#greysnowweek

[theonsource]

GREYSNOW WEEK || Prompt: Arrows

The arrow was black… but it was fletched with white duck feathers. Not mine, he told himself, not one of mine. But he felt as if it were.”

~ A STORM OF SWORDS, JON VII

[redrikki]

There’s a trend in fandom to write Theon bullying Jon and even other Stark kids on occasion. How accurate is that in terms of book canon? Where does this portrayal come from and what role does it tend to play in stories?

Book Canon

Because Jon leaves for the Wall so soon into the books, there isn’t much in the way of interaction between Jon and Theon, but there’s enough. In GoT Bran 1, Jon calls Theon an ass behind his back after he kicks a severed head. A little while later, the two of them have a perfectly civil exchange about the mother wolf. After the adults insist the wolf pups are likely to die, Theon quips how the albino is likely to die fastest. Jon responds by glaring and insisting it won’t because it belongs to him. In Jon 1, Theon ignores Jon on his bench as he walks by on the way to the high table, something Jon says is nothing new. And that’s it in terms of their on-page interactions.

After they leave Winterfell, they think of each other only occasionally. In SoS Jon 5 when Jon learns about his brother’s deaths and the sack of Winterfell he thinks that he never liked Theon, but he wouldn’t do that. In the next Jon chapter, he draws comfort during the battle for Castle Black from a quip Theon once made and admits that Theon was the better hunter.

Theon, meanwhile, describes Jon as sullen boy, quick to sense a slight, jealous of Theon’s status yet accorded more honor by the household in CoK Theon 1. In Theon 6, he considers joining the Night’s Watch, recalling that it was honorable enough for Jon Snow. In DwD Prince of Winterfell, he reminisces about sparring with Jon and Robb in the yard and soaking in the godswood pools after. In A Ghost in Winterfell, he thinks about how Jon will take his head in a heartbeat in an amused, suicidal ideation sort of way.

All told, Theon and Jon don’t like each other (Jon actually says it out right), and they both express jealousy over what they see is the other’s better treatment. Jon thinks Theon’s an ass (accurate) and Theon thinks Jon’s a sullen, prickly bastard (also accurate), yet they both respect each other and have fond memories. Neither one has any memories of Theon bullying Jon. By contrast, Jeyne bullying Arya is portrayed on the page and recalled later by both parties.

So, if there is no canonical evidence for Theon bullying Jon, where did the idea come from and why does it keep cropping up?

Where Did It Come From

Show-verse Theon is absolutely a bully. The show runners wrote brand new scenes and modified ones from the book to showcase Theon being a bully who is antagonistic to the Starks in general and Jon in particular. Take, for example, the wolf adoption scene which is altered so that Theon snaps at Robb for daring to give him an order and then insists that Jon take the runt of the litter. There’s a later scene where Theon goes out of his way to taunt Osha after she’s been taken prisoner. Show-verse Theon is a far bigger asshole than book-verse Theon and way more comfortable mouthing off to the Starks.

As it stands, book-verse Theon is a complicated and uncomfortable character. He’s an ass, the type of guy to kick a severed head at an execution. His sense of humor is dark and irreverent, even if only a fraction of it actually leaves his mouth. In his memories, he admits to deliberately trying to wind up Benfred Tallhart and Roose Bolton at various points. Where most POV characters are either monogamous or chaste, Theon is a horny as heck and treats women as disposable sex-objects. He tells himself it’s better to be seen as cruel than weak and repeatedly advices Robb towards violence. And all of that is before all the terrible things he does after taking Winterfell. For a certain segment of fans, it makes sense to project this awful behavior backwards so he was always a bad person who did bad things, like bullying.

The fanon echo chamber is also a contributing factor. There is a lot of canon to read through and, if you read enough fic, it’s easy enough to confuse it with other people’s head canons.

Where It Crops Up

Theon is rarely the focus of those stories which feature him as a bully. There are a large number of stories where Theon bullying Jon or, indeed, any of the Stark kids, and otherwise being generally unpleasant is just background radiation in a story about life in Winterfell or the Starks being awesome. Often times, bully Theon will serve as device for making other characters not normally in Winterfell like ward OCs or canon Stark antagonists more likable by contrast. In stories where the Starks are somehow winning at the game of thrones, Theon’s earlier bullying will serve as justification for a rather nasty comeuppance even though the taking of Winterfell never occurred.

