#fatty breaking furniture

[untitledinstinct]

I cannot sit with my knees together.

My thighs are too big, and my gut pushes them apart when I'm sitting.

I always end up straddling my desk chair because my hips are so wide, and my belly pushes them apart so much.

I have to pick up my belly, and set it on top of my thighs for my to sit with my legs straight.

On the topic of my desk chair, I desperately need a new one. The hydraulics in my chair are shot. I'm over 50lbs too heavy for it.

It cannot keep me at the highest setting anymore. I have to stand up every 15-20m to let it refill with air and come back up.

I mean, all the springs in my sofa are broken too, the only thing keeping support is that it's a pull-out sofa, and there's part of a bed under it for support. My bed is also got a LOT of broken springs, and I can feel the bars across the frame supporting the mattress.

Thankfully the frame can handle about 700lbs so I don't have any fears of that breaking... yet.

[omgcatboi]

The art / the artist

( I broke my roommates couch 😭😭😭 )

[karmeneatsalot]

broke my stool while filming 🫠

[paddlescuddlesbubblesgurgles]

When her belly is bigger than the average person 🥵 

When her thigh is bigger than the average person 🥵 

When her ass is bigger than the average person 🥵 

When she’s multiple times bigger than the average person 🥵 

[gorgin-gals-muses]

Some completely unsuspicious Whoppers are left on Halara's desk, whenever they may return to find the gift.

"This city just gets stranger and stranger..." Halara sighed as they went back to their apartment, rented out a few months ago when it became clear their investigation of Kanai Ward would be an extended stay. How much did those Candy Buttons put on them? It felt hard to tell. They waddled over to the bathroom, pulling out one of the high-performance Amaterasu-brand scales. The machine beeped to life. Let's see...

"752"

"That's... 25 pounds more." Halara sighed despondently. They'd be in dire need for new, custom-fitting clothing. Might as well go to the desk to order some now. They opened their desk compartment, taking out their laptop and a few other pieces of candy they usually bought to tide work over. The obese detective sat down in the office chair, causing it to creak in protest. At least they could still fit in this. They unwrapped a chocolate-coated ball and popped it into their mouth.

"Let's see, realistically, the most cost-efficient clothing option would be to ask Desuhiko, but I still need to ship out the raw materials for him. For 8 shirts, that would be..." They prattled off a few calculations as they searched the web for shipping, letting their belly pool out and dip towards the floor. It gurgled strongly, as if somewhat ill. Most likely the leftover side effects of those buttons. Halara blinked as they felt something cool suddenly press into it.

"What's..." Halara looked down. Their belly had started expanding in all directions, pouring further and further out as it touched the floor. They tried to wiggle out of their seat, but felt the armrests now tighter against their legs. Was it happening again? The chair was now less so squeaking in protest as it was screaming in terror, Halara's fatty hips busting the armrests out and the sheer weight of their expanding form breaking the piece of furniture with a quick snap. They fell onto the ground hard, their gigantic shockwave impact causing the desk and everything on it to nearly jump. Their laptop tumbled onto their lap with a hot slap, causing them to wince. Still, they needed it.

"Hhhngggh... come on, I... I can't reach it..." Halara sputtered out huge, gaspy, frantic breaths as they tried to reach over their widening, pancake tits and rapidly doubling stomach. Meanwhile, their computer started sliding away, towards the wall. Halara watched in terror as it slid into the crack between the wall and their stomach, disappearing. They nearly screamed as they heard a muffled, sickening crunch.

"I-I.... I really can't... hffth... do anything-" Halara strained their rapidly fattening face as far as it could. They were starting to feel that familiar sensation when their clothes broke under them; but with the desk, bed, and even the walls of the bedroom instead. They gaped open-mouthed as their stomach broke the former, shredding the legs in half and sending wood splinters over the floor that their pale, doughy mountain of flab was about to flood over. Rage and horror swam through their head, but all they could do was sit back and watch half the room be demolished under them. "W-where's my phone???"

It didn't matter. It was most likely out of reach, and almost certainly destroyed at this point. Maybe the best they could hope for was to wait and wish that the assailant would make themself known. Maybe they wouldn't get that chance.

[weisco]

I love your body (Feedee/WG Encouragement)

I love what you’ve done with your body.

You have really been packing on the pounds recently, huh. It’s only natural you get as fat as you are now with how much you eat and how often you eat. You must be pretty hungry to put away all that food in your stuffed gut and ask for seconds. All of that fattening, greasy food just oozing down your gullet until it rests in your bloated gut where it all gets digested to become more fat.

You’ve practically been eating pure lard with the things you eat, sweets, sugar, fat, you gobble it all up like an obese pig. Not that there is anything wrong with being a fat hog, after all, you want to be a big fat cow, don’t you? That’s why you eat so much. That’s why you’re eating so much, probably stuffing your greedy little face right now as you’re reading this, like an obese oinker. You’re probably going to keep eating too much way past now. That’s fine, let everything go, let yourself be what you truly want to be, a massive fatty.

You want your belly to grow and grow, to develop rolls and flab, it gets so extended after a huge meal, but that’s the best part. Seeing the big, distorted belly really is amazing, feeling it with your hands, how taut it is, how much fat there is, how soft it is, how it wobbles after you shake it and wobbles for a while after you remove your hands. Just a big ball of lard to play with and enjoy. Just imaging how much bigger it will get after a meal excites you and makes you want to eat more.

So eat, eat, and eat some more, until you are morbidly obese, until you can’t see your toes, until your fat gets in the way when you move. You want that, don’t you? Not just to be a massive piggy but to eat, you love just giving in and eating whatever you want, it doesn’t matter if it’s fatty, or sugary, or filled with lard, because you like it when food is like that right? You like it when your taste buds are overwhelmed with flavor and you let that little voice in the back of your head whispering for self-consciousness go away and you fully enjoy the meal before you.

Some people might stare and point at you, see you as you become fatter and fatter, greedier and greedier for food. Let yourself forget about everyone else as your mind only focuses on one thought and that is to eat until you are a stuffed cow. Your body would be so overwhelmed with lard, your shirt would ride up on your belly, letting the whole world see how it wobbled and swayed as you walked. Your legs would get so fat that you would have to waddle, your thighs so filled with cellulite that they rub together and jiggle whenever you take a step. You’ve probably already noticed how parts of your body are soft and jiggle so easily, but imagine how much more softer you can be, how much more warmer you could be, how much your whole body will jiggle with any movement.

You would be so heavy, your fat weighing you down, it’s sort of like one big hug all over your body. The weight you would gain would probably cause a couple problems in terms of furniture and getting around. First you might break your chair, your thighs and butt spilling over the sides and back, the chair creaking until eventually it gives up on holding your enormous weight and collapses, sending you onto the floor, but you hardly feel it, the padding on your butt is just so encompassing that all you feel when you hit the ground is your massive body jiggling all around you. If you keep up this gain you’re not going to make it through doors anymore, your sides just too wide to make it through the doorway, maybe you could even get stuck and someone would have to help you get out, then you would go back to stuffing your face until you could never fit through the door again.

