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foreverlostindreams · 4 years ago

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Restless and paranoid

Rating: Explicit content, smut, not for readers under 18

Every part of your body hurt and you could feel dirt crumbling off you with every move. ‘A quick mission, a walk in the park really’ that's what Tony had said and one should think as the genius he is, that's what it was going to be, but no. You had been nearly buried alive and strangled. That is not what usually happens during a walk in the park in your area at least.

Your mission partner behind you let out a groan that vocaised every bit of displeasure you felt about your situation. “I’m going to scan the area. Not believing the tin man again, when he says it’s ‘save’. You can have the shower.” was the next thing you heard from Bucky and before you could offer help, he was gone. Great communication. But who were you to complain to be the first one to shower really? The small place they made you stop by to wait, while Tony’s technology made sure the Hydra base had absolutely no overlooked information to offer at the end of the day, was not bad, surprisingly. Styled like a twin bed hotel room, with a small entrance area that held two armchairs and a TV, said twin beds and a door that hopefully led to an equally nice bathroom. It was also not too far away that you would need to make it a whole new mission to go back, but far away enough to let you at least get the hope of maybe getting a bit of peaceful sleep before the morning. Even if Bucky was seemingly not sold on that one, you were an optimist.

An optimist with muscles that were starting to cramp, as you noticed, when scanning the room again for the fastest way to the bathroom, since you were still getting dirt everywhere. Two things a shower could hopefully fix in one go and if Bucky was as precise with his scanning the area now, as he was during the mission, you might have time for a little extra relaxation afterwards, because god knows you needed it. Keeping that in mind you listened extra carefully for the tone of his steps or other sounds he could make, while undressing from your protective gear and uniform and finally getting under the pleasantly warm water.

It took some time until the water rushing over you became clear again and even a little bit longer until the muscles in your neck and legs relaxed. It was just then that you noticed that it was not actually your muscles shaking from exhaustion, but your nerves trying to cope with your newest near death experience. Maybe even with all the drama of the last thirty days, because it really had been quite a month for you.

After years of trying to get it right, your boyfriend had decided even though you had stepped back from all aspects of your work (or what you had to tell him was your work) he didn’t like, like trips (missions) and shift work (being part of an fieldagent team), that you were not going to work as a couple anyway. So you were dumped, after you had lost years of possibilities to work your way up to that idiot. Getting back out of your basic office job at SHIELD that you had stepped down to, back into action was double the work, mentally and physically.

The amount of times you nearly had been injured or died in the missions you were allowed to partake in was clearly embarrassing, but to this point nobody had said anything. Maybe the expectation on ‘normal’ agents had gone down after everything the avengers had done in the last years, maybe you were just on a trial period, but you were not going to ask. Fury was not known to take questioning his decisions well and you definitely didn't want to be kicked for that one.

Signing you let your head fall against the cold tiles you tried to slow those racing thoughts. It didn’t work so you listened again for any signs that bucky might have returned or was coming and when you couldn't spy anything you made a decision. You felt a blush creeping up your face, but you let your hands slide south anyway.

Bucky was in a foul mood. This whole mission was supposed to go very differently than what it had done. He was supposed to back in the Headquarter by now, destressing from the mission, not patrolling the surrounding of an unknown building, that Stark deemed as ‘safe’, with all senses still on full alert. You would have probably done it as well, but you had looked like you were going to fall over any moment after the day you had. The last thing he needed now, was you collapsing on patrol or worse getting ambushed and him having to find you and get you back here.

He would be lying, if he said he was not glad, when he finally turned back and everything seemed to be quiet. He could use a couple of hours of relaxing, maybe even sleep, even though he never slept well in unknown beds and with other people around. Still it was worth a try on a day like this. The shower was still running when he came and he silently prayed you had not forgotten him here and were using all the hot water. Then he heard it and all his thoughts took a very different direction.

