#go feral sweetie ur doing great

[cloneloverrrrr]

Hii! First things first, I LOVE ur fics and ur blog! It's my first time requesting a fic since I'm always worried about overwhelming the writers. No pressure at all to write the fic okay??

I wanted to ask if you could write some spicy Crosshair x fem reader? Soo for the prompt I'm thinking Crosshair probably gets so jealous and worked up over the day watching you(reader) interact closely with other men, specially regs. He makes sure to mark you up and kriff you so good so you never forget who you belong to. Lots of dirty talking. He's sweet in the aftercare tho since he's a softie.

Also, if he spits in ur mouth that would be the cherry on top and chef's kiss, but it doesn't have to have that 🙊🙈🙈

Hiiiii sweetie 🥹

Thank you! That’s so so so kind to say it made me smile 🤩😁

I am so here for giving sexy Crosshair some loving 🫠🫠urhh he’s just a HOTTIE! I hope I captured him in the right way as I’ve never wrote for him and I hope you like this likkle bit of filth 🥵🥵hehehe

Dividers by my best boo @idontgetanysleep 🫶🏻

𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗕𝗲𝗹𝗼𝗻𝗴 𝗧𝗼 𝗠𝗲- 𝗢𝗻𝗲 𝗦𝗵𝗼𝘁⠀

𝗥𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀:🔞 𝗠𝗶𝗻𝗼𝗿𝘀 𝗗𝗢 𝗡𝗢𝗧 𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗮𝗰𝘁 𝗠𝗮𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗻𝘁

𝗣𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: 𝗖𝗹𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗙𝗼𝗿𝗰𝗲 𝟵𝟵 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘀𝘀𝗵𝗮𝗶𝗿 𝘅 𝗙𝗲𝗺!𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿, 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿 𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗲𝗿𝘁

𝗪𝗼𝗿𝗱 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗻𝘁: 1244

𝗪𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀: 𝗦𝗠𝗨𝗧 𝗦𝗠𝗨𝗧 𝗦𝗠𝗨𝗧 𝗦𝗠𝗨𝗧 𝗦𝗠𝗨𝗧, 𝗣𝗼𝗿𝗻 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗹𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗻𝗼 𝗽𝗹𝗼𝘁, 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘀𝘀𝗵𝗮𝗶𝗿 𝗯𝗲𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗮 𝗗𝗢𝗠, 𝘃𝗮𝗴𝗮𝗶𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝗳𝗶𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴, 𝗻𝗶𝗰𝗸𝗻𝗮𝗺𝗲 𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗸, 𝗣 𝗶𝗻 𝗩 𝘀𝗲𝘅, 𝗿𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵 𝘀𝗲𝘅, 𝘂𝗻𝗽𝗿𝗼𝘁𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝘀𝗲𝘅, 𝗰𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗺𝗽𝗶𝗲, 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘀𝘀𝗵𝗮𝗶𝗿 𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗱𝗮 𝗯𝗲𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘀𝘄𝗲𝗲𝘁 𝗮𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗲𝗻𝗱 𝗶𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘀𝗾𝘂𝗶𝗻𝘁

Another long day of listening to Nala Se , yes her knowledge is second to none and you had learnt a great deal but you could think of something else you’d much rather be doing right now.

You wonder at the far depths of your mind why you had been transferred from the medical base on Coruscant to Kamino however deep down you weren’t one to complain. If it meant you spent more time with a certain clone then maker you’d stay here forever and always. Crosshair had intrigued you from day one a total asshole but stars above you wanted him, his domineering stance, his conceited aura, the feral look in his eyes each time you pass each other, the animalistic look a one that could kill each time a reg gets a little to close to you. Yet nothing had happened and you were so desperate for his touch it kept you awake at night.

Finally back at your private quarters you had a chance to relax your mind and body until a loud knock pulled you from your thoughts.

“One moment” you call out pulling your robes over to give you some form of decorum.

Crosshair stands at your door leaned against the frame, swirling that toothpick at the side of his mouth, his arms crossed over his muscular lithe body, he glared at you, his jaw was clenching yet he remained silent.

“Crosshair- are y-you ok? What’s wrong?” You ask confused chewing your bottom lip.

You swallowed hard and the stoney silence did nothing to hide it. He scanned your body approving the silk of the fabric draped around you hugging your curves.

“Crosshair- what’s going on?” The authority in your tone causes him to raise a brow. A low chuckle escapes his lips. His usual expression unreadable yet something primal, something dark flashed behind his amber eyes.

He moves towards you closing the distance between your bodies, tension already boiling over. You quickly cover the remainder of your bare skin, Crosshair being as perceptive as ever notices. His gloved hands clutch at your wrists.

