#hints of elmax and elumax

[brbsoulnomming]

Tell Me Sweet Little Lies Part 23

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 14 | Part 15 | Part 16 | Part 17 | Part 18 | Part 19 | Part 20 | Part 21 | Part 22 | AO3

-----

They're on the front page for about a week.

They run the stories of Hopper and Henry Creel simultaneously - honestly, Eddie kind of thinks the fact that Hopper was presumed dead and is now back makes it easier for people to believe a previously assumed dead guy is the top suspect for the murders.

Eddie gets barely a mention clearing him of all charges. There's a couple of articles about him and Steve fighting off Henry Creel, but the focus is more on Steve than anything else.

Steve bitches about it, about how they did the same thing after Starcourt, but Eddie's kind of glad his name isn't plastered all over the place anymore.

He and Steve are down in the kitchen scrounging up celebratory snacks and beers - Steve has a clean bill of health, and Eddie's stitches are coming out in a few days - when the phone rings.

"Harrington residence, this is Steve speaking," he greets.

Eddie barely has time to decide he's absolutely going to tease him about that later when the response comes - loud enough for him to hear it.

"Steven, my boy!" the voice booms, spirited and affable.

Steve closes his eyes, the muscles in his jaw tightening. "Hi, Dad."

"We just heard the news!" Steve's father says. "Why didn't you call to tell us? Did the earthquake damage anything?"

Part of Eddie thinks he should leave. Or at least back away, so he can't hear everything that's being said - but the other part of him thinks that Steve'd push him away if he didn't want him here, and with how tense Steve's gone next to him, Eddie can't bring himself to pull away.

"The house is fine," Steve says. "Loch Nora didn't get hit at all."

"Good, good," Mr. Harrington says. "Your mother hears you and Rachel have been volunteering with the relief efforts?"

Eddie didn't think it was possible, but Steve goes even stiffer.

"Robin," he corrects, his tone smooth and entirely void of inflection. "Yes, we've been coordinating donations."

"That's what I want to hear!" There's a sound like a loud clap. "I'm glad to see you're taking this seriously. You had a lot of ground to make up for, but it seems giving you a dose of reality has paid off. We'll be able to have some real talks about your future soon. What? Oh, your mother wants to talk to you."

There's a shuffling noise, then a quieter and much less friendly voice greets, "Steven."

"Hey Mom," Steve's posture relaxes a little. "I told Dad we made it out okay."

There's some kind of response, but Steve's mom is too quiet for Eddie to make it out.

"No, of course I didn't file charges. I knew you'd want to handle it if anything else happened." A pause. "Yes, that Carver. Mom, it's not - yeah. Yeah, okay. No, it's just him. I think he's just mad that people listened to me and not him. Yeah, I - all right. Bye."

He hangs up the phone, leaning in with one arm braced against the wall, a long line of tension.

"Steve?" Eddie says quietly.

Steve turns to face him, giving a little crooked smile. "You can ask if you want. I don't mind you and Robin knowing. It's… easier sometimes, if she expects it, and it's probably the same with you."

Eddie aches a little. "What was your dad talking about? What ground to make up for?"

Steve makes a face. "I did a lot of damage to the Harrington image the last bit of high school, you know. Stopped caring about my reputation, didn't get accepted into any of the colleges they wanted me to go to, kept getting into fights."

"But that wasn't - did they even ask you what actually happened?" Eddie asks.

"They don't care what actually happened," Steve replies. "Just what it looked like. Like I said, it's all about appearances with them. My dad's the main reason I worked at Scoops instead of being a lifeguard again last summer - he says it's because I needed a real life experience, learn what it means to work at the bottom, but he was just pissy and trying to humiliate me. He talks a big game about working hard, but all he really cares about is how I make them look. Now that I've gotten good press twice, he's happy again."

Eddie's mouth opens, then closes, then opens again. "He didn't even ask if you were okay."

Steve shrugs. "I looked fine in the papers."

Right.

Appearances.

"Will you be mad at me if I punch your dad if I ever see him?" Eddie asks.

Steve laughs, a surprised little sound like he's startled by it. "No," he says. "But only if I get to punch yours for leaving you."

Oh.

If Eddie was thinking about it, he'd have moved slowly, making sure to telegraph what he was doing so he didn't startle Steve, but he reacts on instinct and pulls Steve into a hug.

Steve doesn't even flinch at the sudden motion. He just melts into it, letting Eddie wrap him up and hold him tightly. His arms come up to cross over Eddie's shoulder blades, the placement automatically mindful of his injuries in the way only someone who's bandaged them multiple times could be.

"Sometimes I wish they just wouldn't call at all," Steve admits, face buried in Eddie's neck. It comes out in a rush, like he hadn't really thought about it before he said it, but he's getting it out anyway. "That they'd just cut me out of their life, instead of stringing me along."

"Fuck them," Eddie says. "I've got you."

He can hear Steve swallow, and Steve hugs him tighter.

They stay like that for a long while, until Eddie finally pulls back.

"Hey," he says softly. "I'll get the food and stuff. Go upstairs and see Robin."

Steve looks uncertain. "You sure?"

Eddie hugs him one more time. "You've got two soulmates," he murmurs. "Let us take care of you a little, okay?"

Steve squeezes him tight, then lets go with a nod before heading upstairs.

Eddie dithers in the kitchen for a bit, taking an extra long time. Whatever his complicated feelings are, it doesn't bother him at all to give Steve and Robin some space like this.

They're talking when he comes back, which isn't a surprise, and he hears his own name as he gets closer to the bedroom. Eddie pauses, even though he shouldn't, listening through the cracked door. He'll feel worse about it later, probably, but right now the masochistic side of him can't resist the urge to know what they're saying about him.

"I want him so much, Robs," he hears Steve saying, low and soft like he's trying to be quiet.

"I know," Robin replies, her tone somehow managing to be both gentle and snarky at the same time. "It's kind of pathetic."

Steve lets out a muffled groan. "Not helping. I don't exactly have the greatest track record at being able to get over people! I thought, with my soulmate-"

He cuts off, and Eddie can't help the bubbling anger that springs up. Steve thought? Has he stopped for one second to think about how Eddie might feel, only ever having a platonic soulmate? Wanting him just as bad and not being able to have him, not being able to have anyone?

"-someone else?" Robin is saying, like she's reading his thoughts, and Eddie has to hold his breath as he makes sure he hadn't accidentally said that outloud.

"I don't want anyone else," Steve says miserably. "Just him. I think - I think it's always going to be him. Fuck, why does this have to be so complicated?"

There's a heavy, thick silence, and Eddie's anger simmers and crackles under his skin, the way it always does when there's a hefty mixing of guilt in it.

"Do you think-" Robin starts, then stops. "Do you wish-" She stops again, voice thick with emotion. "Would it be easier if we-"

"No," Steve says, cutting her off at the same time that Eddie realizes what she's probably trying to bring herself to ask.

There's the muffled sound of shuffling, quiet hitching breaths - probably the motions of Steve trying to reassure one of his soulmates that he wants her, and he imagines him gathering her close, pressing soft kisses anywhere he can reach, cutting off anything she tries to say with a deeper, fiercer kiss.

Eddie bites the inside of his cheek so hard he tastes copper to keep himself from making some kind of sound to give himself away. He hates that he doesn't know what he's feeling - hates that he thinks he's jealous of Robin just as much as he doesn't feel jealous of her, not really. He's jealous of the images he conjures when he thinks about them together, but he's never actually jealous when he's with them, when he watches them.

That reminder makes him shift, peeking through the cracked door so he can see them. They're sitting facing each other, legs all tangled together. One of Steve's hands is covering Robin's heart, and the other is curled around one of Robin's hands, pinning it to his chest over his own heart, and their foreheads are pressed together.

Something in Eddie settles in a way he can't explain, all thoughts of jealousy gone.

"There's no me without you," Steve is saying. "You're a part of me, Robs, I can't do this without either of you."

She says something too muffled for Eddie to make out.

"I'm happy. I really am, I promise. I love you, I love us, exactly the way we are. And with Eddie-"

Eddie leans forward, too desperate to know what he's going to say to worry about being caught.

"I don't need anything else other than just him. However I can have him. If it's never romantic, if this is us forever - it doesn't matter, not really. I just need you and him, and the kids, and I'm good."

There's silence, the two of them just completely wrapped up in each other, and fuck, Eddie - he thinks you know what, if this is it, if what he has is Steve and Robin and the kids forever, then he's good, too.

"I love you, Robin Buckley," Steve says. "In a way I never realized was possible, until you and that dumb kid showed up in my life and taught me that you don't have to do anything to earn someone's love. That sometimes, it's just unconditional."

Steve was sixteen when he fought his first demogorgon, Eddie remembers that. Which means he couldn't have been any younger than that when he started really spending any time with Dustin or Robin, which means - the same thing that Eddie went through when he first moved in with Uncle Wayne, the thing that was so impossible for him to believe at twelve, Steve wasn't shown until he was probably seventeen.

