#hilarious to put him against these four but w/e

[todayisafridaynight]

Nishiki: I want my ex DEAD.

Majima: I have 10 years of repressed gay energy I need to release in a WEEK.

Mine: The man I respect and have a crush on is a vegetable, so I’m going against his wish to let his dad take over for him and take over Tojo myself.

Aoki/Masato: I jUsT wAnT pOwEr AnD cOnTrOl.

Ryuji: Nothin’ personal, Kiryu, but this country is large enough for only one dragon, and his name is Ryuji Goda.

thank you for the nutshell version of yakuza antagonists. why is majima here

[inevitably-johnlocked]

Hi Steph! reading your blog has become a sort of guilty pleasure for me. Thanks for everything, it’s so clear that you put a lot of time and energy into your content. I was wondering if you have any johnlock fics that feature a particularly well-written or memorable original character? I always love to see how authors integrate their own character creations into johnlock stories!

Hey Nonny!

Ahhhh!! This is a GREAT request, because I like well-written OC’s in fics, so yeah, this is a great list to make. Here’s what I recall from my bookmarks. Please add your own faves, friends!

MEMORABLE ORIGINAL CHARACTERS

Ex by Itsallfine (T, 1,248 w., 1 Ch. || Angsty Fluff, Love Confessions, Coming Out, Exes, First Kiss, Fake Relationship, Getting Outed) – One night, in the midst of their post-case high and on the cusp of something more, John and Sherlock run into John’s ex. His ex-boyfriend.

The Prize We Sought Is Won by deathfrisbees (E, 4,610 w., 1 Ch. || First Time, Mild D/S, Oral, Military Kink, Bottomlock) – Sherlock's in love, or in lust, or both--unfortunately, the object of his affections is not only his completely oblivious flatmate, but said flatmate would probably run screaming into the hills should he find out. John's been invited to a wedding--unfortunately, the groom used to serve under him back in Afghanistan, and requests that John wear a uniform he's honestly not sure he fits into. Unfortunately for both flatmates, Sherlock's got a military kink the size of Kandahar and John wants to know if he actually can fit into this uniform or if his eyes are deceiving him. It goes from there.

Time on my hands by Mildredandbobbin (M, 7,179 w., 1 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Post-S3, One Night Stands, Mutual Pining, Virgin Sherlock, First Time, Sexual Exploration / Discovery, Desperation, Body Worship) – Virginity’s a construct, a concept—what does losing one’s virginity entail for a gay man anyway? Sherlock wants to fill that particular gap in his knowledge but John won’t, can’t, never will assist and there’s only so much desperately unspoken pining even Sherlock can take.

High and Tight, Soft and Loose by cwb (E, 7,429 w., 1 Ch. || Jealous John, Miscommunications / Misunderstandings, First Kiss / Time, BAMF John, Insecure Sherlock, Clueless Sherlock, POV John, Embarrassed John, Adorable Sherlock, Junk Size, UST / RST) – John pressed the knuckle of his index finger against his mouth and sighed. “So, you're coiled like a spring and ready to be ... sprung?” “If you want to be pedestrian about it, yes.” “Like I said, you should do something about that.” “And like I said, pedestrian. What would you have me do? Take up jogging? Yoga? Oh! Unless you mean –” “I don't mean anything. Let’s drop it.”

Matters of National Security by mistyzeo (E, 8,465 w., 1 Ch. || BAMF John, Doctor John, Jealous Sherlock, Dating, Bisexuality, Arguing, Stupidity, Teasing, First Kiss/Time, Hand Jobs, Frottage, RST, Idiots in Love) – John starts dating a male client of Sherlock's, and Sherlock can't figure out why he's so incensed about it.

High Tide by stardust_made (T, 8,540 w., 1 Ch. || Jealousy, Angst, First Kiss) – A little favour Sherlock stupidly agrees to do for Mycroft leads to John meeting a handsome, affluent man, who is going out of his way to woo him. Sherlock struggles with the situation and with his own reactions to it. Part 1 of The High Tide Series

Iris by slashscribe (E, 11,948 w., 1 Ch. || Parentlock, Pining Sherlock, Post-S3) – Sherlock does his best to make John happy when John comes back to 221B with his new baby after the events of Season 3, but Sherlock has a track record of getting things wrong in this area. This story is an exploration of their gradual shift from friends to lovers, told from Sherlock's perspective, full of a lot of pining and lack of emotional awareness.

A Brand of Gold by aquabelacqua (M, 12,757 w., 1 Ch. || Mutual Pining, POV John, Phone Sex, Texting, Masturbation, Long Distance, Drunk Texting) – What am I doing? he wondered. The answer came back at once: Flirting. He let the vital, missing piece snap into place as surely and as cleanly as if it had always been there. He was flirting with Sherlock Holmes.

Twelfth Night by yourdykeinshiningarmor (E, 15,139 w., 5 Ch. || Fake Relationship, Christmas, Mutual Pining, Friends to Lovers, Angst & Fluff, BJ’s, Anal) – John is invited to his aunt's Twelfth Night ball. Sherlock offers to attend with him as a friendly face among strangers, but John's family force him to address his true feelings for Sherlock.

Vessel by Rhuia (E, 15,695 w., 1 Ch. || Cancer, Medfic) – That was the surprising bit – the way his doctor said it, eyes shining with sympathy but breathing it out, shifting it off her shoulders and thrusting it onto his, making him take it like an unwanted gift.

A Life Well-Lived by Kate_Lear (E, 20,121 w., 1 Ch. || Original Male Character, Sherlock Woos John, Jealous Sherlock, Reluctant Bi-John, Past Abuse, Insecure John, Reassuring / Caring Sherlock, Protective Sherlock, Understanding Sherlock) – John got scared off men by an abusive past relationship. Sherlock has to try and woo him while not scaring him off with protective possessive rage.

Winter's Delights by Kate_Lear (E, 21,173 w., 1 Ch. || Holmes Family, Christmas, Fake Relationship, Friends to Lovers, Bed Sharing, Domestics) – Sherlock takes John home for Christmas to meet the extended Holmes family. Part 1 of Winter's Delights

A Shipless Ocean by myswordfishmind (M, 22,135 w., 4 Ch. || Post-TRF, John has a Kid, Angst, Reunion, Falling in Love, Open Ending) – Ten years after the fall Sherlock goes back to London to find that John no longer lives there. Instead, he resides in a seaside town, a widower, and the father of a seven year old son. Now, Sherlock must struggle with the fact that there may no longer be a place for him in this new world.

Maintaining A Personal Life by Gingerhermit (E, 24,284 w., 6 Ch. || Alternating POV’s, Bisexuality, BAMF!John, Jealous Sherlock, Romance / Drama, Sort-of Case Fic, Peril & Angst, Love Confessions, Toplock, Soft Idiots in Love, Post S3) – Sherlock and John discover some interesting revelations about each other’s sexuality, which lead them both to question the assumptions they've made about one another for years. In the midst of their mutual discoveries, a dangerous psychopath looms on the side-lines who threatens to destroy their new beginning.

26 Pieces by Lanning (E, 28,236 w., 1 Ch. || H/C, Torture, First Time, Happy Ending, Schmoop, Past Abuse) – Mycroft gives Sherlock the apparently simple task of solving a puzzle box containing a stolen microchip. It isn't simple.

Where Else Would I Be? by cwb (E, 34,910 w., 10 Ch. || Retirementlock, Domestic Fluff, Falling in Love, Parentlock, Fluff and Smut, Reminiscing) – John and Sherlock's five-year-old granddaughter spends the weekend with them in Sussex. Sherlock happily indulges her whims, and John takes care of them while quietly revisiting the past thirty years of their lives together.

Classified(s) by blueink3 (E, 36,153 w., 4 Ch. || Wedding Date AU || Fake Relationship, Jealous, PIning, H/C, Idiots in Love, Happy Ending, Mary is not Nice, Escort Service) – Clara's American father is the ambassador to some such territory that Great Britain probably used to own, but she (and Harry’s undying love for her) is the reason John is getting on a flight at 12:30pm, flying across the second largest ocean in the world, and pretending to be in a perfectly happy, healthy relationship with an undoubtedly perfectly coiffed stranger. See, Clara is not only American (and wealthy to boot), she's also best friends with John’s ex-fiancée. Whom she's placed in the wedding party. As Maid of Honor. And John just happens to be Best Man. Bloody brilliant.

Nothing to Make a Song About by emmagrant01 (E, 36,833 w., 10 Ch. || Post-TRF, First Time, Reunion, Jealous John, Pining Sherlock, Romance, Angst with Happy Ending, Sherlock Has a Boyfriend) – When Sherlock returned from his faked death, John could not forgive him for the deception and broke off their friendship. Ten years later, John returns to London in search of yet another new beginning. Sherlock, not surprisingly, is waiting.

Set in Stone by SilentAuror (E, 39,309 w., 1 Ch. || Romance, Wedding, Therapy, Fluff and Angst) – Sherlock and John are back from Ravine Valley and planning their wedding. However, as they move past the trial of the human traffickers, Sherlock can't help but wonder if he's imagining that John is becoming a little distant. Surely he isn't getting cold feet about the wedding... Part 2 of The Ravine Valley series

Only To Be With You by SinceWhenDoYouCallMe_John (M, 40,768 w., 4 Ch. || Black Mirror / Future AU || Character Death, Future Technology, Sickness/Cancer/Illness, Heavy Angst with Happy Ending, First Person POV John, Pining John, Heart-Wrenching Angst, Promise of Forever) – I tell myself that next time I’ll come near this same place again. Wait around for the mysterious stranger in his coat to dash past me, hot on the heels of a new criminal in black. I think this all the way back to my Exit, planning where I’ll wait and what I’ll say when I see him. Scheming on how to get his name. It’s only once I reach the Exit Point door that I realize two hours and forty-five minutes have passed, and I realize that this won’t be the last time I Visit. It won’t be the last time at all.

Corpus Hominis by mycapeisplaid (E, 47,709 w., 12 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Case Fic, Fluff, Romance, Frottage, Angst, Anal, Blow Jobs, Rimming, Spas / Massages, Shampoo, Jealousy, Fake Relationship) - John knows the human body intimately. He’s had plenty of opportunity for study as a doctor, soldier, and lover. There’s one particular body, however, he knows very little about. When Sherlock launches himself head-first into a new obsession and they get sent on a case in an unlikely location, the pair discovers each other’s bodies with confusing yet delightful (and sometimes hilarious) results.

The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse by SilentAuror (E, 50,635 w., 1 Ch. || Post-S4/S4 Divergence, Case Fic, For a Case / Reverse Fake-Relationship, Conferences, Marriage Equality, Travelling / New York, Pride, Homophobia, Bottomlock, Marriage Proposal, John POV, Sexuality, Love Confessions, Emotional Love Making, Public Hand Jobs, Blow Jobs, Passionate Kissing, Needy/Clingy Sherlock, Virgin Sherlock, Touching / Hand Holding, Bed Sharing, Little Spoon Sherlock, Intense Orgasms) – John and Sherlock go to New York to attend a conference run by the National Defence of Traditional Marriage Coalition in order to investigate the potential bombing of the annual Manhattan Pride parade. As the conference unfolds, John finds himself repulsed by the toxic ideology being presented, which becomes relevent to his own unacknowledged issues and his friendship with Sherlock...

Coventry by standbygo (E, 52,020 w., 26 Ch. || Dollhouse AU || Case Fic, Slow Burn, Sci-Fi / Fantasy, First Kiss / Time, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, BAMF John, Falling in Love) – “Let me get this straight,” John said, wondering when his life had become a science fiction film. “Some guy orders up a personality, a person, to his specifications, and they program this into a real live person, who has consented to do this, and she goes to this person and acts as his wife, or lawyer, or Royal Marine, or Navy Seal or what have you, and she has all the skills, all the knowledge, everything? Then you say the magic words, and she follows you back to The House, and they erase it all until her next appointment?”

Albion and the Woodsman by Glenmore (NR [E], 54,437 w., 50 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Post S3, Parentlock, Pining Sherlock, Angst, Family, Drug Use, Depression, Sherlock POV, Light Humour, Reconnecting, Declarations of Love) – Sherlock and John are devastated after Mary Morstan makes her final moves. Sherlock relapses at the crack house, John walks around the world … and a lot happens in between. Parentlock, in the good way.

Wars We Fought, Things We're Not by blueink3 (M, 55,204 w., 10 Ch. || Post S3 / Post TAB, Parentlock, Fluff & Angst, Kidnapping, Whump, Post-TAB, UST/URT, 3G, Mild Peril, Slow Burn, Couple for a Case, Protective Mycroft, Infant Death Pre-Story, Friends to Lovers) –  Five months after John's world has fallen apart, Mycroft sends the consulting detective and his doctor on a case that neither is prepared for.

Isosceles by SilentAuror (E, 56,609 w., 7 Ch. || Post-S4, POV John, Original Male Character / Sherlock Dates Another Man, Love Triangle, Jealous John, Virgin Sherlock, Sexual Coaching, Angst, Romance, Domesticity, Unrequited Feelings, Miscommunication, First Kiss/Time, For a Case, Friends With Benefits, Bottomlock, Love Confessions, Spooning) – After solving a case for a major celebrity, Sherlock gets himself asked out. When John asks, he discovers that Sherlock has no intention of going, at least not until John agrees to coach him through whatever he might need to know for his date...

The Great Sex Olympics of 221B by XistentialAngst (E, 58,611 w., 10 Ch. || First Time/Kiss, Experiments / Sexual Experimentations, Multi Pairings, Voyeurism) – John Watson thinks Sherlock Holmes should admit that he, Watson, is more of an expert on sex than Sherlock is. But Sherlock refuses to concede the point. He comes up with an experiment plan that will resolve the issue. The results will determine who wins the prize. But sometimes even the best thought-out scientific study has unexpected consequences.

Bridging the Ravine by SilentAuror (E, 58,887 w., 3 Ch. || Post S4, Couple For a Case, Bed-Sharing, First Times, Confessions, Awkwardness, Sex Trafficking, Massages, Wet T-Shirt Contest, Group Therapy, Past Loss of Child) – Sherlock and John go undercover at Ravine Valley, a therapy centre for same-sex male couples in an investigation into a possible human trafficking ring. As they pose as a couple and fake their way through the therapy sessions for the sake of the case, it quickly becomes difficult to avoid discussing their very real issues. Set roughly six nine months after series 4.

The Bells of King's College by SilentAuror (E, 64,019 w., 5 Ch. || Post-S4, Missed Opportunities, Angst with Happy Ending, Fake Relationship, Case Fic, John POV, Jealous John, John in Denial, Travelling / Holidays, Virgin Sherlock, Wedding Proposals) – It's only been two weeks since Eurus Holmes disrupted their lives when Mycroft sends John and Sherlock to Cambridge to pose as an engaged couple at a wedding show in the hopes of solving six unsolved deaths...

Summit Fever by J_Baillier (M, 78,802 w., 18 Ch. || Mountain Climber AU || POV John, Angst, Tragedy, Suicidal Ideation, The Himalayas, Mountain Guide / Doctor John, Mount Climber Sherlock, Loneliness, Drama, Suspense, Slow Burn, Injured Sherlock / Sherlock Whump, Pining John) – After graduating from medical school, John Watson followed his heart to the Himalayas. Ten years later, he's a haunted cynic working for his ex-lover's trekking and mountaineering company. Will leading an expedition to Annapurna I—the most lethal of all the world's highest mountains—shake John out of his reverie, and who is the mystery client added to the group at the last minute?

Secrets and Revelations by Hisstah (E, 83,535 w., 9 Ch. || Sentinel / Guides Omegaverse AU || Adventure, Violence, Anal / Oral, Omega!John / Alpha!Sherlock, Case Fic, Politics, Mild DubCon) – Dr John Watson has some major secrets that he's kept from his flatmate, Alpha Sentinel Sherlock Holmes. Now the Sentinel Tower is after him. Can John stay out of their hands until he can reveal his secrets to Sherlock? Part 1 of Secrets and Revelations

Thermocline by J_Baillier (M, 83,557 w., 14 Ch. || Scuba Diving AU || Adventure, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Marine Archaeology, Asexual Sherlock, Horny John, Relationship Drama, Technical/Scuba/Wreck Diving, Slow Burn, Underwater /  Medical Peril, Doctor John, Hurt Sherlock, Anxious Sherlock, John POV, Protective John, Body Appreciation) – John "Five Oceans" Watson — technical dive instructor, dive accident analyst and weapon of mass seduction — meets recluse professor of maritime archaeology Holmes. As they head out to a remote archipelago off the coast of Guatemala to study and film its shipwrecks for a documentary, will sparks fly or fizzle out?

Maintenance and Repair by patternofdefiance (E, 106,650 w., 71 Ch. || Future AU, Augmentation || Augmented John, Depression, Body Modification, Slow Burn, Worldbuilding, Sci-Fi, Self-Care, Body Dysmorphia) – John wants to explain the rush of sensation and data, which is just another form of sensation (or is it the other way around?). John wants to say: Augmentation circuits report temperature, pressure, various forms of quantitative input. Sudden changes are reported as pain, since sudden changes are dangerous, and pain is the quickest way to encourage reflexive extraction. But all John can manage is, “Nng.” Because this sudden touch is not reporting as pain. Part 2 of STATIC

The Burning Heart by May_Shepard (M, 119,150 w., 21 Ch. || Canon Divergence, Post-TRF, John’s Sexuality, S3 Rewrite, Pining, Angst with a Happy Ending, POV John Watson, John’s Gay) – When Sherlock dies, John Watson feels like his life is over too. He’s completely shut down, until Mark Morstan, a new nurse at John’s medical clinic, catches his attention, and helps him uncover the long buried truth of his attraction to men. Although he’s certain he’ll never get over Sherlock, John plans to move on, and build a new life with Mark, unaware that Sherlock is not quite as dead as he appears, and that Mark is hiding secrets of his own.

The Swan Triad Series by Pennin_Ink (T, 121,660 w. across 3 works || Swan Lake AU || Magical / Fairy Tale AU, Romance, Falling in Love, Pining, Psychological Torture, Transformation) – Sherlock and John grow up spending every summer together. Their mothers' attempts to play matchmaker only fuel their mutual resentment and scorn. But then, one summer.

