#got a covid vaccine yesterday and woke up feeling like i was hit by a truck

[calif0rnia-lovers]

four letters.

a/n: 1/10 of stories I was initially hesitant to post. not glorifying adultery, just an idea i got from this song.

part: 1/3

pairing: miguel galindo x elena

warnings: themes of adultery. not really smut in this part, it's literally a paragraph?

summary: they met when Miguel's family would visit during the summer. each summer vacation was a mixture of stolen glances and moments. time has passed, and summers are no longer theirs. every time he leaves Mexico, he leaves her with a promise. one day he'll be hers--and only hers. years in and Elena must decide if what she feels for Miguel is love, or something else.

words: 1.9k

Diamonds.

Universally, they represent love. A promise of commitment. A priceless gift you give the woman who has your heart. A gift with the power to project the facade of happiness. A gift with the power to distract even the most intelligent woman from her man’s past mistakes.

And for that reason, diamonds are Miguel’s favorite gift to give.

Each call to his jeweler inspires a substantial chunk of change and a customized gift. The said gift is invariably dressed in a black velvet box, sealed with a golden ribbon. Delivered to an office in Sinaloa on the same day, always two months apart.

Always accompanied with a neatly penned note. A date, time, and location. Short and to the point, signed M.

It arrives two days before him. The need to reschedule, or the mention of a conflict in scheduling, never allowed.

Each delivery carries the same false promise.

One day, my love.

This time, his promise comes in emerald green.

Pressed and shaped into glimmering flowers to accent the black dress she wears. Although the dress itself is a beautiful work of art, fitting as though it was designed just for her, no one is focused on Elena’s dress.

Their focus is on the dollar sign hanging from her neck. It’s impossible to miss. Only so many people, in Sinaloa, could afford such a beautiful piece. With her long dark locks pinned, to rest at the top of her head, Miguel’s necklace is on full display. Paired with her beauty, it is distracting. So distracting, no one notices the matching hairpins.

"You look beautiful as always."

Her heart flutters. A soft smile brightens Elena's face as a familiar warmth trickles down her spine.

A soft kiss ghosts the curve of her shoulder, Miguel's smile coming to rest against her cheek.

“I see my gift suits you well.” His touch lingers against the curve of her neck, pausing to trace the petal of an emerald flower. The smile on his lips is one of admiration, his playful eyes briefly lifting to meet hers. “It seems you’ve attracted the attention of the entire restaurant.”

“Don’t sound too surprised, Mr. Galindo.” Elena’s eyes roll, the grin on her lips causing his to grow. “You’re acting as if this is something new. People always stare at me.”

“Trust me, I know. It's not something I particularly enjoy."

“Too bad,” Elena smiles, lifting her glass of wine to her lips. “I like it when people stare at me, and you are late. You’re lucky I didn’t leave with someone else.”

“Nicholas…” Miguel reads from the baby pink card.

The question in his tone is barely audible, bogged down by something Elena has never heard--at least not from Miguel. It is hard for her to pinpoint. But as she pushes her heels aside, she’s almost certain it is jealousy.

She rounds the corner to find Miguel standing in the center of her kitchen. He has stripped himself of his jacket the white fabric draped carelessly across the back of a nearby stool. His back remains to her as she crosses the room. He does not turn to acknowledge her, even after she drops her purse to the countertop before him.

His focus is no longer on the message.

Ellie. Congratulations on the promotion. We should celebrate. Until then--enjoy your favorites. x Nicholas.

His attention has shifted to the vase of lilies and peonies. A mixture of pinks, white, and corals. A fresh take from the white roses Miguel typically sends.

"These are your favorites?" His thumb gently rubs the petal of a lily. His brow arches as he glances in her direction. "How come you never said anything?"

Elena's eyes lift from the hairpins resting in her palm. Shaking her curls loose, she lets off a tiny shrug.

"The roses are always very beautiful, Miguel." Standing on her toes, she places a kiss against his cheek. "I really appreciate them. You know that."

The words of reassurance are not enough to divert his attention. The soft kiss she leaves against his cheek earns her a glance.

“I didn’t realize you were...seeing anyone.”

“You mean, aside from the man who only comes to see me when his schedule allows?” The slight roll of her eyes tightens Miguel’s jaw. “Because that would be ridiculous.”

She ignores his expression, reaching around him to retrieve the card. She returns it to its original resting place.

“It’s not ridiculous,” Miguel states this as if it is a fact. “Not when you spent the last hour talking about us over dinner--.”

She can’t stop it. The laugh she releases silences Miguel. It is not a sound typically directed at him. It is a sound that makes his skin crawl, eats at him deep inside. Sparks the need to prove himself. It's a feeling he's hated his entire life.

“I’m sorry,” Elena clears her throat, the smile remaining on her lips as he focuses his scowl in the direction of the lilies. “It’s just. I thought we didn’t do that.”

Miguel chooses not to respond. Instead, he focuses on undoing his cuffs. He knows she’s right.

They don’t do that--share personal details about their lives. Or probe for them. In fact, at this point, they’re typically already undressed--the idea of talking about their lives the last thing on their minds.

Elena watches Miguel’s gaze return to the bouquet. They study the flowers before passing over the darkened living room. Searching for other intrusions, signs of another man, that were not here during his last appearance.

“Come on, Mikey,” she sings softly. The warmth of her palms brings his gaze to hers. “Did you come all the way here just to ruin my weekend?”

The corner of his lips turns up. His gaze drops, following the path of Elena’s touch. It drifts down the chest of his shirt pausing to undo the buttons.

“Because I thought you came because you missed me. Isn't that what you said on the phone?” Her lips press against the curve of his jaw, her smile growing as his lips instinctively move to meet hers. She giggles, turning to grind back against him. “So, show me how much you missed me.”

His response is immediate, his hands pressing into the curves of her hips. The weight of his chest pressing her body forward and towards the closest stable surface. With her heels abandoned, her weight shifts to her toes. She stumbles forward in a clumsy attempt at maintaining her balance. She gasps as the chill of the marble countertop presses against the heat of her cheek. A perfect contrast to the hot and heavy hands pushing up the skirt of her dress. Their first exchange is always the same. Quick and messy. Both focused solely on satisfying the need that has built up in their time apart. The note is fresh in his mind and fuels his movements. Bruise his fingers into her hips, leaves her breathless as he sets a pace that nearly splits her open.

Elena can feel the warmth of her cheeks slowly creeping throughout her body as she concentrates on the task at hand.

"What?"

Instead of lifting her gaze, to meet the ones watching her every move, she tries for a second time to tug down the zipper of her dress.

Miguel doesn't speak. Instead, he motions for her to turn around.

The silence, which falls over the darkened kitchen, is a part of the routine. One that lasts long enough for their pulses to taper off. For their highs to drift away, opening their minds to reality.

Elena focuses on the glow of moonlight on the marble before her.

She breaks the silence, her words soft as she tries to press out any sign of hopefulness in her voice. Sounding eager about any aspect of their arrangement has never turned out good.

"Are you leaving tonight?"

The room is quiet, Miguel's fingers pausing for the briefest of seconds. He shifts forward, ducking down to allow his lips to press a soft kiss between her shoulder blades.

"Not tonight." A soft smile finds his lips as she glances over her shoulder at him. "It's your birthday tomorrow. I wouldn't miss it."

She can't suppress the smile that spreads across her face as his lips press against her cheek. His eyes drop to the watch on his wrist as she turns to face him.

“Looks like we got two hours before it's officially Saturday," he chuckles as her arms wrap around his neck.

"Is it too early to start with my birthday demands?"

His response is a soft kiss, his hand drifting to the nape of her neck. It's a kiss that melts her body into his, knotting his fingers in the softness of her hair. By the time he’s pulled away, her pulse is unsteady. His lips brush against her forehead, his touch lingering against her skin before he takes a step back.

"I'll start the bath." He grins, his eyes drifting towards the wine across the room. “Get a bottle or two, and join me.”

“I’ll be up in a minute.”

Her eyes close as his lips press against her forehead. They remain closed as she listens to his footsteps track through the quiet house. They soon fade out as he reaches the top of the steps, and Elena allows her eyes to open.

Her breath catches, her teeth tugging at her lip as her fingers gently brush against her neck. She finds herself standing before the mirror at the base of her steps. Her eyes pass over her reflection, lingering on her disheveled curls, the flush of her cheeks, her swollen lips, the hazy green glow from the moonlit flowers against her skin.

Her fingers comb through her hair, gathering the locks and pushing them over her shoulder. Unlatching the clasp, she carefully places the necklace on the countertop. She leaves it alongside the emerald hairpins. The breath she takes is deep. Her lungs hold the air until they begin to burn. With the weight of her necklace gone her shoulders fall, feeling weightless, as she exhales.

