#he's doing a fantastic job with Scout too

[charmwasjess]

I've been really excited about Yoda: Dark Rendezvous coming to the Essential Legends Collection, particularly in audiobook, since there never an audiobook version made back in the day when it first came out. Then I totally forgot it was happening this (last) month until I saw @jewishcissiekj's awesome posts about it.

Anyway, I decided to start a re-read via audiobook because my boy Jonathan Davis is narrating and I liked how he did Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan in Master & Apprentice. He really got Liam Neeson and Ewan McGregor vibes in there, even if he made Rael into a bizarre cowboy. (Which I actually have come to love.)

And... And... I'm going to cry. I just hit the water skeeter "every Jedi is a child a parent decided they could live without" scene and... 😭😭He's really trying to do YOUNG Christopher Lee's voice for the flashback scenes.

Like, okay, this 19 year old has the deepest voice of any 19 year old in existence, but still.

[lipglossanon]

Red Flags and Long Nights

Real Dad!Leon S. Kennedy x daughter fem!reader (one shot)

hello hello 👋 this is the fic written for the milestone celebration poll winner (real dad taking accidental viagra); big big thanks to all of you who have gotten me here!! 💜 💜 I’m so thankful everyday that you guys choose to read/like/share/interact with my fics and just me in general! 🥰 so without further ado, I hope you enjoy this one shot!!!

WARNINGS: 18+ MDNI, INCEST, dead dove content, dad/daughter incest, groping, slight cnc, dirty talk, breast play, oral (m receiving), kissing, teasing, unprotected sex, creampie

not proofread 😅 some of it was written while sleepy so hopefully it makes sense haha

title from Red Flags and Long Nights from She Wants Revenge

<<prequel: Oh By Gosh, By Golly>>

One day, your mom calls you up out of the blue wanting to talk about planning a family vacation this year. Somewhere with sandy beaches and clear blue water. Something over an extended weekend once everyone can take off work. She’s already talked it over with your dad and he’s agreeable as long as it doesn’t cost an arm and a leg. 

As she talks, you pull open your calendar and look over your work schedule. Once you find a date that works, she promises to text you the details of the Air B&B she plans to book. You bid her goodbye and hang up the phone, quietly excited about a beach trip even if it is with your parents. 

You keep busy as you slowly count down the days; long graduated from college but still struggling to find work in your major, you’ve had to settle for any job opportunity that will pay the bills. Luckily enough, you were hired to work at the local post office. It’s not a glamorous job by any means, but you do get federal holidays off and your boss is pretty lenient with you. It’s a cinch to put in your PTO for the extended weekend you plan to spend with your parents. 

The morning you drive down to the beach house is pleasant; it’s early enough you miss out on a bunch of traffic which helps you save enough time to splurge a little and grab some coffee. Following the GPS, you get to the beach house in the afternoon with plenty of sunshine left to enjoy. Your parent’s car is already parked outside so you don’t have to worry about figuring out how to unlock the joint.

You grab your small suitcase and make your way into the lovely three story home. As you walk up the gravel sidewalk, you take in how secluded the area truly is and how lucky your mom was in getting such a nice place. You’re pretty sure it cost out the ass, but hey who’re you to deny such generosity?

The door swings open before you touch the handle and your mom pulls you into a hug. 

“Oh honey, I’m so happy you could make it!”

Breathing in the perfume embedded into your brain from childhood, you give her a quick squeeze back before pulling away. 

“Me too,” you smile, “this place is amazing!”

She laughs and moves further into the house, looking back as you follow along behind after closing the door. 

“A friend of a friend owns this place so it was pretty easy to get. Even your father can’t throw one of his little hissy fits about the cost,” she rolls her eyes and you breathe out a laugh. 

“Where is he?” You look around but only see the open kitchen leading off into the dining room. 

“Down at the beach,” she points to the sliding glass doors on the other side of the living room, “I told him I wanted to stay up here for when you arrived.”

You nod and smile at her again, “Thanks, I appreciate it. I’m gonna go put my stuff up and change then we can head down ourselves.”

She nods, “There’s a handful of bedrooms on the second and third floor. Your dad and I are staying in the master down here so you have your choice of rooms.”

“Nice, be back in a sec,” grabbing your luggage, you climb the stairs to scout out where you want to sleep. 

You pick a cute room on the third floor; it has a little balcony with a couple of chairs that gives you a fantastic view for miles around. You toss your clothes into the dresser and quickly change into your swimsuit. Grabbing a towel and some sunscreen, you slide on your sandals and make your way back downstairs. Your mom, wearing a big floppy hat, is already standing outside the sliding doors. 

You chatter with each other, just catching up on your day to day, while you both make your way down the little path that leads out onto the beach. As soon as your sandals hit the sand, you see a huge beach umbrella. 

“Glad to know he won’t burn,” your mom laughs, toeing off her own sandals to walk barefoot over to your dad. 

Following her lead, you take off your sandals and carry them over to the blanket underneath the shade of the umbrella. 

“‘Bout time,” a groggy baritone meets your ears. 

“Shush, Leon, it didn’t kill you to nap on the beach now did it?”

Your dad just mumbles a reply to your mom before raising up. He squints over at you, eyes heavy lidded from sleep as you set your stuff down. 

“The drive okay?”

You laugh and finally look over at him, “It was fine.”

His blue eyes sharpen as they read your expression before darting down to give you a once over. Your nipples tighten against your will and his gaze seems to linger there for a split second before flicking back up to your face. Plastering on a fake smile, you sit down and grab your sunscreen. 

“Want some help with that?” Your dad nods to the little bottle in your hands. 

“S-sure.”

You kinda hope the ground splits open to swallow you whole, but instead you just move over to where your dad is sitting up on the blanket, hand outstretched to grab the sunscreen. 

“Well while you two do that, I’m going to go take a dip,” your mom beams at you, completely leaving you alone to wallow in this newfound awkwardness. 

Keeping your back to your dad, you feel his broad calloused palms drag the slick lotion all over your back and shoulders, deftly massaging it in. For the last few years, there’s been a line of tension between you and Leon. An accidental kiss under the mistletoe where you both used too much tongue to be appropriate (any tongue isn’t appropriate but you’re blaming the alcohol everyone had been drinking).  

Since then, you’ve both watched the other. Glances too heated to be innocent, brushing against each other unnecessarily… and now with his sun warmed hands rubbing across your back, your brain empties as your body buzzes with arousal.

It’s why it takes a second for you to realize that your dad has moved on to rubbing in the sunblock across your ribs and over your clavicle. His hands come up and cup your breasts, stiff nipples showing through the fabric. 

“Gotta make sure to get everywhere,” his breath gusts past your ear as his hands slip under your top and massages the fat of your breasts. 

“Ohh,” you whimper quietly, cunt pulsing warmly in time with your heartbeat.  

He squeezes and rubs across your soft skin, fingers plucking at your stiff peaks until you moan brokenly. 

“Dad,” your breathy exaltation has him pinching and twisting your nipples before groping your breasts roughly in his hands. 

“‘M almost done,” he licks the shell of your ear and your thighs twitch, “you’ve got such nice tits, princess. Don’t want’em to burn.”

You press your hand over your mouth to muffle the whine you let slip. With one last harsh pinch to your nipples, he lets go, scooting back away from you. 

“Should be good to go,” he grins at your dazed look, “don’t keep your mom waiting.”

Shaking your head, you blink rapidly and slowly climb to your feet. As you pass by Leon, his hand reaches up and smacks your ass hard. 

“Be a good girl, okay?”

“Y-yeah, dad.”

You pad out to the ocean, waving to your mom as she looks for seashells in the shallow water. Wading out far enough for water to hit your chest, you finally let yourself sigh out loud. 

“What in the fuck?!”

You rub wet hands over your face as you gaze out onto the horizon. Flirting is one thing, but getting felt up by your dad is definitely crossing the line. You shiver, clit still throbbing as you reach down to press your palm against your cunt. Even as messed up as it may make you, you wish he would’ve slipped his hand down and fingered your pussy. 

The sun glaring off the water makes you squint even as you enjoy the scenery, trying your best to squish all the other thoughts and feelings you’ve had in the past half hour down into a little box you can open later. It works for a time, until the squinting becomes too much and the glare is driving sharp little needles into your brain. 

Leaving the water, you make your way over to your mom as she scoops up more shells with a net. 

“I’m gonna head in, got a bit of a headache,” you wince as the sun bounces off her watch into your eyes. 

“Let me walk with you,” she frowns, “you’re looking a little washed out.”

You nod and follow her back up to the beach blanket, eyes skirting over where your dad’s lounging reading a book. 

“We’re headed up to the house, do you need anything?”

Your mom grabs her bag and your stuff as your dad sets his book down onto his lap. He looks at you then back to his wife. 

“No, once I finish this, I’ll be heading up, too.”

She hums and takes you by the arm, helping guide you back to the house since the pain beats a tempo behind your eyes and makes your vision a little blurry. Once in the house, she helps you upstairs to your room. In doing so, she makes sure to stop in at the bathroom on the bottom floor to point out the migraine medicine in the cabinet.

Entering your room, she sits you down on your bed. She tucks you in and makes sure to close the blinds before walking back into the hallway. Turning, she gives you a concerned look.

“I’m going to head into town. It’s about an hour's drive from here so I won’t be back til later. If you need anything, call, okay?”

You hum in reply already drifting to sleep in hopes you’ll feel better once you crash for a few hours. The nap helps and by the time you come to, your headache is completely gone. Waking up is a chore however; it takes you a minute to realize where you are, eyelids sticking together, gummy with sleep. 

Raising up on your elbows, you reach over to the side table and grab your phone. Eyebrows pinching together, you blink sluggishly until you can read the time. It’s only late afternoon even if it feels like you’ve slept through the night. Climbing out of bed, you change before leaving your room with a plan on grabbing some water from the kitchen. 

It’s noticeably quiet as you finally step out on the bottom floor. Your mom must still be gone since you don’t see her shoes by the front door. 

“Fuck.”

You hear the muttered curse from the half open bathroom door that you’re walking past heading to the kitchen. 

“Everything okay?” 

You slowly press the door all the way open and your dad fumbles with a towel before placing it over his lap as he sits heavily down on the edge of the tub. 

“I thought you were out with your mother,” he bites out, tone sharp.

“No,” you frown, leaning against the doorjamb, “I had a headache and took a nap. Are you alright?”

