#hopefully this isnt that much of garbage

[obsessingonthevalley]

Post series 14 debrief

You might be thinking, “hey freak on tumblr, this isn’t stardew valley related,” or “hey freak on tumblr don’t you mean season 1…” shut up?

So yeah i can’t super think how to relate this to stardew valley, but that isnt the point. I’m feeling down and have been thinking about series 14 an ungodly amount to cope. Sooo… here we go.

I’m starting with my personal ranking of the series including “The Church on Ruby Road.”

9. Space Babies, fun but just not for me

8. Empire of Death, classic russell finale that just doesnt hit (cough cough series 2 finale) also fym “it only has power because we thought so”

7. Church on Ruby Road, pretty close between the next 3. They all just aren’t anything to write home about. I’m not looking forward to rewatch them.

6. Legend of Ruby Sunday, I liked this barely more than church on ruby road because of how much more there is to both Ruby and the Doctor as characters

5. Devils chord, mid episode. I liked it a lot when i first watched it but after some time. its okay.

4. Dot and Bubble, enjoyable, but not the most amazing, again mid but looking forward to rewatching it.

3. Boom, hard to put it here because it is phenomenal but the other 2 just take the cake.

2. 73 Yards, controversially apparently, i’ve heard its not the most loved episode. I get that the open ending and confusing paranormal esque plot isnt everyones vibe but i kinda liked it. also “fairy circle” “ask him about that” still makes me laugh to this day.

1. Rogue. AHHHHHHHH. jonathon groff the love of my life (yes i am lin manuel miranda. 🥰) Did make me miss river tho, like heavily. its just a spectacular episode and hopefully is one that can be looked back on as fondly as “silence in the library” and “forest of the dead”

I liked the series overall, it’s not my favourite for sure, but I think it’s better than series 2,11,12,13, arguably 7 too.

I think that Ncuti’s doctor has such strong Capaldi energy, and I dont have much of a reason other than in Boom there was a small part when he asked Ruby to throw the dead corpse tube in the air to figure out the weight was sooo heaven sent coded. He also just carries around a certain swagger.

I hate the sonic. not dislike. or feel weird about. I despise it, it is my mortal enemy. No further comment.

Yeah so about the ending, and Ruby’s mother, how she held so much power because we gave her power, is such a flaming pile of garbage. It is a sweet message or whatever but no.

[floor-a]

Just finished watching the Five Nights At Freddy’s Movie. I can say that i was pleasantly surprised, and i enjoyed myself for the most part. Anyone who doesn’t want to be spoiled should stop reading here and just know that the movie is not the pile of garbage some people are saying it to be. I’m sure there’s lots people don’t like, but overall i don’t mind a lot of that stuff.

Spoilers beyond this point! Do not read if you do not want to know stuff about the movie! (I do not know how to mark something as a spoiler)

Okay, firstly, the MatPat cameo was a very welcome surprise. I didn’t expect to see him in it, and his lines were a funny reference.

The aunt was awful, i hope she is dead, that will only raise my rating of the movie.

I’d love to have seen an entire night from the perspective of that other security guard, really get more of a look at how terrifying the animatronics are.

The Living Tombstone being the end credits song was a brilliant choice, out of all the options to chose from that song was definitely the right call. It is still a bop almost a decade later, and i will stand by that opinion.

Matthew Lillard was fantastic, i only wish we saw more of him. (Maybe have shown Mike around the pizzeria, or had it be him in the training tapes, just a bit bigger of a presence in the movie. Still no complaints about it though). This isnt surprising though considering how great of an actor he is and how well he pulls of murderous individuals. Can’t wait to see him in any future fnaf movies (hopefully).

I want one of those security guard badges, who do i have to bribe/kill for one?

All of the animatronics looked brilliant, and the yellow bonnie suit looked especially fantastic. My only gripe is that we did t get to see the empty, white eyes of the animatronics, but that’s a minor thing, and makes sense given how they were technically being controlled.

The murderous animatronics were great, i only wish we got a better view of what was done to the guys who broke in, because seeing a cupcake mauling a guy to death was hilarious and i could only wish to see more. Also, loved that bonnie was in the supply closet, fun detail. Most of all, the scene where the babysitter got bitten in half was awesome and unexpected, loved it.

The springlock scene was good, would have maybe preferred a few more and faster snaps of the suit to really show the violence of the machine, and a bit more blood like how it happened in the games, but eh, it was definitely good either way. Naughty rabbits get put in the pain cupboard.

The robotic voice at the end was a great touch.

Balloon boy is creepy as fuck and definitely warrants the reaction he gets, even if he’s smaller. I would punt that asshole so far.

The fort scene felt a little out of place but it wasn’t as bad as I’ve heard some people say it was. They’re kids, and they’ve just met their friend for the first time, they’re gonna want to do kids stuff. Was it a odd? Sure, but it’s fine.

I feel like all the roles were well cast, and enjoyed their performances. Could have definitely been a lot worse.

Overall I’d give this a solid 7-8/10. While there were aspects I’d have liked to be different it was in no way a disappointment as some have said. As much as i can understand that, i don’t agree with it. Maybe it’s just that my expectations were a bit low to begin with, but i was pleasantly surprised.

[dkdjnridet7744]

I think it's absolutely batshit insane, crazier than any person I have ever seen in my entire life including people on drugs that the whole entire effort to flap around and go ahead no it was no no to hide from literal regular people. I mean my family doesn't know me, but like they know who I am and my parents are and that I don't live in the same state as them. There are a few in positions they worked in even though they died. My great uncle literally died in 2009 and that is fucking brilliant. Oh yes the ghost with the people there and they're aware of all the weird stuff.

Why on earth would somebody that important have any ability or the inkling to go "that was literally just some garbage pit" and then just put up ancient civilizations pictures as they're probably going "look it's still us under this" or whatever I mean wow. Oh my goodness. This is the loudest thing I've ever heard. Wouldn't it be crazy if right around the same area the people you were blaming went wow I understand that. Hopefully they know that that happened I mean If I was in that position myself with all of that wrongdoing attached to me I think I would because look they're still nice people and they're regular.

I have no clue what this is really I may go ahead and end my life later too I don't know. I am perfectly capable of doing that myself though so. THERE IS THE ICING ON THE CAKE. I HAVE NO APPETITE BECAUSE I AM SICKENED BY THE PEOPLE DOING THAT SHIT. BUT OH MY FUCKING GOD. I WAS LITERALLY GETTING PICKED ON FOR HAVING THE THOUGHT "CAN WE GET THAT GUY TO SUICIDE"AND HERE IT IS. LET ME HIDE THAT I KNOW THE NAME HERE IS THE ATTEMPT IT IS ABSENT. OH NO.

I'm never having kids again and I will make fun of people who do too I don't care that's where I am. I don't care. Maybe he'll whisper more secrets in his sleep at this rate. I mean I wonder what the difference will be between honesty and staying quiet. Oh boy they're like what the fuck.

I don't care like my life sucks, mine are safe because of my life and hey, who helped get the information and looked and looked and whatever else that they decide to do or don't do not know my family or anyone else around and can't pass it there either, and they still have their lives and their freedom. Fuck it, they're probably not going to give a shit however they turn their face and eventually the whole head. Safety, for the peepers. Nobody goes anywhere against their will so fuck it, hangout and live to spite that piece of shit.

If that country had the energy we brought to the Middle East after they had their culture and government in good standing to begin with to rip em around and say hey this is not good, do this....with some changes....they might not sit on the whole season of winter anymore. They just might fall down. The fact that I had to wear this like this was like really bad and I can't do it another way but fuck that entire thing they set up and put it on where the underworld has to learn to spot it and honestly have it handled before the thoughts are living people. Right? That was definitely possible like way back before anytime this kinda thing has happened, but that's why I think so many people are just so uncomfortable and just had the knowledge that they had to do something.

