#guys.. i am so emotional about brotherly prinxiety this week

[babysizedfics]

I HC that big Vee still likes to be put to bed. Not like bedtime story etc, but occasionally he will go to one of the CGs (or even Ro sometimes) and be like "im heading to bed" very deliberately, trying to get someone to come with him, or he'll curl up on the couch and start someone off on a long speech about something, just so he can fall asleep and its like he isn't alone, but he doesn't quite realize that being babied to sleep when he's little is the reason till one of the cgs points it out

I have been thinking about this All Day while i packed so i have a lot of things to say abt this - this is a VERY long post so be prepared shhshs

firstly: ADORABLE THANK U

i rlly do think this is in character! because adult virge actually has a lot of trouble with sleep - he has nightmares most nights and we've obviously established that he wets the bed a lot. both of these things tend to wake him up only a few hours into the night and he's not always willing to sleep again afterwards (to avoid nightmares and wet sheets)

on top of that he (used to) struggle with getting himself to bed on time, he would stay up into the early hours indulging in special interests, stimming where he hid it during the day, or being little (when it was still hidden from everyone) and this has all messed up his body clock quite a lot so some nights he just can't get himself to sleep - this is why he's so sleepy during the days

Also i think he just likes being around people, it calms his anxiety because he doesnt worry about whether anyone is hurt or anything because he can see/feel them around him - so im sure after so many nights being babied to sleep by his CGs and getting so used to having someone with him to fall asleep he subconsciously seeks it out when he's big

also while we are on the subject, adult virgil has a very specific bedtime routine! this is me projecting again but he NEEDS to do every part of it otherwise he feels really stressed and upset and gets anxious and that makes it even harder to sleep - his routine is calling roman a nickname until roman calls him one back, saying 'Night L' to which logan has to reply 'Good night, Virgil.' (if logan replies differently virgil keeps subtly trying to postpone bedtime and repeating 'night L' until logan says it exactly right), and having a hug with patton - patton is the most reliable because every time without a doubt he sways them side to side, squeezes virgils shoulders, kisses his head and whispers 'i love you stormcloud' and virgil always replies 'love you dad' while avoiding his eyes. This routine has been in place since before the regression is revealed i think

ugh the fact that virgil finishes everyday by hugging patton is so cute already but also i said that he also starts off everyday by hugging patton too and thats just ADORABLE

now with actually asking for people to put him to bed, it will be different with each person:

with logan, as you suggested, i think he would get logan to talk about something academic that interests him or maybe even - much more rarely - shyly ask logan if he could read the book in his hands out loud. Logan of course understands that virgil does these things when he's getting tired and is happy to do so to help virgil relax before bed. It helps him relax too

with patton virgil is the most obvious - he knows theres no point hiding it from him and he just outright asks if patton can please help him fall asleep. though I think he would actually be most reluctant to seek out patton, ironically, merely because he knows that patton picks up on it and has no qualms with pointing out that virgil clearly loves bedtime and 'of course i can tuck you in kiddo! Do you want me to stroke your hair? Do you want your paci? Shall i sing to you sweetie?'

So virgil mainly kind of avoids getting patton to put him to bed when he's grownup because pattons instinct is to just treat him like a baby - which virgil appreciates of course but some nights he actually wants to stay big and its kind of impossible to do that when patton is humming a lullaby and rocking virgil in his lap

with roman its a very different story - virgil will only ever seek roman out if both CGs are already in bed, which brings me onto a HC that I've been meaning to tell you guys about for WEEKS:

roman and virgil often have 'sleepovers' - theyre really just all-nighters where both of them have trouble sleeping and instead of suffer alone they go into romans room and chill together for the night

they keep this a secret from the CGs mainly because they're sure patton and logan would both have something to say about the fact that at least once a week virgil and roman completey forego sleep and instead eat snacks and watch disney and play video games and shove pillows into their faces to try not to wake the others with their sleep deprived laughter

but also? its just become special to them and they want to keep it as Their Thing

you see virgil isnt the only one who struggles with sleeping - roman tends to stay up very late working on creative projects (even if the CGs put him to bed he will usually get up again because he cant get his brain to switch off) and he won't admit it, at least not for a while, but he actually has a slight fear of sleep

