#i don't know how to explain how stupid you are milo but you're off the charts buddy

[plutothe-pup]

Long, Long Time || An Unsent Letter to Luca

His heart panged incredibly hard in his chest, and the urge to start sobbing again rose in his throat but he swallowed it back. If only just because with that pang of endearing love, he felt an even bigger swell of something else: Guilt. His gaze drifted up - for just a second - landing on Luca’s abandoned pile of presents. Of the object left untouched, that Milo had so quickly put his hands on Luca to stop them from looking now. Maybe you should wait until later to read that. He needed to get that letter back. It wasn’t the time. Milo thought it had been, but .. no. It was clear he had been wrong. Completely wrong. It couldn’t be read. It couldn’t leave this house. It wouldn’t be hard either… Milo was good at stealing, regrettably. Incredible at lifting wallets and purses and watches without being caught. Slipping an envelope out of Luca’s possession or just out of the pile of gifts while they weren’t looking would be simple. Too easy. And Luca was too kind. @lucathedreamer

Merry Christmas, Luca!

Even though this is our second Christmas here, it feels like the first one we probably both understand a little better, right? It's been a crazy year, but I'm thankful that you've been by my side the entire time - even when I try to push you away (sorry lol). So thank you for being such an amazing friend, and for trusting me enough to be able to share parts of yourself and your story with me.

It's really strange to think that when you walked up to me at the park that first day that this is where we'd be all this time later. It's also weird to think of how similar our stories are, and yet how opposite they are at the same time. It's... kind of neat actually that we could share so much in common and yet be able to teach each other so many new things too.

You're one of my best friends, Luca - and I care about you an awful lot. So you know there's nothing more that I want to see than for my friends to be well, right? It's something I want more than my own happiness. I would give everything I have, and everything I ever would have if it meant that my friends got what they want. It would never even be a choice.

More than anything else, I just want you to be happy, Luca - I want you to be loved. Appreciated. Felt and understood. I want you to feel comfortable with yourself and with others. I want you to be able to experience all the things you deserve to see and do, and for you to be able to invent and draw and create. You're so incredibly smart and talented, and it's funny because I don't think you even see it. Not everyone can do the things you do, Luca. So I know you'll end up doing great things in the future.

It's also no secret that I care about you a lot.

I think I always have.

You know, I never understood how people could think 'love at first sight' existed, but sometimes when I think of you, I don't think that's such a weird idea anymore. Simply because the second I met you, it was like we'd already been friends for a very long time - and maybe in a past life we were; because there's no way that I should have felt so comfortable with someone so quickly. But you always know the right thing to say to make me laugh. You listen when I feel like other people aren't. (And you don't listen when you know you shouldn't). You stayed by my side and understood, even when everyone else was angry. You gave me chance after chance, even when I felt like I didn't deserve it.

We were literally raised to be each other's enemies, right? It's insane to think about but by all logic in the world, we should hate each other...

...but I think I'm in love with you, Luca and the craziest thing is I think you might be in love with me too. I see the way you look at me - because I look at you the exact same way. Which should make this simple, right? If two people care about each other this much, it just makes sense.

But nothing about my life makes sense - and I know it's so incredibly unfair, but so would be letting myself act on those feelings when I know that everything you deserve, I can't give you.

I can't hold you when you're sad. I can't kiss you goodnight. I can't pull you close and let those words I'm too afraid to say translate through every heartbeat against your chest. We can't experiences all the 'firsts' of dating together like we experienced the 'firsts' of friendships and general life.

The worst part is I know you're already shaking your head and thinking 'it doesn't matter', or 'I wouldn't mind'. But I know you would. Maybe not right away. But years without more than a simple touch? Years without being able to share affection with your boyfriend, it would get to you. It gets to me. Everyone pretends that it wouldn't, I guess to make me feel better but... Believe me.

You don't deserve to sacrifice that much for me.

I am so, so sorry I can't give you this, but I just want you to be happy, Luca.

So please don't waste yourself on someone like me, not when you have so much potential for the future and I don't. I will never be even a fraction of the person you deserve to have by your side. You deserve someone so much better.

You deserve everything, but I certainly don't deserve you.

I just hope you can forgive me for that, and that maybe somehow you and I can still be best friends too.

[wh0refornikolailantsov]

Prompt: "You’re jealous, aren’t you?”

For Nina x Reader please!!

Couldn't Love Anybody Else - Nina Zenik

Content Warnings: Insecurity And Doubt. No Beta/Proof Reading.

"I think it's best that I go," Nina tells Kaz, "we know I can be very persuasive." You smile, knowing exactly how persuasive Nina is capable of being.

"No," Kaz says plainly before looking to you, "you will go."

"Why?" You ask, and bite your tongue at the snapping rate of the question.