I hope we ask Japan some questions about meth! Right? Just some questions. I'm sure it won't take very many. Thank god for people who know they aren't crazy. I'll tell a cop to his face "you know that those people literally see so much evil and can just spot it? Anytime? Yeah? That's your car? Ew were calling someone." I JUST WANT TO FORGET THIS OH KY GOD I WANNA JUST FORGET THIS OH MY GOD I HOPE CODY ISNT GOING ON A DRINKING BINGE I HOPE TO GOD. OH MY GOD.

[bmared]

Forgiveness.

To some, it's the literal definition.

To me, it meant letting someone have their way with whatever they want.

After a long, difficult battle, the shark themed villain, dubbed "Placoi" by the media, seemed to disappear into thin air.

"Damn it, she always seems to get away, doesnt she?" My young ward, Overcharge, asked.

I only nodded in agreement, but the smile on my face showed nothing but absolute joy. I could barely contain my excitement, and it took all my effort not to squeal with joy, like my mild mannered alter ego would. After months of battling, and racking up millions of dollars in damages, we were so close to stopping her.

Back in our lair, on a remote island, I'm taking off my super suit, when my phone gets a call.

"Miss Mabry," it's my assistant. "You have an appointment in twenty. Get here on time or I'm removing your coffee priviledges."

"Okay, Piper, I-" I was cut off.

"You have a caller ma'am. Someone named 'Alyssa Dukes'? D'you want me to patch her through?" Piper asked.

I rubbed my temples. Fifth time today I've had a random caller. It better not be a marketer.

The call goes through and I hear on the opposite end,"Hello? Is this Miss Mabry?" The voice is very familiar.

"Yes this is, how can I help you?" I answer with confusion.

The caller, Alyssa, replies,"We need to talk about your work ethic. You, almost catching me, again? Hahaha."

A chill goes down my spine. "How, in the hell, did you find out?"

"Tracker." She replies. "You use a tracker on all your shit to keep track of it. Last week, a prototype coffee machine went missing from one of your stores. Unfortunately, the chip wore out after an hour. Fortunately, I was able to mimic the signal with my own piece of crap hardware, and what do i find? Miss Alyx Mabry is "Shark Match"? I mean, c'mon. Give me a little credit."

"What happens now?" I ask.

"Now, nothing. But a week from now, you'll know. And, dont worry. I wont share your secret as long as your secretary deletes this audio as soon as you've finished tracking my signal. Come alone. I'll be there by myself."

The call ends, and I have a location.

"Ma'am?" Piper asks.

"I guess I'm losing coffee priviledge, huh?"

"Same cover?" She prompts.

"No, tell them I just didn't want to come."

--------------------------------------------------

I get to the site the call led me to, and I find it's an abandoned warehouse on the edge of town. One of mine.

I get inside, and theres a table set up for what looks like dinner. A woman sits at the table with her back to me. I pull out my capture gun and launch a volley at her. It wraps around, and I hear the click telling me its locked in place.

"Oh, tsk tsk tsk. I told you unarmed." I hear from her. "But I guess, seeing as how this isnt technically a 'firearm', it doesnt count."

I approach her, slowly.

"Dont be afraid, sweetheart. If I wanted to hurt you, I would've went after that brat of yours, 'Overcharge'. By the way, what kind of douche calls 'imself 'overcharge'?"

I round the table and sit in the open chair.

"So, why did you call?" I ask, eyeing the spaghetti.

"I didn't poison it, if that's what your wondering." She answers. "And, I called you here because I have a proposition for ya'."

"Not interested" I answer quickly.

"Oh, c'mon. You dont even know what it is."

"Dont need to." I take a bite. I dont care if its poisoned, it tastes delicious. Weird after taste, though.

"Actually, you might wanna. The sleeping pill is gonna take effect soon, what with your heightened metabolism and all."

"Damnit" I bang my head on the table.

"I'm kidding" she says.

She flexes, and the ropes break, and I flinch.

I look up at her, and shes standing next to the table, in a black suit that hugs her curves.

"All I'm asking for is your forgiveness, and I'll stop all my crimes." She says, seriously.

"You arent serious, are you? The public would never allow that! You'd be lucky with life in prison." I yell.

"But what the public doesn't know, wont hurt them." She prompts.

"Huh?"

"Hear me out," she asks," we continue this whole 'pissing contest' in public, I terrorize the citizens, bring what seems like calamity, and you 'stop me'." She says, using air quotes. "During our fights, I'll cause little to no structural damages, I'll keep my zero body count-yes, I've kept track- and I'll put up practically no fight. How does that sound?"

"Like you actually did drug me."I reply with a straight face.

"Whether or not you believe me, or even accept this, it's still gonna happen." She sits back down and takes a bite of bread.

"What even prompted this?" I ask.

"I fell in love, and realized who I love will never accept me the way I am right now." She says.

"Wha?"

"Look, the answers not important. Just know I'll be cutting back on crime time."

"Why couldnt you have just said that?"

"Would you have believed me?"

I take a second.

"Yeah, you're probably right."

--------------------------------------------------

Months later, and she was true to her word. I'd only fought her 12 times, about a third of her original time, and not so much as a scratch was put on the buildings.

During those months, I actually spent time with her, learning her past, trying to understand her. After hearing her story, it was no wonder she did what she did. With parents who acted like that, I woulda snapped. Slowly, ever so slowly, I realized we had a blossoming friendship. I saw a lot -probably too much- of myself in her. We got into a rhythm of after fighting, to sit down and talk.

After the twelfth fight, I finally had the courage to ask, "So, who was this mysterious man you fell in love with?"

She looked at me with a pained look.

"Nevermind that," she waved away the question. "Tell me, is there anyone in your life whose caught your eye?"

"Nuh-uh. You cant turn this on me. I asked you first." I stared her down.

"Fine." She said, breaking eye contact and staring at her lap, where she cradled a cup of tea. "First, before I tell you, you ahve to answer this question."

"It better not be a relationship question."

"Its not." She says. She looks around, closes her eyes, and stares at me, saying, "Do you think anybody can be redeemed? Do you think anyone can get forgiveness for any deed done, barring murder?" She bites her lip in worry.

I shake my head and giggle a little. "You've already asked this, and I said yes."

"I know, I just need to get enough courage to confess to you." She says.

"Wha-?"

She interrupts."I fell in love with you, but because I'm a villain, and you're a hero, I thought I could never tell you that. But, after all this time, I've grown as a person. I've still got some way to go, though."

"I-im flattered that you think that way, but-"

"You're straight, arent you, of course you are, why wouldnt you be. You're literally the perfect woman, and her I am, being a negative influence on everyone. I should've never invited you over, I'm sorry." She runs away, before I could stop her.

I get up and call after her, yelling "Alyssa!" But she either cant hear me, or doesn't want to. I dont panic, though. I cant. My phone starts to ring, and Its my assistant.

"Damnit Piper" I answer. "Now's probably the worst time. What do you want?"

"Its almost time for your speech. And, my names Jannet." She says blankly. Speech? I think to myself.

"Sorry, Jannet. I'm still trying to get used to Piper not being here." Is what I actually say.

"You're the one who promoted her."

I hang up and look towards the door Alyssa ran out. I take a step towards it, when my phone rings with a reminder. I glance at it, it says 'Mayoral inaugural speech'.

I put my phone down, and race towards the other door. I open it, and inside is my suit.

