#got myself into some ds9 feels so here's one of my favorite moments | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

tailsrevane · 2 years

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ships i ship the hardest

one of the things i've always loved about tumblr, and a big part of why i'm so happy to be back, is that (and yes i know i'm dating myself here) it feels like a spiritual successor to livejournal. and frankly, i fucking miss livejournal something fierce.

so it seems like a bit of a waste to just reblog stuff & write the same reviews of media i've been writing wherever my online presence has existed for the last half decade or so. it's about time i get into that really cringe bullshit that i always used to post on livejournal. and this seems like exactly the kind of thing I woulda posted on there back in the day.

cringe is dead, long live cringe.

now, just to set some limitations on myself so this post doesn't become totally unreasonable (just reasonably unreasonable), i'm going to make a genuine effort to limit myself to one entry per show/game/whatever (i fully reserve the right to just flagrantly ignore this limitation when i so choose). i will also mostly focus on couples rather than just putting all my favorite characters in a giant polycule. cool? cool.

(cw: some of these characters will have canon age gaps and/or are minors in some canons, just assume there's an element of au-ification or time skipping here. cool? cool.)

sontails

my profile on every social media site used to include "and yet, be it cruel or comforting, this machine unerringly writes sontails angst & fluff. that's what it does." so, yeah.

i also happen to believe that they're in a big ol' gay polycule with shads & knux, and recently i've especially had QUITE A FEW THOUGHTS about shadtails (do i share that fic here? hmm. i'll think about it.)

but yeah. for me, sontails has always been the central relationship of this franchise, even before I shipped it. i got super annoyed when the franchise did dumb shit like when sonic x gave chris almost exclusively emotional beats that should've gone to tails, or when sonic unleashed gave sonic a substitute sidekick (ok tbf i was already a shipper by the time i played unleashed), or just the games increasingly deemphasizing their relationship in general.

but, yeah. probably needless to say, this one is super important to me.

godzilla/mothra

godzilla is a bratty bottom, mothra smacks him around every now & then when he gets out of line. this is just canon.

riker/worf

a lot of this is just the fact that frakes' charisma is totally off the charts, and riker is such an outspokenly openminded dude that you can kind of imagine that literally every single conversation he has with a sentient, physically compatible, appropriately-aged character has a non-zero chance of ending with them in bed. he's like a non-predatory kirk. just total throwback pulp-inspired sexually adventurous explorer dude.

and as worf is canonically his best friend, and we see several instances of them sharing a deep, emotional bond, it's kind of hard NOT to at least see possibilities for shipping here.

what really cemented this for me was when we got to season 2 in our most recent tng rewatch. this is a season that early on features riker being extremely excited to serve aboard a klingon ship as part of an officer exchange (to learn about his boyfriend's culture!), and closes with the scene i screencapped at the top of this entry of riker making worf his first officer during the wargames. also somewhere in there riker joins worf on the holodeck for his klingon calisthenics program. they just do everything together, it's so sweet.

also worf dating troi towards the end of tng & riker having clearly had a fling with dax in thomas riker's ds9 appearance really put the icing on this polycule. it's basically just canon. if picard season 3 doesn't give these two some good moments together it's gonna have some 'splainin' to do.

catdora

yes, yes, i'm being boring and shipping a canon couple. here's the thing, though. i literally started watching this show because i knew the central protagonist & antagonist were canonically gay for each other and i'm sorry but i fucking love that shit.

every time catra captures or beats up adora i feel squirmy. and then catra shows up to princess prom in a messy tux and homoerotically/threateningly dances with adora culminating in dipping her??? and guys, my little gay heart can't take it. it's too yummy. HELP.

but then season 5 happens and there's that agonizing apology AND THE RESCUE??? where a swordless adora nevertheless transforms into she-ra THROUGH SHEER FORCE OF GAY WILL & GAY ANGER to protect her kitten???? and i'm sorry, THIS IS EVERYTHING I'VE EVER WANTED OUT OF MAINSTREAM MEDIA, PUT THIS GAY STUFF DIRECTLY INTO MY VEINS.

so yeah i kinda ship them or whatever.

adiray

yeah, yeah, i’m being boring and shipping another canon couple. but i'm sorry??? they're the first trans/nonbinary characters in the history of star trek??? and they're dating each other??? and they're part of a big queer chosen family???

also the episode where we first meet gray is just one of the best episodes of the whole damn franchise? the scene where all of tal's past hosts embrace adira is just so fucking wonderful. and then once gray is literally brought back from the dead he picks just the most epic, wonderful nurturing life direction.

i love these two so much and i want them to be so happy & safe. protecc at all costs!!

lumity

i mean yeah again they're canon but fuck you i only recently started actually getting canon queer couples in shit i watch!!

but yeah seeing these two bring out the best in each other and just being absolute badasses whenever they're fighting to protect each other and also they're powerful witches, just, YEAH this shit rules. and they're so dang sweet.

flick/cj

i'm not nearly as into cj as i am into my beautiful enby punk/goth lizard boy, but i gotta admit they're hella cute together and i want flick to have all the happiness their little gay scalie heart can contain!!!

karai/leo

this is basically down to the fact that in literally every iteration of the two characters, karai bullies the fuck outta leo, and as someone who used to intensely relate to leo because he’s got “the good kid” syndrome something fierce, obviously i always enjoyed seeing her be all femdommy towards him.

nowadays, i tend to relate to donatello more than leo, but i still really enjoy every iteration of karai playing with her food with leo.

also, honorable mention to karai & april from the 2012 cgi series. the episode where karai beats the shit outta april definitely made me feel feelings the first time i saw it. and every time karai defeats or captures her she always calls her “princess” & is all condescending in general, and it’s just, fuuuuuuuuck, it’s SO gay.

also also obviously i ship basically every combination of the four turtles. i mean, duh.

russian winter

i was shocked when rewatching babylon 5 a few years ago how upfront the show was about the relationship between commander susan ivanova & talia winters. in her last appearance on the show, talia slept with ivanova, and in a later episode when everyone on the crew has to tell a deep, personal secret ivanova says that she loved talia. considering we’re talking about the 90s here, that was pretty fucking explicit.

and yeah, there’s an unfinished fic sitting on one of my harddrives about ivanova rescuing her. maybe i’ll try to get back to that at some point, idk! i haven’t been writing much fic lately.

jake sisko/t’lir

jake sisko/enby vulcan, jake sisko/enby vulcan, JAKE SISKO/ENBY VULCAN.

aragorn/legolas/gimli

it’s that thing where you take a very homosocial book and add expanded roles for some of its female characters to make it less homosocial but you change exactly nothing about how emotionally intimate the homosocial relationships are and also both gay people & people who are more conscious of the fact that gay people exist watch your movie, so like, yeah this is kinda inevitable?

gashir

i don’t even give a shit about bashir when he isn’t interacting with garak. he might as well be a non-character.

i fucking love garak he is such an amazing bratty dom. i love watching him play with his food (his food being bashir).

milippa

i mean, burnham has more feelings about georgiou than she does about any of her actual on-screen romantic partners, whether it’s for her gentle mommy domme prime universe georgiou or her badass mean domme mirror universe georgiou. i like michael with book, don’t get me wrong, it’s just hard for me to get as excited for heterosexual relationships as i do for queer headcanons, especially when one of the two participants is a mommy domme.

jaydick

i’m not super invested in this one, especially since it requires dick to be a service top and i think he’s at his most natural as a bottom, but yeah their dynamic has always been pretty charged to the point that the first gay fic i ever wrote was about these two.

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deepspacedukat · 3 years

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The Only One - Part 2: Things Left Unsaid

So the more I write of this, the more evident it becomes that this is going to be much longer than I originally anticipated. I had thought this was going to be a quick three chapter ramble, but um...at the moment it’s looking as though it’ll be closer to like...five chapters? Maybe more? I really should make an outline when I have the time, because otherwise this is going to get really out of hand, but...like...who has the time? Not me lol. Anyway, here’s Part 2. Part 2 is also cross-posted to AO3 here.

Part 1 here. Part 3 here. Part 4 here. Part 5 here. Part 6 here.

~*~

Weyoun 5 (ST:DS9) x Reader

[A/N: Spoilers in this installment for DS9: S5E19 “Ties Of Blood And Water,” so if you haven’t seen that yet, beware! Also there will be smut in future parts, so 18+ ONLY, MINORS DNI!!!]

Warnings: Some angst and descriptions of recurring nightmares to start, but it gets a little better. Mentions of casual Dominion brutality, but like...that’s kinda on par for them, so...hopefully that’s to be expected? It’s not described graphically or anything. Feelings. Lots of feelings: the good, the bad, and the questionable.

~*~

Nearly a year had passed since the day the Vorta diplomat had so unceremoniously yet politely turned my world upside down. Not a day had passed where I didn’t remember the terror and helplessness in his eyes as he was removed from existence. Not a day went by where I didn’t wish that I’d been able to help him.

That morning, I jolted awake from a nightmare as I had so many times since that fateful day, gasping for air and trying to convince myself that the dream wasn’t real as I got up to pace my quarters. Violet eyes filled with fear and pleading for my help as one would entreat their gods for mercy...pleas for forgiveness and promises to be a more useful servant had scratched away at my sanity from the dreamworld as they now so often did.

“Computer, what time is it?” I asked in a shaky voice as I wrapped a soft robe around me in some semblance of protection.

“The time is oh six hundred hours,” the automated voice intoned, and I let out a quiet groan. That was the third time this week that I’d been awakened before my alarm. At least this time I’d gotten a whole four hours of sleep. I wasn’t meant to be on duty for another three hours, but I knew from experience that there was no getting back to sleep after one of those nightmares. Walking to the bathroom, I glanced in the mirror and sighed at the thought that I’d look exhausted again today. I really didn’t want to have to endure the looks from the officers in Ops today, but such is life.

I splashed my face with a bit of cool water, took a deep breath, and threw on a clean uniform. A walk would help clear my head. It nearly always did. Wandering the corridors of the old Cardassian station at such an early hour when the residents were only just beginning to wake gave me a feeling of tranquility that I seldom felt elsewhere. I’d never felt such placidity even back when I lived on Earth. Even with the Dominion threat, there was nowhere else I’d rather be.

Pausing at one of the viewports on the upper level of the Promenade - my favorite viewport - I leaned against the wall as I took in the familiar sight of thousands of sparkling stars. Letting my mind drift like a piece of space debris, I lost myself for a time in the limitless, endless expanse of the cosmos...in just how small and insignificant my problems were in the grand scheme of things. Distancing myself from my worries like this tended to make them feel less daunting when the time came to confront them, but this time there wouldn’t be a confrontation. There was nothing I could do about what was troubling me. I hadn’t been able to save the one person who had ever known who I was...what I was.

Weyoun could have answered so many of my questions had he survived the mission to destroy the Iconian Gateway. As it was, more questions had popped up in the wake of his demise. When the Defiant had returned to Deep Space Nine, Doctor Bashir had confirmed that I was in fact half-Changeling, with Odo’s own genetic structure as a base for comparison, of course. The Security Chief and I’d had a great many conversations since then. He’d even helped me figure out more about my own abilities as a partial Changeling, coaching me through several humanoid shifts and encouraging me in my practice sessions. I’d been able to hold my altered shapes for a bit longer, depending on the complexity of the form and how much of myself I was altering. The day he’d reluctantly admitted that I was better at noses than he was, I could hear more than a hint of pride in his voice.

