (especially in moving closer and farther away from the equator), which is probably why detailed astrological charts involve looking at birthplace. 

It also provides perspective on why there are differences between the Western and Chinese Zodiacs but there are still some similarities in the way traits are applied. For example, in the Western Zodiac we have “Earth, Air, Fire, and Water” and in the Chinese Zodiac we have “Wood, Fire, Earth, Metal, and Water” because human beings across cultures understand how valuable these elements were to our survival. 

Human beings are pattern-seeking creatures, so it isn’t any surprise that they personified these elements and began correlating them to aspects of human personality. It was just another way of trying to make sense of the world, and I am not surprised that when astrologers examined the natural world and the cosmos (as better astronomical tools became available) they began to make connections between children born in certain seasons and certain personality traits, and I don’t believe the correlation is completely nonexistent. 

The issue we see is that some people tend to think that personality is a fixed thing, and that when someone is born a certain way [nature] their traits are entirely resistant to change [underemphasizing nurture]. 

Even if astrology can offer us some predictors about how a person’s character might develop, we have to remember that personality has nothing to do with whether someone is a “good” or “bad” person. Some people may be more or less outgoing than others, more or less athletic, more or less organized, more or less playful, and more or less “nice” than other people, but that has nothing to do with their morality or ability to be a good romantic partner, friend, sibling, or parent. 

The strength of a relationship is almost entirely dependent on the values of the parties involved.

Whether “star-crossed” or “star-aligned”, the strength of peoples’ relationships is entirely dependent on whether or not they are based on honesty, mutual respect, and compassion. We all know that some people we love have habits that may occasionally-- or frequently-- grate on our nerves, but our choice on whether to continue living with and loving that person is rarely just down to personality. 

We all have that person in our lives with a grinchy, McScrooge disposition, but we love them because they keep their word and you know deep down that they’ve got a good heart even if they don’t always show affection as easily as other people do. 

We also all know someone that is the life of the party, loud, fun, almost obnoxious in their zest for life, but we wouldn’t trust them as far as we could throw them when it comes to any major responsibility. But we still love them anyway. 

And with have to admit to ourselves, that sometimes love is not enough.

Love is never an excuse to allow someone to run roughshod over your boundaries, devalue your ideas, and monopolize your time. Love alone will not save any relationship where either party lacks respect, trust, and compassion.

After ending many relationships this year (including one that I held in very high value) I found out that it isn’t about personality. “Ugh, she’s such a Virgo!” is not a mature answer for why you can’t get along with your best friend, boss, or mother. 

I know that Kati Morton used to say “some relationships are bad recipes” and I don’t really believe that anymore. I don’t really believe that people share mutual blame like that for why things fall apart. It’s fine to admit that someone annoys you or gets on your nerves, but when there is that much bad blood with someone you used to be associated with, I think that boundary violations-- either on your part or theirs-- are to blame. 

I used to lean towards a belief in “star matches” but now I truly believe there are no incompatible signs.   

I know that I tend to lack romantic chemistry with most of my fellow Air nomads, but I always have amazing conversations and a kind of instant connection. I know that from experience, Water signs are amazing listeners. I know that I tend to have a shared drive with so many Earth signs, and that Fire signs have a unique capability to humor and delight. 

Fire signs can also burn your whole life down if you let them. Water signs can be secretive and vindictive. Earth signs can be so stubborn that they won’t admit a single flaw. Air signs can be unreliable and aloof. 

But guess what? So can everyone, because we all have aspects of each element inside of us. Leaning a certain way does not make us more or less bad or good. It just makes us human. 

As I reflect on my experiences this year, I am far more interested in how systems of meaning develop, than the systems themselves. Astrology, just like religion, was developed by humans who desperately wanted to provide an explanation for the mysterious workings of the cosmos, our planet, and the human heart. I think whether or not astrology is “real” is far less important than the history and traditions associated with it. 

Each of the signs in the Western Zodiac has a unique mythological creature and story attached to it. It was only this year that I found out that Capricorn is represented by a half-goat, half-fish creature (essentially a mergoat), and I learned that my sign (Libra) was only introduced into the zodiac later, because there was too much intensity going on between The Virgin (Virgo) and Scorpio (the Scorpion, duh) and Libra was brought in to balance things out. That is the reason why Librans are the only members of the zodiac family to not be represented by a living creature. 

I also found out that this might’ve been part of it because human beings have been liking the number 12 for a good minute, so we had to even out that odd 11 sooner or later. In my numerological deep dive I also found out that Romans were freaked out by the number 17, because it was written “XVII” and that, along with the fact that it was a weird prime number, really upset their sense of symmetry. In general it seems humans are not fond of numbers that cannot be divided by anything other than 1 and itself. So 9 is in, but 13 is out, and its probably more this, rather than the fact that we don’t want a snake sign in the Zodiac, that so many astrologers soundly refuse to recognize Ophiuchus. Obviously we make an exception for 0 (both a number and not a number) and also 1 and 2.  

I “wiki-walked” more and found out that a number of prominent musicians have superstitions regarding numbers, probably because our profession is way more about keeping time and counting than most people realize. 

Also, it’s been fascinating to find out about “the ages” which require incredible math to calculate. We are apparently just beginning the “Age of Aquarius” and a lot of changes that were predicted using past data seem to be “coming to pass.” 

Full disclosure: you can’t use astrology to predict the future of the planet anymore than you can the future of your relationship.

I use astrology to help me understand the past, but I do not trust the validity of horoscopes because it is impossible to know the future. I have developed a saying “History doesn’t repeat itself, but it echoes.” Economists, political analysists, climate scientists, and other experts in their field do not make their predictions based on “hunches” or mysterious esoteric knowledge, they make their predictions based on interpretation of data, and even if these predictions can be incredibly accurate, they are not completely infallible. 

In other words, you aren’t going to experience relationship troubles during “Mercury in retrograde” unless you expect and believe you will, or some other unrelated event causes it. The only difference then is that because you were hypervigilant, you shifted your own behavior in a way that exacerbated the issues, i.e. “a self-fulfilling prophecy.” 

If your marriage or friendship is failing, “astrological differences” likely aren’t the main culprit. Similarly, you should never dismiss your intuition that something is wrong just because your horoscope said, “You will find true love in December” and that is when you found it. That’s called a coincidence, and they’re everywhere. Trust yourself and trust your instincts. Your own personal patterns matters much more than what a stranger or an algorithm has predicted about you. Don’t try to “follow the signs”, test things out and see if things you find in your chart actually line up with what you’ve been experiencing. 

I really do believe in some kind of carnal divinity, a common life-energy that is connecting all living beings to one another. Don’t let your natural light and vitality be dimmed by people who enjoy burying their own light under a bushel. It isn’t a matter of “good” and “evil” in so many cases, but it really is about what kind of life each person wants and/or is willing to tolerate. 

That beings said, welcome to Sagittarius season! I hope you all find your inner flame archer and ride on your metaphorical horse legs right into your destiny. 

[littlestsnicket]

⭐

thanks!! (this got out of hand, but I had fun thinking about these things :D)

I’m going to talk about “Promise not to lie, but that doesn’t necessarily mean I’ll tell the truth” 

First, this title is ridiculously long, and I clearly remember having one of those, fuck, ao3 will not let me post this without a title moments, but I kind of like it; it works. 

Second, I’ve done this a lot less in this fandom (where as like... i think all of my doctor who fic is like this) but the easiest fic for me to write are the ones where I read a fic and think, well that’s not quite right. And I had read a bunch of Violet is a Snicket fic and none of it was quite right. Which is definitely not a slight on the people who wrote it (a lot of it is really good! it just didn’t jive right with my personal understanding of the characters and themes of the series, and well... a lot of it seemed more influenced by netflix than the books), so I went and wrote my own.

Cut because I went through a nearly 2000 word long fic practically paragraph by paragraph.

“What a coincidence, I was about to make myself some tea,” said Violet. Even though this was an entirely plausible statement, Violet was certain it sounded like a bald faced lie, and she was certain by the way Lemony’s eyebrows drew together, that he thought so too, but he took a second mug from the cabinet above the stove, placed it next to his own on the counter, and dropped in a second tea bag. Violet thought she caught him scanning the room for exits, but it might not mean anything—Lemony did that constantly. She sat down at the worn kitchen table.

I like the idea of characters letting each other get away with lies. And I also think it’s important to asoue--there’s a reading of a lot of things that happen with disguises (like when Klaus and Sunny disguise themselves as doctors, and Madame Lulu, and maybe even Olaf disguising himself as Stephano) where I think there is some vfd *thing* where you are trained not to call people out on lies unless you are certain you have more to gain from doing so than you might gain from playing along and seeing what else happens. That’s not terribly related to this fic, but it’s something I was thinking about when I wrote Lemony letting on to Violet that he didn’t really believe she wanted tea, but going along with it anyway (and then Violet doesn’t even drink the tea (but that’s maybe not super clear from the way I wrote it), so Lemony knows at the end... and of course they are both very observant and spend a lot of time watching people both as a matter of personality and circumstance.)

“Thank you for finding us, Mr Snicket, and reuniting our family.”

One of the things I’ve put a lot of thought into is how characters use names/nicknames/titles. It’s something I became very concerned about when I was writing Twin Peaks fic, and I carried it along to this fandom too. And I really liked the idea of Violet using Lemony in her head but still calling him Mr Snicket out loud until they resolve their relationship. 

“I couldn’t say no to Beatrice,” he responded without looking at her.

And then Lemony half denying that he’s done anything special or admirable. I tend not to think of Lemony as particularly self hating, although I don’t know if it comes across that way (especially in “platonic equivalent of hate sex” but that’s from Olaf’s pov and he sees Lemony in a certain way that is not necessarily accurate). This has more to do with Lemony not wanting to make moral judgements about himself, or really allow other people to commit to making moral judgements about himself. Which could certainly be read as self hating, but I think has more to do with pragmatism and a result of his world view which is very accommodating of moral grayness (except when it very much is NOT at all--like no one is ever all good in Lemony’s head, but there are certain people that Lemony allows himself to think of as 100% bad even though he intellectually knows otherwise).

but she was nearly twenty six now and the guardian of a child; she understood now that nothing, but especially trying to do right by a child, was ever as straightforward to an adult as it was to a young person.

The idea that Violet should be a properly grown up adult for this conversation was very much a reaction to reading other fic. It’s also the only thing that makes sense with my head canons about the timeline of when things happen/books are published. And this is also a sort of reference to atwq where Lemony has the line about children inevitably becoming adults that I am not going to look up. 

“I know you were engaged to my mother,” Violet said.

I’m not sold on this. Violet is Bertrand’s child, and this sounds like more of a Beatrice/Klaus thing to say--it’s so very direct. But (a) given how relatively short I keep my fic, I needed to cut to the chase and (b) this was pretty early in my involvement in fandom. While most of the things I think about Lemony are things I’ve been thinking about since I was, idk, twelve or thirteen (Lemony has ALWAYS been my favorite), I had to flesh out Beatrice, Bertrand, Violet, Klaus, and Sunny a lot to be able to write them.

Then the next bit of dialogue--it was important to me to establish that Violet and Klaus (and Sunny too) had been researching Lemony. And there is a lot of information out there about Lemony. (And maybe the Baudelaire parents have been deliberately keeping their children away from information about Lemony, because the Quagmires are familiar with him in tvv--and the particular way they bring it up makes it seem like general knowledge not something that they discovered researching Olaf.) For one thing, I think the Baudelaire’s (especially Klaus) would research Lemony, but it was also important to me to sort of... balance out the amount of knowledge Lemony has about them.

And then of course, there is the thesis of the fic:

“Violet, I have always believed that genetics are a negligible part of paternity. And somewhat selfishly, if I were to think of myself as a father figure—even in a limited capacity, I would have to admit I was a monstrous failure.”

The idea that Lemony hasn’t already worked through his feelings about having a kid (in the strange capacity that he does) is just ridiculous to me. Like... families of choice is one of the KEY THEMES of the book series he wrote. It’s almost a non-issue. And I think when we see Lemony being completely un-self aware, that’s a deliberate rather than passive act on his part. All that performative grief we see in his narration isn’t something that just happens, it’s something he’s actively doing because he cannot deal with the complexity of his actual feelings. Where as this is something he’s worked through and consciously let himself off the hook for, and can concisely and accurately explain to Violet. Because he’s an adult. And even as a child in atwq, he’s pretty self aware about the things he’s not deliberately lying to himself about. 

He placed one mug on the placemat in front of Violet, although the wood of the table top was so scratched and damaged one would never be able to pick out one more ring of water. 

This might be my favorite thing I’ve written in this fandom, and it just... the thing about not using coasters being a sign of evil. I will never get over that. it’s so perfect. Because, when it comes down to it, evil is synonymous with carelessness. And giving up on the idea that small acts of care are worthwhile. And how that is so core to who Lemony is as a person and what being a Volunteer actually means.

blue gray like the sea during a storm—the same blue gray eyes she saw when she looked at Beatrice, the same blue gray eyes that looked back at her from the mirror.

(a) I wanted to connect the Snickets to the sea--it seemed important, and (b) I have a random and unfounded head canon that the Snicket siblings don’t look at all alike besides having the exact same color eyes--so that is the “Snicket” trait that Violet has as well. 

I already talked about the name thing, so I’m going to skip a head a tiny bit. When I wrote this, it was really important that the fic actually be about something other than Violet being genetically a Snicket--it was the only way to show that it’s really a non issue. So Violet and Lemony talk about the Baudelaire parents and casually refer to them as such without any caveats because that’s the truth. 

“Sometimes, it feels like I didn’t know my parents at all. They had so many secrets, so many things they never told us.”

“I am all too familiar with that feeling. I knew your parents quite well; I would like to help if I can.”

And this is Lemony breaking one of the many negative cycles of vfd involvement. And, despite their genetic relation, Lemony is going to interact with Violet primarily as a friend of her parents, and a someone who fundamentally understands what she is going through in loosing ones parents especially in situation of not really knowing what they were thinking. 

I’m going to skip ahead to the sugar bowl bit because the discussion about moral ambiguity and what the Baudelaire parents would have wanted pretty much is what it is. Lemony is able to give Violet closure that I think she really needed. It’s nice. It’s what I want for her. I think it’s something Lemony knows Jacques didn’t have and needed as the eldest sibling. 

Yeah... there is nothing in the sugar bowl. I am sorry. Those are the facts. It’s also something Lemony is not comfortable telling Violet. He wants to prepare her for disappointment, but she doesn’t have the context to really get it yet. Even though Lemony hints at it earlier (”they would be proud to have raised children who were brave and resourceful enough to barter the location of the sugar bowl for their sister’s safety”). That the Baudelaire’s instinctively understood the real value of the sugar bowl. Also, I was already planning what ended up becoming “To share a kitchen” at this point. The original draft was primarily focused on Sunny figuring out what was in the sugar bowl, and that being something that Lemony wasn’t comfortable telling anyone because it’s something that one has to figure out for ones self. But that ended up being kind of tangential to that story in the end. 

Violet was silent and perfectly still, puzzling over all of this not terribly helpful information, as Lemony finished his tea. 

Call back to Lemony saying “he was so still and quiet when he was thinking through a puzzle”. Because Violet is Bertrand’s daughter. 

“Thank you, at least, for not telling me it is too dangerous for me to know.”

“My track record is far from perfect, but I do make a sincere attempt to keep my word.”

This is a direct refute of Widdershins saying that it’s too dangerous for young people to know what is in the sugar bowl. That was very deliberate. Lemony and Widdershins have some shit to work out. I don’t know that they ever get the chance. (I tend to think Widdershins doesn’t know what is in the sugar bowl. And that is a beginning of the rift between them; they seem close in atwq and Lemony seems so casually disdainful of him by the time he is writing tgg.)

And then the last paragraph is just... Lemony is not and never is going to play the role of a father figure for Violet, but they are a FAMILY in the way that matters--they’re comforted by each other’s presence and the small noises they make when going about their normal habits. 

And that is that!

[sage-nebula]

for the HC meme: odd numbers for keith, evens for lotor :D

I’m going to answer for Paradigm Shift because it’s far better than and preferable to canon, and I’m also just going to do all of them for both of them since that’s easier than hopping back and forth, haha.

1.) Their physical weak spots:

Keith: He’s very ticklish behind his ears. It’s not a spot many people know about for obvious reasons, but Lotor discovers it accidentally while kissing, once, and never lets him forget it after that. On a less happy note, Keith has a scar on the back of his neck where Acxa dug out his Revender chip with a knife, and while that healed all right for the most part, it’s still indented, a bit sensitive to the touch, and aches a bit when he’s stressed.

Lotor: Whether it’s something genetic, or whether it’s what years of being dragged around by your hair in your childhood by your various diaks will do to you, the top of Lotor’s scalp is randomly painful to the touch. Often times it’s fine, but then other times the slightest brush against it will make it sting like it’s newly injured. Similarly, “tutoring” sessions with his diak often had him chained him with weights on him, which is what led to him dislocating his shoulders over and over and over again in his childhood. The last few times his shoulders didn’t heal quite right, or maybe this is just what happens when your shoulders get dislocated that many times, but either way he can dislocate his shoulders at will now, though it still hurts like nobody’s business (although he’s also used to the pain to a degree, so …). Other than that, he doesn’t really have any—at least, not any that he’d willingly divulge.

2.) Their emotional/moral weak spots:

Keith: Due to the traumatic circumstances in which he ended up at Revender, Keith can’t remember anything about his early childhood before ending up there, and isn’t even 100% sure that “Keith” is his real name (because the first name he remembered upon waking up there was “Kolgan,” and he went years without hearing his actual name, and had to really think on it when she asked him what it was). He’s a bit sensitive about this aspect of himself and his history (as seen when he snaps at Zethrid for asking if he made his name up), even though he mostly tries to focus on the present and therefore the future. He also, due to being discriminated against and abused for it for all of the life that he can remember, has a few bristly spots regarding his half-galra heritage—namely, that he makes sure everyone knows that he is part-galra instead of letting them put him in one box or the other (e.g. when he snapped at Hunk for calling him “Galra Keith”), and that he’s not going to shy away from, hide, or feel ashamed of this fact. He’s part-galra, and so is their entire team, and so are all the auxiliary teams, and they’re all going to change the universe no matter how many people hate them for that, because people hate them anyway just for being born so they might as well just lead a successful revolution while they’re at it, to hell with anyone who tries to stop them.As far as moral weaknesses go, Keith’s actually pretty ruled by what he feels internally as being Right, which means that he could well show mercy to someone who’d just sold them out so long as that person was a civilian also in bad circumstances. He’s far from afraid to do what he has to so that they survive / their mission is completed, meaning that he has killed Empire soldiers and will do so again (and if another reality-crossing happened absolutely would kick the shit out of every single canon Paladin without flinching if it came down to it, no mercy given), but there’s a reason that Acxa privately deems him “soft” the night they leave with Lotor, and that reason is because Keith is more willing to trust or offer mercy than most. He is, point blank, the second nicest person on their team. (The first nicest is Narti, and even she will fuck you up if it comes down to it, so … don’t mistake kindness for weakness. Not even once.)

Lotor: Oh boy. Well, to start with he has a myriad of trust issues. Lotor faced abuse (often under the guise of “education”) for pretty much his entire childhood up until the point he left with Keith and Acxa when he was thirteen, on top of assassination attempts (none too few of which came in the guise of food, which is why the first and only time Ezor ever tries to pull a food prank on him, it does not go well). Since he never had a trustworthy person in his life until he met Keith and Acxa when he was thirteen, and wasn’t even sure he could trust them right away (and tbf they had made a private pact to ditch him at the first sign of shadiness so he wasn’t exactly wrong), Lotor has an immense amount of difficulty trusting people, and usually doesn’t. On top of which, betrayal is something he takes immensely seriously and, perhaps understandably given who his enemies are, doesn’t forgive. On top of which, while Lotor knows that Haggar = Honerva = His Mother, he likes to pretend that Honerva died and was reincarnated as someone else—that, had his mother lived, she would have loved him. This is something that he works through, albeit with Keith’s very tough love (which in turn amounts to enough of a fight between them that the girls start wondering if they’re going to break up, which leads Zethrid to say, “I had to sit through three friggin’ decaphoebs of that will-they-won’t-they bullshit. They sure as hell better not break up after all that,” and Acxa to reply, “You’re complaining about three? Try six”), but even after he comes to accept that Haggar = his mother just as much as Zarkon = his father, the whole issue of his parents being abusive, genocidal tyrants who quite literally want him dead (or enslaved, or lobotomized and then enslaved, and really, is there much difference?) is still a sensitive topic even though he likes to say it’s not. And as a final note, he’s very sensitive to the idea of losing what he’s worked so hard to gain for himself: a home, a family, and love.

