#every ninja has daddy issues even the ninja’s dads have daddy issues

[waterphoenix21]

And the winner of the Biggest Daddy Issues contest by a long shot is Lloyd Garmadon!

I can’t say I’m surprised. From being destined to fight him at such a young age to being forced to banish him to a cursed realm, only to have him resurrected in his worst, evilest form, most of Lloyd’s traumas are related to his father. He even almost beat Lloyd to death, declaring he has no son, attempted to kill his friends in a very gruesome way, and finally, replaced him with a potted plant. That’s messed up on so many levels.

But to tell you the truth, Mao Mao is the one who inspired me to make this poll. Shin Mao favored his older daughters and neglected his son all his life to the point he never even got his name or age right, but Mao Mao still looked up to him, giving him unconditional love and unquestioned respect. I think the last part is what truly makes it tragic. Shin Mao doesn’t treat Mao Mao half as badly as Garmadon treated Lloyd and is described as passive-aggressive, rather than downright abusive. Yet it amazes me how many episodes focus on the long-lasting psychological effects that Shin’s treatment had on Mao. Mao Mao’s self-esteem is extremely fragile and inconsistent to the point where he’s either egotistical or self-depreciative with almost nothing in between, and there are a lot of suppressed fears, insecurities, emotions, and desires that constantly bubble up and affect Mao and everyone else around him.

Despite all this, he still tries to be the best father figure for his little apprentice, encouraging her dream and reassuring her of her own fears and insecurities.

While Lloyd’s past with his dad is the most scarring, he rarely shows those scars, unlike Mao whose entire personality and day-to-day struggles are based on it. Lloyd and his friends are often shown processing their traumas in their different ways (usually in the first episode of the season), but after a while, we return to the status quo and there are very few notable changes in the ninja’s personalities. Like, let’s wrap this up quickly, guys, there’s a new villain in town! This, to be fair, makes sense given the overarching story of Ninjago whereas Mao Mao’s more slice-of-life, over-the-top cartoon hijinks style allows for more moments in which the characters can breathe, get a good look at themselves, and address their personal issues. Mao Mao even goes to a therapist every Thursday, which is something we’ve all agreed for years that Lloyd desperately needs.

Monkie Kid is somewhere in between, having both a lot of lore, but also some more laid-back episodes, especially in the first seasons. Since unlike Lloyd and Mao, Red Son isn’t the main character, his relationship with the Demon Bull King doesn’t get as much spotlight, but it’s still pretty tragic when you think about it. Red Son waited for centuries after his father was imprisoned under a mountain, and the first thing the Bull King does after he returns is treat him like a henchman rather than a son. They do get noticeably better after a while though.

Anyway, thank you to everyone who voted!

I didn't expect so many people to be interested so I decided to turn this into a full Daddy Issues tournament. Feel free to check it out if you'd like.

[narhinafan]

Referencing to a recent post. I'd be so down for Sarada's being a single mother's daughter not knowing (and/or caring) who her father is. The single mother being some whole new character too, preferably, because come on now, Sasuke needed a fresh start and a clean slate with someone else. He already fked over pretty much every woman he encountered that they'd be living with some traumas Sak//ura doesn't count because she got her own problems being overly obsessed with some boy she fell in love with over his LOOKS and some rivalry pettiness.

I said single because it's pretty clear that Sasuke needed to work on himself first before focusing on being a father (and a husband!) and any half decent person would rather raise their child in a healthy environment than to deal with the baby daddy's issues and abandonments.

IMO, it'd be more compelling show watching Sasuke learning to be a dad without that disturbing and uncomfortable undertone of being forced to via Sa//kura's toxicity and other people's guilt tripping. I wanna watch him wanting to be a dad and being awkward about it than grudgingly doing so because "he had to".

I can go on on how the studio can do better, even with that dreaded ss, but I won't lol the above is personally how I'd have gone about it, esp considering his canon character. I do believe it is very possible he could be a good (or half decent) dad and being genuinely happy about being one, but the development has to make sense if the writer wanted a healthy relationship between Sasuke and Sarada (and his baby mama) in the first place.

I rambled enough, but yeah. Poor Sasuke wasn't ready to be a dad. Or be a husband at all.

Yeah Sarada also got the short end of the stick Sakura's obsession with Sasuke only put more pressure on Sarada and put her in danger.

Honestly Sasuke would have been better off healing before starting a family or finding someone that actually got to know him and he would spend more time with and let him relax and easy up.

I always thought Sasuke would have been awkward, but good dad with him returning a bit to what he was like before the massacre over time. You know melting the coldness of his that built up over the years.

Even if Sasuke didn't stick around I think the family should have gotten together every so often for peaceful family moments outside the village maybe not make it known about Sasuke being the Sasuke Uchiha till Sarada was older. Let her think her dad is just an average ninja that primarily handles outside the village work.

Plus they have the perfect set up for why with Sasuke's past and not wanting it too affect Sarada growing up as she is technically the daughter of a criminal plus they could talk and explain about his family without outright saying who they were and further give Sarada better motivation to be Hokage. She could have inherited Itachi's dream and remind Sasuke of his brother and truly open up a new era for the Uchiha clan.

Sasuke and Sarada could have been handled so much better if there wasn't pressure to have him end up with Sakura to achieve her goal of being with him.

[namelysane]

Ok, so i know that we already established that hellspawn hates harumi with a burning passion. But i need more than that.

How is their dynamic?

Does harumi still tries to "connect" with her only for her to retort with an impressive amount of sass for a 4yo? Does she think of how when all of this is over she will bash that brat's head into a wall?

Does hellspawn cling to her daddy's leg and give her death glares in every possible situations? Does she try to prevent any "romantic" moment/chemistry between the two?

And after harumi is revealed and the ritual "failed" is she going "I told you so" to literally everyone? Does she try to comfort lloyd saying stuff like; "you can't be sad because of her daddy thats what she want" or "there are far better possible mommies out there" or maybe even "im pretty sure she snores in her sleep anyway"

And lastly will there ever be a situation (maybe in s16?) That suddenly golden blond hair becomes long platinum braids, eye color becomes one she saw in the mirror every day, and even the scared look on her face became suddenly painfully familiar as harumi watched for mere few seconds as the green ninja's daughter image was replaced with her younger self

I have to say...that this is by far, my favorite ask from you.

I think Harumi would still try to connect with her, even though their dynamic is initially , 'seemingly nice princess tries every possible way to make a wary child as comfortable as possible in her presence' — I'm saving most of the sass for s16, when hellspawn's only sees this woman as a psycho.

But for s8, (at first) it's more like she's clinging to Lloyd's leg looking visibly uncomfortable. She knows that something is off, but she can't tell what. The ninja don't see anything wrong, and neither does Lloyd. Maybe she's shy. Or maybe the princess' makeup is scary. That's probably why she's acting like this.

Then in Dead Man's Squall, we get to see the death glares thing, which Lloyd reprimands her for when they're alone. The other ninja think it's cute because it just looks like she's jealous of the attention the princess is getting. And when Lloyd tries to stand beside Harumi in the control room, hellspawn reaches for his hand. She doesn't like it when her father and the Harumi are alone in the same room and FSM does something feel off.

But fortunately, after Dread on Arrival, Lloyd finally apologizes to her for dismissing her suspicions. We get to see some father-daughter comfort after that but it's mostly hellspawn doing the comforting because her dad just got himself some trust issues and a broken heart.

"And lastly, will there ever be a situation (maybe in s16?) That suddenly golden blonde hair becomes long platinum braids, eye color becomes one she saw in the mirror every day, and even the scared look on her face became suddenly painfully familiar as harumi watched for mere seconds as the green ninja's daughter image was replaced with her younger self."

YOUR MIND. OH DAMN, WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THAT

To answer that one, there should be. I hate Harumi's redemption arc in crystalized but it would be nice to see this lol — especially because, now that I think of it, hellspawn does look a lot like Harumi. Even though this woman's prepared to make this girl's dad's life a living hell and throttle his midget, I can see this happening. Maybe these two could get into a situation where Harumi has to choose whether to save this child or let her die. Or maybe the Overlord needs her for something — she was created with Lloyd's Golden Power, you know. Gosh, I love this. Thanks for the idea!

[cap10froggerguy]

Tenth Anniversary recap

So, as my little celebration of the Ninjago 10 Year Anniversary, here’s a little recap of every single season, including the pilots and a few bonuses. I also added totally arbitrary scoring based on my own preferences. Ready? Here we go!

The Pilots:

Local man joins gang to save sister, gains awesome powers and dragons along the way. Featuring the Wise Old Mentor(C) and Generic Evil Overlord(C), as well as FIYAH, the main character with a firey temper, AT-AT, blue guy with motor mouth, Frosty, local “real boy” who is super aloof, and Bucket of Rocks, who is the “leader” and has a personality like a rock. Is that a compliment? You decide!

Choppy animation and okay storytelling, but excellent characterization creates a surefire laugh fest!

0/0, they were trying their hardest, so no ranking for you.

Season 1: Rise of the Snakes

Ninja team angers young and bratty boy, who unleashes snake army. Prophecy threatens to tear the team apart at the seams with contests to prove who is better. Winner ends up being FIYAH’s sister, but instead of becoming The Chosen One(C), young and bratty boy (henceforth known as Green Angst) gets the title. 

Animation is slightly better, and the storytelling style leads to an okay season.

3/13, Room for improvement.

Season 2: Legacy of the Green Ninja

Green Angst gains superpowers, ages up, and beats up his dad, who has become possessed with evil. Plot of Return of the Jedi ensues, dad is good, and everything wraps up. 

Thinking this was going to be the last season, the showrunners pulled out all the stops, and it shows. Good job!

5/13, This makes a good ending.

SIKE

Season 3: Rebooted

Series tries to pick up where they left off. Unnecessary love triangles and robot battles ensue. Frosty dies, totally for realsies. 

The whole atmosphere feels a bit rushed, and about half of the story is there for unneeded drama.

1/13, did not age well.

Season 4: Tournament of Elements

In stunning turn of events, Frosty is not dead. Ninja must battle in hunger games in order for Colonel Sanders to release him. FIYAH develops a crush on his daughter. 

A fun season with quippy writing and tons of lore, it works really well!

8/13, this season ages wonderfully.

Season 5: Possession

Ghosts are a thing now! Green Angst gets possessed, and so the ninja must learn ghost fighting to fight ghosts. Also, FIYAH’s sister (From now on called Water Girl) gains water powers. 

While a neat story concept, the fact that Water Girl has only NOW been told about her powers kinda starts to weaken the story for me.

4/13, could do better.

...

...

Oh, and Bucket of Rocks is a ghost now. But the writers don’t care, so lets move on.

Season 6: Skybound

AT-AT gets a season, where he had to battle a genie pirate while Water Girl tries to be a Strong Independent Woman(C) despite the love triangle fiasco. Season ends up retconning itself out of existence. 

While a good season pre-redesign, some of the story choices cause it to feel a bit drawn out in hindsight.

6/13, a fun season concept.

Day of the Departed:

Bucket of Rocks cant catch enough of a break to get a season, gets Halloween-ish special instead. In it, he becomes No Longer A Ghost. Hooray for... writing? 

There’s not much to say about this one, it is what it is, and for a while, this was the only content we got centered around good ol Bucket of Rocks.

0/0, a ranking of this one wouldn’t be fair.

Season 7: Hands of Time

Angst! Drama! Time Travel! Technology jokes! Old Mentor is dying from Too Many Secrets, so Green Angst must lead team. FIYAH and Water Girl find their parents. I bet that’ll be important later!

The story feels choppy, and leaves a lot of threads hanging. It’s still fun, but less so that what came before and what comes after.

2/13: Guys, you had one job.

Season 8: Sons of Garmadon

The ninja get a facelift, and Green Angst gets a girlfriend! Guess which one is permanent. Evil Ex summons Evil Overlord(C) 2.0, causing Green Angst to loose Green and gain Angst.

The animation bump is stellar, the new voice actor for Green Angst really shines, and the story, while not new by any stretch, is filled with plenty of twists and turns.

9/13, Stellar Season.

Season 9: Hunted

The OG 4 in Mad Max on one hand, while Green Angst and Water Girl resist against tyrannical overbearing ruler on the other. Now with even more daddy issues, inspiring speeches, and of course, ANGST.

The storytelling and atmosphere increases in quality, and the show does a good job of balancing angst and hope. Also, then end is really cool. 

12/13, Great Atmosphere.

Season 10/March of the Oni

Everyone teams up to stop faceless CGI army! Wait, does that count if everything is CGI?

There’s not much to say on this one either. It feels both too short and too fast, and many of the story beats don’t hit like they should.

(6 1/2) / 13, Pretty OK.

Season 11 pt 1: The Fire Chapter

Local team gets lazy, unleashes witch, FIYAH looses fire, Frosty dies again. OR DOES HE!?

Even better animation, and the voice actors are really having fun for this season onwards. It’s one of the weakest of the newer seasons, but the shorter episode time helps every episode pack a punch.\

7/13, Would recommend as a starter season.

Season 11 pt 2: The Ice Chapter

Frosty becomes Frostbite and commits genocide. Is redeemed by power of friendship and amnesia. Let’s move on.

Character development, great moments, and thought provoking storytelling!? This season has all that AND a good grasp on the aesthetic!

10/13, Please forgive Frosty. He didn’t mean it.

Season 12: Prime Empire

AT-AT gets his own season again, enacts plot of Tron Legacy, but better! Also, Frosty becomes a detective.

The obligitory videogame plot is done really well. Lots of fun is poked at videogame mechanics and it makes for a quippy and fast paced season. Just like AT-AT! 

11/13, videogame movie(?) done right. 

Season 13: Master of the Mountain

Bucket of Rocks finally gains own season, proves that he is the best character. Gains a best friend and beats her dad in combat. 

Beautiful set pieces, awesome character development, lore, jokes, and heartfelt moments, I consider this to be the single best season of the newer ones, and possibly even the whole show. 

13/13, amazing season

BONUS!

The Lego Ninjago movie:

Kung Fu High School AU with a dash of Star Wars. Different from the series? Sure. Super fun? Absolutely!

8 out of 10 Meowthras.

Wu’s Teas:

Wise Old Mentor(C) opens teashop. Shenanigans ensue.

10 out of 10, if you don’t laugh at at least one, something is wrong.

[asterfeathers]

cole ninjago headcanons!!

long bc i don’t know how a tumblr works and can’t. figure. how .to. put. under.cut,,

- black(ma)/vietnamese(dad)

- kind chocolate brown eyes with orange. very pretty. after dod his left eye (where the scar is) turned a bright green

- heavy sleeper,snores

- dad energy

- animals love him

- wherever he goes the nature around him brightens up, sometimes flowers bloom. the villagers, farmers especially love when he visits cuz he helps around and the earth is very fertile and alive when he’s there

- he retained some ghost abilities, but he needs to put a lot of effort into them and unlocking them. back to square one basically.

