#his desire to be some kind of macho man literally ENDED him

[pennyserenade]

gregory peck westerns are a thousand times better than other westerns because he had sense enough to know you could be a little cowboy and make commentary on the fallaciousness of toxic masculinity that so often plagued the men who loved them, too. i do think some of those men might’ve been too stupid to realize that’s what they were about but i appreciate the effort. i saw it gregory peck

[percontaion-points]

Elizabeth and the Call of Dragons (Fated Alpha #2) chapter 1

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Click here for the rest of the series!

Chapter 1

DEDICATION

To Christina and Brittany 

Without you, my last book would’ve been stuupid [sic]

I’m a little worried about what the book looked like without their help. Especially because there’s a typo on the dedication page. 

The man who murdered my parents sprinted down the airport runway in his wolf form, followed by hundreds of shifter wolves. My own pack was trying to kill me. 

That should have been obvious when he murdered your parents and then started to hunt you down. 

I get that this is technically book two, and there’s always some need to rehash what’s going on. But at the same time… Come on. This is literally five seconds after the end of the first book. 

I felt like a traitor and a coward, running from my father’s killer and away from the man who loved me. 

Is it seriously being cowardly to run from a huge mob of angry werewolves who want to murder you? Live to fight another day. 

“Just know this. I will do anything to make you mine.”

I honestly hate this kind of macho bullshit. This isn’t romantic, it’s fucking creepy. 

What if Liz eventually decides she doesn’t even want to be in a relationship with you? Would you seriously make her unhappy simply to sate your own desire?

Fucking asshole. 

“There are rumors of wolf women who have bore dragon pups. It is possible.”

This is up there with the Donkey/Dragon relationship in Shrek. Although I’m positive that this author is going to make the babies cute.

Side note, but how do I know that there are going to be babies? Because the last book in the series is literally called “Elizabeth and Her Baby Dragon”.

“Oh, those are just rumors. Who knows if they’re true or not. Besides, you guys can’t take that chance. You’re one of the most elite teams, and you must mate with a pureblood dragon. You’re honor bound to it. You gave your oath to the Queen to serve her Kingdom.” 

The blood drained from my face at the horror of what she was saying. 

Is it seriously that weird? It makes perfect sense to me. 

If anything, Liz should be kind of disappointed to learn that she’s going to be unable to have sexytimes with the sexy dragon man/men. 

Everything clicked in my head. This wasn’t going to happen. Me and these guys, it was just a temporary thing. They’d really just come to save me and that was it. I suddenly realized that even though I was still hurting from Aaron, I had hoped that these guys would be a permanent thing in my life.

She’s known them for less than a week at this point. Calm down, babe. The attachment you have is the trauma talking. 

… and the humidity clung to me like a lover. 

[Image description: A screenshot of Clint Eastwood. He is an elderly man with short grey hair. He is wearing a white and grey striped button-down shirt. He is holding a mug. He is giving a look of disgust and contempt to something off-screen. It is captioned with “I had to read this and so do you”. End description]

“No!” I felt a strong energy force its way into my head and then everything was dark.

Chapter 1 summary: We pick up immediately where we’d left off at the end of the first book, with the plane with the broken window taking off and leaving Liz’s old pack behind on the runway. There’s a lot of internal angst from Liz as they fly, but it’s all recap from the first book. 

They land and immediately get onto another plane. Liz is too out of it and trapped in her own head to notice when they land again. They’re randomly in Hawaii now, except that she’s too tired to think straight. She falls onto the bed, but wakes up later to Hunter trying to put a blanket over her. He says some stuff about the powers that they have, but I’m not sure that it even matters much. 

He then starts to kiss her, but Liz stops him. She tells him a bit about Aaron, and how she knows that he’s been forced into an engagement with Olivia. That no matter what, she has to go back and at least help free Aaron from his abusive, murderous father. Hunter obviously doesn’t like this, and makes a bunch of super creepy promises that she’ll be his. 

Liz wakes up later, and overhears some fighting. It’s one of the female dragons, briefly mentioned in the first book. Her name is Sophia. Anyway, she’s angry that they’ve exposed themselves for literally one person. The work she had to do in order to keep the weredragon identities hidden was quite high… Regardless of the fact that there’s a dragon who can literally erase memories, so I don’t get why she’s so upset. Anyway, she goes on to remind them that canines and lizards can’t interbreed, so forget about it. She tells them that they all have a duty to mate with female weredragons, and that she’s found some more of said females. 

At this point, Liz simply wants to leave. She goes and puts some clothes on, and contemplates stealing a car. She decides to go on foot because the car would be too loud. As she’s going, she walks past a cemetery, where a super creepy woman “missing half of her breast” sang a really sad song to her. If you have ever seen literally any horror movie in your life, you probably know how this is going to end. 

Anyway, Liz decides to follow her, because she’s too stupid to be alive. Quite literally, in this case. The thing turns out to be some sort of monster that starts attacking her and then tries to eat her. However, as you probably guessed, the dragons show up. Hunter and Sophia chase the monster away while Christian tries to use his powers to help her, but she doesn’t like that. For some unholy reason. 

[sourwormsaresour]

what are your thoughts on La Squadra's sexualities?

First off, Happy Pride Month! Please have a safe one. Before I start, I just want to let you guys know that I’m a straight cisgender woman so I’m not 100% knowledgeable on sexualities so these are based on my current knowledge of the community. I’m open to all head-canons about La Squadra’s sexualities besides my own :)

Sorbet and Gelato are gay, both using he/him pronouns, and are the most out compared to everyone in the team. Even though La Squadra knew about their relationships, the two themselves aren’t open about it outside of the team and their families. This is especially because relationships can be used against you in the crime world but also because their families rely on them to have a “good reputation” to live comfortably. I head-canon that they are both breadwinners of their families: Gelato has siblings that go to very conservative, academic institutions and rely on scholarships that look into family history for recommendations, and Sorbet’s mother requires medical attention from reputable doctors that also have homophobic biases that can be used against her. They’ve secretly used some of their money to help a street kid or two that they learned was disowned after being outed or assassinated a few people for hurting kids for being part of the LGBTQ+ community or even preying on them. The two men probably both went through phases where they thought they only liked women, tried to be in heterosexual relationships, and their enemies-to-lovers type of relationship had probably stemmed from their inability to properly process their attraction to each other at the time.

Formaggio is bisexual and prefers using he/him pronouns; he has a stronger attraction to women but is unaware that he’s attracted to men as well. A big part of why he’s so unaware or in denial of it came from his conservative upbringing in a working-class family and lack of representation growing up. Formaggio knew that men can be attracted to other men, but other aspects of the LGBTQ+ community is either unknown to him or seen in a negative perception; he’s learning more about the community and how to be a better ally, especially after meeting Sorbet and Gelato, but he’s still struggling to reverse the anti-LGBTQ+ sentiments he grew up believing. As a result of his past, Formaggio assumed that one can only be attracted to one gender and never crossed his mind that people can be attracted to more than one. He often tries to hide his attraction to men via “straight guy who’s unaware he’s gay occasionally spits homophobic jokes and says ‘no homo’ every time he says "I love you" to his friends but he means full homo” approach.

Illuso is pansexual and gender fluid, preferring he/him/they/them pronouns most of the time but also likes using neo-pronouns and occasionally prefers to use she/her pronouns. As a former intern for a fashion designer before he joined La Squadra, he’s relatively more exposed to meeting different people in the LGBTQ+ community through fashion; those who were higher in status and power would be more out about it than those in lower ranking and the community was a huge source for avant-garde, counter-culture influences. Despite getting more inspiration for his designs from his interactions and developing his identity in the LGBTQ+ space, that also led to him witnessing discrimination, abuse, and powerplay caused by the higher-ups; some became victims simply because of rumors that they may be part of the LGBTQ+ community or being forcibly outed, some are forced into relationships in exchange for opportunities and privileges, etc. He remains closeted and part of his arrogance stems from him hiding his sexuality due to the trauma of enduring the abuse and witnessing it as well. La Squadra doesn’t know his sexuality or know that he’s genderfluid, but they’re fine with adapting to his pronouns whenever they change.  

Pesci is unaware that they’re gay and are non-binary that prefers they/them pronouns. Although they try to stick to he/him pronouns to avoid being out, they like using they/them more and get secretly happy when someone refers to them as such. I head-canon that they’re actually younger than Giorno when they encountered Team Bucciarati, which would explain why he never killed anyone up until this point (they’re a literal kid that’s slowly getting involved in the team when Sorbet and Gelato were killed, albeit they’re on the buffer side despite their age), and with their sheltered childhood and Prosciutto’s strict mentorship, they never got to sit down and think about their sexual and gender identity. They often try to pretend they’re a macho straight man alongside Formaggio but they end up feeling bad about it after trying to say a bad comment or joke to fit in. Pesci themselves feel like they’re alone in terms of the emotions of not being able to put your sexuality into words. It doesn’t help that they’re rather isolated compared to everyone except Risotto; they only knew La Squadra as their family ever since they joined the team and they never talk to anyone outside of the group.

Prosciutto is bisexual and genderfluid, preferring to identify with he/him pronouns, but he’s also the most closeted and probably has the most internalized homophobia as well. Growing up in the entertainment industry, especially in acting, means adhering to heteronormative standards; controversies of any kind would make or break a career and he constantly heard homophobic statements “disguised” as critiques around him from all levels of the entertainment industry. The fact that he was overworked up until his “career retirement” also didn’t give him the time to sit down and realize both his sexuality and how fucked up the film industry is in terms of its treatment towards the LGBTQ+ community. With his upbringing of being presentable and hiding his sexuality, he tries to present himself in the most Italian metrosexual straight machismo man he could and uses his “gentleman charms” towards women to avoid people from questioning further about his sexuality. But at the end of the day, he knows he’s lying to himself about his sexuality. And unfortunately, his anger at being unable to express that is often misdirected.

Melone is demi-sexual, though he presents himself as asexual and panromantic, and prefers using any pronouns. Like his teammates, he prefers using he/him for his safety. As a former scientist, he learned and got to know about the LGBTQ+ community through a more scientific perspective, but also knew there are hidden homophobic biases in the science community as well. Still, he does his best to be an ally for his peers before realizing he is demisexual and panromantic. His sexuality allows him to view the incubation and child-rearing aspect of his Stand without emotions or feelings involved and further explains how he views fornication and training his Juniors in a very scientific and analytical way without guilt taking over. Despite presenting himself as ace/straight (mostly for safety and because it’s easier to explain that he has no attraction to people than being a demisexual), I also see someone who yearns to have a strong emotional connection to someone and would give his all to the person he loves most. His overtly sexual nature is more of an act (I've heard that some aces tend to act overtly sexual, either to avoid being outed or as a result of growing up thinking that need to feel an attraction is necessary) and Melone secretly desires being attracted to someone he learns to trust, admire, and love over time. I have a backstory that plays into that but I might disclose it another time. ;)

Ghiaccio is on the same boat with Prosciutto in terms of having internalized homophobia due to his childhood career as a child athlete. At the time he was training to be an Olympic hopeful as a solo figure skater, Ghiaccio was born female and had to remain in the closet due to the conservative nature of the ice skating world and his step-father being notorious for his opinions favoring homophobia and sexism. Once he joined La Squadra, Ghiaccio began experimenting with himself and ultimately came out as transgender, presenting himself with he/him pronouns, and had been using testosterone ever since. Most members that joined after him only knew Ghiaccio as male while the other members are either indifferent about his gender or are involved in helping Ghiaccio transition to be male. Transitioning also helped him realized he was aromantic and gay, which provided him closure from the years of struggle he had trying to fit into the heteronormative expectations he thought he had to conform to when he was female. The effect of testosterone also explains his brash and short-tempered nature, although that stems more from him finally being able to express himself after years of repressing his emotions as a child.

Risotto is also aromantic and asexual, preferring he/him/they/them pronouns, although he doesn’t know that he is aro/ace, to begin with. Growing up, he never really cared when he heard his older relatives or adults making comments about how “he’d make a good husband” or “have the girls chase him”, because all he cared about was his family and friends. He just assumes that once he becomes a “big boy”, then he’ll have thoughts of wanting to get married like the fairytales say. Just let his future spouse have children with him in any way and he'll play the role of husband regardless. Since his cousin’s death, he gave up the idea of having any sexual or romantic interest in anyone. Why to go out of your way to find any relationship when they’ll be dead soon enough- that was Risotto’s logic. He’s not aware that he can define himself as aro/ace, he just assumes that the trauma he went through with his cousin’s death stops him from feeling any attraction and doesn’t make an effort to figure out why.  

[fallout-drabbles-n-stuff]

How does the companions react when exploring a building full of dangerous paranormal activity with sole? ( i played a horror mod in which i hoped i couldve went with my companion but the mod didnt let me so big 00f)

(Yesssss 😈)

Cait:

“Nope, uh-uh, i ain’t up for this shite.”

She took one good look at the eerie, almost alive looking faces of a set of mannequins and promptly decided that she wouldn’t even attempt it. She doesn’t scare easy but when it comes to fighting the invisible? Fuck no.

Curie:

“..........oh no.”

She was so certain that the paranormal didn’t exist, claiming all phenomena could be explained with factual, scientific evidence. However no “science” could explain the chair suddenly being thrown across the room. After witnessing such a random spurt of violence from an unseen assailant, her doe like eyes only widened more. She isn’t ashamed to admit she’s wrong in this instant.

Danse:

“Stay close to me, something seems off...did you hear that?”

He’d try so hard to be that typical “macho man” and protect you but truthfully he was quivering in his power armour. He despises anything remotely creepy, so seeing the apparition of a sinister child suddenly materialize a foot away from him...let’s just say the Paladin almost fainted.

Deacon:

“Shhh, stay calm. It’s going to be alright, don’t be afraid of Casper.”

Deacon would honestly freak you out more than the ghost. How did he even know what Casper was? Regardless, he’d be incredibly calm in the face of the supernatural and consequently would be able to subdue the spirit.

Gage:

“Fuck this, I done seen what happened back at that shitty manor outside the park...never again.”

Gage used to be a non-believer but after a rough visit at Grandchester Mansion...he believes, and he hates them. He’ll even swallow his pride and admit that he can’t go through with the mission, refusing to follow you until you reassure him that you won’t go.

Hancock:

“Oh please, spirits ain’t got nothing on the living. At least ghosts have a narrow list of what they want..”

He’s another one of the people that genuinely isn’t scared of the paranormal. True to his word, he acknowledges that the living are more capricious and usually operate however they desire. That’s scary. Sorry Casper, you just don’t scare that ghoul.

Macready:

“Oh fu..I mean, frick- actually you know what? No! None of this, please...”

As soon as you mention there being rumors of ghosts or supernatural activity, he might as well have ran away. At least then he would’ve spared himself his dignity. He practically begged you not to go in and if you manage to get him to go...he’ll be clutching his rifle the entire time, trying to picture himself in his happy place.

Maxson:

“These..um..things, are not actually real- or so I thought..”

It was very rare that Maxson did field missions without a team at his back, but you had proven yourself to be more than capable so he trusted you. That being said, he practically laughed when you admitted to there being paranormal activity in the building you took him to. However his doubts were quickly shattered when the mischievous spirit haunting the place threw a table directly at him. There wasn’t any logical explanation....and next thing you know, the fearsome elder is holding onto you like a frightened child.

Old Longfellow:

“I need you to reach into my bag...and get the salt, real slow like.”

