#i actually was going to include jaime but i forgot he was in space

[adaraverse]

I may be really biased but the Jarco Boys are probably the most beautiful boys... Ray might be competition though. How did he get there?

There’s a lot of girl power within the NextGen but I really wanted to see how the boys of the metaverse would interact!!

OC Credits: Daniel - @starry-winds Jam - @moringmark Barron - @uiiyru Luca - @zemkaah95 Ray - @harchibudytgorichi

[youremyonlyhope]

Starship Rewatch

10 years ago today (well, yesterday since I’m posting it a day later), 15 year old Hope curled up on her couch to watch a new StarKid show called Starship right as it dropped. This was the first time I got to watch a show when it was posted since I didn’t become a StarKid fan until a months earlier. I was so excited.

And now, I’m rewatching Starship for the first time in full in at least 5 years I think. I listened to the soundtrack twice earlier today, singing along at my desk at work (thank god no one else was here tonight to judge me). I still know so many of the lyrics. And so many little jokes and stuff were flooding back. Starship was my favorite StarKid show for a long time, so I’m so excited to watch this again to see if it’s still my fave.

This post ended up being really long, so you’ve been warned. But it also includes pictures of the crocheted Roach and Bugette plushies that I made as a teen.

OH. THE OLD LOGO. AHHH. I already have so many feels. The future is now! I can’t handle this. The nostalgia! The Galactic League of Extraterrestrial Exploration. My facebook account to this day says I am a Starship Ranger at the G.L.E.E. because I’ve never bothered to change it. Also, shoutout to anyone from the StarKidPotter FB and EFST days if you’re reading this. AHHH IT’S CHRIS AND ERIC. Ok I might have to pause 20 thousand times during this Starship Ranger ad to acknowledge all the StarKid cameos. Tyler! “We come to conquer... in peace!” Tyler I love you. Brian and Richard! I forgot they painted Richard BLUE. Britney and Ariel! Nicholas Joseph Stauss-Matathia! I see that StarKid’s website has shortened his name to just Nicholas Strauss but remember the days when we’d purposefully say his full name? Anyway, I literally just screamed “NICK” when I saw him because he was always one of my faves. The Old Snatch was and still is iconic. Devin and Lily! The Wizard God himself, AJ Holmes. God... remember those AJ Holmes appreciation days where we’d make Chuck Norris-like memes about AJ? So much is rushing back from the depths of my mind oh my god... It’s been so long yet it feels like yesterday... “Someone really *static* F- *static* -ucked up big time” Love it.

2 minutes and 22 seconds in. I’ve written so much. I had to pause before Joey started singing to take a moment. I love this show so much. I love these goofballs so much. And they’re all so young. Most of them are younger than I am now. This is insane.

Ok I have to promise myself not to pause as much now. *Spoiler, I failed*

“I’ll fight off this gamma radiation if it’s the last thing I ever do!... We’re going down! This is the last thing I’ll ever do!” Oh my god. Look at baby Joey. He hasn’t even graduated from college yet. And that Bug puppet! Someone remind me to dig up the pictures of my crocheted plushies of Starship puppets since I made Roach and Bugette and gave them to the StarKids at SPACE and Apocalyptour. (I also did Rumbleroar, but the bugs were my own pattern I made so I was more proud) The camera is focused in on Bug instead of Joey’s face. I love it. So much. Brannnttttttt. My god. Am I gonna freak out over every single entrance? Roach pretending to die, he’s the best friend ever. “The needs of the many bugs outweigh the needs of the few bugs.” “Or the one bug, I know.” Oh man, when that line comes back... “Dirt eater” “Exoskeleton polisher” “I wanna build honeycombs” “The bug that ruins your picnic” “A fly on the wall!” That line came back to me earlier today and I died. Remembering that line was like 50% of the reason I listened to the soundtrack today.

Nick Lang! Julia! LAUREN LOPEZ. THERE SHE IS. Lovebugs, I can’t. *Sentimental music* “You could come over to my nest and I could... tear off your head and let my larva devour your body?” How did I forget that line? The way Lauren has to kick Bugette’s larva sack to walk. But the way that it also works so well with the character. I can’t. The Mosquito Brothers!! I forgot they show up so early. “This is our sister, Sweetheart” “...YO.” I CANNOT HANDLE JIM POVOLO. The “zzzz”s like buzzing as backing vocals instead of the usual “ahs” and “oohs.” The things you don’t appreciate until years later. Darren, you genius. That is such a good detail. For a second I couldn’t remember who the Overqueen is played by. 99% sure it’s Jim (It is). Also. Overqueen like ovary... and it looks like a giant vagina. That had to be pointed out to me later. “FLATTERY WILL GET YOU... everywhere.” Why did I forget that line too? “I’m a starship ranger” “Quiet you, you’re drunk” “No I’m drunk!” I remembered that line probably like... 2 minutes earlier when I noticed Joe huddling in the background and realized that line was coming up. The way Joey lets go of the puppet so both he and the puppet walk away with their arms limp... so cute.

Before even pressing play on part 3, I can hear February saying “Let the record show I am super ahead of schedule.” and I’m dying. I forgot about Brian as the escape pod. Denise Donovan! That Star Trek prop. I’m dumb so I can’t remember if it’s a communicator or what. But I know my Uhura Barbie had a mini one that I lost within a month probably. “OxyGen” “Schience” I can’t. “Mission Log... I think I just heard a spooky noise.” How am I forgetting all of these amazing lines? “Pika-pi!” AHHH I JUST SCREAMED. “My stars, I seemed to have landed in a field of these aMiNals!” I can’t. “Can I tell you guys something?” *port de bras and falls gently to the ground* “Hello!” “TOTORO!” I’m dead. The balloon mechanism on the mosquitos! I forgot about that! “HOLY SHIT IT’S A BUUUUGGGGG” Ok something I noticed but didn’t mention earlier. The bug puppet that Joe uses when he says “I had my heart set on nourishment” is the same one red and pink one that Julia used when talking about wanting to be nourishment. When Julia actually gets eaten, she’s using a different bug puppet, the green and pink one, but the same character voice. So, I can’t tell if they intentionally had her play 2 bugs so Joe could be one of them later, or if it was a mistake. I might also just be overthinking things. “ME THINKS IT WENT THAT-A-WAY” I cannot handle Jim Povolo. That scream Joe does as he slimes her. Woah I originally wrote “There seems to be no signs of intelligent lifeforms anywhere” earlier and then deleted it since I don’t know why I found it remarkable. And then looking at the comments of this part I see someone mentioned a Toy Story reference. So that’s why that line stuck out to me. Aww StarKid. There are so many Disney references in this show.

THERE SHE IS. THERE’S MY GIRL TAZ. The pew pew effects how could I forget that!  “Hey Taz. You’re pretty tough for a chick.” “I was just going to say the same thing about you.” “Woahhhhhhhh” JoMo oh my god. “My spectrometer readings are off the wazooooooo” That line kills me. Why am I JUST NOW noticing, 10 years later, that Tootsie enters this scene with his gun facing the wrong way. Oh my god. “I saw the empirical proof that science killed god. It’s comforting to know he was once alive though. I like to think that when he died, he went to heaven.” Oh Tootsie Noodles. “...What the hell kind of name is that?” “He’s got bear hands??” Why do I forget all of these lines??!? That record scratch and freeze frame to go “BOOOOOO” oh my god I forgot that. “Like the other day, he was in the cafeteria, just cah-rying in front of everybody.” BOOOOOOO. Here we go, Taz’s amazing Up monologue. “And when Up, cuts an onion, the ONION is the one who cry.” HELP. Also 99% sure I used that joke for AJ appreciation at least one year. “Now take a walk off my knife” What a line. So awesome. I remember having a profile pic on FB that was the text of that monologue and the image of Lauren screaming “WALK IT OFF” I’m still convinced that first “WOO” from the audience that we hear when Up enters is Darren. “I do not peepee sitting down” “Huh??” JoMo’s face as if he’s trying his hardest not to laugh and I can’t tell if that’s him breaking character or if Krayonder is actually trying not to laugh. “I peepee like big boy, deadgoddamnit. So stop making fun of me because it hurts my feelings” I’m dying. Also, deadgoddamnit is amazing. “if you don’t go out there and die for something, then I will kill you for nothing.” I remembered the mirror scene, just seconds before it started and already started laughing. “You’re not a failure, overall.” “Allow me to introduce you to the final member of your team. MegaGirl!” I forgot how DRAMATIC that was. I also forgot that’s how MegaGirl comes into the story.

I need to stop pausing every 5 seconds oh my god I’ll never finish this tonight if I don’t.

“All hail AstroBoy” That was the funniest line. “MegaGirl, can you kill humans?” “No. But I’d like to.” I can’t handle it. “A horse ate my cousin! Me and horses got a feud.” #1 MegaGirl doing the “I’m watching you” hand sign. I can’t. “Hey. Miráme. *Slaps* NOW ESCHUCHAME” amazing. “Or that time. You taught me calculus... CALCULUS WAS TOUGH.” I never went past pre-calc. Nope. Ah. Get Back Up. One of my fave songs. “And now we dance.” Dylan’s “OW” as they lean back. “Ok Idiotas. Say something nice. Or I will kill you.” It’s all so iconic.

“So you still think being an egg planter is lame?” “...Yes.”  The larva oh my god. I forgot we see one before the end. That’s Jaime playing the larva I think. Life is definitely one of my all-time favorite StarKid songs to this day. I wish it was longer. I love it so much. And I love that its instrumental is scattered as a motif throughout the show. “It’s a short, small thing we lead. With so much potential, pointless or essential, which one can I be?” Wow. Near Pippin levels of giving me an existential crisis. Also wow Joey improved his singing so much between AVPS and Starship. “My name’s Bug” “*Gasp!* Like a bug??” “Uh... no.” “Good. I’m February, like the month, but a person.” I should start saying that honestly. “I’m Hope, like the concept, but a person.” “You boldly go where every man -hey- woman -bark woof- or data dog has ever gone before! Sorry K9DX” Adorable. Joey’s subtle little double nod he makes the Bug puppet do when he’s shocked she thinks he’s a Starship Ranger. Amazing. Ah he said goddamn not deadgoddamn! February should have known right then he wasn’t human! “Take my claw” that too. "The only thing that needs to rest are your jokes, because they are so tired.” “Woahhhhhh” No but like... why don’t I use that line in everyday life... “Now I am slightly less weak.” “Ok. I’m going to shoot this metal bitch!” I’m dying. How did I forget the Taz/MegaGirl rivalry?? “That thing is a R-O-B-O-T man” “Can’t fool me with numbers, Krayonder.” I’m dead. “The stack of hay was my cousin!” #2 The way Meredith says “barometric pressure” is great. And Tootsie saying “Well you must take real good care of it, because I never would have guessed.” He’s such a sweetheart. “Nobody shoot dammit, nobody shoot.” “KILL KILL KILL” I never really liked Hideous Creatures but it’s so cute to see MegaGirl do the choreo robotically. I love that the Gap hasn’t changed. “Cool it skank, you do not know me.” Another line that I forgot until a split second before it was said. I’m so glad whoever edited this added some pews going in the wrong way for Tootsie’s gun. I know I definitely noticed Tootsie’s gun was backwards during this part, but I don’t know if I noticed it was backwards in that very first scene too. I forgot about MegaGirl tossing out Specs. That “MEGAGIRL!!!” scream from Joe though.

