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finelinevogue · 1 year

Text

love, actually

summary - you’ve grown the most comfortable around Harry

pairing: husband!harry x reader

word count: +1.4k

The first time you'd met Harry you pretended to be someone you're not. Not in the sense that you faked a secret identity, but more the way you acted was nothing like your actual self.

He had taken you to a nice restaurant in the centre of New York.

Both of you were sat at the table, under dim lighting and a busy ambience. The whole place smelt of burning wicker candles and fresh food being cooked. Harry had been a true gentleman so far, kissing you on both cheeks upon arrival, helping you take off your coat and pulling out your chair for you. The way he acted made you question your own mannerisms.

Instead of slouching back on the chair to read the menu, you sat uptight and cramped your back instead. Instead of slightly man-spreading, you sat with your legs crossed. Instead of taking out your ugly glasses to read the menu, you squinted to read the words instead.

That was mistake one when a plate of seafood arrived in front of you.

"Y/N, do you want to try some of my burger?" Harry asked politely, but you didn't know whether he was just asking out of kindness and didn't really want to share his food, "I'd love to try some of your seafood. It looks.. Lovely."

You didn't really notice the pause between his words because you were too focused on how pretty he looked when he talked, but you said yes regardless and the two of you swapped plates to try each others food. What you didn't realise was that Harry had purposefully asked you whether you wanted to try some of his food because he could tell the moment your seafood arrived that it was your worst nightmare.

He'd never tell you that he actually hated seafood though.

After you'd repeatedly made sure he was okay with swapping foods, you scoffed down, as politely as possible, the rest of his burger. The fries and potato salad were added bonuses.

It was after you'd finished your meal that you regretted putting on such tight trousers. They were squishing your stomach and you wanted nothing more to open the buttons on your trousers to let your food baby breathe, but you were in a very posh restaurant trying to make a good impression on Harry - so button closed it was.

"I've had a good time tonight." Harry smiled at you from across the table, holding his glass of red wine in his hand.

"You have?" You said instantly, the words falling from your lips before you could stop them. "God.. Sorry. I didn't mean it like that. I just.. You really had a good time, with me, tonight?" You made yourself flustered trying to recover.

"Hey, Y/N." He reached his hand across the table to intertwine with yours, his thumb very subtly caressing a soft swipe against your skin, leaving butterflies in their wake, "You have been the best part of my evening."

And he left it at that. You thought he'd have picked up on the silly things you'd commented on or actions. Instead, he only looked at you as brightly as the flame from the candles were burning.

Now ten years later, everything had changed.

“Babe!”

“Yeah?” You shouted from the lounge where you were putting on Michael Bublé’s Christmas album onto the surround sound.

“Shall I take the roasties out?”

“Um,” You looked down at the timer on your phone. “Five more minutes, then yeah.”

“Okay.”

You walked into the kitchen to see Harry in his Christmas apron, which covered his Christmas jumper and blue denim Gucci jeans. He had a clip in his hair to make sure his hair didn’t annoyingly fall into his eyes whilst he was cooking.

Standing a little away from him, you mentally snapped a photo of this moment. Him cooking away and the starting sounds of Michael Bublé echoing through the house.

He smiled when he caught sight of you. You had left him in charge whilst you went to change into a nicer dinner outfit. It was date night, but the Christmas version and so you had decided to make a Christmas dinner between the two of you and get dressed up just to eat it on the sofa with ‘Love Actually’ playing in the background.

“You look beautiful, love.” His charm still worked on you after all these years.

“I’m surprised I still fit into these trousers.” You ran your hands down your thighs, before giving Harry a twirl of your outfit. The trousers were the same ones you’d worn on your first ever date with him and the jumper was the perfect Christmas jumper ever purchased. It had a picture of Harry on the front that said ‘All I Want For Christmas Is Harry Styles’ too.

“That jumper is awful.” He laughed, coming over to you to hold you.

“What do you mean?” You laughed back, in fake hurt.

“At least you got what you wanted.” He winked and you rolled your eyes, snaking your arms around his neck whilst his went around your waist.

A warm sensation cam over your chest at the anticipation of him leaning down to kiss your warm lips. You hummed a soft laugh when you finally got to taste him on your own lips, scrunching one of your hands a little tighter around the scruff of his neck whilst his hand on your waist held a little stronger.

You could feel him smiling into the kiss, making you smile back and lose touch with this lips for a moment.

“Stop smiling and let me kiss you, y’pest.” He told you off.

Both of you regained momentum and were greedy for one another lips. Both of you wanted to taste each other as closely as possible, tilting your heads from side to side as you explored each others soft lips over and over again.

Then your silly potato alarm went off on your phone, breaking you away from the kiss and reaching to turn it off. Harry cussed the potatoes for ruining you moment together, flushed cheeks, before going back to the oven to get the potatoes out.

Plating your dinner, you had never piled so much food on a plate before. You couldn’t even tell what was at the bottom, but you didn’t care because you were hungry and you were so excited to get tucked into your first Christmas dinner of the year. Harry’s plate looked very similar to yours, only he had the veggie equivalent of the meat you were having.

“Y’want another Yorkshire?” Harry asked, holding it with his fingers.

“Obviously.” You said like he was silly to ask, receiving it on your plate with a happy grin.

“Anything for that smile on your face.” He said, before pouring gravy all over both of your plates.

Halfway through eating your dinner you let out an internal burb, no doubt due to the Shloer you were powering through drinking, excusing yourself before resting your half eaten dinner on the table in front of the sofa.

Both of you had cosied up on the sofa, a soft glow from the warm coloured fairy lights and array of candles filling the room, whilst ‘Love Actually’ was playing on the TV.

“Full?” Harry asked.

“Just need my food baby to breathe for a second.” You said, whilst undoing your trouser button and zip until your little food pouch was showing.

“Aww. What are we calling them?” He prodded your stomach, making you laugh from how cold his fingers were against your warm skin.

“The Accident.” You replied making Harry laugh.

After you’d finished dinner and made it halfway through the movie, you left your plates on the table and you’d collapsed into Harry’s lap. Your head laid on his legs comfortably, whilst he kept a hand ahold of your stomach like he was protecting all the contents of it. He too had to open his jeans button and you had poked fun at his snail trail that started at his belly button.

“Oh this bit breaks my heart every time.” You pouted, watching Emma Thompson act perfectly on screen.

“I would never do that to you.” Harry promised, pushing his hand off your forehead and back through over hair, leaning down to leave a quick but loving kiss to your lips - even if you did both taste of a roast dinner.