The excitement of his admission bubbles in her stomach, her hands clasping together as she forces herself to take a second breath. This time, as she excels, the excitement slowly deflates.

Getting your hopes up is foolish, Ellie.

Elena turns and crosses the dark kitchen in search of wine.

She retrieves two wine glasses from the cabinet. She pauses, elbows resting against the countertop, as she studies the bottles of wine on display against the cream backsplash. Her fingers stop short of her bottle of choice as a faint jingle fills the quiet room.

Abandoning the task at hand, Elena naturally retrieves her purse. The rose gold iPhone she finds inside is silent, screen pitch black. The ringing is louder now. Her head turns, her brow furrowing, as she looks towards the white jacket draped across the back of the stool to her right.

There is a brief moment of hesitation. A voice of warning--telling her "leave it"--in the back of Elena's mind as she reaches for the jacket.

A silence falls over the room--a blessing in disguise. It is her out. The reminder for Elena to adhere to the promise she made herself the moment she met Miguel Galindo.

Never snoop--never bite off more than you can chew.

What is the saying about curiosity?

With the touch of her finger, the screen illuminates. It reveals a missed call from Emily Galindo. It is not the name that gives Elena pause, but the photo behind the notification. A photo Elena has never seen or anticipated. A photo that breaks the fantasy Elena has spent the evening willingly participating in.

The fantasy typically lasts a few more hours. The one where they both pretend Miguel doesn’t have another life he has built outside of her. A life Miguel's never provided insight into. A life Elena has never asked--nor searched--for details on.

Maybe if she had, she wouldn’t have been blindsided by what all his life across the border entails.

The round brown eyes staring back at her own are innocent. Accompanied by a head of dark curls and soft cheeks. The blue top the infant wears matches Miguel’s jacket.

Miguel wears a smile--a distinct smile. The smile wore by every proud father.

One day, my love. I just need time.

The soft plea echos through her mind. It is the same he has whispered each departure when she has asked him to stay--even if just for an hour longer.

Time.

It’s all he’s ever needed. And all she has given.

The arrival of a message paints Elena’s kitchen in a blue glow--breaking her haze of confusion surrounding this new revelation.

Hope you made it safely. Call me when you’re settled. Love you.

Elena's stomach tightens as she rereads the message.

She jumps, her body scrambling to catch the phone as it nearly slips through her fingers. Miguel’s voice drifts down the stairs.

“Need help picking the wine?”

“No--it’s okay. I'm coming.” Elena shakes her head, returning the phone to its original place. She replaces the phone with two wine glasses, mindlessly grabbing the closest bottle.

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[magpiing]

it doesnt feel like yesterday happened but stardew says im on fall 18 now so i guess it did

[soyalexnajera]

After 2 and a half years of not getting covid I got the damn virus noooo

I woke up on Friday with a lot of fatigue like how I felt when I got my first dose of the vaccine, I think I had fever but my temperature was normal(?, I was struggling to move in my own house (mostly because of the muscle fatigue)

That's when the thought of having covid hit me like a train, why am I feeling like this?

For real I didn't leave my bed most of the day

Yesterday I felt a little bit better but I still had some fatigue but not as severe as how I felt on Friday

I've been coughing today a lot but I don't have fatigue anymore, so I'm actually feeling better today than 2 days ago

I wanted to tell you guys how shit I was feeling on Friday but I didn't had the energy to do anything

I hope I can recover soon :'0, I love you guys

-Alex 💕🤒😷🤧

[whumpmatsus]

Yesterday I took the second coronal vaccine, totally fine until I woke up at 3:30 am feeling like shit, no one was home and I didn't know how to take care of myself so I just took a fever' medicine and tried to go back to sleep, was cring while calling mommy.

my fever dropped down yet I still feel the pain killing me and I have to go to school.

Now I want one of the brothers to feel my pain 🙂

awwww I'm sorry you went through that, hun! my second vaccine I was similar, feeling fine until I woke up in the middle of the night all nauseous and congested, thankfully I'd taken off of work for a couple days in advance in case I got side effects

I was almost normal by the end of the day though, it sucks you were still feeling bad and had stuff to do! this got sent like two weeks ago so I certainly hope you're feeling better now and you weren't miserable too long <3

... I decided on Osomatsu bc I've been feeling them Oso girl vibes lately, plus he's sooooo much a mama's boy it seemed to fit haha

I also decided to use side effects for the flu shot instead of the COVID vaccine, just because I'm uncomfy using current events in my fictional writings, but the gist is still the same

I may have taken a few liberties with the side effect symptoms, but hey, it's different for everyone, right? it's also funny that all the brothers got hit by one symptom worst, but poor Oso got hit by all of them XD

there's some Allmatsu slipped in here, but also Matsuyo babying her oldest boy a bit!

hopefully you enjoy your Oso suffering, I loved writing it!!! =)

-

Being alone in the house for once, it’s a miracle that Osomatsu was able to sleep at all.

When he wakes up, the clock blinking at him that it’s sometime around 3 in the morning, he almost forgets that he’s by himself, until he feels that the rest of the futon is empty. Everything trickles back pretty quickly ― why none of his brothers are around tonight.

Choromatsu is at an idol convention that’s pretty far out of town. Karamatsu is staying at a local hotel for a few days’ worth of music performances. Jyushimatsu is away for a week visiting Homura at her parents’ house in the country. Totty’s having a grown-up sleepover at a friend’s place. And Ichimatsu volunteered for an overnight shift at the animal shelter because one of the cats he’s been looking after wound up there.

For the record, there’s very little Osomatsu hates more than being all by himself in the futon. Even though it gives him a chance to spread out and sleep however he likes, it makes him feel lonely. He’d rather be huddled up with everyone than have all this empty space.

To make things worse, when he wakes up alone, he wakes up feeling like shit.He remembers not really drinking that much last night, so it can’t be a hangover… but… he did just get his yearly flu vaccine yesterday afternoon. The pharmacy tech who gave him the shot warned him that he might feel a little bad the next day or so, like he has a weak version of the flu. Annnnd… he’s pretty sure there was a sheet that was given to him that explained benefits, possible side effects, and a list of things that he should go to the doctor if he experienced.

Although he can’t remember where he put that paper, he’s sure that’s why he’s feeling so crappy right now.

The area of his arm where he got injected is stiff, and trying to move it makes him want to cry. There are aches creeping out into the rest of his body, including his head pounding. His stomach is swirling with nausea as soon as he sits up, and for a brief moment he’s convinced he’s going to be sick.

After he puts a hand against his forehead to try and will it to quit hurting, his palm comes back damp with sweat. Shit… do I have a fever? That’s no good either; fevers always make him feel vaguely panicky and uncomfortable in the most horribly nonspecific way.

“Mmm… Mom…?” he calls, but his voice comes out sounding hoarse and raspy. It hurts to talk, so he doesn’t think he can raise his voice more than this. “… Mom?”

Usually if one of the sextuplets calls for their mom, Matsuyo hears them and is in their bedroom only a moment later. At the very least, she calls back that she’s coming. Instead, the house is completely silent. It’s borderline eerie, especially to Osomatsu’s foggy mind.

Then it hits him; their parents are away, too. They went on vacation for a few days, just a short trip to rekindle their romance. So… he really is all by himself right now.

To try and keep himself calm, he does his best to breathe, except as soon as he starts to focus on it, he realizes his nose is plugged. Ughhh. He sniffles for a minute, seeing if he can get a good breath in. It’s kind of hopeless.

Okay, okay… breathe through your mouth then, dumbass. Don’t get all worked up. Just… fuck. Think about what you’d do if one of your brothers woke you up feeling like shit. How would you take care of them?

… It’s hard. Even though he could take care of someone else, it’s infinitely more difficult when he’s the one trying to take care of himself. His brain is all clouded and despite the fact that he knows it’s not serious, he’s probably not actually sick, he feels so terrible it’s making every idea a struggle.

He can’t call any of his brothers. They’re all out enjoying their own things… what kind of awful person would spoil his little brothers’ good times like that?

With that being said, he’s not really sure how to take care of himself. The only other options available are to go back to sleep, which he’s certain he can’t do at the moment, or… call his mom.

Although he hates to interrupt his parents’ vacation like this, he’s got his phone and is dialing Matsuyo’s number before he knows it. He won’t keep her awake for too long, just long enough to get some advice on what to do. She’s the only one he’s really okay with seeing or hearing him be really vulnerable, because even though he’s the oldest of her children… she’s still his mother.

Still, he can’t help but feel just a little guilty when her tired voice comes crackling through the phone. “Osomatsu?”

His arm is sore, so he puts the phone on speaker and sets it down on his lap. “Hi, Mom. Sorry I woke you up.”