He’s old, he’s seen just about everything the world could throw at him. That means that he’s also learned a few tricks in his time, ones that evidently help him combat the supernatural. Provided you follow his orders, he’ll form a salt circle around the both of you and wait for the spirit to lose interest.

Piper:

“You see it too..right?”

She’d be totally astonished. She’s seen some crazy things in her days, heck, her job gave her new things each day to rant and rave about. However...this certainly tops it. You and her had been retrieving a certain item said to posses special abilities in a ran down apartment building, only to stumble upon a shadowy figure stalking the two of you. She felt so sorry though she was going to cry.

Preston:

“I know it’s supposed to be scary, but trust me on this one, relax and we’ll be fine...”

He wasn’t entirely sure how he was so okay with the presence, perhaps a piece of him knew that it was just another person..a much more unfortunate one, but still a person. So, somehow he’d manage to keep cool- convincing the spirit that he had no intentions to harm- as a matter of fact- he wanted to help them. At the end of the day when it was all over, he’d sit with a drink and be forced by his own mind to contemplate the afterlife.

Sturges:

“I think I’ve seen enough, can’t we just blow this popsicle stand?”

He’d have the kind of reaction would one probably expect to seeing a literal ghost faze it’s way into reality. The color drained from his face, his hands trembling and his body set swaying with every step he took. At first he’d try to play it cool, trying to hint at leaving...and that’s when he fell to the ground like a ton of bricks.

You were not happy.

X6-88:

“Well, I’m out. Let’s go.”

He’d promptly empty a round of fusion cells into the apparition, causing the smell of burnt wood to become unbearable as the shots seared through the door the being was standing in front of. After he realized it didn’t even slow the figure down, he grabbed onto you and teleported back to safety. Later that night he decided he didn’t like ghosts that much...they don’t bleed.

[aion-rsa]

Star Trek Villains Who Actually Had a Point

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This article contains spoilers for various parts of the Star Trek franchise.

Last fall, airing just a few weeks apart, both Star Trek and Star Wars debuted season premieres of new streaming TV episodes in which the heroes of each show had to fight a giant, legless worm-monster. In Star Trek: Discovery’s “That Hope Is You Part 1,” it was the deadly Tranceworm, while The Mandalorian’s “Chapter 9: The Marshall” had the murderous Krayt Dragon. The differences between the Final Frontier and the Faraway Galaxy could not have been made clearer by these dueling beasts: in Mando, the plot involved killing the monster by blowing up its guts from the inside, while in Disco, Book taught Michael Burnham how to make friends with it.

The Trek universe deals with the concept of evil a little differently than many of its famous genre competitors. There is no Lex Luthor of the Federation. Palpatine doesn’t haunt the planet Vulcan. The Klingons have no concept of “the devil.” (At least in The Original Series.) This isn’t to say Trek doesn’t have some very memorable Big Bads, it’s just that most of the time those villains tend to have some kind of sympathetic backstory. Even in the J.J. Abrams films! 

So, with that in mind, here’s a look at seven Star Trek villains who maybe weren’t all bad, and kind of, even in a twisted way, had a point…

Harry Mudd

In Star Trek: The Original Series, Harry Mudd was presented as a straight-up con-man, a dude who seemed to be okay with profiting from prostitution (in “Mudd’s Women”) and was also down with marooning the entire crew of the Enterprise on a random planet (in “I, Mudd”). He’s not a good person. Not even close. But, he does make a pretty could case against Starfleet’s lack of planning. In the Discovery episode “Choose Your Pain,” Mudd accuses Starfleet of starting the war with the Klingons, and, as a result, putting the larger population of the galaxy at risk. “I sure as hell understand why the Klingons pushed back,” Mudd tells Ash Tyler. “Starfleet arrogance. Have you ever bothered to look out of your spaceships down at the little guys below? If you had, you’d realize that there’s a lot more of us down there than there are you up here, and we’re sick and tired of getting caught in your crossfire.”

Seska

At a glance, Seska seems pretty irredeemable. She joins the idealistic Maquis but is secretly a Cardassian spy. Once in the Delta Quadrant, she tries to screw Voyager as much as possible, mostly by hooking up with the Kazon. That said, Seska is also someone caught up in hopelessly sexist, male-dominated power structures and does what she has to do to gain freedom and power. The Cardassian military isn’t exactly enlightened nor kind, so the fact that Seska was recruited into the Obsidian Order in the first place certainly explains her deceptive conditioning. You could argue that Seska could have become a better person once she had Captain Janeway as an ally, but, the truth is, she was still a spy caught behind enemy lines, but suddenly without a government to report back to. So, Seska did what she had to do to survive, even lying to Chakotay about having his child. The thing is, again, outside of Starfleet, Seska is at the mercy of the sexist machinations of the Kazon, so again, she’s kind of using all the tools at her disposal to gain freedom. Had Voyager not gone to the Delta Quadrant, and Seska’s villainy may have been more clear-cut. But, once the reason for her espionage becomes moot, her situation gets more desperate, and, on some level, more understandable. 

Charlie Evans

In The Original Series, Kirk loves telling humans with god-like powers where to shove it. In “Where No Man Has Gone Before,” he phasers Gary Mitchell and buries him under a rock. But, in “Charlie X,” when teenager Charlie Evans also gets psionic powers, Kirk does a less-than-a-great job of being a good role model. For most of the episode, Kirk tries to avoid become Charlies’ surrogate parent, and when he does try, it results in an embarrassing overly macho wrestling match featuring those famous pink tights.

Read more

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How Star Trek: The Next Generation’s Killing of Tasha Yar Became an Awkward Mistake

By Joseph Baxter

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Why Star Trek Needs More Characters Like Captain Lorca

By Lacy Baugher

Charlie was a deeply troubled human being, and there was no justification for him harassing the crew and Janice Rand in specific. But, angry, kids like Charlie have to be helped before it gets to this point. Kirk mostly tried to dodge the adult responsibility of teaching Charlie the ropes, and only when some friendly aliens arrived, did everyone breathe a sigh of relief. But, don’t get it twisted, those aliens are basically just social workers, doing the hard work Starfleet is incapable of.

The Borg Queen

Because the origin of the Borg Queen has dubious canonical origins, all we were told in Voyager is that she was assimilated as a child, just like Seven of Nine. As Hugh and Jean-Luc discuss in the Picard episode “The Impossible Box,” basically, everyone assimilated by the Borg, is, on some level, a victim. The Queen was never presented this way in either First Contact or Voyager, but, at one point, writers Judith and Garfield Reeves-Stevens had pitched a story for Enterprise which would have featured Alice Krige as a Starfleet medical technician who made contact with the Borg.

Because both Alice Krige and Susanna Thompson played the Borg Queen, it’s possible the backstories of each Queen is different and that maybe they aren’t the same character. Either way, assuming the Borg Queen retains some level of autonomy relative to other drones (likely?) then she’s pretty much making the best of a bad situation. In fact, at the point at which you concede the Borg are unstoppable, the Queen’s desire to let Picard retain some degree of his independence as Locutus could scan as a kind of mercy. The Borg Queen actually thinks she and the Borg are making things simpler for everyone. And with both Data and Picard, she tried to make that transition easier and, in her own perverse way, fun too.

Ossyra

Yes, we saw Ossyra feed her nephew to a Trance worm, and we also saw her try to kill literally everyone on the USS Discovery, including Michael Burnham. However, in the middle of all of that, Ossyra did try to actively make peace between the Emerald Chain and the Federation. And, most tellingly, it was her idea. Ossyra also pointed out one of the most hypocritical things about the United Federation of Planets: the fact that Starfleet and its government rely on capitalism without actively acknowledging it. Essentially, Ossyra was saying that the ideals of the Federation are great, but the Federation has all kinds of dirty little secrets it doesn’t want to talk about. In her meeting with Admiral Vance, pretty much everything she said about the Federation was true—and her treaty proposal was fair. 

Read more

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The only snag: she wouldn’t turn herself over as a war criminal. Considering the fact that the Federation made Mirror Georgiou into a Section 31 agent, despite her war crimes in another universe, this also seems hypocritical.  Why not just do the same thing with Ossyra? Tell everyone she’s going to prison for war crimes, but make her a Section 31 agent instead? Missed opportunity! 

Khan

Khan was genetically engineered by wacko-a-doodle scientists at the end of the 21st Century. At some point on Earth, he became a “prince” with “power over millions.” But, as Kirk notes in “Space Seed,” there were “no massacres” under Khan’s rule, and described him as the “best of the tyrants.” Kirk’s take on Khan in “Space Seed” is basically that Khan was an ethical megalomaniac. Most of what we see in “Space Seed” backs this up. Khan doesn’t actually want to kill the crew, and stops short of doing it when he thinks he can coerce them instead. His only focus is to gain freedom for himself and his exiled fellow-Augments. In the Kelvin Universe timeline, Khan’s motivations are similar. Into Darkness shows us a version of Khan who, again, is only cooperating with Section 31 because he wants freedom for his people. Sure, he’ll crush some skulls and crash some starships to get to that point, but in his dueling origin stories, Khan is, in both cases interested in freedom for his people, who, are by any definition, totally persecuted by the Federation.

Khan is still a criminal in any century. But, we only really think of him as a villain because he goes insane in between the “Space Seed” and The Wrath of Khan. The Khan of The Wrath is not the same person we met in “Space Seed.” As he tells Chekov, “Admiral Kirk never bothered to check on our progress.” Had Kirk sent a Starfleet ship to drop in on Khan and his “family” every once in awhile this whole thing could have been avoided. In the prime timeline, Khan goes nuts because Ceti Alpha VI explodes and nobody cares. In the Kelvin timeline, Admiral Marcus blackmails him. Considering that Khan is Star Trek’s most famous villain, it’s fascinating that there are a million different ways you can imagine him never getting as bad as he became. In “Space Seed,” he and Kirk basically part as friends. 

Q

In “Encounter at Farpoint,” Q accuses humanity of being “a savage child race.” And walks Jean-Luc Picard through the various atrocities committed by humanity, through the 21st Century. Picard kind of shrugs his shoulders and says, “we are what we are and we’re doing the best that we can.” When we talk about the philosophy of Star Trek, we tend to give more weight to Picard’s argument: the idea that by the 24th century, humanity has become much better, in general than it is now. But, the other side of the argument; that there’s a history of unspeakable violence and cruelty baked into the existence of humanity, is given less weight. We don’t really listen to Q when he’s putting humanity on trial, because we can’t see his point of view.

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But, because Q wasn’t a one-off character, and because he said “the trial never ends” in the TNG finale, he’s actually not really a villain at all. Q exists post-morality, as we can imagine it. His notions of ethics are far more complex (or less complex) than we can perceive. Q is one of those great Star Trek characters who is actually beyond reproach simply because we have no frame of reference for his experiences or point of view. In Voyager, we also learned that even among other members of the Q Continuum, Q was kinder, with a more humanitarian approach to what he might call “lesser” lifeforms. If Q is villainous, it’s because of our definitions of villainy. Of every Star Trek antagonist, Q is the best one, for the simple fact that he’s not a a villain at all. 

Which Star Trek villains do you think had a point? Let us know in the comments below.

The post Star Trek Villains Who Actually Had a Point appeared first on Den of Geek.

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[connorspiracy]

Not The Kind of Snacc I Had In Mind || Connor & Luis

TIMING: Current PARTIES: @connorspiracy and @ontheluis  CONTENT: Recreational drug use, NSFW SUMMARY: Connor and Luis decide to meet up after chatting on a dating app and absolutely nothing goes wrong. 

Grindr dates were weird. Connor was far from opposed to a simple shag, but he usually felt like he was supposed to not be so blatant about it, to try and be a gentleman. Was it customary to clean the house before a Grindr hookup came over? He wasn’t sure, but he did what he could to make the place presentable; ran the roomba, made the bed that he was sure would be messed up again pretty soon, lit some Yankee Candles. He’d showered, changed his clothes, brushed his teeth, and was debating starting on a beer when the buzz of the doorbell stirred him from the couch, indicating his date’s arrival. Connor answered, giving the other man a smile in greeting. He’d had no clue this was wolfbane-dude when he’d proverbially swiped right, but seeing the young man in front of him, he put it together. Not that it mattered. He was still certainly curious, but seeing the profile pics come to life before his eyes gave him little desire to revisit that conversation anytime soon. “Hey, Luis, right? Come on in, I was just about to grab a drink if you want one?” 

The cold freshness of the Whye River single lingered in Luis’ nostrils even after the water had dried off his skin and hair. Bathing in the river outside his date’s upscale neighborhood might not exactly be classy, but the brutal pragmatism of Luis’ new life had weaned him off feeling embarrassed about trivial things. Piers’ place reminded Luis of the houses along Boca Chica, eliciting a sharp prick of unwanted remembrance amidst the more arduous thoughts in his head. 

Connor turned out to be just as gorgeous as his profile picture, and Luis had another pang of guilt for placing yet another innocent person in danger of being eaten just for the sake libido and company. But the less human part of Luis brain, the aspect of himself that was all primal instinct and cold pragmatism, didn’t see why that danger should get in the way of shelter, sex, and free food?

The corners of Luis' mouth drew up into a knowing smirk as he closed the door behind him, enjoying the randy tension in the coy game these types of meetups often started. “Sure.” Luis placed his backpack against the wall by the door. “Hey uh....are you the ghostuber dude by the way?” 

If it hadn't already been obvious from the risque Grindr conversation, then the grin tugging at the edges of Luis' lips confirmed to Connor that this lad was well up for it. He doubted it would take them too long to get down to business. "Right, we've got got beer, shots, cider, whatever you want, mate." He helped himself to a White Claw, handing Luis whatever he'd chosen. "Heh, Ghostuber dude," he chuckled. This was why he didn't send dick pics with his face in them. He didn't want it to end up on twitter or reddit once someone realised who he was. "Y'know what? I like that. Might nick it for my instagram bio.” He gave him a little grin. “I wanna ask what you do for work but I don’t even know how much you wanna talk and stuff. I never know how personal folks wanna get.”

“I mean there’s part of me that just wants to jump your bones,” Luis confessed as he leaned forward to accept a White Claw with a wink, the werewolf perhaps being a bit more literal then the words necessarily implied. But Luis didn’t necessarily want to give that primal part of more leeway over his life then it already had.

“But I don’t mind talking,” Luis admitted helping himself to a seat on one end of the couch. “I’m hiking cross country,” was a rather selective version of the truth. “So I’m just taking whatever work I can find along the way here y’know?”

In spite of being in media and in the public eye just enough to receive decently regular flirtation, Connor wasn't always the smoothest at this. He gave a kind chuckle, toasting their White Claws together. "That's very flattering, but yeah, we can talk. Come on." He gestured for Luis to follow him, heading onto the deck and lighting up the fire pit and sitting on the outdoor bench. "Figured this'd be a bit better than watching telly," he snickered. "So are you in White Crest for long then? Just passing through?" 

Luis had been an easygoing and social person before his life had become a runway train of carnage. Connor definitely had the sexy British angle for him, and a sinewy muscularity to go with the baby face, but perhaps was a bit blunt for coy games. Though Luis couldn’t (or didn’t want to) explain why, his sense of hearing and smell had sharpened to the point of being painful at times. He caught the fragrance of the soaps that Connor had used in the shower as his host passed by and listened to the steady background noise of his heartbeat. 