Fuck, his heart aches.

"Does Henderson know he was your first true love?" Robin asks, her voice a little wet, but obviously trying to make things a little lighter.

Steve laughs, the sound just a bit thick. "No, and he'd be insufferable if I told him."

There's the faint sting of a new lie being written on the back of his calf, and the second he registers it, he hears Robin's startled laughter. Eddie pulls back from the door, sucking in a deep breath and letting it out, trying to get himself back under control.

"Oh my God, Steve, you did tell him! When?"

He can hear Steve sputtering and deflecting, the sound of Robin smacking him and Steve scrambling - probably trying to avoid them - and if there was ever going to be a good time to announce his return after shamelessly listening in for too long, now is probably it.

Eddie pushes open the door, six pack under one arm and bags of popcorn and chips under the other as he shoots a hopefully only slightly manic grin at them. "What's Steve lying about now?"

"Nothing!" Steve says too quickly.

Sloppy, for him, considering Eddie knows how good Steve usually is at using sarcasm or half truths to avoid telling lies, so Eddie tosses the bag of popcorn at him.

He catches it easily, of course, but it means he's now vulnerable to Robin's attacks, and he has to swerve to avoid another slap to his shoulder.

"Steve's trying to pretend like we both didn't get that lie, too," Robin says.

Steve groans. "Fine, Jesus. It was back when we were waiting at the camper, and Dustin was upset. I told him that he was the first person who was ever just - there, in my life because he wanted to be, even after he didn't need me to fight demodogs. No one could ever replace him."

"You're such a sap, Steve," Eddie teases him as he comes to sit next to him and Robin.

"Shut up," Steve grumbles. "That's it, I'm picking the movie."

—

The next day, Lucas and Max swing by. Steve hauls a basketball stand out of the garage and sets it up in the driveway, and Eddie sits at the kitchen table, eating a bologna sandwich while he watches them play.

It's safer inside, where there's no one to see if he gets affected by Steve's tank top and shorts.

Or at least, he thought it was safer inside.

"Do you love Steve?" Max asks, plopping down beside him.

Eddie chokes on his Coke, and she stares at him unsympathetically until he manages to breathe again.

"He's my soulmate, so." Eddie shrugs.

Max gives him an unimpressed look, and yeah, okay, he figures they both know soulmates aren't a guarantee of anything. Eddie's parents were soulmates, after all, loved each other more than anything else in this world, and that still hadn't been enough.

"I wanted him to be my soulmate before I knew it was him," he admits, because that's a more true answer without actually having to say yes or no. "Nothing's happened since to change that."

She gets this look on her face like she's trying to decide if that's an acceptable response. After a moment, she rests her chin on her knees, staring out the window, and Eddie figures he's in the clear.

"Steve has two soulmates," she says after a while. "You don't. Doesn't that make you feel - I don't know, like you aren't enough?"

"Jesus Christ, Red, you're not pulling any punches today, are you?" Eddie swears.

He doesn't actually want to have this conversation. It's not something he's completely sorted out on his own, yet, even though he's done a lot of thinking on it, and he's tempted to tell her to mind her own business.

But she won't look at him, and he knows why she's asking. She's not talking about him and Steve and Robin, not really.

He thinks about telling her something standard about soulmates, or maybe even the advice that his uncle gave him, but it doesn't feel right.

"It's not what I always imagined," Eddie admits slowly.

Max doesn't say anything, but he watches the way she starts to unwind a little, how she doesn't hold herself so stiff, tilts a little to actually listen to what he's saying.

"You know Steve and I talked to each other when we were younger. We thought the same way about a lot of stuff, and I had this idea in my head that he was some little outcast like me, in another small town somewhere out there, that we'd move to a big city and find each other. But then we stopped talking."

"How come?" Max asks, looking caught up despite herself.

Eddie grins at her, wide and self depreciating. "I found out he was probably some rich, popular jerk, and decided I hated him."

And there's that unimpressed look again.

"Yeah, yeah," Eddie grumbles. "Let's just say there might be some truth to not talking with your soulmate before you actually meet them. Point is, for almost five years, I hated my soulmate. Thought the best I could hope for was that we'd meet when we were thirty and ancient, and maybe then he would have changed. Then a little while ago, I met Steve."

Max's brows furrow. "You met Steve way before that."

"Nah," he says. "I knew of Steve. I had a lot of assumptions about him, knew what I thought he was, but I didn't know the real Steve. That Steve I met when he helped explain all of this to me and didn't make me feel stupid for not picking up some of it right away, even after I held a broken bottle to his throat."

She snorts, but looks like she's considering that. "I met him when he was putting himself between me, Lucas, and Dustin and a hoard of demodogs, a couple of hours after calling them dickheads and me some random girl."

Eddie salutes her with his can of Coke, half in understanding and half to cover the way his heart wants to melt again. "That Steve was nothing like I imagined my soulmate to be, when I was daydreaming about him or hating him. But I knew I didn't want anyone else, and Steve having another soulmate doesn't change that. I don't think it makes what he feels for me any less than what I feel for him, and I don't think it means I'm less important to him than he is to me."

Max frowns. "Really, or are you just saying that?"

"Really," Eddie says, though he hadn't actually been sure it was true until he heard himself say it. "I'm not saying it's not hard sometimes. And sometimes I get in my head about it. But I wouldn't change it. Steve wouldn't be the same without Robin, you know? He wouldn't be the Steve that made me want him to be my soulmate so bad."

There's a long moment of silence. Then, "Would you be saying that if both of his soulmates were romantic?"

Eddie's glad he stopped drinking, because he knows he would have choked again. For a split second, she wonders if she's picked up on - but no, that still isn't what this about. "Are both of yours romantic?"

Her jaw juts forward, arms hugging tighter around her knees. "What if they were?"

Fuck, he doesn't know what to say to that. "It's okay to like both guys and girls," he says, because he feels like that's the most important bit. "I do. I mean, mostly guys, but sometimes girls."

Her grip loosens a little, but she still doesn't say anything.

"It sounds like maybe I'm not the one you should be talking to about that," he says carefully.

She scowls. "I talked to Steve already."

Right, of course she did.

"What did Steve say?"

"Steve said he thinks the line between platonic and romantic soulmates isn't as straightforward as people like to pretend it is. That sometimes what you might think should be romantic is actually platonic, and sometimes what you think should be platonic is romantic, and sometimes there's going to be things that blur the lines and you don't really know which one it is. He said it was okay to have two platonic or two romantic or one of each or, like, any combination." She makes a face here, like she's not entirely sure what he meant by any combination - or like she was sure, and didn't need that much detail. "That as long as everyone was communicating, it was okay to do whatever worked for us."

Eddie swallows. "Steve sounds pretty smart."

Max rolls her eyes. "He has his moments."

"So… are you communicating with Lucas and El?" he asks.

She picks at a rip in her jeans. "I talked to Lucas."

He waits, but it seems like that's all he's going to get. He starts to ask what Lucas said, but… he gets the feeling that it's not necessarily about what he said or not.

"But it's Lucas," Eddie says. "And you wanted to hear how someone else in a familiar situation felt."

Eddie gets that familiar, itchy feeling that he does when he wants to run, and he only barely resists the urge to bounce his leg up and down. It's not that he wants to run from Max, or even from this conversation, it's just - it's starting to make him think about things, and he really, really doesn't want an audience for this. He wants to lock himself in a room and pace, listen to some music, maybe scribble out his thoughts, something to get his hands moving and his brain in some kind of order -

"Even if Steve wanted both of us romantically," he says, knowing it's close enough that it's not a lie. "I would still rather be his soulmate than anyone else."

Max looks at him with narrowed eyes for a long moment. "I'm gonna ask Steve if you lied about that."

Eddie fixes her with an unimpressed look right back. "You think I'd do that to him?"

"You better not." There's an edge of menace in her tone, but she lets it go, so Eddie figures she doesn't really think he'd lie about something like that knowing it would be etched on Steve's skin forever.

Silence stretches between them, and Eddie follows her gaze out the window, watching Steve and Lucas playing basketball.

"I've put him through so much already," Max says, so quietly that he can barely hear it.

Fuck, Eddie is so fucking soft for these kids.

"You have not," Eddie says immediately. "You haven't done a goddamn thing, Red. Both of you have already been through so much, and it's not because of something either of you did. It's fucking Hawkins."

She doesn't look convinced, so Eddie pushes his shoulder against hers.

"Lucas is smart. He's more emotionally intelligent than I am-" Max snorts at him, and he's reasonably sure he hears her mutter something along the lines of like that's hard, but he ignores her. "He knows what he can take and what he can't. All you have to do is believe him when he tells you it."

She's quiet for a moment, looking contemplative. Then she asks, "Does that work for you?"

Right, yeah, okay, he deserved that one. He thinks about deflecting, but -

"I'm trying," he admits quietly. "What do you think, huh, you gonna let me beat you there or are we gonna do this together?"