That could not be true. He definitely misheard. You wouldn’t. Would you? He heard it again. You would it seems. Did you not hear him coming back? What was he supposed to do? You whimpered again followed by a sound that sent him back to a time, where he would enjoy very little more than drawing that sweet sound from dames, when they were trying so hard to keep it all very quiet, so no one would notice. He could not stop his mind from wandering and replacing the blurred faces that were left in his memory with a clear version of your beautiful one. His breathing was getting heavier by the minute.

Struggling to decide between loudly closing the door again to have you notice him and just rushing into the bathroom had him standing frozen in the bedroom. Just marching in didn’t seem clever, he would probably catch you off guard, maybe even be the reason you’d fall in the shower and hurt yourself even more. It could also damage your good partnership without a way back, if you felt like it would be intruding on your privacy, while you had a boyfriend waiting for you at home no less. He tried to get his mind back to the good manners his mother and sister raised him to have. With all his control focussed he knocked softly on the door and asked, as if he had heard absolutely nothing but the shower running, if you could save him some of the warm water.

You could hear your heart beating in your ears at that moment. Your blood was rushing through your veins under the warm water and at the same time you felt like you dipped in an icy pool. When did he come back? God this is embarrassing, he is a super soldier with super hearing, so he definitely heard you. How could you have gotten so lost in your head? Well, you knew how and there was no turning back now. Only one way out and that was through the door, where said super soldier was waiting. As collected as you could you turned the water off and let him know that you still needed a couple of minutes to dry off. He didn’t comment on that.

Later that evening, when you were finally laying in your small twin bed your restlessness came back. Somehow you felt like the whole room smelled like Bucky. A mixture of the bathroom soap and something uniquely Bucky. That combined with your hormonal brain, that could not stop dirty fantasies from showing up, since Bucky had stepped in the shower and your body that still mourned the high you lost to his knocking, well you were not going to sleep that night.

What felt like hours of tossing and turning later Bucky himself could no longer only listen to your constant moving between the sheets. “What does it take for you to sleep?” he asked, voice rough with sleep he couldn't find like this, before realizing you both knew exactly what. “No comment” was the short answer he got, frustration clear in your voice. “You know, if I could I would get both of us home now, you to your boyfriend and my paranoia to a place that would allow me a few hours of sleep.” That was something a partner could say without crossing some borders right? He could hear another frustrated huff from your bed “You would first need to find me one” “Huh?” “A boyfriend. Don’t have one right now.” “Oh” “Mhm”

A few more quiet moments passed, before you finally spoke up again and a whole lot bolder than before. “Do you think sex would help you parania to calm?” If Bucky was taken aback his voice didn’t show it “Well it certainly is a therapy method no one has made me try before.” “That is not a ‘no’” “No it isn’t”

Within seconds both of you sat up on the bed frames and turned so your faces were just inches apart. You could probably not see as good as the super soldier did in the dark, but you could see enough. "Do you mean it?" you asked, suddenly breathless "Because if not and this is just to make fun of me or spin an even funnier story, we have to stop this right here. I will not take the shitchat and everybody thinking so low of me again. Took me years until people thought I am here for my work and the results again and not just because Tony and I lost radio connection and our way to the rest of the team on one of my first missions by accident. As if the both of us seen stupid enough to sneek of on a mission to have a Quickie while the others might get seriously injured whithout our back up. I will not take rumours like that again, I just got back and want to keep this job and my reputation as someone who works and not sleeps their way up."

Bucky's eyes seemed to scan your face all through your tangent, as if he wanted to remember it like this. He listened and kept quiet, even though some of the things you said might have insulted him, as you later realized. But his voice showed no sign of that, when he answered you. “I have never lied in a delicate situation like this” he stated, which led to you snoring laughter. “I heard very different stories from Steve, about you sweet talking every young lady, that showed an interest in you and even sometimes a second one to accompany Steve.” “If you have to lie when you compliment a woman, you're clearly doing it wrong. But it is good to know, you and Steve are out there talking about me, when I’m not present.” “Don’t let it get to your head, we were merely having a drink and people watching after a mission and spotted someones whose action made me wanna roll my eyes so bad they might fall out and reminded Steve of you.” “You really don’t like sweet talk, do you?” “Words are no actions.” “No but they can be a nice addition.” You made an unconvinced sound. “Just because you never met someone good with their words, does not mean it's not true.” “I guess most people would say Tony ist good with his words -” you teased him. “I would prefer not to talk about Stark right now.” he diplomatically pushed the topic aside, but not before another comment popped into your head. “But talking about Steve is fine?” The laughter was evident in your voice.