- he’s highly regarded amongst ghosts cuz when the preeminent was banished she was weakened and cole gained her powers and is basically king of ghosts (this is definitely not canon i just like the sound of op cole)

- whenever he’s around animals he gets all soft

- underrated and not as popular with fans

- deep down is envious of the others

- his fight with jay still stays with him. he never really got over some of the things jay said to him even if they were just in the heat of the moment.

- self esteem issues and believes he isn’t as important as others and is the least important out of his entire team

- views the others as his family and is very loving

- best hugs. warm,comforting and grounding

- gay. seriously gay

- when he and jay were fighting over nya it was mostly a misunderstanding cuz cole didn’t actually like nya but wanted to get back at jay and was definitely repressing his emotions (and gayness *cough*)

- trans. goes by he/they and ghost themed neopronouns

- everyone goes to him for support

- he has difficulty expressing his emotions sometimes

-he doesn’t talk about his feelings but gets mad at others when they bottle theirs up

- he can be really funny and witty when he opens up

- incredibly loyal

- writer and artist

- he can actually sing and dance really well but he’s insecure about it. he’s even written some songs.

- he needs to be forced to rest bc he’s a workaholic and he will work himself to the bone without intervention. especially when he’s sick

“cole you need to rest you’re sick”

“i’m fine”

“no you’re not rockhead go to bed and i’ll get zane to make you some soup”

- the team loves him bc how can you not

- supports lloyd with things kai can’t

- very trustworthy with everything but cooking

- loves driving and travelling

- he’s banned from the kitchen

- before wu found him he was travelling around everywhere. sailing, hiking, mountain climbing, everything. was homeless for a period of time.

- he loves watching the stars

- his mother sang to him and told him about her battle stories. he didn’t think they were real at the time of course but he likes to reminisce about them

- big strong man. almost a himbo but he’s actually really intelligent

- amazing at strategy and planning

- neat freak. likes things being organised, unlike kai. when kais room gets really messy he cleans it bc he gets so frustrated

- a lot of unresolved trauma. mans got mommy and daddy issues cmon.

- he loves sweet things (this is basically canon)

- he’s very close with the og 4. jay and him talk a lot. he and kai are very close and will comfort each other. he and zane give each other cuddles

- as a kid really liked geography and dinosaurs

- the ninja go to him when they have nightmares

- big sweetheart honestly

- wu once slipped up and called him dad

- he has somewhat long hair

- he has some grey hairs from being a ghost

- ptsd from falling, dying multiple times and being turned into a ghost. he fears heights. it takes him a while to get over it and go climbing again.

- if you were his partner you would not lack affection at all. but he’s not much a kisser and is very shy at first.

- plays with his hair sometimes

- really loves music. the sound grounds and calms him

- sticks his tongue out while concentrating. he’s planning out a mission and he’ll just have his tongue out. the others find it adorable

- has a very foul mouth when he gets really angry (he was basically homeless for a long while before wu found him. imagine what he would have picked up travelling)

- patient but has an explosive anger. he can get pretty scary. this big guy that could benchpress a mountain towering all over you with stone cold fury.

- actually pretty sensitive

- almost cries every time he hears sad stories about animals

- if you don’t wake him up he will sleep the entire day

- not a head canon but that one season 1/2 outfit where he had belt/chain things on the sides of his pants. the eboy blueprint

- very good fashion sense

- rich boy what with his father being a very prolific performer and probably with a wealthy family

- oblivious when it comes to flirting

- takes a lot of connection to form a crush/interest in someone

- he and kai sometimes go to volcanoes together

- would protect the ninja (especially lloyd and zane) with his life.

- can make very good beverages (this is actually pretty canon- when the ninja were celebrating getting the fang blades and cole made the punch in like season one)

- teases everyone. calls lloyd ‘squirt’ and other such nicknames still

- likes going to parks and climbing trees. the other ninja just watch as he scales the tree at inhuman speed. jay and kai try to beat him and fail every time.

- he can often be found passed out somewhere and snoring, often out of bed. he has some weird sleeping positions and the others take photos whenever they find him sleeping somewhere.

- he’s pretty much like a cat

- eats messily sometimes (his dad especially hates this)

- favourite cake is chocolate mud cake (unoriginal i know but i don’t care)

- smells like rain and the earth, if warmth /home was a smell

- he’s a child of hades. geokinisis, death themes, cmon

- loves reading

- a big old nerd

- put ungodly amounts of sugar in his tea and coffee while the ninja (mostly zane) stare at him concerned

- his eyes reflect light in the dark like a cat. he’s scared jay a few times in the hallways at midnight when he’s just standing there, eyes glowing

- zones out a bit

- resting bitch face

- bc earth is both life and death, this ties into his ghostly abilities and possibly him using his powers for healing

[captnjacksparrow]

First thank for answer my question about Sarada and Sasuke in Boruto, I think it's really interesting how you talk about the family relationship from an asian perspective. Maybe I can't fully understand how family and bonds are in asian culture because I'm latinoamericana from Argentina and family is really closed for as like father or mother relationship could be pretty closed with their kids not always but it's normal be really closed to your parents.

Besides, I have to say that I really dislike Boruto for many things although I have to admit that Kishimoto and Kodashi play the daddy issues card pretty well because even if I dislike both Boruto and Sarada I can't deny that I understand both of them. First I understand Sarada because I have the same relathionship with my father how never really care or want to talk with me, of course both aren't the same but I understand with Sarada is bitter with her father and likes Naruto because it's realistic for her wants a dad like him because she sees him at least in the village and she is jealous of Boruto because he has a father there and he still complains. On the other hand I understand Boruto was bitter because he's a teennager and I was like him, I was bitter with my mother for not spend time with me because she was working and raising me like a single mother because she didn't have any other support but I was like Boruto and didn't understand how hard she worked and it was the same with Boruto that didn't understand how hard Naruto had to work for the village.

Being honest, it isn't weird the relatioships that Boruto and Sarada have with their parents, both of them see in the other the lifes they would like having, Sarada wished Naruto was her father because he spent some time with his family and they saw him almost every day, Boruto likes Sasuke more because he sees him likes this cool guy that is an strong ninja and goes to wild mission unlike his fathers. However, it's funny that if Boruto was in Sarada's place and Sarada was in Boruto's both of them stills would be bitter about their parents for differents reasons.

Ahhh!!! Now I get it!!! Anon. 😊😊

I can't blame your perspective and it's very relatable to think of that way. Because you have both parents who resembles Naruto and Sasuke in some way, and you relate yourself to both Boruto and Sarada sometimes.

Just my two cents,

This Boruto series itself is a big piece of trash. So, please, please, dont take inspiration or reference from this series. It's not even worth it.

My reasons are

Boruto is an abominable series that shouldn't have existed in the first place.

Naruto series was a success because of the characters' tragic flashbacks and how they pull themselves up from nothing. Since all New Gen characters are the carbon copies of the characters from Naruto we know so well, they won't have any backstories. How do you give stories to them??? By making their parents into their Asshole version you see today. It's just a ploy to make the New Gen characters shine by making the old characters bad.

Objectively speaking, It's a message to the readers/viewers that if you shoulder a precious dream where you don't even have time for yourself, then don't fucking marry. If you marry then dont spew out kids. This is what I took from this series, anon. Because, these guys with their noble dreams, they shouldn't have married in the first place. Or they, say Naruto, should have shared their dreams with their partners, say Hinata, rather than 'a friend' 😊😊 say Sasuke.

It’s another message for little girls in hopeless love that ‘Girl!!!! Fucking move on and do something with your life. If you end up marrying a boy who never acknowledged you, this is what will happen’.

My final reasoning would be a farfetched one, but funny. Kishi can write a good couple dynamics like ShikaTema. He could very well make a scene where Naruto and Hinata walks together and speak something after Pain arc. We, readers, would get it. Instead of writing something like that for our Main Characters Naruto and Sasuke, he wrote up a garbage for them. SS was a nightmare and NH was stained with the blood of Neji. I find it as something Kishi doesn't want to do this but forced to write this because of popularity. So, Kishi gave them, the shippers, all they want and now trashing them mercilessly. Like he was indirectly saying, 'this is what happens if you make me do something I don't like'. Otherwise, why would he make Sarada look like Karin?. So, instead of taking this series too personally, consider it as a revenge from Kishi who is trolling the shippers.

So, anon, watch Boruto like a fun project rather than connecting yourself with that sewage. Because it's not worth it. 😒😒😒

[calypsoff2]

One. Part 2

Taking in a deep breath, you know how hard it is to not want to pick Imani up and take her up the stairs. Her adamant self-wanting to go up the steps herself, she is doing this one by one too. This is very boring but also tires her out, she is always the one awake, but we have an early flight out. What I mean by that is that we are flying out at four in the morning so these girls will need to be awake, it’s really going to be me holding them and dragging them onto the flight, but it’s getting then to sleep is the issue. It’s barely nine so I hope the other two are attempting to go to sleep “why have you just restarted that!? Imani, you were on the right path” I know this girls isn’t restarting the stair count “doesn’t matter now, we are here” unlocking the stair gate at the top “one, two. I do it dad” can she hell do it, she thinks she can. Pushing the gate open, grabbing her arm and lifting her over the gate, she ran off and of course is going into her sister’s room. Closing the gate behind me, Rylee and Tianna both share a room, we let the girls decide and they wanted that but they argue constantly so I think we will be splitting them up soon, it’s Imani that has her own room but she doesn’t need her room when she sleeps in my bed every time “are you girls ready for bed” looking down at my phone, I have many messages right now that I need to read “dad, we decided” looking up from my phone “Imani, get out of Rylee’ bed now. Yes baby?” Rylee has a plan “we really think you’re terrible at hair, we also think we should do movie night in your bedroom tonight oh and also we should get the phone back” she tries it “no because you both can’t be nice but how about we try and call mommy?” Their faces lit up; I say they I mean the elder two. Imani is just herself “come on, we will do it together, and nobody mentions London, that is the rule ok?” Making my way to Tianna’ be “move up” these little ass beds “dad you’re big” I chuckled getting comfy, Rylee jumped right on me “ah! Damn girl, what is this?” She jumped from one bed onto me “I am getting comfy” Imani eventually made her to me “look at your top mama, you are a mess” she got half her body out of her top, she is crazy. Grabbing Imani and lifting her onto the bed “right, after this. Please girls, go to sleep. I need to pack, and I don’t need the drama” these girls are climbing on me, literally climbing all on me to get the best view. Moving my head to the side to see my own phone, they really miss their mother.

I cringed at the FaceTime not being answered, I did it twice too and the anticipation of her picking up with the girls I felt that and now I feel bad that she didn’t pick up “mom is busy I think” Rylee said “it’s my birthday still” Tianna was quick to add, she really isn’t letting it pass with Robyn not communicating with her “let’s try Mel, auntie is always on her phone isn’t she” trying to play it off, nobody said anything but I tapped on Mel’ name and hoped for the best “I already spoke to auntie though?” Tianna whined out “it’s not about you” Rylee retorted “be quiet the both of you” I felt a sigh of relief when she answered, waiting for it to connect properly “god damn, I look awful” I laughed at the pixelated image “you good, you good” I said laughing “awww is my little angels ready for bed?” Mel said seeing our faces “I am thank you” I answered laughing “negro!” She spat at me, looking from the background Mel is there for what show will happen “ain’t it like the middle of the night there?” I questioned “yep, things happened that had to be dealt with. I miss you girls so much, I really do” that is not the point I need Robyn to speak to the birthday girl “where is Robyn?” I questioned; Mel paused looking away from the camera “Jah! Where is Robbie?” Mel shouted, Tianna little face is really upsetting me right now “Ti, I told you that you need to be a big girl” Rylee said but Tianna is crying now, she is in tears over this “mom loves you Ti” Rylee consoled her this time without being a pain, watching her hold Tianna’ face in her hands, she means business my eldest “she loves us all! Just she has been really busy, we know mom is going to be back soon!” Looking back at Mel; I don’t even care like that now Robyn has no choice but to do this “girls, daddy needs to pee. Tianna baby, mommy is coming to the phone don’t worry” getting up from the bed “Imani, no” she is going to follow me, of course she is.

Imani followed me to the bathroom “Imani, what are you doing?” She is getting unchanged right now “Mel, like what the hell you doing? Don’t you know where she is?” Looking at the phone, she looks lost. Changing the FaceTime to a call instead, placing it against my ear “not that, she is talking to a big boss of LMVH. He’s here so like it’s hard to get her attention, I’ve asked Jah to say but he won’t because of him being the big boss pretty much “Mel, Tianna is crying because she hasn’t said happy birthday to her. I expected her to at least be around for when they go to sleep, why hasn’t she said it to her? I don’t get it, it’s one fucking minute, Imani! What are you doing?” My daughter has really just got butt naked, I died a little inside because the way she is staring at me and peeing on the floor “wow, you’re a nightmare” now she’s made more mess for me “you know what Mel, tell her forget it” I can’t even chase her about this, the cries of Imani now, this is crazy “it’s busy there, I’m sorry” disconnecting the call “why are you crying?” She pointed at the Bath sobbing her little heart out “I want that” she cried pointing “so you peed on the bathroom floor so you can have a bath knowing I am busy already? Thanks” I huffed out, walking to the door and unlocking it. Dragging it open “Rylee!?” I shouted, looking back at Imani “don’t you dare move!” I shouted at her, she fell to the floor and cried more “yeah dad?” She is sheepish; she is up to no good “I would appreciate it if you can get Imani night clothes out for me on her bed and pass me a towel too” Rylee is trying to peak in “is mom not answering? Can we please have our phone?” Shaking my head “just do me that and then go to bed after that” Rylee nodded her head and walked off, Imani is a pain.

All that commotion and Imani making it about herself my two eldest daughters have fallen asleep, in the same bed. I don’t know what they were gossiping about, but they are asleep and that is the main point, I need to pack their things, but I will have a nap before I do “ssshh” I said to Imani, she isn’t asleep. She is really annoying, and I think that’s because she’s like me “let’s go to bed” I still can’t believe she stripped naked, peed on the floor because she wanted a bath, she is something else that girl. My phone started vibrating in my hand, it’s Mel. She has been calling a few times so let me answer this “yo” answering the call “damn nigga, take your time answering” I laughed leaning down to grab Imani’ arm, she is going to run off like she does “I know, busy guy. It’s hard taking care of three kids, you know” I dragged out “I totally understand that Chris, as I was saying that she was with the big boss, and we didn’t want to say anything but now she’s walked off again. But she mentioned it, and when she talks about it she cries, I’m not even putting it on so I think she’s just closed off from it but I guess it’s not possible? My little ninja is asleep?” Sighing out “she is, there is one that is awake though. You know what I will do anything for my daughters, I would stop an event for them” the line went silent, closing the bedroom door “that’s between you both, but she is suffering Chris” Imani ran off as she does, she will be back “I’ll be in London for her event, I know how important this is and the girls will be there. Surprise for her, don’t say it to her though” Mel gasped “no way; she is going to cry. It’s been the hardest time anyways, keep in contact with me. Is TJ coming?” Shaking my head “just me and the girls” Mel cooed out, I am just not happy about this at all “call me though, like I know this has been hard. I just wish it was different for you both, but she is going to be happy to see you all” I feel like not going now “to be honest just don’t let Robyn call me, I don’t want to speak to her. She hasn’t bothered to even care to call Tianna, it’s not cool. Imani! Get out now, I mean it. I am sick” she is being so naughty right now “the favourite, I adore her so much” she should have went with Robyn “then take her, damn” since she loves her that much “is it Chris?” oh Robyn is there, I am not in the mood for her.

