#he was not gonna be able to jump but then he vaulted over the backside of the set instead

[svtskneecaps]

i'm extremely amused by my own reaction to certain aspects of stage shows bc i saw a production of newsies and pulitzer was DAMN good like he very much ate that scene where they corner jack kelly in the office before the rally, absolutely legendary acting however it also meant that i wanted to knock his teeth in.

like "fuck you you're doing a great job i'm gonna rearrange your organs well done"

[sp00kworm]

Can I maybe... ask for... some 😏 with Drifter? Like reader comes back from a super long mission for his least favorite people I.e Vanguard and he’s just relieved she’s alright and some adult things happen... 😉

Pairing: The Drifter x Female Reader

Warnings: Adult Content below the cut

---

The Snitch

You smelled like Vex milk and swamps. Io was the single most annoying planet to visit when the Vex decided to try build new spires or fight tiny wars with the Taken. You’d spent the past week searching through the Pyramidion for a single piece of important data. A location of another, vaulted small Warmind. It had never been finished in its construction, but the Vew were looking to scavenge final pieces of its data input. They wanted old strongholds and access to weaponry that was never fired. Stopping them had been a task. A week of shooting, running and tearing open the middle of many robots before you’d managed to access the Warmind and properly vault the data before destroying it, blowing the old AI up with a mass of scavenged charges from the area. It was sad to see such ancient technology gone, but you booted up your tablets and laughed at the AI fiddling with the programs and building itself a little home in your information.

‘The world that I was never able to see – Delilah’

It would no doubt be a bad idea, but you’d gotten into the habit of defying what the Vanguard told you to do. The AI was toned down thanks to your own work, no longer a program for killing, but a small snippet of the personality that enjoyed simply organising data. Hopefully it wouldn’t backfire in your face.

 “Guardian. Report.” Zavala woke you up from your ship controls. You jolted awake in the leather chair and groaned at the pain in your back. Your Ghost flitted into being and answered the Titan.

“We’re here…Sorry. She was mid-nap.” He laughed awkwardly as you pushed fingers into your back, attempting to rid yourself of the burning pain. Ghost tutted and set to healing the muscles as you patted your cheeks to wake yourself up.

With a deep breath you opened the communication link properly, “Commander.” You addressed, voice thick with sleep.

“I trust you were successful in stopping the Vex’s attempts to access Warmind data?” He snapped. In the background you could hear Ikora talking over something with someone. It was a council meeting.

You yawned and scrubbed at your hair, “Yep. The Warmind is gone. I had to blow it up before leaving. Most of the Vex created were wiped out and the data you requested has been wiped and salvaged.” You yawned again as you sat back, your Ghost taking over automatic piloting of your ship once more, “I’ll be back within the day.”

“Very good, Guardian. Safe journeys.” The line closed with a click and you groaned at the sharp Commander, making faces at your Ghost as you headed back towards the Tower.

 Your scolding and general debrief under Zavala had gone on far longer than you wanted. They’d wanted everything destroyed. Delilah observed that Zavala was a hardass from inside your helmet, and you had just enough willpower not to break down laughing as he signed paperwork and muttered. You knew that one person in particular would be upset with you. The Drifter, as everyone named him, would be furious that you had ignored his messages in favour of heading to the debrief. You signed off for the night as Delilah pottered around your tablet, sorting data and growing interested in your private messages.

“Delilah. Out of those please.” You hissed at the tablet as you tried to craft a message for the man who was never in one place for too long. He wouldn’t be by the recaster at the moment, not with the slight of being blatantly ignored for the day.

‘Curious images – Delilah’

“DELILAH PLEASE!” You closed all the tabs and huffed at the repurposed artificial intelligence, “Can you send The Drifter a message, please? Tell him to meet me around the back of the Hangar. He’ll know where I mean.” The AI typed a message and you sighed as she signed it with her own name then yours.

‘Look alive, sunshine. I’m at the door already.’

You jumped at the voice message from the couch and growled at the laughter behind your door. The small apartment seemed smaller as you opened the door to the rogue.

