#especially when they aren't treated as rumours but as fact

[bidamonalbarn]

Wait whats going on? Who is making up what about which celebrity?

dw it's just swiftie drama - one of my (ex) mutuals was mass posting bout how joe alwyn cheated & abused taylor (which is not even slightly proven - these allegations are from fans, not anyone close to taylor)

[fuyuu-chan]

Hi bestie! You told me to drop in so here I am. I'm gonna leave a request while I'm at it hehe Hope you don't mind.

Can I request a Neuvillette fic inspired by Taylor Swift's "Anti-Hero"? I particularly like the lyrics "Hi, it's me. I'm the problem, it's me. At teatime, everybody agrees." It gives me the vibes of a reader who is shunned by society, y'know? Perfect for some angst if I do say so myself 🫣🫢

Anyways, do whatever fits your vibe. I just love the way you write our dear Iudex 🥰 No pressure though! If it's too much, then just consider this as me dropping in to say hello to you and your lovely readers. Have a good day!!!

Love,

Mayaree

It's me. Hi. I'm the problem it's me :)

Fuyuu-chan: Hiiiii beshy hahahaha thanks for dropping in lol 😆🫶 also for being the first to request 😚

Pairing: Neuvillette x Reader

Summary: Everyone doesn't like you and thinks that you're not worthy for Neuvillette, and so they make fun of you, some even ignored you. By the way people in Fontaine treat you it makes you feel insecure and question your relationship with him.

Warning: Mention of break up, a bit of yandere ish at the end?? It might not look like it for some of y'all but just in caseee hehehehe (Not Proofread)

✧⁠◝⁠(⁠⁰⁠▿⁠⁰⁠)⁠◜⁠✧

The moment everyone in Fontaine knew about your relationship with Neuvillette would probably the worst thing that happened in your life, because of what people think about you, for not being worthy as the Ludex beloved partner.

And the worst part is that Neuvillette didn't know about any of this, they only talk about it when you're the only one around, when you're not with him. You consider to tell it to him but of course you don't want to bother him, especially since he's busy with his duties as the Chief of Justice.

Now, you got invited to one tea party held by one lady that has been "kind" to you, so of course you accepted it... 'I shouldn't had my hopes up, of course she is gonna be like the others' you thought. Who would've thought that she would be like that? She appeared to be kind to you the first time you met but when with everyone, with her friends and some other ladies, she had just embarrassed you.

She told everyone that (name) is just a common girl, basic, and compared to Neuvillette she's not on his level. She even told everyone that "She's just a problem to our dear Ludex, only a burden for him" she chuckles and everyone at that tea party laughed agreeing to what she said.

Feeling embarrassed, angered, saddened, you just excused yourself saying you'll go to the restroom but after you left you never came back but one thing's for sure, everyone hated you, talked behind your back while laughing. You can't handle it anymore, everyone is insulting you and the fact that you may be ruining Neuvillette's reputation, you feel furious but at the same time what can you do? I mean they're all right aren't they? You're just a problem.

Because of everyone saying things about you, spreading rumours around Fontaine, it's hard for you to go outside because once you do people would look at you and whisper to each other.

Some even threatened you, saying you should stay away from Neuvillette or you'll regret it. You thought it's probably just his admirers that's going way too far, but to be honest it's already affecting your mental health.

Well you did distance yourself from him, like when he ask you out like go to dinner, or have some date you would decline saying you have something to do or you're currently busy. But let's be honest you really wanted to spend time with him. He was at first: "It's alright, next time we could go." But as time pass he was getting worried and confused as to why you were not seeing him anymore.

Always rejecting him. 'What happened?' He thought. You two aren't like this in the past, you two would even date every time there's a free time like after work or weekends. But why are you distancing yourself from him?

This thoughts always bother Neuvillette and the way you act. And now he found himself walking towards your house to talk to you and ask you.

Once he arrives, he knocked on your door. It took you minute to open the door which definitely isn't like you at all since you always open the door immediately when it comes to him (he have like a pattern when he knocks at your door so you know it's him).

You were about to ask him but he just got in your house and closed the door. Now you two are just standing looking at each other, the air seems tense.

"...so uhhh...why did you come here?" You said finally breaking the silence.

"Am I not allowed to come here anymore?" He asked.

"That's not what I meant, what I mean is what's the reason for your sudden visit here?" You clarified.

"It's about you...us...why are you distancing yourself from me? What happened?" He asked.

"What do you mean?... I'm just busy that's why I can't really spend time with you..." You trail off hesitating.

"Don't lie (name)..." He said as he looked at you worried.

"Did I do something wrong that makes you distance yourself from me? If I did I'm sorry... but please tell me so I can fix it." Neuvillette asked as he looked at you in the eyes.

"You?.." you asked as you scoffed a bit. "No it's... it's me Neuvillette, I'm the problem..." You continued as you try not to tear up in front of him.

You can see how Neuvillette's furrow his eyebrows as he heard you speak.

"What? You're not the problem (name), what are you talking about?" He asked as he stepped closer to you.

"So you still don't know?" You asked.

"What do you mean?" He looked at you confused on what you mean.

"People in Fontaine don't like me, they hate me the moment they knew about us, they said I'm not worthy...for you... I'm just a problem...and a burden for you" you said as your voice is starting to break, you didn't even notice that you were now crying remembering everyone's word, insults, threats.