Max glances out the window again, then turns to look back at him, her chin jutting out. "Steve loves too much, and he gets it thrown back at him too often. I don't think he really believes that we love him as much as he loves us, even though we do."

She says it like a threat, like she's saying if you tell him I said that I will kill you or maybe if you hurt him I will kill you. Either way, he'd be dead.

"I'll talk to Lucas and El, and you make sure you don't disappoint him."

Goddamn if that doesn't stab right to the heart of him, lodging itself beneath his ribcage and sticking right into the parts that'd already made him want to run from this conversation.

"Okay," he manages to get out, because he's not sure he'll survive any other answer.

Max nods. "Good talk," she tells him, and then she pushes herself up and she's gone.

Eddie stays there, mulling all of that over. He doesn't think she'd actually tell Steve anything they just talked about, nor does he think she really has any idea that Steve had asked him to make their bond romantic and he'd turned him down. Honestly, Eddie could probably get away with patting himself on the back for actually managing to give some decent advice and be the person she'd needed him to be for just a little while, then go on being a very devoted platonic soulmate for Steve.

Except even if Max doesn't really know, Eddie does. And now Eddie's thinking about things he doesn't want to, and wondering how much of a hypocrite some of the advice that he gave her makes him, and -

"Hey," Lucas says, and Eddie yelps.

Lucas raises his eyebrows at him.

"Jesus Christ, don't do that," Eddie bitches.

There's a little smirk, but fortunately, Lucas doesn't actually comment on it. "You talk to Max?" he asks instead.

"Yeah," Eddie replies, narrowing his eyes at him.

Lucas lights up, though, his whole face practically beaming with his smile. "Good. I figured it'd help her to hear that your soulmate cares about you no matter what from someone who wasn't me."

Eddie raises one eyebrow. "How do you know that's what I said?"

Lucas rolls his eyes. "Because you're Steve's soulmate. If that wasn't the way you felt, Robin would know, and she'd have already murdered you."

Eddie considers that. "Okay, fair."

Lucas makes his way over to the fridge, yanking it open and standing in front of it as he peers in. "So what did you tell her?"

Eddie sits back, waiting until Lucas turns to look back at him so he can shoot him a wide, smug grin. "If she wants you to know, she'll tell you."

He gets a glare in return, but Lucas doesn't protest that, just leans back in to grab a pair of Gatorades from the fridge. He twists the top off of one, taking a long swallow before he shuts the door and starts back out of the kitchen, giving him a little nod as he passes.

"Hey, Lucas?" Eddie calls before he can leave.

Lucas pauses, looking quizzically at him.

"I'm guessing you talk to Steve like Max does, about all this." Eddie makes an exaggerated gesture between them and out the kitchen window, meant to loop all of them in together. "But, uh. You know. If you ever want a different perspective, from someone in kind of your position."

He motions to himself, then splays his hands out all ta-da.

Lucas hesitates, lingering in the middle of the kitchen before he seems to make a decision.

"I was kind of upset about it when I first found out Max's other soulmate was El," he admits. "It was right after Billy died, and their soulmate bond was new, and Max kept letting El in while she was shutting me out. And I was angry, and jealous, and then when El had to leave and Max kept pushing me away, I just kept thinking that if El was here Max wouldn't be by herself so much, that the wrong soulmate got to stay in Hawkins."

Lucas pauses, twisting the Gatorades in his hand, but Eddie gets the feeling it's a gathering his thoughts pause more than a waiting for Eddie to say something pause.

"Eventually I realized that El could help Max in a way that I couldn't, and that maybe that was the point. I started calling El a little, too, when the phone wasn't busy, and just - El was grieving, too. I didn't want to feel jealous over something that helped them both anymore. It's been good with El back, really good. I don't know if I like El like that, but if Max does-" he shrugs. "I guess I kind of already got over the jealousy bit. It doesn't really matter to me if they kiss while they're having sleepovers or not, as long as they don't exclude me."

Now it seems like a waiting for Eddie to say something pause, so he gives a soft little hum. "What do you do if you end up feeling excluded?"

Lucas blinks, like he wasn't expecting that question. "Uh. Well, before, I talked to my parents and sometimes to Steve or Robin or Dustin. It's hard talking to Mike or Will about it because they're not all that objective about El stuff. I don't… really know if I want to tell my parents about Max and El like that yet, so I guess… talk to Steve or Robin or Dustin." He pauses, then, more tentatively, "Or you?"

Fuck, these kids keep getting to him. "Or me," he agrees easily. "But you should probably also add talk to Max and El to that list."

Lucas makes a face, but doesn't disagree. "I don't think a lot of the others know about Max," he says instead. "Just me and Steve and Robin, and now you."

There's an edge to his voice, like he's pretty sure Eddie must be safe if Max told him, but he's ready to fight him about it anyway.

"Max knows about me, now, so we're even," Eddie replies, pleased that the effort he puts into making sure his voice sounds steady pays off.

"Yeah?" Lucas asks. "Who else knows?"

"Steve and Robin. And now Max and you," Eddie replies.

Lucas lights up a little. "Cool."

"Cool," Eddie echoes, even though he feels a little shaky from the fact that he's now said it twice today, which is double the amount of times he's ever said it before at all.

There's a comfortable silence for a moment.

"It's complicated, being in our position," Eddie says after a bit. "I think it's always going to be complicated. But if we let it - I think it could be really great, too. Most people only end up in pairs, but us? We get a whole damn party of interconnected soulmates."

"A party of soulmates," Lucas says thoughtfully, then grins. "Yeah, I like that."

"You're a good kid, Lucas," Eddie tells him, not sure if he really needs to hear it, but he still remembers the way it made him feel when Uncle Wayne said it.

Lucas ducks his head, looking a little pleased, even though he follows it up with a sidelong look. "Even though I'm kind of a jock?"

Eddie shrugs. "My soulmate is a whole jock. I guess that means I've got a little jock in me, too."

Lucas's expression shifts, turning mischievous, and suddenly he looks like the fifteen year old boy he is, and not a world-weary adult. It's nice, it's wonderful, Eddie loves to see it, except it makes him realize what he just said far, far too late to do anything about it.

In his defense, they were having a serious discussion, and -

Yeah, he's got nothing.

Maybe it'll be fine? Lucas is probably the most mature out of all of the boys, maybe -

"I don't know, man," Lucas says, slowly, like he's actually considering that. "We've all heard the rumors about Steve. I don't think it's something little you're gonna be dealing with."

Eddie gapes at him.

"I said you were mature," he bemoans, flinging his upper body over the top of the kitchen table just to make Lucas laugh harder. "I told Max you were emotionally intelligent! Begone from my sight!"

Lucas takes his Gatorades and leaves, still laughing at him.

—

"Max cornered me in the kitchen to threaten me today," Eddie says.

Steve snorts. "Of course she did. What about?"

Eddie shrugs, waiting for Steve to look at him so he can waggle his eyebrows at him. "She also threatened to kill me if I told you."

Steve shoves him, and Eddie falls back dramatically, sprawling out on the couch. He props himself up on his elbows to look at Steve, but he doesn't seem inclined to actually push him to reveal what he and Max talked about. Instead, Steve goes about shutting down for the night, checking to make sure all the windows and the sliding glass door are locked.

"Soulmate stuff," Eddie says. Or more like blurts out, before he can change his mind, to force himself to have to keep going. "She told me what you said about the line between platonic and romantic soulmates. Made me think about some things."

"Yeah?" Steve asks, stopping by the couch to look at him.

"Do you still want me, Steve?" Eddie asks, his heart in his throat.

He isn't prepared for Steve to shut down, for the way his face goes cold and hard and blank.

"Not cool, Eddie," Steve says, turning away and going back to the windows in the living room.

Eddie pushes himself up off the couch, then immediately doubts himself and sits back down. "Steve, what?"

Steve won't look at him, and he can hear the window locks rattling with the force that Steve's using to check them. "You're being a dick, man, come on. You can't ask me stuff like that."

"I-" he starts, then stops, his mind scrambling a little. Is he too late? Did Steve move on already, even though he told Robin that he wasn't going to? Is Eddie so easy to get over that even his fucking soulmate couldn't keep him? "What happened to it's always going to be him, huh?"

"Jesus Christ," Steve says, incredulous, and Eddie kind of wants to cry a little because he knows that Steve has started saying that more because of all the time they've spent together. "You were listening to me and Robin? What the fuck, man, you still think it's fair to throw that at me?"

"Fuck you, Steve, I know it wasn't a lie when you said that. Am I so fucking easy to just stop wanting, or are you that fucking fickle?"

"Eddie, goddamn, is this - were you testing me? Is this you lashing out at me again? Because I can't, okay, not about this, I can't-" he cuts off, one hand scrubbing over his face. "I told you, I can't."

Oh.

Oh fuck.

"Steve, no, I wasn't teasing, I - it was a real question."

Steve stills, pausing right by a window. The light of the moon catches on him, highlighting parts of him in pale silver while the rest of him is warmed from the soft yellow of the living room lamp. "Seriously?"