 “Did ya miss me?” The man swaggered in, thumbs tucked into his sash belt as he moved into your entry way and looked at the couch, “Because to me,” He flicked a coin and snapped it upwards, tucking it back into his sleeve, “It comes across like you don’t want to see me at all.” He huffed, running a hand through his dark hair in frustration, “That damn Vanguard has had you from me for a week, kitten!” He snapped as he pulled his gun out of his sash, laying the hand cannon on the side with a metallic clank, “They better have had a good reason or so help me…” He flung his arms out and snarled, “I’ll take my concerns to Zavala, and that ain’t gonna be pretty, you bet.”

“LISTEN TO ME!” You snapped at him, holding up your tablet to show the reports, “I had to destroy an ancient warmind and wrestle a future from the Vex and all you can speak to me about is how long I was gone?” You tossed the tablet at him, “Spare me the lecture, Drifter. I haven’t got time for your old man peacocking!”

Fury turned into sadness on his face before he lamented, “I’m sorry, kitten.” He apologised gruffly, “I shouldn’t have raised my voice… but I…They have you more than I ever do. I’m sick of listening to them whittle on and on about my operations while they run their Guardian’s ragged.

“That’s because I work for the Vanguard, Drifter.” You stood in front of him with a scowl, “Not you.”

 The anger and upset disappeared with a lazy smirk before he leaned back against your countertop, “That’s because you decided snitching on my operation was worth more than my feelings.” He teased, “Well, snitching utterly wrong information that is.” He reached a gloved hand and dragged you closer by the hips, pressing you up against his hard front where guns and assorted buckles dragged against your skin. His hands gripped tightly at your backside as you squirmed, unhappy with the sudden arrangement.

“Snitching the wrong information to save your backside.” You huffed as he pushed your mouths together, needy, hungrily for a taste of his mouth. His facial hair was abrasive against your chin and cheeks as he pushed his tongue against your lips teasingly.

“More because it means you don’t have to put a gun to my head.” He hissed against you ear, “And you won’t have to try and pull the trigger.” The Drifter hitched you upwards, fingers reaching to pull away your bottoms down your thighs.

You pushed aside his scarves and the high collar of his coat to expose enough skin to deliver a harsh nip to his neck, “I wouldn’t miss if I did.” You teased, even as naughty, rough fingers, moved to slide against your opening, testing the slickness between your thighs.

The Drifter watched you drag open his trousers and smirked, “Hmm. A discussion for another time.” He teased as your hips collided roughly, “Right now, I think I have to show you just how much I’ve missed you.”

[thezeekrecord]

Now You’re Thinking With Portals, Gordon! ch5

[index/summary]

True Purpose

One minute, Gordon had been falling into a seemingly bottomless pit with an overwhelming sense of impending doom looming over him. The next, he was lying in a shallow puddle, staring up at the sad remnants of a broken elevator that hung dangerously from a thick cable. Gordon jolted upright in a panic, leaping to his feet and immediately collapsing onto his backside. He groaned and rubbed his temples as everything that happened the past few hours flooded back to him.

“Ah! Gordon, you’re awake!” Coomer said, stepping in front of him and holding out a hand. “Are you feeling alright?”

“Uhh, yeah, I guess so.” Gordon replied, accepting Coomer’s hand. Coomer pulled him up to his feet with ease. “How long was I out?”

“Well, you passed out at the start of our fall, and you remained that way as we looked for VOX, so...I would say about 10 minutes.”

“Do you know how hard it is to rearrange everyone while you fall just so the bastard who passed out wouldn’t die?” Bubby complained, holding Tommy as he made his way over the wreckage to join Gordon and Coomer.

“I saved you with my robot body!” Coomer boasted.

“Oh god, that really could’ve been it for me.” Gordon breathed, putting a hand to his head.

“Now, we’re all trapped in...wherever this is.” Bubby griped.

“This is the condemned section.” Tommy informed them with a worried look. “Nobody’s supposed to be here, anymore. It’s too dangerous.”

“Well, I don’t know, it seems calmer down here than it was up there.” Gordon pointed out, picking through the debris and peering down what looked like a path. “Did you find VOX, by the way?”

“I’m here.” VOX replied. Coomer scooped him up from behind a chunk of concrete, revealing shards of metal that had buried themselves into his core.

“Damn, that doesn’t look good.” Gordon winced.