“Ah ah ah” his voice demanding and oh maker so fucking sexy.

“Take it off” he demanded.

Your eyes widened and a breath hitched in your throat as you slowly unwrapped your robe letting it drop the ground exposing your naked body. One hand reaches out to skim across your delicate flesh.

“Good girl- you don’t know what you do to me do you?” He growled his eyes blown wild with lust. He stalks you, backing you closer to the cool of the wall with each step he takes.

“What I do to you…?” Your voice bewildered.

“The regs… I’ve seen how close you work with them I’ve seen the way they look at you princess” he rasps , caging you in at the wall both fists planted at the side your head.

“Could the regs do this princess?” He scoffed whispering against your ear. He plunged two fingers into your moist core you gasped and wriggled in response. His fingers began to explore your tight pussy sliding in and out at a gentle pace. His free hand clasped around your throat, only allowing for a small amount of your to fill your lungs.

“Oh Cross-“ your soft moans cut off by his lips crashing against yours, the kiss was hot heavy and possessive. His fingers begin to relentlessly slide in and out, your juices soaking his fingers.

You moan and pant into his mouth, tongues and teeth collide as you begin to grind against his palm, a beautiful friction buzzing inside of you shooting blinding pleasure throughout your body. His pace only quickens pushing you closer and closer that sweet release.

Crosshair breaks away from the kiss pulling his fingers from your wet cunt. His eyes lock with yours. He studies your face before forcefully grabbing your chin the wetness from his fingers damp against your skin.

“Open” he growled

Obediently you part your lips and open your mouth looking up at this clone you’ve wanted for so long allowing Crosshair to spit in your mouth. Swallowing his spit you ran your tongue across your teeth, a feral glint sparkled in your eyes.

“Good little princess now bend over for me.” He hissed through gritted teeth.

You got on all fours for Crosshair back arched and ass sticking out , your fluttering cunt anxiously waiting for him to ruin you. He positioned himself behind you rubbing his throbbing length up and down your slit, quiet gasps fell from your lips.

“Please” you plead

“Patience princess” he scolded, his voice low, gravely.

His thick pulsating member sheathed fully inside of you brutally filling you with no warning. He began fucking into you mercilessly. Each thrust hard and deep smacking off that spongy spot your legs trembling as he fucks into you with such force. He leans down nipping and biting at your flesh relishing in the way you squirm and groan as his teeth mark you.

The sounds of wet squelching, his balls smacking against your skin and pitiful grunts and moans fill the small room.

“That’s it take me princess take my fucking cock in your cunt I know how fucking much you wanted it”

He growls into your neck placing open mouth wet kisses where his lips can reach.

“Uh fuck oh Crosshair harder” you whine and groan underneath him , the pace almost painful but never taking away from the burning coil tightening inside you.

“Regs won’t fuck you the way I do princess- you belong to me”

Your pelvic muscles tighten, the blistering heat ablaze across your body burning more and more, sharp gratifying sparks tingle through each vein as Crosshair continues his relentless pounding, your cunt throbs around him you moan louder gripping the soft sheets under your clamy skin.

Your edging so close to that beautiful feeling of pure rapture. You feel every vein every rib of Crosshairs fat cock fucking you senseless. He can feel the way your walls flutter around him, his thrusts erratic as he leans down into you clutching your neck the other engulfing your heavy breast.

“Fuck” Crosshair groans sinking his teeth into your neck.

“I’m gonna uh fuck Crosshair I’m gonna cum” you whine, eyes screwed shut, your breathing laboured.

Rocking your hips back into his harsh thrusts whimpering incoherently your body betrays you and cum hard, your eyes roll back , your vision blurs stars shooting across the back of your eyes , your pussy convulses.

Screams and moans floor the air.

“You sound so fucking pretty when you cum for me like a good little whore” Crosshair groans are strained as his calloused fingers curl roughly into your hips.

Your pathetic moans cause him to succumb to the blinding gratification and he coats your walls with his warm seed.

“Mmmm fuck good girl” his voice low husky, dark.

Creamy cum spills out from your ruined pussy dribbling down your thighs. Your bodies fall limp against each other. You feel his lips graze against your shoulder blade.

Tender sweet kisses litter your salty skin, a taste he gladly welcomes.

Crosshair slides of out of you achingly slow taking pleasure in the way your face contorts knowing you enjoy how this feels. You watch as he begins circling your clit before pushing back some of the mixed cum that falls freely from your swollen cunt.

A dark feral look splashes across his face.

“Lay back princess i want to taste that sweet pretty cunt.”