There was a silence, while there was I placed Imani on the bed, she can just start getting comfy “I am sorry” that is the first thing Robyn said “I don’t need the apology, it’s the girl that was crying on me all day on her birthday. You are wack for that, I don’t care if you are upset about it she is a fucking child. You’re a grown fucking adult Robyn, are you serious?” I did say I would be good, but I can’t help it “I know, I did call you, but you didn’t pick up. Then I got side tracked with this, I will make it up to her. Don’t be like that with me Chris, when I said I would be away for a while we both agreed, I even said bring the girls here and we can just get a private tutor and you said no, you will keep them there. I am suffering too, I miss them. I am working my ass off while you send me cute pictures and spending time with the kids, I miss that, I do and you’re there judging me” I didn’t even say anything, but she is crying “can you just relax, you need to sleep. Just let me know, keep in touch with me, we are going back to the house, I will tuck her in bed, take care” Mel said, she knows I am judging her. This is why she stormed off the phone crying, I dislike arguing when she is so far apart from me, but it just annoyed me, I won’t call her back or anything, but I will just text her to say it’s ok, soon we will be united and whatever “Imani, why are you like this? I feel like you should have been my son, lay down in bed now” reaching over and snatching the remote from her, she keeps playing about with the TV “peppa pig” she pointed at the TV “my ass, in bed now” her fat ass all out of breath from being a menace.

I literally bought the girls in their nightclothes; I don’t know how I did this, but I did it. They all half asleep just going through the airport but the lady in business class has been so kind and got the girls extra pillows “early start for them” the flight attendant said, I grinned “for me too, I was the one dragging them out, it was a mission to do this. I thought let’s just keep the clothes on and get them on here, we can change after” she cooed out “they are so sweet, exhausted too. They are going to wake up on the plane and going to a different country. Well you are lucky, you have business class all to yourself so if you need anything then let me know” it’s kind of dope that we the only ones in business class, shit is dead as fuck. I was going to get the jet but if I did then Robyn would know, just because Tina would tell her, and I can’t be bothered to tell Tina too, so I just got on a plane but going there in comfort of course. I guess I can relax, the girls are asleep. I can sleep for a little and then start getting them ready once they wake up, I packed a whole carry on case just for this moment. I packed badly but we can always buy clothes while we in London anyways.

My daughters are so beautiful, like it makes me smile how beautiful they all are “dad you really matched us like this?” Rylee said pulling a face “honestly I didn’t do it on purpose, I needed to leave so I saw these Burberry dresses and I was like we got to go, grabbed them and got the shoes. But look how beautiful you look and you want to say thank you to the lady, she did your hair” Rylee looked behind her “it’s not like my mom” Rylee says this all the time “I agree too” the flight attendant said “but thank you, it’s better then my dad” the flight attendant laughed “not a problem pretty” Tianna is watching something on her tablet with Imani at the side of her, she is quiet so I will take that “dad” Rylee sat on my lap “this sounds like you’re going to ask me something, did I ever tell you that your mannerisms is like your mom?” she nodded her head “everyday but mom is amazing, but dad. Ti really wanted a party right, I think we should do a big party. She didn’t want one without mom” raising and eyebrow “you tease her all day every day and now you nice” she laughed “because I can” shaking my head “be nice, but we shall see what we can do. Also you’re going to hate me, I left your phone that you both share at the house, I only got the tablet” now she is not happy “how am I supposed to message my friends now dad!” she got off my lap, well that got her off my lap then.

Rylee and Tianna pushing Imani in the stroller while I deal with the luggage “you two, can you now run with her like that please” I had to put Imani in a stroller, she would run off without a care “I will!” Tianna shouted, walking through the airport with these three is no fun, we had two toilet breaks before we got passed security. The major thing here is that we made it, we are in London “worst part here is I need to pee, but I don’t trust anyone or anything to be just leaving them, so I am going to be a big boy and hold it in “how much more walking dad?” Tianna asked “just a little more, we are nearly there. See the driver is there” I can see my name written “Chris Brown?” he said, nodding my head “welcome to London sir, let me take your luggage” all I can think is thank god but I don’t even know where we are going, I will call Mel and meet up with her “follow me sir the car is just there” looking to the side of me, some random people started waving at the girls “these are Rihanna daughters” waving the girls over “here, come. Let’s go, thanks brother” the driver took the bags for me “let me push the stroller, you walk in front now” this is hectic as hell, I ain’t ever doing this again in my life.

[rinnnyxr]

Cancer an unpaid therapist terrifying when angered there for you when no one else is loves sleep laughs literally at anything selfless quite but smart speak their mind fall in love quickly supportive introverted reliable sometimes over emotional really strong under pressure overthinks a lot honest but secretive cut people out of their life easily worried about future sensitive apologizes too much so sweet unless you trigger them can understand others really well polite faithful stylish 19/25

Scorpio straightforward can be stubborn passionate observant and cautious opinionated sweet if treated well love and hate with their whole heart secretive feelings are intense over protective mysterious has a really strong personality hate losing true and loyal friends likes to be in control brave savage mature can be brutally honest emotional but doesn’t show it can get obsessed fast dark humor their emotions are so deep they seem tough from outside can go from cute to scary in a second 18/25

Pisces generous don’t tolerate rude and judging people good at telling stories escapist get used by some people a lot empathetic introverted and quite artistic sensitive sometimes selfless always daydreaming hopeless romantic loyal to a fault not argumentative but stand up for what they believe like to help people mature get along with different kind of people forgive fast but doesn’t forget sweetest if well treated feels other people’s emotions can spot fake and lie easily great sixth sense scary when angry secretive and vague independent 16/25

-

I am happy right now. I am 5’6” or taller. I have a boyfriend/girlfriend. I like to read books for fun. I like horror films. I like science fiction films. I like romance films. I have been in a car accident. I believe in ghosts. I like Nicholas Sparks novels. I believe in reincarnation. I have had my wisdom teeth pulled. I pray on a regular basis. I have a bible. I read the bible. I have been to another continent. I have a crush on one of my friends. I am not a virgin. I have lived in the same house my entire life. I like talking on the phone. I have read comic books. I collect something. I have done drugs before. I have smoked before. I have gotten drunk before. My parents are still together. I have written a song before. I think I can sing well. I have blonde hair. I have brown hair or black hair. I have red hair I have unnatural coloured hair. I have freckles. I have stretch marks. I am straight. I am gay. I am neither or somewhere in between. I have been in a fist fight before. I have performed something in front of 20 people or more. I have self harmed. I have attempted suicide. I have been abused by a relationship partner. I have been abused by a family member. I have run away from home. I have self harmed for more than four years. I like to cook food. I like to bake food. I have a dog. I enjoy camping. I can fit my hand inside a Pringles can. I have changed for someone else. I like to read fanfiction. I like to write fanfiction. I have used a typewriter before. I have skiied before. There is someone I’ve had a crush on for more than four months. I have talked to that person today. I live on my own. I prefer texting over calling. I talked to my dad today. I’m keeping a secret from someone I care about a lot. I like to sing in the car. I hum a lot. I had a bully in school. I was a girl/boy scout. I am Batman. I’ve stolen from my parents before. I’ve stolen from a store before. I have a favourite piece of classical music. Chinese food is my favourite. I have a favourite ninja turtle.

-

You pretty much always have a cup of tea or a bottle of water with you. You think enjoying the moment is more important than catching it on camera. You enjoy watching documentaries. You spend most of your time alone and have no close relationships. You joined Pottermore and were sorted into Gryffindor. You have a dry and sarcastic sense of humour. Long, dark winter nights drain you. Summer is by far your favourite season and lifts your mood a lot. A lot of the time you have to laugh at your own bad luck. Your mood plummets if you don’t follow a health and fitness routine. Your favourite ever music video is Lana Del Rey’s Ride. You love lazy summers spent going for walks and lounging in the garden. You love to spend your time lost in a good book. You watch American Horror Story and Asylum is your favourite season so far. You’ve overcome a lot over the last year but have slipped up recently. You prefer sitting exams to completing coursework. You love long car journeys spent listening to music. You find learning about how people lived in the past interesting. Your parent’s closed-minded attitudes frustrate you. You’ve grown very used to loneliness. You prefer getting up early and having productive mornings. You try to enjoy dancing in public but you still feel very awkward. You can’t even be bothered to hold grudges and find them pointless. Winona Ryder is one of your favourite actresses. You don’t find award shows very interesting. You have no patience for people who are glued to their phones. You’re a bit of a hypochondriac. You enjoy warm evenings spent doing yoga in the garden. Sunsets are one of your favourite things about the planet. You prefer to avoid medication but appreciate it’s necessity sometimes. You find talking to older people easier than talking to ones your own age. You’re naturally quiet and content with being that way. Your handwriting seems to change every time you pick up a pen. You dislike the thought of ever being dependent on anybody. Texting bores you and you’d rather just make a phone call. You like to hear about other people’s music tastes. You prefer to keep your living space clean and tidy. Anxiety controls you more than you’d like to admit. You can hardly even cope with being around people because of it. You can’t decide whether you prefer cities or countryside. You’re pretty much incapable of ever relaxing. You like discovering and being introduced to new music. Your favourite song by The Smiths is What Difference Does It Make. You procrastinate things you don’t feel capable of doing perfectly. You keep pretty much everything to yourself. You have quite a temper but you’re good at controlling it. You much prefer skirts and dresses to jeans. You’re not really a fan of alcohol anymore. Your parents let you down when you needed them the most. You have a pretty awful relationship with your mum and it upsets you. You dream of finding a sense of belonging somewhere. You’re a fan of The Cure. You love doing toning exercises, especially stomach workouts. Patience is definitely not a trait of yours. You don’t expect anybody to take an interest in you or be there for you. The Devil and God Are Raging Inside Me is one of your favourite albums. You’re a university student. You waste too much time on Tumblr and the internet in general. You’re an Arctic Monkeys fan. You’ve read and loved The Outsiders by S.E Hinton.

-

I AM: outgoing, a sister, overwhelmed, helpful, kind, overweight, tall, caring, a shopaholic, energetic, hopeful, smart, over 18, religious, sexually active, a mother, a good singer, ugly, insecure, a natural blonde, a leader, shy, inquisitive, determined, thirsty, frustrated, registered to vote, independent, hungry, self-conscious, a hard worker, skinny, paranoid, in love, a college/uni student, a dreamer, a movie buff, usually happy, easily entertained, quiet, a daddy’s girl, a smoker, employed, happy with my life, anxious, a pothead, healthy, on a desktop.

I HAVE: an iphone, a laptop, anxiety, drugs, a tumblr, an addiction, a dog, my own car, a degree, a job, trust issues, a temper, a brother, a big house, blue eyes, a lot of clothes, a twin bed, a big family, netflix, to pee, odd taste in music, a large book collection, fast internet, a big imagination, my license, curly hair, short hair, a messy room, acne, a phobia, a medical condition, an awkward smile, some kind of collection, taken over 1,000 surveys, a personal blog that nobody sees but me, gotten lost while driving, been to warped tour, big feet, bills to pay, a lot of strong opinions, a pool, an xbox, a cold, a lot of music, more than two piercings.

I WANT: a boyfriend, more money, a better body, to adopt, to move out, a new computer, to lose weight, something I cannot have, food, a baby, my hair to grow out, a new life, to be more confident, a tattoo, fast food, alcohol, more friends, to go on vacation, to see a new movie coming out, to go shopping, a new phone, a piercing, concert tickets, someone to hang out with, to start working out, to be famous, to see a certain someone, more clothes, to donate blood, bigger boobs, someone to cuddle with, a job, smaller thighs, to learn how to play an instrument, my favorite band to release a new album, someone to love, a new pet, to go to sleep, to grow up, to change something about my personality, breakfast food, them to make a new pokemon game, a new ipod, a popsicle, to learn a new skill, to be more organized, to go to college, someone to bring me breakfast in bed.

I THINK: abortion is wrong, xanga is dying, I’ll die young, I’m a good person, too often, I’m going to hell, pickles are gross, a lot of popular things are overrated, people underestimate me, my taste in music is perfect, I need a new layout, I’m pretty responsible, gay marriage should be legal, I’m going to dye my hair soon, I’m funny, I’m going to make a huge decision soon, my parents hate me, I’m pretty, I have a mental disorder, I annoy people, something is seriously wrong with me, of better days, a lot of Disney Channel stars grow up to be trash, The Hunger Games is overrated, the best things in life are free, popular music is pretty awful, I could be a vegan, I’ll make a good mother, I spend too much money on clothes, I’m too good for guys my age, I worry too much, goths are scary, the survey community is dying, politics are stupid, foreign languages are interesting, hipsters are annoying, bolding surveys are the best, everything is better with cheese, Twilight is overrated, I will be alone forever, I might go to bed soon, I may try something new soon, I’m pretty boring, I may never stop taking surveys, McDonald’s is gross, celebrities are overpaid, people use me a lot, Valentine’s Day is a joke, nobody is truly original.

I LOVE: animals, shopping, cooking, going to concerts, jewelry, glitter, reading, bright colors, make up, taking pictures, hot showers, texting, going to the theater, children, anime, being girly, working out, my life, where I live, summer, fruit, candles, photography, eating, learning, rainy days, walking, painting my nails, doing my hair, music, xanga, facebook, feeling needed, getting comments, tumblr, helping others, volunteering, cuddling, chewing gum, youtube, dresses, touch screens, decorating, writing, finding money in my pockets, Comedy Central.

I HATE: cleaning, driving, big crowds, politics, religion, musicals, talking on the phone, crying, fast food, going to the doctor, meat, vegetables, sitcoms, my body, my life, my parents, long fingernails, bad grammar, cocky people, being single, facial hair, having no signal, losing, working, doing the dishes, bugs, children, straight edge kids, racists, going to the dentist, going to school, arguing, hospitals, being pale, having scars, hot weather, wearing socks, listening to the radio, animal cruelty, stretched ears, wearing glasses, when nobody texts me back, anime, having nothing to do, when I have stray hairs stuck to my shirt, waiting, bad hair days.

[dorizardthewizard]

TLNM musings, part 2

Okay, here I ramble about problems with the movie. Ended up adding more stuff since I first wrote this :’P

Screentime and characterisation of the other ninja:

One of the biggest complaints from fans... they're all introduced individually with very different personalities, they’re told they each have a special element they control, making you feel like they should each get some moment to shine and affect the plot of the movie, but then none of that happens. Ultimately you could take out all the ninja and the story would be the same, you don't even necessarily need them for Lloyd's character since his journey of reconnecting with his father and bringing his family together can still work without them. It's so sad because if you read and watch extra material, you can tell thought went into their personalities, but we never get to see this as they're all just lumped together, mostly there to support Lloyd's development.