"Because you have the expertise to get you in," Kaz says, "and you're exactly his type."

"I resent the way you said that Brekker," Nina says. "Besides I am everyone's type."

"Nina, I need your skills elsewhere," Kaz says, "now go home, get sleep, tomorrow we have a job to do."

You know better than to argue with Kaz Brekker, but that doesn't stop Nina from trying. Once she finally exhausts herself from arguing with him, you hold the door open for her and start the short walk back.

Jesper stops you on the way, asking if either of you have recently set eyes on Wylan, Nina is uncharacteristically quiet, clearly thinking something over and over. "What dumb thing have you done now?" You ask. Jesper tilts his head side to side.

"I didn't do anything dumb," he says, and then upon some contemplation, "but I did say something dumb."

"What could you possibly say that is dumber than things you've come out with before?" You ask, trying not to let your gaze linger on Nina's blank expression too long.

"I was talking about missing Milo," Jesper explained. You nod.

"The goat," you say. Jesper rubs his neck all sheepish.

"Yeah, I am glad you recognised that, turns out that might not have been so obvious to everyone," Jesper says. You sigh.

"You didn't prefix it with, by the way I am talking about a goat?" you ask. Jesper takes his head.

"I would clip you one if I didn't think you were faster than me," you warn him.

"It's stupid, I know, and now I can't find him to explain," he says.

"I'd check the night market," you tell him. Jesper frowns.

"We have a night market?" he looks deeply unnerved.

"In the nice side of Ketterdam, he sometimes goes there when he is stressed, they make good snacks, and they sometimes import good powders," you explain. Jesper scans you up and down in a glance. "Yes, I listen to your boyfriend, now go and apologise while he is still your boyfriend."

"Received," Jesper says before dashing off into the dark.

"Dumbass," you whisper, you look to Nina, hoping for a smile, but she is scrunching up her nose in discontent. You don't try asking until you make it back into your kitchen, and offer Nina some hot chocolate. She shakes her head, not even really registering the question and that's more than enough to have you worried.

"What is it?" You ask.

"Hmm?" Nina says, looking startled out of her thoughts as she looks across the room to you.

"You don't think I can do this job?" you ask her.

"I know you can do this job," she assures you. "I don't like it any though."

"Why spend so much time arguing with Kaz, Nina, you knew it was pointless," you say, leaning against the counter.

"Had to try," she says.

"Why though?" You ask. She presses her hands together and then looks up at the ceiling, she is searching for a reason, a reason that isn't the truth, a reason that sounds more reasonable than the truth, but she fails to find one. "You're jealous, aren't you?"

You had meant about the job, about Kaz putting you in the centre, and asking Nina to pull some background tricks to keep them moving, but the second the words reach her the look of guilt on her face reveals a whole other kind of jealousy, a type you hadn't dared consider. She's jealous that you have to seduce someone as part of the job.

"No," Nina's voice is sturdy but her conviction is lacking. She won't meet your eye as she says it.

"Nina," you sound out her name soft and slow, and she quickly mistakes your empathy or pity and throws you a look. Her arms crossed across her chest and doing her best not to pout.

"Look, you don't have to look at me like that," she says, "I know it's part of the job."

"Nina, I am not looking at you like anything," you defend. She eyes you, not yet convinced. She has flirted her way through jobs before, she has flirted herself out of trouble more times than she can count. But with you it's different, because you didn't flirt for fun, or for the sake of it, you weren't like Nina and Jesper, you'd never got your kicks from watching someone else blush and buckle under the weight of your attention. Flirting was something you'd grown to do, a response to Nina and her charm, a charm that flourished your own. So the idea of Nina watching you work that same charm on someone else, it made her jealous, jealous in a way she hasn't ever really known before. But also protective.

"With your eyes like that," she waves a hand at you before returning it to her side. You've never seen Nina Zenik, Queen of Smiles and Charisma, so... unsure.

"I am looking at you the way I always look at you Nina," you tell her.

"You always look at me with such pity?" she asks. She huffs slightly, moving to cross her arms. "I had always thought it was awe in those pretty eyes of yours, but thank you for correcting me."

"Nina," you tell her, closing the space between the two of you to place your hands gently on her arms. "I never look at you with anything less than utter admiration, and complete reverence."

"Really?" she asks, smile creeping into her pout.

"Nina for a while now, I have been nothing short of ridiculously, and rather desperately, irrevocably in love with you," you say, "have I not made that abundantly clear?"

"Well," she shrugs a shoulder gently, "maybe not abundantly."

"That is on me then treasure, and all I can do is beg your forgiveness for such an egregious duplicity."

"You're just trying to distract me with words now," she teases, "keep going it's working for you."