“I know. And neither would I.” You promised him too with a small smile.

“Think we love each other too much.”

“I agree.” You nodded. “We make a very good pair. We definitely make the best, most stomach-filling Christmas dinner. And we always have the best evenings together.”

“And you’ll always be my favourite part of it all.”

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finelinevogue · 1 year

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distant promises

summary - Bucky has been on a mission for a long time and you miss him

warnings: insomnia, long-distance relationship, swearing, Christmas sadness (only slightly)

pairing: boyfriend!bucky x reader

word count: 2k

Bucky had been gone for 6 months now.

He was currently on a mission in the French Alps, taking down some military base that had connections to HYDRA. The mission meant a lot to him, not thanks to having been tested on and tortured with over a multitude of years. It had taken him a while to be comfortable with who he was and rid himself of the Winter Soldier. You could see him coming accepting himself for who he truly was more each day. He wasn't afraid of who he was anymore and it was an honour to have helped him through that.

It was currently 1 in the morning and you still had yet to fall asleep. You had been finding it harder and harder to fall asleep as the months went by without Bucky. It certainly didn't help that you were taking extra shifts at Starbucks, in order to pay off some debts you owed to banks and Bucky.

Bucky kept telling you to cut back on the shifts and let him pay off some of your debts you owed him too much already that you couldn’t justify anymore.

So insomnia it was.

You honestly couldn't think of what you'd done to deserve him.

Turning in bed to check your phone, you started scrolling through your Instagram to like photos on your dashboard. There were some pictures of friends who were out clubbing, singing Christmas songs at the top of their lung. There were also some celebrities posting magazine shoots and as always there were the cat accounts that you religiously followed.

You were scrolling and liking for about ten minutes before you had an incoming call from Bucky.

"Hey Buck." You sounded surprised that he'd called you. Normally it was too risky to call since he didn’t want anyone to track his phone and give away his location, but here he was.

"Hi babe." You could hear the smile in his voice.

"What's up?" You asked as you snuggled further under the warmth of your fresh, clean, duvet.

"I saw you were active on Instagram, but I know it’s really early morning where you are so I just wanted to make sure everything is okay?"

Knowing that Bucky kept tabs on what time it was where you were was just one of the small things he did which meant a whole lot more than anything his money could buy you.

"Yeah everything's good.” Buck stayed silent as you answered, knowing there was more to it. “It’s, um, just that I wish you were here with me."

"Oh darling, I miss you so much. I promise you it won't be long before I see you next." Now it was your turn to remain silent. "Y/N? Please don't cry darling."

“Sorry.” You sniffled, getting yourself worked up over something so trivial.

"Hey, no. Don’t apologise. I have to go really soon love, but I'm not going to hang up until I know you're alright."

"No need to worry about me Buck. I'll be alright." You tried to say as happily as possible, but you knew Bucky would catch on that what you were saying was far from the truth.

"Babe, you know I worry about you constantly." He laughed.

“Like literally ALL the time.” You heard Sam shout in the background, making you laugh.

"Is Sam there?" You asked Bucky.

“Yeah. Y’wanna say hi?”

"Mhm."

"Y/N I can’t deal with this emotional softie anymore." Sam said without a hello.

“Emotional softie? Are we sure we’re talking about the same man?” You teased Bucky, knowing that he most likely had you on speaker phone.

“The bionic-dude right?” Sam made himself laugh and you heard a grunt from what sounded like Bucky punching Sam. You rolled your eyes over their stupid playfulness, before Bucky came back to the phone.

"Yeah, that's enough of that.”

“Surprised you two have kept each other alive.” You laughed to Bucky, eyes feeling heavier now that you’d safely heard from him.

“Barely.” You shuffled again in bed. “Okay darling, I have to go now. As much as I don't want to I'm gonna have to love you and leave you. Just promise me you'll try and get some sleep?"

“As long as you promise to come home for Christmas.”

"I promise."

“Then I promise too.”

"I love you." Bucky just kissed the microphone to make it sound like he was really kissing you. You kissed yours back and you both stayed on the phone for another minute as you wrapped up your goodbye, before you attempted some better sleep.

•••••

Needless to say, when you woke up the next morning you felt awful.

There was still no surprise Bucky waking up next to you. There was a lack of smell on his side of the bed where he should be sleeping. There was no mess on his side of the room or whistling from a silly tune he’d make up.

It was going to be another day without him and with only a few days until Christmas, you were starting to lose hope on spending it with him.

Your scheduled alarm went off at 7am for your morning shift. You aspired to open up your own cafe one day and so you wanted to get the knowledge of how business operates and be able to tackle customer experience first hand. That’s why you worked in Starbucks. You were also taking an online degree in finance and business, to help you for when you open your cafe.

You got ready by putting on your black jeans and the Starbucks t-shirt. You threw on your basic vans and grabbed your bag before going out the front door to work. Starbucks was about a 30 minute walk from your shared house. Normally Bucky would drive you, because that's the gentleman he is, but because he hasn't been here you've been walking to work. It’s mostly a pleasant walk, but you hate having so much time to yourself and your thoughts.

Your manager told you that you'd be managing the shop floor today, meaning you had to give all the employees individual jobs, whilst help make the drinks and also be in charge of the tills’ money. It was going to be a stressful, but worth the experience.

Plus, anything to keep your mind off Bucky and how he was doing

It had been about 2 hours into your shift and you'd managed to get through with no complaints, so you’d given yourself a break. You weren’t feeling hungry just yet though, so you just got a cappuccino and went into the back office for your 20 minute break.

Not even 3 minutes into your break one of the employees came in.

"Hi Y/N. Sorry to disturb you but there's a customer out front who wants a manager to complain to."

This was a reason why you didn’t want to be a manager all the time, because you were really bad for getting upset when someone shouted at you.

"Ok. Thanks Nina. I'll be there in 2 seconds." You wiped your hand around your mouth to make sure there's no froth left behind and then went back out front. "Nina, where are they?" You asked her, as you couldn't see anyone obvious who looked like they wanted to complain.

"Umm..." She scanned the room. "Oh, that gentleman sat by the window over there." She pointed to a man who had his hoodie slightly pulled up and was looking out the window.

Walking over, you wiped your clammy hands on your red apron because as much as you put on a brave face sometimes social interactions gave you anxiety. You took a deep breathe before being prepared to get screamed at. Why anyone would want to scream and shout this close to Christmas you didn’t understand. Where was the Christmas joy?

"Hi. I'm Y/N. My colleague said you had a complaint?" You asked politely.