“It’s not.”

“Are we really going to take him with us?” Bubby questioned. “He did try to kill us.”

“I am incapable of doing anything in this state.” VOX pointed out. “Not to mention I have valuable information about the facility’s layout. You will certainly need my assistance getting back up to the modern section in order to take control back from Benry.”

“I mean, what about Tommy? He seems to know plenty about this place.” Gordon suggested, looking to Tommy in Bubby’s arms.

“I only know a little bit about why it was condemned.” Tommy admitted sheepishly. “I think VOX is right. We’ll probably need his help.”

“Is there even a way back up to the facility? Other than this...broken elevator?” Gordon asked.

“There are two entry points to the true condemned section that I am aware of. If we make our way to the topmost entry point, it is possible we will be able to return to the modern section of the facility.” VOX explained. “I presume it will take a long time to get ourselves there, though. Time we may not have.”

“I feel like we’ve been beating the odds of survival pretty much all day already. Call me crazy, but I think we might just make it out of this one.” Gordon said, leading the way down away from the elevator.

“Statistically improbable.”

“Hey, if you’re gonna commit to the bit about us needing you to get out, you should at least try to be positive about our chances, dude.”

“...Improbable, but there is a slim possibility.”

“Yeah, that’s the spirit.”

As they moved through the wreckage of the facility, Bubby passed Tommy off to Gordon to create paths for the group with his portal gun. At first, Gordon would have thought the wreckage was caused by the tremors above them, but thick layers of dust coated everything in sight. Large chunks of rusted metal and drywall that might have been part of walls and pipes were scattered all over, some half-buried in the dirt beneath their feet. Soon, after squeezing through many awkward paths, they entered a clearing blocked off by an automatic gate. Gordon jiggled the gate before turning to a large switch next to it. When he flipped it, several lights above boomed to life to reveal a massive circular vault door at the end of the clearing with two little box rooms on opposite sides of the vault. Upon investigation, they found each room contained a button labeled “HATCH RECLUSION OVERRIDE”—after some bickering, Coomer passed VOX to Gordon, who struggled to hold both him and Tommy as Bubby and Coomer split off to the separate rooms. Once the buttons were pressed simultaneously, the hatch unlocked, an ear-splitting siren sounding as the door was lifted out of the way by cables. Gordon squeezed his eyes shut, unable to plug his ears as the siren blared for what felt like several long minutes before everything finally fell silent. He opened his eyes, finding the only thing behind the vault had been a couple discarded chairs and an underwhelmingly normal door.

“This is it.” VOX announced. “Once we enter, we will be in the true condemned section. I am not fully aware of what is waiting for us in here. We will need to be careful.”

Gordon steeled himself and pushed the door open. Beyond that was an even larger clearing, similar to what Gordon was used to seeing above in the space between test chambers. Huge, broken structures towered above them, mostly indistinct in the darkness of the cavern; as another distant tremor hit, small bits of rock splashed into the water surrounding their little walkway. They maneuvered into a small, cramped hallway, where Gordon threw another switch to open an automatic door leading into a smaller section of the cavern. As the doors slid open and Gordon led the way in, lights blinked on, and a booming, proud voice echoed around them with triumphant music.

“Welcome, gentlemen, to Aperture Science.” The voice began. Gordon recognized it in an instant—he’d never met the man himself, but he practically haunted the facility through old promotional videos and pre-recorded messages that were regularly played for the current Aperture employees. A Pavlovian dread response filled Gordon as they proceeded further into the chamber. “Astronauts, war heroes, Olympians—you’re here because we want the best, and you are it. So, who’s ready to make some science?”

There was a brief pause in the recording before another familiar voice spoke. “Oh—me!”

At first, Gordon couldn’t even place where he’d heard the voice before. He just squinted as he listened closer, struggling to process the words over the echo.

“Now, you already met one another on the limo ride over, so let me introduce myself: I’m Cave Johnson. I own the place. That eager voice you heard is my assistant Tommy. Rest assured, he has transferred your honorarium to the charitable organization of your choice. Isn’t that right, Tommy?”

“...Yeah.”