Before you could bring up any more men and waste the little time you still had this night, before you were going to get picked up he lunged forward and kissed you. His flesh hand tangled in your hair moments later while the first bit of your build tension slipped out with a breathless moan. As an instinct, your hips went forward in search of some friction and you slipped off the bed onto his crouched legs. If he would not be so inhumanly strong you probably would have tumbled backwards against his bed, but he held you up, while you rocked onto him, metal arm sneaking around your waist and holding you closer, while his lips never stopped their assault on yours. When your hard nipples brushed his hard chest through both your shirts you finally let out another wimper, like the ones you did in the shower hours ago. His grin turned wolfish, while his metal arm flexed and made it impossible for you to continue your movement.

“Did you do it on purpose earlier?” he asked and before he even finished you shook your head, desperate for the talking to stop. “I thought I would be faster, or you slower, something like that - that I would be done and drying off when you would be back.” “Now that would have been unfortunate.” he pointed out and bucked his hips teasingly up against yours. You bit your lip to not let another pathetic sound escape, his ego was already starting to get a little big to boosted for how little he had done. “You know what truly is unfortunate? That hours later I still stand at zero orgasms.” you clapped back, only to find yourself lying back on your twinbed seconds later.

“And you would like to change that?” he asked while hovering over you now “I thought we were past that point in our conversation more than five minutes ago. If you're just here to tease me, I will take things in my own hand again.” you stated. “As much as I would like to see that sometimes, I had enough time to make my own plans, during the time I had to listen to you toss and turn.” “All I hear are promising words again, but no actions.” Within seconds his flesh hand had sneaked up your leg under the hem of your wide sleep shorts, pushed your panties aside and found your clit. Your back arched and your hand flew to your mouth, to keep your sounds muffled. All those hours you had spent telling yourself that you were not hypersensitive after your lost high clearly proven wrong.

“Oh no, none of that. Let me hear those sounds.” he warned you and his metal hand dragged your arm back to your side. Somebody this old should not have the power or be allowed to make you fall apart this fast. You could feel the pleasure already reaching close to your high, after just a few flicks of his finger. It was embarrassing, not to mention the sounds you were making, but you were also so far past caring, especially when his cool metal hand found your nipples through the shirt again. You snapped right there and then and the waves of pleasure took control of your body as you rode out your high against his hand.

You half expected a proud teasing comment, about how he followed up his sweet words, but he just started to drag your shorts and panties down your leg in one swift motion, before returning his hand and filling you with two of his fingers. The breath you sucked in surprise did not drown out the wet sound your body made welcoming him or the ripping sound the linen did when your hands gripped them. “Oh Doll, you don’t have so many sarcastic comments left for me now, do you? Just this sweet welcoming wet heat right?” “How’s your paranoia?” You tried to hold up your front, but the urge to beg him to move was getting stronger by the second. You tried to grip his arm and make him move, but the metal one interfered again, bringing both of them back to the ripped sheets, testament of you losing your cool. “My paranoia is not more than a quiet little sound in the back of my mind. Your experimental therapy seems to be onto something, doll.” he continued your conversation, as if you had made no move. “I’m glad.” You pressed out, now trying to buck your hip up for some sweet friction and ignoring the warm feeling the pet name gave you. You’re not going to change your stance on sweet talk or pet names because of this man. You’re not.