As far as moral weaknesses go, oh boy again. Lotor genuinely wants peace. He genuinely wants to create a universe where all planets rule themselves, where people can live happily, their unique cultures thriving, without the fear of losing their children overnight. But Lotor also doesn’t take betrayal well, as mentioned. If a civilian sells them out, and then that civilian is predictably going to be captured, tortured, or killed by the Empire as well, Lotor’s more than willing to let that happen because the civilian sold them out, whereas Keith’s the one who wants to go back to help the civilian no matter how much of a jackass they were. Lotor’s the one who will gladly throw Throk under the bus to take the fall for something Lotor and the team did, whereas Keith would rather let Throk screw himself over, as Keith is sure he will inevitably do (and Lotor agrees tbh), rather than setting it up. They don’t always agree (the civilian traitor issue is a big one they will never agree on, especially since Keith risks his own life trying to help that civilian out, which Lotor feels is unforgivable x2 on that civilian’s list of crimes now), but in many ways Keith is the one tugging Lotor back when Lotor starts to get too close to that line. Keith brings out the person in Lotor, and grounds him, as AJ once said.

That said, if Zarkon, Haggar, or anyone else ever succeeded in killing Keith? On their own heads be it. 

3.) Scars:

Keith: As you could expect from someone who has spent most of their life fighting (and fighting in a war, at that), Keith has a lot of scars. Notable ones are the one on the back of his neck mentioned earlier, where Acxa dug out his Revender chip with a knife, same as he did for her. As I mentioned before, that one aches a bit when he’s stressed and is a bit indented. He also has a little scar on his bottom lip from where an opponent in the Revender arena bit him when they were fighting; their fang went all the way through his lip and left a scar there. There are plenty of others, too, but those are the most notable that I can think of right now.

Lotor: Like Keith, Lotor also has a lot of scars, albeit pretty much all of his are in places easily covered. He has scars around his wrists and ankles from these bracelets / anklets his diak made him wear during “tutoring” sessions when he was young, which would deliver harsh shocks whenever he got an answer wrong, tried to argue something he was taught, et cetera. Originally the shocks would just leave weals, but after enough layering eventually the skin there just scarred. Similarly, the stunt he pulled in the Revender arena the day he met Keith was enough of a transgression to earn him a punishment in lashes from his diak, oversaw by Zarkon and Haggar to make sure it got done, and so he has scars all down his back from that, too.

4.) Best places to kiss on their body: 

Keith: Lotor likes to kiss Keith behind his ears, given how ticklish Keith is there, but Keith’s preferred spots are on the corners of his mouth or eyes, or on the palm of his hand. The palm kiss always makes him melt a little.

Lotor: Lotor likes it when Keith kisses him down along his neck and across his shoulders. He’s also very partial to Keith placing kisses between his shoulderblades when they’re lying in bed at night.

5.) Guilty pleasures:

Keith: For the most part, the idea of feeling guilty for liking something is foreign to Keith. There’s so much to be miserable about in the universe, given that the Empire rules it, so why should they make fun of the little joy they have? The closest he gets is when Kolivan gives him the yupper plush he had as a child, and the nostalgic scent (that he doesn’t even remember the reasoning behind) makes him hug it without thinking. That’s embarrassing, and even more so when Keith realizes how comforting the smell and feel of that plush really is. Other than that, though, no guilty pleasures.

Lotor: Keith is a lightweight, and he’s also very giggly when drunk, and so sometimes Lotor likes to persuade Keith into drinking just so he can see Keith get very giggly and silly because it’s endlessly amusing to Lotor. It’s a guilty pleasure because he knows he shouldn’t, but … he just wants to see Keith say “cash cache” and then fall into uncontrollable giggles because in that one, intoxicated moment, it’s the funniest thing Keith has ever heard in his life.

6.) Their vices (physical or emotional):

Keith: Whether it’s with one of the pod ships they have, or a hoverbike, or even the Black Lion, Keith loves flying as fast and as recklessly as he can. He’ll take ships out on test runs through asteroid fields, dodging and weaving around them, because the rush of adrenaline is intoxicating. Even when he crashes, provided he’s not unconscious or dead afterward, he’ll end up laughing because of the sheer rush of it all. This counts as a vice not only because of how dangerous it is, but also because pretty much everyone hates that Keith does it because of how dangerous it is to his health and safety. (One time Keith wrecked a hoverbike he’d been testing so badly that he had to fly a pod ship back with a broken leg, several splintered ribs, and a dislocated shoulder, and Lotor just about had apoplexy.) 

Lotor: This will sound silly at first, but—gossip. Not harmless, middle school gossip, but Lotor likes scoping out information on others (his enemies, namely) that he can pocket and use for later, usually in ice cold revenge dishes. He’s not only always listening no matter the situation he’s in, but he also utilizes information networks in his spare time in order to get whatever intel he can for later use. Even the most trivial thing, like how one of Zarkon’s commanders hates another, high-ranking commander, could come in handy someday, and so Lotor grabs whatever seemingly petty gossip he can. (Also, sometimes it’s just funny. He’ll admit to schadenfreude where other people’s embarrassing secrets are concerned.)

7.) Their tickle spots:

Keith: Behind his ears, as mentioned.

Lotor: None, actually! He’s not ticklish at all.

8.) Bad memories/experiences:

Sadly, given the lives they’ve led, it’d be easier to list the good memories / experiences.

9.) Humiliating memories:

Keith: Once everyone finds out from Kolivan when Keith’s actual, exact birthday is, Ezor rounded up everyone (meaning their team, plus the auxiliary teams) to sing a happy birthday song to Keith on the day of. He had to endure a roomful of people singing to him at once, all eyes on him. It was awful, and he made sure it never happened again.

Lotor: Soon after they met Ezor and she joined the team, she decided to pull a prank on Lotor by putting something super spicy in his morning cereal. Because Lotor had many experiences in years prior to that with people poisoning his food for a variety of reasons (“lessons” from his diak, people actually trying to kill him, et cetera), the taste of a flavor he was not expecting and that shouldn’t have been there triggered him pretty badly. He wasn’t at all at fault for this (and believe me, both Keith and Acxa chewed Ezor out over it) and has no real reason to be embarrassed, but to this day he still looks at that loss of control as a pretty embarrassing memory.

10.) Fears/phobias:

Keith: Keith doesn’t have any phobias, and on the day to day he doesn’t consciously fear anything, because unless something is happening right in that moment, he doesn’t see a reason to fear it. In other words, if they have some downtime and everyone’s safe, he doesn’t consciously think about how he’s afraid of his friends (his family) being captured by the Empire and tortured to death. But if they all were captured, then yeah, he’d be afraid of them being tortured to death, but even that would be kind of muted because he’d be more focused on rescuing them and getting them back. Fear isn’t something that rules Keith, or something he dwells on. He doesn’t see much value in sitting around scared; he’d rather do something to eliminate the threat.

Lotor: The idea of facing his father in one-on-one combat is something that scares him. Being anywhere that’s open and exposed without a weapon close at hand makes him feel anxious. The idea of there possibly being a leak in security in his ranks is enough to make him triple check every precaution he’s taken to make sure there isn’t. In contrast to Keith, who is a very much “we’ll deal with that problem when we come to it and otherwise not think of it” type of person, Lotor is fully aware of the things that unnerve him and takes active precautions to make damn sure it never “comes to that.” 

11.) Bad or petty habits:

Keith: Keith bites his nails, and scratches at itchy scabs, and when someone is bullshitting he never lets it go. The fight Keith and Lotor have about Lotor accepting that Haggar is his mother that I mentioned earlier? The reason that was so prolonged is because Keith brought it up at every single opportunity. Lotor would walk into a room and Keith, without looking up from the tablet he was reading, would ask, “So, accepted that that witch is your mom yet?” He finds ways to reroute conversations right back to the point he refuses to let go, pushing and pushing and pushing until the person admits the truth. Again, Keith did that to Lotor out of very tough love (because if Lotor didn’t accept it in a safe place surrounded by people he loved, odds are he’d have to accept it when in a bad situation with Haggar herself, and that would be ten times worse), but it nonetheless can seem pretty petty to everyone who’s not him.

Lotor: It’s not uncommon for him to fall asleep in full armor, which in turn becomes pretty grody from sleep sweat. He also doesn’t always remember to take his dishes back out to the kitchen and so it’s not too uncommon to walk into his room and see a collection of used mugs and glasses over at his personal desk. (Smh, that’s how you get space ants, Lotor.)

12.) Grudges and vendettas:

Keith: Keith doesn’t hold grudges. Legitimately, he just doesn’t. He’s very much a, “we’ll deal with it in the moment and then be done with it” kind of person. If he has a problem with you, you know it because he’s told you. And you either settle it and he moves on, or you refuse to change your ways and he accepts that and still moves on, just while liking you less as a person. Of course they’ve made enemies of the Empire, but that’s not really a grudge or a vendetta. That’s, “they’re killing innocent people and also want to kill me so we’ll take them out of power first” type of deal. Sort of a whole different situation.

Lotor: On the other hand, Lotor remembers everything that has ever happened to him or the people he cares about and he never lets it go. He has a mental list of people who have wronged him or his loved ones and how, and should the opportunity ever arise to pay back one of those on the list, he does so and with interest. Throk was a racist, backstabbing traitor? Well, send him to the Ulippa outpost to rot with the ice worms (at least until the opportunity arises to frame him for further treason in the Empire, at which point do that so Haggar can torture him instead). Ezor’s mother abandoned her as a child and then only took interest in her again once she realized that her daughter had grown up to be a Paladin of Voltron? Well, once Ezor has realized her mother for the opportunistic vulture that she is, arrange it so that the woman is sent off to a different corner of the universe where it highly unlikely she’ll ever be able to attempt to leech off the daughter she cast out ever again (and where although she is surviving, she is not thriving), and so on. Lotor never forgets anything and there is no statute of limitations on these grudges, so it’s really in everyone’s best interests to never cross him or those he cares about. Sooner or later, it won’t end well for those who do.

13.) What gets them flustered:

Keith: Compliments. He is awkward as all hell when being complimented, particularly if he’s complimented by Lotor given the feelings he has for him. Remarks about how he is invaluable short-circuit his brain, but even smaller compliments like how he is an ace pilot are enough to make him start blushing and deflecting. He just can’t take a simple compliment from the one he loves without getting all embarrassed. He’s a mess.  

Lotor: There’s not really a concrete way to get Lotor flustered, because catching him off-guard is no easy feat. That said, blunt, honest admissions of how much one (particularly Keith) cares for him are definitely a way to do it. Keith does not play games, nor does he beat around the bush, and this way of his of just stating exactly how he feels gets under Lotor’s guard and skin. Examples can be seen here and here. 

14.) Ingrained habits/forces of habit:

I feel like I just answered this one in 11, haha. The only thing I’d add is the routine checking of security systems and the like that they both do, but otherwise I already talked about their habits.

15.) What it takes to make them cry:

Keith: At this point, the death of someone he loves. Pain, even extreme, generally doesn’t make him cry. The thought of his own death doesn’t. Unfortunately, the Empire being what it is, he’s seen so many innocent people killed by the Empire that that doesn’t drive him to tears, either. But if he lost someone he loved? Yeah, he’d cry then. That would do it.

Lotor: Pretty much the same, although I think his tears would be more from fury than grief, and followed by a scorching wave of vengeance in their name. He wouldn’t have tears to spare for grief, though, because on some level he’d reason that he should have expected this to happen. The moment he finds any happiness for himself, Zarkon and Haggar rip it away. Isn’t that how it goes? (Doesn’t mean he won’t make them pay for it with their lives, but still.)

16.) Dark secrets/’skeletons in the closet’:

Keith: I think the closest Keith has is that promise he made with Acxa the night they agreed to leave with Lotor, that they’d take him down and bolt at the first sign of shadiness. This is especially because it was his proposal; Acxa was reluctant to trust and go with him, but Keith pointed out that if it came down to it, it was two vs. one and they could take him. That was what got her to agree. The thing is, as the years go on Keith forgets about this promise entirely, so it’s sort of like shroedinger’s skeleton, in a way. Is it really in his closet if he’s forgotten it’s there?

Lotor: Mmm, I don’t know if this really counts, but when he was younger and still under the “tutelage” of his various diaks, it was common knowledge to those in the circle (including Lotor himself) that he was expected to shape up and become “good enough” not only because he was Zarkon’s biological son and therefore the crown prince, but also because he was intended to be betrothed to Sendak when he was of-age, given that Sendak’s bloodline was exceedingly pure, he was of a high-ranking noble class, he was pretty much the apple of Zarkon’s eye, and so on. Of course, the fact that Lotor was half-altean was not something that thrilled Sendak, but again, Lotor was the crown prince. The idea that Zarkon and Haggar had was that once Lotor and Sendak wed, Sendak would act more as emperor than his true role of emperor consort, making Lotor little more than a figurehead. Naturally, once Lotor fled Revender with Keith and Acxa in tow those plans were pretty much nixed (and Lotor was never into the idea anyway), but it’s still something he remembers that he never shared with the others. (And note that no swords were exchanged, so they were never officially betrothed. The swords would have been exchanged when Lotor came of age, but since he ran away before that happened, it was never an official engagement. Just a plan he did not agree to but was set anyway because none of the others involved cared about his consent.)

17.) Regrets:

Keith: He regrets any life he took outside of those that were Empire soldiers actively trying to kill him. Accidental kills in the Revender arena, any civilians caught in the crossfire . . . Keith doesn’t dwell on it, because dwelling won’t do any good, but he regrets each and every one.

Lotor: Lotor regrets telling his diak about a servant he befriended in his childhood due to the execution that resulted, although that’s yet another thing on the long list of things he intends to make his parents (and said diak) pay for down the line.

18.) Things they’ll never admit:

Keith: Keith is pretty honest about most things, so he doesn’t have a lot of secrets. That said, after he finds out about his true heritage (that his mother was one of the agents of Marmora, that he lived there until he was kidnapped at age three), there are nights when he wonders---and in a way, kind of longs for---what his life might have been like had he grown up there all along, but then he immediately feels guilty because it means he might never have met Lotor, Acxa, or the others. So he’ll never admit to feeling that way. Also, he and Lotor have made out in the Black Lion, multiple times, but he’ll never admit that to anyone, either.

Lotor: That he’s afraid of facing his father in a one-on-one duel. That he’s afraid of discovering through multiple-reality research that perhaps his mother would have always loathed him, even if she’d never “turned into” Haggar. That when he learned of Keith’s true heritage with the Blade of Marmora, for a split second he wished something would blow up the primary base so that there’d be no risk of Keith leaving him for them.

19.) People they’ve hurt or indirectly killed, and how it affected them:

Keith: When he was nine he was transferred into the weapons’ testing division at Revender, which essentially consists of two primary components: There’s taking a weapon through obstacle courses of cannons and poison gases and whatnot to see how effective everything is, and there’s taking weapons into a combat arena to test how effective they are there. Keith always tried to avoid killing his opponents---usually he’d knock them out---but the first time he accidentally killed someone, it was because they were holding him down, choking him, and he flailed out with a dagger in his hand and put it right through their throat. Their blood ended up all over him, and he was returned to his cell like that, to sit silently through the night as Acxa told him repeatedly that he did what he had to do and it wasn’t his fault. He was ten. He didn’t sleep that night.

Lotor: When he was very little he befriended a servant. It was slow, at first; this servant knew the risks of so much as looking Lotor in the eye, much less talking to him, but Lotor hadn’t picked up on any of his father’s classism, and so he persistently tried to talk to him until he opened up. He was kind to him; she told Lotor stories about his life back home, slipped him candies and such when he could. After one particularly harsh lecture from his diak, Lotor exploded that his servant friend (he used his name, obviously, I just don’t have one for him yet) never treated him this way. The diak reported this to Zarkon and Haggar, and they had the servant executed. Lotor was not notified until after the fact. He blames himself for it to this day.

20.) What-ifs/Alternate Timelines:

I mean, the show’s reality is an alternate reality for these two here in Paradigm Shift. There could be others, too. There’s that one Keith speculates about, where he did grow up among the Blade and never went to Revender, never met Acxa or Lotor that way. There’s one where the war never happened, where Lotor was raised properly as a prince, where perhaps the Blade of Marmora never formed and maybe Keith was never born at all since Krolia would have no reason to go to Earth, then. There’s an infinite number of possibilities and realities. So many exist. But as Lotor says, the only one that matters to them is this one right here---the one they’re living, where they’re together. 

21.) Turning points in their life:

Keith: Well, being kidnapped and taken to Revender for one, albeit he doesn’t really remember that. He just woke up there one day with no memory of where he came from, how he got there, or what was going on. Meeting Acxa was another, because she reminded him that he was a person outside of the identification the Revender soldiers and scientists gave him, and she also gave him companionship in there, just as he gave to her. Then there was meeting Lotor, since he gave them a method to escape, and hope of revolution, too.

Lotor: The death of the aforementioned servant, having everyone in the Revender arena reject his ideals and facing punishment for what he did there, claiming the Castle of Lions and realizing that his revolution truly was possible for the first time, and so on.

22.) People who’ve influenced them greatly:

I’m a firm believer in the idea that everyone we meet and regularly interact with influences us in some way. Therefore, I’d say that both Keith and Lotor have influenced each other greatly, but on top of that, they’ve each been influenced greatly by Acxa, Ezor, Zethrid, and Narti as well. (And later on down the line, Kolivan, too.) They all influence, learn from, and grow with each other. It’s part of what makes them and their relationships with each other so strong.

[jilliancares]

It’s Not Spying if You Don’t Call it Spying

Summary: Turns out Everyone is spying on Lance and Keith’s blossoming relationship.

Word count: 5k

read on ao3

Pidge was a curious person. It was something that extended to all areas of her life, whether that meant she was taking apart a toaster at the ripe old age of six to figure out how it worked or spying on her friends in her free time. It wasn’t like it was an active decision, it was just something that happened to her. She’d see someone down the hall, maybe walking kind of like wherever they were going was a secret, and Pidge would accidentally on purpose find herself following. Nothing serious.

Anyway, it wasn’t like she would ever tell anyone what she found. The secrets she gleaned from her less-than-honorable spying sessions were for her alone—and in extreme cases could maybe be used later for blackmail. But mainly it was just to satisfy her own curiosity. Like now, for example.

It was commonplace for her to be unable to sleep. There was all the stress from defending the universe and trying to find her family with any scraps of information she could salvage, not to mention the fact that without the actual sun her circadian rhythm was a bit out of wack—meaning her body liked to think that now was never the right time for bed, even when she’d been up for 36 hours straight. Which was why she often found herself holing up in random corners of the castleship, maying secretly taking apart and putting back together a random Altean invention, or simply sitting in a dimly lit area to think.

But, being up so often as she was, she normally knew the going-ons that happened at night. She knew when Lance crept out of his bed occasionally, his face glistening with tell-tail tear tracks as he made his way to Hunk’s room. Pidge guessed that this was the doing of nightmares or possibly just the thoughts that were likely to attack at night, the ones that berated your mind with thoughts of things you missed and were scared of and might never see again. She knew when Hunk got up in the middle of the night to bake something strange. She knew when Shiro walked the halls, still asleep, enacting some dream or flashback that she couldn’t get to him through—could only lead him back to his room. She knew when Keith trained until the early hours of the morning, when Allura snuck down to the room Alfor’s AI used to inhabit, when Coran stared out the control room into the endless space beyond, looking for all the world like he was wide awake.

