#i cannot to all of that while learning how to do billing as well

[jinkiezzsstuff]

In Season

alastor x doe! femreader

no but really this is actually so depraved and smutty i cannot believe myself i hope yall enjoy the feast xx

Summary: You were aquatinted with hell for quite some time and you quickly learned as much as you could about mating season to protect yourself from other deer sinners. Although you came across the hotel and neither you nor Alastor could resist each other, and your instincts.

Warnings: 18+ Minors DNI, female anatomy- no pronouns, no descriptions of bodytype/skin colour/hair type, heavy breeding kink, female masturbation briefly, penetration, squirting, creampie, horrorish aspects predator n prey, ‘in heat’ trope, OOC alastor bc y’know sex, general vulgarity, brief mention of blood, swearing, not proofread, LEMME KNOW WHAT I MISSED

Word count: 5K

You’ve been in Hell several years, and at first it was a little jarring. Especially since you now had hooves, a tail, a black scent-sensitive nose, and soft floppy ears. Honestly it was amusing getting used to your new body while dodging sinners hungry for new meat, you reminisced on your first days of hell often, as they were the most exciting.

But now you were more aware, you’d spent a majority of your time in hell assessing and attempting to understand the whole eternal damnation thing- after all you weren’t much of a believer in hell when alive. You kept atop all the sinners that were of note, the different sectors of the pentagram, the overlords as well as their strengths and weaknesses that coincides with their demonic form, you also paid close attention to all the rings of hell and their sins. You’d even grown interested in the hellbors and imps, never imagining how birth and life things that was supposed to be god's gift, ended up breeding in such a foul place like hell.

Most demons spawned into hell with some sort of form be it an object like a television, a prop like a doll, a toy such as a jack in the box, or more commonly an animal. Most humans found themselves attached to animals anyways which made sense as to why many showed up as one, as well as why it wasn't surprising to see many dogs and cats as a common form in hell. During your investigative research, you ran into a few.. hurdles.

Bucks, mating seasons. It seemed like all animal life here was cursed with some sort of violent mating season. Where all that sinners could think about doing was mating. Bucks had been your biggest issue in hell, you found it pretty simple to ignore mating seasons, focusing your mind anywhere but the burning in your pelvis, but the bucks would storm around looking for the smell of the doe near them.

It’s a pain in the ass and you always had your calendars marked, alarms and reminders set, as to not forget that mating season was coming and you needed to take precautions.

Besides the chase the bucks would give you every year, you had it pretty easy in hell, you published on a blog your findings marketing it to new sinners in hell, kind of like a guide to hell, and that kept your bills paid and your mind occupied.

~

Walking down the road in the pentagram city with the intentions of snapping some pictures of some of the expected violence in hell, you gazed along the different brick walls and shops, shopping with your eye at times. You came by yet another brick wall, this one littered with taped up signs, your paced slowed as your eyes rapidly moved across the words on different pages.

There were varying signs, one for resale value drugs, IMP immediate murder professionals, and Charlie Morningstars Hazbin Hotel. Pausing your stride you went up to the wall getting a closer look at the shitty drawn piece of paper, there was several different… characters, on it very poorly drawn. You recognize Charlie’s name of course, you’d often see her roaming around the pride ring actually, unlike her father who you never saw.

Pulling out your phone you snapped a picture of the sign and decided to take a trip down to that side of the pentagram to check out this hotel. It’s definitely quite the story to be told that’s for sure.

You made left, rights, had to take cover for thirty minutes while some sinners duked it out shooting up a whole block, then you tried to hail down a cab- failed and trudged for the longest time to the hotel. It was so much further than you anticipated but everytime you felt like turning back you told yourself you were almost there which got you to the door of the hotel, by the end of the day however.

Knocking on the giant doors you didn’t know whether to walk in like you would a hotel, or wait for a guide. Tapping your fingers against your thighs you’re suddenly hit with strong arousal that clawed suddenly at your abdomen.

Bringing your phone up from your pocket you checked the date, you knew the season was changing and autumn was here but you didn’t have any issues with buck recently so you didn’t really have to worry. You did confirm mating season was in progress, with the conformations laying within the calendar, but it shouldn’t have been a problem, unless there is a buck inside the hotel.

Suddenly the door flew open and you were pulled away from your contemplation by a high pitched, giddy voice tugging your attention toward it. “Oh my gosh, hi! I’m Charlie! Come in! Are you here for the hotel!” The blonde rambled quickly, tugging you in by your wrist.

The hotel was weirdly homey, you could tell that there were different personalities that occupied the space, different colours of reds decorated, random items littered around the room like stiletto boots by the door, a large pile of needles in a corner, the bar seemed to be its own aesthetic design. It was comfortably warm and smelt like an active fireplace, as well as something so strong and musky it made your legs inadvertently clench.

You attempt to hold your instincts inside but this wasn’t like any other buck you’ve smelt before- it made you ravenous. Pulling yourself together while Charlie spoke about the hotel you pondered what you’d say, you could exactly be like, is there a male buck here because i’m horny as fuck.

No. Smiling to Charlie tiredly, you finally ready yourself to give her the explanation. “This place really is lovely, I didn’t actually come to be a patron but maybe write something about it for the little blog thing i have.” You felt jittering and lightheaded as you spoke, your eyes scanning the room and ears pulled back. “Uhm would it be okay to stay for a night?”

Charlie perked up clasping her hands together nodding eagerly. “Of course to both~!” She sang out happily. “I am so glad some people are interested! Who knows, maybe after a day you’ll wanna stay!” She exclaimed, twirling around happily.

You smiled at her optimism and you were genuinely happy that the princess of hell was such a breath of fresh air in the smog filled hell you all lived in. “Do you want me to show you around? Meet our staff and guests?” Charlie asked, a glimmer of hope and excitement sparkling in her eye. You took a brief moment to ponder before nodding your head. “I think that would be perfect, then though would i be able to rest, the walk fucked my hooves.” You say tapping the tip of your booted hoof against the floor.

Interlocking your elbows Charlie nodded, dragging you toward the bar. “Of course you can, I'll end our tour with your room, but let me begin it with Husk! Our loyal bartender!” Walking toward the bar you’d spotted early on, the cat demon turned his head ever so slightly toward you. “Hi,” The alcoholic said flatly, Charlie laughed nervously, but you didn’t really mind his demeanour you preferred short and to the point.

“Hey Husk, nice to meet you.” The cat grunted at you, and gave you a sorta glare. “Another deer. Course it fuckin is.” Husk muttered to himself bitterly, Charlie scolded him under her breath, before turning to you with a grin and a shrug of the shoulders. “He’s sweet once ya get to know him. Heh, anyways c’mon lets meet Angel!”

After about thirty minutes of running around you met all but one of the members residing within the hotel. As you skipped around the hotel you entirely forgot about the low grade heat buzzing between your legs, you were used to it after all, and you enjoyed yourself a lot, confessing to Charlie that you particularly enjoyed the rambunctious Nifty and flirty Angel.

“Alright, the last person of note is one of the most important. He’s been assisting in the hotel basically since the start, half of it wouldn’t be possible without him.” Charlie explained walking up to a door, on it had two different do not disturb signs. A large wood one nailed right on the door, and a second hanging off the handle.

Charlie picked the sign from its hanging position humming while examining it. “He’s never had these before.” She muttered, voice filled with confusion, however you were lost in a daze. This was the smell you could pick up down stairs, he must’ve been a buck, there wasn’t any other way.

The scent was pungent, nearly knocking you off your heels with arousal, it was musky, something only described as sweaty and primal. The natural hormones of the demon beyond the door were unlike anything you’ve experienced before; it was like he was a starved man, hungrier than ever and more than ready to breed.

It was dirty and you felt embarrassed at the reaction you were having, typically you had a low hum and no real desire to attempt to have sex with one of the many deer demons who came after you so this was a bit of a new experience. And it was nearly painful, you don’t even know the guy and yet it felt like you were being consumed by him.

“Hm, wait here I’ll go ask Nifty! She normally knows the most,” Charlie drifted off tilting her head at you. “You okay there?” She asked nervously, you promptly nod at that, inwardly cursing yourself for not being more controlled. “Yeah,” You quickly clear your throat trying to play off the lust filled tone for a dry throat. “Yes,” You say with more conviction. “Sorry it’s been a long day. Before you head off, would this guy happen to also be a deer?”

Charlie grinned super wide, purely whites on display. “He is! Best for last! I think you two will be happy to have each other haha,” She chuckled a little awkwardly, brushing her hair behind her ear. She shook her head, swiftly bidding you ado and walking off to find Nifty.

You waited a moment listening for anything down the halls, but you didn’t hear anything anywhere, and you couldn’t see anybody around, nor could you see cameras hidden in the corner. Walls crashing down, heart rate naturally kicking up; you unbuttoned your pants, spreading your legs and slipping your hand down your pants.

You whimpered at the contact of your cold fingers to your clit, feeling the sticky sensation of arousal cover the bit of thigh that your underwear didn’t touch. You soaked yourself just by the smell of the deer on the other side of the door. You slipped your middle finger and ring finger down, coating your fingers entirely before slipping them into you, curling them as you did.

You inhaled deeply resting your free arm against the door above your head for you to lean forward on, you didn’t have the intentions of fucking your self in the hall, but one thrust turned into three. Now you’re dripping, gasping for air and trying to keep yourself quiet when all you wanted to do was collapse and beg whoever occupied the other side of the door to please fuck the neediness out of you.

As you quickened your pace, your body quivered from the uncomfortable position, but you halted everything when you heard the unmistakable sound of a radio on the other side of the door. It was a gritty sound, garbled with no real sound coming out of it, just strange static. You tried to catch your breath as you listened closely, checking your left and right speedily ro assure you were still alone.

Suddenly the doorknob shifted the door falling open under your weight. Your legs stuttered attempting to catch your body, hand whipping out from inside you, slick and sticky with your arousal as if you were some whore. Unfortunately you weren’t able to catch yourself fast enough but lessened the brunt of the fall with your knees before your hands came down to finish. You were still in a blitzed out haze, but the room was pitch black, the only sound that could be heard was an ambient sound of nature and the faintest sound of the radio.

The only light that you were blessed with was the hall light from the opened door behind you. You could barely make out deer heads hung on the wall and a red couch before the door snapped shut leaving you alone in the darkness.

You whimpered, clenching your legs and your teeth, you could still hear the radio but it sounded like it was seriously messed up, switching stations, pitches and incorporating sounds you’d never heard from a radio, like growls and deep rumblings.

Your fear mixed with desire and the smell of lust was far more palpable in this room. It was so much harder to ignore the scent and the smell of the buck who was definitely worked up in this room. “What a depraved little doe you are.” You jumped at the voice, nothing like you expected. He sounded wicked, dark, and surprisingly, hornier than you.

You could now hear him in the room with you, his deep pants, the footsteps around, you swear you could’ve heard him accidentally hit his antler against something as well, it was like he just materialised. “What’re you doing out of bed so late? You do know how filthy bucks can be this time of year, don’t you.”

You yelped as two bright red eyes appeared just a few feet in front of you, either this guy was crouched or contorted as you never stood from the floor. As his eyes got closer to you, his being consumed you entirely, as it dawned on you that he was crawling toward you like a goddamn animal.

“Sorry.” You meekly whimpered, tilting your head back ever so slightly, neck on display for him. He let out a baritone chuckle, shocking you slightly, before he replaced that shock with a new-by pouncing on top of you.

He brought his face closer to yours, the crazily dialed eyes of his illuminating your face enough for him to properly see and observe your face. You however only got brief glimpses of a strained yellow smile, and messy red hair that stuck to his face from sweat. You could feel his body heat against you making your own body feel hotter by the second, his right hand sat above your head, his other grabbed ahold of the wrist that moments ago was deep inside you.

One of his knees sat outside of your body by your thigh, while the other knee occupied the inner thigh too close to your core for comfort, or perhaps not close enough. All you knew is this deer was one of the horniest you’ve ever come across, his breath was erratic chest heaving, breath tickling your face and neck, his eyes were blown and obviously a firey red bright enough to add a horror-esque ambience.

You could feel the strain he had against his suit pants, it was hard not to when in the position he took he was straddling one of your thighs. He gripped your hand harder bringing it up to his face, your heart pounding in your ribcage as you watched motionlessly.

He groaned at the sight of your still wet fingers, his smile stretching just slightly as his eyes momentarily closed. Then his mouth opened, as did his eyes, teasingly he opened his mouth bringing your fingers up to him, before he took a hold with his mouth swirling his long tongue around your digits. You whined, closing your eyes at the feeling, the way he did it was not just in an attempt to be pornographic but to properly taste you, coating his taste buds with your arousal. Pulling his mouth away with an exasperated groan, he dragged his sharp teeth along your flesh, leaving tiny cuts that exuded just enough blood to satiate his desire.

He pulled himself away properly, saliva stringing as he did. You peaked your eyes open, as suddenly a feeling of being sucked into the floor consumed you and you felt like screaming. Though it all happened too fast that you weren’t able to squeak anything out; the floor sucked you in and within seconds spit you out. Gently your body bounced against soft velvet comforters on what you assumed was a bed- his bed. Still surrounded by only the blackened room, the buck nowhere you could see, you sat there heart pounding, bewildered, scared and horny, a unique combination to be fair.

“Tell me, my dear doe. When was the last time you gave into such, primal desires?” The man’s voice appeared before he did, sliding up beside you from the shadows. “Never.” You whisper looking into his deepened red eyes. “I am so sorry. I avoid bucks, I came for business- I didn’t- god i’m sorry i couldn’t help myself- you fuckin,” You threw your head back groaning in frustration, feeling embarrassed to admit you were just about willing to do anything he said if it meant he spread you out and bred you.