Neuvillette was speechless the moment those words left your mouth. How could he not know about any of this? Did all of the people hurt you like this everyday? He thought that everything was alright but it turns out it's not, how could he let this things happen to you?

Neuvillette wanted to comfort you but when he was about to approach you, you step back and said "I think we should... separate ways, I don't want you to get ruined or people thinking bad things about you because of me" you said as you try to look at him.

He stood there, frozen in his place. He was processing your words inside his head. "W-what?..." He finally get to asked after a few minutes.

"We should break up" you said.

"...But why?"

"Because of me...I was causing you problems, I might ruin your reputation in the future and I don't want that" you answered as you finally looked at him teary eyed.

Neuvillette then approached you as he pulls you closer to him, he held you in his arms. "(Name) please...I don't want to break up with you...Besides you're never a problem, people is just jealous of you and that's why they did that. Besides you will never ruin my reputation because when you came into my life, you taught me how to understand people, how to be considerate and many more. My reputation became much better with you."

You lean on him while you tear up, even if you don't want to but his warmth that enveloped you, you missed it.

"B-but.." you stutter.

"Sshh..." He hummed as he pat your back in order to comfort you just like what you did when he was crying. "I'm sorry I didn't know any of this, I'm sorry you have to go through all of that alone, I'm sorry that I turned a blind eye...and I'm sorry that I'm not there when you needed me the most." He apologized.

After you calmed down you replied to him. "...It's not your fault...so don't apologize" you sniffled as you finally looked at him for him to only wipe your tears away. "No love...it's my fault too for not knowing any of this, for not seeing how much you suffer everyday."

You kept silent as you just let him comfort you. Eventually you found yourself apologizing "I'm...sorry Neuvi...for saying we should break...up".

Neuvillette only shake his head "Its alright... I know you dont mean it, you might had said it but at that moment I can see in your eyes that you do not mean those words" he said as he smiled gently at you. "But...I hope to not hear those words again...I must say my heart ache when those words left your mouth." He continued as he looked a bit sad.

"I'm..sorry, its just that...that was the one I thought would be better for us..for you" you said as you looked down only for Neuvillette to grab your chin gently to make you look at him.

"Its alright...you dont mean that anyways right?" He asked and you nod and that was enough for him to smile again. "It's those people that made you think that...I cannot believe they had the audacity to say those vile things to my beloved, to my partner, who I love dearly from the bottom of my heart. I serve them for so many decades, I protected them yet they return all those things I did with this?" he said as he tucked your loose hair behind your ear. "They didn't even repsect the person I chose to be with me forever" he looked so mad that he let these things happen but you hugged him to calm him down a bit.

"What are you gonna do?" You asked while you lean onto his chest, he reciprocated your hug as he wrapped his arms around you waist.

"Don't worry love...I will handle it all...you just rest here and relax while I fix these, alright?" Neuvillette said as he rubbed your back. "It would also be nice if we could leave Fontaine for a few days to have your mind forget this for a while, don't you think?" He asked as he looked at you.

You hummed and nod. "I guess that would help...but how about your work?" You asked as you now looked at him to meet his gaze on you.

"I'll take a few days off, I'm pretty sure the others could handle the court for a while. Especially since there's no big cases as of now." He explained and that's enough for you to relax a bit.

You finally smiled and that made Neuvillette happy, seeing you smile again made his heart finally calm down and his mind to finally rest. For now he let himself relax on your warm embrace and for later...he would deal with those people that dare hurt his beloved (name).

ฅ⁠^⁠•⁠ﻌ⁠•⁠^⁠ฅ

Please do not copy, translate, repost to any other social media, Thank you.

[asexy-phoenix]

The Blue Castle chapter 11

I love this chapter so much! It's peak comedy, excellent characterization, and it's where I knew this book would be really good the first time I read it!

Uncle James thought the conversation was sagging to a rather low plane of personal gossip. He tried to elevate it by starting an abstract discussion on “the greatest happiness.” Everybody was asked to state his or her idea of “the greatest happiness.”

I do not like Uncle James. He's exactly the sort of sanctimonious know-it-all that the Stirlings are supposed to be. And also this control of the room? Asking everyone (in a way you can't really say no to) to give an opinion? No thank you.

“The greatest happiness,” said Valancy suddenly and distinctly, “is to sneeze when you want to.”

And then Valancy! I love how in one fell swoop she not only takes the wind out of Uncle James' sails and derails the conversation, she also provides some perspective on how snobby and self-righteous everyone else at the table is. It's amazing

The rest of the dinner party is also amazing. I wish this book was adapted into a movie just for this scene. It's so comedic in the best way. Montgomery has spent 10 chapters hammering home just what unbearably pretentious people the Stirling family is just to have Valancy deflate all of the in the course of a single dinner party.

“Oh, but you know we’re all dead,” said Valancy, “the whole Stirling clan. Some of us are buried and some aren’t—yet. That is the only difference.”

The black humour in this line! It reads like a straight insult but for Valancy it's a bittersweet truth - the only reason she's allowing herself this freedom is because she's a dead woman walking.

Eventually somebody did mention Barney Snaith at every Stirling function, Valancy reflected.

Of course they do, because they're the sort of people to always talk around and about the people they don't think are Good Enough for their town.