Your clothes would always just be a little bit too small for you, you’d keep upping the sizes and you continue to fill out the clothes and then some. You burst out of clothes, a button pops, maybe you bend over and rip your pants, always straining the seams of whatever you wear, a fat whale trying to play dress up. It doesn’t matter how many sizes you went up in a month, you don’t care that it’s getting harder to find clothes that fit, all you want to do is keep eating, and that is exactly what you should do.

Imagine how you’ll grow as you eat, your arms would be covered in fat, your hands would have little sausage fingers, it’ll be hard to do things for yourself, you’ll be completely at the mercy of someone else who will have to help keep you fed and rub your belly. You get out of breath after the shortest of trips, having to take a break even after waddling to the kitchen to get a snack. Always heavy breaths and plopping on the couch after returning from the kitchen to eat whatever fatty food your stuffing yourself with now.

You’re always hungry and always eating, and all you can do is eat an eat, devouring pounds of food and digesting it into more lard and fat on your body. I want you to eat, I want you to get so fat you can’t even imagine, I want this because I know deep down that you want that too, that you crave it. You want to get fatter, you want to eat, you want to eat until you can’t anymore. You want to eat until your fat takes up the couch and nothing fits you anymore. You want to eat because you want to be fat and full and happy. And that is exactly what you’ll be.

[brendakthedonutgirl]

Goals or Resolutions for Brenda 2023

Reach 500 lbs

Start using a scooter

Break another piece of furniture

Eat 42 donuts in a day

These are all within your reach. Do it fatty!

UNF I love these!!

[revatiu12-blog]

Preventive Measures for Orthopedic Health

Dr. Rohit Chakor a renowned Orthopedic Doctor in Kondhwa. In this article, we will delve into the topic of preventive measures for orthopedic health, focusing on the crucial aspects of exercise, diet, and lifestyle. By adopting these preventive measures, you can maintain strong bones, healthy joints, and reduce the risk of orthopedic conditions. Let’s explore the key strategies to ensure optimal orthopedic health.

Importance of Preventive Measures:

Prevention is always better than cure, and when it comes to orthopedic health, this adage holds true. By proactively taking care of your musculoskeletal system, you can minimize the chances of injuries, fractures, and degenerative conditions. Dr. Rohit Chakor, an esteemed orthopedic surgeon in Kondhwa, emphasizes the significance of adopting preventive measures to lead a healthy and active life.

Exercise for Orthopedic Health:

Regular exercise plays a vital role in strengthening muscles, enhancing flexibility, and maintaining bone density. Here are some key exercises that can promote orthopedic health:

Strength Training: Engage in weight-bearing exercises such as lifting weights or using resistance bands. These activities help build strong muscles, which support the joints and reduce the risk of injuries.

Aerobic Exercises: Activities like walking, swimming, cycling, or dancing improve cardiovascular fitness while putting minimal stress on the joints. Regular aerobic exercises promote overall health and maintain joint flexibility.

Stretching and Flexibility Exercises: Incorporate stretching exercises into your routine to enhance joint range of motion and prevent muscle stiffness. Yoga and Pilates are excellent options to improve flexibility.

Diet for Orthopedic Health:

A well-balanced diet plays a significant role in supporting bone health and preventing orthopedic conditions. Here are some essential nutrients and foods to include in your diet:

Calcium-Rich Foods: Dairy products, leafy green vegetables, fortified cereals, and tofu are excellent sources of calcium. Calcium is vital for maintaining strong bones and preventing osteoporosis.

Vitamin D: Ensure sufficient intake of vitamin D, either through sunlight exposure or dietary sources like fatty fish, egg yolks, and fortified dairy products. Vitamin D aids in calcium absorption and promotes bone health.

Omega-3 Fatty Acids: Incorporate sources of omega-3 fatty acids, such as fatty fish (salmon, mackerel), flaxseeds, chia seeds, and walnuts. These healthy fats have anti-inflammatory properties that can benefit joint health.

Antioxidant-Rich Foods: Include fruits and vegetables rich in antioxidants, such as berries, citrus fruits, broccoli, and spinach. Antioxidants help reduce inflammation and oxidative stress in the body.

Lifestyle Modifications: Certain lifestyle factors can have a profound impact on orthopedic health. Here are some valuable tips to consider:

Maintain a Healthy Weight: Excess body weight places undue stress on the joints, increasing the risk of orthopedic conditions. By maintaining a healthy weight through a balanced diet and regular exercise, you can alleviate strain on the joints and reduce the likelihood of developing joint-related problems.

Proper Posture and Body Mechanics: Practice good posture while sitting, standing, and lifting objects. Use ergonomically designed furniture and ensure correct body mechanics to prevent unnecessary strain on the musculoskeletal system.

Avoid Sedentary Habits: Prolonged sitting or a sedentary lifestyle can weaken muscles and increase the risk of orthopedic issues. Incorporate regular physical activity and take breaks from sitting to keep your muscles active and joints mobile.

Wear Appropriate Footwear: Choose comfortable, supportive footwear that fits properly. The right shoes provide cushioning and stability, reducing the risk of foot and ankle problems.

Prioritizing preventive measures for orthopedic health is paramount to leading an active and pain-free life. By following the advice of Dr. Rohit Chakor, an experienced orthopedic doctor in Kondhwa, you can take proactive steps toward maintaining strong bones, healthy joints, and overall musculoskeletal well-being. Incorporate regular exercise, a balanced diet, and healthy lifestyle habits into your routine to reduce the risk of orthopedic conditions and enjoy optimal orthopedic health. Remember, prevention is the key to a vibrant and active life!

[untitledinstinct]

I'm kinda crushing my mattress.... I've broken numerous springs, and it's saggy, and on the side I sleep on, I just noticed you can feel the bars of the bedframe under it.

My fat ass is breaking my mattress.

It crunches and pops when I'm on it every single time.

I'm gonna need a new one, and that might be able to be a suggestion for a Christmas gift....

Queen sized, needs to be fat friendly, preferably a little firm, and ideally shipped by mail. Also needs to not cost an arm and a leg. Or at least have good sales.

[aashrayhospital]

10 Daily Habits for Healthy Joints and Muscles as Explained By Our Specialist at the Best Orthopaedic Hospital in Gotri, Vadodara

Maintaining healthy joints and muscles is essential for overall well-being and longevity. Whether you’re an athlete, a fitness enthusiast, or someone looking to improve their daily mobility, adopting certain habits can make a significant difference in your joint and muscle health. According to the expert doctors at Aashray hospital, one of the best multispeciality hopsitals in Gotri, Vadodara, here are ten daily habits you can incorporate into your routine to keep your joints and muscles in top condition.