He chuckled demonically, his hand sticking out to you. “Alastor, sweetheart, pleasure to meet you, quite, the pleasure.” Alastor’s radio voice lowered and he purred to you so sultry that you clenched your thighs together. Grasping his larger clawed hand that he had stuck out, you shook him tightly enjoying the warmth and contact. “YN, pleasure to meet you too.”

Gently pulling his hand away, Alastor inched his way closer to you, leaning over he placed his hand on the other side of your torso seemingly trying to resume the position he held on the floor. “I could smell you enter the hotel, you know. I keep myself away every season and no other passer by, has been an issue. So what is it that you’ve done my dear,” Alastor questioned accusingly while dragging a claw up your neck and getting back to being on top of you.

Alastor felt like he couldn’t help himself, he felt a yearning for sex he’d not felt ever, sure there’s been the occasional session with his hand on a particularly trying mating season, but never real feral need like this. He wanted to leave his mark on you, and keep all those other foul deer demons that may attempt to take their claim on you in the future.

Growling radio admission and static echoed throughout the room, Alastor promptly closed the inches between your bodies, gently collapsing on top of you. Alastor dragged his tongue up your neck from your collar to your jaw line, ending his travel with an opened mouth kiss. You whimpered at the sensation of his body against you clutching his shirt, as he nipped at your neck with his sharp teeth drawing blood.

His thigh was pressed against your core with the way he leant down on you, and you wondered if he could feel how you were pulsing desperately begging him to fill you. Against your will you jerked up grinding yourself into him, causing him to groan at the own pleasure he got from the friction. Alastor then pulled away entirely looking down at you, then a gentle red light flickered on, then another, and finally a third, lighting the room up with a reddish glow.

You weren’t focused on how, or where the light came from, but rather the man in front of you. You had no clue it was Alastor, as in thee overlord Alastor, although you should’ve put it together based on all the radio feedback that sounded from out of him. Of course you knew of him from your research but he’d been gone when you came down so you easily forgot him.

Alastor was dishevelled, without a suit coat, just a button up and his suit pants, his hair was a mess as you briefly saw before, but man oh man did he look a wreck. He was sweaty, his antlers were out on full display, his eyes lidded.

“I had no idea you were a deer.” You say eyeing him up and down, he chuckled at that. “So you know of me?” The question, you might almost say, sounded uncertain, perhaps before with the lights off lended the two of you a comfortable anonymity that you don’t have anymore. Nodding your head you can’t help but attempt to gain some friction between your legs. “Darling if you truly want this as much as I, then I'd be more than happy to satiate the hunger for both of us- so long as we see to a date and several others after. I wouldn’t be able to stand seeing you with another deer after me.”

Although this formal speech was out of place for your current predicament you looked past it because you wouldn’t mind this being more than a one time hook up. “Of course, I hate one night stands.” Smiling at him, his smile softened compared to its harsher one before. Alastor moved in, this time you were able to watch him in the dim light, leaning back fully and off your elbows, you got comfortable on the soft pillow that kept you somewhat propped up.

You wanted your hands free to touch him, and hold him. When his face was inches from you, lips barely touching, your hands came up to play with his hair. You go cautiously hearing rumours about the distaste he has for contact he doesn’t initiate, however the moment your hands connect to his hot neck, he moans, pushing himself down to connect to your lips.

He smiled through, as you expected him to, but it was the best kiss you’ve ever had, purely based on how intense he was once he finally got a taste of you. You just barely opened your mouth before his tongue was escaping his mouth to explore yours, it was a searing kiss one that was unique to anything before. His body once again lowered as he relaxed on top of you, most of his weight rested on you, which you loved the feeling of it was like he was encasing you with him.

You could feel the stiff hard on that ached to be freed, and his uneven breaths that expanded his chest further into yours, like a tide your chests pushed and pulled each other in and out. It was erotic, and as your make out session dragged on the messier it got, teeth scraping tongues fighting, saliva glistening on the perimeter of both of your mouths. Your hands dug into his hair occasionally touching his long antlers that were out, and everytime you did he’d moan statically into your mouth.

Alastor cared little about his poise and instead chased his own pleasure as his mouth entangled with yours, you were receptive and as needy as he was, so he felt no shame when he started to hump himself against your core. He took even more pleasure in hearing you whine for more, bucking up into him. You buttons were still undone from earlier which made him feel a sense of anger he couldn’t explain, he wanted to be the one to make you come undone, he wish he could’ve gotten to you before you fucked yourself against his door.

So with a new goal in the demons mind, he snaked his arm in between your bodies, him needing to lift himself a bit to do so, and snuck his hand down you pants straight to your soaking wet core. Gasping at the contact you jerked up into his hand, his fingers sliding down the length of you leaving no area untouched.

“Impatient?” Alastor mocked pulling away finally, although he was in no place to, as even the simplest word came out jagged and out of breath. “Alastor please,” You begged unable to stop the way you jerked up into the warmth of his hand.

With contemplative hum Alastor halted all movement making you groan. It was unbearable to put up with, perhaps the foreplay of it all would be more enjoyable if it wasn’t such a painful lust you were in. Snapping his fingers, cool washed over your body like freezer air, and soon you realized you were left bare.

You jumped curling into yourself afraid of being so suddenly exposed. Looking up you were surprised to find the overlord himself nude with you, the comforter that once laid flat underneath you now pulled up behind him. Leaning forward blanket following in suit behind him, you simply stared at him, the markings on his body, the fact he had two tone skin, and of course the more obvious aspect of his body, the fact he was hung.

Covering the two of you under the safety of the blanket, Alastor pulled your legs apart gently, body slotting back where it’s supposed to be in between your legs. “You’re devine torture my dear. Attempting to be somewhat gentlemenly in a state like this, when you’re so desperate, is absolute torture.” Alastor grit out, his static gone as he struggled against the animalistic urge to dive into you.

Breathing out a breath you had no clue you were holding, you begged him pressing your body up into his. Thoughtlessly you reached down between you two, wrapping your legs around his torso to nudge him closer, and slowly you wrapped your fingers around him making him almost robotically crackle.

Giving him a few awkward strokes, due to your position, you guided him towards your entrance that needed no prep, with how you pulsed aching, and dripped greedily you weren’t too worried about pain.

Alastor barely took your guidance, as once you stroked him a twig snapped, when you lined him up to your entrance, he jerked forward plunging into you rather harshly causing your body to jolt. A heat shot through your body crawling down your pelvis straight to your toes, while your jaw hung open, unable to make the noise. Alastors radio was popping and crackling as he fucked into you, grinding his body against your own, he was pouring himself into you as fast as he could and for him it still wasn’t fast enough.

Meanwhile you were still attempting to catch up, your brain hazily lagging behind as your body jerked along with every thrust. You could feel yourself dripping down the length of him, the wet slapping of skin was just more indication you were practically a faucet. Reaching upward to grab onto his neck, it was your turn to growl viciously, loving the way his eyes and smile looked in this fucked out haze.

Grinning at him you tilted your head back, eyes closed at the insane pace Alastor was attempting. “Fuck Al, just like that please don’t fuckin stop,” You moan spreading your legs further apart so your clit was more exposed to his flesh that came slapping down.

One of his hands grasped your neck lightly squeezing, you clenched in tandem with his choking, absolutely loving the feeling of him having you at his mercy. “Who knew such a sweet face would be so, filthy.” Alastor said through a toothy smile his radio voice was gone only leaving his strained raw vocals.

You let out wails of pleasure as he fucked you into the mattress, before you roughly pulled Alastors head down forcing him to give you a kiss. Your tongues met before your lips did as neither of you were going in for gentle but rather a greedy taste of one another.

Alastor moaned and whimpered more when kissing you seemingly without hesitation, making you feel closer to the edge then before. Arching your body up you clawed Alastors back begging him, tears threatening to spill and the feeling of need. “Please Alastor, please fuck- so good it’s gonna- i’m gonna cum- Al don’t stop,” You cried loudly stumbling over what you wanted to say as you felt hot all over.

Above you Alastor could barely hold on, his forehead rested against you as you cried, wailing for him to fuck you begging for him to make you cum, and he knew from how you cried for him, ge was gonna. He also knew he wasn’t far himself feeling as you clenched and leaked all over the bed, it was disgusting and he loved it. Your skin stuck to his as his body came crashing down on yours legs too shaky to hold him himself up, but his pace didn’t let up all that much still forcing himself deep into you, marking every inch of you.

You screamed, clawing his back wrapping your arms around him as you convulsed. You whined about how it was so good how hard you were coming but it got mixed up in his mind as he focused on the violent gushes of liquid that rushed out of you. It seemed your orgasm kept being pulled out as you continued to gush around him making him bellow out his own praises of how good you felt, how glad he was you were coming on his cock and making a wet mess of his bed.

Alastor was ravenous as he used your cunt to milk him of everything he had trying hard to get himself as deep as possible in you. Meanwhile you continued to moan and whine at him your orgasm still pushing on gushes is liquid squirting out of you as your sentive mating body wanted more, wanted to be bred and was ready to hold out to do so.

And bred it was, Alastor bit onto you as he came, loving the feeling of filling you to the brim, it wasn’t anything he’d done or felt before. You groaned, smiling wickedly and you hungrily kissed up his neck pulling his ear with your teeth, whispering to him about how badly you wanted to be filled with his cum, eyes rolling back as he stilled in you finally.

Your body ceased a bit before his movement ceased, It was all insanely animalistic. Now as Alastor laid on top of you, still inside you, you felt the post nut clarity truly hit you. You were still in a lustful haze, however you’d never been that much with a man, nevermind one you haven’t properly met. Although you didn’t mind, as you dragged your fingers through his sweaty hair you reminded yourself he wanted to see you more, not just use you.

Taking a deep breath, Alastor enjoyed the smell of your skin and the doe pheromones you naturally let off. In the back of his mind twisted questions that he couldn’t bother trying to answer. His head laid under your chin, face between your breasts dazed and staring off into space. You cautiously traced your fingers up his ears, his antlers fell in size back to little sticks. His ears twitched but he made no remark as you gently played with them.

“Do you regret it?” You broke the silence with the nasty feeling of worry in your gut, worry that you messed up, worried you both made a mistake. Alastor let out a long hum, his radio frequencies back in action as he did. “No dear not at all. Lust or not I was certain about my decision. I had the strength to hold back when I heard you on the other side of the door but I didn’t want to.” Alastor admits still a little coy is his delivery.

Although he did a very good job at assuring you because any doubt you had vanished. It was a vulnerable time for the both of you, during mating season, that having the knowledge that he still could’ve kept control, kept himself on the other side of the door but instead choose to claim you, yeah made your heart and mind content.

[hsllfirescoopsreblogs]

˚.✦.˳·˖✶ ⋆.✧̣̇˚.✦.˳·˖✶ ⋆.✧̣̇˚.✦.˳·˖✶ ⋆.✧̣̇˚. ✦.˳·˖✶ ⋆.✧̣̇˚.✦

「 ✦ joel miller 2 ✦ 」

╰┈➤ 18+ none of these stories belong to me! this is a masterlist of all joel miller stories i’ve read and reblogged! just thought it would be nice to have them all in one spot! (if your fic is on here and you wish not to be, please let me know!) some will have summaries if provided <3

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MASTERLIST ✿ PEDRO PASCAL CHARACTERS ✿ 4/25/24

✿ joel miller 1

✿ @tightjeansjavi

➥ who do you belong to mr. miller?

»You get jealous seeing the women in Jackson throw themselves at Joel. You decide to give him a gentle reminder of who he belongs to.

➥ the feel of coldness only water brings

»you convince Joel to join you for a swim in a lake while on patrol despite his insecurities

✿ @egcdeath

➥ how the cookie crumbles

»when you come back home to austin to help your sister with her bakery, you end up in an arrangement with your high school crush that ends up being far more than you bargained for. 

✿ @punkshort

➥ i’ll be home for christmas

»Having just caught your fiancé cheating on you, you decide to come back home from the big city to Austin for the month of December to try to figure out your next step. You had no idea you would be getting more than you bargained for with the handsome single dad who built your parents' house.

➥ i know who you are

»A fall on patrol causes you to lose your long term memory, forgetting the identities of your friends and loved ones. You have to learn all over again how to survive in a post-apocalyptic world, and you learn things about yourself along the way.

✿ @auteurdelabre

➥ something to fight for

»After a disastrous blind date you decide to stay away from the miserable Joel Miller forever. The only problem is your best friend Maria is dating his brother and their construction company has been hired to renovate where you work. In an effort to support your friend, you’re thrust into the unwanted job of babysitting Joel’s young daughter one night. As time goes on you’re not expecting to find a confidant in Joel Miller but when you do, you wonder how you ever survived without him.

✿ @joelscurls

➥ best kept secret

»In an attempt to keep your relationship secret, Joel agrees to a blind date set up by his best friend / your father. You don't take it well.

✿ @alrightieaphroditie

➥ sweet creature

»an anthology of those little moments within your relationship with joel miller.

✿ @undercoverpena

➥ be good, be quiet

»bill tells you both you're sleeping in separate rooms when a thunderstorm doesn't allow you to leave. but joel isn't planning on getting any sleep.

✿ @dancingtotuyo

➥ high infidelity

»Tommy gets himself into more trouble than he can get out of.

✿ @chaotic-iguana

➥ borrowed time

»Reader gets hurt, and Joel doesn’t know how to deal with it. (no-outbreak! au)

✿ @palioom

➥ toolbox

»when joel comes back home from work to pick up the toolbox he forgot, he finds a surprise in the form of you in bed with a vibrator and just cannot tear his eyes away from you.

✿ @fooled-around-and-fell

➥ pretty like this

»you found a dress in a cabin during patrol and brought it back home. joel doesn't know why you're suddenly acting odd around him, then he sees you wearing the dress.. and fuck you look beautiful.

