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#i also got the sense poirot will be ok
poirott · 11 months
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A HAUNTING IN VENICE (2023), dir. Kenneth Branagh
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mxdam · 11 months
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this is one of my favorite deleted scenes from cinderella 2015, even if i have a lot of qualms and criticisms about its framing and about the choices made in the construction of it. one of the things that really makes this movie (and frankly all live-action disney adaptations) suffer is its reliance on tropes; understandable to some extent, it's a fairy tale, but also frustrating on another level because it saps the movie of a unique voice and vision. it's absolutely possible to make a fairy tale adaptation with all the tropes involved without being so milquetoast and sort of Cultural Image Smoothie about it. the "umbrellas in the rain" that branagh talks about in the beginning are just a sad victorian image, not necessarily something that tells us about the movie itself or about the characters (except for the pointed exclusion of ella).
i will talk however about what this scene shows us about margarethe and what it means regarding her feelings at this time as well as her relationship to ella. ms. blanket does a lot in moments like the ones here and i have to imagine that branagh, as the director, encouraged her, which means that the deep ambivalence she shows toward ella in this scene and elsewhere is a "true" element of the character, in line with both their visions for lady tremaine's story. not that i value mr. branagh's vision so much (i could talk at length about his poirot) but insofar as this movie does have a direction and a voice, this is part of it.
the first thing i will discuss is the lack of sympathy for margarethe's position in the narration and framing. to a certain extent, this is OK for two reasons: 1. she is an absolute dick 2. the story is about ella and not her.
that being said, it must be emphasized that auguste's death has left the family destitute. for margarethe, this is the SECOND time in just about 2 years that a husband has suddenly died on her and left her alone; she married auguste in the first place specifically because of the financial security he offered. the fact that they have no income at all, maybe not even savings, hints that he was not as financially secure as margarethe thought, despite the fact that he probably had an older-money background than either marg or francis (who was a nouveau riche merchant with no particular background in money or nobility despite his later acquisition of a title). (this old-money background is speculation from the many times kat and i got drunk and watched this movie together btw. it just felt right when he suggested it.)
margarethe's position here is precarious. she has nothing. she is nothing. a woman without a man and without money to live off of is nothing in her social milieu, and i have to point out how deeply, deeply humiliating it must be for her to have to fire the servants and sell off household goods. this is not something she wants to do. she is lazy. she is annoying. she loves having things. she does not want to have to take the "economies" mentioned by the narrator. any analysis of this scene without taking that into account is lacking, and when you understand that for a woman of her social aspirations it is embarrassing and horrible to not have servants to take care of her house, to have to sell the very stuff out of her late husband's armoire to get by, her coldness and hostility make more sense. she is making a series of choices that she hates to do but must do to survive. and that is what margarethe is, a survivor at all costs, no matter what.
to continue: this deleted scene has many moments where margarethe is looking at ella. i have talked many times about their relationship and about the gaze of margarethe looking at ella. i must reiterate from the linked post that the gaze margarethe uses on ella here is a gaze of identification. she identifies with ella. she relates to ella. she understands ella. does that mean she loves or likes her? no. does it change that she is appallingly cruel to her? no. but it does mean that her feelings toward her are more complex and meaningful than just hatred or contempt. here are some shots of how marg looks at ella when ella doesn't know she's being looked at.
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these are not hateful glowers. certainly they are not positive or loving gazes, but they are not the looks of a woman who is full of loathing and contempt. (i would suggest that the leftmost image does have a degree of schadenfreude in it--marg has a few moments like these which i think of as her "polishing her hate" by watching ella in pain.) if she despised ella you'd think she'd be laughing or smirking or something more than these cool, stony-faced, ambivalent stares. but her relation to ella is much more complex and to reduce it to simple hatred is to do a disservice to the work put in here both on cate's part and (unfortunately i must say) on branagh's part, given the way the camera lingers on margarethe in these moments and the deliberate inclusion of these takes.
my takeaway from this deleted scene is and always has been the incredible ambiguity of margarethe and her feelings and actions in the story. the narrator (that is, ella's fairy godmother) repeatedly attempts to characterize her in the simplest, most antagonistic terms, and insofar as this is ella's story, again, that makes sense; but margarethe repeatedly defies the narration by imbuing even her most stereotypically evil-stepmothery actions with a dimension of complexity, grief, and ambivalence. despite the fairy tale framing of the overall story, margarethe as a character resists it, becoming a kind of rogue actor in a tale where she's meant to play a simplistic part.
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edith-moonshadow · 3 years
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Private detective billy femme fatale or omega fatale steve
Ok, you have no idea how much this speaks to me, I love film noir so much and Steve as a femme fatale is everything. I’m actually writing a story right now where Billy is a private detective and it’s set in the ’40s but it’s more of a murder mystery and Poirot like in nature.
So I’m imagining, it’s the 1940’s Billy as a hard-boiled detective, a little down on his luck, he’s world-weary recently lost his detective partner and he’s thinking about moving on when Steve sways his way into his office asking for Billy’s help. Billy doesn’t fully trust him but all Steve has to do is bat his pretty eyelashes at him and Billy finds his resolve crumbling. He soon finds himself embroiled in a complicated plot revolving around blackmail, murder and greed trying to untangle all the various lies and motivations while trying not to get too distracted by Steve with his long legs and pretty face.
Steve as an Omega, I can see him sauntering his way into Billy’s office his sweet scent in the air, he keeps his eyes big and demure. Billy can feel his mouth and teeth ache, all he can think about is getting his hands on Steve, barely able to pay attention to what he’s telling him even though he knows that he can’t trust him. Billy is intrigued by Steve’s problem but is driven by wanting to see him again, he takes the case focused on what he’s doing then Steve turns up and Billy is all over him until you get to the end where everything is resolved Steve was involved but instead of turning him in Billy knots him and bonds him because Steve was his from the moment he walked into his office.
