#feanorians on crack

[doodle-pops]

*enter Maedhros*

*Y/n, Celegorm and Curufin fighting*

Maedhros: What's happening in here?!

Amrod: We were playing Monopoly

Amras: Apparently Celegorm stealed from Curufin who stealed from Y/n

Maglor: And now they're nearly killing themselves

Caranthir: GO Y/N GO! KICK THEIR ASS, I BET 100 BUCKS ON YOU!

Maedhros: Caranthir!!

Caranthir: What?! Cant I have some fun 'round here?

Celegorm: AAAH MY HAIR!

Y/n: *pulling their hair strongly* GIMME MY FUCKIN MONEY!

Curufin: *with a chair in their hands* YEAH gimme MY money back too!

Y/n: BITCH if you dont shut the--

And this is why the feanorians never do a game day anymore

-👻

Me who is watching them with Maedhros: *dials 911*

The police: *911 what's your emergency*

Me: Yeah, I'd like to report a 4th kinslaying, send the whole team, everyone you have

[sadsilmarilsoup]

This would so be me 😂

If anyone knows who the artist is please speak up!

[eloquentsisyphianturmoil]

Nurse, taking Maedhros’ temperature: …it says 40 Celsius?

Maedhros: you should see my father’s.

[maglorslostsilmaril]

this came to me in a vision

[melestasflight]

@maedhrosmaglorweek Special: An award-winning recipe by J.R.R. Tolkien.

[general-illyrin]

Crack fic idea inspired by this post:

At his death, Boromir gets transported to First Age Beleriand, and upon finding out Sauron -what do you mean, "Mairon"? why does everyone have so many names?!- is around, he promptly joins the Feanorians in attacking Morgoth. His reasons?

No one, especially not some god who doesn't even have the courage to show his face is going to stop him from killing Sauron himself and saving his friends. He'll march in there alone if he has to.

The Feanorians have an eight-pointed star just like Gondor, so they are definitely trustworthy (also to him it seems like they're the only ones doing anything)

Someone responsible needs to take care of this disaster of a family, and he will adopt them if that's what it takes (what do you mean, of course it is absolutely not because he's missing his brother)

[psstwantsomecheese]

Silmarillion as stuff I have on my phone part 2

[mascula-sappho]

Fingon: complaining about how Maedhros refuses to stop organizing and reorganizing their closets because "they aren't efficient enough"

Nerdanel, smiling knowingly: yeah Náro used to do that all the time, drove me crazy. Come over for tea?

*later at tea*

Fingon: and he can't express his emotions!

Nerdanel: yup.

Fingon: and he has severe anxiety!

Nerdanel: uh huh.

Fingon: when he goes to do something, it's like a dog with a bone, you cannot dissuade him even if it's a horrible idea!!

Nerdanel: one time I caught Náro in the forges before the morning light supposedly because "the garden gate wasn't working right and he must invent a more optimized design" he collapsed in my arms.

Fingon: yeah that's like when Nelyo injured himself because he refused to stop practicing swordplay when he was recovering in Mithrim. I had to knock him over onto the ground to prove to him he needed rest.

Nerdanel: ... seems it runs in the bloodline.... :)

[carmisse]

Random moments from the Silmarillion PT 3

[eri-pl]

You know, what else would be hilarious?

You know, in AtLA the "Ember Island" episode? The one with theather? Imagine: After Doriath, the remaining Feanorians (M&M, A& maybe A depending on what you prefer) go spying among the refugees in one or another city (no, IDK how Maedhros is not recognizeable, elven illusions, ok? Maglor does it) and there is a theatre and it does a play about Feanor and his sons (mostly about the sons) and it has the budget of a Czech musical and historical accuracy of the Amazon series.

Most of the men are played by girls (because boys and adults are mostly dead or fighting), Maglor is the main character, portrayed as weeping all the time and talkieng about hope (see: Katara in the episode) and hating his brothers (also, a strong suggestion that he's actually Fingolfin's son). Maedhros is portrayed as an orc-like monster but also has a lot of evidently artifical muscles which he flexes all the time in a flirty way. Celegorm is shown eating people, beating his dog, and still somehow is a comic relief. Curufin is played by the same actor as Feanor, only wearing heels (yes, they do the "short Feanor" thing) and is basically the same character, only he screams less and speaks in whole sentences (yes, they somehow make Feanor dumb). Caranthir is somehow turned human to marry Haleth (who is an evil witch). Amrod and Amras are one character.

Oh, and the actor playing Maglor cannot sing well (for an Elf at least).

And they need to sit there unnoticed in order to gather information about the Silmaril later, or something.

[doodle-pops]

*Y/n and Maglor inside a room*

Y/n: Pull it out

Maglor: I can't

Y/n: just do it, you have to

Maglor: I cant pull out right now

Y/n: Maglor!

