#fighting for my life posting for the third time bc this isn't showing up in tags >:l

[polarolds]

the quarry art dump 🫡

[nonclassyparty]

tins without labels - prologue (j.wy)

summary: Jung Wooyoung's life was always somehow intertwined with your own. from living in the same neighbourhood as kids to attending the same college; fights, bickering, bruises, teasing comments and tears. Wooyoung and you were never complete strangers but never friends either. Always somewhere in between, growing up with each other but never actually knowing one another. The relationship takes a confusing turn in your third year of college after an injury that places your football career on hold. Lonely, lost and confused, you find yourself at your first college party in the presence of none other than Jung Wooyoung asking him to show you what exactly have you been missing out on. playlist // my main masterlist // moodboard (tba) // click to donate to Palestine

pairing: jung wooyoung x reader warnings: none for this chapter i think! word count: 9.3k taglist: just reply or inbox me if u'd like to be added c: a/n: pls don't say damn when u see that i started another story. listen LISTEEEEEN. i know what u all will say..."bree should u rly be starting another series when u havent finished or started the 4757 bajillion ones that u already posted?" the answer is YES. let me explain myself briefly, this summer has been rly hard for me bc i lost someone who was incredibly important to me and i just can't write...i just can't! everything looks like shit!!! im halfway done with soot and something just isn't letting me continue. i can't write pretty on the outside or literally anything else i've started bc its all simply too sad. writing is draining to begin with despite how much i love and enjoy it but writing angst is k wording my mental health lol! so....i present to you this series, mostly dedicated to myself literally no one asked for this, i just feel like its something i need to write and always wanted to so here i go! it will be a little heartwarming series with lots of humor and coming of age shenanigans and huge chunks of it written from personal experience and i hope u guys read it and like it. i had a lot of fun writing this prologue. (p.s. i literally know jackshit about football/soccer so if by some chance someone that reads this knows their football shit....just let it go pls lmfaoo)

(prologue; when we were kids)

and I couldn't find the words, i couldn't think of what to say and all that I can do is stop and think about the days when all we used to dream about was meeting after school

6 and 8 years old;

Your mom helped you build the snowman.

An entire morning of running around your front yard, laughing and playing in the freshly fallen snow, seeing the air you breathe out in front of you that you pretended was cigarette smoke to make your mom laugh as the cold nipped at your cheeks.

The snowman was almost twice your size (which wasn't a lot, you were a fairly small child) with pebbles stuck in as his eyes and teeth pulled up in a big grin. Your mom found a small bucket in the old shed behind the house which she placed on his head as a makeshift hat and because you didn't have any carrots, there was a small twig stuck at the center of the snowman's face to serve as a long crooked nose.

(The snowman didn't have any arms, a detail that went over your head at the time.)

After admiring the big statue in the farther corner of your front yard for awhile, you finally retreated into the house with your socks wet along with the majority of your hot pink snowsuit. As you kicked off the damp clothes and exchanged them for warm, dry ones and fuzzy socks and then settled in front of the TV in the toasty living room with a mug of cocoa - you couldn't help but feel that it was a happy day.

Which is why when, in the late afternoon, once you looked out of your window to see what once used to be your snowman is now nothing but a big pile of disheveled snow with his plastic hat rolling around the sidewalk and two boys running away down the street with shrill laughter echoing after them, you simply couldn't help but burst into tears.

"Mommy!" You screamed out, running outside your front door in fuzzy socks and your sweater, as dramatic as you were. But you were six and your life still ended and began with coloring books and favorite toys, so a snowman that you made with your mom getting destroyed, surely felt like the end of the world.

Once your mom stepped out after you, about to scold you for walking outside into the cold air with no jacket on, you burst into crocodile tears as you pointed to the spot where your snowman once stood.

"Oh, no." She breathed out with a sigh before grabbing her jacket and slipping into whatever shoes were available by the door (they were your dad's old tennis shoes) and walking across the front yard to collect the small bucket from the sidewalk.

All you could do was stand and watch as you wailed so loudly after your snowman that the entire neighbourhood could hear.

"Honey, it's okay." Your mom tried to soothe you as she walked up the steps to your house, carrying what used to be the snowman's hat. "It's just a snowman, we'll make another one tomorrow!"

But you were inconsolable, bursting out in another wave of loud cries as you stomped your tiny foot and pointed to the house across the street.

"They ruined it! W-Wooyoung ruined it!" You sob, waving towards the boy's house with all the anger a six year old could possibly muster. You knew it was him, recognizing the ugly red jacket he wore this entire winter and his even uglier looking friend, Chanwook.

You weren't friends with Wooyoung. He was older than you and all of his friends were mean. You once tried to play with them when you first moved to the neighbourhood but they didn't want to play with a girl. You cried about that too.

They often teased you. Wooyoung said your crooked teeth made you look ugly!

She sighs again, "And that was very mean of him. But, Y/N, we'll just make another snowman tomorrow."

"But-" You start again, tears still sliding down your face. 

"We'll build him in the backyard where we have a fence, so no-one will be able to touch him." She offers with a smile, hoping you'll finally be consoled enough to walk inside and be safe from the harsh cold.

"But I won't be able to look at him from the window." You tell her quietly, voice going hoarse from the crying and bottom lip already wobbling as another wave of tears began to sunk in. She gives you a sympathetic smile.

"We'll get him a prettier hat and we'll use two long branches to give him arms!" Your mom offers again, trying to butter you up so the tears would stop. "We'll get a carrot for his nose and big pretty rocks for his eyes!" Once she realized it was working, she continued; "And we'll take a picture of you with him so you'll always get to look at him, even when he melts away!"

You peer up at her with a hiccup, finally bribed enough; "A picture?"

She nods, holding the door wider for you to finally walk inside as you inch towards the door, fuzzy socks now soaked, "A picture. We'll send your dad to the mall to develop them."

So, you finally walk inside the warm house again, changing your socks and immediately going to your father's home office to pester him about the camera and just how long will it take for a picture to be developed.

-

"-Y/N, we'll just make another snowman tomorrow!" 

Wooyoung heard your mom tell you as he peers at the exchange from across the street, through his bedroom window, freshly changed into dry clothes after a long hard day of playing outside with Chanwook and now, warming his frozen hands on the radiator.

When Wooyoung saw the snowman parked in the corner of your front yard, just a step away from the sidewalk, he and Chanwook thought it would be funny to ruin it. 

The thing was ugly and had an even uglier bucket at the top of it's head, perfect to kick around the street!

He didn't think too much about it, if he was honest. Just saw a big lump of snow he wanted to kick at until it collapsed, so that's what Wooyoung did. It was just a silly snowman.

Besides, you were already six years old. Far too old to be making a stupid snowman. You should've been going sledding with the rest of the neighborhood kids on the small hill just a couple of minutes away from your street. Wooyoung was mature now, so his mom allowed him to go without a chaperone this year. You were always so childish, no wonder your mom didn't let you go with them. You cried over everything.

But he didn't expect you to cry over the stupid snowman!

It was just a snowman. It would've melted anyway when the weather got warmer! Or gotten ruined by someone else! 

The brief fear of your mom telling Wooyoung's mom about what he'd done struck him. He'd positively get grounded for ruining your dumb snowman if she found out and then the rest of his winter break would be spent inside of the house.

You could always make another snowman. A better one. And since you're such a crybaby, Wooyoung would make sure to tell Chanwook that they won't be touching that one. Leave that ugly snowman alone.

Just so you wouldn't cry anymore.

-

10 and 12 years old;

"It's a shame your mother is dead, maybe if she was still around she would teach you how to act like a girl!" 

Your face flushed in anger as you stared the other boy, Beomseok, his chubby fingers still wrapped around your pencil case which was how the argument started in the first place.

He was in the same class as you and a typical bully. Bigger than the rest of his peers and always using it to his advantage to intimidate and tease them. Today, he took your pencil case and when you asked for him to give it back, he only gave you a gnarly smile and started running around the classroom and eventually out on the halls, screaming taunts at you. It would be a lie to say that you didn't scream some pretty mean stuff back but in your defense, he deserved it.

Now, you both stood as if you're ready to duel as the rest of your classmates and even some upperclassmen gathered to see what the commotion is all about, your fury rising so high that tears spring in your eyes at the mention of your mom as you observe his smug smirk. Obviously, from a very young age, you were bad at managing your anger.

"I hate you!" You scream out, voice high pitched. Then you jump on Beomseok with your full weight, successfully pulling him to the hard hallway floors as your hands curled into tiny fists that started colliding with his face.

And Beomseok, for all his intimidating build, talked an awfully big game just to end up bursting into tears as your fist collided with his nose. He was bad at fighting, you notice, if he could be beat up by a lanky girl almost two times smaller than him.

"I just-" Punch. "-wanted-" Punch. "-my pencil case-" A slap. "-back!"

"Somebody help!" He screams from under you, whining under each attack but his classmates were too busy cheering you on to come to his defense.

Once you start harshly pulling on his hair, two arms wrap themselves under your armpits and pull you off of your classmate. You're standing again and are turned by your shoulders to come face to face with your teacher, screaming at you.

"Is this a proper behavior in school?!" and lots of "Your father will hear about this!"'s and "You're going to the principle's office!" as she started pulling you by your arm down the corridor that was still filled with students.

"Everyone to your classrooms! Now!" Your teacher screams from the top of her lungs as she tugs on you and you follow after her with a frown on your face.

Stupid Beomseok.

-

Wooyoung's stomach hurts from laughing, clapping Chanwook's shoulder who was almost sitting on the floor due to his own fit of pure glee, as he watches Kim Beomseok roll around the floor in pain, clutching his nose. 

There's scratches and bruises already forming on his cheeks, little bit of blood mixed with a lot of big, fat tears. It's hard to feel even slightly bad for Beomseok, when Wooyoung heard how he torments his classmates along with the younger kids during recess. Did it count as bullying if the bully is the one getting bullied?