On a side note, there’s a noir called The Big Sleep based on a Raymond Chandler book, it stars Humphrey Bogart and Lauren Becall, Bogart plays Philip Marlowe and is hired by a rich General because he’s being blackmailed. I imagine Steve in this story to act as a combination of the two sisters, coy and playful upfront with a tough interior making Billy have to work for it.
In this film Marlowe calls all the women ‘Angel’ and even though I love Billy calling Steve ‘Princess’ (maybe even a little too much) there’s something about the way that Bogart said ‘Angel’ that personally makes me melt and I’d totally be down for Billy calling Steve that in this story (although someone might need to pry Princess off me.)
There’s a great scene in a bookshop where he notices that the girl who works there is attractive but he wants her to remove her glasses first and it’s heavily implied that they’re going to pass the time in the carnal sense but the hays code was very much still in effect so it’s all expressed through dialogue, it’s wonderful.
Also, my mind is totally running to Steve dressed in a garter belt and stockings bent over Billy’s desk while he “punishes” him for leading him down the garden path on this case but that’s probably just me.
I love this idea so much, I only worry about attempting to write the really smart, innuendo-laden dialogue that you get in noir, I’m not sure I could pull that off but Steve as a scheming femme fatale giving Billy doe eyes while he’s got a gun hidden in his pocket and is neck-deep in the case that he’s involving Billy in is everything.
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luvdsc · 5 years
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i mean, i love carbs lol. do u make paninis alot? i'm bilingual in tamil (regional lang in india) and english💕 r u bilingual? dang, my school has german, french, spanish, latin, and chinese. lit everyone at my school wears tights, hoodies, etc like formal wear who??? i told one of my friends ab being carriers but they're like "then old people should stay home" and that is just 😥 i don't have disney+ so i just watch clips on youtube🤣. i've been watching 90s romcoms bc of current situation[1/3]
it’s nice and relaxing+animated movies like i watched kungfu panda twice in the same day 🤪 i was all over nancy drew as a kid have u heard ab the tv show on the cw? i might watch it 👀 i honestly think agatha christie is such a boss like her character poirot is fire :) yeah he did direct it+us. he does sketches w/Keegan key. i’ve heard a lot ab b99 but haven’t watched it so maybe I’ll do that. everyone recommends it to me bc it’s up my alley is it about cops? or do i have the wrong show? [2/3]
jaemin is my bias in the dreamies and haechan bias wrecks me along with jeno and renjun in dream. in 127, mark is my bias, but taeyong, jaehyun, and taeil are just 🤩😍🤩😍 and johnny… ugh what a man am i rite. in superm, markey sharkey and baekhyun take the cake although taemin is just 👀 i’m surprised i didnt ask u this earlier. do u have one bias for all the group or different ones for subunits or… [4/4]
✿ ✿ ✿
( i’m not sure if there was supposed to be a third part or if it’s out of 3/3 but i got these messages only, honey bee!! )
my heart says yes to all the carbs, but my body says no rip. i miss being able to go to the gym everyday with the quarantine in place ): at home, i do! at uni, my dining hall has a gourmet sandwich station, and i usually got a panini made for me there for lunch everyday! omg that’s amazing, so you’re trilingual with german too :o yeah, i’m bilingual with english and vietnamese! and i can do enough spanish to get me around spain, so there’s that :’) omg that sounds so much better, like my hs made us wear our skirts even during the winter for formal days /: alksjhfdlkjasd even if old people stay at home, if your friend visits them and is a carrier, they can get it from your friend though ): i hope their parents aren’t in that age range, or they aren’t near their grandparents then because that’d be horrible.
omg yess i’ve been binging 90s romcoms, too. i haven’t watched kung fu panda in so long, but maybe i should now! YES omg i love nancy drew!!! i still have so many of her books on the shelves; i was reading some of them the other day!! and yeah, i’ve heard of it! perhaps, it’s the perfect time to start watching it. oooh yess, poirot! i see the tv show playing often, but i’ve never stopped to watch it. my mom loves it though! omg yeah, one of my friends watches key and peele! and yes, b99 is about cops!!! a new ep just came out today, and i’m so excited to watch it :’)
omg jaemin is an absolute sweetheart 💞 haechan is honestly so good at everything, like pls spare some of your talent to us regular folk. jeno is always so nice, and i think he’s so funny but maybe it’s just because i like corny jokes alkjsdhfas and omg renjun!!! his sarcasm and wit and i love love love his art so much! oooh mark is honestly that one member where even if you don’t bias him, you bias him. 127 is just full of fine men huh, although i wanna know the reason why jungwoo won’t introduce his sister to johnny 👀👀 also A++ choices for superm!!!
oooh ok, so dream will always be the superior group, and i love my children all equally!!!! but maybe i favor renjun once in a while winwin is my overall favorite though!!! so he’s my bias in 127 and wayv; i’m sad he’s not active with 127 anymore because i won’t get to see him perform ): but he’s doing so well in wayv, and he talks more, which makes me happy! doyoung and yuta are close seconds in 127, and taemin is my favorite in superm 💓 idk with my biases, i tend to choose people i wanna be friends with and are most similar to, like i would love to be friends with winwin and renjun. it’s usually the bias wrecker who’s the one that’s actually close to my romantic ideal type if that makes sense?
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verdigrisprowl · 6 years
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May 12 Bevel’s Movie Night - Peter Pan Goes Wrong & Steven Universe
None of the robots in the room figured out that this was a comedy; they instead thought it was a serious play that was actually going terribly wrong. It was funny until the injuries started pouring in. But then it was funny again.
Afterwards they talked about vacations. Soundwave took as little as ten vacation days during the entire war, and Prowl thinks that a proper vacation is four years long. Both of them are baffled by the other.