As they went out on the deck Luis looked out over the East End evening. The sun was sinking like a golden torch in the Whye River's horizon, staining the tufty lines of Stratocumulus clouds ablaze with bright magenta against the deeper blues and violets of the upper atmosphere. East End’s upscale houses and shops trailed off at the harbor where ships slept on a liquid mirror of the sky, seeming to bob up and down on cloudy stained glass. Boat masts and pier poles stood out stark like thin black columns against the prismatic sunset.  

But though Luis’ couldn’t see most of those colors anymore, the shadows of the sunset city strangely didn’t impede his sight at all. Luis glanced to smile playful at Connor, the fading light briefly reflecting off the tapetum lucidum blue in his eyes in a flare of electric blue. 

“That’s what I’m trying to figure out,” Luis admitted as he leaned his elbows on the deck rail, breathing in the faint scents of fish and smoke on the chilly autumn air. “Got this gig at a fighting ring, doing Cutman work and whatnot for the fighters,” he mused. “Guess we’ll see how well that pays huh?”

"Bit of an amateur boxer or something, are you? That's pretty hot," Connor said with a smile. Most people's Grindr photos didn't leave that much to the imagination. There was usually at the very least a topless selfie in there, maybe a post-workout pic, complete with sweatpants bulge. Luis had a casually athletic build, more compact and slightly bulkier than Connor's slimmer frame. He imagined Luis being able to hold his own. "I... couldn't fight my way out of a paper bag. Have to talk my way out, hope they fall for the accent. This is all for show." He looked at Luis' bright blue eyes with a self-deprecating smile. 

"Well, this place is fuckin' weird, which is why I'm here, but it's not for everyone." In the back of his mind, he was still kind of suspect about the eating wolfsbane thing, but Connor left that alone. He actually wanted to get off with the bloke tonight, not scare him away by interrogating him. "Smoke?" he asked, pulling out a pack of tobacco and everything else he needed for a good joint. 

“Luis shook his head with an aimable wrinkle of the nose at the notion. Learning to fight hadn’t been something he’d willingly picked up or enjoyed, but it came naturally to the less human part of him, way too much so honestly. “A cutman is just the dude who makes sure the fighters don’t bleed out too much,” he explained, finding it wiser to not going into detail what sort of illicit fights would just hire some rando off the street who knew his way around an enswell. “I try not to get into fights if I can help it,” said the fellow whose rap sheet contained a bit too many charges of manslaughter for that claim to be entirely plausible. “You’re better off avoiding it honestly dude. Like...I dig some macho dom vibes much as the next guy, but that aggro life isn’t worth it,” confessed Luis, having woken up too often amongst grotesque carnage to glorify violence.

“It is weird,” Luis admitted with another look out at White Crest’s innocently picturesque panorama stretching out beyond them. “Guess that works for a ghostuber though?” Luis didn’t believe in spirits or magic, but a metaphysics argument wasn’t he wan’t to get up to with Connor tonight, so he just let that be. 

Then it turned out Connor knew the way to heart: weed. “Duuude, you must be into some weird shit if you’re buttering me up this much,” he teased with an assenting nod.

“Oh,” Connor said with a chuckle, feeling just a little bit stupid. “I guess that makes sense. It’s in the name.” Hearing that Luis avoided fights if he could help it only made Connor more attracted to him. He had no patience for that toxic masculinity bullshit. Knowing someone could defend themselves was one thing, being good at a sport was another, but seeking violence for violence’s made someone the type of person best avoided, even for a one night stand. “Yeah, couldn’t agree more. Save the macho dom vibes for the bedroom,” he teased, rolling them each a joint with a grin. 

“The views are fucking gorgeous too, I mean, look at this ocean.” He gestured to the sand and sea that spread out before them, glistening under the moon and stars. “And I never run out of stuff to film.” Even if sometimes, the thing he happened to film was someone being murdered in the woods. That’d be a mood killer, though. His grin only widened when Luos accepted his offer of some light recreational drug use. “What can I say? I like being a good host.” And once he handed Luis the rolled joint, he leaned in for a brief kiss, lips brushing against Luis’ and lingering for barely a moment before he sat back to light up, handing Luis the lighter too. 

The lighter’s flame was a momentary spark against the oceanic sunset as Luis breathed deep. Substances had come to be Luis’ escape from the train of violence his life had become, and the unwilling werewolf closed his eyes and breathed smoke into the night for a time, letting it soak into his blood and cloud out unwelcome thoughts. “Definitely gorgeous,” he affirmed, before turning away from the sea. 

Luis gently lowered himself down to straddle Connor’s lap. He looked down into Connor’s eyes for a moment with a questioning raise of tawny brows, silently asking if this was ok. “So what made you want to do youtubing stuff,” Luis asked with an unconvincingly innocent smirk as he ran both hands up the front of Connor’s shirt. Luis played it slow, his splayed fingers consciously tracing the lines of Connor’s body beneath the fabric, traveling up until he caressed the bare skin of the Brit’s neck. He leaned forward from his perch on Connor’s lap to meet his host’s lips in a long kiss, taking time to just savor the take and smell of him before parting with a breath chuckle. “So were you legit born in England,” he asked in a murmur, pulling down the front of Connor’s shirt slightly to press his lips to the firm skin of Connor’s pectorals. “Or are you actually some Cali-boy whose doing the Brit thing for sex appeal.” Luis continued to lay exploring kisses up the curves Connor’s upper chest and neck as he glanced up. “Won’t mind either way,” he assured with a grin. 

Connor closed his eyes for a moment as he inhaled the joint and blew out the smoke, watching it dissipate into the night. He took another sip of his beer, not expecting the next events that unfolded, but certainly appreciating them. His breath hitched in anticipation as he felt the warm weight of the other man's body on top of him. He lifted his hands to wander over Luis' upper legs and waist. "Started to video journal for myself," he answered, closing his eyes again and sighing as Luis' hands and lips caressed his skin. He curled his own fingers into Luis' sides, sliding them just beneath his shirt. "Ran out of space on my hard drive, started uploading them to YouTube," he snickered. "And the rest is history." 

Thankfully the neighbours' houses weren't right on top of them and there was a bit of space between the houses along the beach, so he didn't feel too self-conscious about the display they were putting on. At least for now. "I'm a born and raised South West London boy, darling," he whispered, playfully exaggerating his own accent. "What about you?" he asked, fingertips tracing tiny lines along Luis' abs. "Hispanic?" 

“Chicano,” Luis confirmed with a nod, closing his eyes for a moment and just letting Connor touch bring on a trembling flex of his abdomen that brought a hitch to his breathing. “South Texas chico my dude,” he elaborated in a teasing imitation of Conner’s phrasing, as if the Coastal Bend was somehow on the same cultural tier as an ancient city of eight point nine million. Luis shrugged off his white cotton shirt onto the deck, ignoring the chilled autumn air as it brought goosebumps along his bare skin. Luis’ shoulders and chest rose and fell with deepened breaths as drank in the scent of Connor and the taste of his lips with a hungry insistence.  

A voice in the part of Luis' brain warned that he needed restraint. He needed to not lose control here.

“So why ghosts,” Luis asked as he reluctantly parted from Connor. He kept running one hand affectionately though his date’s hair while leaning back to take another drag from the joint he’d left on the railing. “You could easily get internet-famous with other stuff,” he pointed with, exhaling smoke at one end of a smile that left the ‘other stuff’ ambiguous. 

Connor’s stomach tightened and he felt himself becoming more and more aroused, especially as Luis pulled off his shirt. His own was unbuttoned all the way down to the navel, so he unfastened the rest of it, letting it hang open to reveal his chest and stomach. For a moment, he thought they were going to shag right there on the decking, but thankfully (at least for the neighbour’s sake), Luis pulled away to take another drag, smoking from his position straddling Connor’s lap. “Right, you’re one to talk about sexy accents then. You can get anyone to drop their trousers by saying romantic shit in Spanish,” Connor teased, continuing his own beer and joint. 

“Why ghosts?” He repeated. It felt like he was about to open a can of worms, so he did his best to put the pushy, opinionated part of him aside, at least for the sake of getting his dick wet tonight. “Ah, well, suppose you’re either a believer or you’re not. Hard to believe in ghosts when you can’t see them. I just happen to be someone who can.” His fingers absentmindedly continued drawing shapes on Luis’ forearm as he spoke. 

The claim about his ability to make people drop drow with Spanish elicited a snorting laugh from Luis, who’d endured less complimentary claims about his background in the past. He pressed his lips to the skin about the hem of Connor’s pants, laying teasing kisses along the muscled v-shape below the Brit’s abdominals, toying with his tongue down the very edge of the curve before relenting. 

“Te voy a joder los sesos guey,” Luis promsied with a soft murmmer in Connor’s ear. 

Connor’s answer clearly brought Luis up short, confusion mixing with the more straightforward lust on his features. Luis wasn’t particularly good at it, but could pick up sometimes when people lied sometimes. The beat of their heart changed. Even though they were skin to skin Luis hadn’t heart any falter in Connor’s aroused pulse. Maybe Luis wasn’t really in any headspace beyond screwing this guy, but it sounded like he thought he was telling the truth.  

Luis sat up on Connor’s lap for a moment and looked at him with reflective blue eyes that grew brighter at the darkness deepened, lips in cast in a half frown of vexation and both hands lifted behind his head. 

“Shit, don’t even know what to fucking make of you Con,” Conner mumbled after a while, the frown broadening in a toothy smile. Luis stood up and reached down for Conner’s hand with a come-hither look that made clear Luis’ personal suggestion to resolve this quandary. 

“Oh, bloody hell,” Connor murmured under his breath, jeans tightening as he got hard when Luis kissed and licked along his pelvic bone. He’d had a few flings in town, and it hadn’t exactly been that long since his rendezvous with Nell, but there was something incredibly alluring about Luis, the way he took what he wanted, unapologetic and confident, just a little filthy, behind a blue-eyed cherubic face you could take home to your mum. “You’re the kind of lad I could take home to family dinner and give you a blowjob in the bathroom after,” he chuckled. 

Connor ran his fingers through Luis’ light brown hair, tugging it gently as his fist clenched with arousal. “I have no clue what you just said, but it was sexy as hell,” he snickered, practically pulling Luis back to his lips so he could kiss him more firmly, more deeply, more desperately. When their lips parted, his breath caught in his throat, and he twisted the joint out in the ashtray. “Why don’t we go inside and you can make whatever you want of me?” 

Luis let himself be led back to Connor’s bedroom, putting up coy resistance at times, pretending to look around the house with wide innocent eyes but wearing a cruelly teasing smirk. One hand in Connor’s and the other tracing the lined of the cool-colored walls, Luis let the adrenaline of anintipation buoy him up like a chemical tidal wave. For a little while he was just a normal guy horny out of his mind and climbing into a hot brit’s bed. 

There came a cracking sound from somewhere outside the room, like a piledriver being used as a nutcracker. 

Luis jerked up instinctively as it hit his lupine hearing like a gunshot, looking around. “Did you...”  But the sound had stopped or maybe hadn’t existed. Fuck it. “Nevermind,” he murmured, busying him with trying to make out with Connor and get unzip his pants at the same time. 

Connor headed inside, kicking off his shoes and leaving them deserted somewhere in the hall. He threw his shirt on top of the laundry basket, climbing on top of the bed with Luis. He heard nothing, ears not as keen as the werewolf, and let himself be in ignorant bliss for a while. They continued to kiss, leaving him with tousled hair and pants half-unfastened, blood rushing between his legs as they got hotter and heavier. “What?” he whispered against a jawline that could cut glass, but whatever Luis had heard, he’d quickly forgotten. 

He whispered compliments, sighs and groans against Luis’ skin, hands wandering his torso. Their bodies were warm against one another as Connor pressed into him, haphazardly reaching to unfasten his belt before he heard it, an obnoxious sound, miniature saw blades gnawing away beneath him. “What the..” he mumbled, narrowing his eyes and looking at Luis as if to question if he was losing his bloody mind. He rolled over, begrudgingly separating himself to look under the bed. “Oh, FUCK.” Connor scrambled back on the bed, scrambling for the closest object to throw on top of the creature. He was trying to get his rocks off, and there was a fucking demon rat under his bed. 

“Dude…please...” Luis moaned, breathing fast and craving release with all this built up tension. He tried to pull Connor back down to him, skin flush and burning with the raw need that turned every nerve into a livewire. 

But before either batter or pitcher could make the final run towards home base, one corner of the bed vanished in a cloud of sawdust. There was the sound of claws scaping up wood, and Luis choked on another flurry of dry sawdust in his mouth, dust clinging to the sweat on his skin 

Luis found himself face to face with an obese beaver-shrew the size of a dog at the ruined end of the bed, and wondered for a surreal second if he’d gone insane from sheer Blue-Balls. 

“What….holy shit….whu…”

Connor really, truly would have preferred to just stay in bed and take the rest of Luis’ clothes off, doing unspeakable things to one another for the next several hours before having another cigarette and maybe sneak in some cuddling. White Crest, however, had other plans. “Bro! What the fuck--” He scrambled to fasten his pants, willing his boner to go down, which thankfully wasn’t too difficult “You little bugger, I rent this house!” He didn’t know if it was dangerous or not, so he instinctively grabbed for Luis to pull him away, then scrambled for the nearest pair of flip flops. “We gotta go, dude. I have no idea what that thing is.” 

Why...how did this rat have horns? Even while gagging on sawdust and woodchips Luis could smell that this thing wasn’t a dog, rat, squirrel, shrew, or beaver. His rational mind recognized it was impossible that a person could smell that well, but his instincts just sorta knew on a gut level that this wasn’t any animal he’d ever seen before. There was a moment of confusion as his brain and gut disagreed on what was going on. But as usual when shit went down, guts won out. 

Luis let Connor pull him away and he rolled off the side of the bed not occupied by a giant woodchipper on legs. Stumbling into the shoes he’d shed at the bedroom door, he sprinted with Connor through the house and out the front door, the frigid outside air extinguishing the amorous fire in his skin. 

Great. This was just great. He’d found a nice, handsome, and incredibly seductive boy to take to bed, and now he had an infestation of God-Knows-What chewing on his furniture. Connor shook his head, more annoyed than panicked. “I’m so sorry. This is--not what I planned for tonight. I have to call an exterminator.” Or a hunter. “But… this was nice, before it got ruined. I’ll call you, okay?” And with that, he pulled out his phone. 

