#explanation isn't justification

[ben-talks-art]

We need to make "explain but doesn't excuse you" a more popular sentence

I was thinking back to my list of favorite characters, and how I have people like Rameses in it and thought to myself "Why do I like this guy again...?" and then I started to recall why I was so into his story, and honestly ended up liking him even more.

Something that I noticed about the way writers try to handle backstories nowadays, is that they love to use a sad past to make people be on a character's side and then proceed to absolve them of their crimes.

Like, we love redemption arcs, we love character development, we love bad guys turning good... But I feel like we might love it a bit too much, as if we were waiting to forgive a character for all they did before even getting to them realizing the mistakes they made.

People love picking a villain they're into and going "Oh, it's not their fault, it's because they were raised that way, it's because they were abused as kids, it's because they lost someone they loved, it's because society treated them like trash, it's because they never had friends, it's because their girlfriend dumped them on Christmas eve..." and so on.

There is an obsession with "My character did nothing wrong because their past justify their actions!"

And here's something people tend to forget. A past explains one's actions but doesn't justify it.

Being abused by society, being trained by terrible morals, being oppressed and attacked... they all explain why someone would think it's okay to hurt others, but doesn't actually justify them hurting others.

Just because we know why someone's doing all the things they do, doesn't make the stuff they do any less bad.

This is why I love Rameses. They show the human side of him, they show he wasn't just born evil, they show that he could have been a decent person if he just had the right people to raise him.

They could have so easily made him just a cartoon villain who happened to be born evil and take joy in making others suffer under his command, but no, they show how he became this way, how he went from just a regular kid to a tyrant unable to feel sorry for others' pain and suffering, who was so brainwashed by the traditions of his family that he couldn't even process the harm he was bringing to others and why he couldn't even see the slaves as actual people in agony.

And, again, what I like about this story is that they explain how he became this way, but they don't paint him as blameless. The story acknowledges that he has blood in his hands, even if he himself doesn't, and it makes sure that he pays for what he did, even if what he did was the result of a long process of terrible lessons being passed down by generations that he didn't start.

At some point he became an adult, he became free from his father's command, free to make his own choices, and free to listen to the right people, free to look at what his actions were causing...

He had agency for his choices... And he still made the wrong decisions.

I feel like if others tried to tell this story today, they would either have made Rameses more evil from the start so you wouldn't feel bad for the tragedy that befalls him, or they would give him some sort of realization where he thinks about the harm he did and develops a change of heart in the last second.

I keep thinking about how there was a group of people going "Azula did nothing wrong!" when the new live-action Avatar show started and they basically tried to move all the blame from her to her "big bad evil father."

It makes me wonder if they released Prince of Egypt today, if there would be some sort of revisionism where people would try to argue that Moses is the villain for "not saving his brother" or something like that.

To the point I'm beyond curious about how things are going to end up in Arcane, since that series has a very similar story with two siblings that ended up splitting apart and reuniting but realizing that they were completely different in the paths they chose to follow, with one trying to fix the errors from the past and the other embracing them and trying to view them as part of who they are.

Is Arcane gonna go all the way and make Jinx an irredeemable monster that needs to be taken down, or are they gonna try to pull a "deep down, Powder is still there!" stuff?

I really hope they don't. I hope they give her an ending similar to Rameses where he's defeated but doesn't even get the luxury to die, just left alone and powerless while watching his most beloved family member moving on with his life while he's still stuck in the past and suffering the consequences of his actions and realizing that he achieved nothing.

And what I especially like about his ending is that even at this point he still doesn't realize why he's being punished so much, just showing at full power the danger of ignorance and refusing to see what's right in front of you.

It would be a terrible tragedy, but I think it would make for a great message.

[yusuke-of-valla]

Also I think the reason like I get unreasonably upset about a watsonian explanation to a doylist critique is that like. If a writer is having trouble with their story and wants to know how to fix it by looking at what works/doesn't work in other art, a watsonian explanation doesn't. Like help.

Or like it implies that everything can be good if there's an in-universe lore justification for every element which contributes to exposition-heavy post-Cinema Sins "oh we have to make sure everything is directly explained to the audience no matter how unnatural it is" storytelling and not only is it that not always the solution it contributes to a style of storytelling I personally find really annoying so like.

Anything that contributes to it I'm instictively hostile towards.