✿ @strang3lov3

➥ brain scramblies pt2

»Bubbly and sweet Reader slips and falls at Tommy and Maria’s anniversary party, hitting her head hard on the floor. Tommy tasks Joel, her grumpy patrol partner, with getting her home safe. In her dazed state, she spills to Joel how she really feels about him! Basically two idiots dancing around their feelings for each other.

✿ @endlessthxxghts

➥ dr. miller

➥ best i ever had

»Someone tries to hit on you on your night out with Joel, insulting your man in the process, and oh you don't like that. You blow off some steam in more ways than one.

✿ @penvisions

➥ by the grit of sandpaper

»Joel Miller is a gruff as they come, the world having changed him for the worst. But settling in Jackson with his brother changed him for the better. He's known around town as someone to help, whether it be with home repairs, construction, and hand carved trinkets. An offhand comment from you inspires him to branch out and create helpful kitchen wares. And it seems everyone has been gifted one from him, except for you. It makes you rethink the casual friendship you had developed with the man that had just begun to expand beyond patrols.

✿ @yeollie-plz

➥ light the flame pt2

»Your mom moves the two of you back to Texas and attempts to reignite an old flame. What will happen when she learns his candle now burns for you?

✿ @jobean12-blog

➥ slow ride

»Joel picks you up (sorta rescues you) and your attraction to him is instant even with the state of the world, but does he feel the same?

✿ @alt-vera

➥ text me texas

»joel miller worries that the girl he’s been seeing is holding out on him on purpose. she definitely isn’t.

✿ @gutsby

➥ die hard

»Joel tries Viagra for the very first time.

✿ @freelancearsonist

➥ the only heaven i’ll be sent to

»Joel finds a familiar face while out on a smuggling run.

✿ @nexusnyx

➥ keep close

» It takes you six months to break. You thought you'd last longer. Tried convincing yourself that everything in your head was because he saved you, not because of real attraction. One night, Joel proves that to be wrong.

✿ @mothandpidgeon

➥ stiff

»As Joel's getting older, his body isn't working the way it used to. Luckily, you're happy to help him out.

✿ @storiesforallfandoms

➥ too sweet

»in which his friend's daughter comes on to him and he tries to convince her that they can't be together...tries

✿ @theidiotwhowritesthings

➥ request

✿ @wheresarizona

➥ but i would die for you in a secret

»The relationship you have with Joel Miller is… complicated, and you’re not entirely sure what to even call it. There’s the fact no one can know, so his kid doesn’t find out, and you’re pretty sure he’s ashamed of your age difference—he’s not your boyfriend, but you only fuck each other; this thing started months ago, and Joel does not like it when men give you attention, because he wants you all to himself. But again, he’s not your sexy, older boyfriend.

✿ @alwaysmicado

➥ you wanted this

✿ @hr43s

➥ government hooker

»Joel miller, your dad’s best friend is a security guard for celebrities. He takes you to one of his jobs as part of a university homework you need to do, but he let his guard down.

✿ @schnarfer

➥ the kindness of strangers

»Let's fall madly in love with neighbour!Joel

✿ @headkiss

➥ request

✿ @ozarkthedog

➥ a glimpse of heaven

»joel secretly watches you shower.

✿ @bits-and-babs

➥ play boy

»ellie steals one of bills magazines and you and joel decide to see what the fuss is about.

✿ @oliviajdjarin

➥ stay down

»Joel thought he had grown accustomed to fear until he finds you covered in blood

hopefully all links work, let me know if not <3

[ashetherando]

Disney Adult| FizzOzzie Poly x reader (and separate)

my sorry ass have been looking at Disney World stuff and as a Disney Adult I’m surprised I haven’t made this before! pronouns: They/Them/Theirs

Key words:

(y/n)-Your Name

(l/n)-Last Name

(POLY FIZZOZZIE )

They don’t really care of what you’re into, as long you don’t be stupid or harassing imps/demons they don’t care. They will in fact have a whiplash of Disney merchandise you own at your home with the Minnie/Mickey ears and clothes, PJs, and cups! They will be shitty boyfriends if they shit all over your interest while you don’t. If you’re going to Disney World/Land, you’re their guide! Teach them about Genie Plus, teach them about the Disney World app, cuz they’re helpless without your Disney eyes! Also, let them pick their magic bands there so much designs and their brains cannot handle it! Also, quick thing, give fizz a kid leash. You’ll be walking around in Animal Kingdom with Ozzie planning what he wants to eat, then POOF Fizz somehow learned to park hop and is now at Magic Kingdom at Peter Pans Flight!

💙OZZIE/ASMODEUS💙

Ozzie believes that Disney can be dark, for example Hunchback of Notre Dame, The Black Caldron, and basically he’s more into the Disney Renaissance than the present day movies at the Disney franchise. He will not be surprised when he comes over to your home and you hand him over Disney PJs, he doesn’t care about how much Disney merchandise your house can handle, as long you’re not blowing off all your money for a Disney figure ‘cuz you still need to pay bills and rent! But! When you ask what he wants at Disney World, he asked “coffee” as a joke, but when you came back from your trip and before you clock in “here ya go, Asmodeus!” You said as you held up the bag with the word Joffrey’s printed on it “I wasn’t so sure what you wanted so I kinda just guessed!” He tilted his head to the side as you place the bag on his desk, he opened the bag and see two bags of coffee grounds one is a flavorful coffee ground and the other is just plan coffee grounds “I wasn’t expecting you to get me this” he grabbed a bag and analyzing it “do you not want it?” “No! I want it, I really do need some coffee grounds, I just never thought that Disney have these type of things” “well, it’s a huge company! Of course they’re gonna have coffee!” “That’s fair” he placed the bag down and bring up the flavor on, it’s was obviously bought at the Polynesian resort exclusive. “Thank you, (y/n)”

When you finally convinced him to go with you while being part of the Disney Vacation Club, you have to treat him by bringing him to Food and Wine festival. He’s quite interested by the new wine they give out every year than the food. Keep an eye on him, we don’t know his drink tolerance is, he might get drunk at Epcot!

💚FIZZAROLLI💙

Fizzarolli is a guy to be like “haha! Imagine liking a company for babies” just deal with it, he’s gonna be a prick about your hyper fixations, but he’s doing it for jokes and will let you know about that. He only watches whatever is on TV, if you and him are chilling in your home. Just stream something on Disney Plus, then he’ll watch it with you. Here’s my advice: Have a Disney Marathon and he’ll won’t even notice! I’m kidding he will once it’s 1am and you’re watching Tangled, then he’ll be like “Old Disney is better” then he’ll leave the room. If you’re watching more present Disney movie, he’ll yell it from the hallway “Old Disney is better!” He may be your boyfriend, but he’s such a bad influence on you, when Ozzie is good with money and help you with your impulsive spendings, Fizz encourages you to buy that. You will send him a picture of a new Disney pin collection through text “oh look how cute they are!” “Get it” “fizz, I have rent that is due” “idc, get the pins” “you don’t even know the characters!” “I know the blue fur ball!” “Don’t call stitch a fur ball” “why did you send me this anyways!?” “….the pins will be here on Tuesday next week” “knew it” Disney World will be an episode and a half, homie will be in a different park quicker before you say Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious so please give him a kid leash before he does it again, but convincing him took so long! You have to show him some videos, nothing too intimidating since he’s a Disney Virgin, just simplify your vacation visit, but not for clothing wear, the Greed Ring is hot, and you two will be sweating allot, which means chafing! Biker shorts are your whore! Treat him with any festival and he’ll be happy! If it’s the Food and Wine, he’ll will eat any food or drink any wine, but let’s be happy that you brought him!

[the-dumpster-fire-of-life]

CAN U PLS DO TOM X LATINA READERRR PLSS I LOVE UR POSTS SM 😋😋

#latinas4tomkaulitz 🤭

(hell yeah I can! Enjoy!)

Tom K. x Latina!Reader

We all know Tom is gonna be stolen by your aunties

He's getting all the tea and literally being fed every second

Your family does not stop asking about Tom

Especially because he's fuking famous and dating you

No offense

Tom is literally so shocked and tired on how long parties can go on

He was literally falling asleep on a chair when it hit two AM

He was fucked up as well

He most likely drags Georg, Gustav and Bill along as well to your family parties

And you know damn well your family gets their asses drunk

Not even on purpose Tom just challenged your uncle to drinking

Your family literally drops everything about you to Tom

Your mother showed him baby pictures of you while your aunt told embarrassing stories

You walk in with him and he is swept away by your aunties and mother the second they see him

They give him so many weird but funny nicknames as well but some are cute

Main one is Germany though because you're family ain't creative

Your cousins are dragging Tom around as well

Especially when Bill tags along

Your little cousins are all over them and having the time of their life

Especially after they learn about their fame

Tom just loves when you speak Spañish

Especially cussing him out

It may be toxic but he loves that shit

He cannot take anything seriously when you are mad at him and yelling at him in Spanish

He slips in so many flirty and dirty comments

He cannot stop

He likes learning about your culture as well

Keep the spice down for a bit because he may not be able to take it all at first

But he will fuck that shit up because it tastes so fucking good

He never leaves without a plate of food

Or beer

Also please make him be a chambelan

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

@billsjum6ie @bigbootahjudy @ilovebill-and-gustav @r3dheadedw0rld @kiwitsune @V4mpyboyy @novaaisstupid @billybabeskaulitz @yas-v @iischafer @dilfverz @ahswhore0 @graciegizmo3184 @sweetpuffy12 @80s-tingz @ryiana @yuriayato5 @bunnysenpai31 @banshailey @bellastoner420 @victryzvv9 @stxngnr @killed-kiss @stilesandjames @m00nzyblogs @sylisan @lyzit @trixiekaulitz @laylasbunbunny @5hyslv7 @limaswife

[nanawritesit]

Irene Girlfriend Headcanons!

She prefers that you call her “Joohyun” rather than Irene. She wants to feel like you know the real her instead of her stage presence.

Speaking of which, she often slips into her Daegu dialect around you

You were never intimidated by her like everyone else was, you were warm and loving regardless of how “scary” she seemed

It took her a while to open up to you about her inner thoughts and feelings. She’s so used to bottling it all up in order to be a good leader that she doesn’t stop to think when she might need help

But you help her with that, constantly reassuring every single one of her insecurities. Even when she doesn’t ask, you’ll always be the first one to tell her she’s done well!

She cooks you seaweed soup every year for your birthday just like she does for the members 💚

Ordering her tea for her whenever you’re at a coffee shop because she’s too afraid of being judged by the barista for not liking coffee

Eating her vegetables for her (if you like them ofc)

Finally convincing her to stop dying her hair and stick with her natural black color because it’s her favorite and it suits her best

It took her a long time to accept it, but Joohyun is a lover of the simple things in life. You guys don’t need any extravagant outings or fancy gifts to be happy! Things like reading together, watching the sunset, taking walks, listening to music, cooking her favorite tteokbokki… those are what draw you together.

Holding her while she cries watching “The Notebook”

You started keeping perfumes in your car and carrying essential oils with you everywhere since she’s so sensitive to smells

You also help bring her back down to Earth when she starts spacing out, waving a hand in front of her face and never making a huge fuss over it. You just remind her what she was talking about and continue on with your conversation

Joohyun is also a lover of solitude. However you’re the only one she makes an exception for. She loves taking you to Ttukseom Island or the Folk Museum in Bukcheon. They’re her happy places and she wants to share them with you!

Because of her, you started keeping a journal. The two of you have nights where you just sit in silence and write together 🥰

She won’t hesitate to correct you on your spelling and grammar, even over text 😑

You feel like you learn something new about her every day. She’s always so reserved, and her mind runs at a mile a minute, so every once in a while she’ll just drop this huge piece of Joohyun lore that takes you by surprise

Always giving her your fortune cookies and lottery tickets because she just has so much good luck

If you play video games or do puzzles, and you just can’t get pass a certain stage, she’ll just walk over and figure it out for you in seconds, and it leaves you baffled every time

Making her show you how the heck she can draw a perfect circle (you still can’t understand after a thousand times)

She has a tendency to “mother” you. (Doing your laundry, making you go to bed early, telling you take your vitamins and drink water…) You’ll have to explain to her that while you appreciate her trying to help, she doesn’t need to worry about you so much!

She’s still going to do your laundry though. She just loves doing it too much not to.

I hope you don’t mind having a high heat bill, because Joohyun cannot handle the cold! (If not, you’ll have to loan her several of your hoodies and blankets!)

Comforting her whenever she encounters heights, water, or loud noises

Her manager tried to tell her to avoid PDA with you to protect her image and avoid a scandal, but she just can’t stop herself from holding your hand or clinging to your arm!

Once word gets out that the two of you are dating, she really has no problem telling the fans that while she hopes they can be supportive, she’s going to be with you whether they like it or not.

She would give up everything if it meant she could stay with you, and you would do the same for her in a heartbeat 💜

[fandomaya]

grant me this wish, sweetheart

Pairing: Kento Nanami x Reader

CW: loads of fluff, basic dinner date with rich man Nanami, both reader and Nanami being lovesick, Nanami loves to spoil and take care of reader, no gendered terms used, but reader wears a dress and a pair of earrings, mentions of food and wine.

WC: 1.4K+

The view is so beautiful from the 32nd floor, and you have to admit this time and again that your boyfriend has an impeccable taste when it comes to finer things in life. It is not surprising given how successful and self-made Kento Nanami is. Having a wide array of experiences and attaining an unmatched sense of maturity, being in a relationship with him just makes you want to learn more about life through his comforting presence and influence.