In stories where Theon being a bully is the focus, the bullying is usually in the service of Jon’s character. A character being bullied builds automatic sympathy points with readers. Theon bullying Jon thus make Jon a more sympathetic character and justifies his angst. This is especially important in stories where his canonical excuses for angst, namely his bastard underdog status and Catelyn’s emotional abuse, are downplayed or removed entirely. In a modern high school AU or similar, Jon needs a bully like Theon or his character just doesn’t work.

And then there’s the undeniable spice of enemies to lovers tropes. Bully, or at least asshole rival, Theon will crop up quite a bit in Jon/Theon fic. Sometimes the plot will be Theon bullying Jon to get his attention and burn off some sexual tension. In other cases, it will be about Jon learning to see through Theon’s bravado bullshit to his tender heart bellow. Either way, the story must start with Jon hating Theon so the ending emotional payoff is that much better. Then there’s the darker fic where Theon’s bullying is a prelude to either a bdsm thing or an outright abusive romance.

There is nothing inherently wrong about writing Theon as a bully. Fanfiction is all about taking a story and making it your own, actual canon be damned. They way fandom has seemingly collectively chosen to interpret Jon and Theon’s relationship is an interesting trend.

Comment on AO3

[selkiewife]

GREYSNOW WEEK || Prompt: Legends

A Gifset inspired by Time in a Bottle by @owlsinathens

[st-clements-steps]

A Greysnow Meta

Let’s be clear this is not a ship theory, I find it very unlikely Jon and Theon will become romantically involved in canon. Someone much more interested in unravelling the textual clues of canon could surely make some interesting predictions about when and how Theon and Jon will meet again, and what state they might both be in at that point. And it would be up to each of us readers whether we wanted to read those clues as foreshadowing a romantic relationship or a platonic friendship or a strategic alliance.

Instead I am interested in the dynamic possibilities of Greysnow, what does Greysnow offer as a ship? And yes I do think a modern smut one shot can offer as much (or as little) interesting character exploration as a book quoting essay. Since shipping can be a very fun way to elaborate on any complex media, including asoiaf/GoT, the forces that would come into play in the ship can tell us a lot about Theon, Jon and our own fan responses.

(This mainly a book discussion but it does discuss the show a little)

Enemies to Lovers

My feelings on this trope are a subjective thing, I know that, but the twist from anger into passion can be a very compelling one and it works with Greysnow twice over. 

As adolescents growing up together we know they have a mutual dislike: 

Theon ignored him utterly, but there was nothing new in that. Jon I AGOT

The bastard was a sullen boy, quick to sense a slight, jealous of Theon's high birth Theon I ACOK

And here can’t we read how put out they each are but by what they perceive as the other’s disregard for them? They don’t like the other and yet there is an underlying sense they wanted to be noticed, or not to be treated with sullen disdain. This is Enemies to Lovers in the fun, frisson filled state that most fanfic (and romance readers) expect of it. The romantic and sexual tension offers a myriad of possibilities.

Of course there is also a much more violent Enemies to Lovers possibility with Greysnow, Theon sees it:

Jon would take his head off in a heartbeat. A Ghost in Winterfell (ADWD)

It's a possibility in which Theon immediately confronts the reader with the way Ramsay has been set up to mirror Jon:

Plucked from the clutches of one bastard to die at the hands of another, what a jape. A Ghost in Winterfell (ADWD)

And so the Enemies to Lovers trope can offer, the shippers, the writers, the hopers, something much more complex than frisson, if that’s the road they want to take. Canon offers it up to us, we can explore Theon’s abuse at the hands of one bastard by imagining the relationship he would form with the bastard central to the text. We can explore Jon’s relationship to his birth status by viewing him through the prism of someone who has experienced a man who lives up to the very worst of Westeros’ rhetoric against baseborn children.

Misunderstandings

Misunderstandings and their resolution make a story go round, they are a fundamental part of all the best stories. And Enemies to Lovers offers misunderstanding inherently as part of its dynamic, we can see that immediately in the quotes above. The hint they don’t want to be at odds, the narrow picture they have each assumed of the other. 