[yourlocalxenomorph3]

it would be so cool if people could be normal and respectful about triggers when politely asked to tag them

[notasocialismjoke]

fine, i'll say my two cents.

y'all know that the explanations that matt gave as to why he banned are predstrogen aren't for us, right? saying it was because of sexual content or exploding a car with hammers, or whatever. justification is irrelevant to his actions; he's an authority; metaphorically he's an abusive parent, and one of his children talked back so he hit her.

the justification isn't for us; it's for transphobes. it's for people who have already learned a predisposition against trans people, who will listen and agree that it's justified. she broke the rules! anyone who breaks the rules gets banned, duh. it's for people who won't think twice about how many trans women have been banned, censored, etc., who won't realize that this is just the latest in a pattern of attacks because, because anyone who got censored is just an individual who broke the rules.

he's telling them what to think. his words are targeted at the people who will listen to him without second guessing them.

the rules are not there to protect us. the purpose of a system is what it does. the words of the rules are not there as an explanation of their purpose; the words are the language and justification that the oppressor uses to keep their followers loyal. the rules themselves exist to keep us in line.

the explanation is not for us; the rule is.

(this post was written by a trans woman/girlthing/whatever.)

[sometimesiship]

this, and what everybody is adding to the convo, is what character development is about. to develop character, character must go from personality point A to personality point B. the in-between is the part where you make it convincing.

characterization -> new characterization. character development.

Expanding a thought from a conversation this morning:

In general, I think "Is X out-of-character?" is not a terribly useful question for a writer. It shuts down possibility, and interesting directions you could take a character.

A better question, I believe, is "What would it take for Character to do X?" What extremity would she find herself in, where X starts to look like a good idea? What loyalties or fears leave him with X as his only option? THAT'S where a potentially interesting story lies.

In practice, I find that you can often justify much more from a character than you initially dreamed you could: some of my best stories come from "What might drive Character to do [thing he would never do]?" As long as you make it clear to the reader what the hell pushed your character to this point, you've got the seed of a compelling story on your hands.

[grimmusings]

Given the recent resurgence in purity culture and anti-villain sentiment on Tumblr, this feels like a good time to talk about censorship and bullying. This is not a call-out post for anything that's happened recently, just some commentary on what, to me, is a disturbing trend and some general guidelines for how to conduct yourself in fandom spaces.

Essentially, it boils down to this: You have the right to not interact with anything you choose in a fandom. You don't have the right to make that choice for anyone else.

Do you know why AO3 doesn't have content bans? It stems from anti-censorship beliefs and First Amendment rights, and it also comes from a long history of watching things like this go down in fandom. The thing about banning one kind of content--or that kind of mindset--is that it hardly ever stops with one thing, until fandoms are so scrubbed from anything that has the potential to be problematic that they collapse under any perceived threat to their rigid moral standards. If you doubt that, consider how it's taken less than a month for this to jump from Marvel to include other groups of villains and fandoms. Guaranteed, it will not stop there. (And that's to say nothing of how, historically, censorship leads to silencing marginalized groups, but that's a different post.) Conservatism is insidious and takes a lot of forms, but censorship is ultimately a conservative, even a fascist, action.

The fact is that what you enjoy reading or writing is actually no reflection on what kind of person you are. There's even an argument to be made that exploring darkness in fiction a) makes you a more empathetic human and, b) makes you better-equipped to handle those topics in real life (but that's another post too). I don't care what you want to write on your own blog. I don't care how controversial your muse or your ship is or if you write the darkest of dark fic out there. I may not want to write it, engage with it, or even see it on my dash, but I'll defend your right to write it.

Writing fascist characters (HYDRA, Empire, Death Eaters, etc.) doesn't make someone a Nazi any more than writing Hannibal Lecter makes them a cannibal or writing the Punisher makes them an advocate for gun violence. Saying they are breaks one of the primary tenets of roleplay: that mun does not equal muse. It's widely accepted in the roleplaying community that we don't agree with our characters' views, and we would never in a million years condone the things they do in real life. That rule doesn't go away just because you personally don't like the character.

So let's talk about what to do when you come across writing you don't agree with.

What you have a right to do: Feel however you feel about it. Ask for tags and readmores (they have a right to refuse). Decline to explain or justify why it makes you uncomfortable. Decide not to associate with people who write that thing. Blacklist. Unfollow. Block. Add to your DNI list. Vent about it in a safe space with your friends. Take a step back from the internet. Remember that the people on the other side of the screen are real, actual humans, while characters are imaginary. Embrace the fact that engaging in fiction is optional, and you can choose to stop any time you want. Trust that grown adults have the basic media literacy to understand the difference between reality and fiction. Remind yourself of the first rule of fandom, the one AO3 is built on (Don't like; don't read). Recognize that it's perfectly valid to not want to engage with something, but that expecting other people not to write it at all isn't your call to make and can lead down a dangerous path.