1. Stay Hydrated

Hydration is crucial for joint lubrication and muscle function. Make it a habit to drink an adequate amount of water throughout the day, especially before, during, and after physical activity. Proper hydration helps prevent stiffness and cramping in muscles and ensures that your joints remain supple.

2. Stretch Regularly

Incorporating stretching exercises into your daily routine can improve flexibility and range of motion in your joints. Spend a few minutes each morning stretching major muscle groups, focusing on areas prone to stiffness such as the neck, shoulders, hips, and lower back. Experts from the best orthopaedic hospital in Gotri, Vadodara recommend stretching as it can help in alleviating tension and reduce the risk of injury during physical activities.

3. Maintain Proper Posture

Poor posture can put unnecessary strain on your joints and muscles, leading to discomfort and pain over time. Practice sitting and standing with proper alignment, keeping your spine straight and shoulders relaxed. Investing in ergonomic furniture and adjusting your workspace setup can also help maintain good posture throughout the day.

4. Eat a Balanced Diet

Nutrition plays a crucial role in supporting joint and muscle health. Incorporate a variety of nutrient-rich foods into your diet, including fruits, vegetables, lean proteins, and healthy fats. The best joint replacement surgeons in Gotri, Vadodara suggest incorporating foods high in omega-3 fatty acids, such as salmon and walnuts, to help reduce inflammation in the body, while vitamin D and calcium to support bone strength and density.

5. Engage in Regular Exercise

Physical activity is essential for maintaining strong muscles and healthy joints. Aim for a combination of cardiovascular exercise, strength training, and flexibility exercises to keep your body strong and mobile. Choose activities that you enjoy and vary your routine to prevent overuse injuries.

6. Get Adequate Rest

Rest and recovery are crucial for muscle repair and growth. Make sure to prioritize sleep and aim for 7–9 hours of quality sleep each night. Listen to your body and allow for rest days between intense workouts to prevent overtraining and reduce the risk of injury.

7. Practice Mindfulness

Stress can exacerbate muscle tension and contribute to joint pain. Incorporate stress-reducing practices such as meditation, deep breathing exercises, or yoga into your daily routine to promote relaxation and ease muscle tension. Mindfulness techniques can also help improve body awareness and reduce the likelihood of engaging in habits that strain your joints.

8. Maintain a Healthy Weight

Excess weight can put added stress on your joints, particularly in weight-bearing areas such as the knees and hips. Adopting a healthy eating plan and engaging in regular physical activity can help you achieve and maintain a healthy weight, reducing the risk of joint pain and inflammation.

9. Stay Active Throughout the Day

Prolonged periods of sitting or inactivity can contribute to muscle stiffness and joint discomfort. We at Aashray hospital, being one of the best orthopaedic hospitals in Gotri Vadodara, advise our pateints to take breaks throughout the day to stretch, walk around, or engage in light physical activity. Incorporating movement into your daily routine can help prevent stiffness and improve circulation to your joints and muscles.

10. Listen to Your Body

Pay attention to signals from your body and adjust your activities accordingly. If you experience pain or discomfort during exercise, modify the intensity or technique to avoid further injury. Ignoring pain signals can lead to overuse injuries and long-term damage to your joints and muscles.

Even though you’ve had the best joint replacement surgery in Gotri, Vadodara, it is necessary to incorporate these ten habits into your daily routine since it can help promote healthy joints and muscles, allowing you to move with ease and enjoy an active lifestyle. Remember that consistency and small changes can lead to significant improvements over time. Prioritize self-care and make your joint and muscle health a priority for lifelong mobility and vitality.

[cherryblossomsandapplepi]

Recently the bottom of my chair cracked cause I’m too damn heavy, chances are you could help me break it the rest of the way?

The chances are definitely high, why don’t you keep eating like a good little piggy until it collapses under you like the heavy piggy you are. Bonus points if you’re mid meal when it shatters below your fat ass piggy.

[lordofthelard]

Fatty vs. furniture

Stage 1: Bending and creaking

Stage 2: Squeezing in or overflowing

Stage 3: Not fitting in or breaking after attempt to fit in

Stage 4: Reinforced custom jobs only

Stage 5: No more furniture necessary except bariatric bed or mattress on the floor

Which stage are you at?

[eggluttony]

Has Casino ever sat on the couch and actually broke it😳

Heheh oh yeah, I think the first time would definitely be on one of Boom Eggman's couches, if he kept one of his old ones even after he'd upgraded other furniture just because he wanted to enjoy watching his boyfriends get way too big for it over time. Whether part of why it breaks is due to him and modern both wearing it down over time or not, Casino Egg eventually becomes too heavy for it and one day it collapses under the crushing weight of his big fat ass and belly that have grown so much. The couch was designed for a way smaller and lighter man like Boom Eggman and not a big fatty like him so it was already too small from the start but he wasn't expecting to ever actually break the thing. That day he didn't even realize that the loud creaks were a cause for concern when he leaned back in it and enjoyed a few snacks until the wooden legs abruptly snapped and it crashed to the floor.

He was very shocked, heart racing and breaths heavy from the shock and he hoped Boom wouldn't be mad. He just grinned and blushed like "Uhh hey darling, I broke your couch... Isn't that sexy?" That's one of those moments where it really hit Boom, when he looked to see his boyfriend with all his soft squishy fat taking up so much space as he sinks deep into the worn down cushions of the couch that now has broken legs after it couldn't handle the heft of his fat belly and ass anymore. He really realizes how much fatter he's getting with this, as if he wasn't already alarmingly huge when they met. And so much of it is thanks to Boom constantly keeping his mouth and belly full way too much and way too often. He's really helped him become the constantly stuffed very big and heavy fatass of his dreams and the consequences are starting to show.

But it's very different from the early days of Boom being more fussed about even just the cushions possibly being worn. Now he just teasingly huffs and tuts as he tells Casino Egg he's getting way too fat and heavy and should be embarrassed for ruining his lovely couch. But they smirk at each other because they know they both love this and it's an impressive milestone. So after Boom helps him up to the best of his ability, though really it's him and his cane that has to do the work, he gives him kisses and says "You're right, that was sexy." and gets him somewhere more comfortable to sit and enjoy his next meal, which he makes bigger along with extra dessert to celebrate heheh. He just keeps on feeding him well because he's still got a way to go before he's as fat as he wants! 💜

Then when he gets somewhere quite near his current highest set weight for him of around 550 lbs, he'd definitely start breaking the couches in the lounge rooms of his casinos, even though he had them specially ordered to be much more sturdy for a bigger heavier guy like him to sit on. But he's become much heavier than that over the years and it becomes too much! That's even more embarrassing when it happens in a busy place, when the sound of breaking wood and a crash turns peoples heads. But then he gets a little rush of excitement with all that attention on him and the damage he just did to that big sturdy couch and how they're all definitely appalled, thinking that he's such a big fatass. As if they didn't already think that just by seeing how much space he takes up because he's way too big and wide!