And yet there is also the opposite misunderstanding, Theon believes Jon would take his head, Jon thinks:

They [Bran and Rickon] can't be dead. Theon would never do that. Jon VI (ASOS)

Whether he still believes this, come The Winds of Winter, well who knows? That’s the possibility the writer can play with, the shipper can daydream about, because there are so many different misunderstanding paths to wander off down, Jon, awakened from the dead, may not remember his previous animosity towards Theon, or he might demand the right to execute Theon himself, they may need to unravel together the mysterious intervention of the weirwood tree, or the complexities of having your own name take from you?

In a world where everyone’s identity is a slippery thing, like a flipped coin, Theon and Jon unravelling the misunderstandings of canon, either at odds or in tandem could be so interesting.

An exploration of Jon’s canonical attraction to men

Jon thinks of male characters in ways that read like he finds them attractive. GRRM may never explore this, and maybe he does not intend it, with Jaime it could be a platonic admiration I suppose:

Jon found it hard to look away from him. This is what a king should look like, he thought to himself as the man passed. Jon I (AGOT)

Try and convince me that you can dismiss his description of Satin in the same way though:

He was pretty as a girl with his dark eyes, soft skin, and raven's ringlets. Jon VII (ASOS)

And yes you could explore this attraction through writing Jon x Satin, or any number of Jon x male character ships but….

An mlm ship that explores 2 POV characters

The asoiaf (and GoT) fandom is oddly heterosexual (we have to discount HOTD here, where everything gets much more queer). I say oddly because most other fandoms appear to be much more about mlm shipping than anything else.

The five biggest mlm ships in asoiaf/GoT are all ships which include at least one non-POV character. Of course most of them are tagged with both show and book so perhaps this doesn’t matter? But as a writer, writing a character is much easier if they have a voice you can explore first. Even with show-only fics it is undeniable that the POV characters who survived to season 8 have a lot more screen time. I love side characters, even a few who are only graced with a few lines, but as a reader I can’t deny that my conception of a non-POV character could be wildly different to someone else’s. Even when someone is a thoughtful, considered writer, who has clearly used canon to build their characters. 

If you’re writing considered fanfic the foundations of writing a POV character are so much stronger. And they offer so much more opportunity to reflect on the text, to comment on and discuss canon in a way that can be gentler and much less hostile than a lot of meta ends up being.

An exploration of Theon’s complex sexuality

Interestingly despite my above analysis on Jon’s sexuality it is Theon who features in the 2 most tagged mlm relationships in asoiaf/GoT. And yes here show dynamics clearly have some influence because actually Theon’s sexuality is strangely more elusive than Jon’s despite his greater apparent interest in actual sex. 

In my mind Theon never appears to express attraction unless the other person has already clearly shown an interest (or fucked him). What he seems to like is to be wanted. 

And so he flirts. It is Cat who tells us this time and again, describes his easy confidence and his cocky smile, his vault to lift her from the boat, tells us of him:

Enjoying a horn of ale and regaling her father's garrison with an account of the slaughter in the Whispering Wood. Catelyn XI (AGOT)

Theon plays down his attachment to everyone, Patrek is not too ill a fellow, and it is only when he gives the reader the tiniest hint of the liaison with a miller’s wife (so many miller’s wives, so little time) that we hear something softer:

Would that Patrek were with me now. Theon I (ACOK)

And yet despite Theon’s ambiguity, or perhaps because of it, people are drawn to ship him in mlm relationships. 

And of course Greysnow offers the possibility that a simple cocky smile does not always work, the possibility of exploring how Theon copes when he is not overtly wanted? When the other person is as good at concealing his emotions as Theon himself is in many ways.

No one is quite what they appear in asoiaf, literally, they have identities that are taken from them, they are concealed, to abuse them on occasion, to protect them in other instances. What is more, as we get under the skin of every POV character, we see the ways in which those around them are misreading their true feelings, the ways they are dissembling to meet society’s expectations. And Greysnow is a lovely ship for peeling back the tricksiness of identity, the secrets both Jon and Theon are keeping and exposing the truths of both their characters.

[owlsinathens]

"Mayhaps, in the end we'll save each other."