Colors by Quesarasara (E, 140,537 w., 17 Ch. || Pleasantville-Inspired AU || Soulmates, Colour Bonds, Alternating POV, Angst, Fluff, Pining, Case Fic, Medical Procedures) – Everyone on earth is born with eyes that see in black, white, and an endless series of greys. When you meet your soulmate, you finally see the world in color. We're all searching for the person who brings color to our lives. John and Sherlock are no exception. Part 1 of The Colors 'Verse

The Adventure of the Silver Scars by tangledblue (NR [M], 142,458 w., 41 Ch. || S3 Fix-It, Post-HLV/ Post-TAB / Canon Compliant, Case Fic, No Baby, Angst, Humour, UST, Slow Burn, Angry John, Reconciliation, Not Nice Mary / Leaving Mary, Dependent Sherlock, Pining Sherlock, Caretaker John, Fist Fights, It’s An Experiment, Virgin Sherlock, Dancing, Drugging, John Whump, Pet Names, Sherlock’s Mind Palace, Scars) – It’s been thirteen months since Mary shot Sherlock and John finds he’s still pissed off about it. Sherlock had thought everything was settled: John and Mary, domestic bliss. But when John turns up at Baker Street with suitcases, the world’s only consulting detective might not be prepared for the consequences. A new case. Some old scores to settle. Certain danger. Concertos, waltzes, and whisky.

The Lost Special: Family Matters (As Do Relationships) by ShirleyCarlton  (M, 144,688 w., 40 Ch. || S4 Fix It Fic, Unreliable Narrator, John’s Mind Bungalow, Friends to Lovers, Happy Ending) – Sherrinford is not really the name of some high security prison. That was just a figment of John’s frantic coma dream. And Eurus is not actually Sherlock’s sister. That’s just something random she said to John before shooting him. Sherlock and John were never actually estranged. That was just their act to cover up what really happened to Mary – or Rosamund Moran, as her real name has turned out to be. Sherlock does have a secret sibling, though, and his name is Sherrinford. After finally eliminating Moran – though in a rather dramatically different way than they had envisioned – and exposing the truth about Eurus, John encourages Sherlock to delve into his past and to find out whether the reasons to keep Sherrinford away from Sherlock were the right ones, and to discover what really happened in 1981. Along the way, Sherlock and John gradually, finally, stop keeping each other at a distance, and eventually become a proper family of their own. (SC’s version of Sherrinford may as well be an OC; he’s well written and different from Canon)

Sketchy by serpentynka (E, 184,053 w., 83 Ch. || Post-TRF, Post-Mary, John Whump, Slow Burn Love Story, Case Fic, Art, Porn With Feelings, Switchlock, Travelling, Career Change, Family Secrets, Illness / Health) – What (and who) will be left when nobody cares about your Work? A slow-burn fic with cases, places, mistaken identities, unfair choices, essential changes, violent feels, blatant lies, fearless portraiture, family secrets, high-risk bespoke gifts, durable friendships, bedtime stories, foreign travel and tongues, sickness (and health), and the significance of things which are slow to unfurl -- but cannot be ignored. Oh, and...porn. Part 1: Sherlock takes on an obvious case (barely a 4) and meets someone who will force him to re-examine what it means to see. Part 1 of Sketchy

The Gilded Cage by BeautifulFiction (E, 326,887 w., 31 Ch. || Omegaverse || Omega Sherlock / Alpha John, Friends to Lovers, Dub Con, Reproductive Rights) – In a world where Omegas are the property of the elite Alphas, locked away and treasured by those wealthy enough to buy them, John never questioned his flatmate's secondary gender. Sherlock Holmes was an Alpha through-and through. Wasn't he? A chance discovery turns the world on its head, and John is left grappling to come to terms with Sherlock's past as events conspire to threaten their future.

[perriewinklenerdie]

Married (Ethan Ramsey x MC)

Pairing: Ethan Ramsey x Claire Herondale

Word count: 2,4 k

Summary: Parts of Ines’s wedding told from Ethan’s perspective feat. E&C dancing, staring at each other during the wedding, basically being a married couple and everyone calling them out for it. OH3 Chapter 11 added content.

Warnings: None, it’s fluff town all the way

A/N: I feel scammed by PB. All the golden opportunities - wasted. So I fixed it.

His shoes sank a bit in the sand as he began walking towards the venue. More and more people were beginning to arrive, sounds of conversation and laughter increasing by the minute. He recognized his coworkers with ease and approached them. The first to notice him is Tobias, his eyebrow arching slightly at the sight of him.

“You came alone? Where’s Herondale?” he asked, looking over Ethan’s shoulder to search for the blonde resident.

“She helped me fix my tie, then kicked me out of our room. And refused to let me see the dress.” He explained, shrugging with a helpless laugh. Harper laughed along with him, clapping her hands gently.

“That’s wife behavior. Are you sure you two aren’t married?”

“Dude, if you two eloped, I’m not going to be working out with you anymore.” Bryce chimed in, acting as though he was offended, a serious look overtaking his face.

“Where would you- why would you- “ Ethan started stumbling over his words, realizing only after a moment that everyone was smirking at him teasingly. He huffed, fighting a blush that creeped onto his cheeks anyway. “I see. You all think you’re funny.”

“You make it too easy, Ethan.” Harper giggled, shaking her head.

“And we know we’re funny, Ethan.” His mentor put his hand on his shoulder sympathetically.

“Hilarious, even.” Baz added.

A small sound of an incoming message caused everyone to stop talking. Sienna unlocked her phone, her eyes scanning the screen.

“Claire just texted me a photo of her in a dress.”

Immediately, everyone jumped to her side, long before Ethan could even move his finger. Once he woke up from the daze, he took a step towards the young doctor that he considered his friend. Zaid stopped him in his tracks with a hand pressed to his shoulder.

“She said to not let you see the photo.”

“Why?”

Her voice rang from behind him. “I wanted to see your reaction myself.”

Ethan turned around and, at once, his breath caught in his throat. His gaze dropped to her shoes and dragged up her body slowly. The gentle flow of her skirt, pink silk that he knew for sure would almost spill through his fingers. The bodice, snug against her chest, accentuating her curves and making his male brain run wild. Careful to not linger on her chest too long – he would not get crap from their friends for this – he finally looked at her face. She was grinning smugly with a bit of a nervous spark.

He stepped up to her, resting his hand on the dip of her waist, tracing the floral patterns under his touch. With his other hand, he grasped hers in a gentle manner, raising it to press a warm kiss to her fingers.

“You’re taking my breath away.” he muttered, staring at her intensely.

“Hypoxia is dangerous, maybe I should go.” Claire teased, leaning away a fraction of an inch. He immediately pushed on her back to stop her, their personal spaces merging.

“Not having you by my side is fatal.” He dropped his voice to a low rumble, her grin melting into the soft smile. Their lips met in a slow kiss, no heat to it, just pure emotions.

They remained like that for a prolonged moment, his hands carefully pressing her to his chest. He shifted his weight from one foot to the other, making their bodies move in a swaying motion.

Jackie burst their bubble. “You, lovebirds, the brides are about to arrive, cut it out.”

Ethan pressed his lips to Claire’s one last time, then leaned away. Their noses brushed against one another as their eyes met. He whispered gently. “I’ll come find you after the ceremony.”

She pecked his cheek sweetly. “Can’t wait.”

--

He wasn’t particularly a fan of weddings. He wasn’t invited to a lot of them, either. If combined with his dislike for big social gatherings, one would come to the conclusion that Ethan Ramsey was miserable right in that moment.

Nothing could be further from the truth.

As Ines and Angie exchange vows and talk about their love for each other, his eyes find Claire. Sitting in her chair across the aisle, she’s holding Sienna’s hand and passing her a tissue. She’s all anyone could ever ask for, and the mere sight of her makes him fall down into the void of memories.

How far he’s come as a person. A cynic that dreaded what a new year would bring along with a new batch of interns. A man that had only two people in his life that he could call friends. A man that went to the bar every night to forget the day behind him, only to go back to his empty apartment. All of that was so long ago that he barely recognized that version of himself anymore. He was so different now.

He smiled more. Laughed, even, and found that he didn’t find stupid jokes Lahela made all the time half as annoying as he once did. He didn’t spend every waking moment at work. Instead, he enjoyed his time off. Still at a bar, but not to drink away his worries. Not alone – not anymore.

Now, he had someone to come home to.

Claire shook her head as she laughed at what Zaid said and Ethan’s heartbeat quickened. They grew together as people too, and along with that, their relationship evolved.

From the night they spent together in the NICU, when her head slowly fell onto his shoulder and he couldn’t find a single cell in his body to tell him to lean away. Because he wanted her to be close. It was the first moment in which he thought that maybe this brilliant woman was meant to be more to him than just an intern – and right after that, he squashed the idea back down.

Every hold of her hand, every silent sign of support, he cherished it all. Unknowingly falling deeper for the woman that would become the center of his universe before he realized what was happening.

Their kiss in Miami would be at the forefront of his mind in his every living second until he kissed her again. Growing stronger with each time his resolve broke and their lips met, softly or with wild abandonment.

The first time he could call her his – the first time he had her to himself. He knew in that moment that he was ruined for everyone else. No one would ever make him feel that way, ever again. He knew it damn well – and yet, he still fought against it.

Absence makes heart grow fonder. He now knew it was true. Months he spent away from her, keeping her at arm’s length, taught him as much. How could he deny those words when the moment he pulled her closer to him outside his apartment and their lips touched, he felt his mind go blank and his heart stop. He vowed to never let her leave again. To never lose her.

And then he almost did.

The thought alone made his muscles spasm, and he was a millisecond away from running to her side, just to feel her warmth and hear her heartbeat. Leaving her side now, even if only for a moment, even to do their job, caused a silent voice to go off in his head. A wave of panic usually followed, staying with him until he saw her again.

Thankfully, nowadays, she was within his reach most of the time. She never asked why he sometimes needed to pull her close and just hold onto her – she knew.

He felt the corners of his lips rise on their own accord. She was radiant in every second of every day. In that moment, she was the most beautiful person there. The idea that it was him that she continuously chose to be with, day after day, only made him smile wider.

This was it for him. He found his one and only, as cliché as that sounded – he knew it for sure. Guess weddings really did make people reflect on love after all.

Ethan was very much aware of how lovestruck he must have been looking in that moment. With his eyes on Claire, he was a picture of a man in love – and he was finally ready to admit that he was. He loved her.

Almost as though she could hear his thoughts, she turned around to look at him. Their eyes met and a brilliant smile bloomed on her face. His lips moved as he mouthed the words, her smile becoming gentler.

“I’m yours.”

She mouthed it right back to him.

--

Music wasn’t as obnoxious as he anticipated it to be. That didn’t, of course, mean that he condoned every dance move he saw the guests do. He decided to not complain, though – it was a day to be happy, he wouldn’t bring anyone down with his opinion on their questionable choices of moves.

Currently, he was seated by the table, nursing his whiskey. Mirani twins, Tobias and Naveen sat beside him, all five men watching their colleagues party with wine glasses in their hands.

“How long, do you think, will it take for one of them to break a glass?” Baz asked, leaning out of his seat to see his friends better. Zaid grinned, taking a sip of his drink.

“Any second now. And my bet is on Varma.”

“Why?” Tobias’s face twisted in confusion as he turned towards him, intrigued. Zaid shrugged.

“Because she can.”

Ethan tuned their conversation out, choosing instead to look at his girlfriend. She danced with Sienna, laughing as they sang along to the song. Her dress moved with her, flowing through the air elegantly. He felt the urge to stand up and walk up to her.

“Ramsey, you do know you can just walk up to her instead of sitting here and pining for her, right?” Tobias snickered, punching Ethan’s shoulder playfully. He scoffed, leaning away with a hint of a burn in his cheeks.

“I’m not pining for her.”

“You are.” All four of his companions replied.

He was so distracted by their words that he failed to notice an approaching form. Her hand landed on his shoulder softly, the tips of her nails scratching the back of his neck. Knowing who it was, he leaned into her touch, breathing out deeply.

“Sorry, gentlemen, but I’m stealing him.” she mused happily, dragging her hand down his arm until her fingers tangled with his. Ethan let her pull her up, looping his arm around her waist.

“Stealing is bad, Herondale.” Tobias shot back, moving his eyebrows suggestively at the couple. Claire opened her mouth to speak, but Ethan beat her to the punch.

“She can’t steal something that’s already hers.” He grinned at them, then turned towards her. Claire’s jaw dropped in surprise at his boldness, her posture softening enough for him to pull her away from the table, smirking. Faintly, he heard Tobias’s words.

“Married. For sure.”

Ethan’s arms wrapped around her, fingers hooked onto her hipbones. She threw her arms around his neck, staring up at him with a soft smile. A slow song began playing and one look at where the DJ was situated told them who was behind this change. Ines grinned at them, giving them thumbs up and a cheeky wink.

“Is it just me, or is everyone trying to tell us something?” Claire giggled, nuzzling her nose against his jaw. He kissed her nose gently.

“So, you noticed it too?”

“Kinda hard not to. Girls said we’re acting like a married couple at least twice today.” she traced the lapel of his jacket, laughing quietly at the recognition in his eyes.

“Guys did it too.” Ethan muttered, tightening his hold on her. She laid her head on his shoulder.

“And how does that make you feel?”

He was silent for a long while. They swayed to the song, tuning out everything else. To her surprise, he didn’t tense up – nothing about his posture spelled out the doubts he once told her he had.

“Not as terrified as it did before.”

Claire leaned back to look at him. Their eyes met, tender understanding in them. Ethan leaned down, capturing her lips in a kiss, perfectly soft and not nearly deep enough. She clutched his lapel in her fist, creasing the fabric with how strong her pull was. His fingers dug into her back, skipping past the coarser material of her bodice and gripping the soft silk of her skirt. A voice in the back of his head told him to loosen up the hold or he’ll mark the fabric, but the overwhelming need he felt for her overshadowed everything else and he couldn’t bring himself to let her go.

The song ended and with it, their kiss. Foreheads pressed together, they caught their breath, standing in the middle of the dancefloor. Blissfully unaware of how much attention they gathered with their tender moment.

Ethan opened his eyes and finally allowed his mind to register the music again. Some sort of a fast tune that made people around them go mad. His girlfriend stared at him with an unspoken question, and he got the meaning perfectly well.

With a definite move, he dipped her onto the floor. She giggled, the sound breaking through the loud music to reach his ears. Ethan smirked, throwing her back into his arms. With his lips against her ear, he mused hotly.

“I have a few tricks up my sleeve.”

Her leg wrapped around his thigh, pushing their bodies closer. His voice broke off and his breath shuddered at the way their bodies clashed and the suggestive smirk she sent his way. His hand fell to her ass, all inhibitions gone.

“Ethan!” she exclaimed, laughing at the carefree smile he gave her. He moved his hand a bit, albeit begrudgingly.

“Can you blame me? You’re irresistible.” He muttered, kissing the shell of her ear. Claire hummed, then twirled out of his hold and back into it, jumping into his arms with her legs wrapped around his hips. Ethan groaned deeply in his throat, making her smirk.

“I have a few tricks up my sleeve too.”

Notes

This is a part 2 to the Mile High Club fic. As I said, PB could have made the chapter so good with all the wedding themes that I’d lose my wig. Writers apparently don’t know how to do basic research into fiction themes, but that’s okay (kinda). It just means I have more material to work with.

Round two smut is coming soon. 

Thank you for reading! <3

Tagging separately

[chalkrevelations]

OK, so, episode reax of WoH Ep 4 is briefly delayed – may be out Sunday, but more likely post M-W workweek. It is coming. Meanwhile, have some more Street Dance of China? S3, Ep 2.

First of all, I have to say that if I had any way of figuring out what some of this music is, I’d have a new Spotify playlist 300 songs long.

ANYWAY, we get a recap of … Wang Yibo being incredulous about coming in last place in a dance competition. Wang Yibo vowing to get back the three colorful towels he lost by coming in last place in a dance competition and therefore can’t use to send three more of his team’s dancers on to the next round. Hip-hop freestyle battles for TOWELS. Wang Yibo getting his colorful towels back. Ridiculous unnecessary drama over whether Lay Zhang is going to win his battle and get EVEN MORE colorful towels, given his competition is Wallace Chung (oh dear. that was kind of blunt.). And that’s what you missed on Glee Street Dance of China 3 Ep 1.

 Snapshots of what’s coming up this week: Everyone has shot their wad on towels and is sweating the fact that they have 59 more dancers they want to send through to the next round and a single towel left. (I TOLD YOU SO. ALL OF YOU.) The only way to get more towels is to battle for them. A hip-hop battle has NEVER BEEN SO IMPORTANT.

Cutting here, I guess, for ridiculously detailed nattering. Hashtag long post (remorseful):

Team Lay Zhang: First of all, Lay Zhang, I just have to note that you’re getting an edit that doesn’t make you look like the brightest bulb in the box. I don’t know if this is just the edit, or if it’s … well. You. I guess we’ll see as the season goes on. Also, in the interim, I have found out that you also are Zhang Yixing, which a lot of your fandom seems to actually call you, so should I call you Yixing instead of Lay? You seem to be going by Lay for this show, so it seems polite to stick to that? Anyway. Gongsun Wu Ming & Hei Zai start us off this episode, and they get off to a little bit of a slow start, but once they pick up, they’ve got a lot of nice air in their moves, that effortless(-looking) almost anti-gravity effect that good breakers can get. Then we almost immediately get a series of ok, that’s fine, oh, wait, no, THAT is actually pretty mediocre poppers, none of whom gets a towel, thank god, because the supply has to be running low. And then Teng Zai appears, claiming to be the best popper, and … OK. OK, alright. Fine. He might be right. His technique and control are fantastic, but you want to know what really sells me, in the middle of this generally fantastic performance? It’s that series of chest pops followed by the little heart held out right on the fk’n music. It’s little details like that, that make or break a performance, and he pulled it off beautifully. I went back to re-watch, it was so slick, yet so charming. OK, maybe I went back to watch more than once. You can’t prove anything. (Also, he gets called their little “Ares” - in quotes, in the subs – by other contestants, more than once, but I can’t pick out the actual sound of that name, which makes me think the subbers have inserted “Ares” as something that will give the flavor of what he’s actually being called. My 1st level Duolingo Mandarin is absolutely not enough to figure out what people are actually calling him, so is there anyone who’s able to give me some insight, here?) Aaaand, Towel Battle 1 (see Footnote 1). Post-battle, we’ve reached the point when all the captains are sweating their lack of towels, so e’rybody is just going to have to battle for towels from here on out. Yuan Ye faces Momo, and a little bit, this is where I expect the knife fight to start (Momo’s bringing the knife). I’m honestly not that impressed with either of them and probably would have saved my towel for someone else, but Lay Zhang decides to send them both through, so what’s the point of a battle to begin with? BUT THEN (dun-dun-dun) some dude calling himself Bon shows up to really cut a bitch, waves away both Yuan Ye and Momo to the sidelines, describes himself as “a boom” and proceeds to give a performance that imo is kind of mushy and all over the place. Lay Zhang looks a little taken aback as Bon sort of grinds up on him but can’t even really commit to that, just before Lin Zi Jie shows up. Lay Zhang makes Zi Jie change his coat - thank god, because you can’t see half of what he’s doing and he actually seems like the most towel-worthy performance out of this whole cluster of flail – and asks for a freestyle battle, which turns out to not be that great on Bon’s or Zi Jie’s parts, actually. I feel like the dance vocabulary here is kind of limited, and we’re left with a bunch of hip-shaking, grinding, and supposedly seductive looks, which is NOT going to cut it in the battles we’ve seen already. Towels to Momo and Zi Jie, rather than putting them in reserve and waiting to see who else shows up, which I think is probably a mistake, but OK, I’m not a pop idol with the clout to star on this show, so. (I know what I like to watch, tho’, and none of that was it.) A promise to Yuan Ye that she gets a Battle Towel. Time for Towel Battle 3 (See Footnote 3).