the fact that you are unaware of what goes on around you and are not in control of your body or mind while you are unconscious just doesn't sit right with roman, if he thinks about it too hard he starts freaking out and purposefully avoids sleeping - thought he doesnt tend to think about it too much, he's learned to ignore these thoughts since when he was a teen they led to a pretty bad case of insomnia

so vee and ro tend to be awake late at night and often one will text 'you up?' and within a minute virgil will be sneaking into roman's room to keep each other company

this is where i think most of their adult brotherly bonding happens, its quiet since they dont want to wake up pat or lo and it's a calm atmosphere because of roman's constellation nightlight and the whole vibe of it just makes them a lot more open and soft with each other

they tend to end up talking about Big Life Things on most nights

as they play minecraft one night virgil opens up about his internalised ableism and how no matter how much everyone assures him its okay to need extra help he still feels awful about it and roman doesn't say much, he just listens, but when he notices virgil getting choked up at one point he pauses the game and silently pushes his teddy bear aladdin into virgils hands and pulls him in with one arm to lean against his shoulder

another night they are lying on romans bed, side by side but with some distance between them, and staring up at the projected constellations, talking about how cool it is that logan and patton take care of them and roman blurts out that sometimes he feels a bit scared of logan and thinks he will tell him off for being stupid and force him not to be virgils brother anymore because he cant be trusted.

they dont look at each other, they keep staring at the stars as roman rambles, supplemented by lots of sarcastic comments and jokes and nervous laughter to hide the fact that his voice is shaking. And again, virgil doesnt say much, he doesnt interrupt roman and they both know that they feel comfy opening up to each other on these nights because theres a silent agreement that they dont discuss it, it's just a venting session, no advice or sympathy please.

but virgil does shuffle closer on the bed and presses their shoulders together, and he does take romans hand gently when roman starts picking at his nails

so yeah.. virgil seeks the CGs out when he wants to sleep, but its not so bad when he can't sleep either because he'll aways have roman too

[davidthetraveler]

David’s Fic-Rec Friday:  2020/03/27

Hey guys.  Sorry about last week.  With this quarantine in place, I’m having to share the internet with my mother, who has to do all her assistance principal-ing from home now.  But we’ve managed to figure out a setup that will let her have the signal strength she needs and will still let me have access.

Of course,that didn’t stop my brother and sister-in-law on insisting we come over for dinner, thus resulting in this getting put out so late tonight, but what can you do?

Anyway, let’s get to this new batch of stories.

Blank - Royality Oneshot by And_There_They_Go_Again (aka @logan-sanders-enthusiast )

To start things off, we’ve got a Royality soulmate AU that starts out angsty but ends on a much brighter note.  Everyone knows that at the stroke of midnight on your sixteenth birthday, the first words that your soulmate will say to you appear on your wrist.  Roman and Remus are so psyched to receive their words, but only Remus’ appear.  Roman’s wrist is left blank.  Years later, all the pent up anger and frustration about the pity everyone shows him for not having a soulmate bursts out of him at his college roommate Logan, after which Roman storms out of their dorm in a rage.

But everything changes when he accidentally bumps into another student, causing them to spill their books and papers on the ground.  Roman quickly apologizes and starts to gather up their things.  But when he returns everything to them, they reply with sign language.  Roman starts signing back, but then catches sight of the other boy (Patton)’s wrist, where the apology he just blurted out is written.

This story does mention some darker concepts, including self harm, rampant swearing, and both Remus and Deceit, though the latter is only mentioned and the former is sympathetic.  But other than that, it’s all good and absolutely worth your time.

Anything Goes by LetHimBeCaesar (No Tumblr Account)

And now for some pre-relationship Logince.  Logan has been taken into the imagination by Roman so as to acquire some dandelion greens for a project.  In response, Roman has conjured up an entire field of dandelions, whose seeds are swirling and alighting all around them.  One in particular, still intact, lands in Roman’s hair where Logan pulls it out.  And at Roman’s prompting he makes a wish.  It all might seem so superfluous and pointless, but it is the imagination.  And in the imagination, anything goes, including the idea of him and Roman together, which the prince might be wishing for just as much as himself.  Soft and simple, and oh so magical.