"Yeah I just wanted to complain that this cup of coffee is not nearly as good as the one that my girlfriend makes at home. So, why is that?" He turned around to you and took down the hood from his head and sunglasses off to look directly at you.

You took a step back, reaching for the counter to support yourself from fainting in disbelief.

Bucky was in your Starbucks making a "complaint".

You covered your face with your hands as you sunk down to the floor crying. You were so shocked that he was actually here that you didn't even know how to act. He laughed at as he stood up from his chair and slowly walked over to where you were crouched down on the floor.

You stood up and looked around to see customers and colleagues smiling and Nina was filming the whole thing. "You knew! Oh for fuck sake!" You cry-laughed, as you pointed at Nina.

"Surprise?"

You just shook your head. You could hear Bucky laughing at the whole situation - a laugh that you'd missed more than you'd allowed yourself to believe.

"Do I not get an ecstatic run, jump and a hug from my girlfriend?" Bucky joked, holding his arms wide open for you to be engulfed in.

"You're a knob!" You joked at him, shaking your head because you couldn't get over he was actually in front of you.

"Sam said you'd say that!"

You slapped your hand on your forehead when you actually realised what was going on. "What the actual fuck? You're really here?"

"I'm worried it's taken you this long to realise it, darling!" His arms were still wide open.

You laughed as you ran and jumped into his warm and loving embrace. You wrapped your arms around his neck and legs around his waist, whilst he wrapped his arms firmly around your waist to support you from falling. You started to cry again whilst inhaling his sweet cinnamon scent. He just smelt like home. "I'm going to have go on missions more often if it means I can surprise you like this!" He said, but you were too busy crying over the fact your best friend was back in your arms.

"You're actually here." You whispered into his neck.

"I am, love. I am right here." He whispered back to you, pressing a multitude of kisses to the side of your face. "I'm always going to be here." You didn't care that he was being the stereotypical smushy boyfriend, right now you were just glad you were back with each other.

You let each other go. Bucky wiped your tears away with the sleeve of his hoodie and kissed your forehead.

"I've still got like 2 hours of my shift left." You said, wondering what he's going to do now.

"Yeah, fuck no. I spoke to your manager and she was more than happy for you to go home early. With me, obviously."

"Really?" Your eyes lit up over the thought of spending the rest of the day glued next to him.

"Let's go home and get some well deserved sleep for a change." He took your hand and squeezed it, just once more for reassurance that he was home with you.

#bucky barnes blurbs #bucky barnes fight #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes imagines #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes one shot #bucky barnes x reader #bucky fluff #finelinevogue ficmas 2022 #finelinevogue ficmas #ficmas

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finelinevogue · 1 year

Text

winter solider, literally

summary - it’s your first time seeing snow and Bucky is more than happy to enjoy it with you

warnings: a lot of fluff basically, that’s it.

pairing: boyfriend!bucky x reader

word count: +1.2k

Thinking back, maybe you shouldn’t have run and jumped on top of an ex-asasain whilst he was sleeping.

Now that you were pinned beneath him he had finally come around from his sleep. Since sleeping next to you he had been getting long, peaceful, nights of sleep. Sometimes, like today, he wouldn’t even notice you climb out of bed and rustle around because he was sleeping so deep.

“Wha.. Why are dressed up like the Michelin man?” He asked, blinking his eyes because he thought that they were deceiving him.

They weren’t. You were wrapped up in over eight layers of tops and trousers.

You pushed him off you with ease, trying to fight your way off the bed with the heaviness of all your layers. Bucky sat back on the bed, letting the duvet pool around his waist and let the cool air reach his bare chest. You paused to check him out for a moment, before remembering what you original intentions were.

“Babe...” Bucky rubbed a rand over his eyes as he tried to wake himself up more.

“Come on!” You said excitedly, throwing a coat at him and heading towards the door towards the hallway.

Bucky watched you as you trotted off out of the bedroom in all your layers and waited for his mind to catch up. He was too confused and awake to go back to sleep now, even though it was just past seven in the morning according to his bedside clock.

“This girl...” Bucky whispered to himself, shaking his head as he smiled.

He got himself up and ready, putting on a few layers but not quite as many as you obviously had. Being a super-soldier came with its perks during winter. He was the Winter Soldier after-all, literally. His body didn’t react to the cold temperatures like a normal persons would, which was beneficial in situations like this where his girlfriend was dragging him out of bed at the coldest point of the day.

“Bucky!” You shouted from downstairs, making him follow your voice.

He rounded the kitchen door from the stairs and saw you stood by the bi-fold doors, ready to go outside. They were already open and you smiled brightly as you awaited him to join you.

In the time he had taken to get ready, you had put on your snow boots and added a scarf, hat and gloves. You looked absolutely adorable and Bucky smiled some more over seeing you standing here. He let his eyes take you in and reminded himself that this moment was yours to share and you were all his for as long as you’d have him.

The outside was blinding white.

Last night must have brought snow, since there was a couple of inches snow settled on the ground and even more flakes falling from the sky. It was serene Christmas scene and you at the forefront of it all, melted Bucky’s old frozen heart.

He never thought he would have moments like this in his past life as the Winter Soldier. He never thought he’d be able to survive the winters, constantly being reminded of who he is and what he’s done. But meeting you changed all that. You changed his winters to become something worth living for. You reminded him that the Winter Soldier was who he was, not who he is. In this moment and all the ones after it, he was Bucky.

For someone who showed him how to love winters, you’d never actually seen snow until now. Bucky knew that of course, which is why his tired brain was catching up to the point you were at now whereby you were insanely excited over the falling snowflakes.

“Stop looking at me and let’s go!” You laughed, letting yourself outside and treading into the snow.

“Yeah.” Bucky said to himself, smiling as he watched your face full of wonder as you took in the snow around you.

“This is so beautiful.”

“Mhm.” He nodded in agreement, watching you watch the snow fall.

If ever he needed a moment to pull him out of a dark place, he was prepared to remember this one for a long time to come. He wanted to go back and get his phone to take a few photos of you in this happy moment, but he also didn’t want to miss a single second of it. Choosing to stay he would later thank himself for, because the happiness in yours eyes would never be truly seen from a camera lens as well as his own eyes.

“Come on Buck.” You urged him to come closer towards you.

He wandered over towards you, where you’d walked to the middle of your garden now.

Once he’d gotten close enough you decided to have your fun with him and push him backwards into the deep snow. He shouted your name as he fell back, but all you could do was laugh. He hit the ground softly and left an imprint with his body.

He couldn’t even be mad when he saw that smile on your face.