“Trouble sleeping, Lieutenant?” A gruff, raspy voice called from my side as I stared into the illuminated darkness outside the station. I didn’t have to turn my head to know that Odo would be giving me an impassive look that he used to try and hide his concern - one that I’d seen before when I’d first told him about my nightmares regarding the Vorta. He was the only one I’d trusted with the full content of the private conversation between Weyoun and myself. I’d told Captain Sisko of my newly-discovered heritage, of course, but that conversation had some elements that I was reluctant to share with my commanding officer. There were some things I only trusted Odo with, like the hug...the horrifying willingness to allow me to take my anger out on him...his admission that the Founders did in fact require that sort of unthinking loyalty and deference from him and his entire race. Without uttering a word, I just nodded my head and crossed my arms loosely around my middle. Odo hummed beside me and fell silent for a moment. I knew him well enough at that point to know he was simply trying to determine what would be best for him to say. “I’m...not very good at this sort of thing, and I know I’ve said this before, but...Weyoun’s death was not your fault. There was nothing you could do. I highly doubt that he would want you to blame yourself.”

“You didn’t see the look in his eyes as he was vaporized, Odo. He was so afraid,” I whispered. “He looked to someone he regarded as the only child of one of his gods and...I let him down.”

“No, you didn’t. There was nothing you could have done. None of us knew that Omet’iklan was going to kill him. Otherwise, I’d have been right there beside you,” he said surprising me into looking at him. “I trust your judgment. If you thought he was worth saving and if you’d been given the chance to do so, I would have supported you wholeheartedly. The Jem’Hadar would have had to go through the both of us to get to that Vorta. But...you weren’t given that chance. I know it’s...difficult, but...it’s time that you try and forgive yourself. It’s been almost a year. You deserve some peace.”

One of his hands rested gently on my shoulder, and I felt a small, rueful smile stretch my lips. Odo might not think he was good at comforting people, but he was wrong. He had a way of cutting straight to the point. Like Major Kira had said many times before, there’s never any pretense with him. Perhaps that was another reason I trusted him so implicitly.

“Thank you, Odo,” I murmured, and he gave my shoulder a gentle squeeze before suggesting that I accompany him on his morning security rounds. With that welcome distraction, the two of us set off, making quiet conversation in the early morning stillness.

The next couple of days were busy. With the arrival on the station of Major Kira’s almost-father, Tekeny Ghemor, and Gul Dukat showing interest in the man’s deteriorating condition, the atmosphere on the station was one of suspicion. When a Dominion ship arrived at the station carrying Gul Dukat, I was on-duty in Ops. As the ship prepared for docking, the Captain called me into his office. We were still talking when I heard the door to the Captain’s office hiss open behind me. The Captain’s eyes shifted to whoever had just entered, and when he did a double-take, I turned in curiosity at who had caused such a reaction.

At that moment, I wished so desperately that I’d been seated. Gul Dukat was there, but what had stunned both myself and Captain Sisko was the man who’d accompanied him. I felt my breath hitch in my chest as my eyes met the familiar, bright purple irises of a man I’d watched die right in front of me - a man who looked just as surprised at our reunion as I felt.

“Captain Sisko. Thank you for the kind invitation,” Dukat started. “This is one of my Dominion advisors-”

“Weyoun,” I murmured still in shock, and I was vaguely aware of the Gul turning to look at me curiously. Paying him no mind, I took a small, halting step toward the Vorta. “I don’t understand...You died. I-I saw you die.”

“That wasn't me, my dear. At least...not exactly,” Weyoun said with a small smile spreading across his features. “It is an honor to see you again, Founder.”

“‘Founder’? The Lieutenant isn’t a Changeling, she’s just a metamorph,” Dukat said with a scoff, and I gave Weyoun a small smile of my own that I hoped communicated more than I was at liberty to say in front of Dukat. There was so much that needed to be said, but I couldn’t do it here.

“I should go, but...for the record...I really did believe you,” I murmured to the Vorta, and he gave me a slightly surprised, joyful look before nodding his head respectfully as I took my leave of the Captain’s office. I felt Dukat’s eyes follow me out of the room, no doubt wondering what the hell was going on.

I wasn’t about to tell him a damn thing. At the moment, it was all I could do to force myself to slow my pace to a moderate speed-walk on the way to Odo’s office. I felt so many conflicting emotions. I needed to talk with someone about this. Hell, I needed to talk to Weyoun about all this, but at the moment I just needed somebody patient enough to help me untangle my thoughts to the point where I could decipher them.

Odo had been just as surprised as I was when I had nearly talked his ears off about Weyoun’s sudden reappearance. Bless the man, he listened patiently and curiously as I let my thoughts spill out in all their chaotic glory. Asking questions where needed and adding in small comments or noises of acknowledgment where appropriate, Odo managed to corral my thoughts into a more manageable ball of clutter rather than the random yarns of emotion and threads of possibilities unrealized that they had been previously. We’d talked for nearly an hour before he managed to convince me to go back to my quarters and try to relax before I wore a hole in the deck plating of the floor in his office.

I followed his advice, reaching my quarters in almost a daze. When the door hissed closed behind me, I nearly collapsed onto the sofa in the middle of my living space. How does a person apologize to another for not being able to save them? What was I supposed to say? My guilt had been consuming me for nearly a year, and I’d been trying to do as Odo suggested and forgive myself, but...it wasn’t that simple. Nothing worth doing was ever that simple.

After some indeterminable amount of time spent lost in swirling thoughts of over-analysis, my door chime sounded. Reflexively, I called for whoever it was to enter, only looking up when the person paused silently in the doorway in my peripheral vision. I couldn’t disguise the emotions that washed over me when I realized it was Weyoun. A soft, nervous smile spread across his lips, and I couldn’t quite make my mouth work for a moment.

“Forgive me for interrupting your solitude, but may I join you, Lieutenant?” He asked with a hopeful expression. I could do no more than nod my head quietly and gesture to the open seat beside me on the sofa. Looking as tentative as I felt, the Vorta walked slowly over and perched delicately on the cushion facing me. Clearing my throat quietly, my voice came out as a shaky, broken rasp full of emotion.

“What can I do for you, Weyoun?” I asked quietly, and I couldn’t help but feel like this interaction carried some unspoken meaning...some extra weight that felt ready to burst forth from both our chests like a butterfly from its chrysalis.

“‘Do’? Oh no, my dear. I was just hoping that we could talk,” he said, and all at once, the significance hit me. Our interaction in the mess hall of the Defiant. He was mirroring my own words back at me from that day. Something was cracking in my chest.

“Of course. If you wish to talk, then talk we shall,” I said repeating his own words back at him from that day so long ago and drawing a warm, joyful smile to his lips - one that met his eyes even as my own began to brim with unshed tears. My voice came out as a whisper when I forced it to work. “Weyoun...I’m so sorry. If I’d known what Omet’iklan was planning, I’d have never allowed him near you.”

The Vorta looked absolutely bewildered as a few tears finally began sliding down my cheeks, and he took up my hands carefully with his.

“You couldn’t have known. No one could have known, except Omet’iklan. You have no reason to apologize to me,” he said as though it should have been obvious, and perhaps it should have been. “Besides, it doesn’t matter if I die. I’m a Vorta - a clone. As I explained to Captain Sisko after you left his office, the Weyoun on the Defiant was the fourth of my line. I am the fifth.”

His explanation made sense, but...there was something so casually callous about a life being considered expendable. That troubled me deeply. Before I could think better of it, I’d dropped my lips to his wrists, placing a soft kiss on both before looking back up and meeting his astonished gaze.

“But it does matter. Your life does matter, Weyoun. Every second, every breath...all of it matters, no matter what the Founders have told you,” I said in a tone that brooked no argument. The look on his face was adorable as he slowly nodded his head. He was so innocently trying to accept what I was saying that I almost forgot for a split second that it was his own life that he was trying to accept as being non-expendable.

“Why are you being so kind to me?” He asked in a curious, yet slightly suspicious tone. At my look of confusion, he licked his lips quickly and explained. “Everyone has a reason for being kind - usually it’s a desire for something in return. What is it you really want from me?”

I couldn’t disguise the confusion that lanced through me at his question. Had I done something to come across that way to him, or was this behavior so commonplace for him that this suspicion was his knee-jerk reaction to someone being kind to him?

“What are you talking about? I don’t want anything from you, Weyoun. I never have.” I searched his eyes for some form of an answer and was met with something not so surprising. There was vulnerability beneath his suspicion. He was trying to protect himself. “I’m kind to you because you deserve kindness. There’s no ulterior motive. I have no reason to want to manipulate you, and even if I did, I respect you too much to ever try. Like I said on the Defiant, we’re equals, and I intend to treat you as such. I apologize if I’ve ever given the impression that I was only being kind so that I could get things from you. That was never my intention with any of our interactions, nor will it ever be.”

Was that too honest of an answer? Probably, but even as I finished speaking something changed in his expression. There was some slight shame in place of the suspicion from before.

“Forgive me. I should be the one apologizing to you. Being a diplomat working alongside the Cardassians naturally makes one more suspicious than is normal. I forgot to whom I was speaking for a moment,” he murmured as a lavender blush colored his cheeks. “I...really did come here to talk, not to accuse you of...unpleasantness.”

I noted that he was still holding my hands in his, and I gave his fingers a gentle squeeze as I smiled at him.

“Of course. I’m always happy to talk with you,” I answered in a quiet, much-too-open tone. “Was there something in particular that you had in mind?”

“You mentioned in the Captain’s office that you believed me, and...well, I couldn’t help but wonder if you’d had your parentage confirmed?” He asked, and I nodded my head. A proud sort of glee trickled over his face, and he looked at me expectantly.

“I had the station’s doctor compare part of my genetic structure with Odo’s, and he was able to confirm that I am half-Changeling. It was pretty big news when it was discovered, but obviously, word hasn’t left the station yet. Otherwise, Dukat would know,” I said, and Weyoun gave a small smirk.

“Your Captain explained it to him once you’d left, and he was rather surprised when I confirmed he was telling the truth. He’s accused me of withholding vital information, but it wasn’t vital that he know who you really are. If...I may ask an impertinent question?” He asked as his tone turned slightly more hesitant. “You needn’t answer if you feel that it’s too personal, but...I’ve been curious ever since my activation.”

“Go right ahead. If I have an answer that I can give to you, I will,” I said wondering what could have plagued him for so long, assuming he was activated not long after the clone preceding him was killed. Weyoun took a steadying breath and looked almost sheepish as he opened his mouth.

“On the Defiant...When I first beamed in with the Jem’Hadar, you changed your eyes to look like mine,” he said, and I nodded my head encouragingly. “May I ask why you did that? Please do not misunderstand, it is an honor to be mimicked in such a manner, but usually circumstances are rather more dire when such an action occurs.”

It was my turn to blush. I knew the answer damn well, but I didn’t know if he’d be offended by it or not.

“I...To tell you the truth, I...was curious,” I admitted. Taking a steadying breath, I continued on in a quiet, slightly embarrassed voice. “Your eyes are so striking...so beautiful. I was so focused on the shape and the shade that I...I’d meant to wait until I was in my quarters to see what it felt like, but...well...”

I trailed off with a sheepish shrug, averting my eyes.

“I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable,” I muttered, and one of Weyoun’s hands lifted up and tilted my chin up.

“You didn’t. I promise. What...What did it feel like?” He asked with curiosity and a hint of reverence in his tone. I was a bit taken aback. Nobody ever asked what it felt like before.

“Oh. I...Sorry, nobody has ever asked what changing feels like before now,” I stammered for a moment trying to gather my thoughts. Weyoun gave me a patient, encouraging nod, and I had a thought. “I...may be able to answer you better, if...Would you mind if I tried again?”