Gordon looked instinctively down at Tommy, who stared up towards the ceiling blankly as Cave rambled on briefly about how without Tommy, Aperture wouldn’t be what it was today. The recording ended shortly, leaving the entire group in silence to watch Tommy’s reaction.

“...Huh?” Was all Tommy said.

“Dude, was that you?” Gordon finally asked, glancing between the two cores in his arms.

“...I don’t...n-no, that couldn’t have been me.” Tommy denied, looking down with a perplexed expression. “I can’t—I don’t remember that. I never met Cave Johnson, he died before I was created.”

VOX looked to Tommy, like he was ready to say something, but they stopped as a smaller voice called from somewhere above them. “Hello? Who are you?”

Gordon looked up to what appeared to be a pedestrian entrance further into the facility built into a high part of the cave wall, the walkway leading up to it long broken. At first, he thought it must have been another version of Coomer—but as he looked closer, he found the round head set in the center of his body was a core with a deep orange eye.

“Is that...” Bubby started.

“Darnold?” Coomer finished.

“What are you all doing down here?” He bent over and grabbed something by his feet, throwing it over the handrail—a rope ladder with metal hooks tied to the ends. He attached it to the rail carefully before simply jumping over it, landing easily on his feet to meet the group.

“We thought you were incinerated!” Bubby said, approaching Darnold. “What happened to you? Why are you in one of Coomer’s bodies?”

“Well, it’s an interesting story.” Darnold began before his eye locked with VOX’s. “Buuuut...is that...VOX?”

“Darnold.”

Darnold paused for a long time before simply turning to the rope ladder and beginning to scale back up.

“Wait!” Gordon called out. “I think maybe you can help us!”

“I’m fairly busy at the moment, actually, Mr...”

“Freeman.”

“Yes, I’m rather busy right now, Mr. Freeman.” Darnold continued, already halfway up the ladder. “I’ve been extremely busy being very much alive down here. It takes up a lot of my schedule, you see, and I’d like to get back to that.”

Gordon hurriedly redistributed VOX and Tommy to Bubby and Coomer before running to join Darnold on the ladder. “Wait, at least hear me out! Do you have any idea what’s going on up there?”

Darnold reached the top and swung himself expertly over the handrail, looking down in disappointment at Gordon as he climbed up. “No, I don’t. I haven’t been up there in a very long time.”

“The facility is gonna blow up if we don’t fix Tommy!” Gordon explained, clumsily pulling himself over the handrail. “Some guy told me that Tommy was supposed to run the facility. He told me a ‘condemned AI’ could help me find a USB that’s supposed to fix him. You’re an AI in the condemned section, you must be the one he was talking about, right?”

“Well, I don’t know about all that.” Darnold said uneasily. “This is the first I’m hearing about any of this. I mean, I know about Tommy already at least, that all makes sense...”

“It does not.”

“You were an engineering sphere, Darnold!” Coomer called to him. “Wouldn’t you say you have the ability to fix Tommy?”

“Ehhhh...I mean, I could look.” Darnold offered tentatively. “But I don’t think I’m gonna be much help. That sounds like it’s a little out of my expertise, and I haven’t done any work on cores in a while. I’m a little rusty, if you’ll forgive the pun.”

“I won’t.” Bubby said.

“But I don’t know how comfortable I am with VOX knowing where I stay.” Darnold went on, crossing his arms defensively. Another tremor hit above them, shaking layers of dirt from the ceiling into Gordon’s hair.

“Darnold. We are in a hurry. I would like to get back to the upper facility, and I am unable to do that on my own, leaving me at the whims of Gordon Freeman. Please do what he says so I can return to my facility.”

Darnold didn’t look swayed by this. Gordon let out a frustrated sigh.

“It’s okay, he’s not gonna get control back.” Gordon comforted. “He’s right, though, we kinda have to hurry, or Benry’s gonna destroy the facility.”

“You put Benry in charge?” Darnold asked incredulously. “Well, no wonder the facility’s in danger. He’s a corrupted core, he can’t handle that kind of responsibility.”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m seeing that.” Gordon said flatly. “Listen, could you please just try? I kinda don’t wanna die, and it sounds like you don’t, either.”

“Ohhh, alright.” Darnold caved, motioning Bubby and Coomer up.