You laugh, her arms move from being crossed to wrapping around your waist, holding you close to her, as she smiles at you, all forgiven, all argument disarmed. "You know this is just a job to me Nina," you tell her, "this will always just be a job, Ketterdam is not my home, and admittedly neither is Ravka, you are my home, and I will always return to you, you are my only loyalty."

[beepmeowz]

I don't have a library card

But do you mind if I check you out?

I like your skeletal structure, baby

You're an ectomorph, no doubt

Your face is real symmetrical

And your nostrils are so nice

I wish that I was cross-eyed, girl

So I could see you twice

Girl, you smell like Fritos

That's why I'm giving you this hungry stare

You're so hot, you're gonna melt

The elastic in my underwear

I'll bet you're magically delicious

Like a bowl of Lucky Charms

You'd look like Venus de Milo

If I just cut off your arms

What I'm tryin' to say is ...

I wanna be your lover, baby

I need somebody to love

You know I just wanna be your lover, baby

Now, I need somebody to love

Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo

Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo

Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo

Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo

Do you believe in love at first sight

Or should I walk by again?

My love for you'd like diarrhea

I just can't hold it in

Stop, drop and roll now

'Cause baby, you're on fire

I'll bet your outfit

Makes a lot of noise in the drier

You're absolutely perfect

Don't speak now, you might spoil it

Your eyes are even bluer

Than the water in my toilet

Say, has anyone ever told you

You've got Yugoslavian hands?

No, of course not, that would be stupid

Just forget I ever brought it up

The point I'm trying to make is ...

I wanna be your lover, baby

I need somebody to love

You know I just wanna be your lover, baby

Now, I need somebody to love

Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo

Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo

Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo

Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo

I wanna be your Krakatoa

Let my lava flow all over you

I wanna be your anaconda

And your heat-seeking missile too

I wanna be your beef burrito

Am I making this perfectly clear?

I wanna be your love torpedo

Are you picking up the subtle innuendo here?

Uh huh

I hope I'm not being forward

But do you mind if I chew on your butt?

You can tell me truthfully

Am I a steamin' hunk of love now, or what?

There just aren't enough o's in "smooth"

To desribe how smooth I am

Maybe you've seen my picture

It's in the dictionary under "Kablaam!"

My lips are registered weapons

Can I invade your personal space?

You must have fallen from heaven

That would explain how you messed up your face

Well, how'd you get through security?

'Cause, baby, you're the bomb

I'd like to take you home right now

So you can meet my mom

Because I ...

I wanna be your lover, baby

I need somebody to love

You know I just wanna be your lover, baby

Now, I need somebody to love

Girl, you must be Jamaican

Because Jamaican me crazy

Girl, you must be Jamaican (Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo)

Because Jamaican me crazy (Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo)

I wanna be your lover, baby (Girl, you must be Jamaican)

(Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo)

I need somebody to love

(Because Jamaican me crazy) (Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo)

You know I just wanna be your lover, baby

(Girl, you must be Jamaican) (Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo)

Now, I need somebody to love

(Because Jamaican me crazy) (Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo)

Dork.

[nokingsonlyfooles]

And this is why I am insane now

WHY IS IT DISPLAYING LIKE THIS? LITERALLY EVERY OTHER FEATURED IMAGE DISPLAYS IN FULL!

I wanted a better theme. I have spent two days reformatting so I can use this one. I will need to spend many more. BUT THERE IS LITTLE POINT IF THE DAMN THING IS STILL GOING TO GRAB THE CONTROLS LIKE A BOEING 737 MAX AND PLOW ME INTO THE TERRAIN.

I don't even have the strength to explain the little dance I need to do to make my work legible again. I can't actually code a whole website from scratch and it wouldn't matter if I could because that's not how WP works. This stuff I'm doing isn't even future-proof because I can't build a site with the new "site wide editor" interface. The damn thing is almost entirely unusable. If I do it that way I'm gonna look incredibly freakin' generic and I'll still have to reformat everything for the privilege of looking minimalist chic. That sort of thing clashes very badly with my art style, all of it.

I made some new buttons and accordions. They work for now. But I'm incredibly nervous about the way they load. It seems like there's a default that loads first, and then my style loads on top of it like a skin. That is way more complex than it should be and I expect it to break at any time - like everything else broke, necessitating this overhaul. I put a lot of work into getting them like that... I put a lot of work into all of this, but it's getting more and more convoluted and fragile.

I am hoping like hell something about the image loaded wrong the first time and it's just like that in my cache, even though I've changed the name once. I don't have the energy to screw around with my cache on this new computer now. Maybe tomorrow. Well, it's after midnight. Maybe today.

And Milo's cards seem to have vanished. I have a new format for those that is ENTIRELY text-based (I'll have to explain eventually, but I just can't now. It's much less complex and less likely to fail, and it's accessible, but it has little personality and I'm not 100% it works on mobile.) but I need to reformat EVERYTHING. It is taking A LONG TIME. Because of weird errors like the above.