Those moments where all his fat is spilling over his very wide waistband and spreading as he's sat on the broken couch are so shocking and so pleasurable that it gives him such a thrill. He's left a little shaken but also woozy from the undeniable pleasure of knowing his fat heavy body is capable of breaking something that multiple people can sit on together, all by himself. People think man, this guy really is massive, he's seriously getting way too big and heavy. He may seem oblivious but they don't know he tells himself that too but it only fills him with great pride and pleasure. He loves getting too fat for furniture, it's getting pretty extreme and he couldn't be happier... Unless he gets even bigger and heavier! 🥰🤤💜💖💕💘

[magma-cjay]

I made some La Squadra headcanons... hope you enjoy :^)

Risotto Nero

Age: 28

Ethnicity: Sicilian/Egyptian (born in Sicily)

Sexuality: Gay (more closeted/probably doesn't realise)

General headcanons:

- He has Autism, fidgets with smaller objects he keeps in his pockets like pens or keys to help calm him down. When fidgeting with a pen on his desk he can take it apart and put it back together again.

- Social interaction? How do you do that? (Is mostly more talkative around the people he's close to, aka his team. Though usually performs better when it's only atleast 3 or less of them in the same room with him).

- Him and Formaggio are the closest in the group. BFF's! They'd go out and try and find some cats in the alley ways. Ghiaccio is his second closest next to Melone

- He likes animals, alot. Will protect or rescue one if he sees them around or on a mission

- The father figure for La Squadra, and if he sees one of his members in distress he'll do anything he can to help calm them down/soothe them.

- Doesn't get drunk. Period. I think we know why.

- Enjoys the sun, is able to stand in it longer than Illuso or Ghiaccio due to him more able to tan than get sunburnt.

- When he isn't showing off his torso, he prefers warm snuggly jumpers or hoodies. Makes him feel safe and has the same affect as receiving a hug for him.

- Has a few plushies, small bean filled cats and probably a moderately huggable sized bear. Holds it at night while he sleeps

- He'd eat spicy stuff without a blink of an eye. His mama used to make him alot of Mediterranean/Eastern foods like Indian and Egyptian. So he has a hefty tolerance to spice

- Will bite into a lemon. With 0 hesitation. And just eat it as if it were a regular not acidy fruit.

- Doesn't cry much, but when he does he's an ugly crier. Snot and tears running down that man's face, probably clenches his fist or punches something to. Depends on the situation of course.

- Enjoys the bitter taste of Dark chocolate, will eat a whole block of the kitchen made stuff with ease.

- Can lift everyone but Pesci and Illuso as if they were as light as a feather. Pesci and Illuso are a tad more heavier.

- His linguistic skills outside of Sicilian and mainland Italian suck. He's got horrendous English compared to the rest of the group. Relies on Ghiaccio to translate whatever they are saying.

Ghiaccio

Age: 20

Ethnicity: Venezian

Sexuality: Gay/Ace

General headcanons:

- Has ADHD. No doubt.

- Sees Risotto as a father figure, looks up to him for guidance and listens to him the most.

- Got his curly blue hair from his stand awakening! It was a slow process. Risotto checks on it every so often because the more blue and curly it gets, the more powerful his stand becomes.

- Other than Risotto, the closest member in his squad is Melone! They get along the best in the group. They have similar intellect and both like to learn about eachothers passions! (Without it getting sexual of course)

- His insults? No rapper could ever compare to the zany things this gremlin comes up with! He'll slaughter you with his words and his stand!

- Can speak multiple languages! The best at English other than Melone, Formaggio and Pesci in the group! Hates it when people pronounce things wrong (wow, that was obvious) and also hates slang. It gets on his gears when Formaggio uses it.

- Loves cats! They calm him down! He doesn't want to hurt the little critters! Unfortunetly too shy to go out and actively find them, but will promptly beat the ever loving fuck out of you if you hurt a cat in his vision.

- Doesn't let anyone but Melone, Pesci and Risotto touch his curls. You will be frozen if you aren't them.

- Enjoys crunching on Ice cubes, the sound is satisfying and he finds the taste nice.

- Hates asparagus and avoids it like the plague, same with Coriander. It tastes like soap! Ew!

- Has warm showers to balance out his stand that makes him colder than the average person. Won't turn it up too high otherwise he burns.

- Burns easy in the sun, wears alot of sunscreen.

- The lightest member of La Squadra after Melone! Will scream if you pick him up.

- He has muscular thighs and has a light 4 pack! Skating does alot for you!

Melone

Age: 26

Ethnicity: Naples

Sexuality: Pansexual

General headcanons:

- Has sleep paralysis.

- Got a degree in human genetics & Biology!

- Is a maternal figure to his Juniors and would definetly be capable of caring for a baby.

- Will drape himself over Risotto, the man doesn't care how. As long as he isn't doing any weird shit. And Melone will gladly go with those terms.

- Calls Risotto "Rizzy babe/baby" and it drives Ghiaccio and Prosciutto into the wall. Be professional damnit Mel!

- Him and Prosciutto are fairly close, they get along well with only a few minor differences in views. He and Illuso have a stronger bond however.

- Isn't as sexually driven as he seems. Tells Ghiaccio alot of 'apparently' devious things he's done but in all honesty? He isn't that bad. The only thing that's relatively "disgusting" is him being into legs and feet. Other than that? He just knows too much and puts on a persona to see how creeped out other people get.

- Knows everyone's star signs, blood types, DNA and allergies! Puts all the information down on BabyFace.

- BabyFace is basically his own personal laptop, he can play games and hack into servers when he pleases!

- Created most of La Squadra's furniture... with BabyFace. Risotto, Ghiaccio and Illuso are the only three that know that he created it with BabyFace. Ris and Mel are the only ones who knows what people are what furniture. Melone occasionally says hi to them when the others aren't around.

- Melone also has a weird amount of knowledge on dogs. He'll tell you almost everything about a breeds behaviours and traits, to even what is best to give them from toys to food!

- Likes eating Formaggios bags of chips when he isn't looking. He just finds those fatty crispy potatoes in a bag so utterly irresistible!

Prosciutto

Age: 35

Ethnicity: Milan

Sexuality: Bisexual

General headcanons;

- Trans! F-M

- Him and his mother look very similar to eachother. Even more when he was pre transition!

- Smokes cigars.

- Takes like 20 minutes doing up his hair.

- Buys fine wine, won't take the cheap shit.

- He spends daddy's money. But the team doesn't have to know that.