He blows out a breath and scrubs a hand over his face. 

“I’m fine. What time did she say she’d be back?”

You shrug, “Couple of hours I think. I don’t really remember.”

“Goddamn it.”

“Should I call—“

“No,” Leon nearly shouts, “no, don’t. It’s not a big deal.”

“Dad, I can help I just need to know what’s wrong,” you step closer into the bathroom. 

He laughs without any humor, “Sure.”

You go to ask him why when your eyes catch on the bottle sitting by the sink. It’s similar to the migraine medicine you saw in the medicine cabinet earlier, the one your mom pointed out if the nap didn’t get rid of your headache. Who knew your dad needed help getting it up?

“Did you..?”

You trail off, feeling awkward and nervous and disgustingly turned on to think your dad’s dick is hard underneath that flimsy towel. 

“Yes,” he sounds tired, “I thought it was the other medicine.”

“Ohh,” you bite your lip, brain completely in the gutter as your eyes drift down to his lap, “I mean, I can still help.”

It seems insane but your dad’s not stopping you as you shuffle closer to stand between his legs. His blue eyes stay steady on yours as you kneel in the floor, knees digging into the soft rug in front of the tub. Leon tugs his briefs down and his cock slaps against his stomach, precum drooling from the head. He’s so hard, the foreskin has drawn back from the tip showcasing how red and swollen his cock has gotten from the medication. 

“Oh my god,” you breathe out, eyes greedily taking him in.

“Fuck, don’t look at it like that,” he groans, hands gripping the tub so tight his knuckles blanch.

“You’re just really big,” you press the dough of your thighs together, trying to put a little pressure on your throbbing clit, “you’ve got the fattest cock I’ve ever seen, dad.”

You watch as precum blurts from the tip to drip all down his length while he moans low in his throat. 

“Christ, you’ve got a filthy mouth,” his pupils are blown as he gazes down at you, “since you like how big my dick is, sweetheart, why don’t you show me, hmm?”

Your tongue licks up all the precum leaking down his dick before softly suckling on the head.

“Oh fuck, that’s it,” he grunts, “suck that cock.”

Moaning, you bob your head down, tongue tracing the thick vein you can feel on the side as you sink down inch by inch. Your dad pulls out to trace your lips with his drippy tip, smearing precum across your mouth like sticky gloss. You moan and press a kiss to his dick, tongue lapping at the crown until he’s rocking back into your mouth. Humming low in your throat makes his cock kick in your mouth, precum coating your tongue.

“Damn, so good,” he groans, hand smoothing across your jaw, cradling it as he pulls his cock out, “never get head from your mom anymore. Feels so good.”

More slick wets your panties as you mewl, throat clicking as you swallow around his thick length. You hungrily suck his cock, tongue circling his head before dipping into the slit to taste more of his precum.

“Like sucking me off, sweetheart?” he tosses the fringe away from his eyes while he rocks his hips, pushing himself deeper into your throat with smooth strokes until you gag heavily. 

“Love that, choke on it a bit more and I’ll be spilling down your slutty throat.”

Thick strands of saliva bridge between your mouth and his dick like shimmery spiderwebs as he slips out. You moan when he ruts his cock across your tongue. Leon groans and reaches down to tap his cock against your lips before feeding it back to you. Whining, you suck him deeper into your mouth, licking across the head before messily bobbing your head further down his thick length.  

“I'm about t’cum, swallow it all up, princess,” he thrusts a few more times before pulling out until the tip is sitting fat and heavy on your tongue. 

Leon grunts and moans as hot thick spurts of cum fill your mouth. Swallowing quickly, you try to keep his cum from spilling out around your lips, but it ends up leaving a sticky mess to drip down your chin in thick strands. 

You watch as he groans, stomach flexing while you suckle on the head of his dick, making sure to not miss any of his hot jizz as his balls empty into your mouth. After giving the tip of his dick a kiss, you pull back and wipe the spend from your face with the bottom of your shirt. 

Your cunt feels soaked, panties sticking to your pussy lips as you shakily stand onto your feet.

“Where do you think you’re going?” 

Your dad stands up beside you, cock still hard and leaking, making you whimper. Pulling his briefs back up, he leaves his shorts and shirt lying on the floor. He grabs you by the forearm and leads you out of the bathroom and all the way upstairs into your room.

“No surprises if your mom comes home early,” he informs you, pushing you further into your room followed by closing and locking your door. 

Heat radiates from your cunt, more slick dripping into the already soaked gusset of your panties. Leon shoves you back onto your bed before climbing on top of you, kissing you heatedly as he sinks down onto your body. You wrap your legs around his waist while you run your hands through his messy hair. You're so turned on you can’t think straight anymore. 

“Thatta girl,” he coos, pulling back to drop kisses across your neck, “can’t wait to feel your wet little pussy, baby.”

You whimper and pull him back up into another kiss. This time he licks into your mouth messily, spit dripping from the corners of your lips to slide down your jaw. You feel him grind his cock against you before pulling away. 

He sits back on his haunches and slips his briefs off, maneuvering until he can toss them into the floor. Next, he leans forward and grips the bands of your panties and shorts. You help him, shimmying to move your clothes down off of your legs. As he moves those into the floor, you slip your shirt off and let it too fall onto the pile of clothing. 

“God, love your tits,” he groans, shoving his face into your breasts, mouth licking and biting every inch of skin they come across. 

His mouth suctions around a nipple, tongue teasing the stiff bud as he tweaks the opposite one with his fingers. 

“Dad,” you moan, nails digging into his scalp.

“What?” He coos, “your dad can’t show his appreciation?”

A whine rasps from your throat and Leon laughs meanly before biting the swollen bud he was sucking. With a grunt, he moves across your sternum, leaving hot open mouthed kisses across your chest until he can suckle and tease the other nipple, fingers plucking and pinching at the now wet one. 

Your hips writhe, leaking cunt dragging against his stomach as his cock grinds against the cleft of your ass. 

“Gonna let daddy stuff your tight wet cunt?” He chuckles as your eyes flutter as he lathes your nipples with broad swipes of his tongue. 

“Yes,” you whisper, “wanna feel you split me open. You’re so big.”

Whining on the last word, you rock down, feeling his tip catch against your pussy lips and driving you crazy. 

He growls and sits back on his heels, taking his cock in hand to smack it against your clit. 

“So slutty,” his pupils swallow the blue of his eyes, “want daddy to stretch this little hole out? Show you how a real dick feels?”

Nodding along with his words, you suck your bottom lip into your mouth, teeth sinking into the plush skin.  

“Goddamn,” he mutters, spitting in his hand to slick his cock before pressing the head against your soaked heat. 

Using his thumb, he presses his cock down so the tip slides into your hole. Keeping it there, he rocks against your hips, sinking inch by inch into your pulsing cunt as his thumb keeps his cock steady. Pulling halfway out, he flexes his hips and thrusts forward faster than before. 

“Even your mom doesn’t let me go raw anymore,” he chuckles, bottoming out so fast you choke on air, “so this is a real treat, sweetheart.”

“Ohh god, dad,” you moan, voice high as he starts sliding his cock in and out of your pussy, rough thrusts that make your breasts bounce. 

You whine when he grinds against you, his pelvis rubbing over your swollen clit just right. His balls smack against your ass on every thrust, the loud plap plap plap of skin driving your arousal even higher. 

“Dad, fuck, s’too much,” you gasp out another whine, head feeling dizzy as your blood rushes, arousal making your pulse feel heavy in your throat. 

He groans and drops his weight down on you, bare skin sticking together from the sweat building between your bodies. Leon kisses across your neck, mouth grazing your skin with barely there nips that makes your pussy flutter around his cock. 

The thatch of hair at the base of Leon’s cock grazes your sensitive clit, sending little electric shocks of pleasure that brings tears to your eyes. You feel so good, you can’t stop the slutty noises from leaving your mouth. Rutting into your body, your dad’s fat cock grinds against the spongy spot along the front of your cunt. Slick gushes from your pussy as he hammers your g-spot so perfectly you can’t help but squeeze him tighter and tighter. 

“Princess,” he murmurs in your ear, “is this little pussy gonna cum? You’re so soft and wet— I can feel you tightening up around me. God so much tighter than your mom, can’t believe I’ve been missing out.”

His words push you over the edge. You babble out little chants of dad, dad, dad until a guttural moan spills from your throat, thighs jumping as your pussy clamps down on Leon’s dick like a vice.

Your low moaning twists into a scream as his hand sneaks down to rub and tease your clit. Instead of your orgasm tapering off, it ramps up, gaining speed until it hurtles you into cumming again. 

“Aww, she’s gripping me so tight,” Leon mocks sweetly in your ear, “yeah, that’s it, sweetheart.”

“Dad,” you whimper, tears clumping your eyelashes, “dad, please.”

A moan rumbles from his chest and he humps your cunt faster, cock never pulling completely out as he ruts inside your slick pussy walls. Half a dozen thrusts more and he’s growling down at you, pressing his cock balls deep into your cunt, thick cum spurting from the tip of his dick to stuff you full.  

“Oh so tight, baby,” he sighs, hips pressed against yours as he spills inside your snug little cunt, “your little pussy fits me like a glove.”

Shuddering, your walls milk another small load of cum from his heavy balls and he pants noisily against your clavicle. He presses up onto his forearms, hips swiveling to pull his cock halfway out before sinking it back inside, a mix of your creamy arousal and his spend making a ring around the base.

“Good, huh,” his laugh tinges on mocking, “don’t worry, ‘m not done with my daughter’s cute pussy, gonna keep you here for as long as it takes.”

After that, it’s all a pleasurable blur. You're unsure how many orgasms your dad has given you at this point, but you know he’s only had three and his cock is still so thick and hard. 

“Think this one will be it, princess,” he grunts, hoisting your limp thighs up, the bend of your knees slotting perfectly over the bend of his arms. 

You can only pant in reply, mouth as dry as cotton. He notches the head of his drooling dick at your entrance, dragging the tip up to smear the cum from his last creampie all over your used cunt. 

“One last load for your greedy little pussy,” he grins down at you, “then we can take a shower.”

He sinks his cock into your sore pussy at the same time he leans forward, pressing your sweaty bodies together. Your eyes roll back as the tip of his cock kisses your cervix, thighs shaking against his arms. 

