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aileen-hollingsworth · 8 years ago

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F I R E W O R K O U T ~#13

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A/N: THE TIME FOR MY TARDY LEAVING FIC HAS COME. I had tests, ok? But I am free now. So… super late, but this takes place on a random day after the first rebel attack and (most of it) on the day Aileen gets eliminated. That means before the Queen’s funeral. Thanks @mila-regan and @lady-naomi-lafleur for the RP’s! And FYI it begins and finishes with Colleen guys ;) I think it’s not that bad lol Ft. Cole, Naomi, Mila, (suuuuuper brief mention of Haiden) and Aileen’s maids. Enjoy!

“This is not how picnics work.” Cole pointed out as he chewed on his sandwich.

I smiled at his muffled voice, “Best one I’ve had so far.” He replied with an eye roll and scoffed. “You don’t believe me?”

“We’re in the hospital wing.” He stated, raising an eyebrow at me and then gesturing at the room to emphasize. “Picnics are supposed to be outside, sitting on the grass under the sun, surrounded by flowers or a good breeze…” He paused when he noticed the look I was giving him and with a teasing smile added, “Or you know something corny like that.”

“Thanks for ruining it, Cole.”

“That’s what I’m here for.” He smiled, giving me a kiss on the nose.

“Whatever. Grass is overrated anyway.” I mumbled, snatching one of his grapes and placing it in my mouth. “Plus, the sun hates me.”

“The sun hates you.” He repeated with a smirk.

“Yes, it does. It gives me sunburns.”

“Hate to break it to you, but that happens to a lot of people, Firework.”

“When you get sunburn because you forget to put on sunblock to stand in line for an ice cream we can talk about this.”

“Very well, the sun hates you.” He reached for a grape too. “You never seemed bothered by it when we walked in the gardens though.”

“We were usually in the shade, and besides, I use sunblock every time to avoid becoming a lobster.”

He grinned at that. “I bet you’re a good looking lobster.”

“No. I’m the grumpy lobster that tells people to stay at least one foot away from her skin at all times until she’s not a lobster anymore. That means no nose kisses or hugs.”

He made a face at my last statement. “Okay, so not a favorable lobster, but still a very good looking one.”

“You know I say lobster because I look red.”

“Hey, be purple if you want. Just don’t lose that hair of yours or I’ll have to come up with new nicknames.”

“And that would be a tragedy.” I snickered.

“Well, I’m not that creative.”

I reached for a grape again and he glared at me for taking yet another one. “You know, there’s no point in you bringing me lunch if you’re going to eat it for me.”

“I’m a food stealer, get used to it.”

“Okay,” he grabbed one of my tangerine slices before I could stop him “I do it too. Don’t have to hold back now.”

Giving him a narrowed-eye look I crossed my arms over my chest. “Shameful, Cole. You’re stealing from an innocent girl.”

He ate the slice without remorse. “Clearly I am a bad example to all the little children out there.”

“A disgrace really. Your cow should be dishonored.”

He lost the straight face at that, “My cow?”

I mentally thanked Naomi for my win. “It’s a Selected thing, you won’t get it.”

“And here I thought you were the only weird one.”

“I guess I’m not that special.”

“I beg to differ.”

“Please, do elaborate.”

“I call you matchstick because of your hair, but Firework can have more than one meaning.” He seemed amused by my confusion.

Moving aside our food he carefully scooted closer to me and reached for my hands, “Close your eyes.” I frowned at that, so he squeezed. “Come on, close them.”

“Fine,” I grumbled, doing what he asked. “But if this is some kind of move to steal a kiss from me I’ll slap you.”

He laughed and I smiled at the way the sound seemed to echo in the room. Even with my eyes closed I could imagine his lips revealing a grin. “Feisty.”

“And that’s why you like me.”

“Questionable.”

I opened my eyes and gasped dramatically to feign offense. He leaned closer to me and placed his forehead on mine. “I’m kidding. Close your eyes.”

I closed them again after another glare and the touch of his forehead disappeared. Slightly disappointing.

“Perfect. Now, imagine you’re walking on the gardens at night by yourself,” he began. “So, you’re minding your own business, right? But then you catch the glimpse of something lighting up the sky behind you, the sound of crackling filling the silence. What do you do?”

“I turn around, of course.”

“Mhmm, exactly, you turn around and find yourself with flashes of light in different colors that appear in the air with every pop heard in the distance.”

“Fireworks.” I chuckled.

“Precisely.” A kiss to my knuckles. “Captivating, aren’t they? You were in the gardens for a regular walk, but then they just appeared out of nowhere and the thought of looking away became impossible. You’ll pause for as long as it’s necessary. Maybe you’ll even derail from your path to find a better spot to admire them, someplace closer. They light up the sky in a different way and you just have to see it. Once they’re gone you’ll wish there were more.” I nodded again, and this time felt his hand move to intertwine our fingers, his palm facing mine. “That’s you every time you cross a door.”

Even though my eyes snapped open at those words he continued with a smile, staring at me like he believed I was the only thing worth looking at in the moment. “You do whatever it takes to make everything an odd adventure and you drag people with you to join the fun. A walk through the gardens becomes a charade game, searching for a cat becomes a pillow fight, washing the dishes turns into a musical, taking pictures ends up with a splash on the fountains. When you laugh it fills up the space and makes everyone else wish to share the moment with you. When you joke it’s so others can become part of your flare.”

I knew my mouth was agape, but I couldn’t help it. I’d never thought words could strike me so much. It wasn’t only the idea he was trying to convey, it was the sentiment behind it, the true belief that I was all that. How he could actually compare me to something so simple and make it have a deeper meaning. It was the way the words flowed out of his mouth with the very intention of leaving me in awe.

“You’re a firework,” he leaned to kiss my forehead with a grin. “Now that I think about it, being a matchstick means you light yourself up as well.”

“You might be a lot better with nicknames than you think.”

“Maybe I am.”

“Is it too soon to be using the L word for real?” I whispered, placing my arms over his shoulders.

He closed his eyes—bringing his forehead to rest on mine again—the grin on his face growing wider. “Maybe it is…but I love you too.”

I tuned my ukulele as Cole ate. He was stuck with hospital food that day since I’d decided to start packing before eliminations and had no time to make him lunch myself.