- Enjoys sitting in the sun with a nice glass of wine with olives, hates it when he's disturbed.

- Has some toxic masculinity, doesn't want to look 'weak' infront of the team, or at all.

- Nutures Pesci, the two are very very close. Not brothers, but close. You will not enjoy the wrath of Prosciutto if Pesci is hurt.

- Does the face rubbing with everyone. Wants to make sure everyone can succeed at their task!

- Him and Illuso are, close? They tease eachother in a friendly way, love finding ways to make the other flustered or embarresed. It's a very fun game to them.

- Is probably the 2nd best at using a gun. No one can top the sniper that is Gelato however. But he is learning from him.

- Do not. Mess with his suits. The minute he finds out someone has wrinkled or spilled his suits you will be turned into an old hag. Most of the team knows this. But there's still the oddballs who don't learn...

- Reacts like a normal person to unusual bizarre situations. Who put this inflatable pool into the base? GET IT OUT! STOP SWIMMING IN IT!

- Doesn't like cats, they get hair all over his clothes and vomits up cat treats on his bed. But Illuso and Melone can tell that he himself acts somewhat similar to a cat. Just exclude the puking.

Pesci

Age: 20

Ethnicity: Sardegna

Sexuality: Straight

General Headcanons;

- Him, Gelato and Sorbet? Good friends. BFF's even.

- Is shy, doesn't do well in social situations. But you can tell alot more easier than you could with Risotto

- Enjoys fishing in the coastal waters. Will occasionally go out with Formaggio and Illuso to fish with them.

- The others have tried to show him new drinks, but he'll always stick to milk. It's what his momma gave him when he was younger, a habit he has yet to break.

- His momma was very over protective, unfortunetly causing him to be very anxious and paranoid about many things. It's a surprise he even managed to join the Mafia.

- Likes dogs! Him and Mel can talk about dogs for hours! Even visit some at shelters. Only wishing they could adopt only to remember they're professions..

- Does pedicures with Sorbet and Gelato every weekend. He makes sure to keep his nails in good condition for them! And they do the same! Sometimes they do makeovers with eachother, he likes looking fabulous on the next mission!

- Likes kids but is terrified to go up to them. But whenever it's him and Risotto, he has a little more confidence. The two wouldn't mind ever giving the homeless children some food or a piggy back ride.

- Is allergic to walnuts. He found that out from a pie Melone made him. Thankfully he came out okay thanks to BabyFace.

- He does indeed hide behind the couch whenever they watch a horror movie. Thankfully Risotto is there with him whenever they do watch them, the man apparently doesn't really enjoy them either. He isn't scared, but he just prefers other genres.

- Is only good at some English due to all the tourists! He felt like he had to learn some so he'd be able to talk to them or help them out with directions.

Illuso

Age: 26

Ethnicity: Spainish

Sexuality: Bisexual

General Headcanons;

- Pillow princess!

- Don't disturb him when he's in the tub, just don't.

- He can sing! He's very loud! But usually sings when no one Is home. Prosciutto and Melone are the only two that have heard his singing voice.

- Teases members of the team constantly, he's just alot meaner with Formaggio.

- Made his outfit! Formaggio and Sorbet absolutely hate it! But he doesn't care about the haters

- He has full control of his pigtails, no one knows how he is able to make them magically float. But that makes it even more fun! They usually start to squirm when he's excited, flustered or scared.

- Is always in his mirrors. Likes the quiet inside, but sometimes he'll get lonely and pop out or ask some of the others to join him inside.

- He's relatively good at cooking, mainly Spanish cuisine. But is learning with Melone how to make baked goods!

- Him and Mel watch TV together, they love making fun of the characters and getting deeply invested into the plot. They binge alot.

- Isn't a snacker, he will only eat snacks if he's watching TV or if he's in the tub. Those are usually grapes.

- He doesn't hate Formaggio. They are quite close! Just thinks some of the things he does and says are absolutely stupid.

- Knows almost everything history wise with his teammates. But still can't find much on Risotto.. one day he will... one day... only knows some of his info from Melones BabyFace. But that's not enough!

- Invades his teammates privacy, he'll pop through the mirrors in they're rooms. No he doesn't care (atleast most of the time)

Formaggio

Age: 27

Ethnicity: Boston

Sexuality: Bicurious

General Headcanons;

- He has a pet name for everyone, most of them don't mind. Gelato and Ghiaccio absolutely hate theirs however.

- Of course as we know in canon, he's the brother of the group. Tries to cheer them up after a particularly glum mission, or if they are just having a bad day.

- Loves cats. Ain't good at taking care of them. Risotto gets annoyed whenever he leaves cats in containers.

- He snacks, alot. Like alot alot. Thankfully he exercises with Sorbet so he maintains his frame.

- Loves pissing off Illuso with the way he eats Spanish food. A disgrace for eating Doritos with Guacamole! But man it's fun to see his face go red! And it tastes good.

- Has the strangest ideas for how to defeat targets. Goes into Risotto's office constantly and babbles on about ideas. Most of the time they are surprisingly accepted. And they work!

- Happily drinks cheap booze, it disgusts Prosciutto. But he doesn't care. Unfortunetly gets drunk after 5 bottles. Doesn't drink infront of Risotto though (atleast not on purpose).

- He loves the beach! Hot babes (and bros?) walking around, it's a paradise for this cheese man! Has to be taken away from the beach by force when they have to go home though.

- Usually wears very loose clothing. He gets too hot easy! Gotta wear something he can breathe in.

- Likes orange chocolate, some of the others judge him for it. But him and Sorbet can snack on that stuff for hours.

- Likes listening to the game on the radio in Ghiaccios car since Illuso and Melone take up the tv too often.

- Is from Boston, so of course he knows English. Sometimes swears in it, but he mainly speaks in Italian now. Knows some Sicilian thanks to Risotto!

[sh1tbird-shantytown]

original post/idea came from @memes-saved-me

and thank you for encouraging me to write it! i had lots of fun <3

———

Steve Harrington’s parents weren’t around often. People knew that, they were aware. Now, they weren’t home much, yes, but they weren’t not home enough for it to be a worrying case of neglect. They still called in, had the neighbor keep tabs, and came home at least three times a month.

When you asked Steve about his family he’d simply shrug his shoulders and tell you that his father had a firm in the city. When someone asked Mr. and Mrs. Harrington about their son they’d wave a hand and mention how ‘he’s just on his way to graduating’ and then change the subject. Was Steve Harrington the perfect son? Maybe not. Were the senior Harrington’s good parents to begin with? Debatable. But they had something close to functional. They digress.

And so, as children who didn’t have prominent leaders in their life usually turn out, Steve was a lost cause when it came to actually living on his own. He had the money for food and his parents kept up with the bills. But he was horrendous when it came to actually keeping the house up to shape.

Until he had to figure it out to save his own ass.

The first instance was messy.

