#following weeks reading everything about said guy. also i think ewan could her make the worlds youngest commie

[old-knightsvow]

smiling

[toomuchtimenerd]

Review for ‘The Queen’s Rising’ series by Rebecca Ross

I stayed up until 3am last night to finish this 2-part series and wow oh wow do I not regret it at all. Both the first book, The Queen’s Rising, and its sequel The Queen’s Resistance had pretty slow starts... but jeez once the plots got going they really got going. This duology was one of the many books that I had put on hold awhile ago. I think I originally wanted to read this during my sadgirl post-breakup phase exactly two years ago, a 3-month long period of time where I got broken up with, had an identity crisis, and proceeded to drop out of my sorority while fully embracing my inner nerd. Disclaimer: I loved being in a sorority, I really did. It just took up way too much of my time and I had realized juggling sorority duties and school left me with no time to pursue my own personal hobbies. 

BUT ANYWAY, I’m really glad I finished this series and really glad I took my time with it. The Queen’s Rising has a pretty slow start and by start I mean probably the first half of the entire book. But it became super complex with all the court politics going on and honestly it went from slow to holy shit whaT’S HAPPENING AHH over the course of like a chapter halfway through the book. The Queen’s Resistance was more or less the same, except with way more political twists (in my opinion, of course) and a touch more romance. Emphasis on touch, because neither of these books were romance-focused or even had that much romance at all, which was kind of a bummer because hello it’s me the lover of all things sappy romance. But I’ll get to that in a second.

The Queen’s Rising follows a young girl named Brienna who essentially gets dumped by her grandfather at a prestigious academy that trains young girls to become ‘passions’. This refers to someone who is master at one of the five subjects: art, music, drama, wit, and knowledge. Brienna’s mother dies before the start of the story, and Brienna’s father is purposefully kept a secret from her. Brienna herself dabbles in each of the five passions before settling on knowledge, which is taught by Master Cartier. Her biggest fears at the beginning of the book is not being picked up by a patron who will endorse the utilization of her passion, and unfortunately this comes true. But she’s offered by the academy headmistress to stay the summer and continue studying her passion, and the headmistress will try her best to pair her with a suitable patron in a few months. Brienna agrees to this and stays in contact with Master Cartier through letters for much of the summer when suddenly everything changed when the fire nation attacked. Just kidding. Brienna shares her strange visions of a Maevana lord from over a century ago with the headmistress, who gives her the choice to choose a strange man who goes by the name of Jourdain as her patron father. Brienna complies, and basically her entire fate is changed at this point.

So my first thoughts were that I really liked the sisterhood that went on throughout the six girls at the academy. Even though the book opens with the conclusion of their schooling we, as the reader, can still get a glimpse of how deep their relationships go. Ciri was a little bit of a brat, but I personally don’t blame her due to her unusual circumstance of sharing an instructor with someone else and Merei was LITERALLY Brienna’s ride-or-die. Obviously spoilers (because my reviews are always ridden with spoilers), but Merei’s role later on in the plot while they’re all in Maevana had me mentally screaming “YESSS SIS”. Cause honestly if I was Brienna, that’s what I would’ve done, especially when Merei shot Allenach on the battlefield. Well, maybe not if I was bleeding out on the ground but still. 

And how could I forget, Brienna the main character. I liked her quite a bit, truly, but if I’m being nit-picky then I definitely do have an issue with how her character progresses in The Queen’s Rising. Brienna starts off as someone who is clearly headstrong and determined, so I guess that’s ultimately the drive that keeps her going through the revolution and such. But I kind of felt like she went from “sheltered girl who’s only ever had time for books” trope to “Maevana warrior who is willing to fight and die for her rightful queen” a little too quickly. I get that she is half Maevan on her dad’s side (who is holy shit such a dick) but it just seems kind of abrupt for her to go from “I grew up as a dainty fair maiden in Valenia my whole entire life and don’t know anything about Maevana outside of what I learned from books” to “I’m going to beg the cruel king of Maevana for my adopted father’s safe passage back into the country and then when no one’s paying attention to me I’m going to scout this land I’ve never been on to look for a stone that has been lost for over a century and everything will be fine” all in the span of... maybe two or three chapters? We are shown that she receives sword/combat lessons from Isolde, the rightful queen of Maevana, but if my mental timeline for this story is correct then those lessons should have only been over the course of maybe two weeks. How much sword technique can a sheltered eighteen-year-old girl actually learn in two weeks? Enough to walk around enemy territory with a concealed weapon and be confident enough to use said weapon when needed? Errr... I don’t know fam that just doesn’t seem realistic. 