“Does it taste like cardboard?” I joked.

“Actually, it’s pretty good.”

“Better than mine?”

“Nothing is better than yours.”

I raised an eyebrow. “Not even Chef Baguette’s?”

“He doesn’t make cat shaped sandwiches… so I’m gonna say no.”

“Good answer” I smirked.

He replied with only a wink and continued eating, yet his eyes drifted back to me when I started playing. I tried to ignore his gaze and instead focused on my hand movements. The sound. The beat. Letting my fingers touch the required strings, instead of struggling to remember the chords. When you practiced a song long enough there was a point where the notes became an afterthought and it was just your hand memory playing, automatically moving to the next thing. Almost like your head created a pattern.

When I was done Cole blinked a couple of times before whistling. “That was…well…where you even touching the strings?”

I could only smile. There was always the feeling of fulfillment when I made it all the way through a song with no mistakes. “Pretty neat, huh?”

“Neat will never do you justice, Firework.”

“Flattery will only get you so far, Cabbages.”

He chuckled and returned to his food once more. “So today is your last day?”

I nodded, walking over to him so I could steal some bread. “My time in the Selection has come to an end.”

He reached for my stealing hand and snatched the piece of bread back, “Your time in the Selection, yes, but not your time in the palace.”

“Well, if I have a reason to visit…”

He pulled my arm and I fell on the bed next to him. “Do you have a reason?”

Our noses grazed one another. “I think I have plenty.”

“Elizabeth Matthews.” She didn’t seem too bothered. “Patricia Beauchamp.” Slightly disappointed, but Mila was quick to comfort her. “Alexandra Amaria.” Well…she’s not even in the country.

Haiden paused just for a second to glance at me before reading the last name. I faked a pout and he looked down at the paper again with a suppressed smile. “Aileen Hollingsworth.”

And so, I am out.

“Aileen!” Naomi practically screamed, stressing the last syllable in my name. I turned around to look at her and yelled “Naomi!” back at her.

She lunged at me for a hug. “I’m gonna miss youuuu!”

I returned her hug. “I’ll miss you too, but I won’t be far away!”

We were screaming so much Haiden turned to look at us with raised eyebrows as he made his way out of the room as well. I stuck my tongue out at him and he rolled his eyes in slight amusement as he walked past us.

Naomi—who hadn’t been able to see our little exchange—held me at arm’s length and tilted her head. “Where will you go?”

I laughed. “It’ll be a couple of weeks before my parents come back from filming in Dominica, but they told me I might as well stay here since they’ll be back soon. I’ll stay in my uncle’s house with my cousins…and my brother.”

She gave me a sympathetic smile. Naomi had been one of the few people I’d told about Sam. Burning therapy had been nice. “I hope that goes well! You better write to me!”

“We talked…I think it’ll be fine. And don’t worry, I’ll write! Maybe I’ll even sneak in and say hi.” I wiggled my eyebrows at the last part, technically not sneaking in if I’m invited.

“That would be great!” she practically jumped with excitement, but then in a whisper she added, “I’ll secretly send you Baguette’s food.”

I squeezed her hand thinking about how I would miss seeing her every day, doing something equally dramatic as me. “That would be wonderful.”

I was making sure I had all my things ready to leave when my room’s door swung open. “Aileen!” This time it was Mila who was running to me for a hug. “I can’t believe it!”

She came at me with such force I almost fell, but I managed to keep my ground and hugged her back with a laugh. “Well, I can. I’ll miss seeing you every day however.”

“I’m going to miss you so much Aileen. But how did you know? Did Haiden tell you he would send you away?”

“Um…” I smiled awkwardly. “I didn’t mention it to you guys before, but winning hasn’t been on my plans for a while now.”

She laughed. “Wait, what?”

“Haiden and I agreed being friends was as far as things would go for us… but don’t worry, it wasn’t tragic at all or anything. We’re actually pretty close…just not romantically speaking.” I had decided not to tell others about it to avoid problems, but if I was finally out I could trust Mila with it. “We realized it pretty early on actually.”

“I’m happy you two could go through with just being friends. But why did he make you leave now and not when the “One” is chosen?

She had no idea how much I wished I could stay. “This is just the moment where leaving me in if I’m not really participating isn’t possible anymore. I knew I’d be out this round since before his birthday.”

Mila accepted it with a sigh. “Couldn’t you’ve warned me? I don’t want you to leave Aileen. I like the other girls but my best friends will be gone now…”

Her words caught me off guard and I couldn’t help but tear up with a smile. “That’s not fair! You don’t get to make me cry!”

Tears formed in her eyes too as she gave me a sheepish smile back. “I can if we cry together.”

I looked up at the ceiling to stop the tears from coming down and laughed. “I won’t even be that far! I’ll probably still see you once a week!”

“I know, but it will be so different without you. The palace is already this big; it will be almost empty without you.”

“I guess I would have felt the same if you or Naomi had left before me…” I paused, remembering my conversations with Cole. “Oh, but trust me. I think I’ll be around more than you think. I’ll just have to find you.”

She shared a mischievous grin with me. “What are you up to? Just sneaking your way back into the palace?”

“Well…” I trailed off, plopping on the bed. I’d let Naomi think I was just going to sneak in, but I couldn’t keep it in any longer. I’d have to talk with her about it soon too. “Some sneaking around will be involved, but I’ll probably be here with an invitation…A royal invitation.”

She gasped and plopped down next to me. “Stop the mystery and tell me already!”

“Remember Cole?”

“Yes… Wait he didn’t..?” She frowned at me and I remembered the only interaction she had with him was the crashing bowl incident.

“Ok, there are a lot of things I haven’t been telling you now that I think about it. I’m a horrible friend. Naomi should dishonor my cow.”

Mila laughed at the reference. “Oh, she should! But I forgive you for not telling me if you tell me now.”

Here goes nothing. I quickly stood up from the bed, rambling as I paced the room, unable to hide a smile. “Okay, so you’ve probably noticed I go to the gardens a lot or I’m just generally not in the women’s room. Or maybe you haven’t noticed? I don’t know…but anyway, sometimes it was because I was with Haiden—talking about how he was going to deal with you girls without dying and becoming a puddle of confusion—but other times it was because I was hanging out with Cole.”