What you don't have a right to do: Bully or doxx other writers. Shame them for their choices when they don't agree with you. Demand explanations or justifications from them. Gaslight them into thinking nobody else will write with them if they continue to write this thing. (You don't speak for the entire fandom. You are a very small minority making a lot of noise.) Create call-out posts. Participate in witch hunts. Send anon hate or death threats. Make people feel unsafe in their own spaces. Police other people's content.

If you descend to bullying someone because you don't like what they're writing, you don't have the moral high ground. I can't believe it needs to be said, but real bullies are worse than fictional antagonists. Bullying and censorship are far more alarming threats than people who enjoy exploring dark topics in their writing. Nobody's asking you to like it, agree with it, or even look at it. And if you don't? Now is the perfect time to say nothing about it, block, and move on. Rest assured, we don't want you on our blogs any more than you want us on yours.

[liedownquisition]

I stand very firmly on the podium to state that the argument of "Bruce was going to kill Joker but he was the ambassador/Superman stopped him it's not his fault! He tried!! He even thought the Joker was dead after the helicopter exploded and fell into the ocean" is the weakest and most stupid fucking justification. As if that's the only time Bruce could have killed him. What about that time when Joker came back and Bruce beat him senseless while shouting Jason's name over and over and over and over again? What was stopping him? Who would have stopped him?

Look there was somewhere between 3-4 years in-universe between Jason's death and UtH that Bruce could have killed Joker. If you argue that he couldn't because of Tim okay well there were months in between (including the previously mentioned incident, iirc) where he could have killed him. STOP giving that excuse that trying to kill Joker is a one and done deal. You couldn't do it once now you're just stuck with it.

Look, I'm not even saying that Bruce 100% "absolutely should have killed Joker" and there's no in-universe explanation for why he didn't. I'm saying if you're going to commit to defending Bruce about this, use an argument that covers more than a singular incident despite him having multiple and frequent exposure to the bastard.

"Bruce can't kill because he has Issues/not killing, or no death at all rather, is important to Batman as a central thesis of the mask" are more valid arguments than "He tried once!!! that's why he never did it again even when he had the perfect opportunities over and over and over again and even actually resurrected Joker more than once!!!"

As if the man isn't stubborn enough to try dedicating himself to a singular purpose for long periods of time despite it being a seemingly lost cause that will never succeed....

[zeta-in-de-walls]

It's so funny to see all of Dream's manipulative and malicious tactics he's always used in dramas to be properly called out.

None of this is new. Dream loves to sound patronizing to belittle his opponents, to downplay, to put things out of context while throwing so many words and explanation and confusion that it all gets lost. Dream keeps responding because the more he says, the more chance there is that the other person will just give arguing with him because why bother and Dream can act like he has the last word.

He is so misleading. Now he's demanding evidence from anyone he interacts with while cherrypicking what he wants to respond to. Evidence does not clear up as much as you might think.

Information is beautiful. Using graphs and screenshots and making use of data to support your points is gorgeous. It's so satisfying to read a well-constructed argument.

...

Misinformation is beautiful. Using carefully selected graphs and screenshots and making selective use of data to support your points and skew the narrative is gorgeous. It's so satisfying to read a well-constructed argument. It's almost impossible to tell it apart from the real thing.

But today, Dream has gone against someone who has a lot of fans, a lot of fans who know Dream very well and who are patient enough to genuinely dissect his arguments. He lashed out at a beloved figure who's had little real drama and it's crazy how obviously weak his justifications are.

Today he's getting a lot of attention from drama but soon enough it'll pass and Dream's left with even less than he had. Hatewatching is a very temporary hit.

He even mainchanneled this stuff so his viewers who only interacted with him on youtube and barely know much about drama have been made aware. His vid isn't that damning in isolation but some of them are gonna be intrigued enough to check out responses and find out how crazy it is.

[fulcrum-021]

Wait, but the infamous "he was disarming a weapon" line in regards to Ambrosius could actually be not a justification but explanation for why Bal still trusted Ambrosius. We know from posters and propaganda that the protocol isn't to "disarm" but to kill.

"If you see something, slay something."