TAGLIST- @hellhound5925 @lune-de-miel-au-paradis @idontgetanysleep @hello-there-cyarika @cw80831 @dangraccoon @trixie2023 @jules-1999 @justanothersadperson93 @kimiheartblade @dukeoftheblackstar @secretthegriffin @n0vqni @eternal-transience-spice @clonelovr @reader6898

If you want to be added or removed LMK😃🩷

[godborn]

i’m gay and can’t resist the opportunity to be sappy so here’s a january 1st post to let all of my mutuals know that you are loved by me whether you like it or not and that i’m grateful for every single one of you and am looking forward to getting to know you more in 2024!

when i returned to this rpc after a year long hiatus where a lot of stuff was just going wrong in my life, i was a little nervous that i’d have trouble finding interactions and building relationships both ic and ooc. it was a little difficult at first, but i’m so thankful i stuck it out because right around the corner were some very cool & special people who are not only talented writers and masters of characterization, but genuinely kind & fun people to talk to & get to know.

this post is dedicated to all of my lovely mutuals whether we’ve written together for months or u just followed me today, but there are a few people i want to be gay toward individually under the cut 🥳🏳️‍🌈🩷

@vialaviolenza / @valoroso : my beloved mortis!! you were my first new friend that i made upon the end of my hiatus & i adore you to the moon & back. i knew you were special from the moment i found out you basically live a stone’s throw away from me lol but more than that, you have been such a blessing to me. you’re always willing to listen to my ramblings & crazy ideas & our threads are always fuckin based, so you genuinely have it all & i’m excited for us to become closer in this new year!! 💚💚💚

@lovesigned : bella, i’m kissing u. i remember when you first followed me and we messaged back and forth about how we loved each other’s writing and were fucking nerds about classical allusions & mythology & all that. even now i’m still in awe of how beautifully your prose reads btw. but beyond that you’re probably the funniest person on this website & going absolutely feral with u is always a good time lmfao. i love everything we’ve ever plotted and written and i will love everything we will plot and write in the new year. u are so sexy and cool mwah

@blueshiftting : MEME MY BELOVED u are genuinely the sweetest person ever in the world and you deserve every good thing ever in the new year. not to mention cordelia is a baddie & the immaculate energy you have created for her is untouchable, truly one of the most well-written ocs i’ve encountered. i owe u my life for making the fuckhouse server because it’s always such a vibe in there & it’s been great getting closer to everyone in there, including you.

@rejectshumanity : the coolest person on this website actually,,, but also a total sweetie that i’ve loved every second of talking to. dani when i say i stan you heavily i mean it you genuinely have Thee best take on dio & manage to blend the serious & unserious parts of his character immaculately. i’m excited for when ur inspiration returns to you because i think we all want to see how you will absolutely kill it in the 2024 season lol. either way, you’re a gem & i’m looking forward to growing our friendship in the new year!!

@praeteritus-memories : lu … u are my homie fr like the only constant thing in my life in this rpc for the past 3 (ALMOST 4???) years. coming back to writing with you again has been like returning to a warm hug which i really fucking needed after everything i went through in 2022-23 😭 i love everything we do together & everything we explore in our threads, they’re always a blast & i’m relieved we cannot always pick up where we left off without things being awkward lol. i hope this year treats you kindly, you deserve it luv 🩷

@ironleonine : GEO MY LOVE IM SO SORRY I KNEW I HAD LEFT SOMEONE OUT THIS IS LESBIAN ON LESBIAN CRIME . anyway you are the literal sweetest, kindest, most fun person to talk to be it ic or ooc. i will start 10 million different threads with you and idc i will love every single one. you have such a talent for bringing your characters to life, i will never NOT enjoy writing with you wtf. our chats are always the best even if they’re full of the most random shit lol i feel like you really understand me & the chaotic chemical soup that is my brain. when i marry you in 2024, what then?