“So deep,” he groans, “best cunt I’ve ever fucked and to think it belongs to my sweet daughter.”

Your pussy spasms and clenches down on his thick length as you cry out. Brain melting pleasure seeps down your spine as he pulls out to grind across your g-spot before fucking back into your cunt roughly. 

“S’good, dad,” you mewl, mouth drooling as he hammers his cock into your sensitive hole, “so good.”

“I know,” he croons, “I feel good, too. Not g’nna be able to give up this sweet little pussy. She grips me too good, baby, I’m gonna want her all the time.”

Another orgasm slams into your body, pussy pulsing and sucking his cock into your hole as your head thrashes against the bed. Leon’s hands grip your wrists to push them down against the bed so you don’t scratch him. 

“Fuck, milking your dad’s cock like you’re made for it,” he groans, humping into your pussy with deep strokes until you’re crying from overstimulation. 

“Shh, shh, just take it a little more, ‘m about to cum,” he licks into your mouth, biting on your bottom lip before pulling back, “that’s it, take it, take your dad’s dick deep into that hot, greedy little pussy.”  

Hiccuping a sob, your cunt steadily milks his cock as he buries himself all the way, as deep into your pussy as possible. He grunts against your skin as he grinds his dick against your cervix, spilling rope after rope of cum to paint your walls white. The sticky heat makes your clit throb even as your body aches, wanting to succumb to exhaustion. 

The distant question of how your mom isn’t back yet buzzes at the corner of your consciousness. You must slur it out loud cause Leon laughs as he pulls his softening cock from your puffy leaking cunt. 

“She texted you to say she got stuck in a traffic jam and the road’s blocked for a few hours,” he sighs as he slaps his cock down onto your messy pussy, a wet splat that makes you wince. 

“Dad, ‘m sore,” you pout.

“So sorry, baby,” he coos, a grin overtaking his face, “want me to kiss it and make it better?”

Chest fluttering at the thought, you go to agree when your phone buzzes with an incoming call. Leon grabs it to silence it but turns to look at you. 

“It’s your mom,” he chuckles, handing it over to you, “better see what she wants.”

Sliding it open, her voice rings out clear in the quiet of your room. 

“Hey honey, your dad didn’t answer but I wanted to say I’m about five minutes from the house if you wanted to preheat the oven for this frozen pizza I picked up,” she laughs to herself, “well, it was frozen.”

Your dad sits down on the edge of the bed, listening in to the conversation. 

“Okay, sure, we’ll see ya when you get here,” Leon nods at you, “bye, mom.”

After she says goodbye, you put the phone back on the side table. 

“Well we should get cleaned up,” Leon helps you stand on weak legs, “I’ll help you to the tub and I’ll head downstairs.”

“Thanks, dad,” you smile up at him and he drops a kiss on your cheek. 

“Of course,” he leads you out into the hallway, helping you inside the little bathroom next to your room. 

He sits you down onto the toilet, turning on the shower to allow it time to heat up. 

“Thanks,” he murmurs, pressing a soft kiss on your temple, “I know it’s all kinds of fucked up, but I still love you.”

Heart beating double time, you give him a crooked smile, “I love you too, dad.”

He presses his lips together, looking like he wants to say more, but he blows out a harsh breath and walks back out into the hall. 

“I’ll handle the oven and your mom, you just come downstairs when you’re ready.”

“I will,” you say as he swings the door shut. 

Sitting there with your thoughts, you let yourself feel. Satisfaction filters through followed by a smidgen of guilt and shame. You hate that your mom is an innocent party in all of this, but you don’t regret letting your dad fuck your brains out. And since this is a complete one off, it’s just a little family secret that you’ll both be taking to the grave. 

Once steam wafts from the shower, you stand up and step into the warm water. You whimper as the heat works on your sore muscles. By this time tomorrow, this will all seem like some really deranged fantasy you dreamt up. Finishing up in the shower, you dry off and make your way back to your room. Getting dressed, you descend downstairs, the smell of pizza growing stronger. 

“Oh there you are! Feeling better?” 

Your mom comes around the counter to feel your forehead. 

“Yeah, I just slept it off.”

She ushers you to sit down at the table and brings the pizza over, your dad following behind with the drinks. Your mom sits to your right and your dad sits across from you both. He catches your eye and winks, making you look down at your plate out of shyness. 

“Eat up, I’m sure you’re wore out from the hard day,” his mirthful tone draws your gaze back up. 

“Yeah,” you clear your throat and take a drink, “it’s been a hard day alright.”

[zilabee]

Just stumbled on this brilliant post over on Meet The Beatles For Real. It's a german article in Bravo Magazine interviewing the women that worked at Apple. The wonderful keeper of mtbfr then typed the whole lot out and google translated it into english - all love to her for the wonderful work she does on that site.

I've not copied all of it over here, just my favourite bits... but that is most of the bits.

Janet Lumley - Kitchen maid (16) I have been cooking for the Beatles for half a year.   It is fantastic.   I cook just as carefully for the four of them as I do for my own family. John is the pickiest, he is vegetarian. Paul is the hungriest and has even brought his plate back to tell us how good it tasted to him.

Sally Burgess - Press Secretary (21) John, Paul, George and Ringo only have young, funny and talented people around and it flatters me to be a part of it. Although we work hard, the atmosphere is casual and fun, better than any other company in the world. And every day something new happens.  You must learn to quickly adapt to any situation. Once however, it even became too much for me and I just crawled under my desk.

Debbie Wellum - Receptionist (20) I have decided that I have the most exciting Apple job. I have to catch all the teenagers who want to speak to my bosses.  Recently, a group of Italian scouts were here, all of whom claimed to be cousins ​​of George Harrison.  But I didn’t fall for such a dirty trick.  I wouldn’t trade in my bosses for anyone else in the world, even if they had really had so many cousins!

Sally Reed - Secretary (20) I've been a Beatle fan before I started here eight months ago. The four are no longer for me, but I've learned to respect them as businessmen and superiors. I work in the production department; the Beatles are always nice and easy going, even if everything else is wobbling around them. They have a professional attitude which is a very different attitude to these things than a normal human; sometimes I wish I could have some of that.

Dee Meehan - Assistant (25) I have to listen to all the tapes that are sent to the Beatles from people who want to make a career out of music.   A tough job, but whoever has worked in the pop industry, knows what is going on, especially if you have the Beatles as bosses. Paul is the best; he always knows exactly what he wants. George and Ringo are always nice and polite, but sometimes John gets on my nerves. But he has improved a lot recently.

Amanda Hull - Tea cook (39) I am responsible  for tea and coffee, which  is used a lot with us, because Apple is a hospitable house. In a little chamber, I have a two burner stove, on which is always a pot of water and a pot of coffee standing. The tea is always fresh, otherwise it will be bitter. With Paul, I make sure that he does not get too much sugar. This is not good for his future children.

Linda Bristow - Assistant Publisher (22) I work for Apple music publishing. Of course I'm a Beatles fan, but I do not fall into a swoon every time they come through the door. Just to be a fan is not enough for a job at Apple. There is plenty to do and you have to know something too. But as for us, we are paid well and have the best bosses in the world. My favourite boss is George. He is for me the most beautiful thing. But I cannot tell him - because he would be pissed.

Carol Padden - Press Secretary (23) Of course, I'm a Beatles fan. Who isn’t? It's easy to work for such pleasant, young handsome men instead of old thick, bad-tempered men who are constantly, trying to flirt with you. Such a thing does not exist in the Beatles.   I have never heard any girls complain that one of the Beatles had flirted with her!

Barbara Bennet - Secretary (24) My best experience with Apple was when Paul gave me a little Yorkshire terrier.  He had heard me gushing to a colleague about this breed, and a few days later he had one in tow. But once when I visited my friend Colin Peterson the terrier ran into the city by himself.  I never saw him again, although I'd put up a lot of ads.

[basedkikuenjoyer]

Jojolands 13: Ohana Means I'll Set Your Ass on Fire

Dragona dropping some great truth about the absurd in this bizarre adventure. We finally got a peak behind that mask. I love it and I hate it, if you've read the chapter already you know what I mean. We'll get to that, because this right here isn't spoilery and it was such a cool nugget.

I love the way Dragona talks about the "absurd." Chance moments that alter one's life for better or for worse. The things that just don't make sense. Especially paired with Dragona opining about nearly losing their heart in the same chapter that last part about hearts being destroyed hits hard. I'm definitely sure we're looking at a trans narrative here and one we'll see play out. The chapter does a good job of implying what we need to know. Nudges at an early theory you've been changing your body with Smooth Operator. We ready? What follows is no place for beginners or sensitive hearts:

Oh HELL yes! As if I needed a reason, these two were well on their way to top Jojo status and now the dynamic duo of the Joestar Siblings are definitely there. Mean girl sets her sights on a much more timid Dragona who we now know looked way more masculine at 14 than 18. Talking physical build and not just fashion. You know, I don't expect an 18yo to have all that figured out and with this I do think we'll see her keep coming into her own. But holy shit that was fucked up and I sincerely hope we can get through the rest of this with no more sexual assault on my Jojos blorbo.

If they do...Jodio will fuck you up. Set a whole damn bus on fire! And while I'm not looking forward to having to relive the impetus in the inevitable anime adaptation, since we've already had the cop I kinda like the perpetrator being a girl here. For one because it shows a side of this kind of bigotry that often goes underrepresented. You see a little more space made typically for trans men who had bad experiences with men prior to coming out, largely because it tends to overlap with those who found a comfortable half-step in something like a radical feminist group. But this sets up Dragona pretty well for a realistic other side of the coin to that. Your experiences with bullying might make you a little skittish of girls your age, you keep a foot in this criminal world even if we keep showing you (not unlike Okiku) as someone who doesn't fit super well, all this would certainly explain why you'd gravitate towards a figure like Meryl Mei. Why there's great potential for drama if she shows a nastier side. It's all great for a trans story that justifies still figuring yourself out through it...but sticks to a fairly realistic path for a lot of young women who find themselves running with gangs.

All that said, Jodio you absolute freak. Burning the whole bus is metal, it's scruffy, he's protecting family. Doooooope. These two are fantastic and I can't wait to explore their story, their dynamic more. Jodio & Dragona's sibling bond is the beating heart of this part. As much as I love Kiku/Izo & Killua/Alluka yeah this is gonna be a banger. Speaking of, this chapter was also the second time we nudged at Jodio getting shit for looking fey too. These two are ride or die for each other and their awesome mom Barbara Ann. How this all ties into their family falling apart and their desire to become filthy rich? No need to ask...