Ambrosius didn't follow protocol for a monster or human threat. He followed protocol for a weapon. His target wasn't Ballister but the sword, not in the sense that Ballister is in denial and making up excuses, but in the fact that he literally made use of the protocol meant for weapons, NOT living threats

[knight-a3]

Heavenbound AU

Masterpost

Vagatha "Vaggie"

I wanted to emphasize Vaggie's moth features. A friend of mine, who is a fan of the show, didn't realize that she was supposed to be a moth. When I showed her my designs, she noticed the moth themes right away. I had to explain that Vaggie was originally a moth, and that it wasn't something I came up with.

More notes under the cut

I know she says her name isn't Vagatha. But... I don't vibe with the sexual connotations. I'm too ace for it. So I'm ignoring that. I came up with a whole complicated justification for her name, but I'll get into that later.

Uniform:

Her main outfit is her hotel uniform. She and Charlie are the only staff members who bother to wear it. Alastor and Husk are never going to, and Niffty simply doesn't care.

Hair and eyes: Her hair has a more obvious moth wing pattern. Her bow is antenna instead. And she has moth fluff on her neck, wrists, and ankles. Which serves as a slight nod to one of her older design. Her short hair is also a nod to it. I never liked the floating X over her face, so I put an eyespot in her hair instead, which is always cut in half by a part. The X is exclusively on her eyepatch instead, which isn't going to be visible most of the time. And she needed a scar to go with it, which also isn't visible most of the time.

Casual:

Basically what she would've been wearing in the pilot. I just wanted to put her in an outfit that shows what she would choose to wear. I wanted to lean into the pastel colors she used to have, but also use purple instead of pink, since she seems to be associated with purple for some reason.

Battle Outfit and Wings:

I wanted her restored wings to be moth wings, rather than typical angel wings. After she regains her wings, her hair can turn into them. It leaves her with short hair, partly so I didn't have to worry about hair and wings at the same time. I primarily based her on the Condalia Silk Moth. I wanted to simplify her battle outfit slightly. I stuck with colors that were already in her palette, instead of choosing anything new. For simplicity.

Exorcist Angel:

Because I wanted the angels in general to look more human, I had to apply it to the exorcists too. Not that there was much alteration needed. But I needed a sense of consistency. I didn't like the look of the exorcists in canon. They looked too demonic with their outfits, and it didn't vibe with their self-righteous attitudes. So I chose a crusader theme instead. It felt more appropriate. The wings can "turn on and off" at will. Vaggie did it in canon after getting her wings back, so I don't see why the same can't apply to other angels. I designed the halo in a very specific way, which I'll probably get into on it's own post. It ties into how I'm reimagining the angelic hierarchy.

I think the canon lore is that the exorcists were created and named by Adam. But I don't vibe with it. I'm thinking that they were humans that either died doing something noble, or had a particular desire to fight against depravity. Consequently, they won't all be female anymore.

Human:

I wanted to base her outfit on an earlier design, and this is loosely based on a couple of her pilot design's alternate outfits. It also gives me some slightly Colombian vibes. Her hair shape is inspired by the shape of her hair in the show. Vaggie as a human name just wouldn't work. So I came up with some convoluted explanation as to why her name would evolve the way it did.

Regina "Gina" Agatha Valdez. Daughter of a Salvadorian immigrant. She wasn't interested in men, so bullies would call her "Virginia." It was a play on her name. Gina was her nickname, and placing her last initial in front would make it V. Gina. The more crass bullies called her the obvious. She died saving a child, but I haven't thought of specifics. Afterwards, she was recruited into the exorcist army. She fell because she spared a child-looking demon(probably wasn't actually a child, tbh). Once she fell, she became a demon, and her appearance changed to reflect it. She may be a fallen angel, but she's not technically an angel anymore. She's a sinner like the rest. Even if her sin wasn't really a sin. Lute cursed her to it. She didn't want to go by her old name anymore, so she went by her middle name, with her last initial in front. V. Agatha. Vagatha.

Some of the designs, besides canon, that I referenced:

(Jan 18, 2025- Changed ethnicity from Columbian to Salvadorian, that was a simple mixup on my part.)