And because she knew all these things, had observed them enough during her waking nights to know what was normal, she knew what was decidedly not normal. Such as Keith and Lance walking into the kitchen together, their voices too quiet for her to hear. The moments that the two were quiet and kind were rare, far and few in between, and Pidge felt like she’d found something magical to have witnessed it like this. Part of her thought that they should be disagreeing more than usual in the middle of the night, the lack of sleep making them crankier than usual. But a bigger part of her knew that, regardless of what time it actually was, there was something about the late, late hours of the night that opened the heart and loosened the tongue. She’d just never have expected it to happen to these two idiots.

It wasn’t hard for her to ignore her moral code (she hardly had one anyway) and follow them down the dark halls once they left the kitchen. She’d only known they were in there anyway because of the update she’d installed into her handheld device herself—it let her know where people were in the castle at all times, which was helpful for whenever she needed to find someone. Everyone else seemed to just think she had incredible intuition, which she didn’t mind letting them believe.

Anyway, she observed them from around the corner as they sat down on opposite sides of the hall. Lance’s bedroom was on one side, Keith’s on the other, but neither boy entered their room. Lance leaned against the wall, his legs spread out all akimbo and his hands gesturing as he talked like always, though maybe a little more subdued with exhaustion. Keith sat with his legs crossed, which was just so Keith it made Pidge want to snort in amusement—she held it back, not wanting to ruin her spying purposes.

She only stayed to watch them for a couple of minutes. They were both clearly drifting, both dead on their feet—or their asses, really—and she assumed they’d be going to bed any minute now. Besides, it wasn’t like she could actually hear what they were saying, which was annoying but also gave her ideas for an invention she could maybe make…

So when Pidge went back to the lab, jotting down random ideas for an eavesdropping device (which, come on, could totally come in handy with the Galra, so like. Perfect excuse right there) it was in full confidence that Lance and Keith would be back in their beds within the hour. It was only when she was finally flagging, ready to stumble off to bed herself, when she thought to check her handheld, to see if they were still around.

They were.

Curiosity was strong. Even exhausted, even with her eyelids seeming to be weighing her down, she managed to go all the way back to their neighboring bedrooms to see what they could possibly still be talking about.

And this time she really couldn’t hold back a snort, because these idiots weren’t even talking! They were both asleep, both passed out on the floor, Lance with his head leaned back against the wall and Keith with his chin to his chest. Shaking her head, Pidge swore to have her eavesdropping invention ready the next time they decided to have a midnight chat like this one.

—

It wasn’t Hunk’s fault he was nosy. It was probably in his genetics, woven into his DNA. Some small part of him that left him bug-eyed and mouth watering when he came across something that he could put a minimum amount of effort into to gain more information on the subject. For example, reading Pidge’s diary when she left it sitting in plain sight (like her bedside table), or pestering someone bad at keeping secrets (Lance) for the gossip they had on others. And so it was only natural, woven into his very genetic makeup, for Hunk to investigate when he began to realize there was something up between Keith and Lance.

And for once, he didn’t mean up as in another fight, another dumb dispute that they had gotten into which inevitably had people picking sides and the whole thing turning into Lance-and-Hunk-and-Pidge against Keith-and-Shiro-and-Allura-and-maybe-Coran. It took longer for Hunk to realize something was up this time around, because there was nothing for him to notice. There wasn’t any bickering, no yelling across the room or taunting or teasing or challenging. Instead they were both quiet, lately, and as Hunk began observing them, he noticed that sometimes they’d catch each other’s eyes and smile.

And that’s when Hunk knew something was definitely up. Keith rarely smiled, and even more rarely at Lance. If Hunk didn’t know Lance better, he would wonder if he’d done something to poison Keith and mess with his mind or something.

Eventually, Hunk figured that since Lance was so bad at keeping secrets, he might be able to just ask him what was up. It’d certainly be easier than trying to sneak around the castleship and figure it out for himself, especially when he was already pretty bad at the sneaking part. He tended to be pretty clumsy and almost always knocked something over with a loud crash when he was trying to be silent.

“Lance,” Hunk said one night after dinner. Dinner was Lance’s favorite part of the day—he knew because Lance had told him himself. It reminds me of home, he’d admitted. You know, my family was so big, it was always so loud and crazy and great, but my mom always managed to get all of us together for dinner.

Almost since the beginning Hunk had felt like their team was a family, and he was pretty sure Lance thought so too. It was one of the reasons he put so much effort into their dinners. Instead of letting everyone drift off and eat on their own like they were wont to do for their other meals of the day, he managed to gather them all for dinner, every night. He was pretty sure they all liked it, really. Conversation always flowed, accompanied with laughter and anecdotes and smiles and food. No matter how hectic the day, dinner was always good. It was because of this that Hunk figured it’d be extra safe to confront Lance after dinner, his nerves already at ease.

“What’s up my dude?” Lance said, spinning around to snap and point at Hunk with a set of finger guns. “Is this about dinner tonight? Because I know I told you I could sing praise about it for a quintant but I actually am about to go to bed.”

“No, no, it’s not that,” Hunk said, squashing down his pride at Lance’s words. He cooked dinner for them often, though sometimes Coran insisted on making something, which they usually did their best to force down. Sometimes they outright refused, stopping by on a near planet for an alien equivalent of fast food. “It’s just—is something up between you and Keith?”

“What?” Lance’s eyes had gone wide, his face pale. Hunk wondered if something really was wrong. Maybe they weren’t speaking because their arguing was already commonplace; maybe the natural angry progression of that wasn’t to argue more but to argue less.

“It’s just… you guys have kind of mellowed out recently, haven’t you? Like, you’re not arguing a whole lot anymore.”

“Oh! Oh. Yeah, I guess. I mean… yeah. You’re totally right.”

“You didn’t notice?” Hunk asked incredulously, and Lance puffed out his cheeks with air before releasing a big breath.

“Nah. Guess not.”

Hunk stared at Lance. Lance stared back.

“That all?” Lance asked.

“I guess,” Hunk said slowly. “You know you can talk to me about anything, right?”

“Yeah, totally!” Lance said, completely over-eager. He punched Hunk on the shoulder harder than usual. “Night dude!”

Hunk stared after him. He blinked once. Twice.

Something weird was definitely up.

—

Shiro probably wouldn’t have noticed it if it hadn’t been for Pidge and Hunk. It was just that they both seemed more intense than usual. Lance was still loud and Keith was still angry at just about anything he decided to feel angry about, but Pidge seemed extra concentrated and Hunk kept making weird humming noises under his breath which was actually pretty unsettling.

He decided to ask Keith what was up with Pidge and Hunk.

It wasn’t hard to get Keith alone, he was always stalking off to sulk or look broody in some corner or other, but for some reason Shiro was having trouble. Normally it was easy to find him, checking his usual haunts like the training room and his bedroom and even the kitchen—but he was nowhere to be found.

Shiro realized that maybe it was a little strange to go to Pidge to find out where Keith was so he could ask him about Pidge, but he didn’t really have any other ideas. Plus, Pidge had some kind of crazy intuition—she could almost always figure out where everybody else was.

“Hey Pidge,” Shiro greeted as he stepped into the lab. It was the room Pidge spent most of her time in. The desks were strewn with half-abandoned projects and scrap pieces but if anyone dared to touch any of it Pidge would probably murder them. No one knew exactly what would happen if they did touch it because none of them were crazy enough to try.

“Hey Shiro!” Pidge answered, spinning around on her chair to look at him. “What’s up?”

Looking at her, Shiro was hit—as he almost always was—with just how young she was. How young they all were, really. They’d all been dragged into this war, so random, so brutal, and yet no one ever complained. They just embraced it. Pidge carried half the team sometimes with her genius ideas. Lance made light of any and every situation, just so they wouldn’t despair over whatever trouble they were actually in. Keith ran blindly into everything, as if he hadn’t a care whether he lived or died. Hunk always kept a solid head on his shoulders, always thought things through and refused to let anyone give up hope. And still they were all so young, all so undeserving of the sheer terror of a war resting on their shoulders—Shiro would take the weight of it all, if he could.

“I was just wondering,” Shiro finally said after clearing his throat, forcing himself out of his own thoughts, “if you knew where Keith was?”

To his surprise, a coy grin found its way onto Pidge’s face. It pulled her lips up almost scarily. “You’ve noticed too?”

“Noticed what?” Shiro managed, frowning in confusion. That quickly, the look on Pidge’s face was gone.

“Oh. Whatever,” she said hastily, shaking her head.

There was a pause.

“So?” Shiro prompted. “Any idea where he might be?”

Pidge closed her eyes, pursing her lips. “Lance’s room,” she finally said with a smile. Shiro frowned again, sure she was wrong, but… Well, whenever was she?

And so he made his way back through the halls, back towards Keith’s room, and instead of knocking on the familiar door, he turned to Lance’s. He’d never been in Lance’s room before, never really had any need to. Still, if Pidge thought Keith was in here… Maybe they were talking about a recent mission together or something. They had had to spy on some Galra generals not too long ago. Shiro knew sometimes he felt like discussing their missions further, even after they’d already gone over it all by the time they got back to the castleship.

Shiro knocked on Lance’s door. It was automatic, but only to the room’s owner—for everyone else it waited for permission.

“Um? Come in?” Lance’s voice called unsurely. When the doors slid open Shiro found Lance laying on his bed, one knee bent and the other leg stretched out before him. He rose his eyebrows when he saw Shiro.

“Oh! Shiro—I was expecting, um. I mean. What are you doing here? Are we training or something?”

“No, sorry,” Shiro muttered, suddenly feeling like he was intruding. “Pidge told me Keith might be in here, I don’t know.”

“Crazy how she does that,” Lance muttered, shaking his head. Shiro raised an eyebrow. “Well he was here a few minutes ago. Just, you know. Talking. He’s probably back in his own room now?”

“Okay. Thanks,” Shiro managed. “Sorry.”

“Not a problem!” Lance called after him, the automatic doors sliding shut as he left. Shiro came to a stop before Keith’s door, raising his fist to knock. But he didn’t. Because… Well, because maybe there wasn’t something up with Pidge in the first place—or Hunk.

He furrowed his eyebrows, staring down at his feet as he thought. No, they weren’t really acting that weird after all, were they? Sometimes they’d get obsessed with something and kind of ignore everything else until they’d gotten to the bottom of it, but usually not at the same time. Usually not at the same thing. But maybe this time, maybe this thing…

Well, just maybe it was another pair that was being odd. Shiro tapped his metal fingers against his thumb, from his index to his pinky and back again. It was a strange habit he’d picked up and hadn’t been able to drop for some reason, but it was comforting nonetheless. One, two, three four. One, two, three, four.

With a small shrug Shiro turned and went back down the hall, figuring he didn’t need to bother Keith. One, two, three, four, one, two, three, four. Whatever it was, the two of them could figure it out themselves.

—

Allura frowned at her bowl of breakfast goo. It wasn’t that there was anything wrong necessarily, it was just that, well… something was different. And she was sick of it.

Or, more specifically, she was sick of being left out of it. She was aware that she was constantly being excluded from the rest of the team’s shenanigans. She figured it had something to do with being the Altean princess and the one in charge. Maybe everyone else thought it was wrong to invite her to watch movies with them or to play cards, but it wasn’t. And she was bored out of her mind!

And what was a tragically bored princess supposed to do other than to secretly catch up on the affairs of everyone in her castle? Sure, that might sound like spying, but it certainly wasn’t. It was just… secretly catching up on everyone’s affairs. Privately. Without any of them knowing.

And she found out plenty of useful things this way! Surely it couldn’t be bad when she was so entertained by it?

For one thing, she realized that Hunk was a good singer. He only ever did it when he thought he was alone but hearing his voice made her wish that he did it all the time. It was deep and beautiful and made her feel like dancing again, something she hadn’t done since a few years before the war truly began. And she learned that Pidge could sleep literally anywhere—she curled up at odd hours of the day in completely random places, almost like a cat. Allura had come across her laying on top of the kitchen cabinets once, and just… how had she even gotten up there?

She’d done enough spying on Coran in her life for nothing truly interesting in that department to be revealed, though that didn’t stop her from doing so anyway. Still, nothing exciting was gleaned in her efforts besides the fact that he apparently liked to talk to himself which, really, maybe shouldn’t have been such a surprise.

What was a surprise was that after missions Shiro walked and walked and walked around the ship, following pathways completely randomly. Sometimes he would reach up and rub at his shoulder, where metal melded with skin, and Allura wondered if it was something that bothered him often, if it was painful.

She learned that Lance, apparently, spoke Spanish to himself when he was alone. She’d just pressed her ear against his door, merely curious as she hadn’t seen him all day anyway, when she’d heard— “Oh mierda! I’m… Fuck, I— Dios mierda. Dios.”

She also learned that Keith could be pretty tricky to track down. Her first place to check was always the training room. If he wasn’t there then she was sure she wasn’t going to be able to find him. She almost thought that he was doing it on purpose, stubbornly refusing to let himself be found. It only made her all the more determined to find him, to figure out what he was up to.

—

Coran paused, speechless, as he stood in the middle of the hall. Against the wall, quite a ways from him, were two paladins. Of course, on earth what they were doing might mean something different, but… Well, what else could kissing mean, really?

Lance had Keith pressed against the wall, his hands cupping his face. Keith’s hands were resting on Lance’s hips, pulling him closer, and Coran decided that it just wasn’t his business.

He turned around and left. It wasn’t like anyone else had to know.

—

Lance was in love with Keith.

Or… he was pretty sure he was, anyway. If he wasn’t then he was well on his way to getting there.

It’d only been a few weeks since they’d started getting so much closer. Sleepless nights spent in each other’s company, talking about anything and everything they could think of. Lance told Keith about his family, about his parents and his older siblings, about his nieces and nephews. He told him about visiting his grandparents in Cuba and about his favorite beach. He told him about genuinely loving the Garrison, and about how he was afraid he would amount to nothing, never truly pass, never be able to fly like he wanted to.

And Keith told him everything, too. He told him about being in the foster care system, about going from family to family, about getting his hopes up again and again only for them to be crushed brutally underfoot every time. He told him about the loneliness of it all, his inability to make friends because of it. He told him about how he aged out of the system, how he’d never even had a real family until now, until Voltron. He talked all about how the only constant in his life, really, had been the internet, where he’d browsed endless sites and learned everything he could and always got way too deep into conspiracy theories.

They talked so much, so often, that sometimes they just talked themselves to sleep. Sometimes Lance would wake up with the worst pain in his neck, only to find Keith curled into a ball, his cheek smushed against the metal floor, right across from him. Lance figured it started happening then—the flutter in his stomach, the breathless, nervous sensation in his chest. Lance had tried to shake it off; a crush on someone he spent every single day with could in no way be good for him, but it was unshakeable.

And Keith, it turned out, didn’t really have boundaries. He’d spent so long without being close to anyone, so long being on his own and in solitude, it would really make sense for him to be most comfortable that way, to think hugging and cuddling was weird. Except, no, nope, not at all. He was like a cat starved for touch—as soon as it started happening he was addicted to it.

He would stand utterly still, this odd look on his face, just waiting for Lance to hug him like he had once before. Once Lance deciphered that look, he realized that Keith gave it to him every night before bed (on the nights they actually managed to stand and stumble into their own rooms, that is). And it only progressed from there! Lance would grab his hand to drag him somewhere and show him something, and when they arrived Keith simply wouldn’t let go. And one night Lance offered for them to hang out in his room for a while, to talk on his bed, and Keith readily accepted.

It really wasn’t that surprising that they fell asleep together. And even less surprising that they woke up tangled together.

After that it just became habit. Sleeping together was better than sleeping alone—it was warmer, comfier, a hundred times less lonely.

The first time Lance kissed Keith, he seemed surprise. The second time, not at all.

Lance was just glad he kept letting him do it.

—

“When do you think we should tell them?” Keith asked. They were laying on the couch in one of the castle’s many living rooms together. Lance was under him. Keith had made good use of the little room on the couch by simply laying on top of Lance, who didn’t seem to mind at all. He was playing with his fingers, drawing them out and tracing them from palm to tip. His fingers were long, skinny and tan where Keith’s were shorter, paler.

“Dunno,” Lance said. “Whenever, really. I’m kind of surprised they haven’t noticed.”

“Me too,” Keith murmured. Normally he felt like everyone was pretty on top of things, noticing every minor detail out of place. One time at dinner Keith decided to have a second plate and Hunk had asked him if he was feeling okay. “Maybe they’ve gotten dumber.”

It didn’t matter—Keith didn’t feel in any rush to tell them. He kind of liked having Lance all to himself, anyway. Normally he was loud and obnoxious and made horrible puns that Keith didn’t understand half the time, and when they were alone together he was still all these things. But he was also sweet. He was also soft. He was also smooth, when he wanted to be, when he really tried—the things he said could make Keith blush.

Sometimes when they were in bed together, when things were fast and hot and sharp, when they were panting and gasping in tandem, sometimes Lance even spoke in Spanish. Keith was pretty sure that Lance had caught on that he liked it when he did that—it was dumb, but he couldn’t help thinking it was hot. Sometimes Lance would lean down and whisper something in his ear, something that he couldn’t even comprehend but that slid so easily from his tongue that it had Keith arching into him all the same.

“Unless they all already know,” Lance hummed thoughtfully. “And just aren’t telling us.”

“I don’t think any of them can keep a secret,” Keith pointed out, and Lance hummed in reply.

—

Pidge snorted, pulling the headphone out of her ear. It was like a hearing aid almost, letting her hear things at a certain distance, and she’d been using them to listen in on Lance and Keith. Honestly, did they really believe none of them could keep a secret? If anyone that was Lance.

She huffed and wriggled a bit, trying to get comfier. It was a tight squeeze, but… Pidge fit. Maybe it was a bit extreme to start crawling through the air vents in order to spy on her friends but she was bored, okay? Drastic times, and all that.

And anyway, this was obviously the best thing she could’ve done. Because she was witnessing this, Keith laying on Lance, the two of them talking about being together. And they were right! Nobody knew! Well, other than Pidge, of course.

Or so she thought. It was about two seconds later that her eyes zeroed in on Hunk. Across the room. He was peering from behind another couch, just his eyes poking over the edge of the sofa. Pidge narrowed her eyes at him—how dare he spy on them!? Or, erm… so blatantly, anyway?

A sudden clunking somewhere behind Pidge had her twisting her head over her shoulder, breath coming short in her chest. What was it? Had someone snuck into the castle? Were they in the vents?

“Ow,” Allura muttered as she hit her head on the ceiling as she came around the corner. Her eyes widened when she spotted Pidge.

“Pidge,” she whispered. “What are you doing here?”

“I could ask you the same thing.”

“…I asked first.”

“I don’t care.”

Allura let out a frustrated groan. “I’m just… looking around. Doing some reconnaissance. You know.”

“You’re spying on Keith and Lance, aren’t you?”

Allura just nodded and Pidge managed to scoot over. If they smushed together, there was just enough room for the two of them to look out through the vent. And so Allura shimmied up next to her, humming in surprise as she saw the position Keith and Lance were in.

“I should’ve realized!” she whispered. “Can’t believe I didn’t guess…”

At that very moment, Shiro came walking past the living room. He paused in the doorway, blinking as he spotted Keith and Lance.

“Hey guys,” he said.

“Aagh!” Keith said in surprise, tumbling to the ground. Lance hauled him back onto the couch. “Er—hey Shiro. We’re dating.” (Allura let out another gasp; across the room, Hunk’s eyes widened at the outright admittance.)

“That’s nice,” Shiro said pleasantly. “Good for you two. Have you seen… well, anyone?”

“No,” Lance said with a shrug. “Have you checked the kitchen?”

“Yep.”

“Control room?”

“Yep.”

“Er—training room?”

“Yep.”

“That’s odd,” Lance said. Pidge could see him frowning from here.