Before he could even pull you down next to him, you fell backwards yourself. He sat up a little to spot you to make sure you wouldn’t hurt yourself. When you landed with a poof and stuck out your tongue to catch some snowflakes, he knew that this would be a day you’d always remember.

“I can’t believe that freezing cold snow could make me feel like this.” You said and Bucky turned to look at you as you kept on watching the falling snow.

“Yeah? And what’s that?” He asked.

“Alive.” You turned to face him and smile.

He softly nodded and leaned over to try and kiss you, but before he could press his lips to yours you shoved a pile of snow in his face. Your jaw dropped at how much you’d actually thrown and instantly felt bad, standing up in case he retaliated.

“Oh baby. Y’should know that snow fights aren’t something you’d win against me.” He chuckled to himself evilly, before standing up and lunging for you.

You screamed as you dodged him and ran to the side. Bucky continued to chase you as you drew zig-zag tracks in the snow. You turned to look at how close he was, screaming again before taking a U-turn in your movements and running the way you’d just come. Bucky grunted as he missed you again, before taking a chance and lunging to one side you could dip to.

Once you took the turn you thought Bucky would be behind you, but he appeared in front of you instead. You screamed again as he took you by the waist and through you to the ground. Bucky couldn’t find it in him to throw snow at your face or even bury you completely beneath it. Instead, he straddled his knees around your waist and leant down so his nose touched yours.

“I won.”

His lips were on yours shortly afterwards, moulding the soft pink of his lips against yours. You let yourself lay on the ground as his hands guided you through the kiss, pressing himself into your slightly as he kissed you a little harder. Your face and heart warmed up instantly and you couldn’t be more grateful that you’d lost before now.

“You win.” You said through shortness of breathe after Bucky had pulled back.

“With you this happy, I always win.”

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finelinevogue · 1 year

Text

don’t break my heart this year

summary - you break up with Harry but you live to regret the decision

warnings: self-deprecation, breakup, anxiety, family death, depression, but also fluff and a happy ending, i am one with hurt-comfort fics :)

pairing: ex-boyfriend!harry x reader

word count: +7.2k

It hadn't even been a year since you'd broken up with Harry and yet it still haunted you.

There wasn't a day that went past where you thought about how your life could've been so different if you had of stayed. If you had talked everything through with Harry. If you had been that little bit stronger. If you had given Harry a chance to explain how he felt.

Your breakup with Harry wasn't like most. Neither of you had cheated. Neither of you had fallen out of love with one another. Neither of you had stolen off the other. You had simply moved back home, to take care of your widowed mother and had lost contact with him. Your mum lived up in the top hills of Scotland, meaning the signal was dire. If you wanted to call anyone, including Harry, you'd have to drive at least 50 miles before hitting service.

It wasn't fair to keep Harry waiting days on end, just to have a five minute phone conversation with you. It wasn't fair that Harry couldn't see you because you lived so far away. He deserved so much more than you could give him. He deserved someone he could come home to each day, after work, and shower him with endless love. So you did what you believed was the most mature thing, and broke up with him. You drove all the way down to London to explain it to him in person, feeling like he deserved that much from you. He didn't take it well and neither did you. You left before he could ever really tell you how he felt, not having the courage to stay.

Since that day, you hadn't spoken to him. You knew it would hurt too much if you did.

Your mum wasn't doing well. Two years ago your dad had passed, due to heart problems, and your mum had taken it very hard. She was not in a good place, mentally, and you knew she needed someone to look after her. Being an only child made times like these hard.

Life had been hard recently, and it didn't seem like it was getting any better.

All your time was being devoted to looking after your mum that you hardly had any time for anything else. You were trying your best to study at online university whilst holding down tough hours at the local restaurant. Your average day would be 9-5 at university, but dipping in and out to help aid your mum in anyway you could. Then from 6pm until, normally, 1am you would work in the local pub. It was quite the drive from your mums house, but the money was needed.

In recent weeks it had gotten tougher. The work load from university had started to ridiculously pile up, to the point where when you finished at the restaurant you'd have to stay up until 5am just to finish off some readings or essays.

Your mum was worsening too. She no longer liked going outside by herself, because she was worried the "big, bad, world" might snatch her up just like it had you dad. You promised her she was okay, but she'd lost a lost confidence in herself and the world she lived in. Having a conversation with her was harder too - almost like you were losing her mentally.

All you could think about was how Harry was doing. Was he okay? Was he dealing with the breakup well? Or did it not really bother him at all? He was constantly on your mind, invading your every thought and you wished to have a moment away from him sometimes. Only sometimes though, as he quite honestly was the only thing holding you together at the moment.

As much as it pained for you to admit it, you truly hoped he'd found someone else - someone better. You knew the possibility of ever seeing him again, let alone being with him again, was shattered the moment you walked away from London. You'd left your heart with heart with Harry that day and you would be dammed if you gave it to anyone else. It was his to keep - even if he was unaware of its presence.

Tonight was just like any other night. Until it wasn't.

The pub owner, Patrick, your boss, had put you on an even longer shift today. It was getting closer to Christmas and the locals tend to come to the pub more often, sometimes even bringing relatives and friends from around the country. So today you didn't finish until 2am, having started at 5:30pm. It was tiring after a full day at uni.

You'd finished serving Alan and his friends their third round of beer for the evening, before getting back to cleaning up. It was getting close to closing time and you were beyond ready to go home now. Your mum would hopefully be in bed, but if not that would add an extra hour on before you could go to sleep.

Alan and co. luckily ended their night after round three, thanking you for your impeccable service as they left noisily.

The other staff members, who worked alongside you, had left ten minutes ago or so, claiming they had to be up early in the morning and so had to head off. If only you had the courage to say the same. You'd love to get off a little earlier, but it just wasn't practical.

As you were stacking chairs the front door chimes went off, signalling that you had a new customer. It wouldn't be an employee or Patrick because they'd all use the back entrance.

"Oh, i'm sorry we're closing." You explained, not looking over your shoulder to see who'd entered. You were focused on wiping down tables to rid them of alcohol stains, and flipping the chairs over to balance them off the tables so you could wipe the floor.

You didn't hear the sound of the door opening and closing again. Instead, you heard his voice.

"All this way and you wont let me even have one drink?" He teased you, making you freeze in your motions.

You turned around cautiously, prepared for anything because it could just honestly be your mind playing tricks on you. Maybe you were losing the plot, not your mum. How wrong you were, though. So, so wrong.

There he was, all warm and loveable. Nothing had changed really. He had a little bit of stubble, clearly proud that he had finally grown some facial hair. His curly locks were piled underneath his infamous Green Bay Packers beanie, the one you'd bought him on your trip to New York. His cheeks were a little rosy from the cold winters eve, explaining why he was also layered in clothes.