[chuluoyi]

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐃𝐄𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐄𝐃 𝐄𝐌𝐏𝐑𝐄𝐒𝐒 . . . 𝐑𝐄𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐒 ! — untold tales

first of all, thank you so so much for those who have read the deposed empress series! i can't thank you all enough—i'm blown away with all your kind words!! <3

and so, what is this? there are actually many little details i've had in mind for this au, but i can't write them all down bc there are just too many and writing up to 9-10k isn't usually my cup of tea :') this is more or less my little notes i held onto while writing the empress series, and i don't want to discard it so with this, i'll be clearing several plot holes you might've found throughout all hail the empress, the crown of diamonds and long live the empire :D

who is the infertile one, naoya or the empress?

truth is... none of them! :D both of them are perfectly healthy, and as of why the empress couldn't conceive while she was still with naoya... well, that has a lot to do with fate and god's blessing HAHA

official explanation *cough* — the empress feels oppressed in eastern empire, naoya isn't being kind to her as of late, and actually, she has a delicate body more than most... so despite being healthy and all, that kind of environment won't support any conception 💁🏻‍♀️

hanabi's children paternity

continuing from point above... naoya is the true biological father of hanabi's daughter and son :) this is my aim since the beginning -> how ironic and pitiful is it that he casts his own flesh and blood away? the main point of zen'in naoya's arc is to obtain his own heir, and yet once he does, he stupidly has them locked and about to be punished

has naoya ever loved the empress?

no. but why was he so kind with her in the beginning, you ask? that's bc he regarded her as an equal. she was the best pick out of highborn ladies in her time, famous for her talents, pretty too, and he deemed her worthy to become his wife. but later, naoya fell out of respect with her since she couldn't produce an heir

but on the contrary, the empress was in love with him, at least during her youth

what is the argument between gojo and empress in part 2 about?

gojo has long wanted to decimate naoya and his empire (no particular justification for this, that's just what emperors do :') let's leave it at that), but it's true that seeing how the empress is wronged while she was married to naoya fuels the fire. gojo may be biased bc he is so in love with the empress, but in his eyes, it's so unacceptable

the empress is suspicious that gojo is only using her after the ending scene of part 1. and she overhears geto's words (“No, Satoru. You are just using her. You were almost there when Empress Y/N proposed that deal to marry you.”), and so she is even more convinced that he's just planning to use her so... yeah, an argument ensues :')

in gojo's pov, empress saving megumi and hanabi means she is doing it out of (lingering?) love for naoya, as he knows that she used to be in love with him. in empress' pov, gojo is finding excuse to wage a war, and with the cursed necklace incident, he has found a right justification to do so

why did naoya send the necklace as a gift to the empress after everything? what happens to it afterwards? does he know what hanabi did?

you know, actually... if it isn't obvious by now, everything naoya does in this series is unreliable :') to put it simply, he's a bit mad ever since empress ditches him for gojo—his pride is so wounded and he's becoming erratic day by day

while looking at the his coronation portrait, he might feel some kind of twisted sense of regret-like emotions (i said "-like" bc he is not right in the head), and then he remembers that he still has that necklace with him, so he might as well get rid of it. it's totally not out of love at all! :D

after hanabi tampered with the necklace and imbued it with a curse from god knows where... gojo of course has it destroyed 💁🏻‍♀️ and naoya doesn't know any of this bc this matter is not made public by the western empire (after the empress' involvement in concealing the evidence), and neither megumi or hanabi want to risk naoya's wrath so they don't bring it to his attention. more like, they don't know how he'll react, and if he throws a fit then it'll be a headache so yeah he must be kept in the dark

still, megumi resents hanabi for what she did, that's why later, he has a hand in banishing hanabi to duke kamo's household :)))

hanabi's doomed fate explained

hanabi was a former maid to the kamo household and they're famous for their cruelty. as of what they've done to her... well, you can imagine all sorts of cruel scenarios and that will be it :) things get better when choso takes over, but still... hanabi still has nightmares from it

so what happened to her? basically, gojo's line in part 3 here: "Anyone who dares to lay their hands on my empress... they have to pay the price."

working together with geto, megumi and choso, gojo orchestrated the whole dumpster fire to make naoya and hanabi fall from grace. first, he digs hanabi's background, and after knowing it, he makes a deal with choso—zen'ins have usurped the throne from the kamos and a new plaything is always welcome so he easily agrees, and then megumi... he complies bc he knows everything is in shambles in eastern empire anyway and he hates hanabi too for cursing the empress, so he helps in spreading the false information about hanabi's children not being of naoya's blood and slips choso's blood in the paternity testing naoya conducts... and yeah, they all have him fooled and hanabi is kicked out that instant

and comes the main event: naoya's stroke is also choso pulling the strings :D so in other words, this is also their plan to dethrone him altogether and install megumi to the throne. the "kindness" megumi shows hanabi is also a part of their plan, as he sends her right back to choso

in conclusion, emperor gojo is actually a cruel, cruel person :) he designs this elaborate plan to take down those who dared to touch his empress...