"Well, Shark Match," I say to myself," Time to Come out of the closet so your crush doesn't destroy New Yallk City. Man, sounds like a bad autobiography. Or a fanfiction title.

-------------------------------------------

The Mayor is exactly like you'd imagine him. Slimy and not particularly firm in any ideology that doesn't secure his vote. As a citizen asked to prepare a speech to secure to African American vote, I lost all faith in this man. But today I lost the additional bit of faith I didn't even realize I had. I don't like to keep up with politics, as someone in my line of work shouldn't, so it was a surprise to me when, in the middle of my speech, someone from the paper yelled "Why are you against gay marriage? Is it because of your parents."

"Who said that?" I yell. "I was trying to find some way to put it, but it didnt feel natural until now. It'd be pretty bad for my community if I went against it, now wouldn't it? I didnt even realize this man" I point to the mayor, "thought like that. What, do I need to wear the lesbian flag as a Cape now? Actually, that be awesome."

I shoot one more glare at the mayor, who's sweating by now. "Give him one term. If he doesnt clean up his act by then, I'll run for mayor myself. I'll even reveal myself at that point. Hows that sound?" The crowd cheers.

The dinner afterward was a littel awkward on his end, but only one thought kept going through my head. 'Did Alyssa see?'

----------------------------------------------

It was midnight when I heard my window squeak. I heard footsteps come close to my bed, a piece of paper get placed on my nightstand, and footsteps retreat.

I wait a minute, then get out of bed and turn on a light. The paper says "This friday, Same warehouse, 9pm. Wear something sexy, I need to apologize.

-Signed

Alyssa dukes"

I smile and set the note back down, pleasant thoughts accompanying me to dreamland..

[haveyouseenthisskeleton]

Hi, thank for doing this and for hopefully not minding the other ask i sent, im hoping for a dude.

Qualities:

Loyalty, encouraging, very family oriented.

flaws:

on my phone too much, mostly to keep my hands busy, i AM paying attention! An awful sweet tooth. Push over :( i dont wanna disappoint people. Ask me to get you a cup of water and i’ll say no like im offended while getting you that water.

lots of half baked hobbies, i dont stay on one thing for long (crocheting, perler beads, little crafty stuff, rpg games, i do DO them just with long pauses between them)

lazy, i dont like cleaning but will help and willingly do the dishes.

i have no problem laughing at myself and have thick skin for it, once my friend  spent an hour telling me how my fav sweater was so ugly a thrift store would pay me to give it to them out of pity and it was THE funniest thing and did not stop me from loving that sweater.

Really just love to appreciate art and fiction, what people can make is amazing just watching my friends draw or paint is really cool and fascinating!

Im a bit spacey, one time i forgot what a higfive was and gave them a hand hug instead.

Anothing thing is i cant be anyones drinking buddy, i dont drink or smoke, tho i dont mind people who do.

I’d like:

Someone whos comfortable with a lot of casual physical affection but wont get offended or take it personally when i need to be alone (not in a sad way just in a recharge way)

i dont use makeup ever and will not be told to dress up when i dont want to but i will accept help and suggestions when i do want to dress up. 

Cannot under any circumstances throw away or replace my stuff without talking to me first.

Any dude i end up with is gonna have to deal with my hoarding, cute boxes, random items, old trinkets, boy we’re going THRIFTING and im re organizing the Collection of random items i like, possible that WE like 😳

Really like cats but believe they need to be indoors so you GOTTA have good enrichment for them. Dogs are great i just dont think id have the energy to take them for runs or walks as much as most dogs need. 

I really like soups, soups with wantons and dumplings are pretty good to!

hope this isnt too much stuff??? would have used asks but only let me use like, less than 400 characters which is less than from other asks you posted so idk what thats about. anyways, thanks again!

___________________________________________

Hi !

It was a very difficult one, with lots of possibilities. For the other potential candidates, you had : UT Sans, UT Asgore, HT Sans, HF Sans, Dancetale Sans, D!Papyrus... But a very surprising one managed to beat them all, and it's...

DUSTALE SANS (Dune) !

Well, Dune is not an easy guy. You're not always understanding how his brain works, but at least, every day is an interisting experience.

Dune is very loyal. It takes literal months to gain his trust, but once he is trusting you, he can put his life in your hands blindly. He is lazy too, and you can sometimes mistake him for a cat with his weird habits. He needs encouragement to know when something he's doing is right, because after what happened Underground he has a very low self-esteem. He doesn't mind you being family oriented, even if you can see there's sometimes a small light that shuts in his eyes when you're talking about siblings. He's fine with your need to keep your mind busy, as long as he can just lay down in the couch and don't do anything during this time.

He has some difficulties with the push-over thingy however, since it's something Frisk did with him for a long time and he can get defensive when it happens. He has a sweet teeth too and loves eating garbage food. He has a certain sense of humor made of jokes about blood and corpses, but lighter jokes might makes him think of new soft ones. He's fine with creative activities, despite being bad at it. He is very forgetful and will need constant reminders of where to put things, because he gives up easily when he does'nt find something.

No worry for the affectionnate part. Dune has weird ways to show affections, like bringing you dead mouses like a cat, but he doesn't mind napping in your arms if it's what you wants. He understands if you need space, no problem, he can use this time to wander in the woods like the weirdo he is. He doesn't borrow things. However, there's a high chance you find him sometimes sleeping in your wardrobe. It's technically not borrowing your clothes if they are still in the wardrobe.

He's fine with cats, but it will take some time to explain him to not hunt the cat down. Once this phase is done, they are best buddies and you'll find them in all of his nap spots together. He's ok with soup. Well, he's ok with most of food actually (except spaghettis, for obvious reasons). He's a food vacuum, don't let anything on sight or he's taking it.

It's a bit of challenge, but Dune can be a great partner if you take time to learn how he is working !

[gryphsdeadbones]

hey from one nd person to another the comic where fm gordon says a slur seems kind of in poor taste. ik ur not intentionally making light of it and tht occurring in fm should be criticized but while you dont make it out to be a good thing making jokes about it and calling him a "slurboy" is kind of questionable? it makes it seem more like a plotpoint and angst rather than the creator of fm genuinely fucking up in the past (and having moved on from it)! i think exploring fm coming to terms with being nd is a good idea but this isnt the best way to do it. if you want me to explain my point more lmk if/when u post this and i will! someone already made a post abt it but it was kinda strongly worded and i wanted to approach you more calmly because i genuinely dont want to call you out or start drama or anything ;-;

first off thank you for being civil and patient with me i appreciate this ask a lot- also this got long- im not in a flying rage or anything when i bold or emphasis text, i just needed it also for my own readability and since im not the best at wording- hopefully this hellsite works and my response is under the cut

i would like to know how is it in poor taste when freemind explicitly gets clocked at the very end for saying it. the entire point of the comic was to show that saying the r slur has existed in his source and is bad

im not sure how much more direct i can get, with the disclaimer/warning list growing longer and longer and out there for a huge sign that says “this au can get dark as fuck and these subject matters are treated seriously/not something to mess around with.” Like yes, there are some jokes in the asks and other comics, but that specific comic is not supposed to be “haha thats funny”. it has a serious tone using a rough sketch style bc i was super tired and wanted to vent

was it just the direct reference to it that just made people uncomfortable? because thats 100% understandable, and i made sure i tagged it appropriately (although admittedly, a little bit late since i thought the filter would catch at least the main thing)

i think what some people somehow got from it is “exploring sensitive content = endorsing said content” which! that is not the intent! i absolutely do not want people saying that word! I don’t want people thinking that is any way okay for this character to say

its more of a damned if i do address it, damned if i dont.