Another related issue I have with Brienna is that I feel like she embraces Maevana as her home incredibly quickly. In The Queen’s Rising we found out that Master Cartier is actually Lord Aodhan Morgane, the son of Kane Morgane who had survived the failed first uprising as an infant. He, like Brienna, spent virtually his entire life growing up in Valenia and was schooled in the passion of knowledge. In The Queen’s Resistance every other chapter was in Cartier’s POV, so we got a lot of glimpses into his personal thoughts and his own struggles with returning to Maevana. Unlike Brienna, Cartier/Aodhan really struggled with settling into Maevana, being a Lord, finding his place in a land that he didn’t grow up in, and trying to be a leader to people he had never met before. A lot of the first half of The Queen’s Resistance was centered around Cartier/Aodhan’s inner turmoil in these regards, whereas Brienna (in BOTH books) never seemed to have this struggle despite having a very similar upbringing. Brienna just seems to fit right into Maevana in a way that doesn’t seem particularly realistic or natural given the circumstances that surround her upbringing. 

Now onto the romance! The romance is all centered between Brienna and Cartier, and there are some subtle hints at the beginning of The Queen’s Rising that indicates this is the main relationship throughout the story. However, like the plot this relationship does not really exist or evolve in any way until after the halfway point of the book, when Brienna finds out that Cartier and Lord Morgane are one and the same. Which, by the way, came as a HUGE shocker to me. I DEFINITELY did not see that coming. I assumed Cartier would show up in Maevana in some way or another, but definitely not like that. It was a great twist though, and having both Brienna and Cartier in Allenach’s castle made for a great yet somewhat slow-burn romance. Admittedly, the romance aspect was pretty negligible in The Queen’s Rising. There’s a little bit more emphasis on their relationship in the sequel, but even then it’s not all that much... unfortunately. I really liked these two, and I thought the matching constellations on their passion cloaks were JUST SO DAMN TOUCHING. And the ending of The Queen’s Resistance with the whole golden thread tradition low key had me clutching my chest for a solid two seconds. So the final verdict here is that for the little bits of romance that this series featured, it was beautiful. But ultimately romance wasn’t the focus, nor was it even an emphasis, and if I could have things my way I would’ve definitely liked there to be a little more romance building and one-on-one moments between the pair.

Let’s see... I’m racking my memory for any notable thoughts on some of the side characters. Not gonna lie, Isolde fell pretty flat to me and despite her being the queen I personally could not bring myself to care all that much for her. Luc was a jolly guy, but again not very notable or stand-out-ish in a good way. While it doesn’t bother me, I do have to ask what was the point of Neeve’s character? She shows up in The Queen’s Resistance, and we learn pretty early on that she’s actually another one of Brienna’s half siblings through her father. I don’t understand why Neeve was cast aside by Allenach, after all wasn’t she a daughter that he so desperately wanted? Illegitimacy didn’t matter to him anyway, he could’ve just legitimized her and the fact that Neeve’s mother was dead meant that Allenach didn’t need to worry about anyone influencing Neeve aside from himself. Was Allenach banking THAT much on Brienna? I dunno, none of Neeve’s backstory really makes sense to me or brings much value to the plot either. I like the character just fine, I just don’t understand her purpose... aside from being a long-lost half-sister to the main character. 

I also kept thinking Sean Allenach would eventually betray the queen’s side but he never did, which also makes little sense to me. I mean I guess deep down he really is just a good kid, but it just seems so unlikely for that to be the case when both his older brother and his father are incredibly cruel people. I understood why Ewan and Keela didn’t take after their father, Declan Lannon, because after all they always had each other and they had Tomas who was always a good guy trying to set them on a better path. So for Sean, who seemingly did not have any kind of positive influence to counter the shitty influence that is his brother and father, to be such a kind person willing to undermine his own father’s power just seems statistically unlikely I guess?

