#he looked so sad for the blobfish

[soggyarts]

gave them a happy ending and wanted to share

[famousblueraincoatmp3]

weird fucking animals in the sea tier list

big fin squid. what in the actual fuck is this?

2. phronima. inspired the face hugger from alien

3. big red jellyfish (thats its scientific name....)

4. squid worm???????? wtf is this monstrosity against god? (i love it)

5. frilled shark....just why?

6. barrel eye fish. its cute i guess but it looks so sad like a renaissance painting:( hey little guy cheer up you have lots of fans x

7. chained cat shark so cool but why tf is it in our ocean

8. japanese spider crab (i love this freaking thing but even a fan like me has got to admit this looks like a dark souls boss you'll die to 500 times before looking up various elemental tactics on reddit and gamefaqs.

9. bristle worms. they are sturdy to me ♥

10. blobfish...shes not that weird to me the thing thats weird is that people apperently eat it??? but folks will eat anything i swear to god. leave it alone its just a weird guy!!!!!!!

11. goblin shark. presented with no further explination. shark evolution is so fucked man

12. sixgill shark. he's back and hes coming in hot. i love his goofy ass

13. whatever in gods green earths name this is (black swallower, shes soooo real)

14. is it a tier ranking without me bringing up 12 squids? i dont think so. this here's a vampire squid, miss, a fine specimen for sure

15. gulper eel. ???

[fullsunsets]

Thanks to @jmagnabo92 @myheartalivewrites @henryspearl @iboatedhere @thesleepyskipper for tagging me

To celebrate hitting 50k words in my RBB fic, I will be sharing one of my favorite moments ever.

How a wonderful, funny, kind, and handsome man like Henry Fox is spending Valentine’s day all alone with his annoying straight friend and not on some romantic ass date is beyond comprehension for Alex.

“I honestly don’t understand how you’re still single,” Alex blurts out and Henry freezes midway through grabbing the last can of beer.

“I— well…” Henry tries to start, but he keeps opening and closing his mouth like a blobfish. And Alex might have lost count of how much he has been drinking because he finds Henry’s whole reaction cute.

“It’s just… You’re such a cool guy and honestly, the fact that no guy has snagged you for a date, today of all days, feels so wrong to me. They have no idea what they are missing,” the filter between his racing thoughts and his mouth is already faulty when sober, so there is no surprise it’s nonexistent when he’s drunk. 

Henry looks at him surprised, almost as if he is trying to make sense of the scene playing in front of him. “I honestly don’t mind, the holiday is so commercialized anyway. I’m——”

“H, I’m not dumb,” he turns to his friend and they are currently staring at each other, “You are a hopeless romantic who dreams of the day you’ll get your love story worthy for an Austen heroine. And while I am sad to inform you that you are not an Austen heroine, but Mr. Darcy, my point that you are a sucker for love still stands. You deserve being knocked off your fucking feet, someone to take you to some fancy ass restaurant, to take you around the Smithsonian and hear you go on your cute little rants, baby. And the fact that no guy has given you that, fucking pisses me off. Instead, you are stuck with me getting piss drunk while we watch Star Wars and argue about which movie is better for the umpteenth time,” he looks at Henry straight in the eyes, hoping he gets Henry to see he deserves so much better. 

“Alex, I didn’t know you were hating spending the night with me that much,” Henry teases, but at this point, Alex has become almost an expert in reading him and can see the tension in his shoulders.

Almost as if he actually believes what he just said, and that just breaks Alex.

“That’s not what I’m trying to say, asshole!” he glares at him and Henry chuckles, “No, H, I’m so serious right now, you have no idea. This is the best night ever, and I will never take this for granted. But you deserve the world! The point is that you should be out having cheesy-ass dates with the love of your life instead of being stuck with your straight friend who is too annoying to get himself a date.”

“So if you had a date for today you would have dumped me?” Henry jokes, but then Alex freezes.

He never told Henry about the girl who tried to ask him out last Saturday after trivia night. She was cute and even Nora pointed out she looked like Alex’s type, although he doesn’t know where she gets that his type is blond. They dated and Nora is very much not a blond. However, he already had made plans with Henry and he didn’t want to leave him all alone on Valentine's day. At least that’s what he told Nora and his sister, but he can’t shake off the way they looked at him, as if he was the dumbest person they know. 

And honestly, he probably is, because who turns down a date to hang out with their friend. Someone he has only been calling a friend for a few weeks.

Yet, Alex doesn’t care if he and Henry have only been friends since late January or for 5 years. That's his best friend right there. He doesn’t care what Nora has to say about it. He’s allowed to have two best friends.

“No,” he admits and Henry’s eyes widen, “I already made a promise to you and I don’t break them.”

Tags: @theprinceandagcd @luainthewild @benwvatt @onetwistedmiracle + open tag

[carlos-in-glasses]

Thank you for the tag @im-overstimulated-and-im-sad @thisbuildinghasfeelings @lemonlyman-dotcom @fallout-mars @strandnreyes @redshirt2 @sznofthesticks @heartstringsduet 🧡💛🧡💛

This is from Where All This Love Comes From Chapter 11: Lonely as a Sparrow In the Rain, which will be posted on Sunday. A little moment between TK 'Soothing' Strand and Carlos 'Blobfish Reyes:

“Hey, baby, how are you feeling?” TK yawns from the couch when Carlos enters. He’s still in his pajamas – still trying to reset his body clock after his final night shift for a while – and he appears to be eating red jello from a glass dish. “I made jello. Don’t know if you saw my note on the refrigerator. Cap had a clear out and asked if we’d want a jello mold shaped like a hippo, so obviously I said yes. It doesn’t really look like a hippo – it’s more like a blobfish. But it’s delicious and will be easy on your stomach. How’d your morning go? Baby?”

Carlos can’t speak. He swallows. His throat hurts. He wanders over and slumps down next to TK on the cushions.

“You’re puffy,” TK says, “Tell me why you’re puffy?” He places his jello dish onto a coaster on the coffee table so he can freely stroke Carlos’ hair. 

Usually, Carlos would sigh or hum with pleasure at the sensation of TK’s fingers working over him, but today he whimpers.

Staring mournfully at the jello, he thinks it wobbles like a struggling, living thing, but shines like cut rubies where the sun catches its nebulous edges. Grossly beautiful. TK made a hippo jello. Life goes on in this way.  

“Tell me why you look even worse now than you did earlier?" TK prompts softly. "Tell me why you look like a blobfish?”

“Gutiérrez texted.” Carlos’ voice hits the words and cracks. He hears himself, squeaky and weak. He hates it. “That lead we thought was sound…It was no good.”

“Baby.” TK snuggles up to him a little closer. "I'm so sorry." 

Carlos sleepily drops his arm over TK’s legs, tugging at the soft brushed cotton of the pajama pants patterned with blue diamonds. A surprise replacement gift for TK after the fire. He’d never bought TK pajamas before, and it felt so intimate in a new way.

TK hadn’t said anything about Gutiérrez’ lead when it first came through, but he’d thought it was one hell of a longshot even though Carlos became excited and determined. Now his husband is a crumpled heap on the couch. “Do you want me to rub your back?” TK asks.

“Head,” Carlos says.

“In bed?”

“Okay.”

Open tag and tags below!

@reyesstrand @cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut @louis-ii-reyes-strand @ladytessa74 @alrightbuckaroo @liminalmemories21 @carlos-tk @noxsoulmate @chaotictarlos @taralaurel @lightningboltreader @orchidscript @jesuisici33 @herefortarlos @eclectic-sassycoweyes @wandering-night19 @never-blooms @my-little-tilly @whatsintheboxmh @fitzherbertssmolder @inkweedandlizards @three-drink-amy @ambiguouspenny @chicgeekgirl89 @sugdenlovesdingle @theghostofashton @spaghett-onaplate @welcometololaland @rmd-writes @freneticfloetry @paperstorm @sanjuwrites @goodways - if you want to share/ haven't already! No pressure ever! ❤️🩷🧡💛💚💙🩵💜

[octoagentmiles]

@poisonedbasil

Gladly <3

First of all, Captain Barnacles:

He was born, and raised through the Polar Scout program with his twin sister Bianca. Through this program, he met Professor Natquik and Tracker (and possibly Boris the Narwhal).