I was so excited for this theme's category tag feature. I can theoretically serve you content so prettily! But, right now, I haven't even successfully reformatted all the new stuff. And Tin Soldier is a train wreck that is only partially legible in dark mode if you're patient.

People who need accessible content, please believe me, I am not trying to screw you. The tools they're willing to let me have are stupid, unless I want to pay hundreds of dollars on spec for various upgrades... And even then they're still gonna be stupid, just with fewer standard features dummied out on purpose. There are no descriptions on the above images or on many at my site because I get so damn tired doing everything else. (Also, the box they give me for typing alt text is comically small.)

I know someone who knows how to code for real and he offered to help, but... Well, first off, this isn't normal code. If it were normal code, I'd be building a little Angelfyre page with nothing more complicated than an image and a midi. And I don't wanna inflict this on anyone.

I don't know what I'm gonna do, but it can't stay like it is. I'll sleep on it and have a look at the options when my brain's working. If it ever works again.

[miaumeiw]

heeheeeheeeee Silas character sheet

● Often says that he is fine (OBVIOUSLY ISNT) or that the blood on his hands is just "forbidden ketchup"

● Very unserious, immature, and stupid when he wants to be (most of the time)

● Only gets serious when his loved ones are in danger or himself

● Pretends to be fine around others just to collapse the moment they leave

● Finds comfort in items from his loved ones, (clothes, pins, etc.)

● Used to play a bit of guitar but forgot how

● He can kind of cry on command, he just has to think about how his loved ones felt when he left them

● His favorite thing is probably some stupid mobile game that he keeps to himself

● Responds to "Bird Boy" or "shithead" on occasion (silly old oc design refrence)

● Absolutely hates Kenny but doesn't mind him much because he keeps Milo safe

● Only says "I love you" to the people he feels actually deserve it

● A total bitch to most other people and only allows certain people to touch him

● One moment he'll be listening to Lights Out by Mindless Self Indulgence and then the next he'll be listening to Castaways by The Backyardigans

● LOVES to rant about his special interests (dinosaurs, bugs, sharks, and ESPECIALLY space)

● If some random person was pretending to be him, just ask what his favorite thing about his boyfriend is. He WILL start ranting about how wonderful and amazing his boyfriend is

● As stated earlier, he is VERY immature. Laughs anytime someone says penis.

● Very good at hiding his emotions. VERY.

● He's a bit scared of fire so he'll just blow on a candle aggressively and go hide.

● He's a very lively person around others but when he's alone he recoils into his mind and just thinks. Best to snap him out of it before he goes on a murderous rampage.

● Likes to talk about the silly "brainworms" that he has. (Secretly just him splitting up his personalities in his head.)

● Often wonders things about the vessel he got thrown in (lore, will explain later) since it

has most of his old features.

● Absolutely LOVES his boyfriend 100%. Dude will do anything for that mf. Even if it means murder.

● At any given chance they will fight with Kenny. Doesn't matter where.

● Messiest eater you will ever meet.

● DEADLY AFRAID OF MICROWAVES.

● Feels guilty about hurting Milo a few times even tho he (Milo) doesn't remember

● He LOVES white chocolate macadamia nut cookies.

● He knows a lot of those random facts that you just remember sometimes. Most commonly related to his interests.

● Would probably break down if he was fired, even though his boss wouldn't fire him. (She's too nice)

● Once gifted a blade of grass by Axel (his not really friend friend) and ate it.

● Usually gets things he wants through being persuaded or he'll get it by force.

● If you don't believe him, he'll probably shrug it off. Can't do much to change what you think.

● Doesn't feel bad about doing anything regarded to his work but does get a bit sad when

he accidentally hurts people he's close to.

● Almost got caught stealing from a candy store once.

● If he doesn't like you he would most likely be passive aggressive and when nobody is looking he'd call you insults.

● Very affectionate if he likes you. (hugs, handshakes, highfives, fistbumps, etc.)

● Once put cheese in a toaster. Never again.

● Definitely doesn't watch Milo while he sleeps. (he does)

● Really good at random tricks alone but when he tries to show someone he fails miserably. (stopped when someone got a concussion)

● Prefers to stay inside and not at social gatherings.

● If you shake his hand loosely and he barely likes you, he'll grip your hand and shake it tighter. If he likes you enough to be friends, he'll ask if you're alright.

● Picked up random mannerisms of animals. (He watched too much discovery channel as a kid)

● Definitely would hold a TED Talk about "Why it's okay to break into Milo's house"

● Doesn't get things like "Its raining cats and dogs" because idioms are scary.

● Could probably learn French if he wanted to.