“No, no, don’t worry. It’s okay.” She must hear the fatigue and congestion in his voice, because it sounds like she immediately perks up. “Is everything alright?”

The way her voice is already laced with concern makes his throat tighten. He woke her up in the middle of the night, when she was trying to sleep, on vacation, and she doesn’t even sound mad. He blinks away hot tears that have welled up fast, and they have nowhere to go except to drip down his cheeks. “I don’t feel good,” he croaks, reaching up to rub at his eyes.

Damn. What kind of stupid baby am I, crying over this…?

If it’s at all possible, Matsuyo’s voice softens even more. “Ah, honey. Are you sick? Do you need Dad and I to come home?”

“N-no!” His response is instant and visceral, though it probably sounds pathetic because he’s starting to cry. “I… I don’t think it’s… that bad. I just… I woke up and I… I’m all… my arm hurts, and I’ve got a really bad headache, I’m sweating and shivering at the s-same time, my stomach hurts…”

“Oh, dear.” She clicks her tongue. “… Hm. You and your brothers got your flu shots yesterday, didn’t you?”

“Yeah.”

“That’s probably why you’re not feeling well. Are you having any trouble breathing?”

“I-I mean… only ‘cause my nose is stuffy. I can still breathe through my mouth and it’s not… like… I can breathe.”

“Are you dizzy or weak?”

He has to pause for a second to figure how to answer that. “N-no… not really. Just kind of… achy.”

“Are you running a temperature?”

“I… I dunno. I think, maybe.”

“Okay, well, if you think you are, you should probably go check it to make sure it’s not too high. Do you want me to stay on with you while you do that?”

“Y-yeah… I guess. I just…” It takes all his strength to get to his feet, and his headache is still pounding away once he does. At least his sinuses clear up a bit when he’s standing. “I know I take care of my brothers all the time… but… I-I don’t… I don’t really know how to take care of myself when I don’t feel good…”

Matsuyo sighs softly. “Oh, Osomatsu, sweetie. That’s normal. It’s harder to take care of yourself than it is to take care of someone else; sometimes you don’t think right when you aren’t feeling well. Go take your temperature, and we’ll go from there, alright?”

“Okay…”

Getting to the bathroom is kind of a battle. Every part of his body just feels so heavy, and he keeps wanting to fall asleep right against the wall. By the time he gets into the bathroom and turns the light on, he’s drained from the walk.

Trying to open the medicine cabinet, he gets a glimpse of himself in the mirror and has to cringe. He just looks shitty ― pale and sweaty, his face flushed like it’s been barely kissed by the fever, eyelids drooping with exhaustion. He looks like some kind of hilarious caricature of a sick person on a Saturday morning cartoon.

Everything rattles in the cabinet for a moment before he finds the thermometer, and gives it a brief rinse before sticking it in his mouth.

He continues to make small noises of discomfort the whole time, and Matsuyo continues to offer gentle coos of encouragement. Finally the damn thing beeps, prompting him to pull it out.

“Osomatsu? What does it say, honey?”

“Mmh, it’s, uh…” The bleariness from being so tired forces him to squint at the screen. “37.8.”

When his mother speaks, she sounds relieved, which makes him feel a little better. “Oh, that’s not too bad. Anything under 38 is low-grade, which combined with everything else means you’re probably just feeling some side effects from the shot. The fever is what’s making you feel bad more than anything, I’d guess.”

He tears off a square of toilet paper to wipe away the leftover tears, still incredulous over the fact that something so simple and dumb made him cry. “So… what do I do? I mean… can I take anything?”

“Of course. If you can manage it, have a few crackers and take two paracetamol, alright? That should keep the fever from making you too uncomfortable.”

“… Ugh.” The thought of food right now isn’t really what he wants to hear. “Do I… have to eat anything?”

“Aaah, I know your tummy is a little upset, but… taking painkillers on an empty stomach isn’t a good idea, sweetheart. It might not get absorbed correctly, and it might make you more nauseous.”

Well… he supposes when she puts it that way, he should just suck it up and have a couple crackers, then. “Okay. Should I do anything else, or…?”

She hums in thought. “I can’t think of much else that would help. Taking the medicine and trying to go back to sleep is your best bet. You can put the hot water bottle on your tummy, if you want. Just make sure it’s not too hot. And you can put a cold cloth on your forehead if you feel warm. Rest will help you more than anything, I think.”

“Okay… I guess you’re right. I just don’t feel good, Mom.” He knows he’s said that several times already, and it sounds so babyish,but he can’t really think of how else to express it.

“Oh, honey, I know. Do you want me to stay up with you for a little bit? I don’t know if a lullaby will work over the phone, but, I can give it a try.”

He shakes his head even though he knows she can’t see it. “No… I’ll be okay. I’m just gonna… eat some crackers and take those pills and lie down. You should go back to sleep, too.”

She chuckles. “Don’t you dare worry about me. I’ll be back out as soon as my head hits the pillow. Are you sure?”

“Yeah… I’m gonna go try to just… take care of myself.”

“Okay, sweetheart. But you call me again if you need anything, alright?”

“Mhm, I will. Thanks for helping me.”

“Of course, my poor boy. Try to get some sleep. I love you.”

“Love you too, Mom. Night.”

Once he hangs up, the house feels too quiet again. It reminds him of those horror movies where someone wakes up in the middle of the night and starts walking around and the monster sneaks up on them without any noise and before they know it, the monster’s got them.

So begins the long trek downstairs after he puts the thermometer away and gets the paracetamol from the cabinet. Now he can’t ever tease Totty again for being afraid of the dark and monsters and all that shit, because he has to peer around the stairway to make sure something isn’t waiting for him at the bottom of the steps.

Thankfully, when he opens the fridge, he discovers a couple bottles of some off-brand sports drink; his mind dredges up a memory of Jyushimatsu telling him a while ago that those are good for sick people. That stuff keeps you hydrated and helps settle your stomach.

So he manages to get two pills swallowed, then forces a handful of senbei crackers into his mouth. Even though they don’t taste good, he’s crossing his fingers that it’ll keep him from feeling too sick from the medicine.

Even the kitchen is too lonely. He takes the rest of the bottle with him, just in case he wakes up again and needs a sip of something to be able to go back to sleep.

Being faced with the empty futon once more makes him almost burst into tears. Seeing nobody in it makes his stupid mind see everyone in it, like they all should be, squished up against each other. He can imagine Ichimatsu at the very end, pretending he’s not cuddling up to Karamatsu. And Choromatsu near the other end, being a good sport about Jyushimatsu curling up against him. And of course Totty right there next to Osomatsu, snuggling against his oldest brother for warmth on a chilly fall night.

He lowers himself down into the futon, but doesn’t actually go horizontal. The phone trembles in his hand, and he can’t stop himself.

-

“Mmmh, Osomatsu-nii-san?”

“Hey, Totty. U-uh… sorry… I probably woke you up, huh?”

“It’s okay. Actually, I’m… I’m kind of glad somebody called. I don’t wanna embarrass myself by waking up my friends, but… i-it’s kind of dark and I have to pee… I know you can’t actually come over, but just talking to you would be enough. Could you maybe… stay on while I go?”

“Oh… yeah, sure. I’ve got nothing better to do than listen to you take a piss in the middle of the night.”

“Oh, haha, so funny. I’ll be fast. Hey… is everything okay? You sound all stuffy.”

“Yeah, I’m good. Just… flu shot side effects making me feel crummy. Everyone else got theirs yesterday too, so I just… thought I’d check on you guys since I woke up feeling like shit.”

“Huh. Well, I feel okay. My arm’s a little sore, but beyond that I’m good.”

“Good.”

“Aaaah, okay, I’m done now. Can you stay on while I walk back to the other room?”

“Yeah, no worries. I hope you can get back to sleep pretty fast.”

“Ugh, me too. It was hard to go back to sleep with my arm hurting and being too scared to go pee. Thanks for checking on me.”

“Hey, what else are big brothers for?”

“Mmh, thanks anyway, though. Goodnight, Osomatsu-nii-san.”

“Night, Totty. Sweet dreams.”

-

“Aaaah, Osomatsu… yaaaawn… is everything alright, dear brother?”

“Oh, uh, yeah. Yeah, everything’s fine, Kara. I just… miss you guys, since it’s just me in the house. I woke up and… forgot I was all by myself, pfft.”

“Hmph. I suppose I understand that. In my case, I do not believe I’m sleeping as well as I might with the rest of you. So at least it isn’t just you feeling that way.”

“Yeah… ha, that makes me feel a little better. Uh, how are your gigs going so far?”

“Oh? Are you interested? Well, surprise of surprises, the crowd gave me a standing ovation tonight!”