And all their talking points about Barney read exactly like all the arguments people use about those they don't like in order to other them: "I don't need proof because he's suspicious", "his name is enough reason to dislike him", and "no one would be saying such things if they weren't true."

That last one is especially ironic because the Stirlings themselves are the ones spreading these rumours! We never see anyone else in Deerwood think very badly of him, and Abel and Cissy think the world of him. Maybe how Barney is or is not treated by the non-Stirling inhabitants of Deerwood should be its own post...

Uncle Wellington’s rather lame conclusion was due to a marital glance from Aunt Wellington reminding him of what he had almost forgotten—that there were girls at the table.

Keeping in mind here that the "girls" in question are Olive and Valancy, two women in their late twenties. It really goes to show just how much single women aren't valued in this society, even by their families.

But her excitement had been too much for her. She knew, by certain unmistakable warnings, that one of her attacks of pain was coming on. It must not find her there. She rose from her chair.

Such a relatable moment! Valancy knows there's something wrong, but to show it in front of people she knows won't care or do anything to help her except for their own sake is something she won't tolerate. It's such a painful feeling, but a very relatable one for anyone with unsupportive families

The fact that Uncle Benjamin thinks an actual funny joke is something never before seen in the Stirling side of the family is an amazing little joke and goes very far towards painting a picture of these people.

And the ending is masterful. It ends with such a nice little flourish. Truly a masterpiece of a chapter and one I want to see if this is ever adapted again.

[anarmorofwords]

Hi! You're probably not going to like this ask, but before getting into it I'd just like to say that this isn't meant as Kamala hate or anything, and I don't really want to offend.

Having said that, wouldn't it make sense that we get to see how Kamala treated Anna after she came out? It's in all likelihood one of the things that's weighing on Anna the most.

Obviously Kamala had her valid reasons: her parents aren't as liberal as the Lightwoods, she believes (knows?) their love is conditional as she's adopted, she's not white and not being heterosexual could further any treatment she's suffered from being different... Her reasons have already been listed multiple times by multiple people. Kamala has the right to stay in the closet and fear coming out. And while that shouldn't be villianised, we can't forget that closeted people can harm those around them.

If Kamala had kept treating Anna like a good friend, rumour would've sparked, and even if it was denied, she'd have been harmed by merely associating with Anna. Especially with the life Anna began leading; she could have been labelled as one of Anna's 'conquests' by the Clave. That, as we've established, is detrimental for her safety.

But at the same time, it would create a breach between Anna and Kamala. And Anna had the right to be hurt by it and weary of it when Kamala said she wanted a relationship.

If we look at it from that perspective, Anna's actions (though inexcusable in how they treated Kamala --who was also at fault for not accepting a negative for four months) make sense. Kamala wasn't only a fling of a week*, but also the girl she lost her virginity with, who asked her to be her secret (until she married Charles, after which Anna's affections would be discarded), who hid her sexuality for two years and sat back while Anna suffered from homophobic commentary, and who now wants a relationship hidden from most of the people that know her.

Kamala shouldn't be forced to come out; but the harm that can do to the women she may engage with is reflective of what happens nowadays. I can mostly think of examples with gay men, so my apologies in advance. But how many women have seen their marriages ruined by their husband having affairs with men?

Creating characters that reflect a toxic part of the 'hidden' LGBT community shouldn't be seen as hating or villinifying. Thomas isn't out and he isn't labelled a villain by the narrative --because his actions don't harm anyone. The hate Alastair gets in-universe is because of his past as a bully, not because he's gay. Matthew's not fully out and he isn't villianised --like Thomas, because the decisions he makes to keep his sexuality hidden don't impact anyone negatively.

I'll even go as far as saying that not even the narrative villianises characters like Kamala and Charles. If it were, they'd be seen more like Grace in Chain of Gold. We'd see how Kamala's actions are affecting Anna's in more ways than anger (that in itself put the fandom against Anna), and the characters would note so. We wouldn't see scenes were Cordelia empathised with Charles, nor Matthew said he loved him.

Be it as it may, Kamala and Charles represent ugly parts of being closeted that can naturally occur when someone is in their position. LGBT people are human. Humans, when put into very difficult situations (and Charles risks his career; Kamala her safety), can make decisions that harm those around them. Consequently, the people they're harming have a right to feel, well, harmed in whatever range of ways --this goes mostly for Alastair, and very partly for Anna, whose treatment of Kamala was horrible.

Readers need to understand what is pushing these 'villianised' characters to harm (again, mostly for Alastair) the more prominent characters and go beyond how they are instantly depicted. Because these are complex characters based on complex real people influenced by very ugly realities we will move on from someday, but sadly not yet.

By the way, Charles and Kamala's situations aren't that similar beyond the closeted thing, but I crammed them together because of a post I saw you reblog.

Please understand I'm not justifying Charles's actions; that I understand the pain he's put Alastair through, and know that he shouldn't ever be near Alastair. Nor am I trying to justify Anna's actions nor hate on Kamala.

I'll just finish my pointless rant by adding that I do think cc has sensitivity readers. I think she asked a gay man to go through tec (I don't know if he still revised her other books, though), and know she asked POC's input when writing someone for their culture. I don't know much beyond that, but I doubt who revises her stuff is up to her. Wouldn't that be something the publisher is responsible for (honest question)?