*Maedhros entering the room suddenly, thinking their s/o is cheating*

Maedhros: I can't believe you cheating on me with my brot-

*Maglor and Y/n sitting on the floor playing jenga*

Y/n&M: What?!

Maedhros: 😨😨

Maedhros: *slowly turning around and leaving*

My boy was so embarrassed

-👻

Is there ever a time where Maedhros isn't embarrassed???? He gets red all the time. At this point it's a competition between him and Cara on who gets red more🤭🤣🤣🤣

[animatorweirdo]

Bodyguard From Another World

(A crack fic crossover between Silmarillion / Attack on Titan. Hope you like it)

Requested by @springfountain

Congrats on finishing your series anima! Great work on both of them👍So some crack idea for you:

A titan reader gets transported to Middle-Earth and has their right hand cut off during a fight. They look at Mae, a smug smirk on their face, and regenrate their hand saying "Imma make you real jealous now."

It would be lovely if you could write crack headcanon based on this for all Sons of Fëanor like you did with Raiden's handmaid.

Warnings: bad jokes, falling into a hole, reader being slightly lazy, losing limbs, (Maybe poor writing? It's a crack fic, who cares) growing back limbs, and more bad jokes.

-------------------------------------------

- You are not entirely sure how you got where you are now. 

- You remember it being some kind of scouting mission outside the walls. You and your team were safely chilling on a tree, taking a break, and then you found an interesting hole at the bottom of the tree. 

- You went to check it out since there were no Titans nearby, and then your team began to joke about rabbit holes and other worlds they read about in storybooks. 

- You were right in front of the hole, looking down and trying to see if you could see the bottom. Then, one of your teammates thought it would be a fun idea to smack you in the back, causing you to lose balance and fall into the hole. You were not quick enough to catch yourself in time, so you slipped in and fell into the bottomless hole screaming. 

- It happened so fast. You were blinded by the darkness and the ground beneath you was so slippery that you couldn’t catch onto anything to stop your violent sliding. Then, you saw light at the bottom and before you knew it, you were thrown out of the hole. 

- You violently rolled out of the hole. Thanks to your gear, you didn’t roll far and landed on your back. Groaning painfully on the ground, your back ached from the bruises and the dirt that covered the whole backside of your uniform. 

- When you recovered and sat up. You heard your teammate's shouts coming from the hole, but then to your fright and confusion, the tree suddenly started moving. It moved and twisted itself around, closing the hole and trapping you in the world you were now. 

- Luckily, the world you got trapped into was not so bad. There were no Titans, which was a huge plus. The only creatures you needed to worry about were orcs and some other type of creatures that tried to kill you, but honestly, you would take them any day than see another titan. 

- You found work in a guild that took bodyguard work and legal bounty jobs. It helped you get a place to live and get comfortable with your new life. 

- You sparsely used the 3DM gear since this world didn’t have a concept of using gas as a fuel. So, you had to count on your other skills to make yourself useful and earn good money in your job. 

- Even though you missed some of your friends. You didn't mind staying in this world. No Titans, no trauma. Even though orcs were just as troublesome and violent as titans, you preferred to fight someone of your own size than over ten-foot-tall monsters.  

- One day, your guild received a commission from the Noldor elves. Apparently, they needed more manpower to ensure the safety of a party that was to travel to another kingdom for a meeting. It had been a rough time for everyone, so it was understandable. You were picked into the group as you were one of the best fighters, and then you all were set to meet the elves for the time of the job.

- You didn’t pay attention when your group leader spoke with the tall red-haired elf, but when things were settled, you started your journey. You did take a chance to glance at all of them and figured they were the so-called sons of Feanor. 

- You would have preferred to go as quietly as possible but you then managed to catch up a conversation with a few of them. Apparently, you were quite short compared to others which caught their attention. You didn’t take kindly to that remark, but since they were taller than most in your group, you began to understand Captain Levi’s troubles, since he was the shortest man in the scout regiment. 

- The elf named Maglor was pleasant to talk to. You learned many interesting things about elves from him and you shared a few stories of your adventures with him. 

- The elf named Celegorm sometimes butted in, judging your size and experiences. They were just some jabs, and you were okay with him most of the time. 

- You didn’t converse with Curufin much. But you did notice that he seemed shorter than most of his brothers, and when he sent you a jab, you kinda of teased his height which then earned glares from him. 

- You mostly respectfully kept your distance from Caranthir. It’s not that you were afraid of him or his rumored temper. There was just nothing that could have sparked a discussion, and you both were fine with that.

- Surprisingly, you got quite well along with the twins. They heard your tease toward Curufin, and now you had been talking with them most of the journey. What was even better was that they seemed to share your sense of humor.

- You were quite laid back and nonserious. Your group leader often scolded you for slacking, and that seemed to have made a poor impression on the oldest of the brothers, Maedhros. 