Team Wallace Chung: So, first off, there’s George, who dances before he’ll introduce himself, and I guess I have to respect a guy who’s going to let his performance be his introduction. And then we get a series of OK that’s fine but not really great poppers, and Wallace, unlike Lay, is handing out towels like candy. OK, my man. If that’s really what you want to do, I guess, but it doesn’t seem like the greatest idea to me. You’re also really fucking with the morale of the dancers who haven’t performed yet, who are gradually realizing that you’re going to run out of towels before you even get to them. Hilariously (for me, if not the contestants), I paused at this point to go refresh my bourbon and managed to freeze on a random contestant, identified as Wei Ming - who I don’t know if we’ll ever get to see actually perform, but he deserves the bolded name for this, alone – looking baffled and concerned, with the English subtitle on his comment reading “Sir, what are you thinking?” I suspect he is not using “Sir” in the sense that I use it when my cat (or Zhang Zhehan) has done something appallingly adorable, but rather when the cat has knocked yet another gd pen off my desk while I’m trying to take notes, just to be a bastard for attention. (OTOH, I guess if you weren’t one of the dancers bold enough to swarm up there in the first couple of hours, you take what you get. Fortuna fortes adiuvat.) We finally get to Lin Meng, whose reputation precedes him, but seriously, if Wallace is just handing out towels to every popper, what does it even mean? Wallace – Wallace – proceeds to basically call Lin Meng an old man before making him bargain for a towel, which is a shame, because Lin Meng deserves to get not only this towel but the four towels you just gave away to some guys who should still be holding Lin Meng’s jacket, Wallace. I mean, seriously, this guy’s technique is fantastic. Even if he does fumble his jacket lapel that one time. Aaaand, Towel Battle 1 (see Footnote 1). Post battle, we get A.K. Dong, who’s got some excellent musicality and a face that apparently resembles a variety show star (Hank Chen?). I mean, I guess it gets him noticed, but it sucks that it seems to overshadow his dancing, because he’s really good. Then we notice our towels are running low, and everybody is just going to have to battle it out. Wallace promises the Battle Towel to some dude who we don’t see perform and don’t get a name for, and with my prognisticatory skills, I’m going to say we won’t need to know his name, because this is the last we’ll see of him. Time for Towel Battle 3 (See Footnote 3).

Team Wang Yibo: First up, we get Bing, whose reputation precedes him, prompting other teams to look around and wonder what all the commotion is about. Bing has a motorbike moment with Yibo, before giving a performance that starts off the tiniest bit mushy before he puts some fantastic technique on display. Yibo pulls out his Perpetual Student schtick and asks for some freestyle with some motorbike elements, which at first makes me suspect you might be fucking with this guy just a little bit, Yibo, but Bing is both game and versatile, and he eventually gets his towel, along with a wish from Yibo to ride together sometime, and oh. (As we say, in A Very Significant Tone, on AO3.) All of that was flirting. OK. On the heels of Yibo giving me yet another clue as to his taste in men, we roll into a seriously uncomfortable segment that stomps all over my embarrassment squick because they’ve cut together several women to look desperate and starstruck and comical and dumb, while Yibo looks increasingly uncomfortable, and I am super not down with this, show. I’ll admit that from what we can see, none of them are great dancers, but I suspect there were a lot of not-great male dancers, too, and I just. Ick. This was unnecessary, you haven’t done it to any of the other captains, and it frankly doesn’t make Yibo look that great, when you set his reactions here against the fact that not only have we not seen approval from him for any female contestants so far, but this segment is the only interaction we’ve seen from him with any female contestants so far. Hard on the heels of this segment, we get Chick, who is very good when he wants to be but also super-extra and annoying, and who fucks around more than he really dances, but the audience seems charmed with him, and Yibo doesn’t give him any of the smackdown he deserves, which doesn’t improve my impression of the previous segment, given the varied ways Yibo iced out some of the women. Meanwhile, Jackson Wang strolls over, and Yibo acts super weird about it, for a guy who was the first one to wander into someone else’s territory, which was – oh, yeah, I remember, Jackson’s – to watch his dancers, and Jackson says that he would give Chick a towel before heading back to his own street, and then Yibo does, even though he fucks with him a little bit first, and then there’s a bit of footage cut in of Yibo making dumbass excuses for this guy, so. I’m not entirely feeling you right now, Yibo. Also, all of this is certainly doing nothing to disabuse me of the notion that you’re about 1000000x more comfortable in homosocial situations, for whatever reason. Anyway, we then get a montage of Yibo handing out some towels to various dancers (including a woman, finally, although she’s intercut with some other people and doesn’t actually get a full segment of her own), and then we get Tao and Cici, who are both good, but Yibo now discovers that he only has three towels and there are two people standing in front of him, so he gives a towel to Tao and promises one to Cici after the next towel battle, which, yeah, Tao is probably better, but this is a hell of time to decide to be circumspect with your towels, Yibo, when you can leave a woman sitting on the sidelines but send her husband through to the next round. :hands: Anyway, it’s time for Towel Battle 2 (See Footnote 2), and I do have to give Yibo props, again, for his teambuilding, because he takes a minute to say, hey, there aren’t a lot of towels left, and there are quite a few of you, so what we’re going to do is all go over there together, and get another towel, as a team. Post-battle, Yibo is still concerned about his lack of towels, and everyone left is going to have to battle it out, although, frankly, the way Yibo’s been going on about how much he likes battles, I sort of think he might secretly be a tiny bit excited about this. He ends up putting person after person into reserve, waiting to see everyone, probably, and then Meng Di shows up, and she’s already got the rest of the group behind her. They know her, they know she has cochlear implants, they respond immediately when she shushes them so she can hear Yibo and the music, they call for the DJ to turn up the music for her, they clap together to emphasize the beat. She’s smart enough to keep six feet between her and Yibo while she dances, so that she doesn’t spook him like the fragile and shy homosocial forest creature he apparently is. She immediately gets her cha cha on when her battle partner holds out his hand to lead her out for her turn. Good technique, even though there are a few bobbles. None of these four performances in the final battle are the best we’ve seen so far, but they’re solid. Yibo is clearly torn about what to do with his one towel, although the audience starts getting kind of insistent that he needs a waacker, and a female waacker at that, and he ends up making Bullet and Meng Di battle again. She’s performing for the audience at this point – I mean, she’s not even pretending about it, she spends most of this round facing them, with her back to Yibo - and she’s also versatile, genre-wise, so I think we can all see where this is going. I think he really wanted to give that towel to Bullet, who definitely is very good, but he knew that he’s painted himself into a corner where he ought to give it to Meng Di, so that he’s got some genre-versatility on the team, if nothing else. Towel to Meng Di, and a promise to Bullet to win another Battle Towel for him. Time for Towel Battle 3 (See Footnote 3).

Team Jackson Wang: First up is Bai, who apparently is a favorite from season one, but I haven’t seen season one – or season two - so I don’t have any history on any of these people. Bai is doing a bit, here, but he’s also generally got some good technique, so OK. Why are they blurring out his left wrist, though? Yang Yu Ting is really good, some more good technique, good musicality. And then we’re already on to Towel Battle 2 (See Footnote 2). Post-battle, we get Shen Kai Xiang, who apparently looks A LOT like Jack Ma, which seems to be little bit like if some Bill Gates-lookin’ mf’r showed up to audition for SYTYCD. Lyrical; good technique; much like Bai, appears to be doing a bit. And, then, as with all the captains, the dearth of towels sets in, and Jackson is going to put everyone in the gladiator ring and make them battle it out. Maybe we can win another Battle Towel. Time for Towel Battle 3 (See Footnote 3).

***

Footnote 1, AKA Towel Battle 1, Team Lay Zhang vs. Team Wallace Chung, 3v3: Team Lay Zhang is San Jin, who they throw up some B-roll on, since the show has spent no time on him so far although he seems to be in cahoots with Xiao Bao (see Ep 1 recap); Gongsun Wu Ming, who’s spoiling for a battle after no one would take him up on it during his initial performance; and Teng Zai, because I mean, come on. Team Wallace Chung is Lin Meng, which should be interesting, since he and Teng Zai are apparently from the same crew, George, and Qin Yu, who we not only haven’t seen before this, that I can remember, but don’t even get B-roll on while Wallace is talking strategy, unlike the other two. Qin Yu, this does not bode well for your future on the show, if they’re not even bothering to give you B-roll, let alone an edit. Both captains are very weird about introducing their dancers, like these guys are some big surprise and aren’t going to dance in front of everybody in a minute and half, anyway. Possibly this is some kind of attempt at a dominance display? I don’t know. It’s won by the host, anyway, who eventually enforces his will and gets some introductions out of the captains. Anyway, Gongsun is up first for Team Lay Zhang, and this dude is just fun to watch, with great musicality and flow, and Wallace’s face while watching him is a picture, let me tell you. He’s up on Qin Yu almost immediately, possibly sensing the weakest link of Team Wallace? Team Wallace counters with George, who’s not having any of that, and gets the first point for his team. Second round, Teng Zai is once again impeccable, so even though someone has lit a fire under George, who spends half his time upside down, he nevertheless loses the point to Teng Zai. Round three, Teng Zai and Lin Meng face off, and they’ve both got great technique, although I feel like Lin Meng has a slight edge there, but I also think Teng Zai did a better job of showcasing strength and control, so I’m not surprised when the judges go for another round, in which Teng Zai is still super-fun to watch and definitely on his game, but Lin Meng steps up with some incredible precision, so I’m a little surprised when the judges give it (unanimously) to Teng Zai and Team Lay Zhang. One more round, and Teng Zai … is maybe wearing down a little bit, coasting on this one, and oh, hey, we’re finally going to get to see Qin Yu, who has some nice fluidity but maybe doesn’t really match up to Teng Zai in the charisma department, which may be why we haven’t seen him before this, and also why he loses the round. Round, battle, and two towels to Team Lay Zhang, and we still haven’t seen more than 15 seconds of B-roll of San Jin. But wait! There’s still a moment to be had, in which Teng Zai suggests donating one of their towels to Team Wallace, namechecks love and peace as a vital part of street dance, and quite possibly cements his place in my – and everyone else’s - heart. Both sides go home with a towel.

Footnote 2, AKA Towel Battle 2, Team Wang Yibo vs. Team Jackson Wang, 3v3 captain-led battle: Oh, they get to choose a song for each other. This should be interesting. I feel like there’s some shit-talking going on here, although I’m not really equipped to catch it and am at the mercy of the subtitles. Does Jackson really ask Yibo, “You WERE a dancer when you were young?” because lol. And Yibo is all, “Eh, kind of?” I do love how neither of them can hold still for songs two and three. So, Team Yibo is also Bing and Tao, while Team Jackson is also Bai and Ting. The thing that strikes me immediately during the minute or so that they get to plan and quickly choreograph is that Team Yibo has everyone there – there’s no point during this planning stage that the entire crew isn’t involved. They’re all part of this. Meanwhile, Team Jackson is just the three of them, separate from everybody, working out their choreography. The whole-team approach IMMEDIATELY pays off, when Team Yibo slams out of the gate with an energy and power and fullness to their performance that Yibo will later comment is fueled by the atmosphere that the dancers at the back create, and he’s right, it’s just like a wave of pressure pushing them forward, not even getting into the fact that the three people actually in the battle are fucking good. Team Jackson is also good, but they don’t feel like a team, the crew in the back doesn’t seem to have it together, and the loss of that – it has an impact. No surprise that Round 1 goes to Team Yibo and their Attitude, which is like an entire fourth dancer on its own. Round two coming up, and the entire Team Yibo is still involved in the planning stages, Yibo’s flannel has come off and we’re down to T-shirt sleeves, and Tao is surprising me not only with his moves – I honestly didn’t expect him to come as hard as he does, given he and Cici were more lyrical in their initial performance – but in his killer instinct, because he’s the one who suggests getting up in Jackson’s face, lit. and fig., by yoinking one of his signature moves. Meanwhile, Yibo is playing gay chicken, and it is just as great an idea as it sounds like (and this is that performance that a clip of it was making the rounds a few months ago); meanwhile Jackson is going high (?) concept, and that is just as bad an idea as it sounds like, although he does attempt some charming self-deprecation when it’s all over (also, omg, one of the contestant reactions later is that he’s “short of brain trust.” I’m not actually sure what the most eloquent way to translate that comment would have been, but it certainly gets an idea across.) Chick actually earns his pay in one of the best moments of the battle that – as much as I hate to encourage it – actually does profit off his general air of douchery, Team Jackson continues to lack the kind of cohesive team feel that Team Yibo is bringing – and second round, battle, and towel to Team Yibo. THIS is the advantage of team-building from the very first minute. Also, fuck, Yibo and the dancers he’s collected are good. Technically, yes, but also, the auditions are getting kind of interminable, but after this battle, I’m excited again, and that kind of audience reaction is a good measure of whether your dancing is successful. (Towel goes to Cici, btw, which, yeah, Tao did fucking earn that for her, so I’m glad you came through on your promise to her, Yibo.)

Footnote 3, AKA Towel Battle 3, all four captains. Cypher. Four rounds. Everyone else’s face when the cypher is announced:  D:   Yibo’s face when the cypher is announced:  >:D  They each get to choose a style of music. Wallace chooses locking. Yibo and Jackson both choose hip-hop. Lay Zhang chooses krump. Yibo’s already moving before the music even starts, to whatever music lives inside his head. The music actually starts, and Yibo is in the center before anyone else gets the chance (probably before anyone else can get up their nerve …) My sound drops out right here, which, wtf, but I can still tell Yibo’s throwing down the gauntlet. He’s beatable, but not by anybody who’s going to coast. Also, goddam, he has legs for days. Lay Zhang is in next, with some good speed and power and crispness to his moves, although I’m having trouble taking that cap with the fake dreads seriously. It’s … actually super interfering with me getting on board with your vibe, my dude. Jackson’s up next, and he has somehow managed to bring my sound back, and he also lands, frankly, the best forward Salto we’ve seen from anyone so far this season, which I have to admit even though he is my inexplicable mortal enemy. Yibo and Wallace, ffs, ice him out in the follow-up, although he then does the same thing to Lay, so who tf knows what’s going on with the actual interpersonals between these guys and what’s for show, at this point. Wallace finally gets his turn and is super-game but horribly out-classed. Yibo gives him props anyway, which, good on you for respecting your elders and their efforts, I guess, baby, but let’s all admit that was an “E” for effort. Judges are frantically scribbling their points down as round 2/4 begins, and Yibo is the first one in the middle, again, and wtf gdi my sound really picks this point to drop out again? I feel like Youku may be fucking with me, at this point. ANYWAY, Yibo is finally, actually all in, and he’s got a fantastic Harlem shake, it’s like his joints are barely connected. I honestly could watch this boy dance all day, that’s how smooth he looks. Here’s the thing about Yibo, and it’s something the other captains haven’t yet achieved, or have only accomplished in slivers of time – he makes me want to dance, too. I watch him, and I want to be doing what he’s doing. You could say that he literally, not just figuratively or emotionally, moves me. And his ability to stoke that is something I really appreciate. Jackson Wang is up next and is pretty good, but I’m honestly more impressed with Lay Zhang, who manages to look almost like he’s being special-effected, that’s how staccato he gets at his best in this round. Wallace dances. The other captains are polite about it. More scribbling from the judges. Jackson’s the first one out there in round three, and he’s honestly looking the least tired of all of them. Stamina is maybe an issue, here. Even with Jackson, some of the finer control is gone. Y’all are maybe a little soft? How long has it been since any of you idols had to endure the workout of an entire concert? There’s a whole ‘nother round to go after this, so you better get your oxygen masks. Lay Zhang is still fairly crisp and pulls off a literal hat trick, although he’s doing a lot more upper body work that lets him stand in place than he is actually moving around. Jackson, with his baby boy enthusiasm and energy, is magnanimous enough to fill up some of Wallace’s time by “pulling” him into the center and then getting out there and dancing with him. I am old enough that I understand what Wallace is going through, but there’s just a noticeable difference in ability, here. Yibo is clearly waiting until last this time, to those of us paying scrupulous attention, although it’s nothing too obvious, and it does buy him enough time that he’s basically recovered by the time he gets back into the middle of the circle, although he’s a little less expansive than he’s been in the previous two rounds. So, strategic, then, too. Judges scribble as we move into the last round. No time for weakness, all of you. DID YOU HEAR ME, because most of you are looking, to be frank, just a little bit WEAK as you circle around and hang out on the edges and try to get your breath and energy back. I’m just sayin’. Lay takes the hit first, and he’s really trying, although he’s not as strong as he was back in the second round. I’m a little bit afraid he might fall over by the end of it. Yibo is sweating but pulls some random dude’s hat right off his head before … at least going all in, even if he doesn’t quite know what he’s doing, krump-wise. He ends by falling on the ground, in a credible WWX-passing-the-fuck-out imitation, which is probably a relief, by that point. Jackson probably has the most energy left, although he’s reduced to pulling off his shirt and posing by the end of his time. Wallace does some dancing. Look. I’m just going to leave it at that. Jackson is still being polite enough to encourage his elder. It’s maybe a little bit endearing. Final result is that Lay Zhang wins, which. OK. I would have placed him second, after Yibo, but I also seem to remember that he won the initial captains’ performance, back in Ep 1, so I guess I can’t be too surprised at this, based on trends. Show director was apparently so impressed, he’s gonna give up four extra towels, one to each captain, which means Lay gets two towels. So I guess towels go to Yuan Ye on Team Lay Zhang and Bullet on team Wang Yibo, if they keep their promises, although don’t know who Wallace and Jackson are planning on giving their extra towels to.

Next ep: Mystery Guest.

[kewltie]

the nerd and jock cliche, where bakugou is a frat boy on an athletic scholarship and deku is the clumsy nerd but nothing is whatt it seems because bakugou is all the professors' fav honors student) and deku is on a first name basis w/ the campus police because he keep getting arrested for various illegal actions around campus.

deku feels extremely passionate about the environment and civic duty etc and wants the world to care as much as he does!!! so he get tangled up in various issues around campus and caused all sort of problems even as he fixes them. katsuki is the v v tired bf who has to bail him out lol

ppl knows midoriya izuku before they even met him because he's famous around campus for his many colorful 'deeds' and that one time he released frogs from the biology building in protest of finding out that the school dumping their waste in the restricted woods. he's a good student but he got a rebellious streak a mile wide. rules are good only if they serve the betterment of society otherwise deku usually said fuck it which is the most hilarious thing to katsuki because izuku gets stupidly shy trying to hold katsuki’s hand but he has no problem getting right up in a bully face before getting someone punch him lol /o\.