“You know doll, somehow I have a feeling, you're trying to sabotage all of my sweet plans for you for your own goals.” he casually pointed out, while finally curling his fingers up oh so delicately. “For my own gain” you corrected breathlessly, while arching your back again, knowing full well he would understand the difference. “Still this is not how the plan goes'' he commented on your movements with a grin, before holding your hips still. You could hear the sound of your own teeth clashing together, in a fruitless effort to hold the whining sound bubbling up in your throat in. Between those teeth you then pressed out the question “Do your plans at any point including fucking me? Or just fucking around with me?” “Well as it is, I don't exactly bring condoms with me on a quick one day mission.” You filed away the question, if he does bring some on longer missions away for later and questioned on. “When was your last blood test with Dr. Banner?” “Last week” “Did anything risky since then?” “No” his eyes kept you focused and captivated like a bunny in front of a snake waiting to strike. Only you stroke first, grabbing his shirt and pulling him over you, before pushing at his boxer shorts. “Me neither and I’m on the pill” you panted, which let his Cheshire cat grin return, before he muttered teasingly “Sweetest words I heard in ages'' while kicking his shorts away and rocking his now freed hips forwards until his blunt head spread your wetness.

When he pushed further you finally lost the battle to keep your sounds down. He stretched you so deliciously, you could have cried right then and there. All those years of disappointing sex and masturbation forgotten, the second he withdrew and started his harsh and steady rhythm. It just took a few more seconds until your cunt started to make wet squelching sounds again complementing both of your loud breath and groaning and another few until you couldn’t handle all of the sensation. You could feel Bucky twitch inside you and slowing down a bit, into a more sensual pace, but he did not yet follow you into your second orgasm. “Beautiful” was all he said, his eyes scanning your face like they had, when you had angrily lectured him, before he gripped your left leg and pushed it around his hip.

The angle was even better than before and together with his slower rhythm you felt him reach amazingly deep spots inside of you, you didn’t even know you had. This new position also gave you the possibility to let your hands, that had tried to keep him close and push him deeper by holding onto his behind before, roam free now. Those first two highs had definitely taken your edge off and now that you felt him pushing you towards a third and his first you felt the need to take all of him in, should this stay a one time thing. The man had a body all of a woman's dreams centered around after all. Firm muscles that begged to be traced everywhere and you indulced.

Bucky of course noticed your attention shifting, but kept his hips snapping into, waiting to see what you were up to. In the end he hides his smile for your suddenly touchy and slightly sentimental side in your neck, while letting his flesh hand wander up your side to your beautiful breasts. His metal arm has no problems keeping his body and a part of your weight up, which you would comment on at any other time as pure bragging, but right now you were once again lost in sensation, as he twisted your sensitive nipple. Shortly he mused about having fucked all of your sass out of you, just like he had teased you earlier, before he testingly buries his teeth into the juncture of your shoulder. One of your hands finds its way into his hair in return and the way you grip it makes it impossible for him to keep his tempo the way it was. He starts pistoling his hips into yours again and when you rip at his hair vehemently, while driving your nails down his back, he pushes his head back and when your eyes find his, he feels you clenching down on him again. This time he doesn’t hold back.

It takes a minute for you to come back to reality. Only then to feel sweat clinging to your skin, his supersoldier warmth on top of you and the drenched sheet below. “I suppose there will be not enough warm water, to let both of us rinse the smell of sex off, before Tony will be here to pick us up.” “Maybe that is what he gets for ruining a mission he is not even actively on. He will learn from that.” Bucky states while slowly withdrawing from you and landing on his back to your right. “He would never let it live down and probably invest in body cams and supervision in all safe houses or some shit.” you argued his point. “He is a noisy, kinky shit after all.” “I don’t want to know how you know that.” You blindly slapped at his chest for that and a second time emphatically for good measure. “Don’t overdo it. It's me after all, who you have to fight for the warm water. I could let you be the only one smelling of sex and dripping my cum, when entering the jet.” You turn your head to look at him, trying to seem not to turned on at the thought “Are you suggesting that if we both get in there together, there might be enough water?” “Maybe” he grinned back “Only one way to find out”

He was going to be the death of you.

#bucky barnes #bucky x you #bucky barnes x f!reader #bucky barnes one shot #bucky barnes imagine #james buchanan barnes #bucky barnes smut #first smut #Steve Rogers #tony stark

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thisartemisnevermisses · 6 years ago

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Going Under 4/-

Paring: Mostly Steve Rogers x Reader; little Clint Barton x Reader

Warnings: angst, fluff, out of character acting, probable smutt in later chapters, sad reader, broken, sweet ending.