In lighter news. They. When Meryl learns of the other lava rock that got smashed. We're all clear on who's the brains and who's the firepower in the dynamic duo right? I trust Meryl as far as I can throw her and she's a big lady. But for now everything seems on the up-and-up. Charmingman seems to have passed the sniff test and yeah it looks like he's just going to hang around. I like this new setup. Scouting a shadowy company to see if we can get more lava rock.

All in all one of the best chapters of Jojolands so far. I'm loving it, this is the exact direction I hoped it'd go. The backstory made this pretty heavy and I hope we can have more fun with this gang on the new excursion.

[evil-robot-husband]

Resonance by @charlieslowartsies...

‘Do you understand, young heir? A Prime is not a scout, not a medic. Their ferocity in battle is unmatched. They stop only when the opposing spark is snuffed out.’  “But Optimus isn’t like that—” Cade choked out, his breath leaving his chest as he watched the battle turn horribly one sided. Yes, apparently, Optimus could be and currently was just like that. And it was horrifying.  This wasn’t a fight, not anymore. It was target practice.  ‘A Prime never loses.’ remarked Excalibur coolly. 

Bound in full-cloth with acrylic paint details and acrylic edges. Typeset and binding done by hand, by me.

What to even say about this fic? Number one, it's fucking amazing. Number two, if you haven't read it, you need to read it now.

I read this and immediately thought "I need to hold this in my hands," so I made that happen! It took me less than a week (thanks, ADHD hyperfocus!) and every bit of it was fun.

Charlie did a fantastic job capturing Cade and Optimus' characters, to the point where I've basically accepted their work as my new canon and can't hear anything that Bay has to say because I'm too busy cheering on Cade as he sleeps on Optimus' giant metal chest.

What was I saying?

Right. Not only is the characterization amazing, the plot is absolutely captivating. It's fun! It's exciting! Every chapter has something that made me squee!

Yeah, so, read Resonance by CharlieMcarthy. You will thank me later.

[madlyn5ever]

Okay but theoretically if HSMTMTS season 4 is set around fall 2020 then does that mean that Ashlyn and Maddox are now college/ out of HS gfs?

Like Imagine Maddox is still working as a P.A. For Quinn and Ashlyn is studying acting at whatever the big Salt Lake college is and they have a dog and EJ is now working as a T.A. for Miss Jenn or another teacher at East High and Emmy’s in senior year now so she’s still doing musicals with Miss Jenn.

Ricky and Gina are obviously headliners for Quinn’s projects because after Mack left who else was gonna play Romeo? But Quinn likes their chemistry. Ricky still claims to have never seen a musical despite now having been in three.

And seb and Carlos are now making long distance work, off and on, because Carlos got sort of Scouted for his choreo skills and went from helping smaller theatre companies with their choreo to working with Broadway shows, so sometimes when Carlos is really busy with a project Seb will travel back to salt lake to help with his families farm and visit.

(I didn’t give Seb a Job because I can’t think of what he’d do. He’s just too like “sweet boy oblivious” and I don’t know what to do with him. But he has a good time for sure.)

Kourtney and Jet are planning to move in together after Kourtney graduates from Louis (Lewis?), but until then they do weekend visits when they can, sometimes to Lewis , sometimes to salt lake, and Jet perpetually follows Maddox and Ashlyn around bc he doesn’t know what to do with himself without Kourtney. They pretend to be annoyed but they secretly find it hilarious and endearing.

Big Red and Antoine got together officially after Big Red gets him to admit he’s not French to the rest of the Drama Dept. and that he’s sorry for causing trouble. Big red and Carlos also become friends again in the same way they were before after Seb and Carlos get back together, and it has a lot to do with how fond he actually is of Big Red bc he knows he’s not a bad guy. (I need this to be more than a HC because I still cannot believe they ruined his and sebs characters like that for the drama.)

During the Summers Maddox works at Shallow Lake as a full fledged counselor alongside Dewey wood because she just loves camp so much and she’s still Dewey’s favorite camper. Val helps when she can but she’s got a full job as a psychologist and doesn’t have the same flexibility as Maddox does with Quinn. EJ is a counselor too bc he gets time off in the summers being a teachers assistant and all. He spends his summers following Maddox around when he gets free time and missing Val when she’s not there. Maddox gets having feelings for Val but if she hears “Val used to call me EJ” one more time-

EJ and Val are still going strong and EJ is making plans to propose to her once his teaching Job is finally sorted out and he isn’t just a trainee anymore. (This is just cause EJ needs a win.)

(Also, when Maddox is away at camp, Jet and Ashlyn hang out. They usually do movie nights which consist of Ashlyn sharing her favorites, and Jet sharing his. Jet really likes Spider-Man, Night At The Museum, and Fantastic Mr. Fox. Ashlyn likes Grease, anything with Bette Midler in it, and the Spiderwick movies.) (they also watch baking shows together and yell at the screen when the contestants mess up their bakes when times running out)

Miss Jenn and Mr.Mazzara are the IT teacher couple at East High. This goes on for a about a year before Principle Gutierrez says that they either need to be married or someone has to quit bc it’s not in accordance with the schools policy. They have a small gathering that ends with Karaoke at the bowling alley. All of the Drama kids attend, and they finally meet Miss Jenns mother from all of her increasingly concerning stories.

Ricky’s mom and dad get back together, and they squash the divorce stuff. They are now happier than ever. (Ricky also might need a win idk)

Nini has a thriving music career. She’s just as successful as Olivia is irl.

Oh! And Natalie Bagley is ruling the world or something. That feels like something she would do. Maybe she’s president.

[presidentbungus]

Medic doesn’t necessarily recognize the face, but he knows the silhouette—the same one that always tends to show up behind the infernal contraptions that tear his teammates to shreds. He’s stocky, hunched, an odd-looking shotgun with a vertical barrel held carefully pointed away from his chest.

When he sees Medic, he smiles, and even though only a good half of his face is visible for dark tinted goggles and a slightly overlarge bright yellow hard hat, what’s visible betrays a powerful jawline, symmetrical features, disturbingly white teeth.

Medic must be getting lonely—his hormones seem to be operating on overdrive. He has to remind himself there is a shotgun pointed at his chest, and that the shotgun is getting closer every few seconds.

“Howdy, partner,” the other team’s Engineer calls, in a thick, relatively unsurprising accent he’s fairly sure is southern-American. Medic watches him carefully, choosing not to respond, so he follows: “I ain’t lookin’ for trouble or nothing.”

What a fascinating and entirely incomprehensible pattern of speech. Medic continues to push the cart, ignoring him, since he doesn't look like the sort to bury a significant amount of shrapnel in his back for lack of attention—though if he did at this point it would be more of a blessing than anything.

“Where’s the rest of y’all’s team?”

“I don’t know,” he calls back, more bitterly than necessary or intended. “Why would they tell me? I really don’t know.”

“Interesting.” He’s walked up close enough that his voice lowers into something deeper, more comfortable-sounding. “Now, uh, my team’s gone too… which is why I was asking.”

“Maybe they all ran off to let the only two useful members of either team handle everything.”

“Well, uh,” the engineer seems to get the implication because he blushes a little bit, “to be fair if I’m supposed to be handling things I think I’m doin’ a pretty bang-up job.”

Hmm. “Is that supposed to mean ‘bad’?”

“Well, what’s implied by the context clues?”

The engineer keeps leaning against a wall, falling behind, and scrambling ahead to lean against another wall. Medic watches him with barely-concealed amusement.

“That you’re standing by and doing nothing while the enemy team captures.”

“Yeah. That’s the point.”

“If it helps, Engineer, from my perspective you’re doing some fantastic work."

"You know, I'll take it."

————

Engineer smiles, and his eyes crinkle even through the goggles, and he sets an experimental hand on the cart.

It grinds to a halt. Medic almost loses his balance since the thing he was pushing suddenly stops moving, though he wrenches his back and narrowly avoids toppling over the thick soles of his boots (though at the cost of whatever makes an extremely disturbing popping noise in his back).

“It’s like the wheels just lock up,” Engineer says. He has a way of making everything he says sound both endlessly fascinated and completely apathetic, like he already knew what was going on. “Well, what’s the point of that?”

“If you could remove your hand from the cart,” Medic says. “I’m trying not to imply to my team—wherever they are—that something may be amiss at the objective.”

He complies, stepping back, leaning against a wall. Medic thinks the amount of tint on his goggles is on purpose—a less observant person might think he was looking away, though the tilt of his head implies his eyes are still very much watching Medic pant and strain to keep the cart rolling. And well—what does Scout always say?—screw him. Medic’s just not sure why he feels so embarrassed.

“Are you seeing anything of interest, Herr Engineer?”

“Well, if you gotta know… a little.” Medic feels the half-wink all the way from there, and is annoyed at how warm his face feels. “But I’m not sure if it’s reciprocal.”

Interesting. “Potentially.” And to douse that general sentiment: “You seem incredibly irritating.”

“Give it a few days.”