“Yeah, really? Damn, look at you. Better not have flirted with any pretty girls without me.”

“Ah, I wouldn’t dream of it, brother. Are you doing alright otherwise? You sound a bit off.”

“Mh, no big deal. Just the flu shot making me feel like shit. You’re not feeling too bad?”

“I believe I had a low fever earlier, but by the time I came back to my room, it had broken. You have my thanks for checking on me, however. And I sincerely hope you feel better soon.”

“Thanks, Kara. Hey, I’ll let you get back to sleep now; you need rest for your next gig tomorrow.”

“Haha! Why, I wouldn’t say you’re wrong. Goodnight, brother.”

“Night, Kara. Sleep tight.”

-

“Hey, shitty eldest. Are you really still awake?”

“Ouch, what a greeting. Right through my heart, Ichimacchan. Nah, I was sleeping, but I woke up. I was trying to get back to sleep… it’s just kind of… y’know, lonely over here.”

“Oh. Yeah, you’re the only one in the house, huh?”

“Yeahhh, it sucks. I just woke up and I was like, ‘shit, where are all my baby brothers?’ Pff.”

“Yeah, I get it. I’d come home if I could, but I’ve gotta take care of Fern right now.”

“No, no, it’s all good. How’s she doing?”

“Better than the last time I saw her. At least she’s eating now. She keeps hissing at anyone who gets close except for me.”

“Pffff… guess she’s copying you.”

“Tch, go die, Osomatsu. Actually, it sounds like you’re pretty close to it right now. You good?”

“Oh, yeah. I’m good. The fucking flu shot, you know?”

“Ouch, don’t even mention that. My head was about to split in half earlier.”

“Shit. You doing better now?”

“Yeah, it finally went away. Hopefully you feel better soon, too. Listen, I gotta go now ― Fern’s scratching at me for a little more food.”

“Oh, right, no problem. Go take care of her. And, uh, take some sleep if you can get it so you don’t pass out tomorrow.”

“I’ll do my best. If not, I’m napping on top of you tomorrow. Night, Osomatsu.”

“Count on it! See you tomorrow, Ichimacchan.”

-

“Heyyyyy, Osomatsu-nii-san!! You woke me up and the phone ringing almost woke up Homura-chan. Is everything okay???”

“Oh… oh, yeah, sorry, Jyushi. Everything’s fine. I didn’t mean to wake you up and almost wake her. I just wanted to call and… see how you were doing.”

“… Hah??”

“I’m all alone in the house… I guess I miss all my little brothers. Choro has some nerd shit going on, Kara’s doing gigs, Totty’s at a friend’s place, and Ichi’s at the animal shelter with one of his cats… and you’re all the way out in the country. Plus Mom and Dad went on vacation. So…”

“Oh. So you’re just lonely ‘cause you’re alone. And you woke up and felt bad so you called me?”

“Yeah… I’m calling the others too. Just… just, you know, checking up on everybody. Sorry, I didn’t think about that you’re probably sleeping in the same bed as Homura-chan…”

“It’s okay! Maybe if she wakes up we’ll go for round two, haha.”

“Jyushi! You sly asshole, saying something like that to me, pffff. You’re bad. You’re… having fun, though, right?”

“Yeah, loads of fun. It’s great out here in the country. Homura-chan’s family even has a dog! Are you okay? You sound funny.”

“Uh? Oh, yeah. I’m just feeling a little crappy from the flu shot.”

“Ohhhh. That’s right, we all got that before I left yesterday. I’m kinda sore too, but it’s getting better. I hope it doesn’t last too much longer for you. Maybe since it woke you up now, it’ll be gone when you wake up for real!”

“Maybe. I hope so. Mannn… okay, Jyushi, I’m gonna let you get back to cuddling with Homura-chan, okay? Enjoy the rest of your visit.”

“Hahahhh, thanks, Osomatsu-nii-san. And you can call me again too, if you want! Maybe during the day next time. Nighty night.”

“Night, Jyushi. Sweet dreams.”

-

“Mmmf… Osomatsu? If you’re calling me, someone better be dead or dying.”

“Ahah, or what, Fappymatsu?”

“Or I will reach through this phone and strangle you like we’re in a B-list horror movie.”

“Ouchhhh, you’re worse than Ichimacchan; at least he didn’t threaten me. Are you really that cranky that I woke you up?”

“Yes, because I was having trouble getting to sleep and I just started drifting off when my phone rang. If you don’t give me a good reason in the next thirty seconds, Karamatsu becomes my oldest brother.”

“Geez, okay, okay. Sorry, you grump. I just wanted to check on you guys. I woke up feeling like shit thanks to the flu shot from yesterday, and I… wanted to make sure it wasn’t making you guys feel crappy too.”

“I’m fine, Osomatsu. I mean, I felt a little queasy earlier in the night, but it passed. You, on the other hand, sound like death warmed over. You should hang up and get some sleep. Can we not leave you alone for five minutes?”

“Heh. Guess not. Sorry I woke you up. You should get back to sleep too.”

“… Osomatsu. Wait. Did… did you call everyone else, too? You seriously just wanted to make sure we were okay?”

“Uh-huh. Well… well, I guess I’m a little lonely, too. I mean, I woke up and the futon was empty and I just… felt like I should check on all of you. I’m the big brother. So… I’m glad you’re alright.”

“Well… thanks, I guess. Sorry I snapped at you, but, I’m tired. Don’t worry too much, okay? I’m a little anxious, being so far from home overnight… I miss all of you too. But it’ll be fine. Try some breathing exercises… if you can do that, sometimes it helps you relax enough to fall asleep.”

“I’ll try. Thanks, Choro-chan. I’m glad you’re doing okay. You try those exercises too, yeah? I want you to get some sleep.”

“Yeah, I will. Thanks for checking on us, Osomatsu. You’re not a bad big brother sometimes. Get some rest, okay? I’ll call you tomorrow. Goodnight.”

“Night, Choro-chan. Sleep well.”

-

When Osomatsu puts his phone down, far enough away that he probably won’t roll onto it in his sleep, he feels a lot better.

Not that he doesn’t still feel crappy, but his headache is starting to fade, and the anxiety he felt about being away from his brothers has calmed down substantially. It means that hopefully he’ll be able to get back to sleep.

He lies down on one side, rubbing at his eyes to get rid of the tears that started up again. The blanket is pulled up, so tightly around him that it almost mimics being hugged. With any luck, he’ll be out in a few minutes so he doesn’t have the chance to panic at the sounds of the house settling or the noises outside or anything like that.

As he closes his eyes and does his best to breathe rhythmically through his mouth, he curls his knees up to his chest.

He still feels lonely.

Everything will be better tomorrow.

[cbk1000]

So, I had my COVID booster shot on Friday, and just thought I would put my experience out there for anyone who is curious about side effects. 

I figured it was going to hit me like my second shot (I had Moderna, and for the first shot, my only side effect was a sore arm, but the day after I had the second, I was running a mild fever, had bad chills and some body aches, and generally felt pretty shitty; this only lasted for a day, thankfully), so I decided to be proactive with Tylenol, which helped a lot when the second shot made me feel crappy. 

I got the booster around 3:30 in the afternoon on Friday; that was about the time I had my second shot. I woke up feeling fine the morning after my second shot, but around 10:00, my immune system suddenly ran me over with a truck, so I knew not to trust getting through the first several hours ok. I took some Tylenol right before bed on the night of my booster in case my immune system went, “Hol up--THIS bitch again??” in the middle of the night. I figured a dose of Tylenol would see me through most of the night, and then I could take some in the morning if necessary. I woke up with a sore arm and really nothing else (although I will note my arm was pretty painful, which is typical for me with vaccines; I couldn’t lift it all the way, and even very light pressure on the injection site hurt a little). We had to go grocery shopping, so before we left, I took some Tylenol again for my arm and to try and stave off the worst of any side effects. I did feel a bit under the weather: I had a headache and that sort of achey, hot feeling that you get in your head when you’re feverish. I did not actually have a fever, though my temperature was a bit higher than normal (I tend to run on the colder side, like around 97 degrees, and I was right at 98 yesterday). I felt a bit run down all day, but functional, and a headache that kind of came and went. I just drank some water and sat around and read and played a bit of Tomb Raider. Even when the Tylenol wore off, I didn’t feel too terrible; much better than I had with the second shot.

I took a little more Tylenol before bed, then slept almost ten hours straight through, and woke up this morning feeling pretty much back to normal, with only a mild headache (which tbh is probably due to sinus pressure); my arm feels much better as well. 