Maybe he finally got what was coming for him, nobody usually stood up to him and Wooyoung least expected you to be the one to put him in his place.

He deserved it, Wooyoung thinks, after what he said about your mom.

Wooyoung remembers her funeral three years ago, he remembers how much you cried and how you didn't leave your house for a month that summer. He even rung the doorbell to ask if you wanted to come out and play one time which he never did because you were a child and he was much more mature than you, you two had nothing in common. But he felt sad for you.

Your mom was nice, she always brought Wooyoung a chocolate when she'd come for a visit.

 Sadly, they discovered she had cancer when you were only seven and Wooyoung was nine. By the time they discovered it, it was already too far along and your mom passed away on a summer evening while you were outside playing hide and seek. 

Wooyoung remembers feeling so bad how they always made you the seeker that day because you were the youngest kid in the neighbourhood and far too easy to convince that it was simply always your turn to look for the other kids.

Your dad opened the door, smiling sadly at Wooyoung and saying that you weren't feeling well enough to come out and play. Wooyoung didn't try again after that.

The teacher is pulling you by your elbow through the crowd, yelling at the top of her lungs for everyone to head to their classrooms since class should start in a couple of minutes. You silently follow her, face twisted into an angry grimace.

Your hair has fallen out of your ponytail, long strands sticking to your face and Wooyoung is pretty sure that your shirt got ripped during the brawl. 

Wooyoung might've been laughing a bit too loudly because with angry eyes and cheeks flushed, your head whips towards him just as you pass by him.

Wooyoung opens his mouth with a smile, to say something like "Good job, Y/L!" maybe. He doesn't get the chance to.

"What are you laughing at, Jung?" You ask loudly and Wooyoung's laughter immediately dies down.

"Wha-?"

And it's then, that your foot meets Wooyoung's shin in a harsh kick that makes him yowl in pain and makes Chanwook burst into another wave of laughter as his hands grab at Wooyoung who doubles over in pain.

"Y/N!" The teacher screams out again, pulling you back by your shirt and going on another rant, filled with threats of calling your dad to school and something else he can't process at the moment.

Wooyoung is too busy feeling the pain and anger that fills him up as he rubs at the place your sneaker covered foot meet his leg.

"Y/N, you psycho!" He yells after you who is still getting dragged away. You don't even bother to look back at him.

(He still collects your pencil case from the floor and throws it on a desk that a classmate of yours says belongs to you before exiting the classroom and going to his own. Wooyoung tells himself it's for no other reason but just so your dad won't have to buy you a new one. He has enough on his plate already.)

-

14 and 16 years old;

Wooyoung has a girlfriend.

You don't know why that's something that bothers you so much.

Maybe because you don't understand what a girl could possibly see in Jung Wooyoung to willingly let him hold her hand or...God forbid, kiss her. Ew.

That's a lie, maybe even a bad attempt at coping on your part because there's a general consensus in your high school that Jung Wooyoung is good-looking. 

You didn't even think he was ugly when you were younger, when he was pulling on your pigtails and teasing you for playing with dolls. He was cute for an annoying kid back then too with his chubby cheeks and bowl haircut.

He was especially cute now, a recent discovery of yours which you have no one else to thank except puberty. It did wonders on your hormones and it did wonders on Jung Wooyoung too. 

His jawline got sharper the more baby fat he lost and lips grew fuller. His boyish smile was very attractive, even his smile lines were captivating. Wooyoung grew taller as well, not by much compared to the other boys in his grade but he was tall just enough so you'd have to look up to him when you argue but not enough to be intimidated by him.

So, yes, you supposed you'd understand the appeal if it weren't for his stupid mouth and mean words more often than not, directed at you. You threw shots back as well, sometimes even started an argument first if you were feeling particularly annoying but maybe that sums up why you're so bothered.

He started dating Chaeyoung at the beginning of this summer and since you have the fortune (read: misfortune) of living in the house right across the street from Wooyoung's, you were an unlucky witness to most of their dates.

And he was so sweet to her. He'd buy her cheap flowers and ice cream, they'd walk around the neighbourhood holding hands, they'd take Wooyoung's younger brother Kyungmin to the playground in the evenings. Wooyoung would smile a lot at her and Chaeyoung would always smile back.

You even saw them kiss. Just once.

When you were folding laundry in your bedroom, you looked through the window just in time to see their lips connect on Wooyoung's front porch. You quickly looked away, feeling shy and embarrassed, not understanding why you were blushing or feeling so sad all of a sudden.

Why was he so nice to other girls but never to you? You shouldn't think too much about it, the problem isn't you. Chaeyoung wasn't just some other girl but his girlfriend. Of course, he'd treat her special.

Whatever. You scoff as you watch Chaeyoung run to Wooyoung across the quad as you adjust your sports bag over your shoulder. 

She jumps into his arms and you can hear his loud, annoying laughter even to here as his arms wrap around her and he picks her up from the ground.

"What are you doing?" You almost jump out of your skin at the sound of Ryujin's voice as she nosily tries to follow where you were staring at.

Ryujin was the first friend you met since you started high school two weeks ago. She might be the only friend you have for awhile since you haven't really been trying to even get to know your classmates as you were too busy trying out for the girls football team.

You don't remember when you started actively playing football exactly. You always played it for fun with the boys from the neighbourhood (Wooyoung included)  but maybe it was around seventh grade when your dad pestered you into trying out a sport because he didn't know what else to do with you so he packed you up and sent you to a sports camp for two weeks one summer, that you started actually playing.

You went there only caring about your iPad and came back saying you'll be a professional football player.

Your dad doesn't want to say it but you know he thinks it's a fickle dream that will fizzle out with age.

Thankfully, Ryujin shared the same love for the sport as you so for now, you were relieved and content to spend time with her. She was nice.

You didn't need anyone else but maybe it would've been nice if someone who was older, who you were familiar with even if you always fought, would give you a couple of words of useful advice. Regarding the new teachers and subjects and all.

High school was scary.

"Nothing." You answer quickly, turning your back to Wooyoung and his girlfriend and fully facing your new friend.

"Nothing?" Ryujin gives you a suspicious smile, eyes darting over your shoulder once more before she ruffles your hair. You yelp. "Do you have a crush already, Y/N?"

You gently shove her away with a huff, fixing your bangs, "Don't be stupid. These boys are all ugly."

A crush. As if!

She laughs at that, throwing her arm around your shoulder as she directs you both to the field where practice was held, already yapping about her own crush.

-

"Hey, isn't that your neighbour?" Chaeyoung nudges Wooyoung with her elbow, nodding somewhere behind Wooyoung. He cranes his neck to follow the direction before his eyes land on you.

He snorts, "Yeah."

You were standing in the middle of the football field, sweaty and red in the face from all the running, with your hands on your hips as you paid attention to what your coach was yelling towards your teammates across the field.

The school's jersey seemed far too big on your lanky form and your hair was a mess, always slipping out of your ponytail. You were much smaller in build than the rest of the team and it looked funny to Wooyoung.

He didn't expect you to be into sports, let alone a sport like football. In fact, Wooyoung is surprised that you don't burst into tears when you start arguing with the makeshift referee played by another student. It's what usually happens if you spend longer than a minute arguing with Wooyoung.

And then he ends up being the bad guy for making you cry but no one ever mentions that you sometimes provoke him first as well but can't take it when it's dished right back.

Since you're such a crybaby.

He watches with an amused grin as you bare your teeth at the referee, who is really just a senior that thought it would be a fun time but now he has to stand arguing with you. And to Wooyoung's further amusement, the older boy who is almost two heads taller than you, looks like he's about to shit his pants in front of you.

Hm. Maybe not such a crybaby when it's anyone else but Wooyoung.

"I think she has a crush on you."

He turns to look at his girlfriend with a confused look, growing further confused when she smiles teasingly at him.

"Who?" He asks and she gives him a knowing look before nodding in your direction again. Wooyoung splutters out a surprised laugh, "Y/N?"

"Yeah." She nods excitedly, giggling, "She's cute."

Wooyoung scoffs with an eyeroll, "She's a kid."

A kid who might have a small crush on Wooyoung but still, a kid nonetheless.

He'd be stupid to say he didn't notice that you sometimes stare at him a little too much but what the hell is he supposed to do about that. You just started high school, you probably weren't even aware of what you were doing. It was a childish crush because at the end of the day that's what you are - childish.

Chaeyoung giggles again, the sound is soft and sweet, leaning her head against his shoulder. 

"It's kind of sweet." She sighs dreamily and Wooyoung snorts because nothing about you was sweet, "You're her handsome neighbour, the only guy who's always been close to her since she was a kid, she probably starts those childish arguments with you so you'd give her attention and then writes about you in her diary and-"

"Y/N is the last person to have a diary, first of all." Wooyoung interrupts with a snicker before looking down on his girlfriend who is teasing him, "Second of all, you sound ridiculous."

Chaeyoung lifts her head up from where it rested against him and looks at him seriously, her lips pressed together. Then she starts imitating Wooyoung's last sentence in a deeper voice that sounds nothing like him, "You sound ridiculous-ah!"

She squeals when Wooyoung pinches her at the waist lovingly and it turns to tickling her as he presses kisses to her cheeks.

As they continue to exchange kisses between hushed giggles, the conversation about you is forgotten.

-

18 and 20 years old;

From the moment you opened the door to greet your date, you knew that the whole night would be a complete and utter disaster.

Maybe you watched too many teen movies that romanticized prom night so much that even you ended up believing and looking forward to the glorified fantasy of it but boy, were you in for a rude awakening.

Your prom date was a boy from your Calculus class named Eunwoo. 