*I've also noticed people using the argument that they didn't know each other long enough for Anna to harbour such ugly emotions towards Kamala, but Kamala also remembered Anna pretty deeply and is 'in love' with her. I just wanted to say that considering cc writes (fantastical) romance where someone can ask a woman they met two months ago marriage, stressing over time spaces doesn't make much sense. Just my take.

hi!!

alright, where do I start? probably would be best with stating that while I can analyse Kamala's situation with what I know/see/read about racism and discrimination and reasonably apply things I've read/heard from PoC to the discussion, as well as try to be as sensitive about it as possible, I'm still a white woman, so not a person that's best qualified to talk about this.

that being said - if someone wants to add something to this conversation, you're obviously more than welcome to, and if there's something in my answer that you don't agree with or find in some way insensitive or offensive - please don't hesitate to call me out on that.

back to your points though: (this turned into a whole ass essay, so under the cut)

I don't think Anna shouldn't be able to reminiscent on Kamala's behaviour/reaction to her coming out, or be hurt by it. what bothers me is the way CC talks about it - I can't remember the exact phrasing, but the post where she mentioned this suggested something along the lines of "you'll see how Kamala sided with the Clave and didn't defend Anna after her coming out", therefore putting the blame on Kamala and completely disregarding the fact that Kamala wasn't in position to do much at all. It suggest that their situation was "poor Anna being mistreated by Kamala". therefore I'm afraid Kamanna's main problem/conflict will remain to be portrayed as "Anna having to allow themselves to love again and forgive Kamala", while Anna's shortcomings - and Kamala's vulnerable position - are never discussed. I think it would be possible to acknowledge both Kamala's difficult situation and the possible hurt her behaviour caused Anna without being insensitive towards Kamala's character, but it would take a really skilled - and caring - author to do both of the perspectives justice. CC would have to find a balance between being aware of the racism/prejudice Kamala faced/ writing her with lots of awareness and empathy, and still allowing her to make mistakes and acknowledging them. As it is however, I'm under impression that she's just treating it as a plot device, a relationship drama.

I'd say no one expects characters of color to be written as flawless or never making mistakes, it's mostly the way these mistakes are written and what things these characters are judged/shamed/

And that's - at least in my understanding and opinion - where the problem is. it's that the narrative never even addresses Anna's faults, and portrays Kamala as the one that caused all - or most of - the pain, without ever even acknowledging her problems and background.

White characters in TLH make mistakes and fuck up - because they're human and they're absolutely allowed to - but the thing is, non-white characters aren't afforded that privilege. Anna's behaviour is never questioned - none of it, shaming Kamala for not being able to come out, dismissing her desire to be a mother, or any of the questionable things she did in ChoI. Same with Matthew, James, Thomas. Alastair and Kamala however? they're constantly viewed through their past mistakes, and forced to apologize for them over and over, forced to almost beg for forgiveness. Moreover, those past mistakes are used as a justification of all and any shitty behaviour the other characters exhibit towards them now, which is simply unfair and cruel. They're held to a much higher standard.

So I'd like to say that yes, Kamala was in the wrong to keep nagging Anna after numerous rejections, and she was in the wrong to not inform Anna about Charles prior to them having sex - but that doesn't give Anna a free pass to constantly mistreat Kamala. And let's be real, Anna isn't stupid - while at 17 she could be naive and uninformed, I can't imagine how after years of hanging out with the Downworlders and numerous affairs and being out and judged by the Clave she's still so ignorant about Kamala's situation. I definitely think she's allowed to be hurt, but to still not understand why Kamala did what she did? Anna isn't blaming her for not telling her about Charles earlier - which would be fair - but instead for refusing to engage in an outright romance with her. She's being ignorant - and consciously so, I think.

Overall, I think you're definitely right about how coming out - or staying closeted - can be messy and hurt people in the process, especially in unaccepting environments/time periods, and I've seen enough discourse online to know there will never be a verdict/stance on this that will satisfy everyone. I, for one, would really like to refrain from putting all the blame on a single person - but, at least the way I see it, CC is pointing fingers. maybe not directly, but she is. Kamala, Alastair and Charles have no friends or support systems, and the only people in the narrative that defend them are themselves (ok, Cordelia does defend Alastair from Charles, but not from shitty takes about him and his "sins"). Also, sorry, but I don't like how you say "hid her sexuality for two years and sat back while Anna experienced homophobic comments" - it sounds very much judgemental. Kamala had every right to do that? The fact that she slept with Anna doesn't means she owed her something, and certainly not coming out and most probably destroying her life, or even defending her at the - again - expense of her own reputation, or more possibly safety.

As for Charles - it's a different issue here, at least imo - I fear that it'll be implied that his refusing to come out will is his main "sin", and therefore not something he can be judged for, which ironically, will be villainizing, but mostly will mean his actual sins are dismissed. This is where the scene with Cordelia feeling a pang of sympathy for him comes into play, and it worries me. I've never hated Charles for not wanting to come out, but rather for, let's see - grooming Alastair, disregarding Alastair's needs and feelings, disrespecting his mother, being a sexist prick, being low-key far-right coded "make Shadowhunters great again" etc.