“Never in my 6 long days of life.” Underappreciated joke. Also, I think this is the 4th unique upright bug puppet. We got red/pink, green/blue, green/pink, and now red/blue. Also, Nick Lang is a great puppeteer. “Yes, I helped her escape. But I swear, never in a million years, did I think I’d be caught and yelled at for it!”  Oh I forgot Bugette is the witness. Jaime’s angry face behind Joey is killing me. “He didn’t know the humans were evil.” “Oh, they’re not.” “Shut up!” Humoons and hoomans. “And no more singing or dancing” *gasps of horror* “The Overqueen has overspoken.” “Well, that’s not gonna help your chances with Bugette” Oh Roach. “PERHAPS.” Jim destroys me.

God the 4-person Pincer puppet. Amazing. Dylan’s arms being strong enough to be above his head for 10 minutes straight. Amazing. Also, Nick Lang is so emotive as a claw. It took me a sec but yeah JoMo is the tail. “There were? Where are they?” Joey’s face. “Tell me all about her” The claws under the chin I can’t. Hey StarKid, I see you throwing in an ad mid-video before Kick It Up a Notch. You’re lucky I love and support you guys. “Put ‘em together and what have you got?” bibbity boppity boo. More Disney references! This scene is full of them. Man, remember when we were all blown away by Dylan’s voice in this song the first time? Like we could tell he could sing in AVPM/S, but his songs were just so jokey and only his long “Welcooooooooooome” showed us his talent. But then Kick It Up a Notch happened. And we FINALLY appreciated Dylan’s beautiful voice. “I pushed it to the limit.” and “To coin a phrase, be a man.” more Disney. I might be overthinking this and will have to rewatch Life to confirm, but I think the camera zooming out as Pincer reprises Life is just like the camerawork when Bug sang it originally. If so, then wow even when filming their shows StarKid really thinks it all through. (Update: It totally is referencing the original zooms for Life and that’s amazing. Except it’s zooming out instead of in. I LOVE the attention to detail even in filming the show. I’m gonna guess that’s Liam’s doing.) All I can see when I hear Bug’s chorus of this song is Jaime and her SPACE tour dancing, which they incorporated in Apocalyptour as actual choreography. Because they’re goofballs. The kick line. Love it. God. Even though it’s not my favorite song from Starship (just because I love Life and Beauty more), Kick It Up A Notch is one of the best StarKid has ever done. I really has everything. Dylan’s gorgeous voice. Not one but two reprises of earlier songs to throw Bug’s own words back at him. Jim’s bass line. Awesome puppets. Disney references. It’s so amazing. I love how all the comments are either about Dylan’s voice or Dylan’s ability to hold his arms up for a 10+ minute scene or both.

"Gameover man, gameover!” “I feel like cutting open your belly, and filling it with jelly” *Gasps* Oh my god, I put on the captions for a second, and  the caption said *Sad spayed puppy noises* “I am in charge of this mission now.” How did I forget about the mustache until 2 seconds before it happened? “She’s got the mustache now. *Kisses head* I love you” Oh my god Tootsie. I FORGOT ABOUT THE SECOND STACHE. There’s an ad right when we see Bug’s human form and I can’t even care because look at him! Ahhh. And the blue headband! Ahhhhh. Joey you’re so adorableeeee. “Bug? Well that’s a fine name.” His concerned face then the relief. Adorable. “Thank you sir. I am a tough bitch.” “Getting nothing but bug muff?!?” I love the slight delay the audience has before laughing as they realize what was just said. “Bug. You hard, ese. You flame.” I die. “Up there. In Space!” *dramatic pointing* No I totally didn’t just do the dramatic pointing with them... no that’s not in my muscle memory from 10 years ago... why would you think that. I’ll rave about Status Quo after it’s done. “But, what if I miss you?” Awwwwwwwww. And that “Just look up.” screenshot was used for “This.” memes in the fandom for years.

Oh Joey. Status Quo is such a good song too. And he really did improve as a singer to sing it. Earlier this week I remembered that this week is also the 10th anniversary of that time Darren was hopping from city to city every single day to promote the Warblers album. And at one point in that week he did a livestream that I remember rushing home to watch. In that livestream, I am 99% sure he sang Status Quo as a little sneak preview for Starship being released later that week. (Just checked, yep he sang it in a livestream on April 20 2011) God I love this song. Then the version the boys all sang for SPACE Tour was beyond beautiful too. Ahhh I love this musical.

Ok. It’s almost midnight. I started this 3 hours ago. I’m probably not finishing the show until 2am at the rate that I’m pausing and stopping to comment. But OH WELL.

“Dr. Spaceclaw” wow. “Leaving them behind was of little consequence, but a pleasure.” Oh Megagirl. “You did a very good job today too, son.” “*Gasp* Thanks dad.” That Star Wars fake-out though. Speaking of Star Wars, I really need to rewatch Ani now that I’m actively a Star Wars fan unlike last time when I still wasn’t invested in the movies I just watched them. How did I forget about Jaime playing Junior’s new mom?? ...Does Junior get an alien incubating in his chest... is that foreshadowing... I can’t remember. (This was like... half a foreshadow) This scene is funnier now that Breredith is married. The way Junior says “Phew” I’m dead. I remembered how they restrain MegaGirl once again 2 seconds before it happened oh my god. “We deserve bubbles on our skin.” An iconic line. “Well thank the long dead god you made it, Bug!”  The crunching of the handshake, I can’t. Oh someone in the comments pointed out that Bug and February are doing the Tarzan hand thing while Up’s asking Taz to see a movie. Adorable.

Get yourself a man like Tootsie who won’t stand for you talking down about yourself. “Maybe this was all part of God’s plan. He made before he died.” I love the dead god jokes. I remember years ago some kid on facebook was like “The dead god jokes are offensive” and I was like “It’s a sci-fi musical about a bug in a human body but sure worry about god being dead.” but probably in an even more immature answer. I’m just mesmerized by Tootsie and MegaGirl’s verses. God. The first Dylan and Meredith duet. Amazing. And MegaGirl’s confused face is great. “Don’t press that button, or we’ll all be sucked into space.” So... Can anyone tell me what foreshadowing is? Oh shoot... ok wait no I’ll comment on that when we get there. God that is such a cute love song. I wrote barely anything just because I love that song so much. Would love to know where Tootsie’s taking her though.

Oh my god this scene! I forgot about this. How could I forget this. “Well the world always looks a little bit brighter, from on top of a lap.” I had remembered Bug sitting on Up’s lap, but not Specs. This is the part I forgot. Adorable. Ahhhh so cute. The Specs/Krayonder relationship was apparently cut from the filmed version, but was present if you saw it live. These moments are adorable. And I love how this is the second person JoMo’s had to carry in this show since he also carried Denise earlier. “Why if it isn’t Bug, my oldest friend.” and “Don’t say that, my dear.” are adorable. Oh wait. Up sat on Bug’s lap. Not the other way around. Ok. I didn’t remember this scene as well as I thought I did. I’m dying. I didn’t want to write anything during this, but oh my god “That son of a bitch Optimus Prime” I forgot that. I love the audience’s reaction to “The entire right side of my body, it’s a robot” because they all gasp, and then laugh at themselves for gasping. I knew there was something he couldn’t do without crying. I didn’t remember it being “Sir I Wanna Buy These Shoes” Christmas Song. It’s ok Up, I haven’t listened to that song in full in years. I can’t handle it. But Christmas songs in general make me cry too. Oh Up said goddamn instead of deadgoddamn too. Hmm... Aww the mother spider story. “I think the old you was just killing out of hate.” “Oh I was.” I’m dying. Awwww the nose kiss. I definitely remembered that. “Deadgodspeed soldier!” The way Joey misses catching the keys and also Darren’s “Woo!” in the audience again. So great. That 12 minute scene is just adorable and the Up story is so dramatic and hilarious.

Hmm finishing before 2am might be ambitious... “Hahaha. Then I’ll shoot him!” “Taking care of my business down on the planet is that cool with you?” Brian’s delivery of that line has always intrigued me. “How much I care about my MegaGirl unit’s survival is also a percent equivalent to zero” Rude. “You are nothing like my boyfriend, Tootsie Noodles.” “Yes, well - wait WHAAA” This scene is so different now that they’re married. “Ha. Ha. It was cute.” “You’re... a toaster.” *Slaps* Ok 1) I used to use that insult all the time and only half ironically. I was a strange teenager. 2) She just hurt a human... isn’t that against programming, or can she just not kill humans? Evil angry Brolden is something we need more of. I love Brian as a villain. More please. “You stupid goddamn robot” So I guess they say goddamn and deadgoddamnit. I’m overthinking the evolution of language in this universe. Also Brian’s screams while being choked are amazing. I’ve never forgotten those, if anything they’re better now.

AHHHH I REFRESHED AND DELETED ALL OF MY STUFF FOR BEAUTY. Kill me. I’m so mad. Let me try to recreate it but I hate myself. I was saving this draft after every part but OF COURSE I don’t save after my favorite song and then refresh.