At some point during his scout days, he met Professor Inkling, who had found himself trapped in the Arctic somehow, and had to be rescued by the cubs (including Barnacles).

Natquik was Barnacles’ mentor and father figure who was forced to leave the Arctic so he could do research in Antarctica. Tracker joined the Polar Scouts soon after he left, and he never made it back home. He was stuck in the Antarctic for at least 20 years, maybe longer.

When Barnacles was a cub, some ice cracked from underneath him and he got stuck in a very deep hole for a very long time, and he now has PTSD from the event.

Sometime after he graduated Scouts, he got a position on a ship called the MV Manitoba. It’s very likely (but not canon...... yet-) that he met Tweak on this ship.

The ship crashed, he returned home to the Arctic, reunited with Tracker, and trained him to run the Polar Emergency Post Station.

After that, he was asked by Professor Inkling to be Captain of the Octonauts.

Kwazii. This cat has so much story potential but I will say right now that a LOT of it is speculation/theory. MOST of what I'm about to say is canon though:

Kwazii is different from other pirates, and has been since he was little. Pirates are scary and mean, just like the legends, but Kwazii is kind and good.

Kwazii was born to a huge family of pirates. His grandfather, Calico Jack (aptly named after real life pirate “Calico Jack”), is one of the most famous pirates who ever lived, and they look a lot alike.

Calico Jack left his family/crew behind “in search of the Hidden City of Gold” (so he said), when Kwazii was just a little kitten.

Kwazii was abandoned by his family for being weak (kind, soft, etc.).

He chose to NOT be a pirate at one point in his life...

(This might be what caused his family to abandon him; ie. he made a big show one night about not wanting to be like them, and they were like “ok walk the plank then.” and he did.)

...but then RECHOSE to be a pirate again after learning about his grandfather.

He was a pirate of his own making for a while, with no crew,

Before getting found by Barnacles/The Octonauts and joining them.

All cats in this universe seem to be pirates, plus Kwazii wears an eyepatch and speaks generally very piratey, so despite being an Octonaut creatures are always afraid of him because they recognize him as a pirate--

and it’s very sad because all he wants to do is help but he keeps getting attacked-- [*sobs*]

Peso:

Lil guy was SO insecure in seasons 1-2+½.

He was very dependent on others, and always compared himself to his friends (mainly Barnacles and Kwazii).

He has a HUGE family, including a little brother, big brother (his name is Pogo but we haven’t met him yet, he’s mentioned in the blobfish episode), and one million cousins.

It’s possible that growing up around so many other penguins, that he did get compared to them quite a bit, and/or never fully got to shine. Which is why he’d get so flustered being in the spotlight in s1-2.

His dependency issues are interesting, because Peso gets his best character growth moments when he’s forced to be by himself. (Vampire Squid, Aggregate Anemones, Spookfish, CONE SNAIL, and more.)

He’s also the youngest and newest recruit on the Octopod, so that’s fun. He hasn’t been around for very long; we see him going through training in season 1, so he probably joined off-screen sometime right before the first episode.

Shellington:

We don’t know too much about Shellington, but we DO know that he is a sea otter who is allergic to urchins: meaning he literally cannot do the one thing sea otters are expected to do (eat urchins so they don’t destroy kelp forests) and y’know that’s gotta be pretty stressful.

He discovered the Vegimals himself, and named all of them. He incubated and hatched their eggs in his lab, and has been studying them ever since, and that’s how he picked up their language.

Dashi doesn’t have much going for her, not gonna lie. The most she’s ever gotten is in The Caves of Sac Actun, where they revealed she did cave diving with Ryla.

#SilvergategiveDashisomeloreplease2022

aaaaaaaand I can’t go too deep into Inkling or Tweak without significantly spoiling Season 5, but there is a little bit I can say about Tweak:

She grew up the in the Florida Everglades with her father, as a creature tracker and outdoorsy kid.

Somewhere along the line she started building gadgets and gizmos.

She then [REDACTED SPOILERS], and eventually (again, not canon yet-) joined the Manitoba crew where she met Barnacles.

She was the first ever official Octonaut, as she was there before they were even called "The Octonauts".

She built the first Octopod. It crashed; she built the second Octopod. She built all the gups.

and the rest that I could say about her is just theory and speculation 😅

AND I really wanna ramble about Calico Jack real quick: He has a VERY mysterious past—he is kind and good like Kwazii, but it's implied he wasn't always like that. He was hiding out in the Amazon River for almost 20 years, claiming he was "stuck", but was able to leave with ease the second he had a reason to. He's terrified of disappointing Kwazii, and Captain Barnacles too now that he's an Octo-Agent, and I just think that's really interesting. 👀👀

also not sure if it counts but in the books there were cities, towns, and kingdoms, so a lot of people like to imagine that there are still cities full of animal-people out there somewhere in the showverse. especially since there's multiple instances of the Octonauts picking up trash, including tires, grocery bags, etc., that's polluting the ocean that they say "was thrown away", Tweak mentioning "ordering parts" from somewhere, plus Dashi's side gig with "National Seaographic".

There's ALSO like,,, a whole Thing regarding the difference between animals and animal-people that's been sparked by Above and Beyond, because there's been a lot of non-anthro cats, bears, there was a picture of a bunny at one point, plus the entire Red Fox episode directly addressing the topic of animal instinct and the differences between arctic foxes (Natquik) and red foxes (new non-anthro character); but we don't know how far they're going to go with this.

and that's pretty much it???? i think???? if I think of more I'll let ya know lol <3

[monstermaster13]

Transformation Hot Takes:

- Stereotypical toon tfs, not my thing, but actual cartoon character tfs, yes please.

- Mascot tfs into a generic mascot you just made up instead of existing ones..okay, but I prefer actual existing mascot character tfs, and by that mean I don't mean acting like mascots are sentient beings, that being sad...Pepsiman and The Noid should NEVER be used for TFs ever again because who wants to be those characters.

- Am I the only one who thinks that otaku/fat nerd transformations are offensive? I have an OC who is an overweight character and he very much thinks that the stereotypes associated with nerds and with overweight characters are offensive when it comes to transformations like this. Yeah, make as many whiny social media posts about me as you want, I just don't think a were-otaku who is fat and is bad at sex despite being so horny all the time is a good werecreature to have. Look, not all nerds are fat. And since when were nerds bad in the love-making department? I mean Sheldon Cooper has a girlfriend, Egon Spengler got himself a wife and has a daughter and two grandkids, and Ray got banged by a ghost, in a dream but still...he got to make out with a ghost. And if the AoE every turns people into bad cosplayers of husbandos for the were-otaku to lust over or into toys to be put into the 'love ooze' jar, no thank you.

- Why are suiting tfs even a thing, it's not a transformation, it's just sticking some person in a suit?

- Drones are disgusting and creepy in my opinion. Look I have nothing against robot tfs except when it's one that fetishes turning someone into a robot, nobody had their sexual awakening to Vera Webster in Superman III, so why act like it's hot to be a robot?

- I don't mind dark tfs but I really don't like animal transformations where the victim is unable to talk or think like a human. Also seeing good characters get corrupted is always going to make me feel uncomfortable.

- Bears make for a boring transformation subject. I mean in actuality all bears just eat and sleep, it is no different than being a house-cat or a sloth. I mean you might as well go for a sloth. But if you want an animal that sleeps a lot, you could have just gotten a koala instead since koalas are rarely used.

- The only inanimate transformations that i'd ever deem acceptable are living versions of Spirit Halloween, Transworld and Gemmy animatronics.

- Bimbofication is not my thing and never was.

- Transfurs and protogens are overrated, there I said it.

- Real person transformations are not evil/terrible/bad.

- Why is the kangaroo the go to marsupial transformation when the koala, bandicoot and wombat are right there?