Everyone is different, of course, and I can’t guarantee that my symptoms will be your symptoms, but I highly recommend keeping Tylenol on hand and just taking it easy for the day or two after your shot. This was actually quite a bit better than I expected, and I think being proactive with Tylenol, rather than smugly assuming I was going to get away with a sore arm for both shots, is what made this a better experience than my second dose.

[emetogirl]

So fun personal emeto story that happened to me yesterday!! I am in nursing school right now and about to start working with patients (super excited for clinicals!!!) and I was able to receive the Pfizer vaccine yesterday! I feel super happy and relieved to have received my first dose and very privileged to have gotten it so early. Can’t wait to be Covid invincible! (or at least mostly lol)

DISCLAIMER: Just because I’m going to tell a story about a vaccine reaction doesn’t mean you need to be scared about getting a vaccine! I have a chronic illness so reactions like these are normal for me and nothing I need to worry about. With the Pfizer vaccine, it is common to experience side effects (especially for young ppl) and actually healthy because it means your immune system is responding to it! It’s better to spend a day feeling a little uncomfortable then risk the health of yourself, your loved ones, and your community❤️❤️❤️

So a little thing about me, I ALWAYS react to vaccines. Totally worth it getting them because it keeps me and the people around me safe and healthy, but I knew that I was probably not going to feel very good from the get go. Got my shot around 1pm, and was feeling mostly okay that day. I went to bed knowing that the side effects were probably going to hit me the next morning. At 3:30 in the morning, I woke up with the most intense wave of nausea, and was just like oh shit I’m going to puke right fucking now. The urge to throw up just kept washing over me, and I knew I needed to get sick. So I just kinda gingerly sat up in bed knowing that I had to be gentle so I didn’t immediately throw up, and slowly got off my bed and walked to the bathroom. Nausea is never fun for me necessarily, but I don’t mind puking too much. If it needs to happen, it’s gonna make me feel better afterwards, so I just wanna get it over with. I opened the lid and curled around the seat with my head propped up on my arm and waited. The nausea would start to build up and I’d lean a little more over the bowl thinking I’d get sick, but then I’d just gag or burp a little and it would back off but not go away. I could feel my stomach hitching with each gag, and I kept heaving up a little bit of stomach acid that would only burn the back of my throat (I really had not eaten enough the day before). After around 15 minutes of this I realized I was shivering, so I risked getting up and grabbing a blanket from my bed. Standing and walking made me feel a lot more queasy, so I hurried back to the bathroom. Wrapping the blanket around me, I tried to warm up while starting to really feel like I was about to be properly sick. I leaned over the bowl to spit out the saliva that was pooling in my mouth. I gagged hard right after and made a thin retching sound that made me scared I was about to wake up my roommate. I could feel the nausea rising in the back of my throat and leaned further into the bowl, knowing I was going to puke soon. After a few more heaves, I brought up a small gush of mostly stomach acid and a little bit of water. I coughed a lot after that, because it burned my throat like hell. Usually after I puke the nausea subsided immediately, but this time it took a bit. I just leaned back, closed my eyes, and tried to steady my breathing in hopes it would calm my tummy. After a few minutes of that, the churning in my stomach subsided, and I quit feeling like I needed to burp up everything I had ever eaten. I was able to splash some water on my face and go to sleep shortly after that and sleep for a few more hours before I had to get up for class. I didn’t puke anymore (probably because I didn’t wanna let myself lol) but I felt super queasy all day today. Hopefully tonight I can sleep through the night without waking up to puke, but if it happens again I’ll be sure to let you guys know ;)

[sage-nebula]

Because where I work is considered essential (and because IT in particular is considered essential, and I work in IT), I’ve already received both doses of the Covid-19 vaccine. I thought I would share my experiences with the vaccine here in case anyone wants to hear about it from a regular person on a personal blog rather than a big media outlet or other professional source.

TL;DR: Get the vaccine, please get the vaccine, it is worth it. 

Longer version:

As you may or may not know, I am a hermit, so I’m basically in my house any time when I’m not forced to be out of my house, meaning quarantine didn’t really disrupt my normal life at all. In fact, it let me work from home which I considered to be an improvement. I bring this up because it means that at no point did I ever get Covid. What this means is that when it came to the first round of the vaccine, here’s what happened:

1st Round Side-Effects: None! Aside from the standard sore arm at injection point.

My body had never seen Covid before, so it didn’t know what to expect and had no reaction at first except for, well, something along the lines of this:

Vaccine: [arrives with Covid protein] Immune System: “Oh, I don’t like that. I don’t like that you brought that in here. I’m going to make preparations so you can’t do that again.”

So then a couple weeks passed and I got the second vaccine. When I got the second vaccine, the nurse who gave me the shot pointed to a free sheet I could take that listed all the side-effects to expect, as well as a sticker (similar to an “I Voted” sticker, but this time it’s an “I Got the Covid-19 Vaccine” sticker). I took the sticker but left the informational sheet, because I didn’t have side-effects the first time and figured that I wouldn’t have any the second time.

This was a mistake.

Because you see, this time my body recognized the Covid protein, and so the response was basically:

Vaccine: [arrives with Covid protein] Immune System: “I think the fuck NOT you trick-ass bitch!! Get the FUCK out of my house this goddamn INSTANT, I am firing up the BAZOOKAS, you are NOT WELCOME HERE!!”

And as a result, I have experienced the following side-effects:

— Body Aches: General muscle pain, which I have all the time anyway, but also random stabbing pains all over my body. These were sharp enough to wake me up from sleep yesterday morning.

— Headache: Honestly I have nearly daily headaches anyway due to a car accident I had like a decade ago (apparently this kind of trauma stays with you), but it’s been more pronounced as through my entire head than normal, plus with the addition of the aforementioned spiky pains up there. 

— Nausea: The nausea also woke up at like 6am yesterday, and I took some Pepto Bismol to try to get rid of it, but it didn’t work. The nausea persisted along with the pain.

— Vomiting: I threw up once at 8am yesterday as a result of the aforementioned nausea. Thankfully I have not experienced either nausea or vomiting since. However, that may be because . . .

— Loss of Appetite: I haven’t wanted to eat anything since yesterday! I’ve tried, oh how I’ve tried. Yesterday I had half a cup of chicken noodle soup and two pieces of sourdough bread with butter on them. Today so far I’ve had half a cup of broccoli cheddar soup with two pieces of sourdough bread dipped in. I’m also now having a milkshake to try to get some calories in me. It’s been a struggle.

— Allodynia: This might be more of a “me” thing than a side-effect thing because I don’t see this listed with normal Covid-19 vaccine side-effects, BUT it happens when I get sick. Essentially, since yesterday morning my skin has been very painful to the touch. On my scalp especially, but also down my arms, legs, chest, back — you name it, it hurts when I touch it, like having a bad sunburn or millions of papercuts all over my body. Sucks, man.

— Fever + Chills: I’ve had a fever, and as a result I’ve had chills! Ever wonder what it’s like waking up under a fleece weighted blanket, drenched in sweat but also still cold? It’s not fun. Don’t recommend it. (But my solution was still to put on heavier clothes and get under the blanket to sleep some more . . . I mean I wasn’t cold the next time I woke up but I don’t know if this was the smart solution.)

— Extreme Fatigue: Speaks for itself.

Yesterday was definitely worse than today. (For reference, I got the vaccine on Thursday, yesterday was Friday, today is Saturday. So this is Day 2.) Yesterday I was operating at 10% capacity at my best. Most of the day it was like 3% - 5%. Today it’s more like 40% - 50%. Definitely much better, but I still feel sick. I don’t count it as a real illness because I don’t actually have the Covid-19 virus in my body. It’s more that there’s a protein or something specific to Covid-19 that’s in the vaccine, and my immune system recognized it and decided to launch into ass-kicking mode. Unfortunately, the way the human body’s immune system works is that it doesn’t just 1v1 the virus. Instead it’s like, you know how people joke that they’re going to burn the house down to get rid of the spider when they find a spider in the living room? That’s what the immune system does. The immune system doesn’t grab a newspaper to smash the virus, the immune system sets fire to the body to kill the virus, and that’s what a fever is. And it sucks for all involved, but ultimately it’s worth it as long as you don’t die first. (Which is always a risk, but the immune system doesn’t care about that. The immune system just wants the spider / virus gone.) 