He looked as though I’d just offered him some form of holy sacrament. With a silent nod of his head, Weyoun lowered his hand from beneath my chin. Before it could drop entirely, I caught it in mine and looked up into his eyes. I felt my heart speed up a little as I focused on the shape and color of his eyes. I willed away the natural shade of my irises in favor of the ones so focused on my face. From my own experience watching my transformations in the mirror, I knew the second my eyes began to change in a way that Weyoun could see. He gasped quietly and I tried with all my might not to blink so he’d be able to see the full transformation process.

I’d never showed anyone the full process before, only the before and after. Being this open with the Vorta felt like I was baring a wound to him and just trusting that he wouldn’t pour salt in it.

“I-It feels...” I blushed at how unstable my voice had come out. “It feels new...soft...”

Weyoun’s breathing sped up slightly when I brought his hand to my lips.

“It’s exhilarating,” I breathed, but when I looked back up I found him closer than I’d expected. My own breath stuttered as I searched for the right thing to say, for some other way to describe what the transformation felt like.

“And intimate?” Weyoun asked in a tone that suggested he hadn’t really meant to say it out loud. His face went a slightly darker shade of purple, but I didn’t give him a moment to regret what he’d done. I nodded my head and reached carefully up to cup one of his burning cheeks, feeling my heart clench when he leaned into my touch.

He was so gentle...so beautiful when he was encouraged and safe. Feeling like this about a Dominion ambassador could be dangerous. Slowly, carefully, as though I might shy away, Weyoun leaned forward and touched his forehead to mine. His breath fanned softly against my skin as he spoke so lightly that his words would have been easily carried off in a slight breeze.

“Founders, I missed you.” His voice was rough with emotion as both our eyes fluttered shut.

“I missed you too. I-I thought I’d never see you again...that I’d lost you forever,” I admitted in the same quiet tone he’d used. There was so much more that I needed to say, but my words didn’t feel like they were strong enough. Weightlessly, all I could do was take shaky breath after shaky breath, reveling in the nearness to a man of whom I should be much warier. He worked for the Dominion. I should be distancing myself from him, not wishing I could take away all the pain the Founders had inflicted upon him.

“You’ll never lose me. No matter how many of me are activated, I’ll always find my way back to you,” he muttered, and his words sounded uncomfortably like a confession of something that neither of us could afford given the circumstances. But...I couldn’t deny the effect his statement had on me. Silently, I brought my other hand up so I was cupping both his cheeks in my palms.

“You’ll always have a place with me,” I whispered, and it was his turn to let out a trembling exhale of a breath. A few short moments of silence passed comfortingly before my door chime sounded, startling us out of whatever spell we’d fallen under. Reluctant to move, I lowered my hands carefully to Weyoun’s chest, keeping my touch as light as a feather. “Who is it?”

“An old friend.” I groaned quietly as I recognized the voice. Dukat. Leaning back a bit from Weyoun, I gave him an apologetic look that I hoped said more than I could safely voice at that moment. Lowering my hands from his chest back into his grasp, I gave the Vorta’s fingers a gentle squeeze as I called for him to enter. There was enough distance between us now that we looked like we’d been doing nothing more than having a rather intense discussion as Dukat strode in, arrogance coloring his every step. I remembered just a split second too late that I’d yet to change my eyes back to their normal shape and color. Dukat smirked as he obviously saw the remnants of purple fading from my irises. “So...when do I get a...personal demonstration of your abilities, Lieutenant? If you are servicing the Dominion’s most important members, then you should remember that Cardassia is now a vital part of the Dominion.”

“There’s no need to be crude, Dukat. We were just talking,” Weyoun said with a hint of poison in his tone. His grip tightened almost imperceptibly on my hands, and it occurred to me that the Vorta was attempting to protect me.

“The Lieutenant and I used to talk quite often when I was here on the station, but never so...intimately,” Dukat murmured. “We spent months together bonding over Ziyal’s care, and yet you never once sought more. What has the Vorta promised you? Hm? What is he giving you in exchange for your...kindness?”

“Nothing. Good people don’t need a reason or incentive to be kind to others, Dukat. That’s something you’ll never understand,” I answered with a defiant tilt of my chin. The Cardassian let out a raspy, mischievous laugh at my tone, cutting my patience off at the source. “Either tell me what you want or leave. I’m busy.”

“I can see that,” he taunted as he walked slowly over to the sofa where we were seated, stopping only a few feet away. “I came to see for myself if what the Captain and Weyoun told me about your heritage was true.”

“About one of my parents being a Changeling, you mean?” At his nod of confirmation, I gave Weyoun a glance. “Well, it’s true. I didn’t know myself until about a year ago. Now, if that’s all, I’d appreciate it if you’d-”

“Not quite. You see, an ability like that could be quite useful to the Dominion...to Cardassia...to me...” he trailed off with the insinuation, and I felt my stomach turn. “I’m sure you’d like to spend more time with the Ambassador, here, and Cardassia is quite lovely this time of year. You’d have every luxury that your position affords you...”

“Not a chance, Dukat. Now get out of my quarters while I still allow it,” I snarled, and his eyes narrowed.

“Are you threatening the head of the Cardassian government?” He asked in a quiet, dangerous tone.

“No. Just giving some life-saving advice to a man who claims he’s an old friend,” I answered as I reluctantly released Weyoun’s hands and brought myself to my full height. There was no way in hell I was going to allow Dukat to intimidate me in my own quarters. “Now. Get out.”

With a last smirk, the Cardassian gave me a half-bow dripping with sarcasm.

“As you wish...Founder.” Having uttered his sardonic parting jibe, Dukat strode out of my quarters every bit as arrogant as when he entered. I let out a breath that I hadn’t been aware I’d been holding. Trust Dukat to spoil a moment like that so spectacularly. A quiet call of my name from the Vorta still seated on my sofa knocked me out of my thoughts, and I turned to see him looking up at me with concern written across his features.

“Are you alright?” Weyoun asked quietly, and I took my seat again.

“I’m fine. Dukat just takes some sick sort of joy in trying to get under my skin. I’m sorry. I’ll tell the computer not to allow any interruptions in future,” I muttered, regretting that the two of us had gotten so close only for Dukat to trample the moment to dust under his standard-issue Cardassian uniform boots.

“There’s no need to apologize. I know quite well how tactlessly he can behave,” Weyoun commiserated, and with a small, warm smile he looked into my eyes. “Thank you for allowing me to witness something so miraculous and personal. Would you consider having dinner with me tomorrow night, my dear?”

I hated how effortlessly he could make me smile.

“Only if you promise Dukat won’t be invited,” I said with a playful wink so it would be obvious that I was teasing. He let out a surprised laugh and placed a hand gently over one of mine.

“That is easily accomplished. Nothing turns the stomach more than that man droning on and on during the main course about how he was Bajor’s savior,” he said in a conspiratorially low voice, even though there was nobody who could have overheard us. A quiet chuckle escaped me at the mental image of Weyoun’s beautiful eyes rolling in exasperation when Dukat wasn’t looking. “I...I’ve taken up too much of your time tonight as it is. I should let you rest. No doubt it has been a long day, and my reappearance was most likely a shock.”

“A pleasant surprise,” I corrected turning my hand palm up to grasp his. I looked up to his eyes and felt my questions die in my throat. I couldn’t have feelings like this for him. “Thank you for taking the time to come and speak with me.”

“Always, my dear. I look forward to dinner tomorrow,” he said bringing my hand to his lips. I echoed the sentiment, and with a soft smile, Weyoun made his way out of my quarters. With a sigh, I dropped my head into my hands. What the hell was I to make of all this? I’d spent a year mourning a man I barely knew who’d done me the singular kindness of telling me about my father. Now he was alive again...able to answer questions again...and he wasn’t angry at me for not having been able to save him. Not for the first time, I wished this station had a counselor I could talk to. As it was, all I did - all I could ever do - was talk to Odo and spend more time staring out the viewport in my quarters as I contemplated what to do.

When the next night rolled around, I got changed out of my uniform as soon as I got off-duty. Throwing on one of my favorite comfortable yet still presentable outfits, I tried to make myself look a bit more casual than my usual pin-straight, professional, on-duty self. Normally, I was quite a private person, choosing to spend most of my downtime in my quarters or in the company of a select few friends. This - having dinner with a Dominion ambassador-turned friend - was entirely new to me. Was friend the right word? Could it ever be considering how Weyoun’s genetic coding practically forced him to think of me as better than him? I had been thinking about that a lot since the night before. Had his offer of dinner come from his own desire to get to know me, or was it a desire forced on him by the Changelings’ alterations to his DNA? I’d have to be careful. I couldn’t be as casually intimate as I would be with my own friends, because it wasn’t yet clear to me how consent would work with him. If I asked permission to hug him, would he accept because he wanted the hug, or would he accept because he thought it would make me - a being he saw as the child of his gods - happy?

The door chime shook those thoughts away, and as I straightened my outfit one last time, I called for my guest to come in. Taking a small breath, I turned just in time to see Weyoun walking gracefully through my door. The moment his eyes fell on me, he drew a surprised breath. Right, he’d never seen me out of uniform before. He smiled warmly and began a slight bow before stopping himself.

He remembered.

“My apologies. Habits are rather hard to break. I must ask your patience,” he said, and I smiled as I shook my head.

“Don’t apologize. I know from experience how long it can take to break a pattern of behavior that you’re used to. And Weyoun...you’ll always have my patience,” I promised as I walked over to him. A slight purple blush colored his cheeks and he raised one of my hands to his lips.

“I hope you don’t mind, but I thought you might like to have dinner together in a more private setting than Quark’s or the Replimat,” he said as he ushered me out of my quarters toward some destination known only to him. We chatted a little on the way, and soon we came across one of the empty conference rooms. Weyoun opened the doors, and when I looked at him in confusion, he just smiled. “I asked Odo for a favor.”

My curiosity got the better of me, and I walked inside. The table was set rather nicely, and there was a tray of various drinks from Quark’s at the side. Trust a diplomat to set up a lovely evening like this. He was used to schmoozing other ambassadors, so why had I expected anything different?

“Weyoun...this is lovely, but you didn’t have to go to all this trouble for me,” I stammered as I turned to face him. The soft, hopeful look on his face froze me in place as he moved slowly toward me.

“Oh, it was no trouble, I assure you. Do you really like it?” He asked with a tentative smile, and it almost hurt to see just how much he wanted to make me happy. I took his hands carefully in mine and smiled as I looked into his eyes.

“Of course I do, but...all this...is it what you want too? I want you to take your own desires into consideration when we socialize, not just what you think mine might be.” At my words, Weyoun gave my fingers a gentle squeeze.

“I am taking them into account. You told me that you’d rather have my honesty than my devotion, and to be entirely honest with you, this is what I want this evening, as well as what I thought you might want,” he said with a tone of sincerity that I thought - and hoped - was genuine. “I may not know what some of this food is, but Quark assures me they are dishes you’ve ordered before in his establishment. I’ve not had the opportunity to sample many Alpha Quadrant dishes outside Cardassian cuisine.”

“Well, I’m certain we can find something to your liking,” I said with a smile as the two of us took a seat at the table to explore what he’d obtained for us. As we sampled dishes, Weyoun explained that the Vorta hadn’t the ability to taste things as I would perceive it. He could experience textures, but flavors themselves were severely dulled. When he mentioned offhandedly that it was part of how the Founders coded the Vorta, I tried my very best to hide my frustration and indignance on his behalf. It was such a pleasant evening that I didn’t want to ruin it with my philosophical musings about a situation I could do nothing to change. Weyoun must have been able to read some of my conflicting feelings, however, because he gave me a little smile.