[thisiswhatwereupagainst]

TL;DR Went into Captain Britain and Excalibur just to read Meggan, expected to hate Brian, found out they both were bad to each other and are both very injured, traumatized characters grappling with gender norms in their own way, and I have a lot of sympathy and love for them BOTH now even if they definitely are not a good couple at this point. So, I am keenly interested in Meggan Puceanu as a character and a concept. Just learning some very basic things about her prompted THIS META POST three years ago. And that was before I really plunked down and decided to read all her stuff in order. And while I have yet to read ALL of it by a longshot. But I’ve gotten through about 20 issues now, from her first appearances in “The Mighty World of Marvel” in 1984, to meeting and joining up with Brian Braddock/Captain Britain in the second series of Captain Britain in 1985, to the first five issues of Excalibur in 1985. So yeah, keep in mind reading this, I am only up to Excalibur #5. And I know I probably should wait before writing all this stuff, read more, see if my interpretations hold true. But I have so many thoughts and I just can’t wait that long! So please read on with the understanding I may be proven completely wrong in these perceptions later. That said.... I had some basic knowledge of Brian and Meggan’s dynamic. I knew that she was completely emotionally dependent on him, that her every emotion hinged on his approval and attention, that a lot of her very identity was based around pleasing him as his girlfriend. I also knew he’d been a real dick to her, and that his descent into alcoholism had made him an even bigger dick. So, I was really prepared to dislike him. And while I do still dislike the power imbalance that their relationship was founded on, I ended up having very different feelings about Brian himself than I expected---I thought I was going to encounter a shitty macho man himbo asshole who treated Meggan like shit just because. Seriously, look at THIS and THIS and THIS! What a JERK! I was all prepped to despise this guy and yell about toxic masculinity and how Meggan deserved better. Instead, what I found was someone who was as broken and in pain as Meggan herself, but who got far less sympathy for it than she did, both from other characters and from fans. The first big shock that I got was that Brian had been raped twice by female villains in the second Captain Britain series, before Excalibur began. I had actually read about this a couple years ago on TV Tropes, but seeing it was something else. I wrote a longer post about it HERE As noted in the post, Brian never told anyone about either of these incidences as far as I know, nor getting any kind of therapy or treatment. He also started drinking after this happened. And as of Excalibur beginning, Betsy is dead (or so he believes) and he’s grappling a lot with that too. I think it was unethical of him not to rebuff Meggan when she first came on to him, for reasons I’ll discuss later in this post, but also makes sense for his character, not because he’s an unethical person but because he’s actually very passive and seems to just accept whatever is demanded by him of others; he talks about this with Courtney, how he has no choice in being Captain Britain, how it was imposed on him, asking if he’s a coward for just wanting a little of his own life and she unsympathetically says it’s “obscene” how he “can’t be bothered” to “take charge” of his own life (Excalibur #3). It’s a very unusual flaw for a male character. In his own way, he’s at the mercy of what others demand him to be as much as Meggan is with her powers, and I find that really interesting. I already knew that Meggan is very much a reflection of the demands placed on women by society, literally twisting her own emotions and physical forms to coincide with what is considered beautiful and what others desire, whereas Brian, it turns out, is himself a reflection of the demands placed on men---he has to be a warrior, whether he likes it or not (and he doesn’t, it’s part of his backstory that he doesn’t see himself that way at all), he has to be the hero and take care of the girl and he feels he has to just go with it when Meggan decides he’s her man and she needs him. And Meggan is more flawed than I expected. She’s oftentimes shockingly selfish in her obsession with Brian. For instance, when his ex Courtney is kidnapped by the sadistic murderous Arcade, Brian is understandably upset, and this troubles Meggan because she thinks that his being upset means he still cares for Courtney. The selfishness there is staggering; a woman’s life is in danger and Meggan’s first concern is her own love life, and she assumes that the only reason Brian could care about said woman’s life being in danger is if he’s in love with her. Or when Brian’s drinking is first brought up by the rest of the team, Meggan says it hurts her that he turns to those bottles instead of to her (Excalibur #3). So, her problem isn’t that Brian is obviously becoming addicted to alcohol, it’s that SHE isn’t the one that he turns to. She’s got a lot of moments like this. That said, I LIKE this about Meggan. It makes me like her MORE. It makes her WAY more realistic and flawed and human than the archetypical frail damsel who is just an accessory to her man that I was expecting. She’s clingy, she’s possessive, she’s downright nasty and hostile over him a lot! She may not think of herself as a real person, but the writers treat her as one, complete with flaws. Her dependency isn’t treated as a good or romantic thing either, it’s not held up as a female virtue like I was expecting; Brian is actually bothered by it, he confides in Kurt that he doesn’t think he can handle how she relies on him for everything, how he actually PREFERS Courtney because unlike Meggan, Courtney is her own woman-- “She doesn’t seem to NEED me as completely and desperately as Meggan seems to. Sometimes I feel I’m the total and absolute focus of Meggan’s life. It’s a responsibility I don’t think I’m capable of handling.” And Brian is right, this ISN’T a good thing to do in a relationship, Meggan is putting a lot of unfair emotional weight on his shoulders, and he’s already got a lot to bear from his own trauma and loss. In fact, one could even argue that her behavior would be seen as toxic if the genders were reversed. She’s still very sympathetic, of course, because this is coming from a place of real insecurity and need and probably her powers too, but it’s more three-dimensional and complicated than what I originally expected. But I like that. Because again, it’s more realistic, both in terms of Meggan’s behavior and in Brian’s reaction to it---he doesn’t WANT a woman being totally dependent on him and thinking the sun shines out his ass and needing him for everything, he wants another human being. That’s not what I expected a Bad Macho Man Stereotype to be saying! But in fact, Brian says another thing he prefers about Courtney is “she’s her own woman” and  “I can talk to her, Kurt.” (Excalibur #5) Brian is a man who wants to be able to have someone he can be VULNERABLE with, to talk with as an equal about his fears and anxieties---which he does with Courtney, as mentioned---and he can’t do that with Meggan because of the pedestal she puts him on and her needing so much care herself. He says as much himself to Kurt. He also recognizes that he himself probably isn’t equipped to deal with Meggan’s issues, she needs much more help than he can give. This isn’t an idealized thing at all, this is a realistic depiction of two very emotionally injured people in a very messed up dynamic that is bad for BOTH of them, hurting them BOTH. Up til actually reading it, I was expecting it to be one-sided, with Meggan being the only one suffering, but it’s not! And Meggan being like this, of being obsessed with Captain Britain and behaving in a very “cliche” way over him, makes a TON of sense for her, she’s not just obsessed with him for no reason like a typical “just the hero’s girlfriend” character. Meggan grew up being kept secret in her family’s camper-trailer for her then-monstrous appearance, til during the Jasper’s Warp when reality shifted into a world that was putting superhumans, including herself, into concentration camps. While she was in the camps, Captain Britain was a legend as a liberator and freedom fighter who was fighting back against the regime for the sake of people like her. And when reality returned to normal, Meggan was one of the few people who remembered that it had ever changed; she remembered the camps, and she remembered Captain Britain. Even though she’d never even seen him at that point, she clung to him as her one hope. Then the real Captain Britain found her when she was homeless and living in an abandoned warehouse, and he lets her live with him in his mansion because she has nowhere else, which is probably more kindness than she’s ever been shown in her life, and from someone she idolized. Which, as I said way earlier in this essay, does make their relationship an inherently unethical one because of their power imbalance, as he’s got a lot of power over her in terms of being the one providing her with a home, food, clothing, etc., not to mention her emotional dependency that’s obvious well before she makes a move on him. So we’re already starting on really problematic territory. But it makes SENSE for her. Add to that Meggan was raised on television in a VERY literal sense. Again, she was locked up in her camper trailer all day every day her whole life, and so she spent most of her time just watching TV. It’s shown that this has given her SOME UNREALISTIC IDEAS ABOUT HOW TO BEHAVE so I think that absorbing the media’s depictions of how women are “supposed” to behave towards their men is actually pretty realistic. She’s not doing this because the writers think this is just how women are----NONE of the other female characters act at all like she does!---but because SHE thinks it’s what’s normal and expected, and she’s probably very much imprinted on the media’s fantasy fairytale depiction of relationships. Given how she grew up as an ugly monster and seeing herself as such, I can very much see her as latching on the idea of “beautiful sweet woman who is valued for her beauty and being with the lead man and has no identity apart from that” that’s prevalent in media, which she would take for a reflection of reality, a reality that she thought her whole life would be denied to her. So all her behavior has a good in-character reason; she could even be read as a criticism of trying to enact gendered media stereotypes in real life and how they can’t actually work in the complexity of the real world, and how damaging they are to those who absorb them. What’s also funny is that despite appearing to be the standard “strong man, pretty woman” couple, especially with Brian becoming emotionally distant and cruelly pushing her away whilst she’s very emotional and obsessed with pleasing him, is they actually subvert this paradigm as much as they play it straight. The Juggernaut WIPES THE FLOOR with Brian at one point, and then Meggan shows up, shapeshifts into a GIANT MUSCULAR VERSION OF HERSELF, and comes to his rescue with Rachel and Kitty! That’s right, a buff lady and two other ladies save the dude in distress! And then afterwards, she acts like SHE was the one in danger, resuming her default petite form and jumping into his big manly arms while he asks if she’s alright and she says “Always in your arms!” ---it’s hilarious! (Excalibur #3) And of course, speaking of subverting gender stereotypes, there’s Brian’s desire to have a partner he can be vulnerable with, which is really astounding to me----he’s very much grappling with the expectations of toxic masculinity in a way that’s harming him as much as Meggan. Not just in relation to Meggan, but also, as mentioned before, in relation to not having control of his own life as Captain Britain, and being responsible for others. In particular, he’s messed up over Betsy’s (seeming) death, and over not having protected her, as a man would be expected to protect his sister. In the panel right before the “changeling cow!” scene I linked earlier, THIS IS WHAT HE SAYS. He doesn’t see himself as any good if he doesn’t meet impossible standards. And while Meggan reacts to pain by getting teary, Brian consistently reacts to his pain (or trying to hide it) by getting ANGRY, which is consistent with how women vs men are socialized. Which is not to say it’s anything but VISCERALLY HORRIBLE when he lashes out at Meggan, especially given how dependent she is on him, and she absolutely SHOULD have dumped his ass then, but it’s also a lot more three-dimensional than the emotionally abusive drunken bad boyfriend stereotype I was expecting.  I know I’m a broken record on this, but I am just so shocked at how sympathetic I ended up being to a guy I was so prepared to hate and was so cruel to a character (Meggan) that I was already very sympathetic to and invested in. Instead, I’m invested in them BOTH now and want to see them BOTH heal from this, and from each other. So, basically, I was really ready to be mad about Meggan’s lack of agency and her dependence on Brian. And these are things that happen. But the writers are clearly AWARE of it, and treat them as issues to be addressed and overcome. Meggan and Brian come off not as the cliche male and female stereotypes they first appeared, and that I expected, but very critical examinations and sometimes subversions of them, and both are shown as being hurt by the expectations of their gender, and being hurt by each other as they enact those expectations. It’s not totally perfect, not by a long shot, but it’s very interesting and a lot more nuanced than I expected some straight white guys in the 80s to be writing, it’s definitely a far cry from the typical idealized relationship between a hero and a leading lady, and I’m pretty impressed with it. And I’m looking forward to reading more.

[clareisa]

Smut Prompt Requests

⚠️NOT MINE⚠️ - original post ⬇️

- open for any idol of your choice

- 1 or 2 or (max) 3 idols

- 1 or (max) 2 prompts

-------------------------------------------

CEO!AU:

1.“Come on, admit it, you sit at your little desk all day and she walks in and out and all you want to do is fuck that tight little ass of hers, don’t you?”

2.“Can you please fuck me, sir?”

3.“I wore my naughty little skirt just for you Mr.(idol of choice) and I think you’d like to know…I’m not wearing any panties.”

4."Mr.(Idol of choice), I see how you look at me, I know you want to fuck me...but, how would your wife respond?"

5."Seriously? You spilled coffee on my slacks? Clean it up."

6."Some would call it exploiting my powers but I need to see which one of you is really ready to do anything for the company."

7."You're sleeping with the CEO of the company? No wonder you got that promotion your second month here!"

8."Are you sure you want to do this here? I mean you have no curtains and the whole office would be able to see us..."

9."You've been such a naughty secretary, trying to seduce your boss...well, it's working,"

10."You've been hired to help the boss relieve some stress...he'll see you in his office now."

Male!Dom:

11."Swallow daddy's dick, make him cum and maybe, maybe he'll reward you."

12.“One cock is never enough for this slut, even with your cock in her pussy…she’s begging for one in her ass.”

13.“Move your hand! I’m not stopping-this is what you asked for, now be a good little slut and take it.”

14.“Keep testing my patience and you won’t be able to sit for the next month and every time you go to slide on some shorts or jeans you’ll grimace remembering how hard I had to spank your ass, all because you couldn’t listen.”

15.“Imagine being fucked so good, your eyes roll to the back of your head and you drool a little.”

16.“If you’re not screaming my name at the top of your lungs then I’m doing something wrong.”

17.“Some good dick can turn any good girl into a naughty girl.”

18.“Daddy needs you, princess. Daddy needs your mouth so bad.”

19.“You’re so relentless. All I asked was for you to wait until we got home and you couldn’t even do that! You are so in for it tonight.”

20.“Say it! Say it loud! Let everyone know who’s fucking this pussy right.”

21.“I don’t think you understand how much I want to bend you over the nearest surface and fuck some sense into you.”

22.“Your tits bounce with each thrust…fuck you’re so sexy!”

23.“You’ve never had your pussy eaten? No, I refuse to believe no one has eaten this sweet cunt.”

24.“I love watching you throw it back on me,  always so eager for my cock.”

25.“You’ve been such a good girl, maybe daddy will finally fuck that whore ass of yours.”

26.“You try to act all innocent but I know what you really are. A cock craving whore, that’s what.”

27.“Your panties are soaked little girl, I guess you like the idea of me taking what I want.”

28.“You gonna cry and moan while I run into that virgin cunt?”

29.“Face down. Ass up. Spread that pretty little pussy for me.”

30.“You know the dick’s good when you can nothing but lay there and take it.”

31.“Are you a swallower? Yes? Good because I want you to swallow every drop of cum I’m going to give you.”

32. “I know, deep down, you’re a filthy little slut who likes to take cock deep down her throat.”

33. “Be loud. Scream for daddy, let the others know you’re mine and only mine.”

34. “You’re acting out…so, give me one good reason why I shouldn’t fold you in half right here and fuck the shit out of you.”

35. “I’m tired of you being so gentle and soft. I want you to treat me like a princess and fuck me like a whore!”

36. “I’m tired of acting like I don’t want you, and you don’t want me…just pin me against a wall and fuck me already.”

37.“Does me touching you excite you this much? You’re literally dripping.”

38.“I have a confession…I like to be choked, and not just your hand wrapped around my throat…like, choke me until my vision blurs.”

Overstimulation:

39.“You look so pretty tied up, your clit forced against that vibrator…cum for me, princess, cum for me.”

40."I-I can't. My thighs are shaking so hard and even the slightest breeze across my slit is making me shake daddy, I can't take anymore."

41."Three orgasms and you're still as hard as a rock and your balls are blue as hell. What do you want me to do, baby, how can I help?"

42."Fuck me, daddy! Fuck my used and abused cunt."

43."Two orgasms isn't enough for you? You need three? Of course, you do! You're a little cock craving slut,"

44."I have a confession, god if I weren't so fucking drunk I don't think I'd even consider telling you this but...sometimes all I want to do is tie you up and make you cum again and again until all you can do is lay there, trembling, begging me to stop."

Public/Semi-Public:

45.“We can’t! The others are here!”

46.“So what! This is my apartment and I’ll fuck you whenever and wherever I want.”

47.“Tell me how it feels being at a public event ass filled with your favorite vibrating butt plug.”

48. “Ah fuck! No! No, we shouldn’t be doing this. Well, not here at least…”

49.“Really? Couldn't you wait until we got home? You needed me so bad, that you’re going to fuck me in a public bathroom?”

Cum Play/Breeding:

50.“I’m going to fill your pussy with every inch of my cock, and then I’m going to cum deep inside your pussy. I’m going to breed you…you want that, you little slut?”

51." This is a perfect position, legs spread wide, cock buried deep in your pussy, you're going to get every drop of cum I have to offer."

52."Can you feel it, how heavy my balls are? I haven't cum in three weeks because you're so fucking stubborn, Y/N, please touch me."

53."A bet's a bet, and I won, so you know what that means. I get to fill you with my cum, anywhere hole of my choosing."

54."I love how you sit there, tongue out, waiting for my load.  Such a pretty, obedient whore."