Oh poor Meredith. Her white wig doesn’t let her blend in as much when she’s in the hoodies playing a bug. “Oh hey Bugette, we’re just trying to get Bug laid!” That bug had to know about Bugette’s crush though? That’s just cruel. “The ending is killer” ruuuuuuddddddddddeee. I know I had at least one more point, but that’s lost to the ether. Beauty is probably my fave, if not tied with Life. When I was listening to it earlier, I was overcome with emotion because it’s just such a joyful song. These days I cry over happy stuff almost as much as I cry over the sad. And these lines just hit so hard... I love it. I love this song so much and this scene so much. “Bug. She excreted her filth for you. WE DID IT!!!!!!!!” Brant Cox is so good. It really is a shame he’s not in anything else besides AVPSY and the 10th Anniversary with everyone else. “I do accept you for who you really are. A genius.” Well February, you’ll be glad to know that you thought of that, so you’re the genius. Wow. Junior’s 25, Brian was 25, and now I’m 25. This really was perfect timing for the 10th anniversary. Also I do not feel 25. “Suck off!” amazing.

I’M SAVING THIS TIME.

Ok next part. Luckily I was only 1 minute into the next part when I refreshed. Still so mad at myself... “Someone really firetrucked up big time” (Dead)God I love that line. I also used firetruck unironically. Once again, I was a strange teenager and I didn’t like cursing and I still don’t. “This is so weird, I’m so used to the scrambly version.” (It was while writing this line the first time that I refreshed and lost Beauty....) Ok as I watch AJ, it’s hitting me that he almost definitely came to the set during rehearsals and filmed his part since it’s not a green screen like the rest of them. “The hunters have become the hunted, and it’s wabbit season.” “That was a good video, until the end when it got sad.” Thanks Bug. “I think, I just had a think” See February’s smart. “I’m in a weird situation” Love that line. “Bug is a BUG!? I DON’T BELIEVE IT” Oh Junior. Dylan’s insulted face at “I am not... a dumbass.”  So I can’t tell if Brian forgets he’s trapped when he moves his arms into a more relaxed position to lean on the column and then puts them back, or if it’s purposefully staged that way. Brian’s acting while he pretends to be shy and embarrassed about his evil plan is amazing and adorable. Brian has a good evil laugh, why don’t we get him as a villain more often? Also I was gonna make some sort of joke about Nick as Pincer’s left claw vs. Robert as Snarl’s left paw, but I’ll leave it be.

I FORGOT ABOUT THAT WEIGHT TAZ WAS LIFTING JUST FLOATING UP TO THE SKY WHEN SHE LETS GO. I just laughed out loud. “Damn that G.L.E.E. They’re always making twisted abominations of everything!!” I cannot handle it. And the wink. Poor Darren but also not poor Darren at all. I was just now WRACKING my mind for who could possibly be playing Pincer’s tail if JoMo was being devoured by mosquitos. It’s Brant. Literally the entire cast is currently onstage. Ok Krayonder’s been getting his blood drained for 3 minutes, why is he alive? OH I FORGOT KRAYONDER GETS UP AND SHOOTS THE BUGS. Ok and he gets chopped by Pincer’s claws too so HOW does he survive? StarKid answer!!! I forgot how dramatic this musical gets when you got both the bugs and MegaGirl coming after the humans. Aww the Vulcan salute from Specs. “I changed my name. To Tootsie... MegaGirl.” I love the reactions of the people in the audience who immediately realize what that means. I hear at least one “oh my god” that sounds like sobbing. Awwwww Tootsie’s “that’s real” speech and “I’d love you if you was the horse that ate my cousin.” (#3) just... get yourself a man like Tootsie MegaGirl. He is perfection. God the downloading love scene is so cute. I can’t handle it.

The Up saving Taz scene is so dramatic. Then Brian and Jim just calmly walk offstage. It kills me. Also why did Jaime just continue to lie there? “I just needed to learn how to kill with my heart.” Not exactly what Bug meant, but it works. God Taz climbing onto Up’s back is still the most hilarious thing ever. Whoever thought of her climbing that way was a genius. So funny. I always wanted to try it. Holding the gun up to her head like a blowdryer always gave me anxiety. Making the door out of a scrim that can be backlit was genius. Oof and bringing back “The needs of the many bugs outweigh the needs of the few bugs. Or the one bug.” just hurts. Poor Bug. My heart. This is probably the line that sticks with me to this day and I do think about sometimes.

Ok it’s now 2am and I still have 2 more parts.

I sorta love that Joey didn’t have the time to change into his blacks so he’s still in the Starship Ranger suit while playing the Bug puppet. “Save the Overqueen. I love her.” Awww. “Roach, I’m gonna get the job done if it’s the second last thing I do.” Love it. That Kick It Up A Notch Reprise though. Brian, you should play villains more often. Also remember all of us being like “LUPIN CAN SING?!?!?!??!!” “Lucky for me, God is dead. When you see him in hell, tell him Junior sent you.” Deadgod I love that line. This whole deadgod thing was just leading up to that amazing line. Oh no Bugette! Bug saying “maestro” oh my god. “DFSDSJFDSJKFDS... I’m dead.” I forgot that part! Oh my god the way Brian flicks the glasses back down on his face. Ok so I saw Lauren wiggle her way behind the mucus sac, but I didn’t see Nick come onstage. I rewinded, and I guess the zoom in shots on Brian and Joey were timed so we can’t see Nick join Lauren to be the first larva to come out. Oh well. And I love the crowd cheering as Junior dies. “And bingo was his name-o” That callback though. I forgot that the Overqueen eats Bugette’s body while crying. “Or Bugette! Oh...” Also god Roach is adorable.

Last part. 2:21am. Here we go. Krayonder got his blood sucked out by giant mosquitos and was cut up by a giant scorpion, but all he needs is a bandage around his head. Awwww the soft “I Wanna Be” playing the background as Bug begs the team to accept his bug form. Bug being so mad “It’s that bastard Pincer isn’t it?” and then being so happy that Joey does the little nose scrunch thing. So cute. JOEY’S FACE WHEN DENISE KISSES THE BUG PUPPET. Cannot believe I forgot that until 2 seconds before it happened too. “I now pronounce you man vs. machine. Fight!” WOAH. Why in the WORLD did “eep op ork ahah” come back to me. I was able to say it WITH Joey. That was straight from the DEPTHS of my teenage brain oh my god. I forgot about that oh my GOD. THAT’S INSANE. I FORGOT SO MUCH STUFF BUT I REMEMBERED HOW TO SAY “I LOVE YOU” IN BUG.

And the Beauty reprise.

God I love this musical. It’s still my fave StarKid show I think. And I’m horrified to see that it has only 500K views for the last part, so only 500K people have watched it all the way through after 10 years. That’s disgraceful. It’s amazing. Watch Starship.

It is 2:32am. I started at 8:50pm. Got sidetracked when I had to rewatch the Beauty part of Act 2 again to make sure I got my notes back in the post. Took a few bathroom breaks. But this is mostly because I paused every like 10 seconds to make a comment, so it took 5 and a half hours to watch a 3 hour musical. This why I take forever to watch things while liveblogging. I take too long to writing notes.

I’ll probably just post this in the morning. Gotta proofread for mistakes before posting.

Ok it’s the next afternoon. This post is literally 5,000+ words and takes 20 minutes to read according to a online word counter. I’m sorry to whoever read this entire thing. Your reward is the pictures of the Starship plushies I crocheted when I was 15 and 16.

(Ignore the bad lighting and my horribly chipped paint. That’s the only picture I have of the Bugette one since I gave it to Lauren Lopez a day later. I started making another for myself shortly after but never finished. Maybe I should finally finish the second one... hmm...)

[elizadunc]

Marry Me, Because I Want to Date You

There’s a moan and then an expected “Oh my gods, marry me, Bluebell.” 

They’re cookies, and she got them from the store. 

But still, he proposes.

As he’s been doing for the last 8 years. 

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It had started in college, they had been assigned as partners in a required chemistry class and had quickly gone from hating each other, to becoming begrudging allies in the face of Dr. Tarly’s archaic ideas of teaching, to being best friends, over the course of about 3 months. 

The proposals were harmless at first, it had started as a joke, or at least, she had assumed it was a joke.

They had been up late studying and she had gone on a coffee run. She’d learned his coffee order by this point and, though she preferred tea, it wasn’t like remembering a coffee order was difficult. 

But he’d taken a sip and looked at her as if she was the Maiden in the flesh.

And then he’d done it. He’d said it. 

“Marry me, Bluebell.” 

She’d snorted and rolled her eyes, doing her best to hide her response to his dumb nickname that always made her feel like the ice cream more than the flower that he claimed was the inspiration. 

She’d allow herself to take out the whole interaction and turn it over in her mind later when she wasn’t being faced with the full force of her best friend.

He’d smirked at her predictable reaction and they’d both gone back to studying as if nothing at all had happened. Well, Brienne supposed, nothing actually had happened. 

It was only later that night in her dorm room that she’d sat on her bed and screamed a bit into her pillow about the fact that she’d actually heard the words “Marry me” directed at her. 

Not seriously of course. 

Brienne was well aware of what she looked like and what Jaime looked like. She was under no ridiculous notions that anything would ever happen between her and her best friend. So she had taken it as a joke and moved on. 

But then he’d done it again a few weeks later at the student union when she bought him a sandwich after he’d realized he left his wallet in his dorm room. 

And again when they were at the climbing wall in the student rec center and he’d forgotten his climbing shoes so she’d loaned him an extra pair that she had in her locker. They were purple. He looked hilarious. But still he said in that ridiculously serious voice, “Marry me, Bluebell”. 

Jaime had continued to “conveniently” forget his wallet, and so Brienne had continued to buy him coffee, or lunch, or any number of things that meant he would ask his dumb question. 

It continued like that for years. 

They'd graduated and moved to King’s Landing and started careers that kept them busy, day in and day out, and still he would propose. 

It had to have been the longest running joke in the history of forever. But Jaime liked it, and who was Brienne to deny him.

He’d shown up to her apartment once with a six pack and a movie and then asked her after she’d ordered the pizza, as if it were some big thing for her to pay 15 dragons for a large pizza with pepperoni and bell peppers. 

And again after she’d bought him yet another coffee and gotten his new, ridiculously complicated, order right the first time. An order that was much, much, more ridiculous than the simple black coffee with two creams and four sugars that had been his go to during college. That time he’d written the question on the napkin. He'd doodled a little flower next to his dumb nickname for her. A doodle that to her managed to look like a cross between a sad dog and a really weird looking dandelion. It had spikes.

She’d drawn mean looking eyes on it in response. Jaime had burst out laughing, and, after a moment, Brienne couldn’t help but join in. They’d laughed for what seemed like hours. They’d gotten stares. 