“We can taste rippleberries and kava nuts, though. They make excellent snacks and there are some rather complex recipes that the Vorta have developed over the years,” he explained, and that at least made me relax somewhat. They weren’t totally denied food-based pleasure, then. I’d have to find out if there was a way I could get some of each. Perhaps I could find a way to make some Alpha Quadrant style dishes out of them...

Once we’d finished eating and were engaged in conversation, I finally got up the courage to ask something I’d been wondering about since the day we’d first met. Biting my lower lip nervously, I took a deep breath and gave voice to my nagging curiosity.

“Weyoun? I...I know you said the Dominion had followed my father’s trail in the Alpha Quadrant, and...well, I was wondering if there was anything you could tell me about him?” My voice came out shakier than I would have liked. “It’s just that...all my life I’ve thought he was dead. I thought there was no chance I could ever know anything about him because the only one who could have answered my questions was my mother. She died when I was little, so I really have nobody else I could ask.”

Weyoun gave me a look that I couldn’t quite decipher before clearing his throat quietly.

“I’m afraid I don’t know his current whereabouts - I’d have to speak with the Founders about that - but I can tell you what little I know of him if you like?” He offered, and I gave him an encouraging smile and nod of my head. “Very well then. I suppose I should begin with the fact that his name was Meris. Not many Founders choose names, but ones who enjoy spending time both in and out of the Great Link do sometimes make a selection.”

Meris. When the Vorta paused, I almost subconsciously muttered the name, testing the syllables as I processed the information.

“From what I understand, your father had always been rather willing to take risks. He was wise and patient until his curiosity was piqued. Once that happened, he had a one-track mind. He would hunt down his answers with a singular determination. Anyone who stood in his way was done away with.” At that last sentence, I could practically feel my blood freeze in my veins. My eyes widened a bit and I thought I’d misheard him - surely I had, right?

“Wh-What do you mean?” I stammered, and Weyoun looked at me curiously as if he couldn’t understand what had startled me so completely. He tilted his head and his brows furrowed together, but he answered my question nonetheless.

“Well, he was biologically curious. Meris was one of the main reasons that the Vorta cloning process was made possible. Experimental genetics fascinated him, hence his interest in the process which allowed Changelings to have offspring with solids,” he explained and I felt a singular growing horror.

“He...H-He’s the one who started the Vorta cloning?”

“Well, not entirely, but he did make the final breakthrough that made the process possible,” Weyoun said, and even though I wanted so desperately for him to stop - for this all to be an elaborate lie - I knew I had to hear the full story. Not knowing might be easier, but if I were ever to fully comprehend where I came from - what might be lurking in my DNA - I had to make it through this. I had to hear it all. “The cloning would have been entirely useless if future clones retained no memories, so your father managed to create the final step that allowed clones to keep their memories.”

“...And...how exactly did he test his theories?” I was terrified of the answer. There was no way it could be anything ethical.

“Meris activated and...well, de-activated several dozens of clones until he observed successful memory retention,” Weyoun said, and I felt my stomach turn.

“‘De-activated’? Y-You mean he killed them?” My words came out as barely a whisper.

“Well, yes, but they were just clones. There was no harm done,” Weyoun said calmly, and all at once, it became almost impossible to breathe. Before I realized it, I’d pushed out the chair I’d been seated in and paced the length of the room, trying in vain to corral my thoughts into something more manageable. I’d been under no delusions that the Changelings had done some horrible things, but this...I knew somebody would have done it, but my father? I hadn’t been ready for that. Vaguely I was aware of Weyoun calling my name before his hands came to rest on my shoulders. When had he gotten up? His purple eyes bored into mine and he looked visibly worried for me. “What’s wrong? I thought you’d be proud to hear of your father’s accomplishments.”

“‘Accomplishments’?” I barely breathed the word. “Weyoun, my father was a murderer. To throw away lives simply to satisfy scientific research...that’s not ethical. That’s not right. Every life is precious and important, and the Vorta’s lives are not any less significant just because they’re clones.”

I hadn’t realized I was crying until Weyoun’s hands moved carefully up to cup my cheeks as his thumbs brushed away my tears. After a moment’s silence, he spoke quietly.

“You really aren’t like the other Founders, you know. You’re gentle...so full of love, even for those whom you will never know,” he sounded deep in thought, as if he hadn’t really meant to speak at all. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you. I forget how unfamiliar you are with the Dominion’s practices and how jarring this all must seem.”

“That’s one way to put it,” I said quietly. “But you...Weyoun, you really don’t need to apologize. I’m the one who asked and I suppose I should have been more prepared for an answer that I didn’t want to hear. You were just trying to be helpful.”

I placed my hands over his and forced a smile through the last of my tears. I could hardly believe that my father was responsible for the perception that Vorta’s lives were expendable. What else had he done? Had he taken away their sense of taste? Encoded their unwavering loyalty? Previously I thought I wanted to meet my father if he was still alive, but after Weyoun’s disclosure, I wasn’t so sure anymore.

“Is there anything I can do to ease your mind?” He asked in a quiet, almost intimate voice as his eyes searched my face for answers I might be unwilling or too afraid to give. It struck me that despite whatever horrors my father and the rest of the Changelings had subjected the Vorta to, Weyoun had still managed to hold onto some sort of kindness. Whether he pitied me, thought kindness would get something out of me, or if it came from the goodness of his heart, Weyoun had shown more consideration and concern for me than anyone in his position would reasonably be expected to. The child of the person who caused so much of his suffering...I deserved his hatred, not his compassion, and yet he still gave it to me seemingly freely.

To be frank, I was in awe of his strength. He endured so much from the beings he thought of as gods, yet he never complained. I had to find some way to fix this or to at least right some of my father’s wrongs. I refused to turn out like him - like the rest of the Changelings. I was so lost in thought that I’d nearly forgotten that Weyoun had asked me a question. Turning my head just far enough that I could press a soft kiss onto his wrist, I heard his breath catch.

“I’ll be alright. That just wasn’t what I was expecting, to be honest. It’s just a bit of an adjustment from assumption to reality.” My words came out quietly, and Weyoun gave me a silent nod. “Thank you for asking me to dinner tonight and for putting up with my rather ill-timed curiosity. I really have enjoyed the time we’ve gotten to spend together.”

“My dear, it has been my pleasure. You make wonderful company. I only wish my stay here could last longer so that I might have the opportunity to spend more time with you.” I couldn’t help but agree with him. I knew that his position within the Dominion meant that he would be headed back to Cardassia as soon as the situation with Ghemor was resolved, but...I wanted so badly for him to stay. As odd as it was, there was something comforting about his presence. He made me feel safe and seen in a way I’d never experienced before.

“Then we’d better make the most of what little time we do have,” I said with a warm smile, and Weyoun looked positively elated.

“Oh, we shall! Make no mistake, there is a multitude of things I’d like to experience on this station before I return to Cardassia. Perhaps you could assist me?” At his question, I agreed readily. I could easily indulge some of his more innocent interests, assuming they didn’t compromise security of course. “Excellent! Simply delightful! Thank you, my dear. Now, it is getting late, and I fear that if I don’t bring you back to your quarters soon, I might be tempted to keep you here all night. May I escort you back to your quarters?”

“Only if it’s no trouble. I don’t want you to worry about it if you’re tired,” I said, and he waved a hand to dismiss my concerns. Offering me his arm, Weyoun gave me a playful little wink. Judging by the blush that heated my cheeks, I was in trouble. He shouldn’t be able to get to me this easily. I continued to muse on that as the Vorta walked me back to my quarters arm-in-arm. This was quite the conundrum. Once we reached my door, the two of us stopped, and I turned to face him.

“Thank you for the lovely evening, my dear,” Weyoun murmured as he brought my hand to his lips as he had at the start of the night. “I hope you sleep well.”

“Thank you. I hope you do, too,” I said with a smile, and all too soon, he was bidding me goodnight with a soft expression on his face and walking gracefully toward his own quarters. There was still so much to say...too much for one visit alone.

#weyoun 5 #weyoun 5 x reader #weyoun x reader #deepspacedukat fic #some angst to start #but it gets happier #kind of

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theunemployedrogue · 4 years

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Tag meme

Rules: tag 9 people you want to know better/catch up with then answer these questions

Tagged by: @astercorvidae (thank you v much, this is a much needed fun distraction at the moment!)

3 Ships:

[Rogue’s comments - Since there were no specific instructions for ‘3 ships’, I decided to create a theme for myself for this section lol -- 1st is a newly discovered ship, 2nd is a ship from a fandom I’ve been at least somewhat active/involved in recently, and 3rd is a beloved OTP that’s survived the ages. If you do this ask meme feel free to use my suggested format, or delete this comment/ignore/go with your own preference! :] ]

1. Garak/Bashir (Star Trek: Deep Space Nine) - A recently discovered ship

When I say ‘recently discovered’, I mean until last night I’d literally watched like 2 episodes of DS9 in my life and had no idea who these characters were. Yesterday evening I just happened to see a post about the What We Left Behind documentary that prompted me pull up DS9 on Netflix and look into things for myself. According to the post I saw, the crew and actors of DS9 had toyed with the idea of making the couple of Garak/Bashir canon but weren’t willing to “push the envelope” back in the 90′s.

So after watching some key episodes featuring the pair, I gotta say I’m honestly surprised how much “subtext” still got through back then. Scare quotes around subtext because uh...the sexual tension and romantic overtones in their conversations and interactions are pretty blatant to me. And although they’re never technically enemies at any point, I do like there’s some (justified) suspicion from Bashir toward Garak in the beginning that gives their relationship room to develop over time.

Honestly, as much as I love Star Trek TOS & TNG I’ve never really given DS9 a chance until now, but between these guys and and other characters like Quark, Odo, Kira, and Sisko, I think I’m hooked and will be binging the whole series here soon!

2. Zuko/Katara (Avatar: The Last Airbender) - Ship from a fandom I’ve been active-ish in recently

So I recently rewatched ATLA and fell in love with its universe and characters all over again. My favorite ship has always been Zutara since I first saw the show several years ago. They both get a lot of personal and interpersonal development over the course of the show and have a great dynamic between them by the end -- and again, I admit I’m always a sucker for ‘enemies to friends to lovers’ ships so there’s that lol.

No hate for the canon ships in ATLA, even if I don’t think those were always handled the best, but Zutara is just my personal fave. My fave canon ship is probably Sokka/Suki :)

3. Bones/Spock (Star Trek: TOS) - Longstanding OTP

Like most folks, my first TOS ship was Kirk/Spock (and I still love them), but Bones/Spock is probably my favorite ship across all the fandoms I’ve been in. I can’t nail down a precise reason -- I like their bickering, the fact their conversations range from petty snarking to legitimate philosophical debates, the ‘we’re not friends but I’d totally die for you’ attitudes from both of them, & their juxtaposition as the id and superego of the TOS triad among other things.

Of the 3 ships on this list, this is the only one I’ve actually ever written fanfic for, though I never posted any of it online back when I was active in the fandom. I dunno if any of my Star Trek content will ever see the light of day tbh lol.

I think the reason Spones is ultimately my OTP over K/S is a) I’m partial to rival ships, and b) I’m partial to Bones as a character -- love me that sassy Southern doctor with a heart of gold, man.

Last Song: lol god according to my youtube history last thing I listened to was a nightcore remix of the Tetris music (typical lmao)

Last Movie: Watched Elmer Gantry with my grandma at her request. Usually I like most of the old movies she recommends but I can’t say I was a fan of this one tbh

Currently Craving: Nothing at the moment really.

Currently Reading: god I’m bad... can’t say I’ve read much of anything in months aside from fanfic occasionally. Oh. And a 180 page technical guide last month... very interesting stuff haha....