To be completely honest, you were convinced for the entirety of your senior year that you wouldn't have a date for prom at all because not much has changed since freshman year.

You still had one good friend (two, if you count Ryujin's friend that says she likes hanging out with you) and your focus was always on football. Add schoolwork and keeping up your good grades and you truly didn't have much time left for socializing.

So when Eunwoo pulled you aside after your football practice and asked you if you wanted to go to prom together with a handsome boyish smile on his face, your excitement for that night skyrocketed.

Eunwoo wasn't exactly a friend but he was nice to you during class, maybe you were wrong but his niceness sometimes even bordered flirting. Already, you were daydreaming about a possible boyfriend to spend your last summer with before you start college.

With a date or without one, you spend the bigger portion of your senior year saving up money for prom night or should you say prom preparations.

Makeup was never your strongest suit, in fact, it wasn't a suit of yours at all. You never wore it. You never did your hair either. 

Even on the rare occasion that you went to a high school party, you never wore anything else aside from jeans and T-Shirts. You were an athlete and you committed to the bit entirely, always being ready to sweat and opting for comfort of loose clothes above anything else.

But you wanted to look nice for prom, pretty. Not because of Eunwoo but for yourself. Prom is only once and you wanted to make sure you do it with confidence. 

All your saved up allowance went on the hair and makeup appointment along with your dress that Ryujin helped you pick out. The dress was quite simple in your opinion, a dark red one with a square neckline held up by two thin straps that clung to your curves and flared out at the bottom.

With your hair pinned up in an up-do with two curled strands framing your face and glitter on your eyelids, you thought you looked very pretty, beautiful even. Hell, it was probably the best you looked in your entire eighteen years of life. You could even put up with the painful heels for the sake of it.

Your dad made you pose over the whole house while you waited for your date to pick you up. First a photoshoot on the stairs, then one on the front porch, then a little in front of the living room fireplace. 

He seemed so excited with his camera hanging around his neck as he followed you around the house.

It was one of the moments you wished your mom was here for but nonetheless, it was much fun with your dad only as well. You were happy.

It all went to shit though once you opened the door for Eunwoo and he started laughing in your face.

"Oh my God!" He laughs, almost doubling over at the apparent hilarity of your appearance, "What are you wearing?!"

You laugh nervously, ignoring your father's glance at you from the sheer embarrassment, "What? Is it that bad?"

"No, no." Eunwoo shakes his head, wiping a stray tear that escaped while he was laughing, "It's just not like you, at all."

"Oh." You give him a sour smile, your fragilely built ego shattering completely. "I was just...trying something new I guess..."

He snickers with a headshake before offering you his hand, "Come on, let's go take a photo?"

After a small moment of hesitation, feeling your cheeks burn from the humiliation, you let him grab your hand and step out on the front porch. Eunwoo places a hand around your waist to pull you closer as you both smile at your dad's camera.

A couple of photos later, you both head towards Eunwoo's car as your dad waves you goodbye. You give him a small, almost sad wave back as Eunwoo opens the door for you. You ask him;

"Do I really look funny?"

"No, you look pretty no matter what." He answers, helping you with your dress. "It's just doesn't suit you I guess, it's not like you."

"Ah..." You say staring at the dashboard as you watch him round the car to get into the driver's seat. You glance back at your dad just to see him get back into your house and for a split second, you want to call the whole thing off and go back inside with him.

Of course this doesn't suit you. You were the girl guys dapped up in the hallways, the girl that was always covered in hoodies and sweatpants and never wore makeup. You must look stupid, all dolled up like this. What were you thinking.

Prom celebration is usually held at a hotel not far from your high school. The ballroom is enormous, with vast marble floors and high ceilings illuminated by golden, shimmery lights. It looks straight out a fairytale with colorful dresses worn by pretty princess and handsome princes in their extravagant suits. Only, you don't feel like a princess at all.

Eunwoo and you find your table and you briefly say hi to Ryujin and her date. Ryujin tells you how amazing you look and you give her the first (and possibly, only) genuine smile of the night.

"So," Eunwoo starts the conversation a few minutes after you settle down at your table with drinks, "Did you decide where you're going for college? Any scouts?"

"I'm leaning towards SNU. Their Women's Football Club is really strong and I feel like they actually get proper investments and budget." You tell him and he grins interrupting your next sentence.

"See, this is why I like you. It's hard to find a girl who knows about sports and is so chill about everything."

Your mouth stays parted, the rest of your sentence (which was really just saying that the fact the male football team was hot contributed to your decision as joke) went unsaid as his words registered. Every "compliment" Eunwoo gives you is starting to come off so backhandedly that you're beginning to realize that while he thinks he has you all figured out - he doesn't actually know you at all.

You give him a fake laugh and pray to God it doesn't sound fake enough for him to notice as you take a sip of your drink.

An hour later, your heels are killing you so much that you've completely given up on dancing. You observe Ryujin on the dance floor with her date, still going at it and sigh with the silent question of when it would be your turn. Instead, you're stuck to the sidelines with shoes that feel awful on your feet and a date that can't stop talking about how it's attractive that you're a "girl that actually eats". Eunwoo's compliments are becoming weirder by the second.

"Should I just take you home?" Eunwoo asks with an amused smile as he observes you taking off your heels for the tenth time since you sat back down.

"Ah, would you mind?" You give him an apologetic smile, feeling like a burden and a not-so-much-fun date, "I'm sorry, Eunwoo, this is unfair to you-"

"Nah, I had a fun time." He shakes his head, downing the rest of his drink, "Next time, just be yourself though, yeah?"

The weirdly phrased statement makes you pause. "What do you mean?"

"You know, you don't have to dress like this!" He laughs, playfully playing with the thin strap of your dress. You subtly move away from his touch. "It's not like you at all. I don't know if your friends talked you into it just to fit in but you shouldn't let them push you around like this."

He's so wrong that you can't speak for a moment but even if you could, you feel like trying to explain yourself to him would be far too exhausting and would lead to nowhere. Nor do you want it to lead anywhere anymore, if you were honest.

"Girls like that are so exhausting." He gives a tired sigh. "Outfits and makeup aren't the only thing in the world."

"Girls....like that?"

"You know! Like, the touchy-feely shit. Everything is about color-coordination and nail polishes with them. God forbid their hair is out of place. What a headache!" Eunwoo runs a hand through his hear before giving you an award winning smile. "That's why I'm glad I got to hang out with you! You're real."

"I'm....real?" You ask with a cocked head as your eyes start to narrow. He's too busy thinking that you like what he's saying so he continues.

"Yeah. You know, you keep it real. You're not caught up in that frivolous, girly bullshit. You're so chill, Y/N." He keeps smiling at you like he just gave you the highest form of compliment he possibly could.

But you can't bring yourself to crack a smile even if someone held a barrel of a gun to your temple at the moment. In fact, you feel like throwing up. You should've know from the start, from the moment he was so unreasonably impressed with your lack of makeup at the beginning of the year.

Eunwoo was one of those guys.

"Um," You slide your heels back on and grab your clutch, "You know what, you stay. I'll go."

"Wait, what." His brows raise in half confusion and half surprise as he watches you stand up from your seat.

"Yeah, I'll walk home."

"Wait, Y/N. Why would you walk home? I already said I'd drop you off-"

"No thanks. I don't want to get in a car with a sexist."

"What?!" Eunwoo reels back, "What the fuck are you talking about?! I'm not a sexist! I respect women!"

You huff, turning to him with a glare. "You respect women who are "cool" and "chill" and basically act like men. You should've just taken one of your dudes to prom if these are your opinions. I'm out."

So, that's how you find yourself in your pretty dress sitting in one of the plastic chairs of a convenience store with a popsicle in your mouth as you watch the cars drive by. You were too embarrassed to arrive home so early, you hyped up prom night so much to your dad - you'd rather lie and tell him you had a good time.

If the night couldn't possibly get any shittier, while you eat away at your cherry popsicle feeling undeniably sorry for yourself, you hear a familiar laugh followed by sounds of shoes scuffing against the pavement towards the convenience store.

Of course. Of fucking course, Jung Wooyoung would show up now, when you needed him least.

You try to make yourself seem as small as possible in the plastic chair, hoping he or his two friends wouldn't notice you (which in retrospect was a dumb hope, you were sitting right by the entrance in a fucking prom dress).

Ever since Wooyoung graduated high school two years ago, you only saw him in passing. He'd come home for Christmas holidays or a week or two during the summers and you'd only catch him skunk out of his house and into his dad's car if you were lucky. Unlucky, that is of course.

Maybe you were hoping he wouldn't even recognize you and although it would kind of hurt (as embarrassing as that is to admit), you feel like it would be a better option.

But since you were on a roll tonight, obviously this is just another thing that doesn't go your way.

"Nice dress, Y/L/N." You hear Wooyoung's voice speak, followed by snickers from his idiotic friends and his own attempt at stifling his laughter as they walk past you and into the convenience store, the small bell above the door signaling their entrance.

That ends up being your last straw. 

You don't cause another fight or yell something back after him, no, you don't have the energy to do that tonight. Instead, you feel like you will cry.

Tears are already burning at your eyes and your bottom lip wobbles, you're not even aware that your eyes follow Wooyoung through the display of the store, watching him as he picks up a pack of beer and heads for the cashier.

He got even more painfully handsome than he was when you'd see him every day before he graduated. His hair was double toned, the top of it black and the bottom strands bleached, brushing the nape of his neck.

You think you could even see a tattoo peaking under his shirt as he moves.

Jung Wooyoung was so not your type. Not that you really knew what your type was but all the guys that you found cute in your high school years were athletes, jocks who were organized and dedicated to their routine which in your opinion showcased their maturity, got good grades and were respected by their peers. Wooyoung was really the complete opposite of that so it was hard to explain why you so weirdly hung up over his approval.