55."You're going to go back out there and sit at your desk in your cubicle, dripping with my cum like the good girl you are."

56."Your pussy looks so pretty, especially when it's covered in my cum."

57."You feel how thick my cock is? Fucking your tight walls? I'm knotting you, baby, knotting this pretty pussy of yours and then I'm going to fill you to the hilt with my cum."

Hook-Ups:

58.“I just want to know how your dick would feel inside of me.”

59.“Desire is a nasty little thing.”

60.“I-is that a hickey?”

61.“Were you two just fucking? You two were totally just fucking!”

62.“I heard the best way to get over someone was to get under someone.”

63."Yes, I know it's two in the morning, but I'm stressing over finals and tuition and when I'm with you, all those things go away..."

64."I can't believe we had sex, you're my TA!"

Fem!Dom:

65.“It’s kind of embarrassing to admit but my cock gets so hard when I think of you noona, you make me such a leaky mess.”

66.“As much as I would love for you to fuck me…I need to know if you’re going to last.”

67.“Good boy, you had so much cum for me. I can feel it dripping down my thighs!”

68.“Good boys share.”

69.“You don’t have to act all macho, no one’s expecting it from you…be the sub I know you are.”

70.“Now, be a good boy and clean my cunt of his cum.”

71.“Admit it. Even when you’re not fucking me, all you can think about is fucking me.”

72.“What do I want you to do? I want you to eat my cunt until I’m shaking.”

73.“Don’t be embarrassed…I think it’s hot you get so hard when something’s filling your ass.”

74.“The sight of you, on your knees, tongue fucking my pussy is too much! Seeing you submit in such a way is so fucking hot.”

Voyeurism/2+:

75.“You like my friends, slut? I know they like you.”

76.“Go ahead, tell em, baby, tell them how you loved to be covered/filled with cum.”

77.“Interestingly enough, (idol of choice), just told me he gets off to the thought of you…I thought maybe we could help him out. Give him the real thing.”

78.“I’m honestly so jealous of (idol of choice), he gets to come home and fuck you after tour…”

79.“Go ahead, taste how sweet her pretty pussy is.”

80.“I see the way you look at (idol of choice) and I know you want him…go! Go and ask him to fuck your little whore pussy.”

81.“Come on princess, put on a show for me and (idol of choice), we miss you and your tight cunt so much.”

82. “Me and my friends have had a hellish week, help us relieve some of our stress, princess.”

83. “It’s my turn…I’m going to fuck his cum deep into your tight, little pussy.”

84.“I’m not going to lie…I’ve gotten off a few times thinking of having my every hole filled with cock.”

85.“Fuck! Is it bad I’m so hard watching someone else fuck your dirty cunt?”

86.“You look so much prettier with my member/friend’s cum on your face.”

87.“You’re going to let me fuck your pink pussy, while your boyfriend’s watching? God, you are such a naughty girl.”

Anal Play:

88.“I’m going to tear this little ass in two, and you’re going to do nothing but lay there and take it.”

89.“I want you to fuck my ass daddy/mommy, I’m your little anal slut.”

90.“I am so wet at the thought of your thick cock filling my ass.”

91."I am a straight man who loves to have his ass fucked."

92."The plug isn't even, I need another cock, please, please fill my ass with another cock."

93."I don't know, most guys deny and deny this some more but to be honest with you...there's nothing I love more than tongue-fucking an asshole."

Fem/Male!Dom:

94.“All these girls/guys, they try to get you to come home with them. Little do they it’s my name you’re chanting so loud that by the end of the night you can’t even speak.”

95.“I just want you to know…even though you’ve been a good girl/boy tonight, I’m going to tie you up and punish you just for my amusement.”

96.“I see the way you look at me…and it’s very inappropriate, Mr. (Idol’s last name)

97.“I like this, your hands above your head, your body completely at my/our mercy.”

98.“It’s that look, that look of innocence on your face, it makes me want to tear you into two.”

Orgasm Denial:

99.“Trust me denial is your friend. When you finally get to cum, it’ll feel so good…I promise.”

100."No, you don't get to cum until I say so. I don't care if you're close if you cum I'm going to punish you."

101."I know it feels good princess, but if you cum daddy is going to spank, not your ass but your pussy, until it's red and you're clenching around nothing, thighs shaking and skin burning, begging me to stop."

102."Are you close baby boy? Yeah? Well, we can't have that, not yet anyway, you haven't earned it."

103."I don't like edging!  I want to cum and I want to cum now."

104."I don't think I like your tone...you better be careful I might not even let you cum tonight."

105."Let us use your holes, fuck you senseless and maybe, only then will one of us make you cum. Deal?"

+Bonus Prompts

106. “Open your eyes. I watch to watch you fall apart.”

107. “Maybe if you kept your mouth shut and knew when to quit you wouldn’t be bent over my lap with your ass raw.”

108. “I’ve never met someone’s who got so wet/hard by the simple fact they’re being praised.”

109. “Were you watching me touch myself? Yes? I kind of knew you were…did you enjoy the show?”

110. “I’m mommy/daddy’s little cumslut prince/princess!”

111. “My pussy is dying to be stuffed by a big, hard cock.”

112. “You can watch if you want…if you’re good, maybe I’ll let you touch…just maybe

113. “My princess is an anal slut and she’s been telling me how much she’d love to have your cock inside of her."

114. “Honestly? She talks about how much she wants to fuck you so I told her to get on her hands and knees and beg.”

115. “It’s sad really…she walks around with no panties on waiting for one of us to fuck her

116. “They call her the blowjob machine…I think the name fits.…”

117. “I’ve never witnessed a man eat pussy like it’s his last meal…I can’t feel my legs."

118. “We’re in a car full of people…why do you decide to sit on my lap and then proceed to move?”

119. “It’s literally the most adorable thing how hard you are from just me kissing you.

120. “You talk too much, sometimes I want to shove my cock down your throat in hopes you shut up.”

[venii-vidii-vicii]

Hey I hope this isn't sudden but I found you through the DE Reddit (seen you around insta too) and thought I would drop my qustions tp you here. 1) what kind of guys do you think Glen likes? 2) if the Hardies seem cool with Glen being gay, why is he still in the closet? 3) what the fuck is wrong with Glen? 4) what's your favorite thing about him? I'm genuinely curious cause I've never seen a background character get this much attention before. Sorry for the multi-questions.

I'm sorry anon but I'm about to drop a long post on you 😔 I just have so many feelings for that man, it's unbelievable.

1) Titus Hardie

That's it.

Jk jk. Idk I kind of see Glen with dudes who are also burly and buff but I also see him with v soft boys. I mean the way the game describes Titus and Glen is that they're basically big buff giants who tower over everyone else, right?

From a psychological aspect I would have to say he probably leans more towards the petite guys because that makes him feel like "The Man" which is the big psychological issue he seems to have in the game. He wants to be a macho guy; He wants to be the dominant one, the strong one, the big guy so that his manliness doesn't get questioned. I can only hypothesize that in his head, being with smaller more feminine men gives him the satisfaction of being the top dog.

Generally though.... Just give him ALLLLLL THE DUDES!!!

2) I don't think anyone actually knows Glen is gay except Titus (and most likely Ruby) as Alain makes a comment about how Ruby likes bo0o0bies more than him. Plus Titus tries to hint it rather than just full on out Glen. He glanced at Glen when he says "some are queerer than others" but no one seems to comment, it either went over their heads (like it did with a lot of players) or they just chose not to say anything out of respect for their bro's privacy in front of stranger cops.

Personally I think some of the Hardie boys are smart enough to already know like Eugene. Alain might know but made the comment as a joke like "she likes tits more than u cuz you're gay lmao" u know?

But seeing the stance Revachol has with LGBTs, I think it's safe to assume that Glen just has too much to lose if he came out. He would most likely be kicked out of the rugby team, and He probably believes that he will lose the Hardies respect.

Again this leads back to his "big man" problem. Media and people in general seem to associate being gay with being feminine or that every gay guy likes to wear make up and dress like a woman. These ideas will stick to Glen and he doesn't wanna be associated with them. He doesn't want to be seen as less of a man.

He doesn't want to be a joke to people.

There's just so much at stake here for him to come out.

After all, the homosexual "UNDERGROUND" is an underground for a reason. They're not welcomed in the surface world.

He has a couple of good things in his life and he could lose everything over night just cuz he decided to tell the world who he really was.

Imagine going from hanging out with your friends every night, being a sport star, getting free beer... to just being alone in your room every day, losing people's respect, your job, losing everything. Not to mention the way others will treat you.

If you were depressed while you still had everything, imagine what it would be like to be depressed and have nothing.

It's tough.

3) a lot.

I can only answer this with my own psychoanalysis of Glen's character with little canon proof so take it with a grain of salt.

I think Glen grew up in a very shitty household with probably an abusive parent(s). The macho manly problem he has probably stemmed from his parent(s) drilling this idea into his head that he has to be a man. His parent(s) might have been close minded homophobes which resulted in Glen just fighting that part of him because he "knows" it's wrong and he shouldn't be feeling romantic things for other men.

Having abusive parent(s) would also explain why Glen is so violent, aggressive, and sadistic. This violence is all he knows and not to mention, being strong is associated with being masculine and manly.

Power makes you a man.

His physical strength is probably an overcompensation for his repressed homosexuality.

He suffers heavily from toxic masculinity and it has really fucked him up.

Of course having to live this way brought a ton more problems. Depression, self loathing, all the shit he tries to numb with beer.

Tbh I think Glen is a bit too hard on himself but it's not easy so I relate to how he feels.

4) my favorite thing about him is how stupid he is. He doesn't understand sarcasm, thinks a fiddle is something gay, and all the repressed homosexual shit he says. My god, he's so fucking stupid it's funny. I love him!

I also admire his strength. Choosing to keep going even after all the fucking shit he has going, it takes a lot of strength. The thought that he even joins the Hardie boys and not goes off to be a psychopathic serial killer is very nice. He might seem fucked up but at least he chose to use his fists for good.

There's still, in his fucked up shattered mind, a desire to be good. To do good. To help save a city that would never accept him. I admire that so much.

He's not a good person, but he's not a bad person. He's literally just human. He's trying to get by in a really shitty place and he wants to help others get by too.

He even shows sympathy sometimes. It's the little stuff that makes me think that he's not completely fucked just yet. There's still enough pieces of him to put his shattered self back together.

(Well had his end been different of course)

TLDR; he likes all dudes, has too much to lose, mommy and daddy issues, and he's dumb but has a good heart.

[blueyesandleatherjacket]

The Fallen, 16/17

Volume: 1.

Number of parts: 16/17.

Pairings: Nine x Rose.

A/N: Tagging @thebookster on her demand.

“We've all fallen, but at the same time we're not broken. There is the hint that we are going to get up again.” - Amy Lee.

CHAPTER 16:

The doctor Nash Grieve hadn’t disappeared. She was still working under Jeremy Backfire’s orders or, should she say, threats, in his mental hospital that was now qualified as the cheapest and worst institution of London and of Great-Britain. However, it was of no importance to the man. The upper part, the public part of the hospital was ruled by one of his trustworthy friends. It was done properly enough to avoid any kind of suspicions that would lead to an in-depth investigation. That would be really problematic. There were things that couldn’t be found underneath the surface. Under the hospital, there was a prison for supernatural beings, a prison built in guts of Earth, buried so deeply for the screams and begs to neve reach the world; a prison but also a laboratory to run experiences on those beings who weren’t considered as beings and were refused all rights. No one knew they were there; no one would ever know they were here. The only one to have escaped was Maxence Spitz. Jeremy Backfire had been furious to find out that his son was gone, even ore when he found out that Maxence was back to his mother and was, consequently, protected. Joanne Spitz was his ex-wife, the woman he had had Maxence with and also the only person on Earth he feared. He would admit such a thing since he was the perfect example of the macho man, all in masculinity and thick mind on certain subjects, but contrarily to most macho men, he was clever enough not to hate on woman. He secretly feared them. Well, only their name was Joanne Spitz. That was why he had never tried to get his hands on Maxence since he was back home despite his burning desire to force him to reveal the Doctor and the Wolf’s secrets. He was fairly certain that Maxence had been helped for his escape. His suspicions were on Nash. She had been the first one to talk to him when he was brought to that hospital. A relationship of trust was born that day, and nothing of what she had done to him on his orders had broken it for some reasons. Jeremy had interviewed her in his office but could get nothing from her. He had taken her in the coloured rooms. He tortured her in every one of them like she had tortured Maxence, still under his orders. He even tortured her dear friend Maya but couldn’t get a word from her. He proved her mind, and was left clueless. The woman who knew everyone and everything about the place couldn’t tell how Maxence had escaped. The Wolf probably managed to get out of here on its own, the human wasn’t clever enough for that. Human were despicable in every single aspect: they were fragile and fell to pieces with the light push of the wind in their back; they were vulnerable to the tiniest of germs that could kill them in a couple of hours; they were limited and powerless, stuck in a weak corporeal shell, unable to use their brain cells to their full capacities. Jeremy had been one of those humans since his birth and had always been frustrated by this condition. Of course this revelation hadn’t hit him before he was a man in his late twenties, about to enter his thirties. It was after Joanne had kicked him out of his house in Manchester. He had moved to London where repeated and unexplained attacks had pushed him to do his own inquiry and soon he found himself obsessing over his need to meet an alien properly. Despite their obvious presence everywhere he was unable to find one. His first encounter with an alien had happened three years ago. At that time, he was well established in London as headmaster of one of the numerous jails of the country, one where all the worst psychotic criminals were locked away. He had rebuilt his life with another woman, was fostering kids. It was hiding the darkness growing in him ever since the birth of his first son but this violence and darkness had taken an unexpected turn when his wife brought a fifteen-year-old teenager from the orphanage she was picking all of her lost causes in. The girl was shy, easily intimidated and had issues being comfortable around anyone. She also had a tattoo – that she called a birth mark she had had since forever – he had seen a couple times before in his researches: she was a hidden shapeshifter. She ignored everything of her true nature, was living as a human, was weak, gullible, easy to manipulate. He had intimidated her, had murmured in her ear at night, made her fall under his complete control. He was human still at that moment but he could feel her fear. He could smell it on her, on her clothes reeked of her sweat, on her skin when his lips brushed over her body, in her words and in her body language when he was around her. He had become obsessed with her, with her body, with her scent… And the idea of her genes had been driving him insane. He literally had had alien material by hand and couldn’t use it, couldn’t do anything of it. He had lost his ability to sleep, spent his night watching her sleeping. Until he couldn’t just sit and stare. He had begun touching her, stroking her skin with the back of his fingers, dropping kisses along her jaw and neckline. She had tried to fight him, tried to defend herself but what could a teenager do against an adult? Who could she talk to? She had nothing and no one to turn to, no one who would believe her. He would have turned everyone against her if she even had tried. He had her in his total control and she was powerless when he had murmured that it was all her fault and had taken her most precious belonging. He had sent her back to the orphanage she was coming from a couple days later, accusing her of being a troublemaker, just before Christmas. A few weeks later, he had found out that she was pregnant, which could have been good news – it meant he would have upgraded the Backfire lineage – if he hadn’t been told that when she had a miscarriage and lost the baby. He had influenced her doctors with enough money for them to give him the dead foetus and also to make sure the young woman would never be able to procreate ever again. If she couldn’t carry his children, she would carry none. It was also another successful attempt to intimidate her so she wouldn’t say a word about what he had done to her. She hadn’t talked, had kept silent when she was interrogated about the incident. She had been suspected to have had sex with another teenager from the orphanage or someone from the outside. It was perfect for him. No one knew about his past – Joanne and Maxence had never talked or filed a complaint, kicking him out was apparently enough – and his reputation was intact. Later, he was promoted headmaster of this mental institute in Peckham that was threatening to close its doors since no one could handle the patients that were locked away in there. He had accepted for the place was presenting all the advantages he had been looking for to continue his researches. The basement contained the remains of the past when torture on the patients was allowed, before it was declared illegal and abandoned there. Perfect. He had drawn new plans for the place, had them done quickly and secretly and soon the basement was equipped with laboratories and rooms for the most difficult patients as he called them. Patients that would be aliens in captivity, but that was his secret. He couldn’t talk about it to anyone before he found the right persons to work with, meaning he had to operate a total reorganisation of the staff. A staff that appeared to be pretty interesting in the end. Many non-terrestrial creatures were hiding in this building, as patients and medical staff. Among them he found what looked like a family of shapeshifters: Nash Grieve, only qualified therapist here, was the oldest; Maya and Oliver Carson were a married couple; and Alex Baxter was Maya’s young brother. He had made sure the two men would be locked away in the new cells of the basement so the women would work for him without causing troubles. They obviously would ignore what was happening to their friends. There were numerous other races of aliens hidden there. He had only kept the most interesting ones and had turned the others into slaves working for him and obeying his every order – unlike Maya and Nash who had a quite rebellious attitude toward him. Rebellious but not suicidal, they knew where to stop. His experiences were going well, and he was testing some alien genes on the scums of this society, improving these lost causes or leaving them to die in terrible pains and getting rid of the bodies in an incinerator. When the results were pleasing to him, he would put his life on the line and improve himself with new genes. It wasn’t without pain but he never felt so strong and so powerful in his entire life. He was enjoying every bit of advantage the alien genes and technologies had and throwing away the inconveniences. But this power wasn’t enough. He needed more, more of all of this, more of species, more experiences. Nash, Maya and company belonged to a special race of shapeshifters; shifters that had been exposed to experiences before. Their genes had been modified so that they could become immortal, so they could heal and ‘regenerate’. A gene he hadn’t been able to reproduce from her DNA, a gene belonging to a no longer existing race. That was when he found out about the Doctor, a lone survivor of the Time War thar had exterminated all of his species and the Daleks. That’s when he found out his son had become the Doctor and was running around the universe as an elusive chimera, a myth, a legend only a few privileged persons had caught sight of. He had been reported to be around London a lot, then spotted in Manchester and back in London where he was caught babbling deliriously before being brought to Jeremy’s institute. Fate was being good on him that day. The Doctor being a prisoner of his hospital without him even trying to catch him – not that he had had the time to think about a strategy to draw him here – and it turned out he had brought an even powerful entity with him called Bad Wolf. This was more than Jeremy could ever have dreamt of. The wheel had turned, he could get his revenge on both his son and ex-wife, and continue his quest for power. First, he had had to steal the patient from Nash who had made it a point of honour to keep him hidden from him even after finding out how dangerous he was and what was his real identity. The Doctor had protected Maxence well for all the time he was there. So did the Wolf. The duo nicely settled down in the head of a human being going mad from such a power had done their best to screw every research he ever did on him. No bit of data was even usable. They had scrambled and faked everything they could before vanishing into thin air, and what they couldn’t have messed with wasn’t giving convincing results. This was why Jeremy was so furious. Had Maxence been a patient here for a longer time, the results would have been much better. But he hadn’t, and worse than that, he had messed with his father’s mind and created damages that had needed time to heal before Jeremy could come back to work with a rage harder than previously. One way or another, his son would pay for this. He just had to find a weak point. He remembered the Doctor calling a name when he was in an agitated sleep, in an excruciating pain. A name he wouldn’t even have pronounced if his mind had been sane. His mind wasn’t sane. Not anymore. The power hidden inside him was too much to handle for anyone and it was driving him insane to the point of spilling non-sense to anyone foreign to his world. Non-sense that seemed important enough to Nash Grieve who had written it all down. At least, at the beginning of the therapy. She had been quick to destroy the rest of the file as the months passed by. A way to protect her patient from the darkness of her boss, from the darkness of a father who had already hurt his son in the past. He could never get his hands on the rest of the file but the scraps of data he got were enough for him to pursue his researches on the Doctor. He couldn’t reach the new face involved. It would be too dangerous to have him around. Rose. This name was the only lead Jeremy had to draw the attention of the Doctor stuck in his son’s mind. If he managed to find her, to bring her to his hospital – he could find any reason to have her locked away – that would send a strong message to this uncatchable alien that kept slipping between his fingers like water. Rose was a common name in the United Kingdom but there was only one Rose who went missing at the same time as Maxence Spitz. No one had thought that these two disappearances could be linked before him. How could humans have with their tiny little brains? Jeremy needed the Doctor’s brain. Not just bits of it like he had taken over the months. He needed to kill the man and dissect him like an animal to find out all of his secret. He would feel no remorse in killing his own son. Maxence had never meant anything to him. All he had been was a nuisance to his life and projects. Rose Tyler was his best shot for this revenge, and he lost no time in trying to get to her. He didn’t elaborate strategies, didn’t plan anything. He had to be clever and clear and go straight to the point if he wanted work as fast as possible. He went to the Powell Estates in person, introduced himself to Jackie Tyler and before he could say anything else, he was kicked out with names and fury. Apparently, the woman mistook him for his son who was his spitting image and thought he should go to hell before even thinking of coming back around her daughter. This attempt was a failure but it confirmed Jeremy’s thoughts that Rose Tyler was the person they had been looking for all along. She had been traveling with the Doctor and he had left her behind when he changed. Perfect. Now, he just had to be patient and build a real plan to make her fall into a deadly trap…

To be continued...

The Fallen © | 2019 | Tous droits réservés.

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English version:

AO3 || TS.

[apaigenamedbook]

“Wicked Appetite (Lizzy and Diesel #1) by Janet Evanovich

Synopsis: 

For centuries, treasure hunters have been eager to possess the stones, undeterred by their corrupting nature. The list is long — Genghis Khan, Alexander the Great, Napoleon, to name a few. Now the Stones have found their way to Salem, Massachusetts, and so has Gerwulf Grimoire, adding himself to this rogues’ gallery of power seekers. He’s an uncommonly dangerous man, with a hunger for the forbidden, and a set of abilities that are way beyond ordinary. Abilities that he feels entitle him to possess anything he might desire. That would include Elizabeth Tucker, the woman he needs to find the Stones. She’s freshly transplanted from New York City to Boston’s North Shore. With a new job as pastry chef at Dazzle’s bakery and an old house inherited from her Aunt Ophelia, her life is pretty much on track …until it’s suddenly derailed by a guy named Diesel, a rude monkey, and a ninja cat. Lizzy can handle the monkey and the cat. She’s not sure about Diesel. He’s offering up his own set of unusual talents, promising to protect her from Grimoire. The kind of protection that Lizzy suspects might involve guarding her body day and night. The Seven Deadly Sins are pride, greed, lust, envy wrath, sloth and gluttony. That pretty much covers everything that is wicked. Diesel thinks it also pretty much covers everything that’s fun. And Lizzy thinks Diesel and the Seven Deadly Sins cover everything her mother warned her about.

Review: 

**2.5 stars**

Oh Boy...where to start with this. Things I did like? Some of the banter and more ridiculous situations that a side character (Shirley) ended up in. And the general premise of this book. What I didn't like? Pretty much anything else. Overall, the pacing and character reaction of discovery of something more paranormal is one of the biggest distractors to this book. It's very abrupt and not very realistic. Secondly-- the men.

hey're basically Thor and Loki-- except there's no real explanation of their backstory or any plot to give them sort of depth. Diesel (Yes, that's his fucking name) is the good guy because he's all tanned and blonde. He's just as commandeering and rude as his cousin, but less showy in a way? But don't worry, he's still overly confident and macho man. Just slightly more puppy doggy than his cousin. There's supposed to be sexual tension I guess, but it really doesn't come off that way, except for maybe the end, because we all know it won't happen for a specific reason named in the book. Also he's supposedly good at flirting but I just think he's a jerk?

Wulf (which is just a nickname from his even crazier name) is the bad guy because he's pale and wears all black and seems dangerous. He's a bit more cold than his cousin Diesel and supposedly wants a lot of power and to abuse it. But don't worry, he's still crazy hot. But you're not supposed to like him because he's less afraid to kill people. But Diesel isn't authorized to kill him? Or maybe he can't. But Wulf won't hurt Diesel because apparantly he also can't? I mean geez, even Loki at least had the guts and motivation to kill Thor. He's vaguely threatening. He supposedly is pretty dark and powerful, but we literally have no real demonstration on it nor do we have any explanation of his motivations, his story. Why is he looking for the stones (beyond the obvious). What lead him down this path? ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? Like...are we supposed to be divided on Team Diesel and Team Wulf? Wulf is definitely more aesthetically pleasing to me, but they're both pretty bland personality wise, and again...I guess he's supposed to be evil? Is it kind of fun that they're cousins and just roll their eyes at each other and compromise? Sure, it's kind of entertaining. Is it actually good character development? No. Boring. Then there's the main character Lizzie (literally had to look up both Diesel and Lizzie's names, even though they're the main characters, because they're both so fucking boring. Wulf may be ridiculous but I can at least remember him).

To borrow from Lizzie: "Geez Louise" So she wasn't hot growing up because she had a bit of a big nose, but she fell and broke it after college, so now she's got a cute nose, so she's now a hot blonde bombshell. Before that there's nothing that would've made her hot. She's supposed to be one of the best pastry chefs, but she's dumber than a box of rocks? I mean, she doesn't seem very intelligent anyway, and apparently her cupcakes are a special paranormal talent? She just decides "well, I guess I can't get rid of these people, so I just won't call the police." Everyone she tells or witnesses these guys just totally react like she does. Like.. I know they're ~magical~, but you wouldn't at least try to notify authorities of being stalked/forced to house a stranger at first? Like IDK. She just kind of takes everything as it comes. And isn't very competent. Like..IDK, if your weird magical cat tries to get you to stay, maybe heed the warning? Even I could tell it was warning her. Oh, and also she finds Diesel annoying, but apparently he's really good at flirting and hard to not desire, even though he's also totally a jerk (blegh). OH! and she thought she lost one of her abilities (never fully explained by the end of the book) and one of the ways she would've lost that is through sexual assault. And while she's a bit angry about it, even has to sit down briefly, doesn't really seem as traumatized as she should if she was potentially sexually assaulted while she was unconscious? Oh, and we know it wasn't Diesel (because he's obviously good) or Wulf because they need her powers to find the objects..so they wouldn't risk that. And we never really find out if the incident with her ability was just a fluke or not... Overall entertaining enough to read, but not a whole lot of action and the characters sucked.

[parabellum-rpg-archive]

Congratulations, Joss! You’ve been accepted to play Jackson Sinclair. Please make your page and send it in within 24 hours.

Admin Note: Your writing was so fun to read, but when I got to the part about Jack and his nieces/nephews I WAS READY TO SOB. (ALSO HIS CATS, IM GOING TO LITERALLY DIE) Thank you for applying and we very much look forward to writing with you! -Admin J

CHARACTER DESIRED

Jackson Sinclair

DESCRIBE THE CHARACTER IN YOUR OWN WORDS

Jackson is a good guy, which is odd, considering his line of business. His moral compass is perhaps slightly skewed, but he definitely has a code. Don’t hurt women or children, don’t enjoy violence, stay away from drugs, humiliation and cruelty aren’t good motivators, peace is better than war. He might have lived a totally normal life and just been that nice guy on your block who’d fix your car for free if you watched his kids once in a while if he’d been dealt different cards. As it is, he’s a large man with a lot of tattoos, an intimidating presence, and a scary voice, and that means most of the time, he doesn’t have to do anything to maintain the peace. And that’s really how he views his job. Sure, he’s the guy you go to when violence must occur, but perhaps because of his reticence, he’s managed to develop a good reputation. He’ll talk shit out first, and if he decides bad things have to happen, well, you must have done something really wrong. If Jack really doesn’t like you, you might as well just leave, because everyone else will assume you must be pretty fucked up. He’ll still fix your car for free, though the return favour might be something a lot more illegal than babysitting. Of course, given the Sinclair family, it could just be babysitting one of his nieces, aka making sure Paityn doesn’t die and Paisley doesn’t lose her shit on someone. He loves his nieces and nephews, they’re the closest thing he has to kids himself, and his home is always available for anyone who needs to crash there, no questions asked. Despite having a fairly safe and law-abiding youth, he’s surprisingly non-judgmental about what they get up to, as long as they’re not hurting anyone. Paityn is his baby and he frets about her constantly, Priya is the only niece he trusts with anything really important, Paisley reminds him of Piper and thus he’s easily won over by her, Sebastian reminds him of himself and he’s quietly encouraging and supportive, and Shiloh is … well, Shiloh, but Jack will follow that boy to Hell just to drag him out if necessary. The subject of Piper Moreau is forever closed as far as he’s concerned. If Morgan brings it up, he’ll pretend he’s over it, but anyone else better shut the fuck up or they’ll find out what the little-seen but much-feared Jackson Sinclair temper looks like.

WRITING SAMPLE

The day was muggy and overcast, which suited Jack’s mood. He needed to take a jog or something, but getting out of bed felt like too much work. The other side of the bed (he still couldn’t sleep in the middle even now) was empty, but he reached over to it anyway. There was no warm spot left, because no one was there, or had been there for quite some time, but he liked to pretend when it was still too early for him to register the ugly truth. Fuck, he was a drama queen. Never could get over the women who left him. His therapist would probably chalk it up to the abandonment of his mother, but Jack distrusted anything that blamed her when she’d only been doing her best. He still went to every session, and tried to talk things out, because walking around with unresolved shit was just a way to take it out on the wrong person, but part of him balked at the whole process. Irish macho bullshit, of course, but hey, hard to shake your roots, right? At least he wasn’t a drunk, or worse, though he never looked down on anyone who was. Well, guys who ditched their families to fuck around and bitch about their problems, yes (thinking of Kieran O'Connell, he made a mental note to have a word with him), but otherwise, he had a lot of sympathy. Life was hard, and not everyone got to grow up loved and cared for like he had. If you didn’t learn coping mechanisms, you just took the first thing that made life easier, and then that became your coping mechanism. Christ, if anyone heard his thoughts, they’d call him a pussy. It was hard being self-aware surrounded by the Irish. Even Freud said they were immune to therapy.

Dragging himself out of bed, he grabbed a pack of cigarettes and lit it by habit, not even fully conscious, or maybe still in that state between being awake and asleep when your mind is awake but your body isn’t. Or vice versa, who the fuck knew anyway. He should ask someone smarter than him about that. Those thoughts immediately led to Piper, but he shoved them extremely deep down, where they couldn’t touch him except in his dreams. The fucked up shit was even in his dreams, she treated him like shit, and he still didn’t want to wake up. More things to talk about with Dr. Brown. Cigarette clenched between his teeth, Jack padded around the apartment, noting idly that Paityn was sleeping on his couch again. He kept telling her to just use the guest room, but he supposed she liked it better in here. Stroking her hair gently, he tucked her in better and carefully adjusted her pillows so her neck wouldn’t hurt. In being so careful, he almost missed Shiloh on the floor, curled around a series of pillows, which made him grin and go looking for another blanket. The Sinclair siblings were a close-knit crew, often travelling in pairs or packs when danger lurked. Even if the only danger came from inside the mind of the baby of the family. Looked like he was skipping his jog and making waffles instead. Oh well. He was past forty, jogging was hardly gonna change that he wasn’t 25 anymore.