For someone who hasn't seen the show, it must feel a bit off seeing characters with distinguished personalities and no payoff for it; take Zane for example. Imagine not knowing anything about the characters and seeing one of them is a robot, for some reason? You wonder why he's a robot, what significance that has for the plot and why it's important for his character (I mean they missed a big opportunity to develop Zane from always trying to fit in and seem like a “normal teenager” to accepting that he's different but that that doesn't mean he's less valid), but then this really specific characteristic is never expanded on except for comedy purposes. People probably thought “oh, guess it makes more sense in the show”, but this just detaches viewers and makes them feel like they're missing something if they haven't seen the show beforehand.

Sigh, still gotta give the crew credit for fitting in a load of little subtle details about the ninja, I had to rewatch it a couple of times because there were things I didn’t notice at first, like Kai sliding down a bannister in the Temple of Fragile Foundations and falling off :’D

Group dynamic:

Another thing that bothered me is that the movie isn't that good at making you care about them as a team. They're already established as friends but I wish there were more material showing us how much they care about each other. The Kai hug scene was 10/10 but then when Chen and the other cheerleaders started picking on Lloyd, nobody said or did anything? In merchandise it said Kai is a hothead who isn't afraid to speak up or stand up to people, then show it in the movie! Him and Nya should have been on the verge of tackling that guy to the floor! Ok, I can see Lloyd asking them not to get into fights as it makes people hate him even more and he probably feels guilty if one of the ninja gets into trouble because of him. This would still have given more emotional connection between the characters but we're never shown it, except in the novelisation where Cole tries to block Lloyd from his locker so he doesn't see the insult written on it, I think. But again, we shouldn't have to read/ watch extra material for that.

Instead of moments showcasing the ninja’s friendship and close bonds, we got the opposite- everyone turned on Lloyd incredibly quickly for one mistake. Sure, it was a pretty big one and resulted in Garmadon taking over the city and their mechs being wrecked, but Lloyd was the only one doing anything about Garmadon at the time and he didn't exactly know what the consequences of using the ultimate weapon were; it's not like he knew it could potentially hurt his friends. In fact, how did the ninja know he used it anyway? That would mean they already knew about it and what it could do, yet Lloyd was not told? In which case, how can they blame him?? Damn it Wu, why couldn't you just tell Lloyd that using the weapon would unleash a cat that could destroy the city, instead of vaguely saying the weapon can be dangerous in the wrong hands. That's taking too many pages from TV Wu's book!

Honestly, it's like the ninja were just one character either shunning Lloyd or supporting him, depending on what the plot needed :/ That scene where they're talking with Garmadon while carrying him through the jungle really rubbed me the wrong way because first, no one seemed to care that Lloyd is so snippy because he's been forced to work with the man who made his life hell, and second they joke about Lloyd with that very same person and imply they don't respect Lloyd as leader, as Jay says he doesn't usually want to listen to him when he's talking? What??

 Lloyd and Garmadon’s relationship:

I mentioned this in part 1, but they really didn’t execute this well- I feel like they had so much fun playing up Garmadon being the worst dad in the world that they forgot to give him redeemable qualities. It took me a second viewing to realise his relationship with Lloyd was actually pretty messed up, because they played off his despicableness as comedic and glossed over it by suddenly giving him a flashback to make it seem like he’s sorry. They wanted to go for the father-and-son-have-issues-but-reconnect story, and had Lloyd say “I wish we didn’t have to fight all the time” in his emotional ending, but that’s a line usually present in a daddy-issue story where both have a part to blame and there's issues with communication. In this, though? Lloyd did nothing wrong! It was just Garmadon being trash, and there wasn't even a particular scene of him recognising and apologising for his actions- not the bit about driving Misako away, but how he treated Lloyd after.

The message is all mucked up - hoping to find some good in neglectful parents is just gonna get you hurt, and in a story like this it would make more sense for the protagonist to realise they don't need validation from this guy, shouldn't feel like they have to keep connected with toxic relatives just because they're family, and that they should focus on the friends and family who actually love them (although, whether Lloyd's friends were even portrayed as liking him is a different story). I mean, Koko could just teach him to throw and catch! Does he have to have two parents just for that?

 Tone and humour:

I think another main reason this movie didn't do as well was its more childish tone and dialogue; unlike the previous two movies, it was marketed at younger children. One of the main reasons TLM and LB were so successful is because of the self-aware jokes that could actually be enjoyed by adults too, while in this movie I may have properly laughed only a couple of times. Plus, in its effort to connect with kid's humour it just got cringy in some parts, like the Ultimate Weapon compilation. It would have been funny if it was ironic, like Amazing World of Gumball style, but it just didn't come across like that, so I can see why many jokes fell flat for older audiences.

People probably had different expectations for the overall tone as well- everyone loved the previous LEGO movies because of their constant barrage of action, witty jokes and a ton of references. This was never the selling point of Ninjago, but TLNM didn’t manage to capture the show’s dramatic style and deep lore-driven plot either.

The writers:

Okay last thing. This movie had three directors, six producers, six screenwriters and seven people working on the story. Compared to most animated movies, that's a lot, and its shows. It feels like they had a few different ideas and themes and couldn't quite patch them together, with vague messages like “looking at things from a different point of view” being thrown in as well to try and link it up. I guess at the end of the day, this is a father-son story, and that makes it very difficult to fit in a power-of-friendship plot at the same time, but still. Also, the shifting plot and ideas is really clear in the trailers, I mean half the stuff there wasn't even in the movie, it's as if the entire story was changed!

 Final verdict? I think an overall theme with this movie is that the writers wanted to overhaul Ninjago to introduce it to new viewers, but also wanted to keep the fans happy so shoehorned in lots of elements from the show without giving them enough development. This just disappoints fans and alienates general audiences, which is a problem since Ninjago doesn’t have a huge following already backing it up like LEGO Batman did, and could have been the pilot for more original LEGO lines making it to the big screen. It was a technically amazing movie, with beautiful animation and visuals, an epic soundtrack and stunning voice acting, but it was also such a waste of potential.

 The only other thing we can do is think about how it could have gone differently, so here's some of my ideas :'D

NOT using the deleted time travel plot. I know that after being disappointed in a movie you welcome any alternative, but giant mechs were already a big deviation from the ninja theme; flinging in time travel as well would be too much for non-show watchers. Plus, I thought we were all complaining about how time travel in Ninjago always just messes things up :'P

Also not following the show closer. We have over 10 seasons of the show, the whole point of a movie is giving a fresh take; using a giant snake or the Overlord possessing Garmadon again would just be boring.

Delete the first act? One of the best parts of the secret high school heroes trope is seeing how they juggle both lives, if you're gonna drop it after half an hour there's not much point of it being there.

Could instead just have Garmadon attacking again, the last invasion attempt being ages ago. Maybe the ninja rediscover a rich history of elemental masters protecting Ninjago when Wu decides to get a new team together to fight the new threat?

Make it about learning master building instead so they build their mechs at the end, and then gain elements in a sequel?

Or don't mention anything about elements and have every ninja individually go through an obstacle to obtain an elemental weapon, then they all lose them but don't know they're not necessary, so it's actually a surprise that the power is inside them? Everyone gets a sort of true potential moment?

Ninja having to warm up to Garmadon's son, so we have a plot of Lloyd slowly gaining their respect and becoming leader?

Higher stakes at the end, make the Shark Army more threatening and have them turn on Garmadon using Meowthra, so there's still an intense climax of the ninja fighting the army before Lloyd reaches Meowthra and gets his emotional ending?

Get rid of the live action sequence, or make it fit the message of the story more?

Feel free to add any ideas/ thoughts!

[littleogreboii]

Take A Break

It’s time to get salty lads. (Aka a season 11 episode 1 fix it)

Summary: Wu was angry. The ninja had gone right back to being lazy after the Oni's defeat. But, maybe there's more to it. It lingers in the shadows of Cole's eyes. It lurks in Zane's sharp responses. It lures Jay away. It's hidden in the spark lighting Kai's mouth. It bleeds onto Nya's blistering hands. It revels in the muscles of Lloyd's shoulders, holding them prisoner. And Wu will realise everyone has a limit.

Warning: Discussion of PTSD, Dissociation, Bullying, Nightmares, Lloyd’s Daddy Issues, Lloyd’s Harumi Issues. Also, someone has a panic attack. SEASON 11 EPISODE 1 SPOILERS! (AS WELL AS PRIOR SEASONS)

AO3

“And we’re back to this.” Wu focuses his glare on his nephew, Lloyd, ignoring the way Lloyd looks away in shame. “After every big victory, you get lazy, complacent, careless.”

“Uh that is not true.” Kai complains.

“We’re recovering. We’re resting our muscles.” Cole stretches out his back to demonstrate.

It was months ago.” Wu points out.

“Months? Really?” Nya questions.

“Are you sure?” Cole adds.

Wu scowls. “Yes."

Kai bites his lip. “Ah well who’s counting?”

“I am.” Wu states. “Look at yourselves.” He pokes Lloyd in the stomach, scowling at the way his staff presses in. “You’ve gone soft. You do nothing all day, but play video games and eat cake and soak in this - in this -”

“Hot tub.” Cole smiles.

“It’s not a hot tub! It’s the sacred bell of divinity. Out! Out! All of you!” Wu shouts. He’s met with a chorus of groans and complaints. He presses on. “Emergency meeting in the monastery. In. Three. Minutes.”

They quickly gather in the monastery, not wanting to anger Wu anymore than they already have. They’re all still dripping by the time they make it in. Cole somehow manages to keep his hat throughout it all.

“You have become soft, lazy, flabby.” Wu walks down the line, eyeing each of the ninja as he proceeds.

“Nobody has gone soft, Master Wu. I promise you. We are in perfect condition.” Lloyd dares to defend them, but his point falls flat when Cole burps. He turns to glare at him, but Cole just shrugs in defense.

“Silence.” Wu demands.

“No.” Zane, who has remained silent all this time, speaks up.

“Pardon?” Wu’s gaze is instantly bearing down upon the nindroid.

“No.” Zane continues. “I do not believe you are correct in your observations.”

“What?” Wu bellows.

“You state that after every victory we become lazy, but that is not true.” Zane defends. “There is only one instance where we became lazy after the defeat of a threat and that was back after our very first victory.”

“Well, I would have thought you would have learned after the first time.” Wu argues.

“You forget not all of us were present during that time period.” Zane gestures towards Lloyd. “Lloyd was not with us at that point of time.”

“Yes, but my nephew should know better. I thought I raised him better than that.” Wu’s gaze is harsh and Lloyd flinches under it.

“Raise him?” Kai laughs. “You raised him? By the time he got here, he was what 10? And then it wasn’t long after he used the tomorrow’s tea. You can hardly claim responsibility for raising him.” Kai shuffles down the line to stand by Lloyd. “Besides, there’s really no reason for Lloyd to know better. He was raised in Darkley’s. A school for literal villains! There’s no way he learnt proper lessons from them.”

“He is the green ninja-” Wu tries to regain his ground.

“And look where that’s got him!” Kai interrupts. “He hasn’t had a break since the day he found out he was the green ninja! He probably couldn’t even relax at Darkley’s without risk. Maybe months is a long time, but he sure as hell deserves it! Heck he’s finally a healthy weight and you’re insulting him for it!” And Kai is right. Lloyd had been scrawny when he arrived and since then, they’d never really settled enough to get him up to a healthy standard. “So don’t you dare judge him! Yeah the rest of us should probably know better, but we were all so stressed after everything that has happened recently! Cole and Lloyd could have died for frick’s sake!” Kai is struggling to keep his powers in check and that’s the signal for Nya to take over.

“We were all hurt. Those first few days of the resistance-” Nya pauses, the memories threatening to bubble over. “We thought you were dead and it was a struggle to find reasons to keep going. Lloyd had no powers and Ha-” Nya stops at the name, glancing at Lloyd. He’s biting his lip and Nya fears that if he bites any harder, he’ll draw blood. “Lloyd had his heart broken and then had to fight his father again. Then, we finally get all of you back and Cole nearly dies. Then, Lloyd is nearly crushed. Everything just happened at once. We’re all tired Wu.”

“And it didn’t end there.” Cole is holding Lloyd’s hand tight. “Even though it’s all in the past, every time I close my eyes, it’s all I see. I can just see the bounty disappearing and feel the darkness overwhelm me.”

“I see neverending plains.” Jay continues. “I see us being stranded again in the first realm, only we never find anything. It’s just us and half a ship.” Jay frowns. “And sometimes, I can still feel myself slipping away.”

“I was the one who suggested we take a break.” Kai admits. “No one could focus. Cole couldn’t sleep. Jay was hardly present. Zane was colder than usual. Nya was always working on some kind of tech. Lloyd could hardly do anything without breaking down. And I could hardly keep my head straight. We were falling apart. We needed time to just be kids. And yeah, I know we’re ninja first, kids second, but we were killing ourselves Wu.”

Wu is silent for a few minutes. “Lloyd, what do you have to say about all of this?”

“I take full responsibility, Uncle. I should have been a better leader.” Lloyd’s eyes are empty as he states this, but his rigid posture betrays him.

“I see.” Wu turns away to pour himself a cup of tea. “I did not know you were so traumatised by recent events.”

“It’s not just recent events.” Lloyd trembles. “It’s everything. It’s just never ending. It just keeps going. First Darkley’s, then fighting my dad, then we thought Zane was dead, then I had to sacrifice my dad, then there was Morro, then we thought we lost you Wu, then there was just everything with the sons of Garmadon and- and-” Lloyd tries to force the words out, but his throat tightens.

“You can stop Lloyd. I understand.” Wu sighs.

“Just when will it be enough?!” Lloyd cries. He breaks. The flood gates break open. His lungs refuse to cooperate. His limbs reject him, leaving him to fall to his knees. Kai and Nya are by him instantly. Cole rests a hand on Jay’s shoulder, as they watch from a distance. Zane keeps an eye on Lloyd’s vitals, prepared to step in if it gets too bad. Wu stands to the side, shocked.

“Hey, Lloyd. I need you to breathe for me.” Kai squeezes Lloyd’s hand. “Come on. In, two three four.” He squeezes again. “Out, two three four.” And again. Nya rubs circles on Lloyd’s back. Kai continues instructing Lloyd for a few minutes, until Lloyd seems to be able to support himself.

“It’s ok, Lloyd. I’m here. Kai’s here. Cole’s here. Jay’s here. Zane’s here.” Nya reassures him. “We’re alive and well.”

Wu waits for Lloyd to calm down before speaking again. “Next week, we will resume training, for at least an hour a day. In the meantime, we will work on some relaxation techniques which aim to tackle the problem rather than avoid it. I am sorry for yelling at you all. I should have done better.”

Wu could not be sure that there was anything out there which could ease the ninja’s suffering.

[selieltheninja]

If you ever feel up to it, do you have any OC headcanons you could tell us? I love your OC's (and your art is absolutely amazing? Beautiful? My eyes have been blessed by it?!) and I'd love to here more about some of them!

Thank you!! I have a couple I can share~

My main Ninjago oc is Rohan:

- Loves making friends so if you even say hi to him he will refer to you as a friend

- can jam to anything even podcasts

- “rohan can you give this to your mom?” “which one i have like 20 moms.”