As for sensitivity readers - I'm no expert, so I don't think my input is worth much. From what I've gathered from multiple threads/discussions on twitter, tho it is probably consulted/approved by the publisher, many authors push for that - and authors less famous and "powerful" than her. I'm not a hater, but seeing fandoms' opinions on much of her rep, I think she could do better. Because if she does have sensitivity readers, then they don't seem to be doing a great job - maybe they're friends who don't wanna hurt her feelings? Or maybe she thinks a gay guy's feedback will be enough for any queer content - which, judging by the opinions I've seen from the fans, doesn't seem to be true.

Again, these are mostly my thoughts and I'm more than open to reading other opinions, because *sigh* I really don't know how to handle this.

Bottom line - I really really don't want to be hating on the characters in general, playing God in regards to judging the struggles of minorities, or even criticising the characters too harshly for being human, flawed etc. What my main issue is is how CC handles those complex and heavy topics.

I hope I make sense and this answer satisfies you somehow - I also hope someone better equipped to answer might wanna join this conversation.

* I desperately need a reread of TLH before I engage in any more conversations like this, but I didn't wanna leave you hanging. So yeah, I might be remembering things wrong. Again, let me know, I'm very much open to being corrected as well as to further discussion.

* I use she/her pronouns for Anna because that's what she uses in canon

[yanderecandystore]

🥺🥺🥺🥺 OHMYGODTHANKYOU!!

I'm glad my writing makes you happy!

Sorry for making you wait! And also, sorry if it isn't what you expected (cause I'm st00pid)

I think we might be able to see this new wealthy student some other time.

Trusting [Yandere bully - Headcanons]

Since you started studying in this school, you noticed how so many students here are actually really wealthy.

Some people were nice to you, some people didn't care about you being poor.

If it wasn't for the twins, you would actually make a lot of friends. That's the sad part.

You hate the fact that people are afraid of talking to you, but you can't fully blame them. If they did, they would be tormented as well, especially if they were poor like you.

Actually, for some reason the people that used to talk with you that had the same condition as you, suddenly decided to change schools.

You didn't hear anything from them anymore.

But anyway, you were in the school's library trying to find an book for your next school project. Your teacher had given some copies in class, but there were only a few that she had picked up, and you ended up being without one.

She said you should ask someone to share a book with you and make a project in group, but no one wanted to make this project with you. Only the twins. You aren't accepting their offer.

You find a copy of the book that you needed, but, it's too high on the shelve for you.

You struggle to reach it, when someone else grabs it. A student you haven't met before, he is a bit taller than you.

He said he wanted to read this book as is one of his favorites, and that was the last copy that the school library had, so you tell him you needed for an school project.

He looked a bit sad, but he seemed to understand that you needed it more than him, awwn poor guy, you felt a little bad about this but he seemed to not mind as much as you.

He, actually wasn't bothered about being close and talking to you. Should you do something? Should you say something?

"- . . . So, uhn, do you like reading?" You were trying to start an conversation as best as you could. You were a little desperate to meet new people, to talk to someone who isn't always belittling you.

He says that yes, he enjoys reading, he doesn't have an specific genre that he likes, well, maybe novel, but yeah, he enjoys reading pretty much anything.

You start to say your tastes, even if you aren't an bookworm yourself, you enjoy an good book from time to time.

This is going so well, you think. He seems to like talking with you with is really good! This is the best conversation that you had in a long time.

You start switching subjects, finding little things in familiar. He seems to be a nerdy boy, but also he loves animals so much, he has a chinchilla!

You want to celebrate this moment, it feels amazing to talk with this guy!

You part your ways, the student leaves you to go to the third year classes. Well, he is an really nice person! And a bit cute in a way.

You find yourself rethink about him and your silly little talk, gosh, you actually feel happy for talking with him.

Well, he is thinking the same.

He had heard about you, the twins plaything, to torment, to bully. He should have known better to never hear some random gossip, but he heard the rumours about you and the twins Coldwell. Everyone heard about it.

He planned on never talking to you, never saying anything about your name, as precaution for his on safety. He didn't need the twins to start targeting him again. It seems that everyone that talks with you, is doomed.

But.

You were really nice. He saw you on the library, thinking that, if the twins aren't close, he could see for himself what type of person you were. He didn't want to read that book, he already had an copy of it, he just thought it would help him get closer to you.

It's funny when thinks of it, he always tried to avoid you at all costs, so he wouldn't be harmed. But somehow, he was always there, looking at a distance, seeing them treat you like an toy, with he hated it. He somehow, was always looking out to see if you were there, getting closer.

Thinking about you and twins every now and then since you were the school's main gossip. But thinking about you every second.

He feels so dumb now, avoiding you like an decease, but somehow, obsessively thinking about you. Thinking about if he should talk to you at least once, if he should interfere in the bullying at least once.

It was tempting, you were always trying to be close to people, but people avoided you. Sometimes you looked so sad.

He doesn't want you to be all alone like this, he know deep down, how it hurts to be all by yourself.

He thinks you're kinda cute, maybe it was the way you were struggling to get the book or just your little ways of expressing yourself.

He wants to get to know you better. Maybe you'll want to know him too?

Rumours around this school, spread like oxygene through the air.

A pretty boy was seen walking around with you. An third year. Walking around and talking with you.