Right then, Coran came running up. He took one look at Keith and Lance, sitting very close together on the couch, then turned to Shiro.

“It’s not what it looks like!” he proclaimed.

“What?” said Shiro.

“They’re just—sitting!”

“We’re dating, Coran,” Lance piped up.

“Oh. You’re admitting it then?”

“You knew?” Keith interjected. Coran shrugged.

“I’m sure I’m the only one.”

“Not true!” Hunk suddenly exclaimed, standing up from behind the couch and pointing at Coran. “I knew! I most definitely knew!”

Keith screamed again, more from surprise than anything else. It was pretty startling to realize you were being spied on, Pidge was sure.

“Well I saw them kiss,” Coran said, seeming offended.

“I noticed that they stopped bickering!” Hunk argued. “I knew about it first!”

Pidge gasped, offended. There was no way Hunk knew before her.

She punched out the screen to the air vent, wriggling out a bit and dangling from the ceiling.

“Liar!” she shouted. “I knew first! I saw them talking in the hallways! And sleeping in the same bed!”

“Well I heard them having sex!” Allura jumped in, which made the room quiet down except for Keith’s indignant splutters—his and Lance’s faces matching colors of crimson.

“How do you—” Lance finally broke the silence.

“You speak Spanish when you’re—”

“AAHHH!” Keith interrupted.

The room exploded into more screaming, everyone sure that it had been them who knew that the two had been dating the longest.

—

Keith turned to Lance. “I guess we don’t have to break it to them then, huh?” he muttered. His face still felt hot.

Lance just looked at him miserably. “I don’t think I can ever have sex again.”

[moonbelt]

»the infinite possibility of us

↳   somewhat soulmate au | college au | lowkey lost-friends to lovers au

pairing » kim taehyung | reader

genre » soft angst + fluff + sexual themes + warlock!taehyung

word count » 14.787

author’s note » this was born out of a need to read something magical bc i am positively obssesed with soulmate aus

Let's get the first misconception out of the way: you are not a witch. Or at least you're not the most conventional one or one with any type of materializing and brewing powers and the whatnot. You do have some magical prowess, that cannot be disputed, but you cannot, in fact, fly on brooms, make actual use of frogs' feet or use a cauldron to prepare anything but regular plain store-bought soup. You can, however, see true love —soulmates if you will.

One touch with any body and you can envision can see decades down the line, maybe not even that far ahead, to when they'll meet The One they are destined for. The person that the stars and the universe have decided to attach to them for all eternity. It's a funny thing, love is. It's not supposed to be tangible. It is meant to be felt, breathed in, experienced and lived in, but you wouldn't really know that considering your ill-fated fate of having never fallen in love. Or rather your inability to.

It's like your organ is defective. You have the ability to see true love, the greatest of magic this world has to offer (at least this is what you tell yourself) and yet you can never seem to see any love like that for yourself. And sure, you believe that love comes in different forms. You love your family dog, Dex, you love your sisters, you love (the term is loose here) the supernatural. You love trees and the smell of rain. But the kind of love that cannonades through your entire body? Nah. You've seen it when you touch people and perceive the one they're going to be with. You understand it in their eyes and in their smiles in the few whatever seconds you get in the vision. But personally, you can't really explain it without cliché descriptions.

And look, you're not complaining. It's ah-mazing watching the people you match end up together and ride into the sunset, guaranteed to a lifetime of happiness and forever and lazy mornings together. It would be infamously weird, not to even mention horrendous, if a self-proclaimed love doctor doesn't believe in love at all. Truly, your heart infinitely swells just at the memory. And you love what you do. You see it as an obligation to use your gifted talent to help others even though there's no physical way you can help yourself.

It's a side effect of being able to see soulmates, you've since discovered. No matter how hard you run your palms across your arms, you see nothing. Blank space, endless oblivion, no love in sight. More often times than not, it leaves you in a bout of loneliness and the ever-present feeling that you'd end up alone. Imagine that. A matchmaker alone living with twenty-four dogs. Not that there's anything wrong with dogs but. . . It's the principle of the situation.

Think about the good things! You force yourself to remember your well-thought mantra instead of falling deep into the pit of never-ending why's. Once you fall into it, it takes a strong level of self-awareness to bring you back out.

Anyways, you're not a witch. No matter how long you hang around the Witchcraft practicing folk, you're always reminded about your shorthanded-ness. Your sister, Ionia, takes the head of the circle during this coven meeting (as she does in every gathering, she isthe leader so it's only natural.) Your family's coven (sans you) is made up of thirteen Wiccans, all who sit in the circle in the middle of the renovated "conference" room.

Really, it's just the living room with all the sofas pushed out to the edges, far enough not to disrupt any witchy stuff happening in the center but close enough that you and your other sister, Sara, can push them back into place once the meeting is over.

Today the topic is on determining if it is necessary, in the words of coven member Park Jimin, for magical folk to keep living under the radar of other species. Other species meaning regular non-magical humans. It's the most debated subject you've heard to date. Why must witches and other mystic beings hide from mere humans? The word mere used with insurmountable contempt and disdain.

You already know the answer Ionia is going to give in return. In fact, you could write a whole book on Ionia's stance on the matter. Although not all supernatural creatures are as righteous as your sister, Ionia truly has her moral compass hanging on her version of the good spectrum. And just like every other night, you are not allowed to partake in the discussion happening in place. You have a lot you want to say but alas, you cannot speak out of turn. That would be un-magical of you. If anyone gets that drift.

Being a seer of love gives you no brownie points in your family's line of outrageously strong witches. As it so happens, the witchy bloodline skipped you. It's taken years for you to come to with the fact that your parents weren't exactly expecting someone so... powerless. Their own kid no less. Just to be clear, there's absolutely nothing wrong with you predicting (with a hundred percent accuracy of course) another person's love. It isa good type of magic. Maybe not the kind of magic written in the grimoires and spell books littering your house, but it was a great magic nonetheless. You swear on it.

It doesn't matter what anyone says, you know your magic is enough. However, it is not enough to land you a say in Beyond Dark coven's politics. In fact, you're not even among the coven. You're more of an honorary member. Like you've made emphasis on before: you're not a witch, warlock, whatever. You're not it. You simply get a pass at being here since it's held in your living room and has been led by your family for centuries. And your sisters can't exactly kick you out once a week, you'll riot.

Another win for genetics! But you guess it could be worse. Imagine not being born with a speck of spectacular at all. Oh, the horror. You are glad the witches and warlocks in Beyond Dark don't go around wearing that absurd black pointed hat that a few other Wiccan folk have yet to dissolve from their attires. It makes it way easier to blend in. You're also happy that the meetings are held at your house. It gives you a good reason to be more than necessarily invested in witchy affairs.

"For the last time, Jimin," Ionia sighs out. It gets tiring, repeating the same explanation ever so often. "Our abilities are like every other thing; money, lust, power. They can be abused if used in the wrong situations and besides, we're not supposed to go around rubbing in our talents in humans faces. However great they may have been, look at what happened to our ancestors."

Ooh, she's pulling out the witch trial card. Ionia only ever does that when she's frustrated. Most times she likes to pretend that most of the founding witches and warlocks weren't murdered by conniving humans. It's like she's playing a game of erase-the-memory with herself because everyone else remembers it. The laws of witchcraft would never let anyone try to forget it. But Ionia does her damn best and you'll admit, she's pretty good at it too.

Jimin huffs back into the floor, his butt sinking deeper into the cushion pillow. He shouldn't feel too bad. Being a new member of the coven, he has no idea how things work. He'll come to learn that Beyond Dark, although unconventional in its ways, has certain traditions that have never been breached. Like the fact that the head of the coven has always hailed from your family —hence Ionia's leadership. And most times, what she says goes.

The meeting ends soon after that, Ionia promising to hold the next one the same time next week Thursday as usual. You're too busy silently pushing the couches back into place, listening in on the stray ending conversations of other people when there's a knock on the front door. Sara looks up at you as she drops a wooden table back into position near the TV. "You expecting anybody?"

Shaking your head, you release your grip from the back of a brown sofa. "No. You?"

"Nope." Sara turns to Ionia who's deep in a gesticulation match with warlock Namjoon, the somewhat vice leader of Beyond Dark. "Hello? Miss Leader?"

Sara gets a special kick out of annoying your eldest sister but you can't say it's not funny. Sara and Ionia are amazing witches and even amazingly more older sisters. There had been a time when you'd hoped your magic would grow exponentially enough so that you could be on the same league as them but, that never worked out. You would never be able to win in a physical fight with Ionia, so you stick to petty things like getting on each other's nerves.

Ionia rolls her eyes. Being the first born, she likes to have this air of nonchalance and reduce most fights to child play. Which it is. It's just fun child play and sometimes you wish Ionia would be able to see that. But all the magic in the world can't remove the stick up her ass, so there's that.

You go back to arranging the living room with Sara. The person at the door is obviously not for you. You're not allowed to have anyone over on Thursday nights. Coven meetings are serious business, even if half the time all they do is talk about failed experimentations with frog's skin or plain supernatural gossip.

You avoid coming in contact with anyone as you put back grimoires into shelves unless it's absolutely necessary. No reason to go on a trip of finding out their soulmate unless they explicitly ask you to. Especially when they're already dating someone. Fuck, that's the worst. They get positively angry when you tell them that what you see in your vision isn't the one they are currently with. You can handle being called a lot of words but a fraud isn't one of them. If there's anything in your life you can bank on, it's your abilities and right now your inner gut senses are going haywire telling you to raise your head up from the uninteresting journal entry about the dangers of Horned Wasps on a full moon.

Although your power isn't the greatest, other things considered, you don't go around hiding it. Any supernatural can take one look at you and know you have magic abilities just not enough. Word has gotten around the rumor mill that you are a "teller of love," their words not yours.

On a good day, you could get twelve requests to reaffirm someone's fears of never being alone. On a bad day, ten of those people leave you with more insults about you being more of a stupid whack than a love teller. Understandably so, you didjust tell them that their current partner was a no-go. Is there ever going to be a way to let down people easy? If there is, you don't know it.

It's when you place back the leather-bound book and scan around the room for anything amiss that you see him. Your eyes almost slide past him but, you stutter and then freeze in holy-hot-guy headlights. The second your eyes connect, hot stinging sensations zip line through your body, making your breath catch in your throat. The experience is so unnerving and not to mention unexpected, that all you can seem to do is only stand there, staring at him with your hand unsteadily raising to your chest where your heart is struggling to break free.

A current crackles between the two of you, effectively raising the hairs along your spine to prickly attention. Strangely, the guy has his mouth agape, staring back at you, as if he too feels this bizarre kick. Which must be inherently wrong; no one, regardless of gender, has ever gaped at you. And you've never felt this concrete emotion in your chest before with anyone. So yeah, maybe it's just that you happen to be staring at him and he just also happens to be staring at you too. The only problem is, he isn't turning away.

Even more, stranger is it feels as if you've known him for years. Which is ridiculous considering you can swear you'd remember if you'd met him before. Even though he does look vaguely familiar. A guy this beautiful can't be easily forgotten. And guys this gorgeous can't be easily hallucinated either.

You don't know why you feel this pull, but you don't like it. Nor do you like the way something inside you gives a little —almost illogical —delighted squeal, as if you've been mentally scanning for men and have just found the perfect one. Which again is ridiculous because it doesn't matter who it is. If you have to touch your crush and find out that they have someone at the end of the line that's not you, well let's just say, that's the ultimate buzzkill.

Moreover, he's not the type that you usually used to date. Not that you really have a type. You dated safe guys, guys who you knew weren't really invested in you. Which was fine. You weren't inherently devoted to them either.

But this particular guy might not be your normal type, but his eyes are so magnificently captivating that it makes you stall for a moment too long. You have no idea what color they are, you can't see from this far back, but they are a commanding pair beneath arched, dark brows. And even from your position, his long lashes are visible. Fates, those eyes are picturesque. And formidably daunting. You feel his stare slither through your body like a slow, hot stroke. And shit, he's staring at you like he knows you and like you should know him too. And now you're wondering why you're having a hard time deciphering how.

He's talking with Ionia and Namjoon and you know, you can feel it somewhere in your bones, that he is a warlock. A powerful one at that. The aura bathing around him is far from little and it is far from unused. For some reason, he missed this meeting and if the sly-apologetic smile gracing his face is anything to go by, he wants forgiveness.

You scoff, Ionia has a wand-shaped button wedged up her ass. There's no way she'll let him off the hook. Even if Namjoon persuades her too. That's just the way your sister is. So, imagine your shock when you see her smile back at him, give him a pat on the back, and then turn to the rest of the dwindled congregation and say:

"Everyone, this is our new coven member; Kim Taehyung."

From somewhere in your receded memory, you remember that Beyond Dark had been looking for a new witch to replace Ms. Orland who passed away a few weeks ago. Odd numbers are widely recognized as bad omen within the witchy community. Thirteen wiccans just isn't how the coven rolls. And here is the new materialized fourteenth member.

You'd been expecting an oldie to replace Ms. Orland. What's the saying? Old for old? What you hadn't been expecting is this. He's tall – not ridiculously so but you can tell that he has some giant blood mixing in his bloodstream. He has to at least be six foot four or more. He looks comfortably at ease with his skin and massive, broad shoulders yet perfectly proportioned muscles. And by Fate, he is gorgeous. Glinting brown eyes, chiseled features, sun-kissed skin. A dark green, backward baseball cap covers most of his light brown hair. It's on the longer side, you notice, with ends sticking out the back and tickling his collar.

As if he feels the strong emotion rising between the two of you, his cheek twitches. He takes one step forward into the center of the living room and flashes everyone in attendance a half-lopsided grin that can rival any type of paralyzing spell. And even though he's looking at everyone else, the goosebumps on your arms can't seem to calm the heck down.

"Hi," he says and you swear three witches die at his voice.

By Gods, his voice is a smooth luscious rumble that sends hot shivers zapping through you. You shoot your gaze downwards and stare at your converses as if they are the most interesting thing in the world. It doesn't matter how you feel. Whatever this thing is, is something concocted by your mind to play tricks on you. You've long since come to terms with the fact that having a relationship is out the cards. Oh, but did you try though. You'd tried the serial dating thing but it was kinda hard to kiss someone when the only thoughts swirling in your head were those of someone else. Ugh, someone drag you away from this pit before you get buried.

Like magnets, the few witches around gravitate towards him. Sara nudges your shoulder to get back to work and you grumble all the way as you do it. But even then, you can't shake the uncanny feeling in your chest that you've seen him before. Possibly a face in the crowd that you don't remember? No, worse. What if you've seen his face among the countless people you've come in contact with in your visions? A horrible impression sinks into your chest.

Not that its much effort, but you do your best to not cross eyes with him again. None of that jittery, knees buckling nonsense. You know better than to get invested. In fact, you should already be prepared to live life with your twenty-four dogs in solitude. You can hear his voice though, the charming timbre vibrating throughout the room. And you can't really focus on anything else.

"Do you remember him?" Sara breaks you out of your self-induced trance.

"Huh?"

She uses a thumb to point at Taehyung's general direction. "Him."

You shake your head and squint your eyes, confused. "Am I supposed to?"

"He can't be that forgettable." Sara runs her words in circles. "Doesn't his name ring any bells?"

"Ter, spit it out already."

Holding out her arms in surrender, your sister flops down on the soft cushion of the sofa. A deliriously mischievous smile lighting her lips. "He was our neighbor like ages ago. You know back when we lived in Mom & Dad's house? Tae and his older brother lived next to us. Oh, shit, you really don't remember? You had the biggest crush on him when you were, like, ten."

That's not possible. That's not absolutely fucking possible. You have stellar memory. While some people can forget what they had for breakfast a few hours ago, you could remember things in clear perfection. Well, not much of faces because you've seen far too many in one lifetime, but everything else? Heck yeah. You could remember the shape of the pizza you had on your eleventh birthday. A rectangular one. See? Flawless memory.

"No, I didn't."

"Yes, you did. You were ten. I was seventeen. I'm sure I have better recall of that, hmm?"

You roll your eyes. Sara is most definitely pulling your legs. There's no way you would have forgotten this crushof yours. And you use the term crush loosely. "Delusional much?"

She shrugs, black hair cascading down her shoulders at the action. "Anyways, Namjoon is Taehyung's brother's friend. Taehyung needs a new coven considering his last one got disbanded by internal disputes and well, voilà."

Here you are indeed. Your lips twist up into something snarky. "So, what? You want me to run to him and rekindle whatever misplaced crush I had?"

"Misplaced?"

"Obviously. I'm not destined to be with someone. He is. Whatever crush," you crook your pointer and middle fingers to emphasize on the word. "I had was stupid. It's not possible and I'm not playing a losing game."

Sara cocks her head to the side. "You still believe that?"

It's not like you have a choice. You refuse to give your heart to someone and then have it handed back to you bruised, battered and crushed. You believe in love, clearly. However, you don't believe in pushing fate. And if your fate is a life without the romantic type of love then... it sucks. But, you will learn to adapt. You have to learn to. Jealousy is an ugly thing and you don't want it feeding into your blood. Now if only your heart could get the memo a little quicker.

Searching for any kind of way to get out of this conversation where all your limits are being tested, you pull at the braided blue bracelet on your wrist. "You're in charge of dinner today. Are we having anything good?"

"Shit," Sara sits up straighter, and you know she completely forgot that today was her day to feed your meager trio of a family.

"Yeah, shit."

"I could order pizza?"

"Like what we had yesterday? And the day before that?" You tap your lower lip for emphasis and dramatics. "Oh! And the one prior to that too."

She reaches up and smacks your shoulder a little bit too hard and you wince but don't allow the smile slip off your face. "Shut up. Do you have something better in mind?"

For a bunch of spectacular witches, your sisters are hopelessly lost in the arts of cooking. You guess years of brewing potions could do that to you. Even with their age, burned toast is the best they can do. But you weren't exactly affluent in the cooking side of things either so you can't judge. Correction: you can't judge a lot.

"Yup," you grab your phone from your back pocket and check the time. Eight fifty-four. Nice. "Vee's is still open."

Sara's eyes start to mist with tears. "I could cry."

Honestly, you see where she's coming from. Food at Vee's could make anyone weepy by sheer amazedness alone. Vee's is a local restaurant that has a beautiful cuisine to match its equally unique name, but the main keeper though? It's open bright and early until sometime around one a.m., which is a blessing. Gods know how long these coven meetings run along for. You're not surprised with the amount of gossip they could talk about but you're so glad it's over earlier than usual.

"I'll get us take out." You offer solely based on the fact that you don't want to be in the same vicinity as the new warlock that's making his rounds talking to people. With this new information reeling in your brain, you don't want to be around him anymore. You're on a mission to deny, deny, and deny this connection to the grave.

"I love you," your sister says as she places an arm on your shoulder. "You're my favorite."

You laugh at that, checking your pockets for your wallet. "I'm always your favorite."

"As long as you don't tell Ionia."

"Don't tell me what?"

Sara makes a choking sound in the back of her throat that sends you into another fit of laughter. Ionia has materialized right behind her, arms across her chest and her face tilted to the side like she knows something the two of you don't. You do a mock salute to the two of them, excusing yourself from the sibling rivalry that's about to happen. "Bye!"

None of them stop you as Sara flies deep into trying to explain to your eldest sister that she meant absolutely nothingwrong with her statement. Ionia won't buy it, but whatever. You feel a pair of eyes digging deep into the side of your head but you will yourself to not look up and instead, sneak out from the front door. Well, not really sneak as much as you slink around bodies unnoticed except by this one person.

The night air is cool against your arms and you're thankful that it's almost winter. There's only so much humidity you can take. You nibble on your bottom lip as you begin the way to Vees.

Taehyung. Taehyung. Taehyung. Why on earth can't you remember him? Yeah, okay let's assume you believe your sister's revelation. You should be able to remember things that happened when you were ten. Heck, you recall a whole lot of things that happened when you were eleven. Your parents had fought in The Great Wiccan War and had sacrificed their lives, along with thousands of others, for the safety of the witches and warlocks at home. They fought against the hatred of other supernatural beings paired with influential humans that wanted the same magic, the same power. They wanted everything without actually being of witchcraft practicing folk. Ironic and disgusting at the same time.