Summary: You work as head oversight for the Avengers. After a party and a little kiss, you start crushing on Steve. Only an event from you’re rookie years, is sabotaging the possibility of your crush to evovle into something more.

A/N I mean wow you guys. All the likes and even followers, I feel honoured. So, this is chapter hold another piece of the puzzle. It also introduces your team (beta team), it's necessary for the next chapters, so you know who were talking about. I mean wow you guys. All the likes and even followers, I feel onnoured.

Chapter 4: broken

“How could it get so out of hand?” Bucky continues. “Well, to get to that point, I need to tell you what happend two years ago. It has to do, with my crush…on…Steve” you continue your story, blushing feveresly. Steve raises his head, what was his role in your story. Oh god, what did he do? Wait what, she has a crush on him too?

“After that day, I left the compound and joined team beta…” you continued.

After your encounter with Clint, you made sure the most important belongings were packet. Without saying goodbye to your colleagues you walked to the hanger. The quinjet that would bring you to the airbus of team beta, stood waiting. Glancing back at the hangar and the attached compound, you remember all the good times you had here. It was where everything started. Where you grew as an analyst, had your first mission as an agent. It was also the place you were humiliated and broken. Your faith in love was damaged, maybe even darkened. You had your flings, but you had never ventured into a relationship. At least if you could call this a relationship. Twenty-four hours on each other's lips, maybe it was normal to get feelings for one another? Did you overreact?

Taking your seat in the quinjet, you rethink the events that happened recently. His kiss, the way he touched you, the burning sensation that you still feel on your body. The way your heart shattered when you saw him with his wife. You feel tears forming in your eyes. Thinking about that morning after you had seks. You stayed in bed, talking about what you want most. How Clints perfect day would look like and how he would spend it with the one he loves. At that time, you thought he was talking about you. You were so wrong. The way his eyes looked at you, how he held you and made love too you for the second time, taking his time, savoring every little bit of you. How could he do that to you, to her, to their unborn child. You felt nauseous of the idea you were a homewrecker. It didn't help that Clint had treated you wrong in the office. "Sleeping my way up, huh as if" you mumble to yourself. Thinking of it, who was agent ca..and what had he or she told Clint about you, telling him lies. Your thoughts were interupted.

“Is this seat taken?” a young woman with braided dark red hair asks. She is about your age and casually clothed. You look at her with sad eyes, barely registering her question, she excuses herself. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to disturbe you. Are you alright?” She said looking concerned. Wiping at the corner of your eyes, swallowing before speaking “yeah, no..no I’m fine” you say scraping your throath. “What was your question” you ask looking at the young woman.

“I wondered if this seat was taken. It will take a while before we get tot he hangar where the airbus is located” she says smiling. “Sure sit down, just me, myself and I” you smile. “Oh good, you have a split personalty too.” The woman laughs and for the first time, since feeling so miserable you laugh. If she is part of the team you’re going to work with, it could be fun.

“Im Lexi Star, beta’s engineer” she says while holding out her hand. “Hi, I’m y/n, soon to be analyst of beta team.” You answer shaking her hand. “Welcome, to our team. It’s going to be fun. I think you’ll fit wright in. Seems we have the same kind of humor.”Lexi smiles, her whole face lights up. You’re going to like her, you already know that.

During your flight, you two chat about all kinds of stuff. How you were trained at the academy, complaining about your professors, to your first assignment as an missionanalyser. When Lexi asks you if you have any field expierence, you quickly answer with a yes and change the subject.

Arriving at the hanger, you see agent Coulson talking to a tall man in a suit. Could it be that, this was agent Robbins? You’ve read about him in the files you got. Walking towards the two men, you adjust your cloths and check your hair in a window. “Ah, agent y/l/n, you’re here.” agent Coulson says smiling. “I was just telling agent Robbins, how lucky he is with you on board. I’m very pleased about your work. You got a goodone Robbins. And if you let her, she could be more then just an analyst” agent Coulson says while patting agent Robbins shoulder. “Well then, I will do my very best to let her use her full potential.” Agent Robbins smiles at you. “Come agent y/l/n, I will introduce you to the rest of the team”.