The kitchen was pristine, though that was more thanks to his cleaning lady than Jack himself. Still, he moved around in it with more confidence than any of the guys he was in charge of, who all seemed to live off of take out and food that only required a microwave. They hadn’t had Evelyn for a mother, or his grandparents, who’d all taught him that kitchens were fun, and food tasted better when you cooked it yourself and it had real ingredients in it. He tiptoed around the place, starting coffee and getting the ingredients for the waffles together without making anything more than a whisper of sound. He looked like the kind of man who stomped everywhere, but Jack had never cared for loud men. He found being silent had as much of an effect, and he didn’t like to startle people. Well, unless he had to, but that was work. In life, he preferred to walk softly and leave the big stick at home. There was a chorus of mews, and he looked down at Bedknob and Broomstick, the two alley cats that considered his apartment at least one of their bases of operations. He dragged them to the vet and bought them soft cat beds and even braved washing them when they got into something foul, but they were almost contrarily wild, in spite of all his efforts. He adored them anyway, and poured out the fanciest cat food they were willing to eat into two dishes while assuring them quietly that they were both garbage monsters. His fondness for stray animals was one of those things that Morgan was allowed to joke about, because he was Morgan and they were brothers before anything else, and no one else was allowed to mention. One of his guys had taken a pot shot at a stray dog once. Everyone still talked about that day, though not in Jack’s hearing.

The waffles were sizzling in the iron and the coffee was percolating in the elegant machine that Penny had bought him for his last birthday when he heard stirring from the other room. Paityn hovered in the doorway, always unsure in any space regardless of how many times Jack made her welcome. Scooping up Bedknob, the more cuddly of the two, Jack came over and kissed the top of her head, handing off the cat and nudging her back towards the couch. “Breakfast’ll be up in a bit, Scout. Go'n wake up that degenerate brother of yours. Tell'em he ain’t a dog, he can sleep on the furniture if he wants to.” He’d introduced his nieces, and Shiloh, to Sailor Moon, and had willingly watched the seemingly endless episodes with them when they were children, and they’d been the Sailor Scouts to him ever since, though Paityn was the only one who still allowed the nickname. He’d been the one to take them to their first R movie, and taken them all out for rides on his motorcycle, their little arms clutching his sides so tight it hurt, though he’d have rather eaten his tongue than told them to stop. He’d been the one they called or texted when they were too shitfaced to remember how to get home, or were at a party that had gotten a little too weird, or had made the kind of youthful mistakes that seemed world-ending and could never be confessed to their parents. Grabbing up a plate of waffles, he headed into the living room, telling Shiloh to get his ass off the floor, was he raised in a barn, all while handing the boy a mug of coffee just the way his nephew took it. From the outside, his life might appear lonely, but Jack had family, and that was all that mattered. And who knew, maybe he’d finally talk Shiloh into coming for a jog with him. Stranger things had happened.

[verobatto]

TFW: Time to rewrite your stars.

(The Phoenix Complex in Supernatural characters development. S14 spoilers)

Hello fandom! I just wanted to write something about the exciting idea represented in this season: Growth Time.

I already wrote about this Phoenix Complex before in my "breaking jars" meta, and how Supernatural used it as character development. This season 14 is showing us how our beloved characters slowly but certainly... Are arriving to fullfill their inner circle.

Sam from the "child with demon blood" to "there won't be new king of hell"

Since the beginning, Sam was marked with this "destiny" to fulfill, written by the unfortunately events that made Mary took the wrong decision.

You could say he was "screwed", surrended by demons in disguise, controlling all his movements. It was written... This kid with demon blood should rise with Lucifer, bring the Apocalypse and rule the world.

But even so, he's Sam "fucking" Winchester, he fought against all written destiny, against all bad decisions and he sacrificed himself for the good and his own ideas and perceptions about what is good. That was a triumph, but not the only triumph he had.

We could say his destiny was OPEN HELL GATE AND MAKE HELL OF THIS WORLD. But instead of that... He tried to closed hell's gate like a brave warrior looking for redemption in season 8.

I really believe this is Sammy season too. Episode 1 showed us a huge character growth, a bright Phoenix resurfacing from the ashes, screaming to every word written about him and his destiny, that here's is where this must ended.

Gif credit @itsokaysammy

And how glorious way to closed that hateful destiny. He rules his own path. He says "ENOUGH!" To those demons, but also, to his past with them. We won't come back to those black days. He even saw his prison guard, Lucifer, died in front of him. The victory is by his side.

This path of self knowledge and self acceptance is about to end. He's not anymore this guy with so many regrets and so many incomplete desires. He even had the opportunity of reconciliation with his mother, that profund wound, healing with forgiveness.

Jack from son of Lucifer to son of Kelly Kline

What a most impossible changing destiny Jack had. The living son of Lucifer itself. What a dark path was extended in front of him. The darkest panorama.

But nevertheless... He wasn't only Lucifer's son, he was also Kelly Kline's son.

Kelly Kline erased that dark path, and brought a new one, full with kindness and love, to his son.

He's part of this family now, he was filled with goodness and firm ideas about what is worth to fight for. And he's is the youngest warrior, but not the less brave.

He even visited his grandparents and meet them. Was the reaffirmation of his human roots, his good roots, and that was huge for his self knowledge.

There's too much things for him to learn... Loosing his grace as a Nephilim was a new reborn, he's learning now how to growth again in self acceptance. But with all those dad's surrounding him, it wouldn't be so hard for him.

Castiel from Angel of the Lord to Winchester's Angel

This is an amazing transformation. And I wrote a lot of him and Dean in my other meta talking about the Breaking Jars and Slow Construction of Destiel Canon.

Here is the link

So... Everybody remembers our Badass Angel from the earliest seasons...

Both gorgeous gif credits @magnificent-winged-beast

Yes, this Angel of the Lord with a mission, with faith in the Sacred Oath and in God, with a thousands of brothers, one of the best soldiers in Heaven, changed everything for humanity. For the Winchester Family. He rewrite his Oath, traslating his faith for God, to Dean and Sam. But mostly, to Dean.

All of his bad decisions, taken with good intentions, brought him to depressed states, and always self recriminations.

As I said before, being human was cataclysm for him, and after that, being useful for the battle, slowly twisted to being just there, for his family.

In season 13 we witnessed the huge improvement of the character, if this season wasn't applicable the Phoenix Complex to Castiel, I don't know then where tu put it. Castiel started being dead, facing himself in the Darkness, and by the end of the season, he literally killed his old him, AUCastiel, the Cas that never met the Winchesters, who never fell for love.

Because he had lost everything for them, for Dean, but he also won everything with them.

And in season 14 we're in front of this Castiel. He knows where he belongs, he knows he's part of the Winchesters. And he accepts that without regrets.

IDK you guys, but I see him more human, and emotional. IDK if this bc he misses his human, or bc he IS becoming human by feeling himself as a human...

Dean, from Righteous Man to a man who must love himself

And here we're, at this point with "What do you want, Dean?" Season.

This is the most complex character of the series. Our beloved constipated hunter, needs a lot of breaking to reach the new Dean.

He has this distorted imagen of himself in which he's the Patriarchal protector, some kind of kamikaze who is willing to die and sacrifice himself as many times as necessary for his family and for save the world. He thinks he's expandable, he almost hates himself, for trying again and again to be someone he is not. To fullfil all expectations his father put on his shoulders. He must be the strong, macho, righteous man in charge of his family.

That's why I feel Michael's Possession and the new mark in the non Destiel mark shoulder, will be two strong expositions of what Dean really wants. He must learn, after so many "deaths", to accept who he's, accept what he really want inside and accept himself, then and once for all, he'll be able to love and be able to recognize that his family loves him in return. Bc he is important for them. He matters.

This is Dean's exposure season, in all the aspects. He must to look himself in the mirror, and be honest. Breaking free from his emotional prison. Is time for him to feel loved, to started to love himself, to truly love their family in a healthy way, and to love his angel without shame. I know, it looks like a long journey... But he's getting there.

Closing circles at the end of the journey

To conclude, I want to share this beautiful quote.

"And what if a piece of wood discovers that it's a violin?"

A. Rhimbaud

This is the end of every journey, to discover who are they for real. And accept and love themselves will make them free.

We are there with Sam, Jack, and Cas... We are waiting now for Dean to reach it.

As you have seen... We are almost there, I presume, after writing this meta with a little of melancholy, I could say we are arriving at the end. Of course I can be wrong, and the writers could make the cliffhanger an put reverse in every arc or just put pause, bc hey, I don't write the show, and this just are my thoughts about TFW in this story till now.

Ok! I have to make a big mention here bc @magnificent-winged-beast made those beautiful gif set from Season 4 "The rapture", and she had this accident with an electric storm and lost the work she was doing with the gifs I asked her for this meta especially, and she did it again, and she even didn't sleep the hours she should bc of this gifs and I'm so grateful with her... 😭 Your gifs are the best! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!! 💖 You are awesome!!

You can share your opinions and debate, i'd love to read you!

I'm tagging some friends to discuss...

@emblue-sparks @magnificent-winged-beast @silvie111 @mrsaquaman187 @castiellover20 @lykanyouko @agusvedder @lovemesomecas94 @navajolovesdestiel

And everyone who wants to share!

Ja neeeeee!

Buenos Aires, October 23rd 2018 01:25 PM

[imagination-of-a-melted-bitch]

Tay’s Smut Game 5 ♡

♡ Send me a member (Threesomes, foursomes, gangbangs(orgies) welcomed!)

♡ ALL SMUT IS ‘X READER’ ~ Fanboys welcomed! 

♡ Choose a starter :)

♡ These are mine,, they’re actually not too bad...

♡ Open for BTS, GOT7, MONSTA X, EXO, NCT 127, BIGBANG, VIXX

♡ You can request more than one prompt at a time!

♡ You can request prompts with idols from different groups!

CEO!AU:

1.“Come on, admit it, you sit at your little desk all day and she walks in and out and all you want to do is fuck that tight little ass of hers, don’t you?”

2.“Can you please fuck me, sir?”

3.“I wore my naughty little skirt just for you Mr.(idol of choice) and I think you’d like to know…I’m not wearing any panties.”

4."Mr.(Idol of choice), I see how you look at me, I know you want to fuck me...but, how would your wife respond?"

5."Seriously? You spilled coffee on my slacks? Clean it up."

6."Some would call it exploiting my powers but I need to see which one of you is really ready to do anything for the company."

7."You're sleeping with the CEO of the company? No wonder you got that promotion your second month here!"

8."Are you sure you want to do this here? I mean you have no curtains and the whole office would be able to see us..."

9."You've been such a naughty secretary, trying to seduce your boss...well, it's working,"

10."You've been hired to help the boss relieve some stress...he'll see you in his office now."

Male!Dom:

11."Swallow daddy's dick, make him cum and maybe, maybe he'll reward you."

12.“One cock is never enough for this slut, even with your cock in his pussy…she’s begging for one in her ass.”

13.“Move your hand! I’m not stopping-this is what you asked for, now be a good little slut and take it.”

14.“Keep testing my patience and you won’t be able to sit for the next month and every time you go to slide on some shorts or jeans you’ll grimace remembering how hard I had to spank your ass, all because you couldn’t listen.”

15.“Imagine being fucked so good, your eyes roll to the back of your head and you drool a little.”

16.“If you’re not screaming my name at the top of your lungs then I’m doing something wrong.”

17.“Some good dick can turn any good girl into a naughty girl.”

18.“Daddy needs you, princess. Daddy needs your mouth so bad.”

19.“You’re so relentless. All I asked was for you to wait until we got home and you couldn’t even do that! You are so in for it tonight.”

20.“Say it! Say it loud! Let everyone know who’s fucking this pussy right.”

21.“I don’t think you understand how much I want to bend you over the nearest surface and fuck some sense into you.”

22.“Your tits bounce with each thrust…fuck you’re so sexy!”

23.“You’ve never had your pussy eaten? No, I refuse to believe no one has eaten this sweet cunt.”

24.“I love watching you throw it back on me,  always so eager for my cock.”

25.“You’ve been such a good girl, maybe daddy will finally fuck that whore ass of yours.”

26.“You try to act all innocent but I know what you really are. A cock craving whore, that’s what.”

27.“Your panties are soaked little girl, I guess you like the idea of me taking what I want.”

28.“You gonna cry and moan while I run into that virgin cunt?”

29.“Face down. Ass up. Spread that pretty little pussy for me.”

30.“You know the dick’s good when you can nothing but lay there and take it.”

31.“Are you a swallower? Yes? Good because I want you to swallow every drop of cum I’m going to give you.”

32. “I know, deep down, you’re a filthy little slut who likes to take cock deep down her throat.”

33. “Be loud. Scream for daddy, let the others know you’re mine and only mine.”

34. “You’re acting out…so, give me one good reason why I shouldn’t fold you in half right here and fuck the shit out of you.”

35. “I’m tired of you being so gentle and soft. I want you to treat me like a princess and fuck me like a whore!”

36. “I’m tired of acting like I don’t want you, and you don’t want me…just pin me against a wall and fuck me already.”

37.“Does me touching you excite you this much? You’re literally dripping.”

38.“I have a confession…I like to be choked, and not just your hand wrapped around my throat…like, choke me until my vision blurs.”

Overstimulation:

39.“You look so pretty tied up, your clit forced against that vibrator…cum for me, princess, cum for me.”

40."I-I can't. My thighs are shaking so hard and even the slightest breeze across my slit is making me shake daddy, I can't take anymore."

41."Three orgasms and you're still as hard as a rock and your balls are blue as hell. What do you want me to do, baby, how can I help?"

42."Fuck me, daddy! Fuck my used and abused cunt."

43."Two orgasms isn't enough for you? You need three? Of course, you do! You're a little cock craving slut,"

44."I have a confession, god if I weren't so fucking drunk I don't think I'd even consider telling you this but...sometimes all I want to do is tie you up and make you cum again and again until all you can do is lay there, trembling, begging me to stop."

Public/Semi-Public:

45.“We can’t! The others are here!”

46.“So what! This is my apartment and I’ll fuck you whenever and wherever I want.”

47.“Tell me how it feels being at a public event ass filled with your favorite vibrating butt plug.”

48. “Ah fuck! No! No, we shouldn’t be doing this. Well, not here at least…”

49.“Really? Couldn't you wait until we got home? You needed me so bad, that you’re going to fuck me in a public bathroom?”

Cum Play/Breeding:

50.“I’m going to fill your pussy with every inch of my cock, and then I’m going to cum deep inside your pussy. I’m going to breed you…you want that, you little slut?”

51." This is a perfect position, legs spread wide, cock buried deep in your pussy, you're going to get every drop of cum I have to offer."

52."Can you feel it, how heavy my balls are? I haven't cum in three weeks because you're so fucking stubborn, Y/N, please touch me."

53."A bet's a bet, and I won, so you know what that means. I get to fill you with my cum, anywhere hole of my choosing."

54."I love how you sit there, tongue out, waiting for my load.  Such a pretty, obedient whore."

55."You're going to go back out there and sit at your desk in your cubicle, dripping with my cum like the good girl you are."

56."Your pussy looks so pretty, especially when it's covered in my cum."