He's still laughing about something with his friends, it would hurt so badly if it was about you, as his eyes dart through the display and connect with your own.

Wooyoung does a double take before his big smile slowly slips and dare you say, eyes soften as he looks at you and his lips part as if he wants to say something. 

It could all be in your head though and you're feeling even worse now that he caught you staring at him like a total creep, so you throw your popsicle in the trash and get up with a sigh, slipping back into your heels and deciding to just go home.

-

"Hey, Y/L/N! Wait up, I'll give you a ride home!" Wooyoung calls out after you, the plastic bag swinging back and forth in his hand. 

He can hear Chanwook's hushed objection which Wooyoung chooses to ignore, instead focused on walking closer to you. You couldn't make it far since you were basically limping in your heels.

"No thanks." Wooyoung hears your response and rolls his eyes. He hasn't spoken to you in the last two years at all but he can see that nothing has changed much - you were still too stubborn for your own good.

You didn't even bother to turn back and look at him, instead you hitch your dress further up and continue up the street and away from the convenience store.

"Y/N, come on. Quit being a brat and just wait for me to bring the car around."

"I said no!" You yell over your shoulder and let out a small yelp when you stutter a bit on your feet. To Wooyoung, you resembled Bambi right now.

"I'm trying to help you!" He yells back, still following you, "Just let me drive you back-"

"Wooyoung, seriously, fuck off!" You turn to face him with red cheeks and teary eyes (maybe that's why he's insisting so badly to drive you home, you simply look pathetic), "I don't need your fucking help!"

Wooyoung reels back at your tone and harsh words and then a wave of embarrassment washes over him when he hears Chanwook and Eunhyuk laugh behind him, at the fact that he just got told off by his little neighbour.

The embarrassment is followed up by anger that prickles at his skin like needles, he scoffs and if there's one thing Wooyoung will be - it's petty; "Fine! Limp home in your stupid heels then, see if I give a shit!"

You don't give him a response and Wooyoung doesn't bother to look for it either, instead turns around on his feet and heads towards his car (his dad's car). But not before telling a laughing Chanwook to shut the fuck up.

But once he's in the car with the keys in the ignition, he stares at the steering wheel in obvious contemplation before letting out a small groan, "Fuck."

Wooyoung turns to Chanwook, "Sit in the back, please."

His friend looks at him in surprise and confusion. "What?"

"Just sit in the back, will you? Please." Wooyoung repeats, avoiding Chanwook's eyes but feeling his stumped stare.

"Wooyoung, you cannot be serious." His friend laughs in disbelief as if reading his mind, looking around before giving Wooyoung another incredulous look, "She just told you to fuck off!"

Eunhyuk is quiet in the back which is a huge relief for Wooyoung, he really didn't need to defend himself to his other friend too.

"I can't let her go by foot in the dark, you've seen her! She can barely walk!" Wooyoung says defensively to both of his friends as Chanwook moves to the back with a huff.

"And that's your problem...how?" Chanwook, like the annoying pest he is, asks.

"It's not...." Wooyoung trails off, trying to look for an excuse as to why he was going out of his way to give you a ride home. "But...but her dad would kill me if he knew I saw her and didn't drive her back. It's only right."

Chanwook smacks his lips obnoxiously loud, "Sure."

Wooyoung doesn't even need to turn around to know that his friend is giving him a very bold side eye right now.

Eunhyuk snorts but doesn't say anything else. Wooyoung is thankful for that at least.

"She probably won't even want to get in the car." Chanwook comments quietly as they reach you on the sidewalk. He ends up being ignored.

Wooyoung rolls the window of the old car down so he can talk to you, he has to say you're walking at an impressively slow pace. "Y/N, get in the car."

He hears you groan dramatically from the outside, "Jung, you're not my dad. Stop telling me what to do."

Wooyoung ignores Chanwook and Eunhyuk's snickers in the back once again, he grows even more irritated, "I'll call your fucking dad right now and tell him you're walking home alone this late. How about that?"

You turn to him with your glossy lips twisted into a scowl, "You wouldn't."

Always ready to prove a point or in this case, lie straight out of his ass, Wooyoung makes a show of stopping his car next to the sidewalk and fishing his phone from the pocket of his jacket before opening up his contacts and beginning to scroll. He doesn't even have your dad's number.

But Wooyoung is a professional bullshitter so he keeps pressing random buttons with a straight face and presses the phone to his ear before turning to you with his brows raised-

"Okay, fine!" You exclaim with an angry huff and start rounding his car as your cheeks flush a pretty pink color. Wait, pretty-? You open the door and angrily plop into the passenger's seat with a glare directed towards him, "Fucking snitch."

Wooyoung ignores you, locking his phone without another word and beginning to drive away.

There's an awkward silence in the car, only sounds being made are those of the plastic bags filled with beer that keep rustling in Eunhyuk's lap.

"This isn't the way to our street." You say and Wooyoung might be crazy but you almost sound a little nervous at that. He glances at you before it dawns onto him. Of course, you'd be feeling nervous.

It's nighttime and you're in a car with three dudes older than you who you don't know that well. Wooyoung didn't even bother telling you about his plan before he started driving. A curse runs through his head before he clears his throat,

"I'll just drop these two off at a party nearby and then drive you home." He murmurs, chest constricting a little when he sees you cross your hands over your chest, a gesture which makes you seem smaller.

"Wait, wha-" Chanwook, gosh he was really pissing Wooyoung off tonight, starts from the backseat. "Woo, I thought you were going too-"

"I will." Wooyoung interrupts him with a clenched jaw as he pulls up to the house where the party is held, "I'll drop Y/N off and then come back, it won't take more than fifteen minutes. Now get out- Wait, give me that bag right there."

Eunhyuk hands him one of the plastic bags and Wooyoung fishes through it and pulls out two blueberry ice creams out of it before giving the bag back to Eunhyuk. Which he bought for himself, of course. Not because he saw your popsicle melting on the pavement or anything.

Chanwook watches with a dropped jaw before huffing, Wooyoung hears him murmur, "Doing it for her dad, my ass-" 

"I'll be right back!" Wooyoung announces loudly, far too loudly, and Eunhyuk slams the car door shut so Wooyoung can drive away.

When he pulls away, the silence in the car is almost stifling so Wooyoung offers you the ice cream, "Here."

You look at him like a second head just popped out of his shoulder before looking back through the window and ignoring him completely. Wooyoung lets out a small groan. So stubborn.

"Oh my God, just take it." He says, placing the ice cream on your lap as he continues to drive. He bites back a smile when he sees you stare at the ice cream on your lap for a long second before grasping it and opening the wrapper so you can eat it.

Wooyoung really doesn't know what he's doing right now.

He doesn't know why he bought ice creams for you, he doesn't know why he insisted on getting rid of his friends first before dropping you off home, he has no idea why he keeps glancing at you every couple of seconds from the corner of his eye and he especially doesn't have a clue why he takes the longer route home.

When tomorrow comes and he wakes up hangover from the party and probably in someone else's bed, he'll give himself the same excuse he gave the boys. He wanted to make sure you got home safely because it's the right thing to do. There was nothing else to it.

But in this moment, right now, in the stifling silence and the breeze that flows through the opened window's because the air conditioning isn't working - Wooyoung notices things that he feels embarrassed to notice, or maybe he noticed them before but never allowed himself to appreciate them until tonight.

Like, how nice your bare neck and collarbones look now that your hair is pinned up in soft curls. A thin silver necklace graces your neck. Or how the two curled strands at the front frame your face prettily. Your eyelids are painted with something shimmery which Wooyoung doesn't know the name of and your cheekbones are a soft peach color intentionally placed there beforehand. 

Your glossy lips wrap around the ice cream cone and you bite off a huge chunk. 

"Why are you staring at me?" Wooyoung can decipher the question even through the mouthful of ice cream as you give him a slight glare.

Because you're pretty. Is what he wants to say, honest and bare, but he obviously can't because you're you and he's Wooyoung. "Because you have ice cream on your nose."

His hands tighten against the steering wheel when he sees you quickly look to the side and wipe at your nose self-consciously. You blush a scarlet red from the embarrassment. Great, now he feels like an asshole.

Wooyoung clears his throat, "Why did you look so sad? Back there, in front of the store."

He has no idea why he's trying to make conversation with you. You two never do that, never did. The closest thing to a conversation between Wooyoung and you would be the arguments you'd have in the middle of the school hallway when he'd tease you for your braces.

Those came off as well, by the way, he can see the pearly white teeth perfectly aligned now as you speak. No longer crooked. Maybe he'd like to see them pulled up in a smile but that's borderline wishful thinking now. You smiling at Wooyoung? Yeah, right.

"No reason." You tell him quietly, slumping in your seat as you continue to eat your ice cream. You sigh with an eyeroll, "Just...prom sucked."

Likely thing to happen.

The key is to go to prom with your expectations so low that you can only go up from there but Wooyoung had an inkling feeling that having low expectations wasn't in your nature.

Besides, you were a jock. He remembers even when you were a freshman, you were already running with the popular crowd without even being aware of it, with the athletes and the cheerleaders. Prom night is sort of a pinnacle of the high school experience for people like you.

Guess it's a bummer that you look like you had a shit time.

He hums, "At the end of the day, it's just another Friday night. Nothing special. So even if it sucked, you'll get over it."

Maybe he wasn't the best at giving advice or comforting people.

You side eye him and he pretends not to see it before you quietly add, "I don't usually spend a year worth of allowance on just another Friday night."

Wooyoung cracks a smile, teasing you being a second nature even if you barely spoke since he graduated, "What? Did you expect a prince charming to sweep you off your feet so you two can dance the night away or something? I didn't know you were into that corny shit, Y/L/N."

He hears you scoff, cheeks still red as you roll your eyes, seriously annoyed, "Whatever. Forget I said anything."