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

Haiii hello :3 I’m back again with more stsg thoughts !! So,, I feel like we can all recognise that teen stsg are complete and utter losers BUT there are quite a few scenes in the anime that make it obvious that the both of them are capable of being serious to protect people when it’s necessary.. and it made me think of how they would react if you got seriously injured hmmm HMMMMM (this totally isn’t yummy to me because I wanna see feral protective stsg…. Totally…..) or maybe it’s a lil like when Toji told sugu that he killed satoru hhhh … like ur all on a mission together and u get separated somehow and satoru is like “where tf did y/n go 🙁🙁” and whoever they’re fighting comes outta nowhere like “oh I killed th-“ 💥💥💥💥💥💥 ‘n it turns out you’re just a little injured 😭😭 but I feel like they’d be sooo dramatic and worried about you :( and satoru “jokes” that now they won’t be able to leave u alone incase u get injured again…he’s just gonna have to keep an eye on u and protect u forever and ever (he means it) and sugu js goes full mother mode like he’s forcing u to stay in bed, makes you soup, reminds u to take pain meds and listens to every word of advice the doctor gives to help u recover from the injury 💔💔 hrherh I know this wasn’t as long as my usual asks but I thought it was cute and I’ve been thinking about the stupid losers all day… can’t wait to see the sashisu thing uve been working on too !! I love them sooo much I know shoko doesn’t get much love in this fandom :( loser boys (stsg) taking up too much of the spotlight smh…. Move outta the way…. It’s bae shokos turn…. (Joke I still love stsg💔) but she’s my cute tired loser wife with a coffee addiction and I hold her very dear to my heart she’s my princess with a disorder (the disorder is depression) hehe I hope u have a wonderful day/night/whatever time it is for uuu !! — stsg anon !! 💗🌸

had to go into pixlr to make this r u proud of me…. HEHEH STSG ANON MY SWEETIE my number one supplier of treats <33333 i loveloveloveeee feral protective stsg…. ure so real…… they’re both wolfboys at heart i think .

but ohhhh u always get them perfectly….. toru joking around to lighten to mood (but he’s actually not joking at all) while sugu goes mother hen mode……… :((( they’re both sooo so worried. there’s nothing they wouldn’t do to protect u!!!….. one scenario i keep thinking of is reader falling down a set of stairs or slipping on a patch of ice when it’s cold n slippery outside…. and spraining their ankle… so stsg has to take care of them and they’re both just. Wrecks. bc they feel sooo guilty and they hate seeing u in pain….. i imagine that it’d hit sugu extra hard so toru tries to be more serious and mature than usual to make up for it!! idk i just feel like sugu is especially prone to blaming himself over things like this :((( even if it wasn’t his fault at all…. and he tries to distract himself from the shame by tending to u like a baby chick. makes u food and carries u around the house…. sits u down on his lap and tries to distract u from the way his eyes gloss over w tears bc he can’t stop looking at the cast on ur foot and he just feels so incredibly guilty :((((((((….. sniffle. i wanna hug him.

i got carried away phfkdjkdkf BUT I LOVE YOUUU STSG ANON and i love this concept sm…….. they’re both papabears :((( i feel like satoru gets a lot more serious when you’re injured, while suguru gets more meek than usual…. it’s kind of a reversal of their usual roles but it’s great bc they balance each other out !! :3 like. in the scenario above i feel like satoru might get frustrated bc they told you to be careful not to slip on the ice or whatever but suguru is there to remind him that you’re in pain and that it was an accident :(( and when it’s a more minor injury i think suguru is the one to get slightly condescending bc why would you go out into the rain without a jacket?? /obviously/ you’d catch a cold, dummy. and satoru is there to defend your honour with his life LMAO…… they’re sooo so silly.

ALSOOOO STSG ANON ….. i’m so glad that ure excited for the sashisu fic 😭😭😭 that made me so happy!!! i agree sm, shoko is sooo underrated she’s my little meow meow i love her sm :((

she’s my cute tired loser wife with a coffee addiction and I hold her very dear to my heart she’s my princess with a disorder (the disorder is depression)

YOU’RE SO REALLLLL PDHFJJDJF MY BEAUTIFUL PRINCESS WITH A DISORDER <3…. i knew i could trust u stsg anon, she’s SUCH a loser and we don’t talk abt it enough smh. she’s literally soooo similar to stsg like they’re all the same… soft sappy silly little losers…… oh how i love them so <33

[jastacular]

At first I felt bad for Haru, considering how he got shot and all but then THIS HAPPENS

DAISUKE

UR BOYFRIEND WENT FUCKING FERAL

[nuitthegoddess]

I’m shipping you with Crowley cuz someone needs to straighten out that walking avatar of nonsense out 😂

(Him or Crewel because I feel like you’d be the power couple of ‘ur doin great, sweetie’ stage mom energy)

YES I am with him to make him suffer his consequences of letting the teenagers (well half PFPFPFP) do all the work so he sit back and watch 👀 so he must deal with satan (me)

When he not doing all of the work. I put on the maid outfit bc he knows shit is gonna go down so runs away while I evil laugh like a maniac 👀👀👀

(Crewel just tames the beast by giving me coffee and tellin me not act feral PFPFPF)

[sinkix]

Haikyuu!!│Boys going grocery shopping w/ you! HC’s│Ft. Bokuto, Nishinoya, Terushima, Kuroo & Kunimi

I had this late night idea and just HAD to follow through, the chaos would be O F F T H E C H A R T S. Thank you to @deathcab4daddy​ for helping me brainstorm some good characters for this post lmao I love you bby and can’t wait to do a collab. <3

E N J O Y ~ 

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

BOKUTO:

WHEN I TELL YOU THIS BOI PICKS UP EVERYTHING IN SIGHT LIKE A 6 YEAR OLD

 I FUCKING MEAN IT.