VProwl ((they're using semicolons wrong and it's painful)) ((almost every single one of these should be a colon)) ((or a dash)) Bevel ((i find it kind of hilarious, like that Ironic song VProwl ((oh my god)) ((okay they're forgiven they just said they should be colons)) ((im laughing now)) ItsyBitsySpyers ((god that was so aggravating to me lmao)) VProwl ((the pain was worth the punchline)) Bevel ((hehe ((i'll start once this song is over? ItsyBitsySpyers ((POIROT)) *Soundwave trudges in and drops onto his seat... and leans forward to stare at the speaker a little longer. Hmm. Nah.* Bevel *waves in greeting* VProwl *appears, drops onto his seat next to Soundwave, and leans on him.* Bevel ((hold on, I thought this had preloaded but I guess not ItsyBitsySpyers *Soundwave waves to Bevel, wraps a feeler around Prowl, and leans back.*
[[They're acting out the animated film with the-- oh dear.]] ItsyBitsySpyers *...Did they even rehearse?* *Points.* [[Mawg.]] VProwl ... What? ItsyBitsySpyers [[The Nana. It is a man-dog. Like Barf.]] VProwl *he's having a hard time keeping up, he's being distracted by the audience.* *snorts at the dog door.* ItsyBitsySpyers *Loud huff at the dog's solution* VProwl *snorts again* ... Is that the same person? ItsyBitsySpyers [[He... he thinks so. The accents are different but the voice print is the same.]] Bevel *giggles* VProwl Heh. *... sees the skirt underneath. snorts.* ItsyBitsySpyers *BLIP* VProwl Hah! ItsyBitsySpyers [[This is - this is the worst production he's ever /seen./ ]] Bevel They are trying their best. It is just not very good. ItsyBitsySpyers [[And he sat through "Two Mechs and a Baler".]] VProwl *his shoulders are trembling the whole time the father squeezes out the door.* *shoulders are trembling harder* Bevel *giggles harder* VProwl *okay, it's constant now* ItsyBitsySpyers *He's slouching with a hand over his facemask with the effort to not burst out audibly laughing* VProwl *he's got a hand over his mouth to.* ItsyBitsySpyers [[Primus!]] Bevel *gasps* VProwl /Hiff!/ VProwl *bends over with both hands over his mouth* ItsyBitsySpyers [[Wake the--!]] VProwl I-is it her again—! Bevel I th-think it is. VProwl *snorts.* *bends over laughing again* ItsyBitsySpyers [[If that is his shadow, he should look into getting better lighting.]] VProwl *elbows Soundwave. don't make it worse.* ItsyBitsySpyers *Gently pats Prowl's knee. He's sor--oh no.* VProwl *bends over trembling* Bevel *laughs* VProwl *ends up with his forehead resting on Soundwave's knee as he wheezes* ItsyBitsySpyers [[Bevel, where did you find this - this trainwreck.]] Bevel Internet! ItsyBitsySpyers *Gently patting Prowl's back.* [[And a pair of wires.]] VProwl *he's. he's gonna. stay down here for a while.* ItsyBitsySpyers *It's like watching overcharged Seekers, Primus help him, he's half bent over Prowl himself laughing.* Bevel *covers her mouth with both her hands to stifle her laughter* VProwl *he's not quite laughing out loud but he's audibly squeaking.* ItsyBitsySpyers [[Thank goodness, the Narrator. A break.]] *Soundwave's vents are in fact loudly wheezing.* VProwl *recovers while the poor stagefrightened actress is stuttering over her lines.* ItsyBitsySpyers [[She's never growing up now.]] Bevel Oh no, poor Tootles. VProwl *okay, somebody is crying, that's enough to calm him down. he's sitting up again.* ... Aren't they going to get h— pff. ItsyBitsySpyers [[Isn't that the same human who played the other creator...]] Bevel I think it--oh no VProwl *points at the one that repeats other people's quotes.* It's you. ItsyBitsySpyers *HUFF* Bevel BOO! VProwl *covers his mouth again.* Bevel *giggles into her hands again* ItsyBitsySpyers *One feeler wiggles a single claw while he collapses against Prowl.* VProwl *sharp laugh* Bevel She is playing so many characters. VProwl *that costume change* ItsyBitsySpyers [[Not well.]] Bevel Arse *squeaks* VProwl *mumbles* arsenal. Bevel *mimics them* swuuuuuurd VProwl *wheezing against Soundwave* that's the worst accent I've e-ever. ItsyBitsySpyers *Taps.* [[It was you.]] *The boat cop.* VProwl *LAUGH* Bevel Aw no 😔 VProwl *winces* Ooh. ItsyBitsySpyers [[Oh...]] VProwl *well. that dimmed his spirits.* ItsyBitsySpyers [[...Is the fleshling dead?]] Bevel I hope not. VProwl *well now it's not funny.* ItsyBitsySpyers [[...This is horrid.]] VProwl *nods* *and now we're hearing about a death on stage.* ItsyBitsySpyers [[Why would he pass the time by telling this.]] Bevel *buries her face in her hands, oh no this is going so badly now* VProwl It must have been weighing on him for years. ItsyBitsySpyers [[The show does not need to go on.]] VProwl No, it doesn't. Bevel *looks up* Oh, the nervous girl is ok. That is good. VProwl I—I admire their dedication, but... *winces* *winces again* Bevel *not as ok as Bevel had hoped* VProwl *winces a third time* ItsyBitsySpyers *He hopes nobody's parked in the ambulance bay today.* VProwl ... This must be very common in live human performances. The audience appears to not mind. ItsyBitsySpyers [[Is that a stagehand?]] VProwl It looks like it. It's certainly not an understudy, he didn't learn the part. ItsyBitsySpyers [[...He hopes there is a third one available.]] Bevel ...They should stop saying that line. VProwl *winces a fourth time. ... but also laughs.* *just. just a tiny bit.* *it just. fwoomp. into his face.* ... I didn't realize human productions were so perilous. ItsyBitsySpyers [[Don't touch it, human. It's cursed.]] VProwl Oh, he's alright. Thank goodness. ItsyBitsySpyers *Shakes his helm. How sad.