- he made his ninja gi lmao. it originally was a kabuki uniform.

- chakrams can turn into a double sided spear.

- everything about him is pink. he even dyed his hair pink once.

- hates noodles because he grew up eating it three times a day everyday.

- is sad he cant afford a gym membership

- his elemental dragon is very hallow looking and is almost invisible because it is made of sound and decibels. 

- rohan has echolocation ability. very useful for times when he forgets where he put his keys.

- has daddy issues lowkey. hes bitter his dad was a hit it and leave it guy.

- somewhat has a valley girl accent but its subtle.

- can also control vibrations, so he can basically move anything with the vibrations. this includes being aesthetic af and bending sakura petals around him

- tattooed flowers on his neck to represent his kabuki heritage.

Next is Sam, son of Ronin:

- ronin wanted sam to grow up to be just like him but unfortunately sam cried at everything when he was a kid

- passion is photography. hes like peter parker, photographing the ninja due to fascination. his favorite thing to take pictures of are candid shots of the green ninja.

- ronin still bothers sam a lot of carrying on his occupation. sam just goes along with it bc he loves his dad.

- always breaks up fights between his siblings, willow and rory.

- is studying to become a professional photographer. currently in high school.

- book smart but not street smart.

- cannot do sports. if u throw a football at him he would run away.

- tags along with ronin just to see the ninja.

- he got the white streaks on his hair because one of his friends told him he was too much of a goody two shoes to do anything rebellious.

Kitty, the gangster:

- high school drop out. she thought she didn’t need school to survive.

- one of rohan’s “sister from another mister (and mom)”

- is in a yakuza-like gang

- ofc it was bc she thought harumi was the cutest girl she’s ever seen and didnt know how to flirt properly

- puts kitty stickers on everything.

- she got her nickname from her scratching people all the time when she was young

- got a motorcycle.

- screams loudly when talking

- has adorable band aids that she carries around

Keanu, master of mist:

- more well versed in wielding a katana than his own powers.

- gets up at 5 every morning to prep sushi

- has very soft hands because he often has his hands dunked in sake when prepping meals

- hair was done as a bet from rohan.

- tattoo symbolizes his father and how he died without being able to achieve his true potential.

- isnt afraid of heights so he can jump off the roof without feeling fear.

- a lightweight drinker

- very awkward at showing affection towards his boyfriend, Chiru (owned by @ookamihanta) so he just… doesnt unless Chi does it first lmao

- keeps a sharp knife with him all the time

- his lips are always chapped bc lip care?? wtf is that

- has gucci brand eyebags 

- Works out in his small apartment by using old vhs workout tapes

Kaede, the master of Ferrolmagnetism (No ref yet)

- Animal symbol is the peacock

- Her power deals with anything that has magnetism in it, such as metals, alloys, magnetic fields, etc.

- She can cover her whole body with any type of metal she wants. Her favorite metal to cover herself in is platinum. And yeah, when she punches you it feels like a sack of bricks.

- Her elemental dragon is a very shiny metallic one, complete with wings that represent aurora borealis.

- Knew Harumi when they were friends in the orphanage.

- Aged out of the foster home. Upon getting out, she turned to a legion of Ninjas who do not have elemental powers, yet follow everything else.

[akaherosandwich]

FAO Defenders Crossover P.2: Chinese for Christmas Dinner

(Logistical note, this is the second half of a crossover thread between @foundoutthehardway, @atrxvido, @ironrand, and myself, of course (as Jessica). It, like Part 1, is somewhat unfinished, but the plot has moved well past.  Please enjoy these losers having dumplings on Christmas eve.)

The police arrived shortly after the mess had ended- while Jess was certainly not the biggest fan of the cops, especially not of Mercedes Knight, there wasn’t much more the heroes could do.  Not on Christmas Eve.  They all ducked out the back, hoping the papers would pin this ‘Christmas miracle’ on the Devil or something.

“Goodwill to all, and all that shit,” Jess spat, wiping her mouth with the back of her glove.  “I never went to Sunday school, but I definitely don’t remember ninjas in the nativity.  God, I can’t believe it’s Christmas in a few hours.”  Not that she particularly cared.  She never celebrated, but with Luke around… maybe they could have tried.  Jess had actually bought him what she imagined was a good gift, but she’d never given a good gift in her life.  Why start now?  She could give it to him later, when they got home.

To the apartment that had been set on fire.  Jess was going to have to do something about that, especially in light of this ninja business.

“Anyways, kicking ass worked up my appetite and honestly after not eating all day I’d like to take advantage of that,” she muttered, looking down the street to see if any neon signs were still on anywhere. Matt sighed, wiping the blood from his mouth on the back of his gloved hand. Ninjas weren’t going to be the death of him, but Jessica quite possibly was. “I was raised by nuns, and for once, you’re right about that. Merry Christmas, for what it’s worth.” Ah, shit, Christmas. Foggy. He wasn’t going to be able to hang around. Just as well. He didn’t want anyone else knowing his identity. “Look, there’s about a billion real noisy signs buzzing around here, but would you serve Daredevil?” He had to admit, he was hungry as well. He didn’t exactly eat well before he went out either. At least he wasn’t as bad as Jessica. “C’mon, you have to eat, when you’re - never mind.” Matt knew about the Hand, and he knew that it wasn’t going to go well if they got involved without him, but at the same time - he barely knew Luke and this new guy. Up until recently, his interactions with Jessica had been almost solely (somewhat) professional. Leaving the camera incident aside. “Look. I gotta go. But you have fun.”

“Oh, No, you don’t,” Luke said, grinning. “No way, man, you do all that parkour business, beatin’ bad folks up without even being able to see -- you eat with us. I know a Chinese restaurant owes me about a dozen favors, and we should be looking to hole up for a while. Don’t worry about the warehouse, Misty’s got our backs.”

And their numbers. And probably a whole lot of community service hours for Luke. But that was tomorrow’s problem. Luke slung an arm around Jessica’s shoulder, and another around Matt’s.

“Mushu pork! Szechuan beef. Enough dumplings to sink the Titanic. Come on, it’s Christmas Eve, I’m gonna be a daddy, and we opened a dozen cans of whup on those fake ninjas. We should be celebrating. … and probably hiding.”

After the fight came to its seemingly inevitable conclusion, Danny wasn’t sure what to…. do. Of course, he already had notions of a lean, mean, fighting team spinning around in his head, but he did his best to tamp down such expectations. Jessica and the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen weren’t exactly the joining type. 

Luke seemed nice, though.

“You’re going to be a dad?” Danny couldn’t help but splutter. His eyes moved back and forth between Luke and Jessica several times. He pulled off his crappy ski mask to squint more meaningfully at them. 

Was Jessica….?

In any case, Chinese - especially off-brand American Chinese - sounded much better than Lean Cuisine. “Luke can pick the place, but dinner’s on me.”

Jessica saw the way the masked stranger was eyeing her after Luke’s excited blabbering.  She kept her hands stuffed in her jacket pockets and shrugged.  “Yeah, yeah.  But don’t go making a big deal about it, okay?”  Despite herself, she managed a smile and gave Luke a quick peck as he threw his arm around her.

When Danny removed his mask, she just about spluttered in surprise.  “Wait, Danny fucking Rand?  Are you serious with the- the… the dragon punching stuff back there?  I thought I told you not to worry about it on the phone.”  Jess paused.  “But at least you held your own in there.  Jesus, what an ass-backwards group we’ve got here.”

She shook her head, not wanting to fret about it.  And if Danny was paying for dinner, she wasn’t going to complain.  “Alright, alright.  Fine, let’s hash this out on the way to food.  Luke, Danny, Devil, you’re coming with.  I’m starved.”  Jess broke from her boyfriend’s grasp and made a move to find a restaurant.

“Look, yes, Chinese food is great and we need to lay low for a while but whatever this is, I -” His train of thought was interrupted by Luke’s casual arm-slinging. He sighed. “I’ve been down this route before, and these guys do not mess around. This isn’t the kind of decision you take lightly.” He also shrugged off Luke’s grasp, and moved in the same direction as Jessica. “You bring Misty into this, you’re putting her in danger.” Matt crossed his arms. “You’re really, really risking getting dead here. Just so you can make an informed decision. I’ll come with, because it’s Christmas, but this isn’t a movie and we’re not all one big merry band of vigilantes.”

Actually, Luke was pretty sure they were, at this point, most definitely a merry band of vigilantes. All the evidence pointed that was, what with the not having police jobs or uniforms and still kicking a pile of ninja booty. But Matt looked like… actually, just then, he looked like Jessica before her tenth cup of coffee in the morning. A little sour. Luke decided nodding sagely was a good way to go. 

Also.

“Misty is a cop in New York City. She’s in danger every day. We got a chance here to make things a little bit safer for her and all the rest of them. In a not-band of vigilantes way, obviously.” He winked at Danny. Danny looked on board with the whole merry band of vigilantes thing. They were going to need a name. 

“Here we are,” he said, pushing the door open. “We’ll close the blinds, order food, and Danny can tell us about the dragons.”

Was Danny the only one still caught on the whole ‘Dad’ thing? And the fact Jessica was pregnant? He decided to file that away for later.

“Surprise?” Danny said tentatively, fixing Jessica with an awkwardly apologetic smile. “Sorry, I would’ve told you earlier, but I’m-- trying to keep a low profile. Hence the whole mask situation.” He raised the cloth in his hand as if in explanation, though his gaze strayed momentarily to Daredevil. “...Think I might be due for an upgrade, though, especially looking at this guy.”

Luke was nodding sagely at the whole ‘we’re not a team’ speech, so Danny decided copying him would be the best course of action. He caught the wink at the tail end, and figured he didn’t do too bad. 

Although he was really starting to see the benefits, though. Of a team. 

“I’m actually thinking Daredevil should tell us what he meant when he said he’s ‘been down this road before’. And I can order.” He greeted the older woman behind the counter in Chinese, extending a hand and offering a charming smile.

“Yeah, the glowing fist just screams ‘low profile’,” Jess muttered as she slipped inside the restaurant, pretending she didn’t see that wink that Luke gave to Danny.  It smelled a bit like frying oil and chili spices in here, but it would do.  Empty on a Christmas Eve, surprisingly, but Jess checked a clock on the wall and realized how late it actually was.  And a grumble in her gut reminded her that she hadn’t really eaten anything that day to begin with.

She stood back as Danny began speaking Chinese, earning a grin from the older woman.  Jess rolled her eyes somewhat, grabbing a menu and finding a table in the center of the room for them.  She sat down and put one foot up on the chair next to her, flipping open the laminate pages to take a look at the food available.

“God,” she groaned.  “I think I took a few good hits to the face- that’s gonna bruise tomorrow.  At least those ninjas had the decency not to make any low blows.” “I can sense you winking, Luke.” Matt sighed, following Jessica’s lead to move towards the table. He chose the chair opposite her, as not to engage in a ridiculous power play over the seat she had her foot resting on. Luke and Danny could contend with that issue. He was actually hungry, and for once he wouldn’t have to defrost something or attempt to contend with inaccessible websites when he’d been hit in the head multiple times. That was a good enough reason to stay. It smelt like...pork dumplings, if he guessed right. “Look, the Hand? They’re immortal fanatics, but they’re secretive and everywhere - imagine if conspiracy theories were real, essentially. Low blows? Kidnapped about 20 innocent people purely to lure me into a fight. Doesn’t matter if you’re a cop, you got super strength, bulletproof skin, you’re a...dragon guy. The Hand will still Ruin. Your. Day.”

“You know what, I don’t even think you’re blind. Ain’t no one can sense a man winking. And even if they could, you’re being creepy about it. Lighten up, Matt. We can deal with The Hand, but not on an empty stomach.”

He listed Jess’s feet and put them in his lap, patting her ankles. And looked at her stomach as if any second the first of the bump might appear. Nothing yet, but he gave her a grin. Adrenalin still coursing through his veins, and pissed off or not he was feeling pretty good. 

Matt looked deeply, deeply unimpressed by that statement.

“They’re bad guys. Very bad guys. Bad guys trip ‘emselves up eventually, one way or another. And when they do, we’ll be there. We beat them, remember? We can do it again. Is that the sesame prawn toast?”

Danny gave the owner’s small, wrinkled hand one last squeeze before returning to the table, just in time to catch Matt’s comment about The Hand. Luke was pretty blasé about the whole thing, but Danny knew a thing or two about secret ninja cults. They were way old and way dangerous, stuff nobody in their right mind ought to fuck with casually. 

(Though he supposed ‘right mind’ would not be...  precisely applicable to the people sitting around this table.)

“Immortal fanatics?” Danny probed, turning one of the chairs around and taking a seat between Matt and Luke. He’d seen magic happen firsthand - literally - but nothing like immortality. “What exactly is their objective? World domination, or something?”

Connie - the old woman who owned the restaurant - set several plates of still steaming food onto the table in front of them. Danny offered her a smile and a brief thanks. 

“Luke’s right, obviously, I just think-- it’s important to know what we’re up against,” he loaded a couple onto his plate and handed Luke the sesame prawns. “Especially if we’re talking conspiracy theory levels of crazy.”

“Tch,” Jess hissed, frowning at Matt. “I meant ‘low blows’ in the sense that no one tried to punch me in the stomach. Because that could have ended badly. But yeah, sure, they’re bastards.”  She was so not here for the talks of crazy ninja cults and apocalyptic doom to Hell’s Kitchen.

Jess put one arm over the back of her chair as Luke pulled her legs into his lap. She gave him a little wink of her own- sense that, Matt. She then heaved a tortured sigh as if this was a massive inconvenience for her as the boys talked circles around this immortal fanatic situation. It made the days she complained about dealing with cheating spouses seem like a treat.

“Up against? We? I’m not exactly making these guys a passion project of mine.” Nor was she planning to make this ‘team up’ any more than a convenient and coincidental gathering of adjacently-familiar powered people.

The investigator straightened in her seat as several steaming plates of food were set down at the table. Jess reached for her pair of chopsticks, separating the flimsy wood sticks and quickly stabbing a few fried gyoza, shaking them off onto her plate. “Luke, pass the soy sauce?”

“At the risk of having this held against me for the rest of my life, I agree with Jessica.” For a quiet life, he chose not to comment on her wink. Matt’s reticence to commit to this was warring with his desire for sesame prawn toast. He settled for grabbing some - and maybe some of those pork dumplings - and sighing deeply at the same time. “You don’t want stopping the Hand to be your New Year’s Resolution.” He also got the sense that he was going to end up on this ride anyway. He’d not known the man long, but Danny gave off a sense of being far too interested in the concept of fighting immortal ninjas. 

“That’s just about it. They’ve built crime empires over centuries, and are willing to do just about anything to keep themselves going. I’m not being creepy about it. You’re being overly lax about it. When the suit’s on, you call me Daredevil. That’s it. Not all of us can afford to be so casual with our identities.” He wanted to cross his arms, to make the point, but that would have made it somewhat difficult to eat, so he settled for sullenly squeezing a gyoza between chopsticks harder than was strictly necessary.