“(Y/N) we need this” 

“Bokuto we do not need a 7th jar of peanut butter.”

 “But (Y/N) it has a squirrel on the front-”

“BOKUTO I SWEAR TO GOD”

Tries to drift on the edge of the cart like something straight outta CSGO and the cart nearly obliterates under his weight.

V e r y l o u d u n e c c e s s a r i l y.

Everyone always stares at y’all when you’re going through the isles bc ur literally escorting a man-child sprawled in a shopping cart who’s going “OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO” at everything he sees like he’s a toddler at the zoo who’s never encountered a chimpanzee before.

Unless you have a bottomless bank account do NOT take him shopping of any kind he is LETHAL.

When you’re at the check-out he turns it into a basketball competition and tries to launch everything perfectly on to the conveyor belt.

Volleyball player? Nah this sis with the NBA now.

Do not ask him to go get something, he will return with at least 9 items you didn’t need and everything BUT the item you requested

He turned up with a whole ass pineapple, a jar of jam, a stick of butter and a bottle of olive oil.

Like,,,where is the correlation in those items???

Once made the mistake of asking him to grab some pads from the hygiene section and specified it HAD to be with wings

Boy showed up ten minutes later and looking very confuzzled.

You questioned why he has a pack of wingless pads in one hand and a can of red bull in the other.

He said it’s because they didn’t have any with wings so he figured the Redbull would suffice and do the job for you.

i-

NISHINOYA:

Can literally fit him in the little cart seat made for kids and he LOVES it lmaoooo IT’S SO CUTE MY HEART.

HE JUST SWINGS HIS LEGS EXCITABLY WHILE YOUR GETTING STUFF AAAAAAA

Ppl give you such weird looks though bc you have a guy who’s at least 14 years older than the intended demographic sitting there and raising his hands in elation over you copping a cookie dough pie and chucking it in.

Again, another who is VERY LOUD FOR NO REASON AT ALL.

Get’s out of the cart after a while bc his legs be growing numb and begins roaming around.

Someone came back with a feral Noya in hand stating “Is this your child” WNDKJWEFNWJEF.

M’AM HE’S LIKE 18 EXCUSE YOU.

Was salty about it for the rest of the day.

Just ruffle his hair and call him Senpai 

Problem solved.

Picks up tons of exotic fruit that look more like plastic or fuzzy poisonous plants and begs you to get them.

“Noya what the fuck is that.”

“...a Pitaya.”

“...”

“Can we get it-”

“no.”

“(Y/N)-”

“I SAID NO DAMMIT”

Last time you bought some strange fruit he took it to practise and got Tanaka to spike it LMAOOO

IT SPLATTERED E V E R Y W H E R E

AND OVER DAICHI’S SHIRT.

He begged you to no longer allow Noya to purchase weird fruits from then on since he is like a child with a nerf gun.

He once picked up a phat wrinkly purple fruit and turned to you asking if it was an overgrown raisin.

“Noya sweetie that’s a Date.”

HE FULLY TSK’ED AND THREW IT BACK SINCE IT REMINDED HIM OF DATE TECH I CAN’T.

My boy out here defending Asahi even in the Grocery Isles.

We stan a loyal king.

TERUSHIMA:

Another one who tries to stand on the ledge and the cart wheels almost collapse because it wasn’t designed to hold the weight of a young adult.

Oh young adult??? Sorry I mean’t MAN CHILD.

He treats a shopping experience as a time to practise his aim apparently because he ALWAYS THROWS SHIT AT YOU TO THE POINT YOU’RE THREATENED TO BE KICKED OUT.

Definitely picks up phallic looking objects and places them against his crotch, snorting and saying “Like what you see (Y/N)?”

Homeboy is stood there in front of a wife and child presenting his cucumber appendage for the world to see.

He once grabbed a pair of fat ass melons and pressed them against his chest, shaking them and belting the lyrics to ‘My Milkshake’ while begging you to SQUEEZE HIS MELONS.