"Come on, Steve. I just picked a fight with you instead of asking what you meant, and you're surprised I'm not sure you still want me anymore?"

Eddie can hear Steve breathing out, then in, then back out again, watches as he lets some of the tension bleed out of his body. "I think I picked some of that fight right back. I'm sorry, I just - all right, let's go back, and I'll listen without making assumptions, okay?"

Yeah, okay, Eddie can do that.

"Max told me what you said," Eddie starts again. "And it made me think about how smart you are." He wishes Steve were closer, so he could see his face better, at the same time as he wishes he couldn't see it at all. "How brave you are. How when you know what you want, you go for it, how you fight to keep it, how you own up when you make a mistake, how you work so hard to make all this work."

This is Eddie trying to be brave, he thinks. Trying to go for what he wants, to accept that they're going to have to work at this, that he's probably going to get hurt, that he has to trust that Steve will be willing to work past whatever it is that springs up.

It takes him a little too long, though, because after a few moments, Steve gently prompts, "Eddie?"

"Do you still want me?" he asks again. He didn't mean to, but it comes out anyway, all small and tentative.

"Eds," Steve breathes out. "I'm always going to want you."

He loves too much, and he gets it thrown back at him too often, Max had said, and Eddie swallows down the urge to ask him if he means it, if he'll still mean it the next time Eddie picks a fight, or every time he's an ass.

"I'm always going to want you, too," Eddie says.

Steve's hands twitch, and he looks like he's waiting for something - for a lie to show up on his skin, Eddie realizes, and Eddie knows he's going to have to do better than that.

"I want you," he says again. "Steve, I want you. I'll take you any way I can get you, but I just - this is stupid, I'm stupid. I'm making us both miserable because I was scared."

He's not surprised that's what gets Steve moving, and he comes over to sit by him on the couch.

"You're not stupid," Steve replies. "Not for being scared."

Eddie shakes his head. "No, but I am for giving into it. So I might get hurt, so what? I'm already hurting, wanting you so bad and not getting to have you, knowing you'd probably let me kiss you and not letting myself go for it."

Steve's looking at him, eyes all sharp and intense, like he's really listening to Eddie's every word, and hell if it doesn't make him feel just a little bit drunk on it.

"Talking with Max made me realize that I trust you. I trust you, with my life, with - fucking everything. I trust you to work through this with me, to figure out what works for us."

Steve runs a hand over his jaw, going up to pinch the bridge of his nose. "Yeah?" he asks after a moment. "You really - you want to do this?"

"So fucking much," Eddie says.

Steve's whole face lights up in a smile, and he leans in, one hand resting on Eddie's knee. "That mean I can kiss you now?"

Eddie barely manages to get out a please before Steve's other hand is sliding over his jaw, slipping back to push his fingers into his hair and cup the side of his face. Steve holds him there as he kisses him, and it's-

It's not Eddie's first kiss. But it's his first kiss that's ever really meant anything, and the soft brush of Steve's lips against his makes his heart stutter in his chest.

Steve gives a little hum, low in his throat, and then he's tilting his head to get a better angle, and holy shit.

Eddie pushes forward eagerly, deepening the kiss until they're both panting for breath, and even then they don't pull away. Their foreheads press together, lips parted and just barely touching as they share the same air. His eyes have closed at some point, but now he opens them to find Steve looking back at him, and Eddie smiles.

"How long do you think until Robin notices we haven't come up?" he asks.

"I'm okay with figuring that out," Steve replies, closing the tiny bit of distance between them to kiss him again.

I've got a pretty good handle on the outline for the rest of this now, so I'd say we've got about four more parts left!

-----

Part 24

Tag list (always happy to add more): @vampireinthesun @koibug @estrellami-1 @mentalcyborg @allbimyself26 @questionablequeeries @the-s-is-silent @whimsicalwitchm @a-gae-af-racoon @tinyplanet95 @n0-1-important @velocitytimes2 @swimmingbirdrunningrock @newtstabber @jcmadgirl @roblingoblin285 @lexyvey @paperbackribs @goodolefashionedloverboi @evix-syne666 @raisedbylibrarians @stxrcrossed186 @nightmareglitter @greekgeek24 @starman-jpg @crazyhatlady86 @imfinereallyy @manda-panda-monium @deleataecount @prideandsensibility @chaoticvictorianspirit @maydillydally @disrespectedgoatman @scarlet-malfoy @i-less-than-three-you @hbyrde36 @hallucinatedjosten @dragonsandgayships @arepaconchocolate @g4ys0n @novelnovella @bisexualdisastersworld @ghostofyourvampiregf @scarletyeager @pettrichore @nerd-and-nervous @hiimlevi @queenie-ofthe-void @cinnamon-mushroomabomination

[givehimthemedicine]

wait are there elmax / elumax shippers on here who really actually think it could happen in reality? not "lol it's canon to me" but actually onscreen other-people-can-see-it-too real shit? poll time:

A) I believe elmax WILL be explicitly endgame / confirmed by the writers B) I believe elumax WILL be explicitly endgame / confirmed by the writers C) I think implied-elmax has a real shot. It'd probably just look like a big focus on El and Max's friendship, and will go down in history that way, but the writers mean for some of us to see the truth D) I think implied-elumax has a real shot. It would probably just look like lumax + El being framed as a trio, and it'll go down in history as just lumax, but the writers mean for some of us to see the truth E) I assume lumax will be endgame, but I really think elmax/elumax would work better for the story. the writers just won't do it because they're cowards. F) elmax / elumax is just for fun in my head, it doesn't work in the canon. I know lumax is endgame. G) I think Lucas Max and El will all end the show single, focused on friendship, with the writers not meaning to hint at any romantic combination. H) very specific scenario I'll explain I) I don't ship this I just want to see how insane you people are

and ofc please elaborate in comments or rbs or whatever if you have strong opinions

[steddie-fanfic-recs]

Tell Me Sweet Little Lies

by brbsoulnomming

Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationship: Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson, Robin Buckley & Steve Harrington, Robin Buckley & Eddie Munson, Steve Harrington & The Party, Eddie Munson & The Party, Eddie Munson & Wayne Munson, Maxine "Max" Mayfield/Lucas Sinclair, Robin Buckley & Steve Harrington & Eddie Munson Character: Eddie Munson, Steve Harrington, Wayne Munson, Robin Buckley, Lucas Sinclair, Maxine "Max" Mayfield, Dustin Henderson, Nancy Wheeler, Erica Sinclair, Mike Wheeler, Will Byers, Eleven | Jane Hopper, Jonathan Byers, Argyle (Stranger Things), Jim "Chief" Hopper, Jason Carver, Joyce Byers Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Platonic Soulmates Robin Buckley & Steve Harrington, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Angst with a Happy Ending, Mild Angst, Mutual Pining, Found Family, Slow Burn, reference to canon-typical violence, all ships except steddie are mostly in the background, POV Eddie Munson, Hurt/Comfort, Steve Harrington Takes Care of Eddie Munson, Sharing a Bed, Nightmares, Misunderstandings, The Party Loves Steve Harrington, Eddie Munson Has PTSD, Steve Harrington Has PTSD, Steve Harrington Loves The Party, The Party Loves Eddie Munson, Steve and Robin have no boundaries, Hints of elmax and elumax Words: 99,510 Chapters: 26/26

Summary

The summer of '80, a few weeks before he's due to start high school, Eddie gets I don't think of you all that often anyway, and his heart jumps. He knows it's not directed at him. It can't be - it's one of the hardfast rules. Lies of omission don't count, half truths don't count, joking usually doesn't count, and it only counts if you're saying the lie to someone, not just telling yourself. So whoever his soulmate is talking to - they do think about this person often, even if they feel like they have to pretend they don't. But it gives Eddie an idea. ---- A soulmate AU where the lies you say get inked onto your soulmate's skin, featuring romantic and platonic soulmates - or, Eddie's journey in finding his soulmate and letting himself be worked into the found family that is the Party.

[scissorsxluvv]

📌 °❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ INTRODUCION POST °❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

❝ she rules her life like a bird in light and who will be her lover? ❞

┊ ┊ ┊ ┊ ┊ ┊

┊ ┊ ┊ ┊ ˚★⋆｡˚ ⋆

┊ ┊ ┊ ⋆

┊ ┊ ★⋆

┊ ◦ ┊ . ˚

★⋆ ˚★

❝ I never really got there, I just pretended that I have. words are blunt instruments, words are sawed off shotguns.❞

𓏲๋࣭࣪˖🪼⋆˚｡ ELLIE / EL. 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝⭒˚｡⋆

｡𖦹.˚ all pronouns are fine but I prefer they/them in english and she or they in my native (polish)!!

｡𖦹.˚ genderfluid lesbian.

｡𖦹.˚ isfp/infp. sx/so 4w3. choleric-melancholic.

｡𖦹.˚ autistic + adhd.