Tagging: @specterofthepast, @moiraabsinthe, @docnoctem, @deviousdevilx, @bi-magician, @pyrebomb, @phantomidealist, @w-e-chard, @bookgroper

[I just grabbed some folks from my recent activity page, feel free to disregard OR if I didn’t tag you and you decide to do it please @ me I always love to read other’s responses!! (dun worry u do not have to be as wordy as me lol, I just happened to get hyperfixated and well @_@)]

#ask meme #meme #tag meme #long post #text post

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thehumanarkle · 7 years

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[NOTE: I had to make some changes to this post after I realized I screwed up and there were 9 episodes in the first half of the season. I goofed on account of only the first 8 being visible on the CBS Discovery page. All points made refer only to the first 8. To minimize the amount of editing I’d need to do, I’ll keep my thoughts on Episode 9 to myself for now.]

Okay, I have watched the first eight episodes of Star Trek Discovery, and I have some thoughts.

1: The pilot isn’t very good, but compared to other Trek pilots, it could’ve been worse. Overall, I’d place it about equal with “Caretaker,” but better than “Encounter At Farpoint” and “Broken Bow.” “The Emissary” and whichever one you count for TOS (”The Man Trap” for air date order, “Where No Man Has Gone Before” for production order) top the list. My biggest problem is that if the intent was to convey that Burnham’s bad choices in these two episodes (I count both as the pilot since they dropped the same day) was partly the result of her concussion and partly her years of suppressed human emotions bubbling up at the worst possible time, that should’ve been made clearer. I mean, if that was the intent. If so, I actually like the idea. Not the execution though.

Also, the title was wrong. I know some people have griped about the story Burnham tells where the title, “The Vulcan Hello,” comes from, but that itself actually does make sense. But to phrase it the way they did makes it sound, albeit unintentionally, that the Vulcans shoot first with everyone else, not just the Klingons.

2: I have mixed feelings about Rainn Wilson as Harry Mudd. Part of that has to do with the actor being somewhat problematic, but I’m not going to get into that. The other part is, while his performance was certainly enjoyable to watch, as a lifelong Trekkie I’m a bit uncomfortable with the idea of Harry friggin’ Mudd being kinda scary. I mean, even scarier than Capt. Lorca, who I am pretty sure is on the verge of a total breakdown thanks to his untreated PTSD. That said, his (Mudd’s) second episode is, so far anyway, my favorite of the season. Definitely one of the better uses of the Moebius Loop I’ve seen (though not as good as Stargate SG-1′s “Window of Opportunity”, but what can ya do?)

3: The new look of the Klingons sucks and I hate it.

4: I didn’t like it at first, but the design of the title ship has grown on me.

5: In Lt. Stamets, Anthony Rapp has somehow managed to give us a chracter that, IMO anyway, is somehow both more annoying AND more likable than his Rent character.

6: Feminist critiques of this show about WOC not named Michael getting killed off left and right? Valid. Here’s hoping they cut that shit out in Season 2.

7: I really wish the Fanboys would stop bitching about the spore drive. Yes, we know they don’t use it in TOS and beyond. But that doesn’t make it a plot hole; there’s still a whole half season to go, and I bet by the end of it we’ll get a reason why the drive was discontinued. I don’t know if it’ll be a good reason. I certainly hope it is. But it will be a reason. So calm the fuck down.

8: For those people ready to write the show off completely based on the 8 episodes we’ve had so far, let’s just take a look at where the other 5 live-action Trek shows at this point in their first seasons.

TOS: This almost isn’t fair considering it was this show’s iconic status that allowed the others to exist in the first place, but allowing for both the production technologies and social norms of the time, we’ve got 7 good episodes, and 1 episode that can’t really be judged fairly because a lot of the series rules weren’t in place yet; hell, they hadn’t even locked down Kirk’s middle name. Sulu was in a blue shirt. We had no McCoy, Scotty, or Uhura. Obviously, I’m talking about “Where No Man Has Gone Before” here. So, we’ll call that a success rate of 7/8. TNG: As a kid, I loved all of these, but with the benefit of hindsight, there are no good episodes here. The Ferengi were introduced, but it was Deep Space Nine that saved that Trek species from ending up just a regrettable footnote. “Where No One Has Gone Before” (not to be confused with the TOS pilot) has some pretty visuals going for it, but that’s pretty much it. 0/8. DS9: The only episode from DS9′s first 8 I would call bad is the Q episode, but even that is saved from garbage by virtue of Sisko punching Q in the face. The Pilot’s the only good one of the bunch though, with the rest just being okay. So, we’ll go with 7/8, but with an asterisk. VOY: 2 mediocre episodes, plus 1 episode that introduced an interesting villain that the show sadly completely failed to utilize properly (the Vidiians). Neelix suffers a fair amount in that episode though so I’ll round up to Good. The rest were just plain bad though. 3/8. ENT: One of the first episodes gave us Jeffrey Combs as Shran. Granted, the episode itself wasn’t that great, but later on they were able to do more with Shran, and eventually give us a greater glimpse at Andorian culture, so I’ll be generous and give that one a good score. The rest of the episodes were just varying degrees of bad (with “Unexpected” crossing over into full-on offensive). 1/8. And that’s me being generous mind you. So how does DSC stack up, at least in my opinion? Well, apart from “The Vulcan Hello” and “Battle at the Binary Stars,” there hasn’t been an episode I’ve truly disliked, and even then I didn’t hate them. I was more disappointed than anything else. So, when you add up the episodes that were okay with those that I liked (so far only 3), you get a First 8 Episodes score of 4/8.

So, sorting by rank you get (remember, this ONLY applies to the first 8 episodes of the first season, not the series overall); TOS: 7/8 DS9: 7/8 DSC: 4/8 VOY: 3/8 ENT: 1/8 TNG: 0/8

9: Oh, I forgot to mention this; he can have his douchey moments, but overall, I like Saru. Though I imagine him being played by Doug Jones has a fair amount to do with it.

10: This scene didn’t bother me at all.

If they were going to do the F-bomb, at least it was in the context of an exclamation of excitement, and not something sexual or insulting.

In Conclusion: It’s not a great show. But it’s not the dumpster fire much of the Internet would have you believe it is. I think it can be a good show though and hopefully, CBS will take at least some of the feedback they’re getting from critics and fans into account. Not all though, because honestly some of the criticisms are bullshit.

All that said, CBS All Acces is terrible and this show should be on NetFlix seeing as NetFlix subscribers already helped pay for the series to begin with and it is flat out gross that people who already paid for this show once (by way of their NetFlix subscriptions) can’t actually view it (in the U.S. anyway) without paying again. THAT criticism of the show is not bullshit. It is one I 100% agree with.

#star trek discovery #Thoughts #how long before some assholes decides i'm not a real trekkie because of this post?

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gplusbfics · 7 years

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1994 Interview All About Garak & Andrew Robinson

I’ve seen this great interview posted a bunch of times online, but it’s alway seems to be as graphic scans, which I have a hard time reading, so when I actually got my hands on DS9 magazine Vol. 9, 1994, I was psyched. I could read it AND I could scan it! So here it is, with all the text, plus photos. I’ll be posting the photos all separately afterward, including a few that don’t fit. Enjoy!

I love Garak and Andy so much. Also, I love that this interview is all after Season 2 (and I believe before Season 3 aired), so you have Robinson saying things like “I wish I’d get to do more plots with Rene and Avery!” and “It’s going to really interesting when Garak’s secrets come out!” He he. It’s really zero surprise he wound up writing a book. Or that the book would be well written -- he uses great words in the interview, just popping in stuff like “apotheosis.”

-Wendy

According to his former superior in the Obsidian Order, Garak has a "rare talent for obfuscation." The same, fortunately, cannot be said of the man who plays him, Andrew Robinson. Given the chance, he willingly expounds upon the delights of playing this charming, yet devious, Cardassian.

"This role has been quite surprising and wonderful," Robinson says. "The way the character is progressing is a delight for me. When I auditioned and got the part, I had no idea that it was going to be a recurring character. They've been writing really interesting things for Garak; each time that he appears, there's something more to play."

What first attracted him to the role was "the mystery about the character. At the same time, there was also this wonderfully refined and urbane intelligence about Garak. Not only did he have a secret, but his secrets were very deep and potentially very interesting. I don't know where it's going from here, but I look forward to the day --- if the day ever does come -- when the truth about Garak emerges. I have a feeling that the secrets he has are going to be a great deal of fun to play."

Because he didn't receive any back ground from the Star Trek: Deep Space Nine writers or producers, "I just created my own, so I had something to work from," says Robinson. "I went for the approach of something that was reptilian, someone with cold blood, who would have that same deliberate, measured style. In terms of mystery, I played 'I've got a secret.' The writers and producers have been taking what I'm doing and building from that, as well as whatever they have in mind for Garak, which really is the best. Very few shows do this. Very few."

Not surprisingly, Robinson's least favorite aspect of this role is enduring the makeup. "That's the worst part of it. Garak is a three-and-a-half hour makeup job. Sometimes I'll have a 2 or 3 a.m. call! There are seven prosthetic appliances that they put on, including the neck. It teaches you a lot of patience," he admits. "Once I'm in it -- and these are long days I put in on the set, 14 to 16-hour days sometimes --- I just have to 'Zen' out. Otherwise, if I start getting cranky, then I'm done; I can't act or do anything. I really have to move into an almost beatific state. I have lost weight, though; that's one good thing!" he adds, laughing, before relating a more serious makeup-related tale.

"When the earthquake hit in January, it was 4:30 a.m. in Los Angeles, and I was already in the makeup chair, along with Armin Shimerman [Quark] and a couple other actors. It was pretty bizarre: this earthquake hits, all the power goes out, and all these aliens in varying stages of makeup are milling about in the darkness! People like Armin and Ed Wiley, who was playing this Cardassian, couldn't get through on the phone to their families, so they just jumped into their cars -- Armin in his Quark makeup and Ed with his Cardassian makeup on -- and drove through the pre-dawn streets of Los Angeles. I can only imagine what the other motorists saw -- I think that would be more bracing than a cup of coffee!"

Robinson made his Deep Space Nine debut in the series' second-to-air episode, "Past Prologue." There, "plain and simple Garak" made first contact with Dr. Bashir (who immediately suspected him of being a Cardassian spy) and helped foil a fanatical Bajoran terrorist's plot. Interacting with the Klingon sisters Lursa (Barbara March) and B'Etor (Gwynyth Walsh) proved to be some of Robinson's favorite moments. "That was just a gas!" he exclaims. "We had a great time doing those scenes; I hope we can do that again."

Garak next appeared in "Cardassians," where he was instrumental in uncovering a scandal concerning the abandonment of Cardassian orphans on Bajor after the war. "The best thing about that was the scene where he and Bashir go to Bajor and run into the orphans. We learned a little more about their culture, that children without parents have no status in Cardassian society, so they just abandoned them. The fact that Garak was faced with this, and realized that there is something very basically wrong about it, was great."

Although both Bashir and viewers alike still wonder which side (if any) Garak owes his allegiances to, Robinson thinks that "Garak's a good guy," and cites the second season episode "Profit & Loss" as "the turning point. When I got that script, I thought, 'Oh, I guess this is the end of Garak,' as I was reading. Then, I got to the end and he decides, no, he's not going to kill Professor Lang and her student dissidents, nor turn them in. He has the change of heart and lets them go. He was faced with that moral dilemma, and for most Cardassians, there would have been no dilemma; they would have just done what they were expected to do." The actor hastens to add, however, "That's not to say that the man doesn't have an... ambiguous past. He's very complicated, very ambiguous, and there's no doubt that there are things in his past that aren't very nice. He is, after all, Cardassian!"