His first party had been wild. Junior year. Half his grade and then some had shown up. He’d gone all out. The long, fancy dining table had been loaded with foods all fatty and desirable. Kegs had been placed outside for peoples free flow. The expensive stereo which had been installed that spring blasted music from a collection of mixtapes. And by the end of the night, the party had been raging. Raging as in fights broke out, people got reckless, everyone started getting destructive.

That was when Steve regretted not having a plan, he was too sober to just let it go and deal with it in the morning. He knew that wasn’t a good idea. Multiple things happened all at once. Someone dragged a keg in from the backyard, too drunk to find the strength to carry it. And apparently too deaf to hear it scratch up the maple wood floorboards. Then, two seniors bashed their heads into the wall. Successfully denting two very noticeable holes in the drywall. But, oh, that wasn’t all the destruction. Some junior (Steve vaguely registered his name as Jake) was thrown into the wall, actively also breaking a shelf there too.

He had turned off the music and then clanged pots together to get them all out. It worked. A little surprisingly.

And then he’d been left with a damaged house to deal with.

He picked up all the litter both indoors and outdoors, put the little leftover food into the fridge, vacuumed, and then went to bed in exhaustion.

===

The next day he’d then been overwhelmed with many worries over the destruction caused to his home. He was just thankful it had been Saturday. He had the weekend to figure this shit out. He went around the house and made a list of everything that needed repair.

1.) The floor

2.) The holes in the walls

3.) That shelf (REPLACEMENT)

4.) The table

Oh yes, the table. His family’s long, fancy table had an abundant number of scratches engraved into it. Something no amount of waxing could fix.

His first thought was to look for all the tools his prestigious father had to offer. So, he looked everywhere. The basement, the attic, the closets, the offices, the shed. And he did find some. A hammer, two screwdrivers with different points, a tape measure, a wrench, a measuring level, and exactly 28 screws. But even that wasn’t enough and he knew. Next stop was the local hardware store.

Mr. Jimmy was the local handyman and he was nice enough to everyone. But not so much to the Harrington’s.

“What’re you doing here, boy? You know, son,” Jimmy’s neglected beard rustled when he spoke and his shop smelled of anchovies and cheese doodles. “I used to know yer Mama. Back in the day. She was a purdy thing, that woman.” He sighed something fond, “I miss that there woman. She’s not the same. Barely see her nowadays.” Steve was used to Mr. Jimmy’s delays, wasn’t subsided too much.

“Hey, Mr. Jimmy,” he stepped through the threshold of the old shop. “I’m looking for some tools today. Think you could help me?”

Mr. Jimmy regarded him with squinted eyes, “You using yer Daddy’s money?”

Steve blinked, “Yeah?” Mr. Jimmy folded his arms impassively. He had obvious tan lines that peaked out through his sleeveless shirt. Skin red over age.

“I don’t want no money from that bastard’s account!”

“But—“

“I’ll have none of it,” the bulky man stepped forward and Steve’s back hit the cold glass door.

“But, Mr. Jimmy, you’d be taking from him. Wouldn’t that be better than just letting him keep all that money for himself?” Steve reasoned. Adding the suggestive and innocent lilt to his tone, worked his bystander charm.

The scornful eyes grew with joy, “Why—“ he laughed suddenly, loud and invasive just as he was. “You’re a rotten little junior, aren’t yeh!” he galloped over to his counter with the same joyous lilt. Steve stood still in case the man swerved into another decision. He watched as Mr. Jimmy himself walked around his shelves, searching. “What kinda stuff you lookin for anyways?”

Steve struggled to find his voice, “Er- Uhm- Hah. W—Well I have to replace some wood flooring, fix a scratched table, replace a shelf, and patch up some holes in the wall?” He received a raised eyebrow before the man started hurriedly piling supplies throughout the shop into the counter by the cash register. Steve didn’t even want to think about how much it would cost. Although, if he thought about it, replacing everything and then paying someone else to do it all was probably more of a hole. Sure, the emergency cash that had added up over time would be gone, but at least he wouldn’t be disowned for the ruined furniture.

“That’ll be $78.75,” Mr. Jimmy pressed some buttons and Steve startled a little when the loud clang of it opening echoed. He pulled out his wallet anyway and dug around for the cash. He handed over four twenties only a smidge reluctantly.

Mr. Jimmy was giddy at least, “This here money will do me some good,” he nodded to himself as he stored the greens away and started packing the supplies in tightly within big paper bags.

“I’m sure my father will miss it,” Steve fibbed, “Keep the change.” And carried the three hefty loads up and out the door.

===

He had Queen playing the speakers and a crow bar in hand. What he was supposed to do now that he supposedly had all of the materials was a toss up to him. But he had to try.

He got down on all fours and began prying between the first ruined board and one of the unscarred ones. It lifted with a creak and he watched it carefully as he moved the bar up and down repeatedly. At one point it didn’t peel off any more and so he went side to side with it. Still nothing. He tried to push forward but there was too much resistance.

“What the hell? Come on you pathetic piece of wood!” he muttered exasperatedly. He pulled back a little and then slammed the bar back under the board. There was a sharp snapping sound that made him freeze. But the board was unstuck. And, oh would you look at that. He was unceremoniously proud. The floor board popped off. He saw that there was some dried up white lines underneath. He decided that it looked like that stuff in the bottle labeled ‘liquid nail’ and placed the board to the side.

He spent the rest of the late morning tearing up floorboards. By the time a late lunch break was approaching, he had accomplished removing all the damaged floor. He went into the kitchen to wash his hands quick before calling for a pizza when he realized the water accumulation in the sink. And it wouldn’t go down.

“Okay!” he cried in frustration, “What the actual hell now?” He got down again and opened the cupboard doors to the pipes coming down from the sink. There were steel pipes that started from the sink and curved around down into the bottom of the cabinet. There were rings that Steve assumed connected them. So to see what was backing up the sink he’d have to unscrew a couple. Right? He got up and dusted his pants off (a lost cause by this point) and went over to the pile of tools by the front door.

He grabbed a wrench, or at least what looked like one the plumber had used when he’d visited once or twice when Steve was a kid. It took him a minute but he finally loosened the mouth of it and fitted the groves over the ring of the pipe. He twisted and some water started dropping down. It started making a puddle so he hurried and grabbed a pot, placing it right underneath. He twisted again and again and again.

He sputtered as some sprayed into his face, “Awe hell! Disgusting!” but he kept twisting anyway.

Eventually it came off. But the water was quickly overflowing. Not to mention rancid. He yelped in shock and ran all around the kitchen trying to find more bowls. He found one, a china bowl that was his mother’s great aunt’s. He yelled out as he saw the grey water streaming down onto the kitchen floor at that point. He ran back and held the fancy ceramic serving bowl up to the open pipe. He sighed in relief as it worked and when it stopped, finally, just barely brimming the bowl, he saw tons of little pieces of orange.