Your endless gaze towards the city view is broken when the waiter comes with a bottle of wine. You do not care to read the label or anything because you know Kento only chooses the best. Moreover, he told you to not worry about anything because as always he says he gets the “stress-relief” from spending time with you and taking care of you This feeling of relying on someone else may have felt bizarre when Kento wasn’t in your life, but now it is therapeutic to trust him and not overthink in his company.

Shifting your focus from the sound of wine being poured to your glass, you thank the waiter, and then you see Kento is resting his head on his palm and staring at you with such a deep longing gaze as if he is soaking up all of you as much as he could. So much love from his mellow gaze often makes you shy away, choosing to hide your blush while sipping wine, hoping the red of the liquid can excuse the redness in your demeanor.

“Kento you know there is an amazing view right beside you? You can spare a few glances there too”, you say before popping a cherry tomato in your mouth.

Pricking a pasta shell on his fork, he just shrugs and casually smirks, “why would I look anywhere else when the best view is right in front of me?”

Your eyes were wide, and you never had any apt response to whenever Kento appreciated you with his smooth voice and soft yet determined gaze.

Refocusing on the man in front of you, you see him shuffle and place an elegant box in front of you. As a reflex action, you end up hiding your face in your soft hands because there is one thing that Kento doesn’t understand no matter how smart he is, that his company and lovely attention towards you is enough. But Kento finds his joy in spending his material wealth on your well-being and upkeep. Unlike you, he feels it's greater than any investment and business he has ever made because the results are beyond any monetary gains.

“Kento what is this again? You already gifted me this dress today, and you told me that no matter what I cannot request to split the bill but now another gift, and it looks so expensive! Kento this is really unnecessary.”

Your boyfriend being a man of few words just heaves a sigh and opens the box and pushes it towards you, “how is it? I think this emerald bracelet would suit you so much. Go on, love, try it on.”

Still resilient in your stance, keeping your arms crossed, you determinedly reply, “Kento please don’t deviate from the issue. You have already done so much for me and I appreciate your sentiments as well as really grateful to have you as my partner, but this bracelet was not needed right now.”

Kento listened to you carefully only to glance down for a second and abruptly pushed his chair backward. Did you anger him? Maybe you should have accepted his gift instead of being so nagging, but you just wanted him to be careful with his spending and as his well-wisher you just wanted him to be a tad bit careful about finances. You know that he is financially abundant and, way more capable and mature than you, but it gets hard for you to just keep on taking from him. 

In between your thoughts, you suddenly see him lift his chair with the left hand and place it beside your chair, not caring what some of the other patrons in the restaurant are thinking of such a seemingly bizarre activity in a classy establishment. But you had to be in awe of the silent strength that your boyfriend possessed. He sits down again, his calloused yet comforting hands goes to your supple cheek, caressing them in a manner that makes you lean into his touch. Closing your eyes and exhaling his name in a quiet plea, since you know you can never win against him on such matters, where he is determined in showering you with love in all possible ways and beyond, known to mankind. 

Tucking a stray strand of hair behind your ear and admiring the sleek gold earrings that he had chosen for you on a business trip to Paris, a couple of years back. He trails his hand down your neck to your soft arms and raises your hand to kiss your knuckles with so much tenderness that it makes all your inhibitions melt away and warm your heart. He trails his lips towards your wrist, and the throbbing pulse underneath calms him down in an unusual manner. The way he looks up at you with those tired eyes that have found a shelter in your eyes, with so much of devotion that it seems that the time has stopped, as if it is just the two of you in this whole wide world and that is just simply enough.

Kento turns to his side, to pull out the bracelet from the open box, wraps the cold metal on your delicate yet capable wrists and admires the green jewels on your skin. Pulling you towards him and maintaining his signature eye contact that signifies his determination, he just says, “This simple bracelet is not about whether it is needed or not. It is about wishes. I wish to see you wearing this. It is not a hard wish to grant to an old man like me, is it now?”

You couldn’t help but frown a little and burst out in a chuckle, and end up lightly hitting his chest. 

“Kento you are hardly a few years older than me! Stop being so prematurely geriatric”

“Darling, a decade and more doesn’t count as a few years”

“Doesn’t matter because we are together and time is an illusion.” you retort with a huff, only to wrap your arms around him to hide your face in his neck and whisper a thank you on his skin.

Kento’s strong arms encircle your waist and like always he instinctively rubs your back, and also admires the faint reflection on the window panes, where you look good in his arms in any possible way and angle, that keeps the rare smile on his face intact.

Pulling away from his neck, you look at him, admiring his features, which seem to get more attractive with every day. Or maybe you are just too lovesick. Or maybe he is indeed like the wine you had tonight, where he gets better with aging. 

“I thought of getting you a ring, but I can’t entertain the possibility of getting rejected in a damn restaurant.” Kento had to say this while breaking your reverie.

At that moment you swear your boyfriend is sometimes too blunt that makes him adorably stupid. 

“Kento you want to know something about yourself?” you said while plastering a forced smile full of sarcasm on your face. 

He continues rubbing your sides and cocks his head to the side, curious to know what you have to say. 

"You are probably the first person who reveals their proposal plans to their partner. I think you are mingling with Gojo too much."

"My love, I am a simple man. A person like you who is perfection personified does make me worry a little about your answer." 

You are left speechless again, given how sincere Kento is with his intentions, and you almost want to run away because your heart beats too fast and is about to break free from your chest, but you have to regain your composure because Kento cannot always have the upper hand. 

"Hmm, I may be a bit careful about money, but I won't accept a proposal without a nice ring from my future husband…" looking away you shyly mumble, “also I am not stupid to reject the best person in the world”

Kento being attentive as ever does catch your words. Smiling gently, he makes your head shift towards him and like always he just looks at your eyes lovingly while caressing the apple of your cheeks, before he closes the distance between you two and pours his affection when his lips meet yours, to conclude this beautiful night.

A/N: This was in my drafts for so long and I finally got the motivation to finish it. I don't think it's that good, but I swear it was much better in my head ;) Feedback and reblogs are much appreciated <3

[ikanasocking]

Fix what is bothering you

Liam and Kyle were living together in a small flat. Four rooms. Either of these boys had his own, a kitchen, a bathroom and a small space they had to share together. Even while living together both guys rarely had anything in common or spend much time together.

Kyle was obsessed with cars and football. His dream was to become a professional player in an international club and being known all over the world. So he trained for it. Six times the week. Good for him was, that his parents were paying for everything. And not to mention, they could pay for everything he wanted. Never the less, Kyle was not able to get his body in the shape he wanted it. No matter how much he trained, his body would not pack on muscles. So Kyle looked very thin. His black hair were short. His face was kind of long and his eyes were brown.

Liam on the other hand did not care about sports or cars. Liam did not work out much but still, his body showed some definition. Liam was an average height, blonde hair, green eyes. The most day he spend outside of the flat to get away from his roommate. He owned the flat but was forced to take someone like Kyle, so he could pay for his live. Still in university he had a lot of bills to pay. That was the reason Liam was more in the library than at home. The other reason was, that Kyle always had friends over.

And this was the only thing both guys had in common. A few of their friends. The friends in question were, Lars, Martin and Nils. Martin and Nils were more friends with Kyle and used Liam more as an easy to manipulate friend that would do stuff for them. Lars on the other hand was more friends with Liam. Liam might be introverted and did rarely speak up to someone, he did with Lars. And Lars understood how he felt. So he supported him, the best was he could. Even when the others were talking bad behind Liam’s back, he would even stand up for his friend. But he would never said that directly to his face. He did not want him to know that the other were talking about him.

Weeks went by and the trash talk about Liam began to stack up, because he was gone from the flat even more than usual. Kyle, Martin, Nils and Lars were sitting together in Kyle’s room. Martin and Nils were muscular guys. But also pretty smart, what you would not believe on first sight. They were interested in cars and football as well. Lars was a pudgier guy who was not into cars, but shared a passion for football. The only one in the group that as actively playing. And that not on a gaming console.

“I swear, Liam is not even keeping up with his chores. He leaves me to do all the work”, Kyle said after they finished another game on the console.

“Seriously? He should be doing all your chores as well. This looser is not even a real man”, Nils said.

“What do you mean by that?” Lars asked.

“You did not pick up on the signs? He is checking us out every time he sees us. Bet he is mostly not here because he always gets hard when he sees one of us”, Nils laughed.

“I don’t think he is gay”, Lars said and sipped on a glass of water.

“Oh he is absolutely a faggot. One that wants to be dominated by real men, like us”, Martin laughed as well.

“Well I guess you are interpreting, too much into this. He is in the library and learns for his exam. And he is not here because it is too noise to concentrate.”

“Yeah sure. I am living with him and I thin Martin and Nils are right. He is a faggot. Pick up the signs. He is not interested in cars or football. Which straight guy is not interested in one of those things?”

“A lot? I cannot follow those arguments. Isn’t Liam your friend?” Lars asked.

“Our friend? Oh please. I am just living with him because it is cheap.”

“We keep him around because he always jumps when we ask for something. He is not really a friend. More a way to get stuff for free”, Martin said.

“I cannot believe it. You are just abusing the poor guy?”

“Sure. He is letting us using him. It is his fault that he is not standing up to us like a man”, Nils said.

Lars stood up and looked at the others.

“I cannot believe you are treating a guy like him so disrespectful. He is a caring person who just wants to make a living. Guess I was wrong thinking you would care for anything else then yourself.”

With that Lars left the group, without having a look back. After he left the room all three boys looked at each other and began to laugh.

“Never thought Lars would be as gay as Liam. Bet he will run right to his boyfriend, crying about how mean we were”, Kyle said.

“Yeah. Bet they would make a great couple.”

With that they continued talking shit about Liam and now Lars as well, while playing football on the console.

What they did not account for, what the open window, so Lars heard everything they said about him as well. And he would not stand for this. These guys would need to learn some respect. So he went to the library, where Liam would normally be. He found him. His head resting on the desk between bunches of books.

“Poor guy. Must have gotten not much sleep lately”, he thought and went over to him.

Carefully he put his hand on his shoulder and Liam sat upright immediately.

“Sorry I will put the books back, this instant”, he said.

“It’s okay. It’s just me”, Lars said and Liam looked at him.

His eyes were red from the sleep and it looked like he had cried recently.

“Oh, what are you doing here? Aren’t you with the others?” Liam asked while gathering the books.

“Well not anymore. I was worried about you. They were talking about some concerning stuff?” Lars said.

“Like how they think I am gay?”

“How do you?”

“Sometimes I was outside of the flat waiting for you all to leave before entering. Are you here to make fun of me right here?”

“Actually I was not making fun of you in the first place.”

“Okay. So you are just here to tell me, these guys are taking advantage of me?”

“You should calm down, Liam. I am neither here to make fun of you nor to tell you the shit they are talking about you. You seem stressed. Why not come with me, to my place and let us talk there.” Liam offered him with a smile.

“If you insist. I have no fight left in me to discuss about this” Liam said.

With that they put the books away and went to Lars house. He was still living with his parents. He was still in an apprenticeship and money was an issue for him as well. So he saved some from living with his parents and his brother. When they arrived at his home it was already evening. Lars led his friend to his room, informed his parents about the guest and sat with his friend there.

“So, Lars. Why bothering with all of this?”

“Because I care about you.”

“Yeah but your friends will not be thrilled seeing you with a faggot like me”, Liam said.

“How much do you know about what they said?”

“Enough. I know how they think about me and that they are only taking advantage of me.”

“And you did not try to change it?”

“How? I need the rent from Kyle. I cannot get rid of him. And when I am getting on the bad site of Nils and Martin, they will make Kyle harass me even more. You know how tiering it is to live with a guy who thinks I am his house bitch? Only there to clean for him and do all the work he does not want to do? I gave up fighting a few months after he moved in with me.”

“But why did you not tell me? I thought we were friends”, Lars said.

“Because I thought you think like the others.”

“You did not hear how I stood up for you every time they talked bad about you?”

“Once I heard you saying something. But they all just laughed and turned on you. So I began to isolated myself, to not get you in more trouble then you already were.”

Lars just blinked at Liam. He could not believe that this guy was going to such extends for him.

“But”, he began, when he noticed the tears in Liam’s eyes.

“I need a moment”, Liam said and Lars stood up.

“Sure. If you want, you can stay for the night. I don’t mind. We can talk later, if you want.”

With that he left the room. After the door was closed he sighed heavily. He could hear Liam cry, but had no idea how to comfort him.

“Troubles in paradise, brother?” Liam’s brother asked and came out of his room.

“What would you know?” he said and looked at him.

“Oh calm down, Liam. It was just a joke.”

“Sorry I am a little bit tense, right now.”

“Might have something to do with the cutie crying in your room?”

“I am not in the mood for your jokes, brother”, he said approaching his younger brother.

He was a little bit more on the pudgier site as well. Lars and he shared a lot of his looks.

“Oh man, you are tense today. Want to talk about it? I am sure you will feel better after it. You could also go to mum for a talk, but I guess better stick with me”, he laughed and Lars entered his brother’s room.

The room was slightly messy with stuff laying around everywhere. Lars and his brother sat down on the bed and Lars brought him up to speed with all that happened.

“And you are sure you have no feelings for this guy?” His brother asked after he was done explaining.

“Man again with the”, he began.

“I mean yeah you are straight. Sure. Straight as a circle brother. Maybe out parents are not seeing it. But I know what you are looking at online. And some of your teammates told me some stories. Maybe it is time to be true to yourself.”

“What do you mean?”

“You have a delicate taste in man and some, I would call it, interesting fetish. Most of it contains men. So I ask myself, do you care about Liam because he is a friend, or is he your friend?”

Lars said nothing and just looked at the floor.

“I mean hey, it is okay to play something for your friends, your parents or me. But at least be true to yourself. With your other little problem, I might have a solution for this.”