if it never comes up, people are gonna assume that ‘oh this character says slurs and is shit, surely the creator or fan-creator MUST be okay with it and woobifies freemind and absolves him of any mistakes’ or something like that. no. this asshole has an arc and i want to do it right. its serious and i think it shouldn’t be shoved under the rug

and people just. dont want to read for context for whatever reason. theyll start watching it and get taken aback by the slur and start blaming me ‘hey you never warned for this’ when very early on i keep mentioning over and over ‘you dont have to watch it if you dont want to! This has slurs and 2000s internet brand humor/style’ You really dont, I’m not forcing you to watch it- Literally all you need to know is either canon half life or hl/vrai. thats it. fm mostly follows hl1 with very slight changes.

so i had to make something that:

1. warns people who arent aware and dont want to go through my asks or about/warning pages (for whatever reason) and just want to see the art

2. also NOT downplay freemind’s canon assholery. listen, i kinda despise writing mean and cruel characters, theyre hard to do, and a lot of people get shit for doing it wrong or people going “character = author”

i’ve also considered leaving the bubbles blank, but then people could fill it with whatever they want, then blame me for being vague. or they’d fill it in with a different kind of slur that freemind has never used, even if he MIGHT be the type to do that. I needed to explicitly mention that it is ableist slur. There are shitty racist and other problematic jokes, but never those kinds of extreme racial slurs to my knowledge.

Although I do see your point that maybe joking about it outside of the serious stuff might not be the best route. The slurboy jokes are getting stale, and I will try a better way to remind people.

The thing that gets to me is that it feels people are more than ready to defend either Ross Scott or Gordon Freeman the fictonal character himself. I don’t??? really care for Ross Scott, so I don’t know if he’s ever brought it up specifically. I’m not really calling him out or cancelling him. Idc for some white man’s feelings, im only bringing the timeframe of That era and reworking it to fit in This current era.

And I hate to break it to people: Gordon Freeman is a blank slate character, you can project whatever the hell you want on him as long as it’s not freakshit illegal garbage. The machinimas (fm, hl/vrai) do have SOME characterization that I want to nail down. It fucking sucks when characters are ooc, and I’m trying not to do that, even if it means sacrificing some comfort. But still mostly staying in my comfort zone if that makes sense

Now about the callout that I do not want to engage with the op directly:

Honestly im very surprised the comic was called out when i just. thought my stuff is relatively tame on exploring the bad shit canon freemind does. ive seen him in fancontent where they really dont hold back and its still played off as ‘kinda funny’ tone.

I really don’t know if people just want any reason to hate me for whatever reason. That’s fine I guess, I can’t please everyone and they dont have to like me.

But like. isn’t it so much easier for the op of that to block me and the post and move on. Why kick up such a fuss. I can see that thinly veiled death threat of a vague. That’s pretty fucked up- Like holy fucking god, you do not have to like my stuff. I’m not holding you at knifepoint to like my stuff. I’ve specifically made two different tags (one general au, one specific au) if anyone wants to blacklist it for their own reasons I do not need to know. I don’t want to know.

You’re allowed to be uncomfortable. You’re allowed to unfollow/blacklist/block.

However you just don’t go ranting about it for something you horribly misinterpreted. If it bothers you so badly, literally just. drop me a message to clarify. thats it. or save yourself the time and block me.

I’ve blocked the op for both our sakes, but if anyone wants to send this post to them, then thats fine. I don’t want anything to do with them.

I don’t want to link the post and blow it up. I just want shit clarified, dropped and we can move the fuck on with our lives. 

If you’re reading this and don’t know what the post is, please don’t bother. I do not want people going after the op with threats, please keep it civil, I’d prefer if you don’t engage with the post at all on my behalf.

Despite this huge wall of text, I do not want this to be a big deal, so please don’t ask me about the details.

_

As for anon, feel free to dm me either on here or. Maybe on discord if you’d still like to suggest or have something more cleared up. I’m still willing to hear any kind of feedback, and i want to thank you again for being reasonable about this

[misterbitches]

wbl has mitigating circumstances that make sense wITHIN the story. non consensuality isn’t ok but there’s a foundation we see which, yes, is majorly failed in other tv shows. there are other ways to show whattever it is they feel like it (i watched the end of ep 2, im just too fuckin depressed rn to even think) but it’s intersting the cruelty exists not in A vacuum but the world with WBL creates where we can see that stark difference. something many BLs and shows in gen like kdramas or teen or new adult (essentially every youthfoul show cos exploitation and creator not caring) understand. TT is  a prime example of how it just doesn’t make sense these types of relationships unless there’s a solid enough foundation and at least a mild understanding of the inappropriateness.

right now, the toxicity is born out of like actual conflict. wer i  in in this situation, would i do any of that? no. in fact i’d beat anyone’s ass for ever manhandling me that way. i  want to itereate here emphasis none of this behavior is ok. since it is a tv show, they have more control and could ostensibly  have not written that. however, it’s okay for a show to flub that message, make us uncomfortable, or even truly fuck up the way we think it’s fucked up. i do NOT advise this to be a plan. HOWEVER: PEOPLE DO MAKE MISTAKES. the reddest flag of all is: ARE THEY WILLING TO CHANGE? if they are not, they do NOT deserve to be together.

which mbrings me here. theyre giving us a reason why.

the program gives itself the space and the foreground for it to be a story that isnt fuocused on how much they fuck and fight. ergo these behaviours cannot be repeated bc theyre in this instance. so many viewers of everything say people expect media to be perfect. no. we dont. it’s impossible and we live in a trash disgusting racist capitaist garbage hellfire. what you mean is you want to see people make mistakes but ultimately transgress them and sometimes people just do shit we wouldn’t forgive, or is  messed up, or the writers need to make DAMN FUCKING SURE is clear. 

but unlike most shows esp targeted for young teens both het and BL, thte consequences of love or what love means to young people is so skewed and poorly done because it’s by people who AREN’T that age, don’t know howhumans work, shit like that. i mean u can just tell by the acting even as sam is really goof and most experienced but has a real whole life outside of this persona, a girlfriend, goals of acting probably; showing what it’s like to be human in a way but not a projection of human fantasy through rape culture.

we like to see dysfunction for two reasons: as a way to get out of it or as a redemption arc

but for people who are making cheap shows for kids who don’t need to think about it it’s like: shitty execution, gross love, and no context for why they should even CONTINUE to stay together on top of the harm 

wbl is far from perfect like any other show  but it’s wil what happens when intentions are clear when you show them and so it’s easier for all of us to process. not to mention they built this story through blocks, the way one is supposed to, the relationship of the two of them when they hadn’t been intimate is very different from now 

GSD has to tell the truth, SY has to grow up, rich ppl suck. but it’s a good ride

as an aside is sam lin’s gf cute i hope so but like in a fun way idc abt model bitches it’s so obvious when men do that lmaoooooo but omg! i hope hes happy and also he and mr yu stay friends fro a long time!

oh and i wanna add that GSD’s life revolving around his love for shi yu is actually untrue. it’s a projectiona nd i think the illusion of that projection is brokena nd that’s a good thing. the show sets up an ensemble cast we vibe with, want to see, appreciate, and that means GSD has friends and loves. his life revolves aruond him and the way he sees the romance but he would have never let his mom go to the US by himself and i really hope the show explores why it is IMPERATIVE for him to find his own personhood and not just take care of others. 

his mom would want him to love every bit of his life. all consuming love is so beautiful but it’s only beautiful when you realize you have to survive to love someone so well. and when you survive and understand yourself, your loved ones feel it. they’re very reliable as a group friends and a people and shi de is and will always be a human outside of yu. he has to understand that. it was nice to see his anger at being played too cos it’s like yea that’s fucking disgusting and it hurts and kills you

i’m going to continue to assess the volatility within the story and its progression as much as i can if i can handle being online. this show really exceeds a lot of expectations and mostly i think i forget....it’s actually fun. i was so happy to see the way the dad came into the room in the morning bc i think that was so sweet and hopefully is an indicator of why he said to do what he did. unfortunately homophobic or not: he fucked up. majorly. as a parent, a confideant, a loved one. you do not do that. i am sorry. but they can bounce back. but that’s a lot of pain, ok? 

also i hate rich ppl did i mention that

oh one more thing idk if they had sex but dramas love to do the whole drunk ppl fucking thing and it’s fucking disgusting and will always be :)

[nuclearmu5hroom]

Fallout 4 OC Companion:

Dr. Drake Fenring (Institute)

This had been going around a long ass time ago and wanted to do one up for my boy.