- I don't mind character tfs into a character the artist/writer likes...however, I could do without the needlessly grim and dark tfs that try to emulate David Cronenberg especially if it's just a humanoid character they are turning into and could do without mind change.

- There are fish species besides sharks. Sharks are not as scary/badass as the media depicts them, try some tetras, or a blobfish, or an anglerfish, or even a piranha, or a stargazer.

- No matter how much creepy body horror you put into it...a clown tf is just a tf into another human being, stop treating them like a species. And also shouldn't be a thing.

- I have nothing against weight gain in transformations as long as it makes sense for a character/form to be that size, the person is happy, and if it's not overly fetishistic, often it falls into the fat fetishism category and it is treated like it's 'aspirational' to be overweight when it's actually not, stop objectifying overweight people and patronizing them, they aren't your object of desire. You know, when I do my Aykroyd transformations it's a joke in the stories that the were-aykroyd form is appealing to both men and women, and my characters is sometimes attracted to his were-aykroyd form, and it isn't because he's thicc in that form, it's because his charm is increased in that form, heck the dum dum were-aykroyd tfs are PARODIES of those fat fetish weight gain stories because dum dum were-aykroyds are considered a JOKE species of were-aykroyd in his main universe.

- Horror movie character transformations are rare and should be done more often.

- Cow transformations get a bad reputation because of the flatulence and fecal matter aspects that somehow always get shoved in.

[squeiky]

writing my MetalChaos fic has given me a deeper appreciation of the art of the Sonic adventure games.

I'll be diving into it in my fic for sure- but there's a genuineness in the way Shadow and Chaos are so similar yet so incredibly tragic. (This applies to Maria and Tikal too)

Like everyone loves diving into Shadow's lore and traumas and stuff- but have we ever stopped to consider that Chaos might actually have that as well?

We have these two incredibly kind and loving people- who simply want peace (Tikal) and protectcs the vunerable and weak (Chaos). They just want happiness, peace and safety.

Then, imagine your own FATHER (yikes parental issues!) decides that the best way for peace is actual war. and this girl.. is incredibly brave, and heroic.

She stands up to her father multiple times- requests and talks to the literal master emerald and manages to get its assistance- She continues to protect the chao and the master emerald in front of her father's soliders(?) She does everything she can think of to save people-

and in the end she and the group of chao get smacked down by these guys.

The last we see then is where the world is coated in RED. They're in the middle of an actual WAR! you can hear her desperation and worry with how much she's begging- and rushing- and trying her hardest.

and MAN is it tragic. To see her hit the floor with the COMPLETE BETRAYAL due to her OWN FATHERS greed.

and then we sit there and watch CHAOS- the peaceful. the docile. the PROTECTOR, the kind and gentle being who protects the weak and vulnerable. On top of the altar (that man is OUT of the water. War is waging and he is NOT happy) only to see his freinds and the chao he had sworn to protect on the floor- with an army of soilders charging towards the master emerald-

and the last thing he hears before sending them all away to god-knows-where? "ah! a monster!"

What. the. actual. fuck.

you spend your life just caring for others and protecting those in need. These innocent cute looking creatures and you their #1 caretaker. You are in the middle of a war and out of your comfort zone (pond) and are faced with the troubling situation of having possibly thousands of those cute adorable creatures- and innocent people getting attacked, hurt, killed, and all because of some greedy ass bastards. Then the last thing you see- is a charging army, and those exact chao on the ground AND your freind. Your too late. you couldn't protect them. to do the one thing you were supposed to do. Then your attacked by those same exact soilders..

and then some fucker has the audacity to call YOU the monster???

then you get put in the master emerald or something for like hundreds of years- not 50 years (im looking at you shadow) BUT SINCE ANCIENT TIMES-

like I would be PISSED. I would be incredibly also SAD. This guy held a MAJOR grudge- for THOUSANDS OF YEARS- OF COURSE HE'S ANGRY OF COURSE HES GRIEVING. This guy was freed by eggman- and you know the FIRST CUTSCENE we see of this guy- Is him getting attacked by the goddamn POLICE (cause GUN didnt exist yeah- he even jumps down from a rooftop all dramatic too)

like has anyone ever thought to consider that chaos might have.. feelings? that y'know maybe the guy was grieving? that maybe he (like shadow) took it out of some random city because the first thing he was faced with was aggression?

Somebody made a prophecy of him fighting sonic- and somebody started calling him the "god of destruction" when like.. his entire self is the complete opposite of that. Who thought he would be okay with having his own legacy be at a time he was grieving? Who called him that at a time where that battle hasn't even happened yet.

(this is like if you, a historical being, came back to life- and the historians only know about the times you were having a mid-life crisis (or worse.) like just imagine that. This is blobfish-name levels of wtf. Put that man back underwater!! Stop naming things based on a creatures worst-moments of their life. I feel bad for blobfish.)

He was angry, he was sad, he was grieving. He's noted as being a kind and gentle soul- do you think a kind and gentle soul would immediately decided to trash an entire city? no! That guy was going through something. of course he was he still in WAR mode- and that was only furthered by being constantly ATTACKED.

Tikal said "were these the chao you were trying to protect?" and like that just hits it home that Chaos is just... going through some shit and sometimes when your really powerful- you going through shit means everybody else got too.

but yknow he's not as popular so who am I going to vent this too??? Who can I go "hey SA1&Sa2 are very paralleled and have a lot of similarities and one of those happens to be that maybe- just maybe Chaos (and Tikal) might actually be a bit traumatized. Yet he has no way of communicating that other than destruction."

also Tikal is very much a hero and should be assigned as such because this girl is incredible. She deserves lots of love for her efforts. Girl sacrificed so much to bring peace and like... she didn't deserve to have such a shitty parent.

[admiringlove]

this timestamp can be read as a standalone, but also as the part two of this. 

[17:04] . . .

"you look... chipper."

you roll your eyes at the comment as you scoot over to one side of the bench. osamu laughs as he sits, "'kay maybe not so much anymore."

"is it 'cause of yer date with sunarin?" he looks over at you. you shut your book a little too loudly at the question, stomach fluttering as you hurriedly put it in your bag. classes were over for the day, and osamu had accidentally caught you at the park outside your university.

you wish he hadn't. because there was no way in hell your best friend was about to let you go without details. osamu might look like a carefree, laid-back hunk but he really wasn't. he just seemed that way because he rarely ever gets proper sleep. you let out a breath, "maybe."

"the fuck is 'maybe'?" he narrows his eyes now, "c'mon, tell me how it went."

"it was a date, nothing special," you refrain from saying anything further, but osamu nudges you and keeps going, "dates are special, dumbass.

you roll your eyes. he keeps going.

"was it cute? did you guys go ta that café that's all cutesy and has pastel colors on the walls and the workers wear pastel shirts 'n shit? or didja go to the movies and makeout in the back or somethin'? c'mon, gimme somethin' to go off on here. was it fancy? or was it a long drive with snacks-"

"we went to the arcade," you mumble, "like we did in high school."

osamu stops talking almost immediately, letting you continue. his expression is semi-serious now, a softened look in his eyes.

"and it was fun. i didn't expect it to be, but it was fun," you nod. your voice is in the middle of solemn and gushy, you don't know how to describe it. but you continue, "we played the crane game and he won me a plushie."

the arcade brought back a lot of nostalgia. when you and rintarō were in high school, you would end up going to the nearby arcade after volleyball practice. he would beat you in shooting games, and you would absolutely destroy him at dance dance revolution. he would end up sulking, which would lead to you sponsoring the chuupets. 

you were sure suna reciprocated your feelings back then. stolen glances, passing notes in class, the small quirk of his lips whenever you’d appear in the room. it felt giddy back then. until senior year, when you heard him telling people to pay up because he was going to ask you to go on a date with him. which you promptly said no to. 

after that, you stopped going to the arcade with him. you stopped talking to him entirely. you dropped volleyball club, even though there were around two or three matches left to play. 

"are ya sad or are ya happy?" osamu raises an eyebrow, "ya looked happy but ya sound sad."