Katsuki is the campus golden boy: stellar academic records, incredibly athletic, and tho he's blunt and prickly the school hold him high esteem because he get shit down without raising hell over unlike izuku. esp the profs because he's their star student w/o fail but he got a major flaw—his bf who all the profs dread and begrudgingly loves!!

izuku is small in size and soft in heart, but he got the soul of a harden soldier who never came back from war because he somehow always find a cause to fight for as though he cant stop fighting or he'll die. it just means he loves and cares too much for you, me, everyone, and the world!!! katsuki knows that well enough, that's why he doesnt stop izuku from doing what he does. also, because he thinks it's fucking funny to see his smol bf go up against giant foes like that sleezy sexist fuckboi in their chem class to pharmaceutical company with clenched fists. katsuki's life is just perfect growing up: good school, good friends, and annoying but supportive parents who let him have free reign so when he met izuku in their first year in college, this kid w/ the bleeding heart & bruise fist, his life got royally wrecked and he loves it.

izuku makes his life 200% more interesting with all the often weird and/or troubling things he get up to. katsuki's life was perfect but boring af until izuku steamrolled into it and fucked it up the only way he knew how—izuku may starts fight but it is katsuki who ends them. While izuku loves katsuki absolutely. he thinks katsuki is the raddest person on earth because he never hesitates, if he wants something he'll go for it w/o fail, wont even consider anything less. They actually met before this, but katsuki doesnt remember the boy he'd saved years back and now inspired.

izuku's life was a series of compromise from the ticking time bomb in his chest (literally) to the unfairness of the world because he's either too frail, too much, or too diff to ever be accepted properly but katsuki doesnt give one iota drop of fuck about it when they first met as kids. He’d moved at his pace, uncompromising and unknowingly saved izuku during one of the worst times of his life. So after finding out his savior's name, izuku cant stop looking at him and LOOKING UP TO HIM. izuku tries desperately to emulate katsuki’s no nonsense attitude just so he can have a drop of that fearless determination because he got only one life, however limited it is to save ppl, help the world, to do something and be w/ katsuki.

He’d followed katsuki to his college, reinvented himself, and finally caught the heart of the boy he'd secretly loved. he's living his life to the fullest now, no hesitation or regrets now. if he die today... he would be ok w/ it because he did everything he could. katsuki would be proud.  EXCEPT izuku fights for everyone else but not for himself and katsuki once he realized all the secrets izuku have been hiding he's gonna kill him and reminds him that he isnt a one person army and that katsuki too will go to war for him so DO NOT QUIT! DONT GO GENTLE INTO THE GOODNIGHT.

Heres the thing: izuku was born with a weak heart that he inherited from his father, so he spent most of his childhood in and out of hospital. in one long hospital stay, he met another boy. blond hair, a scowling face, and a mean mouth. he'd broke both of his legs playing a game w/ his friends. they were not the only kids of the same age in the hospital but izuku was too quiet and too shy to get along w/ the other kids and katsuki didn't want to be trap in a hospital and certainly didnt want to make any new friends so ofc izuku found katsuki interesting right away.

he was drawn to katsuki's strength and his determination because even he was wearing a cast and told that he won't be able to walk in till a couple of weeks but he WANTED TO WALK SOON AND SO PRACTICE AND PRACTICE. everytime he fell he got up again and made forced his away to be better. izuku never met such a brazen soul before so he stuck close to katsuki even though katsuki ignored him and yelled at him to go away everytime but izuku persistent eventually paid off. katsuki tolerated him by his side, insisting he can't be friend w/ someone who pussyfoot around.

"just because you're sick shouldn't stop you from doing what you want. there are more to life then the four walls of your hospital room!" it's the kind of things kids who don't fully know the consequence of his actions would say but izuku took that to heart, BE BRAVE LIKE KACCHAN he thought to himself.

They’d only known each other for a few weeks before katsuki was eventually released, but izuku never forgot that boy or his vows, "when you get better, come and find me and we'll play again!" he said it was as though izuku's doesn't have a hole in his heart. LITERALLY.  and he didn't watch his father die of the same disease!! look, izuku may be young and his mom and nurses coddle him but izuku knew ppl like him dont live long. there was an expiration date and he had been living w/ waiting for his heart to give out,,, but then katsuki came along!

now, with renewed interest in life izuku tried to get better and underwent several surgeries to aid his heart and maybe keep his alive just a little longer. he took HIM YEARS AND YEARS to finally be able to live some semblance of a normal life, but he still that same hesitant boy underneath all that bravado. when he tried to find katsuki again, katsuki had not only thrive outside the hospital but he was living his life to the fullest—excelling in class and in sports and he always surrounded w/ friends and ppl even though he put a fuss about them. all the while izuku was healthier now, stop relying on the hospital but he remained ever stagnant because while he was removed from the hospital and all that entailed, death still clung to him and he still hold reservation about himself, the world, and what it mean to live.mthe next time they meet, izuku promised that he would change for the better so katsuki would turn his way!!! because right now izuku wouldn't be able to stand equal to him and he couldn't face katsuki w/ the way he was now so when they meet again izuku would be a diff and better person

so HE WORKED SUPER HARD ON HIMSELF and his studies to get into the same college as him, pleading his mom to let him go to a school far away and that he would be v v v careful about his heart meds. izuku put his life on the line for this chance to change himself and be someone worthy. so it's not that izuku IS FEARLESS AND BRAVE, but it's that he's so terribly scare of dying that he's risking his one SINGLE life to live however he please right now because he doesn't know how much longer he has to live. he wants to do everything he could with w/e time he has left.

izuku is the way he is now because of katsuki and his fear of losing out on happiness if he never seize the chance for himself. it's,,, not a good prospective but its what keep izuku going and going even when his heart sends him back to the hospital again w/ katsuki glaring down at him.

[the-littlefangirl]

TFATWS episode 2 rewatch commentary

We should've guessed John Walker was going to be an asshole the moment it was revealed he played football in high school

That remix of star spangled man is my villain origin story JEEEEEEESUS i want to punch something

They literally mass produced a Walker action figure in two weeks what the fuck

"Your new Captain America" GAAAAAAAAAAh * angry noises *

"For those who aren't familiar with John's resume" thank you GMA lady

My face during that whole speech: wtf and indignation intensify

Bucky's face: yep same.

Imagine being Sam and everywhere you go you're seeing your one (1) mistake spit in your face overandoverandover again that's g r e a t

Tbh that sambucky reunion was anticlimatic as fuck but i actually liked that, it was like WELL HERE WE GO AGAIN they can’t look at each other for 5 seconds before they need to start bickering

"You think it didn't break my heart" SAM SWEETIE

YeAH TELL HIM SAM

The way I know this clip by heart help me. It's still hilarious but it's even better now that I know that they literally just met and they're already bickering can you PLEASE stop you children

T H E  B I G  T H R E E

Spoiler it was a thing

Love how nonchalant Joaquín is about this entire situation lmao

"You sure about that"

*Fakes smiles* yeah, * screams *

Congrats at least you didn't rip your arm off this time that's what I call progress

is he… is he wearing high wasted skinny (jeans) combat pants?

Redwing i'm sorry for what's about to happen :(

"Look at you all stealthy" PLEASE

"it's white wolf, actually" n e r d

SAM MATERIALIZING OUT OF THIN AIR SAFHAJSFHA this is the second time that happened it’s so funny

H E LLO H O W A R E Y O U?

GOOD! WHAT DID I MISS! NOTHING

They're literally 5 CHILDREN CHILDREN PLEASE STOP

AND I CAN FLY WHO GIVES A SHIT fsdjhfadjkfh

L e t  m  e   s e e

Four

Yeah

Five!

YeaH

“So they're strong. W h a t e v e r”

SFHJDASKFA we're superheroes ma'am vibes

3 supersoldiers what could possibly go wrong

REDWING MY BELOVED FAREWELL

"I always wanted to do that" *gets punched in the face* you deserved that

YEAH BABEE look at those wings

Why do the knockoff duo have a special handshake jesus fucking christ i hate them

“SAM JOHN WALKER CAPTAIN AMERICA” Sam: *Glares harder*

Sam is having a very shitty day

So are we going to ignore that Bucky did t h e  t h i n g with the shield? Ok? Ok.

You can't tell me he wasn't thinking of just grabbing it like a toy and not returning it in the middle of the fight sfj

LOOK AT THOSE W I N G S

*whispers* t h e e arm thing

*Stares at the wall* I CAN'T WITH THAT SEQUENCE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO MEJSFHJASFAH PLEASE they didn't have to go that far with the grunting noises PLEASE

John Walker getting his ass served is something that can be so personal<3

Also, I like that they've now established that he CAN lose a fight, which makes me wonder if he's also going to use his political influence as leverage against sam and bucky once he goes berserk

"It's one of the big three" "Aliens, androids or wizards" "pretty sure" lmao yeah I don't think that's the vindication Sam was looking for

"Look, I've done the work, okay" SHUT THE FUUUUUUCK UP

"You ever jump on top of a grenade" bucky finding out about it in the middle of a briefing during the war fic trope intensifies

"It's a reinforced helmet" well you're fucking losing the point there then you naive clown

Captain "Kind of the government" America??? NOPE NOPE GOODBYE N O P E NOOOOOOOOOOOPE

"Usually said by the people with the resources" daaamn

“I'm Battlestar. John's partner" A clown that’s what you are

Bucky: YES I'VE REACHED MY LIMIT STOP THE FUCKING CAR

"It'd be a whole lot easier if I had Cap's wingmen on my side" FUUUUUUUUUCK YOUUUUUUU

"It's always that last line" yeP

Erin Kellyman is??? So pretty???

"The GRC care more about the people who came back than the ones who never left" love how they keep putting those random bits since otherwise their position sounds??? Extremely reasonable?? BUT THEY ARE V I O L E N T  R E V O L U T I O N E R S fuck off

"Let's take the shield, Sam" oh you BET he's been spiraling thinking about 3224 strategies on how to steal the shield during that flight

Sharon name drop:)

YES I KNOW YOU WERE ON THE RUN FOR TWO YEARS I'D REALLY HAVE WANTED TO SEE MORE OF IT JFC @marvel i hate you so much

The whole Baltimore sequence * chef's kiss *

ELI SWEETIE

Friendly reminder that Isaiah Bradley won a fight against the Winter Soldier. Proceed.

"I'm not a killer anymore" bucky sweetie

"You think you can wake up one day and decide who you wanna be" OOOOF

Carl Lumbly's acting f u c k

"How could nobody bring him up" SAM SWEETIE

I'm going to go ballistic now excuse me:))

This whole scene is so well written jesus fucking christ

Have you praised Anthony Mackie's performance today?

Twitter is this clear enough for you?????

Tbh i'm actually surprised marvel allow them to go there even if the situation didn't escalate.

They put the tiiiiniest handcuffs on bucky lmfao

How many more "bucky"s from Walker's mouth until someone punches him?

"He's too valuable of an asset to have tied up" YEAH BEEP BEEP ALARMS GOING OFF RIGHT THE FUCK NOW UHM THOSE WERE SOME… WORD CHOICES… THAT WERE USED… fuck you Walker

"It's something I use with couples" oh coME ON

SFHAJSDFH this is ridiculous i love it

Malcolm Spellman: * agressively takes notes on Stackie's interviews *

SOUL-GAZING EXERCISE LMFAO

THEY'RE SO STUPID I HATE THEM

Sambucky: *chaotic leg positioning*

Dr Raynor: WOW ALL RIGHT

I love that the staring contest thing is the conclusion of the bucky staring joke lmao

AND DON'T SAY SOMETHING CHILDISH

this is literally not about you bucky

"Maybe this is something you or Steve will never understand. But can you accept that I did what I thought was right?" YEAH!!!! 

Why is everyone, on the show and outside of it too, acting as if Sam made that decision of out the blue and didn't think about it for six months straight, and look what happened! He got fucking played! He's feeling enough remorse as it is jfc

"Thanks Doc for making it weird I feel much better" LMFAO

Oh you KNOW that the shoulder clap is going to come back unironically and it's going to be soft as fuck

"I feel better" "I feel awful" props for the honesty boys!

"It wouldn't make sense to work with you" more like you're the fucking government's lap dog and we wouldn't touch that with a twelve feet long pole. Let's fucking go Sam let's fucking go

10/10 building of Walker actually being a fucking asSHOLE

The Power Broker name drop!

Yes Bucky SHOULD beat the SHIT out of Zemo. As a treat.

"We're going to go see Zemo" *CLASSICAL MUSIC STARTS BLASTING IN THE BACKGROUND*

Oh I love that last bird eye's shot at the end of the scene

Overall thoughts: This episode was MUCH MUCH better on second viewing. I do think it’s a little bit too fast paced so a lot of things keep happening and there’s not enough time to process them in between?? Again the best moments are the quiet ones like the flight back and the Baltimore scene, but mad props to everyone from jumping between comedy and drama so fucking well. Even though there are, in tone, some very opposite atmospheres in the episode it never feels chaotic, and the situations that happen are very well connected and don’t feel disjointed at all.

The highlight of the episode was definitely the two different ways Sam and Bucky are (avoiding) grieving over Steve, and how his legacy hangs between them at all times. It makes so much sense for Bucky to take the entire situation so personally because Steve was the One thing he knew he could trust, while Sam is trying to see the bigger picture and not just what Steve demanded of him.

Hope that makes sense!

[unholy-merchant]

NSFW Alphabet:

Strife

Sorry, this took so long! It is currently finals week and I'm just trying to survive. @theimgonnapregal for helping me come up with a few of these! Anyways, Enjoy!

A = Aftercare (What are they like after)

He’s relatively lighthearted after sex and will definitely try to make you laugh as you both come down from your highs. To him laughing is the purest form of intimacy. Aside from the usual tending to his partner, He’ll make sure to clean you off and run a hot bath for you both. Strife will make you feel divine. He whispers praise into your ear as he holds you close to him, stroking your forearm lightly, kissing all your sore spots.

B = Body Part (Their Favorite body part of theirs and their partners)

We all know Strife is an ass man. But no seriously this man cannot resist your ass. Especially when it's bouncing on his cock. He tends to grab it often whether it be in public or in private. Loves the little noises you make when he pinches it and your blushing face after. He likes how it molds perfectly into his hands. Just like your ass, he loves his hands. With them he can make you crumble before him, begging him for more and he adores it.

C = Cum (Anything to do with their seed)

Hot, Long, and sticky strands. You know he’s close when he gets quiet, growling seductively into your ear. He likes to cum onto your back or into your mouth. Getting an amazing view of his hot substance dripping down either your chin or ass. As for the amount? Oh, honey. I wouldn't say it a lot but if your sucking him don't expect to swallow it all.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty Self Explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Wouldn’t mind if he fucked you while you wore his helmet. Or if you sucked him off while he sat on Samaels throne. He thinks it would be hilarious to defile Samaels throne more than it already is. But at the same time, he would never want to put you in danger nor take you to hell. Plus he knows the Red bastard (Not War) is on there 24/7.

E = Experience (How experienced are they?)

Strife has a good amount of experience. Especially since he's the most “human” of the four. He knows enough to tease you before giving you what you want. Knows what you want and will definitely give it to you. He’s very in tune with his partner's desires. He definitely is the second biggest tease out of his siblings. We all know whose the first ;)

F = Favorite Position (What position they like to see ya in)

As I said before he's an ass man so therefore would want a perfect view of your ass. Doggy style is his go-to, especially for the rougher sessions. He's also partial to reverse cowgirl or regular cowgirl.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment or are they more humorous?)

Ok, we all know he likes to make a lot of jokes but when it comes to making love, he's a bit more serious only cracking a few jokes here and there jokes if you're nervous. He wants to ease the tension. Wants to make sure you're comfortable. He seems like the type to put an emphasize on fun during sex but not to the point where it's obnoxious.

H = Hair (How well-groomed are they? Does the Carpet match the drapes?)

The carpets indeed match his drapes. Surprisingly well-groomed. He makes sure to groom himself from time to time. Even with his schedule. He wouldn't want you to struggle with an unmanageable jungle. No one wants that it's gross.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect)

I think Strife can be very romantic when he wants to be, in his own way. He strikes me as someone who's more in touch with the tender side of human emotions so he wouldn't have trouble with romantic gestures or sweet words towards you. Like, he's not super sappy but there's a more open truth about his adoration for you. Expect lingering touches on your body.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation Headcanon)

He’ll only do it when the mood strikes him other than that he won't do it often. But when the mood does strike he goes to town. His mind is dirty, let's be honest. He's probably thinking of you doing something really kinky or sexy. Will be a panting mess. Moaning your name into his sheets or quietly into his scarf as he pumps himself.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Strife definitely has a helmet kink and you cannot change my mind. Will fuck you in a heartbeat if he came home and saw you lying seductively with his helmet on.

L = Location (Favorite place to do they do)

Aside from your shared bedroom, I think the shower would be his favorite place to have sex. Pressed tightly together in a small space. Hot water running down your bodies as he pushes you closer to him. Mouths kissing each other in roaring heat. It's Steamy and he loves it.

M = Motivation (What gets them going?)

When his Love uses a gun just like he taught you too. He just can't help how beautiful you look while wielding a gun. That and the hot glances you give him, the ones full of pure love and adoration. The ones that make him feel human.

N = NO (Something they wouldn't do/turn-offs)

WILL NOT for the love of the Creator hurt you. Never accidentally or intentionally. So please never suggest something that will put you in harm's way. He doesn't find it sexy or appealing when someone belittles him either. He doesn't mind dirty talk but do insult him.

O = Oral (Preferences in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Most likely will give rather than receive. He wants to watch you crumble under his tongue. Begging as he takes long soft strokes against your core. Lapping at your sweet honey. Receiving is a whole other thing. Pulls slightly at your hair when you suck him off. Your tongue curling around his length as you take him in. Lips soft and gentle around his cock. It's one of his fave things to watch.

P = Pace (Fast and Rough or Slow and Sensual?)

Strife would base his pace on his partner's preferences/strengths. Especially if your human. Slow and Sensual is his default. He wants to savor the moment. Wants to hold you close to him. Feel everything you have to offer to him. He loves you, you're his entire world and he just wants to bask in your love. The only time he will be rough with you is if you ask. Other than that expect some sweet and gentle loving.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies than then proper sex, how often?)

He's a very busy man so Quickies are always great for him. Course he always prefers taking his time. It's just really convenient for him. Especially when he has to go on a mission and the both of you need to release some stress. Quickies happen more than proper sex because of his schedule. But when he does have the time he’ll make sure to love you fully.