After maneuvering everyone up to the platform, Gordon took Tommy again, and Darnold led the group inside an old waiting room that must have been very comfortable back in the day—unlike the waiting room for testing that Gordon had gotten accustomed to seeing. As they passed through, another pre-recorded message from Cave Johnson filled the room. He prattled on about the mechanics of his pre-recorded messages and a few old tests they must have been running at the time.

“Ugh. Sorry about him.” Darnold grumbled. “I can usually turn him off, but if the power gets reset, he turns back on automatically. I’ve heard these recordings about a million times. Listen, he’s about to say something about mantis men.”

As promised, Cave announced a new project for the test subjects—fighting an army of mantis men. Gordon stopped at an old framed painting of Cave Johnson. He was young in this portrait, probably in his late 30’s, with a proud, hopeful smile on his face. Tommy looked at it wordlessly.

“You sure you don’t remember any of this?” Gordon asked him. “That really sounded like you.”

“No, Mr. Freeman, there’s no way.”

Gordon jogged to catch up with the group, and they continued down various paths that Darnold seemed to have set up himself between the wreckage. He moved with ease as Gordon picked his way through carefully, slowing the group down significantly.

“So what happened to you?” Bubby asked Darnold again as they walked.

“Well...” Darnold cast an uneasy glance at VOX. “I had been fixing broken versions of you two for a long time, among other things. It was the same thing every single day. I fix you up, you go to a test chamber, you get smashed to pieces, I fix you up again, and the cycle repeated. It got pretty boring.”

“Yeah, for you. ” Bubby muttered.

“I was doing my usual maintenance when one of the Coomers came through. I guess something went wrong with one of the laser tests. He was just burned clean in half.”

“That’ll happen.” Coomer said solemnly.

“The core part was totally fried, so he qualified to get recycled. The rest of the body was fine, though.” Darnold continued, leading the group into a room with three massive pipes extending into the ceiling. He motioned them up a makeshift metal ladder that looked like it had been welded to the bottom of a broken catwalk. “I got curious how easy it would be to make my own body out of it. My rationalization at the time was that it would make it easier to work if I had my own hands, but really, I just wanted something else to do. I succeeded in attaching myself to the Coomer body, but VOX wasn't a fan.”

Gordon looked pointedly at VOX, who remained silent. The group moved into an old workspace with three separate consoles with switches.

“I think he was trying to incinerate me, but instead, he sent me down a pit that landed me here.” Darnold finished, stopping to look at the group with what looked like it could be an excited smile. “And this is where I found my true purpose.”

Darnold turned to the switches, throwing them all in quick succession. Mechanical whirring filled the room as the pipes came to life. Darnold enthusiastically urged them all to follow, leading them out to a wide open space where the remnants of what seemed to be an old test chamber sat. It was too destroyed to show what they had been testing for, leaving just a floor and chunks of wall that had been partially ripped away, but there was a mess of what looked like hardened blue, orange, and white paint caked over every available surface in it.

“This is what flows through the pipes.” Darnold informed them, squeezing through a bit in the wall that had been torn out to provide access into the chamber. “Go ahead, try it out.”

Gordon stepped in tentatively as Tommy looked around in dismay.

“This isn’t supposed to be used, anymore!” He said worriedly. “It was left behind with the condemned section! It’s too dangerous to work with!”

“But this much more fascinating than lasers or portals!” Darnold argued. “See? Watch!”

Darnold leapt onto a patch of blue and shot high into the air. He bounced a few times this way before landing back on a patch of white, looking quite pleased with himself.

“Whoa, that was nuts!” Gordon gasped. He hesitated for a brief moment before trying it himself. He laughed loudly as he bounced several times, quickly joined enthusiastically by Coomer, who was currently holding VOX.

“This is a waste of time.” VOX reminded them. “This technology was left behind for a reason. We must move on if we are to survive, Gordon Freeman.”

Gordon landed heavily onto a patch of orange, excitement draining from him as he remembered their responsibilities. “Right, okay. Yeah, Darnold, this is cool and all, but there’s still the crisis up there.”

Darnold looked heavily disappointed. “Alright, my lab is just over here.” He sighed.