They had started to get settled into their jobs and their lives, they’d added some friends to the group and Brienne contented herself with a life full of friendship. Contented herself to a life without romance. 

Then she’d met Hyle Hunt. 

He was everything she’d expected to deserve in life. Almost nondescript looking, brown hair and brown eyes, and entirely forgettable. 

But he’d liked her. He’d brought her flowers and took her out to dinner and didn’t mention her height all that much. 

He had managed to be both sweet and a bit patronizing and while she wouldn’t have taken it from anyone else, she felt that if someone was actually showing an interest in her she should at least try to show an interest back. 

And it was fine. 

Jaime had hated him, but Jaime was a prickly person to people who weren’t in his immediate friend group. 

But they'd been fine. Hyle was fine.

He’d tried, toward the beginning, to call her Bluebell and she found that there was no way in any of the hells that she would ever allow anyone but Jaime to call her that dumb nickname. 

Hyle had been offended at first, but then had taken to calling her all sorts of different names that hinged on the word blue. 

She really hadn’t wanted to hurt his feelings, and she’d already felt like she was pushing it with not allowing him to call her Bluebell. So she allowed it. 

Hyle was always doing that, finding ways to inch into her life in all of the spaces where Jaime normally fit. And it wasn’t always a seamless transition. 

She and Jaime loved watching documentaries about the age of heroes. Hyle found them mind-numbingly boring and never failed to let her know during the few times she picked one for their now weekly movie nights. 

Jaime loved trying new and weird dishes from different parts of the world and would regularly order from the most obscure hole in the wall restaurant he could find. Hyle hated anything that wasn’t from Westeros and refused to eat something that had more than one pepper of spice in it. 

Jaime and Brienne worked out on a regular basis and were matched fairly evenly, Hyle had gone once or twice to the gym and ended up complaining both times that they didn’t include him in their workout. Mostly because if they’d tried he would have collapsed into a heap on the ground.

He’d claimed that he was trying to be a good boyfriend. That generally boy/girl best friends weren’t as close as Jaime and Brienne were and Jaime was obviously trying to steal Brienne away. 

Brienne usually rolled her eyes at that and did her best to reassure Hyle that if Jaime was interested in her he would have said something some time in the last 8 years. 

But then Hyle found out about the proposals.. 

He’d been at her apartment for dinner and had found one of the millions of times that Jaime had proposed by writing it on a random piece of scratch paper on her desk. 

That particular time had been after he’d had a particularly trying work-day and she’d bought him Pentoshi take out even though it wasn’t her favorite. 

They’d been lying on the couch watching a dumb movie and he’d hopped up suddenly and run over to her desk to grab the first piece of paper he could find. Then he’d dropped it in her lap and settled back down to watch the rest of the movie. 

It was dumb, a random moment among millions of other random moments that all surrounded the ridiculousness that was her best friend’s insistence on proposing at every chance he could. 

But Hyle had been upset. 

Well, upset was putting it mildly. 

He’d stormed over to where she was just starting to brown the meat for the tacos they were having and thrust the random piece of scratch paper under her nose as if presenting the final piece of damning evidence in a courtroom. 

“Did you know about this?” his voice was not calm. 

“Of course I knew about it, it’s a joke. Jaime does it all the…” Brienne trailed off, realizing too late that this was probably one of those times where lies of omission were permissible. 

But the damage was done. 

“He does this all the time?” Hyle’s face was turning red. It wasn’t pretty. 

“Yes, but he doesn’t mean anything by it! He’s done it since we were in college!” 

“Right, well that’s going to stop right now. I will not have another man proposing to my girlfriend.” 

“I’m sorry?” she said this incredulously but Hyle, in his fashion, misinterpreted it. 

“You should be! This isn’t right! I’ve been trying to lessen his hold on you for months now, but if this is how it is then maybe you should stop hanging out with him altogether.” 

“No, sorry, no. I’m not going to stop hanging out with my best friend because for some reason you’re jealous of him. Jaime doesn’t see me like that.” The meat was going to burn if she didn’t stop stirring it, but this seemed like it was probably an important conversation that deserved her full attention. She turned the burner off. 

“Well it’s him or me, Brienne. I won’t date someone who gets a regular marriage proposal from her best friend.”

It was then that Jaime proved to either have the best or the worst timing imaginable. A key turned in the lock and Jaime entered already talking. 

“Hey Bluebell, I forgot to bring back your copy of ‘The Life and Times of Knights in the Age of Heroes’, oh hey Hyle.” He was holding the book in his left hand and two bags of Mereeneese take out in the crook of his right elbow. 

Hyle turned to Brienne, “He even has a key. Choose.” his face was a lovely shade of puce at this point, and he was glaring at Jaime and Brienne alternately. 

“Him, of course I choose him. I’m sorry, Hyle.” 

Hyle had immediately stormed out leaving Jaime looking bewildered and Brienne feeling, well, rather relieved actually. 

Jaime had wanted to know the details but after that all she really wanted to do was watch a documentary and eat food that wasn’t from the three places Hyle deemed ‘acceptable’. 

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Yes, Jaime. Alright, I’ll marry you.” 

It’s been two weeks since Hyle walked out and Brienne is done with saying no or rolling her eyes. She wants to see what will happen if she says yes. 

Jaime looks at her for a second, blinks twice, and then shoots to his feet and cups her cheek. 

“You’re not just saying that. You never say yes.” 

“Jaime my boyfriend gave me an ultimatum and I chose you, no I’m not just saying that, but are you actually asking? Were you serious all this time?” He rubs her nose with his and then nods. 

“Of course I was serious. I wouldn’t just ask. You laughed it off, and I understood, we were young, and for all that I had my dad’s money I hadn’t exactly bought a ring. But you kept saying no. So I figured I’d keep asking. And maybe one day you’d say yes. Because Bluebell I’ve been in love with you since chemistry.” 

It’s like all of Brienne’s hopes and dreams are coming true all at once and she doesn’t know how to feel. 

Jaime shuffles his feet, “any time you want to say something would be alright with me, Bluebell.” 

“I love you too, of course I love you too. I’ve been in love with you for years. I don’t remember not being in love with you. But I thought you were joking.” she gives in to the temptation to run her fingers through his hair and he leans into her hand.

“I know you did, but you were always going on about how you didn’t need a relationship. But then, then Hyle happened and I was so angry with myself for not asking you out first.” 

“I didn’t think you’d ever actually want me.” 

“Of course I want you, you’re my Bluebell. How could I want anyone but you?” 

“Okay, enough. Sap.” Jaime laughed at that before brushing his nose against hers again. 

“I need to kiss you now. I’ve been waiting for this for 8 years.” It somehow manages to be the best kiss Brienne has ever been a part of. Sweet, and intense, and laced with more meaning than any of the kisses that she had ever shared with Hyle. 

“I love you, I love you, I love you. Did you actually mean it when you said yes?” 

“Jaime we’ve never even dated. We can’t rush into getting married. This is too important.” 

“A long engagement, then. Just, wait here for a second.” He rushes out of the apartment and returns not even 5 minutes later with a small black box, and for a second Brienne can’t breathe. 

“Okay, okay, I’m going to ask you for real this time.” 

*fade to black*

[takingcourage]

Additions: Part 2

Pairing: Jaime x MC

Word Count: 3,700

Summary: During their first morning at home, the kids start settling in and Jaime and Arden get their first taste of parenting.  

Note: Based on my drafting and outlining, I anticipate that this series will be 6 full parts (give or take one) and a brief epilogue. I should be able to post at least an update a week from here on out -- hopefully more, if editing and polishing go smoothly. 

I also wanted to include a quick note about content. As the story progresses and you get to know more about the kids, you’ll see that they’ve experienced a fair share of difficulties. Although I ultimately want this series to be a hopeful and uplifting read, I also don’t want to be naive in the way I deal with their upbringing. If you have any concerns about the way I’ve portrayed any elements of this story, please tell me. I’d much rather correct my mistakes than make a further mess of things. 

Anyway, happy reading! 

June, 2027

Arden woke early, not quite believing that she’d actually slept through the night. As she consulted the phone on her nightstand, she felt Jaime stir at her side. When his imploring hand reached out to caress her hip, she flipped over to face him. 

“It isn’t even daylight,” he urged, voice thick from sleep. “We could go back to sleep.” 

She snuggled up to him, cool nose nuzzling his shoulder. “I don’t want them to get up before we do. And I forgot to ask last night if they like pancakes.” 

He chuckled and lowered his face to kiss her hairline. “They’ll be here next Saturday too.” 

Arden’s fingers teased the patch of hair on his chest, her voice growing quiet at the intimation. “But you know how important it is for us to be consistent. It’s their first full day here and I want to start things off right. Plus, it’s tradition.”

Jaime buried his face in her hair, his lips providing assurances before he ever gave voice to them. “We’ll start plenty of new traditions as a family of five. If they don’t like pancakes, we’ll find other routines to get into.” 

Wiggling even closer, she basked in the remnant of sleep warmth that lingered between their sheets. On any other day, she’d have been tempted to stay there until some outside force pulled them both from bed, but she was far too full of thoughts on this morning to lose herself in such amusements. 

“And I can almost guarantee that they’ll like pancakes.” 

She giggled into his ribs. “Probably so. All right, I’m getting up now.” With a slight groan, she pushed herself away and left the bed. Entering the bathroom, she heard the telltale rustle of blankets as her husband joined her. 

“It may be a little early to start on breakfast, but we can go drink some coffee while we wait for them to get up,” he suggested, bypassing her at the double-wide vanity. 

“It’s never too early for coffee.” 

Jaime shook his head and stepped into the shower with a grin. “I’m enabling your addiction, aren’t I?”

She cocked a brow, but didn’t dignify the comment with further response. Instead, Arden made her way to the dresser and set about choosing an outfit for the morning. The options were still sitting at the foot of their bed when Jaime emerged from the shower, hair dripping onto her bare skin as he leaned over her to take a look. 

“I didn’t figure this part out before,” she admitted, rotating her face so she could see him. “Do I put on lounge pants or real clothes? I want them to know that we’re down-to-earth, but I don’t want to look like a slob. We’re supposed to “model good choices” and all of that.” 

He hugged her tightly, and though she squirmed automatically against the loose droplets of water that transferred to her skin, it didn’t take long for her to relax into his continued touch.

“You’ll be modeling good choices no matter what, babe. Before you know it, you’ll be back to work and long gone by this time most mornings. Besides, I think our Saturdays now are for lounging around and enjoying family time.” 