final note

there are many inspirations for this series if you look closer -> the manhwa remarried empress (part 1-2), queen of tears & queen charlotte: bridgerton story (part 3). i tried my best to add my own twist in all three parts, but again, writing is a form of art and we're leaning towards things that are familiar to us to write :D after all, it's just fanfics... we're free to put them in any situation ;)

it has been such a fun ride to write this series :') again, thank you so much for giving my stories a chance🩵 i never expected for so many to interact, and you all truly make my day!! if i'm going to be honest, writing here isn't always fun... but seeing your asks, comments and tags really is the reason why i'm not giving up writing here :'D and i'm saying this not for me but also on behalf of all writers out there—whenever you drop by with a long analysis/tags/comments for our fics, we're so so beyond happy to read it!!! :) so thank you, and please continue to do so if you can <3

[familyagrestefanblog]

Sorry for making yet another post about it, but I just REALLY love that they included the mystery of whether Aglae is Cerise or not, right in episode 1. With it being the same voice actress in French, but that in itself isn't a give away because Kagami, for example, shares the same voice actress, too.

But what I TRULY love about this is that it finally gives us a narrative justification for suddenly hiding away Cerise's face even though we've seen her since season 1. That has bothered me the entire time, but now with Aglae (even if she's not Cerise) I can work with this again. Cause another thing this mystery now does well is taking advantage of the new art style.

Yes, we know what Cerise looked like in the OLD art style, but we can't 100% say what her face looks like NOW, especially in the 10.000 disguises she has.

The biggest clue we have by now is that she still has the same short brown hair we saw her have at the end of season 5, which I always took as confirmation that thats how she truly looks like, since we saw her put contact lenses on her brown eyes (which you can't do when you're already wearing contact lenses), and especially because the short brown hair was the only time her hair color actually matched her eye brows.

Especially the eye brows were alongside her long (claw-like) nails the thing I thought they would now use as consistent hints for her being disguised, but I'm honestly not sure anymore since we already saw up-close in episode 2 that Cerise doesn't have her claw nails anymore in the new model (which is a shame cause I loved that detail)

BUT THEN we can kinda gather what clothes Cerise wears as her "real self", and they do go well with Aglae's style and especially the purple and dark color scheme.

Which is yet another thing with two possible explanations: Aglae IS Cerise and this was an easy enough disguise to catch in episode 1, or Aglae is NOT Cerise and her inclusion is meant to tell us design and voice wise to not go with the easiest assumptions. Both are equally valid ways for the show to take this.

I just REALLY love this right now, okay? I missed having this much fun with one of the show's mysteries.

[resident-wof-expert]

Unsorted WOF thoughts part 160:

A list of reasons why The Dangerous Gift is probably my favorite book in the mainline series and definitely my favorite book in arc 3:

We finally get to check up on Pyrrhia and see the aftermath of arc 2.

The reveal that Tundra was really just a repressed weirdo, even by IceWing standards.

Glacier's death wasn't meaningless or for shock value.

Snowfall's PTSD isn't ignored.

Snowfall gets to be dramatic as hell in ways that are as hilarious as they are sad.

Snowfall and Lynx spend literally like 80% of the book by each others' sides.

The reveal that Winter wasn't actually banished by Snowfall, and Snowfall subsequently calling him a drama queen (she's one to talk.).

The reveal that Crystal wasn't plotting anything, and was literally just hanging out in Sanctuary. (IceWing royalty just LOVES to assume the worst in their family.)

More Qinter.

It introduces Wren.

Snowfall becomes the most informed character in the series, making her pov worth reading through.

We finally get an explanation and justification for the disappearance of animus magic in a way that makes sense.

Mink.

"It was inside you all along." Played completely straight finally. I'm tired of novels that hate tropes.

The book ends with Snowfall literally smashing racism and classism to pieces with her fists.

[nysscientia]

today I am thinking about how wonderful it is that Wyll Ravengard is unquestionably Good but he also has flawed judgment

like, there are several little moments throughout the game where you can earn his approval by doing things that have consequences he would NOT want

(minor Act I spoilers) he approves when you defend Auntie Ethel from Mayrina's brothers, even though evidence is starting to stack up that she's not what she appears to be. and if you do, it starts a fight with them—with innocents who are just trying to help their sister.