● Talks a lot but if you have something more important to say he will gladly listen.

● Forgot about Erin but Erin remembers him well. (With or without the new vessel)

● Down to do anything (except follow the law)

● Immediate response to anything is to fight. Used to be flight.

● Epic music taste??? But it's all over the place.

● Bird person. No cats. No dogs. No lizards. BIRDS.

• Didn't enjoy killing people, but A, he got used to it, and B, his boss pays big bucks >:3

[fancybootm]

Poly Wolf Pack Wedding HCs(Pt.1)

Redacted Masterlist

Warnings: Slight mentions of NSFW topics, but more of friendly banter rather than graphic details

- So in this, I'm including David, Milo, Asher, and Angel.

- Straight out the gate, it's Asher and Milo who propose first.

- Milo mentions how his mom wants the four of them to get married, and Asher agrees

- "She won't stop yappin' about it. By how much she talks about it, you'd think shes more invested in our relationship than any of us are."

- "Aw give her a break, I think it'd be nice to get married to you guys. I call dibs on picking out the rings though!"

- "Over my dead corpse! I came up with the idea, I choose the rings!"

- Milo and Ash raced to the nearest jewelry store in town

- "I beat ya to the store! Not so feisty anymore huh, Milo?"

- "Can it, bottom."

- Unfortunately, in their rush to pick out the rings first, both of them forgot that they know absolutely nothing about wedding rings

- But, that didn't stop them from giving their all

- The poor assistant had to politely explain to them that no, they couldn't spend 4 hours walking them through the process of picking out the perfect ring, because the store was about to close

- "Sirs, I appreciate your enthusiasm, however I cannot change the store hours. If you want time to pick your rings out, you'll have to come back tomorrow"

- Flash forward to the next morning, they were there. Waiting outside the door of the jewelry store, and with a couple confused texts from David as to why the two got up so early

- Through much trial and error, and many stupid questions, they finally picked out the best rings available

- For themselves, they let their counterpart pick out their ring

(proposal + rings below cut)

- Milo picked out a nice, silver ring for Ash:

- And Asher picked out a forest themed ring, and thought it fit Milo nicely:

For David, the two thought a slick, rustic ring would do wonderfully:

- And lastly Angel's ring was(you can pick one)

- Once they had the rings lined out, they had to plan the long awaited proposal

- They rented a lodge during the springtime, and they had a week long get away with their lovers

- It was fairly secluded, the the boys could run about in their wolf forms without having to worry about covert rules

- On the final night they were staying, Milo and Ash made a grand dinner

- "It'll be a feast fit for a king!!! We'll make everyone's favorite foods!"

-"You mean I'll make everyone's favorite foods. Last time ya used a stove we had to change the batteries of the smoke alarm cause of how long it kept beeping'."

- "It was one time! Let me help, I promise I'll do good this time. You're acting like David."

- "Well David keeping you out of the kitchen was a blessing to us all, Ash."

- Despite much bickering, the food was made, and everyone loved it

- The actual proposal was started by Ash, since he let it slip too soon.

- "We hope you liked the food! We have a big grand gesture waiting for you after this!"

- Followed by Asher giving a painfully obvious wink to Milo

- "What are you two on about? Last time I checked David was the closed off one."

- "Don't worry about it Angel. What Ash was trying to say was that we have to tell you something after dinner."

- Ultimately, the proposal went well, and the two previously oblivious to Milo + Asher's mischief, said yes

[iamknicole]

Heartbreak Hotel Pt. 2

Bloodline Family Series

Koda needed to go home. He couldn't be in Miami right now. No matter how juvenile it sounded he wanted his parents, he wanted them to tell him it would be okay and how he could fix it so it wouldn't hurt anymore. When he got in the house Roman was running around with Messiah and Micah, laughing and smiling. Seeing it brought a small smile to his face. His little brothers noticed him and ran straight for him, attacking his legs. Koda picked them both up kissing their cheeks.

"Brody, you home!" Micah squealed happily.

"We fight?" Messiah asked.

Roman approached his boys, pulling the three year olds from Koda's arms putting them on the floor. He ignored their pouting and squatted to their level.

"It's naptime. You guys go on upstairs, get your sister and get in me and Mommy's bed. Good deal?" He asked.

"Him stay?" Messiah asked looking at Koda, who nodded.

"I'm not leavin. I'll be here a few days, SiSi." (like sigh)

Koda followed Roman to his man cave after the boys had gone upstairs. Both men sat on the large sofa.

"What's botherin you, Ko?"

Koda shook his head then rubbed at his eyes. "Nothin, I'm good."

"Come on now, son." Roman said squeezing his shoulder. "I know you better than that. Your eyes are red and misty, your face is red and your hair isn't done. So I'll ask again, what's botherin you?"