Wooyoung's gives a forced snicker just to annoy you before his smile drops again and his eyes flutter shut for a moment out of pure frustration at his own stupidity, internally cursing himself. If shooting yourself in the foot was a person - it would have Jung Wooyoung's photo and name posted under it.

Why can't you just be nice to her?

The air in the car turns even more awkward and Wooyoung shifts uncomfortably in his seat while you continue to eat your ice cream in silence as you stare through the window.

He slows down in front of your house just when you're finishing your ice cream.

You crumple the wrapper in your hand, place the second ice cream on the dashboard and grab the small bag laying on your lap before grabbing the door handle.

"I hope," Wooyoung starts and when you turn to look at him, he's overcome with a sudden coughing fit which is really just awkwardness and the need to fix whatever the fuck he broke a little even more tonight, "Uh, hope you took some good pictures tonight at least because..."

He trails off, feeling like it was his first time flirting with a girl. Wait, what the fuck. He was not flirting with you. Not even a little bit. Wooyoung was simply trying to pay you a compliment. Simple as that. It doesn't have to be anything more. You don't even need to be friends to pay someone a compliment, in fact, Wooyoung is positive that regular archnemeses complimented each other at least once.

Unfortunately, compliments aren't the norm between the two of you, so whatever nice thing he says feels wrong.

Your brows raise.

"You know," He trails off, scratching the back of his neck in an attempt to seem cool and collected. He nonchalantly adds but his side glances might give him away, fortunately you're too much of a ditz to notice, "You look good."

You stare at him for a long moment, seriously it's so long that he almost changes his mind and adds an insult just so you two would be back in those familiar waters of bickering and teasing each other but then your eyebrows fall back down and a scowl overtakes your features.

"Yeah, right." You mumble and Wooyoung almost feels insulted for some reason but then you continue, "Thanks for the ride."

And then you're out of the car and already moving across your front lawn before Wooyoung can snap out of it and remember to turn the car back on.

-

19 and 21 years old;

"10 more minutes! Y/L/N stop arguing with that asshole and get back into your position before you're out of the game completely!" 

Your coach is red in the face from all the shouting and you know what's good for you, so you keep your mouth shut as you run to your spot, thoroughly ignoring the glare your team's captain shoots at you from your right.

The 'asshole' that your coach is referring to is the referee who didn't count a player from the rival team almost breaking your leg by bulldozing into you - as a foul.

"-stole Eunha's position from her and can't even play properly." You hear a snicker behind you and don't even have to turn to know who it's directed at.

Despite it being only your first semester, you haven't made the greatest impression on your teammates (nor did you try all that much to change that impression). 

So for the time being, when there was no rival team, you were the collective enemy in the changing rooms and on the practice field. A freshman who kicked their friend from the spot she had since she started college. A freshman who thought she was better than the rest of her team. A freshman who didn't know how to behave at times. A freshman that made them run extra laps because she was bad at remembering all the new rules at times.

And now, a freshman that was playing badly and fucking up things for the rest of them.

"Y/N!" A hiss from your right is heard and your eyes zero in on your captain, Jihyo, who is staring at you. "Focus."

You swallow harshly and give her a quick now before focusing your gaze to the front.

In high school, you weren't used to losing. You were a winner, it's what you prided yourself in. Failure wasn't an option when it came to football.

But turns out in college, when all the other players are as good as you, winning isn't as easy.

In fact it’s a lot harder than you thought it would be. Nearing the end of the first half the score sheet is still empty and it annoys all of the players and the fans as well. The weirdest thing is how ball is not even on your team's side of the field most of the time; your defenders did not have a very entertaining start of the game in comparison to defenders from Busan, who already look out of breath from all of the attacks to their side. Not to mention that they keep teaming up on you specifically.

You can’t pinpoint what exactly is wrong and why there was no goal to this point; half of you thinks it’s because you didn’t blend well with the team. 

"Run, run, run!" Yeonjin shouts, when Sinb loses the ball and Busan’s midfielders rush to their side.

The spike of adrenaline energizes you and your eyes zero on the ball, running after it. Mina’s figure passes from your left and both of you corner the midfielder, successfully getting the ball to your side. You have it and quickly pass it to Yeonjin, seeing her signal for the ball. You watch her run off when a body collides with your own and the impact is so strong, you lose your balance, falling down.

‘What?’ You ask yourself in disbelief not understanding how you're sprawled across the grass again, slowly standing up. At first you're shell-shocked but now anger fills you to the brim when you see that it's the same girl who intentionally collided with you the first time, watching you with a smug smirk and then you're just  ready to fight.

 You push back at her and get even angrier when the bitch doesn't fall. 

"Are you going to go tattle to mommy?" She asks with a mocking concern and you can’t hear anything; you even forget that you are in the middle of the game because your anger turns your vision red. 

With a loud groan, you launch towards her and grab her by the shirt, screaming to her face that 'she's a cunt'. There are hands around you, pulling you away, trapping you and not letting you go even when you try to break free.

Jihyo's face is in front of you and you can't register what she's saying but you can see her turn red from how pissed off she is. Maybe it's better if you're not listening to her, if you can't hear anyone actually...but then-

"Hey, number nine! You better not fucking cry!"

At first, you think the loud yell came from somewhere on the field. You thought another player from the Busan team was talking shit. And then,

"Number nine! Crybaby!"

There's some laughter in the audience and it's then that you realize the voice is shouting from the fucking bleachers.

A teammate is already pulling you in the opposite direction but your eyes are glued to crowd sitting on the sidelines, the annoying voice insistently yelling. Crybaby. Crybaby. Crybaby.

The worst part is that the voice sounds so painfully familiar, you just can't put your finger on it. Who.

You're about to let it go. You're about to be the bigger person and not act like a total brute on the field, just let it go Y/N. But then-

"Hey, hey crybaby!" You stop in your tracks, head whipping to the direction the voice was coming from and eyes coasting over the bleachers. "What kind of hill did you roll down from that you don't even know how to push someone back properly?!"

Finally, you spot it. Him. In a red hoodie, making sure to stand out in the sea of blue. It's no wonder the voice sounded so eerily familiar, you've heard it screaming at you for the majority of your childhood and a good chunk of your teen years. 

Because he rolled down the same hill as you with only a street separating you.

When he realizes that you've caught onto him, he gives you that smile. That grin that never led to anything good, pearly white teeth gleaming under the lights of the bleachers as he taunts you.

You blood pressure jumps so, you take a deep breath and....scream;

"Jung Wooyoung!"

[spicy30]

Back on our grind y'all! Officially back and I'm 14k words in. So give or take another day before y'all get chapter 12 of Moderness of 1400s

I'd also like to add that this story is going to very quickly take a dark turn and go down hill. So, I would say be cautious. I know some won't like it and thats okay. But this is a heads up! I've go ahead and marked every single one with a mature reading status.

(Idc if you're 18+ or not, I'm just saying, be prepared. I personally dgaf if minors interact bc I can't be judging ☠️ but yeah, just be on the look out.)

Anyways, a little crumb to feed y'll. Two new POVs unlocked.

Also! On all platforms that this story have been posted I've received many DMs and some comments about Aemond's characterization so I think I'd give you guys a look inside my brain as why I write him as I do:

In my personal and ever humble opinion. The way I see Aemond, is that he is rlly nothing but a over confident teen (He's only like 17-19 and 21 when he dies I think) that was way in over his head and draws power from hurting things that can't fight back. I.E- him burning that town after he got scared of Rhaenyra. He needs to feel that validation that he is better than everyone else. He's a young adult with a major inferiority complex bc of the years he got bullied, and even when he claimed Vhagar it still wasn't enough.

Lets not forget how he treated Alys Rivers in the books (maybe in the show too, but that another thing on it's own.) She was taken as a SPOIL OF WAR. She is a prize to him and nothing more. (Not to mention she prolly has those milkers bc she was a wetnurse and we all know that boy got MAJOR mommy issues) So pair those two complexes together and it makes an ugly picture of an insecure boy (Not man bc a real man would never act in such a way. Real men don't abuse those who cannot fight back.) who lets power go to his head real fast and bad.

In any case, no matter if it be in in war, or in a relationship where he is not the biggest and baddest around, it gets too real for him. So what does he do? He lashes out. Because when insecure things are scared, be it animals or people, they lash out to feel like they have some power over things.

So to me, the way I'm writing to him and how he's behaving towards the reader isn't at all strange. Their time line goes like this:

Meets her while she's essentially begging for her life.

Sees her a second time with a messed up face.

Sees her a third time with a mask that is quickly ripped away by Daemon during the dinner scene, then walks her to her room informing him that she did something to Daemon. Now let's recall that throughout this time, this was never in Aemond's POV. he never reacted in a 'omg she's so not other girls and badass that she did something to a prince' but it's more of a 'wtf you did something to a prince of the realm?' He doesn't like her because of that. He remains neutral to her because he values his lineage, at the end of the day he is still a pretentious Targ so for her to strike a Targ Prince (Even if it is Daemon.), it's not the best look.

Third time's when she is asking for his help. He looks at her like she's dumb because she has no money.

Fourth time she comes back to ask for his help again and this time she has money. Then she says these things he doesn't understand and it's then where reader stopped being some random low born girl who may or may not have money, and like someone who truly isn't like anyone else. Not just like in "I'm no like other girls, or I'm not like other boys' but in, there is no one who can compare bc I simply am and no matter how hard you search you're not gonna find someone else like me bc he won't unless magically some other person from the modern world ends up there.

Fifth time is their first time being together which she initiated because in his mind she liked him. On top of that, there was something he had never seen before. So being from someone he doesn't understand to being some kind of magical creature.

Sixth time is when again she is begging for his help because she is sick. And then they initiate the relationship they have which is transactional, where it is always reader seeking him out.