“You have?”

“Do you think you are the only kinky one in this family? A friend send me something. A website that is supposed to grant wishes. Might be worth a shot. I have not tried it.”

“That sounds like complete scam and a reason to get a virus on your pc.”

“Maybe it is maybe not. Well it will not download something, so no virus. But even if it is not working, maybe it will give you and Liam some comfort. A wish can sometimes change a lot of things.”

“Well send it over. I will see if it helps.”

“Always happy to help you, brother. I guess your guy calmed down by now. So you might want to make him cry again.”

“Har Har.”

With that Lars brother send him the link to the website. Lars went over to his room and opened the door silently. Liam was lying on his bed sleeping. Lars decided to let him sleep. He took a blanket and tugged Liam in. He took of his socks and went to his pc. He powered him up and opend the link, his brother send him. A small textbox appeared and the text.

“Type in your wish and we will make it come true.”

He began typing.

“I wish for Liam to be happy and find someone he deserves.”

He pressed enter and the site loaded.

“Wish granted”, was all he received.

He turned around to Liam and looked at him. If he was brutally honest, he looked kind of cute. His penis began to pulsate and pressed against his shorts. Lars was disgusted with himself. There was his friend who was having a hard time and he could not even help him, but got a hard on by just watching him sleep. If he was honest to himself, yes he was kind of gay. He liked Liam a lot. But he would never tell him. Liam deserved someone who would really appreciate him. And who knew if he even was gay? Lars continued staring at his friend before going to bed as well. They slept in the same bed all night.

The next morning Lars woke up to find Liam was not lying next to him. Confused he looked around and found his friend at his computer. Typing in a wish to the wish granting website. Crap he forgot to close it yesterday and shut his pc down. Liam was done and pressed the enter button. The same thing as with Lars happened and the wish was somehow granted. Liam turned around to find Lars now sitting upright in the bed.

“Morning”, he said and Lars nodded.

“I am sorry for what happened yesterday”, Lars said.

“Don’t be. At least you showed me you care. And creating a website to make a wish was a sweet move of you. Thank you.”

Liam said and came back to the bed. He put back his socks on and sat down then.

“I guess I should go home now. Your parents might not be happy seeing you with another boy in a bed”, Liam said and wanted to go, when Lars took his arm and pulled him back. Liam was surprised, tumbled back, before falling on the bed. The lips of the boys met each other, after Liam fell down. A short and unwanted kiss was the result.

Surprised both boys moved their hats back.

“I am sorry, I did not mean to”, Lars began and looked at Liam.

He did not say anything. He was still processing what had happened right there. But after a short time Liam made a move and kissed Lars again. This time not by accident. Lars was completely surprised by this. But he did not fight it. It felt way too good. His penis got hard again. When their lips parted Liam looked at his friend with a sad expression.

“I am sorry, Lars. I did not know what’s gotten into me. Please forget what happened. It will not happen again”, Liam said and wanted to go again.

Tears filling his eyes again. Lars still got his arm, so Liam could not get away. Instead of pulling him back, Lars just got up and then approached Liam.

“Why would you say that? Did you not enjoy it?” Lars asked and moved his hand to Liam’s crotch.

He could feel, that the boy was hard.

“I did, but you and I”, Liam tried to put a sentence together but his emotions were too much.

“Let me tell you something, Liam. I was in the closet for so long. I guess it is time to come out. I enjoyed your company all the years. Not only as a friend. I was fantasising about more with you. Liam, I am in love with you”, he said and Liam looked shocked at him.

“But, your family, your friends”, Liam began.

“If they are not accepting it, they are neither my family nor my friends. I have not been there the last years for you. But now I want to be there for you. Maybe even for the rest of our live.”

Liam said nothing. He just snuggled up to Lars’s shoulder and started to cry again. Lars just hugged him, hoping to comfort his friend this way. It worked and Liam calmed down after some time.

“What do you say? We forget about the others and start a new live?”

“But Kyle still lives with me”, Liam said.

“And I don’t think I will get him out of the flat, anytime soon.”

“Then move in with me.”

“Here? I don’t think this will work out.”

“Well let’s start with a few days. I guess you need some peace and quiet and sleep. Let’s grab some things and you stay here for a few days. What do you say?”

Liam did not want to say anything and just nodded. So both boys went over to Liam’s flat. Only to find it trashed. Stuff was lying around everywhere. And Kyle was in the little space they shared. He seemed to be sleeping. The aroma of alcohol was in the air.

“What a pig”, Lars thought.

Liam did not say anything. He went straight to his room and began gathering some stuff. Meanwhile Lars was waiting for him to finish. Just as Liam was done gathering his stuff, Kyle woke up.

“Hey, what? A good you are back”, he said in a still drunken voice.

“You should get this shit cleaned up as soon as”, Kyles began.

Lars wanted to step in immidiatly, but Liam was faster.

“No. You made the mess, you clean it up.”

“What? How dare you talking to me like”, he began.

“I talk to you however I want. You are nothing more than a dirty pig that is a sucker for my and Lars socks”, Liam said.

Lars was confused why his friend should say something like this.

“You little. I should punch some sense in you. I will show you what kind of sucker I am for”, Kyle said and approached Liam.

Lars wanted to rush over, but Kyle was still so drunk that he fell to the floor directly in front of Liam’s feet.

“So good”, he moaned and began to sniff the feet of Liam.

“That’s what I thought. Come into my room and then you might have more of my feet”, Liam said and went back to his room.

Kyle crawled after him and Lars decided to take a look as well. There was his boyfriend sitting on his bed and the straight jock Kyle just sniffing away at his feet, while playing with his dick. Lars got hard as well just by watching it. Liam looked at him, smiled and tapped on the bed next to him. Unsure Lars sat down next to him.

“How did you?” he began.

“I guess the site worked. It fulfilled my wish. Now everything I say to Kyle, Nils and Martin will happen.”

Lars felt a tug at his feet and saw Kyle pulling off his shoes to sniff his feet as well.

“Now what do you say, Kyle. Would you like to be at our feet forever?”

“Yes. Oh fuck yes.”

“Well then so be it. After all you are nothing more than our socks.”

With that Kyle’s body began to transform. The fabric of the socks began to engulf him, until he was completely covered. He disappeared and was now Liam’s and Lars’s socks.

“He is pretty comfortable. I guess this was a good decision”, Liam said.

Lars was still a little bit confused but was so turned on by his boyfriend right now, that he did not ask anything.

“What happened? Where am I?” Kyle’s voice suddenly echoed through their brains.

He sounded sobered up.

“You are at our feet”, Liam answered and wiggled his toes.

Kyle moaned with pleasure by the sensation.

“This is impossible. When I am getting out here, I will”, he said between moans.

“Oh shut it. You have two options here, Kyle. The first is to continue threatening me and you will stay as you are right now. Or you can shut up and strike a deal with me”, Liam said.

“What kind of deal?”

“I will tell you if you decide. If you want the deal you will have to fulfil it. No getting out of it.”

“Sure. What kind of sick game you wanna play, faggot?”

“That is what I thought. I am giving you six months. In these six months you will have to make Martin and Nils put on a special pair of socks. If you succeed you will not be turned into a sock again. But you will still be a dirty sock loving slave for us. If you fail, well you will just turn back into our socks. Do we have a deal?”

“As if I could lose this. Everything is better than being a pair of socks.”

“Oh well. Then you will turn back into your old self. Let me and Lars leave the flat in peace and try to carry out the deal. You will be handed the special socks. You just need them to put them on. The rest will happen then.”

Slowly the socks began to lose fabric and Kyle was lying back on the ground naked. He stood up and began covering up.

“Oh stop that. This is nothing to be embarrassed of.”

Kyle took his hands away and now Liam as well as Lars got a good look at him. He was smaller than Lars would have thought.

“Guess he got some compensating to do, for this” Liam pointed at Kyle’s dick and laughed.

Then Liam took two pairs of his socks and handed them to Kyle. Lars and Liam left the flat and Kyle to fulfil his part of the deal.  On their way back, Lars began asking Liam.

“How comes you choose this kind of deal for him?”

“Just imagine. His parents have a lot of cash. This way I can take advantage of him as he did of me.”

“Sure but how do you know, I would like this?”

“Do you not?”

“Well”, Lars began.

“No worries. You will soon see how good this is.”

Lars nodded.

“But anyway, why did Kyle agree to the deal? Was that you’re doing as well?”

“Not really. I guess he just heard, that he will not be our socks and that was all he heard. I am pretty sure he will not make it happen. So he will lose anyway.”

With that both boys stopped with the topic and began talking about other stuff. The weeks went by and the relationship between Liam and Lars grew more and more. Lars even told his parents how it was and they were okay with it. Even offered Liam to stay with them. But he just said that he was just waiting for Kyle to move out, which could be every day. And then the day came. Kyle wrote him, that he had fulfilled his part of the deal. Liam was a little bit surprised, but happy. He told Kyle that he would need to wait until tomorrow for conformation and then he would fulfil his end of the bargain.

A little bit earlier:

Nils, Martin and Kyle were sitting together in Kyle’s room. He had the special socks prepared for them and a plan how he would them make them put on.

“Hey how about a game? If I beat both of you in the next game, you will put on theses socks. Just once and then you can take them off again. Sounds good?”

“What the fuck man? What kind of weird game should this be?”

“Oh come on. It will be fun.”

“Well since you will not beat the both of us, we can play. When you lose you will put them on and lick both our feet”, Nils said challenging and looked at Kyle.

Jokes on you, I was waiting for this. God how much I want to lick those soles, Kyle thought and nodded.

So they began to play. Against the odds, Kyle came out victorious.

“Guess I won. Time for you to”, he began, when Nils and Martin already grabbed the socks and put them on.

“Now happy?” Martin asked.

“Sure. You can take them off now.”

Both boys looks at their feet and began to move their toes. Under the fabric, their own socks had disappeared and now they were only wearing Liam’s socks. Nils wore black socks with paws under his feet. Martin wore the same socks but in white.

“You know, somehow they feel pretty comfortable. I guess I will keep them”, Nils said.

“Sure, why not? I don’t care. They belong to Liam.”

“Ha to the faggot? No wonder. Only more a reason to keep them.”

With that they continued playing. Some hours later Martin and Nils went home. They lived close to each other, so they were driving with one car.

“Never expected to have Kyle making us do something like this”, Nils said.

“Me neither. But you were no better. What kind of idea was this?”

“Oh. If he wants to play, then he should pay for it.”

“Yeah and still we lost. But somehow I don’t know why but I don’t want to take these socks off”, Martin said.

“Me neither. They are so comfy and I don’t know. I cannot really describe it.”

“I know man. Bet yours are not as comfy as mine.”

“Bet mine are even comfier.”

“Never.”

“Try them”, Nils said, after he parked the car.

So both boys began exchanging one sock each and now either of them was wearing one black and one white puppy sock.

“You are right they are equally comfy”, Martin said.

“See? Told you. Well then, see you tomorrow.”

With that both boys parted and went into their rooms.

Nils was on his bed thinking about the day when suddenly he got hard as a rock. Confused he pulled his pants down and looked at his dick.

“Man, why am I so pent up?”

He began playing with himself. But today it felt different. It felt wrong to touch his dick. He could not cum. Not even getting closer to it. He was hard but still it felt bad to play with himself. Curios he took his black sock off and put it over his dick. A totally new sensation erupted from it. He began moaning and now he noticed that he was getting closed to an orgasm. A few minutes later he came. The orgasm was something else. It felt different. His dick even felt different. Spent he was lying there, the sperm filled sock still on his cock. But to his surprise his dick did not go down. He was still hard, begging again for release. So Nils began rubbing again. What he did not notice, was that the sock was now stuck to his dick, while the white one was stuck to his foot. He kept rubbing and rubbing. With each stroke his sperm got pushed into the fabric. Not long and he had another orgasm and filled the sock even more. But his dick still refused to go down, so he continued. After some time, the fabric decided that it was time to claim his new host. So it began spreading around his body. Bit by bit was swallowed by the fabric. Black and white. First his legs. Then his belly, his arms, his hands and at last even his head.

“Oh yes”, was the last thing Nils said and would say for the rest of his live.

His mouth was sealed by the sock fabric and he was nothing more than a black and white sock. The third orgasm sealed his new form and so there was no going back. His body began to hollow out. Everything turned to fabric. It felt so good, having his body rearranged. At last there was only socks left of what had been Nils. Martin had the same experience and he was transformed as well. They blacked out and woke up the next morning.

Oh what a night, Nils thought and tried to get up. His body was not responding.

“What the fuck?”, he asked trying to look around.

Everything was black. Where was he? From the smell he must be fallen into a pile of dirty socks.

“Finally awake, I see”, Liam said and sudden light flooded Nils’s eyes.  

Now he could see why it had been so dark. He had been shoved into a shoe. Liam’s shoe.

“What happened?” he asked.

“Oh nothing special”, Liam responded and suddenly Nils saw Martin.

He was on Liam’s foot. So that would mean, he was on Liam’s foot as well. That would explain the smell.

“Release me this instant”, Nils demanded.

“Oh hush, little sock. You are not only on my feet, but on Lars as well. Trust me you will love this new live. You lost the game against Kyle so it was only fair. Now I can take advantage of you, how you did of me. Enjoy it”, Liam said and Nils wanted to answer, when suddenly Kyle came into view.

He was completely naked and hard as a rock. A hand grabbed Nils and he was pulled closed to Kyles face. Air was forced through his body, cooling him down, giving him a shiver, as Kyle inhaled the scent. Then something wet was dragged along Nils’s body. It was Kyles tongue. Every bit of his body that was touched with the saliva was tingling. Nils felt so good. Even though he had no physical dick anymore he felt hard. Kyle continued with his worshipping and Nils felt like he was cumming over and over.  