Two Cute Dorks in Love by PanicAtTheEverywhere (aka @muffin-arts )

Now here we’ve got some soft Moxiety for the soul, though there’s also some background LAMP.  Patton can’t seem to find his cat hoodie, and after asking Logan and Roman with little success, he heads off to ask Virgil.  But what he finds is Virgil wearing said hoodie and looking more content than Patton’s ever seen him.  Happy to oblige with some swapping, Patton pulls on Virgil’s own hoodie, and the share a tender kiss as they express just how much they love each other.  Wonderfully sweet, and with the image of some soft boys in comfy sweaters to sweeten the pot, you can’t go wrong with this one.

Professional Spirit Chasers by chemically_imbalanced_romance (aka @soft-stormcloud)

Now this one, I should warn you, does deal with some darker material, and could be problematic for some people, so do be careful and heed the warnings.

Logan and Virgil are an engaged couple who work as Professional Spirit Chasers (title drop).  With their new camera man Roman, they’re trying to remove the spirit of a young man named Patton from a recently purchased house who died several years before at his own hands.  Virgil, who is a medium, manages to talk him into coming to live with them so he’s not alone anymore.  And Patton, under their adoptive care, begins to finally start healing from the pain his life, and death, have caused him.

Obviously this story features a dead major character, references to suicide and depression, some description of injuries, and supernatural elements.  But if you can get through all that, then this story is definitely worth a look-see.

The Castle by shnuffeluv (aka @sanderssidesfanfiction)

A short drabble featuring the creativitwins.  Remus has just finished building a cardboard castle for Roman, and Roman is delighted at what his regressed brother has made for him, and invites him to join him inside for some classic Disney movies.  This story does mention blood, and features both Sympathetic Remus and Age Regression.  But is otherwise wonderfully wholesome, as all best brotherly stories are.

Fluffuary 3 - Logince by vicdehart (aka @vicdehart )

Now for some cliche romance, courtesy of our resident Nerd and Prince coupling in another human AU.  Roman’s bummed out about the rain preventing them from having their preplanned date outside.  But Logan’s not about to let a little weather get his love down, and channels a little cliche romance for some dancing in the rain with his prince.  Fluffy and hearfelt in every way you can think of, this thing will rot your teeth out if you don’t die of a sugar high first.

Platonic Ideal by pickledragon (aka @learningthomas)

And here we have a platonic Moxiety human AU for all your familial love needs.  Patton comes home from work to his shared place with Virgil.  After stewing in his thoughts for a bit, he brings up the subject of adoption with Virgil, who wholeheartedly agrees, reminding him that he is ready and happy to co-parent with him.  The author expressly describes their relationship as platonic, but there’s room to interpret it romantically or queerplatonically.  Either way, it’s wonderful and heartwarming in all the right ways.

A Lovely Night by The_Fangirl_Sunstorm (aka @the-fangirl-sunstorm )

I am such a sucker for Prinxiety mutual pining get together stories.  It’s a wonder they don’t show up more often on these lists.  Anyway, Virgil is, rather reluctantly, taking part in this week’s bonding activity with the other light sides.  Namely, karaoke in Roman’s room.  Virgil gets forced into a duet with Roman, and picks “A Lovely Night” from La La Land, as a clever way to express some of his own unspoken feelings for his duet partner.  Afterward, overcome with these emotions, he excuses himself to recover from the overwhelming thoughts of his unrequited feelings, only for Roman to come check on him and reveal those feelings aren’t quite so unrequited.  Such a perfect use of a lovely concept.

Tangled In You by MagpieMorality (aka @magpiemorality )

For our last entry, we’re looking at a Logince college AU that hits rather close to home for me (wow, awful lot of Logince stories in this one, eh?)  Roman comes back to the dorm shortly after Logan does, and Logan offers to comb through Roman’s long tangled locks to work out the kinks and straighten it out.  Which leaves Roman a very soft gay mess in his lap.  Simple but oh so wonderfully sweet, this one’s exactly what I wish my partner would do for me.  You know, if/when I have long hair again, and if I ever find a partner.

*****

And this week’s Featured Fic Writer is:

Panic_at_the_everywhere (aka @panicattheeverywheremcr)

This German writer has a most excellent talent for writing, and her story Broken, while still in progress, is a wonderful tale deserving of some love and attention.  She’s definitely worthy of your time.