“Okay.” 

Arden took the advice gratefully, slipping her jeans back onto the shelf in her closet. She pulled on the drawstring sweatpants she’d selected, subconsciously checking to make sure they hadn’t gotten too wrinkly in the days they’d spent sitting in her drawer. 

“Ready?” came his quiet question minutes later. 

“Can I have a kiss first?”

He gave in, and the easy motion bolstered her strength. “We’ve got this, Arden.”

The relative darkness of the house meant that they had to navigate by memory. As they crept down the stairs, Arden had to suppress the feeling that they were some strange variety of burglar -- tiptoeing and avoiding all excess noise in their own home. On reaching the kitchen, Jaime flipped on a single light and withdrew the bag of grounds from the cupboard.

No sooner had Arden turned on the sink to fill the pot than footsteps creaked on the stairs. Their daughter appeared in the kitchen doorway moments later.

“Morning, Sophia.” Jaime gave her a welcoming smile as he folded back the top of the package of coffee. 

“Good morning,” Arden echoed, briefly taking in the girl’s appearance.

“Good morning,” came the tentative response. One hand raised to brush the neatly-parted hair behind her ear. The other slipped into the pocket of her jeans. 

Why am I so awkward? Just say “good morning” back like a normal person. 

The errant thought wrenched Arden’s heart, and she nearly dropped the pot of water balanced between her hands. Trying not to stare at the girl before her, she shifted it to the counter. She’d just decided to offer the child some coffee when Sophia spoke again.  

“Sorry,” she breathed, so cautiously that the words were almost a whimper. “I’m really bad at sleeping in new places and I woke up super early. I can go back to my room if that’s what you want.” 

Exchanging a quick glance with Jaime, Arden took a step toward the doorway. “Only if you want to. We weren’t sure what time you were used to eating breakfast, so we thought we’d come down and start with some coffee until you were all awake. Do you want some? We’d love to have you join us, even if you don’t want any.” 

In the months leading up to the placement, Arden had expected that interactions with their children would come as naturally her interactions with guests on the show – that all the right words would fall from her tongue at all of the right times. In the past eight years, she’d grown accustomed to the easy confidence she felt with her on-set persona. 

Her parent persona seemed incredibly stilted by contrast. Talking with her daughter was more like rehashing a script than anything genuine. She could practically feel herself checking off the familiar reminders. 

Be nurturing. When possible, let the child make decisions for herself. Include the child in normal family routines. 

Swallowing hard, she wondered how long it would take before she stopped second guessing her responses to everything. 

Sophia offered the shadow of a smile, tugging her hand from her pocket with no small degree of difficulty. “I like coffee.”

Arden’s brows scrunched. “Do you like it black?”

The girl couldn’t hide her impulse of disgust at the question, mouth souring at the thought of the bitter liquid. “Ugh, no.” Seeming to catch herself, she amended, “I can’t drink it like that.”

“Oh, good,” Arden sighed with relief. “Neither can I.” With renewed purpose, she opened the fridge and searched for the various bottles of creamer she knew resided on the shelves. Finding them, she ushered Sophia over for a look. “Do any of these sound good?”

Sophia squinted at the bottles she indicated, lifting her hand again to confirm that the hair was still tucked behind her ear. 

Arden gave her space, careful not to stare when it was so clear that she wasn’t ready to meet her eyes. 

But avoiding her face was hard. Those features had been seared on her memory for the better part of the past year. Seeing them before her now, she was struck by how notably they’d changed since September’s filming. The clear skin that she’d had in the initial video was now marked with a smattering of acne across her hairline, and her round cheeks had hollowed considerably over the course of the school year. 

She’s hardly a child at all, Arden realized with a sense of alarm. We’re going to have a teenager in the house in less than a year. I don’t think we’ve spent time around teenagers since we were teenagers. What have we done? There’s so much research I’ll have to do for–

As her thoughts began to spiral, Sophia’s voice dragged her out of the vortex. 

“Ca– May I try the hazelnut?”

Still trying to settle her mind, Arden retrieved the creamer she’d requested, along with the gallon of milk for herself. “If you don’t like it, you’re welcome to try any of the others.” She knew the response was delayed, but at least it felt better than not saying anything at all. “I like to switch things up now and then, so I usually have a few to choose from. Jaime doesn’t like anything in his at all,” she offered conspiratorially, placing the of bottles on the counter. “It’s gross, but he refuses to drink it any way other than black.” 

Jaime jumped in to defend himself, and soon the three of them were seated around the dining room table, mugs in hand. 

By the time the boys surfaced more than an hour later, they were just starting in on their second pot. 

“Ew, yuck,” Will announced on entering. “Coffee is dis-cuss-ting.” The word was drawn out, lisped over a pair of missing incisors. 

Alex elbowed him and traded a look with his sister. 

Jaime topped off Arden’s mug and passed her the sugar jar knowingly. “Well, we’ve got plenty of coffee if you happen to change your mind.” 

“I won’t,” Will promised, still rubbing his injured side. Taking a large step away from his brother, he found the empty seat at Sophia’s side. 

“How about you, Alex? Coffee?”

The boy’s tangled mop of hair shook vigorously. 

“All right. What about pancakes?” Jaime offered instead. 

I told you they’d want them, he told Arden when a round of nods circled the room.

“I can help make pancakes,” Sophia volunteered, pushing her empty coffee mug to the center of the table. 

“That’d be great,” Jaime agreed. “Do you like them with blueberries?”

Sophia looked at her brothers, discomfort evident in her puzzled expression. “I’m not sure. I don’t think we’ve had them like that before.” 

“I don’t like raisins,” Will chimed in. 

Arden’s face must have displayed her confusion at the younger boy’s admission. 

“We ate a lot of raisins with our last foster family,” Sophia offered by way of explanation. “He didn’t like them.”

Alex grumbled something under his breath. 

Sophia shot a warning gaze as she passed by his chair. “As long as they’re not raisin pancakes, we should be fine.” She stepped through the archway and stood attentively. 

“I’ll make some both ways, just so we’re safe.” Jaime retrieved a mixing bowl from the cabinet, then set about gathering dry ingredients. 

“You’re the one making them?” Their daughter’s voice cracked with the question. “I mean, I don’t mean that in a rude way. I just thought she was going to…” The girl’s wide eyes scanned the back he’d turned to her. He’s a nice guy. I’ll be okay. 

Arden felt like the wind had been knocked out of her as she watched the scene unfold. She knew a fair bit of Sophia’s history, and she’d picked up a handful of nonverbal cues when they’d visited the kids before, but no proof was as stark as what she was seeing and hearing this morning. 

A knot formed in the pit of her stomach. The thought of Jaime being anything other than trustworthy was ridiculous. Anyone who’d known him longer than thirty seconds could tell he was a man of impeccable character. Sophia was probably safer in the kitchen with him than she could be with any other person in the world. 

But she doesn’t know that, Arden reasoned. She’s been hurt before and trust takes a long time to build. 

Resolved, but somewhat deflated, she passed the threshold. 

Sophia visibly relaxed at her presence. 

“Do you want to get the eggs from the fridge?” Arden asked with a reassuring smile. “How many do we need, Jaime?”

“Today? Let’s start with three and see where that gets us. I haven’t made this many in a long time. It’ll take a while to cook them all,” he chattered on amiably. 

Arden caught Will’s restless squirming from the corner of her eye. “Do you boys want to go and play for a while or stay in here and wait with us?” The idea of keeping all three of them entertained between now and breakfast was a little daunting. 

“Can I take Opie for a walk?”

“Sure!” she replied instinctively. 

Panic flared across her consciousness as she realized her mistake. I can’t just leave Sophia alone with Jaime. And I’m not letting a seven-year-old go walking through the neighborhood by himself. 

Unless Alex wanted to stay and help too, splitting up was probably a terrible idea. 

Please volunteer to help, please volunteer to help. 

Alex continued staring at the grain of the table, fiddling with the collar of his pajama shirt.

Jaime met her eyes across the room. His quizzical brow quickly cleared in understanding. “Alex, would you mind helping too? I’ve got a perfect job for you.”  

It looked for a moment as though he was going to grumble at the request, but his face soon reset and he marched into the kitchen without complaint. Sophia’s calm demeanor assured her that they’d made the right decision. 

Thank you, she mouthed over the back of the boy’s head. Jaime smiled his response. 

Turning her attention to their youngest, she found him already petting the dog in the hallway. “I’ve got the leash here. Do you want to put it on?” 

Will’s bright eyes lit at the suggestion. 

Arden passed the cord over, watching closely as he clipped it onto Opie’s collar.  “He likes you,” she informed him with absolute certainty. “And he’s going to be so excited to have someone new to take him on walks.” 

The boy beamed at her, tongue visible in the spaces between his missing teeth.  She’d once thought that Jaime was the only person on earth whose smiles could stop her heart, but she recognized the distinct patter in her chest. For entirely different reasons, this child already had her wrapped around his finger. 

She was stirred from her musings by the sensation of a small face rubbing against her shin. Jinx strolled by, pausing momentarily to sniff the length of leash that dangled on the floor. 

“Can Jinx come for a walk too?”

Arden giggled, catching the cat’s derisive tail flicking even if she didn’t hear her thoughts. “I don’t think she’d like it very much. She really just wants to sleep and look out the window these days.” 

“Is she old?”

“She’s older than Opie is.” 

“Can we get a new cat for her to play with?”

“Maybe someday,” she answered noncommittally. Saying no to this boy was going to be an incredible test of willpower. 

With a quick wave toward the kitchen, they were ready to go. The morning had hardly started, and Arden already felt that at least one potential crisis had been averted. Repeating Jaime’s earlier affirmation, she followed Will out onto the lawn. 

We’ve got this. 

_____

July, 2027

Arden was’t sure when she’d been more relieved to pull into the garage and put her car in park. All she’d been able to think about since leaving was getting back to their kids, and the view of silhouettes through the front window had made her impatience all the more palpable. 

She practically flew through the adjoining door and into house. 

This was the first day that they’d needed her dad and stepmom to help fill in the gaps between schedules, and she’d be lying if she said that the arrangement had left her feeling easy. She had nothing against either one of them, but guilt had been gnawing constantly for the two hours she’d been gone. 

These were their kids. Their responsibility. Turning those duties over to others -- even family -- filled her with trepidation. 

“Mommy!” Will leapt from the couch before she’d even fully made it through the entryway. 