You two walk towards a group off four people, two woman, ofwhich one is Lexi and standing next to her is a tall woman, with long black hair. The two men are discussing something on a tablet. One of them is tall and has broad shoulders. His haircolor stand out, he has strawberry blond hair. The other has a very short hairdo and is two to three inches smaller then the other guy. “Y/N, this is Agent Callie Strong, bio-chemist of this team” agent Robbins says, while you shake the tall black haired woman hand. “You've already met Agent Lexipedia.” agent Robbins laughs, Lexi turns her eyes, “That joke is getting old, Finn.” Lexi adds. “These are Agent Owen Lake and Avery Rhinebeck, our fieldagents.” Agent Robbins points toward the strawberry blond man and his teammate. “Well team, this is our new analyst, agent y/l/n.” agent Robbins introduces you. “Lets get this thing in the air and I will brief you about the upcomming mission. Agent y/l/n, Agent Star wil show you, to your room.” Robbins says before heading towards the coackpit.

-------------------------------------------

You stand infront of the mirror. Tonight would be the night. After almost 8 years you head back to where everyting started. Sinds that day, you never went back, making sure every contact you had went via e-mail or video calls.

Looking at your reflection, you ask yourself if you look okay and your thoughts even go to Clint for a second. You shake your head and skold yourself for even thinking the slightest about him. You pull at your dress, which is a black sleeveles a-line dress. It goes to your knees and has a lace embroaded bodice. You’re skirt is made of tule and you wor black high heels on. You felt elegant and pretty in it, it made your girly side scream. Your smockey eye make-up and romantic hairdo made you look gorgious. Turning again you look how your skirt twirls and the sound the tule makes you relax. You would have fun tonight and noone would stop you. There’s a knock on your door and Lexi comes in. “Wauw, you look stunnig” she compliments. “Thanks Lexi” you answer shy.

“Well, ready to party” Lexi asks while dancing. “Lets get wasted” Avery yells while crashing into your room. “Get out Avery, only ladies alowed” Callie says walking in and shoves Avery out of the room. “Well, that leaves you out” Avery mockinly says, “Love you too honey.” Callie answers smiling, while flipping him off.

“So before we go to the party. Are there things we need to know.” Callie asks smiling mischievous.

“Like uhmm has Bucky have bad breath or how much alcohol can Sam hold? Whats Thor’s soft spots.” Lexi gigles, her face is getting redder by the minute.

You smile, “Sorry guys, I can’t give you an answer. I don’t know them. The Avengers didn’t excist during my time in the compound. I can only tell you to watch out for Clint Barton. He’s an asshole.” You say staring into space.

“Oh…do tell.” Callie smiles a devilish smile. “Are you speaking out of experience.” She asks wiggling her brows. “You got yourself a piece of the Bartonpie.”

“Yeah and it tasted bittersweet.” You answer softly.

Lexi looks at you, seeing the shift in your appearance. You look at yourself in the mirror, blinking a few times. After all these years, you still felt the pain in your chest. The pain Barton caused by crossing you.

“You..you don't have to talk about it.” Lexi says seeing how you try to controle yourself. “Its okay” you breath. “Lets talk about it on our way over to the party. Maybe telling you about it, will help me finale close it. Hell, maybe it will even help me face him tonight if I would encounter him.” You say taking your purse and leave your room.

“I don’t understand what Steve has to do with this sofar.” Bucky interrups you.

“I will get there, you see, I encountered Clint at that party and fled to the balcony. But we're getting ahead of things. I know the story is long, but you gave me the chance to tell my version. I don’t want to let anything out.” You say looking at Bucky. He could see te determination in your eyes.

#Steve Rogers #steve x reader #steve rogers x reader #clint barton x reader #clint x reader #marvel #marvel fanfiction #fluff #shield

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