Koda opened his mouth but nothing came out. He couldn't bring himself to say it. Instead he cried, he cried like he had done the past two days whenever he was alone. He felt this pain was unbearable. Roman watched his oldest for a second, it had been a while since he'd seen him cry like this.

"What's goin on, son? What happened?" Roman asked.

"It's Parker, Pop," he explained through his sobbing.

Roman started to worry, he thought the worst.

"What about her? Is she pregnant? Did something happen to her, Ko?"He nodded, holding his head down. "What are you nodding to?"

Koda looked up at his dad trying to hold back the rest of his tears. When he opened his mouth this time, Kandice walked in. She saw him crying and rushed to sit beside him, pulling his head to her chest.

"What's wrong with my baby, Roman? What did you do?"

Laughing a little, Roman shook his head at his wife. Whenever any of their kids were crying she asked that question. It didn't matter if they both entered together she still asked. "I didn't do anything to your baby, Kandi. He was gonna tell me but he started crying."

Koda sat up, out of her hold, trying to slow down the tears. His head was starting to hurt and he didn't want to deal with that. "Friday after my game she wanted me to go to this party with her," he started slowly. "We won and I usually go to whatever after party but I played all four quarters, I was tired. But she went."

Kandice sucked her teeth at him. "Boy, you better not be crying cause she went to a party without you."

Roman glared at his wife, "Hush, Kandi. Let him finish."

"Fine, fine," she said putting her hands up. "Go head, Ko."

Koda scratched his growing beard. "She came over Sunday and I guess that's when Eli and Lo found out and showed it to me."

"Showed you what," Roman asked.Koda couldn't look at either of his parents.

"She was mad at me for not goin with her so she," he paused feeling his anger and more tears starting to rise. Kandice rubbed his back and Roman told him to go on.

"She fu- had sex with these dudes that play for Auburn on Instagram live."

"She what?" Kandice yelled making Koda jump.

"I asked her and she just kept saying she was sorry, over and over. But that don't fix this shit," he cried putting his head down.

Roman nodded his head at Kandice for her to leave them. She didn't want to go but she knew it would be better for Koda if she did. Once she was out of the room and in the kitchen, she called Apryl and Trinity to vent while Koda continued to vent to Roman.

"I treated her exactly how you taught me, Pop. I did what I was supposed to do and she did that."

"You did what you were supposed to do, Koda. You can't control what someone else does."

"I love her, she said she loved me too. I don't go to one party and that's what she does," he yelled out of frustration. "Then she came straight to the apartment after the party and kissed me in my mouth."

Roman didn't want to ask but he knew he needed to.

"Did yall have sex that night?" Koda nodded making him sigh. "You used a hat?"

"Yeah. She told me not to, we almost didn't cause she got mad about me wearing one. Now I know why." He said bitterly.

That made Roman happy. His son had listened to something.

"What about oral?"

"She did. I didn't," Koda shrugged sitting back, "It was late. I ain't want her to wake E and Lo up."

While Roman continued to calm Koda down, Kandice was trying to calm her nerves on the phone. Apryl was playing devil's advocate and Trinity was the peace maker.

"I say you grab your bat, Kandi. I'll bring my knife and Trin will bring her taser. It'll be a nice lil trip to Miami."

"No," Trinity chastised, "We're not jumping that lil girl. That's not gonna make him feel any better."

"Hell, it'll make us feel a whole lot better."

"No, Apryl."

Kandice laughed. "Where was this energy when that girl broke Eli's heart? We had to barricade you in the house tp keep you from jumping on that girl."

"I don't recall," Trinity laughed.

Roman had pretty much calmed his son down and gotten him to sit back down. He'd thrown his arm around Koda squeezing his shoulder lovingly.

"Look, I'm not gonna tell you that this hurt is gonna go away cause its not. One day it just won't hurt as bad. And I won't tell you that you'll forget about it cause you won't. But I will say," Roman spoke softly, "One day you'll think about this and be thankful. You'll realize there was a reason for this."

Koda nodded listening to his dad.

"But dont let this pain just continue to hurt you. You gotta learn from it."

"Learn what?" Koda asked looking up.

"Later on when you're thinking about this you'll remember things that happened that didn't add up, that there were red flags for you and you'll learn not to ignore those things. You'll realize what you do6nt like in a partner and what you do. Understand?"

"Yes, sir. Thanks, Pops. I love you"

Koda loved the bond he had with his dad. There was nothing else in his life like it. Eli and Milo are his best friends but his dad was his first best friend.

Roman pulled his son into a hug, squeezing him tight. He kissed his head before letting go. "I love you too, Ko. Go share some of that love with ya mama before she gets jealous."