Drake would be considered "hard mode" as far as building affinity, and honestly it takes a special kind of person to want to have this guy around for more than 10 minutes.

I did not include any romance or personal quest dialogue

NAME: Drake Fenring

FOUND: Diamond City

COMPANION PERK: "Vision of Health": when traveling with gain passive health regeneration, when dismissed still benefit from +1 Intelligence 

WEAPON OF CHOICE: Ballistic Rifles

- Envy: a silenced, hardened lever action

More under the cut...

I THINK WE SHOULD TRAVEL TOGETHER:

. "Thinking doesn't seem like your strong suit. I guess I have to come along."

. "Against my better judgement, fine. I was bored here anyway."

. "You do realize what you're asking, right?"

 USE MELEE:

. "Are you insane?! I can't use this thing?!"

. "Sharper the blade, less mistakes are made."

. "Yes, lets put your doctor in the front lines. Brilliant." 

USE RANGED:

. "This will do."

. "Ever see someone perform surgery with a rifle before?"

. "This weapon better be up to my standards."

OPEN INVENTORY:

. "I suppose you want me to carry your garbage now, is that it?"

. "Get it over with."

. "Big surprise, something else you want me to haul"

IF OVERENCUMBERED:

. "Really? Again?"

. "Imagine if you applied this tenacity towards collecting better intel instead of junk."

. "Hmm sorry, must be having trouble with my eyes….I can't see myself carrying that crap for you."

STAY CLOSE:

. "Wh-why? Isnt this close enough for you?"

. "Maybe I will."

. "Maybe I won't"

KEEP DISTANCE:

. "If you want it done wrong, then fine."

. "Finally, you said something sensible."

. "Another brilliant suggestion."

STEALTH:

. "Hopefully, you'll remember to breathe a little quieter this time."

. "This isn't a very sound idea. Get it? Because its quiet? Oh give me a break."

. "Shhhiiiiiit. Well, looks like we'll have company."

BACK UP:

."Oh this should be interesting…"

. "I've already hypothesized about this scenario and honestly its not in your favor."

. "Whatever you say, killer."

BE PASSIVE:

. "No one is going to respect a pushover."

. "What? That's it?! That's all?!"

. "Better hold your temper now and save it for the right time."

BE AGGRESSIVE:

. "Well now, someone finally showed up to the party."

. "Be quick but don't be stupid."

. "Don't look now, your childhood trauma is showing."

USE STIMPAK:

. "Gotta love a little blood in the spit."

. "Okay I'll admit, that one had punch."

. "Why are you looking at me like that? Get back out there!"

WAIT HERE:

. "Make me."

. "Why, so you can ditch me?"

. "Make it fast."

FOLLOW ME:

. "You're joking, right?"

. "You again."

. "The things I do for science…"

DISMISSED:

."Excellent, I can get real work done."

."Don't die. That's all."

. "Next time, schedule in advance."

SEND HOME (Diamond City):

. "I wonder how big the mountain of paperwork will be after this?"

. "Hopefully we won't see too much more of each other."

. "Its been...something."

ENEMIES (long range - or compliments on player character’s confirmed kill using a sniper rifle on long ranged target)

. "Admirable shot. Luck? 

. "Tch, that was dirty. Do that again..."

. "This is what people pay you for."

ENEMIES (close range)

. "I do enjoy the scent of blood this close."

. "Sometimes getting dirty is part of the job."

. "You'd be fun to watch in an operating room."

AGGRESSION: aggressive/not aggressive/very aggressive/frenzied

CONFIDENCE: cowardly/cautious/average/brave/foolhardy

ASSISTANCE: helps nobody/helps allies/helps friends and allies

  LOSE AS COMPANION PERMANENTLY:

. Side with Railroad 

. Side with BOS

. Free escaping Synths

. Destroy the Institute

. Affinity too low

[haemosexuality]

cw for me being extremely not okay and personal like idk dont read this pls i just need to say it somewhere im just posting this bc if I actually say it somewhere instead of just thinking it to myself its better to keep doing it but, I'm toxic. I'm a toxic friend. Not intentionally but I can't deny my (unexisting) mental health makes me toxic and stressful and annoying and a bad friend in general. I could really just spend hours listing toxic behavior. If im in the wrong I cant deal with it, if the other person is in the wrong I cant deal with it, vene if everything is perfectly fine and theres no conflict happening at all I still cant help being extremely tiring and too much to deal with so im just going to isolate myself. Is not like I have a lot of friends irl, literally just one so its not gonna be hard anyway. Ive been just so much lately shell prob just assume im mad at her and agree with people that say im garbage so like, yeah. I just hope I can actually stop talking to her for real isntead of spending one month not talking to her and then coming back and amking everything worse bc thats all i always do tbh, since always, ive never been fine mentally and ive never not been absolutely toxic to every single one of my friends simply bc im too fucked up itd be so simble if shed just fucking realized that already or made she already has but doesnt wanna leave me bc she knows i have abandonment issues and itd compleyely fuck me up and shes always putting other people first she already has enough on her plate and i hate being a problem for her and its not like i can helo her in any way, just try to and nake it worse, so its just better for everyone if itd just fucking stop caring about her so much but since i cant i can admit that stop being her friend will only do her good she has enough friends and enough people thay got tired of me to not only keep her company and help but to also encourage her to not talk to me i just hope she gets better and doesnt kill herself or tries to again and if me getting away from her helps than so be it this is really just rambling ab me feeling sorry for being a piece of shit boohoo but as much as i ******* ** *** i cant but if i dont say this somewhere i will so yeah i hate having friends bc i love everyone too much but im fucked up and always end up fucking things up and people either hurt me too making me even more fucked up or i hurt them and ruin everything bc im fucked up this isnt about me i cant get out, my birthday ""party"" and trip got cancelled, so im not going to see her for a long time. idk what im going to do when corona dies out and my parents wanna reschedule the trip bc i cant uninvite her and i cant call it off bc my parents are gonna want to know why and id prefer death than opening up to them so idk what im going to do. hopefully she uninvites herself i dont deserve her anyway im sick of writing im gonna isolate myself and push people away yeehaw and not kms bc i cant do my parents dirty like this

[zelinkslullaby]

I've got a wild question

So. I've been wanting a lot of things lately *cough*DimitriCharms*cough*

And I feel really bad always asking my parents to buy them for me cause I'm currently not in a place to get a job (hopefully soon though! But I am vry scared....)

SO! This is my wild question.

If I were to maybe, allow people to commission me for drawings and stories (just one shots really)... Would anyone do so?

I know my stuff really isnt all that great. My drawings are pretty garbage and my writing isnt very... long or as detailed as other peoples. But I know some people like it.