*****

Well that’s it for this week.  Be sure to give each of these stories and authors some love and affection with some kudos, some comments, and maybe even some bookmarks.  And if you’d like to see previous weeks’ recommendations, or learn more about the Fic-Rec Friday Project, you can find all that stuff here on my Fic-Rec Friday Masterpost.

Also, I’m still accepting suggestions for Featured Fic Writers and other stories to recommend.  There are no requirements for writers, though it would be preferred that they be lesser known authors.

Finally, if you’d like to be added to my Fic-Rec Friday Tag List, or if you’re on the list and would like to be removed, just let me know and I’ll take care of it.

Stay safe everybody, and happy reading!

General Tag List:

@ultimate-queen-of-fandoms2 @panicattheeverywheremcr

Fic-Rec Friday Tag List:

@kunnuglegur-tortimandi @max-is-tired @creativity-killed-thekitten

[romanssippycup]

Surgery: Part 3

Hey guys guess what? More Logan Angst! :}

Taglist:  @what-even-is-thiss @cup-of-blue@leesacrakon @ts-sideblog @storytellerofuntoldlegends @anonymous-snake@prinxietys @dolphin-squirrel @evilmuffin @fancifulfox @the-prince-and-the-emo @organizeddiscord @pantton-sandacers@thagrinbery @here-to-vent@justanotherpurplebutterfly@romananalogicality @prplzorua @logan-logic@toxicsanders@remmythepegasis  @ukucanuck @gracefullyinsanedancingunicorn @toebeans-andsocks @fandomsofrandom @satisfied-sanders-sides @asexual-trashbag @loonierlovegood @softbludemon @galizy @i-am-a-fander @the-laarmy @thestrangest-of-them-all @colie7700 @protecterofalltheaus @fandomsandanythingelse @mewsicalmiss @silly-aesthetic-me @pasteries-and-portugal @fandomsandnonsense7 @irish-newzealand-idian-dutch

(Let me know if you want to be tagged! :D )  Part 1 -- Part 2 “Though love may have begun with emotions, it is only truly ignited by a choice.” ---------------------------------------------

Virgil shakily passed the book to the shot-eyed side clinging onto him. It wasn’t that he wanted to stop reading, but his voice had given out. Shocked from the reality of the situation, he had no choice but to hand it off. Perhaps Roman would have been a better choice, but Patton had already grasped the book in his hands, stroking the loose pages with long ungiven affection. Hiccupping and sobbing between paragraphs, the moral side began to read.

Wednesday. Six days before Thomas’s Surgery:

It is approximately six o’clock in the afternoon. I had been meaning to write this morning about my thoughts, but quite honestly what I have experienced up until now would be more beneficial to the reader than what I had intended to write earlier. Today was a blur, so to speak. Meaning it went by too fast for me to get an accurate grasp on all that happened. So, I will continue to use this journal to sort my thoughts at the end of each day and hopefully bring a better understanding to how Thomas should process this whole ordeal, if there even is a right way to process an end to something.

It was an idea that jolted me awake two hours before my usual alarm clock. I had been trying to comprehend ways to cope with preordained passing the night before, but somehow the thought must have stuck with me. Realizing that perhaps the thought might be troubling Virgil as well for reasons he might not understand, I decided to research the matter instead of falling back asleep. That way if he had questions, I could give them a reasonable response instead of the truth.

What I found were many ways to ignore or distract oneself from the idea that time was quickly passing, but most of these did not involve my intervention or help. They involved Roman and Patton galavanting on all their own hopes and dreams without any developed reasoning. I had decided this was not what Thomas needed, but as the day continued on I began to have second thoughts.

I’d say I started second-guessing my thoughts right about when Joan and Talyn drove Thomas to get ice cream so they could talk and plan out what to do for each day of the week until next tuesday. They made sure not to mention the reason why they were planning a week full of ‘fun’ activities, but I can explicitly recall Patton and Roman not really caring as to why we were doing this. At the beginning I began to protest each idea with varying facts about Thomas’s well-being and schedule when some very real facts began to hit me.