Laughing, Koda got up to go to the kitchen. When he got to the kitchen Kandice hurried off the phone and engulfed him in a big hug when he was close enough. Even though he's a foot and some inches taller than her, she still cradled him like she did when he was a baby. She hugged him tight, holding back tears, until he pulled away.

"Aight, ma. I gotta stop or Ima cry again."

Kandice laughed a little, happy to see him in better spirits.

"I'm sorry. Yall know I don't play about my babies so I had to love on you."

"I know, Ma. Thank you."

"You're welcome. Koda?"

"Yes ma'am," he answered softly. He leaned against the island with his hands pushed into the pockets of his sweat pants.

"Don't let one person ruin your mood. You hold your head up like the man that you are. This hurts now but you'll be given something much better."

Koda nodded listening to his mama talk.

"When you get back to that campus, I want you to hold your head up, put you some clothes on and do your hair. You be the man me and your Daddy raised you to be. Understand?"

"Yes ma'am. Thank y'all. I had to come home, I couldn't stay there like this."

Kandice nodded, she understood.

"Did Milo and Eli help?"

"Yeah, they tried but this wasn't something they could really help with. I needed you and Pops."

Kandice went to Koda putting her hands on his face. Leaning up on her toes and pulling his head down she kissed his forehead and whispered a prayer over him.

"I love you, Mama." He admitted softly.

"I love you too, baby boy. Always and forever."

A few days later, Koda was back on campus. He needed the break away from everything, it did him good. By the time he got back, everyone had found out what Parker did to Koda. They were hard on her. Everyone knew how well he treated her and took care of her so they thought it was stupid of her to cheat on Koda the way she did. Girls were constantly trying to steal Koda from Parker only to find out how faithful and committed to Parker he was.

Eli and Milo had finally gotten him to come to a house party with them. He did what his mama told him to do. He got dressed, did his hair and got himself together.

As the cousins walked into the house party, a girl bumped into Koda. He caught her around her waist before she could fall to the floor. When he opened his mouth to apologize, she stopped him.

"Don't," she smiled, "It was my fault. I'm clumsy."

"But still," Koda said still holding onto her, "You aight?"

"Yeah, I'm good. I promise."

"Aight then, sweetheart. You be careful." He nodded letting her go

"I'll try."

She laughed as she walked off. Koda watched her until Eli smacked his arm playfully.

"My boy is back!"

The laughing cousins moved quickly through the party to the kitchen. Milo grabbed them each a beer and passed them to his cousins.

"Here, here," Milo laughed raising his beer, "To our cousin. Haven't been single but a week and half and already got girls tripping over him!"

[iamknicole]

Heartbreak Pt. 1

Bloodline Family Series

Koda, Eli and Milo sat in the living room of their campus side apartment eating and watching a football game. They finally had a whole day off from football practice and had used it to work out a bit and lie around.

"When Aunni come back in town, Uce?" Koda asked Milo from his spot on the floor.

"Next week I think."

Eli sat quietly staring at his phone while Koda and Milo went on talking about their girlfriends. Usually he would come in, happy to have any chance to talk about Nola. But he was distracted by a live he found on Instagram from two days ago after their football game.

"The hell you doin over there," Milo asked laughing.

Eli shook his head. "Lookin at a video. Yall said some?"

Koda got ready to catch him up but someone knocked on their door, he hopped up to go get it. While Koda was at the door eli hurried and sat next to Milo giving his phone into his face.

"Look at this shit, Lo. I dunno how we ain't see this."

Milo took the phone confused. He watched a little longer and started to frown.

"Is that who I think it is?" He asked.

"Yup. I wasn't sure at first but then I saw that stupid ass unicorn tattoo. And look who else is in the it."

Milo covered his mouth, cursing lowly to himself. "That's the quarterback from Auburn ain't it?"

"And two of the wide receivers. That's some bullshit." Eli fussed.

Milo shook his head as he handed his cousin back his phone. "We gotta tell him when he come back in here. We can't let nobody else tell him."

Koda came back into their living room holding Parker's hand, smiling. She waved happily at his cousins.

"Hey, Lo. Hey, Eli. Did I interrupt ya'll?" She asked looking at their faces.

Eli rolled his eyes at her, "Yeah, ya did and still are."

"Chill, E," Milo whispered. "We need to talk to Koda though. Do you mind?"

Looking at his cousins strangely for a second then turned to Parker, who looked confused, Koda asked her to wait for him in his room. She nodded then leaned up to kiss him but Eli stopped her.

"Bye, Parker. You'll see him in a second, no need for that."

"Oookay. I'll be in the room then."

Koda waited until he heard his door close before he started to fuss at his cousins.

"The hell was that? Yall been with me all day."

"We really need to talk to you, Ko," Milo told him softly.