｡𖦹.˚ I'm a minor!!! so pls don't be weird ://

｡𖦹.˚ polish, but I mostly speak and post in english

𓏲๋࣭࣪˖🪼⋆˚｡ my kins!!! (amanda and misty day are the heaviest, cut me in half and you'll see these two)

↑[misty day (ahs coven), amanda young (saw), misty quigley (yellowjackets), nancy wheeler (stranger things), cassie ainsworth (skins gen 1), jade west (victorious)]

❝ the cure for death itself? the answer is — immortality.❞

𓏲๋࣭࣪˖🪼⋆˚｡ FANDOMS: stranger things. saw franchise. american horror story. yellowjackets. the last of us. dead poets society. agatha all along. agent carter. black widow. marvel. shadowhunters universe. the hunger games. harry potter. marauders era. komisarz alex. star wars. f1. descendants. greek mythology. the conjuring franchise. gravity falls. castle. arcane. heathers. hamilton. carrie the musical. (and many, MANY more...) [the bold ones are my special interest/I'm most active in them]

𓏲๋࣭࣪˖🪼⋆˚｡ MUSIC: lana del rey. lorde. stevie nicks. fleetwood mac. big thief. adrianne lenker. mitski. marina. the dresden dolls. lady gaga. chappell roan. taylor swift. radiohead. mother mother. the nbhd. panic! at the disco. myslovitz. daria zawialow. fiona apple. fydolla ho. mazzy star. musicals' soundtracks. rock. old music.

𓏲๋࣭࣪˖🪼⋆˚｡ MY FAV SHIPS AND HCS FROM STRANGER THINGS (as some might be controversial or rare):

｡𖦹.˚ joyren!!!! I'm the biggest joyren stan in the world. ronance!!!! byler/miwi. elmax. elumax. jancy. mileven. mucas/lumax. steddie. hopclair. nancy x barb. one-sided stommy. platonic elmike. platonic stobin. platonic jopper. platonic stancy. platonic madwheeler. platonic madwise. platonic willel. [bold ones are my favorite/what I'd love as endgame (abt romantic ships), but I wouldn't mind the rest as endgame!!]

｡𖦹.˚ lesbian karen wheeler!!!! bisexual and genderfluid (she/he) nancy wheeler. bisexual mike wheeler. bisexual joyce byers. (these are my main ships, the rest of sexuality hcs are here) audhd robin buckley. autism spectrum nancy wheeler. nancy's favorite song being total eclipse of the heart by bonnie tyler. karen wheeler is alice creel theory!!!!

𓏲๋࣭࣪˖🪼⋆˚｡ MY FAV SHIPS AND HCS FROM SAW :

｡𖦹.˚ lynnmanda/shotgunshipping. pintshipping. chainshipping. john and jill. hoffstrahm/coffinshipping. eric and kerry. platonic daniel and amanda. platonic rockstarshipping. platonic strahm and perez.

｡𖦹.˚ autistic amanda. (not saying she doesn't have bpd, she's just autistic coded too and I relate to her the most) alcoholic brit (pre-trap). mallick's scars being also sh (it's hinted in saw v). brit and mallick living together after saw v. jill being a mother figure for amanda. amanda and adam knowing eachother more before she kidnapped him for the trap. I think the sexuality headcanons from saw are mostly the same for everyone tbh

𓏲๋࣭࣪˖🪼⋆˚｡ SOME FUNFACTS ABOUT ME:

｡𖦹.˚ I want to be a cop (homicide/criminal department)

｡𖦹.˚ I'm a theatre kid lol (as if you couldn't tell)

｡𖦹.˚ my favorite animals are jellyfishes and cats

｡𖦹.˚ I dress in a witchy, hippie, whimsy, vintage style, idek how to name it (my biggest inspirations are stevie nicks and misty day)

｡𖦹.˚ my absolute favorite song is most likely jigsaw falling into place by radiohead

𓏲๋࣭࣪˖🪼⋆˚｡ MY SOCIALS :

｡𖦹.˚ ao3: scissorsxluvv

｡𖦹.˚ wattpad: bird_in_flight

｡𖦹.˚ tt editing acc: scissorsxluvv_

｡𖦹.˚ tt main acc: _bird_in_flight

｡𖦹.˚ side blog: ultrawhimsyviolence

𓏲๋࣭࣪˖🪼⋆˚｡ and here's me!! :33

❝ turn around, bright eyes.❞

(some me core songs :33)

[antisociallilbrat]

Come Back To Me

Read on Ao3

Summary: "A voice ripples through the void, waking her from whatever she’s doing. How can she sleep if could be dead?

It’s muffled as if it’s underwater. It’s impossible to make out what it’s saying but she thinks the voice is saying the same thing over and over. It’s far away and if she could get to it she would but she can’t move without a body.

Ultimately the voice drips off. She doesn’t know if she’s supposed to miss it or not."

-

Or I made an Elmax fic where Max is trapped in her coma and El never stops calling out to her.

Warnings: Nothing much but there is brief idolization of d*ath

Everything is quiet. The silence is permeating, seeping into everything. Soaking through the darkness. And it is cold, so, so cold.

It feels like she’s floating through nothing. Her body feels the weight of the crushing void and yet nothing at all. Does she have a body? She can't remember anymore. Much less remember her name.

Is she someone? Was she ever someone? 

When she first arrived here she was frightened. The fear felt like the only thing real here and she clung to it. Until that eventually ebbed away into nothingness. Being consumed by the void. 

That was at the beginning. Although she doesn’t know much time has passed since she arrived here. Time no longer has meaning and now she just feels nothing. Maybe she belongs here.

Preposterously could she equate this place- feeling? to peace. Being that she must be dead. How else to explain this? 

But… is she dead? Being dead would mean that she was someone and she doesn’t feel like she’s ever existed.

-

A voice ripples through the void, waking her from whatever she’s doing. How can she sleep if could be dead? 

It’s muffled as if it’s underwater. It’s impossible to make out what it’s saying but she thinks the voice is saying the same thing over and over. It’s far away and if she could get to it she would but she can’t move without a body. 

Ultimately the voice drips off. She doesn’t know if she’s supposed to miss it or not.

-

The next time the voice comes it’s different. It’s urgent and desperate. It hits her like a tidal wave.

As if she was resting on the shore and a wave came in, dragging her under. Has she ever been to the beach? Why does this feel familiar? It’s still not possible to make out what the voice is saying as she gets trapped under the wave of it. 

For the first time, she realizes she does have a body and she trashes against the current. It’s useless. It’s drowning her but she smiles. This isn’t nothingness. 

This time she mourns the voice after it leaves.

-

She would say that the voice doesn’t visit for a while but truly she doesn’t know. It feels like a long time. What a funny thing! To delude herself into thinking she can feel the passage of time.

The realization that she has a body gives her a sort of refuge in the meantime. Ten fingers and ten toes. Red hair that she can’t stop herself from touching. The simple act of doing this brings a burst of laughter bubbling up from her core but she can’t hear it. Any joy gets snuffed out in the blackness.

There are flashes now. Flashes of a life she thinks is hers but she can’t be sure.

It’s all disjointed and out of place. Broken into bits and pieces. If she focuses on one too hard it melts away and she can’t get her mind to retrieve it. There’s a smell of a perfume. There’s a noise of indistinct hard words, always with the smell of leather and cigarette smoke. The good and the bad ones blend, not quite indistinguishable. 

Her favorite flash has to be a good one, she just knows it. It’s a sense of warmness and it feels foreign in the frost around her. The feeling is always paired with a streak of tender honey eyes.

-

The voice returns and this time she runs toward it. By the account of the fact that the voice has given her back her name. Max.

“It’s Max, not Maxine. No one calls me that.”

The voice is one of a another girl and she anguishedly calls out for her, “Max! Are you here?! Max?!” 

Yes! Yes, she’s here! Her name is Max and she is here! Dear God, she is here!

She scours the void looking for the girl calling out for her but it’s like the voice is coming from every direction. She can’t make heads or tails of where it’s coming from. 

“Max! Please! I need you to answer me! Max!” The girl’s voice is fading.

No! No! No! Don’t leave! Not yet! Max screams out to the girl but nothing comes out. Oh her chest is tight and she can feel herself breaking. Please don’t let the voice leave her yet.

But the void is not kind and Max collapses in on herself when the deafening silence returns. 

-

The flashes keep coming to her. More distinct now. 

There’s her mother and shades of California. There’s Dustin flashing off his new teeth. Mike and his pouty face. There’s Lucas…and his tenderness. His warm, infectious kindness. He never gave up on her. Not even after she tried to run him off after Billy died.

Billy who- no, don’t think of that. Don’t think of him here. This cold place gives the flashes of him power. 

But the girl who calls out for her, she's not sure who she is. There are a few flashes of a girl with honey eyes and she thinks that it has to be her but how could she know? What’s her name? Why does she come here? Does she do so to find her or is she here to torment her? 

No, this girl is kind. She remembers that much. She’s special. 

Snowball dance, empty dance floor, and glitter banners, “Touch her again and I’ll kill you again.”, piggyback from a pizza freezer, number one.