It would really only be from the Legend of Zelda and Fire Emblem I think. I'm really not able to offer much but hey, I figured it was worth asking. (Itd also be very cheap cause ya know... that 😅)

I also think maybe it'd make me feel a little better about myself knowing people like my things? And maybe it'd motivate me more since people would be wanting it and waiting for it

[brunhiddensmusings]

argument starters

top ten statements on my mind that might start moderately intellectual debates A- rick and morty still exists primarily as a vehicle to create more funko pop models and most episodes are written for the sole purpose of such B- the movie industry has learned nothing from marvel, not even marvel has learned from marvel. nor have they learned what made the original starwars films beloved, or lord of the rings, despite having literal decades to have studied it and having actual classes in colleges for filmography majors to have figured this out by now. or really learned anything from any good movie on what those movies did well regardless of if they were as big as those trilogies or if they were as off in left field as asking what worked about ‘labrynth’ and what didnt. any movie that ‘fails’ is assumed that the elements of the movies are what made it fail, not that it was poorly made and bad, so the attack will always be on any innovation of the movie or the genre, so that the studio shuns anything that isnt formulaic and safe even if that would also produce a garbage movie. honestly twats on youtube analyzing movies actually -DO- know more about what makes a movie shit or good then the actual executives in charge of multi billion dollar companies and thats both scary and satisfying. B part 2- this may sound like a petty concern but its literally an industry the not only employs millions of people and is worth a severe chunk of the economy but also is involved with shaping culture and whats seen and what is critisized, movies and tv impact the world by changing what people see as normal and guiding their worldview C- naruto, as flawed a thing as it is also has reason people enjoy it, however it could have been made into legitimately impressive and quality content if -naruto himself is not the main focus, he is instead a prominent side charachter -rock lee is the focus, as he actually idealizes the point of the show about hard work being more important then natural ability and isnt as much a twit -just put sasuke in the trash can, close the lid -open the lid briefly to also dump in the weird obsession with bloodlines, birthright superpowers, and reincarnations that make hardwork pointless as everyone has a lineage of superninjawizard powers over and above the normal ninjawizard powers so if your dad wasnt ninja-merlin you arent worth shit D- there is nothing wrong with zombie based media, its just mostly created by people who have no fucking clue how to use zombies in a story D part 2- if your moral is ‘man is the real monster’ i need to slap you E- creepypastas and SCPs are actually a very good practice ground for aspiring writers to toy with ideas within a prompt framework its just that we see predominantly derivative early works of people that hopefully later go on to surpass their bad fanfiction stage and we need to re-approach the style with the ambition to actually do something with the setting and move past the sea of cheap knockoff psycho teen with knife stories and thing that makes people die F- capitalism may be extremely flawed but ‘free market’ concepts can exist without capitalism much like socialism can exist alongside democracy G- avacados, while healthy, are relatively flavorless in addition to being damaging agraculturally due to how water demanding they are despite often being grown in areas with water shortages but are also being seen as a finantial diversification for cartels that typically manage drugs. avacado money actively funds gang violence H- well meaning people unintentionally hurt their cause all the time yet calling them out on it weakens the cause by creating needless infighting I- pie is an acceptable meal option, cheesecake is a pie not a cake, cheesecake might not be the best meal choice but its ironically far from the worst J- kickstarter, youtube, and patreon are amazing ideas that allow creators to actually produce content without relying on pitching a concept to a giant soulless corporation that will inevitably crush any innovation even on the tiny fraction of creators they ever say yes to and will only say yes to pitches that are garbage, however these platforms have taken such massive hits to reputation that they may soon become unusable for that intended purpose. you may feel bitter about mighty number nine style fiascos or ultra fake douchebros who have airhorns on every video as they tell you to smash their button but that bitterness threatens actual opportunities for real creativity and very worthwhile things being made K- shakespeare shouldn't really be given any more reverence then any other author, really no writer should be put on a higher pedistal simply because they were from a certain era of writing. conversely popular current/modern literature isnt inherently worse or better then the ‘classics’ as all the classics were popular/modern at some point in the past which is the only reason knowlege of them survived till to day for people to assume theyre somehow more profound

[thedapperrabbit]

She-Ra Rewatch: season 3 and onwards through season 4, and boatloads of Introspection time!