57."You feel how thick my cock is? Fucking your tight walls? I'm knotting you, baby, knotting this pretty pussy of yours and then I'm going to fill you to the hilt with my cum."

Hook-Ups:

58.“I just want to know how your dick would feel inside of me.”

59.“Desire is a nasty little thing.”

60.“I-is that a hickey?”

61.“Were you two just fucking? You two were totally just fucking!”

62.“I heard the best way to get over someone was to get under someone.”

63."Yes, I know it's two in the morning, but I'm stressing over finals and tuition and when I'm with you, all those things go away..."

64."I can't believe we had sex, you're my TA!"

Fem!Dom:

65.“It’s kind of embarrassing to admit but my cock gets so hard when I think of you noona, you make me such a leaky mess.”

66.“As much as I would love for you to fuck me…I need to know if you’re going to last.”

67.“Good boy, you had so much cum for me. I can feel it dripping down my thighs!”

68.“Good boys share.”

69.“You don’t have to act all macho, no one’s expecting it from you…be the sub I know you are.”

70.“Now, be a good boy and clean my cunt of his cum.”

71.“Admit it. Even when you’re not fucking me, all you can think about is fucking me.”

72.“What do I want you to do? I want you to eat my cunt until I’m shaking.”

73.“Don’t be embarrassed…I think it’s hot you get so hard when something’s filling your ass.”

74.“The sight of you, on your knees, tongue fucking my pussy is too much! Seeing you submit in such a way is so fucking hot.”

Voyeurism/2+:

75.“You like my friends, slut? I know they like you.”

76.“Go ahead, tell em, baby, tell them how you loved to be covered/filled with cum.”

77.“Interestingly enough, (idol of choice), just told me he gets off to the thought of you…I thought maybe we could help him out. Give him the real thing.”

78.“I’m honestly so jealous of (idol of choice), he gets to come home and fuck you after tour…”

79.“Go ahead, taste how sweet her pretty pussy is.”

80.“I see the way you look at (idol of choice) and I know you want him…go! Go and ask him to fuck your little whore pussy.”

81.“Come on princess, put on a show for me and (idol of choice), we miss you and your tight cunt so much.”

82. “Me and my friends have had a hellish week, help us relieve some of our stress, princess.”

83. “It’s my turn…I’m going to fuck his cum deep into your tight, little pussy.”

84.“I’m not going to lie…I’ve gotten off a few times thinking of having my every hole filled with cock.”

85.“Fuck! Is it bad I’m so hard watching someone else fuck your dirty cunt?”

86.“You look so much prettier with my member/friend’s cum on your face.”

87.“You’re going to let me fuck your pink pussy, while your boyfriend’s watching? God, you are such a naughty girl.”

Anal Play:

88.“I’m going to tear this little ass in two, and you’re going to do nothing but lay there and take it.”

89.“I want you to fuck my ass daddy/mommy, I’m your little anal slut.”

90.“I am so wet at the thought of your thick cock filling my ass.”

91."I am a straight man who loves to have his ass fucked."

92."The plug isn't even, I need another cock, please, please fill my ass with another cock."

93."I don't know, most guys deny and deny this some more but to be honest with you...there's nothing I love more than tongue-fucking an asshole."

Fem/Male!Dom:

94.“All these girls/guys, they try to get you to come home with them. Little do they it’s my name you’re chanting so loud that by the end of the night you can’t even speak.”

95.“I just want you to know…even though you’ve been a good girl/boy tonight, I’m going to tie you up and punish you just for my amusement.”

96.“I see the way you look at me…and it’s very inappropriate, Mr. (Idol’s last name).”

97.“I like this, your hands above your head, your body completely at my/our mercy.”

98.“It’s that look, that look of innocence on your face, it makes me want to tear you into two.”

Orgasm Denial:

99.“Trust me denial is your friend. When you finally get to cum, it’ll feel so good…I promise.”

100."No, you don't get to cum until I say so. I don't care if you're close if you cum I'm going to punish you."

101."I know it feels good princess, but if you cum daddy is going to spank, not your ass but your pussy, until it's red and you're clenching around nothing, thighs shaking and skin burning, begging me to stop."

102."Are you close baby boy? Yeah? Well, we can't have that, not yet anyway, you haven't earned it."

103."I don't like edging!  I want to cum and I want to cum now."

104."I don't think I like your tone...you better be careful I might not even let you cum tonight."

105."Let us use your holes, fuck you senseless and maybe, only then will one of us make you cum. Deal?"

[abloodymess]

As I mentioned I watched Martin Scorsese’s “Alice Doesn’t Live Here Anymore” from 1974 and re-fell in love with it. When I was watching the film I was doing so half heartedly through a Feminist lens and also just for pure pleasure. If you haven’t seen the film its about lower middle class Alice (Ellen Burstyn), an early 30′s mom whose shitty husband is suddenly killed in a car accident. We feel great relief that this asshole is gone, but Alice soon realizes with this new freedom comes terror. The terror from being a woman whose husband refused to let her work and now finds herself having to provide for her and her son without many skills. Alice remembers she was happy once in Monterey, CA when before she was married she wanted to be a singer; so she sells the house and her and her son Tommy get in station wagon and try for a new start. It is hard to find a working gig as a singer, so soon Alice is “stuck” waitressing in little diners.

I don’t want to spoil this old film for you, but it boils down to Alice (and women) are always expected to put their dreams or wants on hold to support some man’s dream or a family she wasn’t even sure she wanted. While doing things her way Alice finally runs into a mostly good rancher named David played by Kris Kristofferson who genuinely loves Alice and Tommy, Alice is cautious (because you know, men), but she soon falls for him too. At the end of the picture they have a falling out because as you might have guessed it, David wants the family and draws a line in the sand, “Is it me or is it singing in Monterrey?” Alice knows she could be happy here and she loves David, but she walks because no one is going to put her wants or Tommy in the backseat ever again. 

David shows back up at the diner and Alice goes to take his order and they stare in silence. All David can say is, “Please.” Alice turns to go back into the kitchen and David storms out, but stops just before the door and yells in front of the diner “God damn it Alice I said please!” This infuriates Alice who snaps back, “My life --- and I’m supposed to give it away on a please?! Just because you say please I am supposed to turn into Dale Evans!?” David, stammers back, “What’s the matter with you I never said that.” “You didn’t have to say it.”

Now, this is interesting because this reinforces that even good men expect women to change because they did the bare minimum, he said, “please” and he expects that to be enough for Alice to change what she wants from life. But Scorsese is smart here because during this David also starts to realize this.

“What do you want Alice?”

“I want to sing. I’m a singer! Whatever I do that’s going to be part of it.”

“Are you any good?”

“I. Don’t. Know.” 

“If you don’t know, is it worth all of this?”

“...yes. Yes. YES!”

“Is Monterey part of it too?”

“You don’t understand.”

“Explain it to me.”

“I was happy when I lived in Monterey--”

“You’re not a little girl anymore, you can be happy here!”

Alice almost crying, “You don’t understand. I was stopped once before, and I am not going to be stopped again.”

“Who’s stopping you? Sing for God’s sake, sing! I TOLD YOU BEFORE WHATEVER YOU DO, I’LL BACK YOU UP!”

“You have to understand what I just said.”

“I do. <beat> I don’t give a good god damn about that ranch, I’ll sell it let’s go. Alright?”

And it is at that moment that a man was willing to give up their life and dreams for Alice, that a woman could be put first, even if her dream isn’t “good” or even if Alice won’t make it, her desires and hopes have value and are of worth because she is a person whose dreams are equal to any ranch or family fantasy. The film ends with Alice and Tommy (David is nowhere to be seen because this has never been about David) saying maybe they will hang around here a little longer to see what happens. In the background is a hotel with the name “Monterey”, suggesting maybe Alice has found her home on her terms.

So this all felt Feminist as fuck to me. So I dug up some books and wanted to see what Scorsese had to say about the subject and what I found was pretty interesting. When asked if the film was Feminist, Scorsese said, he didn’t think so because he was a dude and he had never been through what Alice had to go through, he fears that Alice will still end up washing David’s dishes. “I can only show Alice’s truth as honestly as I can, it doesn’t feel right for me to declare Alice a feminist picture, I would guess that is up to the ladies who watch the film to decide, but I can say I understand Alice. No, Alice wasn’t intended to be my feminist film, my feminist film was Taxi Driver.” 

Scorsese talks about how the best way he can make a feminist statement as a man is to tackle masculinity and show what the endgame of macho bullshit will be. In Travis Bickle Scorsese finds a violent man and shows the violence clogging up his insides and his inability to communicate with a society. “All this violence comes out because he was rejected by a girl. I mean we have all been rejected-- but there is now a certain kind of man that all of a sudden is all around us that feels he is owed something if things don’t work out.” 

Maybe Travis was able to ease the violent pressure valve inside him while at war (he is a Vet) or maybe it made it worse and now there is no place to put it. He is drawn over and over to vulgarity and ugliness, he continues to drive his Taxi down areas that only fuel his rage. Travis sees himself as a nice man, who sends his parents cards, but he also takes his date to a porn film and when she isn’t interested there is something wrong with her not him. It is the politicians that are wrong not him. He views himself as moral as pure as an white avenger who is going to free Iris, a 13 year old prostitute in a hail of bullets. When Travis reaches Iris, a woman he claims to care about or love; much like Ethan Edwards in John Ford’s “The Searchers” we do not know if Travis is going to “rescue” her or kill her. Surrounded by blood and bodies Travis attempts to kill himself, but there are no more bullets, his violence has been released, at least for a little while, and it’s ok anways because he is such a nice guy who one day is going to get organized. 

When I think about Taxi Driver I can see Scorsese even then warning us about 4*Chaners, Gamegaters, MRAs, with Travis, maybe we should have worried when people were viewing Travis as heroic, maybe we should have took notice when Travis literally looked into the mirror that Scorsese was holding up at toxic masculinity and when he asked “Are you talking to me?” We should have replied, “Yes, we are and we are fucking terrified.” 

[spilledreality]

The Extremes Are Always Clear, The Middle Always Murky

Just finished The Bakkhai, Anne Carson's translation of a late Euripides play (400ish BCE). Sometimes it made my gut churn. Quick TL;DR: Dionysus comes to Thebes, inciting local women to run for the hills and abandon their infants for drunken orgies. Local ruler-adolescent Pentheus is skeptical of Dio’s divinity and worries broken-window style that Thebes' structural integrity is threatened by the cultlike transgressions; hoping to tamp down preemptively, he orders Dionysus and his gang of followers imprisoned. Dionysus, predictably enraged, foments ("ferments") the women to destroy local villages and burn down Pentheus's home. (Christ it’s a universal pattern; maybe the moron Crichton from Farscape was actually on to something with his diplomacy LARPing.) Pentheus is fully Apollonian to the point of authoritarianism, trying to maintain order and force the world to submit to his personal conception of "common sense" and rationality. A total episteme guy, no sense of humor. But his overbearing oppressiveness is an exact mirror of the Dionysian overbearingness: chaos that does not rest until it swallows the world whole, until all structure is dust, the cultural-meme equivalent of a tornado or black hole. What seems at first like Dionysian fun n' games, drunken revelry and casual sex, is revealed to be vengeful, controlling — the Bakkhai, the local horde of women who've run off to the hills to suckle wolves and scissor, are absolutely obsessed with policing the unpure, beseeching Dionysus to punish anyone who's not adequately Bacchic. And no one in this play is capable of moderation. They're either throwing people in jail for having sex or they're tearing off farmers' heads with bloodlust. Everyone except Teirisias and Kamos, resident elders whose wisdom (looking like basic human reasonableness) includes a refusal to draw fanatical hard-lines. At one point Kadmos is all (paraphrasing) "Dionysus might be real, might not be, does it matter? The revelry does no harm, and it would bring honor on our family if it’s believed our family’s related to a god." (Dionysus is Pentheus's cousin; grandfather Kadmos gave birth to two daughters who gave birth to Pentheus and Dionysus.) (Therefore, I assert, Euripides was the First Pragmatist. William James had nothing on Kadmos.) Meanwhile the Bacchic horde is just begging Dionysus to "crush the hubris of wayward men" who aren’t adequately Bacchic. But the thing about the Bakkhai  is that, when men aren't around — my understanding of the Greek symbolic logic: men are structure, women are chaos, only chaos can give birth to new structure — when men aren't around, the Bakkhai women sleep "calm as buttons," completely at rest. And then some local cowherder is unlucky enough to stumble upon their camp, or they smell a man from afar or whatever, and pretty soon the Bakkhai have ransacked two local villages and ripped the farmer's entire herd to pieces with their bare hands. Pentheus, an arrogant macho guy whose solution to literally every problem is grabbing his sword, pisses them off more than anything; they rip a pine tree out of the ground to get to him. Which looks a lot like a structural, symbolic logic at play — absolutism breeds absolutism, maybe, or mutual disarmament beats preemptive suspicion in the longue durée. (Again: Crichton.) Or maybe it's just that chaos, the Bacchic, are merely negations — of structure, of order — and without structure to convert to raw fuel, the Bacchic/Bakkhai would burn out quickly on it own, the way a party dies down when the drugs run out and the high starts wearing off.

The Bacchic is freedom in its most literal sense, which again is just negation, liberty from any rule or any restraint whatsoever — teenage ontology, maybe — including freedom from the (disapproving, social) sober mind, hence, ekstasis. What Euripides seems to be pointing at, or understand, is that this kind of teenage edgelord anarchism only exists because society's there, or school, or parents or whatever, and because these structures are probably dramatically failing too. There's always been the desire to shed responsibility, but good structure at least minimizes or controls this rebellious urge, and Pentheus's authoritarianism is definitely not good structure. You need a (The) Man to rail against or you'll have to actually start thinking about your beliefs positively, instead of as negations of whatever values regime you're under. Fanatical belief is a social condition. There aren't any fanatics on a desert island, only pragmatists; the ideology enters when other people do. (Thus the shepherd and his dismembered herd.) I’m not sure there is an answer to the eternal Apollonian/Dionysian problem, but I think the pragmatism Euripides gets at is involved, looking something like the basic acknowledgement of reality rather than its denial: Pentheus's protestant suppression/literal prohibition only rouses ("arouses," ha) the Bakkhai. Teirisius and Kadmos the elders are the only ones smart enough to know when you see a wild animal, you look it straight in the eye and back away slowly. The really wild parts of the play were the cross-dressing sections, which I’m still not sure what to make of. Pentheus, perhaps psychically influenced by Dionysus, thinks a little bacchanalia — dipping his toe, using irony for internal justification — dresses up as a woman to spy on the Bakkhai women in the hills, perhaps even catch them in cunnilingus. And this fissure, this personal allowance to let a bit of Dionysus, does in fact destroy him — he's literally torn apart by it, what classicists love calling sparagamos, in a literal destructuring of the symbolic order. One of the women who does the tearing is his own mother, arm from socket, drunk off Dionysus. (Only from chaos can new structure emerge, as only from woman can man.) Anyway, this play has had a lot of scholarship and I'm sure I inevitably retread retread swathes of existing interpretations, but at the very least I think this is a reading Carson's translation deserves, despite its slickly trendy surface suggestion that Pentheus the conservative is secretly a crossdresser, the way the old joke about homophobic Republicans being in the closet goes. (I don’t know about you but I always found those suggestions offensive to both conservatives and the gays.) The play ends with Agave, Pentheus's mother, marching down the streets of Thebes with her son's head impaled on a stake, praising "Bakkhos! Partner in the hunt!" A servant remarks, "The trophy in her hands is her own tears." They know not what they do.