So all of these times it has never rlly been him seeking her out until recently. This relationship has always been unbalanced since the very beginning. Never have they been on equal standing bc then it simply would've never happened. To Aemond, all of this shows that she is a glorified magical creature that is his bc he found it first and she has always sought him out first (As far as he knew) so when it turns out she indeed had a life before him, she has Jace to help her too, he loses that power he has always perceived to have over her. In a fit of trying to get her to submit and make things the way they are before where she always comes to him, needing him, he lashes out.

(Though yes, it does seem kinda out of nowhere, I will admit that I did a poor job of foreshadowing it. I'm still making things up as I go. I have a vague idea of how chapters will be, but not every nitty gritty detail is. Sorry💔)

The second time he lashes out at her is now bc she is gaining more and more power. He will be in over his head when eventually she is at his equal footing of greater if things progress the way he's seeing them. Again he will be scorned so he lashes out now to keep her in place. To keep her stagnant. Reader has become a replacement that he is trying to mold to fill that space Alicent could not fill as a mother. To keep her needing him, to keep her with him, like a mother will always love and need a son.

So I don't think any of this is too OOC for him bc we have seen him lash out in the books and in the show. Along with that the treatment of Alys Rivers serves to back up my claim. I def don't think it's Yandere, I think that's just fr him.

But! I shall add the tag regardless if many feel it is needed! Anyways, thank you. That was my justification of his character and why I write it the way I do.

Lemme know your thoughts and if you see things differently. I am always open to criticism and discussion.

[purplepixel]

Sendin' one back at ya! (for some reason can't asks send from my normal blog?? Shakes fist at Tumblr)

Don't think you've answered it yet (?) but would love to hear you're thoughts on 28 for the tmnt ask! - Crow

Ohai crow! :] Ready for my extremely passionate long winded answer that's been in my mind for months now? Gonna respond with rise cuz that's all I read

28) What is one thing you'd like to see explored more in TMNT Art/Fics

CASEY JONES AND HER DYNAMIC WITH THE TURTLES

What is her relationship with each of the turtles, splinter, and April post seasons 2? Where is she in the aftermath of the movie? How did she redeem herself and earn the turtle's/april's trust? How does she feel escaping a cult? What is it like to experience FAMILY. DID SPLINTER ADOPT ANOTHER DAUGHTER?

I could go on. She is prob rises most underrated character, mainly bc she gets over shadowed by junior. Which is sad bc SHES GOT SUCH GREAT POTENTIAL FOR STORIES.

I am gonna call out fandom sexism here. With my full chest I fully believe that if she were a man, we as a fandom would have more works of her. Especially bc imo Junior is less of his own character outside being a fish out of water and his trauma of the apocalypse, yet he's got TONS of fan works. He's the bucky of rise if you will. Whereas with Casey, she is passionate, chaotic, loud, will choose FIGHT every time, overly eager, wants to prove herself etc etc. She is rise's version of Casey Jones to a T.

And yet for being a prominent character in the main series, I NEVER see her in fics. She is relegated to "extra character we needed cuz we're sending in the calvary" bg character with like one or two lines. The only time I see Casey focused stories is when she's attached to a ship pairing. Which isn't bad or anything, I just didn't bother to read those cuz I want THE FAMILY FOCUS.

I would love to see the classic Casey and raph dynamic more. We got a little in the show when they were enemies, but I want to see their friendship form. Enemies to friends. It literally writes itself. And Casey and Donnie would be SO CHAOTIC. Take the two most dramatic characters, put them in a room together, and watch the shenanigans occur. Eyse's fic is the only one I've seen do something crazy with them and it's THE BEST. A spar between Donnie and Casey where he ends up enlisting the wood animals to assist him and Casey is just having the time of her life getting to go all out fighting someone? Eats that scene

So ya. Casey and the turtles. I need more of them. If anyone has ANY good fics with Casey in them, let me know. Cuz I just have two so far. (I'm promised a third as of today but I haven't read ch 25 of Spiders web with strings attached yet)

Thank you for reading this long answer haha

[futureacesquad]

Captain Squad Headcanons

Warning: LONG post.

They all hang out on Skype the most because y'know...different prefectures lol.

The Miyagi captains see each other a lot tho!

The current second-year captains especially exchange advice a lot since they're newest to it.

Shibuya (Tokonami Captain; I'm just guessing here): Guys I think I accidentally started a disagreement between the first-years and I feel really bad about it, what do I do?

Futakuchi (Date Tech Captain): Look, I start 90% of the fights on my team so...

Towada (Ougiminami Captain): Our team just settles it in a death match.

Terushima (Johzenji Captain): We don't really fight per say, the gym just accidentally gets set on fire on occasion.

Komaki (Kakugawa Captain): Why do I feel like I'm the only one who actually has it semi-together?

Fr tho all the captains envy Komaki so much because his team is literally the only decently-sane one among them.

Like the biggest problem he has to deal with other than teens being teens is Asamushi getting too fired up sometimes and Hyakuzawa accidentally hitting his head on doorways.

As for dynamics among them...

There is a mutual agreement to keep Kuroo and Daishou separated at all times because the power of petty exes is too much for them (Iizuna is in charge of making sure they're at least 6 feet apart when possible).

The ONLY time those two have ever agreed on something was when some asshole started insulting their first-years.

The guy still gets nightmares about it.

Oikawa and Ushijima are also kept apart most times, though Oikawa's getting better at understanding him while Ushijima is starting to get why Oikawa feels the way he does.

They like to bitch about their fellow year-mates too.

Daichi complains about Suga's chaoticness and Asahi's timidness.

Kuroo complains about Yaku at any opportunity (though rarely Kai).

Oikawa loudly whines about the "disrespect" he endures from all the third-years (barring Yuda, the one who was crying with pride for all of them).

Daishou is fed up with how unhelpful his third-years are when it comes to any life advice (he doesn't have it together, but nobody else does either, sooo).

Bokuto likes to join Oikawa in his protest against "cruelty against captains"; the one he complains most about is Konoha, but the rest of them are still talked about very frequently.

Nakashima always follows up his complaints with something positive about them. Daichi is both jealous and in awe of this (little does he know it's a technique developed to stop Takeru from decking his siblings sometimes).

Ushijima doesn't like to complain about his teammates much bc he doesn't really see the point when you could just tell them they're being annoying dicks.

Iizuna's complaints usually aren't too bad and far between, but on days when Itachiyama loses practice matches due to the team's attitude...whoo boy.

Suwa is like...so calm? And his complaints are always so minor? And always with a completely patient expression? And the captains are so confused in the beginning because their only prior personal experience with Kamomedai is the few Hoshiumi interviews people manage to get and that kid sure as hell isn't this calm.

And then one day Nozawa is making provocations worthy of Futakuchi and he comes in complaining and everyone's just like there it is.

Echigo's pretty chill too, since Tsubakihara isn't a particularly rambunctious team, but some days Teradomari gets completely slandered for the dumbass moves he pulls during practice on occasion (he's trying to show off to the underclassmen; spoilers, it's not working, but Himekawa politely claps for him at least).

Kiryuu always feels really bad about venting even when it's clear he needs to (he was the one who put in the "no insulting the second or first years" rule since he felt it was unfair to the underclassmen), but he's getting better.

Him and Oikawa trade mental health tips sometimes.

The previous captains like to drop in sometimes.

It's canonical that the Date Tech third-years can't leave their underclassmen alone, so they show up most often.

The two Komakis confuse everyone to no end.

Ikejiri and Komaki H (Tokonami's old captain) show up the most for their team.

Ikejiri is delighted to catch up with Daichi (they start having monthly catch-up sessions with Yui too at one point).

Okudake and Akimiya drop by sometimes to make sure their second-years haven't convinced anyone to commit major arson or join a gang.

Moniwa, Okudake and Akimiya are highly respected by everyone for dealing with the hazardous sassy disasters known as the Date Tech, Johzenji and Ougiminami second-years.

[jenicon]

sorry if this isn't ok to ask, but how did you go about working for games? do you need to build a good portfolio and then freelance it? or is it a stable job at a certain company? or both? and did you learn 3d by yourself or did you go to some school? do you need to do concept art to do 3d art? i find im not very creative and get so overwhelmed but i'd love to do both, is that a sign i just shouldnt look into it? how did you choose this career path? have a good day

hey anon! It’s totally ok to ask! I’m pretty swamped with work atm so this is a refreshing change haha

How did you go about working for games? Do you need to build a good portfolio and then freelance it? I guess I got my foot in the games industry when I first got into art school. I was in a 1 year program for game art, with the program focusing mostly in 3D art. During that time, I had my first taste of making 3d art, did a bunch of game engine stuff, and even made some assets for movie quality stuff. As for the portfolio, it is extremely important to have one. Every interview I have had they would pull my portfolio up and ask me my thoughts, process, considerations, challenges, etc. for each piece. A good portfolio website to use is ArtStation. I am not sure which part of the game dev career you’d like to pursue, but this is mostly true for the art side. I cannot speak for the software engineering facet of game dev. Is it a stable job at a certain company? or both? It can be a stable job, but it most often is not. This career is notorious for not being unionized, as well as mostly contract work. Work hours can be brutal, depending on the company, time of year, etc. My time at EA was a bit of an outlier, we had amazing benefits (including dental and vision), a gym, physiologists, personal trainers, nutritionists, a VERY healthy cafeteria, extremely diverse teams, and just generally really good with work/life balance. I barely worked any overtime at EA, if I did I was paid and also got free food. If the team was doing a ‘team overtime’ to meet a deadline, our manager would get us catering lol. Also every Friday we had a buffet and drinks (including alcohol). HOWEVER, this was short lived as I was on a 1-year contract. It’s sort of an unspoken thing where everyone is fighting to get that spot for contract renewal. You get this sense of dread the months leading to your contract termination, having to look for a new job as soon as you can, or choosing to rest because of burnout.