Some say they saw him grabbing the book for you, some say they saw him patting your head, some say they saw you holding hands. Some say you were flirting with him, some say that you were offering him something, some say that they saw you two going out after school.

Basically, the truth mixes with lies and misinterpretetions of what really happened.

And basically, the twins are pissed.

"- WHAT??!"

Both can tell that there are some lies mixed in this rumours, after all, they know you wouldn't do such a thing.

You wouldn't just, go out with someone you just met, or, hold hands with them, right? It doesn't sound like an you-thing-to-do.

They're so afraid that those rumours might be true though. What if you were that easy? What if he likes you? What if you like him too? What if you have know him for a long time, and you were seeing each other, and you were happly dating in secret and-

Thinking about all possibilities, asking who saw and who knows exactly what happened.

No one seems to be telling the full story. This isn't going well.

The best option is to see for themselves. They could ask you, sure, but what guarantees that you wouldn't lie? You probably have been lying all this time to them.

Acting all shy to them, but probably being completely different on the inside.

They find you, sitting alone at lunchtime, God they wish they could just come in and take you away! But they need to see if this "pretty boy" appear.

Someone is coming close to you.

Oh, they know that guy! He was an close friend to them, until, he started being an wuss and decided to quit. Saying they were taking it "too far", that they were acting like kids.

"- Asshole."

They don't mind seeing him around school, they actually don't care about him. But seeing you be this, happy, close to someone else hurts them.

You two look like an couple, neither of them like this. Although being calm most of the time, the thought of loosing you to this guy makes Adrien want to cry on the spot.

And Alexandra is just having trouble keep it together. She is sad but also so angry at what she is seeing.

You look like your normal self, the one before the bullying started. Happy and excited about the little things in life. They never understood why you were like that.

They wanted to see that again.

And that asshole is just mocking them at this point, he looks like he is enjoying this a little too much. Getting too close to you.

They didn't know what to do! They can't loose you to this prick! They think for a while, until:

"- Oh . . . I think I have an idea . . ."

You were talking to your new friend, it was nice to eat lunch with company.

But you could see both twins coming closer, it seems like you can't take a break for one day.

"- Greetings sweetheart! We were looking for you!!" Alexandra says, she is ready to just grab you and run away but, they have a better plan in mind.

"- You never showed up, why did you leave us waiting?" Adrien asks you-and oh, yeah! You were supposed to go meet them in their favorite spot, but since they didn't say anything to you personally you didn't remember.

You normally go just so things don't get complicated. Not because you want to.

"- We see you already met our friend here, isn't he a cutie? We were wondering, what sweet lies have he feed you?"

. . .

"- . . . What? What do you mean?" You start to panic a little, please, they can't be telling the truth. Is an trick, right?

"- Your new boyfriend here and us are besties since childhood! We used to be playing around and planning our next big prank on little pests like you."

"- You want to know our best prank ever?"

"- Oh please, [Y/N] don't listen to-" Alexandra shushes him with her hand, a little too aggressively. That could count as an slap.

"- Sshh- Our best prank was making an pathetic student, that got lovestruck by our little charming prince over here, understand the cruel reality that they weren't in the same level!"

"- Do you remember their faces? When they started crying after you harshly rejected them? When told them you were so far above their reach?"

"- I-I'm not like that anymore!" He says, saying it more towards you than towards your bullies.

"- If I were you, I would be careful [Y/N]~"

"- You never know when he'll strike-"

"- S-Shut UP! How can I trust what you're saying, if all you have done was try to make my life miserable?!!" You yell at them, you can't hold it anymore, this hurts way too much!

"- . . . Well, we have never lied to you, have we?"

"- We have only ever told you the truth, you're beneath people like us, you're beneath people like him! An pathetic loser that needs to know their little place" They say as they start to go away.

"- Whenever he breaks your silly little heart, don't be surprised."

. . .

They're gone now.

God, you know you shouldn't listen to them, but can you trust someone you just met?

You start to cry a bit.

"- [Y/N], I'm sorry, I probably should have told you sooner. But please, I swear I'm not like that anymore! I feel terrible about it, and if I could I would-"

"- It's fine! You don't need to say anything now, I just, really need some time alone." You tell him, you need a little bit of space now.

He hesitates, but decided to go away and leave you alone for a bit.

The twins can't simply force the principal to expel him, can't just pick up a fight with him, can't blackmail him, but they can sure make you question your new friend's relationship with the twins.

You feel worst now, it feels like you can't trust anyone.

You'll probably talk to him later, but, you need some time alone.

He feels terrible for what he has done in the past, and feels even worse for not telling you sooner.

But he swears that he is going to make it up for you, somehow . . .

And both twins swear to bring up all of their fun times with this student, if it means making you go away from him.

"- When he breaks your heart, we'll be here waiting for you with open arms :)!"

[onlyeverydaysa]

3. Africa and the novel coronavirus.

Africa enjoyed a short bit of time before the novel coronavirus hit its shores. Here, however; the amount of time that lapsed till the first few reported confirmed cases made the world question whether or not we would be ready to handle a health crisis of this magnitude. Kind of ironic because the entire world including first world countries were and are still not equipped to handle a pandemic of this magnitude as we can clearly see from the numbers and how different areas have shifted to become the epicentre. But I digress. 