"Hi Harry." You warmly smiled, feeling a small red burn creep onto your cheeks now. You were nervous stood in front of him again and you didn't know why. It was just Harry, after all .

"Hello." He replied the same way he always does upon meeting someone. You felt like you had to shake his hand or something to break the awkward barrier you'd built, but you didn't.

You were so caught up in the beauty of him that you completely forgot you were being rude.

"Oh, i'm sorry. Would you like that drink?" You offered, after clearing your throat and dusting down your clothes, even though the last thing you wanted to do was make another drink this evening.

"I was only messing, love." Oh how you'd missed him calling you that. The mere sound of it again sent butterflies straight to the depths of your stomach. He made you feel like life was on an eternal rollercoaster and it was one that you'd never want to disembark.

"Well, I-I can't serve any food past—"

"In not here for food either." He shook his head softly, maintaining the comfortable distance between you two. The last thing he wanted to do was make you feel uncomfortable.

"Oh. Um, then what service do you require? Are you lost, um, because we have a phone out back that—"

"I'm not lost. I'm exactly where I need to be." Harry cut you off again, a habit you'd always found annoying but now found endearing. It was like he knew your thought process better than you did. He knew what you were going to say before even you did.

"How did you even find this place?" You asked confused. You had trouble finding this place and you grew up here, so how Harry has found it was an incomplete puzzle.

"I have my ways." He smirked his signature cheeky smile, the one which you'd fallen in love with. The one you were still in love with. You laughed and shook your dead at his idiocy but also his gentle humour. You really needed it after the past few months you'd had. The past few months that you caused. The ones that broke the perfect man standing in front of you.

"Irene?" You questioned your mothers name, not being able to think of another way he'd know your location.

"Irene, yes." Harry laughed at how quick you were. "How is she?" Harry continued, wondering if she was any better from the last time you'd spoken to him about her.

"Not good." You nodded your head and tried your hardest to smile, although it felt very unconvincing sat on your face.

Harry nodded too and you knew it was his way of silently telling you that he was sorry and that he hoped everything would get better. You were having a hard time believing him though. "And you?" He asked, stuffing his hands in his coat pockets to warm them up. He didn't understand how you were only stood there in a tshirt and cardigan, on top. Your tights and skirt were nice and toasty warm, but you were chilly up top.

"Okay, yeah, um you?" You quickly brushed past his question, not wanting to delve deep in to your feelings with him right now. Harry could tell you weren't okay though, no matter how much you told him otherwise.

He noticed the tired eyes. He noticed the stressed brain. He noticed the ever-slimming figure. He noticed the messy hair. He noticed the irritated and scratched skin on the top of your wrists. He noticed the way your hands were slightly shaking and your teeth were barely chattering. He noticed it all even when you thought he didn't. You weren't okay. He knew that much and you knew it too.

"Been better." He truthfully admitted, making you feel worse than you did before. You couldn't do right for wrong and it was slowly exhausting you.

"Mhm." Was all you could reply with, not having anything else to say because he'd heard it all before when you'd gone to London. You stacked the last few chairs and a thick blanket of awkward silence filled the air. You didn't want it to be awkward, but then again you should've thought about that before breaking up with someone you could never stop loving.

"What are here for then, Harry?" You wondered, moving behind the bar to maintain a distance between you two. You decided you'd sweep the floor tomorrow, instead of tonight, just wanting to escape from this shithole now.

"For you." He firmly put it, not sugar coating anything but just providing the honest truth.

"Oh-uh," you cleared your throat again, not sure how to continue the conversation, "any particular reason?" You stupidly asked, as if you didn't know the reason he'd travelled hundreds of miles to see you.

"Well it wasn't to come and shout at you, you'll be happy to hear." He joked, but all you could do was breathe a huge sigh of relief. You don't know whether you could take the hate today, even if you did heavily deserve it.

"Yeah, that is good to hear!" You joked along with him, but knew that wasn't the tone of what he wanted to talk about either.

"Hey? How about we get out of this dark and saddening, beer smelling, pub and go somewhere a little more fresh?" Harry offered, telling that you were desperate to get out of here and literally go anywhere but here.

"You have somewhere in mind, Mr Spontaneous?" You teased him, knowing that he will be useless in finding a good spot out here. There were plenty of good hideout spots, you just have to know where to find the best ones. You'd proudly been to them all and you used them as a place to seek the calm amongst the eternal chaos.

"Actually, I do, Miss Know-It-All." He teased back, earning a stuck out tongue on your behalf to him. He was such a little prick sometimes. "Go get your stuff and let's go."

"Okay." You bit your lip in excited anticipation. This could be either the best night in your life's history, or the worst.

Running to the locker room gave you the opportunity to let out a breath that had been wildly built up inside you, without even realising. Harry was actually here, let alone in the pub but actually in Scotland. Harry had been in contact with you mum, just so he could travel across the country to talk. God knows about what - or maybe it'll be about who he's now with. You were just so incredibly happy that he was here. For so long you'd built up this idea that it would cause a war if you ever saw him again - that he'd get angry at you - but it was nothing like it. If anything, he was being overly gentle and cautious around you - like he was afraid that he'd say the wrong thing and you'd make a run for it again.

The crew room reeked of sweat and it didn't take long for you to start feeling sick because of it. You quickly grabbed your overcoat and your bag before heading back out to the main restaurant area. Harry was sat at the bar, aimlessly tossing a beer mat between his fingers. He didn't even notice your presence he was that caught up in his own thoughts.

"You ready?" You timidly asked, internally asking yourself the same question. The answer was an indefinite no.

"If you are." He nodded and warmly smiled at you, assuring you that this was okay and it was alright to feel nervous. Hell, he certainly was.

"Okay. Let's go." He let you guide him to the door, like the gentleman he is, stopping to let you turn all the lights and machinery power off. Once you were both out of the door and in to the bitter frost, you locked the door tight shut.

"It's fucking freezing up here." Harry complained, and you knew it wouldn't be the last time he made a remark like that today.

"Tell me something I don't know." You rolled your eyes at the weather, fed up of the depressing cold. Jamaica sounded lush round about now - with all the swaying palm trees, warm sandy beaches and cooling waves of the ocean. Here, it was just hills, snow, hills, rain, hills and hills.