As Gordon moved to follow, he thought for a moment he must have been shoved by someone—he took one small step forward, but he practically launched across the chamber. He skidded to a stop on the white, looking down to the patch of orange in shock.

“Oh, yeah, that’s the propulsion gel.” Darnold explained as they exited the chamber the way they’d entered. “There’s the propulsion gel, repulsion gel, and conversion gel, which allows you to shoot portals on any surface you cover it with. Then, of course, there’s another special little somethin’ I’ve been working on.”

Darnold explained the science behind the gel extensively as they headed towards a box room high above them, placed beside another suspended chamber. He directed them up through his maze of makeshift paths until they reached an office space, currently occupied by Darnold’s projects. Laid out on one of the desks were several containers with various liquids, the largest one filled with a thick, purple gel. On another to the right, there was a fairly modern computer—modern by Gordon’s standards, at least—with what appeared to be a jury-rigged receptacle to plug cores into.

“How long have you been down here?” Gordon asked, eyes landing on a tarp that covered a pile of what he assumed to be the old supplies that originally occupied the room.

“Oh, a good few years.” Darnold replied casually. He held out his arms towards Gordon. “I’ll take a look at Tommy, but like I said, no promises.”

Gordon passed Tommy to him, who was then plugged roughly into the receptacle. Tommy’s eye glowed brighter, blinking a couple times while Darnold typed away at his computer. He squinted his eye as he navigated through several windows, leaning in close to his screen with a perplexed look. Seeing this was going to take a while, Gordon glanced around the room, spotting hints of a chair underneath the tarp. He eagerly pulled the tarp up to unearth it, dragging the chair out carefully before something caught his eye further in. He glanced back at Darnold, who was still fully focused on Tommy, so he pulled the tarp away to extract a large frame out from the mess of old office supplies.

“What do you have there, Gordon?” Coomer asked as Gordon flipped it over.

Gordon stared at the painting. It was another portrait of Cave Johnson, much older now and sat at his desk, but standing behind him with his hands clasped in front of him was a white man in his late 50’s. His jet black hair was neatly groomed back, and he wore a long white lab coat with a blue button-up and striped tie. Gordon thought for a moment the man looked familiar, but quickly dismissed it as he read the golden plaque at the bottom: “CAVE JOHNSON & TOMMY COOLATTA”.

“...Another portrait.” Gordon answered, turning to show it to Coomer.

“Ah, the founder and CEO of Aperture Science.” Coomer identified with a nod.

“Yeah, but look at the guy with him.” Gordon pointed at Tommy. “Do you guys know anything about him?”

“No, not really.” Bubby replied, glancing back at Tommy. “We don’t come equipped with a full history of Aperture Science, Gordon.”

“What is it?” Tommy asked from the desk.

Gordon nudged past Bubby and Coomer, watching Tommy’s reaction over the top of the portrait. Tommy stared at it for a long moment before there was a large zap , and his eye immediately went dark, closing tight as smoke billowed from him and the receptacle.

“Wh—Tommy?!” Gordon exclaimed, setting the portrait aside.

“Aw, jeez.” Darnold groaned, pulling him from the receptacle and turning him over. “I guess he got overwhelmed and shorted out.”

“Is he gonna be okay?” Gordon asked, leaning in to look at Tommy.

“Yeah, he should be alright.” Darnold reassured him, setting him down on the desk. “I can’t actually access his program, though. I tried, but I kept getting errors.”

“Do you think it’s an issue with your computer?” Gordon suggested.

“Well, let’s see.” Darnold reached out for VOX. Coomer handed him over without hesitation.

“Do not get into my program.” VOX commanded.

“I’m not gonna, I’m just checking if I can.”

“Do not. Do not. Do not.” VOX repeated as Darnold positioned him over the receptacle.

Darnold stopped and pulled him away. “Alright, alright. I’ll just test it with myself.” He handed VOX back to Coomer and unlatched the face of the receptacle, setting it aside. He pulled out the pin that plugged into the back of the core, connected to a wire that snaked around the desk. He blindly reached to plug it into himself, and his eye glowed slightly brighter, just the same as Tommy’s had. He turned to the computer again, pulling up programming files with complex lines of text. “Well, it’s working just fine for me.”