The first known and confirmed cases in Africa originated from Egypt, and was said to be someone who was not of Egyption nationality who had recently travelled to an area affected by COVID-19 and was reported on the 14th of February, 2020. The last African country to catch COVID19  was Lesotho who recorded their first case on the 13th of May, 2020. 

Then on the 5th of March, 2020 the first known and confirmed case was recorded / reported to South Africa. South Africa was ‘the 7th African country to  have a citizen test positive for the disease’. The person was said to be a 38 year old male who had travelled to Italy with his wife in a group of 10 people. Here, South Africa was held to be ‘one of 2 countries on the continent with reliable testing capabilities’. But testing capacity has since improved in other countries due to the rapid spread and severity of coronavirus and the need to  be able to take care of our people. Here, the rand was said to weaken against the dollar after confirmation of our first corona case. 

We watched the novel coronavirus spread rapidly across Africa in quite a short period of time. It almost looked, well, too co-ordinated. Was that just coincidence? I don’t know but again this takes me back to whichever theory you believe in about it’s origins; as that theory might have an answer that suits you. -sips tea- However, one must also take into consideration how much travelling was still allowed during the earlier days of COVID19 and how in general, mild cases have been allowed, in most cases to treat themselves at home - which means the potential for underreporting of real COVID19 cases  throughout the world; whilst some non-COVID cases have been misdiagnosed as covid cases potentially inflating numbers in some areas will cause problems for us when analysing what needed to be done, what has been done and what still needs to be done to fight COVID19. 

But here is what we do know: every country’s experience of coronavirus is different and as a result everyone has had to respond differently to try address the unique challenges facing their country. The one size fits all approach couldn’t be used to treat this virus, as it has been used to treat other viruses and we are seeing in some instances this difference in approach paying off in some countries whilst going wrong in others which has been both eye opening and scary as the entire world realises that the entire health system has been greatly neglected. 

However, despite having been praised for trying to get ahead of the curve by WHO and many others (and also praising WHO for their role in helping to combat COVID19) in our earlier days dealing with coronavirus, our numbers have since drastically shot up (currently sitting at about 23 615 as of the 25th of May, 2020 - Africa Day) and are expected to peak only around August / September/ Also, despite efforts by government to keep people calm and despite efforts by everyone to try and focus on the facts and the science of it all there have been some later decisions that have arguably taken us backward or caused us as citizens to question whose interests are best being served by some of the implementation measures introduced by government to combat / curve / reduce the spread of COVID-19. 

But with regards to my experience in South Africa, I would definitely say we tried to do the best we could with the cards that we have been dealt and as critical as I am of politicians, authority and structures I would say that some of the decisions that have been taken have been quite impressive actually, despite potential political, racial and class differences that the country is facing. Also I am very proud of our healthcare sector and how they have managed to actually also encourage us to stay calm by leading by example from our Health Minister, to doctors, nurses, lab techs, scientists, pharmacists, paramedics and other essential staff that work at the health facilities including cleaning staff, security, food suppliers etc. Everyone has just been calm in the public eye. Our response between mid-march up until early April definitely inspired a sense of feeling safe (health wise), albeit not physically; because the army & the police were unleashed on the people causing greater distress.

Some controversial issues raised were in relation to class and how lockdown impacted on the unemployed, underprivileged and working class in a society that is so deeply unequal - actually even known as the most unequal country in the world. Social media has opened the door for all these different debates, with many people openly questioning and criticizing some of the decisions taken by the government. Most notably, the open letters to the president written by Ntsiki Mazwai and Gareth Cliff which caused a stir. For which I will definitely say at the time Ntsiki raised some valid concerns even though her tone was harsh. Gareth’s letter stated nothing new, but then when he was questioned on it, on the popular South African tv show the Big Debate SA he didn’t really articulate himself well and quite frankly was quite rude and unfortunately played into critiques belief that he was clout chasing and seeking relevance (a story for another day). (This all depends on which side of the debate you fall on, I guess).

Meanwhile, round-about mid to late-April (21 April, 2020) Madagascar announced a herbal mix remedy called COVID Organics that is preventative and curative in nature. The remedy is said to contain Artemisia Annua, a plant used in medicines to combat malaria, for which it has been critiqued to say that this plant does not fight malaria in its plant-like state. Here, several African countries had opted to try it by mid-May, including: Liberia, Equitorial Guinea, Guinea Bissau, Tanzania, Central African Republic, the Democratic Republic of Congo, and the Republic of Congo who have all ‘received some bottles’ of COVID Organics. The emergence of this remedy sparked growing debate around the usefulness / effectiveness in herbal and traditional medicine in combating COVID19 here on the African continent even though China has been exploring this option since February. This resulted in WHO cautioning against herbal remedies that are untested but criticism for the centering of Western medicine as the solution has grown. This led to a call to boycott WHO on social media which never really went further and was then resolved when WHO was rumoured to have agreed to look into COVID Organics but concerns were raised around the non-disclosure clause said to be agreed upon between the two (also rumour, as the sources on this are now more scarce). However Madagascar is still a member of WHO and supporting WHO. Madagascar was recently elected (22 May) on their executive board. 