[daedalusdavinci]

Superbat Fic Recs

every superbat fic ive ever read has been recommended to me, almost, bc the superbat tag scares the absolute piss out of me, so these are like. twice over recommended. i dont believe that theres such a thing as "in character" when it comes to bruce or clark bc theyve been characterized so many different ways, so i tend to rate how good superbat fics are entirely by how delightful they are to read (plot, writing style, fun dynamic, etc). that said here are some of the superbat fics that i find the most delightful

The Long Hangover

by CoffioCake

Clark knows he should take a break: His powers are on the fritz, he feels like shit, and Batman’s treating him like a liability. But Gotham's villains seem to have it in for Metropolis' Big Blue Boy Scout and Clark won't just wait around for answers. Batman might be the world’s greatest detective, but Clark Kent is one of the Daily Planet’s most tenacious reporters. This is definitely a job for Superman.

i love this one. its long but its got so many good beats- good plot, fun dialogue, fantastic levels of identity porn where you are just DYING for them to figure it out. i think a lot of superbat fics tend to prioritize batman and his family and cast too much, but this ones definitely about superman, which is a nice change of pace

Nor The Rain

by Romany (@romanyeva on tumblr)

Bruce decides it's time.

this ones short but its cute and so sweet. its been a while since i read it, but i remember loving the writing

Rescue and Recover

by OdosBucket

The bats have spent the better part of the past two months in captivity, and Clark is grateful to finally have them back, even if it will still be some time before any of them are recovered from the experience.

this one drove me CRAZY the first time i read it. i was so obsessed w the absolutely married dynamic bruce and clark have in this, and its good if you really like batfam whump

certain obscure things

by @liodain

Bruce seeks to mend in the wake of Superman's death. Fortunately, Superman doesn't believe in staying dead. Unfortunately, Bruce isn't certain how to deal with this—especially with how easily Clark slots into his life. All he knows is that an encounter with the Enchantress is definitely not the way to go.

im not a synderverse fan but it remains that some of the best and most fun superbat fics to read are synderverse. love what the girlies are doing with those old men. this one is really fun, particularly in how it handles bruces grief and what its like to grieve someone who isnt gone

fame is the bait (and the switch is your desolate smile)

by nowrunalong (@buffyfemslash on tumblr)

"Superman,” Wayne says emphatically. "Now there’s an interesting guy. The concept of wealth probably doesn’t even register to an alien who could throw a whole skyscraper into the sea if he was in a snit.” It’s almost hilariously ironic that Wayne is saying this here, in Clark’s place of employment, where Clark works ten-hour shifts to earn enough tip money to pay rent on a one-bedroom apartment. “He’s gotta live somewhere,” Clark points out. Or: Clark meets Bruce, and then Superman meets Bruce Wayne. Neither is entirely fooled.

speaking of synderverse. this ones also a lot of fun! its a lot of bruce being antagonistic in the beginning and clark being a total golden retriever, which is pretty on beat for the enemies to lovers type dynamic that i always see in synderverse fics.

I'm Not As Think As You Drunk I Am

by Mardiaz173

It was like living in the Twilight Zone. Everyone else believed fervently in Bruce Wayne’s reputation. He was a flirty, stupid, and entitled drunk whose only redeeming quality was his bleeding heart. And yet every time Clark spoke with Wayne, the man was clever, mischievous, and sober with an indecipherable ulterior motive. And no one believed Clark. Not Lois, not his parents, not even Batman.

bruce is such a ridiculous ass in this and its kind of hilarious. identity porn galore. its a fun read!

Send to All

by kerosceene

I, ___________________________, hereby acknowledge that this form represents my wishes should I contract phytoaphrodisiac-induced delirium (hereafter referred to as “PAID”) during engagements with or while apprehending Dr. Pamela Lillian Isley (“Poison Ivy”). - the bats have a sex pollen release form. because of course they do.

this ones really more batfamily and i just. listen. i think this is the funniest fic ever written, maybe. it makes me sob every single time. im not going to say anything else but you should just read it and trust me

[m-jelly]

Jelly! I hope you're having a fantastic day!! I was wondering if I could request a fic where Y/N and Erwin worked closely during the time Levi was forced to join the corps. Maybe some enemies to lovers where Erwin asks Y/N to keep an eye on Levi, but they can't stand each other. After getting to know each other though, they start to develop feelings and respect for each other. You can decide how that happens! No pressure if you don't want to!

Hope you're having a wonderful day too, anon <3

@kenkopanda-art <3

More in common than you think

Pairing: Levi x Reader

Genre and tags: Canon world, during choice with no regrets, enemies to lovers, fluff, cute, flustered Levi, romance.

Concept: Levi is pulled into the scouts and while everyone is impressed, you are not. You think Levi is a criminal and will have no respect for authority and Levi thinks you're a stuck-up military soldier who only knows how to take commands. Erwin asks you to keep an eye on Levi because Erwin trusts you the most being his military spy. You watch over Levi and you both butt heads at first, but you slowly get to know each other and Levi finds comfort in your arms when things go wrong.

You folded your arms as you watched people making a fuss over Levi and his friends after they demonstrated their abilities with the gear and blades. They had great skills, but that didn't make up for the poor attitude they had. You didn't like any of the three, especially Levi.

You huffed and walked away from the crowd. You kept moving until you noticed Erwin watching from a distance with paperwork in hand. You approached him with curiosity. "Sir?"

Erwin glanced down at you and softly said your name with a kind look in his eyes. "Just the person I needed to see."

"What do you need me to do?"

He glanced over at Levi and his friends. "I need you to keep an eye on Levi."

You made a rumbling noise in your chest as you felt irritated. "Why?"

"I trust you more than anyone." He placed his hand on your shoulder. "You've seen, heard and done things for me that no one would dream of. You hold many secrets. Please."

You sighed. "Fine. I'll do it."

"I appreciate it."

You let out a long sigh and followed Levi around for a few days. You kept a close eye on him and made sure he didn't see you much. You started to get a bit bored with sneaking around, so you decided to let him see you as you followed. You could see Levi was getting irritated by you being around him so much, which made you happy that you were pissing him off.

Levi turned to you as you sat on the wall with an apple and a knife. He watched you cut a slice. "Tch, what's your fucking problem?"

You ate the slice and smiled at him. "Hello to you too."

He walked right up to you. "Back off."

You licked your lips. "Nah."

He shoved you a little. "I don't need a babysitter!"

"I'm just doing what I was told to do. If I had any say, I would have nothing to do with a common criminal."

He snarled at you. "I don't want anything to do with some yes man. You are always up the military asses."

You jumped off the wall. "You have no fucking clue what I do."

"And you don't know shit about me."

You narrowed your eyes. "I know you're a criminal."

"You have to do what you can to survive the underground city."

You hugged yourself. "You have no idea the things I've done to keep this city safe."

Levi stared at you and saw the dark look in your eyes. "You're the spy."

You looked over at Levi. "So what if I am?"

He sighed. "You've probably killed people."

You leaned against the wall. "I'm not here to try and make friends with you. I'm watching you and that's my job right now. I'll do my job."

"Tch."

You watched over Levi a little longer, but you also had other jobs to do. You were exhausted and spread too thin. You skipped a day keeping an eye on Levi and just sat on the roof with a cup of tea. You knew you needed a holiday, you needed a break or you needed to tell Erwin enough with the jobs.

"Oi?"

You looked over at Levi. "Not in the mood."

He walked over to you. "Tch, not here to fight." He sat down next to you. "Haven't seen you following me much."

"Because I've been doing other jobs and today I'm throwing a little tantrum and not doing anything."

"Do you get overworked?"

You huffed a little and didn't know if you should interact with Levi, seeing as you two butted heads often, but you needed to vent and he was offering. You let the floodgates open and you gushed to Levi about the things you'd done and seen. You told him everything and didn't hold back. Once you were finished Levi told you about his time growing up in the underground city and what he went through.

You ruffled your hair. "Hey, I'm sorry for being an asshole to you. I didn't understand what you went through."

"I'm sorry too." He frowned. "Erwin expects a lot from you. Is he like that with everyone?"

You shook your head. "Only those he knows can take it."

He frowned in thought. "That's not fair."

"As soon as you face your first titan and show what you can do to Erwin, he'll be the same with you. You're strong."

Levi smiled. "You're stronger."

You laughed. "So you can smile."

"I have my moments."

You winked at him. "That you do." You looked over the edge of the building to see his friends looking for him. "You should head down. Your friends want you."

He hummed. "So, do you like tea?"

You looked over at Levi. "Yeah, why?"

He blushed a little. "We should have a cup to talk about the shit we've been through."

You nodded. "Sounds good."

He stood up. "See you around, brat."

"See you, thug." You giggled at his light blush. You waved goodbye to him and relaxed. "He's not so bad."

You were on a mission when Levi was going off with the other scouts on his first outing. You managed to run over to him in time to say goodbye. You wished him luck and to give it everything he has and you'd be waiting for him. You set up a nice afternoon tea for him on the roof for when he got back.

You smiled when the roof door opened. "Levi! Welcome back!" You stared at him and saw the darkness in his eyes. "Levi...I'm so sorry."

He walked over to you and dropped to his knees. He hugged your waist and pressed his face against your stomach. "Just for a moment, please."

You played with his hair and sighed. "Sure."

Levi clung to you for a while before releasing you. "Thank you."

You sat down with him. You poured him a cup of tea. "Here."

"Thank you."

You held your cup and hummed. "How was riding beyond the walls for the first time?"

He gave you a tired smile. "Was beautiful."

"Right? It's nice to be out there. I always feel like we're cattle in here."

"So do I."

You looked over at Levi. "You ever dream about what you'd do if you weren't in the scouts?"

He nodded. "A tea shop."

"That's cute."

He blushed hard. "Tch, not cute."

You giggled. "It is! I think you'd do a great job."

He sipped his tea. "Says the woman who makes the best tea ever. I don't even like the tea I make any more, it has to be yours."

You leaned over and kissed his cheek. "You really are sweet, Levi."

He gulped a little. "If I make it, would you like to work with me?"

You nodded. "I'd love to."

He reached over and held your hand. "Thank you for this. Everyone else just...you're perfect."

You kissed the back of his hand. "I've lost enough people to know that when it happens, you don't want to keep talking about it because it just drags up the feelings of loss."

"It does."

"Take your time because I'll always be here."

Levi leaned over and kissed you. He pulled back and blushed a little. "M-Me too."

[outeremissary]

4 & 5 for Dungeon Meshi? (I'm assuming you've been asked PF related questions)

DUNGEON MESHI IN THE INBOX?! This is THRILLING

From this prompt list.

4. what is your favorite CANON ship?

So a funny thing about Dungeon Meshi is that there are uhhh. Zero canon ships I think. Unless you count Chilchuck the middle aged halfling getting left by his wife or any of the several very one-sided crushes scattered among the side characters. I think that there is actually no romance that happens onscreen, the only mentioned romance is in one guy's backstory and was his brother marrying his crush. So I guess I don't have a favorite canon ship??? I'm just going to show you the most divorced halfling in fiction instead.

I think his adult children have also stopped talking to him but it's too late at night for me to fact check that one

5. who is your favorite character (and maybe why?)

Oh it is ALWAYS so hard because there are so many fantastic characters in this series and I'm going to do two anyway because I can't help myself. But seriously there's not a single bad one, everyone is so delightful down to the most minor side characters. but anyway!!!

First of all, Mithrun!