And finally, the ending of The Queen’s Resistance with the whole thing about Cartier/Aodhan’s mother still being alive was... good GOD. She was the bone sweeper??? SERIOUSLY? Now that’s a fucking plot twist that I would’ve never saw coming. My heart definitely hurt for Lile, and her written account of what had happened to her over the last 25 years nearly brought tears to my eyes. I do wonder though, when Declan said he loved Lile was he referring to romantic love or the love shared between a mother and son? I was assuming the second type of love, since Declan kept referring to Cartier/Aodhan as ‘brother’. But in Lile’s written account of what happened in her life she writes that she took the Lannon name after ten years in the dungeons. I feel like there’s a lot of ambiguity as to what that actually means. Did she essentially become Declan’s consort? Or did she remain a motherly figure to him and her sharing Declan’s family name made it more real for him? I hope it’s the second one, because I would feel VERY uncomfortable if it were the first case.

When I started this series, I thought I had it all figured out. I guessed that Brienna was the rightful Kavanagh queen within the first chapter, but little did I know the author wanted to tell the story about the queen’s right hand woman, not the queen herself. Which is a very unique approach to a story and I think Ross did quite well (despite the queen herself falling flat as a character. Perhaps some sacrifices need to be made if the story is to emphasize someone other than the queen). Again, I do wish there was a bigger emphasis on Brienna and Cartier’s relationship. I enjoyed Brienna enough, but I simply adored Cartier/Aodhan and I admit I really wanted to see more interactions between the two through Cartier’s POV. I almost wish the last chapter of The Queen’s Resistance was written in Cartier’s POV because I wanted to know what thoughts swirled through his head while he was looking for the golden thread in the tapestry. Petitioning for a prequel novella, completely through Cartier’s POV, during the seven years he spent watching Brienna grow up dabbling in other passions before choosing to become a passion of knowledge. I would pay dumb money to read this. And I would go broke, because I would pay a lot of money to read a lot of things. 

[navalcriminalimagines]

Carisi's Wedding, part 3

Thank you so much for all the comments!! I appreciate it so much ❤️

Tag list (if you want to get tagged, just let me know!!) : @inlovewith3 @naniky @lifeisbetterwithbarba @dreila03

"Is there something I should know?" Julia simply asked. She looked calm. That may you wondered what she actually heard. Dominick and you stayed silent for long seconds before you decided you should saved things before a disaster.

"Okay- to be honest, Junior and I had a thing many years ago. But it was nothing serious, it didn't last. Luckily, cause now you two are getting married. And I'm very happy for this Italian spaghetti." You smiled to Dominick. This was the best thing to do.

"Why didn't you tell me Sonny?" She asked.

"My fault," you answered before him. He felt embarrassed and lost, he could totally messed everything up if he opens his mouth. "I asked him not to," Find a reason. Anything. "I'm dating his co-worker. Rafael, I don't know if Junior talked about him? He is kinda jealous and he is invited too. I didn't want this to be awkward," you paused. "just like right now," you whispered. You hoped this would work.

"Is it right, babe?" babe. You felt both weird and relieved.

"Yes, and like she said, it wasn't important, so we thought it was better not talking about it." It hurts to hear him saying this, but this ain't about you.

"O-okay, I believe you. But I would like to meet your boyfriend later," This wasn't a request.

"Of course!" You smiled. "But hey! You are not supposed to see her," you tried to end this conversation and put your hand to cover Dominick's eyes. You surprised him that he almost took a step back. "You have to go," you said to Julia.

"I'm not sure, I prefer him to leave."

"Baby, it's okay. We'll see each other at the autel, and you'll become Mrs. Carisi, alright?" Julia sighed but nodded.

"Can I kiss him, at least?"

"Sure! But Junior, if you open your eyes, you won't be able to have another child." Act like the annoying friend. You took your hand off Dominick's face to let them kiss. You actually looked away while they did. Doubtfully, Julia left you and her soon-to-be husband alone.

"That was close!" You shyly smiled.

"So you're dating him?"

"Damn it Dominick! I saved your ass," you were exasperated by his behavior.

"I didn't ask you to, Y/N!"

"Okay, I can find her again and tell her the truth if you want?"

"Now you are going to pretend to be in love with Barba all night long. I- I don't want to see this." Dominick looked like he wasn't sure about his wedding at this very moment. No matter how hard it was, it couldn't happen. For the baby.

"For god sakes! You are the one that is going to get married. Hear me? Ma-rried. Don't you think it's too late for this?"

"I'm scared, doll." He found a chair in the hallway and sat there, taking his head in his hands. You followed him, grabbed his hands and hold them.

"That's what marriage does. It's okay to be scared, but everything is going to be alright," you smiled to comfort him.