You may not be a witch but the memory stings just as much. But now that you try to dig deeper into your valve of memories, nothing else pops up. Nada. Zilch. Empty. And the more you try, the more you start to feel a headache popping up. In fact, now that you're actually indulging, you realize that all your memories from then are fuzzy. The only reason you know your parents fought in the war is because your sisters told you... Now that you try to evoke a picture of your parents from memory, you find out that you can't. And the admission leaves you more disturbed than before.

The lights of Vee's bring you out of your reverie and you sigh in relief. Vee's has an old retro feeling that sinks into your bones and makes you love it the more you stand in it. And oh gods, the food. Good food to put you out of your sour mood and also, you hope, help you stop thinking about Kim Taehyung for more than godly normal. You take your usual place in a pale blue booth situated near the window and wait for someone to come over.

The place isn't fully packed but it isn't exactly empty either. People in their lonesome inhabiting too-big booths just like yourself. Ah, you wish Sara had come along with you, but then she'd talk your ears off... but then again that seems a lot better than being left alone in your thoughts. Your thoughts aren't being amicable tonight.

A girl with a high ponytail asks you if you want anything and after explaining to her with utmost care the way you take your coffee, she zips away with your order. You use the heels of your palms to rub your eyes. You are so not going to bed tonight. Your sisters can wait a few hours before dinner. If they get really hungry, they can order pizza. A win-win for everyone.

It's as you wait for your cup of caffeine that you hear the little ding of the door sound and against every feeling in the pit of your stomach, you look up.

Ah, the Fates are most certainly after you tonight.

You're not a firm believer in coincidences, but this has to be somewhat by chance because, in the past years, you've never come across him in this diner before. In fact, you've come across him twice today more than you've ever encountered him in ten years. His eyes scan the diner and light when he sees the person working behind the counter.

"Jungkook!" the grin on his face is wide.

Jungkook, you guess, looks up from his notepad and shoots him an equally wide smile. Gods, so much smiling is going around you feel your cheeks burning from the impacts already. "I thought you couldn't make it tonight?"

"Was in the area and thought I'll bless you with my beautiful face."

"Oh, that'sthe reason. Guess the triple-decker pancakes aren't a viable option?"

Taehyung barks out a laugh before responding with something witty yet apologetic at the same time. While you take a closer look at Jungkook and see it. The difference in magical abilities. He definitely isn't a warlock or anything of that caliber, but he looks about thisclose to being on the elf spectrum. Elves aren't tiny, you know this, and he undoubtedly isn't smallish-ly built. But the pointiness of his ears gives it away.

Like an intervention, your coffee finally makes an appearance. You thank the girl and manage to pull a smile as you take it. One sip. That's all you need to get through this bizarre night. You sink deeper into the booth's seat, willing yourself to banish with the air. Alas, that doesn't happen. Alas, Taehyung eyes meet yours in a colossal of moments.

You don't know why but you decide to glare, arching one brow in the same way Ionia does when she's peeved with something you've done. Having been on the receiving end of this look, you know firsthand about its effectiveness... On most people. This guy though? The barely veiled amusement in his eyes expands instead of contracting. In retaliation, he raises one of his own eyebrows. Taunting you.

This time he whispers something to Jungkook before making his way to you. You curl your fingers into a fist in a dire attempt to stop your body from squirming. You're not fazed by him. Not at all. Nope –

"__." His voice is low and steady and oh' how it blitzes your eardrums.

And then through the murkiness of your memories, it hits you square in the chest: this inaudibly amused, slightly introspective look, you've seen it before. In fact, you've seen it countless times. In your dreams maybe but in real life too. It's like watching a movie replay in your mind. Days spent behind a house in the backyard. Bandanas tied around your foreheads. Fuck, you've seen him before. Regardless of what Sara said, you believe her prior. You doknow him. Not in the same way though. The guy playing in the film in your mind is too young, too skinny, too short, too familiar. The guy in front of you now is a hundred ways different.

The glare slips off your face. Replaced by something indescribable because you're not sure what it even is. Luckily, he speaks again.

"Is this seat taken?"

Even if it was, you think you would have a hard time telling him no. You nod your head, not trusting your voice just yet. Smiling, he takes the seat opposite you, his frame eating up space. You pluck a menu from the side of the table and pretend to mull over your order. You know the whole menu like the palm of your hand, but that does nothing to deter you from staring at anything but his face.

Without looking up, you take a hasty sip of your coffee. "So, Taehyung," you air his name out for the first time. "It's been a while."

When he doesn't answer immediately, you pull your gaze up. His expression is guarded and you have the sudden urge to dive under the table and never be seen again. So much for trying to come off as cool, calm and collected. The three C's which you are not.

He blinks, dragging his focus from your lips to your eyes. "Tae."

"What?"

"My name," he clarifies. "I go by Tae."

"Ah," you fiddle with the corner of a laminated menu. "So, I'm not allowed to call you Taehyung? Is that only for friends or something?" It's a joke but you're not positive your delivery is executed properly.

He shakes his head but doesn't jest or twitch, just keeps his attention steady on your face. "Didn't mean it that way. If you want to call me Taehyung, then go for it." Before you can ask him why he had insisted on Tae in the first place, he cocks his head to the side and continues on. "I was under the impression that you'd forgotten me."

Holy-crapping-shit. "And what made you think that?"

"Sara."

"Bitch," you mutter on your breath. Of course, Sara would be the one to cast your dirty laundry out to dry. She probably told him all smug-like too. Ugh, you want to drink a sleepiness potion right about now. Just pass out for the rest of the day. But potions like that are ridiculously expensive... demand and supply and all that.

Taehyung laughs now. "Lovely vocabulary."

You shrug, for some reason feeling easier in your skin than before. "I take full credit."

"As you should. It's a hard thing having siblings."

Finally, an ally. "Tell me about it. If I had more powers, I'll challenge them to a duel or something."

At your statement, he furrows his eyebrows. "You're not a witch?"

"You can't tell? You can't see the insurmountable difference between your level and mine?" You don't intend to come off as insulted as you do, but this topic gets you on edge faster than any other.

Taehyung shakes his head, not sure how to approach this. "I mean I know you have magic but I didn't go around weighting it against anything.

Oh, how you wish the rest of the supernatural community were as open as him. You deny the butterflies cocooning to life inside your belly. You rake your teeth across your bottom lip, contemplating if you should just tell him. Then your ears burn as you realize you just brought his undivided attention to your mouth. Like some goddess of sexuality has possessed your body, your tongue snakes out and wets your lips. His gaze snaps to your mouth, and his eyes narrow.

Damn, you feel it again. That measured, heated sizzle fighting to burst out from your lungs. It's like the air around the two of you is charged. So impossibly electrocuted. This guy makes you wet with just one look and it's ridiculously unbecoming of you but you don't know to fight the feeling. Or rather, you're not sure you want to.

You flatten your hands against the table and force your body to cool. Is it just you, or is he a little bit closer? Close enough that you can see his eyes are a sharp shade of brown, lighter around his cornea before expanding out with a starburst pattern.

"I'm a matchmaker."

"A match... maker?"

"No, no. Matchmaker. Together. You've never heard of a matchmaker before?"

Tae leans back into the cushioning of the booth, his tongue poking the side of his cheek for a moment. "The type that can see true love?"

Pride blossoms in your chest and spreads to your cheeks. That's the only conceivable reason as to why you're now grinning like an idiot. "The one and only."

"Ooh," he says in admiration, clapping his hands together. "That's amazing."

"I aim to please." Crossing one leg over the other, you take a mock bow. You're enjoying yourself, which is a shock because you never thought you'd be this comfortable with someone other than family. You don't want to get ahead of yourself but a tingly buzz lights across your skin and your brain short-circuits before it can get the message.

"How does it work though? Can you look into someone's eyes and just tell?" Taehyung runs his fingertips across his jaw as he nods his head. "Like in That's So Raven except what you see is visualizations of their future lover?"

For a second you get caught up in the movement, in the strong line of his jaw and his long, nimble fingers. You can't remember ever thinking about guys' fingers in terms of sexiness before, but Taehyung —Tae — definitely has sexy fingers.

You shake your head, fighting the heat creeping up your body. In your life, you've never met someone that actually wants to know about what you can do. It's always been a that's-a-cool-story-but-not-really reaction. This is highly unexpected and you can't believe how easily drawn you are to this guy. He's virtually a stranger.

"That'd be cool. One touch," your fingers that are splayed on the tabletop are dangerously close to his that are interlocked together. If you shift just a breath away... "And I'll know."

Shit. You really don't know what the hell you're doing. Because it sounds a great deal like flirting to you. Instinct tells you that flirting with Kim Taehyung isn't something to do flippantly. And there's the fact that you know he's not the one for you. You know this, you know this, so why is your chest suddenly pounding a smidgen too loud?

You can tell that he wants you to find out about his soulmate but you don't want to. If you do then this, whatever this is, won't happen anymore. You'd be forced to crawl back into your shell and hope for something else – someone else. Somewhere deep in your bones, you know this feeling isn't going to come back. You didn't feel like this with any of the boys you dated in high school. You didn't feel it with Yoongi, your previous boyfriend that you parted with because you found his soulmate in the flesh. Nothing good is going to come out of testing the fire that is Kim Taehyung and yet, you can't stop yourself from diving in deeper.

"Anywhere?" He inquires, his voice as whispery as yours.

"Anywhere what?"

He licks his lips, leaning forward on the table with his elbow. "Do you have to touch a specific part of the body?"

You blink continuously. Is he... still flirting? You can't tell anymore. "I don't know. I haven't tried before. Usually, it's the arms."

His lips quirk up. "You should find out just how extensive your abilities are."

"Is this some spazzy way to get me to touch you?"

A hint of a dare flashes in his eyes. "There are a few other people in here. You could go ask them. But I figure since we know each other..."

"Barely."

"You'd rather ask a stranger?"

"You're assuming I really care that much." He's also assuming that he isn't as much as a stranger as everyone else in this diner.

His grin is blindingly white. "I know you're curious." His gaze flickers to your hands. "You're fiddling them with the want to know. You used to do that a lot when we were younger."

Huh, you didn't remember that. You honestly thought it was a habit you acquired sometime in high school. You smooth your fingers to prove a point and exhale roughly. He's watching you. Patient. Calculating. Tempting.

Your fingers clasp around your coffee mug and you down it all in one go. Fuck, where's the waitress? You haven't ordered anything substantial and you have a feeling in your gut that any moment from now it's going to growl loudly. Instead, you growl at him. You swear something else is possessing your body this night. You're never like...this. You are a sophisticated guru of love. That's what you are. So why, oh why, are you staring at him like you'd actually go through with what he's planning?

Your gaze flicks down from his eyes to his lips. His perfectly carved lips. You definitely want to know the feeling of his lips on yours. Wild and impossibly stupid. Taehyung must notice your diverted attention but instead of calling you out, he simply arcs an eyebrow at you. "C'mon then."

By Fates, Gods and every godlike being in the universe, this cheeky bastard is totally playing you. And here you are tumbling deep into his trap. Because you cannot look away from his face now. More specifically his lips, which are parted marginally. An innocent incitement? No. It's dare. A fucking dare.

Shit. You've never been exceptionally good at ignoring dares. No matter how shorthanded you are. You just keep pushing and pushing. A fatal flaw, you realize now.

Perhaps there truly is something unthinkably wrong with you because you slide out of your side of the booth and move over to his side before you can change your mind. Suddenly, your nose is inflamed with the scent of pinewood and mint and something else you can't pinpoint. You decide to claim that distinct smell as Tae.

One of his forearms is still placed on the silver table and your eyes lock on it. You hate that your hand trembles as you skim your fingers along his sinewy muscles. And you hate even more how loud your heart is beating. So loud that you can't even hear yourself breathe. Are you even breathing?

You're expecting to feel the burst of light that transports you into a vision but all you see is spazzing static. Like it's struggling to come to fruition. This... this isn't right. You should be able to see a thousand flashing pictures of him and his future beloved. How come all you're getting is unclear feedback? You almost draw back from shock. It's not possible that you can't see the end of his line, is it? What would that even mean? That he doesn't make it to the point where he meets his soulmate? Is his soulmate even alive? Your mind is racing for something to justify why everything looks so bleak behind your eyelids. But Taehyung remains perfectly still, his other arm nonchalantly draped on the edge of the booth behind you, his body turned toward yours. However, you don't miss the way his breathing shudders faintly.

Somewhere deep inside of you, you're desperate to show yourself that this thing between the two of you isn't possible. You need to see his soulmate. You need to be reminded that no matter what, he and you aren't on the same wavelength. Can never be on the same wavelength. Your hands rise from his skin and you hesitate, shy almost by what you want to do. Shit on ice. All you're going to do is touch a bit of his face. Why does it feel like you're about to rip a part of your soul and hand it to him in his palm like it's a corded silver platter?

Annoyed with yourself, you close the distance between your bodies.

You glance up at him and search through his eyes. He gives you nothing back. So, you rage on. Running your fingers up his jaw, across his cheek. Little fireflies spark at your touch, sending prickles of awareness over your skin, up your clothed thighs. You swallow hard and press your legs together. Can he tell? You're too apprehensive to check his eyes so, you keep your focus on his face.

This is a mistake. The air between the two of you is changing now, shifting to something tighter, closing in on your airways. A buzz hums through your bones, and his expression draws into something intense, his focus never waivers from yours. In this instant, you know him. You know him. All of him. You feel like you've known him your whole life like you've been anticipating for him to come back from wherever he has been.

Suddenly sensitive, your own lips part slightly. Somehow, your body has moved closer. You can't help yourself, dammit. You trace the bottom crook of his bottom lip with your forefinger.

Thunder of the Wicked Witch of the West, this is a grave mistake. Not only has your mind melted into a puddle of nothingness. You're getting an influx of information transmuting straight to your head. Befuddled memories suddenly coming out of years induced haze. You see Taehyung and you see someone else. You see them holding each other's arms, you see the look of pure adoration in his eyes. Fuck show me their face! But instead the fog clears, and you come back to the present.

In a daze, you feather your fingers across his lips again. The contrast between his soft yet firm mouth sends a bolt of pure, shocking want straight to your heart. You want to be that person in the vision. You've never felt this type of attachment with any of your previous requests. You've never felt the upending strings in your chest come undone. You've heard of intense connections, but you've never experienced one before... until now. There's no other word for what is happening in this moment. No other way to rationalize your actions. You follow the upper curve, and holy shit, you can't stop imagining his mouth moving over your skin.

You should stop. You are a pro-freaking-fessional. You should absolutely demonstrate some self-restraint. You tell yourself this even as you keep at tracing his mouth, the corners of it, his chin. Tae breathes lightly through his parted lips, and each exhale sends a little gust of soft heat over you.

You want him to push just a little bit closer and close the distance completely. But he won't. Not when his slim, slender hand has fallen to your hip, branding you, his fingers clasping in such a way that's a little possessive as it is protective.

Colorful city lights strobe in from the big paneled window, lighting Taehyung's face in a way that makes it turn to liquid gold. What the fuck am I doing here? Like some masochist, killing yourself slowly. You shouldn't be here, stealing the spotlight of someone else. But the idea of leaving is as dreadful as asking you to cast a reducio spell. Not happening.

You want to — no, you need — to feel more. And that need takes a mind of its own. Your whole body vibrates with a please, please, please as you feel his sharp intake of breath a nanosecond before your lips slowly graze his. Gods. Good gods, that's good. Actually no, the word to be used is phenomenal. His lips are silky-firm, lusciously smooth. You do it again, this time touching the corner of his mouth.

You press into his mouth, greedy, needy. You've never acted like this before. It's like some succubus of lust has taken control of your body and you can't do anything about it. Your thumbs bracket the corners of his face as you taste him. A small whimper sounds between the two of you. You don't know if you let it out or he did. There's no way it's you. You've never whimpered in your life. But then you make another one and fuck, it doesn't matter. You've become positively obsessed with his mouth, taking kiss after kiss.

His tongue dips inside and you swear you see stars dance and spark behind your eyelids. He groans as he uses a hand to tilt your head and deepen the kiss. His hand on your waist is like liquidized fire, searing your skin. Gods, this is bad. This is really bad. Kisses aren't supposed to be like this. You've done it countless times with countless people, but it has never affected you like this. The vibrations of his deep, low, almost feral moan send a throb through your body. Suddenly you want to knock the baseball cap off his head and run your hands through his hair. But before you can do so, you break apart for air.

And it's now, with the cool air-conditioned breeze of Vee's blowing over your glowing face that you realize where exactly you are. You all but jump ten feet in the air to get away from him. Taehyung isn't a warlock. NOPE. He has to be something else. Maybe an incubus? You're inhumanly mortified over the way you downright jumped Tae.

Another wave of embarrassment floods through you when you realize the stares of the other patrons inhabiting the diner.

Shit. It isn't never been your style to do public showings.

Slowly, oh' so slowly because the embarrassment™ is too much, you look up to catch his gaze. Unexpectedly though, his expression isn't smug. It's more thoughtful and a bit gentle. "So, what did you see?"

You're not sure you can remember. You're not sure you want to be honest and tell him you don't know. "Be honest, did you do all this simply for me to kiss you?"

"No." He refutes your question, but his focus drops to your throbbing lips. "Truthfully, I just wanted you to touch me."

His words leave you more breathless than the kiss and it takes you a long moment to get your brain up and running. You have no idea what to do with yourself. And now let's get another misconception out of the way: you love physical attraction (not that you have that much experience.) But you don't do this. You don't make out with guys who aren't at all your type. You don't kiss almost-perfect strangers. And you absolutely do not hit on a person that asks you to find their soulmate. That's just asking for tons and tons of awkwardness.

When you don't say anything in return, Taehyung sighs dejectedly. Like you just rejected him or something. But you're having a tough time coming to terms with everything. Taehyung's soulmate isn't you. At least, you're eighty-eight-point eighty-eight percent sure. You didn't get a clear view of the face, but it can't be you. You won't entertain the thought only to have it pulled under your feet later. But then, why the fuck is your heart beating so deafeningly loud that all these arguments swirling in your head no longer make any sense?

"I'll walk you home," Tae says quietly. Your face snaps to his, and he recoils. "And no, your sisters didn't ask me to do that." He glances at the window for a second. "This is all me."

"Okay."

Home sounds like a way better plan. The only problem is that you want to go alone and not have to face Tae any more than you already have. Sultriest kiss of your life or no, this is something you cannot do again. Kim Taehyung is dangerous to your convictions in many ways. And you know, you just know, that come what may, he can become an addiction if you take another taste of him. And we all know that's not something you genuinely want.

The local university prides itself on having extremely hard, very-possible to bring you to tears Math classes. So, it was staple reasoning that everyone came to class to pick out the best seats. Today, however, Ionia had needed you to drop some packaged stardust (store-bought glitter actually because stardust does not exist! No one has flown to the stars and survived long enough to crush one) to a delivery drop-off.

Your sisters' magical shop is the only thing connecting them to the human world and although more than everything they sell is authentic, sometimes clients just want the most inane things. Like who thinks stardust would actually give them supernatural tendencies? The supernaturals themselves don't even believe in stardust. Hard to believe in something that hasn't been proven or fact-checked.

You take a seat near the back of the class and pull out your notebook, pencils, and a calculator. You might hate math with every atom of your being, but you'll hate failing this class even more. The professor is running later than usual, and seats are filling up faster and faster. You begin twiddling with the edge of a ruled paper to pass the time.

"__?"

Jerking up your head so fast that dark spots dance in your vision for a hot second, you wonder if you heard wrong. Thinking it was the professor, you're ready to answer when you realize the voice that spoke was deeper, laced in an intrinsic feel of confidence and molten-syllables. The voice takes ahold of your spine, making it prickly straight and goose-bump museum-worthy. Surely the voice you'd heard couldn't possibly be the one it really was. No, Gods no, not him. He cannot be in this class. He wasn't here last week, but you also hadn't paid attention last week... or the week before that. Shit.