I took a big breath before continuing. “I mean, it wasn’t anything planned. He almost killed me with his horse, and then we started walking back to the palace, but we ended up talking, and he sucks at charades—but I suck at them too so who cares. After that we just kind of kept on meeting each other there. It turned out he wasn’t a complete jerk, he actually tried to help me when I was upset about my brother, and at some point we just kind of started getting along. I don’t know why I didn’t realize how I felt about him before. After all, we did spend a lot of time together, and I liked our random and not-so-random meet ups…yet for some reason it didn’t cross my mind!” I rolled my eyes at my own naivety. “No wonder Haiden kept asking if there was something I wanted to tell him! He probably realized I liked Cole before I did!”

“I am completely stunned, Aileen!” The surprise was written all over her face. “Of course I noticed you weren’t allowed in the women’s room a lot, but I thought you just needed some alone time…. Well, you did but with Cole! I’m glad he isn’t that much of a jerk, but he almost killed you with his horse?”

“Oh, I’m just being dramatic, don’t worry. I kicked him in the shins when he came with his lousy apology anyway.”

She shook her head with a laugh. “I already like you two together. And it’s so funny Haiden is totally fine with it.”

“Uh, I don’t know if he’s fine with it. I mean, I know he’ll be happy for us, but I’m still working on getting him to admit he cares for Cole in general… You see, they don’t get along so well, but the two idiots care for each other, so at least there’s that.”

“Yeah, I figured out they didn’t get along that well.” She paused before smirking. “Sooo, when’s the wedding?”

I scowled at her. “Don’t jump to the wedding just yet!”

“Sorry but that means I get to see you more!”

I tsked. “We’ve barely just kissed…and we admitted our feelings for each other, but I doubt he’s thinking about that just yet.”

“YOU KISSED?”

“Oh my…” I brought a hand to my forehead. “I forgot to tell Haiden we kissed! DON’T TELL HIM I TOLD YOU FIRST.” I wasn’t even sure of how he would react to the news. “But yes! WE KISSED.”

“No, I won’t! I’m so happy for you, Aileen!”

“I wish it hadn’t taken us a near death experience to actually realize this…but I’m happy about him, about us.” Us. I couldn’t help but squeal at the thought before jumping on the bed and covering myself with a blanket. “You make me overly happy about things, you know? I become a danger to humanity.” I thought of Cole again and buried my head in the bed. “But he’s just really adorable, you have no idea.”

She practically squealed with me. “You two are so adorable! This makes me so happy, you deserve a happy ending too!”

I smiled at her. “Thanks Mila, I still can’t believe it sometimes to be honest. I wish he wasn’t stuck on that dreadful medical wing however.”

“He’s where? Is he okay?”

“Oh…I guess you haven’t heard.” Not really a surprise since Cole had insisted word shouldn’t get out. Apparently he didn’t want the country focusing on his medical monitoring.

Mila gave me a questioning look after mumbling a “No.”

I rubbed my neck and averted her gaze. “We…encountered a rebel during the attack from last week.”

“What? You did!?”

“Yeah…”

“They didn’t hurt you, right?”

“He got shot, but he’s okay now… They’re keeping him there for a while longer just to be safe. I kind of got a concussion,” I did my best to dismiss her concern “it was nothing though.”

“I wouldn’t call a concussion ‘nothing’, Aileen! You two could’ve died!”

“I barely remember what happened after we met the rebel…I didn’t even see when Cole got shot—which I’m not sure if I’m thankful for or not—I just woke up and we were in a completely different room, and Haiden was there and Cole was…” I shook my head to push the image of Cole’s bloody side and clammy skin away. “The important thing is we were all okay in the end.”

“I am so grateful you’re alive. And you’re right; in the end we’re all okay and safe.” She gave me a hesitant smile. “Try to be more careful next time.” Then with a wink she pulled me in for a last hug. “I have saved you some bags of chips, so you can still think of me.”

“Thanks Mila, but I doubt they’ll survive long.” I laughed, but tears threatened my eyes again as I felt the familiar smell of pine around her. “Ugh, this feels like we’re not going to see each other again even though we will.”

“I know, but we will! Imagine us both ending up in the palace…”

“I guess we never know…” Could it be her? Was she the girl Haiden had been talking about? I’ll have to wait and see.

“Have a safe trip home, Aileen.”

Anne and Janet hugged me tightly and I almost felt the need to cry again. I managed to keep it together though, and shook my head as they left the room to convince Chef Baguette to make me one last quick meal. I doubted he would agree to it if he still remembered me and Haiden stealing his baguettes months ago.

When we were alone Sydney seized the opportunity to say her farewells. She still reminded me of my mother a lot. “You better behave yourself, Lady Aileen.”

I frowned at the use of my temporary title. Since the day they assigned her as my third maid she’d never once called me Lady before. “Sydney, now it’s just Miss.”

“I don’t think it’ll stay that way for long.” Her smile broadened at my puzzled look. “Just because Prince Haiden wasn’t interested in you romantically, it doesn’t mean another prince isn’t.”

The blush that took over my face was probably enough evidence to confirm her claims, but I still stammered to refute them. I might have told Mila the truth—and planned to tell Naomi soon enough—but I hadn’t planned on letting the whole palace in on the story just yet. “W-What? Sydney, I don’t know where you’re getting the idea that— Why would you even think he— I’m not—”

She stopped my blabbering by placing her hands on my shoulders. “Aileen, I’ve spent over a year watching my boy deny his own feelings for a girl. Luckily for him, despite the lack of courtship, the girl seems to share the sentiment and is only keeping it at bay like he is. Maybe a lot of people didn’t notice it on you two either, but I saw the way you looked at each other once and it’s that same look. Considering the amount of time you’ve spent on the hospital wing lately however… I like to think you two have gone past denial.”

I blinked a couple of times, taking in her words and then giving her a shy smile. “Yes, we have.”

She nodded with approval. “Good, I wish my Nathan had been that fast to accept it.”

Sydney had mentioned her son a couple of times before, a guard like his father, so I’d actually met him too, but she’d never mentioned he had a liking for someone in particular. I suddenly wondered who it was. “Do you think he’ll ever accept it?”