“Hey, guys!” she returned his enthusiasm, pulling him tight for a hug. His arms lingered at her waist a little longer than necessary, but she couldn’t help reveling in the affectionate show. Knowing that her desire to see him was reciprocated was extremely gratifying. When she glanced up, Alex’s eyes were on her.

Traitor. 

Her mouth ran dry at the older boy’s thought. It wasn’t the first time she’d been privy to hints that he was uncomfortable with Will’s quick attachment, but it was easily the most incriminating thing she’d overheard in the five weeks they’d spent together. 

“How’s your day been?” she asked Will, trying to push Alex’s response from her mind. 

“Good. Knock knock.”

“Oh, I love my welcome-home jokes.” With a cheesy grin, she set down her work satchel and gave the boy her full attention. “Okay, ready. Who’s there?”

Will’s features danced with excitement, the excess energy coming out as tiny shuffling steps across the hardwood floor. “Lettuce.” 

With a giggle, Arden complied. “Lettuce who?”

“Lettuce in, we’re cold out here!” Having recited the punchline, he gave a triumphant hop into the air.

She treated him to a breathy laugh, catching her father’s smile out of the corner of her eye. “That’s a good one.” Stretching out a calming hand to grasp his elbow, she asked, “Where’d you learn it?”

Will pointed to Harry, still seated on the couch with a pile of books on the cushion next to him. 

“He’s been reading them to me for the past hour,” Harry confirmed. “This one has a whole section in this one about vegetables.” His dubious look was reflected in his tone.  

“Oh yeah! There’s one about radishes! Can I tell it?”

Although she continued to engage with Will’s babbling, Arden’s eyes drifted to the other child in the room. Alex was still scribbling away in his sketchpad, the papers angled close to his chest so that no one could see the resulting artwork. 

What is it that’s going on in that head of yours? she wondered, feeling the faint furrow of her brow. But no answering thoughts met her question.

Bringing her conversation with Will to a close, she wandered into the dining room to find her daughter and stepmother engaged in one of Julie’s trademark pastimes. 

Jewelry making had always struck Arden as a remarkably fiddly way to fill one’s hours, but she couldn’t help admiring the strand Sophia was stringing together from the colorful array of seed beads strewn across the table in bags. 

She sat across from the table’s two occupants, eyes glazing at the repetitive motion of Sophia’s nimble fingers. “Those look amazing,” she said, considering the small assortment of bracelets and necklaces piled on the other side of the table. “Do you mind if I look?”

Sophia’s eyes met hers momentarily as she shrugged. “Go for it.” 

Arden looped a finger through a prominent chain and pulled the collection toward her. 

“Julie told me I could use her beads to make some back-to-school jewelry,” she explained, keeping a tight hold on the end of the wire as she searched for the next bead in sequence. “Do you want me to make something for you too?”

Arden’s breath hitched at the suggestion, and her response came slowly. “I would love that. You remember that dress you helped me pick out at the mall last week?” At the girl’s nod, she continued. “I’d been thinking about pairing it with a necklace that has some deeper greens…maybe some blue in there too? I’ll leave it up to you.”

With an approving smile, the other woman entered the conversation. “I’ve got lots of beads in those colors. If there aren’t any here that you like, I’ve got plenty more at home.”

“Thanks, Julie,” Arden expressed gratefully. “And thanks again for coming over this afternoon. You really helped us out.”

“We’re happy to do it anytime.” She selected a pair of pliers from the tools before her and cinched the clasp on her bracelet. “How was your interview?” she asked as she draped the piece over her wrist. 

Rolling a bead between her fingers, Arden considered the question. “I think it went well. We’ll have to match what this new group said against the rest of our records, but I we may have finally found the missing link.”

“It always sounds so much like you’re doing detective work.” 

“Sometimes it feels that way too,” she admitted with a half smile. “I just like to get to the bottom of a good story.” 

“You certainly have a knack for it.” Bracelet donned, she rose from the chair. “If you’ll excuse me for a moment.”

Seizing the opportunity, Arden shifted to the end of the table nearest her daughter. “Speaking of getting to the bottom of things, can I ask you something?”

Curious eyes glanced at her before returning to project between her hands. “What?”

“Alex seems like he’s in a weird mood today. Do you know if everything’s okay?”

Sophia reached for a new bag of beads, her forehead scrunching in contemplation. “He’s always like this at the end of summer. I think he’s just upset that he has to go back to school soon. He hates it.” 

“Do you think there’s anything we can do to make him feel better about it?”

“Eh, not really.” 

“Is there something specific about it that he hates?”

Raising her shoulders slightly, Sophia answered, “He hates homework and classes...kinda everything, really.” 

 “Okay.” Arden relaxed against the back of the chair. “We’ll see what we can do about homework and classes and...everything, then.” After a pause, she added her thanks. 

“Welcome.” Holding the strand to the light of the window, she took a better look at the work she’d done. Apparently satisfied, she placed another bead before sharing her thoughts further. “I don’t get it, but he really does hate everything to do with school.” 

Arden had seen comments to that effect in Alex’s case file, but hearing it from Sophia’s lips was still unsettling. Based on his behavior and the thought she’d overheard before, she was starting to have the sneaking suspicion that his agitation was being caused by something more than just school. 

She wasn’t going to stop investigating until she knew just what that something was. 

[sierrabinondo]

summer tour days 10 + 11, post-tour thoughts

wow it literally took me over a month to get this entry up, sorry haha. santino roasted me for this several weeks ago and it still took me this long. i’ve been chronically bummed out for what seems like a month now, so it was hard to muster up the will to write. period, actually. it’s been really hard for me to write music lately i literally have to push myself and i find no joy in the things i love anymore!

anyways, here’s the last 2-3 days of our tour! 

day 10 - philadelphia

sunlight peered in through the glass sliding door behind me as i woke up around 8:00 am in a living room with 8 other people, packed tightly across deflated sleeping bags and worn-in couches. i felt tired, but i was up already. i knew that if i didn’t get up and shower now, i was going to be waiting for five other people to shower before me. 

everyone took a few hours to get ready before we decided to head out to breakfast together, including jorge. we had a lovely lil family breakfast at this nice cafe about 10 minutes from jorge’s house. it was a small spot overlooking the valley that had an expansive coffee and espresso drink menu. i got a cappuccino that had some FUN art in it and a Very Disappointing Eggs Benedict. I was a dumbass and asked for the florentine benedict with lox added, instead of asking for the lox benedict with spinach added, which would have cost me significantly less hahaha. 

look at how small this bullshit is

sitting at a table with my bandmates and julie, we agreed that despite how long we had been on the road that we felt like we could keep going. i could tell everyone felt drained, but content. it’s like we all knew we were enjoying the last moments of freedom away from our boring lives back home and were cherishing each other’s company. 

after paying our checks we said our goodbyes to jorge and piled into the van. we had a much shorter drive due to staying in state college, but still hit some traffic approaching philly. not a surprise. it was also weird arriving philly from the west and not coming over the ben franklin bridge, haha. as we drove towards south street we admired the sight of the chinese lantern festival, which we sadly wouldn’t have time for. as opposed to missing DGD’s tour, i was sure i’d live vicariously through photos of it from my friend’s back home and didn’t feel too bad.

i completely forgot that south street is one of the busiest streets in philly and is mere minutes away from TLA. i realized i had been here before and felt my blood pressure rise realizing parking would be impossible. however, behind the venue we found a shoddy dirt parking lot. skeptical of whether or not this was a good idea, we approached the lot attendant and asked if it was okay to park, explaining that we needed a clear space behind us for opening the trunk to get gear out. the attendant obliged to our request, or so we thought.

i’m not gonna lie, i had NEVER heard of the tusk before we played there and it was actually a cool spot. the staff were cool and it was much more spacious than the pictures led me to believe. loading in up a couple flights of stairs was just the worst part. we played with our friends in copley woods which was great, and played with another philly local old city revival. another touring band also hopped on last minute. our set was purely okay??? we all agreed it wasn’t my best set but whatever i had fun and people still dug us so that was fine. jaime and santino had to be like lined up behind one another with their amps and then joe got one whole side to himself hahaha. 

photo credit: julie yi photography

i’m going a little out of order; i’m pretty positive this actually happened before our set. but out of nowhere i’m in the upper level of the venue by the stage and merch when julie texts the tour group chat BUGGING saying “HELP COME DOWNSTAIRS WE’RE GETTING KICKED OUT OF THE LOT”. so both bands run downstairs to scope out the situation, anticipating hell in the form of trying to find a new parking spot by south street in philly. what happened was, the lot attendant parked a vehicle behind ours, and when confronted about his promise that he made, he threatened to kick us out of the lot. however, jaime somehow magically de-escalated the situation somehow so the attendant agreed to move the car and everything was fine hahaha. 

the night was wonderful because santino’s dad came out and we hung out with some real cool people, the only downer was we had to stay later than anticipated because the promoter added that fifth band/touring band on the end, AND, the touring band were the only people who listened to the promoter and played a long set. yeah, the promoter wanted us all to play for 45 minutes but all of us were like, fuck that. but this band ACTUALLY had that much material so they played FOR AN HOUR. ALL of us stayed and we watched them, but we were so fucking tired and we just wanted to go home. we stayed because we understood the importance of supporting other bands, and these people were out here all the way from denver, colorado. but we were so done. and on this night we were staying at my house in brick so we were only an hour and forty five minutes away from a comfortable sleep. AND, my boyfriend was going to be coming over late too so i was just dying to get home. 

after loading out, a taco bell trip and a relatively short drive, we made it to my house around 1:00 am. and jeremiah still waited up and drove over for me uuugh :’)

day 11 - wallingford, ct

god, waking up to my boyfriend and fresh homemade breakfast by my parents was so, so good after being away for so long. it felt pretty strange to be home, and so briefly, but it was so good.  we sadly couldn’t stick around for long after eating breakfast, as we had our van drop-off scheduled for 1:00 PM before our last show of tour in connecticut.

we have shindle drive us up to jaime’s house for one last drive in the van. it’s always sad when you’re in the van for the last day and you know your grand adventure is soon coming to an end. it rained as we drove up parkway north and shindle weaved in and out of shitty new jersey traffic. i definitely did not miss the parkway while i was gone.

shindle wanted to run home quickly to shower and change at home (understandably), so not soon after we unload all of his belongings he takes off. it sucked so badly unloading the van in the rain but what could you do. we started plotting where we were going to get a bite to eat after jaime, julie and i dropped off the van. 