OR (slightly bigger Act I spoilers) he approves if you take revenge on Kagha over Arabella's death, even if you haven't uncovered the Shadow Druid plot. and challenging her openly like that, without first calling into question her authority, causes violence to break out in the Grove—hurting many of the tieflings he's trying to protect.

this is not at all to suggest that he has "bad" judgment, because I don't think he does. it takes precious little for him to realize that Karlach isn't the monster he expected, even with lots of voices telling him that she is (Mizora, the 'Paladins of Tyr') and a perfectly reasonable justification for dismissing her own self-advocacy (devils lie). I actually think he's very discerning in a lot of situations—like his insights into Raphael and Mol. or an even more direct example (Act III spoilers): the hero's tests with Ansur, where he can just tell you the answer to all but the lanceboard puzzle. he knows what he's about! he's been making these calls on his own, in the frontiers, for seven years!

so part of why I love those moments of imperfect judgment is because I think they're an incredible window into his interiority. they come up in moments where his sense of justice has been activated—where he feels a need to protect; to face down a threat. he's a little more hasty, a lot more willing to gamble, when he feels like the safety and wellbeing of someone innocent is on the line.

and I have no reason to believe this is on Wyll's mind in those moments, but it's certainly on mine: how would his life have been different, if 7 years ago there had been someone around willing to make a foolish mistake for the chance to protect someone who might be innocent?

because when Wyll looked at Ulder, no cultists or battlefield in his wake, wrapped up in a devil and offering no explanations—

Ulder used exacting judgment to protect his city, and banish an infernal threat. he made a call that Wyll himself considers utterly reasonable.

but what if he had done something a little stupid, and gambled on his son?

... so. this post is a love letter to Wyll being the hero that he himself needed, and all the complicated ways that both hinders and helps him

[smallnico]

durge desensitizes to casual positive affection and friendship compilation

also known as real feline durge hours. esper's companions look at them and say Is Anyone Gonna Manhandle That Murderous Twink and then not wait for an answer. contexts/explanations under readmore for the curious

lae'zel and esper do morning exercises and meditation together. most of the time they pass the time in silence, but sometimes they're joined by the local wildlife. esper is a great fan of showing their friends things they might find interesting as a form of affection instead of words, especially with lae'zel, since they have a common discomfort with small talk.

esper doesn't like looking at themself in the mirror, so their makeup is always ancient and haphazardly applied, a fact that distresses the more image-conscientious shadowheart. she and esper have a sibling-like relationship fuelled by mutual amnesia and goth solidarity, among other things, but sometimes a sister has to take it upon herself to fix her stinky sibling's wings.

i already expanded on wyll and esper's dynamic a bit in this piece and i didn't feel like drawing the same thing twice, but suffice it to say, they have absolutely no idea how to talk to each other, but still look out for each other. the joke here is about how i've done a couple of long rests in-game with just alcohol i've found. hey 5 camp supplies is 5 camp supplies

jaheira unearths esper's forgotten mother issues. no real things to add here. no thoughts only cub.

gale said way back in act 1 that esper reminded him of tara, and esper isn't leaning into that on purpose per se, but as i said for lae'zel, they like getting their friends things those friends might enjoy. they also love chaos. show your evocation wizard some love by bringing him extremely destructive spells to play with. show your durge some love by casting chain lightning and letting them watch

i have no justification for this one lmao. esper isn't a Huge fan of being picked up and hefted around like a sack of oats, but maybe they should've thought of that before being small and scoop-uppable. socially, esper and halsin don't click especially well, but esper is fundamentally a creature, and therefore pretty easy for halsin to understand. obviously they don't mind that much :J

esper and karlach voted two most touch-starved nerds in faerun, they help each other cope by sleeping in a cuddle pile like cats. karlach runs warm even after getting her engine tuned up, but esper doesn't mind. she's cozy

astarion is by far the person esper is the most verbal with, probably because he's the only one who really thinks the durgeisms that slip out are funny and #relatable. everyone else errs on the side of caution with esper, but astarion knows he's allowed to take liberties with them, and he does. they have the same sense of humour. these two freaks are completely insufferable together because they're vibing so hard on a level incomprehensible to everyone around them, but astarion can put a stop to esper's self-destructive internal stress engine, and esper can drag him into helping and working hard. the others have no choice but to tolerate them as a couple because no matter how unhinged they are as a unit, they're so much worse for society on the whole as individuals. do not separate them

if you read all this, hope you enjoyed this illumination of esper's party dynamics, i love you <3 enjoy

[burnt-by-marigolds]

A (Bitter?) Taste of Power

I’m currently in Act III of my very first BG3 playthrough. I’m enjoying myself immensely in a way I didn’t foresee; I guess I had been too tired of AAA games to believe BG3 could impress me. And yet, there’s a marvel around nearly every corner of the story.