Personally, I believe a combination of both forms of medicine must be looked into, because some homemade remedies have proven effective in combating or helping to boost our immune systems against flu and if flu is a virus that logic holds. But on the other hand, noting that respiratory illnesses like pneumonia require antibiotics and other inflammatory and other drugs as well as liquids, rest, and possible oxygen therapy a more impactful drug with organic properties may be what is needed. But again I am not a medical expert so I am merely stating an opinion based on my understanding - its not fact. Anyway, interestingly enough: Madagascar only had 121 cases and no deaths at the time of releasing COVID Organics. Now by the 25th of May, 2020 they had 527 cases (I stand to be corrected). This is still significantly less than most countries especially for a population of 27.6 Million people so they must be doing something right even if it might not be linked to medicine - it could just be that they have disciplined citizens who are taking care of their health by eating healthy and practicing effective social distancing and sanitization.

To date, Africa as a whole continent has had 111 812 confirmed cases of COVID!9, with 3 354 deaths and 45 001 recoveries as of 6am, (25 May, 2020). In blog posts to follow, I will continue to touch on South Africa as my primary example of what is happening (for obvious reasons as you can tell by the name of this blog) and I will then try to give examples of what has been done in other countries. 

*Disclaimer (again): images aren't mine. I just use pics from the net from the sources I touch on, for my posts. 

*Wrote this piece on Africa Day, but struggled to post it. 

*A reminder that  the blog posts in the 21 Conversation series are just bits & pieces of the COVID19 experience that I have found worth talking about touching on some facts, some opinion and some theories you may or may not agree with, I have linked some of the sources that speak to these issues in all the posts that range from news to stats and facts to blogs to youtube so take everything with a pinch of salt. But always keep up to date with coronavirus news through reliable sources and keep up to date with your country’s rules, regulation and other legislation through official government sites.  I hope lockdown is treating you well if you are in lockdown and if you happen to be reading this and your country isn’t on lockdown let us know how your country is handling it. Stay safe everybody. 

M.T.M

Sources:

1. https://www.aljazeera.com/news/2020/02/egypt-confirms-coronavirus-case-africa-200214190840134.html

2. https://www.thesouthafrican.com/news/world-news/first-coronavirus-case-south-africa-who-is-it-where-reported/

3. https://techcentral.co.za/first-case-of-coronavirus-in-south-africa/96364/

4. https://edition.cnn.com/2020/03/05/africa/south-africa-first-coronavirus-case/index.html

5. https://www.cnbcafrica.com/news/2020/03/05/south-africa-confirms-first-case-of-covid-19/

6. https://www.iol.co.za/news/politics/coronavirus-in-sa-who-boss-praises-south-africas-response-to-covid-19-pandemic-45923836

7. https://www.cnbcafrica.com/news/2020/04/09/african-union-reaffirms-support-for-who-amid-covid-19-pandemic/

8. https://www.sabcnews.com/sabcnews/who-again-heaps-praise-on-south-africas-response-to-covid-19/

9. https://mg.co.za/article/2019-11-19-why-sa-is-the-worlds-most-unequal-society/ 

10. https://www.timeslive.co.za/news/south-africa/2018-04-04-poverty-shows-how-apartheid-legacy-endures-in-south-africa/

11. https://www.bbc.com/news/world-africa-52125713

12. https://businesstech.co.za/news/government/396473/handling-of-the-covid-19-crisis-makes-mkhize-a-stand-out-leader-analysts/

13. https://www.cnbcafrica.com/africa-press-office/2020/05/12/coronavirus-south-africa-employment-and-labour-praised-for-prompt-payment-of-coronavirus-covid-19-temporary-employer-employee-relief-scheme-ters-benefits/

14.https://select.timeslive.co.za/news/2020-03-23-sa-states-response-to-covid-19-gets-a-huge-thumbs-up/

15. https://www.bbc.com/news/world-africa-52619308

16. https://businesstech.co.za/news/government/395685/extending-lockdown-would-not-delay-south-africas-coronavirus-peak-by-much-mkhize/

17. https://citizen.co.za/lifestyle/your-life-entertainment-your-life/entertainment-celebrities/2261937/ntsiki-mazwai-pens-scathing-open-letter-to-ramaphosa-opposes-lockdown/

18. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OFPD2zj6DCE&t=6s

19. https://www.garethcliff.com/dear-mr-president/

20. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n8iGnW2cSYc 

21. https://www.worldometers.info/world-population/madagascar-population/

22. https://www.reuters.com/article/us-health-coronavirus-madagascar-idUSKBN22K1HQ

23. https://www.msn.com/en-za/news/other/madagascar-launches-miracle-drink-for-coronavirus-infection/ar-BB12WZoM

24. https://africa.cgtn.com/2020/04/21/madagascar-president-backs-unproven-herbal-treatment-for-coronavirus/

25. https://www.aljazeera.com/news/2020/05/coronavirus-madagascar-herbal-remedy-covid-organics-200505131055598.html

26. https://www.bbc.com/news/world-africa-52374250

27. https://www.aa.com.tr/en/africa/who-to-study-madagascars-drug-to-treat-covid-19-/1840971#

28. https://africacheck.org/fbcheck/no-madagascar-hasnt-quit-world-health-organization/

29. https://www.africanews.com/2020/05/25/coronavirus-in-africa-breakdown-of-infected-virus-free-countries/

30. https://www.webmd.com/lung/understanding-pneumonia-treatment

31. https://www.drugs.com/condition/pneumonia.html