Harry lead you to his truck. It was one you'd never seen before so most likely had hired for the duration of time he was going to be here for. You wondered where he was staying, since there were no five-star hotels out here - only Margaret and Tony's B&B. Harry would like it there though. It sat proud next to a quaint stream and you couldn't hear a car even if you tried - it was the perfect retreat for a critically acclaimed mega-rockstar.

He opened the door for you, lending you a hand to step up since it was a large step. The feeling of his skin touching yours was a sensation that you could write novels about. A feeling that you'd so dearly missed and craved more than ever now. It didn't take long for him to enter his side of the car and start the engine up. The first thing he did was turn up the heating, noticing how your hands had been ice-cold when they touched his and how you were silently shivering. He noticed.

"It'll heat up in no time, I promise. In the mean time, here you are." He handed you the coat he'd just been wearing and it was still lusciously warm inside. It smelt just like him. It smelt of home.

"Thank you." Not even turning down his kind gesture because you were that cold.

"Trust me, still?" Harry asked you, setting the car into the right gear before looking across to you. It was painful to hear him have to ask such a question. You pulled the coat tighter over you, using it as a blanket, trying to preserve as much heat over your body as possible.

"Always."

•••••

The drive was a very peaceful one.

No commentary was made between the two of you, only the soft, mellow, tunes of Sinatra danced around the confines of the car. You could sometimes hear the passing of a nearby car or steam train, but there were no voices. Comfortable silence is so overrated - at least you for you it was uncomfortable. It was because you were terrified of saying the wrong thing as to why you didn't say anything, but also you felt like you'd said everything the last time you saw him.

Your mind drifted to London, as you closed your eyes, on that rainy Thursday eve...

I didn't think i'd be this nervous for anything in my life, but here I was.

His house looked bigger than the last time i'd seen it. The ivy growing up the walls looked powerful, as if it could tear the whole wall off if it wanted to. The pink front door assured me that I was at the right house, but I silently wished that it was a different colour because then I wouldn't have to face what I knew was to come. It was all going to be my fault though. I would most likely leave with a broken heart and the guilty conscience that I broke his too.

But this had to happen. It wasn't fair to him anymore.

I got out of the taxi, thanking him for waiting just a few more minutes whilst I collected myself and went and did what I came to do. He was very sweet and let me ride for a discounted price, obviously sensing my abundance of nerves, saying he'd wait for me to take me back to the station after this. He didn't say anything else to me, but he didn't need to.

The walk to the door, underneath the porch out of the torrential rain, felt like miles and yet it was only a few steps. My mind rushed through every possible scenario this could end up as. I looked back at the taxi man and he was smiling with encouragement at me, as if he knew exactly what was happening here.

I knocked three times - each one with the same amount of power.

The anticipation was the worst part. I wanted to scream, but also cry already.

The door swung open after 27 seconds precisely, not that i'd been counting or anything. I was so ready to start my rehearsed piece with him, but I was so blinded by his beauty that all thoughts were forgotten. He couldn't have looked better. He was standing here in checkered pyjama bottoms and a navy-blue crewneck sweatshirt, with little brown loafer slippers for comfort, and he still managed to be the most handsome man on the planet. He was so perfect.

Unlike me, Harrys thoughts were clear and his mind was only focused on one thing. Me.

I'd never seen him move so fast in my life. He closed the distance between us instantly and sealed our lips together to knock down the final boundary. His hands cupped my cheeks so desperately I wobbled back slightly from the force. His lips had never tasted so good. So sweet. The sounds of the pattering rain were long forgotten and the overwhelming senses bursting off of Harry quickly infiltrated my system. The sweet taste. The freshly-showered smell. The angelic sight. The tingling touch. The blissful sound. My senses were overwhelmed by him and I couldn't help but cry into the kiss.

He didn't want to let go, that I was sure of. Each time I tried to move back and regain air he whimpered, pulling me back as soon as I had caught some oxygen. This was our longest, most passionate, most burning kiss. In fact it was our last, most passionate, most burning kiss - little did Harry know of that.

"Where've you been, baby?" Harry asked breathlessly, between a further two kisses to my now swollen, cherry, lips.

"A-away." I struggled get out my words due to Harrys continuous kisses.

"I was so worried. So, so worried." He shakes his head not wanting to think about it anymore. I pulled away from his grasp, stepping back to create a little distance between us. I couldn't say what I wanted to say if I was too close to him. "Where are you going love?" He chuckled out, but there was a heavy tone of vulnerability underneath his words.

"Harry y-you need to listen to me, okay?" I asked, but even he knew that he didn't have a choice. All he could was nod his head, too afraid to say anything. He had a disturbing feeling like this wasn't going to be a conversation about how much I loved and missed him - no matter how true that would be.

"I-I think you already know where this is going, so i'm not going to sugar coat anything." Harry was already shaking his head at me.

"Y/N/N.. Please, no.." Harry continued to shake his head, realising you two were on the same page now and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

"Harry, I - uh - shit. C'mon Y/N." I mumbled to yourself, trying to hold myself together. "I love you, Harry. I've never loved someone half as much as i've loved you, and I never will. You have my heart - all of it. I need you to know that first, because it's important to me that you understand that," I watched him nod his head, "Harry, baby, I can't be with you anymore. It's nothing you did I swear. You were and still will be the best boyfriend to ever exist, because you are the most amazing person to exist—"

"Then don't do this, angel. Please." Harry butt in, tears now flowing down his face and it made it painful for me to look at him.

"Harry stop. Okay? It's not fair on you anymore. I can't be the girlfriend you need. I can't be the one you depend on anymore because I can't be here. My mum she's.. Well it doesn't matter, but she needs me more than ever and I can't leave her. Not now,' I watch Harry sniffle and wipe his nose on his sleeve, "You deserve so much more than me. You deserve someone who will give you everything, not that you didn't have everything from me - it's just I couldn't give you all of me all the time—"

"I don't care." Harry kept repeating like a broken record. This is what i'd made him into. I stepped closer to him again, cupping his cheeks to help him focus on anything other than his dark thoughts.

"Hey. You'll be okay. You don't need me. I was just someone passing by in your life, alright?" I pressed my forehead hard against his, and he cupped my cheeks to mirror me. If I could touch him then he sure as hell was touching me. He would savour every last moment next to me, because it might just be his last.

"No, Y/N/N, you're not. You m-mean everything t-to me." Harry sobbed out.

"Okay, but now you have to let me go. For your own bright and wonderful future, Harry, you have to let me go." I instructed him.

"No, no, no." He repeated and all I could do to shut him up was give him a kiss. The final kiss. I poured as much emotion as I possibly could do into the kiss, relishing every last second I had with him. After today I would probably never see him again. I would go back and live in Scotland, where the media is non existent, and live my life without my favourite person by my side. I would go back to working in the dirty bar and slaving away to the demands of university, all the while Harry will find someone new - someone better - and start up his wonderful life with them.