“Look (Y/N) they’re bigger than yours!”

I just- 

I give up.

Constantly tries to sneak mutli-packs of energy drinks into the cart to the point you’re convinced he is going to keel over from heart failure and kidney stones by the age of 20.

Has his airpods in 90% of the time and treats the isles as his personal dance floor.

He busting them MOVES and performing the MJ moonwalk while in the dairy section.

ONCE HE SLID TOO FAST AND SLIPPED ON HIS REAR IN FRONT OF LIKE 12 PEOPLE LMAOO

He was DEAD silent the rest of the trip.

Probably the most serene shopping experience you’ve had to date.

The checkout clerks occasionally hit on Mr. Sore-Ass over here.

Until he opens his mouth and they realise he’s a total dolt and question how you have the patience for him.

You don’t know either honestly.

The whole bagging experience is spent with them shooting you sympathetic glances as if to say ‘sis you shoulda’ left him at home’.

Yes, yes you should have.

Never a dull moment with Teru as your shopping partner.

KUROO:

LITERALLY LIKE A MIDDLE-AGED MAN OR A TODDLER WHEN Y’ALL GO SHOPPING THERE IS NEVER AN EVEN MIDDLE-GROUND.

Frequently cracks lame-ass food puns or dad jokes that make you want to crawl into a hole and die.

You have competitions on who can come up with the most and the loser always faces a penalty.

Kuroo and creating penalties do NOT mix safely so you better hope you win.

“I love you a waffle lot.” 

Proceeds to hold up a wrapped waffle.

Ok that one was kinda cute you’ll let it slide.

“I ap-peach-iate you Kuroo.”

Cue HyenaLaugh.mp3

“Want a pizza me baby? Bitch peas, doughnut take me lightly.”

You changed your mind.

You didn’t talk to him the duration of that shopping experience, no penalty could be as horrifying as what just came out of his mouth.

“(Y/N)... sometimes I feel like you don’t carrot all.”

You slapped him with said carrot and obviously had to pay for it after.

You forced him to eat it raw.

He is the definition of Neutral disaster when you go shopping.

Shitty food puns aside, he is actually very responsible when making sure you both get what you need.

Not without tons of poking, prodding, and blowing into your ear while you’re trying to decide what ingredients to buy for dinner.

You contemplated serving him a plate of bubbling snot and moulded broccoli seasoned with rosemary.

Bone apple teeth, bitch.

Ofc you didn’t because he always pulls out the puppy eyes and cuddles card after since he knows he’s well and truly rattled your patience lmao.

Actually picks really healthy food options?? Being the captain of a team he has the responsibility of keeping his health in top condition and leading by example so at least he knows the right ingredients to make a bomb-ass and nutritious meal ig.

Y’all always bicker and tease each other at the checkout which is usually great amusement for the clerk serving you as they often smirk and perceive you as an old married couple.

Which tbh you kinda are, it feels like it at least.

Still such a big asshole though lmao you never leave the store without your sanity being scathed.

KUNIMI:

Honestly just wanted an excuse to make jokes at the expense of the Aoba Johsai teammates.

and what better candidate for cracking these than Kunimi.

He’s a very chill partner to have tag along with you on your endeavours.

Not without some grumbling and groaning on his part though, lazy bitch.

You always finish shopping trips with a busted lung at how much you have been laughing though with some of the SHADY ASS REMARKS HE MAKES ABOUT THE OTHER TEAM MATES.

You were outside the store when you both spotted an angry looking Doberman tied to a nearby post.

“Smh who let Kyotani outside again.”

You hadn’t even set foot in the store yet and he was already spitting flaming insults.

[Walking up to the automatic double doors]

“Damn Oikawa move out of my way.”

Oikawa just tryna live and he keeps getting roasted for his flat cheeks 

#StopOikawaAssShaming

Ten minutes of scouring the store later he picks up a spikey Kiwano and compares it to Iwaizumi’s hair.

Proceeds to beg you not to tell my boy Iwa because he KNOWS he will get decked to the gym floor.

Passers by often wonder why you’re wheezing and producing noises like a boiling kettle.

When I tell you no one is safe, I mean N O O N E.

“These Yule logs really out here looking like Matsukawa’s brows.”

The finisher was when Kunimi picked up a turnip and said 

“Huh, kinda looks like Kindaichi.”

I just-

He could roast a whole chicken in minutes from the burn of these comments I stg.

You can now never look at the Seijou team without various foods or inanimate objects plaguing your thoughts.

Thanks, Kunimi.