Did you learn 3d by yourself or did you go to some school?  Like I said above, I went to school. It was hella expensive, and sometimes it feels like it wasn’t worth it. But I got the connections I needed there, and learned the ropes with much needed support. I never did 3d before I went to school for it. It was more of a ‘fuck it’ moment for me (my mental health was not the best then), and luckily I found myself loving my work. School is good if you need structure, or like you mentioned, if you feel overwhelmed by all the information out there. I think of my time at school as a first step for me. I did not learn everything I needed to know to get a job in the industry through school, but rather, I had to do my own research using the tools I was provided with by my time in school. It is a continuous learning activity; you will be learning new things until you die. Technology improves so quickly, you have to be quick on your feet and be willing to learn entire new workflows.

I find im not very creative and get so overwhelmed but i'd love to do both, is that a sign i just shouldnt look into it? That’s prefectly fine! I have not worked on an original piece in years haha. I find I’m not creative in the traditional sense where I can come up with ideas on the fly and imagine things up. I’m creative in the way I solve problems and think up ways to achieve certain effects/looks, and it bleeds into how I make tools as well. (ever see me posting 2D art? yea I barely do that bc I suck at it) You should absolutely look into it if it gives you joy. The thrill of seeing something you make move or come alive on screen is amazing.  Being overwhelmed is normal, and is completely expected. There’s so much information out there, it takes a lot of time just to sort through it, so take your time. Just be careful of being paralyzed by it into inaction; this has happened to me so many times. Just remember to take baby steps. One tip I can give you that I haven’t seen said out there: make your own documentation. I have a whole ass google doc of just everything I know about 3D art. It’s got sections for Zbrush, Maya, Unreal Engine, Marmoset Toolbag, Arnold, Python, etc. I add to it every time I learn something new. And believe me, you will learn something new almost every day. How did you choose your career path? What can I say? I just love making things pretty :) I come from a third world country, and the prospects for making art were... bad. I did not want to get stuck living a life working a job I hated, so I came to Canada to get into this career. Starting salaries vary, but to me, they were good enough and I had my eyes set on that. If tuition was X amount for me, my starting salary was close to 2X :)

I started in games, but am now working on a TV show for [redacted]. It’s been such a fun (but very stressful ride), and I hope to continue doing this for the forseeable future.

feel free to shoot me asks, I’m always happy to help a fellow dev / aspiring dev!

[verobatto]

🔥 Fire on Fire🔥

🔥Destiel meta 🔥

Supernatural 14x19 meta spoiler "Jack in the box"

Hello my friends, here I'm with the third part of my METAS from 14x19. First of all this is a Destiel meta, I know many of you are loosing hopes now... But I will show you this fight was predicted since this season started...

Let's see...

Oh! If you want to read the first part is here and the second one is here.

Foreshadowing the FROZEN STATUS of Destiel

So... Recalling a very very important episode from this season MINT CONDITION. Mint Condition showed us the path this season will take.. and they showed us too this image...

Thanks for this pic @weirddorkylittlediana

Those are Superman (Castiel) and Lois Lane (Dean) being frozen by the monster there. FEARS AND TOXIC BEHAVIOR Dean is having now, about Jack situation.

Remember when he choose to drink from the red mug twice? One on Mint Condition and the other in 14x14 Ouroboros. Bad decision Dean is back.

But I have more clues and foreshadow in Mint Condition... And thanks to @weirddorkylittlediana she shared this pic in our chat group with @emblue-sparks and @agusvedder and we just felt our heads blew out! I mean I was writing just the introduction of this and then...

STUART (Toxic!Dean mirror) saying... So handsome... So angry.

Yes yes maybe this??

Thanks @agusvedder for this gif!

But let's continue with Mint Condition, remember what Panthro (obviously Cas mirror) made to Stuart? Yes. He kicked his ass...

There was a fight between Panthro (Cas mirror) and Stuart (Toxic!Dean mirror).

And at the same time Stuart laid on bed... His friend was talking very fondly about him. And Dean remembered Castiel...

With the blue light in his face... Now... Please check this frame from last episode...

Dean is between two blue courtins (representing Castiel's wings) he is now who's trying to get through Cas, bc his words "You are dead to me" were a horrible way to release his anger on Castiel. But now is Castiel who's angry, and very angry, with Dean. He is walking before him, with a hospitalized guy in green (Dean mirror here as I said in my second meta), yes, now Cas is getting so mad at Dean... Frozen Destiel, break up of Destiel.

Foreshadowing the fight and the lovers separation

And everyone in the fandom talking about WHY DIDN'T THEY HUG???? WHY WE DIDN'T HAVE A HUG?

Well... Now in 14x19 and almost finishing the season, I can answer that... Beacuse it was a foreshadow too. A foreshadow of what we are seeing now, this fight.

And Jack hugged Dean, and then in Mint Condition Dean didn't wanted to come out from his room, and one of the excuses he gave was... Because CAS wasn't there... Castiel was with Jack. And he wasn't there with him. Yes... Like now. I made a crack post here about how they were having a crisis in their 10th anniversary, and that doesn't sound so crack right now, isn't??

And Dean remembering Castiel almost with melancholy here in 14x07

So my friends...everything has sense now... All the Destiel Metas I wrote... Now they confluencing in this season 14 ending...

And the fight is because of Jack. Castiel will take care of the kid with his life, because he promised that to Kelly...

I made a promise!!!

The thing that separates them is THE PROMISE.

So Cas is trying to find another way to save Jack and Dean wants to kill the "monster" bc he choose the red mug.

That's, my friends, is the break up and the lovers separation... For now.

"You love me but in your heart there's something before me"

These are part of the lyrics from the end of 14x06 Optimism, the meta about it is here. In this meta I predicted the lovers separation we are seeing now. The cause is the different way to try to solve Jack's situation. The promise.

But Dean saying "Panthro is mine" in Mint Condition, is showing us he is trying to get close to CAS again, after the words he said to him... But now, as I said, Cas is mad at him.

So... Dean trying to get close to CAS... He approached Castiel, very close, as he does always, maybe trying to rub his hand as he was doing till now (the moves).

But Castiel immediately looked at him mad like "Are you serious? We are in different pages now."

Here👆 (all these gifs by my talented friend @agusvedder )

Look how Castiel decided to move away from Dean, saying "PUNISHED BY HEAVEN" And then we had this one...

Yes... At the same time. Avoidance. Negation. No hands here. Not now. One in front, the other looking backwards.

Things are not ok. Destiel break up again.

And this frame here from next episode...

Just emphasizes more this thing about the break up, the good one is Sam is Castiel's side now, and Dean is alone with his plan... Another foreshadow I predicted (damn I'm sounded like a crazy fortune teller here...)

But I said Dean will be stay alone somehow in this season.... Aaaaand here you have the thing. Dean is alone with this plan.

To conclude

The fight, the break up and the lovers separation was foreshadowed since episode 14x03 when Dean and Castiel didn't hug, in 14x04 with the Panthro as Castiel mirror/Stuart as Toxic!Dean mirror. In 14x06 with Dean's POV about love and 14x11 with Mary and Donna (both Dean's mirror) talking about their break up and 14x15 with Castiel's POV showing us the promise is first.

So this fight and angst shouldn't be a surprise for us, Destiel shippers... Having faith in the other foreshadow THE TALK and my hands foreshadow metas here and here.

So hey! Let's see what happens. I think season 15 will be very interesting for Destiel, I'm looking forward for a Dean trying to redeem himself with CAS by rescuing him from the Empty or doing anything to kill the Empty and break the deal.

Ok I hope you like this. C-u later my friends!

Tagging @metafest @gneisscastiel @mrsaquaman187 @magnificent-winged-beast @emblue-sparks @agusvedder @weirddorkylittlediana @michyribeiro @castiellover20 @whyjm @koshisekisen @legendary-destiel @a-bit-of-influence @thatwitchydestielfan @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover @lykanyouko @evvvissticante @cheerstofandomfamily @drsilverfish @savannadarkbaby @angelneedshunter @trickster-archangel @dea-stiel @mybonsai1976 @hippyatheart80 @anarchiana and specially mention to @wayward-winchester67 I know you will love this meta 😘

Buenos Aires April 19th 2019 11:23 PM

[verobatto]

Capricious Children

AUMichael mirror of Lucifer, Amara and the Empty (14x10 spoiler)

Good afternoon! This is my second meta from Nihilism 14x10.

If you want to read the first is here and the third part is the Destiel meta I will post it soon too.

I know this parallels had been discussed all over the fandom, but I just wanted to talk about them, because I saw an image from "Nihilism" that caught my attention too, it was focused two time during the episode...

... I will return to this at the end of this meta.

Looking for Chuck's attention

When I first heard Michael saying he will destroy every universe bc he wanted Chuck to appear in front of him... I said... Not that line again!

Because...

Ok.. Deja Vu with Amara destroying everything that breathe, and torturing Lucifer (Chuck's fav son) like... 😥

Not just that, remember Lucifer in season 12 when he was possesing Vince Vincente?

Gif credit @morningstarendeavors

He decided to "have fun" destroying and killing people bc "he could" and bc God had abandoned him again.

So AUMichael and Lucifer with their Dad issues, carrying with the absent father trauma and Amara trying to caught his brother attention, are all in the same bag.

But talking about absent father, this is directly related to Dean and Sam with John Winchester, their ISSUES with him, and it has to do with CAS too... That's why Dean could emphatically understand Cas...

Manipulating minds

Lucifer was always the big manipulator in the show, he uses facts and re order them to fulfill his desires...

Gif credit @heavnofhell

But the blantant parallel between Lucifer and AUMichael, was that time when both of them wanted to win Jack's confidence, and win a powerful ally.