“Oh, he better, though I understand his reluctance.” She shook her head with a sigh. “Either way, I hope things go well for you and Prince Cole.”

I finally hugged her. “I hope so too.”

“I wish I could go with you.” Cole grumbled, staring at the ceiling.

“That would have been slightly suspicious anyway.” I snorted.

“Ugh, fine, but I’ll be allowed to walk again soon. They said I should be able to do so before…Aunt Alize’s funeral.” Every time the Queen was mentioned it was like the air in the room shifted out of place—even for just a split second.

Haiden might smile at certain things now, but it wasn’t the same as it used to be. As for Cole, whenever it was brought up by accident, he always made a moment of silence (that I wasn’t sure if he noticed he did or not). I for one felt the constant reminder that a brave woman’s life had come to an end for no logical reason, and not only her, but other dignitaries as well. Ambassador E-Jun that had been so sweet with everyone…

Cole cleared his throat as we both tried to get past that split second together. “Maybe once I’m discharged we can have a decent picnic. At night. That way we’ll avoid your transformation into a lobster.”

That managed to get a laugh out of me. “In the moonlight it shall be.” I gave him a quick kiss before trying to head for the door, but he didn’t let go of my hand and instead pulled me to the hospital bed again. “What?” I asked with a grin as he examined my face, only bare inches apart from his.

“Just wanted to get a good look at you before you leave.”

“I’ll come visit soon enough, don’t be so melodramatic.”

He smirked and gently reached for my face to give me one last kiss. “Trust me, I’ll be counting the minutes.”

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#cole #mila #naomi #haiden #sydney #fic #not a challenge #colleen blooming

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haleyfury · 5 years ago

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August was another one of those strange months where it felt long and short at the same time! This month, I celebrated my twenty-second birthday, had more beach & pool days, finished my first semester of grad school, and read a ton of books! I had two weeks in August in between the summer and fall semesters, so I spent so, so much time reading! I think it also helped that I didn’t have a ton of new shows coming out (aside from the 3 seasons that I did binge and my weekly reality TV schedule, oops), but I was also just genuinely in the mood to read! I knew in the back of my mind that I likely won’t be able to devour 17 books a month for the rest of 2020 or until at least December, since I just started my fall semester last Monday and have a pretty big course load.

I have reviews already published and coming for 15 of 16 out of the follow books so I’m not going to be sharing my mini thoughts on them, with the exception of the books I DNF’ed.

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Anna K by Jenny Lee | 5/5 Stars

Loveboat, Taipei by Abigail Hing Wien | 2.5/5

The Heir Affair (The Royal We #2) by Heather Cocks & Jessica Morgan | 4.75/5

Such a Fun Age by Kiley Reid | 4/5

Recommended For You by Laura Silverman | 4/5 (ARC)

Regretting You by Colleen Hoover | 3.5/5

Rodham by Curtis Sittenfeld | 5/5

The Book of V. by Anna Solmon | 4/5

Grown by Tiffany D. Jackson | 4.5/5 (ARC)

The Best Worst Man by Mia Sosa | 5/5

Jesus Land: A Memoir by Julia Scheeres 5/5

An American Marriage by Tayari Jones | 3.5/5

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Fix Her Up by Tessa Bailey | 2.5/5

The Life and (Medieval) Times of Kit Sweetly | 4.5/5

Punching the Air by Ibi Zoiboi and Yusef Salaam | 4/5 (ARC)

One to Watch by Kate Stayman-London | 5/5

The Knockout Queen by Rufi Thorpe | 4/5

I went on a mini romance book kick this month (right now my mood keeps alternating between adult and YA contemporary), so I decided to finally pick up the first two books in Tessa Bailey’s Hot and Hammered series. I didn’t love Fix Her Up but I really liked one if its side characters, Rosie, who is the lead female protagonist in the second book, Love Her or Lose Her. While so many of my friends in the blogging and bookstagram worlds love this series, I didn’t realize how polarized readers felt about this series until I skimmed through Goodreads… and I’m definitely on the side that just doesn’t like the series. I was so uncomfortable with some of the romance series — not because I’m not used to the steamy content, but because I just hated the lead male protagonists and their dominance. I disliked the male protagonist in Love Her or Lose Her even more than I disliked Travis in Fix Her Up. Honestly, I don’t know why this series uses ‘her’ in the titles because it’s seriously the men who need some fixing. Love Her or Lose Her is a marriage redemption romance, as high school sweethearts Rosie and Dominic are on the brink of divorce. I once again hated his pet/nickname for Rosie (let’s just take any word of endearment and add ‘girl’ after it), and I honestly should’ve DnF’d this one right after the second chapter, as Dominic tries to get Rosie to have sex with him before she leaves their house. This series unfortunately is just not the one for me.

This month, I also DNF’ed Tessa Dare’s historical romance, The Duchess Deal. I definitely do see myself picking this one up again in the future, but I’m just not in a super big romance mood right now. I think I because I read so many romance in the first half of 2020, I’m starting to get more selective of the romance books I do pick up.

Selling Sunset S3 (Netflix) – It’s official: Selling Sunset is my favorite Netflix reality show. This LA real estate docusoap just gets better and better each season, and I know it’ll be a long wait for a fourth season, but it’ll be so worth it. I found Chrishell’s perspective about her divorce so intersting, but I do wish there would have been less drama and more of Christine’s wedding in the last episode.

Glow Up S2 (Netflix) – I binge-watched Glow Up S1 in a weekend during my winter break, so it was fun doing the same thing this summer with the second season. This make up competition series also makes me want to learn how to do makeup differently, but I think I’ll just leave it to the pros.

Million Dollar Beach House S1 (Netflix) – Million Dollar Beach House is definitely trying to be the East Coast/ Hamptons version of Selling Sunset. I don’t think it’s pulled it off just yet, but just like Selling Sunset, this first season really lays the foundation for what I think would be a second season. I wasn’t a huge fan of the drama, but I loved the houses.