---

[AND THEY ALL HAD DINNER AND BECAME BEST FRIENDS AND JESS AND LUKE HAD NOTHING BUT CUTE TIMES BEFORE THEIR BABY CAME AND ALSO SOMEHOW DANNY GOT THE BABY NAMED AFTER HIM, AND MATT WAS THERE TOO BECAUSE THEY’RE ALL BEST BUDDIES FOR LIFE. XOXO THE END]

(Okay, I took some liberties with that last part.)

[drblueneck]

Massive Genderbent AU - Rookie 9 edition

Ok. I should really NOT be writing that, but that little shit of a story wouldn’t leave me alone and I couldn’t focus on my studies and I was going CRAZY. So, here. It’s written. NOW LEAVE ME ALONE BRAIN, LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!! I decided to post it, because I want people to enjoy the beauty of genderbender. This will turn into a fullfledged story. Maybe. Probably. Certainly. But not right now. Because I don’t have time. I NEED TIIIIMMMME.

As spring was in full bloom, it was time for Hideo-sensei - Head of the Academy - to peruse the new application forms for the upcoming year. Going through each of them and smiling at the familiar clan names, he took him a moment to notice the higher than normal percentage of girls being enrolled. As he took a closer look, his surprise went up a notch. The heirs of the most prominent ninja clans were to be in the same year class, and all but two were females. It had been a long time since such a thing happened! Hideo-sensei idly wondered if the girls would be up to par with the boys, and winced at the ludicrous idea of Genin teams made up mostly of kunoichi - their strength would never amount to that of their male counterparts, science said so. Or, well, science said so before Tsunade-sama gave it the finger... Hideo-sensei shook his head and snorted. Frankly, what were the chances for all these girls to end up like the legendary Sannin? Prodigies were a fluke, not the norm.

With a rueful sigh, he closed the files and signed them, already mourning for this future batch of Genin who would more likely than not bring down their forces’ strength for months, if not years - that is, if they ever graduated instead of mooning over boys like so many were wont to do in their debute... Hopefully, these kunoichi would have a wake-up call sooner than later!

Years later, looking back on this biased oversight, Hideo-sensei would berate himself for dismissing so easily what Konoha saw as its new rising stars and the best ninja of their generation.

  Shikaku stared at his ranting kid from where he was sitting under the shade of the great oak in their backyard, ears used to relentless tirades after years of mariage to his dear banshee of a wife. He loved her, really, he did, but damn if that troublesome woman didn’t turn him half-deaf in the first two months of their marital life. It’s without shame that Shikaku would readily admit to having prayed for his kid to turn out like him - lazy and fond of long stretches of silence. The Nara genes were usually strong, to the dismal of those who married into the clan, but it looked like Yoshino’s were as stubborn as her!

Troublesome woman indeed, Shikaku thought with fondness as his daughter finished her rant about ‘not being a kid anymore’ and thus demanding to be ‘trained as a real kunoichi to kick butts’. Maybe he stayed quiet for too long because she started tapping her tiny foot on the grassy ground, arms crossed as she dished out her best glare, and all that was done in a perfect imitation of her mother - and it only made her father want to laugh and squeeze her in a hug.

Which he did.

“Daaad! I’m serious!” Shikaru wailed, tugging harshly at her father’s spiky ponytail to punctuate her words.

“Yes you are,” he cooed, rubbing his scratchy beard against her chubby cheek.

“I wanna leaaarn!” She wailed again, squirming in his grasp and trying to escape his beard, struggling not to laugh and keep up her angry pout. It tickled!

Trapping her into his arms, Shikaku let himself fall down on his back, adjusting comfortably his neck so that he could watch the fluffy clouds go by.

“Maa, why couldn’t you be a lazy one just like your dad, hm?”

The child instantly stopped her useless squirming and with fire burning fiercely in her brown eyes, she hissed like an angry cat, “Cause I’m gonna beat Inoshi! He made Chou cry!”

Aaah, right. The first time he and his teammate decided to officially introduce their kids to each other when they were four, Inoichi’s boy - who lacked a brain to mouth filter - had taken one look at Chouza’s girl and pointed at her before saying with all the innocence of the world, “Daddy, look, she’s fat.” The poor Chouko had bursted into tears and clung to her father the whole day while Shikaru, true to her name, spent a good ten minutes scolding the boy before launching herself into a philosophical pamphlet of sorts on the serious issue of body image within the shinobi world. Inoshi had gaped at her, a bit pale, before hunching his shoulders and muttering a bit too belligerently, “Well, you’re definitely not cute...”

Inoichi had confided that to this day, his son still obsessively kept his hair short, traumatised by Shikaru gripping on his tiny ponytail so hard that she tore out a big clump of fine blond hair. Another of her mother’s bad habits... It was a good thing Shikaku got so used to the rough treatment that it felt like his head was made of steel, otherwise, between his two troublesome girls, he would’ve turned bald yeard ago!

Anyway, all that had been a year ago, and Shikaku had to marvel at his daughter’s ability to hold a grudge.

He hummed under his breath at another of his daughter’s whine about ‘stupid boys’ and wanting to train.

“Then you’ll be happy to know that you start the Academy next month,” he said, nonchalant, happy to stare at the powdery blue sky with the light weight of his kid securely held against his chest. Said kid abruptly sat up, pushing a bony knee into his ribs and he ‘oofed’. Kids... so uncaring...

“Really?!” she cried out as she bounced on his stomach, her almond-shaped eyes almost glittering with stars.

“Really.”

Shikaru dropped back down against him, squeezing her skinny arms around his neck with all her strength - and Shikaku was proud to say that it was actually a lot - as she smothered her excited ‘”thank yous” into his shirt, her feet kicking out in a show of unrestraint happiness and narrowly missing his jewels.

Inoshi was going down. Ha!

  It had been a long time since a masculine presence had been felt in the Inuzuka household. From as far as she could remember, Kiku had always been surrendered solely by her mom and sister and their dogs, with the occasional clansmen dropping by to check in with their Head. And if asked, Kiku would tell you that her mom was badass.

Once, she had asked where her father was and mom bristled and waved a fist in the air. “Who needs that pussy when you got me, huh?” Hana later told her that dad had left them because mom scared him. Tch, mom was right, what a scaredy-cat! Inuzuka women were the bomb!

And Kiku wanted to be just like her mother.

It actually amused Tsume greatly to see her youngest daughter following her everywhere like a lost puppy, even when she went to work in the Jounin HQ or meeting with members of the Council for clan matters. Kiku would closely watch her every move and copy them – sitting with an arm thrown on the back of a chair, legs slightly splayed out or crossed at the ankles; fingers drumming on the table when she wanted to fuck with uptight people like Hiashi or Fugaku; lips turning into a snarl when she wasn’t happy… Yep, her daughter was cute as a button in her mom-worship antics.

Tsume actually thought it was all just a phase and that her childish wonder would soon fade out, but Kiku never stopped praising her mom with starry eyes, asking stories of her missions, and more recently, pleading to start her training in the shinobi arts like Hana. She had already given Akamaru to her a few weeks ago, wanting her to acclimate herself to her life-partner, but Tsume had wanted to leave the shinobi training for a bit later to make sure the dog would be able to follow… So what to do, what to do?

Sighing over her dilemma, Tsume entered Shikaku’s office and dropped her latest report on his desk, not feeling one bit sympathetic as he groaned while glaring at the pile of reports that would soon turn into a tower. Usually, he had to hunt down his Jounin to get their reports on time, but strangely these past few days, they’d all been quite eager – gleeful even! – to complete their administrative duties…

Tsume shot him a mean smirk. “Serves you right for ditching us last week with the new recruits,” she said snidely, still peeved that heir commanding officer had disappeared for a whole afternoon and let the more seasoned shinobi drill the baby Jounin. Shikaku was way too good at hiding from them, the sneaky bastard.

“God, I’m surrounded by nagging women,” the man groaned, signing the papers he was reading with a flourish and attacking a new batch.

“Beats being surrounded by whiny men,” was Tsume’s quick retort.

Shikaku shrugged and stretched his arms, which Tsume took as her dismissal. All too happy to leave the Jounin Commander to his own suffering, she skipped to the door with a bounce to her step, only to reluctantly stop when Shikaku called out her name.

“What.” She was a busy woman, dammit.

He smiled apologetically before asking, “I was just wondering if you were putting your daughter into the Academy this year? Mine is going, and I’d be more at ease if some of the kids she knows were to attend too… Shikaru really needs to up her social game,” he added thoughtfully.

God, that man could be such a mother-hen sometimes! Tsume wondered if he would’ve been this dotting had he had a boy as laidback as him… Probably not.

“I’ve put in Kiku’s application but didn’t tell her anything yet. You know how my clan likes to keep the kids as long as possible and teach them at home before sending the little brats to schools, what with our dogs needing proper training too…”

Shikaku nodded. Many clans were like Tsume’s, enrolling the kids only for the last two or three years of the Academy as they preferred – or simply needed in some cases – to train their kekkai genkai first and foremost before even thinking about formal schooling.

“Well, if your girl is anything like you, she’s going to take to shinobi training like a fish to water,” he said in a smile, complimenting his Jounin’s ruthless efficiency on the field, and Tsume grinned back, showing her sharp teeth.

Maybe sending Kiku earlier than expected would actually be a good thing. Her girl was driven after all!

“She’s been bugging me about training her for weeks now. I think she’s ready to commit,” she mused outloud in a prideful tone.

With a wave of the hand, she turned around and leisurely walked out Shikaku’s office while calling out, “My girl’s totally gonna make you turn prematurely grey when she’ll be under your command, Nara!”

Chuckling at the muttered “troublesome” that her enhanced hearing caught, Tsume made her way back home, the grin never leaving her face. Damn right, her Kiku was going to become a kickass kunoichi!

(Shikaru means “to scold” which I found hilarious. Inoshi comes from inoshishi which means boar, Kiku means chrysanthemum because I just wanted to have some coherency between her sister and her, and Chouko means butterfly child, which is cute af. Next one should’ve Female!Sasuke, Male!Hinata, and I’m gonna have so much fun.)

[keepyourpantsongohan]

Ayesha Liveblogs Free! S1-S2

Good lord there are really only five English VAs huh 

I appreciate the level of existential dread it takes to sit in a bathtub in a bathing suit 

Apron designers I have some questions!!! Firstly: Whomst?

“Anything has magical properties if you believe hard enough” I love Nagisa

“What can I say, I’m a romantic” so what I’m gathering is that Haru and Rin were small and in love with each other

Update from one minute later: Angry with each other now, I guess? 

That’s right Haru you wear that swimsuit all day!!! But wash it bc that’s not a breathable fabric trust me you’re asking for trouble 

“You only live once so do what you want” Dghdfjghjkhkjdf I can’t believe that Amakata’s contribution to this disciplinary lecture amounts to “yolo”

Makoto really knows how to get Haru to do things he doesn’t want to do all he’s gotta do is whisper “pool” and there he is

“What is wrong with you” I hope that Haru continues to strip to reveal his swimsuit no matter where they are throughout this anime. The doctor’s office. A dog park. The mall. Pls let this be a trope

What the shit is this Arabian nights outro this is a Japanese high school swim anime lmao

There’s a joke to be made about the visual metaphor of Haru needing to quench his thirst in the ending but I’ll refrain 

How do their teachers keep finding out about their trespassing who is telling on these boys

What is Ms. Amakata’s previous job what kind of swim job could possibly be inappropriate to talk about at school

Omg Kou is so thirsty for swim boys and while I can’t really relate I appreciate her enthusiasm 

HARU’S STRIPPING AT THE FISH STORE THEY REALLY COMMITTED TO THE “I’LL SWIM ANYWHERE” TROPE I LOVE IT

“I promised myself that I’d never wear a swimsuit again” omg she was a swimsuit model

So Haru quit swimming because Rin is a sore loser? Suspect and lame

“No, come back, you’ll die!” Makoto is truly the highlight of this show and the friend Haru needs

Haru pls I’m weeping

Amakata: They might approve your request [if you win a swimming competition] 

Haru, already taking off his clothes: LET’S GET TO WORK

“He’s just like us! He’s a guy, but he’s got a girly name!” What kind of dumbass logic for deciding who joins your swim team Nagisa lmao 

“You talk about Haru a lot” Hahaha it’s bad form to bring up other people you admire when you’re flirting Nagisa, Rei is Offended™

Ffdhkdshfkhfkj he hasn’t gotten in the water yet but I’m pretty sure Rei can’t fucking swim

“That would’ve meant admitting defeat, and I’m not adept at that” okay I love Rei too this ensemble cast is so funny

Rei’s so cute omg his small and betrayed “but why” when he can’t float

Is it truly an anime without a rivalry-friendship with blatant homoerotic overtones

Oh wow that’s a weird thing for Rin’s sister to have to watch lmao

“Let the water guide you” “Could you try to be less abstract about this” I’m giggling at Haru just throwing out platitudes and hoping one sticks

“I’ll have you know that I have the constitution of a samurai” Rei you are by far the best part of this show so far

Wait a hot minute what in the hell happened in the ocean why do you have to say it like that Haru

Really if any Haru’s relationships are going to err on the side of romantic it should probably be with Makoto because they’re like actually friends and support each other lmao

I don’t know what’s wilder about this scene Makoto using his trauma to convince Haru to swim relay or the Gaze™ that follows

“You’d be the newlywed couple that gets killed in the first five minutes” HMMMM newlywed couple huh

This episode is soooo cute I love the boys bonding together in starlight

Wow was Rin’s problem with Haru just latent daddy issues all along I completely misread this situation

WAIT WAS RIN’S DAD ONE OF THE PEOPLE WHO DIED ON THE FISHERMAN’S BOAT

“It’s hard to explain, that’s just the way they are” “What’s that supposed to mean” people are gay, Rei

Why do the people on this show have such weird interpersonal relationships do you really need to hold Rin’s ankles for this conversation, Aiichiro

Regardless of her thirst Kou is really the best manager they could ask for

 “I will relish destroying you” okay calm down Swimsuit Sasuke

“This victory means I never have to swim with you again. Ever” were you not the one constantly harassing Haru for competitions???? What’s your problem Rin!!!

Haru looking at Mako like swimming has meaning again I don’t care if this is friendship or romance THAT’S LOVE BITCH

“It’s not that easy in real life huh” a weirdly realistic turn of events

Honestly Haru what a mood I never want anyone to contact me either

God could Mako and Haru’s relationship stop being the cutest in the world? This sleeping in the hallway for Haru to come home will not stand! Thanks

“Why is an amateur like that swimming with them?” BECAUSE THEY’RE NICE AND LIKE EACH OTHER, RIN

THEY WON!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I LOVE THEM

“That’s what you’re supposed to say if you arrive early for a date” IWATOBI SWIM TEAM DOUBLE DATE CONFIRMED (as if the outfits were not confirmation enough)

Gfgkfugkfg Rei is so put out Nagisa will not acknowledge his “exsquidsite” pun

This Rin/Haru/Mako dynamic could not be more like Ex-Boyfriend vs. New Boyfriend I’m wheezing 

“Hah, I’m a ninja” REI YOU’RE SO STUPID I LOVE YOU

“I hope he’s okay” Aiichiro is a better pal that Rin deserves this is such a one-sided friendship lmao

AW REI FEELS LEFT OUT OF THE MEMORIES POOR GUY

Is Rei gonna go pick a fight with Rin because I’d kind of be up for that

“I wanted to know what your feelings are towards Haru” Dad Mode Activated you will not hurt Rei’s buddies

“Don’t get in the way. If you do, I will never forgive you,” damn Rei!!! You’re not even his friend but those words packed a wallop

I like that each of these swim team boys has a friend whom they are closest to it’s nice and balanced

“Every single member of this team is irreplacable” LOVE AND SUPPORT!