Gif credit @kingofthecrxssroads

This is from 13x23 👆

And this is from 14x09 👇

Gif credit @kingofthecrxssroads

Everybody wants the nougat boy but he is already taken by his three beloved dad's. So... Thank you, but not thank you. You can take your offer and put it in the body part where the sun never shines.

AUMichael and the Empty likes to use facts that aren't really totally true to manipulate and break "bonds", in this case ROMANTIC BONDS and FAMILY BONDS, bc doing that, makes the person weak and manageable.

Mocking the weaknesses

I saw a lot of gif set making this funny parallel from our villains mocking our heroes in love.

Lucifer and Michael are so alike in their way to mocking, but the worst of all of them was the Empty.

Gif set credit @godshipsit

Bc The Empty knew exactly what was going on there between Castiel and his feelings for Dean, so he tried to use FACTS to manipulate him.

Lucifer is aware of it too when he took possession of Castiel, and he used it too just for fun and mocking, bc that's how Lucifer character profile is.

But AUMichael, AUMichael is frustrated with that information, bc he can't understand the depth of it, bc Dean has it very hidden and repressed. Then AUMichael knows something is there between Castiel and Dean, but can't reach it.

So he mocks what he can't totally understand.

Pics credit @hhoneycas

The Empty and AUMichael are the same for Castiel and Dean, they reflect their dark side, they confront them with themselves, their true feelings, repressed feelings, and this is why Castiel and Dean fight back both of them. To release them from their own emotional prisons.

Now... Is time for speculate...

Let's come back to the pic I put first in this meta...

You know about pool, isn't? Ok... But in this table that was shown two times in the episode, there's something interesting... Pay attention to the location of each ball, their colors and the team...

There's three balls in the same line, the two from the lef are from the same team, one green (HELAING!DEAN) and one blue (Castiel) they work together for the same team. But there's one in the right in color red (TOXIC!DEAN) he is from the other team. And they are facing one black, the black is the ball that defines the play, and it could be any villain here... The Empty? AUMichael?, Then divided by the pool cue there's a white one. The white is the ball that hit the others in the game. So I could say this could be God? Jack in a future? Could be Jack the new God?

But this also makes me think about a foreshadow for what is about to come... And what was written in that book that Billie delivered to Dean.

Ok, listen up, this are just speculations, but...

We know those books talks about Dean's death, so... Dean doing a big sacrifice to save the world again, shouldn't be a surprise, But what kind of sacrifice?

If they go with the Infinity War parallel, should be something that Dean was protecting with his life, bc is powerful... Could be Jack? Maybe Dean must kill Jack for some reason related to the AUs. IDK.

Second spec... What if the big sacrifice is the follow ...

Dean is the cage, isn't? Like the cage locked on Hell with our Michael... What if the big sacrifice is "carry with that time bomb inside of him and jump into the AU from where Michael came and let the bomb explode" yes, just him, Dean saying goodbye to his family and to Castiel and jump alone with Michael (helped by AUKaia, the dream walker) and letting Michael there with him. But... That ball blue with the green one and the red one (Profound Bond) facing Michael/Empty make me think, are they two going together to the AU? Maybe Castiel wouldn't let him alone? Maybe? Or are they two going into the Empty together and fight him? And God there too... Are God/Jack the answer? Are one of them save the day? We hope so!

I'm kinda f dizzy right now... But you get the idea... I think?

Thanks for reading!! Please share your opinions!

Tagging @emblue-sparks @mrsaquaman187 @cheerstofandomfamily @magnificent-winged-beast @whyjm @lykanyouko @castiellover20 @evvvissticante @agusvedder @gneisscastiel @metafest

Buenos Aires January 20th 2018 1:52PM

[strawberrydracos]

Alright! Update! Played Mission 3, 4 and 5 today!

@technoblade-apologist-and-proud (I think I have to tag you in every reblog so it shows up to you, sorry if I don't lmao)

First off starting by answering your reblog! 1. Playing with expert controls reminded me of playing with motion controls in splatoon, it's hard at first but you get much better if you start off like that! Also I love to truly learn a game's mechanics 2. Dw about explaining the story sksksksksk I have a general grasp bc a friend already talks about it to me! 3. I'm familiar with the OST bc this friend also sends a lot of it to me and man. It's great, all of it. 4. My friend also also warned me about the dlc placement so thankfully I was already aware, can't wait to get there Now to the notes! Mission 3 started off well and then Jezz Bezos showed up with his amazon drones. I played well this time, didn't die at all, even if I'm still playing like a drunken bastard.

Always love the post mission cutscenes, girlie pop is talking about her life and big plans with the cowboy music in the back and I don't even know her name, girl who are you. Also Mihaly's doctor is voiced by the same guy that voiced G1 Michigan from Armored Core 6, what the hell honestly. Also I want to know how was the development process to choose Mihaly's full name. Did each dev just say a last name out loud and they just kept writing? I need to know. It's too funny.

Mission 4's briefing scared me. I had no hopes for my future. I was certain I would die. I faked my pilot ID and was suffering the consequences.

Piloting between the radars was impressively fine tho. First time I got fucked by the wind and crashed into the sea for whichever time already, but the second time I was prepared and managed to get around easily, almost crashed on the city, but things turned out well.

Second part of the mission was alright too, I did crash into the sea AGAIN while only one target was left but I am learning. Maybe I'll get a real pilot ID before they find out mine is fake.

Third part right after went smoother, no crashing on the sea this time. My squadron is fucking useless tho they’re fighting for their lives up there and I’m also fighting for their lives. Horrible job everyone, hit the showers.

And then the end cutscene plays. My honest reaction:

NO, MOTHER GOOSE NOO THEY’RE ACCUSING ME OF CRIMES I DIDN’T COMMIT NOOOO JEFF BEZOS NOOOOOOOO THEY’RE GOING TO CONFISCATE MY FAKE ID

I WAS FOUND GUILTY??? HOW???

They sent me to fucking. Narkina 5 dude. Oh my god. All my hard work... My fake ID... It's jover.

Anyways. Mission 5 started smooth compared to the others, the start of not having to shoot was pretty good to try and feel the controllers better, now I’m flying somewhat decent. So much for losing my ID...

Second half of the mission was going fine but for the first time in this I actually got killed from being shot at and not from diving to the ground/sea. I’m getting,, better,, I think. At not hitting the ground, that is.

I was so concentrated on flying around and shooting that I didn’t pay attention on the objective and lost the mission.

Then I lost the mission twice again because??? Idk, I couldn’t kill the last target in time? It looked like it had time so I really don't know what happened there. I managed to finish it tho.

Seeing everyone fly like crazy with the lowpoly planes at the end was great tho... Finally... I have found my people... (Insane criminals... just like me...)

I *started* Mission 6 but didn't manage to finish it. They weren't kidding, Long Day is,, long,,,, For once I really wish I had motion controls here, I feel like it would do wonders to my aim,,, For another I'm struggling to properly hit a bunch of targets in a place at once because the mobility of a plane isn't the same of a mech + it's hard to stay still, one because it's a plane, two because even when I try there's MISSILES TRYING TO HIT ME so I can't really stay still.

I'm having,, so much fun tho. It's genuinely really fun even if the controls are nothing that I ever played before and I want to play it more.

Playing Ace Combat 7

Started playing the game today! I'll go little by little and updating this post through reblogs sksksksks

@technoblade-apologist-and-proud this is for you buddy, since you asked :] Starting with Mission 1 and 2 today

(Putting stuff on read more bc I get a little self concious of long posts)

First impressions of the game upon opening it: Menu music is beautiful "Wow this is so. Graphic design. Wow." upon seeing the actual menus "Why do we have cowboy music on the cutscene?" Girl talking about loving the color of the sky instantly made me remember the damn "Don't you love the color of the sky? / Which one?" classic tumblr post. "That plane looks like a tesla" upon seeing the drone in the cutscene Started laughing for a whole minute when rave music started playing in the plane selection screen before the mission.

Right out of the bat we start Mission 1 with DEATH from controller. I didn't know what to press and the screen only told me about R2 to accelerate so I killed myself by crashing on the end of the take off thingie. This was a warning to what was about to come.

I need to publicly apologize to every Ace Combat fan that has ever lived because inverted controls make me feel insane so I had to "invert" them back to normal. I am very sorry. I have failed you all. Don't look at me.

Anyways, first mission went TERRIBLY. WHO have me a license. I was DRUNK driving in the skies. Absolutely dogshit piloting skills. I didn't know it did a neat little replay of the mission at the end + the replay with the tiny lowpoly planes. Humiliating. Everyone was flying to neatly and I looked like I was using my plane for a ribbon dance.

As someone that played Drakengard on the ps2 and Armored Core on the ps4: Piloting a plane is much more similar to riding a dragon than piloting a mech.

There's a lot going on in the cutscenes, the story seems cool and I have an idea of it already but by god they just feel so goofy sometimes, very silly, I am very lost.

Second mission started terribly as well, I still fly like I'm drunk, I died at least 5 times because I turned a little too much and crashed on the ground. At some point when I was managing to stay alive I thought I was gonna fail from the time running out because I just couldn't hit the targets.

Also. Did you know? In Armored Core you press X, Square and O for boosting and movement, and L1/L2 R1/R2 for your weapons. Ace Combat is the opposite. I've been playing Armored Core for a month already. My brain is having a hard time trying to grasp the controllers, somebody help me.

Second half of this mission went better than the first half bc I *am* learning but by god. I died once because I hit the ground again, I keep doing it, my pilot craves the safety of the ground. It was a nightmare trying to get to the targets to properly hit them but I did manage to do it.

All and all? Game is pretty fun! It will be a challenge to actually learn how to play, specially with expert controls, but that's the fun of every game, learning and mastering!

Had to stop for today but I'll reblog this once I play more :]