R = Risk (Are the game to experiment? Do they take risks?)

Absolutely! The risk of getting caught is something he thrives off of. It's exhilarating to him. If you're down to experiment then so is he. And it's more than just locations that he wants to experiment with. It's also positions. See what sticks and what doesn't.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long can they last?)

Well, I believe he can go for a really long time. He's a Nephilim after all, so he can go for longer than the average sexual partner. He can go as long as you want. But remember this man and only go so far, he needs breaks too.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them on their partners or themselves?)

With him having such a familiarity around humans, he knows about a lot of sex toys. Will use them on you often, just to hear you beg and moan before going in himself.

U = Unfair (How much they like to tease?)

If I didn't say before in saying it again. Second. Biggest. TEASE. He’ll trace his fingers up your thigh. Leaves a trail of kisses from your chest to your abdomen. Will thumb your inner thigh for a bit before moving lower to your core. He knows what he's doing and will have you begging.

V = Volume (How loud are they, what sounds do they make?)

His volume is not what'd you'd expect it to be. Strife makes soft groans and breathless chuckles as he makes love. Rougher sessions are when he tends to be a bit more vocal. Moaning your name over and over as he reaches his high.

W = Wildcard (Get a random headcanon)

You once made him a necklace from one of the bullets from his gun. It has a small engraving of his name on it. You gifted it to him as a small thank you for saving your life. So whenever he misses you he pulls out the necklace from beneath his scarf. I couldn't think of a good Nsfw headcanon.

X = X-Ray (Let's see what's in those pants!)

Strife is confident in his abilities so you best believe he's also confident in this area too. His length is 6 and a half.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

I see him as someone with a moderate sex drive. Not too low nor very high. It's manageable. He's usually busy preserving Balance and I guess that's affected his sex life a little bit.

Z = Zzz (How quickly they fall asleep afterward?)

He'll fall asleep right after you've fallen asleep. right after he's made sure that you're ok and that you've been well taken care of. Strife is very soft with you, his heartbeat lulling you into a peaceful sleep. Will listen as your breathing slows down and when it does he knows your asleep. Holds you tightly to his chest, savoring you being in his arms for a bit before falling asleep on his own.

[ishgard]

i. Right Behind You

It was to have been a simple enough mission. A quick in-and-out of the Castrum as it were; swiping some rumored intel concerning the empires latest project, and gone before the soldiers knew any better.

Ahru, however, knew better than to assume the simplest outcome of any mission. She did so love to hear the nagging sound of her own internal voice ringing ‘I told you so~’ after all.

The Warrior of Light had seen a lot of things in her travels, abominations of magic and science alike, so to say she’d seen nothing quite like this wasn’t correct. No, she could make a number of comparisons; the androids she’d seen on the First, for one, came to mind. It seemed to have a similar level of intellect and fortitude at least, and certainly the thrice-damned weight. The blows that came from the bloody thing hit like a landslide.

It towered at least four times over the tallest roegadyn she’d ever met, and thus resembled a humanoid form. However while clad in armor not so unlike those legatuses wore, it was clear there was no man or woman of flesh and blood beneath. Every blow or shot that struck true put chinks in that armor, showing writhing black flesh beneath. The first comparison her busy mind leapt to was of Omega’s quicksilver-liquids, not a perfect comparison perhaps, but she nevertheless didn’t particularly think it boded well.

Nor had it, as every wound sealed up quickly, not at all slowing the creature down. Instead it occasionally gave a moment's pause, as if re-evaluating - or perhaps as if the thing were not quite complete enough to process all that was happening around it.

Plumes of white breath broke the cold air. They weren’t getting anywhere fighting it, and at this rate they were just as likely to draw all sorts of unwanted attention from the castrum. She was sure from the subtle shift of weight not ten ilms to her side that the Shadowhunter was reaching the same conclusion. The creature tilted its devil-helmed head at them - was it curious? Was it reading their motives from their stances? Either way, it mattered little.

Unspoken, the decision was made; Gaius tossed a small flash grenade she’d seen him swipe from the castrum earlier, and she likewise fired off a bright blast of white magic as they each in unison turned and ran.

“The bridge.” She heard him call out, and nodded to him as he glanced behind them to fire two shots. She didn’t see, but rather heard them strike their armored mark, and a faint mechanical whirring that she hoped was something failing the creature, however temporarily.

The bridge wasn’t far at all, but they wasted no effort in getting there all the quicker. A chasm some hundred or so yalms wide connected only by what barely passed for being better than a simple rope bridge. No two people -save perhaps two lalafell, or small au ra lasses- could hope to cross it shoulder-to-shoulder, and while it seemed to be reinforced with some Garlean materials or such, she had no reservations about whether or not it would hold the weight of that infernal thing.

With any luck, it’d instead be sent plummeting to the rapids and crags far below. Though, Lady Luck had rarely held her in very high regard, and the feeling by now was quite mutual.

She saw Gaius return the Heirsbane to its place on his back, leaning into a dead sprint as his feet reached the bridge. Hearing the sound of heavy metal feet pounding the earth behind her -already too close for comfort- she did the same.

It was an unconscious thing for her to do these days, adjusting her pace even at a time such as this to fall behind just so. To remain the thing between her allies and whatever pursued them. Funny, perhaps in retrospect, it seemed to apply to any would-be ally, even the Shadowhunter.

Her mind was on the bridge though, it’s structure, however reinforced, still stirring underfoot and in the howling winds that tore through the canyon. She moved with it, careful not to overextend herself, when came the sound of the metal monstrosity crashing into the ground at the end of the bridge from where they’d come.

It must have leapt, she thought, to cover ground. From the explosive sound of it, the shockwave of it’s landing broke the very earth, and the whole of the bridge leapt up beneath her like a great wave. Halting on the spot she grasped the hand rails and spread her feet out to anchor herself. There was no need to look back, even now she could feel everything beginning to turn and list wildly - she fled forward once more, aiming for Gaius’s back where he was pulling himself to safety on the far ledge.

Behind her the bridge violently turned one way, then the other - giving her some muddled idea of it’s slow, seemingly seismic footfalls. Then the weight shifted differently, and she had the dread feeling it was realizing it’s error. There was a high, metallic screeching of the bridge supports giving way, echoing across the canyon, and a rapid clicking sound that must have come from the creature.

“Ahru!”

She leapt - and the bridge went out from beneath her.

Gaius’s hand thrust out, grabbing her by the forearm even as she felt the creatures clawed gauntlets hiss mere ilms from the back of her head - close enough to send frigid chills down her spine. She wasted not a moment reaching her hand up to grab the gunblade from Gaius’s back, holding his arm firm with her feet planted against the side of the ravine as she arched her body around.

The creature had grappled into the rock not a dozen fulms below her, parts whirring and hissing as its armor had come apart around its hands and feet revealing anchoring claws. It’s joints shifted into something less like a man and more like some quadruped, a whip-like cable of a tail lashing behind it - the end of it glowed, nearly distracting her...

The crevice of it’s helm, right where a Garlean third eye would be. There was not, however, and the armor was altered accordingly - a subtle fault. She fired once, then a second time. A light burst from its tail just as she felt herself pulled up and about like a ragdoll. The beam of energy sizzled and stank like something putrid and burning as it whurred past her face.

Stood on the ledge, panting, her fingers were still pressed into the Shadowhunters forearm, his in hers. Her last glimpse had been the creatures head snapping back with the impact of her shots, its claws grasping for purchase and skittering down, down…

“Not bad,” Gaius muttered, releasing his hold. She gave a heavy exhale and did the same, offering him a wry grin as she handed the gunblade back to him.

“Good thing I’ve picked up a thing or two about handling a gunblade.” Through both actual lessons and... being on the opposing end.

“Move,” he grunted, already turned and putting one foot before the other himself. Mirthless as usual, but correct - also, she begrudgingly acknowledged, as usual. Hoping the fall would slow that thing down would have been a fools mistake, and she was quick to follow him.

// So I wrote this shortly before the LL and new Weapon series was revealed and had a pretty good laugh, even though it’s very different from what we’re actually getting - the original doc was even just called W E A P O N. Mostly I just wanted to limber up on some less-soft/fluffy things and more of the action/working together stuff between them. There’s more, but will I get to it? Who knows. But I’m posting it anyway.

Amusingly was digging around for a proper title for it and tripped over a GBF event that hilariously felt very reminiscent actually. The image on the video I linked to in the title definitely isn’t what I was imagining but honestly? If you’ve played GBF there’s probably some similarities in it’s nature. :|a

[land-of-brains-and-chocolate]

god it WILL NOT stop bothering me until i talk about it. the way we got here. it’s not just about the book anymore, not at all, and it’s certainly never been about “shipping”, at this point it’s how helpless the tactics of the guy make me feel.

step one: refer to people who have read previous venom books and noticed the trend throughout the nineties to portray eddie and the symbiote as a man and an agender alien in an ambiguously or not-so-ambiguously romantic relationship, which was picked up on and completely unambiguously canonised in the very last run, consistently refer to these people as “shippers”, lovingly condescend to them, do not ever treat “the ship” as existing beyond their imagination

[I LOVE THAT YOU GUYS EXIST]

result: make people forget that this is a complete misrepresentation and he has received no criticism whatsoever for “not making a ship canon” because that is not what he did, he decanonised it and then denied doing so and painted everyone it ever meant something to as essentially deluded - and, considering that that’s all they are, he’s being awfully kind and accommodating, isn’t he?

evaluation: a reason to harass him? no! really kind of manipulative? yes!

step two: actively seek out these no-good shippers on tumblr! tell them that you’re watching them! read their detailed posts in which they express their grievances about your comic book to their friends and misrepresent their points on your twitter so your bajillion followers can affirm that Those People are categorically wrong about everything!

[EDDIE IS CODEPENDENT]

people are mad at him because he said eddie was codependent! not because he’s reframing the extremely rare story of a troubled queer relationship that was ultimately still a redemptive force in these characters’ lives as an unhealthy compulsion that corrupts, hm, what a fresh and unfamiliar take, no reason why this would strike a nerve - and, recently, of course, as something inherently abusive, every bit of hope and change for the better vile and fake.

literally just start vaguing about people’s personal tumblr blogs on your professional twitter account with the little, little blue checkmark and everything, use that to make passive-aggressive references to people’s posts! why not!

[LOVE EACH OTHER]

people talk about how they like a symbiote and its host getting along (and they did, that very night, talk quite a lot about ngozi)? that is so dumb and lame.

[EVERYTHING IS AWESOME]

people get sick of edgy shock factor writing that throws one dark theme after another at them without treating any of them with the consideration they deserve? people expect some moments of levity in a venom book?

they’re asking for stories with no conflict where nothing bad ever happens! but it’s okay, he knows better, he knows you just don’t know what you want! it’s not like endless sadness is just as likely to be dreadfully boring or unintentionally hilarious as endless happiness!

result: o w n e d god he sure is shutting down every point no one has ever made

evaluation: a reason to harass him? no! really kind of manipulative? yes!

step three: literally get so mad at people on tumblr talking about your comic that you not only boil their opinions down to THE SHIIIIP but literally say that their opinions don’t matter because they literally would never say it “to your face” literally because it’s “easy to be brave on tumblr”

literally

say these words

[IT’S EASY TO BE BRAVE ON TUMBLR]

call people chicken shits for NOT talking to you directly! and then! BLOCK everybody who talks to you directly! or quote retweet them so your followers can descend like vultures! actually acknowledge that it takes bravery to interact with you if you’re in the Tumblr Demographic, you know, one of Those People, and frame yourself as in the right for it???

am i losing my mind???

[SIX PEOPLE ON TUMBLR]

get so mad at people on tumblr talking about your comic that you not only claim they’re the only people ever to talk badly of it but imply that you’re one step away from namedropping the specific perpetrators. that’s not ominous at all!

it’s an age-old question: how many times does one of marvel’s top writers with legions of fans have to imply his antagonistic awareness of your specific existence before you’re on a first name basis? and also paranoid?

result: stir shit. be a shit stirrer. faint when your shit stirring does in fact stir shit. you can’t go “you would never” and be surprised when people do, you... can’t...

evaluation: a reason to harass him? no! really kind of manipulative? yes!

step four: whip out your ally card... to whip the people you’re supposed to be allied to with it. try to use your knowledge of queer issues to shut down actual queer people.

[I DON’T THINK IT’S APPROPRIATE TO ASSUME GENDER]

either that, or straight-up make a “did you just assume my gender” joke. i can’t find the original tweet anymore, so it’s possible it was that and he deleted it because it was too blatant, lol.

result: MAYBE YOU GUYS WERE THE PROBLEMATIC ONES ALL ALONG

evaluation: a reason to harass him? no! really kind of manipulative? yes!

step five: remember that interview where he outright stated that he just wants to, just to be the definite venom run? just to put the biggest dent in canon he can? just to break everybody’s toys and emerge victorious as the one person with the valid take on venom?

yeah, those things become more noticeable in the actual book, over time, and acceptance of that is, uh, not universal? not everybody’s up for him spending several issues in a row on e s t a b l i s h i n g  d o m i n a n c e by having eddie sit around as other characters tell him that a ton of stuff other writers from michelinie to thompson to costa to kaminski to slott to jenkins have done actually sucked and was wrong and fake and never happened? through retcons that make no sense, like, factually don’t fit?

people don’t like you walking back character and relationship development to further your end goal of recasting the symbiote as the personification of addiction and abuse instead of itself a survivor of extreme abuse who has been constantly denied personhood in a way that is frighteningly resonant and who has been going through a genuine redemption arc for years now?

people don’t like you acting like eddie never had a reason for being who he is before and you had to make one up? one that doesn’t fit the character at all, which you didn’t realise because you apparently thought the character had no characterisation before you came along?

you can imagine how these things might spark nerd rage?

and you can probably imagine who this nerd rage was blamed on, yeah?

these criticisms inherently require knowledge of venom canon, because they’re largely about disrespect for it, these criticisms are not related to shipping of any kind - but of course the only thing people could possibly be mad about is the "ship", the only ones making a fuss are those “shippers”, those casuals, Those People who only care about One Thing and don’t understand the real gritty reality of the, god you get it i’m making fun

[I KNOW WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT]

you’re the only one, don. it’s true.

and i know, i know for a fact, that he’s been aware of criticism from other groups all along, that he was, for example, witness to this livestream that spends like a solid hour a month mercilessly dragging him through the dirt, and you know what the extent of his response was?

thanks for checking the book out.

that’s it. that’s all. this guy hasn’t gotten any less loud about criticising him, either. wishing for his book’s cancellation and retconning. but nothing more. he gets to keep to himself. he is #valid.

people have been taking the piss out of him on youtube, on reddit. only tumblr ever earned his ire. only tumblr gets namedropped at convention panels.

and now, now more than ever? you better believe your regular run-of-the-mill nerds, straight, male, utterly uninterested in the icky stuff, everything, are mad. almost everyone who’s truly tits deep in venom lore is mad.

and so he’s said he’s received threats. and i’m sure he has. i’ve received threats. you’ve received threats. it’s never okay. it sure as shit never helps to send them.

he’s gotten a lot of fucking inappropriate personal vitriol! lots of it actually “ship”-related! i’m categorically against contacting the guy for any reason!

but who is to blame? who do people accept as being to blame? who do news outlets report on as being to blame? when, i presume, not every single one of them actually went “i’m doing this specifically because i’m a (thunder clap) shipper”? when large-scale retcons are literally always met with nerd rage? when a shipper-less fandom probably still would’ve had threats?

[THIS IS INSANE]

[IT’S THE SHIPPERS]

result: if all criticism = “shippers”, and “shippers” = harassment, then everyone who has no actual idea of what’s going on but who doesn’t like “shippers” is automatically on his side and nobody who isn’t a “shipper” wants to risk the association by criticising him.

get this stuff out to his followers, to news outlets, to people completely uninvolved and contextless, and watch the bile run over everywhere because lots of people are ready to accept this narrative in comic book spaces.

have people in the replies and comments eagerly discussing how this is more proof that c+o+m+i+c+s+gate was right and they’re the only reasonable ones. how disgusting and crazy "shippers” are. how donny should keep doing his best to trigger the gays. there’s no pushback against these ideas.

and i’m so fucking stuck between wanting to defend the man, wring my hands and apologise on behalf of the other These People, because i don’t see anything justifiable in their actions, and in being... just... just so frustrated... with everything... with throwing everyone out to the dogs... and claiming that he doesn’t mean to... when he has this whole history of belittling "shippers” specifically... of making sure their public image is that of people who just don’t know what they’re talking about and are in no way worth empathising with... of only drawing attention to the aggressive ones and blocking the reasonable ones

when he literally only stands to benefit from doing all this. 

this is massive amounts of free positive pr.

this makes him essentially immune to criticism of any kind.

evaluation: a reason to harass him? no! really kind of manipulative? yes! 

i forgot! somewhere along the line, he did do something very good and disavowed association with co/mics/ga/te!

[C0M1C5G8]

why the fuck am i censoring? tumblr search stopped working decades ago.

anyway, it should come as no particular surprise why these people assumed he would side with them. not that any high profile writer who values his standing would, really. are there any? maybe there are, i’m not up to date on this drama.

i just think it’s funny - genuinely not his fault, but hilarious - that this was apparently enough to inspire a “boycott”? and it was a fart in the wind?

which is the least surprising thing ever because there is actually nothing whatsoever to hold these people’s ire to be found in venom? excluding aliens, there has been one real and present character who isn’t a white guy in 11 issues? it is actively less queer than it was before? donny has never caved to the essjaywoo pressure in any way, shape or form? what were they... thinking? it’s almost like these people are dumb?

all they've done is ensure that, without it actually doing anything, venom gets the commendation for being A Comic The Gators Don't Like?

anyway.

what do we do moving forward? i don’t know. nothing. not harassing anyone. keep being salty on tumblr. do not engage him. i think i’m more about stalling the chain reaction he’s caused than the man himself. if you’re not a “shipper”, of course, keep posting your criticism, maybe stand up for “shippers” who are being dogpiled over genuine criticism, don’t let people say This Is All Proof Of How You Can’t Have Queer Content Because Queers Are Crazy.

and be nice to mike costa.

[smoaking-greenarrow]

“You’re n-not ,um, w-wearing anything under that, are you..?”

For @swordandarrow :)

Rated E.

Read on AO3.

“I want to go home.”

“Felicity,” Oliver said slowly, familiar with these conversations after four years of marriage. “The party just started an hour ago. We planned the whole thing. It would be incredibly rude to go home now.”

“What if EJ needs us?”

“Roy will call.” 

He tried not to smile as his wife pouted. “I still can’t believe you convinced me that Roy is going to take good care of our son.”

“Come on, let’s get you a drink.”