Anyway, I write all of this out so that you can a.) know what to be prepared for and stock up accordingly, and b.) know that it’s still NOWHERE NEAR AS BAD as actually getting Covid-19. My best friend got Covid-19, and she was hospitalized and on oxygen for a week. She had cognitive issues, like memory problems, for longer. She is still sneezing up blood clots from what the oxygen did to her, among other things. And she’s one of the lucky ones. The side-effects remind me of when I got the flu back in 2018, except still not as bad because I’m getting over them much, much more quickly than I did the flu. However much these side effects suck, I’ve been managing them with the following:

— Gatorade: I’m one of those people that doesn’t like drinking water because it’s bland, so I had a Postmate bring me three big bottles of Glacier Freeze Gatorade and I’ve been chugging them. Gatorade is basically flavored sugar water so it replenishes your electrolytes and gets you hydrated. Is it as healthy as water? Due to the high sugar content, probably not. Does that matter when you’re at risk of dehydration because you’ve puked and are sweating out a fever? Nope! I’ve drank Gatorade whenever I get sick / dehydrated ever since childhood because my pediatrician recommended it to me back then. If you don’t like water, stock up on this in preparation.

— Advil: I always have Advil on hand because as I mentioned before, I get near daily headaches regardless. But Advil has helped not only with the muscle pains, but also with the fever reduction and the allodynia. These things have all come back when the Advil wears off, but it helps in the meantime. Other medicines, like Tylenol, can probably help too. 

— Sleep: I had to work yesterday (from home), but any time I wasn’t answering an email or on the phone I was dozing off. When I ended my shift at 5:30pm I slept until 2am. I woke up long enough to drink some more Gatorade, take some more Advil, and let my dog out, and then I went back to sleep until 12:30pm. I think this is why I feel so much better tbh. Sleep is very healing. If you’re an adult who works, plan to take time off after your second vaccination if you can. You will thank yourself for it.

I did these same things when I had the flu, but it still took me two weeks to get to where I am now in two days. The second vaccine hits hard because your immune system takes things from 0 to 100, but it’s still not as bad as an actual virus, and definitely not as bad as being in the hospital on oxygen or, god help you, a ventilator. (Because my next-door neighbor, who was a nurse, told me that by the time you’re on a ventilator you only have a 30% chance of surviving. So you really do not want to get to that point.)

All in all, please get the vaccine. Yes, the side-effects suck. Trust me, I know! I couldn’t even really read an email yesterday because my brain kept fuzzing out over it. I went back to sleep at 2am because my eyes hurt too much looking at anything, so lying in the dark felt better. But I’m sure that in another day or two I’ll be back up at 100%. And in two weeks I’ll be fully protected. And that is so, so much better than being in the hospital on a ventilator.

So please, please, please get the vaccine when you can. For yourself, and for those who are immunocompromised who can’t. Stock up on Gatorade and painkillers / fever reducers and get the vaccine. It’s worth it. 

[nancypullen]

Whirlwind

Gosh, it’s been a week since I posted! The last time I visited here I was in full Thanksgiving mode, cooking up a storm and waiting for Matt to arrive.  Since then we have feasted, laughed, feasted some more, put Matt on a plane back to Minneapolis, and entered the Christmas frenzy.  And it’s only December 3rd.  I feel like I have a tentative handle on things, and now I’ve cursed myself by saying that.  My Christmas to-do list is long but I’m marking things off daily.  I could really use some elves.  It’s not easy to keep the holiday spirit alive when it’s 75 degrees outside.  I’d like to at least need a sweatshirt.  I ran a few errands yesterday and actually used the a/c in the car...in December. Sure, that probably has as much to do with menopause as  it does with local weather, but it’s still ridiculous. I’m trying to be jolly for our second  *!%@#  pandemic Christmas so a few snowflakes would go a long way. Has anyone else hit a wall with this whole COVID thing? I’m so weary.  Oh, I’m still being careful.  I had the J&J vaccine last March, I received my booster on November 1st,  I still wear a mask into the grocery store, etc.   I know too many people who have lost loved ones to this awful virus, so I don’t take it lightly.  I’m just wondering if things will ever be normal again.  We haven’t been inside a movie theater or restaurant since February of 2020.  We masked up and got on airplanes, so is a move theater any different than that?  I’d have to unmask in a restaurant so that’s a bigger deal.  I want so much to be carefree again, but I also don’t want to die (or have lifelong health issues) from stupidity.  We’ve come this far, we can’t stop now.  It would be like quitting the Oregon Trail in Idaho.  We’ve got to see it through to the end.  Don’t fall out of the wagon and break your neck now.  Onward, onward. As you can see, I’m a bit out of sorts.  Between the balmy December weather, never-ending COVID, politics (don’t get me started) and self-inflicted holiday stress, I’m a bit grumpy.  I think I’ll get on the treadmill and then retreat to my desk and create something.  That always puts me back in balance.  A podcast, some paper and ink, and a nosy cat - just what the doctor ordered.  Sure, there are plenty of other things I should do,  but today I’m going to take care of ME.  That’s something that we often put at the bottom of our to-do lists, but you can’t pour from an empty pitcher, right?  Take care of yourself today.  Eat right, take a walk, do something that removes you from the madness of the world right now.  Save yourself. There are beautiful days ahead (I’m sure of it) and you want to be ready for them.  Focus on the million little joys that tilt the scale in favor of a good day.   Here’s a perfect example.  This morning I woke up and immediately began making a list in my head of things I needed to do.  I haven’t done my floors all week, I should throw some laundry in, I need to wrap gifts, take something out to thaw for dinner, plan next week’s menus, my bathroom needs a deep clean, and so on.  I wasn’t even dressed yet and I was dreading my day.  Then I walked into the kitchen and just on the other side of the window was a robin, singing his heart out.   It stopped me in my tracks and I listened to his entire performance before he flew away.

Yeah, I know - photography class should be on my to-do list.  You get the idea though.  He welcomed me to the morning and reminded me that the world may be a mess but at least I don’t have to eat worms for breakfast.  See?  Silver lining.  Happy December, boys and girls.  Find yourself some happy, take good care of yourself, and stay safe and well. XOXO, Nancy

[cowboy]

which vaccine did u get? i got the moderna yesterday and i woke up today feeling like i got hit by a truck

Moderna! I have work tomorrow so D: also I previously had covid so double D:

[nebulousneuroticism]

Yesterday was quite a day.  I slept poorly, in anticipation of the day, and ended up being awoken early by the sound of fire alarms.  It was fire inspection day, and I hauled myself out of bed and let them in when they knocked.  The fire alarms continued to blare occasionally, so there was no way I was getting back to sleep.

Around noon, I went to get my covid vaccine.  I drove about twenty minutes away to a pharmacy in a grocery store.  I filled out a form and then sat in a chair until they called my name.  They gave me the shot right there, in a chair in the grocery store.  It was a normal shot, not bad at all; and I felt very relieved and proud of myself afterward, as I often do when I accomplish simple tasks.

I went home and did some work.  I ran an interview, and then graded it.  I went out to get some food.  I noticed I was feeling tired, but it wasn’t clear whether that was caused by the vaccine or by my poor sleep.

Around nine o’ clock, I started playing some Apex Legends with my best friend, and that’s when the side effects really started kicking in.  I felt cold and started shivering, even though I had piled myself with blankets and it was warm in my apartment.  I felt pain, too, like my clothes were chafing all over my body.  But I pushed through and played until almost eleven.

Then, I crawled into bed and had a miserable, feverish night.  I took my temperature at one point--it was 101.9.  That’s a pretty high fever.  I messaged work that I would probably miss my morning meeting, and then fell asleep sometime after midnight.

I felt much better when I woke up, not long after my usual time.  The fever was gone, replaced by a general body/head ache.  I chugged some water and dozed the day away.  When I got up again the afternoon, I actually felt pretty good.

So, I felt good enough to attend Dungeons and Dragons.  I gathered my things and fought traffic to get across town.  The game was fine, but I wasn’t really on my social game.  I felt very shy.  I left right when we finished, and fought traffic (which was somehow still really bad) back the other way.

Yeah.  A very eventful couple of days.  I did not expect the vaccine to hit me as hard as it did.  The fact that I had such a strong reaction to it only further feeds my suspicion that I actually had covid last summer when I was really sick, despite the negative test I got then.  But I’m glad I got the shot, and double-glad I got the single-dose one so I won’t have to go through it again.

I feel okay tonight.  Looking forward to a nice, solid sleep, and hopefully a quiet day at work tomorrow.  I really need to catch up on things... this week has been pretty bad, productivity-wise. 

[aprilskyforever]

thought i’d give you guys an update on my life rn: i got the first dose of the covid vaccine yesterday!! the astra zeneca one. got it in the morning around 9, continued my workday without any problems, but when i got home i fell asleep immediately and when i woke up, 4 hours later, my body felt verrrry very heavy and in my head there was fever, ache and dizzyness all at once. could barely get out of bed to get water or go pee. the good news is i do feel better today! still feel weak and i still have a headache, but the fever is gone at least, and i can move around my apartment without feeling like i’m gonna faint. 

i will say though, i will take the second dose as well. even if i get hit with this again. it’ll be worth it. for everyone. 