One of Robinson's greatest pleasures on Deep Space Nine, he says, has been working with Siddig El Fadil, who plays Dr. Bashir. "Siddig and I get along so well, and we have become very good friends from this show. The chemistry works out beautifully, where you have this older, reptilian mystery man who isn't what he seems to be, and this young innocent. It's easy to see what Bashir's getting from Garak: a political education. He's learning about the byzantine, labyrinthine subtleties and intricacies that go on in the station.

"It's less clear, but equally strong, to see what Garak is getting from Bashir," he continues. "Bashir is a very decent person, a veru moral man, a responsible scientist with a soul. I think Garak is learning some of this, becoming socialized. I don't mean 'humanized,' because that would be a 'specist' thing to say. He's gaining a certain sense of compassion, a certain morality and that's very touching-that's what I love about the relationship."

That being said, Robinson would also like to see Garak interact more with the rest of the Deep Space Nine crew. "It's a great company! I would love to do more with Rene Auberjonois; he and I have known each other forever. I think they'll have me do more with Quark this season, because we had some really nice scenes together in 'Profit & Loss.' Armin and I worked together just before DS9, in a production of Richard II. Also, I would love to do much more with Avery Brooks. He's a very powerful actor who has a lot of wonderful inner strength."

Garak's next two appearances, "Crossover" and "The Wire," showed two very different sides of the Cardassian. In the Mirror Universe, lntendent Kira Nerys rules Deep Space Nine, with Garak as her menacing second in command. "That wasn't hard to do," Robin.son says, "but that was interesting because I found the negative image to Garak: that Nazi, that typical Cardassian persona of the oppressor, the fascist, the totalitarian. There are no secrets to this man -- and no hiding any from him; he's just into sheer power. [The real] Garak is not into pure power at all; that's not his agenda! Now when I come back to Garak, I have more information about him, and he will be a deeper character as a result."

Robinson's favorite episode to date, "The Wire" raised many questions about Garak's past and provided very few concrete answers. When an endorphin-releasing implant in Garak's brain begins malfunctioning, Dr. Bashir goes to great lengths to save his friend, ultimately discovering that Garak, among other things, used to be part of the Obsidian Order, a secret information-gathering Cardassian police force renowned for their brutal tactics. "'The Wire' was a dream," Robinson notes, "the type of episode I would like to do -- well, not all the time, because I would die! -- but frequently. That's the kind of episode that does indeed stretch my 'acting muscles,' because it demanded that I go inside myself and pull things out that perhaps didn't want to come willingly."

Originally a New England native, this "man behind the mask" recalls that "as long as I can remember, I wanted to be an actor. Not necessarily as a profession, but I always wanted to act. When I was 10, I went to this school in Rhode Island that had a wonderful drama program. It was run by a man who became my mentor. He was very supportive and helpful, and I just did plays and plays and plays."

Robinson describes his college days similarly. "I had an art history teacher who encouraged me to apply for a Fulbright Scholarship to study acting in London. I did, and I got it against all odds," he explains. "When I was studying at the London Academy of Music and Dramatic Art, I was doing a student production of Anton Chekhov's The Seagull; I was playing Constantine, this young man with a lot of troubles, and I had -- I can only call it an apotheosis -- this very deep emotional experience. That's when I decided I would act for a living."

This led to several years of stage acting until Robinson landed his first movie role as the Scorpio Killer in Dirty Harry. "I liked Clint Eastwood," he says, "but for me, the excitement was working with the director, Don Siegel. He was an amazing man, the best director I've ever worked with. Basically, he taught me whatever I now know about filmmaking. The character I played was very underwritten and very under-realized in the original script; it was only because Don Siegel was the kind of director he was that he hired me and said, 'OK, give me the character.' At the time, I had no idea the kind of chance he was taking. It just blows my mind!"

With his film career established, Robinson appeared in all manner of movies, TV shows and plays. One of his most visible roles came in an ABC TV movie, Liberace. Portraying the flamboyant entertainer, Robinson says, "was a great experience. It ended up being one of the best things I've ever done. You see, the art of acting, for me, is quite liberating. There's a lot of freedom have when you're behaving in the skin of another person, so to speak. That, to me, is the most interesting thing about being an actor . Also, I never wanted a nine-to-five job, and I'm grateful for the fact that I've been able to fashion a career where I work at jobs and a job doesn't work me."

Robinson first attracted the notice of SF and horror aficionados with his work in Clive Barker's debut film, Hellraiser. "That was a wonderful experience," he says fondly. "For one thing, the character chance to play two characters, basically, the good and evil sides of the same person, was a thrill. The good brother, Larry, was quite repressed, and behind that repression was his evil brother Frank.

"Also, working with Clive Barker -- who's a genuinely mad, eccentric genius ---was a lot of fun. It was his first film; he really didn't know much about filmmaking, so he really had to rely on people around him who had more experience, and he was open to that. It became a genuinely collaborative experience, and there was a lot of creativity flowing on the set, which doesn’t always happen.”

His next genre appearance came in Child's Play 3, in which the evil doll Chucky arrives at a military school and terrorizes the cadets. Robinson played the sadistic barber, Sergeant Botnick, who gets a fatal shave from the diminutive killer. "A friend of mine, Jack Bender, was directing it and asked me to come in and do this character," Robinson remembers. "Jack's a very bright guy, and he saw something that I couldn't see at first reading. Then, we got working on it, and what happened was one of those fortuitous occasions when I made something really interesting, a character who was like nothing I had ever seen or done before. Sergeant Botnick the barber usually goes totally unnoticed, but it’s a piece of work that I'm very proud of."

Similar circumstances led him to Trancers Ill as Colonel Daddy Muther . "Again, it was a friend of mine, Courtney Joyner, who wrote and directed it. I did it because he asked me to. He had written the part for me, and because he was a friend, we were able to create the character as we were shooting it. Unfortunately, the shooting circumstances were very pressured because resources were very limited. It was an extremely low-budget film, and also Courtney's first ." Robinson got along very well with his fellow cast, however. "Tim Thomerson, who played the lead, is terrific, a very funny, lovely guy. I enjoyed working with him a lot."

While lately he has been appearing in projects with a definite SF slant, Robinson says he doesn’t have any one favorite genre of acting . "One of the things I appreciate about myself -- if I may say that -- is the range I have. It's something I've developed consciously, because I really love playing different kinds of characters. For example, in this British farce by Alan Bennett called Habeas Corpus, I played a guy who sells and adjusts false breasts! It was a funny, crazy role, just knock-down British humor. And in the middle of it, I went back to Rhode Island to do my one-man show, which is a very serious meditation based on if Jesus had kept a diary. This person/actor finds the diary, shares it with the audience, and ends up portraying different aspects of Jesus and His life. It's that kind of contrast that turns me on as an actor."

To Robinson, the most enjoyable aspect of playing a recurring character like Garak is the chance "to explore the character from various angles, so that you go from 'plain and simple Garak' to an episode like 'The Wire,' which goes into a very deep, personal story about the man. You get the kind of information about a character that you rarely ever get in a single episode, or indeed a single film. The writers don't sit down with us and say, 'OK, this is where your character is going,' and I rather like that . It's a surprise every time I get a script!"

In future episodes of Deep Space Nine, Andrew Robinson feels that viewers will eventually learn the truth about Garak. "Right now, all we do know is that he's in exile and he misses his homeland very much," he notes. "I know the producers have really become attached to the character, which means more and more of a commitment to me. For instance, this season I will be on the show several times. I think eventually, by the time the show ends, we will know where Garak is coming from. Perhaps we won't understand him completely in terms of his motives, or the 'why' of Garak, but I certainly think we will understand the 'what' of Garak, what he's doing on the station."

Was this not an awesome article and interview, or what??? -Wendy

#andrew robinson #elim garak #ds9 #deep space nine #star trek ds9 #star trek #star trek interview #ds9 magazine #andy robinson

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notallpotatoesarefrenchfries · 7 years

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Rules: you must answer these 85 statements and tag 20 people

I was tagged by @yoshifics, which was a nice surprise!!!

Tagging: I won't specifically tag anyone because this one is a doozy, but I implore you to try and do it if you want to do it!!!

On to the show

the last … 

1. drink: diet mountain dew ((my mom is addicted and well...the apple doesn’t fall far))

2. phone call: most phone calls are forced upon me, but the last one was my mom telling me to take another important phone call i was unwilling to pick up

3. text message: my friend Sarah

4. song you listened to: Not about Angels by Birdy

5. time you cried: uhhh. I know it was recent but I don’t know specifically what day. I really cry for no reason sometimes idk.

6. dated someone twice: I’ve never dated, and I don’t think I'm willing to start either at this point in my life

7. kissed someone and regretted it: Never been kissed

8. been cheated on: never dated

9. lost someone special: My grandpa and friendships that never worked out.

10. been depressed: I’m not diagnosed because I don’t talk about my issues to a very extreme degree, but I’m pretty sure I’ve been depressed.

11. gotten drunk and thrown up: never had a drink of alcohol

favorite colors

12. Blue

13. Purple

14. Black

in the last year have you…

15. made new friends: Yasssss! Every new friend I’ve made has been a blessing! I’m looking at you, mutuals!!!

16. fallen out of love: Never been in love

17. laughed until you cried: yes, it is a beautiful thing to experience.

18. found out someone was talking about you: nah

19. met someone who changed you: Again, looking at you mutuals

20. found out who your friends are: I found out that a friendship I'm in is toxic, but I’ve not yet worked up the courage to break it off yet. Other than that, nah.

21. kissed someone on your facebook list: never been kissed

general

22. how many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: uhhhh. I don’t really get on my Facebook so I don’t know how accurate this statement is, but I’ll say yes!

23. do you have any pets: My family has a miniature dachshund. And my sister has two king charles spaniels so I count them too since she is over all the time. When I am old enough and living alone (( I don’t think I’ll have met someone/ect by this point but we’ll see where God takes me)) I want a king charles spaniel((they were breed for cuddling)) and maybe a black cat but I’ll have to think about that one since I’m allergic.

24. do you want to change your name: I like other names but I’d never change my own.

25. what did you do for your last birthday: My last birthday was Fathers Day so it was really just whatever he wanted to do. I’ve not really done anything for my own in awhile. Bright side is that I told my Dad I’m his biggest dad joke.

26. what time did you wake up: 10 because I’m being lazy as much as possible before that turns into 5 for swimming.

27. what were you doing at midnight last night: well I was talking with my friend, pattonpending. If the deer thing had happened to thomas I was off making puns on his twitter posts.

28. name something you can’t wait for: Is it sad that I can’t think of something. Maybe going back to school so I can see my non-pocket buddies.

29. when was the last time you saw your mom: Today

31. what are you listening to right now: Somebody That I Used to Know cover by Christina Grimmie

32. have you ever talked to a person named tom: Yes. My ((evil)) high school swim coach was named Tom and some guy at my campus is named Tom and although I’ve talked to him, its really just saying hi to him. At my campus, everyone greets everyone. Its a very social atmosphere which is good for when Ive got a full introvert battery and want to talk.

33. something that is getting on your nerves: Myself 24/7. I really need to treat myself with more kindness.

34. most visited website: I don’t think there is ONE website I visit the most. It really depends on the day.

35. hair colour: Dark Brown ((It has red in it but you can’t see it))

36. long or short hair: Long. I’ve not had a haircut in awhile.