“Bad idea. My mom spiked the eggnog already.”

Oliver pursed his lips, “let’s get some champagne, then. I think it’s better if we both avoid your mother’s concoctions for tonight.”

Felicity took his hand as he offered it, letting him lead her to a waiter with a tray of champagne flutes. But she still groaned. She felt like the grumpy old lady who was out past her bedtime. God, it was awful. But Eli was going through a ‘scared of the dark’ phase which meant a lot of crying and plenty of tiny feet jabbed into her ribs whenever he scampered into their bed.

It was impossible not to worry about how Roy was handling it. Especially since it was EJ’s bedtime. She finished her champagne quickly, feigning interest in the conversation with Oliver’s staff and their spouses. 

Her husband raised an eyebrow at her as she knocked back her drink a bit too quickly and set her glass on one of the trays. He knew that she was rushing. “I’m just going to give Roy a call,” she whispered, vigilant not to interrupt the small talk. “I should check in. Eli’s not used to being away from us, and I know he loves Roy, but-”

Sighing, Oliver put a gentle hand on her hip, leaning down to her ear, “I’m giving you five minutes. And then I expect you right back here.”

His voice was low, an order. 

Usually it pissed her off when he tried to tell her what to do. But Oliver practically growled in her ear, and his voice wasn’t annoyed. It held an exciting tone. A slightly dark and thrilling challenge. “Or what?” She breathed back.

Oliver slowly brought his lips to the corner of her mouth, kissing her there once before he answered. “Or I’ll have to remind you how rough I can be.”

To say that their sex life was boring would be a hilarious lie. But it had been....less sexy lately. The impulse, the need to tear each other’s clothes off, the uncontrollable noises that ripped through her chest when Oliver was between her legs had been traded in for hurried moments, rushed sex on a time crunch between their busy schedules. Not that there wasn’t something hot about getting him off in their laundry room before work last week, but she missed when they didn’t have places to be or kids to not traumatize.

It also didn’t help that a toddler found his way between them most nights. Sleeping naked was a thing of the past.

“Don’t threaten me with a good time, Oliver Queen,” she whispered back, her lips brushing his cheek. “You’re the Mayor...don’t get yourself in over your head here.” She kissed his cheek, her fingers gripping his arm. Oliver’s eyes narrow as she pulled back, and she gave him a slow smile. 

Felicity didn’t give him the chance to respond, instead she turned on her heel and headed for his office. She had no intentions of making it a quick phone call. 

Roy told her that EJ had eaten all of his dinner and fallen asleep in a fort they’d built in the living room. Apparently her son was still snoring away in there. She smiled, thanking Roy for making it easy on them. “Of course,” he replied. “Any time.”

“Did William make it home by curfew?”

“Yep,” Roy answered. “Not a minute late.”

Felicity smiled, “of course he did. I’m still waiting for his rebellious phase, but I’m not sure we’ll ever see one.”

“Well, he did think that purposely washing his whites with his colors was badass.”

She laughed, “that poor kid. I had to pretend to be mad about that. He doesn’t realize that doing his own laundry at all negates the whole badass thing.”

Roy laughed too, “so, how’s the party?”

“Boring. But my mother is having a blast. She loves meeting all of these divorced businessmen.” Felicity rolled her eyes. 

“Did she do what I think she did?”

“Oh, obviously. Although for once I think it’s doing more good than harm. These stuffy business types can use a little Mama Smoak Eggnog to lighten them up.”

“Ah,” Roy let out a deep breath, “isn’t it weird?”

“What?”

“You, Oliver, and Thea at a holiday party because he’s Mayor again and Thea’s his District Attorney. Your mom moving to town to be closer to you and your family. Me sitting here on a Saturday night babysitting? I mean, did you ever think, four years ago when you married him...that this is what we’d be doing?”

Felicity’s mouth pulled up into a smile. “Yeah...” she whispered, “this is exactly what I hoped we’d be doing.”

She heard the door open behind her, and Oliver slowly came in, shutting the door and shoving his hands in his pockets. His face was blank, his eyes on her as he waited for her to hang up. “Roy,” she said lowly, “I gotta go. We’ll be home in a couple hours.”

Oliver stalked towards her, “you’re stubborn,”

“I know.” Felicity put her phone down and started to push away from the desk, but Oliver pressed his palm to her stomach to stop her. He pushed her back until her ass met the edge of the desk again. Then his hands trailed to her legs and he eased her up on to it. She gasped when he shoved her legs apart a moment later. 

His office was tucked away from the party and the lights were off. She could still see the crowd, mostly drunk, from the windows. But none of them were paying attention to them. It sent a thrill down her spine to feel his hands on her, roaming over her body...while she could also see a group of people not too far away, appreciating her Hanukkah decorations. “Oliver...”

He pressed himself between her legs, rolling his hips. Grabbing her knees and hauling her to the edge of his desk, Oliver hooked her legs around his waist. Then he leaned her back, spreading her legs and tilting her head up so he could kiss her.

“You have guests,” she whispered into his mouth.

His reply was a low growl, a dismissal, before he pulled her bottom lip between his teeth. He bit down, making her wince and her heart race at the same time. His tongue soothed the spot as he released her lip. “You didn’t come back.”

Felicity smirked. “You didn’t expect me to.”

Oliver’s hands tightened on her waist, and he caught her chin between his fingers, meeting her eyes as he stared down his nose at her. “Did you want me to be rough with you, Felicity?”

She nodded, her hips moving into his on their own accord. “God, yes,” she groaned. He caught her hair between his fingers, gripping it to tilt her head back and sufficiently messing up the intricate bun she’d placed. But when he gave himself access to her neck, taking control and scraping his teeth along her skin, kissing and licking a path to her collarbone, she did not have a single care about how her hair might look after this.

It’d been over a week since they’d had any time alone aside from the few hours of sleep each night before EJ woke up and wanted to snuggle his way into their bed. Oliver moved his hands over her body slowly, his mouth moving at the same pace as he left marks all over her neck. He took his time, building her up and giving his attention to the curves of her body.

“Oliver,” Felicity sighed, slipping her hand between them. She grazed her fingers along his covered cock, feeling how hard he was. He was practically throbbing through his pants, making her arousal sky rocket. “Yes,” she groaned, reaching for his zipper.

His hand stopped hers, a gravelly noise of protest coming from his chest. She opened her eyes to meet his gaze, ready to pout. He shook his head, moving her hand up his chest. He guided her arm around his neck, giving her something to hold on to before he yanked her across the desk, her core colliding roughly with his cock. Felicity yelped, probably too loudly, but he didn’t flinch.

Her husband’s eyes darkened at the sound, and he thrusted into her, his erection slipping between her folds. She was wet. And his eyes slammed shut as it soaked onto his pants. 

Suddenly, the cool, confident, controlling man was gone. Oliver inhaled sharply, a curse falling from his lips as she rotated her hips, grinding against him until she felt his cock rubbing against her clit. She moaned, finding the adorable way he lost his breath just as attractive as the guy who promised to be rough. “You’re n-not ,um, w-wearing anything under that, are you..?”

Felicity raised an eyebrow, shaking her head. 

“Y-you, um, you haven’t been wearing underwear all night?”

She grinned, shaking her head again.

“And...were you,” his mouth dropped as she pleasured herself on him, “were you planning on sharing that information with me at some point? Or was I just never going to find out that my wife not only wore the sexiest fucking dress she could find...but that she didn’t bother to wear anything else.”

Felicity didn’t mind admitting that she’d been hoping for something just like this to happen. She’d had a pair of panties in hand earlier that afternoon, planning on putting them on after her shower. But on a whim, she chose to drop them back into her drawer. But she didn’t tell him that. “Should I be telling you every time I’m not wearing underwear, Oliver?”

His pupils grew wide, his eyes finding hers and he nodded. “Damn. Yes, please. I mean, any time. Every time. I would...” he shivered, “really like to know.”

She laughed, crinkling her nose up at him. “Well...what if I don’t?”

Oliver watched her for a moment, understanding where she was going. He licked his lips, pulling his hips back, away from hers, and making her whimper. She couldn’t help but grin as he slipped back into that sexy, assertive control. “Felicity, I know every inch of your body.” He slid his finger down her arm, making her shiver. “I know how to make you tremble under my touch. I know where to kiss you to make you moan...” Oliver dipped his head to her ear, sucking on the spot just below her lobe. The moan that followed was involuntary, and proved his point.

When he pulled back to look down at her, he was smiling. “I know exactly how hard to fuck you if I want to hear you screaming my name. And I know exactly how slow to take it if I want to feel your legs shake...my face pressed between your thighs while I taste you.”

Felicity’s heart pounded in her chest, her hips thrusting wildly, seeking friction, needing the pleasure he described. “So, what...” she asked breathlessly, “you’ll tease me if I don’t share my underwear habits?”

Oliver shook his head, tucking her hair behind her ear. His eyes glanced over her face, appreciating the desire he found there. The effect he had.

“No, honey. You’re way too fucking gorgeous when you come.” Oliver whispered, “I would never want to mess with that.” He smirked, “and I wouldn’t deny myself the pleasure of enjoying that view.

“I’m just saying...” He thrust his hips up into hers, making her eyes roll back and surely causing a stain on his slacks by now. “Knowing that you’re not wearing underwear...is really fucking hot.” Oliver bent down to whisper in her ear, “and I don’t mind showing you how much I love it.”

“Then show me,” she groaned back.

[babybirdgyeom]

Got7 Dating A-Z ⇴ Bambam

Mark Version | Jaebum Version | Jackson Version | Jinyoung Version | Yugyeom Version

A ⇴ AFFECTION

big fan of it. i feel like he’s not only a fan of giving but he loves whenever you show him your affection in any kind of way. doesn’t matter if you come to him and kiss his face or if you just tell him how good his new hair looks. he just loved getting your affection as much and as often as possible and would get really whiny when you wouldn’t say something about how good he looks today.

he’d also give loads of affection but more with words. 

B ⇴ BEFORE DATING

you and bambam have literally been so close it sometimes felt like you already were dating. even though you weren’t really flirting as much you still were always together, laughing and talking about anything. when you met him it immediately clicked and you’ve been close ever since. but you never were quite sure about your actual feelings for him because people always were pointing out that you two like each other you wondered if you actually did or if it just a small crush. bambam was always really confident, a real shittalker but as soon as you tried talking to him about it he’d always find his way out of the situations somehow.

C ⇴ CONFESSION

when he finally confessed you it was out of impulse. he didn’t plan to confess at all that day, it was just a normal day and the two of you were eating ice cream on the balcony when he suddenly asked if you’d like to go out on an actual date sometimes. 

D ⇴ DATES

dates with bambam were messy but in the best kind of way. don’t expect anything classic romantic because you’ll get dissapointed. still your dates were always filled with fun and softness. you’d get mcdonalds and drove somewhere, eating in your car, listening to music and talking while it slowly became night and dark outside. on special occasions like a birthday or an anniversary he’d take you out somewhere more expensive and went to the cinema or something similiar with you afterwards. he usually always asks what you want to do.

E ⇴ EXPERIENCE

before you bambam didn’t really had time to date because of becoming a trainee at young age but he still knows all the basics he needs to know. sometimes he doesn’t really get what your problem is when you are upset about something but he is constantly trying to understand you more and more.

F ⇴ FIGHTING

fighting bambam can go both ways: terribly frustrating or completely sad. it always depends on the topic. if y’all argue he literally has his own opinion and he makes sure you know that this is his opinion and you won’t be able to chance it. it doesn’t matter if he’s actually right in that moment, if he’s mad you won’t be able to chance his mind. usually ends in a lot of silence and ignoring each other for some moments. as soon as one of you stops being stubborn though the other one is totally down to also have a calmer talk. this is where it often gets sad. but he’d always make sure that after a fight you know how much you are actually worth to him and that he hates fighting.

G ⇴ GETTING TO KNOW HIS FAMILY

you’ve been dating some time until you actually got to meet his mother and his siblings because of your tight schedules it’s hard to find a time where you both actually have the time to fly to thailand. his sisters were desperate to finally meet you since you are actually bambams first girlfriend. i feel like his mother would be kind of chill and not give you a hard time at all.

H ⇴ HOME (living together)

moving was something you two usually didn’t spend much time thinking about because you both were fine with your own places. you’d spend your time at his apartment a lot and the other way around. this was until one day jackson asked why you’re even paying rent for two apartments when you could just live together. 

I ⇴ “I LOVE YOU”

bambam would seriously annoy the shit out of you sometimes because he could be very clingy. he’d tell you that he loves you at least four times a day and would laugh at your annoyed “i love you too”s. he just likes the concept of him being able to tell you so he doesn’t know why he shouldn’t do it. 

J ⇴ JEALOUSY

he could get jealous very easily if you pushed his buttons. usually he tried to ignore it when he gets jealous but if y’all are in a fight or something and you’d try to make him jealous he’d get seriously mad. i feel like he’d be mad at anyone, a stranger or one of his closest mates if you would just try to make him jealous. otherwise he can totally control it most of the times.

K ⇴ KISSING

a soft kisser. like real soft. he’d have his forehead pressed against yours and always a small smile on his lips. he’d always put your hair behind your ear before kissing you and would always somehow touch you while kissing. mostly he’d hold your waist or put his arms around your shoulders, pulling you into hug.

make out sessions can get heated, he’d be all breathless and a giggly mess.

L ⇴ LAUGHING TOGETHER

there are two scenarios: him laughing alone at something really unfunny and you start to laugh because you can’t believe how dumb it is that he really thinks its funny. the second one would just be the two of you watching some funny movies and laughing until it hurts. he always quotes the lines you laughed the most about even weeks after watching the movie making you laugh all over again.

M ⇴ MISSING

he wouldn’t be desperate as soon as he is on tour but there are always some days that feel so much harder than others. he’d try to call you as much as possible even though it makes it harder for him. on the bad days he’ll sometimes write you that it’s a bit too much today and he might not reply as much because it’s not easy for him to write with you when he would prefer being right beside you.

N ⇴ NICKNAMES

HONEY! this is an absolute headcanon. bambam just calls you honey all the time.

O ⇴ OBSESSION

he loved when you rant about something. he never really knew why but he thought it was hilarious and cute. you sometimes get so into ranting about one thing and just find bambam looking at you, nodding with a smile on his lips and you can literally see the love for you in his eyes.

P ⇴ PUBLIC/PDA

bambam would go public as fast as even possible. y’all would probably even almost public before you started dating. he wasn’t the type of guy who would kiss you all the time when you are out but he’d always either hold your hand or just made sure everyone would know he is your boyfriend. would be proud af when you wear his clothes outside. is just a little too excited about this relationship and has no fear of showing it. 

R ⇴ RANDOM FACTS

he’d always take really ugly pictures of you when you look the worst but he assures you they are cute even though you both know it’s complete bullshit. he says he needs them for when he’s away on tour (which sounds nsfw but i promise it’s just because he likes to look at them when he misses you) 

S ⇴ SEX

he can’t shut the fuck up. he always has to say something during sex. sometimes not even something like sweet nothing but just an information that he has to be earlier at work tomorrow. but you don’t mind actually, his voice is so sweet so hearing it is just a big plus.

but in general he’s either soft dom or rough sub if that makes sense. like he likes to have control but not in a bossy kind of way. like instead of calling you a slut he’s more like worshipping you while he’s in control. and when you take the dom part he just thinks it’s really hot and sometimes gets a little carried away.

T ⇴ TEXTING

V ⇴ VACATION

bambam would take you to thailand as often as he could. but not only to his hometown, just everywhere. he loved showing you every part of his home there is and also loves exploring parts of his homecountry he’s never seen before with you.

W ⇴ WHINING

would get whiny when you tease him. if you say the video he showes you isn’’t funny he would be 1 big ass whining mess. 

Z ⇴ ZZZ (Sleeping)

you loved when he fell asleep before you because damn does he look soft when he is suddenly not talking bullshit anymore. no but seriously, even after dating for what feels like forever you still loved sleeping right beside him. you didn’t even have to cuddle, just being beside him when he finally gets some rest gives you a calming vibe. as soon as you couldn’t sleep next to him you always felt like something is missing when he’s gone.

[caepaecaesurae]

> Cae and Sugary : Be highbloods.

Yesterday at 1:38 PM caepaecaesurae: My sympathies and/or congratulations on their return.