None of it makes sense. It hounds her to scream into the void. What happened to her?! Why is she here?! What did she ever do to deserve this?! She aches to hear the sound of her screams, the depths still keep her silenced. 

-

“Max?! Are you there?!”

The girl’s voice booms through the void and this time Max takes off running. 

It still circles her, coming from all directions but this time, oh this time it’s slightly louder from one way. She follows it eagerly, pulling at it like a string. 

“Max! Please!” 

She’s here! She’s here! She’s here!

The voice grows louder and louder and starts to single out into one line, coming from one direction. Right in front of her. The voice is so tangible she can almost taste it. 

It’s quiet then, too quiet, and right as she's starting to fear it’s too late when she sees her.

The girl kneels on a slate of blackness, face in her hands. She’s dressed in a black hoodie and jogging pants. Both of them are too big for her. Her hair must’ve been shaved but it’s grown. Wisps of hair growing out of her skull twist and turn, ready to curl but not long enough to do so. 

She doesn’t fully remember this girl but she misses her. Who is she?

There’s no way to know if the girl looks up from her hands because she senses Max’s presence but she’d like to think so. But when they make eye contact, her red-rimmed eyes look through her. 

“Max? …Are you there?” 

Yes! She’s here! She tries to tell her but she still can’t fucking speak! 

The girl stands, looking around, “Max if you’re here please tell me!”

This poor girl looks worn. Her face is aged from grief and her eyes are lifeless. This isn’t how she remembers her. No, she could swear she recalls her filled tickling curiosity about the world around her and the way her eyes would light up in amusement over the simplest things. The girl she remembers was a girl who was not sure who she was but was eager to see who she could be. She’s special. 

The girl calls out to her again, “Max please answer me,” how can a girl so young look so defeated?

Max doesn’t stop trying to call out for her, she’s standing right in front of her but the girl doesn’t see her. Eventually, she walks through Max.

El. Eleven. The party’s madge. The chief police’s adopted daughter. Max’s friend. Max’s first true girl friend. 

El spins on her heel to face her, warily looking at her, “...Max?” El holds out her hand and hesitantly Max lets her fingers phase through it. 

The smile El gives her is worth it, eyes gleaming with tears, happy tears, and her bottom lip trembles, “Max, I knew you were here.”

-

El visits her. As much as she can. Apparently, wherever is not here has been keeping her busy. 

They sit together in the darkness. Max ghosts her hand over El’s to let her know she’s here. She likes it when El tells her what’s happening in the not here. 

An outside world that has sunshine and that warmth Max misses so much. In the void, she only gets glimpses of warmth and they always have something to do with El. 

It’s hard to think about how she had a life outside of the void. The icy darkness feels like it’s all she’s ever known. It’s a part of her now. There’s no going back.

There’s no way for her to tell El this and she desperately wishes she could. She feels like El would understand. 

El tells her about Hop being back. About how Dustin has been struggling lately but El had made sure someone was there for him. Will and Johnathan have been great to her and accepted her into their little family. Curiously she doesn’t talk about Mike. Which is…strange. Mike was important to El but she can’t remember why. Which makes it odd that El hasn’t mentioned him. 

Her favorite is when El talks about Lucas. His sister, Erica, has been there for him and is making sure he’s taking care of himself. El tends to be vague where Lucas is concerned besides that. Max is grateful. She knows Lucas is not okay and it’s her fault. 

There was a fallout in the not here, something that has destroyed Hawkins. God, she hadn’t heard that name in a while. That same something that is the reason why Max is here.

On that too El remains vague. Just mainly reassures Max that everyone is safe. That’s okay, Max doesn’t want to remember what put her here. Who put her here.

-

Time goes on. El’s hair grows, curling around her face. Max thinks it’s adorable.

There are more voices. These are different from El’s when she first appeared. These are outside the void, from the not here. She doesn’t recognize them but El tells her they belong to Lucas, sometimes Dustin, and rarely, Mike and Will. Even though she can’t make out what they’re saying, it feels good to hear them.

There’s been some other…developments too. 

Max gets pains. In one of her arms and both of her legs. It feels like her bones are splintering. Twisting and cracking. She would shriek in angony if she could.

When they hit her in waves, it makes her wish for the time she felt nothing. When the void absorbed everything. She knows what El is not telling her, it’s that something is wrong with her physical body. Someone has broken her. 

Someone who’s been calling out to her. Someone who wants to finish what he started. 

She won’t allow herself to remember him. Her whole life she’s had to force herself to be strong. The only grace of the void is she doesn’t have to do that here. Because the truth is she’s terrified.  

The flashes of her life feel like they are racing towards a finish line and the closer they get to it, the darker and more distorted they are. She doesn’t want to make out the details of the shady figures and she doesn’t know what the clang of a grandfather clock that she hears every so often entails. Maybe it’s selfish that she’s too scared to want to know. 

But here, in the void, she has the freedom to be scared. That fear allows her to have ignorance, something that she was never allowed to have in the not here. She can remember always having to be strong, she didn’t have a choice in the matter. She remembers being so, so, tired because of it. 

If she had the option…she doesn’t know if she’d want to get back. He can get to her out there. The void is endless and certain, there’s a sense of safety allowed in that. Even if he can leave traces of himself here, she believes that he can’t get to here. She doesn't care if it's cowardly, she's had to be brave her whole life!

When she’s sitting next to El though, she knows El is bidding time till she can get Max out of here. And...she's okay with that. She can be brave for El. Because sometimes it doesn’t feel enough to just see El. She wants to see her out of the void, to hold her hand, feel her being real. Smell her perfume that she started wearing because Nancy wears it. 

She wants El to see her. Max is growing tired of this one-way communication. El may feel her presence and yes El is capable of carrying on a one-sided conversation but it’s not the same. She misses her and she knows El misses her as well. Why come to the void so often if not?

-

The next time El returns it’s different. She’s urgent. “Max! Are you here?!”

Instantly Max goes to her, putting a hand on her shoulder so that she knows she’s here. El is crying. Oh, how she longs to do the simple act of asking her what’s wrong or just to hug her. 

El settles a little when she feels Max’s hand phase through her but not much. She pushes one of her curls behind her ears and straightens her shoulders, looking Max right in the eye. Not that El knows she’s doing that. Even so, she feels how powerful El is as it seems she’s staring into her soul.

She reaches for Max, her hand hovering in her hand, how El knows it’s there she doesn’t know, but it grounds her body. “Max, I need you to wake up now.” 

Wake up?  What? It almost makes her mad that El thinks that leaving the void is as simple as waking up. 

“Max, I need you to try,” El beseeches. 

Max wants to scream that it’s impossible to leave the void, that she’s worried if she tries to leave she’ll end up deeper in it. Be without a body again. And even if she does leave, he’s out there waiting for her. 

But then El chokes on her next words, “The doctors have told your mom it’s time, they say that your…brain dead,” she says that term as if it’s foreign to her, the way you say a new word when you’ve just learned it, “They’re going to kill you because they think that you are gone, but I know you are not, so, please! Wake up, Max! I need you to wake up!” 

And just like that, Max falls. 

-

She’s spiraling. Or at least she thinks she is, all she sees is black. Her hands, oh fuck, she can’t see her hands! Her body, it’s gone! She’s nobody! She can’t feel anything, it’s just like how it was when she got here in the beginning!

Maybe she’s actually dead this time. She kinda hopes she is. 

There’s no way to head to because there’s nowhere to be. What did El say? Brain dead? Doctors were going to kill her? Did she mean they were going to pull the plug? Because there’s only one man who wants her dead. Is that what they did? Maybe this, this space, is just the purgatory before she finally dies. Maybe she can finally get some rest.

She never got to say goodbye! This rips its way through her subconscious. She never got to say goodbye! Not to her mom, not to Lucas who has always been there for her! Not to El…she never got to say goodbye to El. 

Oh, anger blooms all around her, he took everything from her! She never got to say goodbye!

“Max! Wake up!”

Wait, what is that?

“No, she’s in there! You can’t do this! She’s here!”

That’s El. That’s El! She’s with her now!

“Listen to her! If she says there then believe her! Get away from Max!”

That…that’s another voice. Lucas. They’re here with her! 

“I’m coming!” She doesn’t know why she yells that out, but she can hear herself. For the first time in God knows how long she heard her voice! “Guys! I’m coming!’

There are other noises, whirring that sound like it’s coming from machines and she follows it. It grows louder and louder and at some point, Max is running. Her body is back! She dashes through the nothing, the weight of spite propelling her forward.

“El!” she screams out, “I’m here!” She rips her way out of the void. Running and running until…she feels it.

-

She can’t see but it’s different. Everything is covered in white film, movements are detectable but she can’t make out anything.

But her body, she can feel it again. She can feel the pillow behind her head and how scratchy the blanket is on her. At least from her waist up she can feel, it feels like the lower half of her body is still submerged in the void. It feels weird to breathe. It makes her choke.