"I'm not scared about this. I'm scared that Barba, or someone else, will be able to do what I've never- been able to." You put your knees down before your position hurts.

"Settle me down?" you murmured.

"Ya," Dominick breathed out. "Why this isn't about you and me? Why did you never stay?" You could see tears in his eyes, so you put one of your hand on his cheek and caressed it with your thumb.

"You never asked me to."

"Gosh, I did it some many times y/n! But you always left."

"Saying "I wish" isn't the same as "I don't want you to leave again, can you stay with me forever?""

"You knew that's what I wanted. I loved you so much, I've waited for you for so long."

"Untrue. You dated other girls,"

"Yea, I did. Did it last? No. Cause all I wanted-"

"But you dated anyway." you cut him "I've never dated anyone but you."

"Says the girl that had a nice dinner with Ewan McGregor." Dominick rolled his eyes.

"I did but we didn't date. I never loved him or someone else. It was always you."

"Aaaand we go back to the start. Why didn't you stay?" it was your turn to have tears. You could hear how broken Dominick was in his voice.

"I was- scared." He knew your past, what you have been through so it didn't take him long to figure out why.

"Not all men are like your father, Y/N. And I wouldn't have gave up on you like your mum did." his voice was soft but hearing this made you cry. Dominick immediately wiped your tears with his thumbs.

"They broke me, Dom- I don't believe in love, in trust, in faithful or even in family. And this has nothing to do with you."

"Somehow, it does. I never been able to make believe in those things. I failed."

"Does it matter now? You found someone. She is carrying your child. Maybe it didn't work for a reason. Maybe-- we were not meant to be, Dominick."

Saying those words broke your heart in pieces and Dominick's too. He didn't say anything, just got up in one move and disappeared shortly after. You stayed there in the hallway, crying at first and then trying to calm down, until you heard your phone buzzing in your purse.

[From Rafael] : Almost there with the squad. You ready, beautiful ? Can't wait to see you.

This gave you a slight smile. You missed your chance with Dominick but maybe Rafael was your second? This man is as broken as you are, even if it's for different reasons. He understood things that Dominick never did. Not wanting so much from Rafael may be the way to make things work. But it may also not be the time and place to think about it.

[To Rafael] : Act like my boyfriend and a jealous one. Will explain to you later. Can't wait to see you too.

[From Rafael] : No problemo mi amor 😉 would've done it without explanations. See you in a minute.

"Wow... You look-wow." It was the first time the squad saw Rafael out of words. Literally speechless. He softly hugged and kissed you. It helped you feeling better.

"Never thought someone could make him shut up." Fin joked. You quickly hugged them too. You already met them before, introduced as Carisi's best friend. But a part of you keep thinking that Amanda knows the truth.

"How is he?" Liv asked.

"Stressed. Nervous. About to have a heart attack I think." Nobody has to know about the conversation you had, and how he truly feels.

"Great. As if normal Carisi wasn't hard enough to deal with," Rafael smirked and it made you smile. He will definitely help you going through this, without doing it on purpose.

Before the ceremony, you sat next to Rafael at the fifth row. Bella came to see you and asked for you to move with them in front, "Trust me, it's better I stay here," you said. And she noticed your fingers intertwined with Rafael's, so she left.

"Are you okay?" he whispered in your ear.

"Better now that you're here."

"I won't let your hand go," he smiled and squeezed your hand a bit. No noise came out of your mouth but Rafael could read "thank you" on them.

"Julia, will you have Dominick to be your husband?"

"Yes, I will."

"Dominick, will you have Julia to be your wife?"

*

"Y/N, this is Dominick, you will study with him four hours a week until your grades are good enough," her father said and left the living room right after. Tough father.

"You can call me Sonny," he smiled to you. "I won't be a terrible teacher, I promise."

"Your name's Dominick, why would I call you Sonny?"

"Call me whatever you want,"

"What's your full name?"

"Dominick Carisi Jr, why ?"

"I'll call you Junior." a sassy teenage girl, this should be fun, he sarcastically thought. And it was.

*

"I want you to be my first Junior," you said as the two of you were making out in your bedroom. You were 17 and he was 23. It wasn't right, so he stopped.

"You should be with someone your age, doll."

"Why? Because people say that's how it should be? I haven't been able to think or look at another guy since my dad introduce you to me." she paused. "do you love me, Dominick Carisi Jr?"

"You know I do."