37. do you have a crush on someone: does a friendship one count? Like I really value our friendship/ want to be your friend. I don’t have any romantic ones and don’t think I ever have

38. what do you like about yourself: well I can draw, and people say my mannerisms are cute, Im tall(6 ft), I have a gold ring around the middle of my eye, and I give good hugs :)

39. piercings: none at all

40. blood type: no idea

41. nickname: Tator tot, Tay, Tay-Tay

42. relationship status: single wondering if I really want to mingle or if I just want cuddles.

43. zodiac: Gemini

44. pronouns: She/Her

45. favourite tv show: So many ugh. I’ll give a few: Merlin, Doctor Who, Hetalia, Star Trek ((DS9 is my fav)), Teen Wolf, Supernatural, and Parks and Rec

46. tattoos: Im too indecisive to choose, but no.

47. right or left handed: Right-handed.

48. surgery: nope

49. piercing: none

50. sport: I’m a swimmer and I swim the mile((1650 yards)). It takes around 20 minutes to finish it.

51. vacation: I went to Germany and Poland in May. It wasn’t to visit happy locations, but I really wanted to visit Germany in any way. I took German years ago, and love the culture. I am sad to say I’ve lost a lot of it which is why I follow some German blogs on here.

52. pair of trainers: ((Tennis shoes?)) Yes. The sport of swimming doesn’t let you get away with one type of training. We do land training ((we call it dryland)). So, I have a pair for that

more general

53. eating: Nothing yet today. Pasta is my fav food.

54. drinking: usually diet dew. During the school year coffee is a sunday thing and I drink lemonade instead of soda.

55. i’m about to: Eat.

56. waiting for: nothing atm

57. want: Uhmm. I want to be hugged by someone taller and stronger. I was so touch starved going into college I actually prayed to Jesus to give me someone who will give lots of hugs ((thats a little sad looking back)). I just wanted the kind of hugs that dean would give cas or the one hug merlin got when he was found coming out of a bog. I found someone who gives hugs, but not the hug where you feel protected and engulfed in. Im usually the one giving that.

58. get married: My idea of any sort of romance is like the New Girl situation where you have someone who totally understands you and all your quirks but still loves you. Not really looking for anything sexual, just cuddly.

59. career: looking to be an art teacher.

60. hugs or kisses: Hugs!! Idk anything about giving/ receiving kisses sooo...

61. lips or eyes: uh....

62. shorter or taller: I don't mind either (( are we talking about friends or...?))

63. older or younger. I dont mind either

64. nice arms or nice stomach: People usually use me as the shoulder stomach thing so idk. I really do want to be in the other role at some point.

65. hook up or relationship: Relationship

66. troublemaker or hesitant: hesitant. Last time someone asked me out I panicked so hard I cried.

67. kissed a stranger: Nope.

68. drank hard liquor: never

69. lost glasses/contact lenses: yes. When you lose a contact lense, they go off into the void to be lost forever.

70. turned someone down: yes ((see 66))

71. sex on the first date: Never had sex and never dated

72. broken someone’s heart: Not that I know of

73. had your heart broken: nah

74. been arrested: Listen buddy if I am like that spongebob moment where he’s crying and saying I'm a good noodle. So getting arrested is hardcore not something I plan on doing.

75. cried when someone died: yes

76. fallen for a friend: nope

do you believe in …

77. yourself: no but I am trying to work on that

78. miracles: yes

79. love at first sight: yes

80. santa claus: nope

81. kiss on the first date: idk

82. angels: yes

other

83. current best friend’s name: I can’t choose.

84. eye colour: Blue/green ((it varies)) with a gold ring around the middle

85. favourite movie: I can’t choose. I have such a soft spot for Rise of the Gaurdians though.

Thanks for tagging me @yoshifics! This was long and hopefully I overshared something about myself to the internet! Be kind to yourselves!!!

#me #tagged

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holodexmachina · 7 years

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We Need To Talk About The Nazis

Oh, YIKES—I knew it had been a while since I'd written here, but I didn't realize it'd been quite this long, my goodness. In my defense, getting through the end of DS9 has been like a dental cleaning; VOY hasn't offered me any tempting morsels; the election and subsequent universal garbage fire used up all my bandwidth; plus I got awfully caught up watching The Adventures of Bone Pope: The Pope Who Bones—and all of that pushed Star Trek to the side. My apologies.

But last week I found myself drawn, once again, to the paleofuturist comforts of TOS, and what better episode to watch in the spring of 2017 than season 2's "Patterns of Force"? Why? Because it's twenty goddamn seventeen, and for SOME UNFATHOMABLE FUCKING REASON, Nazis are once again an active threat to lived humanity. IT'S A GREAT TIME TO BE ALIVE

"Patterns of Force" is one of those irritating science fiction moments wherein the teevee writers get bored with the limitations of their space ship and go pillaging history and mythology (via time travel and/or holodecks) in an effort to shake things up. This is how we get Nazis/Greek gods/gangsters/Robin Hood INNNN SPAAAAACE, but I can't criticize too much: there was that time I walked into a sushi bar in San Antonio and heard a mariachi band playing "Glycerine," and who doesn't love a good cross-genre cover? (Listen, that band was HECK OF good, A+, would choose them over Gavin Rossdale.)

"Patterns of Force" isn't the only episode of Star Trek to explore the 1940s (and no, ENT doesn't get extra points for creativity). But it is the first. And given the current political climate in America, it seemed valuable to absorb. I was curious about how Nazis were portrayed in such a campy universe, and so soon after the end of the war. SPOILER: THEY DID A BAD JOB AND THEY SHOULD FEEL BAD.

My favorite part is the tanks parked on the White House lawn. (from Enterprise episode “Storm Front”)

Fine, we can talk about plot

In this episode, the Enterprise visits the planet Ekos while searching for a missing historian named John Gill, formerly one of Kirk's Star Fleet instructors (because of course he is). The Federation lost contact with Gill shortly after he went undercover to observe Ekosian culture. Kirk and Spock beam down to Ekos and OH MY STARS AND GARTERS it turns out that Ekos is absolutely identical to Nazi Germany. Except they speak English. And have interplanetary travel.

Ekos features a lily-white monoculture that includes both native Ekosians and settlers from the nearby planet Zeon. The two peoples, apparently, had been living in perfect harmony, until nativist Ekosian Nazis came to power and began oppressing the Zeonians. Naturally, Kirk and Spock are curious as to how a centuries-dead shithead political movement took root on an alien planet (right down to the branding), and it quickly becomes apparent that Gill—that is, the Fuhrer—is to blame.

Kirk and Spock knock out some SS and steal their uniforms to infiltrate headquarters (right across the street from where they have magically beamed down! Very convenient, always showing up near major governmental buildings), but they are immediately recognized as non-native, and taken away to be tortured.

Ugh Nazis

Let's take a moment to appreciate how fucked up this first act is: fucking Nazis. We're on a planet full of fucking Nazis. As if that weren't bad enough on its own, we also get to see Kirk and Spock wearing Nazi uniforms, and it is stomach-turning.

Wow.

Imagine being Nimoy and Shatner—Jewish actors—donning these costumes, a scant twenty years after the end of World War II. Twenty. Like, really think about that. Twenty years ago from today was 1997; that was fucking yesterday.

Maybe I'm just overly sensitive right now because, I don't know, Nazis are trying to take over my government? Listen, I was born in 1981, which means that for most of my life (at least for the place/perspective I was born into), Nazism was not, and never would be, a real threat. A terrible, egregious, sickening chapter of history, yes, but history—a gross relic.

As with any example of bad human behavior, we were supposed to have learned from history. We were post-historical and therefore evolved, smarter, more sensitive, more empathetic. More human. And yet HERE WE FUCKING ARE, worried about Nazis in 2017, and I am terrified, and I am furious at humanity for letting me the fuck down.

I used to laugh at episodes like this, as if the concept of showing Nazis was somehow intrinsically trivial, a novelty, a particularly silly plot device, a flimsy excuse to get out of the spaceship. It's not fucking funny now, and I'm wondering how it must have felt during writing and filming and screening: how could we—how DO we—play make-believe against the backdrop of one of the worst atrocities in human history?

Because these are never stories about the Holocaust. The concept of oppression serves as scenery, but it's never addressed directly. "Patterns of Force" is big on the signifiers of the era—the clothing, the language, the insignias—but never fully grapples with its reality. The characters, and thus the viewers, are no more than tourists.

Ugh plot again

Back in the episode, Kirk and Spock get away from their captors and, with the help of a fellow prisoner, make it to a resistance cell. It's clear that Gill, as the Fuhrer, has broken the Prime Directive pretty aggressively and somehow managed to, I don't know, trip and spill Nazism all over this society by accident? Kirk maintains the belief that this is all a misunderstanding, that Gill would never go Nazi—the classic "he's a good man" defense—but has no explanation otherwise.

With the resistance cell, they re-infiltrate the headquarters and track down the Fuhrer's office, where they find Gill catatonically sedated by "drugs." At this point—we're pretty much in the last five minutes of the episode—it comes out that the REAL power in this government is held some guy named Melakon. We haven't really seen him in the episode yet, but, trust us, he's been apparently secretly in charge this whole time! Also, he's extremely evil!

I mean, look at that haircut.

Melakon has been keeping Gill sedated to prevent him from... revoking Nazism? Look, I could see why, during a fascist power grab, you might have to neutralize your enemies, but once you have that power, it's unclear to me why you would keep that enemy around through a combination of horse tranqs and a poorly guarded office. But hey, I'm not a Nazi, I guess I wouldn't understand.

Through mindmelds and ill-advised amounts of uppers, the crew manages to ascertain that, yes, Gill DID bring Nazism to Ekon on purpose, but he only meant to do the GOOD parts, see. The GOOD parts of Nazism, like the trains running on time. AND THAT'S NOT EVEN TRUE, YOU ASSHOLES

Just NOPE

I hate LITERALLY EVERYTHING about this premise.

First, let me just say that only the most privileged fucking white cishet trust fund dude in your freshman philosophy class would suggest the "efficiency" of Nazism as a societal cure, no matter what problem plagues that society, because literally anyone with a hint of sense slash empathy slash lived experience knows that you don't fuck around with genocide.

Second, no one in the episode bothers to question the hemhorraging flaw of this premise, which is the idea that the Nazis were just so efficient! It's accepted at face value, which is necessary in order to leave the reputation of Kirk's former professor intact—see, Gill only suggested Nazism for the economics! He didn't mean any real harm! Anyone could have made that mistake!

Except: no, FUCK NO, any amount of Nazism is too fucking much Nazism, and only a racist dickhole would think otherwise. (Memory Alpha tells me that this theory about Nazi efficiency was "a popular notion in 1960s America." Gross, America. Gross.)

The THIRD problem this creates is the episode's resolution: Kirk is convinced that the solution to getting rid of the Nazis is for Gill to tell the whole planet that the bad parts of Nazism—you know, the racism and the killing—weren't part of the plan, and then everything will be FINE! So Gill gets on the ... planet-wide megaphone? and tells everyone that the murder is all just a fun misunderstanding, and could they please stop the missiles on their way to Zeon?

And then Melakon kills him. But then it turns out that someone high up in the Nazi party was secretly in the resistance, and HE kills Melakon! And that means that Nazism is over and the planet is saved! Roll credits.

So the argument goes: Nazism is a totally fine and efficient societal structure, as long as the person in charge of it isn't evil! But if they're evil, then, well, then it's bad.

Going Nazi

I deeply dislike the use of the word "evil" to describe people because it removes their agency. "Evil" just seems to happen to people; it's not really their fault, they're just compelled to act against humanity, you see, by magic! When, really, we're talking about people who are just, well, people.

In a recent (and excellent) Leah Letter, Leah Finnegan points to a 1940s article by Dororthy Thompson called "Who Goes Nazi?" that really drives this whole idea home for me. Nazis are evil, sure, but calm down: evil is a quality available to all humans.