Someone is sitting on the bed with her, cool to the touch, fingertips push her hair out of her face and a voice coos at her. It’s El. It’s really fucking El. She can touch her, Max is no longer a ghost. She can feel the tears leaking out of her eyes. 

“Don’t cry Max,” El soothes, but her own voice is thick, “I told them you were here, I told them you’d come back. Because you said you wouldn’t leave! Friends don’t lie, you wouldn't have lied to me.”

Max tries to reach out to her with one arm but something keeps it in place. She struggles for a moment before El places a hand on that arm, silently telling her to settle. Max is relieved when she realizes her other arm is free. 

She reaches out to touch El, she wants to feel her be real too, and El grabs her outstretched hand and places it against her cheek. She can feel that they’re wet and knows she was right, El is crying too. 

Her voice in the here is rough and it’s more of a sob but she doesn’t care. 

“I’m here El.”    

A/N: Thank you for reading! Comments fuel my soul!

This is my first Elmax fic <3 which is ironic bc they're my favorite pairing in the St fandom

[andiwriteordie]

elmax/elumax and a hint of byler soulmate au coming at you tonight!

i have been wanting to do an el character study for a while but have been a little nervous to, just because i wanna do her justice! but then this little idea hit me yesterday, and i was busy for most of the day and couldn’t write it all... so i finished it up today. 😊 i hope you enjoy reading it as much as i enjoyed writing it!

(also, happy 50th stranger things fic to me! 🥳)

[shippingfangirl013]

Conglomerate ST S5 Theory Parallels:

So, I wanted to make this post for Back to the Future parallels and what I’ve made of it.

(I grew up watching BTTF with my parents, so the trilogy holds a place in my heart. It’s a bit of a “Dad and me” movie, so, when I found out just how much Inspo the Duffers pulled from the movies, I was shocked but also very excited for S5.)

Anyways, here’s a bunch of parallels (and some interesting Will things I’ve found throughout S2 will be brought up, but that is getting it’s own post because it’s a LOT to dive into.)

First up, the Snow Ball and the Enchantment Under The Sea dance:

The color schemes are the exact same.

The one thing I noticed with the Snow Ball that was more interesting to me than anything else in that scene, is the fact that it’s ONLY the second time in S2 that Will and El are in the same building… and here, they are in the same space, but never meet.

After watching S4, we know that the Snow Ball is important. But for Max, the memory of the Snow Ball wasn’t enough to save her from Vecna. She may have been happy then, but ultimately, love saved Max.(platonic or not, no matter your take on it; love was the reason El was able to heal Max and bring her back to life. Now, if her memories are still intact is negotiable.)

Now, I thought about this, and I was wondering why Max’s happiest memory, (possibly being the Snow Ball), wasn’t enough to save her after she hid in the Snow Ball memory. . .

And I thought that, maybe the significance of the Snow Ball, thematically at least, had a few more underlying reasons for being emphasized, aside from possibly hinting at Elmax or Elumax (I’m still not sure if they will do that, but it’s Stranger Things - the subvert tropes show).

In BTTF, Marty’s parents have their first kiss at the Enchantment Under the Sea dance. . . But at the Snow Ball, we have Joyce and Hopper having a moment outside by Joyce’s car, and Will and El are at the dance - even if they never see one another. It’s interesting to me, that El knew Will wasn’t doing well, and she’s just so certain of it when talking to Joyce in the bedroom, but then, later, the kids all go to the dance. I think that the importance of the Snow Ball is that Will, El, Hopper, Joyce, and Jonathan are all there… and it’s very paralleled to BTTF because of the timeline alteration that split their family apart.

Next, we have the Clock Tower storm and The U.D. / the Storm in S2 & S4:

So… this one seems self explanatory.

There’s a storm on the night Marty travels back in time.

There’s a storm the morning after Will goes missing in S1.

We see the storm in S2 with bolts of red lightning, and then we see the storm again in S4. Something that I wanted to point out here though, is that everyone looking out of windows; Lucas and Erica, Dustin, Steve, Robin, Holly, and Karen - they all only see storm clouds… they don’t see the view that Will & the others see. The importance there is that Will is very likely in a Vecna vision… and I think it just culminates at the end. I honestly think that Will and El were Vecna’d at the same time (and I’ll do a post on the blue flannels later, because it’s very interesting, but I need to get the parallels down so then I can add Part 2 of the overall theory)

Additionally, this kind of hints at Will having time powers, because we see the storm following him throughout the seasons. Now, the clock tower is also important because that is a direct parallel to Vecna/Henry/001 and the clocks… but it also parallels Will because of the Williams clock.

Another pretty obvious parallel is Will having a dog in S1 that looks almost exactly like Einstein- Doc Brown’s dog, the dog seems to act as a way of pointing to the weirder happenings in the show in S1, but then the dog is just… gone after S1. I think this parallels BTTF part 2, because Einstein is missing in most of the ‘Bad Timeline’. I think that the tv blip in S1 is the start of the “bad timeline” for Stranger Things; and it only gets worse from there on out.

Because, in the Bad Timeline, Marty’s mom marries Biff. George dies because Biff shot him with a gun. Marty basically becomes Biff’s step son, and his siblings are financially dependent upon Biff to pay their debts.

And Marty has the seemingly impossible task of fixing everything Biff did, which puts us in line with BTTF part 3 where they have to go fix something in the old west (I haven’t rewatched that one yet for analysis.)

And, in Stranger Things, once the timeline is altered:

Joyce marries Lonnie Byers (like Lorraine marries Biff)

Joyce and Hopper can’t remember being married with a family

Hopper dies (just like George dies)

Marty comes to and finds himself in this strange new place, his mom is there, but he isn’t at home- he’s at Biff’s penthouse (this reminded me of Will waking up in S1 - and asking “Where am I?” Because Marty also asks “Mom? Where am I?”)

El is in the lab & then breaks out (compared to Marty’s siblings not being around in Part 2)

The last parallel I wanted to bring up here is the bubble vest/puffer jacket:

This one seems like another obvious parallel… with Will wearing a vest very similar to Marty’s. But I’ve noticed that S2 is littered with extras wearing the same or similar vests, just the same way S1 is kind of littered with vests… I have to do some digging for S3 and S4, but I’ve found the vests most often in seasons 1 and 2. (I will post about this at some rate as well.)

But as far as BTTF parallels go, at least for parts 1 and 2, that’s sort of all have got at this point.

[trobeds]

hi! do you have any ronance + elmax headanons? <3

HELL YEAH!! ALSO YOU ARE AMAZING THANK YOU FOR THE RONANCE PROMPT IVE BEEN DYING TO RAMBLE ABOUT THEM OMG I LOVE YOU <3

ok so onto the hcs (yeaahh)

robin and max hang out and talk about their crushes a lot and robin ADORES having someone like girls in the same way she does. but straight boy solidarity is great, steve! (ik hes bi obviously it just hasnt clicked yet)

nancy is a journalist with insane instincts, so she was bound to pick up on elmax eventually

robins already out to nance and the party at this point so nancy just mentions it casually in conversation

"hey, do el and max like each other"

robin doesnt have a filter so she just blurts out "wait max told you??"

"...no. i guessed"

and thats how ronance teams up in trying to set elmax up. as if theyre so amazing at confessing to their crushes *hint hint*

ronance = maxs moms = encouraging max to ask el to be her gf near constantly <3

its so silly bcs they dont realize theyre making eyes at each other instead of keeping tabs on elmax and making sure everything is going according to plan

max knows. she knows everything 100% and she keeps thwarting their plans like the self sabotaging bitch she is (rip)

el asks her out first.

she goes to robs bcs she knows robin likes girls and is just like her <3 and they come up with a plan for el to ask max out

she does and their first date is a picnic fuck you i will never give up the elmax/elumax picnic first date agenda

nancy helps el pick out something cute to wear (disclaimer: el is fucking adorable in everything she wears. its all cute.)

they laze around and el appears in her mind so max can see her when she kisses her for the first time <3

max and el are super bouncy and happy next time they talk to ronance and robin and nancy clap for them and get just as excited, if not more

ronance with that sense of "you only got your shit together because of us" high-fiving quote unquote, "subtly"

the roles reverse. el and max are the matchmakers now (+ steve bcs hes ronance truther #1 in my mind)

el using her powers to make them gravitate towards each other and them giving her death glares that say "what are u doing stop trying to set us up its obviously unrequited" and el just stares back like "girl wtf are you talking about??" while max gives them thumbs up and nods encouragingly while both robin and nancy think theyre being set up for rejection.

once nancy composes herself she power walks her ass over to robins house to tell her that el and max are trying to set them up

robin "what? no theyre not haha why would they do that its not like we like each other amiright? am. i. right." buckley and nancy "yeah ofc totally not. right. youre right." wheeler being kind of oblivious.

they get together when robin is just rambling about this book she read one day and she wont shut up and theyre sitting close enough that their sides are pressed together and their knees are in a perpetual state of bumping into each other and shes just so adorable and pretty and hot and nancy just cant resist

she grabs her face and kisses her

it takes a hot minute before she pulls away in mortification and robin starts talking. again.