Other Things I Watched: Below Deck Mediterranean S5, Say Yes to the Dress S19 (TLC), The West Wing S2 (Netflix/NBC), Last Chance U S5 (Netflix), Sugar Rush: Extra Sweet (Netflix)

Reviews

TWO GREAT READS, ONE MISS: Recent Contemporary Reads Mini Reviews

LIVE LOVE ROMANCE: Contemporary Romance Mini Reviews

FAVORITE ROYAL READS: The Royal We & The Heir Affair Review

NEW ADULT FAKE DATING: The Dare (Briar U #4) Review

Books I Loved & Not So Loved: YA Mini Reviews

BEST READING MONTH OF 2020: July 2020 Wrap Up

Other Bookish Fun

Fall 2020 Most Anticipated Adult Releases

Fall 2020 Most Anticipated YA Releases

Top Five Wednesday: Dream Adaptations

Happy 22nd Birthday to Me: 22 Favorite Books, TV Shows & More

Folklore Book Tag

August 2020 TBR ft. ARC August

What did you read & watch in August? Have you read any of the books I mentioned? Share in the comments!

17 BOOKS 1 FANGIRL: August 2020 Wrap Up August was another one of those strange months where it felt long and short at the same time!

#August 2020 #August 2020 Wrap Up #August Wrap Up

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aileen-hollingsworth · 8 years ago

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B R O K E N & S C A T T E R E D ~ #11

A/N: Finally got to this! So this takes place during the rebel attack from Cress, but when it comes to and end, kind of the aftermath I guess. Immediately after tho, that same day. Ft. Cole and Haiden. (As always thanks for the RP @haidenschreave ) Includes my brotps and Colleen realizing stuff. Third person narrative cause it fit better.

Cole walked through the hallways as best he could, the sound of his heart pumping in his ears while he struggled to keep Aileen up on his arms. Her unconscious body was limp against his chest and her dress was now stained with blood as well.

He needed to get to the hospital wing, but he wasn’t even close to getting there when he noticed someone standing inside a random room.

Even with no idea of why the guy was there, Cole staggered in, knowing he couldn’t keep it up, and convinced himself that anyone would be better help than empty halls.

The person turned around as soon as he heard the footsteps—rather on edge after everything that had happened that day—and Cole barely managed to recognize him with the lightheaded feeling he had. “Hai-Haiden?”

“Cole?” he stared at him with a frown before he saw who the slump body on his arms was. His distant posture was suddenly replaced with alarm when his eyes locked on the blood stains in her clothes. “W-What happened? Is she okay?” Haiden walked over to them, panic threatening to erupt in his chest at the thought of losing her too, but before he could reach them Cole’s knees buckled, refusing to hold him and Aileen both up any longer.

“Yeah, thankfully. She—” he took a deep breath “she’s unconscious, but she’s okay.” When he’d seen her body plummet to the ground initially he’d felt something inside him break, but her pulse was fine and it seemed the hit had only knocked her out.

He slowly placed her on the ground and Haiden kneeled in front of her, pressing a hand against her cheek with relief. “Thank God.” That’s when he noticed Cole’s troubled breathing echoing in the room and looked back up at him. “A-Are you okay?”

“Uh,” he struggled to focus as the whole room seemed to spin. Gunshot, Cole. He placed a hand to his wound. “Let’s just say the blood on her dress isn’t her own.” He mumbled, reaching for the nearby wall, hoping it would help the room come to a halt. “Just peachy.”

Haiden stared down at the bloody spot he held onto and clenched his jaw. “You need to get to a hospital.”

“Sure, how did I not think of that?” he stumbled to the wall with ragged breathing and realized his own sarcasm. “Sorry, I didn’t mean—I just—”

“I’ll get someone from Aileen, I’ll help you. Come on, I…lost people today. I don’t want to lose you too.”

Under different circumstances Cole would have paid more attention to the sentiment that sentence carried, but his mind could only take so much in. I lost people. He thought of the first shot fired in the ballroom, all the blood on the floor, “Aunt Alize… Haiden…I’m really sorry.” He shut his eyes in another attempt to make his thoughts align, but failed. Everything was a mess and people had been killed. “Oh God…”

“D-Don’t think about it. Let’s go.”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“Why not?”

Cole winced in pain as he tried to shift and his breathing turned shallow. “I don’t think…I can walk.”

Haiden placed a hand on his shoulder. “Where does it hurt?”

“Everywhere.”

“Do you remember what happened?” Haiden hoped he could keep Cole talking long enough to learn why they’d been so far away from help.

“Yeah, w-we were dancing, and she looked like an angel…” he’s thoughts drifted to the way her smile made her eyes crinkle, and how he wanted to memorize every single one of her freckles like he once did the constellations—but then he shook his head and continued, trying to even out his breathing. “And then umm, the shots began…and you went after that psycho girl” his wound stung and he clutched it tighter with a grunt “s-so we followed… and—my head is killing me.” He couldn’t finish the story with the constant pulsing inside his head.

As gently as possible, Haiden made him lie down. “Look at me, Cole.” But he didn’t. He kept staring at the ceiling breathing in pain. “Look at me.”

Cole closed his eyes. Focus, don’t go into shock. “What?” he looked up at his cousin and saw the hesitation written on his face.

“Y-You remember when we first played soccer, right?”

Letting out a breathy laugh Cole nodded “Yeah.”

“I remember seeing a scrawny kid who couldn’t kick the ball straight. But, you know, everyone was mesmerized by you.”

Between coughs he stared back at the ceiling. “By what…my horrible aim?”

Haiden shook his head. “This little kid who would not give up. You’d fall and get grass stains on your clothes. You were slow and clumsy, but everyone wanted to see you succeed.”

Lies. “I doubt you did.”

“No, I did. And that’s why I couldn’t stand you.”

“What does—” Cole paused, trying to hold in a grunt as his chest flared with pain. “What are you talking about?”

“I wanted you to succeed and that’s what I hated. Even I knew back then I’d loathe you, but you’d be who I’d aspire to be.”

“That—” That doesn’t make any sense… Why would he want to be like him? Cole couldn’t understand with the growing pain on his chest and the relentless pumping inside his ears, both accompanied by his increasingly rapid breathing. “You’re the Heir—you—you’re nice to people—and regal.” He gritted his teeth and shook his head. Nothing made sense to him, and no matter how hard he tried, it felt like none of the air he inhaled made it to his lungs. Why was Haiden even still helping him? “Why—why are you doing this?” He started hyperventilating, shock finally creeping its way in.