[unsenttextsuggestion]

happy new year (pt one)

hi everybody!!! you all are such important and lovable people. you need to know that. below are some personal messages for those of you who send in submissions relatively regularly and recently. (sorry if i missed u aaaaa,,,)

happy new year!!!!! i wish all of you the very best

~allie~: gl with your personal growth! you've got this covered, a bad day does not mean a bad life anxiety: gl with asking out your crush aaaaa ash: you're planning to get clean, right? that'll be difficult but you can do it!! i believe in you :) U︿U: you are a better person than you think you are, i'm sure of it babey: hi honey, things will get better and you'll find the people you are meant to be around, you'll find what makes you feel whole and will ease your pain babydoll: i'm so proud of you for moving on from your ex :) it can be difficult and i'm so glad you're growing through it !! bb: hi bb, take care of yourself for me, okay? a relapse is not the end of things, you can still grow. you'll be alright in the end beacumber: hopefully this year you'll find the people who can treat you right! comet: i'm Living for your optimism for the new year! i wish you the fulfillment of your hopes and the vanishing of your troubles common: hi bb, things are going to improve this year. bad things will ease up, and good things will spring up everywhere. make sure you don't miss them all! crow: there's so much potential for good in your future, you just have to keep looking out for it. there are still things to live for, even when you don't think there are cryptid: hi bb, haven't seen you in a while, i hope you're doing alright,, some of your last messages were a little worrying, please send in smth (anything) if you see this dna: be careful with yourself, you are not the trash you may believe you are ewe: hi honey please send in a message if you see this, your last message really worried me and i hope with all my being that you're still alive evt8 (i currently don't remember what we changed your name to sorry aa): i hope everything is going well for u and your living situation! hope ur friends are treating you well feather: i'm glad you have someone in your life that you truly love and who truly loves you, i'm glad you have that support feral: gums: i wish you all the best in moving on from the jerks in your life :0 ink: you're such a sweetie aa,, try to give yourself as much care as you give other people (i.s.): gl with your friends!! but if someone stands you up a bunch of times, maybe it's time to leave them be Jay: gl at your new school next year--i'm sure it'll be a change for great things! jaybird: find and keep those people you can confide everything in, love them as much as they need to be loved (but remember that you can't love away pain) jsm: be careful with your heart, keep it safe and keep yourself safe too Kate: you're so sweet,, just make sure to love yourself as much as you love others, okay? kjl: i wish you all the luck in finding the people who can truly and fully love you and treat you right! just make sure you're good to them too larkspur: i'm so sorry for all the bad you've been through, but good things may be on their way. bad past events do not necessitate a poor future for you, and you can grow through all of them little bird: you can grow on your own. support is wonderful but sometimes you have to let people go and grow on your own ln: just keep in mind that platonic love and romantic love are equally wonderful! keep loving and be loved in return :) lovebyrd: aaa i hope your medications are treating you well by now, i hope that your pain is easing up Lover: i'm so so glad that you're still alive, still here to be happy. try to take care of yourself and keep yourself safe, okay? Lyra: i hope that your troubles ease up this year, that people (including you) treat you better, and that you grow magnificently! mango: there are lots of things to live for, so many lovely things and people and places. you can live for yourself too, for the goodness that is your human life mime: loneliness sucks, but it's not the end of the world. this year, you'll find some of the people you are meant to find and the loneliness may ease up a little

[miriossunshine]

Hello hello! I'm here to request a regular matchup? I am a 16 y/o, 5'7, Leo, ENFP gal, that is a RAGING BISEXUAL, and a simp™- I have super short pink hair cause gotta mark those insecurities with hair dye- When people normally meet me I come of a b i t aggressive or "feral", but according to people I have known a while, after they get to know me I become loyal as hell. People say I'm brutally honest, but when I'm encountering a new person I will lie up a storm to try and get a laugh. 1/2 sorry!

continued: 2/2! I have a tendency to say sorry for every tiny microscopic thing I do before getting angry again. I like to do art but I will admit I am total shit at it, now, I am quite good at baking, gardening, and fashion design, and after I was reintroduced to anime, it got me into cosplay! In my freshman year, I took mechanics and welding and have been ever since, and I have to say I extremely like it! That's all for now, and I'm sorry for the bother! Have a wonderful day/night!

hi, dear! omg you’re perfectly fine, you’re not a bother at all!! thank you for requesting! have a great day! (о´∀`о)💜

i ship you with eijirou kirishima!