"that was mind-blowing but if that was an experiment we can just forget about this. um. if it wasnt. id be surprised but...not opposed. at all. but thats not possible so anyways, my book was so-" ohmygodohmygodohmygodholyshitohmygodwhatthefuckohmygod

theyre girlfriends pretty soon after

elmax commends them on *finally* getting their shit together

final verdict: elmax and ronance are in love

anyways, thank you sm for the ask!! i really enjoyed answering it ily and take care of yourself <3 <3 <3

[sterlingarcher23]

-Elumax - Patterns - Rhymes -

A very important element of both Elmax and Lumax are the patterns/rhymes within Stranger Things. There are real patterns for both ships that are complementary to each other.

Because we are heading for a poly relationship which will be like no other, not a love triangle, a poly. That's why they wear this: El & Lucas are equals.

These are there since Season 2 with El and Max meeting and Max is using Luca's binoculars while he's standing next to her. The amount of elements seems overwhelming but it's technically pretty simple and they have a darkness/daylight cycle.

Here's a cut of Elmax so far:

Both patterns have slight changes in the third cycle or verse, meaning that there will be a 4th cycle/verse in order to rhyme/for symmetry reasons.

Each season gives us another line of the poem, so since these look similar to a quartain with a cross rhyme (peotry was not my strength in school and this was also a long time ago).

So, yes, the patterns are rhymes, it's a poem.

"Rhymes that keep their secrets will unfold behind the clouds"

Both patterns also give us a timeframe for things to happen, meaning that in Season 5 El & Max meet again in Episode 2(-3) in the mind-world and with the skateboard (that's why they showed us this memory in S4) and Max will use Lucas's binoculars again from an elevated position when both are alone in Episode 4. (Which also tells you at that point: Max isn't blind.)

The patterns are:

It is interesting how the slow motion is used in dark and gloomy scenes, it almost feels like a dream moment.

Note that Max looking to the left and right (especially in S3 & 4) is only possible due to the camera angle, so she's actually looking straight forward.

Obviously even these patterns depend on the story and events but the events basically are repeated and rhyme as good and accurate as possible. Based on when these patterns happen, how and in which constellation, tuey not only structure the events in terms of moment in time/season and the weight it has to the scene and characters, they reinforce a specific feeling you associate with them.

We do know that the Duffers like to parallel things, however rarely is there talk about real patterns or mirroring effects that are also constantly used.

Anyway, these poems are unique and wether or not certain aspects of these patterns were intended already in Season 2, it is noteworthy that they started then when they actually mapped out the character arcs. The tiny changes in the 3rd line may also indicate how the focus is changing. Max being the initial focus in the Elmax-pattern in S4 and Lucas looking at Max, so that we follow his line of sight to Max, is also very telling.

The "follow the line of sight", left to right and it's mirrored version is used often in the show, mostly it is done to tell the story or foreshadow events, highlight certain aspects on a subconscious level.

The Elmax-pattern wasn't something I discovered myself ; the basic events happening was noticed by others I only found put that there is a specific rhyming scheme in them. In other words: these patterns were noticed by others as well.

So, the basic stuff is import before I get to the really heartbreaking and also beautiful stuff, a crazy concept that's in Stranger Things from the start because:

Even though they wanted to kill off Eleven in Season 1, they put in hints that she likes girls.

Oh, and, yes Max is partly inspired by Mad Max but that's a story of it's own.

PS: my guess is that the Episode numbers do play a role here and adding them equals 20 in both cases, so you can make an educated guess what the episode numbers of Season 5 will be.

[thesapphicsoldier]

I am not the type of person who needs their ships to be canon.

Elmax/elumax, ronance, steddie, buckingham— they’re all very cute and I like them, but they weren’t written romantically and that’s okay. Tbh if they made these ships happen in the last season it’d be very sudden and I probably wouldn’t like it (and it’d be impossible in steddie and buckingham’s case lol). I’m perfectly content with reading fan fiction and scrolling through edits on TikTok.

But byler?

They just make so much sense. They’re so sweet with each other and they’re childhood best friends, and everything that’s happened in the show has been building up their relationship. Between the many many clues, subtle (or not-so-subtle, looking at you Noah) hints from the actors, and the downfall of Mike and El’s relationship— there’s no way byler isn’t endgame. And frankly, if it isn’t, I’m canceling my Netflix subscription (not actually, but I’d be very disappointed).

What I’m trying to say is, my constant reblogging of byler theories and swearing that it’s canon isn’t just wishful thinking because I like the ship. It’s the countless evidence that I’ve seen throughout my time in the fandom that makes me truly hope and believe that Mike and Will are gonna end up together.

[meredithdoesfandoms]

FINAL SCENE SCRIPT ANALYSIS

first off, quick apology to the lumaxes. we bashed yall all week, and then we (bylers) got fucking clowned <333

also the winners this week: joppers!!! truly thought this was gonna be a dub for the bylers, but yall joppers are so unproblematic u rlly deserve it

OK LETS GET INTO IT WITH WHAT LITTLE I HAVE TO WORK WITH

^no analysis for this tbh, its just cute asf, i love the joyce-el familial relationship, AND THE CUTE JOPPER HINTS AWWW

^OUR FAMILY😭😭😭 if it wasn't certain before, it is clear now: jopper is endgame, not just this season, but for the duration of the show + the stranger things universe

^this was when i first realized that we arent gonna get anything byler out of this script. byler was relying on subtext and directorial notes being explained in the script. this scene looks normal and sweet on paper, but this moment was played as kind of awkward on screen . this was the first sign that we arent getting the notes and stage direction we wanted.

^we have now begun forshadowing main character will!!! its about time tbh

^not rlly an analysis but i always wondered what the writers call them, and what yall call them. spores, that makes sense

^congrats joppers😭😭😭 yall deserve this yall are so unproblematic- note that this is the only pairing given explicit stage directions, they are also the only pairing that has been established as a pairing

^of course im gonna mention the order of the names cuz thats all the bylers got this week🤡

^but united is italicized, so like thats cool? note that their is no written direction for the characters to be split into pairs? does that mean that we should interpret united as one force, but not necessarily as individual pairs?

^ok so now theyre just fucking with us. cool.

overall this gave us literally nothing for analysis! which is weird due to the fact that this is a subtext heavy scene, with little to none of this subtext actually being on paper. im curious as to why this is- was it intentionally left out? or was all of the subtext, stage directions, and notes a last minute decision made by the writers and directors, which us why it took them a full day to film?

IN SUMMARY

• predicted winners this week- bylers, jancys, joppers

• actual winners this week- eleven independence arc stans, joppers, any hopper/byers relationship

• predicted losers this week- milevens

• actual losers this week- bylers

•neglected this week- LUMAXES, steddies, stancys, ronances, stobins, elmaxes, milevens, byclairs, henderclairs, henderbyclairs, elumaxes, jargyles

[runninguplenorahills]

name suggestions

There’s no pressure at all to actually use one of these!!!!

Though I hope you find one you actually like. I wrote a little description about the names/thoughts behind the names because knowing what the thought process was might help with liking the name more. I did look if any of those names are taken already and it seems like they’re all free to use! (though I recommend checking again).

rougeronance

You said you like the color pink and pink is generally considered to be a tint of red, and “Red” is of course the name of one of Taylor Swifts albums. To make it sound a little nicer and softer I used the French name for red which is “rouge” and since various shades of red and pink are associated with love and romance I followed it up with “ronance” since that’s of course a romantic pairing but also sounds almost exactly like the word “romance”.

getawaycardigan

This is just a mix out of two Taylor Swift songs: “getaway car” and “cardigan”. It’s simple and nice and therefore it doesn’t set this expectation what your blog is “supposed to be” about, while still of course hinting at your love for the artist.

elmarald

This almost sounds like it could be the name of an ancient wizard in some fantasy book hahahha. But it’s actually simply the words “elmax” and “emerald” morphed together. Since you said you like the color green I thought it might be fitting.

maxnightrain

You said you like both elmax and elumax so I assume you probably like Max which is why this name is just a combination of Max and Taylor Swift’s song “Midnight Rain”.

elvenderhaze

This is the same concept as the last one since El is also included in both elmax and elumax which is why I assume you like El very much as well. So here is a mix of El and Taylor Swift’s song “Lavender Haze”, which also sounds like it could be the name of some magical meadow or something hahah.

bylerthanthewholesky

This is once again the same concept as “maxnightrain” and “elvanderhaze”. Though this time it’s a mix out of byler and Taylor Swift’s song “bigger than the whole sky”.

kampagne

I’m not familiar with kotlc so I’m sorry for the lack of name suggestions with those ships and characters. But this for once is a combination of Kam which seems to be a ship name (?) and champagne which is also the name of a shade of pink and also ties in Taylor Swift’s song “Champagne problems”. Furthermore it sounds like campaign which then again kinda brings in the stranger things element due to the association to dnd.

help me

i think i wanna change my user, i'm not really feeling bylerlve anymore :(