“You’re not allowed to die, Cole.”

He ignored the comment, clutching his wound again. “Y-you hate me—” His mind kept telling him it didn’t make sense for him to still be there

Haiden grabbed Cole’s face and gave him a stern look. Determination weaved in his features. “You’re not allowed to die.”

“I can’t—” Cole struggled to make his eyes focus on Haiden’s face, his chest violently rising and falling with each intake of air. “I can’t breathe.”

That’s when he heard the confused and absent mumbling of his name. He thought he was imagining it, but it was Aileen waking up.

She stood up, slowly taking in her surroundings while a headache settled in. “What…” she couldn’t remember her fight with the stray rebel or the shot she’d heard rung out before she passed out, but when her friend turned around to look at her with horror she was even more lost. “Haiden?”

“A-Aileen?”

“What happened…” things seemed to go slowly for her, and it took her brain a moment to acknowledge the heavy breathing in the background. When she realized who it was she rushed over to his side, ignoring the nausea she felt as she moved. “Cole!” She placed a hand on his cheek, registering his clammy skin and the paleness of his face. Hyperventilation wasn’t a good sign either. It was hard for her to concentrate and though she was not aware of the reason behind it, she still managed to recognize the symptoms and dread them. “He’s going into shock…”

“Aileen?” Cole winced, staring at her with difficulty and she could only rub a thumb over his cheekbone as a lump formed at her throat from the pain behind his eyes.

She gave Haiden a concerned glance. “He needs help—” she was hoping he could go get it, not wanting to leave Cole alone like this, but then her eyes caught on the sloppy bandage around Haiden’s leg. You could tell the injury had been treated correctly, but on a rush. She was too busy thinking about what to do and how much time remained to even try and figure out what had happened to him. The last thing she remembered was she’d been following Haiden—accompanied by Cole—after he’d gone after Cress…after the Queen had been shot.

However, there was no time for questions now and she pushed away the new wave of nausea that came over her. “You need to keep him conscious, and make sure his temperature stays the same.”

She began to stand up, a bit unsteadily, when Haiden stopped her. “Where are you going?”

“I’m going to get a doctor; we can’t move him like this.”

“W-Wait, you can’t leave,” she saw the panic in his eyes and felt pain for him. That was not how his birthday should have gone.

“Haiden, we need to get him help” she eyed his leg “fast.”

He seemed to accept it with a nod, letting out a deep breath. “Okay. Go, hurry.”

She tried to remember what her mother had taught her about emergencies like this—for once she thanked her for telling her all about the research she made for writing certain scenes. “Apply pressure to his wound” she said, running off, adrenaline taking over her “keep him alive!”

Once she was out of the room and in the hallways she tried to remember the fastest way to the hospital wing, yet had trouble concentrating with the ringing in her ears and the thought of Cole’s rapid breaths weakening as she left. Her eyes stung with the threat of tears and she was confused as to why. She trusted Haiden to do whatever he could to keep Cole alive, believing that no matter how much he refused to be civil with him, he must care for Cole the same way Cole did for him. Still, the thought of losing Cole made her heart shrink.

To her surprise she was tired a lot earlier than she should have been, and her headache persisted. She wondered if maybe she wasn’t going to be that much faster than a limping Haiden…but pushed through, determined, unaware that the impact her head had had against the wall in her fight with the rebel had caused some damage.

Cole barely registered the exchange Aileen had with Haiden as he lightly dozed off, feeling like he would faint any second. He only wished he’d had a bit more strength to make a joke when her head had hovered over his. Anything to get a smile on her face.

Meanwhile, Haiden bit his lip, worried he’d mess things up. He couldn’t mess things up. He couldn’t let Cole die; he would hate himself if he did.

Taking off his coat to apply pressure on the wound, as Aileen instructed, he tried to get his cousin’s attention again. “Look at me, Cole. It’ll be okay.”

Cole tried not to wince, clenching his hands into fists as the newly applied pressure appeared on his side. “That hurts.”

“You think I care? If it means saving your life, I’ll do anything.” He sounded annoyed, but Cole thought he heard some trembling in his voice.

“Why are you doing this?” he mumbled again, dizziness taking over him once more from the loss of blood. Haiden had once asked him a similar question and Cole didn’t need to think much about it, but now with the roles reversed he couldn’t understand why Haiden would want to help him.

“Because that’s what family’s for, asshole.”

Those were his words. Well, minus the asshole part. He recognized them from all those nights ago and frowned at Haiden, slurring as he tried to keep his eyes open. “You said…that meant nothing…”

I wouldn’t help you. No matter how much he tried to ignore them, he kept remembering Haiden’s words better than he wished.

“Maybe I changed my mind.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re my family.”

A weak smile spread across his face as he recognized the words coming out of Haiden’s mouth once more, trying to ignore the pain that still refused to leave his chest. “Did you really have to realize this w-when I’m about to die?”

“You’re not about to die.”

Cole felt the pressure of Haiden’s hands on his side, the stickiness of his own hand covered in blood, the sweat trickling down his face even though he’d now started shivering, his shallow breathing and lightheadedness. He felt like he was going to die.

“Haiden, I- I…” he swallowed and gasped for air “I don’t think…I can—” hang on much longer. He just wanted to close his eyes and rest.

“Shut up, Cole. J-Just…” Haiden felt panic again as he saw Cole slowly lose consciousness. Keep him alive, Aileen’s words echoed in his head and he grasped at anything that he thought would remotely keep him going. “What about Aileen?”

Cole glanced at him lazily. “What?”

“You… you’re in love with her, aren’t you?”

“I…” he paused before denying it. Did he love her? He definitely cared for her in more ways than he’d like to admit. “What makes you think that?”

“I watch you. It’s so obvious.”

“That’s not— she’s in the Selection. It doesn’t matter.” He shook his head slowly. “I shouldn’t have liked her…I-I’m sorry.” He didn’t want any more troubles with Haiden or his Selection. His father had caused enough drama himself in the past one, so he’d avoided it since the beginning.

“Cole, I don’t love her. We’re friends, just friends. If she… wants you, then I have no problem with you pursuing her.”

“You don’t?” He found that hard to believe. How could he not fall for someone like her when he could? “Still…it was your Selection.”