“That was the a good whish, darling”, Lars said, looking over to Liam.

“I know. He Kyle after you are done with our feet, go make us breakfast”, he said.

“Anything you like master. But please let me cum”, he begged.

“Maybe after breakfast, if you are a good sock slave.”

With that Kyle continued his worshipping. Nils and Martin lost their last resistance with all the pleasure and Lars was happy that Liam finally got what he deserved. A boyfriend and Kyle, how would do anything for them.

[ghostflowerhotpotch]

Spiderman Society and Manipulation Part 2

Horrible Copy Mechanism and the Responsibilities you put in your own shoulders

Part 1

Oh boy this is going to be interesting for sure.

While I was writing the first part I originally wasn't thinking of writing this section at the beginning, I thought considering the situation it was better to focus in how the lower rankings and people in need are put between a rock and a hard place, and in the cultish characteristics it has.

But then I realized is not just that is a horrible copy mechanism that they are more or less using as a crutch, it also involves why Miguel is convinced over this, and also the responsibility that still comes with it.

WARNING: The following chat will have talks about trauma, recovery, and accountability. It will also include mentions of real religious manipulation and cultish behaviours.

If you think any of this could be triggering, please consider skipping this one.

But before we address the sad reality that is enforcing canon by the eldest/higher up members of this society, let me address something that I didn't mention last time.

Part of the reason all of this is bad is because Canon is fake, this theory falls apart by the seams, and this makes the society more like a cult exactly for this reason!

Here is the long version of why I say this so firmly.

But because I don't want to sent people to do homework, here is the cliff notes version:

Canon Event ASM-90 cannot be happening at this moment, because Spot IS an anomaly. Also, Miguel said himself that canon event ASM-90 is when a captain dies in a battle between the spider-person and a nemesis, but Spot isn't Pavitr's nemesis, and Miguel himself said that Spot shouldn't had happened and is another anomaly like Miles, so why Captain Singh should had died at that moment?

The black matter that supposedly is happening because Miles broke canon? Was happening BEFORE we saw the captain. The alchemax building is breaking down, and has a dark matter absorbing it, which gets bigger and bigger as we see our heroes descend, and then in the same spot the building felt, now there is a black hole! Coincidence? Doubtful.

Miles's universe didn't fell because he became a spider-man, even if by being an "anomaly" you should expect to cause some sort of reaction, right? Further more, he blames Miles and Co for the hole in the multi-verse, but this is ignoring the fact the spot not only was the one to transport the spider, he has MULTIPLE of them. But Miles's universe has no reaction to any of this somehow? And the only issues it had was because of the collider messing up?

Look dear reader, I feel the fact that Pavitr's example doesn't fit the bill by Miguel's own words, and Miles's case in ITSV has jackshit to do with being anomaly; is safe to say this isn't about canon. Is about what is happening.

Because Miguel, Peter, Jess and the rest are so blinded by this idea of canon on Spider-man, they can't notice an incongruity as they are explaining it to you.

You guys know what this means? This means that instead of learning what is actually going on with Pavitr's universe (probably more related to physics than spider-man in itself.) They are wasting time and resources in preserving a mythos that so far feels more like trying to fit a pattern and mix destiny with physics somehow.

So the question is...how come is that they don't see it? Why they believe in this well?

WELL-

Here is the interesting part about the "Canon is part of every spider-man story,." While is a horrible thing to say to people just starting that need to deal with the fact that they will lose love ones and suffer great hardships because of their work, for those who are over? Oh this is great news.

(I swear while looking at this I had a flashback of "G-d's time is perfect" and "Everything happens for a reason," after having a personal hardship. Goddammit this really falls in the steps to a cult way too much.)

Okay but seriously, I saw a lot of people over the past few months complain about how the other spiders could let this happen, and this is so horrible how come Miles is being the only real spider-man here-

Is trauma, is all back to trauma.

Because okay, we don't know until which point the canon theory goes; I would say most spider-people are bit when they are teens or young adults (tho there are universes where Aunt May or Uncle Ben got bitten- yes as senior adults.) So I wouldn't be surprised if the "canon" events Miguel has mapped out has already happened to Peter, Jess and him, considering that at least Peter? Has been doing this for almost a quarter of a century; the others can't be too far apart for what I gather.

So while for someone like Gwen, Miles or Pavitr means "oh this is the list of horrible things you are going to suffer, sorry kid." For people like Peter, Miguel and Jess? Is probably more of a "oh those tragedies that you faced? They were part of the universe making sure it stays intact, is okay."

The sad reality, one of the most twisted things about this situation, is that the system uses the trauma of the eldest members to ensure they continue the cycle.

A funny thing about cults and many religions quite honestly, is that they have specific believes in place to ensure that people are not just indoctrinated, but are also incentivized to perpetuated the doctrine and make others do the same. Almost like evolution, the ideology behind became this way in order to ensure it is believed and doesn't die out like other beliefs.

I know I already put warnings previously, but now I want to bring a real life case because I think I need to hammer home how these beliefs can be so hard to shake off.

WARNING: Talks about Missionary Work, Murder, and passing mentions about colonialism.

The following discussion will involve the case around John Chau's missionary work and end, if you want to skip it, the discussing will begin and finish with the gif below.

So, in case you guys aren't familiar with this guy.

John Chau was a young man, he liked to go on adventures and was a passionate evangelical christian, who also liked to do Missionary Work. He went to a few different places, but the one were he died was in North Sentinel Island. He was killed by the native people there.

North Sentinel Island is among the last few places that has a group of people that are disconnected from the rest of the world. Every time someone tries to establish contact they killed, or at best, barely make it alive for what I recall. We don't know exactly know why since no one has been able to establish communications with them.

Now, I can't have this chat and not mention that is better to leave those people alone. They clearly prefer to continue with their traditional ways, and if you had seen some history you can probably tell even if they were interested, chances are this would end more poorly for them than anyone else.

Considering their reputation, that it is ILLEGAL to try to contact them for that exact reason (John Bribed two fisherman to leave him in the island, there is no way to get there without breaking the law.) You may be wondering, why he choose to go there?

Well, as mentioned before, missionary work; because he firmly believed this was "Satan's last stronghold" since no one was able to preach Christianity to them yet.

Okay, I know I am messing with the tiger here, and I don't want to insult anyone's faith; but I also have to be honest. I am Jewish, but I am a convert, my family is christian (I prefer not to say which branch but is probably obvious,) and while I will try to remain neutral let's say is hard when you are still processing stuff that happened to you.

I will say this, for all the people who called this man a "deluded idiot" when I remember this case, I feel two things, one of them is pity, and the other one is rage.

For starters, trying to force a religion into others is wrong in my eyes, (In Judaism is forbidden to proselytize, the traditional thing is actually deny converts until they ask for a third time.) It also forces an erasure of culture and colonialism, a lot of times trying to absorb past beliefs just to make the new believers happy, which muddies some stuff later on.

So, why I still feel bad for him?

Because he thought he was doing the right thing.

As someone who doesn't believe, in my eyes this is horrifying; but for him? He believes if he doesn't go to preach to this people, they may suffer in eternity for never hearing about Jesus. In his eyes, if he goes to them and convinces this group of worship his lord, he has now given eternal happiness and peace to this people; or the possibility to do so.

I feel bad, because this man was convinced to do something dangerous and bad, by thinking he was saving the lives of these people.

Sorry for the heavy topic, but I feel this was a good way to understand why the society does what it does. Because by bringing real life situations, I think is all the easier to understand how easy you can end up in these places.

Miguel theory doesn't just provide an explanation as to why the dimensions work the way they work, they also provide a nice explanation as to why they all had lived similar struggles, while they had suffered this much.

Is a balm to all those old wounds, because I am pretty sure Peter, nor the rest of the other adults that are "done" or mostly done with the canon events, or heck just suffered a few of them- still had their nightmares and hard times remembering all of the people they lost.

But if they learn about this after? Now they know it wasn't their fault, this was suppose to happen.

Remember what I said earlier? "G-d time is perfect"? That's something I heard growing up, from people who needed to hear that this has to have a purpose, serve a deeper meaning.

Otherwise, is just suffering.

However, can you see the parallels now? A belief that uses the pain and trauma of their members to make them believe, gives a "justifiable" and "noble" reason to continue pushing this narrative too (aka if we don't do it the universe collapses.) And just as well, is also fake, yet they are too blinded to notice, and they are now making people suffer for most probably not good reason while neglecting to learn what is actually going down.

Yeah, this really hammers more than anything the most cultish aspects of the Society. Because it is at is core.

Miguel's Biases

Now, I am convinced Miguel's canon theory is wrong, I know we can't know for sure what's going on until BTVS, but at this point I am rolling with that idea because too many things are adding up for me.

Yet despite how it becomes obvious in a way I consider embarrassing that Miguel doesn't notice- He is blinded by his own theory.

We all have our own biases, is not odd that we are inclined to believe things when they are said for people we respect, admire or look up. Similarly, we are also inclined to believe things more quickly when they align we pre-established world views, or favours a narrative you are more inclined to believe in.

(Yes I admitted how that means this work and others fall into this category, the reason they are as long as they are is because I try to at least to be able to justify my position in some way, and lay all what I think in case someone wants to debate me on it.)

My point with all of this, is that the reason why Miguel cannot see the holes in his own theory as he explains it, is because he is biased by the narrative he has done in his head.

I said this a million times already and I will say it again: No one believes in this more than Miguel, while I think Jess and Peter believe some things and are doubtful with others, Miguel believes all the way.

And just like some missionary people going too far, he can justify all the things he is doing because of this. Because is for the "greater good," and as long as it is for that reason, slamming teens into the train while screaming "you are a mistake!" Is all to save the multiverse.

But we aren't seeing a guy convinced to do things the hard way because sometimes tough situations demand desperate measures. We are seen a man try to cope with his guilt so poorly he created an entire unit dedicated to preserve this idea.

This is horrifying.

And now everything he has done colours different, because let me tell you, if you think too hard about his behaviour now looks a lot more authoritative and insane.

Projection is NOT a great Look Miguel

You know? I firmly believe a lot of people in Miguel's side are biased by his angsty demeanour, by his looks, by the power he has. This isn't to say I am not biased, is just that is not in that direction.

Not gonna lie I can't see this guy throwing stuff and don't remember a couple of temper tantrums my dad has done.

Regardless of my biases, I believe is for this reason I can say that honestly? I find embarrassing that Miguel throws things like that.

Again, I feel these scenes changed a lot the context once you put together that canon isn't part of saving the universe, and that Miguel is getting so worked up about something that until I see the contrary, is a theory he came up by himself with no other backing.

Which means he is throwing stuff at people for no good reason, getting worked up to intense levels that are not appropriate; all while being the boss that doesn't like to be questioned.

Honestly this part isn't exactly necessary on cult leaders, but I would say it happens.

(Again, I don't want to call this necessarily a cult; regardless of how much I think it fits the bill. There are multiple criteria, and I can't evaluate everything.)

One way or another, Miguel's reactions aren't anything good. Think about it, if your boss threw things around when he was angry, would you consider that safe?

Because you know what I consider the most telling part of all of this? Neither when Miguel throws the trashcan, nor when he throws the console, has anyone being surprised about this behaviour.

Let me repeat this; even if this wasn't about Miles, Miguel apparently is known for this enough that no one is phased.

Forget that they are super heroes, I don't think is a great look when the leader of your organization gets so angry he can't think straight, to the point he reaches the wildest conclusions.

This is another reason why I think the mental health in this institution has to be shit, 1) You can't have a harmful belief that enforces suffering and have good mental health, is not feasible. 2) I don't care if Miguel is the boss, or is probably his decision not getting help; is downright embarrassing he is let to do these things and no one questions if he is out of line.

Remember, this shouldn't be a dictatorship, regardless if this was Miguel's idea and operation, if you can't question the leader even if he is wrong; that's tyranny, and all just needs the boss to be wrong once for things to go south.

Now imagine when the entire system is flawed.

Now, the following part feels like I may be repeating myself, but the previous part was about how these actions are bad; and the second one is about why having mental health issues isn't a defence,

I imagine by this point, perhaps someone may want to come out of the woodwork's and say "But you are being completely unfair! Miguel is clearly hurting about this, he is not thinking clearly! That's why he screams to Miles that he is a mistake, he is projecting!"

(Sigh.) You know? I don't think there is a lot of people who would seriously try to say that about someone making a theory like this is still justified to do what he does, because he is clearly trying to substitute reality with his own, but because I had gotten WAY TOO MANY TIMES the "oh poor Miguel/Peter they are traumatized!" I am going to do the thing that is the real reason this post will be controversial.

Because disregarding your mental health to the point is hurting you and affecting others IS BAD TOO.

HEAR ME OUT!

In real life, there are complications like not having money, not having resources you can go to, maybe you are living with an abusive person who will not let you get any help- Things are very complicated, and there are many reasons you are stuck.

This isn't Miguel's case, for starters.

The guy clearly has money, he even has a spider-man psych which means the guy knows how the secret identity goes and has a psychological degree, so you can say he has an available, viable help just right around the corner. He is also a middle-aged man, meaning he should know better.

Because here is the thing, for all the dumb shit Gwen has done, she is a traumatized teen with not the best support, not adults she can rely on, and has a dad which copy mechanism is "I have a job to do," which is the same thing she does. I can believe she doesn't know any better, and will not take the best decisions either. I did my own fair of mistakes at that age so I can't talk.

What is Miguel's excuse? I am sorry, but I feel when you are at that age, when you have a responsibility this big, (that let's not forget everybody, HE CHOSE THIS, no one forced it onto him.) You need to be able to look in yourself and know when you can lead or not, when you can be trusted with big decisions or not. By this point in your life, you shouldn't rely on other people to tell you need help. If you are so much in your own head you are not seeing what's in front of you, that's a problem you need to fix.