"Say it. Show it." And he did prove it.

*

"Who's Anna?" she asked.

"What?"

"You got a text from Anna. Who is she?"

"A friend. And don't look on my phone!"

"It was there, I just saw it. Are you dating her?"

"We met a few times, that's it."

"Don't lie to me, Dominick. You know I hate it!"

"She was there and you were not. So yeah, we went out together." it was the first time her heart broke.

And then he thought about this morning when he found you and Rafael waking up naked. When he turned his eyes, they directly found you. Your arm was crossed with Rafael's, you were close to him. So close, it hurts.

"Dominick, will you have Julia to be your wife?" The priest asked again.

[thisspiderwrites]

un-fucking-believable (t.h.)

description: you’d think that two people that dream of working in the entertainment industry would have something in common other than their passion. word count: 3.6 k pairing: tom holland x reader based off: la la land                                                                                            a/n: i tried making it fun to read and this is the first fic i’m actually publishing so sorry if it’s not that good, i’m not sure if this has been done before so i apologize if the idea is not that original, anyway i hope you like it (also forgive me if there are some mistakes, english is not my first language) and special thanks to @tomhollandxreader for helping me out                                                warnings: language, angst (i think), mentions of sex (very light ones)

Winter

The sun was at its finest hour and causing people to simmer inside their cars while they waited for traffic to finally flow smoothly. The sound of completely different songs blasted from each vehicle. The drivers managed to find ways to kill time while waiting, some singing along the lyrics of the songs that make it to the top forty, and others crossing off and adding tasks to their to-do lists.

“It’s another day of sun in the city of Los Angeles… A mí me gustan mayores… Let’s just turn down the lights and close the door… They try to make me go to rehab but I said… Si tu novio te deja sola…”

“How come radio stations in L.A. don’t play anything good when you actually need them to?” a very pale freckled boy said to his older brother from the passenger seat.

“It’s not that they’re bad songs, they just don’t fit your mood.” the curly haired driver responded, “anyway forget the music and help me with my lines.”

After many failed auditions, Tom was slowly losing his faith but he couldn’t let his brothers see that. After his big break acting alongside Naomi Watts and Ewan McGregor he was hoping to get more than just two roles, but none of his auditions were going the way he wanted them to go. Most times he got the roll, but then the project was shut down, and other times, he simply wasn’t fit for the part. He kept the auditions going just like he kept working as a barista, like everyone else in Los Angeles.

“Tom, where’s your aux chord?” he started looking in the compartment in front of him, once he found it he connected his phone and started browsing through his music library.

“I think about that day I left him at a Greyhound station West of Santa Fé…”

“Okay, let’s see…” the freckled boy tried looking for the last line they practiced.

“Page six Sam” Tom started moving his thumbs to the beat of the song.

“Alright… Mister French please wrap it up.”

“Objection! Your honor, Mr. Pierce’s argument has no base at all. According to California state law, the court does not attend to matters of the heart… Crap, I messed up.” Sam looked at his brother reading the lines once again.

They both got startled when they heard a loud honk behind them. They both looked offended to the car next to them. A girl with an annoyed look stopped right next to them on a nice Buick Riviera Convertible and honked one more time. Tom flipped her off and she drove away shaking her head.

“Jeez, people here could learn some manners” Tom gave Sam his script and started driving.

Tom finally dropped Sam off at the restaurant where he performed at to help pay rent, and went to his audition. This was the third audition of the week, and he was exhausted, he wanted to do more than just knock on everyone’s door begging for a chance, he had his own plan: an amazing indie film that, right now, he thought was never going to see the light of day. He went in the building and he sat there waiting for a while. Everyone around him with the same clothes and haircut as him. He started bouncing his leg nervously without noticing until he was finally called in. He thought the audition was going rather well, but as he was in the middle of crying for the scene, someone came into the room and the casting director told him he could leave. He just nodded and then sniffled before exiting the room.

Tom threw himself on his bed and laid there for a while with his eyes closed. He let out a sigh after rubbing his face with his hands. He took a towel and decide to hide in his shower for a while. He was deep in his eighties rock playlist to sing in the shower when he heard loud banging on his bathroom door. He rolled his eyes and dried his hand to stop the music.

“What?” he shouted while wiping a drop of shampoo that threatened to get in his eye.

“Hurry up Tom, I need to take a shit before we leave!” he heard his other brother, Harry, say through the door.