And even as these thoughts run wild in your brain, your traitorous body waves a yellow happy flag in the command center.

Preparing yourself, you turn and come face to face with your weekend tormentor, the best kisser of your life, your ex-childhood friend. Kim Taehyung. Of all the universities loitered around the city, of all the courses, of all the seats... this time there's no cap on his head, a black beanie takes that spot, but his wide brown eyes twinkle. There's a knowing humor in his gaze that it tugs a smile from the tips of your lips.

And you shouldn't be smiling. The last time you'd been in the same vicinity as him, you had practically mauled his lips with yours. Holy fuck. This is embarrassing as hell. You bite your tongue and will yourself to push all thoughts of kissing far, far away from your mind. You already spent all weekend trying to justify your actions to no avail. You can't spend the next fifty minutes doing the same thing.

"What are you doing here?" You ask, dropping the pencil from your grip.

"I'm in this class. Have been all semester. What are you doing here?"

Instead of replying to him verbally, you raise your Mathematics textbook up from the desk and show him. It's weird that you hadn't noticed him before. He stands out... in more ways than one. Everyone seems to gravitate towards him as if he's the center, even though the desk you're currently at is at the way back. Weird but not Tae doesn't seem to mind it. He flops into the free seat next to you and begins to slowly pull out his belongings.

This is the point you should apologize. You know this and yet you can't fight the words out. Like something is holding your vocal box tight and wouldn't let go. You clear your throat. You have to apologize and let him know that his soulmate is out there and there's a high chance it is not you. So, whatever this is needs to stop. It needs to stop before you embarrass yourself further.

"So, I was thinking," Tae is the first to break the silence. "How accurate are your visions?" When he sees the offended look on your face that's bound to be there because how dare he question your talents? He adds quickly. "Not that I won't believe whatever you say. I'm a mere warlock, after all, you're the real magic maker."

Not really but flattery gets him somewhere. You shrug your shoulders, attempting to calm the nervous feeling budding up your lungs. Your visions are more than accurate... when you actually get to see them. Taehyung is a whole new variety that you haven't seen before. And you've seen too many supernatural things for this to be such an issue. But here you are.

"Usually I'm a hundred percent sure, but with you, I'd say eighty something."

His eyebrows shoot up. "Eighty? Does that make me special?"

"A little. I think I need more time to... touch you."

Oh no that came out so wrong and your eyes widen when the full implications of your words register in your head. Did you just pose an innuendo to this guy? Holy shit, Sara was right when she told you last night that you were fucked. Clearly, you can't trust your lips to say anything meaningful if this is the kind of bullshit it spits out when it's in control.

You fumble to take your words back to whence they came. "I don't mean it like that. I mean, I do need to touch you, just not like that."

"Like what?" Tae asks, genuinely confused.

Take your vocal chords out and incinerate it. "Nothing."

He laughs, and it only reminds you that he has an amatory laugh. All at once, you want to go back to that night in the diner and stay in there for a while. You desperately want to go back to the time when you hadn't peered into his foreseeable future.

You wish you hadn't seen him paired up with someone else because you want this. You've never felt this before. Is this what you preach to the masses that come to your door? This overwhelming feeling that's threatening to tear through the butterflies beating in your chest? Maybe. You wouldn't know. But damn have you missed out.

"So, you didn't see anything? Not even a hand?" The laughter is still bubbling through his voice as he makes his inquiry.

"All I can say is that you have a soulmate. Somewhere out there, there's someone made just for you."

Taehyung nods his head, turning your statement over in his head. "Neat." He taps his neatly-cut fingers on the polished desk, creating a light rap sound. "What happens if this person isn't someone I want?"

Unintentionally, a scoff leaves your lips and you barely manage to not roll your eyes. "That's not going to happen."

"Okay. But if."

"If and only if, then I guess you get to do whatever you want. Fall in love with whoever, but they might not fall in love with you back."

"Isn't love supposed to be greater than that?"

Maybe. Possibly. Yes. But there's a system to this thing. The universe and the Fates decide who you end up with, although they couldn't be worried about the semantics of things. Of course, they've paired almost everyone up with someone else. They haven't paired you... yet. But as you've said: it's all semantics.

With a bustle of heavy panting and almost splayed papers, the professor finally makes an appearance in the classroom, walking in a straight bee-line to the front. "Sorry, sorry. Parking." He says as an excuse and a reprieve because every car-driving being on campus knows how hellish it is to find parking space at these hours and honestly, in general.

At the end of the time bracket, you take extra time with packing up, detergents have nothing on you with the way you clean off shaved rubber from your desk. A stupid giddiness flitters through you when you realize that Tae is waiting for you instead of charging out of the classroom.

So, what if the talk about the possibilities of love put you through a hard loop? You've heard of people rejecting their soulmate, but it doesn't add up. Why would someone do something fatal like that? For who? Who would ever be worth the risk?

It's when you're rising from your chair, one hand firmly placed on the desk that your fingers accidentally slide and brush against Tae's. The heat of his fingertips sends tiny fractures of awareness over your resolve. Maybe you don't know that much about love as you think you do.

You won't – can't– pretend there isn't attraction skittering between the two of you. And even though every bone in your body is telling you to let it go, you know your body and mind are not on the same page. Never have and probably never will.

"Are you busy after this?"

"Um," you wrack your head for anything you have yet to do but come up with nothing. "Not really. Why?"

You shouldn't be looking at his lips. Heck, maybe you shouldn't even trust yourself with just talking with him. Gods know how forgone you already are.

"There's a gig I'm playing in a few hours and..." You've never seen Tae get flustered before but holy the reddening of his cheeks is too cute too ignore. "If you're free then, I was wondering if you'd come?"

"You're in a band? That's illegal, you can't be both a warlock and a musician. It's unfair to humans."

Speaking of things, you shouldn't do, flirting with him is definitely Type A on the list. And another thing, Taehyung shouldn't be both cute and sexy, it's unfair on the bits of your soul that are being affected right now.

When he doesn't answer your pseudo-question, you grin. "Are you blushing, Tae?" You reach out and poke his cheek, all while he stretches out and catches your wrist safely between his fingers. The action is so fast that for a moment you forget to exhale.

Mathematically, you know time cannot freeze. Magically, you know Tae wouldn't have had the time to cast a time-stopping spell without you noticing. But forever it is worth, time completely stops. His liquid gold eyes scan your face before everything blurs out of focus.

In this foresight, you see Taehyung on a small stage, you have no prior knowledge of musical instruments, but you know that it's a bass guitar resting across his frame. And you see his smile, it's brightening by the second and it blitzes straight through your chest because he's aiming it at you. Or no, you don't know, he could be directing it at his soulmate somewhere in the crowd. But in this moment, it's you.

Hope sparks in your veins, something you hadn't given yourself the opportunity to believe in. And beneath your haze, you know he feels it too. You can see it in his lightning eyes and the swift beating of his heart against his chest. This is why you shouldn't touch, much less have kissed, Tae. Because now you can't stop rerunning it in your head. You know what he tastes like now. And what he tastes like is sweet, sweet addiction.

"So, what about it?" Taehyung asks in a low, vibrating voice. And he must sense your palpable confusion because he adds. "My band's performance. Will you be there?"

"Time and place. I'll be there." What's the harm in that? It's not like you're going to fall head over heels for him. You have more sense than that. You are a guru of love. You know everything, you tell yourself. And what this is, is deep infatuation and you can definitely chase the zings away with cold, cold, cold water.

Famous last words, right?

It feels like the grand inspection as your sisters and stable coven member, Hoseok, scrutinize your attire in the middle of the living room. Suddenly, you feel highly inadequate in your ripped black jeans, turtleneck sweater, and coat. You think you look good, but the looks of horror on Ionia and Sara's face beg to differ.

"You can't possibly want to go meet the love of your life in this," Sara's voice borders on disappointment and disgust.

"I mean, the jacket is kinda cute." Hoseok raises a flag in your defense.

Ionia spurts out a laugh at that remark, effectively tearing the flag to pieces. "I could lend you my halter top? You know the gold one?"

You love your family and your friend, you truly do. You'd take on a winged fire dragon for them. But you can't believe you set yourself up for this interrogation. Asking them to help you get ready for this non-date, was a disaster ready to happen. And there's no one to blame but you for wanting extra validation.

Biting your tongue to prevent a snarky statement that'll only cause this conversation to drag out longer, you calm yourself by exhaling a deep breath. "It's winter, dearest sister. Unless you want me back in a body bag, let me wear this jacket in peace," then you swivel your attention to the other hawk in the room. "And Sara, please for the love of everything, Tae isn't the love of—"

Ionia cuts through your monologue. "It's September!" Just as Sara wiggles her eyebrows goofily. "Tae, huh. Guess you guys are closer than I thought."

Instead of deigning either comment with a response, you turn around and grab your phone and keys from the sofa, safely tucking them in the back pocket of your jeans before glancing back at the trio. You pity for Hoseok who got dragged into staying with them as they practice new incognito spells.

"Have fun babysitting them, Hobi," you call out, raising a fisted palm to your chest in salute. "I pray for your safety."

Hoseok chuckles even as he uses a hand to reciprocate your salute. "I can handle it."

You make it a pointed effort to not say your goodbyes to your sisters before running out of the house. It's a fifteen-minute walk to the bar that Taehyung's band is playing at and you want to be there deathly on time. Not because you want to see his face again so quickly, of course not, but rather because this is what good friends do. Or at least what they should.

You are going to go there and be the most supportive person in the crowd. You vow on it. You'll be good. You wouldn't dare to wish for things you can't attain again. You'll allow the fates to work their magic on whoever that's meant for Tae. If it happens to not be you, then...

"Oh, fuck it." You say aloud, dunking your cold fingers in the pockets of your navy-blue coat.

Continuing the route to the bar in the silence of your mind, you realize that your brain actually does know how to shut up, just when it's on its own terms. And you guess, neither your head nor your heart wants to think about the possibility of you and Tae getting together. Sadly, because the probability is so low that it feels like your wishing on a goddamn star for a miracle.

You reach there faster than you anticipate with ample time before Taehyung's group is scheduled to go on stage and now you wonder if it's okay for you to just walk in? Well, of course, it should be. But what if he's busy entertaining his fans? You find it hard to picture him without any. With his killer smile and rumbling voice, it would be hard not to fall. You rub your palms together in a bid to warm them up faster but also to stall the inevitable meeting. You pace outside the bar, wondering if it's possible to cancel now.

Something bumps into your shoulder and you almost topple over from the impact but fortunately, someone catches you by your forearms, keeping you upright and saving your face from an impromptu make out with the cemented floor. It's a brief moment but you're thankful for wearing a coat today. Nothing worse than having a moment of seeing their love life in the middle of the pathway.

The first thing you notice about the person that caught you is the impish point of his ears and then the floppy coffee-colored hair on his forehead. You're in the process of thanking him and apologizing for putting him in this situation when he lets out a loud surprised sound from deep in his throat. You swear it sounds like a squeal.

"You're that lady from the diner!" He sounds excited for some reason, so you look up from your boot-clad feet and focus on his face.

"What?"

"Vee's," he says. "I work there. And your friend, well I guess our friend, Taehyung was with you the other day... Unless I have the wrong person. Then, I am so sorry for this inconvenience." He looks completely mortified at the possibility of this happening.

The corner of your lip lifts up as your mind remembers him. "Yeah, I guess that's me. My name's __. by the way. You're Jungkook, right?"

He nods as his face brightens up like he was a switch that can be so easily accessed. His smile puts you at ease though, at least you know someone in what seems to be a mass of people if your peeking through the glass door is anything to swear by.

"Oh, you haven't seen Taehyung tonight, have you?" Jungkook asks as he pulls the bar door open and lets the smell of alcohol, perfume, and other unidentified scents weave their way to where you stand.

Shaking your head, you drag your palms against the rough pattern of your jeans before you walk into the loud bar. People are everywhere and its impossibly hard to find any free space. You're about this close to breaking away and walking back home but then you remember that Jungkook is right behind you and he'll most likely snitch you out to Taehyung when he gets the chance.

You sigh out as Jungkook takes a step beside you. You scan his outfit and notice the black muscle tank top that he has on and then you notice the glittery glint of three silver earrings dropping from his left ear.

Before you can scan any lower, he bends his head a little. "We go on in about ten minutes." He chortles out above a whisper but a decibel lower than the chatter around the two of you.

"We?" Your eyebrows dance across your forehead.

"Of course." He shoots you a grin that is supposed to be heart-melting, and it is. Just not in the same way Taehyung's affect you. Now you wonder if this is how it's going to be; you consistently comparing everyone else to Taehyung. "I'm the drummer after all."

"That's so cool."

"I know," Jungkook mock bows at your compliment. "Anyways, I have to get backstage or else I owe the rest of the band lunch for a month." He gags at the prospect before he's waving at you and weaving his way through the horde of people. People stop and stare as he jogs past, they move away and create a river just for him to pass by and then they regroup into clusters and squeal and gossip about him.

It's an odd thing to notice but he doesn't look the least affected by it. But now you feel like the only sober person in this bar. You bite your lip as you keep your head down and scramble for a good position to see the stage.

There's a real problem though. The place is packed so full that you have to stand at the back just to be able to breathe. But there's so much anticipation swelling in your veins at just the thought of getting to hear him perform. You fold your arms across your chest, waiting for anything to happen. And its when you're not paying acute attention, fiddling with apps on your phone, that the screams of other people jolt you into the present.

The chants are loud and deafening and overpower the anxious feeling in your chest. And then as your eyes are filtering across the stage, they connect with his. It should be impossible for him to be able to see you all the way from where he stands in the center. It should be impossible for him to even know where you are in this colossal of bodies. But his gaze is unwavering and the knowing smirk gracing his face is anything short of accidental.

You check around your surroundings for anyone that he could be looking at but there's no one that looks anything other than a fan or a casual drinker. You peer up at him, this time holding his gaze with your own and his smile breaks forth. It lights a galaxy inside you.

"Hello everybody, I hope everyone has been having a good night so far," he starts. He looks across the crowd in front of him as they scream for him before he checks back on you. "We've been working on a few songs since the last time you saw us and quite honestly I'm a little bit nervous to perform it in front of you guys tonight."

One of his bandmates, a fair-headed lanky boy rolls his eyes at his statement and like telepathy, Taehyung laughs into the mic. "Lemme guess, Yoongi just rolled his eyes right now." Yoongi rolls his eyes again but smiles as he turns around to tune his guitar.

You're blown away by the level of comradery they have. All four of them. Jungkook is behind the drum set, blowing kisses to the girls up front and distracting them from Tae's speech. The one behind the keyboard looks mightily model-like in nature. With a piercing gaze and soft breached smile, he looks into the crowd with a relaxed ambiance.

"As usual we have JK on the drums, Jin on keyboard," Jin bows and waves and you put a palm to your chest to prevent its palpitations. He's ridiculously pretty. "Yoongi doing whatever the hell he does with that guitar." His statement earns a laugh from everyone listening, including you. Yoongi himself doesn't find it as hilarious though, he scrunches his nose and shakes his head. "I'm Taehyung and thank you for coming out to listen to Indie Magic Tendencies."

He throws one last toothy smile into the audience, rubbing his palms together before then grabbing the mic with two hands. "Before I forget, today's performance is dedicated to a special friend of mine in the crowd right now."

An electric wire grapples around your chest, forcing you to stand up straight and cease breathing as he continues, this time with his focus on you. It's like he's calling you out. "I'm not trying to bend your beliefs or go against what you think the world wants. But sometimes two people have to really, really, want each other to be for the universe to listen."

You're not present as Jungkook reaches up and grabs his mic to say, "and here's our song: let me." You're not present as the slow and even smoother voice of Taehyung and Jin slithers into the ears of the patrons in the bar. You don't even notice as the loud cheers of the fans decrease into a low mumble as if they too are holding their breath. You can't make sense of anything going on around you in this moment because of the insanely loud thump of your heart as it struggles to beat in your chest.

You'd become dismissive of the idea of love in relations to you. It's awfully hilarious that you are realizing this now, with the one person you would love to spend forever with in front of you. You've hidden behind this notion that the Fates decide everything. And although the Fates, in all their gloriousness, mean no harm. Why does it have to be you? You've seen countless people that did not stick to your assigned pairings that go on to have rewarding lives with each other. Even though you are right, you are also wrong?

Why do you have so much love to give but nothing to receive? Why do you have to be the only abiding by rules that no one else sees? Why do you have to be graceful and accept this stalemate that has been placed upon you?

Everyone — witches and warlords, elves and faeries, vampires, and lycanthropes – they all believe in this innate magic. Magic that sprouts from the trees like water before spraying into the air. Magic that swims far deep within you and drowns out everything. You've been taught to only reach for things that are given to you. Never step outside your jurisdiction. You are not a witch. You don't have a mass of reserved magic. What you have is fleeting. One touch one memory. It's not fixed. You shouldn't wish for more. Shouldn't long for it either.

And for a while, you've been completely fine with it. It's not like someone had shot through your axis and shaken your atmosphere before. Taehyung's arrival has shown you the other side that you haven't been attuned to. This unreasonable want for something — someone. And the unbearable need to attain.

You bite your lip and slink deeper into the shadows, hoping that for whatever its worth, Taehyung doesn't have excellent eyesight because you're this sure that your myriad of conflicting emotions is highlighted in bold across your face.

Pulling out your phone from your coat pocket, you open the messages app and do what any other sane person would do in this situation. You text Sara.

Can I ask you something?

Her reply is almost instantaneous. Shoot.

What's your take on the whole Taehyung situation?

Lmao. You hear her laughter ringing in your ears. What situation? According to you, there's nothing there. Remember? All that "I'm destined to never find love" bs you were talking about?

You want to burn. Actually, no. You want to hide. Forget about that. This is serious, okay! I really like him. It's weird and I've never felt this way about anything, absolutely nothing. And I know he likes me too, it's just... ugh.

Sara: Okay relax. First of all, liking him is good. Him liking you back is a bonus, be happy!

Typing a fast response, you prod the inside of your cheek with your tongue. You're not helping at all.

Sara: Hahaha, well you haven't told me what to exactly help with so....

It's obvious. He has a soulmate out there and I don't. What about ten years down the line and he finds them and suddenly I'm like a discarded chew toy. I don't want that.

Sara: fuck that noise. Soulmates are just people, __. You think you just find someone and immediately want to be with them because some god told you so? Heck, no. you like Taehyung, right? You just have to figure out how much you like him. And I'm not saying your abilities are whack or wrong, but sometimes you just know, you know. You know who you wanna to be with and who knows? Maybe the fates will listen. Idk

You try not to laugh at the irony of her and Taehyung saying essentially the same thing. This is a serious conversation and you shouldn't be laughing but the irony isn't lost on you. You turn off your phone before dunking it back into your pocket. Sara's right; fuck that noise. You're gonna do it. You're going to walk up to him once he finishes sweating up that stage with his sexy as sin voice and mad good guitar skills and tell him –

There's a loud ping! as your phone chimes with a new message. Reaching into your pocket, you see the new text Sara has sent you.

There are a gazillion people in the universe. You've met a thousand and then some extra since the day you were born. But there's only one person that you can connect with on a deep, natural level... there's only one Kim Taehyung. And if it's him? Why do you have to settle for someone else?

It's almost fitting that as you see the shining behind the puzzle maze, the crowd cheers in a deep mix of squeals and cries as Indie Magical Tendencies wrap up their set for the night. Jungkook has taken Taehyung's previous position and is thanking the crowd for coming out. Grinning wide and eyes shining brighter. And then you're frantically searching the stage for Taehyung but he's not there anymore.

Your confidence is waning. This is a bad idea. Your testing fate. It's never gonna work out anyway. You're going to be disappointed in a few months when everything turns lackluster and boring and you'd wish you had listened to your head instead of your heart.