I can’t tell if Rin invited Rei out to this ominous night meeting as overture of friendship or as a threat

Aiichiro get a new friend!!! You don’t deserve to be treated this way

AHHHHHHHHHHH REI YOU’RE SO GOOD “I feel the exact same way” you empathetic sweetheart <3 

WOW I do NOT approve of this Rin treats everyone like garbage for twelve straight episodes and then they reward this garbage behaviour by giving up Rei’s spot on the team just so Rin can enjoy swimming again??? Boooooo he doesn’t even go to your school

These fuckin flower petals FIND YOURSELF A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP HARU

“Come on Matsuoka!” AGAIN, way better friend than Rin deserves 

LET REI IN THE GROUP HUG HE’S THE BEST ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“Well I’m thoroughly confused” ME TOO AMAKATA!!!! HOW DID THIS SOLVE ANYTHING 

Ten seconds into this second series and Mako continues to prove he’s The Best by cuddling cats to keep them warm

“You look good” “Stop patronizing me, damn it!” Rei and Nagisa’s relationship is also really a highlight of this show

“Rin’s far from the obvious choice for Mikoshiba’s replacement” that’s valid Rei, Rin has had a lot of trouble with the concept of being a team player thus far in his Samezuka career

“Just when you thought it was safe to cosplay” it is never safe to cosplay. Just ask all those Sasukes who got arrested

LMAO AT THIS DUMBASS STRIP SHOW IN FRONT OF THEIR SCHOOL

“My triceps are guaranteed to drive you out of your mind” I’M SCREAMIN THESE YOUTHS ARE AN EMBARRASSMENT TO SOCIETY

“You really gotta stop calling me sir, just drop it okay” “Yes s-eugokay” Beautiful voice acting. Iconic

Oh god please don’t give Haru another rival one was really enough

I never thought I’d say this but that was the most wholesome kidnapping in the world

Rin saying “Life after graduation” in the same tone as one might say “Life after death” is honestly a mood

Sosuke’s only had about five seconds of screen time but I’m gonna guess he’s Rin’s Australian ex-boyfriend

Update: Just his homie from elementary school I guess that’s fair

“So this is what a nationally-ranked swimmer’s build looks like” Aiichiro pls could you check Sosuke out with a little more subtlety 

“He’s the type of rival you can become obsessed with” AHHHHH Rin has been #calledout I think I like Sosuke

Okay you’re allowed to just be friends I’m just saying that runs on the beach in the moonlight are not always the most platonic activity, Haru and Makoto 

Omg Mako’s siblings love Rei I love it!!!!!

FDdkfhkdjhf I was certain Mikoshiba’s little brother would also have the hots for Kou but it’s still funny 

You go Kou judging the muscle contest live your dream

“If you know what’s good for you, you’ll stay out of Rin’s way” Wow Sosuke that was a HARD 180 chill tf out

Omf I can’t believe it took me this long to realize that Aiichiro and Rin were roommates and it wasn’t just Aiichiro showing up in Rin’s room every night like “hey”

“Preferably ones with wonderful muscles and tight washboard abs!” “Yeah!!” Iwatobi Swim Club pls

Does this mean that the Makoto and Haru go on midnight runs bc Haru is slow as all hell on land lmao

YEAH REI’S TRACK EXPERTISE BECOMING RELEVANT AYYYYY

Omg Nagisa nudging Rei’s shoulder is fucking adorable ahhhhhh

Rei’s plans: Being sad about your personal inadequacies (what a mood)

“Do you really think I’d be dumb enough to fall prey to something so preposterously illogical as love” CALLING IT RIGHT NOW REI’S GONNA FALL IN LOVE

Lmao @ Momo checking out Rin’s cleavage this is truly the weird “all siblings have the same taste in crushes” universe

“I THINK HE MIGHT HAVE BEEN REI’S BOYFRIEND” Okay 1) This is stupid but the part of me that actually wants these shows to have a diverse spectrum of sexuality is lured in thanks I hate it, and 2) How dare you Rei’s boyfriend is Nagisa

[Makoto voice] This is a swimtervention 

AHHHHHHH EVERYBODY LOVES REI (AS THEY SHOULD)

I bet Rei’s going to train in his time off because he wants to catch to the boys <3 

Update: He’s getting Rin to teach him finally some helpful friendship times from Rin!!!! Good job

“Which do you think I’d look more swole in” omg who wrote this dialogue

Pls Sosuke don’t use this childhood joke debt as an excuse to be like “Don’t hang out with your old homies anymore”

“I need to sit on it for a little longer, that’s all”

Sosuke, internally, probably: Kiss me

“I want you to think of me as part of your team” FINALLY SOME OPEN AND HONEST COMMUNICATION ABOUT YOUR EMOTIONS

Woo woo positive character development for Rin prioritizing friendship over competition this is such a nice turn

Uh oh why is Nagisa lying about his motives for camping has he been kicked out of his house for stripping in public

I grow more and more concerned for Nagisa with every scene

“We said no and we meant it” I can’t believe that Makoto and Haru are Nagisa’s new parents wow 

Well we know who the good cop parent is, Makoto had a conversation with Nagisa and exactly one (1) second later was convinced they had to rescue him

Update from 30 seconds later: I spoke too soon he got Haru too “I’ve decided to let him stay with me” THESE NERDS

But why do you have to unbutton your shirt a little in order to negotiate Rei

“Studying became like some kind of torture” that’s depression honey

This soft glowing light while Rei tells Nagisa to follow his dreams is so sweet but also jdhkjfhkdjh what if his parents are just mean 

These boys are the definition of ride or die they’re in this empty ass pool area still trying to hide their friend behind their backs what absolute best boys are these

“Haru” “I’m sneaky” CUTE!!!! Also good call on not calling mum but on calling Trusted Adult instead

“You can’t quit. I won’t let you” AHHHH THAT’S LOVE!!! REI <3

The matching swimsuit pose god every moment of this show kills me

“We’re a team! If we can’t do it together what’s the point?” WOW I CAN’T BELIEVE MAKOTO AND HARU HAVE BEEN A TEAM LITERALLY SINCE THEY WERE BABIES! PICK UP THE PHONE AND SMELL THE HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP

“Here, dolphin’s yours” Oh!!! Makoto has also been selfless since birth he just wants Haru to be happy but Haru just wants him to be happy too 😭😭😭😭😭😭

I also like this Matsuoka siblings bonding this is what I wanted from the beginning tbh

Aiichiro you superstitious little nerd

“I want to know what it feels like to kick your ass” what a hard swerve Makoto pls 

“Congratulations, between the two of us you’re still the best in the water, how awesome is that?” “Hah, you’re so weird” I’ve never seen someone so excited to lose Makoto is truly the best boy I love this relationship 

Aw is Makoto jealous of Haru’s relationship with Rin? I 100% buy it but baby!!! You are so good there’s no need to worry

I’m so proud of the Iwatobi boys for qualifying for regionals and also I bet this means that the Samezuka boys will win relay

Update from an ep later: I was correct

“Don’t limit yourself kid” are you not... the same age as him Sosuke???

Working theory is that Makoto wants Haru to care about being scouted so they can go to the same school together and swim there

“I wonder what Haru wants to do after graduation” be a mermaid 

Sosuke really needs to get in touch with his emotions good grief

“But I am sure about one thing, I love it and I don’t want to stop” in all seriousness do people intentionally write these relationships as romantically-charged or is that just something that happens? Like this 100% reads as an allegory for discovering your sexuality

Ahhhh Makoto helping the babies I know I’ve said this a million times in the past few episodes but he’s the best boy

“I haven’t thought about [Kisumi] in who knows how long” Wow does everyone in this show have an ex-boyfriend who suddenly pops up to stir up drama bc it sure seems like it

There’s probably some symbolism in Haru handing off of a boxed lunch 

“But isn’t it... scary?” “Only til it’s not” Oh my goooood I love this swim teaching arc I love Makoto I just!!! HE’S THE BEST

Ahhhh Haru bringing Makoto’s siblings to see him at work this is disgustingly domestic and I love it 

“If he’s competing at the regional level I’m guessing that means they fixed [Sosuke’s shoulder]!” Wow Kisumi was truly just here to inspire some drama omg

Ffgkdfjjkhg this elevator stand-off it’s the Battle of Rin’s Overly Intimate Swim Partners

Oh no Haru is having an anxiety attack yikes but I get it

HARU NO AHHH THIS SUCKS COMPETITIVE SPORTS ARE SO UPSETTING 

Man this was a real traumatizing episode what the fuck Free! You lulled me into a false sense of security how dare you

“We don’t do things for each other. That’s just how we are” Ddfksdjhfkjhfd even Baby Sosuke had a lot of true processing how a friendship should work wow

“I trust him implicitly, he’ll be here” idk homies Haru’s sort of in the middle of an Anxiety Episode those don’t usually go well

“I realize it’s over for me. But before I go, I want swim the best damn relay I can. With you. Today.” Wow Sosuke finally connects with his emotions and proves himself as Good Boyfriend Material in one swing

Is it really a swim meet if Rin doesn’t have a dramatic outdoor confession of feelings with a former rival 

Samezuka you’re adorable but also a health hazard where’s your adult

MY BOYS MADE IT TO NATIONALS I’M GONNA CRY

“Look at Sosuke, being a big cheese ball” CHARACTER GROWTH

“I think I finally found what I was looking for” “Took you long enough” okay this seriously reads like an allegory for coming to terms with your sexuality Sosuke I have so many thoughts

Amakata is such a good teacher she won’t let Haru be slandered

I’m glad the boys are getting some acknowledgement but poor Haru 

“You never hear someone talk about their last summer” TITLE REFERENCE

Wooooooow Sosuke’s really here to tell Haru to keep going just for Rin’s sake this is almost the opposite of their first confrontation but it’s still   about how much Sosuke cares about Rin what kind of single-minded boyfriend antics 

“Why the hell are you so hung up on Rin” LOVE, HARU, LOVE!!

Haru methinks Makoto was about to make an important declaration quit evading your friend/future (she said, hypocritically)

[Makoto voice] Swimtervention: The Sequel

YES MAKOTO GO HELP HARU YOU KNOW HIM BEST

“Why don’t you understand that we love you” AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MAKOTO #1 BOY MOST IN TOUCH WITH HIS EMOTIONS BEST FRIEND GOOD BOYFRIEND MATERIAL BUT ALSO JUST A WONDERFUL BOY WHO WANTS HARU HAPPY

Okay okay I’m not trying to project romance onto this narrative (that’s a lie I’ve been sold on romance for a while) but like.... fireworks!!! Fireworks going off in the background while they stand in front of each other in silhouette PICK UP THE PHONE ANIMATORS

“You and Makoto had a falling out, huh?” Omg not only does Rin pinpoint Haru’s problem right away he’s also making a direct parallel to him and Sosuke’s relationship my kinda amicable exes 

“It was our first fight” I’M WHEEZING THIS IS LIKE THAT EPISODE OF FRIENDS WHERE CHANDLER EXPERIENCES FIGHTING IN A RELATIONSHIP FOR THE FIRST TIME AND HE’S LIKE ‘GUESS WE’RE BROKEN UP’ AND MONICA’S LIKE ‘???? NO?’

Am I supposed to read little Rin telling his host family that Haru had eyes that look like the ocean in a platonic way because.... buddy

God I love Rin’s Australian family they’re so sweet and understanding

Ddfalsfjdskljf EXPLAIN THIS!!!

Russell: So mate, got a girlfriend back home?

Rin: Eummm, long story, or not actually [awkward laughter]

BED SHARING TROPES OH MY GOD!! THEY ARE LEANING INTO THIS PSEUDO-ROMCOM ANGLE EXCEPT THEY’VE BOTH GOT OTHER DUDES IN THEIR LIVES LMAO WHAT WOULD MAKOTO AND SOSUKE THINK

Rin and Haru don’t even wear the same style of swimsuit so lol @ Rin bringing a different suit across the world specifically to make Haru swim in it 

OMG HARU JUST DISCOVERED HIS DREAM I LOVE IT

Aw are Haru and Makoto going to end up separated bc of their different dreams because I’m gonna be very upset

I’m so touched by Makoto’s dream of helping children even if Makoto can’t fully be in the next season because it’s a Haru-centric show I still love him so much 4ever

Hahaha at them recapping the whole show I guess they didn’t know that there would be a third season

“C’mon you two, no more tears” what sweet sobbing boys you’re pulling at my heartstrings 

“We’ll always be a team” HECK YEAH YOU WILL

Yay for Rei getting his own swim hallucination!!!! That’s my boy

Maybe the real swimtervention was inside Haru’s heart all along  😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

THEY WON AND HARU’S CRYING HE’S FINALLY LEARNING TO EXPRESS FEELINGS 1000/10 WOULD RECOMMEND 

I knew Nitori would be captain but I’m still so happy for him!!! Baby!!!

“When you decide not to be done, I’ll be waiting” Rin has seen the most character growth of anyone on this show good for him!!

“Why you gotta say my name like that, it sounds weird” I keep telling you that is the sound of love, Harukaaaa <3

I LOVE EVERY PART OF THIS MONTAGE THE FLOWER PETALS THE “I’M IN COLLEGE NOW” GLASSES ON MAKOTO THE DREAMS COMING TRUE

WAIT ARE HARU AND MAKOTO GOING TO COLLEGE TOGETHER I LOVE IT 

I SAID IT BEFORE BUT YOU WIN THIS TIME, SPORTS ANIME. YOU GOT ME. YOU GOT ME REAL GOOD.

[margridarnauds]

laz, fox, ivanova, delenn, lyta

THANKS AVERY. 

Lazare de Ga-Peyrol

overall: who? / i hate them / i dislike them / kinda wanna fight them / they’re alright / i like them / i love them / *accidentally drops thousands of pictures of them*

opinion: again, who??? / the purest bean / cinnamon roll / who knows really / sinnamon roll / the problematic fav

otp(s): *Opens up Wip* *The ghost of a dozen Ronan/Lazare WIPs come back to haunt me*

other ship(s): Ronan/Laz/Olympe is still Very Important to me, I ship Charles/Laz in terms of “Things That Happened in Laz’s Past that fucked him up badly so now he can commiserate with Olympe over unrequited crushes on the royals”. Personally, I don’t see that one as anything more than a one-sided crush that Charles took advantage of, but, like, it’s a Thing. (Also, the curtain calls for Toho are…suspect for me, given that the two of them are paired together. Could be nothing, I don’t know, and I’m trying to keep myself from asking anyone who’s seen it because I want to see the Toho with as untouched a mind as possible. I know, I know that’s funny coming from me.) 