“Leave? Where are you going?” he asked stopping the water from running to hear Harry better.

“Just get out of the shower already! I got us a way into a party from a movie that just wrapped” he heard his brother and let the water run again so he could take the rest of the shampoo off.

As soon as Harry heard his brother stopped singing he swung the door open. He was hit by a heat wave.

“Holy shit, you want to open a window?” he walked right past Tom and started fixing his hair.

“How did the audition go?” This time it was his best friend Harrison at the doorframe.

Tom gave him a look and shrugged, towel wrapped around his waist. The blue eyed boy patted his shoulder and told him to get ready. Tom walked out of the bathroom in direction to his room trying to avoid eye contact.

“I’m not really having a great day, maybe I’ll just call Megan and we’ll stay in” he used his girlfriend as an excuse even though they had barely seen each other in weeks and Tom didn’t know where their relationship was at anymore.

“Look man, I’m sorry about the audition but you need to clear your head” Harrison said following him. “You’re a great actor and I’m sure you’ll get a call back soon, besides a lot of important people will be at the party tonight. So put on some pants and let’s go out” after this Tom shut the door in his face. “I thought this was the part where we shared a bro hug.”

Right after putting his sweatpants on, Tom heard banging on his door again.

“What?” he found Harrison and Harry ready to go right outside. “I don’t want to go to a party filled with social climbers and Hollywood clichés.”

“You’ve got the invitation, you’ve got the right address…”

“I’m guessing Sam’s here.”

He looked in the music’s direction and he found his brother singing with his earphones still on. The freckled boy examined his roommates and took one earphone out.

“I’ll get ready in a bit, I got a little caught up at the restaurant” he excused himself walking towards his room. “Also, the lady next door asked if one of us could look after her cats” his voice muffled because of the door.

“You choose mate” Harrison said. “The party or cat sitting?”

“Fine I’ll put on some pants” he said like a defeated teenager.

“So I was thinking that this could be the greatest idea since the Lord of the Rings…”

This girl had been talking to Tom about her newest production for about an hour. After a few glasses of whatever it was that they were serving at the party Tom was buzzed enough to not care.

“Yeah, that’s because it sounds an awful lot like the Lord of the Rings… Melanie.” He was tired of his friends bailing on him at these parties when they finally found someone to take home.

“It’s Melissa, and no it’s not. Look, first of all it’s not a ring, it’s a necklace and second of all it’s not hobbits and a shire, it is trolls and a bridge. It’s brilliant!” Melissa would have gotten on Tom’s nerves if he hadn’t been distracted by his own girlfriend.

“Megan?” he thought she wasn’t in town.

“No, it’s Melissa. Do I need to spell it?” Tom excused himself and walked in Megan’s direction.

After two years of being in a steady relationship, Tom and Megan were losing their groove. They started growing apart but felt the need to stay with each other because they feared to lose one of the only things that felt familiar anymore, at least Tom did. They started skipping out on dates, missing each other’s phone calls, forgetting to answer each other’s texts, things that happened in any dying friendship. Except this wasn’t a friendship, this was an actual relationship. Even sex started becoming a dull thing for both of them. So when he saw her leaving with an older guy who looked like a movie producer he wasn’t really surprised.

“Hey! Megan!” he tried going up to her before she was all the way out the door.

“Tom? What are you doing here?” she turned around looking surprised and a little worried.

“Harry got us in” they both stood there for a while.

Tom didn’t really know what he was expecting, maybe an apology, an explanation or at least something to let him down easy. She looked at Tom and opened her mouth a few times trying to decide what to say but no words came out of her mouth until the guy she was leaving with decided to check what was taking her so long.

“Megan, sweetie, I thought you were ready” he put his hand in the small of her back and Tom didn’t know what to think.

“I am, I was just…” she stared at Tom for a while and still didn’t know what to say.

“Who’s this young man?” he held her closer to him this time and Megan looked uncomfortable.

“Nobody” Tom said. “I was just leaving and I thought I knew her but, I guess I don’t” he still looked at Megan hoping she would say something.

“Let’s go then babe” the guy looked at Megan expectantly.

“I’ll meet you in the car Dean, I just realized I got the wrong purse” he kissed her head murmured something that made her smile.