"i'm... surprised and confused. and happy. it's a lot to process. he asked me out for a bet in high school. and now he's being completely serious, and i don't know. maybe it's just me being paranoid, but i like him. i just don't want the same things happening again," you say, "you remember how that went."

he does. it was downright depressing. helping you avoid suna in the hallways, hiding you in empty classrooms so you don’t break down, walking back home with the team on another route because your house was on their usual one—downright depressing, indeed. he remembers one time when he came to your house to ask you for some help in english, and saw you watching cheesy romance movies. tissues splayed out on the bedsheets, room a complete mess and you looked like you hadn’t showered in days. he made sure to be a little assertive that day, helping you clean your room as he told you not to look like a blobfish in bed. 

"i had to cook ya somethin' everyday, 'twas fun for me. except for when i had to walk in on ya watchin’ the notebook, that was disgusting," he chuckles. you punch his side, "oh c'mon, 'm joking! you quittin’ the manager job of the club was the hardest part for me."

you sigh, "'samu, be honest. you think i should give rintarō another try?"

osamu pauses for a moment, as if picking out what to exactly say in his mind. he's the only person who's seen and heard both of the sides—comforting you when you were heartbroken and buying video games for suna when he felt like a coward for what he did to you. high school sure was filled with morons and oblivious idiots. whether it be forcing suna to take a shower before practice because he looked like he hadn’t done that in a week, or stealing your phone so you can actually get some sleep instead of watching cutesy videos at night and cry about them.

"ya know," osamu starts, "he really did like ya in high school. how about this? if he does somethin' stupid again, i'll beat the shit outta him."

you laugh, "your inner atsumu is showing."

"ew," his face contorts into a disgusted expression, "oh just so you know, sunarin is headin' this way."

"wait, what?"

"see ya."

“’samu, wait-”

osamu gets up now, giving you a quick thumbs-up as he leaves, a sheepish grin on his face as you throw him a scowl. he's walking farther and farther away, until you hear a voice behind you.

"hey," suna sits on the empty bench, "how was your day?"

"it was good," you nod. his chartreuse eyes look empty, just like they do all the time, but his lips hold a small smile. tugging up, just barely. he sweeps his hair away from his face before he asks, "are you free tonight?"

"why?" you raise an eyebrow. he gives you a smirk, "i wanna beat you at dance dance revolution."

"that's not going to happen," you chuckle, "you suck at it."

"hey, i do not suck at it!"

"yes you do," you're laughing now, and it goes on for a good minute until you're breathless. once you get a hold of yourself, you look over at suna, who fumbles.

he was smiling. not the creepy, weird, camera smile that you used to make fun of him for when you were kids, but the small, adorable one that used to make guest appearances whenever he was truly happy.

maybe osamu was right. and just maybe, this would work out after all.

© all works belong to admiringlove on tumblr. plagiarism is strictly prohibited.

[astaroth1357]

How the Brothers Would Try to Get the MC Back After a Breakup

I have a much longer one in the works, but dug this out of my old drafts and just had to polish it off real quick. Not sure why I never finished it. 🤷‍♀️

Lucifer

His first tactic is to try and make them try to get back with him.

That means he’s going to go out and slay it! He’s going to make sure he’s looking great and really making a point of just how much he can do and how capable he is in literally Every. Way. If they’re watching, he’s going to be amazing. Period.

Buuut he’ll be sure to treat them super coldly throughout... This isn’t him trying to nicely ask them to come back to him, oh no, this is just making a point about how much they threw away, stupid human...!

If this doesn’t send them crawling back then he’s really in a bad place… He really needs them to come back on their own because his pride won't let him…

If he ever has to ask, it will feel more like a business deal than a reconciliation but that means he’s desperate. Hear him out at least.

Mammon

He’s going to be an absolute nightmare...

I think we all know that Mammon would fall apart without MC and it really wouldn't be a graceful fall…

Man will go through all the stages of grief seemingly every hour, everywhere from "WELL I DON'T NEED YA ANYWAY!" to, "Baby I'll buy ya anything, please come back…!"

The worst of it comes out when he's drunk and it's also when his worst ideas sound fantastic!

Not above breaking into their room at night just to sing them a poorly-written, sappy love song.

Also not above begging his brothers, Simeon, and even Diavolo for ideas on how to win them back.

If he could put it on one of those airplane banners and fly it across the Devildom, he would. Please MC, he's trying here…

Leviathan

Pity. Pity. So much pity. He is not afraid to treat his own dignity like collateral damage if he has to.

In the weeks after the breakup, Levi would probably be best described as one of those gelatinous deep sea Blobfish thrown on dry land, just with 90% more sadness and wallowing.

Assuming he leaves his room at all, he'll look like complete trash who hasn’t slept in weeks. Just an ultra-depressed otaku covered in Dorito dust and self-pity…

Basically, everything about him is going to scream, "I'M MISERABLE WITHOUT YOU, PLEASE COME COMFORT ME!!!" and considering that may have initiated their relationship to start with, it's not a terrible tactic.

If turning into a pathetic beached jellyfish of despair doesn't work then he'll try begging too. Third brother or not, dignity was never a priority here. Just MC… Always MC.

Satan

Meet our resident drunk texter.

During the day, Satan is going to take more of a Lucifer route and just be as impressive as he possibly can. However, he doesn't quite have Lucifer's level of deep emotional repression through pure spite…

What that means is occasionally he's going to crack and it's rough.

Get a few drinks in him and Satan will just break into a sobbing mess… Any poor soul in the vicinity will have to listen to his incoherent babbling about how many dates he's had with MC, how much he loves them, and why he can't sleep without them anymore…

But the texts… Man, are they something…

Satan: MC yourr the sptinkles to my waffls

Satan: why did you leave me? 🥺

Satan: im in the bat, its really cold  here

Satan: pleaae come home 😭😭😭

Satan: I'd murder fr yo

Satan: i mean love you

Satan: come back please

Asmodeus

Jealousy. Pure, simple jealousy. You think he can’t have three other people on his arms by the end of the week? Don't you know what you’re missing??

If Mammon is going through grief stages, then Asmo is stuck on anger. To think that he, HE, would be broken up with!! The nerve!!!

He'll go out clubbing and fucking and make a big'ol deal out of it for at least a week, but if it doesn't really help his case then he's really screwed… (like, figuratively this time)

After his anger burns out there'll be A LOT of crying and Asmo will make it his mission to get together again!!

That could involve everything from long-winded apology speeches, to dragging Solomon into complicated "Let's date again!" schemes, to dangling himself in front of MC like a carrot on a stick to try and entice them back.

EVERYONE in the House is going to hear about it and it'll drive them all crazy, but hey, anything in the name of love, damnit!!

Beelzebub

Lots of gifts, mostly food.

You'd think he'd be leaving offerings to a pagan god with the amount of food he tries to give MC… The man could actually feed a village with those plates!

To be frank, Beel doesn’t even have to do all that much in the grand scheme of things. A sad Beel is like a sad puppy, it just tugs at the heartstrings by its pure existence!

It also helps that he'd be willing to just… talk about getting back together like emotionally mature adults (novel concept, I know)

If they talk it out and the MC still isn't interested then expect more food and more sad Beel... He'll pretty much be like a depressed Santa Claus with a bag of T-bone steaks.

Be careful how long you keep Beel sad for though, MC, because Belphie isn't afraid to murder you twice. He's keeping a knife in that pillow. Be warned.

Belphegor

He's too busy not caring to even try.

Seriously. He doesn't care. Really. Not at all. Not even a little. Were they even dating? He didn't notice!

In fact, he doesn't care so much that he's going to nap in all of their favorite places, rewatch all of their favorite movies, and listen to their favorite songs because he just doesn't give a shit.

He doesn't care so much that he'll totally still invite them out to festivals and theme parks because it doesn't matter and they can still have a lot of fun together anyway!

He doesn't care SO FREAKING MUCH that if they wanted to nap together again or even cuddle a bit it's totally fine because it doesn't mean anything and he's fine and they're fine and this is fine!! Everything is a'okay!!!

See? No complaints outta him. But if they wanted to get back together uh… that's fine too… please...