"It better be important especially for E to have a attitude. And don't talk to her like that again, E. Forreal, cousin or not."

Eli shrugged. "That's doable cause I won't see her again after tonight."

Koda stepped closer to him, "You got something you need to say, Uce?"

Eli stood then Milo. He got between them, pushing them back a bit. "E, cut it out. You're issue is not with him. And, Ko, just chill."

Koda nodded trying to calm himself down. "What we need to talk about?"

Milo had them both sit down, with him in between them. He grabbed Eli's phone, unlocked it and passed it to Koda. He laughed when it started.

"This shit couldn't wait till later?" He asked laughing passing the phone back. Eli pushed it back telling him to keep watching. His face started to frown up again. "What the fuck?"

"Exactly! That bitch dirty, I been tellin you shit wasn't addin up, Ko." Eli said just as angry.

Koda looked away from the phone, taking deep breaths. "Can't fuckin believe this fuckin hoe."

"Aight let's calm down with the names. We're upset but let's not." Milo told them.

Eli sucked his teeth in Milo's direction. "Fuck that. She don't get to do that shit and get my respect, fuck her, Lo."

Koda got up from the sofa, his hands swinging at his side, his cousins stood behind him. "Come 'ere, Parker!"

"That's right," Eli nodded.

"Just calm down."

Milo was the angel on his left shoulder, trying to calm Koda down. Then there was Eli, the demon on his right shoulder, hyping his cousin up. Slowly, Parker emerged from one of the back bedrooms. She took a look at Koda's body language and face and frowned.

"Why're you lookin at me like that? What's wrong?"

"Ima ask you one time. You got something you wanna tell me, Parker?"

She looked at his cousins then him shaking her head. "No, I don't. Why?"

"Wrong answer," Eli spat.

"So you ain't fuck ole dude from Auburn?"

"Dudes," Milo added quickly.

Koda cut his eyes at Milo briefly then back at Parker waiting for her answer.

"Baby," she whined stepping closer to him, "I was mad at you and I wasn't thinking, I just did it. It was a mistake. I'm sorry."

Milo shook his head. "Sorry is a sorry ass word."

"What I do to you that bad to piss you off that you go and do that shit and put it on live? Cause you knew I would see it." Koda asked with a huff.

Parker started to cry, or was trying to, and grabbed his hands which he snatched away "I don't remember, Ko. It's not important."

"It is important, Parker! What the fuck did I do to you? Huh?" He yelled moving closer to the short girl. "I've never cheated on you, lied to you, talked to you crazy. I've been faithful to you. I take care of you, buy you whatever you want, take you wherever you want. What did I do?"

Milo started to pull Koda back but Eli stopped him. He knew Koda wouldn't go too far, he was just upset. It was pissing Koda off even more that she wasn't talking.

"Speak, girl!" He yelled making her jump.

"I was upset that you didn't wanna come out with me," she explained softly.

Koda laughed bringing his hands up near her face. "Are you serious right now? You forreal? I had a fuckin game against the dudes you was fuckin that night! I played for quarters straight, the only break I had was the fifteen minutes during half time! I was fuckin tired, Parker."

"Baby, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry." Sir screamed in tears.

"Wait," he threw his hands up starting to think, "You came here after that party."

"Ah fuck," Eli whispered. He and Milo made eye contact, pulling Koda back when he went to lunge at Parker.

"Ya nasty ass came in here and kissed me in my fuckin mouth after that shit!" Koda fought against his cousins trying to get to her. "You disgustin ass bitch, I should fuckin kill you! What the fuck is wrong with you?"

Parker approached them crying, jumping back when Koda almost got loose. "Koda, please. I'm sorry."

"You need to leave, Parker." Milo spoke calmly still holding his cousin back.

Parker shook her head at him, not moving.

"No?" Eli asked in disbelief. "Get your shit and get the fuck out before I let this man go. I'm bout holdin him back for your sake, I'm doin it for his."

Running to Koda's bedroom, Parker got her purse and shoes then ran out of the apartment. Milo and Eli let their cousin go, trusting he wouldn't follow her out the door. He turned to them with tears in his eyes and his hands at his hips.

"I been with her since we was 16, bruh. Four years. Four years of nothing but being good to her ass. And she does that foul shit cause I ain't wanna go to a fuckin party, dawg. What the fuck?"

Eli moved closer to him, feeling bad for his cousin. "Its gon be aight, cuz. I know you love her but its gon be aight."

Koda hated to cry but he couldn't stop it. He tucked his lips to keep any noise in that might have passed his lips. Milo pulled him into a hug. Hugging Koda the same way Jey used to hug him. Eli joined the hug after seeing Koda's shoulders bouncing and hearing his ragged breathing.

"Its okay to cry, Ko," Milo assured him. "Let it out."