Then suddenly, he's in front of you, as if you conjured him up from thin air. You know that's not the case but it's nice to believe. He opens his mouth to say something you'll never know because you beat him to it faster.

"I need to talk to you." The too-full establishment makes it hard to hear yourself so you add, a little bit louder this time. "Let's go outside."

He hears you and soon his long fingers are searing into your skin as they wrap around your wrist and lead you out the back door. You don't pay attention to the looks, or the sighs, or the gasps. You're focusing your energy on trying to see his soulmate and still, you see nothing but static. It doesn't matter anyway, you realize, you're about the most selfish person on the planet. Or at least that what you think.

Outside is colder as the night has finally settled but it doesn't feel as bad with him next to you. The back of the bar is a dumpster heaven but at least its quiet and you can hear the loud badump! of Tae's heart, it's rivaling yours. You lean against the brick of the building, needing the extra support.

You start. "I-I intended to listen to your voice tonight, but it really was nothing but an intention because I couldn't listen."

His fingers release your arm as he raises them to his chest in faux hurt. "Yikes, my voice isn't that bad –"

"Your voice is amazing!" You are quick to say. "It's because of what you said earlier. This — everything, is new to me. I've never felt like this for anyone."

"Neither have I."

"But you're you," incredulity laces your tone. "There's no way you haven't. You're cool and calm and a wizard that knows how to play the fucking guitar and sing and you're beautiful. Like insanely. You could projectile vomit on someone and they'll thank you."

He laughs at your wordy compliment. "Sure, it's possible that other people have felt that way about me. But I can't remember ever falling so hard for someone else before."

"What about soulmates and the future and..." your voice is weak, your resolve weaker and he capitalizes on that.

"When you touch me you don't see anything, do you?"

Your breath stutters in your throat and you choke on it which pushes you into a coughing fit. Ah shit, this is embarrassing as hell. Taehyung is kind of laughing at you, kind of looking concerned for your wellbeing until the last of the cough wheezes past your lips. You curl your fingers at your side as you look up at him. You take nervously calming breathes to gain your voice back.

"I don't. I see you laughing, and I see that you're happy, but I don't see th—"

"Exactly! To say or even think that one can or should wait for their entire existence for this soulmate to come around is an oxymoron, an impossibility. People eventually always get sick of waiting. I'll probably get sick of waiting. No one waits forever for someone they don't even know."

"But—" Your admonishment is shallow on your lips.

"I choose you."

He says the words with such confidence that it leaves you flustered, and with your brain desperately searching for something to say. But all that leaves you with is your mouth opening and closing before remaining agape. Your body is heating up, you don't know to calm down. You don't want to.

"What if you had a soulmate?" You are fighting the expansion of your cheeks because he's looking at you like this whole situation is funny and maybe it is. You're fishing for comments and he accepts the bait.

"I don't care," Tae says. "I would have found you again. I would have done something. I don't know, conjured up some daemon from the netherworld and sold my soul." He has a way with words, even the most terrifying thing doesn't sound so bad when it leaves his lips.

You think this to be the end of his spiel, but Tae doesn't stop there. It's as if he's trying to convince you with every bone in his body that there is magic between the two of you and he doesn't want to stand around doing nothing when he can so clearly feel it.

"And what about soulmates? What do you think my chances are of finding a shared soul in this hell of a universe? What if I've already met them but didn't do anything about it because I was banking on a particular trigger I don't feel? I'll be fortunate if I can find just one person who'll be able to put up with me for the rest of eternity.

"Only twice in my life have I ever felt this inexplicable, nearly transcendental pull to a person. But it wasn't two, it was only one. It's only been you. I don't know what's happened to make your memories of our childhood befuddled, but that doesn't even matter. In the end, I want to make it work with you. I want to take you out on dates, I want to learn what makes you laugh the hardest, I want to be with you, __. But if you truly do not feel the same as me, I'll go. I'll find that soulmate, that's not supposed to be you, and hope, whatever happens, happens for the best."

His face is deathly close to yours, breath fanning against your heating cheeks. His words have the ability to break you undone but put you back together again and again. You should be selfish. Here he is in front of you, pouring his beliefs and soul and you should too. You don't have to hide behind barricades you placed for yourself. You want him. You want to experience this. You—

"Okay."

"Okay?" His eyebrows crunch, a lithe smile appears.

You nod your head vigorously. "Okay! Let's do it. Fuck the fates. I want you too. And you'll be sorely mistaken if you think, or if they think, I'll stand here and aide you in leaving me. I can't explain it either, but I feel it. It's not something I can express."

"It's not something you have to express. You either know or you don't."

"You're right." You agree. "I also know that now that we've cleared all that up, I'm a hundred percent down with making out with you right now. Just putting that out there. You know, if you were, uh, wondering."    

"Really?" Taehyung asks, moving closer to you till you're backed up hard against the wall. "You want to kiss me in the back of semi-smelly pub?"

You shrug your shoulders as Taehyung reaches up with his fingers and caresses your cheek. He has really sexy fingers you notice for the millionth time. "Can't you do some hocus pocus spell and do some invisibility cloak or something? I mean, you're a warlock."

"Hm, I could do all of that. But that's going to take like, what, three minutes? I could just take up your offer and," he bends his head low and places feathers with his lips all across your jawline. Little fledglings of heat spark up from his touch. But then the tips of his sweaty hair tickle your cheek and you pull back in laughter.

"You know what?" He has his arms wrapped around your waist and a confused pout on his lips. "We should restart." Taehyung nods his head agreeing. "Yeah, I should probably take you out on a proper date before I get handsy."

"We literally kissed the first day we met each other."

"But that was for an experiment. A hot one. But an experiment no less. That doesn't count as our first kiss."

You laugh as the two of you break apart and you stare up at him as you try to regain your breath. He looks ethereal and you wonder how you look in his eyes. You reach up with your fingers and push his hair back so that it doesn't tickle your face again and then you push up and place your lips firmly against his.

There's no all-consuming fire that melts your bones in one sweep. Instead, there are high definition images screening through your mind showcasing the two of you. Together. You see yourself and you see him and you see bits of your life in between. And you look happy. You look deliriously so. Taehyung maneuvers your body closer and you get lost in him. Your thoughts scatter and you forget your own name but the feel of Taehyung's concrete chest against your own, with his own heart beating out of sync places a smile on your face.

Breaking apart from him is a challenge that you don't want to complete if not for the nagging in your lungs for air. Your mind is frazzled, your face heated and your chest full.

"I saw your soulmate."

"Yeah?" He whispers out. "I already know who it is."

You giggle. "You do?"

"Of course. I can see it on your face," he pauses then nods his head once. "It's you."

a/n » this was long and im very thankful to everyone who reads this and i hope you really enjoyed it bc i had so much fun writing it! :) thank you so so much for reading >.<

⇢ masterlist

©️ 2018 kai, moonbelt [aka high-on-food]

[seven-oomen]

Hi, Ben!  Hope you had a good day, or at least a calm one!  I think your tree is adorable, and I love your tree topper!  It’s so pretty!  Also, my congrats if Mo leaves it alone.  Most of the kitty parents I know are full of horror stories about their cats climbing the tree/trying to eat the tree/trying to eat things off the tree/etc.  XD  One friend’s cat earned herself the nickname Monkey because the very first thing she did the night they brought her home was go right up the tree.  I’m pretty sure that was at least a decade ago, and the only person who ever calls her by her actual name at this point is probably my friend’s dad.  Another friend complains every year that she can’t use tinsel on her tree anymore because her cats will try to eat it.

And omg, that Disney/TW thing was terrible.  Most of them seemed to only be using the most shallow, surface level reading of the characters, as usual they seemed to forget that Disney made animated films before the early 90s, and also as usual, Noah and Melissa got left out, despite having been there the full run of the show.  I think I usually headcanon Peter more CN than anything else, but I can see the logic behind some NE being mixed in there, too.  Some of that could be because I tend to see his apparent desire for power as more of a trauma-based need for control than just purely for its own sake.  (It might have helped if they’d been a bit more consistent with his character…)

It’s probably because I was out of the fandom for a while, but most stuff I’ve seen that addresses it typically has the Hales being of British Isles descent.  I think that’s mainly because the name itself is English (I think?), and it helps to explain the abundance of Celtic mythology/imagery if it’s something they brought with them when settling the town.  I’m not particularly bothered either way, though, and always enjoy a chance to learn about other culture’s customs.  :D  And I love how everyone just agrees that Peter is the type to just casually speak like a dozen languages, just because he can.  XD  Also, I’m now picturing a springerle rolling pin that’s nothing but wolf images, a quite literally hand-carved hand-me-down (that I’m going to pretend was stored in the vault.)

And yeah, I figured the other kids would adapt pretty well, but I definitely foresee an issue with Jax.  I feel like it’s going to come down to one of his siblings having to step in, probably either Malia (because he actually likes her) being like “Hey, could you maybe try not being such an obnoxious douche-nozzle to my dad before I punch you in the throat?  Do I treat your dad that way?”, or Ben just being like “Why are you so mean to Poppa?” and then Jackson will have to face the full effect of the sad puppy face that got sprung on Stiles.  XD

 I feel like it would make sense for it to take a few full moons for a turned wolf to achieve a full shift, especially if there’s no genetic component.  Almost all the wolves we see turned in the show have a rough enough time adapting at first without throwing in something like that.  I definitely think it makes more sense for born wolves to have an easier/quicker time of it, especially at first.

I love both of the recent previews.  I seriously have been ferally screaming over the pinned one all day.  XD  The swagger.  The mountain ash.  The “goddammit Peter, he’s not afraid of you, he’s afraid for you” of it all.  And the section when he’s first shifting is good, too (no matter when it was written.)  That’s going to be freaky as hell, even if you’re expecting it.  And the whole thing with the way his bones are cracking and such just feels like it emphasizes how warped and wrong it all is, at least to me, because as best I remember, the few times we see a full shift in the show, it just sort of seems to flow from one to the other.  Also, it just occurred to me that his alpha form was almost like a perfect balance of the American Werewolf in London and Underworld versions of full shift.  I’m curious to see if he maintains that version or if the presence of his mates/pack help him heal to a more normal version.  Part of me wants to see him get better because I don’t like seeing them hurt, part of me really wants to see his beast form tackle hug Noah and Chris and try to cuddle in their laps.  XD

And oh, man, those window seats just made me want them to have one in the rebuilt Hale house, maybe in like a loft or an upper floor, that’s big enough for the three of them to cram into, or the kids, or assorted combos thereof, in whatever forms they choose.  Especially for like during storms and stuff.  Just, all the cuddles, and reading stories to the littles, and taking random naps in the sunshine, and everything.

Also, now I’m picturing Noah and Chris singing shit like “You Make It Feel Like Christmas” and “Cuddle Up, Cozy Down Christmas”, or like that “Peace On Earth/Little Drummer Boy” thing Bing Crosby and David Bowie did, while trying to make Peter a surprise breakfast, and it’s adorable.  And I’ve been listening to way too much Straight No Chaser holiday music to deal with the idea of them all singing together in anything approaching a rational manner.  And is he not supposed to look at them like they’re part of the menu?  I’m pretty sure if Peter was given the option of what he’d like to eat first…well.  XD

Those poor teachers.  They probably thought they’d lucked out with this one after Stiles and Malia, and then the holidays came around…  (Just wait until they get the next round of Haleargentski children…)  XD

And I’m going to hold you to that promise of romance XD (not really, if it doesn’t work out that way, don’t worry.)  I would say “my body is ready”, but that feels like it might come across somewhat awkward.  XD  Although it did occur to me that given how he is about the whole “your all’s shirts are way too tight to share” thing, when it gets to that point, Noah’s probably also going to have one of those “it’s been a hot minute, so some things aren’t quite what they used to be” type moments like Chris had with Peter at the motel, though I think he’d be more likely to try and joke it off, and Peter’s just going to be like “Gods, you two really are as bad as each other sometimes”, while happily reassuring both of them, because he can, and he enjoys it.

And wow, I’ve rambled on so much longer than I meant to given that I have an early shift tomorrow (or today, really…  ’>.> )  So, I hope you got some decent rest, and your meds are helping like they should, and that you are happy with what you got done on the chapter.  I hope that today goes well, too, and that you find some good candy at post-holiday discount prices, if that is a thing they do there (or will that not happen until after Christmas?)  Anyway, I hope you have a good day, whatever else happens.  Take care!  *Hugs!*

Hey hey, I honestly had a pretty good day yesterday, a little busy because of last minute store runs and an uncooperating phone. (oh joy, had to reset the bastard twice) but other than that, pretty good. 

Treated myself to a new game for Sinterklaas. It’s the Spiderman Game of the Year edition, I didn’t have that game yet and it was on sale for like 28 bucks and people left really good reviews. Maybe if I get some money for Christmas I might also get me the Miles Morales one, the new one. But I’m also getting Cyberpunk cause I pre-ordered it back in April, so we’ll see. I might just wait until Miles Morales goes on sale too in a couple of months. Still have to finish Valhalla first though XD.

And you’re not gonna believe it, but Mo left my Christmas tree completely alone. He does not care about the Christmas tree. He does not care about plants. He does not care about BOXES. I honestly think my cat is broken, but then again, I am typing this while he is sleeping in my lap and purring, so who cares.

And Omg XD I am eternally grateful Mo didn’t do that but I love Monkey and can see why they got that nickname XD What a rascal!

I mostly included NE for Peter because apparently that’s what Ian Bohen considers Peter’s Alignement to be. I personally think he’s more CN too (though I am probably basing that on his trauma.) 

I actually made a personal alignment chart for the characters in Once Upon A Time here. (Though I forgot to include three characters namely the Nurse, John,  and Danny. I think Danny would fall under either NG or LN and he would probably tell someone if someone’s shoe laces were untied, and the nurse more under LE I guess, considering her background, though I feel like she’s not evil for evil’s sake she more or less was driven to it and as such has a strong need for revenge regardless of whom she hurts, though she tries to redeem herself later. (and that’s all I will say due to spoilers). And she would probably tie the person’s shoe laces for them, old habits die hard.) John I feel like would be CG or LN and he’d be the person to untie his own shoes in solidarity. (kinda like his grandchildren Stiles and Malia, where do you think they got that one from?)

But yeah I’m still not sure how to feel about the Disney one. I can kinda see with some of them where they were coming from but none of it feels ‘flawless’ or particularly right to me? Idk. I honestly feel like Kuzco and maybe Pocahontas were the two biggest Nopes for me. I mean Scar kinda fits, Elsa, I can see that, but none of it I truly identify these characters with. Idk.

And I feel like Peter or John probably had the foresight to store some of their most prized family heirlooms in that vault. Such as a copy of the family photo, Peter’s triskelion necklace piece, a springerle with wolf inscriptions,  some video tapes of the family, personal artifacts of each family member, and Talia and John’s claws, family recipes, some gifts John made for his grandchildren, and John’s journal about the family history, werewolf lore, and lots of dirt on both Elias Stilinski and Gerard Argent.

I feel like Peter speaking lots of languages also just makes sense. He seems to be the type to have connections everywhere and to have little birds everywhere listening in for him. He would also be the type of person to either have connections to or keep an eye on the Russian and Italian Maffia, he learned French and Polish for Chris and Noah, Spanish is just a useful language to learn because it's vast. And German and Dutch were taught to him from a young age, probably some Latin too. So I can see why many people would headcanon Peter as mutli-lingual, it just makes sense for his character.

Malia and Ben ganging up on Jackson is my new favorite image. Can you imagine what the combined power of those two will be? Also just any of the teenagers realizing they can deploy the younger sibling to be absolutely adorable and people will do anything for that face, no matter what the teenagers are asking. 

As for Peter’s wolf, why not both? There’s no reason why he can’t act like an overgrown puppy as a beast and still heal and slowly revert back to his original form over the course of a couple of full moons as his mind heals from the trauma.

They’re definitely getting a windowseat big enough to seat three adults, four teenagers and a couple of little ones. Surrounded by books, a few curtains and lots of pillows. it needs to happen.

And you guessed it, there’s gonna be a shy moment where both Chris and Noah get self conscious about their bodies. Noah because, well, he gained some weight, got a bit older, has some stretch marks although he’s still goddamn fit considering what he does and he tries to play it off as a joke, Peter will show him just how sexy he is, really. And Chris has another moment because he had another baby, so more pudge, more stretch marks and due to his humanity, more scars. I think I’ll let Noah handle that one first and then Peter helps. Chris of course also worships Noah’s body, because holy shit, none of them is exactly in bad shape, but Noah’s definitely been hiding way more. Also Noah’s tall now, so Chris just sort of melts when the taller man sweeps him off his feet. We also need some Omega/Omega love in this story.

And wow, now I’ve been rambling XD. I’m gonna make me some late breakfast (it’s 1 pm) and grab some coffee and then start writing.

[protagonistheavy]

I finished BNA, spoilers below:

I always forget mobile doesn’t do keep reading lines like at all so I’m spacing this out.

Spacing.

Spacing. Okay spoilers now, somewhere.

So yeah ultimately disappointed with the show. The first four-five episodes were really intriguing with the baseball episode being a significant standout as really good. After that, the quality across the board takes a dull decline. Characters frankly don’t develop, which is the biggest problem. There’s nothing that happens that challenges a character’s morals or thoughts or anything, they just continue being the same people doing the same things, utterly regardless of what information they have.

And information in this series is poorly handled. So many things are just expositioned by Alan and in a weirdly truthful way for a character who you’d expect to be lying. Almost nothing he explains is actually a lie, none of the characters are ever truly being misled until you reach the most obvious conclusions, and then it’s just a matter of characters... being too dumb to realize it I guess? Nazuna is especially bad with this, like she doesn’t question it at all how maybe telling an entire city you’ve been lying about being Jesus might, in fact, enrage them in the exact way you’re trying to prevent.

Man I don’t even know how to organize my thoughts because mentioning one problem highlights two others. Nazuna was just a really badly written character with no flow, no development, and nothing interesting going on for her. Her perspective isn’t fleshed out in all this, and every time we see her, she has the same attitude as before, never changing to what’s happening around her. She does what she does, and Michiru just reacts to whatever the mood is today. Her relationship with Boris is just a total pitfall, it gets hyped up as something you’d think would be important, and then it just crashes into a very uninteresting climax with Boris revealed to be obsessed with Nazuna -- exactly like we were told he’d be? Like, the plot just really straightforwardly explains itself and leans into its expectations... There’s never a point where a plot twist really changed anything, at most the reveal with Alan was the only big twist and even then, it didn’t alter the stakes or change the meaning of perspectives or anything. It’s still the same plot except now we know the bad guy isn’t racist, he’s actually just racist.

Choppy writing all around makes things worse. Some dialogue doesn’t really make any sense or is trying too hard to be deep/important when it’s really just shallow. We’re shown like four times the flashbacks of Michiru and Nazuna around/after the accident, and we’re shown the same material because these characters have no other sense of connection. We never see them interact like friends or advance their bond. We’re just told “they are good friends” and that’s that.

And the animation... like, I dunno, I guess since my last Trigger anime to fully watch was Kill La Kill, maybe my expectations were too high? But there’s so little of that Trigger charm, that unique kind of over-the-top style. The baseball episode is partly so good because it leans on this exaggerated style all episode, but after that, you only see the animation come to life in small bursts, where at that point it feels out of place and overbearing with how plain and boring the rest of the animation has become. My guess is honestly that they overdid their budget on the baseball episode and everything after that had to be reeled in.

Related to that, the whole show felt like it needed twice as long to accomplish its narrative. There isn’t enough time and beats to get to know the cast meaningfully, the plot feels rushed despite so little really happening in it, there’s so much of the world that we only get to see in glimpses and vague mentions or implications. It should’ve been a 24 episode series for sure, it’d have let the characters breathe and allow the plot to stew.