[ao3writers-pls-love-me]

some chaotic Solangelo headcanons im thriving

Will "hi" and Nico "greeting" when encountering monsters

"is this coffee?", "no, Will. that's tea", "oh", "wtf are you guys talking abt thats clearly milk???"

Will menacingly stands outside of Nico's cabin, trying to ask for a date at 2:00PM

they exchange the most cheesiest letters for each other on random days and it's usually Nico's heart-felt, romantic, hit with the feels "i love you to death" and Will's short, wholesome, what is this language "you're my little pogchamp". on days, both of them read it, and on days, they are fucking done. they can never talk to each other for weeks without cringing crying yelling and dying

Nico doesn’t swear. He's the "language"-ing guy. Especially to Will

"oh sh—", "language", "—sh-shard-borne dingus! i breaky my fingy!"

Will curses a lot but with Nico he just switches it with Shakespearian insults, "Will you're a bitch", "hey! how dare you—", "oh no Nico! it's ok—", "fuck you too Nico!", "now listen here, you ubiquitous cloven-hoved special little chucklefucker, you are a, excuse me Nico, a nostalgic milk-livered wanger who would fuck maggots with his onion-eyed boner, how dare you rat bastard says those words to my loveliest significant other!", "oh that's definitely not gonna get a language from me, you go and drop those bars babe" , "WHAT THE ACTUAL FUC—???"

Nico beating up Ares kids with his bare hands and they love him for it

Will treating Ares kids like, everyday (mainly because of Nico) and they love him for it

Nico talks a lot, about things, he would go full on presentations to Will about, extremely stupid stuffs like, how cats don't eat shoes and are better than dogs but dogs give you cuddles and laugh in barks so i am conflicted and now you have to be in this crisis with me, tesoro

Nico gives Will head pats and kisses

Will gives Nico hugs and embarrassments (and kisses)

they wear each other's pajamas and enjoy their friends and siblings's horrifying faces at 6:30 in the morning

*body slamming the door* "you two ARE having the papapa!", "really Will? why didnt you tell me? i could have put down my ugly stuffed blobfish plush"

They are both needy at ungodly hours

Will is whiny when he wants affection "Nicoooooooooo..."

then there's Nico when in need of literally any kinds of comfort just, cling, onto Will's body for the rest of the day, whoever try to remove him will get their hands bit off

there are days where they put stickers on each other faces and arms and hair and be fabulous

Nico makes GODS-TIER coffees and Will could die for them

Will "sorry" and Nico "apologies/forgive me" when fighting monsters

but actually Will gives them the finger and destroys them with one of his martial-art chokes

they will both scream, at the top of their lungs, when watching scary and horror movies

that's gonna be my headcanons, they are both shit at jump-scares and gory movies. they have to hug each other and cuddle for hours with two enormous blankets and often hide in Will's bed and watch a list of Disney series marathons after one "The Conjuring"

but they still love horror movies

dudes literally gone through wars and somehow get scared by a possessed doll

Nico lowkey adores Will's dad puns

"aight, what do you call a baby ghost?", "Will, please no—", "a little boo", "*snorts* g-gods darnit..."

Nico's his little boo

(fuck why did i do that—)

when Nico's sad, he will look up to Will and his boyfriend will smile, brightly, "hi there, wookie" and Nico will chuckle, saying "hey there, cara mio" and they will hold hand, with Nico trying his hardest not to imitate Will's sweetest giggles

their relationship is at the peak where Will says something and Nico gasps at him, then continues with the "is that a Star War reference?"

it is also at the peak where someone mocks Will with, "an apple a day keep the doctor away" and Nico calmly counters with, "only if you aim it well enough" and throw an apple at that person then broke their nose

. Kayla, dramatically points to Austin: Why did the mattress...

. Austin, dramatically points to Nico:...Go to the doctor?

. Nico, sighs, "dramatically" points to the sun:...why?

. Apollo, dramatically appears, points to the ground: Because!

. Will, dramatically slides in, biting his lips: It had spring fever

. Nico:

Then the Apollo cabin cheer and fetch out their instruments, attempt to do a whole orchestra passionately

[kookieswan]

Nocturne of Waves - Part V

SeaCreature!Yoongi x Heiress!Reader (f)

Word Count: 2.1k

Genre: Sea Creature AU, Mermaid AU, Fluff, some Humor

Summary: There’s nothing quite like having a nice dinner with your bestie and your mate…

Notes: This was originally going to be a request but it worked well for the next part of NoW so… I went big with it lol

Find the NoW Masterlist here!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It’s almost peaceful. You have the windows cracked, the winds blowing in the air from the sea, the sound of the waves from shore just barely audible. A few candles burn, flickering away as you plate the food you just finished making. And behind you sits your closest friend and your… Mate.

“Could you maybe stop glaring at each other? Dinner is ready.” They’ve been burning holes into each other’s skulls since Jimin arrived earlier, all chipper till he saw Yoongi. Yoongi, in turn, looks as tense as you’ve ever seen him. Jimin shifts on his place on the floor, watching as the other man’s tentacles twitch toward him from the couch.

“It’s like they have a mind of their own. Either that or you’re just annoying as hell.” The barest upturn at the corners of Yoongi’s mouth prevents you from stepping in. Maybe you’re a sucker but seeing him smile is worth Jimin getting bullied.

“Yes. Let us go with that, a mind of their own.” With that, you watch in silent accepteance as a tentacle flicks Jimin’s sunglasses off the table. Stepping past them, you sit all of the food down, an array of cooked (and raw) fish with a few side dishes to pick from. Plopping down, you ignore them and settle in.

It’s not a surprise that Yoongi goes for the raw fish almost instantly while you and Jimin grab for the rest, ripping into it like a man starved. Jimin watches in a thinly veiled mixture of curiosity and horror. Sad to say, you’ve become used to the display and even find it a little cute.

“So… You’re like, an octopus?” Pausing, you watch with interest at Yoongi stills. He appraises Jimin with slitted eyes, tentacles strangely still as he replies lowly. You have to convince yourself over and over again that his voice isn’t that sexy. Nope.

“I am not an octopus just because I vaguely resemble one. Are you a blobfish?” The ugliest snort leaves you as you try not to spray your food everywhere, Jimin doing the same for a completely different reason. He squeaks loudly, face heating up as he points at Yoongi with a shaking tiny finger.

“I do NOT look like a blobfish! Take that back!” Yoongi looks strangely satisfied as he sits back, bringing another piece of fish to him to chew on, and promptly ignoring Min. The smaller man picks up a piece of his own food and throws it, but it’s easily deflected by a stray tentacle. Coughing lowly, you tap the coffee table a few times, attempting to calm them.

“Can you guys please calm down? I made us a nice dinner and I’d like if we could actually enjoy it. And no Jimin, you definitely don’t look like a blobfish.” Jimin’s the farthest thing from a blobfish, pretty face and golden hair. You’d actually had the smallest of crushes on him before finding out he wasn’t ever going to be attracted to you like that. Clearing your throat, you turn your attention to Jimin to get a conversation going. Anything is better than them trying to kill each other slowly.

“So, Min, how was the drive?” The man springs up at this, eyes bright as he thinks about it. Yoongi doesn’t say anything, watching on quietly. From your own experience. You know the drive is rather lovely. Very scenic and with the warm weather, super enjoyable with the car windows down and music blasting.

“Oh it was actually really nice! I uh, I talked to Taehyung the whole time. He kept me distracted.” Mind blanking, you can’t remember who exactly Taehyung is. Jimin meets new people all the time, goes through friends rather quickly, and then it hits you.

“Taehyung? Oh, the new guy! Wait… what about your internship?” Jimin shrugs, not looking particularly bothered about it. He doesn’t speak about Taehyung though, avoiding the subject with poised grace. Interesting.

“I put it on hold, talked to some higher ups, said it was a family emergency, all that jazz. I can see now I wasn’t wrong about the emergency aspect since there’s a fish man sitting at the table with us.” You roll your eyes, huffing a bit for Yoongi’s sake. Children, they’re like children.