You could try to argue that at that point he obviously will not see it, but 1) Honestly people let him get away with it, as we can see. 2) Do we know he would listen, considering this situation?

That doesn't mean letting him go rampant, that means "we took the executive decision you aren't fit as a leader." I am not joking here, Elon Musk was kicked out of paypal for less dumb shit and that's saying something.

I had heard so many excuses over the years about angry men that refuse to address their attitude issues because, "he had a rough childhood," "his father was absent," "he is stressed about work." All while being told that you need to grit your tear and bear it.

I can't take seriously a guy who has the money and the means to recover, yet refuses to confront reality because is more comfortable to fabricate something in your mind.

ESPECIALLY NOT when he is involving more people into his twisted system, that perpetuates people having MORE TRAUMA, all to justify his own.

All, while putting the multi-verse in danger, because he decided to take this task upon himself yet using his own flawed narrative.

And you know why I think Miguel being wrong in multiple things, (his theory, behaviour, literally throwing Gwen for questioning him and "letting him go" and not for disobeying- seriously why throw a way the justifiable reason if it isn't meant to be something?) Is not bad writing in my opinion, is because-

THAT'S THE ENTIRE POINT~!

Notice the funny thing about all of these scenes? All of them have Miguel showing being in the wrong.

Miles is telling Miguel it was the Spot, because it literally was; the black matter started way before and he saw it.

Miles IS Spider-man because he has earned that title, and not by doing a checklist of pre-approved events to see if he fits or not the bill.

Miguel is wrong because he is literally mad at Gwen for questioning him, and is insisting Gwen let Miles go; which is funny because PETER was the one in close quarters with Miles, and had a much better chance of capturing him.

But he isn't given any a reprimand for his behaviour, he gets scotch free while Gwen is being blamed for that blunder; and hey isn't something very traditional of corrupt systems of power favour those close to the inner circle while the "problematic members" are blamed for the mistakes of others?

And you can see all the other mistakes I had laid down already.

Because Miguel is the antagonist.

He is a man so blinded by guilt he has created a whole system made to keep it intact, is absolutely absurd to realize how crazy everything sounds once you put all of these pieces together.

Yet the point of this story is how even while having the most noble of reasons, if you are so focused on the past you are forced to make it your future, you may miss the opportunities out there to make it better.

Just like someone living in an unjust society, convinced it needs to perpetuate the status quo because anything else would mean the end of the world as we know it.

It really shows how sad and twisted this can be.

Oof, that got a little heavy huh? Sorry about that, is hard not to get intense.

Still feel a little crazy seeing the parallels about cults because I don't think the team realized how much this is hammering home with that; or maybe they do and I am underestimating them.

Thank you for anyone who came along in this ready! As always if you have the chance please support my ko-fi, and if you can't, please share this post around!

[tempestgnostic]

On Therianthropy

or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Label

As with all identity groups, the therian community has dealt with its fair share of misinformation, ignorance, and exclusivity throughout its storied history. For quite some time, I felt connected to the label—in that profound way when something just fits—yet, I wasn’t certain if I fit the bill. I had seen the common misconception that therians were limited to only “Earth animals.” There are many issues with this definition, and plenty of folks have gone over this already. This discussion between irritatedandroid and spiritus-sonne was one of the first posts I saw that gave me some background on this misconception, and it struck a chord with me.

As I began to look into it more, I kept finding challenges to what I thought I knew about therianthropy. Below is a snippet of the forum post that ultimately led me to identify with ‘therian’ as a werewolf rather than ‘otherkin.’

You can find the page right here if you’d like to check it out for yourself! The author is Lynna Landstreet/Lynx Canadensis at time of posting. (9/18/1999 on alt.horror.werewolves)

This might get a little lengthy, so here’s your courtesy readmore.

This word, ‘liminality,’ is everything that I am. Liminality, balance, breaking down false dichotomies—this is what it means for me to be a werewolf. As a quick disclaimer, there are almost certainly werewolves out there whose self-perception is similar to mine, but they use ‘otherkin’ instead. That’s completely fine! As who-is-page points out in this post, “While it’s important to understand the definitions of various labels for a variety of reasons, these labels are not the end-all be-all to what you can or cannot call yourself or identify yourself by.”

I’ve written previously about how my werewolf identity is deeply intertwined and ultimately inseparable from my queer identity and my experiences as an autistic person. I don’t just toe the line between person and animal—I practically live in the split tongue of therianthropy. I’ve made a home at the crossroads as an autistic, nonbinary butch who’s had top surgery and is on HRT, who rejects boxes and binaries like the plague.

I embrace the ways in which I challenge norms, call out injustice, ask “Why?” and “Why not?” of my society. It’s the reason I named myself Taliesin, after the influential Brittonic poet and bard. He lives on as a creative genius and master satirist, and—according to legend—a figure who can be invoked and channeled by poets who continue his legacy. I carry on the name of a trickster figure who connected with the universal creative spirit—the Awen—and aim to do the same myself whenever I create art of all kinds.

I see my own ‘purpose’ in life as self-defined, not fated, and I find strength in the fact that I can be part of an ever-shifting process of change. Above all, it is transformation—the divine lesson of The Werewolf—that lies at the heart of my therianthropy, and that’s pretty damn therian, isn’t it? The word resonates with me almost as much as my own name, and that’s enough for me.

I encourage all of us to consider how our language can help us understand each other, and how the hard-and-fast rules and restrictions proposed by even the most well-meaning folks can be counterintuitive. It’s not that any label can “just mean anything” — rather, labels can offer a general framework to describe and relate our experiences to others. A label should be the start of a sentence, not the period at the end.

I’ll close on my favorite part of Page’s post, linked above: “Identity is unique, it’s not something that can be charred well-done and then flipped into a tupperware container for tomorrow’s lunch.”

[mostlikelytobeagainstcapitalism]

Little thinking about the main characters of the trilogy and how they all somehow resemble each other.

Like Elizabeth/Barbossa, Will/Jack (not Davy Jones surprisingly) and James/Davy Jones all show the two sides of the same coin (for the last pair I will sadly not elaborate further from this post, which does a better analysis than I ever could).

Even if we don't really know much about barbossa's childhood/backstory, it's pretty clear that in spite of choosing a career such as piracy he always aimed for a more luxurious and wealthy lifestyle (more like a nobleman than an outlaw), which is very close to the way elizabeth has been raised. They both also excel in politics: elizabeth by having a close relationship with a politician (her father) and probably learning from his behaviour; barbossa by being the most reasonable and a great poker face while negotiating (like at the brethren court in awe). They both expect the others to follow laws and rules, but are so quick to bend them to their will or directly dismiss their importance. Also they are the most obvious choice for a leader role, thanks especially to their speech abilities (I swear elizabeth watched barbossa give his best speech inside isla de muerta in cotbp and knew she had to do the same at the first chance she got).

On top of everything I love their nature, which is the same: they are the real pirates, the only two who actually act like pirates with threats and by killing without guilt, who put their own wellbeing above all else, who are blunt and ruthless and cruel and selfish. They scheme and do mind games but their priority is to be in charge of their own destiny (I could quote both of them on this) and never again be controlled or submissed to others (both 8w7, of course). Really the only non-pirates trait they share is not being superstitious and not really believing in all that cannot be perceived, but even they learn their lesson.

For Will/Jack is pretty obvious that jack was will's mentor. When we first meet will he's literally a himbo with great swordfight skills and puppy eyes for elizabeth, nothing more than that. He should really thank jack, who somehow managed to put some sense into that pretty head of his.

They both start their life marked by a pirate fate: both their fathers (teague and bootstrap bill) had chosen piracy and, without knowing it, they ended up condemning their sons. No matter how much will and jack want another life, they both wind up at sea at the end. Though they try to lead an honest life (jack always at sea but at the service of lawful men, will as a blacksmith), they both get robbed of it by the law, all because they follow their conscience and don't allow innocent (or not that guilty for jack's hanging) people to die. They both are forced to become pirates and in doing so they get deeply bound to the Dutchman: jack by making a pact with its captain for 13 years, and then being the reason why said captain loses his position; will by replacing said captain and following what has always been his fate.

They of course share their unhinged side (like will's sniffing dresses, and jack's whole being). They somehow also think in the same very intricate way (while elizabeth and barbossa's is a way more direct approach) and in spite of their desire to appear so detached or careless of what is happening (especially will in awe), they truly want nothing more than a chance to prove they are more than what they are born and to regain their freedom (will's is elizabeth, of course).

I know this has been done before, but I wanted to put into words what I think of these characters. Also I've never seen will and jack compared (if I remember well?) and wished to show some things I noticed during my endless rewatches.

[moodywyrm]

I didn’t know you wrote for vi omg! Could you do vi with a reader who has chronic pain? I get reeeeally bad muscle cramps at night (mostly in my legs) and all I’ve ever wanted is a partner who will hold me and massage them and get my heating pads and pain meds UGH I know she’d be so fucking sweet

yeah I really love vi!! I would love to write about her more!! her and sevika, honestly. also just want to preface this that, while I do experience pretty bad leg cramps like once a month, I don't really have chronic pain, so if anything I say is incorrect please tell me!!!

Vi would be so concerned the first time you two slept in the same bed and she woke up to you wincing, trying not to cry because fucking hell it hurts. She's so scared that your hurt, but you're just like "this happens, it's okay! I just need to massage my leg and put heat on it until it hopefully subsides!" and she takes that as her cue to massage your leg for you, laying your heating pads over the blanket and working at the muscle, handing you pain meds and a water bottle from her side of the bed. sweet girl <3 her hands are so warm and rough and she's so thorough with it that it works faster than when you do it yourself, so you're just convinced she's magical <3

the next morning, you're walking pretty slow, because even if the cramps are over, the mental anxiety that they'll come back combined with the aching soreness and residual tension in your legs is making you incredibly cautious (this feeling literally always makes me want to cry bc I cannot handle the anxiety). And Vi catches on, letting you cling to her and effectively serving as a girlfriend-sized walking stick, helping you around the apartment as your legs get used to walking for the day. she's just lets you use her however you need, absolutely dedicated to making your life a little bit easier.

after that, she also starts registering the anxiety you tend to get before bed, because even though you're used to the cramps, the possibility that you'll be woken up by the pain still makes you antsy. so she's extra sweet with you, snuggling you, making sure your heating pads are ready to go, filling up your water bottle and placing your pain meds within reach.

also!! I think about boxer! Vi a lot, so if we're putting this in that universe, I imagine she gets muscle cramps fairly often? Literally just a hazard of the job, especially when the job basically depends on her muscles. So she had initially learned how to deal with them for her aches, and it translated really well into taking care of you <3 Her hands are fucking godly when it comes to massaging the muscles and easing out the pain, and nothing has ever made her so happy as seeing you relax under her touch, the crease in your brows smoothing out as she helps work the pain out of your body.

Vi would also never make you feel guilty about it, since she wakes up in the middle of the night to take care of you. She'd do it over and over and over again if it meant you didn't have to deal with the pain alone. to quote Bill here, you are her purpose!! and she would do anything to take care of you!!

I hope this was okay!!! I think this is the first time I've written a reader with chronic pain in mind? so I really hope it was okay! and if anything was wrong please tell me!!

[bengiyo]

The Warp Effect Ep 12 (Finale) Stray Thoughts

The week of finales continues! I was forever changed by My School President. Will this show change me as well?

Last time, things finally came to a head at Jedi and Rose's wedding, which used prom as its theme. Jedi and Rose continued to make me believe in long term romance. See-ew committed the cardinal sin of proposing at someone's wedding. Mollie and Nim managed to reconcile a bit. Joe and Army danced in public, and are building their romance. Alex learned that the sex ed teacher was his bio dad and refused to forgive him for abandoning his mom. Alex tried to reconcile with Jean, but Jean refused. Kat is hanging out with Tony now. Alex learned that the camera came from his bio dad.

As always, so much happens on this show.

I do enjoy the sci-fi conceits of someone experiencing this huge period of time, and then returning to an earlier moment. Everyone else being so confused amuses me.

I also like Alex immediately going to reassure his little brother.

Clize and Sing are so funny together. I hope we see them paired again.

Alex getting ahead of the Mollie issue by kissing her himself is unexpected, but makes sense to keep it from becoming a rift between Nim and Mollie.

Oh, Alex, please don't out Army and Joe.

Yep, they're still closeted jocks, so yeah that's definitely the same outcome.

Jojo definitely likes Kill Bill, Vol. 2.

I love Jedi and Rose so much. Mark and Best look so comfortable together.

Have we not learned our lessons about drinking too much??

Jojo, why have you joined the ranks of people forcing me to witness vomit??

Ah, nice. Shielding the gays is the right move.

I swear if Jean gets expelled still because of these photos....

Fah is also so funny. She actually works really well with New. Cutting off the music when she passes out was fantastic comedic timing.

Alex is still a people pleaser, but I like him being confident about helping people.

I actually like the chemistry between New and Fah a lot.

I'm never getting over the BTS clip where Clize slaps Sing so hard that he walked away stunned.

This elevator make out competition is peak Jojo. Best, Clize, Mark, and Sing are so amazing.

It's a bit contrived, but I really like how far a little earnest validation is carrying all of these couples.

Even Sarran gets a nod.

Oh, I do love creating the intro at the end.

Absolutely comedic poses for Jean and Alex's consensual first time. Still, that was much nicer than what happened originally.

This friend group is honestly impressive if they all not only stayed in their pairs, they also remained friends for a decade.

Kinda hope Alex gets the memories of the better ten years and doesn't have to piece those together too.