And the elephant in the room I guess is the analogy of beastmen, Anima-City, etc. and its real world counterparts. The show clearly wants to make some statements on racism, oppression, etc. considering every other episode has some pretty obvious real life parallels, from gangs to sports to activism. But while it tries to prop these elements up as significant, everything ultimately takes a back seat to the fantastical elements, which end up eating up the show. At worst, someone could leave BNA with a very pessimistic conclusion: oppressed peoples are genetically unstable and cannot possibly live together in big enough groups or else they’ll stress each other out and cause mindless riots. Humans in this series are pretty obviously responsible for a lot of beastmen’s oppression, and then the ending tries to say, “It wasn’t REALLY the humans -- it was a beastman! One really mean beastman!” Ugh it feels like a moral or something that a 90s show for children would try to sell, it doesn’t sit with me very right at all. The potential for this show to explore oppression and minorities is just shot in the leg before it ever gets running, the writers just conveniently deciding to not actually think about those themes after awhile.

Instead they devote a lot of time to this fucking religion plot line which just adds more layers of stupid to the whole world. It’s just not a very engaging “evil religion” plot, many of its messages clearly on the nose about real world religions and how people flock to them. It really tries to overtake the series as its focus and suffers as a result, I didn’t find the whole worship of Silver Wolf to be a very engaging plot at all and it just lends itself to even worse analogies to consider. Ugh, I don’t even want to get into it...

The first half of the series is really good and fun, but the second half is drawn out and not very enticing. Honestly I think only the baseball episode is worth “recommending” lol? It’s fantastic, it’s the type of thing you expect from Trigger, it’s a very good self-contained story that pretty much nails all the best elements the rest of the show has to offer. The rest of BNA, not so much. Clumsy metaphors, choppy writing, bland characters and dialogue, straightforward animation... It’s certainly not a bad show, but it’s disappointing how the ball was dropped.

[republicstandard]

Why Civic Nationalism Fails: Groups, Biology and Ideology

A common claim amongst civic nationalists and mainstream conservatives relates to putting ideology before ancestry, believing that if a select group of people thinks in a certain way, genes aren’t important. The issue with this line of thought is in the inherent neglect of inheritance of political views, how beliefs travel generation to generation, the environment they’re raised in and the lineage which biologically constructs their sets of beliefs, ingrained into their genetic code by birth.

That is of a birthrate, the heritability of political views -genopolitics- that goes so often ignored by the right and the left, pushed aside to focus on their perceptions of what’s important in America, and the Western world in general. They claim to care for the country they inhabit, for Europe and Northern America. Problems arise when it comes down to receiving what they so fiercely desire: ideological homogeneity and societal conformity.

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Do you want good people, well-dressed, mannered, talkative, open-minded, and even straight up traditionalist varieties of people? If that’s your cause, you’re going to be disappointed in certain demographics spread across the world. The prevalence of these demographics is rapidly increasing within the United States, Western Europe, and even Oceania. This is because of mass immigration from relatively impoverished states into those made wealthy by the people who live there. It is not for them to help their own societies improve; rather flee and claim their opposition - the West - is cruel in not letting them in. It’s a cycle of victimhood displayed to granting access to many peoples who aren’t functional on the same capacity as indigenous Europeans.

Provided you’re a Republican or conservative, if it’s not genes and instead you want mere ideology, you’re going to find it only in scarcity amongst African Americans, Hispanics, East Asians, Indians, and Amerindians. You will find it in plenitude in districts of white America, and in the European American peoples. For different ethnic groups of Aryan, they have a tendency to vote for the Republican party, hold conservative viewpoints, and generally reject politically sensitive dogma utilized by wealthy politicians and bankers campaigning for non-Western immigration to the European continent. Whites, in a collective sense, have this unique tendency to turn their heads away from propaganda aimed at exterminating their people, with the exception of the self-hating clusters of liberals and globalists who wish for their own demise.

What had become of Brazil? A country which was once majority European, now mixed in with mestizoes, Amerindians, and descendants of West African slaves, fallen to low living standards and forgotten its colonial European identity. Now, that’s not to justify colonialism of any sort. It’s to say that the long, captivating history of the nation under Portuguese rule has now been undone. Brazil's reputation as, almost, part of the West, has been tarnished in the most disrespectful manner imaginable. For a country which had sought independence for so long has now been reduced to what America will be like in 25 years from now. When Europeans become a minority in America by 2043, the savagery will only increase as identity politics continue to divide the nation at an even more rapid rate, causing what will be the equivalent of an all-out civil war.

Just as the West Africans are granted affirmative action in Brazil for nothing more than being born with a certain set of racial traits, in the USA affirmative action might be an even more depressing mechanism used against a country’s white residents to punish them for their creativity, societal contributions, and efforts toward better national development. Meanwhile, non-whites are rewarded even more for rape, murder, theft, and destroying once prosperous predominantly European cityscapes and neighbourhoods.

South Africa has a white population of only 7.8% as of 2018, yet has the worst establishment of affirmative action in the world. Affirmative action is not a method of ending discrimination as it’s often phrased to be, but instead a tool handed to people who can’t produce on their own, granting them undeserved privileges and victories they didn’t fairly win. Nowadays, as the West falls into the pit of diversity and multiculturalism, losing what made it great to begin with, its native peoples and their unique cultures, affirmative action, anti-European discrimination policies in private businesses and corporations, and the refusal to prosecute actual racists of violent hate crimes against European victims (see Britain and Sweden), will only grow in tandem with racial diversity.

You can’t advocate for a state ideology or ideological homogeneity with demographics of people in large quantities who reject such principles and values and expect to prosper. I’m not a conservative, nor a liberal, but it appears that neither side will be getting what they want. Groups from the third world are the most conservative, traditionalist, and reactionary people on the planet, completely ruining any societies founded on liberalism, enlightenment, and liberty. They wish for others to conform to their ideas of morality in the most violent way imaginable, nothing to do with democracy or debate, but by means of sword and gun. In terms of playing the victim card whenever the chance is given, in the West these same people do not and are not going to have the desired conservative attitudes and respect for European traditionalist political parties the way natives will. They’ll continue to be coddled by the left for being minorities, as miscegenation and anti-civility are promoted, and identitarianism for European natives is crushed.

The truth is, I don’t want a society where moral values and traditionalism are enforced or pressured upon people, which is one of my major issues with the right. I want a socially free and liberated nation which puts its own people first, where its inhabitants are proud to be part of the culture and territory that they are, and wouldn’t dare think of sacrificing their desires and needs for that of people wish look nothing like them. A society should indeed be based on liberal values and equal authority given to each inhabitant of the same state. Traditionalism, while not mandatory, will be a crucial element in the development of identitarianism and ethnocentrism within these enlightened homelands, built upon a united collectivism for ancestry and heritage. And this same model of progressivism should be granted to any group of people who long for such a homeland.

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Nobody will be happy with the results coming in on the day we find out England as a whole is just 49% White British. A beautiful country filled with beautiful people now reduced to group conflict and prejudice perpetrated against its indigenous race. The native English are already made to feel inferior by a society which has now been colonized by people who already have a home to return to, a place for people just like them that they’ve willingly walked away from.

No matter which direction the West falls, whether left or right, whether Westerns in the future become more traditionalist or progressive, or both in certain aspects of their inner philosophies and mindsets, one thing is for sure. The anti-identitarian "conservatives" who advocated for the eradication of ethnic and racial quotas, raged at ethnonationalism, and demanded only ideology to be the coining principle of a prosperous society, they will be hanged by a mob. Ben Shapiro, especially. These people, Jordan B. Peterson, Milo Yiannopoulos, Dennis Prager, and every other unlikable face on the stereotypical right, will be rounded up by a posse, and lynched by either left-wing or right-wing identitarians.

Aren't lynchings something we should wish to avoid?

from Republic Standard | Conservative Thought & Culture Magazine https://ift.tt/2w6m0iD via IFTTT

[plus1sizeshapewear]

Coming Up Empty In Education Reform

The recent forays into public education reform from the No Child Left Behind Act, the Core Curriculum mandate, and standardize tests have all placed public education on notice that once again our policy decision makers have continued their assault on education. All they have done has resulted in a educational system that continues to fail our youth. From the used appliances houston  mainstream Republican stance of what they have done in issuing  these mandates they literally shoved down the public's throats misguided attempts at education reform. This is nothing more than political expediency. What has been occurring with all these mandates is a continuation of glossing over the real underlying problems facing education in this country. If education was run like a business there would be far more accountability and structure in our public schools today. But, like everything else our most stupendous governmental officials have done is thrown tax dollars down the toilet. Meanwhile our youth are far worse off today in educational standards compared to the rest of the world.

Someone once said just recently that teachers alone cannot change conditions in our schools. The only way to gain back the supremacy we had in educational standards that prevailed in the 1950's and early 1960's will take nothing short of a revolution. When we take a good hard look at the landscape of America today we find that the US is indeed fractured. In one hand we have the wealthiest few who control the all  plus size shapewear   too powerful politicians, Those self serving bureaucrats continue to overlook the obvious distress that the majority of Americas are wallowing in. Then there is the majority of the population, those multitudes wallowing in desperation hoping that somehow someday soon things will get better. Meanwhile our youth, the future generations of Americans continue to suffer the consequences of failed educational mandates and initiatives by a political system that by its own nature fails to grasp what really is needed to reverse the effects of years of meddling in educational policies that worked for decades prior to the late 1960's.

The one key component in education reform where students in all grade levels are able to succeed is always overlooked by our illustrious bureaucrats. When we really take a close look into America today we find their are so many children just like Bob and Jane Smith. Brother and sister both are sixth graders at Roosevelt Elementary. Typical children,  A+ certification training   but what their teachers didn't know until latter their parents lost their home when Mr. Smith got laid off and the bank foreclosed. For over a year the Smiths have had to live in a two bedroom apartment in a not so nice area. And, with only one income, a minimum wage job at Walmart many a night Bob and Jane don't get enough to eat let alone the proper vitamins and nutrition they both need during the day. When we really stop to think what is actually occurring all across the country today it is unconscionable to think that over one third of the countries school age children are literally starving. The fact of the matter is nutrition really does play the most vital role in a child's growth and development. But, what is so disconcerting is the fact that those policy makers fail to take into account that food, nutrition, vitamins and minerals are essential for not only physical development  technical schools near me   and health but are necessary for mental growth and mental health in every human being.

When schools today are judged solely on test scores the prevailing contention is that poverty should never be an excuse for poor academic achievement still remains the stance of policy makers. And, as long as test scores are at par our policy makers continue to be unconcerned if the pantries are bare, the parents jobless or worse yet in jail and the gap between the rich and poor is more appalling than it's been since 1929. We now have a whole society of mounting inequality, where the wealthiest few totally ignore, are too blind to see and just plain oblivious to  early childhood development   the harsh reality facing countless millions of children each and every day.

Food insecurity of our nations youth continues to undermine this nations ability to compete in an ever increasing global economy. But, it is not the only factor the has diminished this nations education prominence. When the Common Core Curriculum was implemented in so many states it dismantled many of the founding building blocks in elementary and secondary education that stood as the standard for over 100 years. This, regardless of all the new technology integrated into school systems still will have an adverse effect on generations of our youth. Take for example cursive writing. It is now obsolete in the minds of so many school boards. Their rational is why spend time learning penmanship where today all you need is a computer keyboard. The time spent on penmanship now can be used for more useful subjects that are more relevant to today. As many of us business analyst certification  remember it was a right of passage for generations learning how to write. Signing your name is just one of the most useful tools we use today as adults.

This is only the tip of the iceberg in education reform that is already taking it's toll on our nations youth. When one walks into any public school in Anytown USA many a baby boomer is quite shocked to see what is actually going on in our schools. All one has to do is read the latest paper to find that another school age student was bullied actually to death. Never before has this country been inundated with so many social crisis that allows public schools to be a haven for so much bulling. A moral crisis has taken over in so many parts of the country. It really does underscore that our public education reforms for the past twenty years and counting has only systematically rendered our public school system at the bottom of the what career is right for me  heap in regards to other developed countries around the world.

In education especially for elementary and secondary age youth it is vital that physical education be as important as math or science. A prime example is a private school in the state of New York that mandates the first 3 hours of every day to rigorous physical activity. In doing so these students, every one of them has excelled exceptionally in core curriculum studies such as science and math. The benefits of physical exercise whether it is competitive sports or not clearly shows a vast improvement in  SEO Company Toronto   academics. To have school systems retard or eliminate all together physical education clearly puts our nations youth not only at health risks but undermines our nations future stability and security. Many a time it is budgetary constraints that play an external factor in the elimination of Physical Ed. But, the reality is the hard cold fact that our nations youth obesity rates are among the highest in the world and consequently all the health risks related to our obesity rates do cost a hell of allot more than if we mandated Physical Ed. to begin with.

With the advent of so much technology especially the hand held personal computer has really taken it's tool on the way our youth today are being educated. Gone in so many elementary schools across the country are the days when students were required  Houston SEO Expert   stand at the old chalk board and work out math or other subject problems. Where the interaction of fellow students and teachers was actually encouraged. What we are witnessing today is the only interaction occurring is on a very interpersonal one. One can understand the importance of self confidence when students first over come the fear of standing in front of their contemporaries by trying to solve a problem at the chalkboard. That is not the case any longer.

Today, too many of our youth are being classified with ADT otherwise known a Attention Deficit Disorder. Probable cause, diet, genetics, and many consider their environment also contributes to its cause. What ever the cause too many of our youth are all lumped into this category and too many are prescribed prescription drugs like Ritalin. These drugs  luxury cars houston   do nothing to cure or direct that hyperactivity into positive constructive endeavors. From a personal point of view took place over fifty five years ago when my father took control and put me on a path that transformed my life. Back in the Fifties ADT wasn't a known diagnosis all my father knew I was a very hyper active kid, always getting into trouble. Sometimes I get caught and boy that was when corporal punishment came with a hard spank on the bottom. But, most time I managed to escape unscathed. My parents knew I was the fastest kid on the block. Nobody could catch me. It was one afternoon thought that changed all that when my father came home from work. That one afternoon while watching cartoons on our small TV was when my father pulled me aside and said "I have a present for us." He then proceeded to hand me a small wrapped box. After tearing open the box to my dismay was a small stop watch. It was from that moment on I knew my life was going in a new direction. From that afternoon on my father took me to the old  car dealerships in houston   high school track field where I was coached running 440's, half miles, and the mile. At first I loathed going but the gradual success at track and cross-country I not only succeeded in school but got into a major university.

A life long pursuit of fitness and a desire to succeed resulted because of my fathers influence, help and encouragement. Today most of our youth aren't as fortunate as I was. It is a sad commentary for our times that too many elementary age children come from single parent homes. A whole spectrum of factors are involved now that weren't back in the 1950's. What is happening today there really is a sense of foreboding tension, a silent force that is ripping across our moral fiber, a sagging truth of unprecedented demise of morality, liberty, and justice. The world we once new in our youth is no more. We now are faced with the consequences of our actions and of our inactions of what we have done in the name of social  appliances houston   liberalization in public education all across the country.

There is another factor in what has happened in our school systems over the years. It was on a recent visit to one of Tampa Bay's public schools just to see first hand what it is like to be a student today. First impressions they say are worth a thousand words. Well, in this case that first impression I was totally unprepared for what my eyes were actually seeing. Gaining entry was no small task. Nowadays one has to press a buzzer and state name and reason for your visit. It would help to call before hand to make things go allot smoother. Fortunately, this visit upon entering there were no metal detectors that from my understanding are the norm in so many other schools all through-out the country. Now, as I approach the main hallway being escorted by a teacher or teachers aid through the maze of scantly clad young girls and droopy baggy panted boys cell phones a buzzing I couldn't tell the difference between the students or my escort they all dressed very sloppily. It is a known fact that today over 40% of students do themselves  washer dryer clearance a very huge disservice by cheating on their exams when they have access to personal cell phones in class. If they do it in secondary or even in elementary levels just think of the percentage of students that cheat in college. A very disturbing fact that has a very disastrous effect in business and our whole economy suffers because of it.

Finally made it to the main office where on a small table in the corner were a stack of papers outlining necessary items each student was supposed to have in their possession. Stuffed into every bodies backpack were items such as a calculator. Oh, that really amazes me. So much for the arithmetic tables one is supposed to memorize. Next comes the hand sanitizer for our disease conscious society. Heaven forbid we forget to use soap and water. Maybe with all the budget cuts especially in our public schools soap is a luxury that now is unaffordable. With all the backpacks packed with those so-called essentials as well as the actual course books I have a feeling that this generation is going to have an awful lot of back problems as they get older. Maybe, because again of all the cut backs in the one program that will help more than any others is physical education. Now, one of the first programs to go under the ax when budgets are trimmed. As in so many instances today. One of the most disturbing trends today in our public schools there really are too many administrators. But, we got to cut physical education, arts, music appreciation and all the other so called no essential programs that would otherwise contribute to an overall educational experience.

Now, when one steps into a school it is more apparent than ever when we walk away with the realization that somehow our own society itself is to blame for this nations failings in public education. Silly me, to want our youth to have more respect for themselves as well as others. Two of the four principals this nation was built upon Education and Morality  Maternity Shapewear   both go hand in hand. The morality today, well there practically isn't any. Sure there are remnants where the morality of generations past hold true but, for the most part is sadly lacking by the majority of students in practically every public school system in the country.

The decorum that is displayed by so many sets the tone for failing or not. Amoral societies too often fall where as a society who embraces and practices basic moral values rises and flourishes. Maybe, with all the political rhetoric about creating another great society we would really look at why our society's moral values have all but disappeared. This is where and why our school systems have to reform and reestablish codes of etiquette and dress in every school. This would go a long way in bringing back moral values in our youth as well as the professionalism that our teachers must display.

When we look at other top flight educational systems through-out the world like Japan and Sweden professionalism and morality displayed keep those countries on the cutting edge of education and consequently their whole economy flourishes as a result. Just look at the period from 1952 - 1968. The United States economy reached heights never before or since attained. When morality along with education improve so does any economy. That is how to rebuild our nation.

Not only has our whole educational system been reprogrammed to do more harm than good our youth today are being continually subjected to the cultural stimulus that have had profound effects not positively mind you but have basically encouraged more of a amoral culture. The continuing escalation of youth violence whether it involves gangs,  best shapewear   other issues that could stem from the lack of parental influence, or just the way our society has changed in the last few decades all have influenced a generation of youth and their interpretation of the freedom of speech. The United States Constitution guarantees Freedom of Speech. This right comes with a responsibility. What we say does have a direct affect on the actions of others. A case in point; The Federal Communications Standard for appropriate expression on TV, radio, recordings, Magazines etc. Now studies and statistics show that there is a direct correlation with the escalation of youth violence with the relaxing of acceptable standards by public forms of communication.

Our youth are very impressionable and are not fully capable mentally of handling the responsibility of today's freedom of expression. A good example is noted in the book " Lord of the Flies." Education is the best approach but along with education has to come with it's own natural maturity that comes through the aging process from infancy through young adult. Each phase of aging comes with it's own physical, mental, and emotional progressions. If we skip from adolescence to young adult with-out going through the natural aging progressions these individuals will not be equipped in all aspects to handle the responsibilities that are imposed on the life cycle they are thrust into.

The youth of today are continually being exposed to ideas, situations, and material items they are not yet equipped mentally, physically, emotionally, and socially to effectively uses. This causes great harm not only to themselves but to society as well. What needs to be done is to reestablish the standards of conduct and speech that were enforced back in the middle of the 20th century. The rebuilding of ethical standards is essential for the continuation of our society. What happens when a society reverts to rampant disregard for themselves and others is a destruction of freedom everywhere.

When we talk of education reform we do have a responsibility to our youth to entrust in them the ideals and principals along with the moral ethics that were the basis on which our whole society was founded on over 200 years ago. Integrated with the technology coinciding with a lifestyle that encourages a passion for the arts, athletics, and academics is essential for a balanced society to flourish and prosper. That is education reform. To accomplish this it takes a whole conceptual approach. From financial security we come away with food security, With food security of our nations youth equals more economic opportunity for our future. And, the only way to achieve this is through passage and implementation of National Economic Reforms Ten Articles of Confederation.