For example, the little cutscene in the flophouse between Astarion and his siblings. I almost missed it entirely, because in my party, Shadowheart has Lathander’s Blood equipped at all times, and that thing emits light. So before I even registered there were any vampire spawns in the vicinity, two mysterious NPCs – Dalyria and Petras, as I was not-so-soon going to learn – went up in a puff of blood-red smoke, even while standing behind a $#%! wall (praise our lord Lathander and his light that shines through solid obstacles). If not for Astarion’s comment, I would probably think it was just some weird glitch on the periphery of my screen.

Anyway, several in-game hours later (and some online searching) I realized I’m not going to meet them again elsewhere and if I want the cutscene, I need to go back to a way earlier save.

But I don’t regret it. The encounter was worth every bit of lost game progress.

It’s no secret Astarion has a penchant for casual violence and cruelty. Kicking squirrels, using mind control to tell others to gut themselves – he may approve of all these actions, should Tav choose to commit them. Enough sitting around – let’s go hurt someone is one of Astarion’s lines said with such playfulness it makes me chuckle every time. And yet, at least during my playthrough, I haven’t seen him act brutally outside of combat. The spawn would approve if my Tav were a bully (he isn't), but up until now, he never did anything himself.

I suppose during Act I and II Astarion is just this kind of a mean kid who likes to watch from the sidelines, hiding behind a tougher ally, and snicker quietly. He’s probably still too scared, still feeling too weak, still trying to get the hang of his new situation. At least, that’s how I imagine it.

Travelling with Tav and others empowers him, little by little. It’s a good thing in general, but there are bumps in the road. As I watched Astarion manhandle Petras, I realized what happens if the work stops halfway – if Astarion gets confident enough to act on his own, but not confident enough to understand he doesn't need to be cruel to show others his worth.

People who are truly self-assured don't need to prove this by outbursts of brutality. They can afford to show clemency. The scene with Petras and Dal shows Astarion still isn't free of Cazador’s influence, as he keeps confusing cruelty with power and power with self-worth. So he has grown enough to take action (instead of letting others handle things and watching from the sidelines), but the underlying motivation remains to avoid appearing weak. Deep inside, there's still anxiety, fear and self-loathing.

There's one more factor that plays a significant role in this scene. Astarion acts tough in front of his siblings, because now he has backup. 

You have no idea what I can do. The sun can’t harm me, Cazador can’t compel me. I don’t need to fear him anymore.

Boastful, isn’t he? So different from the time when my Tav first suggested disposing of Cazador. I still remember how Astarion snapped at Yae for not knowing what he’s saying or who he’d be facing.

But why do I get the feeling Astarion is trying to convince himself as much as he’s trying to convince others? And that he’s trying to impress his companions as much as he’s trying to intimidate Dal and Petras?

Soon enough, the façade crumbles, as Astarion starts to discuss the event with Tav. He gets defensive, he comes up with a whole range of excuses, explanations and justifications. He may even say he's capable of doing the right thing once in a while, as if he deserves a medal for not burning Petras to ash.

I think a part of him knows he overreacted. And the insistent voice in his head tells him other companions will judge him for that and abandon him. The fear finally resurfaces at the end of the dialogue:

We are a team, aren’t we? You’re still with me?

Still placing his worth in extrinsic things, like the support of his new friends. Still so scared of being alone. Remember that memory of the year spent sealed away in darkness?

This is such a potent cutscene; it gave me a lot to chew on, especially regarding headcanons and the relationship between my Tav and Astarion. Yae is no saint himself, but the display of unnecessary cruelty gives him pause. He may need time to process what happened, and temporarily keep more distance from Astarion, which the latter will – of course – read in the worst way possible. There will be misunderstandings, angst, arguments, reconciliations.

But this is a story for a different time.

⊱✿⊰

Postscript:

The date on the file tells me I've written this text over a month ago. 

But then anxiety kicked in. What if I'm wrong? I haven't even finished the game once, I have no right to join in the conversation! I know nothing, I haven't played any of the origin stories! What if there's that obscure bit of dialogue you only get by playing the game for an umpteenth time in a very specific way that sheds entirely new light on this scene? I'm not as smart/observant/articulate/whatever as others!

It took me almost six weeks to realize I can't let my anxious brain win this one. Even if I'm “wrong” (can personal interpretations and impressions really be “wrong”?), this is a testament to how much I've grown to enjoy the game and love the characters and their stories. So, if you've reached the end of this post and even read this postscript – thank you. This is an important step in my fight against the Anxious Brain.