“It’s not like I own them. And I love Aileen. She’s my best friend. If you’re what she wants, then why should I keep her away from you?”

“I… don’t even know if I am what she wants.”

“Well, you’ll never know if you die, right?”

Cole laughed between coughs and stared at him before wincing and looking back at the ceiling. “I-I’m really tired.” All of it had drained him.

“Well, you’re not allowed to go to sleep.”

Cole sighed. “Thanks for the reminder.”

Haiden freaked out when Cole stopped breathing. He yelled at him to wake up, shaking his shoulder frantically. This can’t be happening. He looked for a pulse and found it, which confused him even further.

That’s when he heard Aileen’s voice yelling from afar. “I’m here!” She appeared a few seconds later on the doorway. Not carrying anything herself, and still filled with adrenaline, she’d made it through the hallway faster than the medics.

Haiden let out a breath of relief once more. “Aileen, thank God, he—he passed out. I-I couldn’t stop it.”

She ran over to him with alarm and kneeled, quickly placing a hand on Cole’s neck, searching for a pulse. Passing out doesn’t mean fatal yet. She found it just like Haiden had before, but weak from the low blood pressure. “Why is he not breathing?”

“I-I don’t know. He just became like this.”

“What! How long?” she reached for Cole’s limp hand and accidentally grabbed the one covered in blood. She clenched her jaw and stared at the dark red liquid in horror, mumbling his name. She dared not look at the actual wound.

“Save him. Please.” Haiden was pleading and she looked at him with consternation. The ringing she’d felt in her ears while running through the hallways become louder. She couldn’t lose Cole.

“I-I…” The doctors came in, saving her from having to think of a solution herself.

She felt foggy as they asked them to step away, but before she could even register the request a hand grasped her arm and pulled her aside into a hug.

“Thank God you’re okay.” Haiden’s voice was barely a whisper over her ear, his hands wrapped around her, as if trying to shelter her from everything else.

She only stood there, feeling the remains of Cole’s blood on her hand and remembering Queen Alize falling to the ground as she was shot. The Queen. Haiden’s mother. Here she was crying over someone who wasn’t even her family. She felt selfish, but her worry for Cole did not leave her. “I-I’m sorry.” Her eyes welled up with tears.

“Sh, don’t talk yet.” his voice was gentle, but Aileen couldn’t listen to him.

“I’m really sorry” she finally wrapped her arms around his torso, crying as she pulled him closer. “Things shouldn’t have been like this…”

“No… they shouldn’t. And it makes me think that we only have so much time on this earth,” he began, cupping her cheek, “So don’t spend it wondering what could have been.”

She didn’t know Haiden sensed her feelings for Cole—feelings that she herself was barely starting to understand—so tears just streamed down her cheeks as she stared at how the doctors hauled Cole on a stretcher out of the room to take him to the medical wing. “You shouldn’t have gone after Cress…we were worried you’d get yourself killed.”

Haiden shook his head, trying to forget about that decision himself. “That doesn’t matter anymore.”

Aileen wiped her tears away. “It does matter, Haiden. If something like this happens again I don’t want you to get hurt” she felt her emotions railing out of her grasp. It was just too much to take in at once. Normally she would have been able to handle it, but the hit she’d taken to her head had scrambled things up. She took a step back, placing a hand over her forehead as the headache returned. “W-What if both of you had been shot? What would I have done then?”

“It’ll be okay, Aileen. It’s over.”

“Over?” she paused, trying her best to focus, then glanced down at her dress, gulping at the strains Cole’s blood had left on her side when he’d carried her. “W-We don’t even know if he’ll be okay…”

“He’ll be okay. The doctors won’t let another Schreave die today.” Haiden clenched his jaw and managed to hold her concerned gaze for long enough before staring at his feet.

She shut her eyes and rubbed them, feeling suddenly tired again. He lost someone, what’s wrong with you? “I shouldn’t be like this with you, I’m sorry. I don’t feel like myself right now.”

“It’s… terrifying when someone you love is dying. Don’t be sorry.”

“No, that’s why it’s not fair. You’re being nice and understanding and what happened today—I should be doing the same with you.” Why wasn’t she? There was a simple answer she wasn’t aware about.

“We’re all different. It’s okay.”

“I-I’m glad you’re okay too.” She walked back him, intending to hug him again, but stopped to close her eyes when she felt the floor beneath her tilt.

Haiden frowned at her unbalance and took the step to her himself. “Are… are you okay?”

“Um,” it took her a moment to find the right words. “Yeah… I’ve just seen a bit dizzy. The headache isn’t helping.”

“Do you know what happened? Did you hurt yourself?”

“I-I don’t remember much of what happened after we encountered that rebel…” she reached for his arm to steady herself.

“Have you seen a doctor?”

“Well, I just saw a bunch just now, what do you mean?”

He raised an eyebrow at her. “Did you hit your head?”

“I…” She paused, unable to remember the way she’d tackled the stray rebel to stop him from shooting Cole. She’d managed to save him from an instantly fatal hit, but afterward had been shoved into the wall with force. “I’m not sure…maybe?”

Haiden didn’t like the sound of that. “Come on, let’s walk to the hospital.”

She followed him with unsteady footsteps. “Didn’t Cole say what happened exactly?”

“It seems like no one knows.”

“Hmm, well in his defense he was probably slightly delirious from the blood loss.” She frowned at the ceiling, her thoughts jumping to a completely different line of conversation. A vague realization with her currently scattered concentration, which barely grazed the roots of her true feelings. “I think I like him. Are you sure you still hate him?”

“I’m not sure of anything right now. But he’ll be okay. Have you… heard from anyone?”

She started to shake her head in response—then decided not to add to her lack of balance and stopped. “I was too busy finding the doctors to recognize anyone else. I don’t think I saw any of the girls near them though…so that’s good.”

“Thank God.”

“Are you… particularly worried about someone else?”

“Maybe” he mumbled, giving her a sideways glance, knowing that she still wondered who could be the girl he’d started liking. “I’m glad…everyone is okay. Or almost.”

“Me too.” She let it pass without asking more. He’d tell her when he was ready. “I know I’ll be out next week, but would it be too awful if I sneaked in every now and then?” She half-joked with a wary grin. She wanted to be able to talk with him, and Naomi, and Mila…and Cole.