Mithrun is the captain of the squad of elvish scouts sent to the island, and is a relatively late arriving character (the Canaries arriving is a foreshadowed sign of the central conflict escalating to something serious). Mithrun is a terrible, lethal warrior with singular drive who strikes fear into most characters who meet him- he uses taunts so cruel they cause one of the main villains to despair, he's quick to suggest assassination as a solution to problems, and his creative use of teleportation has grisly, torturous effects on foes. He's also severely disabled. Without significant support, he struggles to function in daily life due to an inability to translate his body's needs into actions tending them. His life is managed with a combination of strict routine managing basic tasks and aid from comrades who ensure that he eats, sleeps, and carries out other essential physical behaviors. In social situations he's also blunt and generally opaque in his behavior, usually cutting straight to the point and often excluding others from his reasoning. Despite that, he's someone who has a certain charisma: his comrades consider him an inspirational leader and feel strong affection and loyalty towards him, and he's willing to take risks and extend trust towards others. He also still possesses a certain cunning that makes him very fun to watch. This has all been a lot of exposition to try to explain things, hahh...

Here's his cover by the way. All the covers are composed to be comedic and often aren't based in any real event, but you can see that teleportation at work!

Anyway, I'm fond of Mithrun because I enjoy seeing a character who's very, very ND-coded who's good at a job that isn't "inventor" or "knowledge guy," which I think is a niche that a lot of characters like that tend to fall into. He's badass, he's cool, and even though he's straightforward he's never naive. He's incredibly competent and strategic. He's also got a very dramatic, tragic backstory that's deeply intertwined with the plot and gives him a lot of really fun interactions with major villains- those are also the scenes that tend to draw a lot of high emotion out of him, and I love high emotion and drama! And yet despite the development of his condition being a central point of his tragic backstory, there's still never any lingering on "curing" or "fixing" him, which is... really nice, honestly. He has close, supportive friends and a life he's content with, and in some extra comics suggests that he doesn't like the person he used to be, even if to other people that was the time when he was full of potential. Both the persistence through significant trauma and the rejection of the telling of his life story as a pure tragedy are things I really enjoy.

But yeah another thing I love about Mithrun is that he's canonically just a little nasty and is drawn with these perpetually fucking chapped lips. He's jsut like me fr

Also you are being spared so many Mithrun Images by the late hour but I do happen to have this just at hand on my phone. I know this doesn't mean fucking anything without context but I want to look at this image so now we all have to look at it together. It's so so late

ANYWAY. There's also a SORCERER in Dungeon Meshi! This one. This little cunt. A fun fact about me is that there's a folder on my computer devoted entirely to images of this guy, whose name is either Thistle or Sissel depending on which translation you're reading. According to the guidebook, which is currently in my hand, Sissel is official so we'll just go with that for the rest of the post.

I fucking love Sissel. I love Sissel so bad. There's something so wrong with this little (4'3"/130 cm) guy. Look at that image. You already know why I love Sissel. It's because he's got a rancid, unstable little megalomaniac personality and he thinks he knows better than everyone about everything.

Just look at him. My little guy. I love a bitch who meant well once but has become lost in his darkest obsessions.

But like, more coherently, I also really enjoy Sissel as a villain who starts out as this legendary figure of fear- the "Mad Sorcerer" who's presumed to be immortal and all powerful- who's then gradually revealed to be deeply, deeply pathetic. He's so lost in his obsessive protection of those he loves that he hurts them and then throws a fit when they won't forgive him. His power lies in being a master of monsters, but he's so aggressively uninterested in the creatures at his command that they're constantly dying on him and the main character turns them on him just by knowing basic ecology. He has literally infinite power at his fingertips and he's so aggressively unimaginative that he can't do anything wit hit except react to what he thinks are threats. He's built up as a final boss character and Mithrun nearly kills him in less than a minute. He whines about someone cleaning his room. My pathetic meow meow. My cringe and fail sorcerer. I fucking love this guy. He spends a whole chapter carried around as a backpack and used as a human shield. The main character forces him to eat a homecooked meal. He's so!!! Lame!!!!

Anyway it would be a literal crime for me to end a Dungeon Meshi post without any mention of women. Look at my meme boy. Look at the monster wife.

I spent. More time than I intended. Looking for the page where she tore off her shirt. This isn't nsfw this is fine this is fine

Anyway very sexy of Falin to not only haunt the narrative but come back wrong as that.

[klc-archive]

“I almost cried with laughter when I read the first script and then I met Keith-Lee Castle, who plays the Count and just looks like a rock star, and I knew it was going to be cool.” -  Donna Grant (Magda)

Daily Record interview with Donna Grant (Magda) By Samantha Booth.

Sinister, calculating and scheming is how Scots actress Donna Grant describes her character in the BBC’s new kids’ show Young Dracula. In fact, vampire mum Magda sounds quite despicable - but that’s exactly why the 30-year-old actress from Inverness was so desperate to play her.

The mum-of-one said: “I just couldn’t resist playing her because she is such a fantastically nasty character. She is a vampire and like all vampires she thinks she is better than everyone but Magda really does take it to another level. She is just so brilliantly evil.

The show is about Count Dracula’s move to Britain with his two children after his wife, Magda, has run away with a werewolf. And in tonight’s episode Magda returns to her family - although I am not saying if they welcome her back or not because, not only is she not the best mother in the world, she also broke the Count’s heart.

"But he loves her for her evil - so in a way she can do no wrong.”

Donna was intrigued by the role of Magda from the minute she heard about it and as soon as the show’s producers set eyes on the Scot, the role was hers.

She said: “I think it was a combination of me getting into the part  and because they thought I had the right look. They offered me the part on the spot.”

Since then Donna has been filming the show in the Brecon Beacons in Wales and has thoroughly enjoyed every minute if it. She said: “I almost cried with laughter when I read the first script and then I met Keith-Lee Castle, who plays the Count and just looks like a rock star, and I knew it was going to be cool”

"And it really has lived up to all of my expectations.

"The show has been great fun to film and some of my outfits have just been fantastic - I have a wedding bouquet with dead bird skulls in it.

"I know it is meant for children but I really think some adults will love it too.

"It is incredibly well written and because the whole Goth thing is pretty cool at the moment I think it could be a huge success.”

Growing up in Inverness with her mum and grandparents, Donna always wanted to act. She had an idyllic childhood, spending a lot of time out riding on her family’s horses, but when she left school as a teenager she was desperate to get out into the world and, in particular, she had her sights set on London.

She said: "I absolutely loved growing up in Inverness and, if I could, I would bring my own daughter Scarlet up in that way too – but I have to be in London just now for my work.

"But when I was 17 I was just desperate to get out and get started living and working. "I didn’t even want to go to university. I just wanted to get stuck right in.”

Luckily for Donna, some photographs she’d had taken by an Inverness photographer found their way into the hands of a London talent scout. The next thing Donna knew, she was being invited down to the city for a meeting with a top agency.

She said: “It was always acting I had wanted to do but modelling found me, so what could I do? The agency liked me and before I knew where I was, I had moved down to London and was thrown into this mad world of modelling.

"At the time it was the easy option but I quickly discovered it also meant I could make lots of money, travel and meet really interesting people so I wasn’t going to walk away from it in a hurry.” Donna did every kind of modelling, from catwalk to billboards.

She worked for a time in Japan and Germany, shot ads for Agent Provocateur and Baileys and appeared in several television commercials. BUT just because she was finding a certain level of success as a model, it didn’t mean Donna had forgotten her dream of becoming an actress.

And in 2001 she finally got her first acting job in a film called Is Harry On The Boat?, following the loves and lives of a group of young holiday reps in Ibiza and co-starring Danny Dyer and Davina Taylor.

Donna said: “It was brilliant fun to film and I’m still friends with a lot of the people I met out there in Ibiza.”

It wasn’t long until Donna found herself having to take time out from acting to have her baby daughter Scarlet, who is now three years old.

A bit of a rock chick at heart, she met Scarlet’s dad Chris McCormack, guitarist in hard rock outfit 3 Colours Red, when his band at the time, Grand Theft Audio, were supporting The Cult in concert at the Brixton Academy in London.

The pair had a whirlwind romance, married and had baby Scarlet. Donna said: “I have always been into my rock music and through modelling I did hang about with a lot of rock types at the time. So I was instantly attracted to Chris and we ended up having a whirlwind romance. Sadly, things just didn’t work out and we are now in the middle of divorce proceedings. But we really are still best friends.”

Donna now lives a much quieter life with Scarlet in north London and loves nothing better than the chance to return to Scotland to see her family and get out into the hills.

She said: “I love coming back up to Scotland and I am so excited because I just booked my tickets for Christmas so I’ll be spending the holidays at home.

"Drinking wine, eating lots of nice food and going for walks in the hills - it will just be wonderful. My life is a lot quieter now than it was a few years ago but that’s the way I like it. Where I live in London is a bit like a village so I do get the best of both worlds down there and I do like it, but nothing beats coming home.

However, I don’t think I would have settled down as well now if I hadn’t had my wild time when I was younger. It was a load of fun at the time and I met loads of amazing people. I even met some of my heroes, such as Joe Strummer from The Clash, although my most star-struck moment came when I met Chris Morris from Brass Eye. I really admire him and think he is so funny and clever but when I met him I just didn’t know what to say. I mean, because of my modelling, I am quite used to meeting famous people but when I came face to face with him all I could do was make a bit of a whimpering sound. I just thought that he is so witty and cutting he’s just going to chew me up and spit me out whatever I say. Can you imagine what he would have said to me if I had said I really liked his work? And I know I said I lead a quieter life now but my uncle has just opened up a new venue in Inverness called The Ironworks and we have Dirty Pretty Things playing there at New Year - so I might not be able to resist digging my rocker gear out once again. Especially as I will have my mum on hand to babysit.” A rock ‘n’ roll loving mum in rocker gear … Magda would be proud.

[scottxlogan]

Random Thoughts

Random thoughts. As much as I am an X-Men fan I’ve been thinking lately about X-Men Apocalypse and how that film did such a HUGE disservice not only to Oscar Isaac, who in my opinion was HORRIBLY wasted in that film, which blows my mind given that he’s such a talented actor. Like seriously how could you not want to showcase him and let him run with being such an iconic villain and deliver a story for him to sink his teeth into? *sigh*, but that’s not what I’m in the mood to talk about right now. My BIGGEST complaint about that film is the characterization of Scott Summers. It’s something that’s troubled me from when I first saw the film. 