* Bevel Yay he is alive. VProwl ... hf. Bevel *giggles* Oh no VProwl ... Why doesn't he just put it on the table and pull out the cork with his hand? ItsyBitsySpyers [[Thrown off by all the injuries, he assumes.]] VProwl That would make sense. ItsyBitsySpyers *Sharp intake* VProwl ... There goes half their cast. ItsyBitsySpyers *Points* VProwl Is—is that Poirot?! ItsyBitsySpyers [[He knew it.]] VProwl *he had NO CLUE* Bevel *giggles* ItsyBitsySpyers [[He must have been investigating. At least he knows it wasn't murders.]] VProwl ... That /worked/? Bevel Maybe she is a fairy? VProwl It must have been the noise. VProwl *... small snort.* Bevel CAB VProwl ... Oh, this isn't going to end well. Bevel That did not end well at all. VProwl *winces. again.* ItsyBitsySpyers *Huffs despite himself.* VProwl *... snorts at the chaos on the stage.* *LAUGHS. THERE IT—THERE IT GOES* ItsyBitsySpyers *DID THEY NOT PUT BRAKES ON THAT THING?* Bevel *giggles* VProwl *leans on soundwave for support. the—the ship—it just. it kept going.* Wh-what is that thing—? ItsyBitsySpyers [[What is the red monster.]] Bevel *whispers* Snap, snap, snap. ItsyBitsySpyers [[A crocodile, here?]] VProwl I—I don't even—what species— *he's still laughing* ItsyBitsySpyers *Polite applause playback.* [[Well done to the ones who survived.]] Bevel The stand-in survived! He was dancing with everyone. VProwl I— Is... Poir... *he finally gets a hand over his mouth and manages to get down to silent shaking.* ItsyBitsySpyers *Flops back against the couch and flares his vents to try to cool down.* *Puffs his armor out too. Get all that air in there.* VProwl *goes back with soundwave. he's still leaning on him for support.* ItsyBitsySpyers *Will try not to puff too much hot air on the avatar. He curls the feeler tighter.* ItsyBitsySpyers [[...He has a lion?]] Bevel Yeah, he found it in the desert. ItsyBitsySpyers *Tiny huffing.* Bevel *laughs* VProwl *okay. all right. he's finally recovering.* ItsyBitsySpyers [[....What just happened to h-- that toddler is stealing currency.]] Bevel ((i still can't believe they got away with that joke VProwl They can shapeshift, can't they? Bevel Yeah. ItsyBitsySpyers [[Oh, yes. That's right. The cat fingers.]] VProwl He's not very good at it. ItsyBitsySpyers [[This is horrifying.]] Bevel He is really not. ItsyBitsySpyers [[Humans should not transform.]] Bevel Just me. *grins* ItsyBitsySpyers [[And the rest of us. If not as much.]] Bevel Yeah. Bevel ... ItsyBitsySpyers [[....Is that how you get yours.]] VProwl Yes. ItsyBitsySpyers *Slow turn to stare.* Bevel *looks at Prowl* Can you do it now? VProwl *looks back at Soundwave* ItsyBitsySpyers [[Yes. Do show us.]] VProwl *waves his hands vaguely in the air. An extremely badly-rendered roll of police tape appears in his hand.* Bevel *claps* VProwl *it's basically a solid yellow cylinder with a hole in the middle and black text around the outside.* ItsyBitsySpyers *There's a long, long silence from Soundwave.*
*And then he just sends an affection ping.* VProwl *sends an affection ping back.* VProwl *sets the roll on Soundwave's lap and settles against him again.* *well. "roll."* ... Why didn't he just tell them that the moss is dangerous. ItsyBitsySpyers *Picks the "roll" up and gives it a closer look, curious. He then subspaces it.*
[[Someone should show this to Wheeljack.]] VProwl *without holomatter avatar access, it immediately vanishes.* ItsyBitsySpyers [[And they were told. There was police tape.]] *Alas. He was hoping it would stay so he could inspect its specifics later.* VProwl This is true. But they didn't know why it was there. If they thought it was a threat to their own life rather than merely what they saw as an apparently arbitrary restriction, they might have taken it more seriously. ItsyBitsySpyers [[A good point.]]
[[Someone should have thought of that before that play.]] Bevel Magic axe sounds cool. VProwl What, police tape? ItsyBitsySpyers [[Telling the people their lives were at risk.]] *Pause.* [[And police tape.]]
[[Axes are... axes. He's never been fond of external weaponry.]] Bevel Swords are still the best. ItsyBitsySpyers [[Like the Star Saber?]] Bevel :< I found it. I just gotta go get it. ItsyBitsySpyers [[...That was probably a bad idea.]] VProwl It was. Bevel ...oh. ItsyBitsySpyers [[....Imagine that with energon cubes.]] VProwl Where does the spare matter come from? ItsyBitsySpyers [[Landfills? Humans have many.]] VProwl ... Ah. It's holomatter. Bevel Like them! ItsyBitsySpyers [[Oh. That isn't useful for energon replication at all.]] Bevel *sits forward, swords* ItsyBitsySpyers *...Sits up.* [[He never thought of using his for that.]] VProwl You'd either be controlling both halves and thus not actually fighting, or else you'd have to preprogram it to fight independently. ItsyBitsySpyers [[Preprogramming it can't be that difficult.]] Bevel *sucks in air between her teeth* Pearl is great. ItsyBitsySpyers *Blip* VProwl *!!* Bevel No! VProwl ... Is SHE holomatter? Are those HOLOMATTER GENERATORS? ItsyBitsySpyers [[Fascinating.]] Bevel ...gems refract light! *finds this delightful* ItsyBitsySpyers [[Holomatter generators that can still function in pieces, apparently. Modular?]] VProwl What do you mean, "function in pieces"? ItsyBitsySpyers [[They have used pieces to do things in the past.]] VProwl Pieces of gems? Bevel Like the pants? ItsyBitsySpyers [[That is what they looked like.]] VProwl Oh. Hm. ItsyBitsySpyers [[Yes, like the pants.]] Bevel She cut the tree in half with a balloon. VProwl *somehow prowl suddenly likes pearl a little more.* ItsyBitsySpyers *Getting oddly fond of the Garnet gem.* Bevel *likes Steven but Pearl has swords and knows how to use them and it's great* ItsyBitsySpyers [[...He would, perhaps, program his figure to not function unless he was conscious.]] VProwl You also might want to program it to be a slightly poorer fighter than you. ItsyBitsySpyers [[...She changed her armor.]]