“Who the hell put orange peels in my sink?” he muttered as he carefully waddled out to the back yard. It was cold out and he didn’t have shoes nor socks on. He jogged on his toes all the way back to the tree line and tossed the gross contents into the bushes there. He ran back shivering with a tight hold onto the rim of the china bowl. When inside he set it on the counter and fluttered about gathering towels. He mopped up the rest of the water mess and went to turn on the sink to check his work.

“Wait!” he jumped down in panic just as he turned the water on and off in the same second. The water inevitably dripped down through the open pipe but it was only a little. He leaned his head tiredly against the open cupboard door, face sweaty and hairline damp. He took the wrench and attached the rings back on snugly. Then, he turned the water on with a quick flick at the knob. He laughed happily as nothing leaked and the water trickled down without blockage. He leaned back against the counter and panted as the slight adrenaline rush flowed away.

===

Some time later he figured that he should probably work on the holes in the wall. He had some sort of paper roll made of one thick strip and a big bucket of smooth and pale mud textured stuff. He took the wide spatula thing that Mr. Jimmy had instructed of him to use and stared at the two dents in the white accent wall.

“Ummm,” Steve looked from his full hands, roll of paper stuff around his wrist and mud bucket in one and the spatula in the other. “Well what the hell do I do now?” he asked himself. He could really use Mr. Jimmy’s insight right now. Or Tommy. Tommy knew this stuff his uncle was one of the local handymen. But Tommy had also been the one to drag the keg in so maybe not him. He stepped up to the biggest of the damages and pulled off a piece of the thick paper. He held it up to the wall and blocked off the hole.

“Oh!” he realized excitedly, “I see,” Steve nodded to himself proudly and crouched to set the bucket on the floor. He stuck the spatula in and took some up with it. “Like paste,” he mumbled to himself and started smoothing the mud stuff on one side of the tape strip he’d measured out. He grinned and stuck it to the wall over the hole so that the top and bottom connected to the uncracked wall. He did that same thing until the whole hole was patched up. He looked at the pale ‘paste’ and looked back at the wall thoughtfully.

He started, then, to slather more joint compound (he’d finally read the bucket) on top of the tape (he had also then remembered the rushed instructions Mr. Jimmy had thrown out). He smoothed it out tediously and left it be to repeat on the other hole. When he’d finished with that task he found his arms and pants speckled with clumps of dried and crumbly spackle. Steve didn’t think it would be this messy. He picked it off his arms as he walked back to the upturned floor. He winced as the dried beads pulled at his arm hair.

Now, to get the new flooring in, Steve grabbed the hammer and the cylinder with the glue stuff. He really had no clue what it was supposed to be. But he did have an idea of what he had to do. So, he laid out all the new flooring, which he was happy to note was just about a perfect match to the old floor, and started patching the right lengths in place. When he had the puzzle figured out he stared at the tube thoughtfully. He scratched at the tip to see if it would give and when it didn’t he went to the kitchen for scissors.

He snipped off the cap and held it upright as he ran back to his station. Steve turned over one of the boards and pushed in the bottom to get the contents out. Which proved more difficult than he’d hoped. A spurt squirted out but then it stopped.

“Okay,” he sighed defeatedly, “What the fuck?” he set it down and went back to his pile of hardware supplies. There was an odd contraption that did have a base with the same diameter of the cylinder canister. He shrugged a grabbed it, “Worth a try.” He fitted it in and adjusted it so it looked somewhat how he assumed it should. He set the point on the board plank and pulled the trigger a few slow times until the glue came out. He laughed a loud ‘AH-HA’ and swirled it around. He flipped it over after setting down the canister and contraption and fitted and locked it in as best he could with the hammer. Sure, there was about two dents because he hit it a little bit too hard. But it was in and he only had five more boards to fit in. He felt happy enough.

Throughout the rest of the installment he had managed to not get the ‘liquid nail’ on his hands and there weren’t any too obvious dents in the floor, nor anymore scratches. He went back to his list to cross things out and check his progress.

1.) The floor

2.) The holes in the walls

3.) That shelf (REPLACEMENT)

4.) The table

He knew he had to use that block thing to sand down the dried compound. and then he had to repaint the wall white. But that would be simple. The shelf though, that was something else. He had seven wood planks that Mr. Jimmy had cut down for him already. He just had to screw them together and sand them down. Mr. Jimmy had said something about stain or wax but Steve waved it off, the only thing that went on the old shelf was little boxes that held his great great great grandmother’s spoon collection (something he had stored away before his party).

He went outside to the patio with the small hand drill, the 3x4’s, and the thin screws that he’d bought from the store. He sat criss-cross on the concrete and set up the little shelf. It took fifty six minutes and a couple minor slivers and scrapes, but he had the shelf put together with the screws just barely noticeable. He inspected the wood and decided that it was fine as it was. A close enough replica. He went back inside with it, not bothering to sand all the little nooks, and placed it against the wall experimentally. If he put it down a little the holes from before would be concealed just fine.

He drew two little lines with a pencil down the line where the original screws had been. He knew he needed a post to screw into, that the drywall wouldn’t hold. See? He was learning. He lined up the backing plank and placed the level on top, shifting the shelf just so the bubble was in the middle of the lines. He then drilled a screw through it and into the wall. Before he let it go he drilled in the second with some struggle since the he kept loosing balance. But eventually, it was in the wall. His arms were sore and he felt a headache coming on but he had the new shelf up and if his mother was kind enough to not go inspecting it, it would pass just fine. He laughed victoriously and skipped a little around joyously. He was almost done.

“Just a few more things, just a couple,” he consoled his aching limbs. Drills were hefty little things and reminded him of those wild horses in movies that always tried to buck the cowboys off. He groaned a little as he spotted the mess of a table on his way to grab a snack.

He turned his nose to the visual reminder, “I’ll be back to deal with you,” he grumbled. “I need a damn Jell-O cup.”

===

It was actually the next day that he finally got to it. His parents would be back home Monday and he still had a few things left to do. So much for an easygoing weekend. Tommy had called that morning and asked him to go with him to a neighborhood baseball scrimmage, but he’d said he was busy and hung up. He had been mid-sanding down the dining table. And after three hours of perfecting and perfecting it all again. After so much time getting sore and sweaty and coughing from dust. The table was finally flat and there was no more sign of scratches. He got the cloth that Mr. Jimmy had thrown at his face the day before and opened the strong chemically smelling can. He gagged but dipped it in and started applying the wood stain carefully, following the lines of the wood on pure instinct. It made sense too even if he wasn’t totally sure if it was actually right. But, either way, within that hour he had the table back to its original color and left it to dry completely.