Her smile faded away when she saw Tom’s blank expression. No more anger or confusion, because he wasn’t sure how to feel. Was she dating that ‘Dean’ guy now? Were Megan and him over? Where had she been the past few weeks? Why hadn’t she called? She kept talking but Tom couldn’t hear anything

“…I know this is confusing but I really need this Tom, please don’t screw this up for me. I’ll catch up with you later” she looked at him with the puppy eyes that always got Tom to do everything she wanted.

“I don’t see how I could screw this up. Look, do whatever you want to do. I don’t want to hear anything from you right now.” she nodded and left.

He stood there alone, people passing him by. A few minutes later he decided to get his Prius and go back home.

Un-fucking-believable. That’s exactly what went through Tom’s mind when he saw his car had been towed. He was not in the mood for walking. He wasn’t really in the mood for anything. He wanted to forget about everything for a while. How his audition has gone terrible, how he hated his job as a barista, how his girlfriend basically broke up with him without even knowing, how he had to walk all the way home and go get his car tomorrow morning. This was definitely not his day.

He found himself walking by the restaurant Sam worked at. He was able to hear the classic Christmas tunes, but he stopped to actually listen when the melody changed. It was calm and it sounded familiar. He felt his heavy chest lighten up and he forgot about his shitty day. All he could think was how much he wanted to know who was playing and what was it that spoke to him. He turned around and made his way into the restaurant. He contemplated the pianist on duty and how her fingers moved swiftly to the melody. The strand of hair moving towards her face sparked a memory in Tom’s head.

“I flipped her off this morning.”

“Why is it that they give a driver’s license to any idiot now days?” y/n thought to herself while moving past the Prius that refused to move in front of her.

The guy driving gave her an offended look and flipped her off when she honked again. She didn’t care, she just wanted to get to the comfort of her house after almost melting under the sun. She even hallucinated people getting out of their cars and stopping traffic to do a dance routine. She got out of her lovely car and took the cassette she was listening to out of her stereo. She had the habit of bringing only one cassette every ride so she could listen to the songs she was learning better. She took her prescription sunglasses off and unlocked the door of her apartment to find her brother, Tyler, laying across her leather couch with his shoes on. She jumped to the sight of two feet dangling from one of the armrests.

“Please stop sneaking into my home” she said trying to catch her breath.

“Well hello to you too, sis” he said getting up a little disoriented. “Do you think mom would call this a home?”

“Well this is what the apartment looked like before we picked you up from your foster home…” she stopped abruptly to notice he had taken off the sheet that was guarding the couch from dust and the sneakers he was wearing we covered in dirt. “What are you doing? Please don’t sit there or at least take your shoes off” she pushed him off her couch.

“Are you serious right now?” he got up from the floor.

“There are other couches that don’t have sheets on them, you can sit on those” she grabbed the sheet that was now a ball of cloth on the floor.

Her brother had a hard time walking around due to all of the boxes full of records, cassettes and pictures of musicians.

“When are you going to unpack all of these? It looks like you just moved in, no wonder you’re single, people can barely walk here” Tyler made his way to the fridge and started looking for something to eat.

“I swear when mom adopted the little kid from ‘Maid in Manhattan’ I didn’t think it was for him to come into my house, get dirt on my carpet and steal my food” she closed the fridge on his face “and I will unpack these when I unpack them in my own club!”

“Ugh! y/n it’s like a girl broke up you and you’re stalking her” Tyler started looking through all the pictures.

“Talking from your own experience?” she slapped his hand “Don’t touch that!” he rolled his eyes.

“Look, I have someone I want you to meet” he grabbed a framed picture of their mom and changed its place.

“I don’t want to date another one of your Hollywood fuckboys, I’m done with all of them” she rolled her eyes.

“Even Dylan?” he raised an eyebrow holding up a paper with a phone number.

“Especially Dylan” she said taking the paper with the new boy’s number on it.

She curled it up in a ball and threw it in the trash. The paper fell outside and Tyler picked it up.

“You missed” he stood in front of her trying to stop her from avoiding him. “Look, mom and I are worried about you and she hopes you’re not in some kind of cult of something” y/n looked offended.

“Why would she think that?” she escaped her brother and put their mother’s picture back in its place.

“Oh, I don’t know” he said sarcastically “maybe because you’re living like a hermit and driving without insurance” she rolled her eyes. “You need to get your shit together.”

“I know a guy with a face tattoo, he has his shit together and a heart of gold! He’s perfect for you” she said with a faked enthusiasm.

“Get your shit together” he said with a stern look.