You better be alive when I get there you dimwit.

Haiden brought her back from her mental scolding. “You should stay. Not here, but close, you know? In Angeles.”

“I will,” she realized she’d forgotten to tell him that was exactly the plan. “My parents will be back here soon anyway, I might as well stay. Don’t forget we promised to gossip…” she stared at back at the hallway thoughtfully “I’m pretty sure we did at least.”

He laughed softly. “We better. And you promised to make me try on the purple suit.”

Aileen squeezed his hand with a smile, “Yes, that too. Also…” a wave of nausea came over her once more and she stumbled “you said you’d give Cole a chance.”

Haiden reached out in time to give her support with his arms and she tightened her grip around them. “Aileen…” he gently set her down on the ground and held her head.

She in turn tried to focus on his face. “I-I’m sorry, I don’t understand what’s wrong. Don’t worry about it…I’m just tired.”

“You probably have a concussion or something. You said you hit your head, right?”

“Um, I…I think so?” she still couldn’t remember, but the prince was right as to why. The impact to her head had given her a mild concussion. That had caused most of her unsteadiness, lethargy, lack of focus, and slightly off behavior. “We’re almost to the hospital, aren’t we?” She tried to stand up, nevertheless regretted it as soon as she did, sitting down again. Haiden was silent for a moment, unsure of what he should do.

He wanted to believe she would be fine, but also wanted her to get help soon as possible. Just in case. He’d taken enough risks for one day. That’s how, ignoring his leg injury, he resolved in hoisting her up into his arms and began walking. Aileen closed her eyes so her head would stop spinning and nuzzled her head against his chest with fatigue.

“Doesn’t your leg hurt?” she wondered with a drowsy mumble.

He went slowly and limped slightly, but didn’t emit a sound of pain, not wanting to worry her any more than necessary. “Yeah, but… it doesn’t matter anymore.” If Cole could carry her with an open shotgun wound he sure as hell would do it with a patched up leg.

“I’m sorry…” she felt like a burden, yet refused to doze off into sleep as she listened to Haiden’s heartbeat. “You’re a good friend, you know?”

He looked down at her, part of him not believing her words. “Shh, you have to stay awake for me. Just until you see the doctor.”

She barely registered his request. “Do you think I’m a good friend?”

“Of course you are.” She was one of the few friends he actually had.

That brought a faint smile to her face. “Do you know what your present was?”

“No.”

“It’s a-” it took her a moment to recollect her words “a photo album. I included all of the pictures I took since the Selection started. Of you, the other girls, the palace…” a mischievous grin appeared on her face “there’s a couple of Cole, perfect for blackmail. He looks adorable when he thinks no one’s looking.”

In that moment, though she could only vaguely remember it on her state, her mind went to the first picture she’d ever taken of Cole—as soon as he’d seen the camera pointed at his face he’d shoved it aside, Aileen had almost dropped it, and in revenge had pushed him into the fountain where she finally got the chance to snap the picture—it was one of her favorites. His wet hair flopped on his forehead and, even though he’d wished to scowl at her, a radiant smile had spread across his face. She’d kept the original picture.

“I can’t wait to see it.” Haiden grinned, and she finally opened her eyes to look at him.

“I hope you like it…” her hazy thoughts drifted back to Cole and she felt his dry blood on her hand, her smile wavering. “Y-You really think he’ll be okay?”

“Of course he will be. We have the best doctors in Illéa.”

“Right” she nodded sluggishly—wishing she could close her eyes and sleep—but not wanting to leave Haiden carrying her through silent halls. “Will you be okay?”

“I will. Somehow.”

It sounded like the truth, yet…“You’re not allowed to lie to me anymore.”

“I’m not lying.”

Her eyelids felt heavy. “Promise?”

“Promise.”

“Good.” She nodded again, closing her eyes. “You’re really comfy, you know.”

“You’re delirious.”

“I’m just tired.” She felt like she’d already mentioned it a hundred times.

“Well, we’re almost there, so too bad.”

She ignored his comment and wearily poked his chest without opening her eyes. “You’re the delirious one who refuses to fix things with his own sister. She didn’t even look you in the eye once today.”

“Elaine and I needed some time apart. Even now it’s best to stay away because she doesn’t like to be smothered. But as soon as I can, I’ll fix it.”

She snuggled on his arms again, giving up on staying awake. “Advice from the girl with a brother: don’t force it, but at least show her you care.”

“Duly noted.”

They arrived at the hospital a minute or so later and the medics rushed to help, a man taking Aileen out of his arms as Haiden slumped on a chair, explaining what he knew and suspected to have happened. His leg throbbed, but he ignored it, just watching how a nurse did her best to gently wake Aileen into awareness again.

She slowly came back to her senses and replied to whatever they asked her. Haiden could tell she seemed confused and uncertain by some of the questions, but the doctors didn’t seem alarmed. Her eyes however, kept wandering around the room every so often as if she expected to see someone. He was pretty sure Cole was that someone.

Cole…he sighed, standing up to approach a nurse, cursing in his head at the idiot for getting hurt. The nurse averted her gaze and explained he was still being attended to, yet stressed that it did not mean he was in any particular danger, and that he just needed to be stabilized, most likely requiring some monitoring after that as well. Haiden felt relieved, though still a bit concerned, then he nodded and the nurse continued with something else.

He stayed to make sure Aileen would be fine—and also, though he wouldn’t admit it, to wait and see if he’d receive any more news regarding his cousin—by the end of it all. Aileen was finally allowed to sleep. The doctors confirmed it to be a concussion and she’d been napping for a while when Haiden noticed Elaine arguing with a guard from afar. Her arm was bandaged, but besides that she seemed okay. As for the guard, he was unharmed. Haiden was pretty sure it was Nathan, a second generation in the guard that his sister had befriended when younger.

He tried not to stare much, but he still saw the way Nathan looked at his sister, and the way he reached for her hand with a pained expression, mumbling something as she looked the other way with a slight nod.

Haiden watched him leave and then glanced back at Elaine. Her shoulders slumped as she sighed and hugged herself, staring down at the floor beneath her.

Maybe it was time to fix things and show he cared.

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#cole #haiden #fic #colleen blooming

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