[[And only slightly.]] VProwl If you programmed it with your exact knowledge and skills, then any time you sparred with it, there'd be a fifty percent chance you'd lose. AND you'd have to program it to know when to stop, under a vast variety of circumstances. Bevel Shapeshifting hologram people. Awesome. ItsyBitsySpyers [[...Then again, a fifty percent chance of losing would force him to continuously improve rather than simply keep up. And he'll have nothing but time, soon.]]
[[Yes. Most interesting. He wonders how their gems decide what is too much damage...]] VProwl Yeah, but there's a fifty percent chance you'll die. ItsyBitsySpyers [[If he programmed it for death matches. He'd rather not come near to that again. Not for... for a while.]] VProwl After seven sparring sessions there's less than a one percent chance you're still alive. Could it be at your actual skill level if you programmed it to hold back? Bevel Maybe like almost at your skill level? VProwl It'd require a vast and delicate program to ensure that it's a formidable opponent, but not a real threat. ItsyBitsySpyers [[It certainly can't get much higher.]] *Not without becoming Megatron.* [[Hmm. An even longer task than could be performed on his vacation?]] VProwl ... I don't know what your programming skills are like. Bevel *nods... wait* You are going on vacation? VProwl Or how long a vacation you're planning on. ItsyBitsySpyers *Thoughtfully* [[Remind him to fix that some time.]]
[[Yes. As previously promised. Not for a few weeks. He is still rewriting the answering program. RAVAGE was moderately incompatible with Prowl's world's technology.]] ItsyBitsySpyers [[And he isn't certain yet. At least a week. He hasn't even decided where he is going.]] Bevel ...are you taking everyone with you? VProwl Only at least a week? ItsyBitsySpyers [[No, not everyone. Most have their own things they'd like to d--]] *Turn.* [["Only"?]] *Prowl, that's FOREVER* VProwl I was expecting a couple of years. Bevel *relaxes slightly* ItsyBitsySpyers [[A COUPLE OF Y--]] VProwl *starts. no need to shout, prowl's head is right here.* ItsyBitsySpyers *Realizes he's not moderating his mental volume and swiftly pings an apology.*
[[A couple of /years/? Absolutely not. He already did that. It was horrible.]] [[...Granted, it was here, and there was little to do at the time. But years...]] VProwl Are vacations in your universe usually only a week?? Or is that just you? *ya workaholic.* ItsyBitsySpyers *Pot, meet kettle.* [[Him.]]
[[Two years. He doesn't know what he would do with himself.]] *Glance at Bevel* [[Not even if he found Axiom Nexus.]] Bevel Axiom Nexus is just one city anyway. It is not /that/ interesting. VProwl I can recommend some shows. ItsyBitsySpyers [[He would learn all about it in one.]]
*Back to Prowl. Leaning in a little. It's sort of like squinting when you have a mask on.* [[...Are you trying to keep him away?]] [[Is there something you don't want him to know?]] VProwl What? *sits up, alarmed.* No, of course not. You said you wouldn't know what to do with two years. If the only thing keeping you from taking a proper vacation is not having something that could fill the time... You think I'm trying to hide something? *he's trying to figure out whether he should feel hurt.* Bevel *gonna just... tune out of this convo and watch the video* ItsyBitsySpyers *....Hmm. Sits back.*
[[No.]] *Well. That's a lie. Have to correct it.* [[Perhaps. A long-term surprise? You /are/ a former tactician.]] VProwl ... I don't do that. I— Surprises are—even nominally positive ones—I don't—think they're nice. ItsyBitsySpyers *And that is something he didn't know about Prowl before. He makes a note of it.* Bevel *mental note to never surprise Prowl, even with a good one* VProwl Especially not one that would take /two years/ to prepare. ItsyBitsySpyers [[... Then why that long?]] *Shakes his head.* [[Never mind. He is quickly bored, and long-term isolation is... unpleasant. Especially away from other Cybertronians.]]
*He's undergone it for missions before and during the war, but he's never liked the emptiness in his audials, both mental and physical.* VProwl What do you mean long? A proper vacation would be more like four years. ItsyBitsySpyers [[He's never taken a vacation that long in his /life./]] VProwl How long are vacations in YOUR universe? ItsyBitsySpyers [[That was mostly caste-dependent, prior to the war. Now, it's...]] *His hand twitches while he searches for a way to describe it.* [[He doesn't think anyone has set a standard. They go away however long they please, as long as their responsibilities don't suffer.]] VProwl Give me a range. ItsyBitsySpyers [[The primary manager of the synthetic energon factories allows himself one day every two weeks. Blades has been on vacation for three months. He claims it's helping his nerves after all that flying.]] Bevel *Bevel has a sudden thought* Does my mom take vacation? VProwl It tops out at— You took off a day every /two weeks/? VProwl How can you take time off that frequently and yet have such short vacations? ... I answered my own question, didn't I. It's related, isn't it. ItsyBitsySpyers [[Your creator takes almost as few vacations as he d-- what? No. He doesn't go that often. That is a different mech.]] VProwl *rewinds the conversation a bit. the numbers threw him off too much to keep track of who they were talking about.* ... The manager, then. How can— How can the factory function with a manager that's so frequently absent? That's—criminal. SHOULD be criminal. ItsyBitsySpyers [[Besides, he himself gets plenty of time off. He attends multiple movie evenings a month, and there are the occasional interests calling him off-planet. And he regularly stays on your world, as you well know.]]