YAAAAALLLL would be so cute my heart hurts 💘💘💘💘

youre simps for each other, period!! kiri is so in love with you and he’s gonna let you and everyone else know it!!!! he’s just so proud to be your bf omg ><

omg you guys would dye ur hair together when kiri’s roots need a touch up or you wanna try a new color \(//∇//)\

he’s a sweetie and so friendly!! ur aggression aint gonna scare him away!!! >:3

kiri literally doubles over laughing at your jokes omg he lOVES ur sense of humor!!!! ><

he also appreciates your honesty a lot, and knows that whenever he wants a genuine opinion on something he can go to you because he knows you won’t sugarcoat anything!! c:

he’s the sweetest boy omg when you apologize for something small he goes “awww there’s nothing to be sorry for, silly!” and pats/kisses ur head (*´꒳`*)

KIRI THINKS UR THE COOLEST!!!! your personality is so awesome and all your hobbies make you even more interesting! he goes to you when he needs mechanical adjustments to his hero gear, and watches with amazement the whole time you’re working! ( ＾∀＾)

he’s the best helper while you bake and garden! kiri buys new flower seeds for you and is more than happy to help you plant them! he’s also a p great sous-chef and does all the mixing by hand in efforts to impress you with his strength (￣∇￣)

[kadywicker]

Would you like to talk about your ocs? 👀

OH BOY........ okay I can't give FULL details bc they're cringey but two ppl know the full story here sjdhsjsjs ANYWAY. my faves.

belial is the son of satan, who created him as a sort of test run for the antichrist (this is gomens adjacent and he then realized w the ~failure of belial that maybe the thing was making him human! so then had adam w lilith. anyway. it sort of strayed far from gomens so u can just replace adam w the generic antichrist and the point remains). belial is like 2000 years old but ~20 ish in human terms. YES we stole a demon name for him no I don't care to know anything about actual belial. we just call him eli and he's a Good Boy. I mean obviously a lil evil he was raised by satan (sort of. satan is not a responsible father. the responsibility was given to others who are distinctly Not Him). but he's sweet! he's got Complexes bc he never lived up to expectations, had no loving influence in his life (except one but like I said this is cringe we aren't getting into it all). on the outside he's an arrogant brat of a boy but like once u get to kno him he's a sweetheart. he wants nothing more than to be Loved and Seen. which is where dilly comes in but I'm getting there. his fc is c//ody f//ern which is hilariously accidental and nothing to do w him playing the antichrist but also it's super funny and gives good material for inspo. there's also a human au to this that we honestly talk abt more than this currently in which satans satan-ness is instead running a crime empire and being a dick so eli's just a spoiled rich boy w a lot of trauma who tries to ammend for his father's shittiness when his father's imprisoned. yes we made a human au out of literal lucifer no don't question it.

THEN THERES DILLY played by r//ami m//alek and he's a sweetie also. his fc has changed a couple times but we settled on rami recently. ANYWHOMST. dilly does actually appear in the fic this is all sort of based around here (chapter 5!). we have an ever expanding group of aus so it Depends on which one ur talking abt. in the fic verse he's an angel named diligence that everyone calls dilly. hes one of the leaders of the virtues (which yes we know are just a class of angel but listen it's more fun to name them after the actual heavenly virtues). he ends up w belial eventually. hes got some commitment issues and reservations abt things but he loves belial a Whole Lot. the alternative to this is since this fic is a reverse au the "regular" version of him would be a demon (named laziness see it's the opposite of diligence) who's part of the Minor Sins (so not the 7 deadly sins). p much the same bc heaven and hell Are The Same in gomens but w the caveat that since he works under belial he sort of thinks he's a huge asshole for a while until he gets to know him and he's like oh shit I Love Him. in the human au we went w that version and he works for lucifer (ish) and helps belial manage things and turn it around post lucifer going to jail. in this verse he was orphaned pretty young by Terrible Parents but got adopted by a rlly nice lesbian couple who have a daughter (they're trans lesbians that run a tattoo shop and I do love them they're great).

then there's bilhah!! I love them they're baby. uuuh they're an azcrow kid lmao yes I know that's cringey. NO there's not any mpreg. it's god fucking around for the laughs. anyway. she goes by she/they and she's a good kid. not as much to say abt her bc we haven't talked abt her much. no fc! but they have big ass curls that are white/silver and is just an all around angel. mischievous little shit that gives her parents migraines but she can do No Wrong in aziraphales eyes (or demon aziraphale who we usually talk abt here, asmodeus).

ANYWAY im so sorry for the rambling lmao but they're good kids!!! I'm always nervous talking abt ocs that exist within a fandom but like. I think they're neat! me and the bf have been constructing an intricate universe based off this fic going feral w each other so that's why there's so many different branches here ajshsjjsjs