“His name is Yoongi, Jimin. Be nice to him please. That goes for the both of you, I’d like you to try and be friends, hm? For me?” The paler man actually nods his head, dark hair bobbing along with it. It’s surprising, how much more agreeable he’s been being…

“Yes, Jimin, let us try our best to be… Friends.” Yoongi actually sounds slightly pained, like he’s having a hard time saying it. You’ll never say it but they’re both such whiney babies, it would almost be cute if you weren’t worried about them attempting to eat each other.

“Well, friends get to know each other so… Where do you come from Yoongi?” Silently applauding Jimin, you turn toward Yoongi, excited for his reply. Over the time he’s been here so far, you haven’t asked much, scared to freak him out. Being mated has to be close to dating maybe, so asking questions is needed at this point.

“The sea.” Even though you’re confident Yoongi doesn’t know what sarcasm is, it comes naturally to him. Jimin huffs, looking less than happy, and Yoongi sighs in turn as you attempt not to laugh and look serious instead.

“No where specifically in the sea, I wander. In the last ten or so years though, I have not strayed far from this area except for food.” It makes you wonder, just how far Yoongi has gone, all the places he’s traveled to. It also brings up the fact that you’re not even sure of how old he is…

“I see. Me and my little pumpkin here live kind of far I guess. It’s a few hours away, a large city with no water by it. This is a lot different from that.” A lot different indeed. It’s quieter, calmer, and you’ve been enjoying every second of that. City life can be fun but getting away from all the expensive things and expensive people, sans Jimin, has been a treat.

“Yoongi would thrive there if not for the lack of water. Plenty of food sources.” It’s a joke, it it’s meant to be at least even if it’s a little morbid. Jimin pauses, fork in the air, eyes cutting to Yoongi before raising a brow. Yoongi just looks even more pleased.

“You really eat people.” Not a question, but a statement as Jimin looks Yoongi over and you remain quiet. His voice doesn’t sound harsh really, more like curious with a hint of unease. You’ve long accepted that Yoongi eats people on occasion and likely won’t stop. He looks at Jimin, not shy in the slightest as he replies.

“I eat humans yes, similar to how humans eat fish. I do not single them out though, I eat anything to survive. Most humans get too close for comfort, and that is their own fault.” You’ve never thought about it like that, how many people have probably approached him when they shouldn’t have. You did that though, walked right up to him, touched him, and yet… Jimin nods, small but thoughtful.

“… I suppose I’d eat someone too if they tried to fuck with me…” If you’ve learned anything, it’s that Yoongi is territorial, more so than a human would be. However, you know that if you were to feel threatened, well… You don’t blame Jimin for saying so.

Continuing to eat, an air of contentment washes over the house. It’s quiet, but you’re all coexisting and it’s better than you could have asked for. Jimin’s flamboyant nature mixed with Yoongi’s cynicism seemed like it would be terrible, and yet, things are working. Kind of. You keep quiet as a tentacle slides over to you, poking at your arm and weeping around it. You poke back.

“Who is Taehyung? He was mentioned earlier.” The silence is suddenly pierced by Yoongi’s deep voice, likely trying to carry a conversation at your request. Really very sweet of him, by he doesn’t know the can of worms he just opened either.

“Oh, he’s uh… my friend.” Cheeks a cute pink color, you chuckle as he rubs the back of his neck. Yoongi looks slightly confused, eyebrow raised and waiting for an answer. One that you’re more than willing to give just to tease Min.

“Jimin’s boyfriend more than likely. That means they’re romantically involved, and if he says otherwise, he a big fat liar.” The look Min gives you is sharp but without bite, a tiny smile on his plump lips. He throws a piece of fish at you, and unlike Yoongi, you’re unable to deflect is as it hits your cheek.

“Shut up, I’m not the one that has a mate. What exactly does that entail Yoongi?” The fish slides down as you peer over at the not so scary mermaid that’s taken over your couch. He hums lowly in his throat, eyes far away before he respond quietly, all attention on you.

“We will court; get each other courting gifts, and then be bound if we choose to. It can be romantic, as you say, or otherwise. I will explain more to you later… _____.” Nodding, you decided to bring it up later when the two of you are alone. Noticing that everyone had finished their food for the most part, you stand and collect the plates and take them to the kitchen. There’s murmuring behind you, nothing you can really hear over the water.

It gives you a few minutes to realize that you haven’t had a moment to breath. The house, although nice, is small and having three people in it, one with large tentacles, is pushing the limits. You’re not worried Soviet them, not really, you know they wouldn’t hurt each other.

The real issue is that you came here to be alone, to work out some of your own shit, and doing that with them around might be harder than you thought. Trauma dumping your best firmed and your new pet fish slash mate isn’t likely to end well. Yoongi will be confused and Jimin will coddle you…

Turning back to the two of them a few minutes later, they look casual. A bit too casual really, but it’s not something you’re willing to bring up. If they can exist in the same space together for a bit, then good.

“So… There’s not a guest bedroom meaning that Jimin will have to sleep on the couch…” Disgust is the only way to describe the way Jimin’s face scrunches up. He poked the cushion a few times as if it’s going to eat him, Yoongi’s tentacles coming out to wrap around your ankle gently.

“If you put me in the water box again I will break everything in the bathroom with glee.” It’s Jimin’s turn to laugh, eyes crinkling as he tries to cover his mouth. You don’t think they’ve realized it yet but they feed off each other to annoy you.

“No… You can sleep with me if you want to. The bed should be big enough, we’ll just have to make sure you’re wet and lay down lots of towels.” You’ve been trying to make sure he stays moist at night, cups and bowls of water left around the house for him to pour on himself or drink. Drying out probably isn’t the best idea for him.

“We’re cleaning these cushions off; I’m not sleeping in octoman goo… Or anything else he leaks.”Jimin’s still poking at the couch, as if actually examining it for goo. Yoongi pulls himself off it, tentacle coming up and slapping Jimin’s hand away ‘on accident’.

“I do not produce ‘goo’, although I am starting to produce annoyance.” With that, he starts to pull himself toward your bedroom and your poor, poor bedsheets. Jimin im turn starts ripping off the cushions to the couch, giggling about how you could make a fort instead and stay with him.

“I think I’m actually starting to question my sanity. I’m sleeping with a fish man tonight.” Jimin stops before sending a sly look your way. You watch in distaste as he curls his pointer finger and thumb with one hand to make a hole, using his other pointer finger as a makeshift dick.

“Have fun with your mate.”

[feelingofcontent]

DNP Rewatch: Reacting to my Baby Videos!

Date video was published: 01/07/2016 (X)

DNP Main Channel Rewatch: 295

The first video of 2016! Solo Phil videos are going to be a rarity for 2016 - in fact he only has 6 of them for the entire year. All his other videos are with Dan or collabs.

0:00 - he’s finally got a new mirror in the corner. He didn’t have one for all of 2015 after I SMASHED 3 MIRRORS

0:01 - the usual casual introduction into the new year

0:06 - well that’s taking the festive spirit to a slightly creepy level

0:17 - those are very bright, as usual for his pj pants. I love that he’s still in half-relaxed mode filming this first video

0:24 - umm. thanks for sharing, I guess

0:26 - blobfish! He had already Instagramed about that.

0:41 - okay, those slippers are amazing

0:58 - “what am I doing?” I love when Phil leaves little moments of talking to himself in videos

1:11 - awww, no cringing at baby Phil!

1:18 - yeah that bear looks terrifying

1:33 - oh my god, so cute  😊

1:36 - I do think that’s a pretty interesting first word, rather than the usual “mama” or “dada” or something

1:40 - love that he added a “light” counter 😂

1:48 - Martyn! both their faces still look the same

2:09 - yeah, no thanks. children’s toys in the last 80s were something

2:13 - “Blond” right. Phil that is ginger.