Art commissioned to celebrate Greysnow Week 2023 from JurelaDigital on Reddit

Artist's website

[theonsource]

Theon would have laughed aloud if he'd remembered how.

GREYSNOW WEEK || Free Choice, Theon & Jon reunite in The Winds of Winter

[selkiewife]

If he was remembered at all

An Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind / Reincarnation AU for Greysnow Week

Prompts: Valentine's Day (only it's Moonmaid's Day in this), Soulmate Reincarnation AU, Crossover AU, The Language of Flowers, “if he was remembered at all,” and Role Swap AU.

[selkiewife]

GREYSNOW WEEK: Prompt: Secret Stolen Kisses

Every kiss Jon shares with Theon feels stolen. Just as every breath he takes and every crown they place upon his head feels like a stolen breath, a stolen crown. For the truth is that all of it- the crown, the castle, and Theon’s lips opening so feverishly beneath his- belong to Robb. Jon closes his eyes and wonders if this is how his father felt when he took his brother’s lady for his own. A combination of exquisite guilt and crushing happiness.

When Theon’s sister tries to call him home, he asks him not to go. Jon feels guilt about it- but not enough. The guilt of stealing Theon is growing easier to bear. He remembers Ygritte and wonders what she would think of him, so shamelessly stealing his love from his home. Would she be proud or offer him her curse?

And gods help him, he should be cursed. After all, the shame that sears Theon makes him wish he could trade his life for Robb's. But Jon’s shame is that he wouldn’t trade Theon’s life for anyone… not anyone. So he keeps his terrible secret that despite the devastating price, he would never sacrifice these stolen kisses.

[theonsource]

GREYSNOW WEEK IS COMING!

We are thrilled to announce that we are hosting the first ever Greysnow Week (Jon x Theon) with @jonsnow-creative from February 13- 20, 2023. We hope you will join us in sharing your visions, art, edits, gifs, fics and creations for this ship under the tag #greysnowweek during the week of Valentine's Day!

Prompts under the cut:

Day 1: Role Swap AU | Secret Kisses | "If he was remembered at all..." 

Day 2: Forced Proximity AU | Arrows | "Dares not speak his true name" 

Day 3: PWP AU | Ancient Rituals | "You don't have to choose" 

Day 4: Blind Date AU | Letters/Ravens | "This is my place" 

Day 5: Love at First S(word f)ight AU | Gloves | "The runt of the litter" 

Day 6: Crossover AU | Legends | "Theon would never do that" 

Day 7: Soulmate AU | The Language of Flowers | "A Stark at last"

ANY DAY: Valentine’s Day! | Free Choice | If you are Ironborn, a member of the Free Folk, or a secret Targaryen, you can “Pay the Iron Price” / “Steal your Love” / "Dracarys" and do whatever you want!

We are excited to see your creations whether they are inspired by book canon, show canon, or an amalgamation of both! If you are writing fic, please feel free to post to the Greysnow Week Collection on AO3. And please tag all of your fanwork with #greysnowweek so that the hosts can find your posts and reblog. We also appreciate if you tag either of our blogs!

*artwork by @shebsart *edit by @owlsinathens

[theonsource]

Reminder that the first ever GREYSNOW WEEK is coming February 13-20! Here is a link to the original post where you will find more information and a list of prompts for this event!

Day 1: Role Swap AU | Secret Kisses | "If he was remembered at all..." 

Day 2: Forced Proximity AU | Arrows | "Dares not speak his true name" 

Day 3: PWP AU | Ancient Rituals | "You don't have to choose" 

Day 4: Blind Date AU | Letters/Ravens | "This is my place" 

Day 5: Love at First S(word f)ight AU | Gloves | "The runt of the litter" 

Day 6: Crossover AU | Legends | "Theon would never do that" 

Day 7: Soulmate AU | The Language of Flowers | "A Stark at last"

ANY DAY: Valentine’s Day! | Free Choice | If you are Ironborn, a member of the Free Folk, or a secret Targaryen, you can “Pay the Iron Price” / “Steal your Love” / "Dracarys" and do whatever you want!