He stared at the bumpy wall of compound. He knew this would be bad. If the wood dust was bad, this mud stuff was going to be worse. He wasn’t that naive.

And he was right. By the time it was smooth he was coughing and in dire need of a glass of water. He was never having a damn party at his own house again. Tammy and Sara could continue to host them, people didn’t react well to the spaciousness in the Harrington house apparently. In a rush and loss of interest in his work, Steve quickly painted over the patches with white and left it to dry. He got the can of wax and rubbed it on around the table in his final task.

He was tired as hell and he still had to go to school tomorrow. And he really needed to speak with the person who put orange peels down the damn sink.

===

On Monday morning, at approximately 5:48 AM, Steve Harrington sat in the living room watching I Love Lucy while eating toast as his parents bustled inside.

“Hello!” he heard his mother chirp tiredly as she entered through the foyer. She hurried over and he gave her as welcoming of an embrace as he could. “How are you, dear? Foods in good supply?” she pulled away to inspect him with her hazel eyes, “Heating system still working alright?”

Steve nodded and smiled, “Everything’s just fine. But I have to go and meet Tommy before school, that alright?” he stepped to the side and towards the stairs.

“Of cour—“ his mother was cut off by the monotone cords of his father.

“Stephano, what is up with this mess!” In that moment, Steve Harrington didn’t think he’d ever felt as much fear as he had in that moment. He bolted to the kitchen.

“What mess?”

His father pointed to the wrench, screw driver, and tape measure on the island counter, “Away with this mess, Steve. Clutter is nothing to approve of. It accumulates and it’s unprofessional.” If he only knew.

===

Years later, when he was in everlasting love with Billy Hargrove and they had their shared, small and cozy Chicago apartment, his handyman skills came back to great use.

“Steve! Steve!” Billy shouted in a panic.

Steve rushed from the bedroom to the kitchen, socks skidding on the floors, “What is it? What happened?” he flocked around his boyfriend and checked for any injuries.

Billy pointed rigidly to the sink, “Somethings up with the pipes or something.”

Steve rose his brows in bewilderment, “You don’t know how to unclog pipes?”

Billy furrowed his, “You do?” Steve nodded and opened the cupboard, kneeling to check the pipes.

“Okay so there’s PVC pipes here, I don’t even need a wrench!” he peaked back up at Billy’s wide eyes. “Can you get me that bucket I usually give you when you get hungover?” Billy nodded and jogged out of the room. Steve got a hand towel and placed it down, “What did you put down the drain anyway?” Billy almost hit him in the face with the bucket when he turned back. He froze and took it from the nervous man.

“Uhm. Potato peels,” he answered.

Steve scoffed, “It’s always peels isn’t it?”

Billy stepped back when Steve started turning the rings, “What?”

“Nothin’.” He twisted it quick and managed to not get sprayed in the face while the murky water and loads of potato peel flowed out into the large bucket. When the flow stopped he reattached the pipes together and hefted the bucket out to Billy. “Put that down the toilet, Tiger.” He turned back and heard the sloshing in the bucket and the grunts from Billy as he went through the hallway. Steve chuckled to himself and wiped up the small water spillage.

When Billy returned he had opinions.

“First of all, that shit was gross as hell,” he left the bucket by the front door before returning into the kitchen. “Second of all,” he boxed Steve in with a smirk in his face, “I didn’t know you were so good at pluming.”

Steve rolled his eyes, “Finish making the calzones, Bill, and maybe I’ll show you how to fix that hole in the wall behind Max’s photo hanging in the living room. It’s suspiciously shaped like that baseball I told you not to throw around.”

Billy fumbled for his words.

Steve shook his head, “Don’t think you can hide that shit from me, Tiger, I’m the one that dusts.”

===

The next time was when Max and Lucas visited.

“William, do not throw that!” Steve scolded as he held a pan with tomato sauce in it. Lucas dropped his hands that had been ready to try and catch the ball and Max turned a page of her book from where she was on the sofa boredly.

Billy grinned and threw the football anyway, of course. Steve sighed and then grew furious as the same football smashed instantly into the rickety bookshelf and the sad, old thing crumbled on impact. It fell over from Billy’s uncalculated, rebellious force and the shelves snapped apart from the sides. Books strewn out in a messy wave. Steve stomped over and only lowered his near growl of scolding when Billy showed himself already terrified. Max grinned and set her book in her lap to watch.

“What did I say?” Steve demanded while whacking Billy’s shoulder with the oven mitt. The other flapped his hands back to stop the assault.

“I’m sorry!” he yelped, “I’m sorry! We’ll just buy another one!” Steve glared and whacked his head, lighter than before, but still with vigor.

“We don’t have the money, William! We bought the last one at Goodwill for $14!” He bustled back to the kitchen and put the pan into the oven to cook the sauce the rest of the way. “I’ll just have to go down and ask Jeffery to use his wood scraps and nail gun. He’s always kind enough.”

Billy, who had followed him in, looked skeptical, “Jeffery Jeffery or creepy Jeffery?”

Steve rolled his eyes, “Old man Jeffery. And Jeff isn’t creepy, he’s just anti-social.”

Billy went unswayed, “I want to go with you. Let’s go,” he went to the coat closet and Steve sighed, unsurprised.

Steve took his coat and boots from Billy and called to the kids, “Lucas, Max, the sauce will be done in a couple hours. If we’re not back by then just take it out and let it cool please!”

“Sorry, Steve!” he heard Lucas say sincerely.

“Got it, Boss!” Max answered with another flutter of a page in her book.

===

While Steve attached the air hose to the nail gun Billy watched with creases in his forehead.

“What are you ogling, Tiger?” Steve asked as he applied wood glue to a piece.

Billy stooped forward, “Can I help?” he was almost eager sounding.

Steve grinned, “I was hoping you’d ask.” He lifted his own hands from holding the planks together, “Hold that as I nail it together would ya?” Billy nodded a bit unsurely but placed his hands and pushed just as Steve had. Steve lined up the gun, pushed down, and pulled the trigger. Billy flinched at the loud noise and Steve set the gun down and stood up from his focused crouch.

“Are you alright,” he cupped Billy’s cheeks, thumbs gently smoothed the corner eye crinkles.

The other nodded and pecked Steve’s forehead before shrugging it off, “Was just surprised is all.” Steve nodded back and smiled kindly before returning as he was before and finished the line of nails.

Not too long later, the book shelf was put together and Steve handed Billy a piece of sand paper. He showed Billy how to use it and he got complaints in return due to the uncomfortable noise it made.

But they did return home with a lovely new bookshelf. And they’d made it together so it was all that extra bit of special.

Maybe Steve didn’t disapprove of that party all those years ago after all. Look what he got out of it?

The smile Billy got whenever he looked at that shelf filled with Steve’s mystery romance and his own horror thrillers, that fond and euphoric smile was enough for Steve Harrington in the long run.