[professionalbookhoarder]

I got my second covid vaccine shot yesterday and by 8pm felt like I had been hit with the flu. I woke up with a raging headache and had to take a tylenol. I feel alright now. Keeping my fingers crossed that the worst is over.

[gamebird]

Rambling ahoy.

I went to work yesterday, but they sent me back home due to me having COVID. I thought I'd be fine because I was 6 days out from onset of symptoms and felt okay. I hadn't tested until we got back home from vacation Saturday night, for a lot of reasons but mainly 1) I thought it was a cold and 2) on the off chance it a) was COVID or more likely b) we'd picked up COVID somewhere during the vacation and were asymptomatic; I didn't want to be trapped in a foreign country in quarantine or whatever. Plus the complication of 3) I didn't speak the language of the countries I was in and 4) was having a lot of trouble making phone calls with the e-SIM program I'd bought. So if we did end up stranded, my ability to communicate with health care providers, my work, my daughter's school, etc. was compromised. Anyway, I tested when we got back /just in case/ and whelp, we were positive.

I thought I was over it yesterday, but then in the afternoon I crashed, was tired all day, slept 9 hours last night, woke up tired, am still tired. But I've drank a little caffeine and that seems to be perking me up. Not that this is super helpful, because most of my actual work requires me to know what I'm doing, which requires learning it from the people I'm now isolated from.

Speaking of which, HR was clear that I was 'working from home'. And then my boss, who I spoke to yesterday, was equally clear that I should take it easy, rest up, and come back to work on Thursday ready to hit the ground running. I'm uneasy about these mixed signals. I'm supposedly being paid ... and I'd be happier working but all I can do from here is call a few suppliers about late deliveries (which I did yesterday and will shortly repeat). And stare at some spreadsheets that I don't have the context to do anything about.

I'm also suffering from the usual conundrum that when I'm sick, my brain doesn't work well enough to write (or usually, read much) and so my primary leisure activity is hard to do. I vaguely want to watch Yellowstone, but I don't think I'm up to following anything with a plot for the same reason.

In the course of scrolling FB, I ran across a post where someone was asking for a kitten for her 'girls' because she'd lost the one they had. I have no problem with people owning cats. I also have a very low bar for animal treatment. Anyone who knows what 'gamebird' means in terms of my alias should know that. But WTF, woman? She wants a 'kitten' that is free. Absolutely free. Won't go to the shelter because they charge a small fee and provide an animal that's spayed/neutered and vaccinated. She doesn't want to pay that. I'm not saying 'I think she doesn't want to pay for that', I mean she's explicitly posting she doesn't want to pay anything, no matter what she's getting, even if what she's getting is bog standard, required care for baseline quality of life of the pet. It really, really sounds like she wants a disposable pet with no vet care whatsoever. Given her last 'kitten' was 'lost', I ... I mean? Fuck, lady. I used to fight chickens for a living and I wouldn't inflict you on some poor cat. I'd be happier if she was asking for kittens to feed to her snake (which I've seen posts about that before and that's marginally fine with me because a feed animal is not going to have a life of deteriorating health and slow misery before dying; on the other hand, I'm suspicious of anyone willing to feed their snake rando pet animals they got for free off FB, instead of purpose-bred feed animals bought from someone with standards; I feel sorry for the snake in this situation, not the cat).

Anyway, I said nothing about this on FB but it bothered me.

Okay, this is what happens to me when I have caffeine.

Speaking of which, I'm curious if it will effect me differently now than when I had ovaries. Back then, it gave me panic attacks and anxiety.

I started back on this stuff accidentally by getting coffee flavored gelato in Italy two weeks ago, thinking my boyfriend (who loves coffee-flavored ice cream) should share it with me. He did not, so I ate it all myself and was wiredly awake for a very long time. I think it was 36 hours from time of waking to time of sleeping. Hard to tell exactly because we crossed like 8 time zones. So either 28 hours or 44. Which is why I drank some this morning. I figured it could kick COVID's ass and it's doing okay, but my logic center isn't working right and I can't string more than two or three things together in sequence. After all, I'm here on Tumblr instead of doing my work.

Speaking of which, I'm off to bung up some work!

[thisisjustafiller]

food log and daily babble

2/24

woke up at 4:30, fasted 20hrs

5:00AM: half an energy shot

9:30AM: oats, boiled egg, fake crab (320)

1:30PM: chicken bun (320)

long ass puerh session between 12:30 and 2PM

total: 640

still not feeling great. a little better, but eh. boyfriend might have covid. paranoia brain tells me he’s pretending to avoid me but I know better. around a week ago he was at a place where he likely got exposed. his one friend’s bar, who’s not masking or checking for green cards at all. today he’s fatigued (he’s been for the last two days), all over body aches and a nasty headache. just like his booster symptoms. paranoia brain also tells me that IT’S DEFINITELY COVID and HE WILL DIE LIKE OUR ONE FRIEND even though that friend had weak lungs and caught the english variant back when that was still fresh and we had no vaccines. boyf is vaxxed and boosted with pfizer and healthy to begin with so he’ll be fine. so will his friends if they got it. but he saw his grandma yesterday, and she’s world treasure. i hope it’s not covid. i hope it’s something mild and he’s just normal sick.

anyway, i’m coping with my shit brain chemistry. making a conscious effort every time i get an intrusive thought or start catastrophizing to challenge those thoughts. man it really feels like i’m back at square one. i haven’t had to work this hard since ten years ago. damn, i’m getting old.  redid my hair yesterday too. had it dyed black, so i stripped it and it’s left me a ginger. i was wanting to go ginger next anyway, so yay me.

gonna 20 hour fast again. basically same hours as yesterday. three days until dress shopping and i haven’t hit my next gw. i really wanted to lose that 10lbs before going back to the bridal shop. my guts are empty too so i know it’s not that. oh well. it might not be up to my standards but 7lbs is nothing to stick my nose up at. i still thing i stand a chance to be 150 by may, easily. i’ll go look a that calculator website again and see my projections. this last one was off by 7lbs but i also did have three days of messing around, actually four. and cico isn’t as simple as the calculator makes it out to be. whatever, time to go mess with that for a bit and then clean my room. today i’m changing my bed sheets and pretending that it will fix all my problems!

[nawilla]

A Great Big Screw You to All the People Who Think that Vaccination is a Free Choice and Not a Civic Duty.

I had my booster shot yesterday.  I woke up this morning feeling like I had been hit by a truck, and this was AFTER I took ibuprofen.

I was hesitant to get the booster shot because my body had reacted so badly to the second dose.  The day of low-grade fever and muscle aches was to be expected, but the swelling, and redness at the injection site was alarming enough that I took photos of it so I could ask the professionals administering the dose if they felt I should take it or not.  Clearly while I was having an immune response of some kind, it’s not clear if I’m actually reacting to the vaccine, the vehicle (what the vaccine is dissolved/delivered in), or to the needles themselves.  I’ve had less severe reactions to a tetanus shot, but I don’t recall having a major reactions at the site when I had rabies shots.  I have a strong family history of lupus and my late aunt was so sensitive to metals she couldn’t have surgical staples after surgery, so the possibility that I’ve now become sensitized to surgical steel really sucks.

What pisses me off so much is the part of the calculation that pushed me toward getting the booster is the current omicrom variant, which is burning through our population.  It did not have to be this way, more than 2 years post-pandemic, but people KEEP NOT GETTING THEIR SHOTS.  This pandemic is still raging, and now I have to KEEP getting booster shots I react badly to, because it’s too risky for me not to.  The concept of herd immunity is not to protect people who just don’t want to get the vaccine.  Herd immunity is for people who shouldn’t be taking the vaccine.   And if everyone got their vaccine when they should have, we would be looking at the risk/benefit analysis for boosters differently.

Vaccines are a modern miracle, but not one I take lightly.  With my family history of autoimmune disease, I carefully weigh whether each vaccine is worth the risk for the benefit.  They offered me a flu shot at the same time, but I refused because if I did react badly, I wanted to know WHICH vaccine I was reacting to. The pictures of my arm from the second dose raised eyebrows enough that I had to stay a full thirty minutes after to ensure I didn’t have a dangerous reaction (not that I wouldn’t have anyway).  But I shouldn’t have to take these risks because other people didn’t take their own dosages.  I shouldn’t have to risk sensitizing myself to vehicle (or God forbid needles) so that I can’t take vaccines in the future I might need because other people wouldn’t take their doses.  