I do not remember when I went silent, or when I lowered my head. Or for how long Virgil had been raising his voice at me to get my attention. The weight of the realization had all dumped on my shoulders at once. Thomas did not have a schedule anymore nor could he post anymore videos until his farewell announcement. His well-being was already drastically changing and it seemed I had already become obsolete in my known function. The confusion I felt and am still feeling looms over me even as I write...

As I had mentioned earlier, Virgil was the only one to notice my horrified state. I barely remember his words, but I do remember his panicked face in front of mine. It was at that moment that I realized there was no real logical solution to what was going to transpire in six days. I felt unable to open my mouth to comfort him, because the only thing on my tongue was the truth. The facts of the real situation, having been sealed away from further revealment by the promise I had made to Thomas, hiding behind my lips and my memory. I began to realize Thomas had begun to lie to himself, and in turn to the rest of the sides. It was his logic that had created this faulty reasoning that everything was going to be fine. The cognitive distortions being forever in my favor as I was unable to correctly reason why I shouldn’t tell Virgil the truth. And I began to question if Thomas’s facts, or more directly, if I would ever be right again.

I retreated back to my room after the group had settled on a water park for the day’s adventure. The door to Virgil’s room slamming shut shortly after I arrived, told me he was just as frustrated as I was confused. I looked to all the scheduling and planning paperwork I had filled out the day of the information reveal, laid strewn about my desk in an unorderly fashion. Resentment built up in my chest as I gathered it all up and dropped it in the garbage. I remember talking to myself and reasoning that there was no need for thorough planning and that, for once, I could relax. Hah! Relax. I still don’t understand the meaning of the word.

I remembering researching a plethora of topics with the free time that I had for the rest of the day while Thomas and his friends were at the Water Park. I figured, if I couldn’t be useful then at least I would try to learn as much as I could before I was unable to function as a side any longer. It started with random topics, sporadically jumping from subject to subject, soaking up all of the facts that I knew would probably never be of use to me in the near future. As I look back on my decision now, I believe it was a coping mechanism I used as I continued processing the information I had learned about just a day before. But, I can say matter of factly that I am not unhappy with my choice.

Ironically, sometime during my nonsensical research pattern, I came across the word love. I had almost bypassed it, but in my current state as disheveled as it was, I began to look into it using the same faulty reasoning as Thomas was using to lie to the other sides. At first, it was everything that Patton basically was. The mushy, feels, icky complicated human emotions, but something snapped as I continued to read deeper into the meanings of love. What I found that immediatly brought me out of my disarrangement and straight to epiphany, was just a simple sentence. “Love is a feeling, but it is also a choice.”

My discernment began to return as I pondered this thought. These two definitions of love can work independently of each other. One can have a feeling without taking action and one can act out of love without a feeling of love behind it! The latter being one of the main reasons long term relationships and friendships last as long as they do. Love isn’t always an emotion. Now granted, emotions can act as a catalyst to help spur acts of love on to become a reality, but the thought that someone could actually love without having an emotion tied with it shocked me. Perhaps I am more capable of love than everyone, including myself, thought I was.

Quickly grabbing scrap paper, I excitedly began to research the different acts of love and their meaning. Compassion. Time spent. Empathy. Sympathy. ...sacrifice. As I look back on my time as a logical side, I wish I had not been so arrogant and researched this sooner. Perhaps some of the fights I have had with Patton, Roman, and Virgil might have been avoided. At the very end of my research I closed with a statement that I am still quite confused about. “All of these acts must be performed with the expectation that you will get nothing in return. Love was never meant to be a bargain, but of an unconditional accord.” I cam to a conclusion that will awestruck me. It was really only my ignorance that kept me from the brotherly and family type of love I could have shared with my fellow sides.

I immediately related all this information back to my present situation as I jumped out of my chair and began to write down my thoughts. I could let Patton know I love him by letting him have more of his way this week. I could show Virgil I love him by trying to get to know him better. I could let Roman know I love him by acknowledging that he might be correct on something, and not being mean about it. I do not have to deliberately state I love them for me to know I meant it. And even if they don’t love me back perse, I will know that I have been able to overcome a boundary that no one including myself had thought possible. Understanding that this experiment would take the total of my being, did not phase me one bit, because I knew that I had nothing left to lose, but six days time.

This satisfying realization encompassed me as I planned how to put the entirety of my research to practice. And for once, as I continue to do now, I smiled...

---End of Part 3---