Now let me preface this by saying that I have nothing against Tye Sheridan. Before Apocalypse came out I went and saw Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse to familiarize myself with the actor because so many people were talking about how he was such a fantastic actor and how he would be PERFECT for Scott. I was skeptical, but willing to give him a chance because Scott Summers is my favorite character. Has been for a very long time. In Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse the character Tye Sheridan plays is so much like Scott that I was hyped to see him in the role until the movie finally came out and I realized that the character he was in X-Men Apocalypse aside from crushing on Jean Grey was most certainly NOT Scott Summers. (For those who want to see Tye in a Scott type character, I’d recommend the film that I mentioned above as he was more Scott there than he was in Apocalypse.) Scott is NOT a bad boy, rule breaking, smart mouth snot. I’m sorry, but that’s never been Scott. He’s not the ‘cool dude’ or Alex’s hip little brother who is edgy like Alex is in the First Class films. 

To those who don’t read the comics, I’ll just toss this out there. In the comics Alex is the younger brother and Scott literally gets brain damage saving his brother from the trauma of jumping out of the plane when their family is being attacked and their parents ‘died’. It’s such a tragic, interesting back story that leads to the ups and downs of Scott through the years with psychotic ‘father figures’ who experiment on/torture him, force him to use his powers for evil purposes until Charles saves him. The bond between Charles and Scott is one of the strongest ones in his life even if Charles has become a bit of a tyrant over time in how he manipulated Scott to do this bidding, but that’s another story for another time. Scott’s young life before the X-Men was loaded with pain and trauma where Alex was off adopted by a family and Scott was the obsession of a madman who for some reason was obsessed with the idea of breeding the perfect genetic mutant with him and Jean Grey...again another issue here lol.

That being said though Scott is shy, awkward, a lot of people have speculated autistic as well and there’s so much about Scott in his social awkwardness and his inherent self doubt/loathing as a teen that defines the man he becomes in the future. His rise from the shy, awkward kid too afraid to admit his feelings to Jean Grey or feel he was worthy of the role of leader that Charles bestows upon him to the strategic powerhouse he becomes is lost in Fox’s lame attempt to make someone that might be marketable to an audience who thinks it’s fun to see a a bratty fun cool guy who can come up with mischief. Now I love Scott. I do, but he is neither a bratty fun guy or a prankster. His sense of humor...well, really isn’t most of the time. It doesn’t fit who he is. Bobby was a prankster and a practical joker, but Scott is very serious almost to the point where he knows he’s not the popular guy that people gravitate to. He’s not the fun guy who is the life of the party, but rather he’s the guy who gets the job done and saves the day. He’s the guy with plans for his plans, etc. and he fights for his people with all that he has taking what he’s learned through the years and applying that knowledge to doing right by mutants and humans alike. 

In a lot of ways Scott’s almost like a blend of Charles and Magneto as he’s evolved into his own man. I cannot stress enough that there is so much to LOVE about this guy, who by his beginnings had what could’ve led him to be a villain as that’s the kind of backstory he had, but regardless of the struggles and angst he became a hero and a leader. His story is so inspiring and really gives the character depth which is why he’s my favorite. Fox NEVER got that.

In the first three X-Men films, they minimized Scott’s appearance to showcase Logan, but James Marsden was a fantastic casting choice (height aside). He brought so much to the character with what little was given to him to work with. His performance is always overlooked, but James expresses so much emotion without the benefit of his eyes, which is a difficult task for actors. Some popular actors who were offered the role in Apocalypse originally turned it down for that very reason of not being able to use their eyes. James more than delivers and is very underrated. Now, none of the first films will give a casual non-comic reader the full story on Scott, but I hope that those who haven’t seen the first films take the opportunity to at least look at those films and that Scott to see a glimpse of who he is and not the character with Scott’s name and his powers that doesn’t display who he is. Now I know some people liked the version in Apocalypse, but it’s so disheartening to know that those who never read a comic or saw the old films will ever understand what makes Scott so great. He’s truly the underdog that ended up saving his people and becoming one hell of a leader. The complexities of his relationships are another dynamic of what makes him great. 

There is so much to love about Scott and it makes me sad when I see so many fans who never were able to see that because Apocalypse was their first and only view of him. They were truly cheated and to this day it always makes me want to flood the blog with information and reference to Scott so people can see just how amazing he is as a character. Heck, even X-Men Origins which has a lot of problems in it did a better teen Scott than Apocalypse is so if someone wants to see a teen Scott that shows signs of who he will become, I would recommend that film as well for that alone. Like I cannot stress enough how much I hate that so many fans will never know how great he is. I literally went back and forth with a professor about how great Scott was, but with Fox not delivering it was so hard to share to only a film goer why my favorite character is so amazing since all people see is what little inaccurate crumbs that Fox gives. *rant over* Sorry it’s just sometimes I feel like letting this out because I hate how Scott gets overlooked or changed because those in charge don’t care enough to give the guy what he really deserves in a story especially in the film world. I do hope that the MCU does better. 

[prophecydungeon]

unsurprisingly i am absolutely fucking enthralled by tucker going back to chorus to fix that particular paradox. this season did tucker right in so many ways, i'm sure people have done words about that better than i could, but specifically the way that it was tucker who had to go here was such a good choice.

i think, of all things, what really made it hit for me is when wash is rallying everyone over the radio and says "we can still do this!", and then tucker is the one that we hear say "no, you can't" in place of locus. all of this happens, tucker lets himself lose his friends, and then faces off against felix of all people -- and then felix and genkins are his audience (unwilling, uncomprehending, or otherwise) for a really fantastic character moment that honestly even without the horrid sting of 16 would have been great. sucks to lose, but it had to happen. that's war. not everyone makes it back.

and then genkins starts talking to tucker, and two things happen: genkins starts goading tucker, and tucker says out loud "[time won't crumble], because donut has a plan, and i'm sticking to it," and felix replies "wait, what?"

thing 1: genkins hits squarely on what might be lurking at the corners of tucker's mind. fuck it, what if i do kill felix? just this once? couldn't hurt, could it? and in all the ways that genkins has fucked with people and subsequently with time, this is one of my favorites. tucker feels so strongly about chorus. it's evident in what he says next! he knows that this is an instrumental part of who he is and who he's become, and he also knows that felix was the catalyst for so much pain -- not just his own, but his friends' and the rest of the planet's, too. i think tucker struggling with leadership is a great character choice for him and that 16 did it in literally the worst way possible, but 17 really, really soothed that sting with this.

i know that these are all moments that whatsherface had "scouted" for them as being important, and i can only assume that the crew's divide-and-conquer strategy involved them choosing who goes where when, so i love the idea that tucker chose this for himself. yes, i'm going to go back to the worst moment of my life. yes, i'm going to go face the person who hurt all my friends. yes, i'm going to listen to all of this bullshit that just hurt me more in the end. and i'm going to let it happen because it needs to happen, and because it made me into who i am now.

thing 2: to preface this, 11 is one of my favorite seasons of this show. i could write Big Words about why i love it so much. to pare all that down a bit, one of my favorite things about 11 is how much it works on a re-watch, when you Know about felix and locus and can go back to pick at the seams. this loop back to chorus did a great job of pulling back that curtain for us just a little further; as things shift within acceptable bounds of the paradox it's felix, this time, who takes advantage of the fray to shoot donut, and his dramatics feel both just right for the moment and incredibly transparent.

felix also, in this shift within acceptable bounds, repeatedly harps on what the fuck is wrong with cece/dos.0 because that's not part of his and locus's plan -- in 11 he's got, i think, two moments where he reacts to cece/dos.0 with genuine surprise, but i love the way it's played up here. he and locus choreographed everything ahead of time and when genkins fucks with that, the ripples really hit. felix's "wait, what?" after tucker goes off about donut's plan to seemingly-thin-air is, obviously, just flat-out confusing, but imo there's also real concern there: if tucker and donut, split apart like this, have some kind of plan, then there is something that he and locus did not account for in their choreography. (there's another essay to be written about felix, contrary to fanon, not actually being very impulsive, but rather extremely good at rolling with the punches; locus is way more impulsive than he is.)

anyways this was like a five-minute segment of the entire season and i am probably never going to shut up about it

[emotionally-traumatized-sniper]

Welcome everyone to the pinned post!

So you guys have clicked on this blog. That’s great, but you know what else is great? Getting to know exactly what you’re getting into now that you’ve actually clicked on the blog. This is a rp blog, and if you’re not into this you can easily leave me alone.

The Background

I do have like an entire large few paragraphs, but I’m not typing everything out here. Be fortunate.

Born in Australia by two New Zealand parents who had fled the island before it sank into the ocean, he never really caught a break. Two months old, his parents abandoned him, only rescued by a kind and caring couple who never had a child. What a fantastic start to his life.

Growing up wasn’t easy, being so different from everyone else and not knowing why. He still doesn’t even know about his true heritage (or the fact he has autism but like whatever-), or his actual parents besides a few very faint memories. But eventually, he had found a place in nature. He was always enamored by it, and still is, taking in the beauty when he gets the chance to.

Of course, he had an actual job to do still: shooting down animals or pests people did not want to see around. And he did pretty good. So good actually that Mann Co recruiters scouted him out to hire him. He… did not get a chance to say no. It was either take the job, or be executed because he knew too much now about the organization.

And that’s how he took the job, becoming a Sniper. He basically does the same stuff he used to, only now instead of animals, it’s people. Doesn’t seem entirely right to him still—more specifically, when it’s just a bounty target—but he had to take it.

Physical Description

Well, I do have a description. But I also have a picture! A couple, actually. But I’ll iust combine them into one for easy viewing accessibility.

Height: 6’ 2” (He’s a tall one, that’s for sure.)

Eye color: Blue (because all characters with such main character energy as him have blue eyes.)

Weight: 150 lbs (or about 68 kilograms for you non-American folk.)

Age: 25 (Awfully young, but then again he did get dragged into the workforce.)

Other features: He has an enhanced sense of hearing, able to hear things many others cannot. It’s also quite sensitive, but he has a way to deal with it sometimes.

Personality

I know this post is already very long. But you clicked on it for a reason: to read more about him! Do you get what you get, and you don’t throw a fit.

He’s somewhat easy-going, trying to be friendly to people. It doesn’t matter if they’re a member of the other team (oh yeah, if you couldn’t tell, he’s a BLU.), he’ll still try! Though his social skills aren’t the best, he’s only human after all. It could also be the autism but like who knows really.