Yesterday at 3:11 PM sugary-empress: Sun is being a big jerk as per usual!~ I missed Mickey~ sugary-empress: )(e gives me a good kind of attention~ caepaecaesurae: To be fair, Sun platonically hates you wvith decent reason, and Mickey adores anything potentially harmful to him. sugary-empress: True!~

(( Cae Mopes(1) a Bit(2) on the dashboard about his reputation ))

Yesterday at 8:42 PM sugary-empress: You're really good and relatable~ caepaecaesurae: I sincerely sympathise wvith slightly too many of your daily wvoes. caepaecaesurae: Did I evwer tell you about the time Sparks nearly killed me?  It wvas a wvhile ago and didn't make the rounds.  Probably before you and I met. sugary-empress: I don't believe you did~ caepaecaesurae: I'm stuck thinking about it again, so I could do it out loud if you liked. Or I could ask you about your night, and wvhatevwer's of most interest to you. Not a trap question, both are equally fine. sugary-empress: I'm trying to p)(rase my interest in your fin in a way t)(at isn't a little off-putting and failing, but just know I tried~ Tell me about Sparks nearly krilling you, sugarfins~ caepaecaesurae: WVe all lovwe gossip, and it's not in line wvith my current relationship wvith him, so it's potentially interesting. Once upon a time, I wvas the ghost of the Orphaner, and hadn't remembered my other life yet.  I wvas unpleasant, but not evwil, and hungered to livwe again. Sparks wvas learning his powvers, I suggested he might be able to raise the dead, and vwolunteered as his first experimental subject.  He asked for help wvinning his game in return, and I accepted. caepaecaesurae: This might be taken as an example of me "manipulating" him.  I think I tried to let it be his idea. caepaecaesurae: Anywvays, there I wvas, on a meteor full of wvrigglers determined to take on an empire ruled by a competent Alternian adult.  There wvere no less than six frighteningly powverful psychics on our side, off the top of my head, and our enemy wvas knowvn to use mind control to steal the abilities of her enemies. I decided that the three seperate instances of Sollux Captor wvould not look kindly on the existance of psychic control collars, but it wvould be nice to be able to stop them wvithout killing them in an emergency. Sparks sawv the Orphaner Dualscar fabricating control collars. WVithout havwing informed anyone. sugary-empress: Yea)(, yep, u)( )(u)(, t)(at'd do it~ caepaecaesurae: He elected to come speak wvith me loudly on this subject. caepaecaesurae: I may havwe left a dent in the wvall, wvith unrequested assistance. .. WVe sorted it out. In the end, people they trusted more than me wvere to hold the collars. sugary-empress: You're so fucking c)(arasmatic and good at being useful~ And lucky, I suppose~ caepaecaesurae: I wvish luck played less part in it. caepaecaesurae: .. Thank you. There wvere a fewv close calls, around then. sugary-empress: Are t)(ey a lot fart)(er apart now?~ caepaecaesurae: .. You knowv, they are, nowv that you mention it. Three or four in a twvo-perigee period, and it's slowved dowvn to that many in the swveeps since then. caepaecaesurae: Perhaps I should be thicker-skinned about the death threats. sugary-empress: Good!~ First of all, becod you desurf good fins, and second of all, becod I'm feeling out my potential future, lmao~ Not t)(at you were ever as bad as M-E~ ... No?~ No, dear, t)(ose are distressing and you can be distressed by t)(em~ caepaecaesurae: Heh.  I'm likely a somewvhat abbrevwiated vwersion of the path ahead, aye.. There's the angry period wvhere no one trusts you.  The less angry period, wvhere most people don't but one or twvo do. The Hesitant period, wvhere you are dubiously tolerated and evwerything is uncomfortable, but you're still allowved to do things. ..and I'm still feeling out wvhat comes after that. sugary-empress: Ideally, Normal Life ™, I'd imagine~ caepaecaesurae: I think there's a fewv more steps.  Either that, or occasional backslides. sugary-empress: Babe, you can't distract me from you saying you need to get over actual t)(reats against your life~ caepaecaesurae: ...But aye.  Sometimes it feels like it's in sight. That's a shame. I told you they're infrequent. sugary-empress: 38( caepaecaesurae: Some incidents aren't evwen death threats, just curiously vwiolent. sugary-empress: A)(, yes, "curious"~ caepaecaesurae: There wvas a girl, once, vwisiting the timeline.  Fond of Arlequin. caepaecaesurae: She wvas here wvhen he and I made our peace, and he lost his hand. She didn't bother looking into the situation, to see that it wvas a judgement he asked for.  Decided to come talk to me about it, wvith a blade. I spent a good wveek recovwering from that one. Sparks tried to institute a "No revwenge maiming" rule. I told the girl I'd only forgivwe her if she did to herself wvhat she did to me. She did, so wve wvent on a fewv barbeques later and actually made up. sugary-empress: T)(ose kindsa rules get followed strictly all t)(e time, and are never )(otbloodedly broken!~ )(mm~ caepaecaesurae: I really adore the pictures she took of wvhat she did.  Technically no rules wvere broken. caepaecaesurae: I think I'vwe been moping a bit.  You're sure that's a normal response? sugary-empress: Moping?~ caepaecaesurae: Aye.  After threats or "incidents". sugary-empress: Yes, dear, moping is normal~ You can try to just do w)(at I do and not feel bad emotions, but I don't sink it's )(ealt)(y for you people~ caepaecaesurae: ..I'm sorry, hearing that advwice from you in particular is making me smile a bit. I can't really object to your point though. sugary-empress: Look, you don't need to call me out like t)(is, w)(en I've done nofin wrong~ caepaecaesurae: There is a unique benefit, I think, to hearing advwice from a source that wvould nevwer wvillingly say it if it wvere not true. And that's beautiful. sugary-empress: )(ee)(ee~ I suppose you're correct~ caepaecaesurae: Thank you for being yourself. sugary-empress: It's just aboat all I can be, sweetfins~ caepaecaesurae: WVe can all be so many things. caepaecaesurae: Sorry, I think I keep deflecting.  I'll think about the moping issue more. sugary-empress: I sink I'm different, t)(en~ I can only be one person, going one fin~ You sure do, my dear~ Force of )(abit, I'm sure~ caepaecaesurae: I think convwersational habits like that might be part of wvhy people find me insincere, and get bent out of shape.  Damn if they aren't hard to drop though. sugary-empress: Give it anotter few decades, love, I'm sure it'll fade if you make an effort~ caepaecaesurae: Ideally. It almost feels sometimes like the communication...thing, has been getting wvorse. sugary-empress: Since w)(en?~ W)(at variables )(ave c)(anged?~ caepaecaesurae: I suppose the most obvwious marker wvould be since the psiionic arrivwed, but it wvas before then I think. There wvas at least a half swveep wvhere things wvere fine, maybe twvo... ..I wvant to say ovwer the past half swveep or so, if I had to nail it dowvn. Maybe the last full swveep. He's returned and started being rather pointed about...things he has full right to be pointed about. It comes up in convwersations not invwolvwing him at all, though. sugary-empress: )(ey, idiot, I sink your Psii is a maaajor stressor in your life~ T)(ere are otters, but especially )(im~ )(e raised your baseline stress up )(ig)(er, and kept you on edge~ Is t)(ere any way of getting rid of )(im?~ caepaecaesurae: ...and wvhen I am uneasy, I default to my Alternian response, wvhich is to not emote and hide wvhether I care about things. Mmn.  Honestly I'd rather not get rid of him, I'd rather he wvas happy somewvhere.  WVe wvere friends once. sugary-empress: )(e could be )(appy away from you~ You won't be friends again~ caepaecaesurae: A man can dream. And unfortunately, all of my quadrants are either his family or his ex.  Or, in one case, my alternate in a wvorld wvhere our roles wvere swvapped. WVhich is a unique and horrific twvist. sugary-empress: I don't know if your social circle can sustain you bot)(, and )(e may )(ave t)(e )(istory, but you've got your silver tongue~ You'll win t)(is, deliberately or not, w)(en people need to c)(oose~ caepaecaesurae: Eesh. He's convwinced of exactly that, evwen though I'm trying to make space for us both. sugary-empress: You'll need to try really fucking )(ard, and ensure t)(ere are c)(ances for )(IM to try wit)(out feeling like )(e's being pulled by your strings~ If anyone could manage, it could be you, but I don't sink anyone can~ caepaecaesurae: hm. Chances for him to try wvhat, exactly? It's ass-backwvards that I might havwe to manipulate him into believwing he's not being manipulated, but if needs must. sugary-empress: To fill t)(e space you're leaving~ Dearest, isn't t)(at t)(e most essential manipulation of all?~ You must )(ave practice, even if you usually use it to cover up ot)(er mac)(inations instead of independently~ caepaecaesurae: One doesn't normally use the handle of a fork on its owvn, no. ... He took a journey wvith my moirail, recently.  Apparently he wvas in good spirits after. I don't knowv if it helped, but at least he felt better. sugary-empress: )(im feeling better is good, so long as, again, it doesn't feel like )(e's being lulled into complacency~ caepaecaesurae: He's still just as bitey, either wvay.

sugary-empress: ((I'm just imagining him finding out about this conversation, he'd lose his fucking mind "Look, he's PLOTTING with an EMPRESS")) caepaecaesurae: (( it is uniquely hilarious, and I've started sharing select quotes from this with the mun as we speak )) (( I don't think psii will find out, but cae does have a mundane computer now, so, if he ever hacked him. ))

caepaecaesurae: He somewvhat threatened to vwisit in person to relate a story I wvas hoping he'd relate online. I'm still not entirely comfortable wvith sharing a face to face convwersation just yet. sugary-empress: I understand w)(y, dear~ T)(is sounds roug)(~ caepaecaesurae: I really hope this doesn't end wvith a murder attempt.  I think the legal angle wvould not be to his favwor, but I don't knowv for certain. ... Pardon for complaining.  I don't knowv too many trolls sympathetic to ah, the morally indefensible side of this. I mean, I'vwe changed as much as I can, I still don't havwe much right to complain that he's still angry. sugary-empress: I )(ope so too, you're important~ Sorry I'm pretty pet name )(eavy tonig)(t, btw~ You (almost) never need to apologise for complaining to me, sweetness~ I just wis)( I )(ad like, a one step perfect solution to toss at you~ Well, you've got rig)(t to complain, just no rig)(t to expect an especially sympat)(etic audience~ caepaecaesurae: One step perfect solutions are a wvonderful thought, and so terribly rare.  They're wvorth wvistfully longing after though. caepaecaesurae: Heh.  The sympathetic audience is appreciated. I don't mind the pet names.  I havwe an easy time falling into them myself. caepaecaesurae: There are some things wve didn't talk about particularly, after the fusion incident.  Either because wve didn't need to, or because wve likely should just nevwer do so.  WVe still shouldn't, but I remember them sometimes. sugary-empress: Yea)(~ T)(at's an underw)(elming response, but, yea)(~ It's quite late, cupcake, I otter sleep~ caepaecaesurae: A fair and wvise response. It's late here as wvell.  Pardon the philosophical meandering. Rest wvell. sugary-empress: I like t)(e meandering!~ Good day~ caepaecaesurae: It's an acquired taste, but I'm glad you enjoy it too.

[joementa]

Week Of May 1, 2017.

This week was the kick-off of what I have deemed Emo Fest 2K17, consisting of four consecutive (for me) Ryan Adams/DRA shows.  I won’t complain about that.  Although after four DRA shows in a row, my emotions might be doing some complaining. Night 1 of Emo Fest 2K17 was at the Beacon Theatre in NYC.  Alex Edelman, a stand-up comic, opened the show.  I really enjoyed it.  I’ve always felt a connection with stand-up comics.  Not because of humor (I like to say that I TRY to be funny.  I don’t necessarily think that I AM funny), but because I think stand-up comics face one of the loneliest and most naked positions you could ever be in.  And a part of me has felt that way my entire life.  DRA’s show was fantastic, of course.  He was in a great mood, and was very funny, too.  The songs sounded great.  They ROCKED. The crowd was really great, too. They were locked into it, and everyone stood for the entire show.  That was nice, because as I said, this was a rock show.  

If you go to a lot of shows, you know that NYC always brings a great crowd.  And that’s emphasized more when a musician or band has a connection to the great city, which DRA does.  He played “New York, New York” solo acoustic, right up at the front of the stage, and you could hear a pin drop during that performance.  I was really happy that he played “Kim”.  It’s one of my favorite songs of his, from his great self-titled album.  “When The Stars Go Blue” was of course absurdly beautiful.  He also included a cover of “Wonderwall”, solo on electric guitar. What a performance.

Emo Fest 2K17 Night 2 was back at the Beacon, another sold out show.  One thing that was different from the previous night – I had a FRONT ROW ticket.  Pretty tough to beat that!  The show of course was great – both the band and the crowd rocked.  There’s nothing like an NYC crowd.  This show had TWO solo acoustic performances, and they were truly acoustic – no plugging in at all.  It was just DRA with an unplugged acoustic guitar, singing into the microphone.  Unlike the previous night, “New York, New York” was played full-band.  This may have been even more powerful than the night before.  There’s something very moving hearing DRA sing that great song in that great city.  I’ll never get tired of seeing shows in this city.  

After the show, two people approached me and told me that I was fun to watch.  They said it looked like I was having a lot of fun.  I actually have had many people over the years tell me this after shows, and my response is always, “Thank you.  And, if it looked like I was having fun, well that’s because I was!”  I can’t help but express myself when I’m at a show.  Often to a fault, music is my main form of communicating.  A feeling comes over me at a show, ESPECIALLY at a rock show, that is almost out of my body and mind.  I am singing and dancing and clapping and doing my signature finger pumping (those who have been with me at a show before know what this is).  I am completely lost in a higher place. That’s why I go to the shows.

Night 3 of Emo Fest 2K17 was at the Tower Theatre, outside of Philly.  I’m a big fan of that venue and have seen a bunch of great shows there over the years.  DRA’s show this year was a little weird.  The band, of course, was awesome.  DRA probably interacted with the crowd even more than in NYC.  He told a funny story about how a vending machine took his money in high school, so he shook it to get his candy and it fell on him, breaking his pinky.  He topped it off by saying that a high school friend said he was a member of Rage Against The Vending Machine.  That’s so cheesy that it’s hilarious.  

Although the story was funny, I come to these shows to feel it from the band and the crowd.  Like Bruce says, “in the crowd I feel at home.” I did not feel at home in this crowd. All of DRA’s main set was played with an electric guitar, and as I’ve said before, this was a true ROCK show.  At most rock shows, I am on an emotional journey, both internally and externally.  And you would think that a Saturday night crowd in Philly would have some sort of external reaction in a rock show.  Guess again.  Almost nobody stood up during this show, and for the few of us who did, we were verbally attacked by the crowd for doing it.  To top it off, DRA closed the show with “Come Pick Me Up” in the encore, which he traditionally plays.  This version was solo acoustic.  Guess what the crowd did.  If you guessed that they sat in their seat like they did for all of the rock songs, you would be wrong.  They stood and sang during the entire song.  Then the show was over.  Oh well. I still enjoyed the show.  I just had to enjoy it internally.

There were a bunch of new albums that came out this week that I need to check out, but because of Emo Fest 2K17, I’ve only had a chance to check out a couple of them.  In particular, I love the new Afghan Whigs album In Spades.  This should not be a surprise to anyone who knows me, because I love that band.  Their lead singer, Greg Dulli, is one of my favorite singers.  He does a fantastic job of combining a variety of genres and emotions in his voice.  I saw him live once, but unfortunately have not yet seen The Afghan Whigs live.  That will change this year, as they just announced a fall tour in the US, which I will not be missing.  The tour dates are right here.  I cannot give their show my own stamp of approval since I’ve never seen them, but I can’t imagine that they would put on a bad show.  I’m really looking forward to those shows later this year.

There are a lot of reissues coming up, and I think all of these are worth being excited for.  

A bunch of Iron Maiden vinyl reissues are slated for this summer.  Below is the schedule.

May 19

Fear Of The Dark

No Prayer For The Dying

The X Factor

Virtual

June 23

A Matter Of Life And Death

Brave New World

Dance Of Death

Rock In Rio

July 21

Death On The Road

En Vivo!

Flight 666

The Final Frontier

Purple Rain is being reissued on June 23, and there is a lot to be excited about here. There are a variety of options, but the Deluxe – Expanded Edition is the way to go, in my opinion.  Disc one is the original album (obviously), the second disc is 11 songs from the vault including 6 never before heard songs, and a third disc all of the singles and B-sides from the Purple Rain era.  Plus it comes with a DVD of Prince and The Revolution live on March 30, 1985.  No word yet on whether or not this is coming out on vinyl, but count me in either way!

One of my favorite albums ever is Exodus by Bob Marley.  It turns 40 years old this year, and not surprisingly, they are doing a massive reissue to celebrate.  There are a few different versions that will be released, which you can read about right here. I’m particularly excited about the super deluxe reissue version.  It includes FOUR vinyl LPs (including the original album, a “restatement” version that includes previously unused and unheard vocals, a live show), plus a bonus 7” with a previously unreleased version of “Waiting In Vain”.  Apparently the “restatement” version of “Turn Your Lights Down Low” is really good, and has an R&B vibe.  I’m excited to hear that one.  “Turn Your Lights Down Low” is my favorite Bob Marley song.

Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band was released 50 years ago this year, and they are celebrating it in a big way.  One again, there are a variety of options.  The double vinyl release includes a new stereo mix of the album for disc one, and a full disc of complete early takes from the Sgt. Pepper’s sessions in the same sequence as the album proper.  More music from The Beatles that has never been heard before. I will not complain about that. This comes out May 26.

Warpaint by the Black Crowes is being reissued on June 16

Here is a list of some of the music I’ve been listening to the past week.  Format: musician – album title, or musician – “song title” (album title).  As you can see by the list below, I listened to a lot of Bruce this week.  I’m still riding high from his storytellers discussion in NYC last week, and to keep it going, I had to listen to a lot of his music.  I usually do that when I see one of my favorite musicians.  I wouldn’t be surprised to see a lot of DRA on this list next week.

The Counting Crows – “A Long December” (Recovering The Satellites)

The Gaslight Anthem – “Mae” (Handwritten)

Bruce Springsteen – Greetings From Asbury Park, New Jersey

Bruce Springsteen – The Wild, The Innocent & The E-Street Shuffle

Bruce Springsteen – Born To Run

Bruce Springsteen – Darkness On The Edge Of Town

Bruce Springsteen – The River

Bruce Springsteen – Born In The U.S.A.

Bruce Springsteen – “Save My Love” b/w “Because The Night”

Bruce Springsteen & The E-Street Band – Scottrade Center, St. Louis, MO 8/23/08

Karen Elson – Double Roses

Iron & Wine – Archive Series Volume 3

Lady Gaga – “The Cure”

Prince – Prince

Prince – “I Could Never Take The Place Of Your Man” (Sign O’ The Times)

The Afghan Whigs – In Spades

Chris Stapleton – From A Room, Volume 1

The Afghan Whigs – Black Love

The Afghan Whigs – “Faded” (Black Love)

Maren Morris – Hero

Ed Sheeran – Divide

Joni Mitchell – Court and Spark

D’Angelo – Brown Sugar

[anmousewrites]

So uh

I just hit the halfway point in my Gundam Wing rewatch, and I thought about doing a write up for it. Then I thought, well, why not put it on my writing blog? That’s kind of why I have a writing blog isn’t it? To put my writing on? So below the cut is completely unabashed nerdiness and my thoughts about this show now that I am halfway done.

First off, this soundtrack is still the best soundtrack of basically any media I have consumed in my entire life. Part of this (part of all of this, undoubtedly) is nostalgia. I remember these songs! But also, they are undeniably awesome and way more in depth and grand than they needed to be. GW just sounds really good. Whether it's a recognizable title song or just background music. It's all just fucking great. This shit makes me want to party.

Second off, I'm gonna actually throw all my criticism in early. This show is very 1995, and some of the animation frames are hilariously bad. There's still one or two spots where the translations (while correct) aren't the most clear. One or two side characters have really obnoxious voices for some reason. There is a truly ridiculous amount of monologuing and political commentary and Contemplate Our Navels going on. The show is casually racist in the way where there are characters of colour, but only side characters and they are only every portrayed as 1000000% good. Now, don't get me wrong, I love the Maganac Corps and they are portrayed as being good, honest, hardworking people who are exceedingly loyal (and funny!), but none of them get to be MC and none of them get the same kind of multidimensionality that other characters get. That's still kind of a raw deal. Doesn't mean I love them any less, though. And to be fair, for an anime from 1995... I'm just kinda happy they are there at all. Arguably there's also one or two brown people of colour who are bad, so I guesssss that's okay, but the Maganac Corps are always the sticking point for a lot of people. They're written very warmly, I love them, I am not sorry.

Okay,  whining aside. Let's talk about more good shit.

The characters, holy shit, these fucking characters, though.

The five main boys, I love them.