He was going to do great things.

I was the one to detach my lips first this time, knowing that if I didn't stop there I would never. I gave him one final, full of love, peck before pulling away from his warm embrace.

"I'm going now." I whispered, not wanting to even hear myself say those dreaded words.

"No." Was all Harry could say back. We both had faces full of tears and hearts full of hurt, but for now I had to be strong for him.

"I love you." Were my last words, before running back to the taxi out of the storm.

The look on his face was one that I knew was going to haunt me for years. There was no escaping it. He was utterly and completely broken - and all because of me.

My impending thoughts got interrupted by a call of my name. It was a distant voice, one that I didn't understand where it was coming from. It was so loud and clear and it sounded just like Harry, only when I looked at him his lips weren't moving. I'd left him broken on his doorstop and he couldn't do anything to fix the situation at- Y/N/N!

Again the voice repeated my name. Maybe I was having a stroke?

I couldn't stop crying in the taxi. The man knew to take me to the station, no questions asked. I respected him for that. My mind spiralled down in to a pit of self destruction and loathing. Every possible cruel thing I could think of, I could relate to myself. I couldn't stop thinking about the fragile Harry i'd left on the doorstep and—

"Y/N/N!" Harrys voice was much clearer now and it was obvious that you hadn't been dreaming him calling your name. He was standing outside the passenger door and it was only then that you'd noticed that you were parked up somewhere. "You're okay, you're okay." He assured you.

"Wha- where are we?" You asked, slightly dazed from the god-awful memory that just replayed in your head. It was a nightmare that kept you up most nights - it was one of the reasons you hated sleeping. It baffled you how Harry even wanted to be near you right now after everything you'd put him through.

"Come on and i'll show you." Harry held out his hand to help you back out of the truck.

The clicking of your seatbelt signified to Harry that you were preparing to climb out of the car and follow him. It meant that you continued to trust him, and that was more than enough for Harry. You grabbed on to his hand and allowed him to hold on to you tightly, in case you fell.

"There you go. I've got you." Harry spoke quietly, like he was afraid someone nearby would hear him. There would be no one around for miles though. It looked like you were at some outlook, somewhere, but it hadn't hit you exactly where yet. You were slightly disorientated considering how dark it was and not being awake for the journey.

"Thank you." You whispered back, both of you knowing it carried a much deeper meaning than you thanking him for helping you out of a car.

He pulled out his coat that you'd had wrapped around you, knowing it was too cold for you to not be wearing a coat right now. He pulled it around you, helping you slide both your arms in, before leaning down to do the zip up for you. He did it up teasingly slow and it made you nervous for when he'd reach the top. Once he'd reached the top he was stood so close to you that you could hear his heartbeat. His breath was shaky, but not as shaky as yours. You wanted to blame it on the cold but you knew it wasn't because of that.

He looked between your sparkling eyes and your rosy lips, being so indecisive of what he would rather look at. Your lips, he could kiss them for days, but your eyes - your eyes were something else. He swore they were the most precious things in the world. You were convinced he was going to lean in and kiss you, but he proved otherwise.

"Here," he took off his beanie and helped suit it onto your head instead, making sure your hair was tucked out of your eyes as he did so, "you're like a little icicle." He chuckled, making you laugh along with him.

"Thanks, Harry." You smiled sweetly at him, blessed to have him act so kind towards you. His heart was so big, yet so fragile as if it were made of glass, and deserved to be treated with all the grace in the world, but you'd managed to tear it down to its last shards - leaving nothing but broken pieces for him to pick up. "Aren't you going to be cold?" You asked, concerned for his physical health.

He reached in to the glove compartment, before bringing out another hat - a TPWK one at that. You laughed as he placed it on his head, finding it amusing how he was repping his own merchandise.

"You think it's funny? Me, wearing me own merch?" He laughed along with you, finding the most stupid things hilarious. It was just like old times - better times.

"Well do you want your hat back?" You offered, reaching for the bobble on the top of it.

"No. I like it better on you." He winked and it made you roll your eyes.

He slammed the door shut and locked the car with his keys, before stuffing them in his pockets. He took in a big breathe, most likely taking in the crisp winter air. It was refreshing, but something that was becoming all too familiar now. You needed a change. Jamaica, maybe?

Harry reached in to the open trunk of the truck and pulled out a regular rucksack. He slipped it on to his back before he held out his hand for you. "Ready?" He asked, not going anywhere until you took a tight hold on his hand.

"Ready." You nodded, eagerly grabbing his hand - wanting to feel those tingles all over again.

•••••

The walk, to wherever the fuck you were going, was exceptionally pretty. Harry chose well.

The path was hidden deep within a forest and it creeped you out at how dark and mysterious the whole atmosphere was. You felt completely safe standing next to Harry and holding his hand. He was warm and it warmed you up too.

No words had been spoken yet, only soft hums of a tune that Harry must be working on - seeing as you'd never heard it before. It was beautiful whatever it was. The eery night was so peaceful that you felt as if you had no problems left in the world. As if you mum was mentally okay. Your dad was still here. You and Harry were still together. What a perfect world that would be, but unfortunately some people weren't supposed to lead a perfect life. You were one of the unfortunate ones.

As you reached an opening of trees you noticed the lights shining more and more. They were becoming brighter and brighter the closer you came. Then it all started coming back to you. That tree - the one you fell out of whilst playing hide and seek with your dad. That bush - the one that you'd fallen in and cut your knee on whilst on a run with your dad. That pile of logs - the ones that you'd built many a campfire with, with your dad. And finally, that outlook over the valley below - the one that you would turn up at whenever you were sad with your dad.

It made you stop dead in your tracks.

"Harry." You whispered, finding it overwhelming that he knew of this place and how special it was to you. He knew that your father had passed, but you never really explained how it made you feel. You tended to bottle up all your emotions and keep them to yourself, finding it unfair to lay all your shit on someone else who might be going through things worse than you. This was uncharted territory for you.

"It's okay." He reminded you, bringing you closer in to his side with his arm. You appreciated him a bloody lot.

"No it's not. It's not and it's all my fault." You couldn't walk any further, not knowing where this evening was going and what Harry wanted to talk to you about. The guilt was eating you alive. "I'm sorry."

"Hey, no. Don't be sorry. I don't want you to be sorry, Y/N/N, okay?" Harry made you look at him, showing him to observe the small trickle of tears rubbing down your cheeks. You wished he didn't see them, though, because you felt selfish. If anyone should be crying it was him.