[[It is mostly automated. We also have far fewer citizens than you to fuel.]] VProwl That's outside of work. That's not—not whole days. Bevel Huh. ItsyBitsySpyers [[It keeps him satisfied.]]
[[And he /thought/ you were listening, Bevel.]] Bevel ...hard not to. ItsyBitsySpyers [[That excuse has never worked for him when caught and he's not going to let it pass for you.]] [[Try not to look at mechs from the corners of your optics when you're eavesdropping. Get a visor, if you must.]] Bevel ... *tada visor* *the grin is still visible tho* VProwl ... Sorry, were we trying to pretend that Bevel wasn't listening? ItsyBitsySpyers *Aha. His choice of distraction from the subject worked.*
[[Never.]] Bevel *giggles* VProwl *Anyway, with that subject resolved.* Is that— That can't be normal. Taking days off every couple of weeks? Any Autobot would be arrested for dereliction of duty, even at a slow point in the war. Bevel How many vacation days did you take during the war, Prowl? ItsyBitsySpyers *Damn it.*
[[It is now. Obviously, the war was a different story.]] VProwl ... Hold on. ItsyBitsySpyers *Curls the feeler tighter obediently.* VProwl Fiv— Pff. Thank you. Five million, eight hundred forty-one thousand, seven hundred and thirty-two. Counting voluntary vacation. Not being put on leave due to injuries. Bevel That is a lot of days. *tries to add up how many years that is* VProwl *harsh laugh* Optimus begs to differ. ItsyBitsySpyers [[.../Five million vacation days?/]] VProwl Yes? How many did you take? ItsyBitsySpyers *Soundwave holds up a finger as a request for patience while he combs through his files and does some adding.* VProwl *he's going to interpret that as a "hold on" and snake an arm around Soundwave's.* ItsyBitsySpyers *Soundwave huffs, is distracted by the contact, and has to start all over. Fortunately, he remembers where he was looking and it goes quicker the second time.*
[[The numbers might be slightly off - he's having to translate differences in 'day' between sectors of the galaxy and individual planets in solar systems to our time, you understand - but without full access to the attendance records, he believes it was... ten to seventeen?]] VProwl TEN DAYS?! Bevel ...it could be seventeen! *helpfully* ItsyBitsySpyers [[Exactly. Thank you, Bevel.]]
[[Yes. Three after the aqua planet encounter, and one of the truces with Scorponok was so dull he thought it safe to have one at the time.]] *Pause.* [[He was wrong, of course.]] VProwl TEN TO SEVENTEEN /DAYS/? Bevel Cybertron days? *she's really trying to give Soundwave the benefit of the doubt here* ItsyBitsySpyers [[Naturally.]]
[[...Yes? In case you've forgotten, the Autobots /did/ have your alternate on their side. And you've seen what he had to work with.]] [[Besides, nobody could do his job as well as him.]] VProwl There's such a thing as slow periods! Bevel *at least it wasn't Earth days* ItsyBitsySpyers [[Those were for taking advantage of other mechs' slothfulness and doing extra spying, maintenance, and installation work.]] VProwl Yes! And also vacations! Bevel Only if you are not Soundwave? ItsyBitsySpyers [[Exactly, Bevel.]]
[[The war was important. There was supposed to be plenty of time for them after it was over. And now others are having them.]] [[And so will he. As soon as he determines his destination.]] VProwl Maybe the war would have been shorter if you hadn't been—worked to exhaustion, apparently! Bevel *Bevel wonders how many vacation days Jazz took since he was apparently the Autobot version of Soundwave. With more talking* ItsyBitsySpyers [[It would have been shorter only because Megatron would have willingly followed a false Matrix straight into a sun, yelling at Optimus the entire way.]] *He's exaggerating, but given what happened on the aqua planet, not by much.* VProwl Sounds like a solution to me. ItsyBitsySpyers [[It didn't to him, at the time.]] VProwl Well. Maybe if you'd been better rested... Bevel *Bevel believes it, Soundwave* ItsyBitsySpyers [[He doubts that. It was willful ignorance on his part by then.]]
[[And now he grows very, very tired. So he will have the rest he never got.]]
*Or try to. He's still screaming himself awake, per Prowl's suggestion.* VProwl Studies have been done. After a vacation, workers are more rational, productive, and efficient, less ruled by emotions, better critical thinkers... Bevel So working less means you work better? ItsyBitsySpyers *Sounds fake, but okay.* Yesterday VProwl That's a gross and inaccurate oversimplification. ItsyBitsySpyers *He's gonna slowly unwind his feeler and stretch. It IS late.* VProwl It's like recharge. If you don't recharge your processor stops working correctly. ItsyBitsySpyers *GUESS WHO NEVER GOT ENOUGH RECHARGE DURING THE WAR EITHER* Bevel ...oh, but too much is bad too. I get it. *stands up* I get it and I think you both should go sleep or something because it is really late and I gotta do stuff. VProwl All right. *points at Soundwave.* At least six months. *and disappears. They can finish that discussion later.* ItsyBitsySpyers [[We'll negotiate.]]
*He nods to Bevel.* [[Thank you for the evening.]] *And off he goes.* Bevel *pings Prowl and Soundwave goodbye and gets back to work, like a workaholic*
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dachi-chan25 · 5 years
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So I clearly played myself *sigh* some of this books weren't what I expected and I still need to read a shit ton of sequels to series i fricken loved.