So Ive been rewatching She-Ra with my partner, because sharing Entrapdak is caring. I could probably squee on about that for a century or more (because eeee, sharing things i love with people i love AND THEY EVEN PAY ATTENTION TO THE THINGS AND REMEMBER THEM!)...but ill spare you, kind internet strangers who for some reason find my thoughts mildly interesting enough to be reading this. This is going to be a lot. Like, a LOT. A lot especially from a stranger that youve probably only seen a notification from due to me sticking a heart on your content or for reblogging something lovely youve made in pictures or words. I dont think anything is going to be violently trigger-y because im not always great at judging that stuff and also ive yet to feel quite comfy enough to be  fully open-posting specifics about my own past trauma, other than a vague allusion to self-harm and distant-ish unspecified abuse aaaand the usual childhood garbage truck of assholes....but i suppose you could possibly draw some darker potential conclusions from the content im focused on. Also, my ADHD makes it incredibly hard to keep to a straight and non-branching narrative so...ramble-y bits and expressions of brain frustration ahoy. Either way...you are forewarned, just in case. Sorry in advance, this is going to be a small booklet by the time Im done explaining, and thinking, and then attempting to stick words to abstract feels which sometimes im great at, and then others i fucking suck at...but at least this is all written and not me trying to say this to any of your faces! Thats....a mercy all of its own. Haa...  Anyway, while rewatching with my partner, I realized just how much more painful parts of it are to sit through now...they were the first time, and each time since, but NOW having spent a while mulling over the series as a whole a bunch, and reading a lot of other peoples writings on here and finding myself largely in agreement with most Entrapdak fan’s assessment of things, I just....feel like all the air is ripped out of me during some moments, watching  with keener insight. And despite thinking i had myself reasonably well figured out by my age, its all also made me further consider a few things about myself as well. Particularly my notable internalized fury response to chunks of it which have been consistent through all my viewings of SPOP. With Hordak at least, its way easier to understand my reactions. For me at least. Maybe not so much for the people around me. And, shittier due to intensity and subject matter, but still easier in the long run because...the broken bits in me that he resonates with are fresher and sharper and still more recent, like within the last ten years, and thus more towards the front shelves in my head, compared to things that resonate with Entrapta, which are all old, lifelong dull aches at this point. I feel like nothing i can point to is fully sufficient to fully express my feels involving Hordak. But, maybe the best representative moment is with the crying i do every damn time I see his face looking up at Prime just after he glimmer and catra were beamed up...because ive seen that face in the mirror. I HAVE MADE THAT FACE. That same. Goddamn. Face. I may not have gotten a jab to the back of the neck directly from the person I made it at...but they often seemed to silently goad me to harm myself in an attempt to jolt my brain out of getting stuck in re-looping through what theyd just done/said to me. Likewise, much of his interactions with Entrapta are very...very weirdly familiar in feeling, but in a good way. Watching the stuff with Hordak hurts because fuck me if it isnt frequently like watching myself back in 2008ish to 2013, which was the duration of the worst parts of that particular circle of hell i parked my ass in. So...that makes sense. Hes so well written in those moments, it occasionally gave me PTSD flashbacks (still does a little, but now im prepared and braced for it and can shrug it back off....thanks, lifetime of therapy and years of studying abnormal psychology! Still totally not an expert, just very passionate...just, as a disclaimer).  Entrapta though...Entrapta is a different story. Mostly, I see Entrapta and in her free expressions of delight and joy and her bouncy enthusiasm I am reminded of a younger, less discouraged me in some ways, and in others, a “me” I could have been, but...well, extremely early-onset anxiety and depression made me insanely self-conscious super-super early on...not that i was great at hiding or...i guess the term people seem comfy with is “masking”? Which was a huge problem, or so it was in the 80s when far less was understood of such things. Id do so for a bit and then would forget to, in a way (because id forget long enough to go and trust again reflexively) and would get badly bullied and would squish everything down until id feel a crumb of safety again, and then almost instantly ADHD would pop that mask right the rest of the way off aaand it would start all over again. Ad nauseam until my teen years, where the depression sort of “fixed” that, and made it much easier to destroy my desire to share much of myself freely at all, save for with one or two people, and to a less deep extent a broader circle of nerd friends. Course, then i hit 30 and ran out of the majority of fucks I used to give. Or I became so damaged and salted with anger that parts of me dont grow any fucks anymore? Either way, plowshares to swords, WHEEEE!) And, maybe thats where this time while watching, I started to really think back to all that, and to how i see Entrapta treated by the other princesses, or really just in general except by Hordak...and why it burns my biscuits so badly. Every time I see someone roll their eyes at Entrapta’s beautiful unbridled enthusiasm or try to make it seem distasteful or at least weird and unwanted and uncomfortable for them but then dont even bother to try coming to terms with why they feel that way... or how they seem to feel free to grab and manhandle her without her consent, or the way they try to lessen her contributions because shes non-normative? Like its the fucking least she can do to make up for being weird in their space (...okay, that might just be the anger kicking in..but i dont feel like its an entirely innacurate assessment, is it?)  All of that...seeing it inflicted upon someone, It feels like someones punched me right in the damn sternum, but because its a hurt that im so desensitized to, it seems to have a much different effect than the sharp, violent crushing pain that i feel when I relate to Hordak a little too well for comfort. Again, i could go on, but its nothing more eloquent people on here havent already spoken volumes on. And my first gut reaction is always “I dont understand! why is that their reaction to her?! it doesnt seem logical at all, i dont seem to be able to parse it correctly, how is this acceptable? I HOPE SHE IMMOLATES YOU ALL.”. Which...I suppose isnt entirely usual for me (the silent wishing that people be immolated, I mean...i blame my past years of working in retail. And devouring too much Warhammer 40k contentl).  (oh gods...and this is going to be the most clusterfucky part cause i can feel my meds kicking in and thats gonna be hard to keep coherence on but i gotta get this all out of my head or ill forget it or get too scared of you fucking BRILLIANT insightful smart people on here and then ill continue to live scared and regretful that i never said..anything, and just sat here like “noticeme, entrapdak sempais!”  Ehhn...which is to say, if this is a garbage dump from here down, dont worry, when i wake up ill fix it...but hopefully itll at least make a tiny bit of sense ) But I realized something...something I hadnt ever rememberd much about due to the shitty neuronormative (apology if thats wrong term) behaviors continuing over years and years but in less and less directly aggressive ways as i grew older and was more prone to losing my shit in , (and likely because I got excessively lucky and managed through...uhhh...agonizing determination? Sheer stubbornness? Alleviatory rebalancing of universal karma? fuck if i know --to  curate a surprisingly supportive circle of other castoffs and misanthropes.) That was exactly how people used to treat me.  OKAY THISLL BE EDITED LATER to add in the rest of what i was gonna say...im...too full of Ambien sleep meds and damn write it anymore...and im aing trouble separating realigty and dream...an i k apawing at the kybord...not safe Lov yous for reading this far. Il fix it later, swears.

[bearballing]

2017

this year stressed me out so much but here is some good things that happened to me

>GOT MARRIED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! >went to florida 3 entire times >>did not have to put up with much of british winter >went to disney world for the first time ever (all four parks once, and also universal once) >saw bat out of hell: the musical three entire times (and am seeing it at least once next year) >had another 2 best days ever on top of those (queen + adam lambert, alice cooper) >swam in the sea. like i’ve never properly done that before. WARM SEA WATER, LADS >went to the beach like a lot >learnt what it was like to live without wanting to die over financial problems. it’s super nice. everyone should live like this. >got to live somewhere that ISNT a complete hell hole, since we gained the money to fix the goddamn house >got 3 kittens and i love them >became an uncle for the second time!! >my nephew learnt how to say my name >spent an anniversary with my wife in PERSON >saw one of my friends in person for the first time in 5 and a half years >levelled up a little bit in like... social garbage >gained a Fucktonne of vinyl records (and a new record player which was my last year christmas present but i only got to use it in april lol) >drew some Good Shit >REVIVED A TONNE OF MY OLD CHARACTERS FOR NEW PURPOSES AND REDEEMED THEM ALL. >paid off my PC loan >played so many video games, old and new, and i can remember like every playthrough. got so many steam and psn achievements.

hopefully next year can be MOVING HERE and MANY HUGE POLITICAL FIGURES BEING MURDERED HAVING A LIFE ALL THE TIME can be a thing. maybe getting my wife to the uk for a visit so i can drag her to the stupid musical

[whimzea-blog]

Can you finish the sex slave one please ?

This one is like three prompts in one from various points over the last couple of months lmao- it isnt done but i need to take a different direction for a minute and i dont want to lose this again lol

The great thing about Heath spending more and more time with Elijah and the twins was that he was getting great vlog footage. His videos were getting a ton more views, and he’d easily gained 100,000 subscribers in the past two months.

The bad thing about Heath spending more and more time with Elijah and the twins was that they were turning him into a sexual deviant.

“I am not, under any circumstances, going to put my fist in your ass. Ever.” Zane crossed his arms and gave Heath a look. “Never ask me again.”

“But Elijah said-”

“I don’t give a fuck what Elijah said,” Zane said, cutting him off. He ran a hand through his hair. “What’s up with all of this, Heath? Do you think what we do is boring? Is that why you keep suggesting all of this weird shit?”

Heath shook his head, but Zane didn’t believe him. “I don’t mind trying new stuff. But I have limits.”

“I’m sorry,” Heath said. He wrapped his arms around Zane’s neck. “I’ll stop.”

****

But two weeks later they were snuggling on the couch when Heath cleared his throat. “Baby?”

Zane knew that voice. It was the voice Heath used when he was going to as him to do something really fucked up.

“Yeah?” Zane said cautiously. Heath turned in Zane’s arms and bit his lip.

“I know that I said I’d stop bringing this stuff up-”

“Oh no,” Zane groaned, and Heath put a hand over his mouth.

“Just listen to me. I know I said I’d stop bringing this stuff up, but this one is pretty tame. Okay?”

Heath took his hand away and Zane gestured for him to continue- but he was skeptical.

“I was talking to Elijah about that night at the leather bar. As you know, I don’t remember a lot of it....and he was telling me that I was sort of into it. You know, the dom/sub stuff.”

“Actually, all you said was that you thought it would be hot if I wore a harness. You didn’t mention anything else,” Zane pointed out.

“Well, I still think it would be hot if you wore a harness, but I’ve been thinking about the other stuff. I think we should try it.” Heath looked at Zane hopefully.

Zane wasn’t opposed to the idea like he was to putting his fist in Heath’s ass- he just didn’t think it would work.

“Who would be the dom? If it’s me, this whole thing will last about five minutes. You hate when I tell you to do shit.”

“Of course you’d be the dom. And telling me to take out the garbage and telling me to get on my knees and suck your dick are a little bit different,” Heath replied, rolling his eyes.

That was sort of a nice image, but Zane wasn’t going to let himself get distracted. “I don’t know anything about this shit, baby. It would be a joke. A disaster.”