“...Huh?” Tommy spoke suddenly. His eye was open only halfway for a moment before he opened it fully, looking at everyone around the room. “What happened?”

“You shorted out.” Darnold informed him. “Tommy, is there a reason I can’t access your program?”

Tommy was quiet for a moment, looking as though he was still catching up before he spoke. “Oh, yeah...I remember now...there’s only one receptacle in the facility that lets you do that.”

“And you didn’t think to mention it?” Bubby questioned flatly.

“It’s been a long time since anyone’s needed to access my files.” Tommy said. “It was only before we phased out human employees that it ever came up.”

“Well, that doesn’t bode well for you guys.” Darnold commented as he disconnected himself and replaced the cover on the receptacle. “I could try to bypass it, but I get the feeling it might be faster to just get you to the right station and do it there.”

“No, I...I think we’re missing something.” Gordon shook his head, leaning on the desk. “The guy didn’t say you’d be the one to fix Tommy. He said we’d come down here, and you’d give me something that helped me find the USB drive.”

“Who even is this guy you’re referring to?” Darnold questioned doubtfully. “No offense, Mr. Freeman, but I don’t think the problem is so simple, it could be solved with whatever’s on a tiny little USB drive. That’s not how that works, you know. If the issue is processing power, that’s more of a hardware issue than anything else.”

“I don’t know!” Gordon exclaimed, burying his face in his hands. “I don’t know who the guy was, I don’t know why a USB is supposed to help, but things have lined up so far! He said Tommy was supposed to run the facility, which makes sense, and he said we’d find you after I disconnected Tommy. And it’s not like I know of anything else to do, here.”

“You could give me back my facility.” VOX suggested.

“Bro, you know that’s not happening.”

“Hmmm.” Darnold put a hand to the face of his core thoughtfully. “Well, I don’t know about all that, but you’re welcome to look through some of this old stuff I’ve collected. There might be something useful in there.”

Darnold indicated back to the pile of old supplies. Gordon headed over and started picking his way through, followed quickly by Bubby. The pile mostly consisted of old office supplies like Gordon had initially thought; he was ready to give up when Bubby suddenly dragged something out that looked very much like it did not belong in the pile. It was a massive, shelf-sized black console that had been facing towards the wall; there was a black screen and several buttons with a dial, looking almost like an arcade cabinet with a weird hose with a nozzle on the end hooked on the side.

“What’s this thing?” Bubby asked, holding the nozzle up for Darnold to see.

“Oh, that thing?” Darnold approached, looking at it closer. “I’m not sure. I saw it lying around here, but it didn’t have anything to do with the gel, so...you’re welcome to try it, though.”

Bubby found a place to plug the machine in and stood at the controls, clicking a few buttons experimentally as Gordon hovered over his shoulder. The screen blinked to life, reading “SELECT A TARGET” in green text against a black screen. Bubby immediately turned to point the nozzle at Gordon.

“Hey, hey, don’t test it on me!” Gordon yelped.

Bubby didn’t respond, simply watching as the screen changed. There was a long, green line graph now; as Bubby clicked the dial to the side, a time and date displayed at the top. It only changed by day-long increments, but as Bubby scrolled way back, there didn’t seem to be a limit on how far back it could go.

“I think this is what you were looking for.” Bubby said thoughtfully. “This might be able to send you back in time.”

“What? A fucking time machine?” Gordon asked incredulously. “There’s no way in hell we made a time machine and, like, survived. Aperture wouldn’t just drop a project like that, right? We would’ve sold it to the public for a fortune by now and had all time wiped out by people, like, trying to save the Titanic or whatever.”

“Well,” Darnold began, but he was cut off by a massive flash of green light, similar to when he’d been teleported by the man in the suit. Gordon blinked several times and shook his head, his eyes taking a few seconds to readjust. He was in the same room as before, but he didn’t find the man in the suit like he had expected—in fact, nobody but him was there now; it was all arranged just like a normal workspace he would come to expect from Aperture. Gordon peered out the window, down at the old remnants of the test chamber they’d just been in. It wasn’t half destroyed, he found—it was half built, with construction workers milling about below. Gordon gripped his chest.

“Oh, fuck.”

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