2:23 - I feel for Martyn here trying to corral a younger sibling

2:27 - oh, he stopped doing the “light” counter, sad

2:32 - more terrifying toys

2:38 - it really does look so old fashioned now

2:48 - lol at him saying his child self is only almost as bad as the sim

2:50 - his love of cereal apparently started early

2:56 - that house is built right into the side of a hill

3:05 - feel like Phil is including some of these clips just as an opportunity to embarrass Martyn 😂

3:19 - awww, little Phil wanted a dog so much

3:29 - “am I a woman from the 1900s” lol

3:35 - the “oh dear” is adorable. I love that Phil is just giggling at himself and not cringing

3:41 - Kath! Look at that 80s style

3:46 - dying at the annotation here 😂 And it’s sweet that Phil asked permission from her to include that clip

3:58 - Martyn’s look at the camera at the end here is so great

4:00 - there’s always a bath video!

4:20 - lol at his family appeasing young Phil by getting him a present too.

4:27 - Martyn must have been a very tolerant brother

4:32 - that is a sweet memory

4:53 - I love it! Letting young Phil just pretend to blow it out.

4:57 - “the party game Hunger Games” is quite an intense description for musical chairs

5:05 - Holly the house rabbit! Phil talked about her in TABINOF too.

5:29 - that is a long-living plant! And maybe the start of Phil’s love of houseplants.

5:32 - adorable matching outfits

5:41 - love the hat

5:50 - more robotic future thoughts from Phil

This video is cute and a casual start to a new year of videos, as usual from Phil.

DNP were both back in London for New Year’s, and then took a few more days off, apparently watching lots of tv/movies, gaming, and eating (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6) before getting back into filming videos.

[sritzthefirefly]

The Not-so French Mistake

Pairing: Slight Dean x reader

Word Count: 1.9k

Warnings: Language

Author’s Note: I do not own anything from Supernatural. Any and all comments on this are appreciated. I’m sorry for any grammatical errors that I might have made. This is my first fanfiction (as a one-shot, I've written a few earlier in poetry form) so please go easy on me.

“You are going to die.”, he states nonchalantly, as if three men entering your house and telling you that you are going to die is an everyday occurrence.

“I…WHAT?!”, I shout, my eyes round as saucers.

Well, today was a seemingly normal day. Until the seemingly normal day wasn’t as seemingly normal as I thought it would be.

                                2 hours earlier

“Hey, I’ll be leaving now”, my best friend said as she packed the small handbag she always carried around with her.

“Don’t forget the pickle jar and then come back 15 minutes later telling me you forgot the one thing I reminded you about”, I shouted to her from the top of the stairs.

She turned around to pick up the jar from the centre table when her eyes landed on me and she whistled. I pulled the drawstrings of my silk dressing gown tighter as I walked down the stairs.

“Ooooh, would you look at that, someone’s looking good. So, are you going to sleep after I’m gone, or are you going to have some company tonight?”

“I…..I just can’t……not so soon after...ummm……I know I’m stupid but I just wanted to feel good about myself”

She closed the few steps between us and hugged me tightly.

“Hey, you know he’s an asshole. His words don’t count, ok? No guy has the right to make you feel bad about yourself”, she said, pulling away.

“But he…….”

“No missy, you listen here, he’s an idiot who doesn’t deserve you. He should feel lucky he’s not in town or I would’ve kicked him so hard in the balls that impregnating a woman would’ve been a foreign concept to him.”

I gave her a small smile.

“Thanks for hyping me up, love. I’m now going to have ice cream and cry my heart out to sad rom-coms.”

“Bitch, you hate rom-coms. You’re just going to binge-watch Supernatural and you’re not telling me that because you won’t admit that you’re obsessed with the show”.

“Okay, okay whatever……Aren’t you getting late for your train?”

 She looked at her watch.

 “Oh shit! Bye, see you later.” she said as she ran out of the door, slamming it behind her. I sighed to myself and walked over to the TV, switching it on.

“Self-care time for me now!”, I said to myself, as I opened the fridge to get my favorite ice-cream when suddenly, the doorbell rings. I immediately turned my head towards the centre table and sure enough, the pickle jar was there.

Shaking my head, I picked up her precious jar and walked over to the door, pulling it open.

“I knew you……..”, I stopped short when I saw who was standing outside.

There, standing on my porch were, none other than, Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki.

And then I woke up.

Yeah, if only it happened that way.

I knew I was looking like an absolute fool in front of them, opening and closing my mouth like a fish, my eyes wide and my breath short as I stood there, taking in the two handsome men adorning my doorstep. They were dressed in their Sam and Dean outfits -plaid, over layers of plaid- it seemed like a scene straight out of a set.

“Hi! You’re Y/N right?”, Jared said in his usual husky voice while Jensen stood beside him, strangely staring at me with something akin to awe in his eyes.

“W…what? I…uh…yeah…I…I am Y/N”, I somehow managed to choke out.

“You’re awesome”, Jensen Ackles breathed out with a sigh with literal heart-eyes in my direction. He cleared his throat and blinked twice and then seemed to step out of his reverie. He gave me a small smile and looked me up and down with a small smirk and I blushed furiously. Wait, was Jensen Ackles checking me out?!

Okay, so there were either of these two things going on- either I was dreaming or I had completely lost my mind. But since I had already pinched myself and well, that damn pinch did hurt, so the situation pretty much tilted towards the latter side. I mean, Jensen Ackles knows me and he thinks I am awesome?!

“Yep, definitely not a fan”, Jared whispers somewhat sarcastically to Jensen to which he replies under his breath with a “Shut up, Sammy!”

I would have paid more attention to what Jensen said had I not had my whole focus on Jared’s last words.

“Ummm…..excuse me? No offense but I’m standing right here and you can rest assured that I am 100% a fan, of both of you. If you don’t believe me, ask me anything about Supernatural.”, I say, crossing my hands across my chest.

“Wha-Supernatural? Like the book Supernatural? You have that here too?”, Jensen asks seemingly surprised.

Alright, is this a game for their show? I thought to myself, utterly confused and dazed. They seem to know my name and well, address too and that can be the only logical explanation as to why Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki are here, on my doorstep. But I couldn’t see any cameras nearby. Maybe they were hidden? Maybe I was meant to be taken by surprise? Oh shit, did I just challenge them right now? Was this being filmed? My mind rushed with a million things- ‘Oh god, I must be looking so stupid right now, acting like a blobfish instead of doing anything!’

I opened my mouth to say something, anything at all, when Jared cut through. 

“Ummm I’m sorry, Y/N, but it’s not really a good idea to be standing outside and talking. I promise we’ll explain everything. Can we please come inside and talk?”

“I….uh…..yeah sure. Come inside please.”, I was about to ask what their deal was but changed my mind when I saw Jensen nervously looking around and then back at me, pleadingly. 

I closed the door behind me as they settled on the plush red sofa. I walked across the room and sat on the chair facing them.

“Y/N”, Jared started. “There’s no easy way to say this but I’m Sam Winchester and this is my brother Dean. Like, from Supernatural.”

“Ummm…. I’m aware? Despite your contrary belief, I told you I was a fan.”, I said, confused.

“You’re our fan?!”, Jensen asked, somewhat stunned. “Haha sweetheart, am I living my dream!”, he added, his emerald eyes twinkling.

I stared at him through my eyelashes.

“Hold up, quick question, are you a Dean girl or Sam girl?”

“Dean, not now…..”, Jared sighed.

“Dean girl!”, I blurted out, immediately blushing deeply. Jensen’s entire face lit up and I hurriedly added, “No offense to Jared here.”

“Jared? You mean Jared Pada-whatshisname?”, Jensen asked incredulously.

“Padalecki, Dean”

“Son of a bitch! Fake us lives in the same universe as her!”

I started laughing and the both of them turned towards me quizzically.

“Ummm what is this? Some spin-off of The French Mistake?”, I asked.

“The French what?”, Jared looked at me, his eyebrow raised.

“That’s not important right now. Y/N, I know, it’s hard to believe us right now, but we are not your TV actors-we are not Jensen and Jared. I am the actual Dean Winchester and he is my brother, Sam Winchester. The trickster, the archangel Gabriel, owed us a favor and he let us travel into your universe.... Sweetheart please, you have to believe me. I umm uh, I have been a-”

I stood straight up from my chair, angrily.