We are excited to see your creations whether they are inspired by book canon, show canon, or an amalgamation of both! If you are writing fic, please feel free to post to the Greysnow Week Collection on AO3. And please tag all of your fanwork with #greysnowweek so that the hosts can find your posts and reblog. We also appreciate if you tag either of our blogs!

[selkiewife]

Reminder that the first ever GREYSNOW WEEK is coming February 13-20! Here is a link to the original post where you will find more information and a list of prompts for this event!

Day 1: Role Swap AU | Secret Kisses | "If he was remembered at all..." 

Day 2: Forced Proximity AU | Arrows | "Dares not speak his true name" 

Day 3: PWP AU | Ancient Rituals | "You don't have to choose" 

Day 4: Blind Date AU | Letters/Ravens | "This is my place" 

Day 5: Love at First S(word f)ight AU | Gloves | "The runt of the litter" 

Day 6: Crossover AU | Legends | "Theon would never do that" 

Day 7: Soulmate AU | The Language of Flowers | "A Stark at last"

ANY DAY: Valentine’s Day! | Free Choice | If you are Ironborn, a member of the Free Folk, or a secret Targaryen, you can “Pay the Iron Price” / “Steal your Love” / "Dracarys" and do whatever you want!

We are excited to see your creations whether they are inspired by book canon, show canon, or an amalgamation of both! If you are writing fic, please feel free to post to the Greysnow Week Collection on AO3. And please tag all of your fanwork with #greysnowweek so that the hosts can find your posts and reblog. We also appreciate if you tag either of our blogs!

[theonsource]

*Gif was made with art by @shebsart​

HAPPY GREYSNOW WEEK!

Greysnow Week begins today (Feb 13) and will conclude on Feb 20. Any and all types of fanworks are accepted for this event. We welcome both romantic and platonic Greysnow (as long as the focus is on their relationship.) We also welcome book canon, show canon and combinations of both. The prompts are just suggestions- basically anything goes. There are also 8 days of Greysnow Week because Greysnows don’t know how to count we paid the iron price for the last day! Remember to tag your posts #greysnowweek so that the admins of of @jonsnow-creative and @theonsource can find and reblog your work and if you are writing fic, please feel free to post to the Greysnow Week Collection on AO3. We can't wait to see your creations! Prompts under the cut:

Day 1:  Role Swap AU | Secret Kisses | "If he was remembered at all..."

Day 2:  Forced Proximity AU | Arrows | "Dares not speak his true name"

Day 3:  PWP AU | Ancient Rituals | "You don't have to choose"

Day 4:  Blind Date AU | Letters/Ravens | "This is my place"

Day 5:  Love at First S(word f)ight AU | Gloves | "The runt of the litter"

Day 6: Crossover AU | Legends | "Theon would never do that"

Day 7:  Soulmate AU | The Language of Flowers | "A Stark at last"

ANY DAY: Valentine’s Day! | Free Choice | If you are Ironborn, a member of the Free Folk, or a secret Targaryen, you can “Pay the Iron Price” / “Steal your Love” / "Dracarys" and do whatever you want!

[st-clements-steps]

abide with you

Jon x Theon, 8000 words, E

Sitting on the church’s step was Robb’s cousin Jon, Father Jon, Theon supposed. He looked like an old fashioned photograph, fingers pressed to his pretty lips, the clerical collar snug at his neck, a curl catching it, the wisp of smoke.

[owlsinathens]

To the Sea

The sea is rough as the wind in my hair,

and the sunshine falls on my face.

Spring has come, and the cold to an end,

and I to this strange place.

The waves I know, the cry of a gull,

the smell of heather and salt.

So far from home and yet still the same,

know nothing of my fault.

A lonely place and a lonely heart,

my true love lost to me.

I wander the cliffs and look at the sea,

and whisper my silent plea.

Just one, oh! one more time,

let me hold him in my arms.

Just one last time hear him speak my name,

and shield him from all harms.

Alas, I say the words in vain,

to the God of the waves and the sea,

for my boy, my sweet, my precious love,

has died so far from me.

The skies are dark when I spy him first,

Standing at the edge of the cliff.

His face turned away and towards the sea,

his figure forlorn and stiff.

At my approach he turns his head,

He pushes his hood aside.

I look into the stranger’s eyes,

and see a pain he cannot hide.