Heero “I Have Too May Feelings And No Idea How To Handle Them” Yuy Trowa “I'm Still Learning How To Have Feelings And It's Terrible” Barton

Quatre “I Have Space Empathy And Also Am A Little Psycho And Am Also A Cinnamon Roll” Winner Chang “I'm Pretending To Be A Misogynist Because I Can't Handle My Guilt Also I'm Secretly Really Nice” Wufei Duo “I'm Literally Perfect Why Does Bad Shit Happen To Me All The Time” Maxwell

Like, Wufei was never my favourite as a kid because goddamn, could you shut up about honour and weak people for like 10 minutes please? But with the context of the manga and also a good rewatch, I get it.  You're sad because your wife had more balls than you and got herself killed for it. So, you feel constantly inadequate and pick on other people's weaknesses. And guess what? Sometimes he's right. He calls out Noin for attacking him in emotion when she's doing exactly that. To be fair, when he calls Sally weak, she fucking agrees with him and sets him straight about what that really means. So, I have less beef with him now.  The other four I love and have always loved, so w/e same old same old.

THIS IS A FORMAL APPOLOGY TO RELEENA GODDAMN DARLIN/PEACECRAFT FOR EVERYTHING YOUNG ME THOUGHT ABOUT YOU

You were blonde and wore pink and chased after a boy and I thought you were dumb. I conveniently forgot the time you snuck into a party and hid a gun in the bow of your dress, so when someone offered you a rose from the lapel of an officer's uniform you could announce that roses don't really suit you and you'd look better BATHED IN THE BLOOD OF OZ.

Girl, I did you wrong. I am so sorry.

I get it now. Why she chases after Heero. At first, it's because he exemplifies everything that's fucked up in her life (the strife with the colonies is what causes her to miss so much time with her father, after all), and later, he's actively working against the people who murdered her dad, so like, I get it. It's not smart even by a longshot, but I get it. Also, it later puts her in position for all the other awesome shit she needs to do, so she gets a pass from me.

Hilde is okay. I don’t remember her voice being like that. Maybe I don’t love her because she was introduced later than the others. I like her pep, but compared to the other ladies, she doesn’t really excite me. Still we have 25 episodes left.

Noin and Sally? I've loved hem since the beginning and I love them now. Noin is Life Goals AND Wife Goals and Sally is good and gets shit done and is just generally a pleasure to watch. Une? Man, I do love her, but holy shit she gets a raw deal. Une baby, I am so sorry for your brain. You break my fucking heart and I love you.

Treize Kushrenada, I blame you for breaking your girlfriend. I mean, at this point, he actually can't speak sincerely to anyone, at all, ever. So it's no wonder that his conflicting orders got her all fucked up. You can't tell her that you want peace and then constantly undermine it without her getting confused. (I mean, you also can't be honest and tell her that your goal is a war with a kill count so horrifyingly high that people won't want to fight for a while, so being honest is kind of out of the question.) She split herself into two people to try and pursue both your goals. You wanted loyalty? You fuckin got it. Still, at least he genuinely does care about her. And it must be hard to have literally no one you can talk to. Not even Zechs, at that point, who has his own role to play.

Also, Teize is a great example of a character that you don't often see. Arguably, he is a Mary Sue, the center of a cult of personality so engaging that it persists long after his death (talking about Endless Waltz here, people). I mean, I fucking love this guy. I'm IN LOVE with this guy. As is, arguably, almost everyone else who meets him. Also, this is one of the reasons I don't give a fuck about the monologuing. All the voice acting for the mains is great, and I could listen to them all day.

Also Zechs Marquise/Milliardo Peacecraft whoever the fuck you feel like being today (because you did swap back and forth when it suits you, I saw that). You are a dramatic, rules lawyer piece of beautiful trash and I love you.

Is that everybody important? It's almost 4 am here so god, forgive me if this makes no sense.

The plot of Gundam is pretty good. I mean, I've gotten really engaged in what's going to happen and I still already  remember the major twists. I forgot about Trowa blowing up Deathscythe (ow, my heart), I forgot about Quatre being degraded by his father, I forgot how much I fucking love Sally “Mom Voice” Po. “Mama told me real men never scream out loud.” Holy shit. Emotionally, this show has me by the balls, and I kind of like that.

So, I have 25 more episodes to go, plus Endless Waltz. Does this show hold up to what I remember? Actually, it's better. As I've quoted before, the amount of times I catch something new, that I didn't get ten years ago when I watched it, is almost every episode. Most of the flaws are things that I would expect to see in an anime that was produced in 1995. Overall, I'm having a damn good time and I can't see that changing any time soon.

EDIT: Okay, I lied a little. I wasn’t quite halfway. I just hit that point now, at 5:07. If I had thought this show lost its touch at all, I was wrong. Dead fucking wrong. There’s something so truly awful about Dark!Quatre, about Trowa’s speech, about Wufei and Duo facing death in their dark cell and about Treize’s suicide offer. I know Une isn’t dead but damn if I didn’t I’d be in tears. How did I forget this episode.  tl;dr, I guess this answers the question, doesn’t it?

[jenmedsbookreviews]

The three defining images from a wonderfully bookish week. I cannot tell you how perfect it is sometimes to be in this bookish world of ours. It has its down moments, doesn’t everything in life, but mostly it is a perfect place to escape to and one which makes me very, very happy. It is fair to say that this week I have been a very lucky and very spoilt book blogger.

It all began on Wednesday, when I booked half a day off work and travelled to London to join Karen Sullivan and Antti Tuomainen for the UK launch of the absolutely hilarious and brilliant The Man Who Died. I love this book, definitely one of my top books for 2017 and if you want to know how much, my review can be found here. I was thrilled to be able to make this event. We were small in number but it was a brilliant night none the less. It also gave me signed book number one of the week.

Arriving home on Thursday gave me my second absolutely bouncy moment of the week. Probably bouncier than Wednesday and I’d consumed a lot of caffeine on Wednesday to keep me going until I got home about 00:30. You see I arrived home to a lovely little package –  a signed copy of Broken Bones by the lovely Angela Marsons. For anyone who managed to miss it (lucky you – believe me) I did a (not so) short video review of Broken Bones for its launch earlier this month, It was my pleasure to do this as I love the Kim Stone series, I just hope it came over how much in the review. If you are daft enough or haven’t suffered enough already, you can find the review here.

And then, as if I hadn’t been spoiled enough this week, Mandie and I took a short drive up North to Hull Noir on Friday. Two days of some very brilliant panels ensued, and it was lovely to be able to catch up with some of the top bloggers around including Susan, Rachel, Anne, Noelle, Sheila, Dave and probably one of the loveliest and most fabulous people I have met, my blogging twin, Abbie Rutherford. We started blogging in pretty much the exact same week and Abbie has been a huge source of inspiration and support to me so I so chuffed we finally got to meet. I can testify she looks nothing like her profile pictures! I also picked up another couple of signed books, this time from Mark Billingham – the first (Sleepyhead) and the most recent books in his Tom Thorne series. I recently reviewed Love Like Blood (here) and had a great compliment off Mark about it, so it was nice to be able to say hello and thank him for it in person. And I have smiley (and not so smiley) faces in my book too 🙂

Panel wise, we took in three panels each day, listening to great talks from a wonderful bunch of Crime Writers on such a diverse range of topics. Far too many highlights to be able to list them all, each panel giving the audience something different. Martina Cole on Saturday was hilarious, as were Mark Billingham and John Connolly closing out the event on Sunday.

From Danielle Ramsay admitting to coming very close to antagonizing a real Whitley Bay gangster, Steph Broadribb admitting to defending a young girl’s honour in a kebab shop, through to Matt Wesolowski, author of possibly one of the most culturally and technologically relevant books of the moment, admitting to hating social media and steering clear of technology, you couldn’t ask for a better couple of days. Well done to all who were involved in arranging the event and thanks to all who took part. It was a bloody brilliant weekend.

Anyway. All this travel really screwed up my reading and book buying plans. Other than the few mentioned above, I only managed to buy a couple of books … The Reunion by Samantha Hayes and Hell To Pay by Rachel Amphlett. Netgalley wise, I just picked up The Silent Children by Carol Wyer and The Cover Up by Marnie Riches.

Reading wise was quite pathetic too. I only managed three. And one of those was a novella!

Books I have read

The Last Post by B.K. Duncan

It is April 1918. May Keaps is a twenty-year-old ambulance driver stationed at The Front. As if transporting hideously wounded soldiers, sleep deprivation and constant shell bombardment weren’t enough, she becomes unwittingly entangled in the untimely death of a young captain, Tobias Fairfax.

Newly-arrived in Northern France he was found with a discharged pistol by his side; rumours on the battlefield were that it wasn’t an accident and he had taken the coward’s way out, committing suicide.

Whatever the explanation, Tobias left a dangerous legacy that puts May in the line of fire. But she is not the only one with a reason to want to uncover the truth. And in a world where life can be extinguished in the blink of an eye, May might regret her search for answers…

The Last Post is the haunting introduction to the May Keaps series.

This was a great little novella, quite a serious subject but a wonderful introduction to May Keaps and I’m looking forward to reading her continued story. I’ll be sharing my review soon and you can pick up a copy for free here.

…

Now You See Me by Kierney Scott

As she saw his face for the first time, she knew he was going to kill her. She just didn’t know when.

When the dismembered body of Lydia Steiner is found washed up in the waters of a blisteringly hot Louisiana swamp, Detective Jess Bishop knows for certain this isn’t the murderer’s first kill.

Three other dismembered bodies have been found, all bearing the same marks. Marks that strike fear into Jess’s heart. They are identical to those from a case she’s spent her entire career trying to forget.

As Jess and her team try to link the victims, another body is discovered and they fear the serial killer is taunting them. They know it’s only a matter of time before he kills again.

As the body count rises, and the hunt goes cold, Jess knows she has to confront her past in order to catch the killer, even if that means making herself the bait…

Now You See Me is a gripping and heart-stopping thriller full of twists and perfect for fans of Robert Dugoni, Karin Slaughter, Robert Bryndza and Lisa Gardner.

Wow. What an opened to a series. You certainly get to know protagonist Jess Bishop and her partner Jamison pretty well. I’ll be sharing my thoughts as part of the blog blitz next week, but if you’d like to read a very assured debut for what looks set to be a cracking series, you can preorder a copy here.

…

The Deaths of December by Susi Holliday

The hunt is on for a serial killer in this thrilling festive crime novel

It looks like a regular advent calendar.

Until DC Becky Greene starts opening doors…and discovers a crime scene behind almost every one.

The police hope it’s a prank. Because if it isn’t, a murderer has just surfaced – someone who’s been killing for twenty years.

But why now? And why has he sent it to this police station?

As the country relaxes into festive cheer, Greene and DS Eddie Carmine must race against time to catch the killer. Because there are four doors left, and four murders will fill them…

It’s shaping up to be a deadly little Christmas.

I listened to the audio book of this on the way to Hull and back. If you are looking for the perfect pre-christmas pain killer, something to capture the festive spirit in a completely saccharine free way, then this may be the book for you. I loved it, but then I’m anti-Christmas. I’ll be sharing my thoughts on the book soon in the countdown to December’s First Monday Crime, but you can bag yourself a copy right here.

…

That was it. A bit pathetic really given I was home for at least a couple of days last week 😉 Blog was busy though with posts all week. This past week marked a whole year of posting every day, apart from Christmas Day and Boxing Day. Quite an achievement I think. Thanks to Mandie for helping with that.

#BlogBlitz: The Puppet Master by Abigail Osborne

#FestiveReads: A Christmas Wish by Erin Green

#BlogTour: The Future Can’t Wait by Angelena Boden

#FestiveReads: Christmas With the Bomb Girls by Daisy Styles

#BookLove: Victoria Goldman

#BlogBlitz: Dying Day by Stephen Edger

#FestiveReads: Mince Pies and Mistletoe at the Christmas Market by Heidi Swain

The week ahead is pretty full too. I have blog tours today for Hell To Pay by Rachel Amphlett, tomorrow for The Perfect Victim by Corrie Jackson and on Thursday for The CWA Anthology: Mystery Tour. On top of that are some reviews and a little more book love so I hope you can stop by for all of that.

Have a perfectly bookish week all. I’m off to Dublin on Wednesday which means valuable reading time at the airport. Can’t wait.

See you next week

Jen

  Rewind, recap: Weekly update w/e 19/11/17 The three defining images from a wonderfully bookish week. I cannot tell you how perfect it is sometimes to be in this bookish world of ours.

[junker-town]

The Jalen Ramsey vs. A.J. Green rivalry and 5 more things we loved about the NFL in Week 9

Fights, bad speeches and the “Hill Mary” dominated Sunday’s NFL action.

The extra hour of sleep NFL players got apparently resulted in many of them getting up Sunday on the wrong side of the bed — because everybody was fighting.

There were three separate fighting occasions on Sunday. Jalen Ramsey and A.J. Green got into it after Ramsey shoved Green. Later, Jameis Winston instigated a fight by poking Marcus Lattimore in the helmet, then Mike Evans came out of nowhere to drill Lattimore. The final fight was between the Cardinals and 49ers, where three players were ejected.

But the best bout was between Jalen Ramsey and A.J. Green. It eventually got to a point where Ramsey shoved Green to his limit (quite literally) and Green did his best Andre Johnson impression in throwing haymakers after pulling him down by the neck.

Both players were ejected from the game, though it doesn’t quite make sense why Ramsey was. Green took him down twice by the neck and got a couple of punches in. Ramsey did instigate it, but should have probably just received a personal foul.

Violence isn’t good, but it is refreshing to see anything resembling a rivalry or bad blood in the NFL. We got small doses of it with Josh Norman and Odell Beckham Jr. in 2015 and Norman and Dez Bryant in 2016.

Most players in the NFL are competitive and passionate about the game, it’s how they got there. If that comes out to the highest degree, it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world to accept it at certain intervals. It’s not like anybody got hurt on Sunday.

Ramsey is one of the best young corners in the NFL today, and next time the Jaguars play the Bengals, that’s going to be a matchup to watch with Green. You can’t say that about many other teams or players in the league when it comes down to wanting to destroy the opposition.

Jameis Winston eating his fingers

I don’t know if Winston did this because he knew there was a camera in the huddle or what, but buddy...

Jameis Winston with an ... interesting pump up speech. http://pic.twitter.com/z0tESHAA6k

— FOX Sports: NFL (@NFLonFOX) November 5, 2017

I don’t believe I find this nearly as weird as everybody else does, only because I am too busy finding it incredibly hilarious that a human being could have conceived an idea like this.

Winston really had to wake up one day, think of this, and say to himself, “This is what’s going to get us over the hump this week!”

And I mean, who knows where his hands have been prior to the game. Surely at that point he had been throwing around the football, which had plenty of other hands on them as well. It’s not like he was kissing his fingertips, either. He was putting entire digits up in his mouth like sausages.

As it turns out, the Bucs weren’t hungry enough for that W because they got mollywhopped 30-10. I’m here for another wacky Winston pump-up effort, though.

More like Ben McAdon’tSpeak to your team

For all of the press conference rants — good or bad — that coaches have gone on throughout the years, this might be the worst thing I’ve ever seen.

Ben McAdoo's halftime speeches sound epic http://pic.twitter.com/9HyJPPVOOh

— Andrew Joseph (@AndyJ0seph) November 5, 2017

McAdoo couldn’t even come up with anything fake that he told his team at halftime. He didn’t even try to deflect with “Oh uh, well, that’s between me and the guys, yanno?” This man really had nothing to say to his team.

After getting smoked by the Rams, the Giants are now 1-7 on the season. If McAdoo keeps this up, there’s no question his biggest L won’t be on the field. It’ll be on “Black Monday” when John Mara picks up the phone, or passes him a pink slip, whatever.

He’s totally getting fired.

The ceiling is the roof for Cam Newton

This pains me as a Falcons fan, but Cam Newton really brought the hammer down on Marcus Trufant on Sunday.

Newton had that extension that Blake Griffin had the first time he turned Timofey Mozgov into a poster where he basically threw the ball in.

The dunk touchdown was appropriate with the Panthers playing in Charlotte, where Michael Jordan (you may have heard of him) owns the Hornets. He also played a little college ball at North Carolina.

If the NFL ever wants a silhouette-type logo like MLB or NBA, they could take this one into consideration:

Of course, it would obvioulsy be some Tom Brady, Joe Montana, Johnny Unitas, or some other quarterback’s silhouette. Though it should totally be Marshawn Lynch grabbing his crotch.

Anyway ...

The “Hill Mary” is the play you didn’t know you needed in your life

The Chiefs’ offense has been one of the most fun to watch this season. Between Kareem Hunt, Tyreek Hill, Travis Kelce, and Alex Smith throwing passes longer than five yards, it’s been electric.

With two seconds left in the first half, the Chiefs ran what was basically a long screen pass to Hill, who picked up a couple of blocks, and used his world-class speed to find the end zone.

There were at least seven Cowboys back there, y’all, against four Chiefs. I’m not great at math but those odds seem to be in the Cowboys’ favor.

The Chiefs didn’t win this game, but they did show that if you aren’t a Hail Mary expert like The Great Aaron Rodgers, you have other options.

That is of course, you have a wide receiver faster than a cheetah.

POTATO SACK RACE TOUCHDOWN CELEBRATION

Are we sure the Chiefs actually lost this game? Because they had the two best moments from this game.

After a Travis Kelce touchdown in the second half to give the Chiefs a 17-14 lead, he, along with Tyreek Hill and Demarcus Robinson had a pretend potato sack race.

Hill and Robinson both pretended to fall down, making Kelce the appropriate winner. I mean, he did score the touchdown after all.

After a slow start to the season, group celebrations are starting to become more common.

The Steelers were off this week, and had an entire week to come up with new stuff. Please believe we’ll have something from the black and gold up in here next week. For now, we’ll be more than happy with this work of art.

OTHER THINGS FROM WEEK 9:

TED GINN JR. GAVE A BABY A TOUCHDOWN BALL

Keelan Cole saved a Blake Bortles incompletion with a one-handed snag

*6th pass* *interception* Brock Osweiler BACK

The Rams showed just how bad the Giants are on one play

The Saints tried to be tricky and failed miserably

Welcome to Philly, Jay Ajayi

Jameis Winston instigated a fight after being out with an injury

Cam Newton screamed at Riverboat Ron, who didn’t like it

FINISH. THE. PLAY.

Eli Manning cracked 50,000 passing yards — he’s the 7th to do it

JULINOOOOOOOOOOO

FOX pulled a fast one on Falcons fans

The Cowboys gave Tony Romo a warm welcome back

Blair Walsh missed three kicks in the first half. T H R E E.

Cam Newton has clearly never seen Titanic

Alex Smith finally threw an interception

The Cardinals and 49ers fought too, because that’s what everyone did this week

Sunday scores

Colts 20, Texans 14

Washington 17, Seahawks 14

Titans 23, Ravens 20

Saints 30, Buccaneers 10

Rams 51, Giants 17

Eagles 51, Broncos 23

Panthers 20, Falcons 17

Jaguars 23, Bengals 7

Cardinals 20, 49ers 10

Cowboys 28, Chiefs 17

Raiders 27, Dolphins 24