It's not magic; it's not special. Thompson's gist is that many people have the capacity to become Nazis—particularly if they are thwarted or bitter, if they are accustomed to power, if they are status-hungry, if they are mean or unhappy or petty or self-centered. (Also there are the supremacists.) All it takes is a little bit of power concentrated in a circle of shitty, small-minded people, and you get fascist politics.

For this to flourish, it also requires less-shitty people to not care, to be quiet, to pretend, to sell out. It's not just about those who go Nazi; it's also about those who don't question them. Many many people make shit decisions in an effort to get closer to power, validate their hatred, or just live their lives in a way that they perceive to be easier. And that's all without one singular mastermind at the helm.

Which is why cutting off the head is such a bullshit resolution. No matter how many time travel fantasies would have it otherwise, killing Hitler was not the end of Nazism. But "Patterns of Force" is only resolved by pinning the blame on an individual. This is naive and misleading and destructive; fascism is a movement, not one man behind the curtain. It can't happen without the consent of many.

To ignore that is to ignore the culpability of the citizenry: the small evils inside everyone, the injustices we enable. It ignores our own culpability in propping up power.

Punch more Nazis

This is, perhaps, my biggest problem with Kirk: his moralizing, even when he's doing the "right" thing, mostly centers comfortable mainstream experiences. His choices maintain the balance of social and economic power in 1960s America. And in 2017 America, that power looks an awful lot like fascism.

Maybe only twenty years post-war, everything was still close enough, still fresh enough to frame Nazism as efficiency gone awry. Maybe it was still visceral enough that more direct engagement would have felt hamfisted. (After all, Germany didn't even allow this episode to be aired publicly until a few years ago.)

But in 2017, I can't listen to Kirk's weak rationalizations without rage. If you're going to send your spaceship to Nazi Germany, you have to come prepared to stab at its black heart.

And that heart is, upsettingly, our own: our complicity, our silence, our willingness to live a comfortable life regardless of the hardships faced by others. That's not because a magical evil infected us; that's because we're human and, as we've proven over and over again throughout history, quite capable of such things.

So force us to examine our support of the system. Shine a light on power dynamics. Implicate us without mercy. Anything less is tourism.

#star trek #TOS #star trek original series #politics #evil

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dramallamadingdang · 8 years

Text

Oh, God! Question meme! A really long one! Run! Hide!

Tagged by @ajaysims. *points* It's his fault! His! Not mine! ;)

This is really long, since it's a synthesis of two of these questions memes and I have verbal diarrhea. So, I cut.

Name: Katrina

Nicknames: Most RL people other than my kids and grandkids call me Kat because one syllable is less than three. :) Simmers call me iCad because that's what I chose to call myself when I started participating in the community. Hubby calls me Kitten. Kids call me Ma, usually in exasperated/long-suffering tones. Grandkids call me Mimi because I hate the usual things that grandmothers are called because they're associated with old people. I may be old, but I'm not old, y'know? :)

Zodiac sign: Taurus, but astrology is still bullshit.

Height: A hair less than 6'0/about 182cm. And very underweight due to digestive/metabolic issues mostly because of a malfunctioning liver. (No, not from alcohol. From having had asymptomatic Hepatits C that I most likely got from a blood transfusion in the early 80s, before they screened donated blood for that. It sucks, y'all. Cherish your liver. Baby it. Seriously. Stop with the alcohol. Just stop. Do weed instead.)

Orientation: In experience/practice: A Kinsey 2. In terms of the kind of person who attracts me: People with IQs over 130. I really, truly don't care what you look like, what gender you identify as, or what sex organs you have or don't have. Smart is seriously sexy. So, I'm sapiosexual. :)

Ethnicity: Whitey-white-white, yay! :| Glow-in-the-dark white. I-start-burning-in-the-sun-in-30-seconds white. Damn-near-albino white. Also, mostly of Welsh descent. Only sort of half-second-generation American on one side; my paternal grandma was one of those horrible immigrants who took a job away from a Real American(TM). She was even a somewhat illegal one, for a few months. But she was white and British so I guess that's OK.

(Sorry, as a person married to a man whose mum -- who is awesome -- was born in Mexico and who came here legally with her family when she was 7 and is a citizen but she still gets shit these days because she’s “a Mexican,” I've sorta come to really hate the kind of people who tend to call themselves Real Americans(TM).)

Favorite fruit: Okra, especially when part of aloo bhindi masala, an Indian dish. Okra IS a fruit. Really. Look it up. Also, tomatoes.

Favorite season: Autumn, when everything is dying. MWAHAHAHAHAH!

Favorite book series: Still Sharon Kay Penman's "Welsh trilogy." Also, though not really a series, per se: The Star Trek novels that were published in the 80s. They got mostly stupid after that, but there were some gems that were published in the mid-80s, before The Next Generation was a thing.

Favorite flower: Calla lilies. Usually used in funeral arrangements, along with Easter lilies, yay. Flowers of death! MWAHAHAH!

Favorite scent: Lilacs. Lavender. Honeysuckle. And this "rain" scent scented candle. It's so clean and fresh and not-perfumey, yet it manages to drown out the brine smell that eventually permeates everything when you live close to the shore...

Favorite color: Greens. All shades, although I prefer the yellower shades, especially the darker ones like army green. Also, orange.

Favorite animal: The spotted hyena, but I already extolled their many virtues the last time I did this list, so I'll refrain. Also, elephants.

Coffee, tea, or hot cocoa: Hell no, maybe, and yes please (if it's vegan), respectively.

Average sleep hours: Sleep? What is this word? *just came off a 38-hour work "day" a few hours ago, and I'm too wired to sleep.* YAY SHOWBIZ! :| But generally, when life isn't crazy, usually about 6 hours per 24 hour period. And I'm nocturnal, so those six hours are usually between about 0900 and about 1500. :)

Cat or dog person: Both person. And llama person. And alpaca person. And horse person. And snake person. And spider person.

Favorite fictional characters: Spock. (Well, actually, pretty much the entire original Star Trek crew except, well, Kirk. Whom I hate. With a passion. I really like Abrams-Kirk, though. Oddly enough. So it might just be that I can't stand Shatner...) The Cardassian characters from Star Trek: DS9, but especially Garak. Also, Julian Bashir and Miles O'Brien from DS9. Jack O'Neill and Rodney McKay from the Stargate franchise. KITT from the original Knight Rider. And Jayne Cobb from Firefly. (Hi, @eulaliasims!)

Number of blankets you sleep with: I'm in SoCal at the moment. No blankets because I tend to sleep in the warm part of the day. And when I do sleep at night, there's a furnace-like husband and a large, furnace-like dog in the bed with me. Blankets would be overkill.

Dream trip: Still Antarctica. Or space. But Antarctica is more likely at this point. ;)

Blog created: I think it was December of 2013. Maybe November. Ahhhh, those halcyon pre-2016 years...

Number of followers: Right now? 1443. It might change in an hour or so.

Time right now: About 0220 Pacific Time, Wednesday, March 22. One month and one day until my birthday. I expect presents, people! (Nah, I kid. Birthdays after 50 don't mean much. Hell, birthdays after 18 -- or 21, nowadays, I guess -- don't mean much. :) )

Last thing you googled: I was looking for some textures to use for some recolors I'm working on during downtimes at work.

Fave music artist: In terms of non-classical stuff: Queen, always and forever. But I also really like the Barenaked Ladies and other such alternative groups from the 90s as well as 80s New Wave stuff. Also, Metallica. In terms of "classical" stuff: Beethoven, always and forever.

Song stuck in my head: Beethoven's 8th piano sonata, 3rd movement. I was playing it at work today...on my cello. I'm working on arranging the entire sonata for solo cello...starting with the 3rd movement because I do better working on things backward. (Since I'd be willing to bet most people don't know the tune off the top of their head, here's Dubravka Tomsic playing it on youtube, if you're curious.

Last movie I watched: Star Trek Beyond. I liked it better than Into Darkness but not as well as the first Abrams-verse one...

Last TV show I watched: I have Stargate Atlantis paused on my computer screen at the moment. I plan to work on furnishing/decorating the house I put up for download tonight when I'm done with this, and I usually have a TV show playing while I build/decorate stuff in my game. :)

What I’m wearing right now: A pair of black sweatpants and a Telluride Daily Planet T-shirt. (That's the local newspaper at home. :) ) Boring white underwear. My fleece-lined moccasins because my feet are always cold.

The kind of stuff I post: Sims stuff, duh! At least on this blog. :) The other blog has the ranty/political stuff.

Why did I choose my url: Because I like to point and laugh at silly internet drama and because I own llamas, and I added dingdang because dramallama was taken and because of this song.

Gender: According to every one of those silly "What Gender Are You?" online quizzes, I am male, mainly because I'm a self-confident, argumentative, assertive, non-empathetic asshole who doesn't do "feelings." Yet, I have girl plumbing. Go figure. Meh, it's all just social conditioning and expectations, anyway, so...I rebel. I reject gender labeling and their associated roles.

Hogwarts house: I took a quiz once and it said Gryffindor. I've never read Harry Potter or seen any of the movies except one of them during an airplane flight...and I fell asleep during it, so...Yeah, I don't know what it means to be Gryffindor. Don't much care, either.

Pokémon team: Don't know anything about Pokemon, either.

Lucky number: 13 because I am anti-superstition. (Well, except when it comes to white pianos, of course, but I have hard evidence that they are evil, so it’s not superstition. ;) ) Or 42. Take your pick.

Dream job: I once said "Not having one" but then followed it up with "but that's boring." So, I decided to take on some work through June. And you know what? I'm gonna go back to "Not having one." I just need to find some volunteer work to keep me occupied for a few hours a day. Not for 38-hour "days," though. :p

Relationship status: I is married to my second husband. He's cute. And a lot younger than me, woooooooo! First marriage wasn't nearly so fun, though. The only good thing that came of it was my kids.

Pets: Oh, God. Most of them are back home in Colorado (where I have a 39-acre ranch) while I'm here in California, but:

A herd of llamas and alpacas, about 50 total at the moment, but "unpacking" season is approaching, so that number will be going up to about 65 soon. 5 horses 2 nanny goats...which actually belong to a neighbor but they're currently housed on my property, so...they count! 8 dogs 5 cats...although sadly that will probably be going down to four soon because the 18-year-old whose had health problems all her life is currently quite sick and likely won't be getting better. :( Also, there are a ton of barn cats, but they don't really count as pets. A flock of chickens. 1 rooster, the rest hens. 1 California kingsnake 5 tarantulas, various species 8 dragonfly nymphs. I think 2 will become dragonflies this year because I've had them for a few years now...

Last song you listened to: Beethoven's 5th piano concerto, for somewhat sentimental reasons.

Favorite TV Show: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. I love the original series a lot, too, but DS9 surpassed it in my book.

First Fandom: Star Trek, of course. I remember declaring that I would marry Spock when I grew up. I was 3 at the time, in 1967, watching the episode "Amok Time" (in which Spock almost gets married) in its original run. We'd only just gotten a color TV a few months before, so it was REALLY COOL. I also wrote a crapton of fanfic in the 70s/80s and a bit in the 90s. Even published a 'zine in the 80s. It was expensive as hell back then but SO MUCH FUN!

Randomly Tagging People I Don’t Think I’ve Tagged For This Thing Before: @randommindtime (It's what you get for following me!), @yandereplumsim, @elfpuddle, @halousims, @nuttydazesublime, and @kayleigh-83. As always, feel free to ignore for whatever reason. :)

#non sims #meme #ye olde questions meme

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