- He even joined in the scolding and asked you to take things more seriously. 

- You knew how to be serious when needed, but when there were no immediate dangers, you saw no reason to be serious. 

- Maedhros then remarked that your lack of preparations during jobs will end up bringing you great harm and blah, blah, blaa. 

- Little did they know that you did not need to worry about injuries and such since you had regenerative abilities. 

- You were actually a titanshifter. You just managed to keep it hidden from your friends and the scout regiment and avoid receiving serious injuries that could have given you away. 

- Your guild knew about your abilities since you had ended up in a situation where you lost a leg and grew it back to save someone. 

- They were quite accepting, to your relief, and you might have confessed to them about your other abilities. They were curious but respectful since there was no need for you to shift into your titan form. 

- That was one of the reasons why you preferred to live in this world. You do not want to imagine the mess you would create if the scout regiment knew about your secret. 

- You continued sending jabs at Maedhros when he continued scolding you and then came a day when a large group of orcs attacked you. 

- It was a sudden ambush, even though, you all succeeded in fending off the attack. You protected the tall red-haired elf from a sneak attack and lost half of your right arm in the process. 

- The pain was nothing you had not experienced before, but it did send Maedhros in panic when he saw your bleeding arm. 

- But then you grinned at him. 

- “I’m about to make you real jealous right now,” you said. 

- He looked at you confused until you used your ability to regrow your arm.  

- Let’s just say, the look on his face was priceless. 

- Your group leader was quick to explain that you had such an ability, then forced you to apologize for making it a spectacle. 

- You apologized, and then you earned more reactions from his brothers. 

Maedhros 

- He would still be quite frightened and perhaps a little traumatized to see your once cut-off hand now grow back. 

- He was quite relieved that the leader of your group explained your ability and that it was normal for you to grow back your limbs. 

- Your group leader seemed pissed off for the remark you made and made you apologize for the show, which Maedhros gradually accepted. 

- Let’s just say, Maedhros did not underestimate you again and left you on your own things even if you still slacked off. 

Maglor

- He would be shocked, but then curious about your ability. 

- He would inquire a lot about it and question if you had more than one time ended up losing a limb during your adventures. 

- You were happy to explain it to him and that you could heal your wounds. 

- He might have gotten new song ideas about you, and couldn’t wait to get started with them once he got home. 

Celegorm 

- He would most likely be surprised and then impressed by your ability. 

- He would ask what other things you could grow back and probably found your remark toward Maedhros funny.  

Curufin 

- Shocked and will most likely try to make sense of your ability and why would a human possess such an ability. 

- Will not confront you about, and will most likely stay away from you. He’s hella weary of you now. 

- Does not enjoy when Celegorm makes strange scenarios and questions about it. 

Caranthir 

- Definitely, the one who will most likely be the most weirded out by your ability. 

- You two do not talk, but now he will most likely look your way and try to see if you could do other weird things. 

- He will most likely start doubting if you are even a human. 

- He is weary of you but does respect how you defended Maedhros. 

Ambarussa 

- Not too weirded out by your ability since they have probably seen stranger things. 

- Will ask questions and be amazed by other things you could do. 

- Would probably laugh if you asked Maedhros if he needed a hand with your severed arm.

- You are pretty unhinged with your sense of humor.

[solmarillion]

i have the silmarils on my christmas tree, aren't they so pretty?

they're perfect ornaments, i'd love to kee-

[the sons of fëanor have entered the chat]

[superloves4]

Will never forget this one person that said Tolkien made a mistake by putting Galadriel with Celeborn and that she should have ended with Celebrimbor instead, no hate to people who like this ship without being dicks about it, but because of that all I can think of this relationship now is

[dfwbwfbbwfbwf]

Crack AU: Messmer and Fëanáro

Absolutely unhinged AU where Messmer somehow ends up in Valinor, and everyone just assumes he's Náro's kid. Even Náro and the rest of the family assume he's theirs.

Nerdanel: Cirmahto, would you be a dear and get your father and brother from the forge?

Messmer: Of course, Mother. *leaves and returns a couple minutes later with Fëanáro and Curufinwë arguing with one another, each trapped in one of his snakes*

Nerdanel: Thank you, darling.

-----

Melcor: *knocks on Fëanáro's door, which opens* Ah, Fëanáro, I - *blinks and looks into a single gold eye, which is level with his* Pardon me, but do I know you?

Messmer: Father says to go away. And he called you a bird.

-----

Why Cirmahto? Well, Messmer is a real world name that means "knife maker". I know that has nothing to do with the game, but I wanted to Quenya-ify it, and Cirmahto means "knife maker".

@papita474 Enjoy this cracky garbage. XD

[curiouselleth]

The CIA logo has a 16 pointed star, and has wonderful resemblance to the feanorian star

Feanorian star:

CIA logo:

Maglor runs the CIA or was their graphic designer send post