Who are you, friend? What brings you here?

And might I know your name?

I ask, my hand reaching out to him,

Your pain and mine are the same.

My name, he sighs, what of my name?

I don't have that to claim.

My name is not mine and it never was,

so we are not the same.

I once loved a man, so many years past,

But my soul has since turned black.

For I lost my love, now I pray to the sea,

for the sea to give him back.

Was he a seaman, the love that you lost?

I ask the stranger apace.

For I once sailed the seas, through tempest and storm,

I might erst have seen his face.

A seaman, an archer, a jester, a rake,

dressed in velvet and lace.

And so much more was my love that I lost,

Yet I don’t remember his face.

The stranger smiles, he turns away,

his gaze once more to the sea.

We stand in silence, watching the waves,

a measure of peace in me.

What is your story? the stranger asks,

and what is your lover’s name?

I travelled the world both north and south,

I might just have seen the same.

I bow my head, avoid his gaze,

I seek to hide my shame.

For my story, my life, my love that is lost,

I am the one to blame.

He was good, I tell him, and a beauty too,

his hair like the wings of a crow.

His eyes like the sky on a rainy day,

lost such a long time ago.

He died, my love, from a knife to his heart,

betrayed by his brothers, his kin.

And I was not there to protect him from this,

another grievous sin.

The stranger places his hand on his heart,

a tear rolling down his cheek.

I reach for his hand and hold it in mine,

not knowing what to speak.

My love, he says, he was beautiful too,

dressed in gold and black.

His hair was dark and his eyes like the sea,

the sea that won’t give him back.

My hand, it trembles in his hold,

my heart is in my throat.

Though my hair is now white and my face is gaunt,

I still wear my black and gold coat.

He looks to me with tears in his eyes,

his eyes as grey as the sky.

His face is a stranger’s and yet the same,

despite all the years gone by.

We remain there, together, my heart in his hands,

until the skies have turned black.

And I hear him whispering, he smiles at the sea.

Thank you for giving him back.

Thank you @st-clements-steps and @ferrame for your help and encouragement!

[theonsource]

Greysnow Week is only a week away!!!

We’ve also created a discord to keep the party going after Greysnow Week ends!

Here is the invite for the Greysnow Discord!

*Edit by @owlsinathens

[selkiewife]

This is My Place (A Greysnow Playlist)

Greysnow Week || Prompt: “This is my place.”

Black Eye by Uncle Tupelo

He had a black eye he was proud of Like some of his friends Made him feel somewhere outside Of everything and everywhere he'd been

Like his brothers, he emptied himself And played it safe Like their father, he wanted to remember But he almost always forgot what he was gonna say

When he realized that this one Was here to stay He took down all the mirrors in the hallway And thought only of his younger face

Black eye Black eye

Vanity by The Avett Brothers 

I've got something to say But it's all vanity, it's all vanity I've got love pouring out of my veins But it's all vanity, it's all vanity

Call off the guards Call off the search Their heads are chopped off They're running in circles They're running in circles Running in circles They're running in circles

The Kid by Ben Nichols

Your mother died the night you were born Her name you never knew Look away, look away Nothing to lose

You saw the lancers mid heathen hordes Bloodstained veils and costumes of war Hell ain't half full boy hear me War is the game and the god we seek

Kid don't you know me? We are the last of the true Drink up! Drink up! Drink up! Drink up! Cause tonight your soul's required of you

But you stood witness to yourself Our trial you did betray Look away, look away To judgment day

Hurt by Nine Inch Nails

I wear this crown of shit Upon my liar's chair Full of broken thoughts I cannot repair Beneath the stains of time The feelings disappear You are someone else I am still right here

What have I become? My sweetest friend Everyone I know Goes away in the end And you could have it all My empire of dirt I will let you down I will make you hurt

If I could start again A million miles away I would keep myself I would find a way

Hengilás by Jónsi 

We look into foreign eyes Yet we have always known each other We passed away under a watchful eye Now we stand hesitantly

Black Bird cover by Evan Rachel Wood

Black bird singing in the dead of night Take these broken wings and learn to fly All your life You were only waiting for this moment to arise

Black bird singing in the dead of night Take these sunken eyes and learn to see All your life You were only waiting for this moment to be free

The Boxer (Live) by Simon & Garfunkel

In the clearing stands a boxer And a fighter by his trade And he carries the reminders Of every glove that laid him down Or cut him till he cried out in his anger and his shame "I am leaving, I am leaving", but the fighter still remains

Half a World Away by R.E.M.