You might have seen the “traumatized” in the blog name. You know what that means. He has so much main character energy, getting grabbed into horrors beyond his comprehension. Well, at least where I mainly use him. But this blog is different. Who knows, maybe he’ll be the true silly he can be after all!

He likes to read, look out into nature, and fish occasionally. It’s not super often, but he does have a tackle box and two rods. Why two? Don’t ask him, might not be the best idea for him to start talking about…

Other memories/qualities

Give or take within the span of a year after he joined, he was really good friends with the team’s Engineer. Besties for the resties, and probably one of the more wholesome friendships. But then, that Engineer left with little to no reason. At the time, Sniper hadn’t really tried to interact with the rest of the team, so really the only person he cared about and cared for him was gone. Left a pretty deep emotional scar, and it’s still painful.

He has some gifts from his parents, such as an old guiding light style candle lamp thing. Yes, he does have a flashlight, but sometimes he uses that instead when it fits. The teeth on his hat? Partially gifted, partially stolen (from when the animals stuck their teeth in his flesh, obviously /hj). He has a few others, you might just have to ask him!

Remember when I said he had a way of dealing with his sensitive hearing? It doesn’t have an off switch, meaning it can cause a huge problem trying to sleep at night. So he uses a pair of earmuffs when he wants to sleep. Usually, it works. Other times, he’s up all night. Depends on the conditions, really.

His main goal in life? I do not know why you’d ask that, but I know it and will still share it to you. He tries to logically connect events and phenomena, even when there isn’t a meaning or reason behind it. Someone definitely took the all history links message a little too far (/j). Sometimes, this caused more stress for him than it does relieve it, as much as he tells himself.

So what does he do with all the stress? Mostly, bottling it up and hiding it. Can’t be a professional of you’re too emotional out on the battlefield, after all! Once the bottle breaks… it can get pretty messy. It’s not super easy, but it’s been broken before by a few people.

Where this leads off

So, now I need to make a statement about where he’s off in life right now. Where exactly am I setting this timeline split? Well, I’m just about to do that, be more patient. I know this is a long post, but you don’t need to get so rushed!

After Engineer left, and he managed to catch his bearings, he’s trying to settle into the base and the community he’s part of—being a mercenary—a little better. Maybe you can strike up some conversation, or maybe he’ll get dragged into some undeniable horror, or maybe he’ll just rot alone. Who knows? Not me, that’s for sure.

[kingmystrie]

The Killer Magicals

story notes because I gotta formalize these ideas a bit more since i should have to flesh out how exactly the last planned antagonists go about their business, we have the killer magical group who's goal is to stop witches before they're born by well killing other magicals. I think this would be akin to being a terrorist group?

the group was formed after Angel, an incubator, decided to try and recruit two magical girls kyubey made contracts with to well, actually "stop witches". He knew that any magical who'd be willing to do this task would likely be a little… too enthusiastic for the job, but what he didn't realize is how quickly it would spiral out of control.

We have the two leaders of the group:

"Morningstar"

The main head of the operation. Often goes against Angel's interests, primarily by not really trying to get more recruits, the only time she really gets anyone involved is if she thinks their wish is something she can exploit or if Angel is bugging on her case to expand operations.

Wish: "I want my death to be fantastic"

Motive: Wants to be infamous, since making her wish she gained an ungodly amount of confidence and her ambition to have people remember her forever has only grown. She simply decided that it's easier to be known for bad reasons. Her thought is that magicals will especially hate her because of the betrayal, as most magicals stick together and help eachother. She has too much fun.

Kishi

Second in command, however is the real brains of the whole group. She's bought into Angel's arguments and actually hopes that by involving herself in this it will bring some kind of purpose to her life. Or at the very least, bring some closure to it.

Wish: Undecided, original idea was "Make me want to live again"

Motive: Lack of purpose in life, suicidal, looking for a way out of the haze of living just because dying would be sad for other people. Angel gave her something to work towards, even if it's something... abhorrent.

Subordinates have varieties of reasons to be following them, ranging from being coerced to wanting to see the world burn. However, there's a high turnover rate, and people who leave don't leave alive.

Arniela ends up being scouted and is forced to join under the threat of their family being hurt.

[originalwinnercheesecake]

My Personal Ranking of the CBS ghosts season 1.

 Okay so I gave CBS ghosts a chance about a year ago when I kept seeing the trailer and thought it sounded like a cool idea. Honesty I am big fan. Yes the first 3-4 epsidoes drag some, yes even after it picks up its cliche sometimes. But the show isn’t going for some fantastical, new original, no one has seen before. Its a American reboot of an already existing British comedy (I have not seen BBC, I do not have the streaming service it is on), that’s goal is just have colorful characters, make it’s audience laugh, and have the occasional really deep/sweet moments sprinkled into the comedy. For those goals I would say it succeeds. I laugh at most episodes, and a lot of the sweet moments (Alberta telling Issac about her father, Jay pulling out all the stops to for Sam during their homemade prom) hit. As for the characters I wanted to do a ranking list for them all through season 1, but never got around to it. With season 2 about to start I am telling myself that I cannot watch an episode until I do this. From the bottom up. slight spoilers may be below for anyone who hasn’t finished season 1

12.) Elias Woodstone: I do not like him as a person, or as a villain. I can generally “like a villain as a villain” when they are written to be very good at being bad.But Elias was bad in a way that was not funny, it was disgusting. When he learned what happened to people he walked through, he did it them on purpose. I am glad he is in Hell

11.) Stephanie: The cliche bratty teen, mean girl.I kinda understand why; she died on what was supposed to be this really magical night, and never got to finish growing up. Feeling sorry for her is not the same thing as liking her though. Her needing to sleep 364 days a year also kinda turns the lights out on most stores and development she can receive.

10.) Flower: Flower has felt human to me exactly once. When she talked about Basketball, how she played it a lot as a living and was really knowledgeable about it, but because she is a women who grew up in the 40′s-50′s before dying in the 60′s no one took her talent or knowledge seriously. Other than that one time I have found her completely unfunny, and to just be a collection of every annoying pot-head and stupid hippy cliche I have seen in every other sitcom and cartoon to contain potheads and hippies. I do not blame her actress. Of the main casts of ghosts, Flower and Sass get the least screen time, Maybe with more time the actress and could get more of a handle on flower and make her better. Maybe.

9.) Nigel Chessum: Okay let me make it clear I do not dislike Nigel. I think he and Issac are cute. The reason he is so low is that in season 1 he shows up so little we do not learn anything about him more than “Cute British guy next door”. I fully expect to move him up on this list once we see more of him in season 2.

8.) Nancy: Nancy was in 3-4 episodes last season, with 1-2 minor appearance and 2 bigger ones. I did not like the way she treated Pete in her first big appearance (how she kept embarrassing him and then threatened him). But by the next episode she really grew on me , and I love that her and Pete become real friends once she is able to help him to start standing up for himself. Also I am glad that she has not been forgotten about in season 2. Here’s to hoping she will make no less than 4 appearances this season too.

7.) Pete Martino: Pete is a nice guy, and I don’t mean that as in a “nice guy” (Yet,. Please don’t tun him into one later down the road), I mean that as in he is a genuinely nice guy. I love his bromance with Jay, and I am rooting form him and Alberta to eventually get together... While I like most of his stories I just do not think his whole boy scout schimick is as funny as some of the other characters.

6.) Trevor Lefkowitz: If I say “suit wearing playboy who works a sleazy uper-class wall street type job in NY,but is actually a real bro and a not completely terrible person” am I talking about Trevor or Barney Stinson. Well if I said that “the comedy of them is Legend-wait for it-dairy” I would be talking about Barney Stinson. If I said “You know what? They are kinda cool” I would be talking about Trevor Lefkowitz. Trevor is a pretty funny, kinda cool character. But he is written so much like a Stinson knock-off, and no one is ever gonna top Neil Patrick Harris’s performance as Barney in regards to that particular genera of playboy.

4-5, 4&5?) Hetty Woodstone & Issac Higgentoot: Do not make me chose between these two besties. My opinions on them are largely similar. I think both characters faltered some in the beginning of the show when the writers and actors were not sure completely how to portray them. But that once the characters were understood they hit it out in almost every episode. I also think these two had some of the best exploration/development out of everyone in season 1. I loved watching Hetty re-examine her life and beliefs, and become more of a modern day feminist, while still maintaining the elegance and class from her time. Issac is the first time I have seen a closeted queer character in a sitcom be in control of deciding when they want to publicly express that part of their identity, and up until they decided to them not being ready was written as being a fair reason to wait, that other character respected. It should be portrayed that way every time, but for the sake of drama it isn't. It was nice to see here.

3.) Thorfinn: The big, burly, scared up guy with a questionable past...is actually a big softie and adores small children and animals. This is one Cliche that I absolutely love and am here for. It doesn’t hurt either that Thor is absolutely hilarious. He had to be in my top three.

2.) Sassappis .Sass is in my opinion the funniest ghost out of them all. I love his dry wit and cynical humor, and I have since all the way back in episode 4, when he pretended to be an accountant who died at a Halloween party (and was totally convincing at it for a second). The reason he is second is that he was just criminally absent and underused in season 1. More Sasappis in season 2.

Da da da daa

1.) Alberta Haynes: Can we give a round of applause to Danielle Pinnock? Is it any wonder I put Alberta as the top when this actress has brought A level game to her character since the beginning and with each thing we learn about Alberta, Danielle’s acting has only gone up. Alberta is loud, she is sassy, she is boss, and powerful, You really feel her sadness when talking about how racism kept her father down in his career, and she feels like she let him down because it affected hers as well. You feel for her again when she tells Pete that when alive she always chose bad guys because maybe deep down she thought that she didn’t deserve to be with a good man, and now she thinks she missed every chance.

Alberta killed at season 1 and there is so much they can still do with her in season 2. Give me more backstory, work on solving her murder, work on getting her and Pete together (they are a slow burn right?), with her connection to Alexa put her in charge of music stations at the B&B, she would be good at it.

That’s my feelings on the Ghosts for season 1. IF you want my feelings on the livings. Farnsby neighbors are annoying. the construction guy Mark is alright. I like Jay as a main better than Sam, because he has more of a range of emotions happy/sad/excited/concerned/mad, while Sam’s type-A personality seems to means she always has to act perky and almost always has to be enthusiastic.