Final Verdict: 10, Highly Recommended. This show was an absolute delight from start to finish. I cannot overstate how impressive it is that this show remained legible despite the sheer volume of threads it was managing. This show managed to be funny and sexy, while still continuing the mission to make people more comfortable with their bodies and aware of their own sexual health. It also managed to accomplish those educational goals without feeling like an after school special. It's also the queerest show we've gotten to enjoy in quite some time. I'd say in some ways it cared more about queer issues than some of the BLs we've watched. Please watch and enjoy this.

[alcoholandcakes]

𝓢/𝓸 𝔀𝓱𝓸’𝓼 𝓪 𝓹𝓱𝓪𝓻𝓶𝓪𝓬𝓲𝓼𝓽

<Dazai Osamu, Chuuya Nakahara, Atsushi Nakajima, Akutagawa Ryunnosuke, Yosano Akiko>

Dazai Osamu

- you have a lot of medicine at home

- please lock it away from him so he won’t try another attempt

- you only keep those ones around that he cannot overdose on

- “ HOW CRUEL OF YOU BELLADONNA? YOU DONT EVEN LOVE ME ANYMORE NOW DO YOU?”

- “ osamu I do love you but I won’t give you pills on which you can overdose- get that out of your mind right in this instant!”

- you can be pretty strict with him

- but it’s because you’re worried for him

- when he’s sick you always make sure that if you give him medication he doesn’t drink it down with alcohol

- he likes whiskey a little too much

- all in all he is fascinated by the fact that you know every medication, their side effects and what they’re for

- and he likes how you don’t allow him to just take it without your presence but he wouldn’t admit it

- it shows Him you care

- plus you bring him free bandages so it’s a win-win situation for him

Chuuya Nakahara

- you don’t need to worry about him trying to overdose with the pills you keep at home

- but you need to worry about him trying to drink it down with FUCKING WINE

- you always need to remind him to not drink wine

- one time he was a bit irritated and reminded him he started yelling

- “ DO YOU THINK IM THAT DUMB TO NOT KNOW THAT I SHOULDNT DRINK WINE WHEN TAKING IT?!”

- you just stayed calm looking at him with doe eyes and he apologized right away

- there wouldn’t be way too many arguments about it but he would get mad once in a while

- once he got sick and you were at work he tried to find himself some pills but there were so many he literally got lost 😭

- he needed to call you for assistance

- you assisted him as much as you could

- he loves how you can tell him right away what medication is for what

Atsushi Nakajima

- he doesn’t get what medication is for what so he keeps his distance

- you don’t need to worry about him really

- when he’s sick you stay at home with him because he won’t take pills

- he would rather suffer

- you usually give him only painkillers nothing more or herbal tea

- that helps him, he has a strong immunity

- you would even teach him what is for what

- he gladly learns because you’re passionate about it

- he loves to learn about it really

- so he knows the primary ones like frontin, Xanax, ibalgin

Akutagawa Ryunnosuke

- he’s pretty sick

- he has problems with his lungs so yeah

- you actually met him when he went to buy some medicine

- once when he came again you gave him your number on the bill with the text “call me up if ya wanna”

- well he called you out to go on a tea with him

- so you went out and got to know each other better but you mostly talked about pills and what he should take instead if he had bad side effects

- you started calling him after work and brought him his medication without him needing to pay

- first he looked weirdly at you and thought you wanted something from him

- he hardly realized that it was only your kindness

- you did this pretty often because you felt like he needed it

- after you got together with him and move in with him you made sure to always have at home what he needs

- when his condition gets worse you always stay home with him even when he’s so stubborn wanting to go to work

- but you force him to stay at home so he gets atleast a bit better

- he really loves you for it but doesn’t wanna show it

- you always take such a good care of him and now gin doesn’t need to worry so much because he’s in good hands

Yosano Akiko

- when she was getting a re-fill she met you

- she really liked you (love at first sight)

- she gave you her number right away that day

- you called her at the end of your shift and things just happened

- now she doesn’t even need to come to the pharmacy

- she just calls you and at the end of her shift you bring her the medication she needs

- she just loves the fact that your interest kinda match

- you can talk about work and you’ll understand each other

- you guys take care of each other

- when she has time she will bring you lunch to work

A/n: so rn I’m having ideas so yeah<3

I hope you guys stay well hydrated and safe I luv you guys so much <33

28.08.2022- Cali

[shera-dnd]

THIS IS THE PART WHERE I BEG FOR MONEY!

...

Okay but in all seriousness that's pretty much what I'm doing here

This year has just been A MESS for me. From burnout to breaking my arm to my dearest editor getting covid to now ANOTHER BURNOUT

Honestly I should have learned by now that 1- whenever I try to over compensate for big delays by working extra hard that only results in more delays and 2- whenever I set up a deadline for myself I will miss it even if I was completely on track until the very last moment

Yeah uh shit is fucked. I have not done any writing over the last week no matter how hard I try, and my bills do not give a shit about that, so I'm very much broke right now and cannot pay for them

So uh... fun times all around

And that is why this is me begging for money, because I don't have any new works to show for it. What I do have is a lot of old works... in fact I have 90 fics on AO3 totaling to 360k words, or just about the entirety of Chronicles of Narnia

So for the next few weeks I'll be reblogging "old classics" from my collection while trying to bring attention to... well my financial situation

I still wanna get one last fic out which is like mostly done, but after that I'm taking a much MUCH needed two week break, before getting back to my usual schedule... hopefully... like please god let that happen

ANYWAYS please consider donating to my ko-fi or spreading the message to help get me through the month

[smokestarrules]

Titan Trappers & Witch Hunters

something something cycle of abuse indoctrination and manipulation

(full post under the cut because it gets lengthy)

--

So let’s talk about the parallels between Bill - and the Titan Trappers’ mentalities as a whole - and Philip Wittebane, Witch Hunter extraordinaire. 

They’re both secretive communities (you can call Philip a community of one), a close-knit status quo in which glory is given to the members - in stages, of course, and only when the individual has done something worthy of that glory. 

Thankfully, Bill and Philip could never end up working together, at least not in the long run - simply because Bill and the Titan Trappers themselves are in fact Witches, and therefore working with them is fundamentally against Philip’s morals. Funnily enough however, while they could never assimilate into each other, their indoctrination tactics are almost exactly the same, though shifted a bit for their differing circumstances. 

The Titan Trappers wear the skulls and coats of her enemy - “you gotta look like a Titan to trap one” - both to lure in potential prey (a tactic that which, considering that Titans are seemingly all-but extinct, seems to have worked well) and also to recognize each other, pick each other out from the crowd. Tarak saw King, and he immediately assumed King was one of them, simply because of his skull. 

Additionally, there is another reason for the skulls that goes beyond simply a way for estranged members of the group to recognize each other, and that is this - trophies. These people are hunters. Trappers. They are proud of their history and of the culture they've created, and so they wear the spoils on their own bodies like any hunters do. 

They’re wearing the skulls of children, but they don’t mind it, because it’s simply a fact of life; more than that, it’s a thing of pride for their lives. 

On the other hand, Belos does somewhat the same thing himself. He mutilates himself for the prospect of blending into the crowd, of looking like a Witch himself, despite his abhorrent hatred for the species. And he does this for one reason and one reason alone: it’s convenient for him. He’s been around for a very long time, and he’s learned that being a Human attracts attention. Due to his less-than Witch-friendly goals, he eventually decided that it would cause him less suspicion if he were a Witch instead, and so he’d taken on the appearance of his mortal enemy. 

And why? It’s because to Philip, the end justify the means. He says, “I just need to live long enough to see this through,” because that is all he cares about - the extinction of Witches (sound familiar?). He doesn’t care about looking like a Human because he isn’t really a factor - though of course he’s still clearly selfish; the man is a walking contradiction - and all that matters to him is that his plans work in the end. 

Theres also the Coven Sigils as a whole - while also imperative to Philip’s final plan, represent how strict the Boiling Isles have become under Philip’s rule. Coven Sigils represent two narratives; the one Philip tells the world, and the one that Hunter and Luz learned while in the depths of Philip’s mind. The first is this, and the reason known to society: they are so that Witches may only ever use one type of magic and cannot hurt those around them with Wild Magic. Simple. The second reason, the one that only Philip knew, is this: the Coven Sigils will be used during the Day of Unity to assist in draining the Witches with them on. 

It is the second reason that Philip likely finds most important, but that doesn’t negate the first; in fact, it only strengthens the idea. Coven Sigils exist for the Day of Unity, yes, but they’re also a rather convenient tool that allows Philip’s one-magic law to be upheld, rather than undermining his authority. 

Both Philip and Bill use the same strategies to uphold their ideologies; their mindsets can’t be questioned because they’re infallible, obviously, and therefore they - and subsequently their actions - are always in the right. They do what they do for the greater good... except it’s not, it’s for their own good; they just refuse to acknowledge that facet of themselves. 

And then there’s their dealings with the Collector. 

Many have already pointed out the similarities between Philip and Bill in many of their (potential and literal) interactions with the Collector, even to the point where Philip’s very palace is able to be compared against the Trappers’ residence as well, which raises a few concerning questions - of who really is in charge here. 

Something that I want to focus on, however, is the fact that both these strong powers - Titan Trappers and Philip alike - believe entirely that the Collector is/is going to be helping them. 

For Philip, it’s all about the Day of Unity, of which it is implied that the Collector is the one who even showed him that it existed in the first place. The Day of Unity is going to be Philip’s day of reckoning; his final revenge on all the hateful, damning Witches that he’s had the displeasure of living alongside for 400+ years. That is his final goal. 

On the other hand, for the Trappers, it’s “glory,” it’s being seen and acknowledged by someone that they’ve been risen to believe is their god, at least a god-like being (rather than the Titans themselves, which is another meta altogether). They seek the last Titan not only for themselves, but to release the Collector from their “prison” of sorts. They’re clearly more emotionally involved with him than Philip is, and yet Philip seems to talk to the Collector one-on-one more often. 

Somehow, in the 400+ years between Elsewhere & Elsewhen and Edge of the World, two things have happened to... “Round Boy.” One: the Trappers have managed to have it in their possession, despite Philip having had it last we saw. Two: it is now broken in half. 

Now, barring the concept that this is simply a second Round Boy (which is possible), something that should also be noted that this was the artifact that may have shown Philip when and what exactly the Day of Unity is, and this artifact is clearly also able to be used as a way to contact the Collector. Now, though, it’s been cracked. Whether that crack was caused by external means or Philip himself, who knows, but what is clear is this: both Philip and the Titan Trappers highly regard the Collector as both a force to reckoned with and a potential companion.  

They're both actively working towards making the Collector’s dreams a reality. The Titan Trappers with “free[ing] him from his prison,” and Philip’s with “revenge,” a revenge that is one the Collector implies they and Philip will share. Either way, both Bill and Philip are both working with the Collector - and for the Collector, though those vary between the two. 

Interestingly enough, they seem to be going about it in different ways. Bill and his Trappers search for the last one remaining - King - and they plan to “sacrifice” him (sound familiar?) to ensure the release of their idol, the Collector. Philip, on the other hand, seeks to “reunite Bonesborough with the [Boiling Isles’] Titan.” We know that on some level, some part of the Titan is still alive. Either its heart or bile sac is still pumping - that which Philip has in his possession - and its consciousness still has an impact on the Isles themselves, such as Philip taking years to find the elemental Glyphs, but Luz being able to find them all in mere weeks. 

Their goals are different, their tactics near-identical, and they’re both likely being duped by the Collector. Such is the way of those who refuse to consider broader ideas, I suppose.  

[zorkayaplus]

I want to talk about several things happening to me because it's something I do care about and would like to address personally.

In the last couple of weeks I have been... very distant, very easily annoyed, and I've been not engaging that much with any of my friends which caused my to spiral even more. I tried to fix it in different ways, but it only forced me to hide back into my shell and become miserable because of how I tried to fix things... that most of them were out of my control, which means they were not fixable.

Tumblr is a hobby and I know it, but what I care about immensely are my friends here. The people behind each blog. I want to be honest that I just got hit with too many bad things on the week of Zarina's birthday and then the whole shadowban thing just fully destroyed me. I lost the wish to talk, to be happy, to enjoy my time speaking with anyone. Now I have issues with real life things that I cannot fix while not being in the US.

I just... lost so, so much passion that traveled into my perception of my behavior and view of the internet, made me dive into games, and be very frustrated with myself. I got stupidly jealous and envious about stupid things and I stepped away further into myself and it just happened. I suck at handling too much stress and I sometimes dig myself into a ditch for more than a month before I blow up. And, well, I did. At home. Not the best time.

But because I didn't speak to anyone, I just want to tell everyone that I don't know how long this state will continue. I'm trying to get my passion for writing and for ZARINA back because I do NOT want to lose her as a muse, as a character, as a story. I hope that you all won't thnk that I'm ignoring or stopped being interested, etc. I know many of you understand, but it's also helping my anxiety for me to establish that. I simply.. cannot beam with energy. I don't have it in me. But I want you all to know that I lurk, I love seeing you all on my dash, I love reading everything.

Special love goes to @avaere, @thornicidxs, @bitterseadrop , @etherealguard , @sunlessea , @londonfallen for just being awesome always. please send these people so, so much love because they are fantastic and they are talented, loving, and absolutely fucking amazing. I'll be honest that I mostly respond to a very specific number of people so... yeah. Just wanted to thank for being awesome.

On this note, I'm gonna try to pick myself back up but gently and carefully now without trying to push myself. It's what I do to myself and never fucking learn, but learning curve... Bit by bit. Games be my saviors these days. Maybe my laptop will handle Baldur's Gate 3 after I... pay off my brother's bills with my parents and also do 1 more thing I promised to do... But anyways! Stay awesome and stay safe. :)