“Get my shit together? Tyler I had my shit together, it’s not my fault I got scammed!” now y/n was moving her hands hysterically.

“Oh my god y/n, everyone knew that lady was shady and warned you. You were too busy shagging her to notice” she opened her mouth but he cut her off. “Look, Sam is a nice guy, he likes music and he’s a pianist just like you. He even works at that restaurant you used to work at. Call him” he put the paper ball on her hand.

“I don’t want to date myself!” now Tyler was the one running away. “Look, you’re acting like life’s got me on the ropes. The truth is that I’m letting life hit me until it gets tired. After that I’m going to punch back” He kissed the top of her head and then mouthed a call him before leaving. “I’m changing the locks!”

“You can’t afford it!” he shouted from the end of the hall.

“I’m a phoenix, raising from the ashes!” she shouted back. “Wow, mom was right, I could’ve been an actress” she thought before closing the door and throwing the number towards a random place in her living room.

She sat on her stool in front of her piano and started practicing the song she was listening to in the car.

The night arrived and even though she hated playing at the restaurant, she had to. She was lucky they gave her a second chance at all, taking into account the fact that last time she was there she fought with a client because he requested for her to play softer.

“Hey buddy, don’t know if you noticed but this isn’t a keyboard. Also if you don’t like what I’m playing the door is right there.”

Yeah, those were her exact words. She got ready and put on her best suit. Somehow the tie made her feel more confident than the heels she was requested to wear but never actually did. She made her way into the restaurant with all the Christmas sheet music in a black portfolio and greeted her boss with the fakest smile she could ever produce.

“Hello sir, thank you for having me back” she shook his hand and he mirrored her fake smile.

“Just play the set list” he said letting go of the handshake.

“Right, even though I don’t think anyone cares what I play but sure thing” she said walking towards the piano.

“If you mean anyone other than me then you’re correct. I care and I don’t want to hear any jazz, that’s what the club in the next block is for” he raised an eyebrow as for asking if everything was clear.

“Understood” she said waiting for him to leave to start playing.

Like on cue, he gave y/n one last glance before leaving. She felt a weight fall of her shoulders and started arranging her sheets. She got a few bills from her wallet for the tip jar and got around to examine in what key she was going to play the set list. Right when she was about to start she heard a sarcastic welcome back from one of the waiters.

“Thank you, it’s always nice to see your face Dylan” she put her fingers on the keys and started playing jingle bells.

After playing the set list twice and having only one dollar from tips that wasn’t from her wallet y/n got tired of playing the classic ‘We Wish You a Merry Christmas’. She looked around, there were only a few hipsters at the bar and only a few couples sitting on the table area. The hipsters were too busy choosing their beer and the couples were all over each other. No one was going to notice, right? She started the set list once again but this time she shifted the melody to something she knew very well. Her fingers started moving passionately to Mia & Sebastian’s Theme. Once she finished she got up her stool, disheveled. She looked around and noticed people staring at her. Not a single person clapping. She turned around to see her boss leaning against the door frame. He just moved his index finger indicating her to approach to him.

“I think I hear what you’re saying but that’s not really what you mean” y/n argued desperate.

“I think I just said that you’re fired, so yeah, that’s pretty much it” her boss said.

“Yeah, I hear you but I don’t think that what you mean, I think you mean…” she gestured for her boss to finish her sentence.

“I mean you are fired” he stood his ground.

“You mean ‘play the set list, this is a warning’, Right?” she continued to try.

“What planet are you from? I said you’re fired” y/n’s face dropped.

“But it’s Christmas…” she tried one last time.

“Yeah, I see the decorations. Good luck in the new year.”

Her blood was boiling now. No one cared what she played. Not a single person gave her a glance except for that weird guy with the lazy eye that tipped her a dollar. She couldn’t believe she had just blown her chance because she played one different song. A beautiful song that she poured her heart into. She looked at the doorway and saw a guy staring at her. She took her money plus the one buck from the jar and her black portfolio with her sheet music. On her way out she saw the guy from the doorway approaching her but she was so mad she couldn’t hear anything.

“I just heard you play and I wanted to…” y/n bumped into Tom but just kept walking.

He stood there stunned. He scoffed and once again thought to himself.

Un-fucking-believable

tags: @zendmylife @spidey-mantom @sam-a-holland @spider-bih @sidespidey @dusktillholland @hollandazing @tomhollandxreader @lovelyimagines @loverholland