“I’m sorry but what kind of prank is this? Going to people’s houses and-”, I started angrily when suddenly the entire room got spontaneously flooded with an immensely bright light.

“Cover your eyes!”, a deep, somewhat robotic voice filled the air and I immediately did so to lessen the risk of my precious peepers being completely burned out by an unknown source of dazzling light in my seemingly normal house in the middle of a seemingly normal (absolutely weird) day.

Slowly, the light faded.

And there stood Misha Collins-

No, that could not possibly be Misha. Unless Misha had suddenly evolved to be able to exhibit bioluminescence or had sprouted long black wings from the back of his trench coat or had learned to hover like a bee in mid-air. No, definitely not Misha. 

That means, this must…this must be-

“Holy mother of God”, I gasped out.

“I….am….not….the….I am the son of God”, he said, walking across the room to sit beside Jar-no, no......Sam.

Holy shit! CASTIEL?! That means that all this time, Jens- Dean, had not been lying. I collapsed on my chair, my mind, not being able to form a single coherent thought. Dean leaped up from the sofa and rushed to my side.

“Darling….darling, look for yourself, that-”

“He is Castiel.”, I said, boring into Dean’s green eyes, they brought me comfort. “I believe you…… Dean.”

A look passed between Sam and Dean and Dean immediately held my hand and squeezed my palm as an act of reassurance as he beamed at me.

Sam got up from his chair and smiled at me, “Thanks to Cas here, you believe us. At last. I thought you were two seconds away from throwing us out.”

I snorted. A really ugly snort through my nose. In front of three delicious-looking men, especially Dean, who was somehow still looking at me like I was God’s gift to mankind. Hah, no wonder I was single.

I cleared my throat to relieve the awkwardness and continued,

“Well, in my defense, you guys were acting real creepy.”

Yeah sure, not even in my wildest dreams would I actually throw Jensen and Jared out of my house, no matter how creepy they act, but they didn’t need to know that.

“But how…why……..”, I started asking the questions bothering me.

“Umm well, yeah, about that…”, Dean started, gulping.

Castiel walked over and looked at me with downcast eyes.

“You are going to die.”, he stated nonchalantly, as if three men entering into your house and telling you that you are going to die is an everyday occurrence.

“I…WHAT?!”, I shouted, my eyes wide.

                                        Now

“CAS!”, Sam and Dean both exclaim at him at the same time.

“She was asking.…..”

“No Cas, not like that!”, Sam tells him prickly.

“Please tell me what the hell is going on! Why….How am I going to die? What’s happening?!”, I say, hiding my face with my hair.

“Darling, promise me you won’t freak out.”, Dean says, staring straight into my soul. “You are a character from a book in our universe. My favourite book. And trust me, this...you…. I am a huge fan of you. Have been, since I was a child. Now you see, few months ago, we stumbled into your universe when Gabriel pranked us. And then I saw you. I met you. The real you....just….perfect….And I just wanted to.....I mean..... I came back...I came back because…..”

“Because?”

“I know everything. I know how the book ends and I have come back here to save you, darling.”

Tagging -  @thatmotleygirl @msmarvelouswinchester @athenapotter @mvdeanw​ @bts-spnlvr12​ @holylulusworld @jensengirl83

[newjenns]

he liked blob dnf kissing...

i read this as blobfish and i went to go look for it and was so sad frowns

[nutongzhi]

this is such a dumb thing but seeing the blobfish with a description like “after extreme tissue damage due to extreme environment changes from fishing” he looks so sad i feel so bad for that fuck ugly fish :^(

[khhpluskpp]

Don’t Leave || Park Seonghwa

Summary: Seonghwa x chubby reader where an article leaks their relationship and reader thinks it’s best they break up

Genre: Some sad angst with a happy ending?

Requested?: Yes! Thank you so much!

Author: Jamie

                  ATEEZ Seonghwa Spotted on Date with Mystery Girl

    That was the headline displayed in bold letters on your screen. You felt your heart stop as you scrolled through the article and saw your face barely blurred out walking into the theater with Seonghwa. How could you have been so stupid? You had gone to a movie theater outside of Seoul that wasn’t usually busy and you thought Ateez was still small enough that you’d be safe but clearly you were wrong. 

    As you scrolled to the end you discovered that the article alone wouldn’t be the only thing to cause you stress today. The comments were filled with horrible comments about your weight. How you looked huge next to Seonghwa and he could do so much better. Even worse were the ones where people were dismissing the article as ridiculous because he would never go for someone like you. 

    A tear dropped down your cheek that you didn’t realize had been forming. You locked your phone, placed it on the table and went to lay in your bed, pulling the covers up to your chin. All you wanted to do was hide away from the world so you closed your eyes and tried to sleep to make time pass faster. A few more tears fell despite your best efforts as you finally fell asleep.

    When you woke up you felt arms wrapped around you. You knew it was Seonghwa and for a second you relaxed into his embrace but then you remembered the article and the comments and sat up abruptly. You heard a mumbled, “Where are you going?” from Seonghwa as you got up to turn on the light.

    “Babe, what are you doing? Let’s go back to sleep,” he grumbled, covering his eyes to avoid the light. 

    “We need to talk,” you said simply. That got his attention as he sat up quickly and stared at you with wide eyes. 

    “What’s wrong?” If he was asking that you assumed he hadn’t seen the article. To be honest, you were glad he hadn’t because you knew he’d tell you that you were being ridiculous but you knew you had to do this. It was best for him and his groups future. 

    “We need to break up,” you said and your tears ignored your efforts to stay strong in front of him as they fell down your face. Seonghwa was off the bed and standing in front of you before you could even blink. He cupped your face in both hands and looked into your eyes. You could see the tears building in his own so you closed your eyes, knowing that seeing him cry like that would break you down. 

    “Y/N, no. I’m so confused. What happened? What did I do wrong? I can fix it, I swear,” hearing the desperation in his voice caused you to start sobbing. You dropped to the floor as you cried into your hands. Seonghwa sat behind you and wrapped his arms around you, laying his head on the back of your shoulder. “Baby, please, talk to me. What’s going on?” he whispered softly.

   “I’m not good for you. I’m gonna mess up your whole future if you stay with me,” you choked out between sobs, “I’m not good enough for you.”

   “Are you serious? You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. You are my future, I want you with me every step of the way. Where is this coming from?” You turned around to look at him and saw that his eyes were already red and puffy from crying. He wiped your tears away and waited patiently for you to talk.

    “There’s… there’s an article…” you whispered casting your gaze towards the floor and picking at the carpeting.

    “What article?” he asked as he furrowed his brows in confusion.

    You sighed, going to get your phone and then sitting next to him again. After unlocking your phone you handed it to him and watched his eyes as he skimmed through the page. As he read the article he seemed strangely calm but as he got further down he was filled with a mixture of anger and sadness. He calmed himself down, though, before he talked to you again. “Is this why you want to break up?” 

    “This could be really bad for you. Plus they’re right, it doesn’t make sense for you to be with me. Look at you,” you gestured toward him, “You’re like a living statue and I’m a blobfish.”

    Seonghwa laughed a little at that before becoming serious again when you glared at him, “I’m sorry. The blobfish image was just funny. But you’re wrong. I think you’re absolutely gorgeous. Who cares if society wants to make you think you’re too big? You’re healthy and as far as I know happy. That’s all that matters. And I won’t let some shitty peoples shitty opinions get in the way of me being with the love of my life. We can figure out the stuff with the article later but for right now I just wanna know if you actually want to break up with me or if you’re just doing it because of the article and the comments,”

    “I want to be with you. I love you, Seonghwa. But what are we going to do about this?” 

    “We’ll worry about that tomorrow. For now, I need to go back to sleep cuddling my gorgeous girlfriend because this has been a rough night for both of us. How does that sound?” He asked, holding your face gently. 

    “I think that sounds really good right now.” You smiled and he leaned forward to kiss you softly. He stood up and gave you a hand to pull you up with him, guiding you to the bed before turning off the light and joining you.

    “I love you so much,” he whispered, kissing your shoulder and wrapping his arms around you.

    “I love you too.”