#noromo ship(s): Laz and Solene spend most of their time together laying back and talking shit about Ronan, with Laz occasionally going to her for advice because I THINK I BROKE HIM WHAT DO I DO which then involves Solene having to reassure him that, no, Ronan’s just Like That. 

When I don’t ship Olympe/Laz (which is…..90% of the time,) I highly support them as a BROTP who routinely beard for one another at important events, bullshitting some reason for why they can’t be together while they bond over both ditching the royals for their own respective Mazurier siblings and both being repressed in different ways. Olympe isn’t as emotionally represssed as Lazare, but “Les Mots que l'on ne dit Pas” confirms that she doesn’t say a LOT of what she thinks, and Takarazuka!Olympe is obviously always restraining herself to an absolutely insane degree of politeness, especially in her interactions with Charles. Also, Lazare would at least be aware of other gay men, though I can’t feel it was something Grandpapa de Fuck encouraged, whereas the extent to which women were allowed to know about the possibility of being in a sexual relationship with another woman is...debated. Like, the rumors around Marie Antoinette really were a watershed moment there and Olympe should PROBABLY be aware of that, but...it’s dicey. It’s very dicey

Also, Papa du Puget and Laz had a father/son type of relationship, with Pierre-Francois essentially taking one look at this broken, emotionless wreck of a human being and going “OLYMPE? DID YOU SAY YOU WANTED A BROTHER?” This was sadly cut short in the Zuka version by Laz doing…that, effectively losing two people close to him with one hastily made order. 

crack ship(s): Given Laz’s relative lack of screentime, nearly ANYTHING he’s involved with is inherently a crackship. As far as “things I’ve toyed around with but generally refuse to acknowledge”: Lazare/Louis. It would put a new perspective on Laz’s devotion to the royal family and drive to protect them, and parallel even closer to Olympe’s crush on the Queen. It would also make his eventual, inevitable failure to protect the King even worse. I did toy with a one-shot for Herbert from Tanz der Vampire and Laz, where an older Laz would have to fight off the vampire’s amorous advances while on a mission from Napoleon. 

fav headcanon(s): I will die on the hill of Sugar Daddy Laz, even if Toho seems dedicated to ruining my hopes and dreams. (”BUT THE COOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAATTTTSSSSSS” I cry out into the abyss, to which they reply, “Lol, what coats?”) Like, it’s a fantastic excuse for having Ronan and Laz be in regular contact, deepening that relationship while also explaining where the fuck Ronan is sleeping every night. (And gives us Insufferable Neatnik Lazare VS………Ronan)

Also, the idea that Laz never learned Latin or Greek and that, in general, his education was constrained only to military shit, which opens him up to ridicule when he’s around other aristocrats at Versailles or whenever he’s invited to, say, a ball in Paris. (Charles in particular enjoys playing with him, because it’s a means of asserting himself even if he himself doesn’t keep up with most of it, historically having said that he couldn’t read 4 pages without being bored.)

After the Bastille, no matter what, Laz resigns from the army or is yeeted out. Like, I genuinely can’t see any real way where he sees everything he’s seen and done everything he’s done and is still in the army. I think he’d either be a good scapegoat for the violence in the streets (with a HUGE possibility of retaliative violence by the mob, especially in the immediate aftermath), or he would resign himself out of guilt and the realization that the army that he joined and devoted himself to was never going to be the same again. 

ALSO. HE IS AUTISMS. I WILL FIGHT FOR THIS ONE. 

Fox

overall: who? / i hate them / i dislike them / kinda wanna fight them / they’re alright / i like them / i love them / *accidentally drops thousands of pictures of them*

opinion: again, who??? / the purest bean / cinnamon roll / who knows really / sinnamon roll / the problematic fav

otp(s): Xanatos/Fox/Owen 

other ship(s): I could ship Elisa/Fox, especially after “Eye of the Beholder.” I’m not sure where I stand on Hyena/Fox. Like, I think there’s *potential* there, given that OH MY GOD THEY WERE CELLMATES, but it’s not a dynamic I’m particularly interested in.

#noromo ship(s): Fox/Dingo, as the two members of the Pack who were able to break free of that shit.

crack ship(s): ….I don’t think I really have any, at least for her? I’d have to rewatch Gargoyles again (oh, the pain, the pain), but yeah, I don’t think I really have any solid crackships for her. 

fav headcanon(s): She, Owen, and Xanatos are a throuple who raise Alex together, with Owen looking after Alex when the other two are away. (I mean, this verges on canon but…) 

Also, we know that canonically, Irish Mythology exists in the Gargoyles, and Fox is half Third Race, so, like…there’s some huge magnificent crossover potential there. I have mixed feelings about how she and Bres would get along, but, like…Bres has always had a soft spot for the troublemakers, and they could bond over their shared daddy issues. (Real angsty shit: His son, Ruadan, was a redhead with a penchant for theft and trickery, and seeing Fox might trigger Dad Mode in him.) Catch her and him conspiring to steal back the sword Orna from Bres’ brother Ogma to give to his old friend and ally Tethra as a birthday present. (Though he was less than pleased when Puck tried to troll HIM, Bres and Puck have DEFINITELY conspired at some point to troll the Tuatha dé and might or might not have had a brief fling before Bres met Sreng, I don’t accept constructive criticisms on this one. Puck gives him Hell on occasion for being an absolute sap for a boring Fir Bolg with no sense of humor that he’d met [1] time, Bres is thrilled when he finds out about Xanatos/Fox/Owen because it gives him so much ammunition.) 

Titania is less than pleased with the situation, Oberon is amused, and Bres doesn’t give a fuck what either of them thinks because he ran out of fucks in the 18th Century BCE. Like, c’mon, my dude’s buried the body of a freaky Grecian witch, he’s died from being poisoned by a bunch of bogstuff, he’s died multiple times, he doesn’t care WHAT the King and Queen of the Third Race think. And, of course Fox is always going to be best bros with someone who doesn’t care about what her mother thinks, this is the woman who canonically went in a ninja outfit to break into her father’s airship just to tell him she was pregnant after trying to ruin his company. That woman lied to her for years and tried to steal her son, like...No. 

The only issue would be that Xanatos and he would probably get into intricate debates on Capitalism VS Socialism at the dinner table, both of them sporting smarmy little smirks as they do so. (Puck is thrilled even if Owen stoically handles the whole situation, exchanging long-suffering looks with Sreng.) Also at some point shortly after the debacle with Orna, Alex ends up with, like, a HUGE Irish wolfhound (not a Gargoyle beast like Bronx and Boudicca, since they’re too closely associated with Cu Chulainn and, by extension, Lugh for Bres’s taste), slightly bigger than a miniature pony with red ears, golden eyes, and a crimson and gold collar of velvet, which Owen has to explain is a gift fairly given and that to refuse it might be to offend him. (Bres’ initial idea was to give a giant pig, a descendant of his prized monstrosity Babgiter before Owen talked him out of it, which his inner Puck greatly resented because having a huge pig running around Xanatos enterprises would be hilarious.) Fox routinely threatens the thing, but somehow it can often be found curled up on the couch next to her or seated next to her during chess games with Xanatos. At some point, it bites Oberon’s leg when he gets a little too pushy in his opinions on childcare, earning Fox’s eternal love and respect (and the best kibble money can buy + unlimited scratchies because he’s a Good Boi.) 

Ivanova, 

overall: who? / i hate them / i dislike them / kinda wanna fight them / they’re alright / i like them / i love them / *accidentally drops thousands of pictures of them*

opinion: again, who??? / the purest bean / cinnamon roll / who knows really / sinnamon roll / the problematic fav

otp(s): Talia/Ivanova

other ship(s): Delenn/Ivanova. 

#noromo ship(s): Sheridan/Ivanova are so good as a brother/sister team

crack ship(s): I seem to vaguely recall shipping her/Kelsey from the one ep. with Jason Ironheart but I’m too scared to go back into our pm logs to find it because I feel like that would be going into a dark, dark abyss. Also, a lot of scrolling. 

fav headcanon(s): LET HER AND TALIA LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER, DAMMIT. THEY LEFT THE AVENUE OPEN.  

Delenn, 

overall: who? / i hate them / i dislike them / kinda wanna fight them / they’re alright / i like them / i love them / *accidentally drops thousands of pictures of them*

opinion: again, who??? / the purest bean / cinnamon roll / who knows really / sinnamon roll / the problematic fav

otp(s): Delenn/Sheridan (Fuck you JMS)

other ship(s): Ivanova/Delenn

#noromo ship(s): Lennier/Delenn, unfortunately for Lennier.

crack ship(s): None that I can think of, atm? I know I’ve probably thought of at least ONE with you during one of our Cursed conversations, but none spring to mind. 

fav headcanon(s): I didn’t want to say it, but fuck I’m starved for headcanons atm because thinking machine broke. (I blame it on the terrible combo of Bres + Lazare, AKA The Long-Haired Idiots With Daddy Issues And Terrible Coping Mechanisms Club).

That band around her head that is left over from when she was more...Minbari in appearance is hella sensitive. Most of the time, in the little amount of quiet time they get, she’ll lay her head on John’s shoulder and he’ll gently rub his fingers over it as she closes her eyes in meditation, the movement roughly akin rubbing the back of a cat’s neck. During frick fracks, it’s a little bit more...intense. 

Lyta

overall: who? / i hate them / i dislike them / kinda wanna fight them / they’re alright / i like them / i love them / *accidentally drops thousands of pictures of them*

opinion: again, who??? / the purest bean / cinnamon roll / who knows really / sinnamon roll / the problematic fav

otp(s): I don’t think I really have any solid Lyta ships yet? On some level, I feel like she’s kind of, unfortunately, flown under my radar? (Which is definitely going to impact the headcanon section as well) I feel like she’s going to be one of those characters where I’m going to have to watch things over a few times. Lyta/Black leather?  

other ship(s): Lyta/G’Kar, Lyta/Kosh (I hate that this is the extent of ships I’ve got for the obvious lesbian character, but Lyta is a kinky fuck and I’m going to expose the little vorlonfucker for who she is.)

#noromo ship(s): Zack/Lyta. LET ! LYTA ! HAVE ! A ! FRIEND !

crack ship(s): Lyta/Ezri Dax from DS9. Don’t ask me why, just…trust me on this one. 

fav headcanon(s): Honestly, I don’t feel like I know her well enough to have formed anything solid for her. I have a half-baked idea that her current issues as far as feeling kind of used and alone has its roots in first  being used by Psi Corps and then by the Vorlons, being in this position where she really couldn’t ask for or receive that recognition even when she was starved for it. 

[skateofministry]

Olympian Jagger Eaton helped teach a boy with muscular dystrophy to skateboard

Jagger Eaton won a bronze medal for skateboarding at the Tokyo Olympics on Sunday, ending up being the initially American to win a medal in the sport. But the 20-year-old, who’s called after rocker Mick Jagger, was currently a hero in his home town of Mesa, Arizona, where he assisted a little kid with an unusual muscular illness feel the liberty of riding.

“Fritz was diagnosed with Duchenne muscular dystrophy at 10 months,” his mama, Sarah Krieger, informed TODAY. “It’s a rare genetic disorder, though it is not in any of our genes.”

Fritz Krieger likes to dip into the Eatons’ health club with his siblings.Courteousy Sarah Krieger

Fritz, who has 4 brother or sisters, had actually postponed turning points as a baby, and his moms and dads at first believed it was because of a food allergic reaction. But his blood work ultimately exposed “the worst thing you could read about on Google,” Krieger remembered.

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Duchenne muscular dystrophy (DMD), mainly impacting males, is progressive condition leading to muscle loss and weak point that becomes worse with time. The heart might likewise ended up being bigger, and breathing issues can establish, both of which can be lethal. There’s no recognized treatment for DMD, and it impacts 16 out of every 100,000 live births in the U.S.

The Krieger household began a not-for-profit to raise funds to discover a remedy for Duchenne muscular dystrophy.Courteousy Sarah Krieger

“Kids lose ability to walk around age 7 to 12, and then it moves into upper limbs and restricts movement of upper arms, then heart and diaphragm,” Krieger described. “Most do not survive late teens, upper 20s, though some have survived to 30.”

“We really grieved,” she included of getting the news.

The Krieger household fulfilled Eaton since his daddy, Geoff, owns a skate health club, Kids That Rip, in Mesa. And although Fritz’s physical capabilities are various for his age — his mama states he “appears like a 3-year-old,” and he runs in a different way, can just leap a bit and tiredness quickly — he still likes going to the health club and doing what his siblings do.

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Krieger stated that Kids That Rip, which has actually ninja warrior courses in addition to a skateboarding program, has ended up being a house far from house for her brood.

“It’s this big place where kids can roam free,” she included. “Jagger grew up there.”

Brothers Fritz and Hans play together at Kids That Rip.Courteousy Sarah Krieger

At initially, Krieger wasn’t sure if Fritz would have the ability to take part, discussing, “I was at a crossroads as Fritz was old enough … but to navigate that was murky.”

But she informed Fritz’s story to the Eaton household, recommending that her kid’s involvement would need to “look different,” and they invited Fritz with open arms, providing to adjust activities for him.

“They were more than generous,” Krieger remembered.

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The Kriegers began a not-for-profit called Fritz and Friends a year after Fritz’s medical diagnosis to money research study for his illness, and the Eatons and their health club have actually sponsored 2 occasions, offering 100% percent of the day’s profits to the cause.

The Olympian’s continuous existence in the health club has actually influenced her kids, too.

“Jagger was always in the gym skating and would say hi to my boys,” she stated. “We knew he was good. To watch him train and his focus, to see the commitment. He would give a high five, he was so kind and welcoming to any boy. He would use his platform to promote our events.”

Olympian Jagger Eaton and Fritz Krieger flight together at Eaton’s household’s health club in Mesa, Arizona, in 2019.Courteousy Sarah Krieger

The emphasize for Fritz was getting an opportunity to skateboard with the now-bronze medalist in late 2019. They even handled a halfpipe together, hand in hand.

“Skateboarding is not something he can do on his own,” Krieger stated. But from the search his face, he’s flying.

Naturally, the Kriegers were cheering Eaton on as he completed in Tokyo.

“It was cool to watch him on a scale like that,” she stated, including that Eaton embodies the objective of Fritz and Friends: Strength is more than muscle.

Eaton and Fritz.Courteousy Sarah Krieger

“You can be strong in so many other ways,” Krieger worried. “Jagger is making kids feel strong in a way that’s way greater than physical strength.”

“We look at Olympians, and we can praise them for their accomplishments, but more of their strength (comes) in their dedication, their kindness and the way they carry themselves. There are all these ways they are strong that we don’t see. That is true strength.”

Related:

Ronnie Koenig is an author for TODAY.com, covering the food and popular culture beats. She likewise blogs about health and health, parenting and relationships for NBC Better and TMRW x TODAY, acts as a senior editor for New Jersey Family, and adds to The New York Times and Real Simple. She is a graduate of Barnard College and a mother of twins.

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