And now I have chills, body aches, fatigue, weird fever dreams, and my arm feels like it was shot with something a lot bigger than a needle every time I move it, despite the MUCH lower dose in the booster.  And I don’t even get to stay home.  I have to ibuprofen myself into functional because we are so far behind at work from people being out due to catching covid over the holidays or getting exposed from traveling.  I am essential, in person worker.  I can’t miss work unless I’m actually sick with virus.  I can’t travel.  I can’t attend events.  I can’t risk exposure because there is no coverage if I go down and too many labs depend on me being at work.  And now I have to go to work feeling like crap because too many people who can work from home chose to avoid vaccination or chose to travel and now we have another surge.  It’s been two YEARS of this BS.  We all want it to be over, but everyone has to do their part, not just the essential people.  Vaccination is not a political statement, a freedom, or a choice you make with your own convenience in mind.  We take the vaccine because this act affects other people, not just ourselves.  It’s long past due for everyone to take one for the team, not just those who believe in science.

[soysaucevictim]

Week 1 of new stuff - some yoga and HIIT.

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Apr. 17

I woke up after 9AM, I got started on today’s exercise pretty soon into things.

First, today’s DD. 20 jumping lunges with EC. This was a bit rough/intense... but manageable work.

(Wound up taking a nap after that and watched a bit of YouTube...)

Second, Day 1 of Yoga with Adriene’s BREATH Yoga Journey / Program. This morning, I did watch the introductory videos first. Decided to experiment with my yoga blocks here. I think it’s better to be sitting on both next to each other for better support as seating. Observed a small stitch in the sides for the revolved crescent lunges. Did a mix of the variations in intensity as I went along, too. All-in-all, this was a very soothing sequence and a nice way to ease into things again.

Last, Day 1 of the 1′ HIIT Program. Figured some cardio would be a good pairing with the yoga. Level 3, 1′ rest. One thing I like about the HIIT paradigm is how short the workouts can get. 7′ of active time doesn’t sound like a lot of effort in other structures, but whew. Short but not super sweet - did note the third high knees interval was awkward to pace, fresh after loaded the left calf with more fatigue than the right (due to hopping on just that leg quickly). Don’t have a Level goal/benchmark in mind, given that sometime Adriene can kick the ass a little every now and then.

After a bit of the usual, made today’s Hello Fresh Meal. Mexicali black  bean soup. A tasty little revisit, nothing too new to say about the experience here.

After some dishes, spent rest of day on the usual and reading fanfics. Went to bed obscenely late, later than yesterday.

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Apr. 18

I woke up around noon and one of the first things I got started on was exercise.

First, today’s DD. 20 side plank crunches with EC (10/10). Manageable, if slightly intense!

Second, Day 2 of BREATH. A bit more heat today, but still very soothing during the more relaxing segments of the sequence. Always an interesting idea the themes to focus on, such as today being “Arrival“. I see that as a valuable insight. It made me think of the starting moments of my fitness journey - in a sense, I looked at every day as a new start. Now it generally feels a bit more continuous - I trust myself that I’ll make my arrival to the mat when I need to.

Last, Day 2 of 1′HIIT. Level 3, 1′ rest. Ab/back work. Though it’s nice to be able to have visual of the monitor on my desk, did carve a couple seconds off the first 10″ of bridges just to get down into position upon timer reset. Might break out the phone for the next instance of floor work for the timer part, maximize the active time. Nevertheless, fun work. :D

Hit the showers.

Watched “Blade” and “Down Periscope” with a friend for Movie Night. Rest of it on the usual stuff.

I got to bed a couple hours earlier than yesterday, but still in the red.

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Apr. 19

I woke up around 11AM and started to prep notes for an appointment today.

The appointment went well enough. As soon as I got home, I got going on my exercise.

First, today’s DD. 40 elbow plank hold step-outs with EC. I alternated sides, this time around, got into a nice rhythm with the pendulum like movement here. Did also get intense and felt my abs working near the end. Doable work.

Second, Day 3 of BREATH. “Anchor“. One of the focal concept this time around is that there Ujjayi Breath, it was nice to return and reacquaint myself with it. This sequence was particularly meditative at the start and did kick my but a lil when we got to moving around more. Perhaps arms and abs were a bit tired after the DD or being modestly sleep-deprived made this more of a challenge. But it feels good to get through it.

(After a bit of the usual...)

Last, Day 3 of 1′HIIT. Level 3, 1′ rest. There were a few moments I thought about knocking the level down a bit - but decided I was up for Level 3. Def got me winded and my arms a touch shaky from fatigue near the end. Was a good call to have the workout + timer open on phone, since it was more floor work... worked up a sweat, too!

Spent rest of the day on more of the usual stuff. Got to bed obscenely late again (hours later than yesterday.)

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Apr. 20

I woke up around 2PM... and one of the first things I did today was start on exercise.

First, today’s DD. 10 burpees with EC. Incorporated the push-up and jumping parts this time - did start to feel a bit more winded after the first 5 or so reps, but I knew I could string together 10 on the fly just about handily.

Second, Day 4 of BREATH. This was a SUPER chill workout. Low to the floor and nice and slow (relatively speaking). Definitely one for my favorites list - since it was more on the meditative side. Lotsa meditative breathing in relaxation poses here. Very nice! =w=

Last, Day 4 of 1′HIIT. Level 3, 1′ rest. Relatively more chill because it wasn’t much impact work (squats and calf raises). Definitely appreciated for current energy levels. I did still try to go as fast as possible, as per the HIIT paradigm.

Did some dishes, got aggravated about the filthy state of the laundry machines and needed to wipe them down before doing some of my laundry. Yeah, finally properly did some laundry in MY OWN HOME. So that was nice. Despite feeling disgusted by the smell of the storage room... thanks to a certain family member having been holed up there for over a year... =_=

Spent rest of night on the usual stuff. Got to bed a few hours earlier than yesterday, still in the red.

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Apr. 21

I woke up around 1PM and started on exercise pretty soon after.

First, today’s DD. 30 torso twists with EC. Fun and breezy.

Second, Day 5 of BREATH. “Replenish“. Okay, despite that theme, this kicked my butt a lil. Rather, my quads def felt some fatigue build up as we went along. The chair pose variants, and some lunge/warrior stuff - made the one arm downward dogs hard (more than the notion of finding my center/balance there).

Last, Day 5 of 1′HIIT. Level 3, 1′ rest. Arm work, intuitive sense after yesterday’s leg work. Again nice reprieve from impact work. Relatively breezy - but still felt it nicely in the arms.

I took in some deliveries, including a new lamp that I’m not sure how much I liked. It was frustrating me and I was grumpy about a lot of stuff, already...

But I made myself to get started sewing stuff in earnest, since the last thing I needed for the sewing project arrived today. I found some of my chill back, despite body complaining about my posture throughout the session. :P

I’m pretty sure I got to bed later than yesterday, despite everything starting to hurt from DOMS and being on my feet for a few hours there....

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Apr. 22

I woke up after 8AM, in order to attend a new support group for me.

It was in regard to Depression and COVID stuff and went alright - but that’s all I’m going to say there.

Got home and scheduled my own vaccine shots and arranging for transportation to them. And then took a nap.

When I got back up, spent more time scheduling trip reservations for the next few weeks’ appointments/groups. Then got going with today’s exercise..

First, today’s DD. 20 single leg deadlifts with EC. Manageable - not super refined form, but acceptable for my energy levels.

Last, Day 6 of BREATH. “Burn“. Okay, given how little sleep i was running on and how sore my calves are - I’m surprised I mostly went for the “full expressions“ today. Lotsa ab work. Didn’t really think about it very much before, but it was very nice we did some Breath of Fire practice - made a deeper sense of connection with it and what my abdominal wall is doing in the breath cycle. Did wake me up too (I like how stimulating this type of breathing is, even if my rhythm is still a bit slower than Adriene/others.)

Did some dishes and made today’s Hello Fresh Meal. Mushroom and soy ramen. Tasty... but might add oil to the cooking water for the noodles or even just throw in the noodles into the broth, near the end of the mushrooms saute step. Just because I’m still having a bit of difficulty executing the ramen noodles without them tangling and sticking together into masses. *Shrugs.*

Did dishes and spent rest of night on the usual. Got to bed earlier than yesterday, I think. Still in the red.

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Apr. 23

I woke up after 8AM, to accompany bro and our dog for a vet appointment.

Appointment went well enough and got some iced coffee before taking a nap.

Shared with grandma my sewing project progress, booked more trip reservations out to a month, chatted, and played a game of contract rummy with her and dad. After all that, I did some exercise.

First, today’s DD. 20 full bridges with EC. Very manageable.

Last, Day 6 of 1′HIIT. Level 3, 1′ rest. Lots of jumping jacks, glad I decided to raincheck this a day, since yesterday was a busy yet low energy day. Enjoyable work, though.

I spent time updating some logs, after this. And then pulled an all-nighter working on that sewing project again.