i look around at my bandmates and i go, “okay, who has the key?”

everyone stares blankly at each other.

joe goes, “uhhh, i think shindle gave it back to santino?”

santino looks back at us and goes “... i don’t have it.”

we tear apart our bags and turn our pockets inside out. search the interior of the van hoping it was left in the dash or on the floor by accident.

the drop off time for the van is 1:00 PM. it’s 12:15 PM. 

and we realize that, shindle still has the key. 

shindle’s phone died from the fifteen times i called him. he had left his phone on silent and didn’t look at it while he was driving back to little falls (who would). i had to call bandago and add another day to our rental. it sucked so badly. i was so frustrated that i started crying and jaime’s mom had to console me hahaha. i had to come to terms with the fact that there was literally nothing i could do. we weren’t going to get the key back until we saw shindle later. so i took a deep breath, put myself back together and we just left for the show anyways. 

photo credit: julie yi photography

we arrived to wallingford, CT around like, 5:30, maybe 5:50 PM. i felt my throat acting up again. in fact, it started to feel shitty a day prior but i was praying that i could still pull off a good set later that night. julie walked with me from the venue to get throat coat from CVS and hot water from mcdonalds. i couldn’t really go on voice rest; i had to just drink a lot of fluids, warm up as well as i could and hope for the best. cherry street is a small venue/dive kinda place, but i actually really liked it. anthony told me a lot of people have complained about the sound there but we actually had a really easy time. but there were two people doing sound, one was scotty the venue’s regular and then there was a guy named will who ran the board for our set. will was great. scotty was just really nice too haha. 

our friends migrant played the show as well as the band visitations. it was really great to see the guys in migrant again; we’ve been playing shows with them since 2016. we both played our first-ever studio at webster show together opening for sianvar before AEG shut all of webster down. because it was such a memorable night and they’re such a great band, we’ve kept in touch since then. visitations were also really awesome; i tried to watch as much as i could in between warm ups. i feel bad that i have to disappear to warm up while bands i’ve never gigged with before play, but i have to. 

well it turns out, it was pointless anyways!

yeah, wasn’t fond of the set i played at all. and the sound wasn’t bad either. it was just me. i was really upset. this was our chance to win over people in a state we could easily travel up to and play whenever, and it felt so embarrassing to be up on stage and watch these people hear me blow it haha. its like nails on a chalkboard for me when i hear my mistakes. even if i know what i’m doing sometimes i just blow it anyways. chris knew i was upset too because he just patted me on the shoulder as i slumped off stage like “it’s okay just go do your cool-downs” HAHAHA. but apparently i did something right because scott, *the* sound guy everyone knows at cherry street, bought me a shot LMAO. and some other people from CT chatted us up too, and they bought our merch (and also bought me more drinks). maybe we did do something right for these people to still approach us and have nice things to say. but i still felt like they were being way too nice to me. i still feel like people lie to me. all of the time. 

it was so awesome to watch destination dimension play to their hometown, as we were all surrounded by friends of theirs who were shouting the words to future cougar with us. it was so much fun to watch them play. and it was really nice of them to wear our t-shirts on stage haha. i didn’t wear mine but i bought the gray one which i loveee and is so comfy. we didn’t get to hang long after the show ended with them which sucked sooo badly because almost everyone had work the next day. i had the next day off but not everyone was so lucky. we loved touring with destination dimension so so much. it was nice to tour with a band in the same genre. we had such a happy time and we couldn’t wait for the next time we’d all get to see each other. 

photo credit: julie yi photography

it’s always so weird, the last day of tour. in the middle of tour, it feels like you’re living in this dreamscape where calendar days barely exist and your only job is to show up, play and then do it all over again the next day. that night, it felt like it all barely even happened. all of tour was already becoming a faint memory. i’d look back at photos and only barely remember what it was like to feel that joy again. and i dreaded how distant every adventure we shared together was about to become. 

epilogue

my alarm went off at 9:00 am. i hear sounds of jaime’s dad walking around the kitchen and in minutes time julie wakes up next to me. i lay there for a bit before texting jaime, “you up?” he comes downstairs, i throw my shoes on and my hair up in a ponytail and we go drop off the van. 

it feels like tour is over but i’m still with my friends so i feel okay. julie and i grab our belongings from jaime’s house, say goodbye and return for our drive home together. we talk about tour and how fast it flew by. i’m sort of in a rush to get home in time for E3, so julie is kind to oblige and we get her stuff out of my car expediently when we pull up to her house. 

i say goodbye to julie and joel, get back into my car and instantly feel my face muscles sink. the rest of the day just sucked. 

i’m driving myself home feeling sleepy and don’t even realize it. i run a stop sign and nearly get t-boned by some poor person who didn’t just spend 11 days on 4-5 hours of sleep. 

i finally arrive at jeremiah’s apartment in asbury and go to pick up the coffee i bought for my boyfriend, only to realize the ENTIRE cup spilled out everywhere all over the seat. 

jeremiah meets me downstairs to help me bring my bags up. there’s just so, so much shit. a heavy bag of clothes, souvenirs, non-perishable food i never ate. i’m happy to see him; i’m happy for a little bit. we place an order for delivery at our favorite taco place, and i’m joking about post-tour depression as i walk out the door to go buy beer downtown real quick. already drinking at 1:30 pm! post-tour depression, is it a thing? probably not. there’s probably nothing wrong with me. 

i check my work email and the dread floods in, full force. i did promise that i’d work from home, and i did, but there weren’t a lot of time sensitive matters. i took care of some youtube community engagement, checked stats on videos uploaded while i was gone, checked the socials throughout the day. 

i’m home in time for the next E3 conference but i’m not even paying attention. my work laptop sits in front of me, screen glaring back at me as i’m not even using it. i’m on the couch looking out the window and seconds later tears are pouring down my face. seemingly, with no rhyme or reason. 

well the crying thing happens like every 3-5 days lmao

but it just, didn’t stop. at one point i turn to jeremiah sobbing hysterically and he just holds me. like a broken record all i could say was “i hate that i have to go back to work tomorrow, i loathe that tour is over and this is just it, no more for the year. i have to wait until next year to go out again.” 

and to be transparent, this is sort of the melancholy that has sat with me ever since that day. i wake up five days a week and drive the longest hour and five minutes of my life to work, and back home again in an hour and twenty, sometimes thirty, sometimes forty. 

for my entire adulthood (let’s say like going back to age 18), i’ve dreaded my mid-20s. because my parents would warn me “you need a full-time job by the time you turn 26. you’re going to have to worry about health insurance. we’re going to turn over your bills to you.” so since then, my entire experience of living has been haunted by this death clock ticking down to year 26 of my life. so at 18, i said that by age 22 i needed to be somewhere with my music or i needed to give it up. completely. 

hah.

the first few years of my 20′s i coasted. my band broke up so there went my shot at playing shows until i found something new. without delving into too much detail- for three years i dated someone and because i wasn’t happy i lost a lot of time. i finally recorded music again towards the end of that relationship. when i left that person at age 22 it felt like an entire world opened up to me. an enormous weight was lifted off my shoulders and i was free. i was starting over, in the best way possible. and then mere weeks after, something serendipitous happened- a friend i met because of that relationship approached me, offering to fill-in for drums for me so that i could play shows. 

i was now 23. we were way past the cut-off date for me to be pursuing music seriously. but i couldn’t say no. and now here we are. 

i stayed at my dead-end, incredibly far-from-home job for too long and now i’m finding difficulty finding something closer to home. i almost had a job a few times but i got scared of losing the ability to tour due to the nature of each company, so i idiotically turned those opportunities down. it seems like, to get signed to a label, you have to be both churning out digital content AND actively touring. if we could get a booking agent and/or signed to a great label i would quit my job immediately and work at a coffee shop. i just can’t swing an intense touring schedule if i get a serious full-time job in marketing. i just want to see how far i can take this band. yet, i may be screwing my future after the band if i don’t settle for a better job than just starbucks. but i don’t want to settle, at all. i’ve been panicking about this for a year now and recently my stress has become paramount, ruining every other day for me. when i sit down to practice and feel like i’ve barely accomplished anything in that practice session, i break down. because i feel like i’m running out of time. always. i have a finite amount of time and i’m running out. 

so if you haven’t seen me lately, that’s probably why. i feel guilty for going out and spending time with friends because i feel like it’s time i could be spending on music. and i work day in and day out on my singing, guitar playing, writing, learning new tools for my craft, maybe i’ll go to kickboxing or the gym so that i stay in shape... and that’s it. and it’s crushing me. managing the band takes the fun out of everything too. i’ve become such an irritable person. i hate it. i feel like i’m not myself anymore. but i don’t think the problem is music. i don’t hate music- i hate this pressure to have every facet of my life fit perfectly together. i hate not having the freedom to only worry about music. being in a serious/active band is time-consuming. i realize i can’t have it all- the stable job with money and benefits and the life of a musician- but the pressures i’ve faced my entire life to settle for security have been making me lose my mind. 

i hope that something good happens next year. i hope that something good happens sooner than that. i’m pretty sure this is how i wrapped the last tour journal too. but this has been my entire life- praying that things will just work out and that something good will happen. a year from now when i look back, i hope that i can regret any worry i’ve ever had. but if i find myself looking back in regret, no longer able to tour/pursue music seriously, i’m just grateful it all happened. 

[blacknerdproblems]

*spoilers* 

Jaime visiting the Meals Gold On Wheels and taking a cut out to help the co-conspirators. He grabs a Looney Toons Yosemite Sam size bag of money and gives it to Bronn, who is so happy about his new riches that he complains about more money. Apparently, Bronn’s signing bonus included a fully defensible crib too, so this rather large back of gold that damn near has a dollar sign drawn on it is pocket change compared to what he got coming. Bronn might actually be Drake the of Westeros. Relentlessly shameless. Inappropriate in fan pleasing ways. Sings when he knows he ain’t got no business doing that shit. Easily turned out by women. 

Mycroft from the Iron Bank is flattering Cersei on her paying her debt back by destroying the richest house left in Westeros. Cersei ain’t really about this flattery shit if it ain’t coming from a blood relative her age though. She Funk Flex drops The Golden Company, who be some of the best mercenary group out of Essos. That’s 10K Large trained soldiers that will get in the fucking muck for you if the coin be right. LOL…yeah…I got that Bran Netflix Cersei, I can tell that you gonna need them cats.