1.-Marked (House of Night #1) by PC Cast /Kirstin White
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So clearly I knew this book was gonna be silly and stuff, like it got me cringing so hard at all those 'not like the other girls' super speshul girl and it has low key a lot of cultural appropiation, so yeah, still was a really quick read and what the heck I'll try the next one to see if it gets better than this. I mean there has to be a reason why someone wants to turn this into a tv series right??
2.-Día de Muertos: Antología del cuento mexicano de V.A
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Realmente siento que es una antología muy inconexa, el título y la portada indican claramente una relación directa entre los relatos y el día de Muertos, sin embargo el espíritu de la festividad solo es capturado en un puñado de historias que es lo que me hizo dar tres estrellas al libro, porque aunque el resto de los cuentos no son malos siento que entraron a la antología con calzador pues no tenían nada que ver con día de muertos .
3.- Practical Magic by Alice Hoffman
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Ok, I did not disliked it, the book manages to be very atmospheric and really create some plausibility among all the whimsy but the characters were never really developed much?? And some were tragically underused (the Aunts) I just think the movie made the story/characters much better.
4.- Society of Wishes (Quartet of Wishes #1) by Elise Kova
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I had totally forgot I owned this book (I bought it cuz I knew the MC was a latina girl and yah) and well it is what it is, just a mess filled with hunky ass time wizards or some shit like that with barely any plot, development or much of anything really, definitely not reading the next ones.
5.-Hemlock Grove by Brian McGreevy
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I am heart broken, I wanted to like this book so badly, but it was all over the place imho, the narrative style was plain out confusing at times (like it threw me back to that time when I was a pretentious ass 15 yo trying to read Ulysses by James Joyce) and don't get me wrong I like writers who spice things up with the flow of their sentences like Chuck Palahniuk but I just couldn't get into it, I feel the series managed to tell this story in a much more organized and in depth fashion.
6.- Vampire Academy (Vampire Academy #1) by Richelle Mead
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I expected nothing of this, and I actually kinda enjoyed it because I think the book it's true to itself, it sets a tone from the beginning and doesn't deviate from it . Is it predictable? As fuck Is it full of every single trope under the sun? YUP, but it never pretends otherwise and it's fine (also I am a thot for vampires so idc) I will continue this series.
7.-Battle Royale by Koshun Takami
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I LOVED it, I had watched the movie, but oh boy it doesn't build the characters the way the book does. It's brutal, dynamic full of optimism even in such a hopless horrific situation. The only thing that kinda had me in stiches was the fact that nearly every damn female character wanted to get it on with Shuuya.
8.- Tale of the Body Thief (Vampire Chronicles #4) by Anne Rice
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This is my frist re-read of this book and damn, Lestat is truly a himbo, he just makes the most idiotic desisions and then is upset because they come to bite him in the ass but he is also kinda charming so what the hell?? David, poor summer child he really thought Lestat would respect his desision 😂😂 this is a real fun book (I mean the whole ass discussion about Faust is as fake deep as u can get) and it really drives home how much of a hot mess is Lestat. (Also Louis u bitch!!! How dare u betray him it's not like u had tried to kill him before multiple times xD honestly Lestat's logic)
9.-The Graveyard Book by Neil Gaiman
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I adored this, the atmosphere Neil created in this book is absolutely beautiful, every detail and character Bod meets in the cementary adds so much to a rather simple story, the world building, the sense of magical realism it's just something I always appreciate in Neil's books, this really has become one of my faves and I will try and re-read this very soon.
10.-Dracul by Dacre Srocker
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I was on the fence about this one, like Dracula is one of my all time favorite books, and when I found out his great grand nephew was writing a precuel of Bram's most famous work I felt it was an easy money-grab scheme but then I heard a lot of positive reviews and people started talking how this book gives a back story to one of Dracula's brides and that it was based on some notes Bram left behind I decided to try it, and I don't regret it. I mean it wasn't what I expected, the book is more historical fiction and Dacre tries perharps a little too hard to emulate Bram's writing style/structure but the plot really managed to trap me and it was quite an intresting story.
11.-Bone Music by Christopher Rice
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This is the frist book I read from him (like even tho I like her books a lot i don't fucks with Anne Rice cuz she is awful to anyone who critisizes her books or tries to write fanfic of em so yeah I wasn't so keen in reading her son's work) but it was a very pleasant surprise, those twist he makes at the very beginning of the book left me gaping like a fish, I was emotionally involved with the characters and I definitely look forward to read more books on the Burning Girl series.
12.- Final Girls - Riley Sager
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Slashers are some of my favorite things in the world, and this book gets a lot of the tropes/atmosphere right and still, manages to be original and deconstruct them, turn the reader on his expectations and deliver a great ending, will definitely continue with the series.
13- Hidden Bodies by Caroline Kepnes
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Joe Goldberg is a punk ass bitch and I hope the ending stays as it was, like how lucky is this bastard, and at one point I was like, no way are all this people around him so dumb likeeeeeee he is such an unreliable narrator that idk if the things he say are really happening or all is part of his self important delusional mind, I really liked this sequel even if Joe barely struggled until the end (he was living the Life u guys) it was a fun read.
14- The Mysterious Affair at Styles by Agatha Christie
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This is Hercule Poirot's frist book, and he is so different from the books I have read, but still brilliant and with his quirks, it really captured me, I always enjoy a good murder mystery and Agatha Christie always delivers.
15.- The Girl who Loved Tom Gordon by Stephen King
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King is back in my good graces, this book is terrifying it really takes u along Trisha's emotional journey, all the desperation, the defeat,the hope, really is such a complex beautiful emotional ride of this amazingly brave little girl, and damn Stephen u can write female character's well y u wrote that mess in Bag of Bones like whyyy dude? ?? I simply loved this one, made me cry so much.
16.-#Murdertrending by Gretchen McNeil
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This was such a fun dynamic read, I finished it in one sitting. The whole concept of Alcatraz 2.0 was pretty darn great, the painiacs, ahhh so good, I wished the rest of the characters apart from Dee were more developed but I know it would have given the plot twist away if they had so it's fine, I am really looking forward to reading Murderfunding.