“Elijah showed me a website. It sort of explains things. You should look at it.”

Zane knew that Heath could tell this was one time that Zane might actually cave. He wasn’t surprised at all when Heath pressed up against him, giving him his best puppy dog eyes. “Please?”

Zane sighed. “Fine. But I’m not making any promises.”

****

Zane did look at the website, and without all of the...equipment (how could anyone get off on being flogged?) it was basically just one person giving orders, and the other person following them.

He learned that they’d still need a safe word, even without doing anything particularly rough or kinky, and that he’d need to make sure that Heath was comfy afterwards and knew that Zane really didn’t think he was his slave. Seeing as how Zane waited on Heath hand and foot most of the time, he didn’t think that would be a problem.

Zane was pretty confident he could do this. And he needed to give Heath something, at least, after all of the no’s. 

What he wasn’t sure about was how one went about starting something like this. Did he just walk up to Heath one night and go, “Hey, want to be my dirty little cockslut now?”

He cringed. Definitely not.

Fortunately, things fell into place without him having to do much of anything.

****

“Tomorrow after coffee, we have to go shopping,” Heath said. He pointed at Zane. “No arguing. I’m not going with you to this awards show if you look like a fucking scrub.”

“I have a suit already,” Zane whined. “Why do I need a new one?”

“Because I hate the one you have. And also, your body has changed a lot since you wore it the last time. Less flab, more ab.”

Zane scrunched up his nose. “Never say that again.”

“Don’t believe me? Try it on. Try on the whole thing, shirt, and tie, all that. You’re going to look ridiculous.”

“You know what? I will. I’m not wasting time or money on this shit again. It was bad enough the last time,” Zane grumbled. He stalked off to the bedroom and threw open his closet, pulling out his black suit and accoutrements. 

Ten minutes later he returned to the living room, where Heath was sitting on the couch. He spun around. “I look fine. Suck it.”

Heath pursed his lips and stood up. He looked Zane up and down. He adjusted his tie and smoothed down his collar and picked a piece of lint off his front pocket.

“It’s not as bad as I thought it would be,” Heath allowed. In reality, Zane looked gorgeous. Heath couldn’t remember why he hadn’t liked the suit the last time. And despite being thinner and more muscular, Zane still filled everything out perfectly. 

Zane smirked. “You like it, don’t you? You think I look good.”

“You look decent,” Heath said petulantly, although his words didn’t carry much weight considering he couldn’t stop touching Zane.

Heath unbuttoned Zane’s jacket and slid his hands underneath. They glided up the smooth silk of Zane’s shirt, over his firm chest, until one arm was wrapped around his neck and the other was tugging on his tie.

“Okay, you look hot,” Heath mumbled. Zane grinned in triumph but didn’t rub it in, and Heath was thankful.

[dalmascandwarf]

what shows are you keeping up with this anime season? I'm p much only watching Blend-S rn. If you're watching that as well, Kaho's just the greatest right??

I was actually going to do this at the end of the season but I will do it know since you asked.

Juuni Taisen: The plot deffo isnt super unique or anything but it is keeping me entertained and the music is GOOD

Osake wa Fuufu ni Natte kara: A super cute short about a stay at home (?) husband and a working wife that loves to get drunk, so her husband makes her different alcoholic beverages, each episode is 3 minutes so its good for a short feel good time.

Shokugeki no Souma San no Sara: Not much to say, I mean Shokugeki is a fucking phenomenal show and if you’re not watching it already you need to catch up boy

Kino no Tabi: The Beautiful World - The Animated Series: Really entertaining so far,  the episodes are interesting and each episode keeps my inattentive ass watching.

Shoujo Shuumatsu Ryokou: Cute show don’t really know where its going but the world is interesting and the two mains are fun to watch interact with each other. Also good music

Net-juu no Susume: I actually LOVE this show, I’m sufficently tired of MMO based anime BUT I find the characters to be pretty relateable and the plot of the show to be....semi-realistic. Also the music is really enjoyable and the title and ending credits are pretty creative.

Blend S: YEA I am watching Blend S and thoroughly enjoying it. The characters are lovable and watching them interact is actually very funny. I think some people passed this show up expecting it to be some moe loli harem garbage but its actually a comedy completely.

Mahoutsukai no Yome: I mean yeah, this is like the must watch of the season, great animation, music and plot. I recommend watching the 3 ep ova before you start the series tho, if i had gone straight into the show i think i might have been a little irritated with Chise as opposed to understanding where she is coming from.

Himouto! Umaru-chan R: yeah, i mean...its the 2nd season of umaru either take it or leave it. you know exactly what you are getting with this, although it does seem to have SOME character progression going on so...*shrug*

(And thats it! hopefully the links actually work...)

[mannimarcos]

how do I get into morrowind I really want to but it seems really complicated

the combat and the tempo of the game isnt for everyone but hopefully i can explain them conciselyi said this before making this post it ended up not being concise at all

so every action in this game is decided by a diceroll, basically. including combat

your main attributes, similarly to how it is in newer tes games, are health [red], magicka [blue], and fatigue (stamina) [green]. what many people overlook however, is that your fatigue bar also has an influence on the diceroll that indicates the chance of success of your actions - landing a hit with a weapon, casting a spell, etc

haha funny joke because its hard to keep your fatigue high because you use it up for jumping, running etc

but basically the “waving my weapon helplessly at an enemy” problem usually comes from overlooking your fatigue level, and not using the right weapon for your class

which is to say if your long blade skill is at, say, 5, and you try to hit an enemy with a longsword, its the equivalent of someone who’s never held a longsword in their hand waving it very slowly and clumsily at an enemy who has plenty of time to make a dodge. that’s basically how it looks in practice

the weird damage numbers on weapons that look like this 1-10 actually indicate how much damage you do when you make a short swing (first number; clicking) or a heavy attack (second number; holding down your mouse). there’s also usually separate damage stats for thrusting, chopping, and slashing, since different kinds of attacks are effective for different kinds of weapons (try stabbing someone with a hammer or whacking someone on the head using a spear like a stick, technically hurts but not as effective). whether you thrust chop or slash with your weapon depends on which way youre moving while attacking. if you want you can just check the “always use best attack” option in the menu and then you only gotta worry about the most effective of these stats for each weapon

magic is... both more complicated and less complicated. keep in mind that fatigue still affects whether or not your spells are successful. idk magic in morrowind rocks because you can make your own spells which is neat

levelling up is super similar to oblivion except you dont gotta find a bed. you can take a nap in a swamp if you want

the quest journal, while being pretty uh realistic and immersive, is kinda garbage and hard to organize. if you get a quest remember to exhaust all dialogue with the quest giver by asking all the questions you can. if you see a highlighted word, click it. there’s no quest markers or a compass but most of the time the quest giver will mark the location on your map, especially during the main quest, and from that you can just rely on your map and roadsigns. or just teleport in straight line to the objective. things get complicated if you only get some directions such as “follow this road until you see a tree, then circle around the tree and go left”, but even then i think its not as scary as people say, it’s actually quite cool and immersive, and if its too hard or the directions are too vague, remember that this 300-year-old games fanbase is massive and there are like 10 maps and guides on how to get to this place in some random sidequest on the internet

i think these are the basics... it’s not actually as complicated as people make it out to be. the key is talking to npcs a lot. and always having some potions on you. and using the correct armor and weapon for your class. and keeping in mind that the wildlife of vvardenfell will fuck you up. that’s basically it.

otherwise i found this game very easy to get into (unlike, say, daggerfall), it offers a lot of freedom and immersion, and it’s just really nice and cool to play.