The storm it came up strong It shook the trees and blew away our fear I couldn't leave it here To go it alone, hold it along Haul it along and hold it Blackbirds, backwards, forwards and fall Hold

Oh, this could be the saddest dusk I've ever seen Turn to a miracle, high-alive My mind is racing, as it always will My hands tired, my heart aches I'm half a world away to go

The Last Pale Light in the West by Ben Nichols

In my hands, I hold the ashes  In my veins, black pitch runs  In my chest, a fire catches  In my way, the setting sun

Dark clouds gather 'round me  Due northwest, the soul is bound  And I will go, on ahead free  There's a light yet to be found 

The last pale light in the west  The last pale light in the west 

And I ask for no redemption  In this cold and barren place  Still I see a faint reflection  And so by it, I got my way

Holland Road by Mumford & Sons

So I was lost, go count the cost Before you go to the Holland Road With your heart like a stone you spared no time in lashing out And I knew your pain and the effect of my shame But you cut me down, you cut me down

And I will not tell the thoughts of hell That carried me home from the Holland Road With my heart like a stone and I put up no fight To your calloused mind, and from your corner you rose To cut me down, you cut me down

So I hit my low, but little did I know That would not be the end From the Holland Road Well I rose and I rose and I paid less time To your calloused mind, and I wished you well As you cut me down, you cut me down

But I still believe though these cracks you'll see When I'm on my knees I'll still believe And when I've hit the ground, neither lost nor found If you believe in me I'll still believe

The Wren cover by Sarah Stockwell-Arthen

What could ever drive a man To venture out in all this cold? What could ever be the dream upon his mind Or the voice he heard coming singing through the snow?

A flock of birds must crown a king Against the wind and under wing And never notice when the one in front he falls And another takes his place to gather all

Singing down, down, bless this soul Singing down, down, this I know Singing down, down, down, down, hear the voices blend Though those who stand behind will not defend The wren

Incomplete and Insecure by The Avett Brothers

I haven't finished a thing since I started my life I don't feel much like starting now Walking down lonely has worked like a charm I'm the only one I have to let down

But watching you makes me think that that is wrong

I can go on with my insecure nature I can keep living on sympathy I can tell all the people that all of the success is a direct reflection on me

But watching you makes me think that that is wrong

What is important What's really important Am I not to know by my name Will I ever know silence without mental violence Will the ringing at night go away

It's up to you My father called on me

Nothingman by Pearl Jam

Once divided, nothing left to subtract Some words when spoken can't be taken back Walks on his own with thoughts he can't help thinking Future's above, but in the past he's slow and sinking

And he who forgets Will be destined to remember

Nothingman, nothingman Could have been something, nothingman

Nightswimming by R.E.M.

Nightswimming deserves a quiet night I'm not sure all these people understand It's not like years ago The fear of getting caught The recklessness in water They cannot see me naked These things they go away Replaced by every day

Nightswimming, remembering that night September's coming soon I'm pining for the moon And what if there were two Side by side in orbit around the fairest sun? The bright tide forever drawn Could not describe nightswimming

You, I thought I knew you You, I cannot judge You, I thought you knew me This one laughing quietly Underneath my breath Nightswimming deserves a quiet night

All My Mistakes

Shooting off vicious collections of words The losers make facts by the things they have heard And I find myself trying hard to defend them

I made decisions some right and some wrong And I let some love go I wish wasn't gone These things and more I wish I had not done

But I can't go back And I don't want to 'Cause all my mistakes They brought me to you

Mr. Tambourine Man by Bob Dylan

And take me disappearing through the smoke rings of my mind Down the foggy ruins of time, far past the frozen leaves The haunted, frightened trees, out to the windy beach Far from the twisted reach of crazy sorrow Yes, to dance beneath the diamond sky with one hand waving free Silhouetted by the sea, circled by the circus sands With all memory and fate driven deep beneath the waves Let me forget about today until tomorrow