That was it, my reads were either meh or omgggg I loved it!!! I hope this months my reads are all good.
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emilyelysesmith · 7 years
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Halloween
I’ve seen tons of lists of Halloween stuff floating around on Pinterest, but they’re so basic, like “Drink a pumpkin spice latte” or “Play in the leaves” or “Carve pumpkins.” Those are so obvious, and we are def going to do them (except for the latte), but what about books, movies, and TV shows? I made a more detailed list to supplement the basic fall fun lists. Also, please also see the end of this post for a list with my personal commentary, which can be annoying for some people, so I’ve included the pure list first. 
Criminal podcast, episode 71: “A Bump in the Night” 
Lore podcast (any episode, but I like episode 3: “The Beast Within,” and episode 8: “The Castle”)
Get Out movie
Flannery O’Connor short stories
Agatha Christie books (any of them, but I’m partial to anything with Detective Poirot)
Hocus Pocus movie
Edgar Allen Poe short stories and poems
Goosebumps books by R. L. Stine
Pumpkin caramel blondies recipe
Toasted pumpkin seeds recipe
Agatha Christie’s Poirot TV show, episode Hallowe’en Party (currently on Netflix)
Pretty Little Liars TV Show (currently on Netflix and Hulu)
http://rainymood.com/
Wishbone TV Show, episode Frankenbone
The Witches by Roald Dahl
The Office TV show, season 2, episode 5, “Halloween,” and season 7, episode 6, “Costume Contest” (currently on Netflix)
The Sixth Sense movie (currently on Netflix)
The Crucible by Arthur Miller 
The Crucible movie (currently on Netflix)
Over the Garden Wall TV show (currently on Hulu)
It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown! TV special
The Nightmare before Christmas movie (currently on Netflix)
Coraline by Neil Gaiman
Coraline movie (currently on Netflix)
The Graveyard Book by Neil Gaiman
Once Upon a Time TV Show, season 1 (currently on Netflix)
Spirited Away movie
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban movie
Harper’s Island TV Show (available on Amazon)
The Legend of Sleepy Hollow short story by Washington Irving
Frankenstein by Mary Shelley
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Disclaimer: I am a wimp who can’t handle too much scariness. This list is probably incredibly mild for a lot of people. But I’m planning to continue to add to this list, and if you have any suggestions, comment and I might probably add them. And I’ll try to do a yearly update on this list. Yes, I know it is shameful that I didn’t include anything for Alfred Hitchcock and Stephen King, but I haven’t gotten around to them. Maybe I’ll get some of their stuff on the list by next year. Also, I know I didn’t include any music. So if someone makes me a cool playlist or something I’ll stick it on here.
Criminal podcast, episode 71: “A Bump in the Night” (Criminal is a great podcast, and some other eps could give you the creeps. This one creeped me out the most.)
Lore podcast (any episode, but I like episode 3: “The Beast Within,” and episode 8: “The Castle”)
Get Out movie (No, I haven’t actually seen this. But it’s on my list for this Halloween)
Flannery O’Connor short stories (Southern gothic fix, you’re welcome)
Agatha Christie books (any of them, but I’m partial to anything with Detective Poirot; her most popular novels include And Then There Were None and Murder on the Orient Express)
Hocus Pocus movie (Yeah, classic, had to include it.)
Edgar Allen Poe short stories and poems
Goosebumps books by R. L. Stine (A couple years ago my friends and I decided to read this in preparation for Halloween, and it was so fun and hilarious. We also ended up watching some of the old TV series and one of the TV movies on Netflix that was actually pretty good. I know R. L. Stine has a bunch of other books, but I’ve never read them)
Pumpkin caramel blondies recipe (This one is vetted by me. It’s my favorite fall treat.)
Toasted pumpkin seeds recipe
Agatha Christie’s Poirot TV show, episode Hallowe’en Party (currently on Netflix) (These are really long and kinda slow. They’re worth it though. And they’re great to put on Sunday afternoon for naps.)
Pretty Little Liars TV Show (currently on Netflix and Hulu) (Stop watching after the first A is revealed. Seriously, don’t waste your time. I think that’s in season 3.)
http://rainymood.com/
Wishbone TV Show, episode Frankenbone (Scared me as a kid, so I had to include it)
The Witches by Roald Dahl
The Office TV show, season 2, episode 5, “Halloween,” and season 7, episode 6, “Costume Contest” (currently on Netflix; there are other Halloween episodes, but often Halloween is only in the intro rather than throughout the whole episode)
The Sixth Sense movie (currently on Netflix)
The Crucible by Arthur Miller
The Crucible movie (currently on Netflix)
Over the Garden Wall TV show (currently on Hulu; such a weird little show with a Halloween feel)
It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown! TV special (CLASSIC)
The Nightmare before Christmas movie (currently on Netflix; I can’t ever decide whether this is a Christmas or Halloween movie. Someone convince me it’s Christmas and I’ll maybe take it off the list. Right now it is both to me.)
Coraline by Neil Gaiman
Coraline movie (currently on Netflix)
The Graveyard Book by Neil Gaiman
Once Upon a Time TV Show, season 1 (currently on Netflix; OK so maybe this just gives me the fall feels because I watched the first season when it came out in the fall, but it’s got magic and witches and such, so it’s here)
Spirited Away movie (Different take on your ghost story)
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban movie (Like all of HP could be considered Halloween-ish, but this is the best movie. I also recommend all of the illustrated versions of the book (they are almost always released in October)
Harper’s Island TV Show (available on Amazon) (This is probably the scariest show on here. It’s like a modern And Then There Were None, and it’s incredibly disturbing.)
The Legend of Sleepy Hollow short story by Washington Irving
Frankenstein by Mary Shelley
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