Little Restrainer Order walks straight off the set of To Catch a Predator and somehow gets in a room with the youngest living Stark. How they make him look EXTRA creepy, fam. 80% of LRO’s scene take place in rooms with one lonely ass candle in the corner. Since they can’t have him rolling around in an unmarked white van, I guess dimly lit spaces with no visible exits will have to do.

Maaaaaaaan, Arya BAAAAAAAAACK. Fam, Arya ain’t been home since Episode One. She ain’t been to the crib since The Phantom Menace, yo. She definitely rolled up like the cat that forgot their VIP pass, but thought they could just talk their way into bottle service without the wristband and shit. Everybody believed Arya been dead since before she hit puberty, so they ain’t believing her when she trying to educate them on that Stark lineage. The guards are tired of her shit, so they try to make her leave by force and she hit that bullet time on your boy one time.

At Dragonstone, Missandei and Daenerys walking that Great Wall stroll and Missandei is like, yeah, I told Grey Worm to pick up some eggs on the way home and his ass late. Daenerys is like, girl, as fine as you are, you know dude knows where home is. He ain’t going nowhere. Daenerys asked what happened between them and Missandei just hit her with “many things.” Maaaaaaaaaaaannnnnn, when the recall memory put a smile on your partners face that large you must have been PUTTIN’ NUMBERS ON THE BOARD. 

But they straight up “TNT: We Know Drama-ed the ending. Bronn gonna come through with the miraculous Waterboy tackle from off screen right before Drogon turned these dudes into a bucket of chicken with 11 secret herbs and spices. Now, Jaime and Bronn are in the sunken place so they can wash up somewhere else and not burned fucking alive. Sigh.

Read on here [x]

[theconservativebrief]

The next two weeks are some of the busiest on the TV calendar, with nearly two dozen new series debuting across broadcast, cable, and streaming networks.

Some of these releases are among the most high-profile shows their networks have on offer, including NBC’s big bet at finding the next ER. And some of them are quirky little half-hour dramas imported from Australia. But we’ve watched all of them — and everything else that’s around — and we’re highlighting the ones we think are the most interesting.

Few of these shows are great, and we often have limited information on whether they’ll get better. (It’s rare-to-impossible for broadcast networks, especially, to send out many episodes to critics beyond the first couple.) But there’s something inside all of these shows worth checking out, especially if you’re a particular fan of their genres.

Read on for thoughts on CBS’s FBI, NBC’s New Amsterdam, FX’s Mr. Inbetween, and ABC’s A Million Little Things. We’ll be back later in the week with thoughts on shows debuting between Thursday and Sunday.

(A note: We’ve only given ratings to shows where we feel we’ve seen enough episodes to judge how successful they will be long-term, which for right now is just Mr. Inbetween.)

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TV super-producer Dick Wolf has launched two franchises that completely took over NBC. The first was Law & Order, which launched five spinoffs (as well as a recently announced sixth, Law & Order: Hate Crimes). One spinoff, Law & Order: SVU, has now run almost as long as the original — 434 episodes to the original’s 456 (it should catch up in May of 2019).

And then there’s the Chicago franchise, spun off of Chicago Fire; it now encompasses four shows, three of which are still running.

The point is: Dick Wolf knows how to make an iron-clad procedural, even if his premise is as vague as, “Here are some FBI agents.” And now that Wolf has joined forces with CBS — a network that never met a crime-solving drama it couldn’t turn into a big hit — to make a show about those very FBI agents, it’s not hard to imagine the two could make beautiful, bloody corpses together. (This is the first series Wolf has produced for a network other than NBC since a 2003 reboot of Dragnet for ABC.)

Whether you enjoy FBI will depend heavily on how happy you are to consume stories as un-skeptical of law enforcement as this one, or on how much seeing Wolf’s signature font in the closing credits will fill you with happy memories of long, wintry Saturdays watching episode after episode of vintage Law & Order.

But as always, the show is brilliantly cast (putting Missy Peregrym at the FBI’s center suggests Wolf has found his new Mariska Hargitay), perfectly paced, and solidly constructed. Is it great TV? Nah. But it’s highly competent TV, and that counts for something in this day and age. —Todd VanDerWerff

FBI debuts Tuesday, September 25, at 9 pm Eastern on CBS.

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I kept watching New Amsterdam, NBC’s new medical drama set in a public hospital that doesn’t turn away patients, thinking I had seen much of it before. On the one hand, I had — it’s hard to break new ground in the medical drama genre in the post-The Good Doctor, post-Grey’s Anatomy, post-ER, post-St. Elsewhere, post-Marcus Welby, M.D. universe. But even more specifically, the series feels like it’s riffing on Fox’s medical drama The Resident, now in its second season, which is too minor of a show to rip off.

But where The Resident and its doctors who care so much that they won’t stop trying to save lives!! are aggro in an irritating way, New Amsterdam takes some of that show’s ideas and pulls back on them just enough to become a fitting series to air right after NBC’s mega-hit This Is Us.

New Amsterdam, like This Is Us, is more interested in making you cry than anything else, and both series are busy, bustling shows with lots of characters who are wildly varied in terms of how compelling they are. Nobody is trying to reinvent the wheel, but maybe the wheel doesn’t need to be reinvented.

If there’s going to be something different about New Amsterdam, it will be thanks to the show’s central two characters, Dr. Max Goodwin (Ryan Eggold) and Dr. Hana Sharpe (Freema Agyeman). Goodwin is a no-nonsense reformer who takes over New Amsterdam Hospital and immediately starts ruffling feathers and making big changes — but he’s also got a big secret, one he’s only comfortable really sharing with Sharpe.

Again, nothing new here, and Eggold isn’t close to the level of Agyeman’s performance. But the details ring true, and the second episode improves on the first, which is always a good sign. —TV

New Amsterdam debuts Tuesday, September 25, at 10 pm Eastern on NBC. It’s weird that this show exists when there was a Fox drama about an immortal police officer of exactly the same name just 10 years ago, but you probably forgot that one existed, huh? It starred Jaime Lannister!

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As strange as it might sound, the market for hitman TV shows in 2018 is a crowded one. The latest on the scene is FX’s Mr. Inbetween, created by, written by, and starring Scott Ryan. It draws on a lot of what we’ve seen already this year in Barry, as Ray Shoesmith (Ryan) tries to balance the ins and outs of his job with his domestic life, though Mr. Inbetween is tonally a little closer to Killing Eve on its default level of darkness.

That’s not to say that Mr. Inbetween is lacking for laughs — if anything, the deadpan humor on which Ray operates is the main reason to tune in. Ryan’s performance is transfixing, as he’s hilarious and horrifying by turns. Bald, slightly gaunt, and sporting a grin that wouldn’t look amiss on the Joker, Ryan infuses Ray with a volatility that vaults him up to one of the more impressive turns of the year. He’s opaque in a way that his TV contemporaries aren’t, which makes it all the more frightening when he finally lashes out.

The story that’s built around him, however, isn’t quite as solid. The brevity of the season — it’s just six episodes long (all of which were sent out for review), with each episode clocking in at around 25 minutes — means that it moves at a neat clip.

This is to the show’s advantage as far as recommendations are concerned, but it also doesn’t leave a lot of time to accomplish all that much. Ryan is great, but Mr. Inbetween never manages to land on one side of the fence or the other as far as whether Ray is actually the force of justice that he seems to think himself to be.

The show also never reckons with the fact that there needs to be a little more meat on the bones of a story about a white man getting away with everything for it to really stick in a contemporary cultural landscape. But given how trim it is, Mr. Inbetween is charming enough, and Ryan’s performance shouldn’t be missed. —Karen Han

Mr. Inbetween debuts with two back-to-back episodes Tuesday, September 25, at 11:30 pm Eastern on FX, in between airings of Mayans M.C.

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A Million Little Things, ABC’s new drama about a group of friends dealing with a tragedy, is one of the first big network dramas to really feel like an attempt to copy what made This Is Us such a big hit.

And in brief, fitful moments throughout the first three episodes, it really does get at some interesting things about adult friendships, male bonding rituals, and the burden of mental illness. But it’s also a cautionary tale about what happens when network notes won’t just let a premise be.

In the opening moments of the show’s pilot, Jon (Ron Livingston) kills himself, interrupting the lives of his three best friends and their assorted loved ones and other compatriots. (Livingston will continue to appear throughout at least season one, in flashbacks and the like.)

The death affects each character differently, and the show’s most successful moments deal with how depression can affect a life, especially when Jon’s friend Rome (Romany Malco) sees in his friend’s suicide a reflection of his own suicidal ideation and finally decides to pursue therapy. It’s the sort of subject matter broadcast network dramas don’t always tackle, and rarely with the sort of emotional depth Things displays from time to time.

Unfortunately, the rest of the time, A Million Little Things is burdening itself with an over-busy mystery story about why Jon might have killed himself and the plan he set in motion to help take care of his friends after his death, which sometimes makes him feel like an all-seeing god and at other times makes him feel like a mildly cheeky ghost.

A Million Little Things shows that it understands how depression can hurt even people who seem to have it all together. So why does it need to have a big mystery about what John might have been up to, except for network fears that nobody would care about a group of friends learning to deal without one of them being there? (Yes, it’s similar to This Is Us, but that show kept the central death a mystery from the audience, not the characters, to deliberately mimic emotional repression. A Million Little Things has no similar creative justification.) It stands in the way of a show that would otherwise hold promise. —TV

A Million Little Things debuts Wednesday at 10 pm Eastern on ABC. No, it’s not based on the famous James Frey “memoir.” That’s A Million Little Pieces.

CBS’s Magnum P.I. (Monday, 9 pm) is a terminally boring reboot of the Hawaii-set detective drama. No show that begins with a man skydiving from space should be this uninvolving!

NBC’s Manifest (Monday, 10 pm) wastes a good premise — a plane experiences turbulence that seemingly transports it forward in time five years — in favor of weak-sauce family drama and mystical hooey.

ABC’s Single Parents (Wednesday, 9:30 pm) has a great cast (including Leighton Meester and Brad Garrett) and great creators (New Girl’s Elizabeth Meriweather and J.J. Philbin) but a pilot that tries to do way too much with a thin premise (a bunch of single parents hang out). Maybe it’ll get better?

Original Source -> 4 new TV shows to check out this week, from Australian hitmen to beleaguered doctors

via The Conservative Brief