"But I—"

"I know what you did, I was there. Front row and centre actually." He laughed, bopping your nose to earn a laugh out of you too.

"How c-can you stand being near m-me then?" You were confused. You mum had told you that Harry would never want to see you again - charming.

"Because I love you." Harry put it in a way that was so simple, yet one that made your heart melt and walls crumble. He was still yours even after all this time, really?

"You l-love me? Still?" You had to double check, completely lost at how he was still devoted to you after all this time. After all that you'd said and done. Of course you still loved him, that was a given, but him still loving you was a terrifyingly happy surprise. He always has had the biggest heart of gold, and he remains to live up to that title. You were so undeserving of him and his heart of gold.

"I never stopped, baby." He squished your face close to his, large hands concealing your face to keep you focused on him and only him.

"You can't mean that, Harry. Not after everything I put you through." You whispered, searching for any signs of doubt behind his eyes. There was nothing but love for all you could see though.

"Listen to me Y/N/N. The last few months have made me realise something. It's made me realise that you're too special to me to ever let you go. Even though you made my phone miss your calls and we hadn't spoke since you went away, all I could think about was you and how you were doing. You didn't look good when you came to my porch in London, and you still don't baby." Harry was being completely honest with you, needing you to understand the complex depths of both sides of this relationship.

"No, i'm okay." You tried to convince him, but lacked the evidence to justify the statement.

"When was the last time you slept for a good 8 hours?" Harry asked, keeping you close to him - afraid you may dash at any point.

"Um, well—" You tried to rack your brain for an answer, but the answer was so long ago it was long forgotten.

"When was the last time you ate a proper meal?" He asked again, this time his eyes gazing down at your body. Yes, you knew that you'd become skinner but you didn't realise it was that noticeable. Or maybe it was just because Harry always noticed the most smallest, most minute, details about you.

"It was, um—" You squeezed your eyes shut hoping something would come to mind but you knew it was pointless.

"When was the last time you gave yourself a breather? A sit down? A bit of time to yourself?" He pressed for an answer, but it was obvious by now that you didn't have an answer.

"I-I," you let out a defeated sigh, looking towards the ground in shame, "I don't know." You admitted to him, and to yourself. You know you should take care of yourself better, but it's been hard to sort it out when you're doing a million and one other jobs too.

You two stayed silent for a few moments, reflecting on the words that had been spoken this evening. Finding out that Harry was still in love with you, in the area that was filled with fond childhood memories with your dad, whilst coming to teens with your mental struggles was a lot to take in in just one night. You could only take so much and you'd be forever grateful that it was Harry by your side right now and no one else. Not even your dad could come close to the secure and warm feelings that Harry gave you.

"I'm not okay, Harry, am I?" You had to ask Harry for support in your question, not wanting to admit the truth to yourself alone.

"You're just a little broken, baby, but i'm here okay? It won't be like this forever, I promise." Harry swore it on his mums life. His hands left your cheeks and instead wrapped around your body protectively, making sure you felt the mental and physical stability of him being there for you.

"I'm so-sorry for everything, Harry." You apologised for not nearly the enough times that evening - well technically morning. If you waited long enough you could probably watch the sun rise from this side of the valley - it was something you dreamt about doing with your dad, but it was too late to fulfil that dream when the time came around.

"It's alright." Harry shushed you, allowing you to carry on with the sobs you needed to let out.

"Is it?" You questioned, still not fully convinced that it was.

"I'll be alright as long as you are alright, love." You could feel Harrys smile against the side of your head where he was resting it, making you slightly smile in return. "Just need you back."

"If you'll have me?" You offered, wanting him to be positively sure of himself.

"Always." He replied, using the same phrasing you'd done earlier this evening.

•••••

Sunrise.

You never thought it would be so beautiful and yet you were so magically lost for words. The way the sun caught its first few rays on the glistening, snowy, mountain tops was cinematic. The rays starting to warm up your icy skin was exhilarating, almost like it was feeding you life again. Oh how your dad would've loved this.

What was even more special than the sunrise was the boy that you got to spend watching it with. Wrapped under a layer of three blankets, your back against his front whilst sat perched against a thick oak tree, you got to witness a moment so singular and unique, with someone as equally unique, and you wouldn't swap it for a million pounds.

Harry had brought hot cocoa, with little pink and white marshmallows, in a thermo-flask to help keep you both warm. He'd clearly thought about this "date", you guess you could call it, with great passion. He had thought of everything. He'd brought bundles of blankets, the hot chocolate, an extra jumper for you - your favourite one of his in fact - and even a portable charger so your phone was ready to snap some shots of the waking sun.

You were positive his body was completely stiff now, most likely going to have crippling back pains for the rest of the week, but you knew he didn't care. All he cared about was you and that you were happy.

Throughout the morning, whilst you were waiting for the sun to arise, you spoke about everything and nothing. You'd learnt that Harry had been with someone a month after your broken up with him, but went in to a two week period of self loathing afterwards because she, quote, "just wasn't you". Apparently he'd almost said your name, to her, the morning after and that's when he knew it was never going to be anyone else but you. Of course your heart bled a little to hear him have moved on so quickly, but you also remember encouraging it so you couldn't really be angry.

You opened up about the grieving of your dad and the hardship that your mum had become. Although it was hard to hear, listening to Harry suggest maybe taking her to a group house for family rehabilitation, or something along those lines, it should be an option to consider. He never pressed you for an answer, but only letting you know he was here whatever you decided to do.

You apologised a lot more times and each time he shut you up with his lips. God had you missed those lips. You'd missed him more.

Harry admitted he'd developed a slight drinking problem and had had to stay at random hotel rooms, for the first couple of months, because he couldn't bare to walk around a house that was so full of you and your memories. The kitchen, where you'd prepared countless morning coffees for him. The study, where you'd read a few stories to him. The bedroom, where you'd spent many a night with him beneath the sheets loving each other until you physically could no more.

Both of you were extremely vulnerable and that's exactly how it needed to be.

To move forwards you vowed to be more open and honest with one another. Harry promised to stay with you for a while, up here, until he was comfortable that you'd be okay if he left you. You promised to never leave him again, which he was perfectly happy with. You also strictly told him that he wasn't to go near a bottle of alcohol unless you were with him, not baring the thought of having to send him into rehab for substance abuse.

The two of you had a long way to go to be perfect, but then again there was no such thing. You were just Y/N and Harry, and as long as you made each other happy, then that, in your eyes, was perfect.

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